#bonafide dopeness

[bonafidexdopeness]

William Conrad Erwin II (BXD™) | Brother Ben X | ESH® Full Color Portrait Work from The ESH® Portraiture Collection (Photoshop) | © 2023 EarnSomeHeight® #EarnSomeHeight #WilliamConradErwinII #CommissionsOpen #BonafidexDopeness #BonafideDopeness #HighPointNC #NoAI #BrotherBenX

[xxx-sir-pentious-xxx]

Trans Pentious getting their egg cracked (lol)

Pentious had pondered this fact, they could deny it no longer.

They didn't feel like a guy and she was wasting the potential for using her understanding of creating life to help herself.

She spent a handful of months to grow a vagina, making it custom and perfect for her unique body. Then came the process of surgery. She trusted her eggs, they could do it, even if she had to watch them carve her body and manually attach and fit everything.

Eventually the painkillers started to dull but she bit down on a leather glove holding herself together long enough to finish up. The wound was sterilized and wiped down before being wrapped and allowing her sinners natural healing ability to bond with the new set of genitalia.

It was like having a thousand hooks in her guts but sweet relief came once it was finished. She admired the craftsmanship and watched as it seamlessly closed after she tested the nerves. Yup bonafide woman material here. Sure not everyone needed to do a surgery, but why not just go for it if possible.

She looks at her chest now and considers if maybe she should add something to it but opted to just stuff a bra, she didnt want a bunch of heavy meat there getting in the way.

"I'm good enough... but I definitely feel like something is missing..."

She looked at her body and decided a nice red bow would bring it all together on her frills and tail. She tied them and adjusted the tail bow to go over her junk region before fluffing the bows and making sure they were bow side on her backside.

"I'm pretty~ I'm sooo pretty~♡"

She made a temporary bra to stuff just to give her a illusion of chest under her suit top.

"Mmm yes~♡ I look how to young people say, Delicious~♡"

She was feeling herself and her eggbois only hyped her up as they got her estrogen injections going while she was distracted and still a lil doped up on pain killers.

[dogboyboyshorts]

OK. im calling it Right Now. to replace the v2 fight in act 3′s first layer we’ll be fighting gabriel before he croaks and get one of HIS arms for the remainder of the game. maybe this would give us like… bonafide flying or maybe even his teleportation ability. “well then who are we going to fight in treachery?” literally no clue my friend. im pretty sure we’re gonna encounter the mechanics who’ve been turning husks and demons into cyborgs OH also wouldnt it be dope if we came upon an angel who’d been technologically altered too. that would be cool. 

[90363462]

5 Reasons Why Every Married Couple Needs A Sex Jar

Here's one of the funnest ways to save up a little cash. Guaranteed.

Shellie R. Warren

Oct. 15, 2018 06:48PM EST

This is one of those things I really wish I could take the credit for, but I can't. One day, while doing some research for a wedding article, I saw a "sex jar" on Pinterest. 

I read the fine print and the gist is this—every time a couple has sex, they agree to put some money into a big jar (or vase, jug or piggybank). It can be a quarter or $10, but something must go in there. Then, after six months to a year, the couple empties out the jar and uses the money to do something romantic. (Dope, right?)

Ever since I got hip to the sex jar concept, it's something that I incorporate into my marriage life coaching sessions. Now that I've got a few years of recommending sex jars under my belt, I've discovered a few other bonafide reasons for couples to invest in one. 

It's A Great "Sex Gauge".

Every couple is unique. This means that each one's sex life is going to be different. But if you're wondering how much sex is considered to be "healthy", there are plenty of articles that say if you're having sex once a week, you're actually doing pretty good.

So, what's the sign that you need a lil' more nookie in your life? I'll put it to you this way—20 million Americans are only having sex 10 times a year. Technically, that's what a "sexless marriage" is.

Since sex is great for your health (sperm included; I'm just sayin') and it's also one of the absolute best ways to bond with your partner, it's a good idea to not deprive yourself. A sex jar can help you to (literally) see if you are—or aren't.

It's One Of The Coolest Ways To Save Money.

I recently read that the average household has about $134,000 worth of debt (I also read 74 percent of engaged couples will take on debt in order to get married). Sometimes that's because couples don't have emergency funds or savings accounts that are strictly for vacations and second honeymoons.

If you and yours haven't gotten away in a while because funds are tight, peep this: Americans toss as much as—count it—$62 million in loose change every year. Every. Single. Year. By putting some of yours into your sex jar, not only is it a great way to tell how much sex you are having, it's also a fun way to hold onto your coins and save a little cash in the process too.

It Reminds Couples To Make Sex A (Top) Priority.

If you're someone who has a to-do list, tell me something. Is sex on it? If what you're about to say is you don't want to schedule sex because that doesn't seem very sexy, I hear you. I'll say two things about that, though.

img.buzzfeed.com

One, I promise you that scheduling it is better than not having it at all. And two, putting sex on your schedule can make the activity something that you look forward to during the week. Again, I am a marriage life coach but you don't have to take my word for it. There's a great read on this very topic here.

Just think. If you have a big ole sex jar in your bedroom and you walk past it every day, it's going to at least remind you to think of sex. And, the more we tend to think of something, the greater chance it has of becoming a priority (and for all of the reasons I've already shared, sex should always be a priority!).

It Reminds Couples To Make Romance A Top Priority Too

Question. How much romance is in your marriage? If that's too complex of a question, how about this one? When's the last time you and yours went on an actual date?(Picking up takeout or watching a movie on the couch does not qualify!)

media.giphy.com

If you know that romance is lacking but you haven't been able to make it happen because funds are tight, this is just one more reason to get yourself a sex jar. Just think—if you have sex three times a week and you each put $5 in the jar for every time that you do, you'll have $30 a week/$120 a month to spend on going on a real date. (This sex jar thing is just getting better and better isn't it?)

It's An Awesome Gift To Give To Your Other Married Friends

As long as you have friends, there are going to be occasions when you'll need to get them a present. A sex jar is the kind of gift that keeps on giving! 

All you've got to do is go to a local arts and crafts store, get a big jar and (if you want) decorate it. Then attach a note that explains what it's for—maybe something along the lines of "Here's a piggy bank for all of the times you and yours are intimate. All you've got to do is put some money in it and watch the cash stack up!"

I'm telling you, out of all of the books I've read and tips I've given to married couples, this one right here is in the Top Five and continues to be a winner. 

Reward yourself—and your spouse—with a sex jar. You definitely won't regret it!

Related Stories:

What I've Learned About My Vagina Since Getting Married - Read More

Is Scheduled Sex Really Better Than No Sex At All? - Read More

I Saved My Virginity For My Husband And Ended Up With Bad Sex - Read More

We Gave Up Sex After Having Our First Child - Read More

Featured image by Shutterstock

How Sex Changes After Marriage - xoNecole: Women's Interest, Love, Wellness, Beauty ›

10 Sex Resolutions To Make This Year - xoNecole: Women's Interest, Love, Wellness, Beauty ›

What GROWN Women Consider Great Sex To Be - xoNecole: Women's Interest, Love, Wellness, Beauty ›

Grown Woman Keys To Great Sex - xoNecole: Women's Interest, Love, Wellness, Beauty ›

Americans Are Having Less Sex. Here's How To Avoid Being A Statistic. - xoNecole: Women's Interest, Love, Wellness, Beauty ›

13 Things To Put On Your Ultimate Sex Bucket List ›

Married Sex - Marriage Advice ›

Sex/textual Conflicts in The Bell Jar: Sylvia Plath's Doubling Negatives ›

The Sex Challenge ›

Sent from my iPhone

[primojab]

Once again we’re back! @the_abyss_podcast Issue 76 we take a trip to Canada to sit with the Hip Hop Learner:Alex Kuchma on the eve of the release of his new monthly zine THE UNDERGROUND VAULT: HIP HOP REVIEW VOL.1 which is available now LINK IN HIs BIO!!! This man is a bonafide scholar keeping track of almost EVERY project that comes out and releasing various articles in @crownthement while studying for his Masters in hip hop culture and has taking the time to document this culture and Canadian hip hop specifically since 2011! His extensive efforts come straight from the heart and the authenticity of his perspective is genuinely dope, the work this man is doing only further cements the importance of this era! Join Karl Lukey and I while we dig deeper into the ABYSS!#nowstreaming #soundcloud #applemusic #youtube #spotify #journalism #canada #cbc #canadianhiphop #hiphop #scholar #archives #historical #tuesday #vibes #rappers #rapmusic #art #undergroundhiphop #boombap #podcast #fortheculture (at CBC/Radio-Canada) https://www.instagram.com/p/CoXe4_mr7px/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[givingtorebent]

THE MUSEUM LETTER PT 2 (Part 1 is fun, but not as fun. - essentially boiled down to asking them if they'd like to put on a performance art show where I sat in their atrium and stared at their guests.)

First off: the outside envelope. Lovely thick textured green paper, staples from a stapler, Sturdy black duct tape (Gorilla brand,) and a little face (the rest of the lips are unfortunately on the other side. I'll do better in the future. No return address 'cause I scoped the place out and realized I could just deliver it myself. (The current preferred mode.)

After opening the first envelope, they'd be greeted by 2 sub envelopes!!! I put some real thought into these. The "All Access Museum Admission" is from one of their bitter competitors. The other envelope is just some fun!

We'll start with the main bulk of the envelope before we get to the little tidbits.

I don't know what to say here. I'm a wordsmith. I mold the form to suite my needs. Language is but another medium for dance. Yeup.

ISN'T MY COW BUTTON COOL?????? (You are so jealous. and that's fine.)

[The talking to my mom bit is... because my mom at times in her professional career has bumped into folks there. People in town just kinda know my mom. You don't need to know about my mother. So I will not disclose mother related information.

Anyways. It might have been amusing in some world if they sleuthed out my mother's identity, realized they had her number somewhere, called her and just asked...

M: "What's up with the letter from your child? It's super dope and cool and from a well adjusted member of society."

and my mom would answer "Ya huh. Real normal cool swag turbo-normalicious child-o-mine do be doing them letters."

and then it gets revealed that *my mom added me to the call when it started and I've been listening the whole time*

me: "squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee omg omg omg [I'm blushing soooooo hard rn] they said whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat about my letter? That's SUPER EPIC MODE!!!!!!! omg. I'm going to go anticlimactically ballistic?!?!?! Squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. Freaking yes dude. Bro. I'm so pumped rn. Friggin yes!"

They were listening the whole time

me: "oh god. were you guys listening to all of that?"

I compress my existence into myself becoming a nothingness only AI art enthusiasts can fathom.

Fin. [bit ends]

I don't know. I thought it would have been funny?

haha.]

The "Missed Opportunity" was a cutout from the last letter. An art piece derived from a decisive lack of action on the Museum's end after my first (relatively cool and funny letter) was completely ignored because it probably looked sketchy as fuck and said something like "to whomever wants to have some fun."

And finally the gifties. I included some Tarot cards I was working on at the time (one of 20 projects that are only kinda completed.) And a calling card with my #.

They haven't called me.

I cannot fathom why.

I am lovely.

A treat. A bonafide treat of a human.

Alas. Some folks let life whisk them away like a dandelion seed, others fight the current for some reason or another.

Sitting in my chair, thinking it would be fun to chuckle right now. I'm great.

Ben

[irrelevantnostalgia]

Cake Mania: To the Max! (2011): Part 2

ᆞCᆞᆞhᆞᆞaᆞᆞrᆞᆞaᆞᆞcᆞᆞtᆞᆞeᆞᆞrᆞᆞsᆞ ᆞCᆞᆞoᆞᆞnᆞᆞtᆞᆞiᆞᆞnᆞᆞuᆞᆞeᆞᆞdᆞ

Psychic Sheila

Favorite TV Show: Cooking show

Continues to be the GOAT

Miss Feliday (She has a name!)

Favorite TV Show: News

Oil Baron

Favorite TV Show: Cooking show

He's the Chinese Emperor/Napoleon/Knight of this game

Vacation Santa

Favorite TV Show: Rock Concert

No Christmas in July, Santa's just here to chill...until he has to wait 0.5 more seconds than usual for a cake

6 B.C. (Before Cake Mania) Lance the Delivery Guy

Favorite TV Show: Cooking show

Actually, I don't know how long after this game Cake Mania's events would occur, but I think 6 years is a decent guess.

Risha

Favorite TV Show: News

So here is what I found interesting. Risha is supposedly Jill's BFF from high school in this game. Thus, she was at the very least commuting to Bakersfield to go to school everyday. Even scrolling through the level map displays pictures of her with bb Jill. This further hammers in the fact that she was at least exposed to Bakersfield, if not straight up grew up there.

In Cake Mania 2 she was introduced as Jill's "college friend." In Main St they had her acting like she had never been exposed to a small town before and that she was a bonafide City Slicker. How dare my mindless time management cake baking game not have continuity and ret-con the earlier roots of friendship! It's fine though, I prefer this timeline where they are childhood besties.

Here is the trophy display! I didn't collect all of them because I didn't finish upgrading everything, and a lot of the trophies are related to completing all the upgrades for certain equipment.

ᆞMᆞᆞyᆞ ᆞOᆞᆞpᆞᆞiᆞᆞnᆞᆞiᆞᆞoᆞᆞnᆞ

Did this game need to be made, especially since the Cake Mania series already reached its maximum capacity in terms of what it could offer to players? Not really. We easily could have had some cutscene to show Jill and Jack and their kids in Lights, Camera, Action! to at least wrap up that plotline. But the developers decided to crank one more Cake Mania game out, and frankly, I'm not mad about it. I am a bit biased though. Someone like me would enjoy a game where the of the main character of a mindless time management game got her lore expanded. Plus, I think this game made enough subtle adjustments in equipment to upgrade and character dynamics to where it can stand out from the first two Cake Manias. Hell, despite having a hefty 100 levels I still found this game to be less boring to play than Cake Mania 2 just because you were kept on your toes from beginning to end. So yes, I can take off my heart-goggles off this series and admit that this was the developers milking the last few drops the Cake Mania cow could offer, but I think they made those last drops count.

I give this game a 1989/1989 (Taylor's version)

ᆞJᆞᆞiᆞᆞlᆞᆞlᆞ ᆞLᆞᆞoᆞᆞrᆞᆞeᆞ!

This game was more story heavy than Cake Mania games typically are. I don't mean to talk down on the amazing cinematic time travel moon travel and king fu pride and prejudice plots, but this one has a more...grounded plot.

It starts off with Jill and Jack going through old photo albums of Jill from her childhood where they get to her high school pictures. This starts the flashback to 1989 when the game is set and when Jill is a senior in high school.

The level intros are excerpts from Jill's diary where she contemplates what she wants to do with her life, talks about prom preparations since throughout the game she agrees to go with Risha (as besties!) and agrees to make desserts for the celebration, and a few pop culture/current event references here and there (start of the Simpsons, Berlin wall). We learn that her mother was an accountant and her father a graphic designer, and the game confirms the assumption that they are dearly departed. Again, I didn't expect it to be groundbreaking stuff, but it is a bit endearing especially since the Cake Mania lore has expanded so much since the first game. The dope who came up with the idea of an aquarium bakery in Cake Mania 2 is now her husband, and we got to see what Jill's longest friendship with Risha was like (even if there was a bit of a ret-con haha).

bb Jill!

Jill with her parents!

Going to prom with a bestie > going to prom with a guy named Buck

Life advice with grandpa!

A possible hint as to what she should do in the future? She was getting geeked at the idea of making a cake for Prom after all!

Ah, the good 'ol yap session with your bestie. Instead of soda shops, these days we more likely frequent a coffee shop or boba tea shop....

Here is Jill and Risha at Prom with her parents looking down from heaven :D

[airadam]

Episode 180 : Reverse Jams

"Slashed all four tyres on the bandwagon..."

- Pos

The end of the fourteenth year of the show is here, with the numerically-satisfying number 180! It's been a good month for shows, with a highlight being seeing Edo G live for the first time, so I've included a couple of his tracks alongside some recent releases, a rarity or two, and some bonafide old classics. The show is a touch longer than usual, running a little over an hour, but hopefully it still flies by for you!

Mastodon : @airadam@mastodon.me.uk

Twitch : @airadam13

Playlist/Notes

Edo G, DJ Yoda, and Brad Baloo : Talk About It

Coming off the back of seeing a great performance by Edo G and DJ Yoda at The Hip-Hop Chip Shop in Manchester this month, I thought we'd start the episode with a smooth selection from their new "Hometown Heroes" EP. Edo G is in his grown man rap bag on a Brad Baloo beat, with Yoda on the cut - and if the record he's cutting is what I think it is, then that's an A1 selection.

Visoneers : Swahililand

I finally got round to digitising the "Hipology" 7" box set, a 2012 release by Marc Mac's Visioneers project that features tributes to the Hip-Hop side of his influences, and notably contains several cover versions of famously-sampled tracks, of which this is one. This is a beautiful version of a track originally by the late great jazz pianist and composed Ahmad Jamal, which eventually breaks out into the part most people will recognise - the mighty chords sampled from the Jamal version by J Dilla for De La Soul's "Stakes Is High".

DJ Spinna ft. Dynas : More

Grab the "Sonic Smash" album by Spinna if you see it - it's no longer on streaming services and with it also not being available on Bandcamp, picking up a physical copy is the only way to secure yourself a copy of this really high-quality album. In the meantime, take this slice, with Spinna coming with his trademark synth bass as the centre of the instrumental, and Miami's Dynas, a longtime collaborator, spitting a positive message on the mic.

Buscrates ft. Soraya Watti : On My Way

It was great to hear Buscrates play this track during a DJ set on Twitch recently while Soraya Watti was actually in the chat - the love she was getting was beautiful. This warm, bassy, soulful cut is the closer on last year's "Control Center" LP, a triumph from the Pittsburgh synth maestro.

Curren$y ft. Freddie Gibbs : Stash House

Eighties vibes here on the production, with 808-Ray going vaporwave style on the main sample and then adding his drum track to it. Curren$y fills this lane extremely well, as he uses his trademark relaxed flow to liken the dope stuff being exported out of his studio to...well, actual dope...while guest Freddie Gibbs just jumps straight out of the analogies and into the street for real. This is from the "Andretti 12/30", which was one of twelve (!) monthly releases Curren$y did back in 2016 - he might sound relaxed enough to be able to fall off the floor, but he's one of the most prolific MCs of his generation.

Fat Pat : Tops Drop

RIP Fat Pat, the creator of a true Southern classic that just overflows with good vibes! J Slash on production brings in the bassline groove from an 80s soul classic on this track from Pat's debut "Ghetto Dreams", and the lyrics are just about the joys of stunting in a nice convertible. This still gets plenty of play to this day on its home turf, and the youngsters at University of Houston basketball games hear it as the team's theme music - even though it was released before they were born!

Ilajide : Number One

The exact flavour of banging beat we've come to expect from Detroit's Ilajide, with the drums smacking, the main sample stuttering and the bass coming in strong to undergird it all. I might need to go and find/buy the original sample, which plays for a few seconds quietly at the very end, but you can find this track and some other excellent work on the "3" album.

Declaime : Exclaim The Name

A track with a bump so urgent it almost feels like it's tripping over itself (courtesy of Kankick), this is quality turn of the century underground business out of Oxnard, California from the  2001 "Andsoitisaid" LP. Declaime is perhaps better known to many as Dudley Perkins - especially if you follow the Stones Throw label - and while he can sing, don't get confused and think his bars aren't tough.

Semi Six : 24K Rap

One thing about a Semi Six record is that you rarely get a long and clear intro, which might not be ideal for us DJs but shows how eager he is to get on and demolish the track! It's fitting that he mentions Raekwon here, as the track draws its title from a track that Rae and Havoc did with J Dilla that came out on the 2009 posthumous LP "Jay Stay Paid". AntBell! produces this new single, while Semi delivers, as promised, the golden era rhymes he mentions in the hook.

Edo G ft. Krumb Snatcha and Jaysaun : Stop Dat

Pure Boston on the mic here, with the message from all the MCs being an emphatic recommendation to stay true to yourself rather than putting out a false image - one that at best is an embarrassment, and at worst a safety risk. Pete Rock's beat smacks without overly dominating, leaving space for you to understand every single word. The place to find this is the "My Own Worst Enemy" album, which has been re-released digitally in recent years with the instrumentals for every track bundled in, making it a true Hip-Hop DJ jewel.

De La Soul : Big Mouf

A bit of an obscurity for you! "Are You In?: Nike+ Original Run" was a collaboration between De La and Nike (yes, the shoe company) that was intended to be part of a series of albums as soundtracks for runners. The whole thing is a largely continuous mix, and has some really good tracks that even dedicated De La fans might not know! This particular track is a heavy Dave West production with an incredibly long intro before the lyrics properly kick in - that isn't me cutting it back and forth or extending it, the original sounds like that. You might struggle to find this one - I don't think it's on any of the streaming services or download stores, and the 2009 vinyl that I got at the time only pops up for sale occasionally.

DJ Nu-Mark ft. Full Crate : Pass The Courvoisier

Another cover version, this time of a Pharrell-produced Busta Rhymes club banger, which was a highlight of the 2021 "Run For Cover" album - a full version excursion from a DJ known best as part of Jurassic 5. Nu-Mark links up with Full Crate, a producer from Armenia via the Netherlands, for a horn-laden track that could almost make you believe that it's an old original that the Busta record was reworking!

James Brown : Don't Tell A Lie About Me And I Won't Tell The Truth On You

Topical 😆 A slice of funk from "Hell", The Godfather's thirty-eighth studio album, released back in 1974. You may well recognise this title as it was borrowed almost word-for-word for a recent lyric!

[Easy Mo Bee] Termanology : It's Time

This is the tasty, but extremely short, beat that opens up Term's "Politics As Usual" LP, produced by the great Easy Mo Bee. I'd almost forgotten about it, but it provides a nice bridge into the next cut...

Portishead : Strangers

There's not much I can say about the brilliant Portishead debut album "Dummy" that hasn't been said by full-time writers, so just take it from me - it's a must-listen. Beth Gibbons' voice is processed here as though it's coming from a recording decades older, and the union of that and that heavy production was highly innovative at the time. 

Chalk : Stay With Me

This month we were treated to a new release by Manchester artist Chalk that has been four years in the making, a real labour of love. His new LP "Death Knocks And He Shall Die" is a film noir-influenced instrumental album, a soundtrack to a film that doesn't exist - think of a darker, more vintage take on Prince Paul's "A Prince Among Thieves" without any MCs. It's best appreciated over the full length of its sixteen tracks, but this is a nice sample of what you can expect. When I played this track on a recent Twitch stream, at least a couple of people immediately said that it reminded them of DJ Shadow's "Endtroducing" - high praise indeed.

Planet Asia : Place Of Birth

I can't remember where I first heard this, but it was probably an underground mixtape somewhere, and it reminds me of the kind of thing I often used to end up buying when I was supposed to be shopping for tracks for a club night! Planet Asia is a veteran MC out of Fresno, California, and this 1999 single was a fine one as just the second release in his career. He gets a big assist here from two-thirds of Cali compatriots Dilated Peoples - Evidence's beat is dark and fairly sparse, with Babu's cuts adding extra texture in the hooks, intro, and outro.

Evil Needle ft. Venuz Beats : Dive

Evil Needle is becoming a favorite instrumental producer of mine, and together with Venuz Beats he brings us a heavy-bottomed yet floaty head-nodder which you can find on the "Sound Escapes" EP - well worth picking up just for this one.

UGK : Ridin' Dirty

Finishing up with another Southern classic, another car themed track, but a world away from the celebratory air of "Tops Drop". As funky and mellow as the late Pimp C's production is, this is lyrically dark and paranoid - but as a wise man once said, just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you. The "they" in this case are the police and their informants, the natural enemies of anyone riding in a car carrying something that they legally shouldn't be... This is the title track from UGK's third LP, and a perfect example of what Pimp C's stepfather meant when advised his son to "put some music into" his Hip-Hop - the multi-instrumentalist was a master at bringing that live feel to his work in a way that ensures it hasn't dated a day.

Please remember to support the artists you like! The purpose of putting the podcast out and providing the full tracklist is to try and give some light, so do use the songs on each episode as a starting point to search out more material. If you have Spotify in your country it's a great way to explore, but otherwise there's always Youtube and the like. Seeing your favourite artists live is the best way to put money in their pockets, and buy the vinyl/CDs/downloads of the stuff you like the most!

Check out this episode!

[esonetwork]

'Kill Me If You Can' Book Review By Ron Fortier

New Post has been published on https://esonetwork.com/kill-me-if-you-can-book-review-by-ron-fortier/

'Kill Me If You Can' Book Review By Ron Fortier

KILL ME IF YOU CAN By Mickey Spillane and Max Allan Collins Titan Books 273 pgs

Once again writer Max Allan Collins has completed a Mike Hammer story left unfinished by the late Mickey Spillane. If you’re a Spillane fan, this is always a cause for celebration. Note, that this volume is divided into two sections. The first is the actual novella length, “Kill Me If You Can,” and the second is a bonus collection of several Spillane short stories.

Whereas the novella itself is a fun read, it is very formulaic and contains most of the iconic tropes most Hammer tales are known for. The murder victim is an old Hammer acquaintance. The list of suspects includes the usual group of mean, sadistic gangsters and lastly, there’s the drop-dead gorgeous femme fatale. A seductress who is both good and bad tempting our tough guy hero to ignore his instincts and just put out the lights. Now formulas are not inherently a bad thing. Every mystery series since Sherlock Holmes came on the scene has used them; from Nero Wolfe to James Bond. Formulas are those comfortable pieces we’ve come not only recognize but also appreciate when delving into the series’ latest entry. If you’re a bonafide fan, you’ll see the climax coming a mile away.

The enjoyable surprises arrive in the book’s second half and those short story gems. There are five total; several adapted from radio plays and two featuring Hammer. Of the five, the standouts are “The Punk,” a grim, honest look at dope addiction, and “Tonight My Love,” delivering P.I. Hammer as the knight in tarnished armor destined to rescue a certain damsel in distress. The last line will put a smile on your face.

“Kill Me If You Can” is another great addition to the completist wish list. For Spillane fans, it’s Christmas coming early this year.

[cyarskaren52]

The Notorious B.I.G. may have had a relatively brief career, but that has never obscured the fact that the Brooklyn emcee is one of the greatest to ever pick up a pen. You can't quibble about the brevity of a legend's catalog when the body of work is as uniformly strong as Biggie's. No, quite the opposite: it should bring the greatness into sharp relief.

So much of the legacy of Biggie Smalls spans two official studio albums over the course of two-and-a-half years, and in that regard, Biggie is like a Jimi Hendrix or Kurt Cobain. Neither of those rock legends had long careers, but the impact of their art was/is seismic. Biggie's brilliant lyricism is on full display across Ready To Die and Life After Death, a rapper capable of painting pictures with his words; blessed with a gift for the descriptive, as well as a macabre sense of humor that was always unique. 

It's been decades since we lost Biggie, but his body of work is always here to remind us of his gifts. We had to pick the 25 Dopest Songs from The Notorious B.I.G. And it wasn't easy. 

#26

"THIS TIME AROUND" MICHAEL JACKSON FEAT. THE NOTORIOUS B.I.G. [BONUS SONG]

Our BONUS SONG pick is a celebrated classic guest spot! MJ goes off on his haters with a Hip-Hop legend riding shotgun. Even the King Of Pop was a fan of Chris Wallace. 

#25

"TEN CRACK COMMANDMENTS"

Biggie Smalls breaks down the dope game with ten simple rules on this classic Preemo track that infamously flips Chuck D's plea for economic empowerment into a cocaine manifesto. Irony, thy name is Christopher. 

#24

"MY DOWNFALL" FEAT. D.M.C.

The King Of Rock reinterpolates a classic line from "Here We Go" as the hook for this B.I.G. anthem. Over an urgent backdrop, Biggie's paranoia is raised to a fever pitch. Puff plays instigator. 

#23

"MACHINE GUN FUNK"

Arguably the most underrated song on "Ready To Die," Biggie gets to lean into his lyrical bonafides on one of his debut album's best slices of boom bap. 

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#22

"PARTY & BULLSHIT"

The song that started everything. Biggie's flow and voice were so unique and his lyrical delivery was the perfect instrument for his wit and skill. A star from Day One. 

#21

"LONG KISS GOODNIGHT"

A RZA beat and a reference to the woefully underrated Geena Davis/Sam Jackson flick form the foundation for one of Biggie's most darkly murderous revenge fantasies. 

#20

"ME AND MY BITCH" (COMPUTER LOVE REMIX)

The "Ready To Die" original is more famous, but those who know remember this stellar remix from "The Show" original motion picture soundtrack. 

#19

"SOMEBODY GOTTA DIE"

The dark story of vengeance gone awry, this standout from "Life After Death" served notice, early on in that album's tracklisting, that Chris Wallace was stepping his game up. 

#18

"NIGGAS BLEED"

Another macabre slice of Hitchcockian storytelling; this time the rap Frank White dictates a narrative about robbery, murder and mayhem. One of his absolute best. And absolute darkest. 

#17

"THE WHAT" FEAT. METHOD MAN

Two legends who were just becoming household names in 1994, the Brooklyn icon and his Wu-affiliated compadre bring out the best in each other here. 

#16

"NOTORIOUS THUGS" FEAT. BONE THUGS-N-HARMONY

Another famed guest appearance in Biggie's catalog, Bone Thugs show up on this classic from "Life After Death" and influence the East Coast emcee to adopt a little Midwestern speed rap flavor. 

#15

"MO MONEY, MO PROBLEMS" FEAT. PUFF DADDY, MA$E AND FAITH EVANS

The video became a staple of the Shiny Suit Era, and unofficially furthered the Bad Boy image in the Puffy and Ma$e era, to the point where the fact that it's a Biggie song can sometimes feel obscured. But make no mistake: B.I.G. ROCKS this. 

#14

"WHAT'S BEEF"

From one of the sunniest tracks he ever released, to one of the darkest and most sinister. Over those dramatic strings, Biggie once again leans into his "rap Alfred Hitchcock" side, offering up a chilling ode to murder and vengeance with shock value to spare. 

#13

"SUICIDAL THOUGHTS" - NOTORIOUS B.I.G.

The album close from "Ready To Die" is Biggie at his most chilling. The song is driven by Biggie's broken rant to his friend Puff, grimly echoing the title track's themes of alienation and despair. 

#12

"SKY'S THE LIMIT" FEAT. 112

One of Biggie's greatest gifts is how he could contrast the darkness with the light; and this effervescent single was B.I.G. at his most upbeat, reveling in how good things can get. 

#11

"GIMME THE LOOT"

Biggie adopts the persona of two BK stickup kids on this classic from "Ready To Die."

#10

"HYPNOTIZE" FEAT. PAM LONG

One of Biggie's most inescapable singles, it came to define the sound of 1997 Bad Boy Records. Proof positive that, for all the praise he gets, we sometimes underappreciate Biggie's gift for songcraft. 

#9

"WHO SHOT YA?"

The controversial B-side that served as a catalyst for Hip-Hop's most infamous and tragic feud, the song is an all-timer, even divorced from the drama that would come to define it. 

#8

"UNBELIEVABLE"

Over one of DJ Premier's dopest beats, Christopher Wallace flexes his lyrical muscle. 

#7

"I GOT A STORY TO TELL"

When B.I.G. is mentioned as one of the greatest storytellers of all time, this song is one that seems to always affirm his stature to doubters. Biggie at his funniest, most descriptive and absolute best. 

#6

"EVERYDAY STRUGGLE"

One of the best examples of Biggie's gifts as a storyteller, it's a master class in rhyming narrative. And B.I.G. introduces us to some of his classic characters, including Two-Techs and Alberta. 

#5

"KICK IN THE DOOR"

Over a flip of Screamin' Jay Hawkins, Biggie goes off. One of the best lyrical showcases on an album overstuffed with greatness, it's B.I.G. at his most nimble. 

#4

"ONE MORE CHANCE"

The popular remix to one of the standout tracks from "Ready To Die," it further cemented Biggie's playarific persona and the video is one of the era's most memorable. 

#3

"WARNING"

After establishing B.I.G.'s "Ready To Die" campaign with a pair of feel-good singles, the Brooklyn emcee's dark storytelling side came to the fore on this sinister hit. 

#2

"JUICY"

There are few opening bars in music as iconic as the couplet that kickstarts this uber-classic. Biggie announced himself to the mainstream with this rags-to-riches classic that sounds like the story of Hip-Hop itself. 

#1

"BIG POPPA"

It's one of the most definitive songs of the 1990s and so anthemic you could argue it's Christopher Wallace's theme song. The late Chucky Thompson laced The Notorious B.I.G. with one of the most recognizable tracks of all time.

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[hiphopheadspodcast]

Che` Noir ft Ransom - Bidding War (Prod. by Trox)

Che` Noir ft Ransom – Bidding War (Prod. by Trox)

Two of my favorite rappers right now are Che Noir and Ransom. This track is dope af. Peace to Bonafide for sliding through with this one.

[bonafidexdopeness]

William Conrad Erwin II (BXD™) | Jay Electronica | ESH® Full Color Portrait Work from The ESH® Portraiture Collection (Photoshop) | © 2023 EarnSomeHeight® #EarnSomeHeight #WilliamConradErwinII #BonafidexDopeness #BonafideDopeness #HighPointNC #JayElectronica

[mercizdope]

That rare moment of me turned into art. 

🔥✍🏽 I appreciate that homie ! @bonafidexdopeness

[catgirl-kaiju]

Nothing more dope than seeing a trans girl posing in front of a Godzilla poster. Like, these are my favorite things together in one place. Bonafide iconic

[jayebyrde]

Gateway experiments:

I’m up to 2:6. I feel like a lot of the initial euphoria has disappeared. Some of it has been really amazing, some of it has gone over my head and I didn’t understand what I was supposed to do. (Even with the manual. Still bitter about that btw.). A lot of it sounds like hokey new age bullshit, but as time goes on I’m realizing that hokey new age bullshit isn’t so hokey. It might even be the bonafide real thing. If there is such a thing as “the real thing”. Whatever that even means.

So I’ve learned how to adjust my mind to tackle several different aspects of what’s in front of me. I ... might? .... have astral projected. I’m not sure? Maybe? I’ve never done it before so I don’t know for sure. I’ve learned how to pay attention to my body.

It’s really hard to accept the “super powers” aspect of it. I really think I’m just conditioning my brain to experience more than it does on autopilot. I’ve never levitated or healed myself or spied on my hot neighbors in the shower. I haven’t read minds or talked to aliens. At least I don’t think they were aliens. And I don’t know if they were even real and not a dream. Short story: I’ve been able to do a lot of cool shit in my head, but nothing to affect the outside world.

Even if this is as good as it gets, I do feel better though. And the experiences have never been anything less than pleasant. Extremely enjoyable in fact. I look forward to them. I will say though that so far they are NOT worth 2000 dollars. If I paid two grand for this I’d be fucking irate. Thank god for YouTube.

So, I’m gonna keep going. With an open mind even. We’ll see. It would be pretty dope to have super powers. Lol.

[aion-rsa]

Best Romantic Movies on Amazon Prime Right Now

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Some movies brave enough to tread where only pop songs and poems go, and try to capture all the drama, contradictions and happy, bubbly feelings that come along with romance and love. It’s high-time that we honor them and defend them against their unearned sappy reputations with the best romantic movies on Amazon Prime.

We’ve scoured Amazon Prime to find the best romantic movies available for your viewing pleasure. Here are the best romantic movies on Amazon Prime. Ok, some of them are perfectly sappy.

The Big Sick

Kumail Nanjiani and his wife Emily Gordon’s theatrical debut made big waves when it came out for the singularity of its vision and just how plain funny it is. Now Amazon gets to reap the benefits of producing a bonafide romantic indie hit by getting its exclusive streaming rights. The Big Sick is the real life story of comedian Kumail Nanjiani meeting and falling in love with his wife, Emily (who is played by Zoe Kazan in the film).

Kumail and Emily’s courtship process is difficult enough to begin with due to Kumail’s family pressuring him to find a nice Pakistani girl to settle down with. But soon things get even more difficult as Emily suffers a health scare and Kumail must suddenly contend with that situation and Emily’s eccentric parents who have just come to town. The Big Sick is a clear vision from talented people and tells a beautifully convincing love story while making plenty of room for laughter. Not only that but it’s a big win for our list of best romance movies on Amazon Prime.

Watch The Big Sick

What If

Canadian drama What If (originally known as The F Word before the MPAA got its greasy fingers all over it) is a fun romantic movie and a tremendous showcase for its two young stars Daniel Radcliffe (you know what he’s from) and Zoe Kazan (The Big Sick). Radcliffe stars as Wallace – a directionless young man living in Toronto who decides to become more social after his girlfriend cheats on him.

Enter Kylo Ren (Adam Driver playing a character who is unfortunately not named Kylo Ren) who takes Wallace to a party where he meets the alluring Chantry (Kazan). Wallace and Chantry immediately fall for each other. Unfortunately there’s the small matter of Chantry’s boyfriend. What If? is a sweet little Canadian flick that knows how to push its audiences romantic buttons.

Watch What If

Still Mine

Still Mine isn’t necessarily about romance. It’s about love – a deep prevailing love built up over decades. Craig Morrison (James Cromwell) is a farmer in rural New Brunswick, Canada. He intends to build a new house for his ailing wife Irene (Geneviève Bujold) but runs into trouble with the local municipality’s bureaucracy prevents him from doing so.

Still Mine is as romantic a movie about bureacratic development regulations as has ever existed. Cromwell and Bujold have wonderful chemistry and paint a portrait of profound, abiding love.

Watch Still Mine

Some Kind of Wonderful

Some Kind of Wonderful doesn’t have the same pop culture standing as other John Huges films like Sixteen Candles or Pretty in Pink. Still this remains a worthwhile entry into the Hughes canon on teenage love. 

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Keith Nelson (Eric Stoltz) is a high school outcast who has his eyes set on popular girl Amanda Jones (Lea Thompson). Thankfully he has his tomboyish Watts (Mary Stuart Masterson) to help court her. Based on that meager plot description, you may think you know where Some Kind of Wonderful is going to end up, and…you’re probably right. That doesn’t make the journey any less satisfying. 

Watch Some Kind of Wonderful

To Catch a Thief

You know who would make a great romance film? The guy who did Psycho. Yes To Catch a Thief is a classic romance film from none other than Alfred Hitchcock. Of course, there’s a lot more going on in this heist thriller.

Cary Grant stars as retired cat burglar John Robie. When another burglar starts copying his act, Robie has to undergo One Last Job (TM) to catch…a thief. In the process John comes across the wealthy Frances (Grace Kelly) and the two strike up an unlikely romance for the ages.

Watch To Catch a Thief

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Hello, My Name is Doris

Between TBS’ Search Party and Hello, My Name is Doris, director Michael Showalter had a stellar 2016. Hello, My Name is Doris is a wonderfully sweet, equally tragic and completely hilarious romantic comedy. Sally Field stars as the titular Doris, a lively woman in her 60s who after the death of her mother becomes infatuated with a younger man. 

Read more

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By Alec Bojalad

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By Alec Bojalad

With the help of cliched self-help materials she does whatever she can to get his attention. Hello, My Name is Doris is an empathetic romantic comedy that will change how you view age. 

Watch Hello, My Name is Doris

Sabrina (1995)

Let’s get one thing out of the way right now. Sabrina‘s theatrical poster is dope. When I was a kid and I would pass the VHS cover in Blockbuster, I couldn’t help but think “Wow, that is a real adult movie.” At a young age, the mere sight of a woman’s lascivious red lipstick (lascivious in my head at least) was enough to fry my brain. Poster aside, however, Sabrina is an excellent romance with some real star power. It’s a remake of the 1954 film of the same name starring Billy Wilder and Audrey Hepburn. 

This version was directed by the great Sydney Pollack and stars Harrison Ford, Greg Kinnear, and Julia Ormond. Weirdly enough Greg Kinnear plays the ultimate rich playboy while Harrison Ford plays his studious older brother. Weird casting choices but it works out alright thanks to each actor’s chemistry with Ormond.

Watch Sabrina

Ghost

Ghost is much more than just the reason you can no longer attend a pottery class without giggling. It’s a legitimately great sci-fi romance yarn. Patrick Swayze stars as Sam a banker who is killed by a mugger. Immediately post-death he discovers that he has become a ghost and can no longer directly interact with his girlfriend Molly (Demi Moore).

Sam sets out to solve his own murder and somehow reconnect with the woman he loves. Ghostcomes along with all the corniness of an early ’90s blockbuster but its central theme of love trying to achieve the impossible plays in any decade.

Watch Ghost

Brokeback Mountain

Longing is a crucial part of the formula in any romance movie and Brokeback Mountain has it in spades. Ang Lee’s 2005 film played a crucial role in bringing queer cinema to the mainstream and it did so by presenting mostly straight audiences with a universal depiction of love and passion – the kind of love that supersedes the norms and expectations of everything in your life to that point.

Heath Ledger and Jake Gylllenhaal star as 1960s Wyoming cowboys Ennis Del Mar and Jack Twist. While herding sheep on the Brokeback mountains, Jack makes a sexual pass at Ennis and the two begin a summer-long physical affair. The movie then follows the pair through the subsequent decades as they try to return to their “normal” lives, all the while unable to forget their time on Brokeback.

Watch Brokeback Mountain

Letter to Juliet

Somewhere along the way, Hollywood decided to let Amanda Seyfried become the queen of romantic comedies set in exotic locales…and that’s perfectly fine with us.

In Letters to Juliet, Seyfried stars as a New York fact checker Sophie on “pre-honeymoon” with her fiancé in Verona. There she learns of the phenomenon of “letters to Juliet” where women women bring love letters to Juliet Montague’s Verona courtyard. When Sophie answers a letter from 1957, she embarks on a decades-spanning journey of love and self-discover.y

Watch Letters to Juliet

What Men Want

Back in 2000, only one film had the distinction…nay, the courage of trying to figure out What Women Want. The answer, apparently, was Mel Gibson. We don’t talk about this movie that much.

Read more

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Yesterday Is History: Meet the Latest Addition to the Time Travel Romance Genre

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2019’s What Men Want is a loose remake of the earlier film. And it has something that the original never did: Taraji P. Henson! Henson stars as Ali Davis, a sports agent who gains the ability to read men’s minds after meeting a shaman. The movie puts Ali’s male-dominated profession to good use and in the process tells a nifty little romance story.

Watch What Men Want

There’s Something About Mary

More than two decades later, it’s still wild to see that above screenshot. Like, that ran in newspapers. It was on a poster! And if you don’t know why a photo of Cameron Diaz with a unique hairstyle is a big deal then you’ve likely not seen the Farrelly Brothers 1998 gross out classic There’s Something About Mary.

This is not so much a romance movie as it is an exploration of the pitfalls of attraction. Diaz stars as Mary Jensen…and there’s just something about her. Ben Stiller, Matt Dillon, Lee Evans, and Chris Elliott all play men who are helplessly in love with Mary and trying to win her affection. In the process, many injuries as sustained.

Watch There’s Something About Mary

Moulin Rouge!

If you like your romance with more than a dash of Baz Luhrmann saturated colors and big, sexy musical numbers then Moulin Rouge! is almost certainly the movie for you.

This 2001 film is set in 1900s Paris amid the Bohemian movement. When Christian (Ewan McGregor) falls in love with Moulin Rouge cabaret actress and courtesan Satine (Nicole Kidman), he must contend with her impending betrothal (or really sale) to the Duke of Montrose. As one might imagine, this is resolved with quite a bit of singing and dancing.

Watch Moulin Rouge!

Sylvie’s Love

Amazon Prime’s 2020 film Sylvie’s Love positively oozes jazz era atmosphere and tells a compelling, decades-spanning love story in the process.

Tessa Thompson stars as Sylvie Parker, a young woman who one day meets an aspiring saxophonist (played by Kerry Washington’s husband and former NFLer Nnamdi Asomugha) and in her father’s record shop in 1950s Harlem. This leads to sweeping romance that guides the pair through the era’s jazz music scene.

Watch Sylvie’s Love

The post Best Romantic Movies on Amazon Prime Right Now appeared first on Den of Geek.

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