#blehjhhh

[uzi-x33]

“ur not dazai!!” literally me:

[commander-spaceboy]

I FORGOT TO POST PART 4,,,, ermmm eto blehjhhh

[imm-on-the-pursuit-of-happiness]

It's just so difficult to go though this trial in my life at this time in my life where I want to not be so worried about being sick and be more worried about being tired from partying with good friends and I just wish I knew why this was happening and I hate when my faith shakes and I'm trying to stay strong and keep praying I am trying and I just hate this so so much and I just wish it would go away and I've been able to be happy despite it but it's not always so easy when the pain is still there and I just want to know why I am sick. And I just don't understand and it's just so hard and I'm in college and hate having to rely on my parents I want to be able to support myself like my sister can and not have to call them when I'm in tears and not have to take medicine all the time and have the freaking doctors say I'm a drug addict...makes me so mad and I just hate this and I'm so excited to go home but I'm stressed and I just wish I had all the answers so I wouldn't have to have so much worry & doubt. & I just want to be with Merritt so badly oh my gosh and I just feel like he might not like me as much as I like him idk but I just don't wanna lose him oh my gosh or have him get bored of me cause that would be the worst thing but I know there are other guys but I'm just a loyal person && wouldn't want him to do anything with a girl there. & I just hope he misses me as much as I miss him & isn't all talk & I just wish we could talk on the phone more ughhhhhhh! But today was good like I was able to go to class & stuff & meet new people which is always nice & I went out with friends tonight which was nice & I got to watch mulan with friends haha. I love doing stuff with people & I just wish I didn't have to bail by being sick and I just wish someone would always be there to watch a movie with me when I'm sick ya know 😔 but yeah I just am frustrated and I'm trying not to be and I'm trying to be positive and I'm trying to be happy& I'm proud of me but it's just hard sometimes & ughhhhhh. 😔😔😔

[glitteringworlds]

Today sucks I'm taking a nap Maybe when I wake up I will feel good enough about my writing to start chapter two of my Eirika-as-Ephraim fic