#black widow fanfic

[stevenssacrab]

Collision

⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ✧ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ*

Summary: On a routine bike ride through your local park, you meet a beautiful stranger in unique way.

Rating: PG-13

Warnings: Mentions of blood, and wound care, descriptions of a bike accident

Word Count: 1.0k

a/n: Just a lil short and sweet one, with the ever beautiful Natasha :D

⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ✧ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ*

The cool autumn air gently nips at your skin, your cheeks round and rosy pink; you always loved a good evening bike ride around your local park; you first started it as a way to get the daily exercise, but you've grown to love the repetitive motion of pushing the petals, and the wind blowing past your face. Today was particularly beautiful; the sun was setting, a ray of crimson and amber painting the sky.

You like to use this time to unwind and think of nothing substantial, no deadlines, upcoming events, or obligations; be in the moment. As you round your 2nd lap around the park, you’re stuck on whether you should do another lap, while deep in thought, you don’t even see the person riding straight for you at an ungodly speed.

“Hey! Watch out!” A bystander yells, but it is already too late; time slows each second longer than the last as you come speeding toward this woman on her bike; there is no avoiding it; it is already happening. You collided with a painful crack, sending you flying over, landing hard on your shoulder, and tumbling forward.

When you open your eyes, you're greeted by a gorgeous woman, her face etched with worry. Her mouth is moving, but you can't hear anything she's saying. You're lost in her eyes, a beautiful mix of blueish green with flicks of amber; she slowly waves her hand in front of your face, snapping back into reality.

"Hello? Are you okay? I'm so sorry I didn't see you until it was too late." she said, her eyes scanning you for injuries, her face dropping when she saw blood coming from your forehead. "Oh my god, I have a first aid kit in my car; I'll be right back," she said quickly; you watched her run away and disappear momentarily behind the trees; you were inspecting the damage when you heard footsteps running toward you. Your eyes scan over her physique; you definitely overlooked that before.

"Okay, let me take a look," she said smoothly, setting the kit down next to you; she cracked open a water bottle and grabbed your hand; she softly put the water bottle into your hand.

"Here, take this," she says while grabbing a packet of ibuprofen; handing you the tablet, she patiently waits for you to do as instructed; you stare at her, mouth agape, "please," she says, gently motioning at the medication, you obey and swallow the pill, you're staring at her, thoroughly aware that you still haven't spoken a word.

"Th-thank you," you say meekly; you look at the palms of your hands.

"You're welcome," she chirps happily, "Let me take a look," she says, cracking open another water bottle; she pours it onto a towel and gently pats your forehead clean.

"So, what's your name?" she asks, focused on your wound.

"Y/N," you say gingerly, using the opportunity to take in every detail of her face, noticing the 2 moles on her cheek.

"You know it's rude to stare?" she quips, never breaking her focus.

"I-I'm not staring; you're just, in front of me is all." you defended

"Uh-huh, sure," she says cockily, flicking her eyes down to meet yours, you try to hold contact, but when she looks at you, you feel as if she's staring right into your soul.

"So, what do you do?" she asks, trying to fill the silence.

"I'm a firefighter," you say proudly.

"Oh, well, that's unexpected," she says, searching for the Neosporin, "how is a firefighter so clumsy?" she teases, her lips coming to a smirk.

"Clumsy? I'm pretty sure you ran into me," you laugh back.

"Why don't you let me make it up to you over coffee?" she says slyly, her eyes snapping to your lips and then back to your eyes.

"Hmm, I suppose," you tease back as you grab the Neosporin from the kit, handing it to her; she generously applies it, eyes watching your face for any hints of pain.

"Do you live around the area?" she asks, firming her hand on your shoulder.

"Yeah, like a 5-minute bike ride from here," you say; you're usually not this open with your personal information, but something about her, you know she's one of the good ones; she grabs a large bandaid and cautiously covers the wound.

"There you go, all better." She leaned back and started putting all the supplies away.

"Oh, let me help you," you say, suddenly moving to help, you knock over the entire box.

"I'm sorry, let me help you," you say; you kneel down and frantically clean up the mess.

"Y/N, relax," she says calmly; she kneels down and helps you clean up.

"Not clumsy, huh?" she says coyly, lifting her brow slightly.

"I'm not. I'm just nervous," you laugh, nervously staring at the ground.

"Do I make you nervous, Y/N?" she questions, slowly closing the space between you, inching closer like an apex predator. You don't know what else to do; you are reduced to a stuttering mess, slowly getting pushed into a nearby tree.

"I-No, I just-" you stutter out; you bump into the tree, suddenly aware of how close she is; you stare at her, eyes as wide as saucers.

"Shhh, it's alright, Y/N," she shushes, gently grabbing your hand; you jump at the sudden contact but instantly melt into her touch.

"Let's get you home, yeah?" she asks sweetly.

"Okay," you say simply, leading her out of the park.

"I'm Natasha, by the way," she says, bringing attention to the fact that you hadn't even asked what her name was; you smack your palm to your forehead, shame engulfing you; how did you forget to ask for her name?

"I'm so sorry, I didn't even ask your name, ugh," you sighed heavily, hitting your face with your hands.

"It's okay," she laughs, breaking any tension you had left in you. "I mean, I did crash into you, and you did land pretty hard," she says gently, thumbing over your knuckles.

"Thank you for taking care of me," you say shyly, avoiding eye contact, "Well, this is me," you say; you let go of her hand and reach for your keys; you do it slowly; you don't want this to end.

"I'll see you this weekend, right, for that coffee?" she asks, patiently awaiting your answer.

"Yes, definitely."

[avengerscompound]

Magic Fingers

Character Pairing:  Clint Barton x Natasha Romanoff Word Count: 520 Rating/Warnings: M (Brief mentions of sex)

His fingers moved - gentle and dexterous - scratching over her scalp and untangling the knots. They were calloused from hard manual use and moved with a practiced ease, completely different from the rough tug of the brush she was used to.

It made her scalp prickle in a warm pleasant way and she felt her muscles relax in a way that was so rare and novel to her.  She considered herself a hardass, but right now, she was soft like putty, leaning into the hand like a cat.

No one ever believed Natasha when she said she didn’t dye her hair.  She didn’t blame them for it.  It was an unusual shade - more of a blood red than ginger or honey blonde.  It was an asset to her.  Men loved the red hair.  They wanted to touch it, to have it curled around their fingers or bunched in their fists.  They wanted to know if the carpet matched the drapes.  They wanted to pull it from behind and hold her in place.

They were disgusting and she hated it, but it had made her job much easier to do.

These days, she didn’t much like people touching it at all.  She’d still allow it on occasion.  It wasn’t as if she avoided going to the salon.  But after years of strangers who seemed to think the way to gain ownership of her was to claim her hair first, she preferred if people didn’t touch it at all.  Not lovers.  Not stylists.  Not friends wanting a girl's night where they drank red wine and braided each other’s hair while they talked about boys (not that Natasha had friends like that).

Clint though - Clint was different.

He touched her like she was precious and fragile.  It was not a feeling that she was used to but it was one she could get used to.  He threaded his fingers through her hair, running them over her scalp.  The man hated magic and yet he had the magic touch.  She wanted so much when he played with her hair like this and yet she was completely content at the same time.

Clint Barton - archer, Avenger, ass.  He might just be the love of her life.

She rolled closer to him, her eyes fluttering closed and she made a sound that was way too close to a purr.  Clint laughed and his nails scratched softly down the back of her neck.  “What was that, Nat?” he asked.  “Did you turn into a cat?”

She opened her eyes and looked up at him through narrowed eyes.  “Shut up and kiss me already.”

He laughed more, but he didn’t push it.  He knew enough to know how much of a joke she could take.  Just like her hair, he was careful with her emotions.  He leaned down and pressed his lips to hers.

As they kissed, she reached up and pushed her hand into his hair, gently scratching her nails over his scalp.  He purred and leaned into her more.  It was nice to know that they shared a weakness.  One more sign he was her perfect match.

[writing-house-of-m]

Cold hands, Warm hearts

Natasha Romanoff x GN!Reader

Summary: Natasha warms you up on a cold day with an impromptu date

A/N: This is for @esouliie ! You can all thank her for this because I don't know when I would have gotten something new finished. This was also the result of there being way too many 'missing Natasha hours' recently (I've also been having a lot of 'missing Wanda hours' too and have re-watched WandaVision because of it). But, everyone... this fic... is so freaking cute and I hope you all think so too. Happy reading and let me know who you think!

"Hey," you hear a familiar rasp from over your shoulder. 

You didn't think you would hear from her so soon. She told you she was going to be busy, which is code for ‘away on a mission’, so have kept yourself occupied for the last few weeks trying not to think of the red head. Which is easier said than done. 

Every morning when you wake up disappointment fills you not seeing her there. Your intertwined lives are now routine. 

It is hard to adjust when she is away, especially when it is for weeks and what feels like no end in sight. On top of that, with missions like these, there is no communication between you to fill the Natasha shaped hole in your life. 

Sometimes you wonder if it would be easier to be involved with someone else, anyone else for that matter, but the thought is gone as quick as it comes because no one could ever replace the way she makes you feel. 

The first week of her absence you filled your free time as much as you could by catching up with friends and family. You constantly found yourself avoiding the question about why you have been so distant recently. It was the one thing Natasha requested from you - not telling anyone about your relationship with her - to, in her words ‘keep you safe'. 

You still remember the way she looked at you. It was the first time you could see past the facade she held, seeing the worry linger in her eyes for a split second. The intensity of her gaze and her hesitance was a strange thing to witness. When you nodded your head in agreement her smile was soft, almost relieved. In that moment you realized you would agree to anything she asked just to see that vulnerable side again. You felt privileged. 

This second and third week have been much slower, a lot of your time has been spent in the four walls of your apartment because of last minute canceled plans and much needed maintenance needed around your home. 

So you decide today, cold be damned, you will be taking a walk through your local park. You shared this little wonder of a place with Natasha in your fourth month of being together, happy to be able to reveal a bit more of you and your life. 

It is a public place, more people pass by here than in the street where you live. But you got to show Natasha all the overlooked secrets; little winding paths that lead to flower gardens, a pond hidden behind some bushes and the gargoyles you can see from one spot when standing in a specific angle by a monument in the center. You even pointed out some regulars you see because of all your time here. From the confined elderly wanting a bit of liberation from their mundane lives to daring children trying to climb the tallest tree they can find. 

A breeze rushes past, the cold chilling you to your bones and you inwardly curse at yourself. Trust you to have picked the coldest day for some freedom. Initially, the brisk air was making you regret your decision, that was until the sun came out. It didn't do a whole lot against the freezing temperature, but it did look pretty against the frost and ice distracting you from the chilly weather. 

The way the sun's rays shine between the branches that stretched out over your head reminded you of spring time and how much you couldn’t wait for the season to change. 

Just as you were about to get out from the clearing for some much needed sunlight and heat on your face, that’s when you heard Natasha. 

It has been so long you think you are hearing things, that is until you turn your head and see her. The long army green coat she is wearing almost makes her look taller. 

Almost. 

Strands of red hair peek out from the beanie Natasha is wearing, a braid is tucked into her pulled up collar and she has a soft smile on her face. One you have noticed she reserves for you. 

It takes everything in you to not run over and jump into her arms, to press your nose into her neck to get a smell of the home you have been craving. 

Big scenes are not her thing, you’ve learnt. 

Instead your eyes drop to her gloved hands holding two hot drinks which takes you out of your stupor and smiling brighter in return. You almost want to ask how she knew where you were but then remember her profession. 

"You look cold," there is a playfulness to Natasha’s voice matching her smirk. 

Regardless of how wrapped up you are, you know your scarf hasn't done much to stop your face from getting cold, it must be covered in a light blush. 

"I could say the same about you," you raise an eyebrow with your own smirk. A noticeable pink tint is adorning her cheeks and nose from the cold bite of the air. You wonder how long she has been trailing you. 

Natasha's smile widens as closes in and hands you one of the cups. You take off your gloves, shoving them into your pocket to allow the heat to bring back the feeling in your frozen hands as you bring it to your nose to take a whiff. Your favorite, of course it is. 

She leans in and pecks you on the lips, her still warm palm from the drink sinks into your cheek making you forget about the kiss of the sun you were walking towards. Natasha disappoints you with how short her lips are on yours, you were hoping for something that was more than just a split second considering how long it has been. 

Although Natasha pulls back it is only by an inch as she remains close to ask, "Where are you going?" 

Her voice is low and her warm breath is a nice contrast to the icy wind. 

Your eyes flutter close as you revel in her presence and soak up the warmth she brings. Brushing your nose against hers you reply, "Wherever my feet take me," you smile and open your eyes to the green ones you selfishly wish to keep to yourself. "I'm glad I have some company now," you whisper. 

"I hope you weren't expecting anyone else," Natasha says with a twitch of an eyebrow. 

You shake your head. "Definitely not," you say, pressing a small kiss to her lips, one that lasts longer than the mediocre one she gave you. "I missed you." 

You like seeing her like this. Carefree. Soft. Unguarded. 

Well as unguarded as can be, it was something you picked up in your first few months of spending time together - Natasha is always alert. The way her eyes flint around every so often, looking around to quickly survey her surroundings, always cautious of any lingering threats. To the untrained eye it looks like she is taking in the scenery, but you know after knowing her for as long as you have. 

Over time it is a habit you have even picked up from her, making you wonder if there are things she has picked up from you. 

Natasha stands by your side allowing you to loop an arm around her waist while you take a sip of your beverage. It leaves a warm trail as it makes its way down your throat. It still isn't as warm as the way Natasha makes you feel though as cheesy as that may sound. 

"Thank you for this, I didn't realize how much I needed it," you say, signaling the paper cup. 

She smiles at you to acknowledge your gratitude. "You're never one to think ahead, plus I saw you shiver," Natasha remarks. 

You scoff, shaking your head, "I did not shiver." 

Some children are laughing not too far in front of you which distracts both of your attentions away from your conversation. A large puddle of water has frozen over and seems to be the main source of entertainment for the little gang. 

The two of you stop to watch their innocence, a pang of jealousy hits you because of how carefree and innocent they are. Not a single worry showing on their faces in this cruel world. 

You have been fortunate to only hear about the atrocities always going on. More so since you started to date Natasha. She doesn't go into detail about her line of work but the faraway look she has on her face sometimes after certain assignments tells you all you need to know. It fills you with pride knowing you are Natasha’s source of domestic normalcy. 

One of the snuggly wrapped up boys slips and tries to regain his footing before he falls to the ground making you let out a breath of laughter. The scene is something straight from a cartoon as the boy tries to find balance when trying to stand again while the rest laugh at him. A boy in a puffy gray coat, who is howling with laughter, loses his feet from under him sending him straight to the ground landing on his butt making the rest of them exclaim even louder. 

The smile you see in your peripheral vision tells you Natasha is enjoying this too. 

"How long had you been watching me before you decided to come over, stalker?" You ask, curiosity getting the better of you. 

"Long enough to see you shiver," Natasha accuses in her husky voice. 

You bark out a laugh, "I do not shiver!" 

"Yeah, yeah, you keep lying to yourself," Natasha smirks. 

You spend long minutes, people watching while sipping on your drinks and basking in this precious stolen time you get to spend with each other. 

The children are fewer now, some of them have left with their parents while the rest stay. They have started a game to see who can stay on their feet the longest as they try to knock each other down. 

Sometimes you forget Natasha’s past, what little you know of it, and almost ask about her childhood. You bite your tongue to stop yourself from asking 'What did you get up to as a kid?’ 

Instead, you face Natasha as she continues to stare on at the scene; her side profile is enough to show her fatigue. You place your empty cup on the wall beside you so you can take her face in your hands. 

Natasha takes your lead to turn in your direction allowing you to take in all of her features. 

"You look tired," you whisper in concern as your thumb rubs along her cheekbone. 

"Gee, thanks(!)" Natasha chuckles at her own sarcasm. 

"Nat," you start, ready to reprimand her for not being serious. 

"We’ve had some long days. But don’t worry, I'll be off for the holidays,” Natasha replies. “You'll have me for two weeks. That’s enough time for you to get sick of having me around. By the end of it you’re going to want to be rid of me." 

"Impossible," you say without thinking then lean in to press a kiss to the corner of her lips. 

Natasha turns her head slightly to meet your lips, sighing when she allows herself a moment of being wrapped up in you. 

A buzzing sound makes you stop before you can deepen the kiss any further. You let out a breath of disdain from Natasha’s phone ruining your moment. Natasha smiles at you apologetically, taking the device from her pocket. 

While Natasha checks the notification you give her some privacy, picking up both empty cups to discard them. 

When you return and meet Natasha's eyes, the sparkle that was there just moments ago has faded as regret takes over. She is being called back. 

"Three more days, then you're all mine, Romanoff,” you smile. “And for a whole two weeks!" you exaggerate in hopes to lessen the blow of her having to leave. "How did I get so lucky? I guess I'm being spoiled this season." 

You know you succeed when you see the corners of Natasha's lips raise slightly before she holds onto your coat and pulls you in kissing you again. 

Her phone buzzes impatiently, interrupting you again . 

"I have to go," Natasha says, her warm breath fanning over your face as she rests her forehead against yours. ”But just know, I’m the lucky one here.” 

You smile at her confession and revel once more in the warmth she provides before you have to face the harsh cold that comes with the Winter months alone. 

Kissing Natasha’s forehead you meet her loving green gaze once more. "Come back to me," you breathe out as light as the breeze chilling you. 

"Always," Natasha says, sweetly and just as quiet. Her voice carries the weight of more than the one worded sentence she has spoken. 

Taking a breath, Natasha gives you a final peck before she drags herself away from you. 

Your arm stretches out as Natasha walks away, your hand lingering in hers for those extra few seconds of comfort. But mostly because you don't want to let her go. 

Saying goodbye is always difficult no matter how short the visit. 

As you watch her walk away you think about the first time you met the assassin. 

Out of all the windows in the city Natasha crashed through yours. Your shock had you frozen in place until she tried to stumble out of your apartment but collapsed from fatigue because of the fight she had just endured. 

After getting over the fact an Avenger covered in dirt and blood had ruined your new rug, you used your limited first aid knowledge to nurse her back to health. When she awoke a few hours later, she told you just how crappy of a job you had done. 

What got Natasha’s attention was when you quipped back saying you should have let her bleed out to make a quick buck off of all of her equipment to pay for the damages she caused. 

When she left a short while later you didn’t think you would ever see her in person again. You were looking forward to being able to tell all the people in your life about the encounter with an actual superhero. 

Reality hit you in the gut with the name of ‘Non Disclosure Agreement’ and a clean up crew which you couldn’t be mad about. 

Unbeknownst to you, after your first meeting Natasha couldn't stop herself from wanting to see you again. Her mind drifted to the ‘kind’ (your words not hers) stranger who applied sloppy bandages to her arm and stomach. The messy job would have gotten infected if she hadn’t woken up. Natasha caught herself smiling at the memory too often and had to force herself to be present for work. 

Life went on and your encounter felt less and less real as each day passed. Until one evening, while in your office building working late, you received a call telling you you were needed on the roof. Skeptical as you were, you obeyed thinking of the promotion you had been working so hard toward. 

What you hadn’t expected was a fully healed Black Widow to emerge from the shadows, playfully schooling you to not comply with shady orders received late at night. Then insulting you with how boring your life was and how you should learn to cook for yourself instead of wasting all your money on take-out. 

Surprise was an understatement and instead of letting that show, like your mouth wasn’t already slightly hanging open from the shock while she spoke, you decided to play Natasha’s game and call her out for the stalker that she was. 

Since then your meetings have been sporadic but it didn’t stop you both from falling for each other. Who knew a year and a half on you would be in a relationship with each other, life would have made more sense if you had stopped talking. But you have defied the odds and are still going strong. 

When you make it back to your apartment you find flowers waiting for you on the kitchen counter making you smile. A card attached to them with a message in Natasha’s handwriting that reads ‘3 more days ♡’ makes you feel like your heart is going to burst from emotion. 

Needless to say that smile never left your face throughout you making dinner all the way up until the moment you go to bed that night. Natasha somehow always has a habit of making you feel like a giddy teenager. 

You couldn’t wait to see her again. The gift you have been wanting to give to her for a few weeks has been hidden under your towels in the kitchen cabinet. You can only hope she doesn't already know about it. 

The next time you are together you are going to give her a key to your apartment so that she knows she will always have a place to come back to. 

A place she can call home. 

[axinite25]

Kate Bishop dies on a Thursday

SUMMARY: Kate Bishop is living the same day, over and over, and every day she dies. Luckily, she doesn't remember any of it.

But Yelena does.

Words: 23,364

Chapter: 1/1

[cuinaminute229]

Lemonade and sweet tea

pairing: Natasha Romanoff x reader

warnings: fluff, mostly smut, 18+ only

a/n: this was originally only fluff, no idea what happened but now it's fluff with ✨spice✨ also @family-house-of-m cause you asked so nicely enjoy some spicy fluff that probably sucks lol

....

The smell of grilled cheese and hotdogs fills the kitchen. It’s the weekend, a mid-afternoon that warms the grass and concrete sidewalks along the road.

The windows and the backdoor are open to let the breeze run through the house, a few glasses of lemonade and sweet tea sit atop the table with pink straws and polka dots painted plastic cups.

You glance up from where you lean against the counter, a knife in one hand and half of a sandwich in the other, a smile lifts your lips when you catch sight of her in the doorway.

“Did you lose a bet?” You tease her softly as you place the food and utensil down before walking over to her. Her glare is playful as she watches your every movement, hands on her hips as you step up right in front of her. She's dripping wet, droplets of water still clinging to her skin along with the smell of chlorine from the pool.

“I did not lose a bet, I was pushed.” She explains and you bite your cheek to suppress a grin.

“The great Natasha Romanoff let her guard down enough to be pushed into the pool? By a child no less."

Natasha narrows her eyes at you and you realize it's too late to step back because her eyes are bright and gleaming as she pushes forward and wraps her arms around your waist, trapping you in her grip with a low chuckle as you yelp and try to push her away. “Nat, no!”

She’s fast and smooth with her motions as her hands sneak under your shirt as she pulls you even closer, a smug expression on her face as she places a kiss on your cheek.

“Guess who’s soaked now?” Her whisper is low and suggestive and her fingers flex against the muscles of your back when you shiver at her tone.

“You are evil.” You tell her, voice concrete in your conclusion. She smirks as you give in and returns her embrace. Dancing your fingers up the length of her back, finding purchase at the black tied strings of her bikini top.

She raises an eyebrow at you and pushes you back with slow calculated steps until you meet the edge of the counter.

“Clint and his kids are here Nat.” You remind her as her hands wander, nails scratching lightly as she gives you a smirk.

“We'll be quick babygirl.” Her voice is a seductive purr, a dark gleam in her eyes before she captures your lips in a deep kiss.

A hum leaves you as she maneuvers her grip so she can lift you to sit on the only free space on the counter, her teeth nipping at your bottom lip as your breath hitches. Her hands slide over your thighs, pushing the fabric of your skirt up to reveal more smooth skin, urging your legs apart so she can step into the available space.

She pulls back to kiss the soft slope of your throat, nibbling a spot that she knows will make your knees weak. Her hands once again travel under your tank top to dance along the curve of your waist and stomach. You bite your lip as your gaze trails over her shoulder to eye the open door. The warm air brushing through the kitchen in a gentle breeze, a reminder of the heat of summer and sun.

“We can’t,” You try to push her away, hands on her shoulders as the chance that you could be caught creeps into your mind. “Nat.”

She bites the slope of your neck making you shiver. Her tongue soothes the mark she's left, breath hot and heavy as she trails kisses to your shoulder, teasing the edge of your collarbones. “Relax, we can. The kids are having a water balloon fight. We’re fine.”

She pushes the damp fabric of your shirt up with a deadly smirk and you let her toss the shirt away.

“You are evil.” You remind her, voice not as sarcastic as you want, sounding too breathless. You run your hands up her arms to loop them around her shoulders, fingers tangling in her auburn hair. Strands sticking to her jaw and neck as you brush her hair from her face.

“And yet you love me.” Her expression is smug, eyes bright as she keeps eye contact, letting her hands roam, touch soft and teasing.

You hook your legs around her waist, the denim shorts she’s wearing damp and rough against your thighs. “I do love you, always. I married you after all.”

She kisses you again, slow and savoring like she’s planning on taking her time, drawing it out until you can’t even think past the brush of her fingers and lips. Her hands grip your hips, a touch possessive as she pulls you impossibly closer, you groan at the motion and you feel her smile against your lips.

Natasha ducks her head and presses an open-mouthed kiss against the bruise she's left to admire, smirking as your fingers dig into the muscles of her shoulders, nails dragging softly. As her hands trail up the soft skin of your stomach, your fingers tug at the tied knot of her top.

“You have to be quiet.” She reminds you with an impossibly gentle kiss, and you swear she's teasing you on purpose.

"I'm always quiet." You tell her, your stare is intense as you slowly undo the strings, the tiniest smirk on your face when you see her swallow as her top comes loose. You spread your fingers over her newly exposed chest, an innocent smile on your face.

"That," She smirks as she leans forward. You scrape your nails along the muscles of her abdomen as she pushes her chest against your own, drawing a sigh from your throat. "Is a lie."

The contact is dizzying, the heat of her skin, the way she breathes heavily against your lips. You roll your hips for more contact, shameless in your need.

You kiss her like you're starving, like you will never get enough. You kiss her as a moan crawls up your throat, and you can only concentrate on all the places she's touching you.

You ache for her in every single way possible.

The graze of her nipples and the exploration of her hands, fingers digging into the soft flesh of your ribcage. The rough fabric of her shorts when she grinds her hips into you.

The heat of her is intoxicating, the gentleness, everything.

"You are," your breath hitches when she drags a nail over the curve of your breast. "such a tease. And a liar."

Natasha pulls back just slightly, nipping your bottom lip as her hands find purchase on your thighs. "Whatever do you mean?" She mumbles with a smirk.

"I thought we were going to be quick?" You raise an eyebrow as her, one hand tangling in her hair as she holds your gaze, eyes burning with a hunger that ignites you.

She leans forward and kisses your lips before she ducks her head and nips at the swell of your breast. Your fingers tighten in her hair as a shiver runs up your spine and she hums against you.

Natasha slides her hands underneath the bunched up fabric of your skirt, nails scratching lightly as her fingers slide up the expansion of your inner thighs.

She is so close to exactly where you need her most and yet she pauses and pulls back to look at you. Her expression is horribly smug when a whine escapes you. "What if I want to take my time? What if I want to devour you?" Natasha's voice is a purr, deep and promising.

“Fuck,” The word is a whimper, breathless even and you would swear your blood is on fire with how she's looking at you.

Natasha hums in agreement. One hand slips around your waist while the other grips your thigh like she never wants to let go.

When she brushes forward, nose bumping against yours, she smiles. Mumbles your name before capturing your lips in a desperate kiss that steals the ability to breathe.

You cup her face in your hands as you give in. A needy whine escapes when she teases you, fingers grazing over blazing heat.

As she pushes forward, her other hand brushes your hair out of your face, and she growls into the kiss. "I can feel how much you want me,"

Your breathing is ragged and a gasp escapes when she enters you with two fingers.

Natasha teases the twitching muscles of your back, tracing the length of your spine. Her touch is light enough to tickle if you weren't concentrating on the fact she's yet to move her finger.

You tighten your legs around her, try to pull her even closer than she already is so you can chase what's just out of reach but she doesn't budge, only smirks at your impatience.

A frustrated huff leaves you as you pull her into another kiss. You whimper when she pulls back enough to exhale against your lips.

"Someone's impatient." She teases you, fingers curling just to see your response. A curse rushes out of your mouth and your thighs twitch.

"Having fun aren't you?" You raise an eyebrow and force a sigh, trying to steady your breathing so she doesn't know exactly how much she's affecting you. It doesn't work.

"Drawing it out makes it so much more," she kissed you again, "enjoyable." The word is a satisfied purr and your knees tremble.

She moves her thumb to press exactly where you ache for her, adding just enough pressure for you to grind against her hand. A curse dies on your tongue with a strangled moan.

Your nails dig into her shoulders as she moves to kiss the spot behind your ear. Natasha chuckles quietly into the sensitive skin, causing you to tremble in her hold.

As soon as she starts to move, as soon as she starts to fuck you in earnest, curling her fingers and whispering praises against your neck, you swear you're going to pass out.

You lean forward and brush your nose against Nat's shoulder, breath hitching when her fingers find a sensitive spot.

As you dig your teeth into her shoulder, the smooth skin muffles your whine as she rolls her hips forward.

You swear your entire body trembles.

"What the hell is taking so - OH MY GOD."

You press your face into Natasha's neck with a groan, embarrassment rising goosebumps on your shoulders as you hug her against you.

A door slams shut and you feel her chuckle at being caught and she bites at your earlobe.

“Focus on me, just me," Natasha murmurs. She brushes her nose against yours as she changes the angle of her hand, adding another finger when you roll your hips and beg for more.

“Please, please, please Nat.” You whimper and you swear you can hear her smirk.

Natasha dips her head to press a kiss to your neck, teeth scraping gently at the bruise she's so proud of. "Are you going to come for me, sweetheart? Come on, I've got you." She coaxes softly.

Natasha tightens her arm around your waist and pulls you into a kiss that makes your head spin and your breath hitch as she brings you over the edge.

The orgasm slams into you hard enough that you see stars. Your choked cry becomes a whimper when she doesn't slow her pace, drawing it out until you can't breathe anymore.

Natasha hums, and kisses your jaw as you bow your head, breathing heavily.

You whine, exhaling softly and you have to actually think as you ease your grip on her waist so Natasha can step back. “Fuck.”

Her fingers glisten in the afternoon light and your lungs refuse to work as she sucks a finger into her mouth. You whimper as you watch her, eyes fixated on her lips.

She smirks when she releases her finger with a pop. Hold your gaze as she continues with her other fingers.

“You’re going to kill me.” You whisper, and a shiver dances along your skin.

She looks impossibly smug.

Your fingers grasp her hip as you watch helplessly.

“Don’t forget to breathe baby,” Natasha reminds you softly.

You suck in a breath as she leans forward, a soft smile on her face and she cups your face, pulling you into a kiss. You moan when you taste yourself on her tongue.

“You… you need to,” You sigh against her lips. “Apologies to Clint.”

“It’s his fault.” She murmurs before kissing you again.

“It’s your fault.” You correct her, looping your arms around her neck to keep her close.

“Cause I’m evil?” She asks with a small smile and you hum in agreement.

"Obviously."

....

[quietlyimplode]

ignite your bones

After the fall of General Dreykov, and the remnants of the Red Room still at large, Natasha first year at SHIELD is anything but healing. Labeled a traitor and a turncoat, Natasha tries to find her footing in a strange new world.

Whumptober 2024: Day 29 - fatigue

Warnings: none I can think of

Word Count: 1.3k (gif not mine)

Summary: everyone is tired

Masterlist

Whumptober Masterlist.

.

Maria yawns.

Knocking on Clint’s door, it feels like déjà vu.

To her surprise he’s awake and comes to the door quickly.

“You look like shit,” she tells him bluntly.

“Yeah,” he replies.

She follows him in, worried.

“What happened?” she asks, as he offers her coffee.

She nods, and he makes another pot, standing looking at her with sunken eyes. His movements are clumsy, unlike him.

“You’re not sleeping,” she assumes.

“Nightmares,” he confirms.

Maria nods, her worry deepening.

“Are they getting bad again?”

Clint doesn’t answer, occupying himself with making her a drink.

“Yeah.”

He hands it over and she sips it, not commenting on the strong taste and bitterness of it.

“Stay here,” she offers, “sleep or rest if you can.”

He shakes his head.

“I can’t… I got…”

“Natasha, I know, I can go?”

She can tell how truly shit he feels, because he considers it before refusing again.

Maria sighs.

“How about half a day? I’ll go on to make sure she’s okay, and then you can come in and finish the day?”

Clint looks around, eying the couch.

“I’ll knock you out myself,” she offers.

Clint gives her a half smile.

“Thanks.. I just… there’s these dreams and sometimes they just stick.”

She frowns.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

A look of fear passes across Clint’s face, an honest moment, before the relaxed expression returns.

“No, not really,” he answers.

Maria sips her coffee, wincing this time.

“Anything I should know, before I see her?”

Clint looks uncertain.

“She has a letter for Olivia. She wants to get it to her. She said anyone could read it, but I think it’s private. She also went into archives yesterday. I don’t know what information she found, but I don’t think it was what she wanted.”

Maria nods.

“I.. Uhh.. I don’t think she’s sleeping either.”

Maria finishes her coffee and stands.

“Thanks for coming over.”

Maria grabs her keys.

“You’re on the way.”

They both knew it was a lie.

“Just… try and get some sleep okay?”

Clint nods, running his hand over his face and sighing heavily.

“And eat and drink something.”

She stops at the door, “something that’s not coffee.”

He stands with her and pushes air out of his lips in a huff.

“Yeah, yeah.”

He watches her leave, closing the door gently behind her.

.

Maria thinks now her offering of donuts and coffee for Natasha seems stupid, as she knocks at the door.

She berates herself, moving from foot to foot.

The door opens and she notes the look of surprise on Natasha’s face.

“Your face is looking better,” she tells her, noticing the raw healing skin on her forehead.

“I did a good job.”

The small half smile that Natasha gives is short lived, but returns when she holds up the coffee and donuts.

“Where’s Clint?”

Natasha always seems so even, her voice never raising, but Maria thinks she can tell when she’s worried; her voice goes quieter.

Maria wonders if she knows the tell.

The question is quiet, reserved in its essence, but to Maria it betrays the worry.

“He’s fine. He’s coming in later.”

Natasha opens the door wider, allowing Maria inside.

The space is perfect and neat, like no one lives there. Natasha could leave and they wouldn’t know this had been her room.

She wonders where all the little things are that Clint had given to her.

The small knick knacks are likely hiding somewhere, just not in plain sight.

“Do you want to spar later?” Maria asks on a whim.

Natasha’s face lights up.

“Yes,” she replies, and then, maybe because she replied quickly, “I’d like that.”

Natasha chews on the offered donut, and sips at the piping hot black coffee, and not for the first time, as they sit in silence, Maria wonders if they could be friends.

.

The first hit is tentative.

Maria stops and looks at her.

“What the fuck was that? If you’re going to hit me, just do it.”

Natasha nods.

“Are you sure?”

Maria rolls her eyes.

“Do you need a safe word?”

Natasha's question makes her bark out a laugh.

“You’ve been sparring with Clint?”

Natasha nods.

“His safe word is yellow.”

Maria laughs again.

“Sure, yellow. Three rounds, 3 minutes. That work for you?”

Natasha nods.

They start again.

This time, the punch comes straight, Maria moves to the left and dances back.

It’s clear that Natasha has been trained. In what martial arts? She’s not sure. It seems to be a combination of many, and the integration of all.

She throws a kick, and feels her legs being swept underneath her, falling she grabs onto Natasha, almost climbing her and pulling her down with her.

It almost works.

Natasha pushes back and allows Maria to stand.

They circle each other.

Throw in a series of jabs and punches, hooks and kicks to the body and head, the timer seems to be at a stand still even as the seconds count down.

Maria feels herself become tired.

She’s been slacking.

Her early morning run had only been 3 miles instead of her usual 8, and her weights program was sorely neglected.

Angry at her own poor time management, she makes it to the final round of 3 minutes and groans.

Natasha looks around, finding the drink fountain and moves to go fill two paper cups.

They sip the water in silence, both leaving a puddle of sweat underneath them.

“I’m done,” she announces, laying back, letting her chest heave. Natasha may have kicked her ass, but she feels it wasn’t woeful on her part either.

“That was enough.”

Natasha nods, eyes watching, her breath under control much sooner than Maria’s.

“Thanks,” she replies. “I’ve earned some sleep.”

Maria closes her eyes, choosing to ignore Natasha’s statement and the implication that rest is only earned, and not just a part of the human experience.

“Yeah,” she replies, “me too.”

.

Fury rubs his eyes, removing his patch and flipping it up onto his head.

“What do you think?”

Coulson leans back in the chair, glancing at the proposal, he doesn’t answer, still reading through the document.

“I think I’m tired,” he replies, passing the papers back over and shrugging.

“I think it’s a good idea. You can’t do anything else. You can’t kill her after all she’s done, you can’t send her away, and this might be the only way she’s accepted.”

Fury staples the paper, the large confidential in red over the top of it.

“Well, there’s a long way to go before that happens, but the small strike teams have worked for us before.”

Coulson nods.

Fury stands and heads to his filing cabinet, putting the papers inside.

“I’ll take it to the WSC tomorrow, they’ll agree.”

He holds up a bottle of brown liquid and offers it across to Coulson.

Nodding, Coulson produces two glasses from the cabinet behind him.

“I think she’ll do some good. I mean look at all she’s inadvertently accomplished being locked up? She’s been here just over six months and already we’re better off.”

Fury pours the alcohol.

“Do you think Barton knew what he was getting into?”

Coulson shakes his head.

“Did you?”

Fury replaces his eye patch, his look of intensity returning as he sinks further into his chair.

“No. I don’t suppose I did.”

“I think he’ll be okay. There are worse things than having a widow as a partner.”

“What about Maria?” Coulson asks.

“What about her?”

“She’s too good an agent to not be part of a team.”

Fury considers the words, considers Maria and how efficiently she’s managed everything, from reporting to debrief to mission planning.

The intelligence involved in the way she handled herself.

“You’re going to need someone by your side too,” Coulson reminds him.

Fury sips his drink, the long drag helping him think.

“Yes, I suppose I will.”

The two men sit in the office, the world dark as they continue to talk into the night, though fatigue drags at both of them.

.

[inlovewithfairies]

I'm trying to raise funds for an adventure*, anyone want to commision a fic?

I promise in the last 3 years my writing got way better.

* I do have a day job but bruh our economy is baaaaad these days

[loveroffictionalmen]

I've got a request. I understand if this is a difficult topic and you don't feel comfortable writing it. Natasha coming back from a mission to find reader self harming. Just loads of comfort and fluff, please

More Than You Know

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x gn!reader

Description: After feeling like there was no other way out, reader starts to self harm again. Natasha catches them and makes them feel a little better.

Warnings: LOTS of angst, self harm, negative thoughts, suicidal ideation, razors, blood, talk of depression, swearing. PLEASE DO NOT READ THIS IF IT WILL TRIGGER YOU!!

Words: 1.3k

A/N: Please please please, if you ever feel the need to self harm, talk to someone. Talk to someone safe. It doesn’t have to be a family member, just someone you know who won’t get mad. I am always available to talk to. I really hope this brings comfort to whoever is reading. Remember you are loved.

It had been an exceptionally hard week. Normally episodes for y/n didn’t last for more than a month, but this one had lasted nearly two. And it still wasn’t getting better. In fact, it felt like this time, maybe it wasn’t going to get better.

Y/n had had thoughts like those before, but never too bad. They were always fleeting. Always gone after a moment. But they were sticking around this time. Nearly all day.

The compound was eerily silent. Not just because it was nearly midnight, but because everyone was gone on a mission. Everyone but y/n. A hostile force threatened the city yet again, and y/n was stuck in the compound. They felt stupid. Useless even. They should be out protecting the world; instead they were in their room contemplating if they even wanted to get out of bed. They had barely eaten all day, didn’t brush their teeth, they were a mess, they thought.

The pain was too much. The hole in their heart was growing larger by the minute, and the feeling of utter hopelessness was eating away at them. All they wanted was for Natasha to be there. She would make things better. She always did.

“Oh god,” y/n whispered. “What do I do?” They were hoping for a miracle. That Nat would suddenly appear and tell them everything would be alright and they were going to be okay. She would whisper sweet nothings to them and hold them until they fell asleep. But, it was impossible. Natasha was nearly across the country.

“Please,” they begged no one in particular. “Please come back.” A tear fell down their cheek. The pain in their heart was spreading to their stomach and throat. It felt like it would never end.

Tears began to pour from y/n’s eyes. They pulled their legs in and buried their head in their knees. Sobbing, y/n contemplated the options. Go to sleep. Eat. Cry more. None of them seemed appealing to y/n. Except one.

They had done it before until Tony caught them. He had seen the scars and forced y/n to show him where the razor was. He threw it out, of course, and locked up all the sharp objects in the compound. Even the weapons. Especially the weapons. He did it out of love and fear. He cared for y/n like a father would care for a child.

But after a while, Tony unlocked everything and allowed y/n to train again. He thought they were better. And for a while, they were.

But now, it felt like there was no other option. Y/n, tears still in their eyes, unfolded themselves and swung their legs over the bed. They were going to find something. Something to end the pain, even if it was only temporary.

Opting for the bathroom, they made a beeline for the shower. There was a shaving razor, and it wouldn’t be too hard to take apart. They fumbled a bit with taking it apart, cutting their thumb in the process. Y/n hissed in pain. But it didn’t hurt that much. And when they saw the red, it was over. There was no talking y/n out of it now.

When the razor was dismantled, y/n sat cross-legged on the floor. They stared at the small blade in their hand. Taking a deep breath, y/n slashed the blade across their left wrist. It stung a bit, but the satisfaction of seeing the blood come to the surface was far too great. They did it again. And again. And eventually their arm became numb. In fact, y/n became numb. Tears stopped falling. They were at peace.

But it was an odd peace. There was still pain in their heart. It had just subdued. And nothing mattered anymore.

They were too lost in thought to notice anything other than the blood on their wrist. They didn’t notice the Avengers enter the compound, and didn’t notice the footsteps coming towards their room.

Natasha didn’t want to wake y/n, as she assumed they would be asleep by now. But when she entered the room and saw the bed empty, Natasha halted. She turned to see the bathroom door wide open, y/n on the ground, and a bloody blade by their side.

Taking a sharp inhale, she froze. She wasn’t quite sure what to do. She didn’t know how to respond, being on the other end.

In the Red Room, Natasha found ways to cope. She would dig her nails into her palm until she bled, she would pinch her thighs, pick at unhealed scabs. No one noticed.

And now, being on the other end, Natasha realized she could help y/n, the way she wanted to be helped. She took a deep breath and walked over to the doorframe. Y/n still didn’t register that Nat was there. But a soft knock on the doorframe quickly brought them back to reality.

“Shit! I- Nat- shit shit shit, I didn’t-” Y/n stammered, wincing a bit as they put their hand over their raw wrist.

“Let me see that,” Natasha said quietly. She wasn’t angry. In fact, her tone was warm and comforting. Y/n opened their mouth to protest, but thought better of it. They held their wrist out for Natasha to see. “Oh my love.” Is all Natasha said. Pain swam in her eyes, but she didn’t show any other signs that she was upset. Of course, Natasha’s heart was screaming. She wanted to pull y/n into her arms and magically heal the wounds of their wrist and soul. But she couldn’t.

Instead, Natasha got up and wet a small hand towel. She gently wiped away the dried blood and held the cold towel there for a bit to ease the burn. “I’m sorry,” she said.

Y/n snapped their head up. “What for?” they said.

“For not being there. I shouldn’t have gone on that mission,” Nat looked at y/n. Y/n could practically taste the guilt that was surrounding Natasha.

“It’s not your fault. It’s mine for being so fucked up-”

“You are not fucked up. Believe me.” Natasha’s tone hardened along with her gaze.

“But I am.”

“No. You are the most amazing person I have ever met. You make everyone’s life better. You are a joy and a light for everyone. You- you’ve helped me more than you know.” Natasha admitted. Y/n scrunched their eyebrows to keep themselves from crying more. Natasha took y/n’s cheek in her hand and whispered, “More than you know.” With her other hand, she brought y/n’s wrist to her mouth and placed a soft kiss on the cuts. “Let’s get this bandaged up. Don’t want it getting infected.” Natasha helped y/n off the ground and found the first aid kit.

Once everything was all bandaged up, Natasha led y/n to the bed and laid down with them. She held y/n as tight as she could, stroking her hair and whispering over and over, “it’s going to be okay.” Natasha would admit it was more like she was trying to convince herself of it more than y/n.

And y/n was finally at peace. A good peace this time. They were finally in Nat’s arms, hearing those sweet nothings that they had dreamed of.

“I won’t leave you like that again. Never again my love.”

[peavhyshy]

- 𝗣𝗔𝗥𝗧 I (𝗛𝗢𝗪 𝗧𝗢 𝗟𝗢𝗦𝗘 𝗔 𝗚𝗜𝗥𝗟 𝗜𝗡 𝗧𝗘𝗡 𝗗𝗔𝗬𝗦)

Pairing : Natasha Romanoff x Reader

Summary: in which you write an article on how to lose someone in ten days to prove to your best friend it's not about looks but about how you act in a relationship.

Warning: n/a

Words: 2,514

Series Masterlist

𝗣𝗔𝗥𝗧 I

❝You seriously think you can get a girl to fall in love with you in just ten days❞

𝗬𝗢𝗨 𝗦𝗜𝗚𝗛𝗘𝗗 𝗔𝗦 𝗦𝗛𝗘 𝗧𝗬𝗣𝗘𝗗 𝗢𝗨𝗧 𝗔𝗡𝗢𝗧𝗛𝗘𝗥 𝗠𝗨𝗡𝗗𝗔𝗡𝗘 𝗔𝗥𝗧𝗜𝗖𝗟𝗘 𝗢𝗡 𝗬𝗢𝗨𝗥 𝗖𝗢𝗠𝗣𝗨𝗧𝗘𝗥 𝗙𝗘𝗘𝗟𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗪𝗘𝗜𝗚𝗛𝗧 𝗢𝗙 𝗕𝗢𝗥𝗘𝗗𝗢𝗠 𝗣𝗥𝗘𝗦𝗦𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗗𝗢𝗪𝗡 𝗢𝗡 𝗬𝗢𝗨. You longed for a chance to write about more serious subjects, something that could truly make a difference. Just as you thought you were about to lose your mind in thinking of what your career could be, you noticed your best friend Wanda approaching her cubicle.

Wanda’s red eyes and tear stained cheeks made your heart ache. ‘’Y/N just can’t find the right guy.’ Wanda choked out, trying to hold back her tears. ‘’I mean, is there something wrong with me? Am I just not attractive enough?’

You reached out, placing a comforting hand on Wanda’s shoulder. ‘’Girl, you’re gorgeous, any guy with a brain would be lucky to have you. It’s about how you’re always depending on these guys for your happiness and acting a bit… you know needy,’’ You said softly, trying to offer some insight.

Wanda sniffled, dabbing at her green eyes with a tissue you have given her. ‘’Huh, I never thought about it like that.’’

Inspired by Wanda’s situation, You decided to write an article to help Wanda but also to challenge yourself as a writer. ‘’Hey, I’ve got an idea. What If I write an article on how to lose someone in ten days by, like, imitating your behaviors? That way, I can show you it’s not about looks but about how we act in relationships.’’

𝗡𝗔𝗧𝗔𝗦𝗛𝗔 𝗥𝗢𝗠𝗔𝗡𝗢𝗙𝗙 𝗟𝗘𝗔𝗡𝗘𝗗 𝗕𝗔𝗖𝗞 𝗜𝗡 𝗛𝗘𝗥 𝗖𝗛𝗔𝗜𝗥, 𝗔 𝗖𝗢𝗡𝗙𝗜𝗗𝗘𝗡𝗧 𝗦𝗠𝗜𝗟𝗘 𝗣𝗟𝗔𝗬𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗢𝗡 𝗛𝗘𝗥 𝗟𝗜𝗣𝗦. Her boss, David, a middle-aged man with graying hair, raised an eye at her proposal.

‘’You seriously think you can get a girl to fall in love with you in just ten days?’’ he asked skeptically.

Natasha nodded, her green eyes sparkling with determination. ‘’I know I can. And when I do, I want to lead on our next big advertising campaign.’’

Her boss chuckled, shaking his head in disbelief. ‘’Alright, Romanoff. You’ve got yourself a bet. But remember, the company ball is in ten days, so you better work fast.’’

Natasha grinned, feeling a bit of thrill at the challenge.

𝗬𝗢𝗨, 𝗙𝗘𝗘𝗟𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗔 𝗟𝗜𝗧𝗧𝗟𝗘 𝗘𝗫𝗖𝗜𝗧𝗘𝗠𝗘𝗡𝗧 𝗙𝗢𝗥 𝗬𝗢𝗨𝗥 𝗡𝗘𝗪 𝗔𝗥𝗧𝗜𝗖𝗟𝗘 𝗜𝗗𝗘𝗔, 𝗬𝗢𝗨 𝗗𝗘𝗖𝗜𝗗𝗘𝗗 𝗧𝗢 𝗣𝗜𝗧𝗖𝗛 𝗜𝗧 𝗧𝗢 𝗬𝗢𝗨𝗥 𝗕𝗢𝗦𝗦. You walked the hallway to your boss’s office, your heart pounding with anticipation. As you walked into the office your boss, an older woman with a stern expression, looked up from her computer. ‘’Y/N, what can I do for you?’’ she asked, her voice firm but polite.

You swallowed nervously before speaking up. ‘’I have an idea for an article I’d really like to write. It’s a bit different from my usual ‘how-to’ pieces’ pieces, but I think it could be important and engaging for our readers.’’

Your boss Pepper raised an eyebrow, clearly intrigued. ‘’Go on.’’

‘’Well, the article would be about how to lose someone in ten days by imitating certain behaviors,’’ You explained, your voice gaining confidence. ‘’I want to show that it’s not about how a women looks but how we act in relationships.’’

Pepper leaned back in her chair considering your proposal, after a moment, she nodded. ‘’Y/N, I like the idea. It’s refreshing and could be a nice change of pace for our magazine. Go ahead and start working on it. I’m looking forward to reading the final piece.’’

You beamed, thrilled that your boss was on board with your idea. ‘’Thank you so much! I won’t let you down.’’

As you left the office, you felt more motivated than ever to write your article.

𝗬𝗢𝗨 𝗞𝗡𝗘𝗪 𝗧𝗛𝗔𝗧 𝗜𝗡 𝗢𝗥𝗗𝗘𝗥 𝗧𝗢 𝗠𝗔𝗞𝗘 𝗬𝗢𝗨𝗥 𝗔𝗥𝗧𝗜𝗖𝗟𝗘 𝗔𝗨𝗧𝗛𝗘𝗡𝗧𝗜𝗖, 𝗬𝗢𝗨 𝗡𝗘𝗘𝗗𝗘𝗗 𝗜𝗡𝗙𝗢𝗥𝗠𝗔𝗧𝗜𝗢𝗡 𝗥𝗜𝗚𝗛𝗧 𝗙𝗥𝗢𝗠 𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗦𝗢𝗨𝗥𝗖𝗘, 𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗦𝗢𝗨𝗥𝗖𝗘 𝗕𝗘𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗪𝗔𝗡𝗗𝗔 𝗢𝗙 𝗖𝗢𝗨𝗥𝗦𝗘. You decided to sit down with Wanda at her apartment with some coffee to discuss Wanda’s relationship patterns hoping to come up with the ten steps that could lead to a breakup.

‘’Wanda, I need your help. I want to identify ten behaviors that you think would make someone break up with you. Can you tell me how you’ve acted in your past relationships?’’

Wanda sighed, stirring her coffee thoughtfully. ‘’Well, I guess I’ve been pretty clingy. I always want to be with my partner, like, all the time.’’

‘’Okay,’’ You said, jotting down a note. ‘’That could be Step !: Be overly clingy.’’

Wanda nodded, then continued. ‘’I also get really jealous. I question them about every person they talk to, and I get upset if they want to spend time with their friends.’’

You scribbled more notes. ‘’Step 2: Show excessive jealousy.’’

As you two continued to your conversation you guys made more steps:

Be overly clingy.

Show excessive Jealousy.

Constantly seek validation and reassurance.

Be overly possessive of their time and attention.

Make your partner feel guilty for wanting space.

Ignore your partner’s interests and focus solely on your own.

Be overly critical of your partner’s actions and choices.

Overreact to small issues and turn them into major arguments.

Expect your partner to solve all of your emotional problems. a

Constantly bring up past mistakes, even if they’ve been resolved.

𝗬𝗢𝗨, 𝗪𝗔𝗡𝗗𝗔, 𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗬𝗢𝗨𝗥 𝗢𝗧𝗛𝗘𝗥 𝗕𝗘𝗦𝗧 𝗙𝗥𝗜𝗘𝗡𝗗 𝗖𝗔𝗥𝗢𝗟 𝗪𝗔𝗟𝗞𝗘𝗗 𝗜𝗡𝗧𝗢 𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗗𝗜𝗠𝗟𝗬 𝗟𝗜𝗧 𝗕𝗔𝗥, 𝗥𝗘𝗔𝗗𝗬 𝗙𝗢𝗥 𝗔 𝗡𝗜𝗚𝗛𝗧 𝗢𝗨𝗧 𝗧𝗢 𝗨𝗡𝗪𝗜𝗡𝗗. The bar atmosphere was lively, and the sound of laughter and clinking glasses filled the air. You found a table near the back and settled down, ordering drinks.

Across the bar, Natasha sat with her coworkers Clint, Maria, and her boss David, discussing her bet and scanning the bar for a suitable candidate. Clint’s eyes landed on you, who was animatedly chatting with your friends. ‘’How about her?’’ he suggested, nodding in your direction.

Natasha followed her gaze and studied you for a moment. You seemed interesting and confident, and Natasha felt a spark of curiosity. ‘’She could be the one,’’ Natasha agreed, taking a sip of her drink. ‘’I’ll make my move.’’

David leaned back in his chair, smirking. ‘’Good luck, Romanoff. Remember, you only have ten days.’’

Natasha nodded and stood up, smoothing her clothes and taking a breath to steady her nerves. As she approached the table she couldn’t help but notice the warm friendship between the three girls.

‘’Hi,’’ Natasha said, flashing a charming smile at you. ‘’I’m Natasha. Mind if I join you?’’

You looked up, your eyes meeting Natasha’s, and you felt a flutter of surprise at the sudden introduction. ‘’Uh, sure. I’m Y/N, and these are my friends Wanda and Carol.’’

As Natasha settled into her seat, you were the first one to break the ice. ‘’So, Natasha, what brings you the bar tonight?’’

Natasha smiled, her eyes twinkling with amusement. ‘’Well, my coworkers and I were just unwinding after a long day at the office. How about you?’’

Carol chimed in, taking a sip of her drink. ‘’We’re doing the same, just trying to relax a bit. What do you work in?’’

Natasha hesitated for a moment. ‘’I work in advertising. It’s pretty exciting most of the time, bur it can be stressful too.’’

Wanda nodded understandingly. ‘’I can imagine. Y/N, Carol, and I both work at an magazine, so we know a thing or two about stress.’’

At one point, Carol brought a recent article you had written. ‘’Y/N’s last piece on the best local coffee shops was fantastic. You should give it a read, Natasha. She’s a talented writer.’’

Natasha smiled, faking interest. ‘’I’ll definitely look it up. I’m always on the hunt for a good coffee shop.’’

As the night went on, you guys had a good time laughing, sharing stories, and enjoying a few too many drinks. You felt the effects of too many drinks and began to sway unsteadily on your feet.

Natasha, noticing your condition, decided to step in and help. ‘’Hey, Y/N, you look like you might need a hand. Let me walk you to your car.’’

You were ever so grateful for the assistance leaned on Natasha as you made your way out of the bar. ‘’Thanks, Natasha.’’

‘’Don’t mention it,’’ Natasha replied, her voice warm and friendly. ‘’We all have those nights.’’

As you guys reached your car, Natasha helped you into the passenger seat, making sure you were comfortable before closing the door. Natasha scribbled her number on a piece of paper and handed it to you. ‘’I had a really great time tonight. If you’re ever up for it, maybe we could go on a proper date sometime.’’

Your checks flush as you take the paper with a smile. ‘’I’d like that, Natasha. I had a great time too.’’

With a final wave, Natasha closed the door and watched as you called a rideshare to take you home safely.

𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗡𝗘𝗫𝗧 𝗗𝗔𝗬 𝗔𝗧 𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗠𝗔𝗚𝗔𝗭𝗜𝗡𝗘 𝗢𝗙𝗙𝗜𝗖𝗘, 𝗬𝗢𝗨𝗥 𝗕𝗢𝗦𝗦, 𝗣𝗘𝗣𝗣𝗘𝗥 𝗣𝗢𝗧𝗧𝗦, 𝗚𝗔𝗧𝗛𝗘𝗥𝗘𝗗 𝗔𝗟𝗟 𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗘𝗠𝗣𝗟𝗢𝗬𝗘𝗘𝗦 𝗙𝗢𝗥 𝗔 𝗪𝗢𝗥𝗞𝗦𝗛𝗢𝗣 𝗧𝗢 𝗗𝗜𝗦𝗖𝗨𝗦𝗦 𝗧𝗛𝗘𝗜𝗥 𝗨𝗣𝗖𝗢𝗠𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗔𝗥𝗧𝗜𝗖𝗟𝗘𝗦. The room was buzzing with energy as everyone was prepared to share their ideas.

Pepper started the workshop, her voice confident and authoritative. ‘’Alright, everyone, let’s get started, I want to hear about the articles you’re working on and get a sense of how things are going, Who wants to go first?’’

Jane Foster, a science writer, eagerly raised her hand. ‘’I’m working on an article about sustainable energy solutions for the future. I think it’s going to be really informative and eye-opening.’’

As each employee shared their ideas, the atmosphere in the room became more open and calm. Shuri starts to speak animatedly. ‘’My article is about the intersection of technology and fashion. I’ve been exploring some cutting-edge designs that incorporate smart fabric and wearable tech. It’s fascinating!’’

Darcy says with a grin on her face. ‘’I’m working on a piece about the most bizarre scientific discoveries of the year. Did you know that scientists recently found a species of fish that can walk on land.

‘’No way! That’s insane, Darcy. Can’t wait to read it.’’ Carol says, smiling at Darcy.

‘’That sounds amazing, Darcy. It’s such a amazing topic and to think I’m boring you guys with my ‘how-to’ articles.’’ You say, impressed.

Finally, it’s Wanda’s turn to speak. She hesitated for a moment, her eyes filling with tears as she began to talk about her article on navigating heartbreak and healing after a breakup. ‘’I’m writing about… how to heal after a breakup,’’ Wanda’s voice broke, and she wiped away a tear. ‘’It’s something I’ve been going through a lot of recently, and I think sharing my experience could help others.’’

The room went silent, and Carol reached out to place a comforting hand on Wanda's shoulder. ‘’I’m sorry, Wanda. We’re all here for you.’’

You chimed in, your voice supportive. ‘’Your article is going to help a lot of people, Wanda. You’re doing something really brave by sharing your story. And that’s why I’m writing my how to lose somebody in ten days article’’

Wanda nodded grateful for the support of her friends and co-workers, Pepper spoke up, ‘’Thank you for sharing, Wanda. It’s important for us to cover a wide range of topics, and your honesty will resonate with our readers.’’

Everyone shared their ideas and got feedback and the workshop actually proved to be productive.

𝗡𝗔𝗧𝗔𝗦𝗛𝗔 𝗦𝗔𝗧 𝗕𝗔𝗖𝗞 𝗜𝗡 𝗛𝗘𝗥 𝗖𝗛𝗔𝗜𝗥, 𝗛𝗘𝗥 𝗢𝗙𝗙𝗜𝗖𝗘 𝗗𝗢𝗢𝗥 𝗦𝗟𝗜𝗚𝗛𝗧𝗟𝗬 𝗔𝗝𝗔𝗥 𝗔𝗦 𝗖𝗟𝗜𝗡𝗧 𝗟𝗘𝗔𝗡𝗘𝗗 𝗔𝗚𝗔𝗜𝗡𝗦𝗧 𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗗𝗢𝗢𝗥𝗪𝗔𝗬, 𝗕𝗢𝗧𝗛 𝗗𝗘𝗘𝗣 𝗜𝗡 𝗖𝗢𝗡𝗩𝗘𝗥𝗦𝗔𝗧𝗜𝗢𝗡.

‘’So, Nat, you’ve got ten days to make someone fall in love with you, and then lose them,’’ Clint said, rubbing his chin thoughtfully. ‘’What’s your plan?’’

Natasha sighed, tapping her prn against the notepad on her desk. ‘’I’ve been thinking about it, and I’ve come up with a few steps that should do the trick.’’

Clint raised an eyebrow, curious. ‘’Alright, let’s hear them.’’

Natasha began listing her ideas.

First, I need to reel them in. Show genuine interest in their life, be charming and attentive.

Next, I’ll start to open up about my own life. Share personal stories to build trust and connection.

Then, I’ll plan a romantic date. Something special and memorable to really solidify the bond.

After that, I’ll start to become a bit needy. Text and call more frequently, maybe even show up unannounced.

For step five, I’ll start to become overly possessive. Question their friendships, demand more of their time.

With step six, I’ll introduce some jealousy. Flirt with someone else in their presence, just enough to make them doubt my loyalty.

Next, I’ll pick fights over trivial things.

For step eight, I’ll become a bit controlling. Start making decisions for them, and criticize their choices.

Then, I’ll drop the bomb. Reveal a secret that could potentially shatter their trust in me

Finally, when they’re at their breaking point, I’ll push them away for good. Make it clear that I’m not the right person for them.

Clint nodded slowly, impressed by Natasha’s thorough plan. ‘’Well, that sounds like a sure way to lose someone. But are you sure you want to go through with this? It seems like an awful lot of emotional manipulation.’’

Natasha hesitated for a moment thinking back to her pleasant encounter with you the other night. ‘’I know it’s not ideal, but I have to win this bet. It’s about more than just pride and getting the next big advertising campaign. It’s about proving that I can succeed at any challenge.’’

𝗔 𝗙𝗘𝗪 𝗗𝗔𝗬𝗦 𝗔𝗙𝗧𝗘𝗥 𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗘𝗡𝗖𝗢𝗨𝗡𝗧𝗘𝗥, 𝗡𝗔𝗧𝗔𝗦𝗛𝗔 𝗗𝗘𝗖𝗜𝗗𝗘𝗗 𝗜𝗧 𝗪𝗔𝗦 𝗧𝗜𝗠𝗘 𝗧𝗢 𝗠𝗔𝗞𝗘 𝗛𝗘𝗥 𝗠𝗢𝗩𝗘, 𝗦𝗛𝗘 𝗣𝗜𝗖𝗞𝗘𝗗 𝗨𝗣 𝗛𝗘𝗥 𝗣𝗛𝗢𝗡𝗘 𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗧𝗘𝗫𝗧𝗘𝗗 𝗬𝗢𝗨.

Natasha: Hey! Y/N It’s Natasha from the other night. I hope you’ve recovered from the other night. I was wondering if you’d like to join me at a boxing match this Friday? I think it could be a fun first date.

You: Hi, Natasha! I’m feeling much better, thanks for asking. A boxing match sounds like a great idea! I’m in!

When Friday arrived, you and Natasha met outside the arena, both excited. As you took your seats you decided it was time to start implementing your plan. You glanced at Natasha, putting your first step into action being overly demanding. ‘’Natasha, I’m really thirsty. Can you go grab me some sparkling water? I don’t want to miss the beginning of the match.’’

Natasha, determined to show her charming and attentive side of her plan, agreed without hesitation. ‘’Of course! I’ll be right back.’’

Natasha returned to the seats just as the match was about to start, a sparkling water in hand. You looked at her apologetically. ‘’Actually, I changed my mind. Can you get me a soda instead?’’

Trying to not show her frustration, Natasha plastered a smile and headed back to the concession stand. Throughout the night, you continued to be demanding, asking Natasha to fetch you snacks and making her miss the crucial moments of the match. Natasha worked hard to be attentive and understanding.

As you left the arena, You smiled, ‘’Thanks for tonight, Natasha. I had a great time, despite my many requests.’’

Natasha smiled and shrugged. ‘’No problem, Y/N. I enjoyed it too.’’

You said your goodbyes and parted ways.

[moiravim]

Widow friends

PLATONIC Yelena Belova x GN!Reader

•Yelena met you from her sister. You worked with Natasha and the avengers for a few years but since endgame you've spent most of your time with Yelena.

•You and Yelena work together than usual friends. The second you two met you just clicked. You're opposites and similar at the same time.

•Yelena is protective of you and uses the excuse 'it's what Nat would've wanted'. For example, when a group of friends were harassing you and Yelena cussed them out, scaring them off.

•You try giving Yelena a better taste in food but she insists Mac and cheese with hot sauce is the best.

•During the events of the Hawkeye series, you being in denial over the fact of Clint killing Natasha. Yelena convincing you it's true, pretty much manipulating you.

When the truth comes out she'll apologize for any arguments caused by her but will refuse to say you were right.

•Having 'sleepovers' every night up to the point where your roommates.

•"Can I make dinner tonight?" Yelena asks with excitement in her voice. "As long as you don't make Mac and cheese with hot sauce...". She made mac and cheese with hot sauce. (This most definitely happened).

•Every once in a while she'll get nightmares or flashbacks of Natasha and you'll have to comfort her.

•Over all, you and Yelena are an inseparable pair. The two of you get along better than any of the other avengers and will always stick together.

[shiningstarr15]

“Are you warm now?”

“Yes I am.”

“Glad I could help.”

I just have a funny feeling that my followers were missing my widow sisters content 😅😬 am I right? 😝

Well if so then here ya go lol

Since my fic from last year, Kittens and Cuddles, is my most popular fic to date, I decided to draw a scene from it. And obviously it had to be this one 🥰

If you recall, this is very early in their reunion and they are still exploring their newly rediscovered sisterly relationship, so Yelena is very cautious and nervous unlike she is in my other drawings. In case you were curious, now you know 😉

I literally draw them different EVERY TIME. No two drawings are ever alike 😅 I’m struggling to find exactly what works and I keep playing with different ideas. An example being making Natasha’s head here less elongated bc in truth, Scarlett’s head isn’t longer than Florence’s, it’s just skinnier. Flo has those puffy cheeks lol 😬🤭

———————————

Also if anyones wondering, yes I am still writing TROYB, I’ve been working on the next chapter but something happened that impacted my job and having to deal with that depleted my motivation. I’m working as best as I can to get out of these sticky situations. Honestly the last few months have just been crazy.

Also also, if you are missing me writing for the sisters, I am still taking requests for pre-IW stories 💞 so please feel free to send a request into my inbox.

One more thing, if anyone genuinely just wants to talk. Either black widow or widow sisters or mcu or anything really, please don’t hesitate to dm me. I’m very shy when it comes to making the first move but I am always more than happy to meet new people and make new friends 💖 I’m pretty open minded too so you will always have a safe space with me 🥰🥰

Anyway, enjoy! 💞💞

And If you haven’t read it or forgot about it, check out the fic on ao3 😉

[justiceiswater]

sweet babies! so soft and precious and full of hesitant glances and touches. i love the slow and steady pressure nat put on her so she didnt scare her off. gently hitting on her lol

Sweet

Summary: (Natasha x  shy!reader) Your old friend Sam recruits your help for a low-key work party, ya know, at the Avengers Compound. Of course you’re the type of soft-hearted civvie that could fall head over heels for a particular red-headed assassin while you’re there.

Prompt/Request: This is not exactly the silly drunken interaction @whyhello-there requested… There are drinks and it’s lighthearted, but it’s more a bunch of sober spies being cute than it is drunk shenanigans.

Warnings: A little swearing, FLUFF

Word Count: 2518

Keep reading

[writing-house-of-m]

Falling for you

Natasha Romanoff x Reader

Summary: Natasha is in love with you and decides to tell you

A/N: I was so impressed with myself when I came up with the title lol The request can be found here. Comments, reblogs and likes are appreciated!

Prompt: "Oh, I'm falling in love."

"It was when I saw you giving flowers to Wanda once. I saw the gesture and it hit me like a ton of bricks. The way you looked at her. I wanted someone to look at me like that. I learned afterwards not 'someone,' I wanted you to look at me like that.

"It was as if my mind held up a queue card telling me how I felt about you. I realised, 'Oh, I'm falling in love,' but the more I thought about it the more I realised I've been in love with you for a while and I didn't know what to do."

Natasha started speaking after you made a joke about her playing hide and seek. Nobody knew where she was when you noticed her missing for a while and got curious where she might have been. She was looking out at the view motionless before you got there for you don't know how long.

You regret making your joke.

"I don't even know why I'm telling you all this. Maybe because I'm sick of holding it all in.

"In the red room it was always 'love is just something used to brainwash childish minds', 'A chemical reaction, nothing more' and for the longest time I agreed. I have never experienced it before and didn't think I ever would…

"Until you."

She looks at you emotionally. It's the most vulnerable you have seen her. The 'Black Widow' on the verge of tears because of you,

"Natasha,"

And there is nothing you can say to make her feel better.

"I do love you, just not in the same way. I'm really sorry," you see in the way Natasha drops her head, the devastation she is feeling, "but my heart will always belong to Wanda."

She lets out a sad laugh, looking out at the setting sun in the horizon, orange and pink painting the sky, "Figures," she scoffs, "the person I fall for, already taken," she says, sniffling.

There are a few moments of tense silence before you decide to break it, in hopes to lighten the mood a little, "Well, if it's any consolation Wanda aspires to have your 'hot bod'," you jest, then raise your hands and eyebrows innocently, "her words, not mine."

It does make her laugh but shortly after, silence prevails and you both bask in it. You stay there in each others presence long after darkness takes over and white dots fill the night sky.

…

Shortly after your conversation on the roof you move out of the compound. It was something you and Wanda had been discussing anyway but you thought it would be easier for Natasha if you weren't there. To you it would have felt like you were rubbing your relationship in her face after her confession. But for Natasha, she missed seeing you everyday.

As always life continues, work takes over. Your time together is reduced to when you are assigned to the same missions. Natasha realises quickly her feelings for you will never falter. So she makes the most of the time she gets with you.

It doesn't take long for that to be taken from her as well.

…

Natasha felt your presence missing from this world. Prior to everything that happened, you hadn't been at the compound for the longest time but at least she knew you were out there and happy. But now? There was a gaping hole in the shape of you that was missing and it was unfair for everyone, not just herself.

It is why she makes the decision to go to Vormir.

The world is better with you in it.

Even if she won't be here to witness it.

As she is falling to her demise, the sound of wind rushing past her ears she closes her eyes to see your smiling face.

The memory of you stood on the rooftop trying to make her laugh. The picture can be compared to a piece of artwork with the way the warm setting sunlight hits off your skin and makes your eyes shine.

Natasha is glad to have such a picturesque image of you in her final seconds that she can find comfort in behind her eyelids.

Despite the cold climate and the circumstances her body is filled with warmth knowing she is the reason there is the possibility to bring you back. At least then you will have a chance at starting that family you and Wanda announced.

As that final image slips away along with her consciousness, Natasha thinks about the fact that even though she could never have you. You always had her.

[chaxan08]

Yelena: Our relationship is strictly professional.

Kate, sitting on Yelena's lap: Absolutely, only business.

[quietlyimplode]

ignite your bones

After the fall of General Dreykov, and the remnants of the Red Room still at large, Natasha first year at SHIELD is anything but healing. Labeled a traitor and a turncoat, Natasha tries to find her footing in a strange new world.

Whumptober 2024: Day 30 - holding back tears

Warnings: grief/loss, dissociation

Word Count: 1.3k (gif not mine)

Summary: sometimes crying for yourself and all that you’ve lost, can be cathartic

a/n. One to go - for those that have come along for the ride, followed it all from start to finish and perhaps have been lurking in the back, thank you for all your comments and likes. I think until made to upload and post every day I forget how hard it it, how tedious and oftentimes him is much I want to keep fic to myself because it’s such a feat in putting it out there. So for those that have interacted I thank you from the bottom of my heart for encouraging this. Until tomorrow dear ones.

(Also if you’re American; please vote blue like your life depends on it, because you never know how much your politics affects everyone else’s, oftentimes our lives depend on it to)

Masterlist

Whumptober Masterlist

.

A response comes days after Maria takes her letter. Natasha is unsure how it got to Olivia, and even less sure how the response comes back.

The folded paper in her hand is more than a note, it’s the first piece of mail she’s ever received.

Natasha tries not to think too hard about it; if she thought about all the firsts she’s had since arriving here, then she’d probably be overwhelmed.

She can’t bring herself to open it.

There’s so much hope that hangs in the balance.

If it’s not what she expects, if Olivia can’t give her what she wants, she knows she will be devastated, the kind she won’t ever get over.

She doesn’t feel brave enough.

Not yet.

Clint brings breakfast and seems to notice something is wrong.

He asks her, but she shrugs him off, pretending to smile even as he cocks his head in worry.

They debrief and she mumbles her way through it. Natasha can’t concentrate, thoughts seem fleeting, and she worries about the ‘what ifs’ that hide under the bed.

They eat lunch in the cafeteria and Maria joins them. Natasha sits passively, not eating and watching everyone else in the room.

They watch her too. They seem to side eye her and she openly stares.

She doesn’t care enough to be subtle. If they’re looking, then she will too.

After they beat Clint in front of her, she doesn’t care about appearances and there’s no Thompson to threaten her for misstepping.

Maria tells her that both of them have a meeting and asks if she wants to go to the library.

Truthfully, Natasha just wants to be alone.

She shakes her head, and tells them to drop her back.

She’s still not allowed to be left alone in SHIELD. Probably worried about what could happen to her, or perhaps what she might do to others.

Clint gives her one last look of worry before the door shuts.

Natasha sits on the floor, across the room, staring at the bed.

What if Olivia knows more?

What if she can tell her something, anything about her past?

What if she can’t?

It feels like a battle of wills, stuck in the in-between of knowledge and not.

Natasha picks at her nails, unconsciously bites the inside of her mouth.

She hears Clint knocking and chooses to ignore it.

He calls out and she replies that she’s okay, just wants to be alone; and, to her surprise he leaves.

She’ll never get over having her own space and her requests respected.

Another first.

She stares at the bed.

She can do it.

But what if?

.

Natasha swallows.

She knows she’s lost time. The world feels quieter in the dark of night, even though her room has no windows. It’s the principle. Night holds a special quietness within it.

The cadence of the universe seems to be something she’s always been in tune with, and probably, has saved her once or twice.

The letter is in her hand.

She can’t remember getting it.

Just like she can’t remember why there are half crescent moons embedded into her palm where her nails have been digging in.

There’s no writing on the outside.

She can see and feel the writing.

Olivia must press hard, when she writes.

The paper seems to be stock printer paper.

Not lined.

The black pen has a shadow that she can see.

Taking a deep breath, she opens it.

‘Natasha,’ it reads.

Tears well in Natasha’s eyes.

She can’t help it and it surprises her as she swipes them away.

‘Thank you for your note.’

Natasha bites down heavily on her lip, trying to hold herself together, taking a deep breath.

‘I know. She was safe with you. If we could save all those we loved, then the world would be a much kinder place. I have so much to tell you. And likewise, I think you can fill in some gaps for me. You’re not alone.”

Natasha forces herself to take a shaky breath.

‘I’ll be here to answer all the questions I can. But first, you must make agent. Once you’ve done that, meet me in Seattle. I’m sorry that this isn’t easier, and for all that’s happened along the way. Meet me in Seattle and we will talk more.’

The letter signs off with a cursive O.

Natasha lowers the paper, feeling emotions that had been pushed down, repressed for years.

Tears stream now, and she lets herself sob.

She holds the letter to get chest.

Memories, feelings, grief, loss, pain and hope all curl in her chest and she cries.

Natasha feels her breath catch as she lets out a moan, and she lets a wail go, the sadness of losing herself, her past tied into starting a new life, even if it had not given her the safety that she had expected.

It was something.

Olivia had given her hope of something she had never even dreamed of.

Answers.

Why her? Why had it been her abandoned and sold to the red room?

She cries for her younger self, that she could never go back and save.

Memories of Yelena pushing back her newly blue hair and hugging her, telling her she’d miss the red but how cool she looked with it.

Memories of her first kill, the trial of the silent knife as she was given her first weapon, and the training they’d received turned into something vital.

She takes a breath but lets the tears continue.

Such indulgence in emotion, she thinks, as she sniffs and tries to swallow, feeling her ears block and unblock.

Reading the letter again, more tears come.

Natasha doesn’t know how long she lets herself cry, but for the first time ever, she does it without reserve, without restraint and lets herself feel the feelings that flow through her body and cries herself to sleep.

.

Clint knocks and waits until she opens the door.

He’s slightly earlier, worried since the night before, that she had been grappling with bigger thoughts.

He knew what was in the letter from Olivia and what it promised.

So did Maria.

They’d had a discussion as she’d walked him to the car, about Natasha becoming an agent.

There’d be a board review before the decision, where they’d have to give evidence of her debriefs, her progress and usefulness to SHIELD.

Clint was ready for it.

He’d been making Maria practice with him, giving evidence to support her, so that he was ready for all the arguments they may raise.

She even had her own.

He’d asked her why, and Maria had shrugged.

Clint didn’t know what had passed between them when he was in hospital but he knew Maria had been affected in a way that maybe even she didn’t understand.

What he did know, was that Maria knew Natasha’s worth, and even perhaps more than that, Maria knew her own worth - just how vital she was to the functioning of SHIELD.

Coulson had also been promoted.

The strike teams that had been sent after them needed to be replaced. Coulson had asked Clint if he wanted to become a part of one, but Clint wasn’t sure what that would mean for Natasha.

He hadn’t given a straightforward answer, instead asking Coulson the one question that was on his mind- What would happen to her?

Coulson hadn’t responded. Clint thought maybe because he didn’t have the answer just yet.

Clint sighs and knocks again.

Natasha opens the door; and smiles shallowly at him.

He can tell she’s been crying, eyes rimmed red and face flushed.

Speechless, he fumbles over words to ask if she wants to go for breakfast.

Nodding, she zips up her hoodie, and he realises it’s the first time she’s worn something other than the SHIELD issued clothing.

.

[inlovewithfairies]

OPEN REQUESTS!

Halo, i want to write some blackhill in this beautiful day of fuck secret invasion i write soft drabbles so if u want to send me a prompt or comment something you would like to see in something i write on my own i'll be grateful <3