#brigid attempts to actually finish things

[brigid-faye]

small scene that's been bouncing around my head for idk a decade. not an excerpt from anything

Remus is standing in the shadows of the owlery, his chest jumping in too-quick breaths behind his folded arms, his barely-17-year-old face scowling and Sirius knows - he knows - the other boy is about two seconds from bursting into tears. Sirius doesn't understand why James and Peter don't seem to see that.

Unfortunately the two of them are currently between him and Remus, because those two are the sorts of friends you turn to when you're upset. You go to Peter for sympathy. You go to James to be buoyed up. Sirius knows who he is. His brand of fury will just make it worse.

"You sent it already?" James is asking, confused and disappointed.

"Why not?" Remus snaps.

They're talking about a note Remus just let fly, one in response to a nasty letter he received less than an hour ago over breakfast. The letter was rescinding an offer of a summer job at the national museum Remus got a week earlier. The letter didn't say they were pulling the offer because they learned Remus was a werewolf but Remus assumed that. Sirius did, too, because the world is shitty sometimes. (A concept Sirius is starting to understand that James and Peter don't quite grasp.)

James looks bewildered. Peter makes a 'slow down' motion and says, "Well-but-what did you say?"

Remus shrugs. "Thanks for the opportunity," he says flatly. "What was I supposed to say?"

"That they're being assholes!" James says. "Or-or, I don't know, I could write my mum, she could-"

Remus makes a hopeless sound, a shaky laugh, bitter and lost enough that Sirius involuntarily takes a step closer.

Remus looks at him.

Remus turns those hazel eyes to Sirius, his expression angry and hurt and pleading, and fuck-fuck-fuck this year has been a delicate, delicious, terrifying mess between the two of them and Sirius is so gone for him, and has no idea where they're going, or what he's supposed to do, but Remus is begging him to get this - this right here - right, so Sirius stops thinking.

He steps between James and Peter and yanks Remus into his arms.

Remus is startled; Sirius notices the way he stiffens and pulls back a little, like Sirius might think better of this. But when Sirius doesn't, when Sirius just holds tighter and says "Fuck 'em" in his ear, Remus collapses against his shoulder, letting go of his tears and hiding his face in Sirius' neck.

James and Peter are right there and silent and there's no way this looks like an embrace between friends, but Sirius doesn't care. Because maybe Peter is more comforting and James inspires hope, but Sirius is the one Remus wants right now, and that is everything Sirius needs.

[valorandgold]

lucresence​:

valorandgold​:

“No, Dorothea, I was not minding to be helping you. I am knowing you are trying very hard to be having…” What was the best way to put it? It wasn’t physical strength, like how Petra trained most of the time. It wasn’t as if she didn’t know how spells such as the one that had flung from Dorothea’s hand wildly worked in a more general sense, yet it was hard to find the exact words of what she was trying to hone in on. After a few moments of silently mulling it over, Petra finally finished her thought as she settled upon words that seemed satisfactory enough, “…more concentration.” She was even pretty sure she got the conjugation of that word right in thinking it over so much. 

“I would not have worrying, Dorothea. Everything is being back in its place, and this can be staying just between us. But you are seeming to be having much more stress lately. Is something being on your mind?”

“Is it that obvious?” The songstress had been waiting patiently for the other to finish her sentence. Admittedly, Petra had improved her language skills quite a lot since their time at the Academy, but Dorothea was rather grateful for the small, occasional breaks. Regardless how short, it offered a weirdly relaxing moment of simply listening without thinking too much. Perhaps that was one of the reason she felt so relaxed when talking to the other woman.

Eyes wandering off to avoid meeting Petra’s gaze, Dorothea wrapped her arms in a protective manner around herself.

“Well, it can hardly be missed when it causes my spells to misfire, I assume…” Another sigh. “It’s just… Have you noticed that more children have been arriving? No parents, no home, … Seeing so many of them sometimes makes me feel very, very small. Maybe it’s my own past catching up to me, but it kind of scares me, I think. Sorry if that doesn’t make much sense…”

Despite the struggles that had come with trying to verbally speak a language that was not her native tongue, one’s facial expressions and, as the saying went, ‘body language’ was something Petra was very well-versed in. Petra was rather perceptive of many things around her, particularly the way others reacted to certain things, which had been a useful tool in aiding her when she had attempted to use Fodlan’s language and discern if she had said something wrong (though when Byleth was more expressionless than most, it had not helped her much in that case). Dorothea had never been particularly good at hiding her emotions either, or at least not to Petra, especially since the war had begun. She seemed considerably more jaded these days too, and not always possessing the same energy the songstress fairly consistently had during the days before all of it started.”

Ah, that was what concerned her. It actually made perfect sense to Petra. “No, I am having understanding, Dorothea. Sometimes they are making me remember myself.” Despite often seeming more determined than ever, which was necessary if she wanted Brigid to achieve its independence that much sooner, the war had made a similar impact on Petra, something Dorothea was about to get some insight into. “The children we have had seeing of at the monastery that are being taken care of here...I am knowing how they are feeling, very much so. To be seeing them away from their home, having to be here because of a war they are not having participating in, in a place that is not having familiarness for them, and not knowing if they are going to be having sight of where they are being from before and missing it much...it is giving me much reminiscence of who I was being- who I still am being in some ways.”

In fact, despite knowing Dorothea’s past and why she was so reminded of where she came from, Petra probably understood how they felt even better than the brunette did, primarily because of how different the circumstances were. “Dorothea...were you...having seeing of me in that same way when I was first coming here? Be having honesty with me. It will not be making me upset if you were. I am simply wanting to be knowing.” 

lucresence​:

starter for @valorandgold Dorothea || Petra

“You really didn’t have to do that, Petra! I’m sorry if you were in a hurry and wasted your time on cleaning up this mess with me!”

A light tone of guilt was in Dorothea’s voice as she placed the last wooden sword back on its pile. It really was not like her to cause such a commotion, the new training swords really had been scattered across half of the training grounds. She had been lucky that the conjured lightning had missed them by a few meters, yet the voltage had seemingly been grasping at them with hungry claws.

“I don’t even want to think about what kind of an earful I would have gotten…” A heavy sigh escaped her at the mere thought of it. “You won’t tell anyone, will you?”

“No, Dorothea, I was not minding to be helping you. I am knowing you are trying very hard to be having...” What was the best way to put it? It wasn’t physical strength, like how Petra trained most of the time. It wasn’t as if she didn’t know how spells such as the one that had flung from Dorothea’s hand wildly worked in a more general sense, yet it was hard to find the exact words of what she was trying to hone in on. After a few moments of silently mulling it over, Petra finally finished her thought as she settled upon words that seemed satisfactory enough, “...more concentration.” She was even pretty sure she got the conjugation of that word right in thinking it over so much. 

“I would not have worrying, Dorothea. Everything is being back in its place, and this can be staying just between us. But you are seeming to be having much more stress lately. Is something being on your mind?”

[gravesofheirscog]

What are the kid's reaction to swearing? And yes, I won't refer to them as ROs until they're 18+. Currently they are all my younger siblings whom I love very much lol.

I ask because they're all in their pre teens and some of them have strict church upbringing. And how would they react to a genuinely sweet, caring and nice MC who starts creatively cursing like a sailor when they stub their toe?

This was a really fun request! Thank you so much!

Vitalius/Astasus: Will repeat what you said like the sheltered church boy he is - if you said it, it can't be bad, right? In actuality, he's the only one of the kids not familiar with swears for... reasons. When he finds out what the word means, he's not terribly bothered. It's just a word, after all. What has him more worried is the fact that you hurt yourself. Are you okay? Can he help? He'll attempt to heal it and make you feel better.

Eratine: Likes to pretend he's badass, but despite knowing what swears are he's never had the guts to say one out loud. Once tried it when he was alone but couldn't force it out. He'll be shocked when he hears you swear - if he's drinking anything it will come flying out. He was already suspicious of this whole 'nice' persona you've got going on, and this only solidifies that in his mind. Will laugh that you stubbed your toe, though, after he makes sure you're okay.

Bernadine: She's not terribly crass, but she is all about anything the Church doesn't approve of. She won't swear out loud, but her notes are something else entirely: In the fucking year 950 Holy Fucking Age, the shitty king Bitch Florentinus Ornstein oversaw and eventually ended the dumbfuck civil fucking war between... She quietly laughs after she's made sure you're okay.

Brigid/Hesychia: Unlike Bernadine, Brigid/Hesychia will admit to being occasionally crass. Also unlike Bernadine however, she's somewhat more averse the swear words. After she makes sure you're okay, she'll dramatically clutch her pearls and chide you for being inappropriate somewhat.

Miki-Tane: Started swearing just to laugh at the people who react. To see the sweet, kind you drop everything to curse out in pain will have him rolling in laughter. He's almost crying with how hard he's laughing, but after he's finished he will check up on you.

Diacinth: First things first - are you okay???? Seconds things second - what did you just say???? You're hurt, but what if someone heard you? What's he supposed to do? He's a little more nervous around things the Church disapproves of, and he's having a bit of a freak out in the corner.

Nonnatus: Remember how I said the only one not really familiar with swears was Vitalius/Astasus for reasons? Nonnatus is reasons. He was raised outside the Church and picked up some pretty sour language in the process. He's working on it, but it's second nature to him at this point. He won't admit it but he also swears more to try and lean out of his pretty boy disposition. Hearing you swear however has him stunned into silence. The sweet and kind you swearing like him? He's stuttering, scolding you for your ungodly deeds.

"What the fuck, MC?" He'll ask. "Swearing isn't fucking virtuous!"

[chercher0w0]

A Curse so Dark and Lonely by Brigid Kemmerer Cover art by Jeanette Levy

Why I read this I do still want to read all the Beauty and the Beast retellings I come across.

Rating: 4.5/5

This book made me care about the supporting characters and the kingdom as much as the romance between the main characters. Wasn’t even planning on reading this but finished it in a night because I couldn’t put it down.

I don’t really like reading synopses so I didn’t realize that the girl would be from the present time, complete with handphone which she brings along to the fantasy world, which was an interesting dynamic.

Spoilers behind the cut.

This will probably be quite rambly and just me talking about what I loved but I really didn’t expect to enjoy it as much as I did. Perhaps seeing a few glimpses of negative reviews put me off, though that didn’t hinder my enjoyment of ACOTAR. Perhaps DNF-ing “Of Curses and Kisses” put me into a bit of a slump but anyway.

I initially rated this 4/5, though I think mostly because it wasn’t really overtly romantic, though that’s actually a compliment for how the characters developed over the course of the story. One of the challenges of a BATB retelling is making the romance realistic, without veering into Stockholm Syndrome, because the catalyst for the protagonists meeting is usually some sort of kidnapping.  At the end of this book, I felt it was still kind of ambiguous whether Harper really fell in love with Rhen, or the curse was broken because the enchantress was killed. Probably. 

Rhen Yes, Prince hot. But also I really found his personality interesting. After so many failed attempts, he’s jaded. And also because of his upbringing, he’s naturally a calculating person, always thinking several steps ahead. Great for leading a kingdom, not so good for getting a complete stranger to fall in love with you because there’s no formula or strategy for “true love”.  Although he is jealous of Grey and Harper’s friendship, he isn’t overtly possessive or petty like Tamlin in ACOTAR, which is nice.  Also... he started of as a seemingly dumb arrogant Prince who loses his family due to tragedy and after 5 years (in the real world) finally realizes he actually does care for his kingdom and has the gravitas to lead his people and give them hope, no matter how impossible the situation seems. I CANNOT UNSEE THE SHADES OF OLIVER QUEEN THE MORE I THINK ABOUT IT.

Harper I really enjoyed her character. I’ll be honest and say that until reviews pointed out that instead of Belle’s bookishness making her the outsider, the fact that she was disabled was what made her one, I... actually thought it was because she was poor, and on the brink of resorting to crime.  I liked how even though she is a very independent person and attempts to stand up for herself against Rhen and Grey, she also has realistic flaws. Like not being able to understand the etiquettes of the fantasy world, being from the modern era, and unable to see how some of her decisions and actions might have long term political consequences since she’s acting as Rhen’s princess in a sort of medieval societal structure. 

Grey I loved how Grey slowly became more friendly as he lets his guard down around Harper. It really reminded me of Lucien and Feyre in ACOTAR. Actually, the idea of the “beauty” falling in love with the person who brings her into the magical world instead of the usually cold and closed-off prince is an interesting concept, but I digress.  Despite what Rhen seems to think, I read Grey and Harper’s relationship more as brother and sister. Especially once we learn that Grey was the eldest of 9 siblings. In fact, as I continued to read about Grey’s loyalty towards Rhen even after so many years, I was hoping it would be revealed that the reason he stayed and believed in Rhen for so long was that he was secretly in love with the prince. But, I guess not.  I am very interested in how the plot twist revealed at the end will play out.

The Romance Since this is a BATB retelling, obviously the “beauty” and the “beast” were going to end up together. Honestly, it could have ended with more of a platonic love and I would have been satisfied, with maybe a more romance lean in the sequels. Because, as the book does point out, it’s hard to force true love, especially when there’s the pressure of wanting to lift the curse out of guilt and responsibility towards his kingdom on Prince Rhen’s side, and Harper’s distrust of him and his calculating, jaded nature as well as her constant worry for her family back home. It’s a lot to expect from a slightly less than 3 month deadline. It was a nice change that instead of falling in love with the beast, or true love anyway as the curse dictates, Harper falls in love with the kingdom and the people in it first, and does genuinely want to lift the curse to save all of them. Sadly, it’s not the sort of thing that can be forced.  It was also really interesting when she actually figures out by herself, fairly early on, what the curse entails, though there was not reference to her having read Beauty and the Beast or any other type of fairy tale. Wouldn’t have fit the tone of the scene, of course, but it’s an amusing thought since she would probably have heard those as a kid in the present day.

I’m really excited to read the sequel. I want to see what happens with the war against the rival country. And how the plot twist revealed at the end will play out. Is the enchantress really dead? Also exploring more of the ramifications between travelling between the fantasy world and the modern world, since at the end even her brother and his boyfriend are trapped together with Harper in Emberfall.  

Re-readability Definitely

[welcometothebookreport]

In 2020, I read 40 books (with maybe a few more to be added after I post this) after discovering my love of reading all over again. I am not a very hard reader to please, so it will be rare for me to rate a book with a low score, so I doubt you’ll ever see any criticism from me. So, here we go!

A few things before I start: There are three series in this list (but technically only two, because I’ve only read Serpent & Dove so far) but I’ve limited myself to no repeat authors. That must have been the hardest part for me. Since Jessi went the extra mile and ranked them in order, I’ve decided to make myself suffer the same. And while most of these were not published in 2020, they were read in 2020.

I am (sometimes) a picky reader, but any book that is on this list, I have loved. I chose not to rate them because honestly, they would have all been high. I give ratings easily, and try not to pick things apart even for books I truly did not like.

Please keep in mind that I do my best to add trigger warnings, but you should always check for certain triggers before reading. Triggers vary for everyone.

10. Saint Anything by Sarah Dessen

Warnings: There’s a male character that’s a creep and you’ll spot him as soon as you crack this one open. This tale deals with Peyton being sentenced to prison, and their mother practically glossing over what he’s done by victim blaming.

I have read Dessen’s books since I was 13 and I truly still enjoy her stories as much as I did then. While this was a re-read for me, it’s a tie for my favorite book of hers. It’s tied with Along For the Ride.

Sydney is left in the aftermath after her older brother, Peyton, is sentenced to prison after a drunk driving accident that paralyzes a boy. Formerly in his shadow, Sydney struggles to discover what it is she wants, and how she wants to be seen as her own mother seems to gloss right over her. It’s a YA read that always feels like more than the romance that originally interested me.

9.  Serpent & Dove by Shelby Mahurin

Warnings: Misogyny. The church and religion plays an extremely heavy part of this plot, which was hard for me to get into. It’s clear that some characters do not value women in their actions and words toward Lou. It made me uncomfortable in spots because I just wanted to get past it, but I plan to read this one again since I know that it won’t bother me this time! Still, there is: violence in parts, religious zealots (in case that’s something that makes you uncomfortable like it did me), derogatory slurs toward women, and again, misogyny.

I finished this one two days ago, and I sincerely cannot wait to dig into the sequel. Lou is a witty, snappy character that was such a breath of fresh air from the normal. You usually see the male lead that’s a bit crude, a bit quick to pull the trigger, and the one that’s harder to crack. Is that what happened here? Absolutely fucking not. Shelby Mahurin took something I loved, enemies to lovers, and kicked its ass. Forced marriage? UM YES. A witch and a witch-hunter? Mortal enemies? Characters that can never possibly love each other? DONE DONE DONE.

It’s hilarious in parts. Serious when it needs to be. A bit spicy too, while not a lot, which I certainly appreciate. Reid’s character development is a wonder to watch, at least for me, and by the end of the book, I am so in love with him that I don’t know what to do with myself. I have so many annotations for this novel.

8. The Shadows Between Us by Tricia Levenseller

Warnings: There’s a fair bout of murder. Women are expected not to take lovers before marriage while men are not held to the same standard. Gross. Allessandra is continually underestimated so let me say: let the women do the work.

It’s called the Slytherin romance we’ve been waiting for, and I agree. While this is a shorter read, and a standalone, I was pleased with it. Both characters are incredibly ambitious, but it’s Allessandra that steals the show. The plan? To enter the palace, woo the king, and then kill him in order to take his kingdom. She’s wicked in all the ways I love.

I loved this book, and each page, but this was the line that will make me return to it: “I’m not a trollop,” I announce to the empty room. “I’m a sexually empowered woman, and there’s nothing wrong with that.”

The Folk of the Air Series by Holly Black

Warnings: Aside from murder, there’s nothing that stands out to me as a trigger.

A series! The first! There’s something interesting about this series for me, and it’s that I didn’t fall in love altogether, all at once. It was gradual, like wading into water until it went right over my head. By the final fourth of The Cruel Prince, I was fully invested in this world and I absolutely needed to know how Jude and Cardan would become, well, Jude and Cardan.

As a YA series, I was not expecting the sheer amount of mystery, political intrigue, and plot twists that came with this series. However, I never knew what was going to happen, and if I did guess what was coming, Black had at least two more twists to send me for a loop. The Queen of Nothing was likely my favorite book of the series, with The Wicked King as a close second.

6. Red, White & Royal Blue by Casey McQuiston

Warnings:  Discussion of attempted non-con assault, forced disclosure of sexuality

I laughed until my eyes watered and I nearly cried in this book. Delightfully funny, and snappy, RW&B delivers on everything I didn’t know that I needed. I had never read a book where LGBTQ was represented in such a positive light. As someone raised in a more conservative household, I’ve known my own sexual orientation for a long time, but this book made me feel like I could relax in my skin because this story was stunning.

Alex and Henry left me with so much hope that it’s impossible to ever put the lid back on. I’m so happy I read this.

(oh, god, we’re in the final five.)

5. The Caraval Series by Stephanie Garber

Warnings: Physical and emotional child abuse.

I could dedicate multiple posts to this series. Maybe I still will. While this is at number five, it’s my favorite series I’ve ever read. If I could only have one series to read for the rest of my life, I would choose this one. Hands down. Full stop. These characters live in my head constantly and I would give an obscene amount of things to read it all over again for the first time. I actually read this with two of my closest friends in our many book club, and we all loved it.

Doused in magic, this world is unveiled to us with excellent descriptions. Truly, Garber owned my heart within a few chapters. Scarlett is the elder sister, Tella the younger, and if you don’t love Tella by the end of Caraval, I promise you will. I know because I was skeptical, but here I am. I’ve said it to my friends, but Scarlett is the one who holds my hair while I have a hangover. Tella is the one that helps me start the bar fight.

With non-stop turns, and magic, everything comes to life on these pages. And the romance, the romance. Please, please give me my great love in this style. It’s not too much to ask for, is it?

4. Letters to the Lost by Brigid Kemmerer

Warnings:  loss of sibling, loss of parent, alcoholism, mention of infidelity, mentions of previous physical and emotional child abuse.

Mae sent this recommendation to me, and I devoured all of Kemmer’s books post-haste. Declan and Juliet fall in love without knowing who the other is, while also not liking the real version of their penpal. Juliet has lost her mother, and she’s treading water, but not well. Declan has suffered in the years that follow a family tragedy, and he’s not adapting to life with his new step-father.

But he opens with CemetaryGirl (Juliet) and it’s raw in the best of ways, and the openness between them that eventually moves from their bubble to reality is one of the most pleasing things to read. I’ve read it twice this year. I will read it again next year too.

I also read this twice this year and will for sure be reading it again in 2021.

3. The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern

Warnings: Child abuse.

This was another novel that I fell in love with as I went, and that’s definitely because of the non-linear narrative. It was a little confusing, but I’m going to read it again someday since I know everything now! I read this to follow-up to Caraval with my book club pals, and it’s just what I needed to leave Caraval behind. Marco and Celia are incredible and I absolutely believe that the ending of this novel is one of the best endings I’ve ever read.

My book club has not finished this book entirely this so I’m not sharing any spoilers, but I would like to share one of my favorite quotes. “What did you wish for?” “I wished for her.”

2. Next Year in Havana by Chanel Cleeton

Warnings: Cuba is in the middle of a revolution, and it’s tense in parts. There are some bittersweet elements and I think the parts of the ending are like the punch in the gut you need in order to wake you up and remember to live.

This was my first read once I really dug back into this hobby in August. It was picked by Reese Witherspoon for her book club, and she always picks good books. This is a dual timeline romance, and mystery. It’s an absolute stunner of a book. It’s a dear favorite to me now. I’ve never been to Cubs, or heard stories, but Cleeton manages to make you feel like you’re right there feeling saltwater spray across your face.

The romance made me feel breathless, but truly it’s the strong familial ties that make this such a beautiful gem. It leaves you with hope even in the dark and with love in the absence of it. I could scream about this book for the rest of my life, which I absolutely intend to do.

Favorite line? “You’re going to be difficult to walk away from, aren’t you?” “I hope so.”

1 In A Holidaze by Christina Lauren

Warnings? There are none that strike me. This is a lighthearted read that pulls at the heartstrings, but it’s by no means short on the laughs. And, I’m sorry for the long wall of text below.

In A Holidaze is the story of a woman stuck in her ways of never going after what she truly wants until a stray wish lands her in a time loop over the holidays. It's only after repeating the same day a few times that she quite literally says "fuck this," and starts living for HER. I really expected this to just be a Hallmark kind of read, but it was SO MUCH MORE. You should read it, even if it's after the holidays.

It's witty, and heart-wrenching, and it's just everything I didn't know I needed. Mae is snarky, and brave when she figures out that there is nothing stopping her, and the romance is - GODDAMN. Andrew. I need an Andrew and a fan.

It's not quite a love triangle, which was what I expected and I was so pleasantly surprised. I have grinned like a goddamn fool all day. I have giggled all day in front of customers, and my co-workers. I have nearly CRIED in my bedroom when my heart fell out of my ass and landed somewhere near my ankles, because hello, it's gonna get you.

This is going on my yearly re-read list for the holidays.

In the two days since I’ve finished, I’ve convinced my two friends in book club to read it, convinced Jessi to order it from Book of the Month Club, convinced another friend to read it, and bought it for Mae on Christmas day because her library had a six month hold and that was simply unacceptable.

[victoriadevereaux]

BAD MOMS 2

Time: idk we’ll say today for fun

Place: The Barn

People: Victoria, Aurora, Brigid, Derrick

Summary: Brigid lures Aurora into the barn where she tries to force Victoria into a brutal training exercise. Victoria is absolutely not having that, and goes ham on brigid for hurting Aurora. Also there’s an I love her but you didn’t hear that from me. 

Notes: No actual physical victoria/brigid abuse this time but I mean it’s brigid so it’s fucked up

BRIGID: Brigid prided herself on being a ruthless woman -- persistent, but smart enough to know when stubbornness would no longer serve. Willing to take the most direct path from where she stood to where she needed to be. Victoria needed to learn control, so Brigid taught it to her, with the might of her fist and her magic, sparing no expense for the most important lesson she could ever impart on her hybrid offspring. But when that pebble hit her waterlogged chalk mark, Brigid knew her methods were no longer working. Physical pain would not push her daughter past the point of losing control. But when the frazzled blonde head of Aurora Black rushed out of the Manor and into the courtyard to rescue her twitching, downed fiancee, inspiration struck. Victoria lost control in the most dangerous of ways when David was taken from them at the attack. Perhaps Victoria had learned the lesson to blocking out physical pain after two decades; perhaps emotional pain was the trigger Brigid needed to press next. She watched; she waited. Her daughter's concern when Aurora Black went 'missing' under Aemilia's supervision. The way she moved her fiancee into her own room after the fact. The smug look on Aurora Black's face not long after the full moon. Victoria had a weakness. On a cool, but sunny day, Brigid prepared herself, gathered her will and her plan and made her rounds about the Manor to find one Aurora Black. She pasted a polite smile on her cheeks. "Miss Black. It's a fine day and there are some things we should discuss. Would you mind taking a walk with me?"

AURORA: She's been having an overall good morning, done a round of her usual: shower, morning tea, breakfast. Now she's sitting in the living room, reading (she's been doing a lot of reading nowadays), while Victoria was off training like she did almost every morning. Its eerily quiet in the manor, which she assumes means most of the wolves have been keeping themselves in check lately and with no arguments in her pocket in the last 72 hours, she feels as though she can finally breathe. Or maybe it has something to do with her rapidly growing feelings for Victoria. Either way, she's still surprised, when Brigid finds her, and with a smile on her face nonetheless. It makes her instantly wary, especially after their last conversation, but she's stuck within a wall and a hard place -- she couldn't say no to her, as a coven leader and her soon to be mother-in-law. She puts her book down, trying her best to offer Brigid a smile in return. No one could ever put Aurora on edge more than Brigid Devereaux. "--- Sure. Of course. What do we need to discuss?"

BRIGID: The tight smile she receives makes Brigid's only curl higher. "I was hoping to discuss things between you and Victoria. Your coming nuptials. Family matters. Once we're little more private, of course. Walk with me?" Turning on her heel and heading toward the door, she gives Aurora little option but to follow or be left behind.

AURORA: She scurries towards Brigid the second she turns towards the door, not wanting to be left behind. The last thing she needed was for Brigid Devereaux to consider her an unlikely match for Victoria after everything they worked towards. She has to pick up her pace, but finally, falls in line with her as they walk outside. "My mother has yet to set a date for the wedding. But I am more than willing to go through with the arrangement Madam Devereaux. I had been hesitant at first but I've come to... Care about your daughter and I think we make a solid alliance together. At least, as far as I can tell".

BRIGID: "I'm quite aware of that, Miss Black," Brigid replies, leading the way down the path toward the old barn. "In fact, the alliance between you and my daughter is exactly what I was hoping to discuss." Her smile stays with the truth of her words. "You see, I believe Victoria has come to care about you a great deal, as well. In a way we do not tend to openly recognize in our family, but one that I see in her quite plainly all the same. Would you concur, Miss Black --- Aurora?"

AURORA: There's something about Brigid's question that makes her wary, but she's still inclined to answer it. She's still unsure where they're headed, but she recognizes the path they're on; Aurora draws some distance between them, just a cautious step to the side, a subtle flight response, but not enough to make her want to bolt. "Y-Yes?" It sounds like a question, she stutters over the word. "I care about her too. Isn't that what our union was supposed to be about? What good is it for if there's no loyalty anywhere?"

BRIGID: "I'm not asking to scold you for feeling for her," Brigid says, keeping her steps even as Aurora works smoothly to increase their distance. She doesn't seek to follow her. "In fact, I'm counting on them." She doesn't hesitate. The heel of her palm connects hard with the soft indent at Aurora's temple. As soon as the younger witch stumbles, Brigid's magic reaches out hot and fast to catch her, bind her limbs, support her weight as she drags the blonde Black the last few feet to the barn's open, waiting door. Brigid drops the girl graceless at the first set of shackles. Working quick, she secures the heavy iron over her fists first, then her ankles. As she stands and straightens her clothes, she runs her fingers over a vial of ash sitting waiting in her pocket. "Victoria will be joining us soon," she says, uncaring if the half-unconscious Aurora can actually hear her. "Then we will see how deeply her weakness truly runs."February 16, 202

VICTORIA: She'd gotten her mother's message, to meet in the barn. Victoria assumed there'd be some kind of training or perhaps a wolf to be punished that her mother needed help with. She didn't ask many questions. Just headed there at the proper time, once her training was finished and things were settled. Stepping inside the barn, a feeling rose in Victoria's gut, something sinking and odd and off centered. She turned, to see her mother and behind her Aurora, disoriented and chained, close to the wall she sat by in the strong, wolf shackles. "Aurora?" Victoria's eyes went wide and she looked from her fiancee to her mother. "Mom, what's --  Why is she in here?"

BRIGID: "She's here to help with your training," Brigid says simply, magic prickling at her fingertips as she reaches into her pocket to withdraw a small burlap sachet of dried herbs. "Let's make sure she's ready to join us, hmm?" Holding the sachet under Aurora's nose, Brigid's fist crumples, crushing the pungent herbs under the friction of her palm to wake the younger woman.

AURORA: It startled her awake, the strong smell of herbs Aurora thinks she’s familiar with, and she gasps as she returns from her forced sleep. She’s met with a strange sight; her fiancé across from her, looking perplexed, Brigid hovering close, and shackles around her wrists, that she attempts to pull unsuccessfully. “Victoria?” She groans. “What is happening?” It occurs to her that she’s trap, and that this can’t be good, so this time she tries magic to let her out of her shackles, and when nothing happens and she thrashes harder against the chains, she notices the ring around her on the ground. Ash. “What the hell is wrong with you? Let me go!”

BRIGID: She waits while the blonde realizes her predicament, while her daughter watches and Aurora makes demands. Once she is finished, Brigid crosses the room the a low wooden shelf, retrieves a piece of chalk, leather gloves and a small glass vial. She draws an X the size of a walnut on the barn's thick, worn stone wall before she returns to Aurora's side, donning the gloves and unstoppering the bottle. "I believe you know the rules," she tells her daughter. "There is a scarf on the shelf behind you. Stand against the opposite wall and hit the target." She looks down at Aurora, considers her for a moment before she says, "hold out your hand, Miss Black. You will be Victoria's motivation."

VICTORIA: Victoria's eyes travel fast, from her barely conscious girlfriend to her mother. She's watching, almost frozen. Her whole body preparing for fight when Aurora wakes up in shock and panic, furious and terrified. "Mom..." At first she starts as though she intends to be reasonable, but then she steps forward, closer to her mother and Aurora like she might get between them. Victoria doesn't even look toward the shelf or the blindfold or the game. "Get away from her." A fireball ignites in her hand. "Mom, I'm not doing this."(edited)

BRIGID: Brigid shakes her head in disappointment as fire swirls over Victoria's palm. "Truly, Victoria? You lose your control this easily?" Her boot flattens on the chain at Aurora's wrist, pinning it tight. With one gloved hand, she pulls her sleeve back and grips her arm tight at elbow. With the other, she tips the glass bottle at a slight angle, letting a slow drip of himalayan salt water drip from the opening. Drip. Drip. Drip. The drops track down Aurora's forearm as Brigid keeps her gaze on her daughter. "Begin, Victoria."

AURORA: She can tell what's about to happen. Its a test, just like the one Brigid had put Victoria up to in the forest the day she had found her not far from the property, except this time, Brigid takes it a step further by putting her in the line of fire. She's stronger, stronger than Aurora and without her magic, she can't push her away when she pins her wrist between her fingers. She tries to jerk away. "What are you doing?" And she knows, immediately when she sees the water drip from the water and onto her skin. "Victoria don--". The burn is like a hot iron cast against her arm, leaving a scarce trail of vapor as it leaves her skin aching. Aurora's breath catches in her throat and her fingers twitch from the pain. She tries to hold it in, for Victoria's sake, but the screech comes out through her teeth.

VICTORIA: "Mom, no! " It comes out fast, sharp, entirely sudden and loud and completely not in the control Brigid wants. Victoria doesn't hesitate either. She doesn't begin. She doesn't play along. She hears the pained sound Aurora makes and releases the fireball she holds without a second of further hesitation, aimed square for Brigid's chest. "I said get away from her."

BRIGID: Releasing the vial from her grip, Brigid brings her palms up, swiping fast and hard to the side to dismiss her daughter's fierce fireball. Disappointment and fury war in the boiling rumble of her bloodstream, her snarl turned toward Victoria. "How dare you ----- " With one foot swiping at the ash, her magic reaches out, slipping into the circle before Aurora has a chance to reach out. With the heat of her anger, she sends a strong shockwave along Aurora's limbs, a prolonged shock of the jolts she'd sent Victoria before, and watches as the helpless blonde that her daughter has come to care for so much, has become so weak over, twitches and writhes where she's bound.

VICTORIA: Neither she or her mother could have known that that was going to be Brigid's last chance. But the moment that Victoria sees her mother's magic shock Aurora, her whole body spirals into a fury. Faster than before, harder than before. The rhythms of the universe in complete discord instead of her usual balance with them. It's messy, when she throws a small shock her own at her mother, and then another ball of fire, clearing the distance between them in seconds before she takes Brigid by the shoulders and all but throws her to the ground, separating the magical grip she has on Aurora and landing on top of her in one motion, not remotely fluid or graceful but animal, furious, filled with fire and anger that comes from the darkest parts of Victoria's eyes. She can only remember being this mad one other time and even then it's a blur. It's a blur now. A knee lands in Brigid's ribs, Victoria hits her, hard in the face, landing her other elbow against Brigid's throat. "How dare I?" It barely sounds like her voice. "How dare you. She's my fiancee. She's innocent she's an original witch, She's mine -- " Victoria doesn't know what she was going to say but all she can feel is rage and that boils over, guttural and furious. She holds her arm against her mother's throat even harder, hits her again, but this time with magic in her fist. "Of course I'm weak. Of course I"m out of control. I've always been out of control! That's why you hate me so much, isn't it?" Everything pours out of her and Victoria can't even see anymore. She grabs Brigid by her shoulders, slams the back of her against the floor again. "I'm not you. I'm never going to be you and I'm -- I never want to be you. Because she's -- I love her. And you're a monster!"

DERRICK: Its a strange thing, to feel something when the witch you're bonded to does; its never the same. Sadness doesn't translate to sadness, excitement doesn't translate to excitement, and fury certainly doesn't either. Its something, a feeling of dread, that something is wrong. She'd told him not to intervene; when she was with her mother he didn't have to step in, but there's something different about this, something that makes him stand from his outpost, leaving another one of the wolves in charge. He can't help it, he doesn't even know where Victoria is but suddenly he's running straight towards the barn, faster, and faster, and faster -- he breaks the branches as he swiftly makes his way through. They break his skin but not enough to hurt. Until he's there, until he swings the barn doors open as hard as he can and he sees it. Aurora Black motionless against the chains, looking like she's trying to gasp for air, and Victoria carrying animalistic fury, on top of her mother. I love her and you're a monster! It takes him a second to understand what had just happened. "Victoria!" It might be the first time he's used her name without a title in front of Brigid Devereaux, but there's no time to apologize. "Stop, stop! You're going to kill her!" That's when he grabs her by the waist, pulls Victoria off her mother with all his strength, keeping a steady grip on her. It would take an inhuman amount of strength to get out of it. Derrick pulls her back, drags her until he creates safe distance between them. He watches Aurora look up from the veil of her hair, her body trembles; he thinks she's crying, but he can't tell from this distance. "What the hell is going on here?"

BRIGID: Her face throbs. Her neck feels pinched, too tight, and her chest burns for air. She'd swear on her death bed that she had seen it, that hint of gold, that's wolf's touch in her daughter's eyes and when Brigid is able to push herself up to sitting, her lungs gasping to catch a breath, she isn't able to hide the fact that her fingers are trembling. "----Get them both to the house," she manages, through her words are harsh, each vibration rasping over the chords in her throat. She tries to clear it, almost winces, swallows instead and tastes the blood pooling in her cheek spread thick and heavy over the back of her tongue. "No one sees them," she adds, forcing out the words. "Now."

DERRICK: "Yes ma'am". He has no choice but to follow Brigid's orders; he had considered the way his loyalty would shift, the way it would be molded and changed, how Brigid Devereaux is the one mangled and beaten and all he wonders is if Victoria's okay. But he doesn't say anything, instead, he slowly lets go of Victoria, and takes a careful step towards Aurora, still in chains. Derrick looks back to make sure Victoria won't make further moves to hurt her mother, and once convinced he won't have to stop another attempted murder, he brushes the circle of ash around Aurora aside, noticing the part Brigid must have opened to make Aurora collapse like this. He undoes the shackles and Aurora's knees buckle, falling on the ground on her knees. Derrick's arms are around her when Aurora's knees give in. She tries to move when he sweeps her off the ground, surely searching for Victoria. He sees the way her eyes move, as if she's expecting Victoria to be the one to carry her, but when she grips his shirt (with barely enough strength to close her fingertips around it), he walks straight towards her. Aurora lets her arm go limp and he notices she's reaching out for Victoria once he's standing in front of her. He presses his lips together and he thinks the look he gives her is enough of a tell, so he nods towards the barn door.

[three-houses-text-files]

bernadetta/edelgard

c-a support + paired ending

c

Edelgard: … Bernadetta: … E: Bernadetta, why are you following me? B: Ah! Um... E: You were following me quite conspicuously, so why attempt to hide now? B: I… Um... E: Um? B: Ah! Please don't hurt me! E: Calm yourself. I have no reason to harm you. B: Forgive me! I beg you! I'll go straight back to my room and you'll never see me again. I swear! E: Bernadetta. B: Yes, Lady Edelgard. E: Please explain why you were following me, and why you tried to hide. B: Is Her Highness saying she will not condemn me? (pre-skip) B: Is Her Majesty saying she will not condemn me? (post-skip) E: Please speak like the human that you are. I already said no harm will come to you. B: Yes. Yes, I'm sorry. Um, permit me to explain. B: Lady Edelgard, you are fearless. I look up to you as an example to follow. E: And that explains it...how? B: I decided to watch you from a distance, to learn from you. But your presence is, um...intimidating. B: I got more and more scared until I finally couldn't help but try to hide! Ah, forgive me. I throw myself upon your mercy! E: Honestly. E: Look, nobody is truly fearless. Even I have things that I'm afraid of. B: What? You do? E: You seem oddly overjoyed at the thought. B: N-no, of course not! But, um, what in the world could possibly frighten you? E: The sea. I find the pitch black of the open sea at night quite frightening. E: I can't swim, so if the sea were to wash me away, I fear I would never return. B: The sea? I think I may have seen it once. Maybe... B: I didn't know you couldn't swim. That's a surprise. (pre-paralogue) B: Oh, the sea. I actually snuck out to swim in it once when I visited Brigid. B: I’m surprised to hear you can't swim, Lady Edelgard. (post-paralogue) E: Again, my shortcomings delight you. Everyone has fears, as well as things they can't do. How many times must I tell you? B: Ah! I really did make you angry!

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b

E: Bernadetta. B: Ah! Lady Edelgard! Wh-what can I do for you? E: I appreciate all the effort you're making to overcome your fear of me. E: Your dedication is commendable. However... B: I’m just getting in your way, aren't I? B: Knew it, Bernie. You're just an intruder. Nobody wants you around! Stupid! Oh... E: Bernadetta! B: Yes! E: The problem you keep running into is that you don't listen to what people are really saying. E: That's why your efforts are in vain. You need to listen instead of jumping to your own conclusions. B: … E: Are you...listening to me? B: Yes! E: Then why aren't you responding? B: Um… I wanted to listen until you were finished. Ah, sorry! Were you finished then? E: I was. B: Then, may I please scream now? E: By all means. But please try to make it a fairly quiet one. B: Just a tiny one. E: ... B: Um, wait. What was I upset about, again? B: That’s weird. I forgot why I was about to scream, and now I don't even need to. What a nice feeling! E: You're trying your best. I know that. But even so— B: B-but what? What'd I do this time? I'm so sorry! Whatever it is! I'll go to my room and never bother you again! E: Wait, you didn't let me finish! I was only going to say that— B: Aaaah!

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a

B: Gardening with you is a lot of fun, Lady Edelgard! E: I feel the same. You know so much about it, Bernadetta. B: I looked after flowers a lot back home. I like them. B: They don't talk... They don't get angry... They don't hit you. And they're sweet. E: They are sweet. Unlike people, they can all be trusted on sight. B: You’re sweet too, Lady Edelgard! I mean—not sweet, but, um... You know what I mean. B: You can talk or even get angry all you want... E: Well, I'll strive to avoid getting angry. B: You’re really kind. I'm less scared of you than I used to be. B: Most nobles are terrifying. I've had lots of bad experiences with them. B: But getting the chance to talk to you like this makes me glad I came to the monastery. E: I'm glad too. You made quite a few friends at the academy, didn't you? (bernadetta has supports with other people?) E: I'm glad too. (bernadetta doesn’t have supports with other people?) E: I had heard rumors about the reclusive daughter of House Varley, but you're nothing like I imagined. B: Rumors? About me?! Uh, just...pretend you didn't hear anything! E: Heh, there's no need to be embarrassed! Rumors are meaningless. All that matters is the truth. B: You’re right! I'm not really a recluse now anyway, not since I came to the monastery. B: I won't let the rumors bother me. E: I'm happy to hear it. Actually...I should thank you. B: Thank me? What for? B: Wait, do you mean you need to "thank" me for all the times I've made you mad?! You do, don't you?! E: That mind of yours—no! I mean the grateful sort of thanks. E: Before I met you, I was more prone to anger. But now I've changed in that regard. E: So thank you for that. Oh... I suppose you're not listening. B: Oh, I'm done for! Five years' worth of resentment is about to crash down on me all at once! Aaaah! E: It's OK, Bernadetta. E: I'm thanking you, not attacking you. B: Oh. Um... I jumped to conclusions again, didn't I? E: You did, yes. But don't worry about it. E: Enough talk, don't you think? Let's take care of these sweet little plants. B: Right! OK. Thank you! E: Bernadetta... I hope you'll keep spending time with me. B: Of course I will! Hey, look! This flower's just about ready to bloom. E: Ha! So it is! I can't wait to see its true colors...

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paired ending

When Bernadetta inherited House Varley from her father, she tried to withdraw from politics and remain within the bounds of her territory, but Edelgard, the new Adrestian emperor, would not allow it. Instead, she demanded that Bernadetta counsel her in governing Fódlan. It is said that the emperor made this choice to keep herself from being too detached, and that Bernadetta was all too happy to provide a more emotional perspective now and again. The people of Enbarr could always tell when the two were meeting by the sound of Bernadetta's panicked voice ringing out from the palace.

[douxreviews]

Cloak and Dagger - ‘Blue Note’ Review

"Make them ride the highs and lows with us until we all come out the other side, changed."

Dangit show, please don't make me feel bad for Lia. I refuse to feel bad for Lia.

OK, I feel a little bad for Lia.

This is a story about ascension.

They may have mentioned it a time or two. 'Power up.' 'Get to the next level.' 'Run the scale until you get to the top.' You know, the occasional subtle hint.

In which case, it's probably germane to start the discussion with the title. Forgive me in advance if you're a proper student of Jazz as a form. I'm personally not, as you'll see in just a moment. I apologize for the grotesque oversimplification that follows.

A blue note, in jazz, is 'a minor interval where a major is expected. A note played at a slightly different pitch.' The upshot is that after running a musical scale, instead of playing the expected major finish to the scale you play a different note. A 'blue' note. Typically a variant of the expected major off by somewhere between a semitone and a quartertone.

That feels like an accurate and specific description of Andre's ascension into becoming a Loa, almost certainly intentionally. He's ascending and it's going to end up slightly darker and 'off.'  It helps that Andre himself is specifically underlining the metaphor right from the very first scene of the episode. Ninety-six months before the current events, Andre and his band were about to play a show that was intended to make their name in the music world. Andre specifically refers to the LPs of the jazz greats in the bin at the record studio as 'the gods.'  Further, he clearly states that it's his intention to become one of them through playing his performance. Through running the scale up to the blue note, he intends to become one of the gods. You just cannot state a thematic metaphor more directly than that.

Sadly for Andre, that's the night of his first migraine, which brings the show, and his career, crashing down around him. That's right, a good chunk of this week's episode is devoted to Andre's secret origin.

The timing for this background information isn't terrible, although it does feel a little bit like we're turning our wheels waiting for the big final confrontation. Fortunately they get away with it for a few different reasons. The primary one being the performance of Brooklyn McLinn as Andre. Despite the truly terrible things that we've seen Andre do, and the terrible things he continues to do in this episode, it's impossible not to feel for him during the scenes of his attempted suicide. That's not easy to do, as the scenes are solo and completely without dialogue. The only thing that doesn't really work about the flashback sequences, and it's a minor thing, is the way his migraines are timed to onset with his attempt to hit the blue note. There's an unpleasant aspect of 'you flew too close to the sun' about it that seems to almost be blaming Andre for his own migraines, as if they were caused by his own hubris. That struck an unpleasant note for me, no pun intended.

Another aspect of the structure that made the flashbacks not feel like they were just wasting time is that by devoting a little time to telling Andre's backstory they could simultaneously use that time to clear up a few extraneous plot threads before next week's finale. So Tandy and Mayhem track down Lia's body, while Ty goes to resolve that 'gangs want him dead' issue that's still lingering on the periphery.

I have to say, Ty's 'negotiation' techniques with the gang leaders were just wonderful. I honestly thought he'd let the one die when he threw him off the roof. Good on Ty for knowing how to use his powers to the best effect by this point, and for knowing that he can't really do anything about people buying drugs for themselves. So he focused on what he could, and now the gangs of New Orleans know better than to try to sell drugs which will be used in human trafficking. That was a good resolution to that thread. Obviously in a comic book show you can't have your characters magically 'fix' something as genuinely awful as human trafficking without coming across as crass. This was a good way to show Ty making a difference without crossing a line into something distasteful. Well judged.

Meanwhile, Tandy and Mayhem hash out whether extra-judicial murder is ever justified by the expedience of Tandy believing it is, then looking into the soul of someone who seems truly irredeemable and learning to see their humanity. Mayhem was a good foil for that particular character journey, and neither the character nor the journey outstayed its welcome.

Which brings me neatly back to the last reason that the structure of Andre's flashbacks didn't feel like a waste of time. They used our assumptions about how flashbacks work to pull an impressive rug-pull and have Andre of today's plot suddenly dovetail and interact with the Andre of seven-ish years ago's plot. Apparently, Andre of today sensed Lia being given back her hope and reached out into her despair space of seven years ago and stopped Tandy from giving her hope back to her.

Notice that the above paragraph, when written down starkly like that, sounds absolutely 100% bat-sh*t crazy and does not make a lick of logical sense. But in the episode it makes perfect aesthetic sense, and I've never seen a flashback structure used in that way before, which makes me love it. Who needs logic when you have visual poetry.

So, after giving us some backstory and cleaning up some side plots, the episode arrives at the only tangible thing that you can point to and say really 'happened' this week, if you're just looking at it in terms of pure plot progress. Andre has summoned all the girls he's 'infected' with despair to the sight of that fatal jazz performance and played the blue note, successfully 'leveling up' and getting through the locked door in his despair dimension. Cue next week's climactic battle.

It shouldn't all hang together and feel like one complete piece, but it does without question, and it's all down to the expert application of that ascension theme we started this discussion with. If I was going to compare the plot structure to music, I would call it jazz. Really, good jazz.

Bits and Pieces:

-- Very cool combination trick of Tandy throwing the light knife into Ty who teleported to where it needed to be released. Too bad it was just a little too late.

-- Andre's veve lines lighting up looked a lot like he was finding cell reception.

-- Nice little seed early on of showing Melissa Bowen's records in Andre's record store of despair.

-- I actually believed that Tandy was trying to protect Loa from waking up in an ambulance with strange men after what she'd been through. That was a clever ruse.

-- I feel like we were denied a very interesting conversation of Ty finding out that Evita got god-married.

-- Ty teleporting does not interrupt his cell reception or drop any call he happens to be on at the time. That's suspiciously dependable cell service.

-- I suspect that they showed Adina burning the bloody newspapers both as a way for Ty to understand that she'd murdered Connors and to tell the viewers, 'No, we're not faking you out, she totally killed him for real.'

-- Will Brigid get a turn at being in control of her hybrid body after the crisis is over?

-- It was a little awkward having people suddenly vanishing as a plot point what with the snap still being theoretically a thing. I'm not sure where exactly this season of Cloak & Dagger fits in relation to Infinity War, but it definitely made me second guess if that was related to what happened.

-- Tandy's plan of borrowing younger-Lia's hope in the form of sheet music and giving it to older Lia in order to give her hope back was a really elegant plan. On most shows that would have worked.

-- “Luke Cage in Harlem rumble” by Karen Page. That entire scene with Solomon is why representation is so important. Luke Cage is a hero that looks like him and because of that he inspires him to try to be better. That. That's why representation matters. Every kid deserves to see themselves in their heroes.

-- When Ty or Tandy touch someone they go into that person's 'realm' for lack of a better world. When Andre touches someone he pulls them into his. That feels like an important distinction.

Quotes:

Tandy: "Tyrone, if you ask me about my feelings one more time I’m seriously gonna kill you."

Tandy: "Brigid was a better liar." Mayhem: "Yeah, well that’s about all she was better at."

Soloman: "Sometimes you can’t fix things. Some things are just broke."

Ty: "Which one is she?" Tandy: "Both of them."

Tandy: "When all hope is gone, this is what’s left."

Tandy: "You can’t kill her. An hour ago you practically begged me not to hurt her." Mayhem: "An hour ago she had something I wanted."

A solid penultimate episode that got all of the necessary setup in place for what looks like to be an explosive finale.

Three out of four abandoned trumpets

Mikey Heinrich is, among other things, a freelance writer, volunteer firefighter, and roughly 78% water.

[brigid-faye]

I know wanting more time to write fics isn’t the best reason to want the fall of capitalism but

[phynxrizng]

WHAT IS IMBOLC

All about Imbolc SOURCE, CLADDAGH DESIGN.COM by Claddagh Design on Jan 19, 2017 @ 9:26 pm in Special Days Imbolc, or Imbolg, is one of the lesser known festivals of the ancient Celts, but it was one of the four most important festivals in the Celtic calendar. For this ancient society, the year revolved around two main points; on the one hand, since the Celts were an agricultural society, everything was based around the harvest. On the other hand, they also had an in-depth knowledge about the alignment of the sun and stars, which history suggests had great significance for them. So their calendar was neatly divided up into four quarters, with a festival to celebrate reaching each one. The year started with Samhain at the end of October, when the harvest was in full swing, to prepare for the onset of winter. In Celtic philosophy, light must always follow dark, so this is why their year began on such a sombre note. Bealtaine at the beginning of May marked the coming of summer, the beginning of sowing crops, and the light half of the year, and was the biggest and happiest celebration. In between were Lughnasa in August, marking the beginning of the harvest, and Imbolc in February, to celebrate the beginning of spring. What was Imbolc about? Simply put, Imbolc was a celebration of the end of winter, and the impending light half of the year. The hardest part of the year was over; adverse weather, cold temperatures, food rationing, and of course, no warfare (an integral part of Celtic society) would soon be a thing of the past. Farmers were getting ready to go back to work, preparing animals for breeding, warriors were picking up their weapons again, and the political and social aspects of life that had been put on hold for winter were also beginning again. The name Imbolc originates from ‘i mbolg’, which translates as ‘in the belly’. This refers to livestock breeding season, particularly the pregnancy of ewes, which was one of the focal points of the celebration. Because the festival was so associated with this, its timing often varied – it could be anywhere from mid-January to mid- February depending on the weather and the animals’ behaviour. It also appeared to have a more spiritual significance for the Celts too, as it’s no coincidence that more than a few megalithic monuments around Ireland are perfectly aligned with the rising sun around the dates of Imbolc and Samhain. Imbolc was celebrated all across Ireland, Scotland, and the Isle of Man, with each region having slightly different variations in name and customs. Wales also had a remarkably similar version of the festival known as Gwyl Fair y Canhwyllau. After the onset of Christianity in Ireland, the festival was tied in with a celebration of Saint Bridget, and transformed from a pagan one into a Christian one. Christians used Brigid as the focal point of their celebrations to smooth the transition, as Imbolc had previously been associated with a goddess of a very similar name, Brighid. Essentially, Bridget and Brighid were the same woman! As with all Celtic festivals, Imbolc involved a host of unique customs and rituals to welcome the spring, say farewell to the winter, ward against evil and promote health and wellbeing. What happened during Imbolc? Imbolc was similar to Samhain and Bealtaine in that fire played an integral part of the celebrations, although not on the same scale. While at Samhain bonfires were lit to ward off evil spirits and at Bealtaine they served to offer protection and growth, at Imbolc they were symbolic of the sun’s return. Rather than a huge central bonfire at the centre of the festivities, Imbolc was more about the home and each home’s hearth. Every home in the community would have their own fire burning right through the night, and during medieval times when homes consisted of actual wood and stone buildings rather than the wattle and daub huts of the Celts, all of the fires in the house were lit for the night. If for some reason that was not possible, it was sufficient to have candles lit in every room instead. The Celts were always concerned about the weather (something that has lasted up until the present day with modern Irish people!), so Imbolc was an important time to read omens and attempt to predict the weather for the summer. An unusual but widely popular omen was if the weather was especially bad on the day of Imbolc, which meant a great summer was on the way. This is because one of the more malicious creatures in Irish folklore, the Cailleach, would spend the day of Imbolc collecting firewood for herself if winter was to last a while longer. To do this, she would obviously need a bright and dry day to collect her wood, so if Imbolc was wet and windy, that meant the Cailleach had gone to sleep and winter would soon be over. Visiting wells was another important custom for Imbolc, particularly holy wells. Visitors would walk around the well in the same direction as the sun traversed the sky at that point on the land, praying for health and wealth for the year. Offerings were left at the well once this was done; usually coins or ‘clooties’ (pieces of cloth). Special foods were also part of the festivities, usually consisiting of bannock – a flat bread cut into wedges – as well as dairy products and meat. Saint Bridget and Imbolc The early Celtic version of Imbolc was not all that different from the festival in early medieval times, when Christianity was taking hold in Ireland. One of the goddesses the Celts worshipped at this festival was Bhrigid, the daughter of Dagda (the chief Celtic deity) and one of the Tuatha De Dannan, the first inhabitants of Ireland. She is associated with many things, most significantly poetry and fertility, but such activities as healing, smithing, arts and crafts, tending to livestock and serpents also make the cut. She is credited with creating a whistle for people to call to one another through the night. Some legends claim that while one half of her face was beautiful, the other was horribly ugly. She is thought by many to be the Celtic equivalent of the Roman goddess Minerva and the Greek goddess Athena. Saint Bridget, on the other hand, was not a mythical goddess but a real woman, born in Dundalk, county Louth, around the 5th century AD. During her lifetime she became a nun, founded numerous monasteries and performed her fair share of miracles, becoming one of the foremost advocates of Christianity in Ireland. After her death, she was made one of Ireland’s patron saints (and the only female patron saint), along with Patrick and Columba. So it was a natural progression for Imbolc, the pagan festival worshipping the goddess Bhrigid, to become the Christian festival in honour of Saint Bridget. February 2nd was chosen as the permanent day of celebration. For the Celts, Bhrigid represented the all important light half of the year, so her presence was much revered during the festival. On Imbolc eve, it was claimed that she would visit the most virtuous homes and bless everyone who slept in them, so people would leave pieces of clothing, food, or other tokens outside the entrance for her to bless, or to entice her into the home, It was Bhrigid’s role as a fertility goddess that was most important here, but for the medieval people of Ireland, her healing powers and general protective sense were as important as well as her fertility. The majority of Imbolc traditions regarding Bhrigid or Bridget come from this time. While the tradition of leaving small tributes to Bridget on the doorstep continued for several centuries, several others sprang up too. Ashes from the fire that was left to burn all night long would be smoothed out and left to see if a mark from Bridget appeared, ro confirm that she had visited the house. Sometimes a makeshift bed would even be made up next to the fire, in case the saint wanted to rest a while. This tradition was particularly popular in the Isle of Man and Scotland, where there were several short rhymes to go along with the tradition, acting as a call to the Saint to come and visit – generally, they were some variation on the phrase ‘Bridget, come in to our home, your bed is ready’. In some areas across Ireland and Scotland, women played a very important part in the festivities. They would make a doll figure from rushes known as a ‘Brideog’, dress it in white and with flowers, and carry it in a procession while singing hymns and poems in honour of Bridget. At every home they passed, they would receive more pieces of cloth or small bits of food for the Brideog. Once the procession was finished, they would place the Brideog in a seat of honour and have a feast with all of the food, before placing it in a bed for the night while they began celebrations. The most well known tradition however, and one that is still practiced today, is making a Saint Bridget’s cross and hanging it in the home. These crosses were a unique symbol of the transition from Paganism to Christianity. Before, bunches of rushes were tied together and hung at the entrance to homes to welcome Bhrigid. One of the stories of Bridget’s lifetime however recounts how she wove a cross from rushes and placed it above a dying man’s bed. He roused from his delirium to ask what she was doing, and on hearing what it meant, he asked to be baptised before his death. Since then, the cross has been a symbol for Bridget, and was also a familiar symbol for the Celts, making it the perfect transition symbol for Imbolc. The cross is distinctive, with a square in the middle and each point of the cross placed at a corner of the square. Somewhere between then and now, placing a cross in your kitchen came to mean that your house would be protected from fire, Imbolc today Unlike Samhain, which transformed into the much loved night of Halloween, Imbolc is one Celtic festival that hasn’t quite survived through history. Although Christians still celebrate St. Bridget’s Day in Ireland and children still learn how to make crosses at the start of February, little else remains of the ancient Celtic spring festival. However, Saint Bridget’s cross, made from rushes and hung around the home just as the Celts would have done, is as good a reminder as any to the festival’s ancient and mythological origins. REPOSTED BY, PHYNXRIZNG

[willreadforbooze]

Hello!

Here’s our weekly wrap up from the WRFB crew =)

Sam’s Updates

I had such a good (but busy) week. It’s going to be crazy few weeks but I’m excited. If I do this right, it’ll be really good for me. I also got to see my two best friends from college this weekend and it was THE BEST.

What I read this week:

Grace and Fury by Tracy Banghart: This is a YA story about a world where women have like… zero rights. Our main character has been selected to be a “Grace” which I’m assuming is like a harem for the heir to the throne. Linz wrote a review for this when it came out. This book was ok. I predicted how it would end for the most part. I’ll keep going with the series but yeah.

Radical Candor: Be a Kickass Boss Without Losing Your Humanity by Kim Malone Scott: This is a leadership book that my boss recommended for me. I’m the type of person that always says what I mean and I never lie. You can see how being a boss with this quality can be sensitive. This book helps harness that honesty into providing the best feedback for your team and how to help them (and you) be your best selves.

What I’m currently reading:

  Wild Beauty by Anna-Marie McLemore: So this is a story of a family that always has 5 girls, 5 cousins. The men that spawn these women disappear, so it’s always the women. 5 ladies, 5 mothers, 5 Grandmas (abuelas), when suddenly a boy appears. He has no memories. So look, I’m reading this on my phone and I was worried that I wouldn’t reach for it. I WAS WRONG. I am loving this.

Starless Sea by Erin Morgenstern: So this is where I would normally tell you what this book is about, but IM NOT GONNA. It’s so much better to go into Erin’s books blind and I’m not going to ruin that. What I WILL say is it’s got a giant (as in world size) library. I am loving this so much.

The Broken Kingdoms by N.K. Jemisin: This is the second book in the Inheritance series. Parker wrote a hilarious review. I didn’t love the first one as much as Broken Kingdoms but this story is about a different character and I’m enjoying that. Listening on audio.

Linz’s Updates

I’ve spent all week trying to shake Oktoberfest jet lag and also there was work gross. BUT it’s a holiday weekend for moi, so I’m gonna do nothing but read Monday. And meal prep. And laundry. And maybe finally celebrate my wedding anniversary?

What Linz read:

The Book of Lost Saints by Daniel Jose Older: An advanced copy of this contemporary adult novel fell into my lap at ALA and ummmmmmmm IT’S AMAZING. I’ve never actually read anything by Older (I can’t with urban fantasy), so this was my first time reading his work and I adored it. Will be writing a review soon, book comes out Nov. 5 (so not long to wait!).

A Curse So Dark and Lonely by Brigid Kemmerer: I mostly read this because we got a copy of book 2 from ALA…but I’m not sure if I’m gonna read it. This kind-of retelling of Beauty and the Beast is…fine? There are some aspects I really liked, and Kemmerer’s writing is pretty good, but I dunno, there were some issues I couldn’t get past. (BTW Sam’s review here.)

What Linz didn’t finish:

Five Dark Fates by Kendare Blake: The fourth and dear god hopefully last book in the Three Dark Crowns series. Technically this hit my DNF list while coming back from Munich, but I needed a way to bring this up–LET A TRILOGY BE A TRILOGY. Adding more books completely ruins the flow and now I’m completely turned off on a series that I would have been ride or die for. (I’m gonna assume it was an editorial staff decision and direct all my rage at the publisher.)  It didn’t work here, and I’ll say it, it reaaaaaally didn’t work for the Throne of Glass series. You want authors to write more books in the universe? LET THEM DO THAT. Look at Cinda Williams Chima. (Editor’s Note: GIRL, I HEAR YOU)

What Linz is currently reading:

Sisters of Shadow and Light by Sara B. Larson: Thanks to Netgalley for the advanced copy! This also comes out Nov. 5. Two sisters have been trapped inside the Citadel of the Paladins with their mom for 15 years (hold, this isn’t a horror story), until a stranger manages to get in and change everything. I’m saving all thoughts for the review.

Minda’s Updates

I’ve been in Columbus (my hometown) all weekend, with my wonderful mother hosting our family baby shower. So, you know, feeling incredibly grateful with a small heaping of guilt that I don’t see them more.

What Minda finished:

Gods of Jade and Shadow by Silvia Moreno-Garcia – This is our book club read for next month. The story is set in 1920’s Mexico following Casiopea, a Cinderella-type person. Her life changes when she finds her fate tied to that of the Mayan god of death. 3/5 shots, review to come!

What Minda is reading now:

These Divided Shores (Stream Raiders #2) by Sara Raasch – From the author of Snow Like Ashes, this new series focuses on the island nation of Grace Loray as it is attempted to be taken over by the pious mainland. The magic of the series is plant-based, which I just find fascinating. I’m about 60% of the way done. So far so good, except for the small child I complained about in my review of the first one, These Rebel Waves (link), too.

HEIST by Kezzy Sparks – A debut magic-based paranormal suspense novel, out Oct 31. To my understanding, the story focuses on witch-hunter and wizardess Mel who is on the case for a genital-stealing witch. Sounds bonkers, right? I can’t wait.

Ginny’s Updates:

Whatsup. This has been a fucking exciting week and I am emotionally exhausted so now lets talk about the emotionless topic of books (hahahaha I have so many feelings about books). I am so very tired if that wasn’t obvious.

Currently Reading:

Laughter at the Academy by Seanan McGuire: Get ready for this, this was a week of a lot of Seanan McGuire. This is a book of short stories McGuire has written of the course of her career. there are some things from early on and some more recent, but they’re all pretty darn spooky or hit you right in the feels which makes this perfect for it Halloween release (I think?). I find myself taking a few minutes at least between stories so that I can process which is not a normal thing for me.

Finished:

Tempest by Beverly Jenkins: Third book in the Old West series, and I think it’s pretty safe to say this was my favorite of the series. Regan is a ton of fun (also a more modern thinker than most of hte people in her times) but this book features an adorable daughter, a father who would do anything for said daughter, a few obviously evil characters but a really intriguing sense of place. 5/5

Ashes of Honor by Seanan McGuire: This is book six of the Toby Daye series. Toby is asked to do a favor for a friend which is never as simple as could be expected. This book is wild and there will be a review. So deal with a one line summary.

Bands of Mourning by Brandon Sanderson: It was lovingly suggested that I write a review for this so now that is the plan. This is the third book in the Wax and Wayne series in which Wax is supposed to get married except there’s an interruption and then he needs to hunt down an object of major power because given his track record clearly that will go smoothly… review to come.

Branded by Fire by Nalini Singh: As soon as these books come up from the library I’m going to read them. That’s not a question. #6 in the Psy-Changeling series, this book follows characters introduced in earlier books, Dorian (a changeling that cannot actually transform) and Ashaya (a Medical Psy who works on DNA level) are both snarky and sharp edged where need be and have amazing chemistry, need to find a way to stop the experiment the Psy had been running inadvertently putting Ashaya’s son in trouble while her psychotic twin sister hunts here down. Pretty exciting stuff. The characters in this book were more fully realized than in previous books and I’m really enjoying the way the plots build the world and already existing characters. 5/5

Until next time, we main forever drunkenly yours,

Sam, Ginny, Linz, and Minda

Weekly Wrap Up: Oct 6- 13, 2019 Hello! Here’s our weekly wrap up from the WRFB crew =) Sam's Updates I had such a good (but busy) week.

[violetsystems]

#personal

I definitely didn’t have any more threats this week other than the risks I take running so much in this heat.  I was reading earlier about Jun Takahashi from Undercover and how he conceived this collaboration with Nike.  They all just wanted to test out things that were comfortable to run in around Yoyogi park.  Apparently running around the park five times is an even 10k.  I’ve been doing about 13k before work some days.  It doesn’t leave a lot of room for negative emotions at all.  Jun says something in this interview about how “It’s always just step-by-step. The same for work or for running. Just keep going forward and believe.”  Belief is a strange thing sometimes.  If you believe you are going in the right direction and you take those steps, you’ll most surely get to wherever you are going.  Fear will cause you to lose faith in that belief.  Fear of the unknown.  Fear of popular opinion.  Fear of giving up on something and starting again.  Sometimes your vision can be skewed or clouded by other opinions, peer pressure, or just your life spiraling out of your personal control.  I quit drinking back in December.  I don’t really have any interest in going back to it.  We all can theorize how much weed I probably smoke.  I would tell you straight to your face that’s none of your business and smile.  I still manage to run all these miles and believe enough to stay positive and work on myself and my dreams.  It’s hard sometimes to balance but I do it myself.  DIY.  I stayed in this week and opted out of a game down the street.  Too many people I didn’t really know.  Didn’t feel obligated to be social.  Mind you footwork people drop by my house all the time just to say hey.  Somebody a couple of weeks ago was talking about feeling overwhelmed by the lack of genuine people in real life.  I’m a very sociable person when I can be.  Sometimes I’m overwhelmed by all these things I do for myself to keep believing in what I believe.  It’s what keeps me going and week after week I reflect on how I grow from what I choose to believe.  I prioritize the things that matter in my life visible or otherwise.

I don’t believe in any crazy stuff mind you.  At least that’s what I tell myself sometimes to make the headache go away.  But I do believe it’s worth it for me to focus my attention.  And there are way too many distractions sometimes out there and I know better.  People like to think I don’t but I sleep pretty well at night regardless.  For years, people would sort of neg me if I spoke out loud about things I believed might be possible.  I’d have an idea and somebody who was a friend would immediately strike it down as crazy or irrational.   Pretty rough to get gaslighted by people you trust as friends.  I stopped including people like that in my life.  It was too much effort to have to constantly prove my point through all the negativity and being talking down to.  I would rather just be alone.  It’s probably worse when no one is actually listening to a word you say.  But it’s easier to ignore and it’s less personal.  People who doubt their own actions sometimes project that onto you.  I find myself constantly pushing back and it’s exhausting socially.  I’m lucky to work in a very challenging atmosphere artistically.  There are things I need to understand.  Boundaries and respect.  And I’ve grown to understand them in my own way but very attentive to nuance.  But that’s work.  A job I go to and spend forty or so hours of my week fulfilling the requirements to get paid.  I enjoy it but then I leave campus.  And I have a personal life.  And an apartment I can shut the door to, water my plants, play fighting games and go to sleep.  I posted that Donald Duck Kingdom Hearts panel the other day and I can’t stop thinking about boundaries.  How people for years didn’t respect them in this city.  How nothing really has changed, I’ve just gotten stronger and much clearer at expressing what I want for myself and my future.  I’ve done a lot for people.  Tried to help friends.  And these days it’s all just to be seen.  People nod but don’t comprehend.  Nobody really actually communicates and therefore there isn’t much hope of a connection.  It’s easy to know when someone is listening.  And from there it’s easy to believe enough to give it time to grow to be true.  It’s been six months since I started running.  I’m still running. 

Sure Donald Duck may have inadvertently led me to some logic about staying out of local affairs.  I’ve been reading a lot of comics lately that I already own.  There’s a panel from Longshot that I’m almost finished reading where he’s lamenting about knowing too much.  He’s tried to help everyone because it’s in his nature being so lucky and all when he follows the purest course of action.  He’s trying to remember who he is through the people’s perceptions of him around him.  But he meets this girl who is attracted by this trope of him being a man without a past.  The writer of that comic is Ann Nocenti.  Recently I was reading about Prada enlisting Brigid Elva’s illustrations for their spring and summer campaign. Comics and animation have always been a huge part of my life.  It’s only recently getting back into them that I’ve realized that a lot of people are so lost in the art of theoretical discourse.  Everybody is either arguing or getting ready to roast or punk someone.  If you end up trying to play the game to get noticed here, you have to work extra hard for little or no real respect.   You’d think people would know better by now.  But nobody pays attention because they think you aren’t worth their time.  My friends are finishing up their tour in Hong Kong tomorrow.  I spoke with my cousin and made a decision the other day to go back around January or February.  I want to possibly visit Shanghai at some point on that trip too.  I have a history here that people have largely ignored for years.  I ran pretty much the entire summer.  I had no real validation other than belief.  Belief that somebody might respect me trying to be a real human being.  Try to be a better person.  Attempt to be healthier.  Let go of things in my past and reconcile them in my head.  Belief there is a different path away from all the fake bullshit we endure day after day.  I stay out of all these things because I believe there’s another path to something more worth my time.  It’s enough to keep me home writing again on a Friday.  I feel lucky to even have that to be honest.  The rest of my body after 13k doesn’t feel so blessed atm.  But at least we’re moving forward. <3 - Tim

[brigid-faye]

Hiyaaa for the WIP tag, #1 pls 🙏

hello love! and certainly, hmm... we'll go with a snippet?

Sirius’ heart stutters. 

He’s looking into the same tired, handsome face he saw this morning, the same warm brown curls tumbling over his forehead, slightly more disheveled and dusty than he was at dawn. He’s tall and on a horse and Sirius is standing on the ground, but he’s close enough that Sirius notices things he couldn’t see earlier - a smattering of freckles across his nose, gold flecks in his hazel eyes. 

Sirius has heard that the prince is handsome, of course he has, but he was expecting the aloof sort of handsome he sees in portraits of the king - beautiful, sure, but stern and cold. Instead he’s looking at this tired, kind, golden person who just sacked a guard for bullying Sirius and is apparently risking pissing off the king to free a bunch of commoners. 

Well, and who also stole Sirius’ horse. And who’s champion wanted to behead him. It’s confusing.

[brigid-faye]

about: me & my fics

hi! still sorta new here and thought this might make sense. A series of answers to questions I've received in various places

What do you write?

Harry Potter fanfiction, mostly Wolfstar, though i'll flirt with other pairings and eras very occasionally. I do a range of things; I tend to focus on healing, growth, redemption arcs, etc.. I only post on ao3, you can find my stuff here: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BrigidFaye

How did you get into fanfiction?

Originally by being a sad teenager in 2004. (You will make my day if you remember HPANA.) More recently, I was stressed by World Events a few years ago and dove into TikTok and thought I might as well check out ATYD since everyone was talking about it. And here we are.

Can I bind a copy of your fic?

For your own personal use or as a gift to a close friend where no money is exchanged - yes, I'm flattered! Please let me know and share some pictures with me, I'd love to see them. Otherwise - no. Selling fanfics for profit is illegal; doing so endangers this for everyone.

How old are you?

Mid 30s.

Are you ever going to write BLANK? When will you be updating?

Possibly and idk! I try really hard to keep this a fun hobby that isn't causing me stress, so I don't set myself deadlines. I've written myself into corners a million times, so I try to have things 90% finished before I start posting. This space can be a mess, but I love the community I've made through it, and I really appreciate everyone who turns up when I do get around to posting things, you mean the world to me <3

[brigid-faye]

hello! 🥰 for the WIP tag, I'd like to know more about the linny please 👀

hello! very much just a mental plot bunny but - one shot, canon compliant but EWE, maybe 10 years postwar, Ginny's on a traveling quidditch team and goes to a show and the lead singer looks familiar... 👀