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blcktime-epress · 6 years
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So my older sister hyped up this show on (Of all places) 'The History Channel'. So I thought "Oh, I guess I should check out the episodes on the Chicago gangs, the Compton gangs & the Hell's Angels. Looks educational. Instead, what I got is this! Gangland: These gangs are dangerous, they jerkoff to hentai & order books from Japan! (*Flash editing ensues) Me: Ummm. How did these gangs get so powerful? Gangland: This gang is so fucked up, the FBI said they were crazy!! (*Flashy editing, followed by gunshot sound FX with screaming guy sound & picture of a random dead body) Me: How do these gangs get their funding? Gangland: This gang is so fucked up, the FBI said they were crazy!! Me: You already said that!!! FBI: Yeah, we implanted crack in the inner cities. Me: Wait, what?!! Tell us more! Gangland: This gang is so crazy, they use the metric system so they call Quarter pounders 'Royales With Cheese'! Me: No, go back to that FBI guy! He said some pretty shady shit! (*Flashy editing followed by that same sound FX of gunshots & screaming guy with pictures of random dead people) Me: Educate me!!!! Gangland: Now here's IceT & Snoop Dogg to tell us about gangs. Snoop Dogg: Game of Thrones is real! Dragons existed! Me: Oh my god, he's out of it. Ice T: They crazy! Y'all only payed me to say two words. You wanted more, you should of hired Coolio for half the price. I'm out dis bitch! Gangland: Gangs are scary!!!! Deal with it, 'Murica! (Roll Credits) I just wanted to be educated without it being pandering or without any of that ADHD editing. Is that so hard?
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blcktime-epress · 6 years
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Old basketball players, old men with guns & a sorta isn't, but wouldn't it be cool if it was, sci-fi spinoff of an already beloved action hero. Those are the films Jebus forgot to talk about. All this & more on 'Blogababble'.
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blcktime-epress · 6 years
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Ceasar Milan’s Dog Whisperer (In a Nutshell)
Pet Owner: My dog is crazy! I tried nothing & I'm all out of ideas! Dog: I do what I want! Fuck all y'all! Cesar Milan: He is dispensing negative energy. Let me grab your dog's neck like this. Dog: Aw damn, this guy has me on some voodoo shit! I guess I have to stop being an asshole I guess.
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blcktime-epress · 7 years
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blcktime-epress · 7 years
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I don't know what adding me on 'Steam' will do, so add me on Steam.
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blcktime-epress · 8 years
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Where are her pants?
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blcktime-epress · 6 years
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To conclude his birth month, Jebus talks the movies he Love/Hates & straight up hates! Only on 'BlackTime E-Press'.
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blcktime-epress · 6 years
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Guess who's back? http://blacktimepress.weebly.com/…/adventures-in-pancakes-35
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blcktime-epress · 6 years
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Same sex marriage was on the ballot in California back in 2008 & conservatives were shitting bricks! That's the subject of this installment of 'Blogbabble Mini'. Only on 'BlackTime E-Press'.
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blcktime-epress · 6 years
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The conclusion!! -Predators either hunt for a well needed sequel or desperate nostalgia marketing -Internet shutting down -Puppet murder mystery -Paul Fieg is failing upwards -Little women done by Pure Flix and finally a Lisbeth Slanader sequel!! All this and more, only on 'BlackTime E-Press'
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blcktime-epress · 7 years
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After a over long hiatus, Blogbabble is back! On our return installment Jebus discusses all the craziness that occured these past five or six months, talks of upcoming plans, well deserved rants & geeks out on 'Twin Peaks'. Did you expect any different? Only on 'BlackTime E-Press'
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blcktime-epress · 7 years
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blcktime-epress · 7 years
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If you missed the new episode of 'Adventures In Pancakes'. here's the summary of the episode in one panel, told by a crudely drawn self portrait. http://blacktimepress.weebly.com/comics-for-weirdos/adventures-in-pancakes-34
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blcktime-epress · 7 years
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Quit jinxing shit that might happen!
This superstitious fucker
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blcktime-epress · 7 years
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A comic short about riding a Tonka truck toy as a skateboard.
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