#blighted duology

[aleksanderscult]

In your post about the Darkling where you listed your opinions of him (first impression, impression now, favorite vs least favorite thing, etc) you said how if you had to choose a least favorite quality it would be his grumpiness (especially in RoW). Since I refuse to touch that cursed duology if it’s okay, may you explain what you mean? I know we get some of the Darkling’s POV but that’s pretty much all I know. Could this entire trait of his be a product of Bardugo’s retconning habit or is it something more?

Aha. I see you're practicing self-care too, dear anon. 😌

Here are some examples:

From his POVs we can see that Aleksander is very pragmatic but also bad-tempered and bitter but that's completely understandable.

He has just been resurrected and:

1) Encountered a Saint that he detests.

2) Found his country to be in the worst state possible. Flanked by enemies and ready to attack.

3) Oh and let's not forget that devastating blight! ☝️

4) His captors have treated him like shit and put him under inhuman conditions.

5) Saw the woman he loved live a life that she doesn't deserve, being a shell of her former self and married to a man that he hates and considers worthless.

6) He's all alone. No Baghra, no Alina, no allies, no soldiers. He has to start from all over and has found himself surrounded by idiots (but even so he feels the need to protect them).

The fact that I find his grumpiness kinda annoying is because I as a person have been surrounded by grumpy people all my life so I can't help but find it unattractive and bothersome.

But then again, Aleksander has a really valid reason for being this way. It's very possible that he took this sarcastic attitude from his mother. After all, they had spent so many years together that Aleksander really adopted most of her traits, unwillingly or not. But I also believe he's that way because he has lived for too long.

He's immortal. He has done everything and seen everything, has seen people being kind and cruel, predictable or unpredictable. His experiences have only made him more bitter but that's also because he hasn't seen any positive changes or results from his constant battle against the persecution or how Ravka and the Grisha have no regard for him or don't notice his efforts at all.

Anyway, he's bitter about many things. In RoW he's that way for the reasons I explained in the beginning but, as a whole, he's resentful for a bunch of reasons that include his immortality and its consequences, the loss of people he loved, his strive to be seen and appreciated and the horrors he has witnessed.

[izunias-meme-hole]

My Top 10 Ganon Incarnations (Remake)

Number 1. Breath of The Wild/Tears of The Kingdom - It's honestly surprising how this duology managed to crank out one of the greatest incarnations of Ganon in the series. In the first game, we see Ganon's power in the form of a demonic beast known as Calamity Ganon, and while this thing was basically an animal, it basically is the primary season why the world of BoTW is as baron as it is, and this monster does have both a large presence, and decent amount of activity though the Guardians, Blights, Divine Beasts, and blood moons, creating a fear factor for a good chunk of the game, which dissipates when you see that this things final form is just a flaming pig. However, in ToTK we meet the source of Calamity Ganon, the original Demon King Ganondorf from the era of Hyrule's founding and man does he deliver. He basically stays underground for a majority of the game after shattering the Master Sword and almost killing Link, but he never stops feeling like an active threat because of his Phantom Ganon's, Puppet Zelda, and the most dangerous thing in his arsenal, gloom. Not only that, but ToTK goes out of it's way to still present Ganondorf as a darwinistic asshole who worships power and actually thinks that his actions are justified, however unlike his other incarnations he has a terminal case of insanity from the get-go, which rears its head at every chance. These games made Ganon into a legitimate demon on all fronts, first introducing his pure demonic power without his dangerous mind and then introducing the true Demon King himself later on. And his final fate is ALL too fitting.

Number 2. Ocarina of Time/Twilight Princess - This was the best Ganondorf incarnation of a LONG time. He’s a timeless classic with simple, yet effective characterization who does so much with such little screentime. He starts out as a king of thieves with a large ambition who is willing to kill anyone who gets in the way of his prize, and said prize was the triforce, and he actually gets it, well a piece of it. Then in the future, he goes from that to a true King of Evil, and judging by the impact his reign has had on the land, and the fact that he nearly genocided the Zora and Gorons, is honestly enough to inform the player that he's somehow crueler than before. Also HE PLAYS HIS OWN THEME ON AN ORGAN IN REAL TIME AS YOU TRAVEL HIS CASTLE! And how could we forget about that horrific beast form. Also let’s not forget about his return in Twilight Princess, picking up where he left off after getting snitched on by Link. He's active through Zant for a lot of the game, and when we hear about him, he's basically built up as a ruthless ass bastard with a god complex, and he himself is such a god damn great final boss. OOT/TP Ganondorf was and IS the blueprint for any future incarnations of the character, and he was the best for a long time, and that quality remained when he returned in Twilight Princess as the final boss. But now he finally has an equal.

Number 3. Hyrule Warriors - To sum up this incarnation of Ganondorf, he's a magnificent bastard, and arguably the best representation of Ganon outside of the main series. He thrives on the battlefield, has learned from previous defeats, has his arrogance and ambitions on check, operates in the shadows if he has too, and most importantly HE GOT THE FULL TRIFORCE. He also has a dank design. Were it not for the fact that he's in a warriors game, this Ganondorf would've been worshiped by everyone.

Number 4. Super Smash Bros - He was a last minute inclusion in Melee, a bad character to play as in Brawl, a joke in smash 4 gameplay-wise. So why is he Number 3? He was a good "Orcus on His Throne" villain in Subspace, he got a HUGE upgrade in Ultimate, and the aura around him and the energy he has in ALL the games is 100% Ganondorf, from his taunts to the heaviness of his attacks. One of his taunts is literally him taking out a sword and putting it away, implying that he could use it, but only needs his overwhelming power to beat his enemies, and it's the type of arrogance I expect from Ganon when he's at the height of his power. He ain't the best character in the games and is in need of buffs, but I do believe he's a good representation of Ganon outside the main series. Also when do you ever see Ganon interacting with Bowser, Sephiroth, Ridley, AND King Dedede in offical media?

Number 5. A Link To The Past - I don’t feel like we give this man enough credit. He mainly pranced around as Agahnim in A Link To The Past, so he doesn’t have enough time to truly be himself, but even then he was still a great villain and a great final boss for his time. He’s aged like fine wine as a villain lore-wise and in some story elements, especially since Agahnim would not only be the inspiration for Zant, but the Phantom Ganons, literal extensions of Ganon himself. Sure he’s still a big blue boar, but he’s actually conniving, he’s got his mind intact, an entire realm that he has full control over, he actually took over Hyrule Castle via posing as a hero during his time as Agahnim, AND HE HAS THE FULL TRIFORCE. Sure he ain’t beating OoT Ganondorf, but he's the best Classic Ganon due to lore, feats, and the fact he walked so the other Ganons could run. Also this is the game that revealed snippets of Ganon’s origin, which we got to see in full in OoT.

Number 6. Wind Waker - After reassessing this take on Ganon, I realized that his biggest problem isn’t a lack of presence, because he does have that in spades still. His problem is a lack of general activity, aside from princess kidnapping which does end up hurting him a lot. But at the end of the day, Wind Waker’s Ganondorf carried by a great final battle, a good design, and genuine depth as a character. The best way to sum him up is "The Lord of A Dead Empire," and everytime he's appears, that becomes clearer and clearer. Despite this characterization of the big bad king being sadder than usual, this guy is still downright evil to the bone, so don't be caught off guard. Sure, he's lower on the list, but he's still pretty amazing, and he's also 50% of the fandom's favorite incarnation of him, which is honestly an achievement.

Number 7. Yuganon - Ganon was feral and mindless before this, but after basically fusing with the narcissistic artist Yuga, Yuganon here basically became more destructive and ambitious than both Yuga and Ganon. Yuga was already a good villain and creative villain, but combining him with a mindless and feral Ganon just established that “yep… he’s Lorule’s Ganondorf.”

Number 8. Four Swords Adventure - I’m honestly split on this guy. While he’s honestly not astounding, Ganon was decent here. He’s a reincarnation of Ganon that was active as Ganondorf, but only appears at the end as Ganon. However I do feel like he could’ve made just ONE appearance as Ganondorf the man at some point rather than just final boss pig beast Ganon. Aside from that, he’s just decent altogether. Nothing infuriating, but nothing good either.

Number 9. Oracle Games - He's basically a prototype Calamity Ganon, but he never got a full time in the limelight because Twinrova revived him at the end. However, he is here because, well... this is ironically a fitting fate for Classic Ganon at this point in the timeline. Being reduced to a mere mindless beast that only cares about destruction and nothing else.

Number 10. Zelda 1 - Nothing special, but he’s the first Ganon, so he’s kinda an honorary member here.

[simplegenius042]

Music Monday

Tagging @socially-awkward-skeleton @shallow-gravy @adelaidedrubman @strafethesesinners @strangefable @direwombat @derelictheretic @carlosoliveiraa @g0dspeeed @nightbloodbix @cassietrn @chazz-anova @josephslittledeputy @josephseedismyfather @deputyash @dephellseed @deputy-morgan-malone @trashcatsnark @voidika @vampireninjabunnies-blog @onehornedbeast @minilev @fourlittleseedlings @florbelles @corvosattano @afarcryfrommymain @skoll-sun-eater @softtidesworld @snake-in-the-garden @wrathfulrook @titiagls @inafieldofdaisies @megraen @starsandskies @ladyoriza @la-grosse-patate @thewanderer-000 @cloudofbutterflies92 and @i-am-the-balancing-point

Three songs for Far Cry The Silver Chronicles, A Radioactive Calamity of Love, Bombs & Gore and Life, Despair & Monsters. Also the last song is a song from Season 1 of Hazbin Hotel, which I'm aware isn't fully out yet, so maybe SPOILERS! Avoid the last song if you care enough. Music below:

Nadi Sinclair, a sharpshooter amongst Task Force 141, is forced to go on the run with Soap and Price in the Call To Arms duology after killing Shepard and try their darnedest to put an end to Makarov once and for all (therefore running with the metaphorical wolves after the ultranationalist leader). Though alternatively, this could be after Call To Arms, where she joins up with the Project at Eden's Gate under Alexander Khaos and Jacob Seed's tutelage, where, she literally and figuratively runs with the wolves, away from society's expectations, technology and whatnot. Song below:

"Trick or treat, what would it be? I walk alone, I'm everything My ears can hear and my mouth can speak My spirit talks, I know my soul believes

But we're running out of time (Time, oh) All the echoes in my mind cry There's blood on your lies The sky's open wide There is nowhere for you to hide The hunter's moon is shining

I'm running with the wolves tonight I'm running with the wolves I'm running with the wolves tonight I'm running with the wolves I'm running with the wolves tonight I'm running with the wolves I'm running with the wolves tonight I'm running with the wolves

A gift, a curse, they track and hurt Say can your dream, in nightmares seems A million voices silent screams Where hope is left so incomplete."

"cardigan" is a specific song that makes me think of Ortega "Ore" Brantley's final moments in The House Always On Top, as he stands in a dam that has an active nuclear warhead nearby, injured beyond belief, with one of his father's most dangerous spellcasters, Aggravor, keeping him in one place with nothing more than one hand touching his back, a fatal touch that would soon kill him whenever Aggravor chooses. And Ore reflects with what little time he has left on his loved ones, his companions, friends, family, mother, sister, the innocents killed by Urias under his watch, even the recent loss of Ryder, the Courier's presence being the cause of why he came to Hoover Dam in the first place if only because he saw a slim chance she survived and had to jump to it before it was too late. He thinks over his regret of not killing his father sooner, of being too late to save others, but also his accomplishments, over the fact his sister, and both of their students, had survived, and Ress had evolved far from the arrogant and immaturely entitled girl she started off as. And with that, when Ress finally enters the room, he makes sure to look upon her with pride, and knowing she won't be needing him anymore, verbally passes the torch to her. He has full confidence that she will end their father's blight even when Aggravor ends his life. This song can also be towards Ress as she loses her big brother, the one constant support in her life, the one person never willing to give up on her no matter how much of an ass she made of herself, the one person she thought she would walk the Earth with forever and ever due to their ageless immortality, so she would never be alone. Her big brother who took the roles of teacher, friend and father all in one, always there to guide and support her want for freedom (unlike Urias, who would have used her as a pawn), always there to say "I'll take it from here" whenever she messed up, whenever she needed help fighting. Which must be why Ore's last words, though reassuring, had hurt so much as well. Song below:

"To kiss in cars and downtown bars Was all we needed You drew stars around my scars But now I'm bleeding Cause I knew you stepping on the last train Marked me like a bloodstain, I, I knew you Tried to change the ending, Peter losing Wendy I, I knew you Leaving like a father, running like water When you are young they assume you know nothing But I knew you'd linger, like a tattoo kiss I knew you'd haunt all of my what-ifs The smell of smoke would hang around this long Cause I knew everything when I was young I knew I'd curse you for the longest time Chasing shadows in the grocery line I knew you'd miss me once the thrill expired And you'd be standing in my front porch light And I knew you'd come back to me You'd come back to me. And you'd come back to me. And you'd come back."

In The Thorned Crown of Iron Thrones, much like canon, Aegon II Targaryen isn't a good brother, nor is he a first son to be proud of (as evident by his father's absolute indifference with him and his mother's disappointment), even less a candidate to be a king of all things (sometimes he was thankful it was his half-sister who would sit the Iron Throne, though he knew that meant him and his younger siblings would be put to the sword, which was the only downside). He knew this to be true, everyone knew, even his own grandsire recognized more potential in Aemond even after his younger brother lost his eye. After the funeral of their older cousin Laena, after Aemond lost an eye to their half-sister's children for claiming a dragon which their deceased cousin had ridden on, after the arguments and screaming between everyone on both sides, for justice, for blood, for punishment, for some shred of care from the man who conceived them. And especially after hearing Corvus, the only older sibling that treated Aegon, his brothers, his sister, and his mother with more decency and kindness than their apathetic father and scornful half-sister (despite Corvus conviction to continue helping his adopted sister keep her claim), break down when father revealed the most damning and life-shattering secret about his "adopted" son (thanks Dad), Aegon couldn't handle it. Couldn't handle the shame, disappointment and hopelessness of the situation, so that night, he ran off. He ended up running off into Driftmark's woods, hoping that, maybe if he disappeared, everything would get better, that his half-sister that his father doted on more than Aegon and his siblings, or his younger brother who would do mother and his grandsire proud, or even their recently discovered half-brother, as merciful and decisive as he is (though Aegon highly doubted either father nor grandsire would allow it to happen), would sit the dreadful throne, be the ruler people wanted. Hell, he would even have Cecil to sit the throne, if it meant the self-proclaimed Royce woman would send her father, his terrifying uncle, to the Wall and marry off his siblings to noble houses willing to care for them. Not him. He wished to be forgotten, to curl up and shrink and shrink until he couldn't be seen anymore. He had not intended of coming across an ex-assassin woman who called herself Okkotsu, who had tried to murder his father back in the day and had a special connection with the recently deceased Laena. Nor had he foreseen them connecting with their troubles, through such unorthodox means. Okkotsu may not know what Aegon is exactly going through, but she knows enough to help lift his spirits up... through the power of accepting yourself as a sopping wet sad little meow-meow blorbo? Song below:

[I'm not going to include all the lyrics, just the ones I find matter to these two downtrodden losers. Also LOTS-OH cursing here]

"So things look bad, and you're backs against the wall Your whole existence seems fuckin' hopeless You're feeling filthy as a dive bar bathroom stall Can't face the world sober and dopeless You've lost your way, you think your life is wrecked Well, let me just say you're correct!"

"Wait what?"

"You're a loser, baby A loser, goddamn baby You're a fucked-up little whiny bitch."

"Hey!"

"You're a loser just like me."

...

"This supposed to make me feel better?"

"There was a time I thought that no one could relate To the gruesome ways in which I'm damaged But lettin' walls down, it can sometimes set you straight! We're all living in the same shit sandwich."

...

"I'm a loser, honey A schmoozer and a dummy But at least I know I'm not alone."

"You're a loser."

"Just like me."

...

"I'm trapped and it gets worse with every hour."

"You're a loser, baby."

"A loser, but just maybe if we-"

"Eat shit together, things will end up differently."

"It's time to lose your self-loathin' Excuse yourself, let hope in, baby Play your card, be who you are."

"A loser, just like me."

[hychlorions]

Soooo I decided to try and force my way through AA5 because I hate myself like that. I'm now on case 2. Case 1 was by far the worst case in any of the games. Worse than the fucking circus shit. Because that at least followed some logic but case 5-1 was so incredibly stupid that even after the "what really happened" part of it, it made no sense how they wanted you to come to any of those conclusions.

I could go on but that's not what I'm here to talk about haha.

I just wanna say I love how Apollo is so clearly the only normal person ever. Fulbright tells us the prosecutor is a convict and there because he understands psychology so they 100% needed him on this case and I got so angry with that logic, like yeah it's an Ace Attorney game but this is batshit insane. It's beyond stupid to do so, I know it's for the plot but like, that has got to be THE worst decision a court could make. And right after I was done bitching about it I clicked to continue the dialogue and APOLLO SAYS ALL THOSE THINGS AS WELL!!!

He truly is the only sane person in this universe, the only one able to use his braincells

i'm telling y'all the 3ds duology is a blight upon this earth it's like they gave ace attorney's worst qualities a megaphone and turned the volume up 500%

[scriptores]

𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐄 : agent twilight, spy x family

overview: in the middle of a cold war between the neighboring nations of westalis & ostania, twilight is a top agent working under W.I.S.E (westalian intelligence service - eastern division) striving to safeguard the fragile state of peace that grows more precarious everyday. a master of disguise, he is frequently sent undercover in the thick of ostanian territory, where many of his missions deal with thwarting extremist groups, infiltrating the inner circles of national unity party members (the political party that was deposed at the end of the first war), and extracting any information or plans that may bring on another war. for this reason, he's known as the man with a thousand faces, the ostanian government's most wanted agent, infamous for his achievements, while his true face, history, and identity remain an enigma.

VERSES.

canon: operation stryx is the current mission. his target is donovan desmond, the former prime minister and elusive leader of the national unity party who is in talks of planning something big and potentially detrimental to peace relations. twilight is posing as loid forger, a psychiatrist in the capital of ostania, berlint city, and has been tasked with building the perfect fake family in order to blend in with ostania's elite class and have his child enrolled in the same prestigious school as desmond's youngest son. due to a shortage of spies on the ground, he's also tasked with too many side quests, and can be found just about anywhere wearing any face. plots can take place within the series timeline, or prior with one of twilight's previous covers and operations.

mi6 / 007 / man from u.n.c.l.e. au: will usually be set in the 60s, but can also be used for modern day interactions and espionage universes. twilight is an agent for mi6 frequently tasked with undercover missions, primarily in europe, but throughout the continents as well. his job is to stop extremist activities before they become public, and gather or destroy intel as necessary to prevent another world war. much like his canon verse, no one outside his affiliated organizations and close assets know what he really looks like. ( he collaborates with u.n.c.l.e. but is still mi6; for james bond plots he's agent 004, still only known as twilight )

regency spy au: originally german, but orphaned in england, he works for england's war office as an undercover agent & asset during the napoleon wars. he's using several covers to keep an eye on the ton for traitorous plans, as well as the area of kent ( near aubrey hall ) where much of the supply and information smuggling happens. ( loosely based on julia quinn's spy duology )

dragon age: twilight was orphaned during the rebellion war between ferelden & orlais, and was trained to be a ferelden spy by william cousland. his first mission was to ensure empress celene's succession. he attended the university of orlais under the guise of a free marcher's heir and discreetly thwarted assassination attempts on the empress. with the peace treaty finally struck, twilight had been tasked with keeping an eye out for any breaches on either side, but primarily in orlais. he was stuck there the start of the blight, but despite the closed borders was able to find his way back in. he can be picked up as a companion in origins. by the events of da:i, leliana approaches him to join her and the inquisition as one of her top informants. his focus is then on tevinter, the ventori, and eventually the agents of fen'harel.

DOSSIER

name. [redacted] codename. twilight alias(es). loid forger (psychiatrist), robert (gov. attaché), lawrence (black market), lionel (national defense), roy (westalian soldier) pronouns. he/him age. late 20s / early 30s origin/nationality. luwen, westalis (default). west germany (60s/modern) etymology. human / spy. sexuality. bisexual alignment. neutral good , w.i.s.e. (canon), mi6 (60s/modern)

relations. * from loid forger's I.D. file: anya forger, daughter (alive), yor forger née briar, wife (alive) * from twilight's destroyed I.D. file: [redacted], mother (deceased), [redacted], father (presumed dead), [redacted], grand-uncle (deceased)

height. 6'2" build. slender / athletic hair. blonde eyes. blue scars. * from a shot in his left thigh, the bullet is still there, this is the ugliest one; * from a shot below his collar bone, with an exit wound on his right shoulder blade. * back of his head that's covered up by his hair. you'd only notice if you feel for it. scents. clean leather, gunpowder, cognac, tonka bean, and oak wood known languages: * canon verse: westalian, ostanian, hugarian, nortic * modern verse: german, dutch, english, japanese, french, russian, hungarian, & romansh. also basic portuguese.

abilities / skillset. master of disguise; expert marksmanship; genius intellect with a photographic memory; master tactician (sort of like nanami's ratio strategy, twilight can quickly scan a room/opponent/obstacle, play out various probable approaches in real-time until he finds the most precise and efficient one to win)

restrictions. while still strong, he'll rely on strategy to overpower someone, can be overwhelmed by large numbers when his stamina fails him; his kindness. while he is very methodical and unemotional during an operation, his kindness will on rare occasion win over his logic and may lead to decisions that would otherwise compromise his mission; a sleep deprived babe, may be vulnerable during naps.

theme. you only live twice, nancy sinatra / eleanor rigby, cody fry / rhinestone eyes, the gorillaz

[theowlhousefanboy]

Would make for a veeerrry interesting sequel saga crossover spotlight episode featuring the two. Might even make a companion piece with a concurrent duology between Dipper/Mason Pines hanging out with Luz Noceda, while Pacifica Northwest and Amity Blight are pondering on something.

Two nickels

[fallen-down-slowed-down]

🎀... crushes !

(warning: 150+ crushes)

🎀books

Edward Hyde – Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde ( book + musical )

Holden Caulfield – The Catcher in the Rye

Košečkin Toporkov – Čekhov’s short stories

雨村 (Yucun) – Dream of the Red Chamber

🎀films/series/tv shows

Akutarō Shindo – Bucchigiri?!

Alador Blight + Darius Diamonne (poly) – The Owl House

Bandit Heeler – Bluey

Basil – The Great Mouse Detective

Captain Harlock – Captain Harlock ( anime + film (2013) )

CatRat – Gabby’s Dollhouse

Charles Bingley + Fitzwilliam Darcy – Pride and Prejudice (2005)

David – Camp Camp

Debra5000 + Eric – The Mitchells vs the Machines

Dragon King – The Monkey King

Ebisu – Nuragami

Eda Clawthorne – The Owl House

Edric Blight – The Owl House

Emile Petit + Francœur + Raoul – Un Monstre à Paris

Ezra – Captain Harlock (2013)

Father – Codename: Kids Next Door

Fukuo – Kiki’s Delivery Service

Gramorr – LoliRock

Guido – Luca

Hans – Frozen

Ichabod Crane – Sleepy Hollow (2013-2017)

Ichiya – Bucchigiri?!

John Darling + Slightly – Disney’s Peter Pan

Kabal – Mortal Kombat

Kakeru Zabu – Bucchigiri?!

King Dice – The Cuphead Show!

King Magnifico – Wish

Kristoff – Frozen

Kuzko – The Emperor’s New Groove

Loid + Yor Forger (poly) – SpyxFamily

Louis – UglyDolls

Louis Mérante – Ballerina

Marito Jin – Bucchigiri?!

Mephisto – LoliRock

Metro-spider – Spiderman: Across the Spider-verse

Morton – The Owl House

Nicholas Wolfwood – Trigun ( anime + manga )

Nico – Rio duology

Ozzie – Over the Hedge

Prince Naveen + Tiana (poly) – Disney’s The Princess and the Frog

Ryan – Sing 2

Sandman – Rise of the Guardians

Scientist (nnic) – Spiderman: Across the Spider-verse

Silencer + Truth – Miraculous: les Aventures de Ladybug et Chat Noir

Spike Spiegel – Cowboy Bebop

Suki – Sing 2

Tarrant Hightopp – Alice in Wonderland (2010-2016)

Ted Shackleford – Curious George

Tsukasa Shishiō – Dr. Stone

Valentino – Wish

Victor – Ballerina

Waymond Wang – Everything Everywhere All at Once

William Dalton – Les Dalton (2010-2015)

🎀videogames

Achilles – Alchemy Stars

Adras – Alchemy Stars

Angus Ciprianni – That’s Not My Neighbour

Arlecchino – Genshin Impact

Baizhu – Genshin Impact

Beretta – Alchemy Stars

Beverly – Alchemy Stars

Boothill – Honkai Star Rail

Brock – Alchemy Stars

Caleb – Alchemy Stars

Capitano – Genshin Impact

Casta – Alchemy Stars

Chenya – Twisted Wonderland

Chevalier Michel – Ikemen Prince

Clavis Lelouch – Ikemen Prince

Comte de Saint-Germaine – Ikemen Vampire

Corax – Alchemy Stars

Cuscuta – Alchemy Stars

Diavolo – Obey Me! duology

Divus Crewel – Twisted Wonderland ( videogame + manga )

Fleur – Alchemy Stars

Francis Mosses – That’s Not My Neighbour

Genevieve – Alchemy Stars

Jack Howl – Twisted Wonderland ( videogame + manga )

Jamil Viper – Twisted Wonderland ( videogame + manga )

Jean d’Arc – Ikemen Vampire

Joselyn – Alchemy Stars

Kleken – Alchemy Stars

Leon Dompteur – Ikemen Prince

Leona Kingscholar – Twisted Wonderland ( videogame + manga )

Leonardo Da Vinci – Ikemen Vampire

Licht + Nokto Klein – Ikemen Prince

Lilia Vanrouge – Twisted Wonderland ( videogame + manga )

Ludovico – The Arcana

Malleus Draconia – Twisted Wonderland ( videogame + manga )

Mephistopheles – Obey Me! duology

Michael – Alchemy Stars

Minos – Alchemy Stars

Mozus Trein – Twisted Wonderland ( videogame + manga )

Nails – Alchemy Stars

Napoleon Bonaparte – Ikemen Vampire

Naroxel – Alchemy Stars

Nazali Satrinava – The Arcana

Neuvillette – Genshin Impact

Pantalone – Genshin Impact

Pittman – Alchemy Stars

Praetor Vlastomil – The Arcana

Pyro – Team Fortress 2

Quaestor Valdemar – The Arcana

Nadia Satrinava + Portia Devorak (poly) – The Arcana

Rebecca – Alchemy Stars

Rui Kamishiro – Project Sekai

Sam – Twisted Wonderland ( videogame + manga )

Sebek Zigvolt – Twisted Wonderland ( videogame + manga )

Silver – Twisted Wonderland ( videogame + manga )

Taki – Alchemy Stars

Theodorus van Gogh – Ikemen Vampire

Toya Aoyagi – Project Sekai

Tsukasa Tenma – Project Sekai

Vic – Alchemy Stars

Vil Schönheit – Twisted Wonderland ( videogame + manga )

Welt Yang – Honkai Impact 3rd

William Shakespeare – Ikemen Vampire

Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart – Ikemen Vampire

Zandik – Genshin Impact

🎀other type of source

Ace – Bungō Stray Dogs universe

Andrealphus – Hellaverse

Astr0 – Felix’s OC (his name has his social linked!)

Beelzebub – Hellaverse

Ben Solo / Kylo Ren – Star Wars universe

Black Cat + Witch Bunny – Witch Bunny

Carlos + Cecil Gershwin Palmer (poly) – Welcome to Night Vale

Chūya Nakahara – Bungō Stray Dogs universe

Daredevil – Marvel universe

Denver – So Not My Type ( webtoon by @ prollycarmen )

Ezekiel Sims / Spider-therapist – Marvel universe

General Grievous – Star Wars universe

Graziano – The Merchant of Venice

Kowalski + Rico – Madagascar universe

Lewis Pepper – Mystery Skulls Animated

Marchese di Forlipopoli – La Locandiera

Meta Knight – Nintendo universe

Miles Edgeworth – The Great Ace Attorney universe

Mr. Mistoffelees – Cats ( musical )

Mungojerrie – Cats ( musical )

Munkustrap – Cats ( musical )

Mushitarō Oguri – Bungō Stray Dogs universe

Paimon – Hellaverse

Projectile dysfunction bloke – Projectile Dysfunction

Shadow – Sonic universe

Shōta Aizawa – Boku No Hero Academia ( manga + anime )

Shylock – The Merchant of Venice

Sigma – Bungō Stray Dogs universe

Sin-eater – Marvel universe

Skimbleshanks – Cats ( musical )

Tayama Iida – Boku No Hero Academia ( manga + anime )

Turning a Sphere Outside In bloke – Turning a Sphere Outside In

Wally Wackford – Hellaverse

[ash-and-books]

Rating: 5/5

Book Blurb: In the stunning conclusion to the Elements of Cadence duology, A Fire Endless finds the delicate balance between the human and faerie realm threatened by Bane, the spirit of the North Wind, whose defeat can only come through fire, song, and heart-rending sacrifice.East and West. Humans and Spirits. Breccans and Tamerlaines. The Isle of Cadence has always held itself and its residents in a tenuous balance. But now Bane, the spirit of the North Wind, has pushed everyone and everything in his path off-kilter in a bid to claim dominion over all.In the West, Adaira struggles to adjust to the more brutal, bitter ways of life among the Breccans. Striving to find her place in the clan, she swiftly realizes that it just might be the last role she desires to hold. And while magic blooms effortlessly for the Breccans in the west, the spirits continue to suffer beneath Bane’s harsh power, felt in every gust of wind.In the East, Jack is adrift without Adaira until he sings to the ember-weak fire spirits, acquiring a dangerous mission he never expected. One that is destined to lead him westward. Likewise, Torin and Sidra are consumed by a new mystery as sickness spreads first amongst the crops, and then to the people of the Tamerlaine clan. While Sidra desperately searches for a cure, Torin dares to strike a bargain with the spirits—a precarious folly anytime, but especially now as the days grow darker.With the island falling further out of balance, humans and spirits alike will need to join together to face Bane, and Jack’s gift with the harp will be called upon once more. Yet no one can challenge the North Wind without paying a terrible price, and the sacrifice required this time may be more than Jack, Adaira, Torin, and Sidra can bear to pay.

Review:

The epic conclusion to the Elements of Cadence duology is finally here. Picking up where the first book left off, Adaira is struggling to adjust to the brutal and bitter way of life among the Breccans, she has been traded to live with her biological mother and father while her brother has been placed as prisoner in her stead, she must ajdust to life with the Breccans of the west in order to give peace to her home in the east. She has been separated from her husband, a bard named Jack, and yearns for him. Meanwhile Jack is adrift without Adair until he sings to the weak fire spirit... who gives him a dangerous mission that will lead him westward and into the dangerous home that Adaira lives in now. Meanwhile Adaira’s cousin Torin is now the laird of the Tamerlaine clan and he must find a way to stop the blight that is plaguing his people but soon finds himself tasked with solving a mysterious riddle trapped in the spirit world if he wants to get back to his healer wife Sidra and their family.... Sidra herself is hiding a secret... she is with child and has bene infected by the blight and must find a way to solve it before it’s too late. On top of all of this the spirit of the North Wind threatens to destroy the entire Isle of Cadence and Jack and Adaira must not only find a way to save their home but discover just how much they are willing to sacrifice for those they love... even if the price might be their own love after being reunited. This was a beautiful and wonderful conclusion to the duology and the romance really amped itself up in this book. I loved how strong Adaira was in this one and the journey of both couples was really well done. Each of the characters was given a well fleshed out storyline and they all wrapped up nicely. Adaira is tasked with not only creating a place for herself in a home she never knew, with people who say they are her family but she doesn’t see them as such, and deal with the politics of a whole new environment. She must navigate the loneliness and the dangers while staying strong and fighting for those she loves and her own values. Jack is lost, trying to find a way to be with the one person he loves while also trying to find what he wants his future to be. He has to journey through difficult paths and decide what he is willing to sacrifice for what he wants and where he sees himself being happiest. Torin finally has a home and family, he has everything he could have ever wanted... except now must deal with the burdens of ruling and caring for so many people, including his new family. Sidra is a healer who must deal with a heavy secret and find a way to save not only herself but those she loves. All of these characters have gone through a difficult journey and in the end all found a happy and beautiful ending. I would definitely recommend this series as it’s magical, romantic, and has a touch of folklore.

*Thanks Netgalley and Avon and Harper Voyager, Harper Voyager for sending me an arc in exchange for an honest review*

[stromuprisahat]

Nikolai would have preferred to wait for the thaw to make this trip, but reports of the blight had only grown more frequent, miles-wide patches of dead earth and ashen soil, men, women, and children struck down in the space of moments, scars that might never heal.  After the battle for Os Kervo, his trackers hadn’t been able to locate the Darkling. The followers of the Starless One still held their services, and a few had camped outside the palace walls to petition the new queen for the Darkling’s Sainthood. But the man himself had gone missing. Until one night they’d entered the war room in the Little Palace to find him slouched in his old chair, as if he’d never left.  Nikolai had reached for his guns, Tolya and Zoya had moved into combat stance. But the Darkling had merely rested his chin in his hand and said, “It seems that, once again, Ravka has a problem only I can solve.”  It was fair to say that problem was of the Darkling’s creation, but if he could be of assistance, Nikolai wasn’t going to argue. ...

Rule of Wolves (Leigh Bardugo)

What we learnt in Nikolai duology:

[aleksanderscult]

The Grisha always describe the “making at the heart of the world” as this powerful natural order that precedes all things. I’ve always been somewhat curious about how much truth there is to it. Obviously in the Grishaverse, Grisha are very much real. So is there a canonical magical origin story for the world? The Blight in the Zoya Duology is described as being a corruption of the natural order, a reversion to whatever existed before the making at the heart of the world. Grisha powers are inseparable from the person they belong to (ignoring Alina here) so it seems that maybe Grisha are more in tune with the making? But Saint Grigori the bear guy also said in KoS that he taught the first Heartrenders… so I’m confused about how this works. I feel like I’m missing something very important in the worldbuilding.

You feel like you miss something from the worldbuilding because the author hasn't written in detail how exactly the Grisha powers have come to be.

Heartrenders might already had their powers but Grigori taught them how to use them and manipulate them correctly possibly? (So what, does that mean that the first Heartrenders were stupid?)

Ravka seems to worship Saints, not Gods. Okay. But how did the first Grisha got his powers? Where did they come from?

The "making at the heart of the world" is the very root of every Grisha power which fundamentally means that they manipulate the matter around them but they cannot create it. They cannot create life. That's why Alina was shocked when she saw the Darkling creating nichevo'ya. But apart from that, nada.

Leigh has created a religion and a group with powers but has never dived deep to explain to the readers what the hell is going on. She has just thrown around some random words "making at the heart of the world", "merzost", "thisness" and "thatness", explained in a few sentences what each of them are but the readers are still confused because she has created more questions.

Really, even us (the fandom) don't know much and even the explanations we have are too confusing and sometimes contradict each other.

Tolkien had built an entire mythology before he even started writing "The Hobbit" but unlike Leigh he was a genius and had carefully planned his story.

[zevsarainai]

My final Thoughts on Rule of Wolves

(There isn't any structure in this post just my chaotic final thoughts)

Nikolai and Zoya will be the death of me. The fact that they didn't kiss until chapter 46 (which is one of the last chapters) is a crime

QUEEN ZOYA NAZYALENSKY IS ALL I EVER WANTED FROM THIS DUOLOGY AND I CAN'T STOP SCREAMING ABOUT IT

Still not over David and I don't think I ever will be

Loved to see Shu Han finally, loved that storyline, loved to see the experiments finally coming to a stop and Grisha finally gaining rights

While I think bringing the Darkling back was unnecessary, I get why Leigh Bardugo did it

I do think he was kinda useless in the entire book, besides at the end, tho I do have to say it's interesting to see everything from his perspective for once

Every cameo in this book felt like Leigh Bardugo just wanted to write every character one last time and while most of them might have seemed unnecessary too, I enjoyed every single one of them

Seeing Alina, Mal, Misha, Oncat and the crows again actually made me cry

Nina and Hanne deserve the world

I love Hanne so much, his experience as a trans man is so important to read about and I'm really glad LB added it

Good for him too finding a body he's kinda happy with even tho he had to kill a man for it

No one is gonna miss him tho, he really was a dick

Now about the ending, I think the storyline with the blights/shadow attacks was kinda rushed, I wished it took more than a chapter to resolve it, but I get why?

It seems that storyline isn't quite over yet since Zoya is planning on hiring Kaz Brekker (!!!!!!!!) to solve that problem permanently

Which I would be interested in reading about, if LB ever decides to write it

So overall, I really enjoyed it and it really feels like a solid finale to the grishaverse, even if it might be temporary

[popculturebuffet]

Ducktales: The Treasure of the Lost Lamp Movie Reviewcap! (Patreon Stretch Goal)

Hello all you happy people! And we have a special review today for two reasons. The first is that this is my second patreon stretch goal review, having hit the 15 dollar goal back in march thanks to my wonderful friend Emma, the same patreon whose responsible for the Green Eggs and Ham Reviews,  who helped me hit the 15 dollar goal.  As a result you fine people are getting three movie reviews each based on a Disney Afternoon Movie with Treasure of the Lost Lamp today, a goofy movie at the end of the motnh for  a weeklong tribute to my favorite dogmandadguy.  Extremley was going to be part of it but the length of this review convinced me otherwise, but I will be doing it this summer so keep an ear out. If you want to help me hit my next stretch goals do yourselve a favor and zip on over to my patreon YOU CAN FIND MY PATREON HERE. My next stretch goal at “OH Look 20 Dollars” would give everyone patreon and not, a monthly review of Darkwing Duck as decided by my patrons, reviews of BOTH season 2 mini series from Ducktales 87, introducing Fenton to the world and blighting it with Bubba before the 2017 series fixed him, and as a brucey bonus added last month a review of Danny Phantom the Ultimate Enemy. And if that wasn’t enough if you help me get to the goal after that at 25 unlocks another trilogy of disney film reviews, this time for the proud family and recess movie and the best kim possible movie, and dcom period, so the drama as well as Bryan Lee O’ Malley’s two stand alone graphic novels, lost at sea and seconds for you Scottaholics in the audience.

The other reason now the shilling’s done. is that the plan WAS to review this back to back with Treasure of The Found Lamp, to the point the orginal review had a whole thing about that, why it was delayed etc... but now that review’s been scrapped all together as something sudden and wonderful happened. After just kinda giving up someone came through with a translation of Della’s first apperance so presumibly i’ll be doing that as part of the build up to mother’s day, and since I still want ot do maternal instincts too, and already had to let the Floyd Gottfredson birthday special slide away as well... it had to go as I want to leave the only open space on the schedule for the lovely person who found the story for me. But this review is still done, i’m very proud of it so join me under the cut won’t you?

Behind The Scenes: Before I get into it i’d just like to note this article from SyFy Wire. It , along with articles I found via wikipedia citations, was an invaluable resource. 

The film was an experiment: It was an experiment to see if one of their tv properties could bring in theatrical money, to see if a movie made on a cheaper budget and still rake in decent money, to see if a film could be made being outsourced to several diffrent places, and to see what one of those places, their recently aquiried french stuido, could handle this kind of work. 

The film, if succesful would be the first of Disney’s MovieToons line, a series of films based on their shows. As you can tell by the fact only this movie and Goof Troop happened and the Movie Toons label wasn’t applied to that one it very much failed. While the film was warmly recevied by people who liked the show general audiences didn’t turn out for it. As a result the MovieToons label was scrapped, future projects with it were canceled.. but the stellar work put in by the french stuidio lead to it perserviering for several more decades and lead to them working on the Goofy Movie, which we’ll get to later this month but needless to say was a MUCH bigger hit with a much bigger budget. 

As for why the film failed... I have two theories. THe first is that parents were stupid back then and didn’t want to pay to see something on the big screen they could see on tv’s. This is a stupid mentality to me as generally a movie of a tv show puts in a ton of extra effort and usually goes bigger and dosen’t go home. It’s a likely theory given most liscened films of the era didn’t do quite well, with all three hasbro films tanking. And look I get Transformers the Movie is cheesy and killed a lot of people’s childhood toys, but damn if it ain’t aweosme.. and also something I need to cover at some point. Thankfully this died out by later in the 90′s with Rugrats getting a hugely succesful if flawed film, a better sequel and a third one that was also a crossover with the wild thornberries. 

And even now in 2020 we’re getting the Loud House and Rise of the TMNT movies sometimes this summer, we were SUPPOSED to have gotten the bobs burgers movie this summer but arne’t because Disney is being a dick about it.

And we got a phineas and ferb movie last year. With this trend hopefully thsi means we’ll get a Ducktales 2017 movie at some point since season 4 left a huge sequel hook laying right there to grab for a feature film.  One final note: The film was conceptually thought up as a 5 part serial like “Treasure of the Golden Suns”, “Catch as Cash Can”, “SuperDucktales” and “Time is Money, something that DOES show as the movie weirdly has act breaks. In a feature film. Yup. 

The Guest Cast:

I won’t go into the full cast since I’ve sung Alan Young and Russi Taylor’s praises PLENTY on this blog before, and I plan to go into Beakly and Launchpad’s actors when they show up in the pilot movie. But i’d be remiss if i didn’t talk about our three guest actors for our three new parts. 

First up is Merlock voiced by legend and if I had a hall of fame, hall of famer Christopher Lloyd.. I need to get me one of those. Lloyd is of course known for playing Doc Brown in back to the future but has done countless other films, voicework, and other good stuff. Among his MASSIVE filmography includes The Back to the Future Trilogy (Already mentioned it but it bears repeating), Star Trek III, Who Framed Roger Rabbit as the pants destroyingly terrifying Judge Doom, The Addams Family duology as fester, a role rip torn would ironcially play for the animated series made to captalize on said movie, Hey Arnold! The Movie, The Oogieloves in The Big Ballon Adventure (Look everybody needs money sometimes okay?), and Art of the Deal: The Movie, which was not, thankfully an ego filating nightmare made by trump himself but a film made by funny or die parodying his terrible book and having Llloyd return as Doc Brown. TV Wise he’s known for Taxi, Back to the Future the Animated Series, Cyberchase and he most recently popped up on Big City Greens. How I missed that ep I.. do know as I haven’t watched season 2. Gonna fix that later this month. Lloyd is utterly awesome, a great guy and thankfully still alive at the time of this writing, so I was happy to have him here. 

Less familiar to me but still known is Rip Taylor, a comedian known for his flamboyant unique way of speech and his marvelous mustache. He showed up in things occasionally and always seemed like the nicest guy and his passing in late 2019 truly is sad. He does a terrific job here but more on that in a moment. 

Finally we have Richard Libertini, a comedian I never really saw in anything besides this who according to IMDB was most famous for his ablility to do a foreign accent. I REALLY hope all of them aren’t as horribly racist as this one. We’ll.. get to that in a sec as it’s time for the plot!

A Treasure Uncovered:

We open our film gorgeously. The animation is great in the film, having some rough edges I chalk up to the film’s hectic production, the studio being new at working at disney properties, and the film not being meant for HD. That being said a few rough spots here and there aside.. the film looks ungodly gorgeous. Like most theatrical films based on a cartoon it takes an already great style and makes it look great. It feels like a more fluid evolution of the cartoons look and it’s a shame we didn’t get more movies in this style for both this show and others, ESPECIALLY Darkwing Duck. Can you imagine a Darkwing Duck movie with this lush animation? Hopefully we’ll get one eventually. 

So our heroes are going to somewhere in the Middle East. That’s.. that’s all wikipedia gives me and all the film gives me. As usual Scrooge is after treasure in this case the Treasure of Collie Baba, the greatest thief there ever was based obviously off Ali Baba from 1001 nights and that one Beastie Boys song. 

It’s here we find the WORST thing about the film, the thing that makes this a hard one to watch depsite otherwise being pretty good, and that makes my skin crawl knowing i’m a white man and a BUNCH of white guys, Ducktales series creator who did the voice casting for this character, the writers who wrote him, the direector disney them fucking selves who thought this was okay. 

The film has some horrible steroytping. It starts with a bunch of backgorund guys surronding Scrooge, with crooked teeth and steotypical voices. This on it’s own is odious. 

It somehow gets worse. Then we meet one of our antagonists. We meet Dijon. 

This Fucking Guy 

Djon is horribly offensive reminding me of other such luminaries in being ungodly offensive yet somehow getting put to film as Jar Jar Binks (With all respeect to his poor actor Ahmed Best, this is not his fault), Rob Schinder as a Sterotypically asian preist, Skids and Mudflap, Rob Schinder as a sterotypically mexican bandit, The Whitewashed cast of The Last Airbender, and Rob Schinder as a stereotypically asian preist. What i’m saying is Djon is an AWFUL, horribly offensive character.. and that Rob Schinder should be shot up into space, not to watch cheesy movies, he’s not funny enough for that, but instead to be sent to a satlitie that’s liveable, but also filled to the brim with spring loaded boxing gloves. Just tons of boxing gloves that feel like getting punched by a heavewight boxer all hidden... they could hit his legs, his face, his nuts, his face and his nuts, the point is he’s in constnat pain unless he moves carefully. 

And lest you think i’m exaggerating for starters this is his design. 

It just screams “vaugely but sterotpyically middle eastern” along with cowardly. The fact he’s also a literal rat is just the icing on the cake made of broken glass, shrapnel and broken DVD’s of Transformers; Revenge of the Fallen. They say if you eat a reveng eof the fallen dvd John Tutoro appears at the foot of your bed and watches you while you sleep.. and by they I mean me. It was a bad bet. I got rid of him with some insese and a bribe of five dollars. 

Oh but that’s just design.. when he talks it’s MUCH worse. His voice is like if they took Apu from the simpsons and said “This but MORE offensive”, and his perosnality is WORSE. He’s a thief.. and not in the endearing loveable rogue way but he’s a pick pocket and a running “Gag’ is that he’ll often grab eveyrthing within reahc. As the deisgn shows he’s a coward running at every opportunity. Oh and to top it all off he’s the willing servant of the white coded, given all ducks in this series are white coded and voiced bby white actors, big bad. And the actor is naturally VERY white to make this cocktail of offensivness so complete that if Disney ever got rid of this film I GUARANTEE the republcian party would be running in with accusations of cancel culture gone amok and never shutting up about this like they did the muppets. Which for the record THEY DIDN’T CANCEL THEM, YOUR POINT IS ILLEGITMATE, THEY JUST WANTED TO BE SENSTIVE YOU GHOULS. 

I do have a reason for bringing up Disney’s content warnings... most damming of all given just how DEEPLY uncomfortbale this character is.. there isn’t one for this movie. I double checked: There isn’t even wanring notes on the website. It’s just.. on there. And given just how ghastly a sterotype Djon is.. that’s not right. Seriously they DID put them on certain episodes of the show, theyk now this sort of thing is wrong and they done wrong.. but for NO reason they haven’t done so for a film released 31 years ago. Around the same time as the series and just offensive as that show at it’s worst if not more so. This is flatly inexcusable.. par for the course for Disney’s incompetence but still horribly furstrating, disgusting and shameful.. which has been the theme of the last three days really. I expect better because when it comes to putting that warning label on this stuff, they usually are better. First the scheduling mixup and now this. You already do a handful of things wrong Disney why add this to the list?!

It’s just draining not only to run into another Disney Fuckup after a weekend of dealing with one of their worst in recent memory, but just to watch Djon. To see this horrible caractrure saunter onto the screen and go on with his harmful schtick, to see that THIS is what Ducktales 87 reduced non white people to more often than not.  It’s remarkable just how throughly and awesomely Frank and Matt completely and totally reversed this. Instead of horrible sterotypes in the reboot, we got TONS of loveable people of color, an endearing latino hero, a smart african american buisness woman who takes no shit but is still a consumate professional, and an egyptian HERO with an intresting story and a strong moral code instead of this horrible reminder that racisim in media was such an afterthought not ONE person brought this up during the scyfy wire stuff or in any inteview i’ve seen. No one cared. Djon was POPULAR enough that he got three episode sin the series. THREE FUCKING EPISODES. This film could be GOOD.. but it’s just so bogged down EVERY FUCKING TIME this artists interpreitation of what Tucker Carlson sees when he looks at a middle eastern person I had to pause to compose myself and had to take a break writing this review to avoid tyiping this in all caps and using the phrase YOU RACIST MOTHERFUCKERS every other sentence. And again i’m white, I get this is second hand offensiveness.. I do... but it dosen’t mean I can’t be offended other white people were so callous about other cultures behaviors this happened.

And what makes me feel worse.. is that I just sorta... never thought about white people voicing non white characters. Things like this I noticed sure, I realize now part of the reason I didn’t like this movie the first time I saw it was this alex jones version of a looney tune, but I do feel shame for not noticing or caring long before this. Sure I loved it when a character of color got played by a person of color.. but I didn’t realize just how deep that problem was and how LONG it went on for before the outcry post george floyd and the call to action lead to most shows still going course correcting. It’s why stuff like this extra botehrs me: because THIS was just as okay at the time. No one blinked twice about this and odds are the creators involved still haven’t. And that.. that’s just terrible and it hurts to think about and  I still have most of the movie to go.  

The Pyramid of Peril:

So we do get a gorgeous unvewling scene of a box Scrooge found out about from Collie Baba’s horde that should lead them to the treasure. This scene reminds me of Indina Jones.. and I bring this up because the poster was specifically made to mimick an indinia jones poster, to the point of getting drew struzan to do it. THe creator of Ducktales objected..l but I do not get WHY. While I”m not sure if he had yet, Speilberg flat out admits the Carl Barks comics were an inspiration for Indina Jones, with the iconic bolder chase coming from a similar scene in one of Barks Stories. Gotta cover that too. So yeah I don’t get not wanting an indina jones style poster when both were inspiried by the same work and it’s just simple logic and it looks so neat. Thank you. 

Scrooge finds seemingly just clothes.. and a map. Jeff Dunham’s Most Racist Puppet reports to his master, Merlock. Merlock is a.. meh villian. Christopher Lloyd does try.. but Lock is your standard evil overlord wants to take over the world type. He dosen’t have much depth, or personality and only his style saves him from dragging the film down along with Dana Carvey’s most racist disguise in master of disguise. He does have a deent shape shifting gimick and being played by Christopher Lloyd means he’s acted TREMENDOUSLY. Alan Young was apparently in awe watching him work and that’s wonderful to hear. The guy did his best. Weirdly Merlock would show up in tons of other works, mostly video games.. but even weirder he NEVER showed up in ducktales 2017. Both Djon and Gene would, Djon thankfully renamed we’ll get to all of that tommorow thank god. I need it after this. But Frank has outright said they didn’t use Merlock because there simply wasn’t anything they could do with him they couldn’t dow ith magica. My likely guess is the might of found a way to revamp him EVENTUALLY, it’s not like radical revamps weren’t there thing come on, they just had way more stories with Magica and didnd’t get around to it before the show was canceled. Just make him some sort of evil god or something. it’s what I might do. There’s a lot of angles with him. Though I would’ve still gotten christopher lloyd back. I mean most of the recasting is good but he’s still alive and deserved a better shot at things. 

So Merlock sends Djonn to go with scrooge as his guide to find the treasure, as there’s something of imense power within it. And I gotta ask WHY does Merlock need a minon. No really. This isn’t a situation like reboot magica where he’s trapped in another realm. He can shapeshift into any animal. We only see him use falcon, rat, cockroach and bear but theoritically he can become anything and bear alone is still a LOT. Why does he need this sterotype even other sterytopes ar eashamed of? The film dosen’t NEED Djonn. Just let Christopher Lloyd monologue and leave this post 911 propogranda cartoon at home. 

So our heroes nad rejected jar jar prototype head into the desert, and seemingly find nothing before finding a small pyramid all while Merlock follows desecretley as a mighty hawk. 

Scrooge makes the boys and Djon dig... because they clearly forgot the “work hard” part of his ethos. 

Our heroes unveil the pyramid... and while Merlock SAYS he searched the desert and I get it’s hard to see thourgh all of that.. the dude is immortal, had decades to search and had Mickey Rooney there on standby to force him to go comb the desert. I have an artist rendering of that hang on

So our heroes enter the pyramid and it goes.. really how you’d expect: there’s a bunch of traps our brave explorers have to pass, the boys minintpret a juinor woodchuck saying about loosing your marbles to mean using the ones they actually have which geninely comes in handy as they trip the traps and Rob SChinder as a carrot stumbles into one. Also launchpad is wearing a hawaiin shirt and shades. This has no baring on the plot, but it does bring the movie up a notch in my book and I question why the reboot never used this outfit. Then again they also never properly used Donald’s Quack Pack Outfit (Which bad show or not, is objectively awesome), or his Quack Shot Indiana Jones Riff Outfit, so  it’s not like there isn’t a presdecnt for not giving a character a cool costume change from a previous medium. I really should do a top 12 missed opportunities list for the 2017 cartoon.. the ideas for stuff are really piling up. 

OUr heroes eventually find the treasure which has insidiously clever security the more I think about it: at first I thought it had none, just a pit with some... scorpions? I mean their supposed to be but they look like they crawled out of the same stygian hole in the sky Doofus crawled out of. And if your asking me “wait which Doofus” the answer is both. Both these abominations crawled out of a stygian hole in the sky.

But the treasure is on a platform surrounded by scoprions with the only way out being the trap filled way they came in. Unless someone comes in with a full team and a bunch of lootin sacks, they aren’t getting out with EVERYTHING. They can steal SOME of the treasure but there’s no way to get any signifigant portion... and the team thing itself is an issue, something Collie defintely predicted being a thief himself: while some thieves can work well as a team, hence why we have four oceans movies 3/4 damn good, and for the record 12 is the bad one, 8 is how you do a soft reboot and a female led reboot right, a good chunk of professional crooks will turn on each other or try and swinldle... and tha’ts dangerous in a trap filled temple but hey some criminals ain’t so smart.  If they all were Rudy Gulliani wouldn’t have two razzies for preparing to pull his pants down, and have waved his phone around on tv like a dare for future adminstrations to arrest the shit out of him would he? 

But Scrooge has his family so they get loading. But not before Webby finds the lamp. Not knowing about it Scrooge has no intrest in it, but Webby does. We also get a really simple but hilarious gag where SCrooge dickers over the idea for a second.. before Webby picks up a Jeweled tiara to possibly take instead. The best gags to me are often the ones that just let the character’s perosnalities take the lead and bounce off each other. It’s why when I reviewed the four lilo and stitch crossovers recently I harped on character interaction as their biggest weakness: it’s what MAKES a good work for me. It’s why my faviorite comics and shows often follow a loveable group of disfunctional misfits. I like a group of big personalities who despite in theory should NOT be able to work making it work anyway. And it’s honeslty what’s made Scrooge last so long: Scrooge on his OWN is awesome.. but iwth the boys, donald, and in the case of this series and the reivival Webby and Launchpad, with people to bounce off of who he contrasts heavily with, from Launchapd’s buffonery to Webby’s inehrent sweetness in both versions, to the boys genuine honesty and sense of adventure.... it makes him truly stand out. He’s a great character on his own, don’t get me wrong.. but it’s the people around him that give him chances to show WHY. A good character on it’s own is fine and dandy.. a good character with other good characters around them is where it gets truly special. 

Merlock naturally bursts in and in a VERY Black Heron move needlesly outs what micheal bay sees when he closes his eyes as a bad guy... no really he grabs the guy with his talons as he captures the treasure and reveals he’s a bad guy. I don’t even get why keep Djonn alive. He’s done all Merlock possibly could’ve needed and Merlock is ruthless... this makes no sense and only happens because they need Djonn for later in the plot.

Our heroes barely escape, rafting out on the platform itself in a thrilling sequence.. but it’s the one right after that catches my attention. Scrooge utterly defeated, having searched for this treasure for forty years and unresponsive to everyone else. The anmation, coupled with the incomprable Alan young’s acting makes this the highlight of the film for me. Beneath the armor of wealth and skill.. is only a poor old man who just lost something he’s been chasing after most of his life. Scrooge tries his hardest not to be vunerable and both shows and the original comics all use that so when he truly is devistated like this, and i’ts belivible since this treasure is a personal goal of his and as someone who has had things that they seek out specifically, loosing them always hurts. It hurts to ALMOST reach a goal only to have it crumble out under you

But while this alone is good.. what’s next makes it great. Webby sweetly offers up the lamp. Scrooge turns it down, and her genuine gesture reinvgorates him and reminds us of who he is “I’ll find it if it takes another 40 years”> Scrooge may be bitter, mean and selfish a lot of the time.. but deep down, he’s a good man and one who will not give up, and a momentary setback can only stop him so long as long as he has his family to remind him of who he truly is.. and what’s truly important. It’s genuinely sweet and to me is also a reminder of why 87 Webby is a good character: Shes’ not perfect, her main personality trait is often Girl Sterotype”.. but she’s a genuinely sweet small child with a huge heart. It’s telling that while 17′ Webby is almost completely diffren,t and far better, that heart remains her biggest strength. Sure her reboot self could kill a man nad no one would ever find the body, but it’s her heart and empathy that makes that possible and makes her Webby.  That inherent loving nature is what makes Webby webby wether she’s a toddler having a tea party or a tween getting ready to intergoate a guy with a meat tenderizer while saying ‘Cute girl stuff”. 

Gene Genie Let’s Himself Go:

It’s a few days later and this is the point where it REALLY becomes obvious this was written as a bunch of episodes. Though to the film’s credit while it does ake this feel like a compliation movie as a result... it dosen’t hamper the film’s quality, condiment from Rush Limbaghs’ hot dog stand does that just fine, but once you notice it it’s impossible to unotice it. Weirdly though it seems chunked up into four episodes rather than the usual five, likely cutting down an episode, though I can’t see where they cut out material frankly if they did and i’ts just as likely they woudl’ve had to make one to fill in the space.

So Scrooge is in a mood, being grumpy with his secretary Mrs. Featherly, quackfaster in all but name, and having to be sent home. So while Duckworth goes to fetch him Webby polishes her treasure at long last readying for a tea party, something the boys roundly reject because their sexist little twits and swo were the writers or executies who assumed all little boys act the same. It’s easily my biggest pet peeve with the series as a whole: anytime this crops up with the boys it turns them into the worst dicks imaginable. It’s telling this, being mean about her wantin ga tea party with her surrogate brothersi s TAME. Normally they’ll say she can’t do things because she’s a girl or mock her hobies outright instead of just be mildly dickish. And while she dosen’t look much younger Webby is VERY CLEARLY, in this series anyway, supposed to be say 5 or 6 to the boys 8-10. 7 at most. SHe’s a small child and while it is realistic for older kids to bully younger ones, it’s not fun to watch. It’s why I get annoyed at all the big sibling bully characters.. some work, but most aren’t fun to watch because there’s nothing funny or intresting about it. It’s the same deal here. 

Thankfully that quickly goes away as the lamp moves when Webby rubs it and does so again to prove it did move. Huey finishes it and we’re introduced to Gene, the best part of the film.  Gene is a Genie and he takes a second to dart around before messing with the appliances in the kitchen, as he was last around during the time 1001 Nights Came About. Cleverly though, and so we thankfully don’t have 80 dozen fishout of water jokes that have already been done before. As you can probably guess i’m not a huge fan of time travel fish out of water stuff. Now from another dimensoin or planet, i’m on board with with Star Vs, Steven Universe and Sym-Bionic Titan being great examples of this, as is the comic resident alien. (Despite having the wonderous Alan Tuduk the show sounds way more mean spirited and misses the entire point of the comic as given by the author in the credits, i.e. that the alien is supposed to NOT be a threat and just be gently waiting for a ride) The inverse is also good with Amphbia and owl house, taking a human and plopping them into our world. But time travel stuff just usually runs the same beats of “look at the shiny thing” and what not. The only time i’ve sene something SIMILAR work is with thor where their society is SIMILAR to vikings time but still it’s own thing.. it also gave us a classic gag in..

So yeah i’m glad they dropped this and instead had a clever way around it: Gene reads the encylopedia at the mansion. Granted it’s Scrooge so I don’t know how current it is and given this came out in 1990 thus HOW racist it is. It’s not a questoin of IF it was, but how much.

But having caught up the kids confront him with the fact he has to grant wishes. This lamp runs on what I now realize are Aladdin rules: Whoever currently holds the Lamp is the Genie’s master, they only get three wishes, and that dosen’t reset if it changes hands. The only big diffrence from the usual is Gene dosen’t have to TELL them about the wishes like Genie did, and Gene very begrudginly agrees to it. He also seem’s phsyically pained when doing so. 

So since all 12 know about him, each of the kids gets a wish though it seems unfair with HDL. Their one person, they shoudln’t get 9 wishes just because their brain is spread out over three bodies. 

This film continues the weird simliarties to Aladdin by attaching rules though they instead come up as a result of our heroes talking rather than the Genie just flat out tleling them: both share the “you can’t wish for more wishes” thing, a common rule in these stories and usually only broken nowadays as a clever twist as the rule is SO common place, not having it is a twist. But it is there for a reason: to limit the sheer power of a reality warping wish. The wishes can also only go so far. In a nice line, when Huey, Dewey or Louie suggests wishing for peace one earth, Gene says “No pipe dreams’ He can’t bend people or reality on THAT scale. He can bend reality as we find out, but it’s smaller scales like turning someone’s possesions over ot someone else, warping the bin into a castle, or bringing inanitamte objects to limited life. Still HUGE feats worth of a genie, so Gene’s power isn’t so nerfed it’s unusuable, but it does explain why his evil pervious ownder Merlock, more ont hat in a bit too, didn’t just wish to have eternal dominon over the earth or something. Gene can do just about anything but he can’t change the world on a fundemental level. 

And I do LIKE having rules in wished based stories like this, I chalk it up to growing up with Fairly Odd Parents... though they eventually went too far in the oppsoitie direction, pulling rules out of their ass to suit the episode, instead of simply having some very standard, very understandable rules that still pose challenges but don’t outright cheat so the episode can happen. 

So Webby does her first wish.. and wishes for a Baby Elephant, something Gene is against as he prefers they keep the wishes small: otherwise he gets found out, and the fight over him begins. So one of the boys wishes him away. Or Webby does. Point is it’s gone though not before Beakly sees it and Scrooge smells something is up. Our heroes try to hide gene, but gene thankfully simply dresses up like a modern kid and thus is able to pass as a friend of there staying for the night. 

So with the rules established and what not the kids find a clever solution: they simply go a ways away from the mansion into the woods, far enough from town to avoid any suspcion, and same iwth the mansion and just wish for all kinds of stuff: a giant bunch of ice cream toys, standard kid wish fufillment but it’s nice... in part because the kids treat Gene like one of them. Wihle they STARTED asking him about the wishes, this starts the bonding process. Soon he will be part of the hive mind.. SOON. 

Until then though after using another wish to make scrooge not mad at them for coming home late and missing dinner, that night we find out Gene’s backstory.... and it’s an utter tearjerker. As it turns out Merlock wants him back because he’s Gene’s former master and as you’d guess.. it was NOT a happy existnace, used contstnatly to do horrible things with no power to stop himself. Pompeii and Atlantis were both directly Merlock’s fault and it was only Collie Baba stealing the lamp that put an end to his hell. He also answers the two obvious questions botht he audeiince and the boys have: How the hell is Merlock still alive and shoudln’t he be out of wishes then? The first is simple. Unlike pretty much every DBZ Villian whose WANTED to do so, Merlock wished for immortality first chance he got, taking the Zamasu route instead and thus leaving him free. 

As for the wishes thing it turns out his amulet, in adition to shapeshifting, also gives him extra wishes becuase fuck it. 

But the boys sweetly offer to protect him. 

The next day, Apu’s Cousin let’s Merlock know the maps in the mansion and Merlock has him help sneak in with Merlock taking rat form. This backfires as Mrs. Beakley notices the form and chases after him with a broom

Meanwhile Webby has her tea party with Gene after he and the boys played cops and robbers earlier, and he’s bored.. though nicely not because it’s a girly thing, but because the stuffed animals aren’t alive and she naively has him fix that. This leads to 

Which sadly is jsut scrooge vs a duck toy but admit it, you want that movie for Disney Plus yesterday. Call Charles Band Disney. CALL CHARLES BAND! 

Whelp Scrooge Still Sucks:

Scrooge takes for a turn for the obnoxious in the next part, but i’ts fine by me as it’s part of the plot. Naturally this reinactment of Cult of Chucky has lead to Scrooge finding out about the Genie. To his credit, Scrooge is tactical about his wishes. As said by the Duck himself “I could wish for a diamond, no the world’s biggest dimaond, no ten world’s biggest diamond, no a diamond mind, no the MINING INDUSTRY!”

The sheer power this gives him is TERRIFYING, both because of his status.. and because unlike the kids who all wished for simple kid stuff and used up their wishes quickly, he both gets how much he can do with this and could conquer the world economy if he truly wanted to. 

The obnoxious part comes in as he treats Gene as not a person, figuring he’s just there and forces him into the lamp despite the kids protests after Gene grants his first wish: Collie Baba’s treasure. It also dosen’t feel like the wishing nor him using the lamp to get the tresure back goes against his hard work ethos: for the former while he is getting all this magically, he’s still having ot use his wits to get the most out of it, and he did earn the lamp itself square. For the latter, he already earned the treasure square too and had it stolen. He’s onlyg etting back what’s by all rights HIS. Granted he plans on giving most of it up for a tax break but still it’s his by right. 

However the reason his assholery works is twofold: first it’s Scrooge. While he’s not a TERRIBLE person, in the comcis and this cartoon he isn’t a GOOD person either. He DOES have a good heart and will usually do the right thing, but his first instnct is always to get more money and to be a cantakerous old bastard to eveyrone and everything. While he’s subtly grew out of “I hate eveyrone and everyone hates me” as his guiding principal, it’s still his defualt reaction to most situations. But he first relents by letting Gene attend the party, part of why the Collie Baba thing stung so bad was that he’s told the historical society he’d get the treasure for years only to come back empty handed, if shrunken. But he still manages to have a good time while Asok and Merlock infiltrate.. well I’mRunningOutofINsultingNIcknamesCanYouTell steals the silverware. Yes... that.. that really happens. 

Look we’re almost done, i’m almost free of this racist mummies curse. Let’s continue. Gene sees melock and freaks and drags SCrooge with him and while at First Scrooge is cranky...

No but now I want a Donkey Kong Country crossover too dammmit. And to talk about those games. Another thing for the list. But Scrooge is righ tot be a bit surly...

Okay now your just pushing it. As Gene whisked him away without telling him anything other than vauge worries... but then he gets a full idea of why Gene’s so terrified when Merlock shapeshifts into a bear and starts breaking the door down. Eh, could be worse. 

Gene shrinks them to escape and Merlock leaves thinking they fled but leaves Skids Minus Mudflap to go look for them. Scrooge sneaks out but bumps into a cart running from the photo you see when you look up stereotype on google. I mean I assume.. let’s try it. 

Huh you know I HOPED but I never expected... 

So Google Proving My Point plans to give his lamp to the master because of his weird Torgo-Esque obession with helping a man who clearly wants to murder him but takes his sweet time doing so because plot, and Gene figuring this COULDN’T POSSIBLY go as bad as Melock getting him urges the dummy to keep him and make his own wishes.

This goes about as well as you’d expect....

Wiped Out With A Wish:

Scrooge returns home to find Watto has wished to take his poessions, fortune, everything and Scrooge gets thrown in jail for breaking into his own house. We get two great moments back to back. The first is Scrooge lamenting loosing his fortune in jail, and realizing the sheer power and risk of the lamp, especially since he worked hard to earn it, every bit of it.. and Sam Wilson’s 70′s Backstory came in and took it all in an instant. 

The second is Scrooge’s family coming for him, including Launchpad , Beakly and Webby obviously and bailing him out. Though Beakly is UNGOLDLY annoying in this scene, sobbing hysterically and adding nothing and it’s not nearly as funny as the  film thinks. Turns out Goliath getting buried wrapped in chains threw them out. 

Scrooge takes a bit to rebound from all this.. but eventually realizes something: he knows the security of the bin inside and out. He had it put in after all. So it’d be easy enough to break in. So they gotta break in to break out the lamp, undo this nightmare, and END THIS MOVIE. Seriously this review has taken two days  as is I do NOT want to miss my invincible review. 

So they break into the bin, and it’s a tightly paced Scene, scrooge going in one way while the kids go the other and we even get a nice callback as the marbels come in handy to get past one of the traps. It’s just a good scene. it’s only real flaw is that Launchapd just sorta disappears as does Duckworth despite the fact their in a plane, and the bin later gets turned into a floating castle. Kinda a plot hole to not have Launchpad crash in to save htem just saying. 

Scrooge eventually does get to Djonn, whose been ignoring the imminent threat of Merlock while Gene sweats it out... and this backfires horribly as Merlock hitched a ride as a roach (Though there was a hilarious scene of him getting fried constnatly by lasers when Louie went through a laser hallway, as while Louie had the directions, it dind’t take into account passengers on your head. 

So Merlock remanifests in full gets the Lamp and unleashes his wrath on Tin Tin in the Congo and turns him into a wild pig. 

Not you sweetie. He then forces Gene to turn the castle into a fortress and float it back to his home in parts unknown. It’s a DAMN cool scene with impressive and horrifiing animation as the bin melts and crumbles into thte castle and the kids barely make it up the stares as they shift and disolve. Really top notch stuff.

Scrooge stands up to Merlock... and this naturally goes poorlyw ith Gene begging Merlock not to respond.. and Merlock having him blow scrooge off the top of the forgtess storm eagle style, though scrooge understands. And this is the true reason why scrooge being a dick didn’t bother me so much. Because it helps create a great contrast between him and Merlock. Both thought of Gene as a tool rather than a person.. but Scrooge grew to realize he was wrong and what he was dealing with wasn’t some magical goodies creator.. but a child forced to constantly grant wishes, in sheer agony to do so no less, likely so sick of it because again and again and again people used him as a slave to get what they wanted and to hell with what Gene wanted. He realized he was terrible for making this poor boy into his slave simply because that’s his job. In contrast Merlock could give no shits and is a malevolent monster who glefully uses Gene despite the pain the wishes put him through and his protests. It’s why Gene is the best part.. he’s  athroughly likeable, throughly inncoent character with tons of personality and a truly tragic and horrifying backstory and Rip Taylor acts the hell out of every scene with the guy. 

Thankfully the marbles come in handy one last time and Huey, Dewey or Louie snipes the lamp away and a struggle for it insues between Scrooge and Merloc mid air. it’s fucking awesome.. and it get sbetter in how scroogewins. He simply gets rid of Merlock’s amulet, taking it then throwing it. Grante dhe COULD’EVE used it for unimited wishes.. but it was too risky to do that and as we’ll see in the ending , Scrooge realized the Lamp was too powerful to keep around for much longer and too much of a tempting target for his rogues.. not that we see them this movie as the crew wanted it to bea ccesaible and thus kept hte cast to the main cast from season 1 and just made new vilians and a new supporting character, but still. 

He does use his second wish though to undue the damage Merlock had done and the bin and clan mcduck are returned to duckburg in good condition.

Time for our ending, which is genuinely and wholly touching. With the lamp too dangerous to use Scrooge considers just sending it to the earth’s core, which horrifies the kids as it’d mean Gene would be trapped there forever... if the molten lava iddn’t just outright destory the lamp and probably kill him. But Scrooge.. isn’t the bastard he likes to potray himself as. Instead he makes Gene into a real boy. He gives the poor kid HIS wish, which designrates the lamp and undoes all the spells... so Merlock is PROBABLY dead but he does return for some games so maybe not? 

And so we end on two things: Gene happily playing cops and robbers with the boys finally free.. and Birth of A Nation grabbing all the loot he can in his patns and running off. Ha ha ha thank god i’m done with this prick. And no I will not be looking at his ducktales episodes unless I have to. 

Final Thoughts:

This movie is OKAY. It has a solid plot, gene is a wonderful chacter, the animatoin is pretty prettay pretty good, and the voice acting as usual is excellent, with Rip Taylor being the standout. 

But as my paragraphs of rage shoud’ve made Clear Djonn is just BAD. Easily the worst character i’ve encountered in my year of reviewing and some of the worst writing i’ve ran into. And that writing includes a goblin man voyerstically forcing two teenagers to make out, making jokes about santa renaming himself Clem the sceneafter he tearfully confessed to letting the elves and ms. claus die, accidental transphobia via the u-men, and Bryan Lee O malley thinking we needed more than one volume of Julie Powers being around.  This was disgusting, even by 1990 standards and especially by 2021 standards and it drags the film down considerably. Without it the film is okay.. with it the film is just VERY hard to watch any time he pops up.  He made getting through the movie a nightmare and while I pause a lot becaue it’s a bad habbit I did so more simply because as I said earlier in the review I could not stand him. 

It makes it a hard film to recommend. If you can stomach the racisim, then it might be worth it, but be aware of what your putting up with going in. But if you can’t.. there’s no shame in that, it’s carbombya levels of bad. Which yes was a real fictoinal country. It was so bad Casey Casem quit transformers over it. True story. So yeah, it’s an okay film, on par with the series at it’s best for the most part.. but Djonn just spoils it for me. 

If you liked this review, like it, share it around that sort of thing and if you want MORE disney movie reviews, in addiiton to the goofy movie one later this month, if you help me hit my 25 dollar stretch goal on patroen.com/popculturebuffet, i’ll do reviews of the Recess, Proud Family and Kim Possible MOvies (Well so the drama anyway), so help me out would you and i’ll see you at the next rainbow.

[bigdreamsandwildthings]

Review: Rule of Wolves (Leigh Bardugo, King of Scars #2)

Rating: ★★★★★/5

“None of this had been fated; none of it foretold. There had been no prophecies of a demon king or a dragon queen, a one-eyes Tailor, Heartrender twins. They were just the people who had shown up and managed to survive. But maybe that was the trick of it: to survive, to dare to stay alive, to forge your own hope when all hope had run out.” I can’t stop smiling, but I have so, so many emotions. This is my favourite Grishaverse book, hands down. It's tautly-paced, beautifully written, emotional as all get out, and just...perfect. After the events of King of Scars, Nikolai and Zoya are facing a threat that they could have never anticipated, and the Blight continues to ruin Ravka, one piece at a time. Nina is undercover as Mila Janderstat, Hanne's lady in waiting, and continues to feed information on Jarl Brum and Fjerda to her friends back home. War is looming, and everyone has a part to play - including some familiar faces, both friend and foe. This just feels like the ultimate crossover novel in the Grishaverse. We get glimpses of characters that I didn't expect, at ALL, and others that factor quite intensely into the plot that left me clutching at the book and wanting to dive into it headfirst to hug them. I can't believe how invested I was, immediately upon opening this one; usually Leigh's books take some time to get moving, but with this one, that is so not the case. As always with her books, the writing here is absolutely top notch. The way Leigh uses language to capture the feeling of the scenes, and the minds of the characters, is brilliant; Ravka and Fjerda have such different feelings associated with them in my head, and it's all because of how she crafts them. To say I'm obsessed with her world-building is an understatement. Nikolai, Zoya, and Nina are my whole heart. I adore them for such different reasons; Nikolai is such a soft smart-ass, Zoya so fierce and unrelenting in her quest for victory, and Nina so soft yet so cunning and amazing. And Hanne! Oh my god. Nina and Hanne were standouts in this one for me, and I'm so ultimately satisfied with how things turned out. However, there were multiple moments where I YELLED because I couldn't believe what was happening. Out of nowhere! Shit! Goes! Down! And I absolutely live for that. Leigh likes to keep us on our toes, and boy is she good at it. Twists like that elevate books from great to my faves, and this was absolutely the case with this one, and this duology. I can't believe how much I loved this book. I hope we never stop getting novels set in this universe, and I can't wait to see my babies on my TV this weekend.

[nataliescatorccio]

sorry for bother but is Mal half-asian in the books? and did Alina and Mal end up together in the books? what happened to Kirigan? I know these are highly spoiler questions but I gotta know

i'll put this under the cut for major spoilers!

mal is not half-asian in the books and alina is not asian - the books seriously lack diversity and was one of the things heavily criticised about them, which is why the show made an effort to diversify. of all the s&b characters on the show so far only one is a poc in the books and that's zoya.

the ending of ruin and rising in the books is as follows (i say in the books because i really hope they change it, i loathe the ending): alina has been on a journey to get the three amplifiers (her antler collar is part of a trio) and they come to realise through a series of complex events that mal is actually the third amplifier. alina sacrifices him to get the rumoured full power of the three amplifiers which she believes she needs to destroy the fold. in a cruel twist, her power is taken from her and given to others - these new sun summoners let their powers shine and this destroys the fold finally. the darkling, seeing all this, is shocked at alina's sudden loss of power, alina stabs him with a blade and he dies. meanwhile, some of alina's friends perform merzost on mal and he comes back to life. after this, they pretend alina died on the fold and she leaves with mal to run an orphanage and live an ordinary life, but only seeing her friends once a year and without her powers.

after this, there's the nikolai duology, in which it turns out the darkling did not truly die on the fold. there are a whole series of events here that i won't go into, but in the end he (almost willingly) sacrifices himself in a ritual to save the lands from being blighted by a fold-like presence which was destroying ravka. he is effectively trapped in a tree with a thorn piercing his heard, trapped in a purgatory state of agony for all eternity.

[rhosynviteri]

I am. Living. Completely off of you, ainomica and Ambitious Witch because despite how much I utterly adored Ben Barnes (and can the man just. Get. A better fantasy show? Can we ever see him happily in an EtL pairing with a HEA?), the more I thought about the show and utter shitshow that the Zoya Duology is, the more my soul just. Burns. So basically: thank you three magnificents for putting into words what I simply could not express beyond "this has BAD VIBES"

Thanks! 😊

Everything this woman has written before and after (with the exception of The Language of Thorns) the soc duology has bad vibes. Even soc has some side-eyeing moments, but I still think she peaked there.

As for Zoya's duology, I wouldn't have minded reading books about her. In my opinion, she was one of the tgt characters who had a lot of potential. So my problem isn't Zoya, but LB herself. The damn duology had been marketed as NIKOLAI'S duology. Not Zoya's, not Nina's and not Ravka's (she is backtracking now and saying it was Ravka's duology all along. Liar).

And what we got? A sidelined Nikolai who reads more like the LI (in his own books!) , a bunch of irrelevant PoV's that made everything feel disjointed, and too many antagonists. From all this mess, the only character that felt like a MC was Zoya. She got the character arc, all the powers (grisha and political), her PoV was the last one of the whole duology. And Nikolai? His last chapter was wasted on the Darkling.

Oh and the Darkling!

He. Had. No. Business. In. Kos. Duology.

He was one of the few characters who I found interesting in the oh trilogy. Say what you want about him, but he moved the damn plot forward. However, he shouldn't have been brought back. I have yet to see his purpose besides going inside the tree, and even that could have been avoided if the blight part wasn't written. And he wasn't even the bad guy of that book. Yes, his past actions were constantly mentioned (makes sense), but in row he basically helped the main characters.

So many chapters were wasted on dumb stuff, when we could have gotten more Nikolai and more Zoyalai development (I love them by the way).

[bunnyandbooks]

King of Scars + Rule of Wolves by Leigh Bardugo

Otherwise known as the Nikolai duology. I’m a fan of the Grishaverse, so I was very excited to read the duology, especially since Nikolai was my favorite “suitor” from the original trilogy and I really liked Zoya, particularly after the TV series came out. But I’m sorry to say that these were a little bit of a slog to get through. Spoilery thoughts under the cut.

First, there’s a lot going on at any given time. The A plot alone contains two plots: Ravka’s impending war with Fjerda and the mysterious blight tied to the Darkling, who inexplicably returns. While well-written, it’s kind of messy and disjointed, with the Darkling subplot almost having no bearing on anything else in the book. Even worse, Bardugo dips into that trope I hate the most - where the main characters enter into a ~mystical~ pocket dimension to gain new, and usually unforetold powers, to help the plot along and handwave the rest. There’s no hint that the Fold had a rip to said pocket dimension before (the Heart of the World) and the spirits of the Saints and Darkling just residing in this place felt too overly convenient and mostly confusing because the Darkling plot had no bearing on the war plot ultimately. It was also frustrating because in comparison, the B and C plots, which were Nina’s undercover mission in Fjerda and the other sidestories of Issak dealing with Nikolai’s disappearance or Tamar/Ehri in Shu Han, were actually a lot of more interesting and felt more tightly written. It’s not until the end when you get the sense that the Darkling plot was shoehorned in for a Six of Crows sequel that you really got any idea of why it had to be there in the first place, but it would’ve been a much more interesting read if it didn’t feel like filler.

Second, much like the original Grisha trilogy, the story felt weighed down by romance. While I like Nikolai and Zoya as characters individually, at some point after the original books, we’re told that they had an attraction develop between them, but it didn’t feel like they had much chemistry together (contrast book!Alina and Mal, where it felt like it wasn’t a healthy relationship). Because the romance is already established and doesn’t grow, if you don’t like it at the beginning, there’s not much that’s going to change later, whereas seeing Nina and Hanne’s love blossom made them a much more engaging couple. I almost wish that Bardugo had made the more difficult choice and let Nikolai end up with Ehri through a political marriage: their dynamic was very interesting given that they are technically enemies, but have very similar goals for their respective countries, and Ehri showed some real promise of becoming a savvy politician. Makes me think she would have truly blossomed under Nikolai’s teachings.

Third, the ending was pretty obvious, which is not always a bad thing, but didn’t feel satisfying in this case. The book signals pretty early on that Zoya is meant for greatness, and once her dragon powers activated, I immediately went, “they’re going to make her queen, aren’t they.” Sure enough. The problem is, for all her power, she never really showcases that she would necessarily make a good queen, which she herself lampshades right before accepting the coronation. Her instinct is to fight because she’s a trained warrior and she thinks of herself as a warrior - it’s her own conception of her identity. She’s not very good at diplomacy or scheming, and she doesn’t show much compassion for her enemies for the most part. Strength is not only her forte, it’s her go-to weapon on anything she does. Whereas Nikolai is proven time and time again to be what one would hope a king would be: he’s forward-thinking, progressive, compassionate, and ultimately selfless when it comes to anything involving Ravka’s greater good. And while I know that the temptation is give female characters visible offices of power to show strength, it feels ill-fitting here and not so much of a triumph for Zoya.

I recommend the books to anyone who is a fan of the universe, but ultimately I think they don’t hold a candle to the Crows duology.