#black girls break the internet
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synvil · 16 days ago
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Starting Out // VID : 001 » Viewing Pleasure (( Camgirl! Series ))
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a/n : sorry for the wait! i had to figure out how to get started tbh and i really didn’t think id get such love from everyone!!! <3 it means so much. hope you guys enjoy! taglist at the bottom!
synopsis : you start your adventure as the next camera girl streamer online, and receive an unexpected surprise on your first stream.
series masterlist : Viewing Pleasure
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“You can’t do this, [Name].”
You heave a sigh as you readjust the camera on your monitor, managing to have saved up enough to afford one to finally get this started.
This idea has been in the works for a while, you attempting to split every cent you could save between bills and buying the equipment you needed to begin streaming, and finally you were ready.
JJ doesn’t receive an answer from you and he huffs before walking over and grabbing your wrist to stop you. “Come on, [Nickname].”
“JJ, it doesn’t hurt to try, okay? I need the money, otherwise i’ll be homeless within a month.” You defend yourself as you pull away from his grip and continue to adjust until the monitor displays the proper position. You break into a smile and go to adjust how close and how far you can make the camera go and JJ shakes his head.
"What if I gave you the money? I can lend you some if you need, Kie and JB made me start saving and-" You snap to him with narrowed eyes. "No way, J. I'm not taking your money, I don't want to owe anything."
The blonde just crosses his arms as he watches you look at yourself through the monitor, with him in the background.
“I think this looks good.” You plaster a grin but JJ heaves a sigh at you. You clearly weren’t gonna change your mind. He goes up to you and places a hand on your shoulder. “Okay, i’m telling you this as a friend, but [Name], this is a bad idea. You don’t know what kind of creeps are on the internet and even worse, once your body is on there, there’s no going back.”
It was sweet how concerned the blonde was for you but you were starting to get agitated at his persistence.
“Don’t you think I already know that, J?” I scoff as I brush off his hands. “Like I said, I don’t have a choice here, man, I’m about to be evicted. I heard some of the kooks talk about this and i’d figure i’d give it a try, so please let this go, okay?”
Whether it was the determination in your tone or the desperation in your eyes, it causes him to falter for a second and JJ pulls back slightly, taking a step back with a small nod of his head. “..alright, i get it. fine.”
You watch him carefully, not wanting to let guilt take over you for snapping at him like that but he seems to understand enough and you force your eyes away and back to the camera.
You do some last minute touches before making sure your profile was settled before starting to prep for your first stream.
JJ stares at your figure from behind, silent and in thought before he heads to the door. “.. I’ll see you later, [Nickname].” He says before shutting the door and you flinch slightly at the slam before exhaling softly.
If only you knew.
Fresh out of the shower, shaven and smooth, You adjust the clothes on your body before leaning back in your chair. Double checking your camera again, you take a deep breath. “You got this.. you’re just starting out..”
You wore a white button up that was left unbuttoned and just a cover up for your shoulders, and a black laced bralette underneath. Pairing that with a midnight blue spandex shorts as well. It wasn’t too modest but wasn’t too showy for your first stream.
Makeup was done, going for a natural look.
Mic was okay, picking up sounds good enough for you.
And you were comfortable in your chair and your room, having already cleaned up the background for aesthetics.
You had already written up a tier list of your donations that people could do for requests, aside from random custom ones, which you left on screen for people to see. It wasn’t anything too unreasonable and you were able to adjust anytime. So hopefully viewers would enter the stream soon.
With one press of a button, the camera begin to blink red, and you were now live.
Lips curl into a small smile at the sight and you watch yourself as slowly, one by one, viewers tread in.
“Hi, everyone..”
You fidget with one of your perfectly manicured nails for a minute as you wait and think about what to say.
“So.. this is my first stream, I won’t do anything crazy for today.. i’m just starting out after all.” It felt a bit embarrassing, you weren’t sure what to do and if you wanted to show your face in the first place, but you just reminded yourself of the potential threat of eviction and pushed through.
“New face? What a cutie~”
“You’re so beautifullll <3”
“Hot af”
Even though you knew these were potential creepy old men who were watching you, the praises still felt a bit nice, and if you were lucky enough, it wasn’t people near you.
You smile sweetly for the camera and tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. “Thank you for the compliment. I hope you don’t mind my outfit choice.” You glance down at your torso, your skin and stomach exposed because of the bralette which tightly held your breasts together with great lift.
You hug your arms a little which accentuated them more, and comments and viewers began to flood in faster.
“So hot 🔥”
“take the shirt off bbg”
“shit you look good affff”
You can’t help the giggle that escapes your glossy lips at the reactions you get, a faintest blush warming your cheeks and eventually small donations began coming in. “Thank you~!”
"u single?" "fuck, a new girl to jack off 2" "'Anonymous' donated $10. ur so sexy" "@oldpervdude donated $30." "@KookTopper donated $300. 'You're so hot.'"
"Wow, thank you so much for all the donations, you're all so sweet." You can feel the excitement building up at the prospect of being able to afford this month's rent. "And thank you, @KookTopper~"
Fortunately within the flood of perverted compliments, there were a few that were asking questions about you, which you happily answered with relief.
Sitting behind his desktop mindlessly, a certain kook was scrolling through the internet and his social media, when a friend sends him a message.
His phone buzzes on the tabletop, making Rafe pick it up to read the notification. It was from Topper Thornton. ‘Fuck, Rafe, look at this. Click the link I just sent.’
"www.camgirlstreamers.com/[Name]/synvil.obxlive"
Rafe furrows his brows at the link as his thumb presses the button and it wires him to a streamers website, immediately to a live stream where a girl is currently on screen with her top sliding down her shoulders, the hem of her spandex riding up her thick thighs. The sight makes Rafe taken back, his lips suddenly becoming dry as he listens to the sound of her adorable giggles.
"Fuck.." On the side of her streams were her social media links, so after transferring the link to his desktop while he used his phone to go through her social media.
"[Name].." Her name rolled off his tongue as he murmurs it in the private of his room. He scrolls through your photos on IG, seeing your beautiful smile in a lot of them and various photos of your interests and hobbies.
Now, Rafe wasn't really one to be interested in camera girls, usually preferring the real life, in person experience instead, but lately, none of the women in all of Kildare was really attractive to him. He was starting to get bored, but this?
The curve of your breasts, the innocence of your eyes and the sexy plump thighs in those spandex that left much to his imagination of your ass.. it made him excited.
"Now.. how the hell do I add my card on here?.."
"Ugh, those disgusting bastards.."
A particular dirty blonde has been watching a live stream since it began, and reading the flood of comments talking about the girl's body filled him with disgust.
But what was worse, was that he felt the exact same way. "Shit.. you look so fucking hot, [Name].."
JJ stares intensely at the screen of his phone, watching you tease the camera by sliding the button up down your shoulders a bit. He sighs a bit breathily, contemplating for a moment but then the next second, adds his credit card information into the site without hesitation.
If she wasn't going to take his money, he'll just find another way to help you out. Besides, this benefits him too. And he was willing to spend every penny.
As you talk to your viewers, teasing them a little by stripping yourself of your button up leaving you in the bralette and spandex, your phone buzzes. You pick up your phone and furrow your brows. It was from Instagram.
'@TheKookKing has followed you.'
"Hm.." You shrug it off for a minute and set your phone down, looking back to your stream.
You hum softly, having discarded your button up to the side already and in just your bralette and shorts.
“@TheKookKing has donated $1000”
“Mmh, a new donation? Let’s see here.. o-one thousand dollars? from @TheKookKing.. wow, thank you so much. And thank you for the follow on IG, if you’re the same person. If you guys haven’t already, my social medias are linked on the side of my profile.”
As you take in the notification that pops up at the top of the chatroom, the message follows after.
“Be a good girl and sit on your knees in front of the camera.”
Your eyes widen at the demand as a small flush overtakes your cheeks. "Oh.. sure." With a donation like that, you almost couldn’t refuse, as you do what it says and move your chair aside, getting onto the ground and on your knees.
The position causes your spandex to rise up your thighs, exposing your skin further.
Just then, another message pops up. A donation of five hundred dollars from @ThePogueMechanic.
“@ThePogueMechanic has donated $500”
“Fuck— now open your legs wide for me, princess.”
The warmth spreads on your cheeks at the request and you do it, the tight spandex stretching as you sit on your knees with your thighs wide. It shows off your camel toe, revealing your lack of panties.
The chat quickly spams and floods with various emojis and the viewers going crazy.
"Oh so hot"
"🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥”
"SEXY GIRL FUCK"
"Anonymous donated $50."
"@TheBarracudaMan donated $100."
However when another message pings, it isn’t directed towards you.
“Fuck off, Pogue. She’s mine.”
“Screw you, Kook. Princess belongs to me.”
"H-Hey, let's not do that, okay?- Why don’t I distract you?" You say, hoping to alleviate the situation, not wanting to cause any issues on your first stream. It seems to have worked a bit and you decide to change the subject by biting your lip and ignoring the redness of your cheeks as your hand travels down your body.
Your fingers meet the heat between your thighs and you rub your clit through the thin fabric of your spandex lightly.
And quickly the chat changes once again, and the two viewers who were briefly fighting in chat, were now shut silent behind their computers.
“Anonymous has donated $80”
“Anonymous has donated $25”
“Anonymous has donated $5”
“@KookTopper has donated $200”
But considering this was only your first stream and you were already feeling embarrassed and overwhelmed, you quickly stand up. The spandex had ridden up, the sudden movement also causing your breasts to bounce lightly as you lean forward. "U-uhm, I think this is all for today. I'll come on again soon, thank you everyone. See you next time." Your face was out of view and you shut off the stream.
And the two men behind their screens share the same thought, the memory of you rubbing your pussy through your shorts engraved in their memories.
"Shit."
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a/n: ahhh so glad to finally get it done, I hope it reaches your expectations!! thank you so much for the support! and also, I really appreciate the patience. and do not worry, im working on the next chapter already :)
sorry if it seems so abrupt and rushed, it’s also not proofread.
taglist : @haruvalentine4321 @lilithblackkk @sleepiibunniiii @kiiyomei
Synvil™️ Do not copy my work.
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baby-yongbok · 10 months ago
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Cam Star
Camboy!Hyunjin x Camgirl!Reader
♡ Genre - Smut ♡ Word Count - 10k ✧ Masterlist ✧
♡ Summary - You haven’t seen Hyunjin since the CamStar convention but he’s been on your mind and you’ve been on his. Today’s the day of your collaboration with him, a spicy show for hundreds to watch but the cam is the last thing on your mind.
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♡ A/N: I started this as soon as I saw that gif of Hyunjin on live. I wrote this based on one of the many thoughts that gif brought me but it took me FOREVER to complete this. I'm glad that I can at least post it on his birthday! This is the longest fic I've written on this account and I'm proud of it. I hope that you enjoy! 💕+ reader is depicted as chubby/plus size and is a POC ♡ MDNI
♡ Warnings: Use of marijuana and alcohol, Foot worship/play, unprotected piv, exhibitionism? - That should be all, let me know if I missed any!
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You’ve had a month to prepare for tonight's plans. Everything around you is perfect, your sheets are soft and clean. Your set is lit to perfection and the new matching co-ords that you're sporting for tonight's show were picked out carefully by you and your best friend, Felix, who happens to be a close friend of tonight's guest. You’ve confided in your friend for weeks about your guest's preferences to try and calm your nerves but he didn’t tell you anything that you didn’t already know. 
You would think that maintaining a spot as one of the top five creators on CamStar for two years would make you feel more like a seasoned professional but that couldn’t be further from the truth. Every time that you think about the fact that you’re about to collaborate with Hyunjin, one of the top three male creators on the site, you want to scream and kick your feet like a flustered school girl. Hyunjin is the epitome of beauty, that might sound a bit extreme but it’s true. He’s captivating and shameless with what he does, always begging the chat to let him cum and making such intense and sexy eye contact with the lens that you feel like you’re right there with him. You’ve gotten off to his cams more times than you’d ever admit to him and according to Felix his friend has done the same to yours.  
The mirror would be sick of seeing you if it were a person because here you are standing in front of it for the hundredth time tonight brushing off your short shorts and pulling up your tube top. The deep golden yellow fabric is nearly see through against you and you can’t help but to think that maybe you should change. Maybe this is too much? I mean yeah you’re about to be naked on camera for others across the internet to see and you’re more than comfortable in this outfit but what if Hyunjin doesn’t like it? Felix said that he thinks that his friend will go speechless when he sees you but what if he’s wrong? What if - oh fuck, he’s here.
The echo of the doorbell through your living room leaves you frozen for a second too long before you break into a soft jog over to your front door. You slide across the hardwood with your fuzzy pineapple print socks and take a deep breath as you twist the knob. There he is. Your eyes meet his for a second and you both smile as you take each other in. He’s chosen his usual laid back attire for tonight's show as you expected. His oversized Hilfiger t-shirt and black cargo sweats don't surprise you one bit but you seemed to have caught him a bit off guard with your choice of threads tonight.
“Hey, you’re early.” Hyunjin stares at you, wide eyed and silent for a second too long before he’s clearing his throat and lifting his gaze from your bare thighs to your eyes.  
“Yeah, I uh - roads were clearer than I thought.” You step aside, inviting him in and you can feel the nervous pit in your stomach deepen as he brushes past you. 
“I told you they would be.” Once he slips his shoes off and drops his bag at the door the two of you stand in awkward silence as you steal glances and open and close your mouths for what feels like an eternity. 
“It’s uh- good to see you.” He leans in for a hug, wrapping his arms around your waist and you follow his lead, lacing your arms around his neck as you sigh.
“We’re being such losers right now.” The vibration of his chuckle as he pulls away brings a smile to your face.
“Can you blame me? I haven’t seen you in what? Five months? Maybe six.” You hum, making your way over to your couch and plopping down onto the soft cherry red cushion. 
“Six months, yeah. I mean, we’ve kinda kept in touch since the convention.”
“Commenting on instagram photos and retweeting posts do not count as keeping in touch and you know it.” A blush creeps across your cheeks as he sits next to you, elbows resting on his knees and that damned smirk on his lips. It’s the same one that he uses during his livestreams, the same one that you’ve cum to over and over again. 
“Yeah I know, I know.” You cross your legs underneath you, turning towards him. “You dyed your hair?”
“Yeah, wanted to do something different. I haven’t gone live with it yet so tonight will be the debut for this look.”
“I’m honored that you’ve chosen to debut it with me.” Your fingers rake through his soft locks as you take in the new cut.
“Of course, Princess.” The fact that you aren’t gasping for air right now and appear to be keeping your cool is actually magic. Pure witchcraft, honestly. How can someone make a pet name sound so good? “I need to get used to calling you that so I don’t say your name on cam.”
Your blush deepens as you stare down at his lap. Right, you forgot that you go by Princess when you’re on cam. He’s only calling you that cause that’s what you go by, gosh are you that down bad already? 
“I don’t have to change much, Jinnie.” You sing his name a bit and he smiles at the sound of it. 
“You’re lucky that I go by my name or else you’d have to moan something outlandish like Your Majesty or something.” You fall into a laughing fit, falling onto his shoulder dramatically for support. “Maybe I’ll have you call me that since you seem to enjoy it so much.”
His laugh mirrors yours as he watches you, your head resting on his shoulder with your eyes shut and your mouth hung open as you try to catch your breath. He’s never heard a prettier laugh in his life, he swears it. “Please do not make me call you that I won’t be able to keep a straight face.”
“You already won’t be able to do that though.” He grins as your laughing dies down and you take a final deep breath. Your previous laughter has started to turn into something else entirely. You can feel the heat start to surround the two of you but you’re not even on set or in front of the camera yet. This is what happened last time that you and Hyunjin were together. Everyone at the convention swore that you two had undeniable chemistry. 
“I would say that you’ll have to get used to moaning Princess but something tells me that you already have experience with that.” His eyebrows raise as he leans back into your couch.
“What gives you that idea?”
“Word on the street is that you watch my shows.” There goes that smirk again. He lets his head fall back against the back of your couch as he sighs a bit. 
“Is that right?” He lifts his head, inspecting your matching smirk as he licks over his bottom lip. “Well what if I told you that I heard that you are a big fan of my shows too.”
Your blush is back as you tongue your cheek. Damn Felix and his big mouth! Why would he tell him that? Just play it cool. “Where did you get that information?”
“From the same street that you got your information.” The eye contact that the two of you hold is strong and hot like a steady flame. You watch as his eyes trail from your lips and down the curve of your neck for just a second before rushing back up to meet your gaze but instead of his honey pupils meeting yours he’s met with the view of your own lustful gaze trailing down the slope of his toned arm. 
You’ve done other collabs with people that you're close to and some that you’ve only spoken to for a couple of hours at a convention so you can confidently say that you have never felt as titillated as you do with Hyunjin right now. To be fair, you didn’t have a crush on any of those other people. 
You may not talk to Hyunjin as much as you desire to but you’ve watched every single one of his cams and SFW Q & A’s as well as his YouTube vlogs that you only just found out about days after you asked him to collab with you. He’s mentioned his art to you before but it wasn’t until you came across his channel that you saw just how good he is with a brush or almost any other medium. That mixed with being able to enjoy his everyday lifestyle content and his breathtaking dance covers has made you feel closer to him than you felt before. Though you do find it kind of embarrassing that you’ve gotten close to him through a screen instead of real life.
 Little do you know that Hyunjin is no better than you when it comes to consuming an unspeakable amount of your content. Every single cam that you’ve ever done has been viewed by him at least once and he’s not ashamed to say that he’s even paid to view the premium content.
 He found out about your lifestyle and mental health blog around the same time that you found out about his YouTube channel and he proceeded to scroll all the way down to your first post and back up again. He watched each and every one of your advice videos on the site and has read every word that you’ve ever written and posted. He found himself falling in love with the way that your mind works. He loves the way that you look at life and how you’re able to transform your feelings into breath-taking statements. He nearly forgot about your cams when he found your site. 
“So you think that I’m used to moaning your name?” His question pulls your attention back up to his gaze. 
“Maybe you moan it in your free time.” You shrug with a wink, turning away from him quickly but luckily you don’t miss the smile and blush that he tries to hide from you. 
“I could say the same for you.” He grumbles under his breath as he lets his head fall back against the couch again. You both sit silently, trying your best not to smile like an idiot in front of the other. “Did you pre-game?”
“Uh no not yet, didn’t know if you wanted to join.” You stand, raising your arms to stretch a bit and shamelessly giving him the perfect view of your ass in your shorts. “I know it’s not really your thing.”
“Mm.” He must be enjoying the view. “I’m your guest, I follow your vibe. I don’t mind joining you.”
You hum, making your way over to the black box on your TV stand. “You smoke?”
“Yeah, casually, mostly just with Felix or at parties and shit like that.” 
“I didn’t know. Do you have a favorite strain? I have just about everything.” He falls into silent thought as you take your seat next to him, setting the box in your arms on the table and starting to set up.
“Purple Runtz, I think. I smoked that one before a cam once and I felt ten times more sensitive.” He sits up, leaning forward to watch as you open your box which basically serves as a mini dispensary. Your interest in weed goes way beyond just getting high for the fuck of it. It’s been the best remedy for your anxiety since you tried it but then again you don’t owe anyone an explanation on why you always have a blunt rolled and ready. 
“Ou, I love that one, I think I have some of that. My favorite is Apollo 11, it makes me feel so relaxed and fucking brainless. My anxiety evaporates as soon as I hit it.”
“Are you anxious tonight?” You don’t look over at him. You simply grin as you continue to search for your favorite pipe. You actually aren’t too nervous about tonight's show, something about having Hyunjin here is grounding.
“Not really but I still wanna take a hit or two.” He nods, reaching for the pipe that you laid out on your coffee table. 
“How the hell did you get your pipe so clean?” You giggle as you finally find the strains you both mentioned earlier and take a bit out for the both of you.
“That’s a secret, your majesty.” You erupt into your second fit of laughter for the night when you look over and get a glimpse of the most wicked side eye you’ve ever seen. 
“Fuck you.”
“You will soon.” You pick out your favorite grinder and close your box. “Want anything else?”
“Got any soju?” You pause, turning around slowly to face him with a raised brow.
“You want to get cross faded?” 
“Not really, I don’t drink much just up to the first line of a solo cup. That’s more of my thing than smoking, really.” He shrugs, placing your pipe back down onto the table.
“I mean, if you think that you can handle it. I do want you to remember the night, you know?” 
“I’m not a teenager, I can handle it. I’ve done it before and it’s not like I’m smoking an entire blunt by myself.” You proceed grinding the buds as he stands from your couch. 
“Your kitchen is…” He walks towards the archway of your living room and mumbles a small ‘there’ when he spots the dark kitchen right across the narrow hallway.
“Soju is on the top shelf of the cabinet next to the fridge.” You call out as you start to fill the bowl of your purple glass pipe. 
“So high up for such a little person.” He calls back as you hear the cabinet close.
“Solo cups are on top of the fridge and fuck off tall person.” You can hear the faint echo of his chuckle as he fixes his drink. You take the couple of seconds that you’re waiting for him as an opportunity to light the bowl and take the first hit. 
“A yellow solo? Really? You know that the red solo cups are the sexy ones.” You stifle a chuckle in a desperate attempt not to choke on the smoke in your lungs. He brings the cup to his lips quickly before taking the pipe that you're offering him.
“Sexy?” You question following your exhale. “What makes the red ones sexy?”
“The sense of mystery.” He mumbles as he exhales over his shoulder. “I just never see the yellow ones.” You hum, taking the pipe back and peaking into his cup.
“Hyunjin, that’s way more than just the bottom of the cup.” The corner of his mouth twitches as he offers you the cup.
“That’s because I got just a bit more to share with you.” 
“I didn’t say that I wanted any.” You tease.
“True, you don’t have to have any. Just thought of you since I came to your house and started drinking your liquor.” You set your pipe down and take the cup from Hyunjin’s hand silently before turning to him completely and holding your pinky out. 
“I’ll have some but I just need us to promise something first.” He turns to face you completely, glancing down at your finger with a faint grin. “I get high before almost every cam and I know that you’re aware of that but I’ve never really done it with anyone else. Well, not on cam. I just want us to be comfortable.”
He holds his pinky out to you, wrapping it around yours without question. “I promise that I’ll be fine and that I’m more than okay with everything that will happen tonight. If I’m uncomfortable I’ll tell you, you’ll do the same, right? I only want to make you feel good, nothing else.” 
“I promise that I’ll be fine too. I’ll tell you everything. I’ll communicate so much that you’ll want me to shut up.” The two of you had already discussed your limits beforehand and you’ve both done your research on the other person - whether it be for business or personal benefits varies - but you feel yourself relax further now that you’ve heard him say that he’ll be fine. Pinky promises are like a contract after all. 
“Impossible, I could never want such a thing.” You let go of his finger and he follows, a grin on both of your faces as he reaches for his cup but you beat him to it. “We’re sharing the bowl and the drink anyway, It’ll literally just be the tip of the iceberg.” He’s right, this isn’t enough to fuck you guys up, not with the tolerance that you have. It’s just enough to make you both melt and feel loose enough to drop your masks a little faster.
“You know what we should do?” He takes the cup as you pass it to him, drinking from the same spot on the cusp that you just did. Did he mean to do that? Was that like an indirect kiss? Or are you really that down bad for him already? Fuck, get a grip. “We should start a bit early, maybe just sit and talk to set the mood?”
“You can’t smoke on cam though.” He takes another sip as you finish your second hit. 
“Let’s start after the bowl then. We can share the drink and just chill? Get a feel of everything and vibe check the chat.” He hums, choking a bit on his inhale but recovering pretty quickly, he must do this more frequently than you thought. He clears his throat taking a sip of soju to substitute one burn for another. 
“That’s fine with me, Princess.”
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“You never told me if I look okay.” The two of you finished smoking maybe fifteen minutes ago and decided to move to your office to start getting comfortable on set. 
“That’s because I didn’t trust myself to say something that didn’t sound lame.” Hyunjin makes himself comfortable on your sofa bed, yellow solo cup in hand while he pushes his hair out of his face.
“That was then, what about now?”
“Now I can confidently say that you look absolutely breath-taking.” The soft sound of R&B music playing across the room fills in the silence after his answer. Your content giggling and smiling while you set up your camera and adjust your laptop is enough feedback for him.  “What’s the second cam for?”
“Oh, collabs aren’t available in my archive to try and encourage more people to watch them. So if anyone misses this they’re assed out but I do like to record collabs for myself to watch back later.” 
“Yeah? Gonna get off to me fucking you later?” The weed and soju are definitely doing their job for him. His playful and teasing nature has been on full display since the two of you finished smoking. Your mask is dropped too so you have no problem matching his energy.
“Maybe, better put on an unforgettable show.” He tongues his cheek, eyeing your glossed lips. He can’t wait to smear that red tint across your cheeks, he’ll definitely give you an unforgettable show. You settle next to him, draping your bare legs over his clothed lap.
“You’ve seen my cams.” His eyes meet yours slowly. “So you know that I will.”
“Then let’s do this.” You lean forward to hit ‘Go Live’ but Hyunjin stops you before you can press it. 
“Hold on, I wanted to do something first.” He takes your hand gently as he leans forward to sit the yellow cup on the table in front of the both of you. You hum, staring at him with pinched brows but when he pushes your hair from your face and runs his thumb over your cheek bone you can’t help but to let go of the tension in your face. 
“I don’t really want our first kiss to be on cam, if you don’t mind.” A grin creeps up on you as he searches your eyes, leaning in so closely that you can feel his breath tickling your lips. 
 “Can I kiss you?” You answer him by leaning in and pressing your lips against his. He sighs into you as his lips move against yours. Soft, gentle and only for you. His other hand finds your waist and he pulls you closer to him until your racing heart is nearly against his own. You let out a soft moan as you feel his tongue trace the seam of your mouth. Once he hears that sweet sound he knows that he has to pull away or else the two of you will never turn that camera on and he’ll keep every inch of you to himself. You notice his reluctance as he pulls away but the look in his eyes once they flutter open and meet yours makes you forget about everything except the feeling of him against you. 
“You’re smiling.” You turn away at his comment trying to hide your face from him but he turns your head back, a matching smile on his lips. 
“You kissed me, of course I’m smiling.”
“Does that mean that you like me?” You turn away from him, groaning playfully as you avoid his gaze. 
“Are you ready now? Or are you going to keep flirting with me?” His chuckle brings back the smile that you’re fighting to get rid of and it excites the butterflies in your stomach all over again. Luckily for you Hyunjin is just as down bad as you are, his stomach is doing somersaults right now and he swears that his heart is beating out of his chest. 
“I’m ready.”
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The chat went from being chill with just about ninety people watching to absolutely overflowing as soon as your usual air time hit. You’re used to having a large audience but the number on your screen is nearly more than double what it usually is thanks to your special guest. 
Jinnie! You dyed your hair. They look so hot together omg I’d do anything to be between the two of them right now Can he handle our Princess?
You and Hyunjin skim through the buzzing chat, responding to the comments that catch your eye. 
“So many comments about my hair. I just did it because I wanted to impress you all, did it work?” He winks at the camera, his signature smirk on his lips as he brings the cup up to take a sip. He tilts the cup towards you once he sips from it but you bring your hand up to play in his hair instead. 
“It’s so soft, like, you all would not believe it. I really like the black on him, don’t you?” His eyes meet yours as he licks his lips. 
“Are you impressed?” It’s your turn to smirk as you take the cup from him, brushing your fingertips over the back of his hand in the process.
“Let’s save the reviews for after the show.” You offer a quick wink as you sip from the cup. He tongues his cheek as he focuses back on the chat but his hands are only focused on you.
His fingers are having a field day as they trace sensitive circles and lines into your calves and thighs. He kneads at the flesh softly as he makes conversation with the viewers that he recognizes, but you can’t seem to focus on chat right now. Not when your crushes' big hands are massaging every inch of exposed skin he can reach.
Hyunjin notices that you’re a bit spaced out, so he asks you a question to help you refocus. The conversation kind of turns into an impromptu story time that consists of you and Hyunjin telling the viewers and each other about the other collabs that you’ve done. The further that you get into the show, the closer you and Hyunjin get. You’ve gone from just having your calves draped over his lap to moving closer and putting your arm over his shoulder. That has led you to how you are right now, his arm around your waist with your legs draped over his lap and your head on his shoulder. Your breath is tickling that sweet spot on his neck, and he’s trying desperately to focus on the timbre of your laugh instead of how eager he is to touch you. You’re laughing about something that probably isn’t that funny - thanks to the weed - when Hyunjin reads a comment out loud. 
“Looks like you got a tip and a request.” He leans a bit closer to the screen, pushing his hair out of his face and licking his lips as he reads the request to you. “Your socks are cute but I want to see your pretty toes.”
“Mm would you take them off for me, Jinnie?” He sighs at the way that you make his name sound so sweet yet sexy at the same time. He’s already rock hard in his sweats from how close you are to him, he can’t possibly handle your pretty voice saying his name like that too
“Ask me again.” Actually, he can take it. He’ll definitely explode later but right now he wants to take all that he can get. “You sounded so sweet the first time I just need to hear it again.”
“What if I'm not sweet this time?” 
“Indulge me, Princess.” A mindless giggle escapes you as you lean in and run your fingers through his hair. You stop right when your lips brush the shell of his ear and whisper. 
“Will you please take them off for me…” You suck in a slow breath and Hyunjin’s eyes flutter shut for just a second. “Your majesty .” His eyes squeeze shut and he folds forward in a fit of laughter that you quickly reciprocate.
“You’re so fucking stupid.” He sits up, trying to catch his breath the best he can so that he can fulfill your request.
“Then you should have no problem fucking me dumb.” You fake a pout at him through your laughter.
 “Come here.” You bend your knees, bringing your feet to his lap to give him better access. Your laughter quickly dies down when you get a feel of his hard cock under the soles of your feet. It would be a shame not to help him with that. As Hyunjin removes one of your socks you press the ball of your naked foot against his clothed shaft lightly, just enough for a delicious hiss to escape him. 
He moves to remove your other sock and you repeat your previous actions, pressing against his hard cock with the other foot and then following with both. Hyunjin's hands run over the tops of your feet as he watches you massage his dick over his pants. It’s too subtle for your mic to catch but you can hear his breathing start to pick up as you work against him. “Pretty.”  He mumbles, his voice thick with desire. You grin at him lazily, the effects of both strains of weed is starting to hit you a bit harder now that the heat between you and Hyunjin is starting to pick up. 
“You think my toes are pretty?”  He nods, his eyes darkened with lust. One of his hands runs up your calf, his grip gentle but firm. You arch your back, pushing your hips forward and inviting him closer while he leans in, bringing one of your feet up to his mouth with a feather light grip on your ankle and pressing a soft kiss to the top of your foot. A shiver runs down your spine as you watch him. 
“So pretty.” His voice is barely above a whisper, just loud enough for your mic to pick up but quiet enough to know that he’s talking to you and only you. It’s like he’s forgotten about the chat and if he is to be completely honest, he did, just for a moment. The feeling of your foot pressed against his dick is so intoxicating, how could he not? “Can I suck them?”
“I’ve never done that before.” The wide nervous smile and breathy chuckle that follows your confession leaves Hyunjin smiling too. He presses another kiss to the top of your foot, this time it’s sloppier and it sends another chill down your spine, are you into this?
“Do you want to try it?” You’ve never felt shy when doing a cam before. Not even when you first started, so why are you covering your eyes and giggling like a drunk teenager at the mention of having your toes sucked? “Aren’t these feet just too pretty, chat? Shouldn’t they be worshiped appropriately?”
I’d give anything to be Princess right now Such pretty feet need to be praised
Hyunjin’s question received more than a few comments back and nearly double the amount of tips but truthfully, you were already sold the minute that he asked to do it. Who in their right mind would say no to having those beautiful blushed lips on them? 
“I’ll try it.” Your bright eyes meet Hyunjin’s for just a second as he silently asks for confirmation. You nod your head, a goofy smile on your face as you lean back on your palms. He presses soft sloppy kisses to the top of your foot, adding more pressure and tongue as he trails down. His eyes stay on yours when he kisses your pinky toe, adding so much tongue that he’s practically licking it into his mouth. Your smile drops as he does the same to the next toe, you watch with parted lips and bated breath as he sucks on the digit, swirling his tongue over your purple pedicure and effectively making you gush between your thighs.
“Why the fuck does that feel so good?” Your question comes out as more of a quivering moan than you meant for it to but you’re way too entranced in this pleasure to give a fuck about how you sound. 
He smirks, his eyes twinkling with a soft desire to unravel you further. “Because I'm good at it.” His lips and tongue leave a trail of wet heat as he continues, his slow and deliberate movements build you up perfectly. 
Something tells you that this is going to be a good show. 
You can't help but let out a sharp gasp as his lips close around your big toe. Why is that one ten times more sensitive? “Oh fuck.” Your eyes flutter shut and you throw your head back with your lips parted in a euphoric smile. You puff out a small sigh of relief followed by a mindless giggle as he continues to lavish attention on your toes. “This is my new favorite thing.”
“Having your toes sucked?” He plants a sloppy kiss on the top of your foot as he lowers it back to his lap. “Or having me suck them?” He moves his hands to your thighs and parts your legs he sinks the tips of his fingers into your thigh as he pulls you forward into his lap. You gasp at the sudden shift, trying your best to stifle a giggle.
“You can answer that when it’s just you and me if you want.” His hands move to grab at the curve of your ass and you smile down at him, we can’t let him have all of the fun can we? 
The moan that escapes Hyunjin when you wrap your hand around his throat and pull his face towards yours is enough to make your ego explode. It’s only now that he’s so close to you that you can see how his eyes have a faint red tint from the weed, they’re droopy and have the tiniest fucked out glaze to them as they stare back into yours. 
“You sure are talking a lot for someone who needs me on their cock.” You swirl your hips against him, pressing your soaked core against the tent in his pants. You can’t help to resent the clothes keeping you away from each other, you much rather be grinding on his bare length right now. “Shouldn’t you be begging for me instead?”
"Make me beg for it." His words huff out in a shaky breath, his large hands swiftly and mindlessly gripping your plush hips as you grind against him slowly. 
"Show me how much you want it." He attempts to lean forward and catch your lips with his but you dodge him a bit before he can reach you. “Use your words, baby.”
The second that you call him baby Hyunjin swears that he could melt in your hands. He’s no stranger to the sweet name but hearing it fall from your lips makes every other time someone has called him that feel bitter. “You’re gonna drive me crazy.”
You halt all movement and he whines in protest. He attempts to buck up into you but you press down to stop him. “Let me hear you beg for me.”
 “Please let me kiss you, let me taste you.” His pleading voice is barely above a whisper. He takes a deep breath and closes his eyes, his pounding heart is all that he hears as he awaits your response. Your hand slides up the back of his neck, lacing through his raven locks and pulling lightly. “Please, I need you.”
“You sound so pretty.”  You lean in and kiss him, smiling against him as he cups your face with both hands and deepens the kiss. His lips move over yours with a hunger that you’ve never experienced before.
 His rhythm is gentle yet desperate like he’s savoring the taste of you. Your hands run over his strong shoulders and trail down to explore each curve of his bicep. You brush your fingers over the muscles, moaning when you feel them flex beneath your fingertips, the simple reaction prompts you to grind into him a bit harder earning a pleased groan to vibrate through him. Your hands are caressing the smooth skin of his forearms when his tongue swipes across the seam of your mouth and you promptly grant him access.
 Your hands fall to rest on his chest, balling the fabric of his shirt into a fist and your brain blanks out, there’s not a single thought going through that pretty head once the taste of him floods your tongue. He tastes more like Soju than he does weed and there’s a hint of mint from the gum that he was chewing beforehand.
“Chat…” Hyunjin pulls back, his eyes stay on you while he talks to the audience that you completely forgot about. Forgetting that you’re live with hundreds of people watching seems to be a running theme tonight. “You think I should take her top off?” His eyes trail down the curve of your neck until they reach the hem of your strapless top that’s leaving very little to the imagination.
“It’s so tiny how the fuck does it stay on?” You laugh a bit harder than intended at his question causing your top to slip down a bit. “Oh, fuck can you do me a favor? Bounce in my lap, I wanna see your top fall down.”
“You want me to bounce in your lap?” You coo with a sweet yet teasing tone. “Like this?” You bounce lightly, grinding down on his pulsing erection each time you come down.
“Shit, baby, please.” You continue to bounce in his lap lightly, feeling your top slip down little by little. 
“Is this how you want me to ride you, Jinnie?” You bat your lashes at him, his hands find a home on your waist, digging his fingers into the flesh. 
“Such a fucking tease.” The smile on his face quickly dissolves once your top finally gives way, you continue to grind against him slowly as he takes in the sight. “ Gosh, you’re gorgeous.” 
One of his hands slides up the curve of your waist and cups at your bare breast, kneading the mound slowly while pinching and twirling your nipple. It doesn’t take long for his other hand to follow suit. “Shit, they’re sensitive.” You moan at the contact, whining a bit when he pinches harder.
“Yeah? Can you cum from this, Princess? Gonna soak my lap from getting your nipples pinched?” You whimper, arousal flooding your - already ruined - shorts as you arch into his touch. “ Her shorts should come off next, shouldn’t they, chat?”
“Nuh uh, Your shirt is next.” 
“Can’t wait to get me naked, huh?” He reluctantly moves his hands to the hem of his shirt, pulling it off in one swift motion and revealing his beautifully built body to you. Hyunjin doesn’t usually get completely naked for his cams, eighty percent of the time he’ll keep his shirt on or just pull down his jeans enough to free his cock but he agreed to do it with you when the two of you were talking about your limits. “Happy?”
“Very.” You mindlessly run your hand over his chest, taking in every bit of him. You’re interrupted by the warm feeling of his hands snaking up your thighs and messing with the hem of your shorts. He taps your outer thigh twice, his bottom lip is pulled between his teeth as he waits for you to follow his silent command. “Can't wait to get me naked, huh?”
You mimic his previous statement and he offers a dark and airy chuckle in return. The banter between you two is not helping how hard he is right now. He’s always liked that about you, he likes that you always have something to say back. “Damn right.” 
You hook your thumbs into the waistband of your shorts, keeping steady eye contact with Hyunjin as you remove them. He moans at the sight of you bare before him, the previous petting your thighs has turned into him digging into the soft flesh in an attempt to control himself. “No panties, Princess?”
“They’d just get ruined.” You grab at the hem of his sweats, fumbling with the drawstring and trying to not make your desperation too obvious. Once you undo the bow he helps you pull his pants off of his hips only to find him bare underneath. “No underwear, Jinnie?” He smiles, chuckling a bit with a shrug.
“You’d just rip them off of me anyway.” You laugh loud, hitting his arm and throwing his sweats to the side. 
“I would not!” Hyunjin follows up with a joke that you only half laugh at, you’re way too busy taking in the sight of his dripping cock resting against his toned abdomen, how is this man even real? Hyunjin catches on shortly after, taking a chance to enjoy the flawless view of you.
His cock jumps once his eyes land on your glistening core, wet and ready for him to ruin, he has half a mind to just turn off the camera and carry you to your bedroom where he can enjoy you without the prying eyes of your viewers who you both forgot about the second that you got undressed, or maybe it was sometime before that, when was the last time that you looked at the chat? A familiar text tone pulls you out of your thoughts and hurls you back into reality. This is a cam show. 
You don’t even need to look at your phone to know who texted you. You’ve got Felix’s text tone memorized. He attends every one of your shows and watches the chat to make sure that no one gets out of hand and you do the same for him when he goes live. Tonight he’s accompanied by Hyunjin’s stream mod and roommate Changbin.
 You assume that Felix texted you to tell you just what you were thinking a second ago, you need to look at the chat. You force your attention over to your laptop screen, trying your best to focus on the comments and tips flooding in left and right. 
“Jin is distracting me from the chat.” You tease, leaning in to read some comments.
They are in their own world Princess is going to ruin him I want him to look at at me like that
“You’re distracting me too.” He pulls you towards him by your hips so that you're straddling him with his cock pressed against your core. “Are you guys enjoying the show so far?” He asks after you send him a playful glare.
The chat lights up with comments and requests. Hyunjin knows that he should pick a request to entertain the audience. He knows that some people want to see him do specific things to you and you to him but he can’t help but to feel a bit selfish right now. He’s been dreaming about being this close to you for weeks. He doesn’t want to spend his time doing things that others request. He wants to savor you. 
“I know I’m enjoying it.” You turn your attention back to Hyunjin, your eyes run over his features, taking in his soft lips and his shining droopy eye. He licks over his bottom lip as he looks you over too. Your eyes are barely drooping despite being high, your lips are kiss bitten and barely glossed but the red tint is still visible and it’s smudged onto your cheek ever so slightly. Just what he wanted.
“I’m sorry…” Hyunjin mumbles as he switches focus between your lips and your lust glazed eyes. “I’m sorry, I can’t pay attention to chat right now.” His lips are on yours in an instant, punctuating his sentence with a heated kiss. You gasp at the sudden impact, your heart racing as your tongue tangles with his. Hyunjin pulls away for just a second, his breath hot against your skin as he whispers, “Can I fuck you now, baby? Can I fuck you like nobody’s watching.”
“You wanna play with me, Jinnie?” You whisper back as your arms wind around his neck.
“Until you break.” He dives back in, moving one of his hands to cradle the back of your head as he tastes you. You pull him closer until your chest is flush with his and you can feel the vibration of your shared moans rattling between you. You reach between your bodies with whatever space is left, lifting yourself up just enough to position him without breaking the kiss. He groans once he feels the head of his cock brush against your dripping slit, he breaks the kiss and leans back to take in the sight of his cock stretching your cunt. “That cunt is so fucking sloppy.” His eyes roll back as you sink down on him and he drinks in every second of your cunt swallowing each thick inch of his throbbing length. 
“O-oh, fuck.” He closes the gap between the two of you again with his hands on your hips to help guide you down. He leans his forehead against yours, gazing into your eyes as he fills you to the brim. Once you take him to the hilt you pause to catch your breath but Hyunjin has other plans. You cry out when you feel the tip of his dick kiss your cervix just right. The stretch of him is unlike anything - or anyone - you’ve ever felt before. 
“Tiny fucking cunt taking my cock so well. ‘S fucking made for me isn’t it, Princess? This cunt was made for me to fuck.” You move in tandem, timing when to swirl your hips so that he feels impossibly deep. You know that Hyunjin is the type to talk dirty during sex, you’ve watched enough of his cams to imagine what he might be like. You’re usually no different but the way that he feels inside of you is so dizzying that you might not be able to keep up with him tonight. The sweet buzz of the weed and soju makes everything feel like it could have you floating at any second. Even just trying to remember his name or your own for that matter is a full time job that your brain keeps clocking out of.
“J-just for you baby… god, this pussy is yours just please don’t stop.” Your fucked out eyes stare into his as you start to take more control, the sound of your skin colliding echoes as you bounce in his lap. His hands stay on your hips, periodically squeezing the flesh when you clench around him just right. Sweet whines and chants of ‘ah ah ah’ fall from your lips but you become muted when Hyunjin sucks your bottom lip into his mouth and lightly bites it. He plants broken kisses as you arch into his hand tracing the length of your spine. He had to get you to be quiet, if you keep moaning like that this show won’t last very long. 
“You know I could have you however I want, right?” He groans as he practically melts beneath you. “I could pick you up and ruin this pretty cunt but I want you to use me. I want you to use my cock in front of all of them.” His hands fall from your back and settle on your ass. The soft flesh in his hands has him holding on for dear life. What the hell are you doing to him? He’s never felt this good before. He needs you off of him now or else he’s going to explode.
 “Fuck, baby.” He lands a firm smack that draws a whimper from you. “Come here, show that pretty ass to the camera.” He lifts you up mid stroke and turns you around, your ass and dripping hole on display for more than a hundred people to see. The thought of it makes you bite your lip as Hyunjin reaches over you to jiggle your ass for the camera, leaving a bruising slap on either cheek as he pleases.
“Beautiful isn’t she?” He spreads your cheeks and leans over with puckered lips. Letting a stream of spit fall from between them and onto your asshole. He watches as it runs down and mixes with the sticky arousal of your pussy then drips down to pool on the sofa. A curse escapes him when he brings a finger up to tease your tight hole, rimming it gently then trailing down to tease your fluttering pussy. 
“Jin.” A mindless whimper escapes you and Hyunjin hums a  moan in response. He wants nothing more than to taste you, he’d make you cum while he plays with both of your holes but he wants to take his time with that. He can’t give you rushed head, you deserve better than that so he’ll settle for sinking his finger into your pussy with his thumb rubbing at your pretty puckered hole. “Oh my god.”
“Think I should add another finger chat?” Tips flood in as soon as the question leaves his mouth. You wiggle your ass at the camera earning a chuckle and a light ass slap from Hyunjin. “My eager princess, want another?” You nod, drawing out an excited hum that promptly fades into a moan once his middle finger slips into you. He fucks into you, pressing against your walls and sending a jolt of pleasure through your body. His other hand trails up your back and you arch for him, pushing your ass into his hand. Your moans echo through the room like a porn site on loud speaker.  
“Jinnie I'm gonna - gonna -” He slaps your ass, sending you into a broken moan. 
“Go ahead and make a mess for me, baby.” You’re coming undone before you can process it. He fucks you through it, massaging your sweet spot and drawing out your climax. You collapse onto his lap, eyes closed as you try to catch your breath. “I’m the luckiest guy alive.” A smug smirk pulls at Hyunjin’s lips as he repeats the comment that he was able to catch before it went zooming by in the messy chat.
 Your eyes flutter open with the intention of looking up at him and throwing a smart remark his way but his throbbing cock resting against his stomach is too close for you not to pay attention to. Hyunjin is running his fingers through your hair as he’s still trying to read the chat. He’s so engrossed in that that he only half notices when you move closer to his cock, sliding it into your mouth with a content hum
“Oh baby, oh fuck” His hand rests on the back of your head, instinctively guiding you as you take all of him and allow his tip to abuse the back of your throat. He marvels at the stretch of your pretty lips around him, taking every single inch of him until his tip makes your throat bulge and your mouth water. “Please don’t stop, don’t stop.” He pants above you, his eyes are glued to your watering ones as you blink up at him and bat your thick lashes. You swallow around him with each bob of your head and use your free hand to pay attention to his balls. You massage them gently, covering them with the spit that dribbles down from the hilt of Hyunjin's cock.
“You have no idea how good you are at that. You have no fucking clue, do you? I’d give you anything, I’d do anything just to feel this pretty mouth on me all of the time. Holy shit, Princess.” You choke around him when he pushes your head down a bit, holding you there for a second to indulge in the way your throat squeezes him. A tear rolls down your cheek and Hyunjin wipes it away with his thumb. He brings the finger up to his mouth and sucks it clean, keeping his eyes on yours as he swirls his tongue around the digit. You whimper around him and he throws his head back at the sensation. “You’re gonna make me nut if you don’t stop. I don’t wanna bust in your mouth, I wanna fill your pussy.”
He makes a fist around your ponytail when you don’t stop, pulling your head back with a grunt. “Don’t fucking listen.” You offer him a messy smile, sticking your tongue out in an attempt to catch his dick in your mouth again. He takes the base of his dick between his fingers and slaps the tip on your tongue. “Filthy girl, so pretty. Look at me, Mhmm keep those eyes on me, fuck you’re unbelievable.” He groans, pushing into your mouth and moving his hips in slow circles. You gag slightly as he pushes deep, his grip around your ponytail tightening as he fucks your face. 
“You’re gonna drive me insane.” He pulls your head back again, a single string of spit keeps the two of you connected but it’s broken when he turns your head to the camera. “You liked being dirty for me in front of them? You see how many people are watching you suck my cock.” Arousal gushes between your thighs and you press them together as the intoxicating feeling of embarrassment creeps up and paints a blush over your cheeks.
“I love it.” You hum and he smiles down at you sliding his thumb into your mouth “You’re a dream.” You smile around his finger, swirling your tongue around the tip then releasing it with a faint pop.
 “Wanna lay down for me? Let me fuck you dumb?” You’re pulling yourself into position before he even finishes the question. The sudden urgency in your actions earns you a faint chuckle and a quick kiss to your forehead as you get comfortable. He gets up on his knees and slots himself between your legs. You bring them up to rest on his shoulders and he plants sloppy kisses along your calf while he strokes himself against your entrance, teasing your clit with his tip. 
“How ya feeling, Princess. You got a bit quiet on me earlier.” 
“I’m literally seeing stars.” Your loud laughs echo through the room and rumble through the mic in front of you. “I’m good, just on cloud nine.”
“Am I your favorite collab?” The answer is yes but you’ll never admit that to him, especially not while you’re live. Truthfully this barely even feels like a collab. It just feels like you and your boyfriend fucking in front of a camera. Wait, boyfriend…? What are you even thinking? Are you catching more feelings for him right now? Ugh, okay, you gotta sort that out later. 
“Are you trying to get me in trouble?” You lightly push his chest with your foot before resting it back over his shoulder. He chuckles and kisses the inside of your ankle. “Just fuck me.” 
“My pleasure, this is what we’re gonna do. I’m gonna slip into this pussy nice and slow.” He runs his pointer finger between your slick folds and your back slightly arches off of the mattress. “Then you’re gonna cross your ankles over my chest and I'm gonna hold them.”
“Is this supposed to be some type of forbidden position?” He rolls his eyes, laughing at you as you smile up at him. “It’s gonna make that tiny cunt of yours feel even tighter.” 
You take a shaky breath in as he starts sinking into you. It feels like there can’t possibly be enough air in your lungs. They’re burning but you willfully ignore it. “Oh, come on baby, this messy cunt takes me so well.” His voice is thick with aroused exasperation as he fills you. He halts his movement for a second to allow you to adjust. “Breathe for me.”
You suck in a slow breath but that’s all in vain when he starts rocking into you. “Hyunjin” Your eyes roll back as you moan his name repeatedly. It’s amazing how perfect he feels, like he was made specifically to be inside of you.
 “Cross your legs, baby.” You do as you’re told, moving slowly as you adjust to his languid strokes “That’s it.” His gentle pace only lasts another second or two before he starts getting more reckless. He brings his hand up to his mouth and bites on his bent finger while your mouth hangs open in a silent scream. 
“Oh what the fuck, Jin. What the fuck.” The moan that escapes you is desperate and nearly has a primal ring to it. The pressure on your clit for your legs being crossed mixed with him feeling as deep as he does is a recipe to blinding orgasm. 
“You’re so fucking - Oh my god, you’re the only person I ever wanna fuck. This cunt is mine, can it be mine Princess?” He settles into an unrelenting tempo, he grips your thighs with both hands to steady himself while his desperation sets in. “Tell me it’s mine please, please please.”
“Y-yours, all yours, fuck me like I’m all yours.” A deep groan rumbles through him, That’s exactly what he wanted to hear. He wants to be yours and he wants you to be his. He wants to be the only one who gets to feel like this. The only one who makes you cream on their cock. You look so pretty, you sound so pretty, fuck you’re so pretty. 
You turn your face towards the camera so that they can get a better look at you, eyes crossed and drooling onto the sofa.
“My brainless baby is drooling?” A broken moan interrupts him.  “My cock really got you fucking dumb, huh?” 
“I wan’ your cum, Jinnie, please. Need it. Need it inside.”
“You want it? Baby’s gonna milk my cock, huh? Gonna make me creampie that cunt. Shit - I’m close.” You clench around him and he swears that he can feel his soul leaving his body. He pushes all the way in, hitting spots that you could never reach alone. Your orgasm comes into sight when he hits your cervix just right. “You gonna take it, baby? Gonna take all my - fuck, I’m gonna cum.”
 “Don’t.” He groans, slowing down a bit but you whimper in protest. “Keep fucking me like that, p-please please. Deep like that, you’re so deep like that, fuck - please.”
“Pri-princess, I can’t - fuck, I can’t”  He whines and buries himself deep into you, hips stuttering as he gets closer and closer to losing control. 
“Don’t you d-dare cum, Jinnie. Don’t.” You press your thighs together in a desperate attempt at reigning in your orgasm. The pleasure build inside you, slowly creeping up your spine before it hits you all at once. Your body tenses as shockwaves rush over you and your walls spasm and contract around him.
“Holy shit, baby I can’t fucking take it.” His movements become erratic as he tries to help you ride out your high but the feeling of you flooding his cock throws him over the edge. His orgasm hits him like a freight train and he throws his head back and practically screams above you. He bites his lip in a desperate attempt to quiet himself but his efforts are not enough to keep his moans of euphoria at bay.
 He empties himself inside of you until his seed is spilling out in a helpless attempt to escape your plugged pussy. You uncross your legs from his chest and let them plop against the sofa once he releases his death grip on your thighs. With the lack of support Hyunjin falls forward but he catches himself before he collapses on top of you, his hips shake as he comes down from his high. Sweat drips down and runs along the valley of your breasts as he hovers above you and tries to catch his breath. You stay still, your body still trembling as the aftershocks of pleasure course through you. You stay like that until he finally pulls himself out and collapses next to you. 
Only your labored breaths can be heard throughout the room as you try to fill your lungs but that’s easily drowned out by the sounds of your hammering heart pulsing in your ears when you feel Hyunjin move next to you. 
He’s holding your hand.
His fingers intertwine with yours, giving you a light squeeze and you smile at the gesture, the butterflies in your stomach erupt into a clumsy swarm as the two of you lie in silence for a while longer.. 
“So.” Hyunjin breaths out, propping himself up onto his elbow so that he can look down at you. “Are you impressed?” You push him down with a laugh and roll over on top of him.
“I am impressed.” You lean down and catch his smiling lips in a slow and soft kiss. You both sigh into it, his hands tracing up your sides as yours run down his chest. You break the kiss with a smile and whisper. “Your majesty.”
“If you’re the Princess what does that make me?” Hyunjin teases with a smile and you stare down at him with a surprised blush. You attempt to hide your face in his neck and roll off of him but he pulls you in for another kiss before you can make your escape. The two of you melt into the exchange, getting so lost in each other that you don’t hear Felix’s text tone going off. Actually, you haven’t heard it go off for the past ten minutes that he’s been texting you. Changbin has been texting Hyunjin for the same amount of time if not a bit longer but the two of you have been so deep in your own world. Right now nothing and no one but the two of you exist. You’re both completely and totally enamored with each other and you have no problem with everyone knowing that…Except no one will know that. Why?
Because the livestream disconnected twenty minutes ago.
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Thank you reading! Please like and share, it makes my day!
ASLO, please follow my back-up acct. @minniee-verse ❣️
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lovelytsunoda · 2 months ago
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who is that diva? | liam lawson
summary: the internet is set ablaze after a race car driver and a bookstagrammer are caught in a heated battle fro the last lego set on black friday. is this a lawsuit waiting to happen or a meet-cute worthy of its own book?
pairing: liam lawson x bookstagrammer!reader
warnings: implications of a physical fight, they're both a lil' unhinged
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chamomilekissedpages just posted to her story!
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chamomilekissedpages just posted to her story!
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chamomilekissedpages just posted!
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liked by liamlawson, yourbestie and 1,000 others
chamomilekissedpages november so far!
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user now i know thats not a picture of the man she stomped on to get her lego set-
-> user RIGHT?? as soon as it came out that he was famous i expected a lawsuit ngl
yourbestie i had such a great time with you guys last night! if you ask me, he's a total keeper <3
user girl i love those shoes!
-> chamomilekissedpages i don't gatekeep! just dm'd you a link to my guy, he'll give you a good price :)
liamlawson you still owe me a lego set. just so everybody is aware.
-> chamomilekissedpages you and what army?
-> yukitsunoda this one!!!!
-> oscarpiastri yeah!
liamlawson and chamomilekissedpages just posted!
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liked by oscapiastri, yukitsunoda and 3,476 others
liamlawson i didn't get the lego set, but i did win the heart of someone who won't share her toys with me
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oscarpiastri i wondered how long it would take him to break
-> liamlawson fuck offffff
-> chamomilekissedpages guys come on, he made it three weeks!
user of all the ways i expected legogate to end, this was not it!
chamomilekissedpages would buying you a lego formula e car make things better?
-> liamlawson oh my god baby is it too soon to say that i'm head over heels in love with you?
yourbestie congratulations to you both! your 'most insufferable couple of the season' award is in the mail
-> chamomilekissedpages you call us insufferable but we know you love us
-> yourbestie damn fucking right i do
-> liamlawson careful the fia might fine me for having cuss words in my comment section
-> chamomilekissedpages he says as if he didnt just tell oscar to fuck right off
Interview with Liam Lawson in the Las Vegas GP Paddock!
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BONUS: TEXTS BETWEEN LIAM AND Y/N
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ningvory · 3 months ago
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SCREAM - jang wonyoung
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1,740 words // yall i wanted to do kinktober sooo baddd but im so outta ideas and school and work has been draining😔 so instead i'll just write 2-3 more halloween themed fics
CW: noncon -> dubcon, ghostface!wonyoung, big dick wony, bully!reader, a little knife play, choking, backshots, doggy, missionary, a little tit play, mentions of reader getting impregnated, squirting, not proofread lolz
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its about 11pm on a friday, 'means girls' is playing on your living room tv while you were in the kitchen searching for a pot to put your noodles in. your parents left for their business trip to wherever, you weren't really paying attention after they mentioned you'll be alone for two weeks and that you had a spending allowance of 5k, which is why you were wearing your new black lingerie set under your fuzzy pink robe.
you were humming a song as you head to the pantry to get a bottle of water to fill the pot with until you heard your phone ringtone go off. you went to mute the tv and grabbed your phone, tapping the answer button. you held the phone up to your ear but you're met with silence.
"hello?~" you questioned, dragging out the word. it was a habit of yours when you were annoyed,
"didn't think you'd pick up." the voice was cheerful, too cheerful to the point where it had you furrow your eyebrows trying figure out who's calling you at this time.
"well, i did. so.." you responded with a little bit of attitude. you were starving and here this stranger is playing on your phone. "listen, who the hell are you and what do you want?" you raise your voice a octave.
"your tits look good in that bra, wish i can see the way your ass looks in the panties." you furrow your eyebrows once more. every window was locked and your curtains blocked any prying eyes from seeing inside.
"um—you must've gotten the wrong number or something. i'm hanging up now." you smile half heartedly, trying to wrap things up, whoever this girl is can probably hear your labored breathing.
"hang up this fuckin' phone and i’m killing you myself!" she quickly responded, you froze immediately. especially after hearing some sort of bang coming from upstairs, “not so tought without your friends here, hm y/n?"
you were assuming this was a silly halloween prank call but she knows you personally! she knows your friends and even your name—you can admit that you were a bitch to most people but you didn't think that someone would break in and kill you for it!
"w-what kinda joke is this? this isn’t funny!" you let out a nervous laugh. no way this is fucking real, this is just a prank, right?
the person lets out a hysterical laugh—almost like she’s gone crazy. "you think this is a joke? was it a joke when you make every single day a living hell for me?" she asked but you remained silent, "now you wanna act like a scared little girl? don't you think its time to get what you deserve?" she asks.
the amount of people you’ve been a bitch too, its hard to guess who this person was. the fact that this persons voice was low and raspy to the point where you couldn’t even identify who’s voice this is didn’t help you either.
"i think we should play a game. i’d advice you listen, if you want to live that is." you can hear her smiling through the phone.
your heart is racing now, you have a gut feeling that this person is in the big ass house somewhere and that promise of her killing you is haunting you.
"fine. what's this game?" you try to put on that tough façade, still holding onto your pride.
"go upstairs. into your room." she commands you and you hate it but all you can do now is obey her words.
you grip your phone tighter and walk up the stairs—just like she said. you walk into your room. your pink led illuminated the room.
"good girl~ now, strip." her praise breaks the silence.
"what?" you whispered in disbelief.
"you heard me, don't make me do it for you."
you sigh, you really aren't sure why she wants you to strip for her. maybe to humiliate you on the internet on something but you comply to her demand, untying your robe and letting it drop to the floor. you stand, praying that’s all she meant when she said strip.
"do you not know what strip mean, bitch?" she questions, noticing that you're just standing there.
you stay silent, tears were beginning to form in your eyes and you let out a whimper, “why? are you some kinda sick pervert?” you demand, looking around the room.
it was silent for a while, it was like she hung up the phone on you. your heart was racing, you were getting anxious, “hello! where are you!? who are you!?” you cry out.
as soon as you asked that your closet door opened, revealing a figure dressed up like ghostface charging right at you. you let out a loud scream, backing up into the wall but the figure used that to her advantage, her long hands engulfed your neck, pushing your head into the wall and tightening the grip, forcing a strangled whine to fall from your mouth as you gasp for air desperately.
tears began to fall from your cheeks, your hands came up to hold her wrists before hitting them, desperately trying to pry them off your neck. she swiftly slapped you right across your face and manhandled your frail body on your bed, choked whines coming from you in the process.
“you look so cute like this, crying and at my mercy.” her tall body straddled yours, under her coat and her skirt, you can feel her bulge on your tummy. no way she’s hard from this.
if you were gonna die like this you might as well see who this sicko is, you removed your hands from the hands that were on your neck and you reached up to the ghost mask, removing it from their head. your eyes widen when you realized who it was. wonyoung.
her soulless eyes looked down at yours, a smile slowly found its way onto her face which made shivers run down your spine. she removed her grip on your neck, but still remained ontop of you.
you inhaled air almost immediately, trying to catch your breath before you can question the girl. but before you could even speak, she held a butcher knife right under your chin, “don’t scream or move.” she spoke menacingly.
“since you can’t seem to follow orders i’ll force you to,” she sighs. she starts to slowly move her knife down to your shaking body. the metal causing goosebumps to awake on your body. she trailed down until she got to your bra, she easily sliced it in half with her knife. “hey! i just bought this!” you spat, your first time wearing this set and it’s already ruined? this really isn’t your night.
“shut up, whore.” she’s quick to bring the knife back to your neck, pressing down on it but not enough to draw blood.
your bottom lips quivers which makes her coo before she gets off your tummy and flips your body over. you yelp in surprise with how easy she’s moving your body.
before you can complain she’s pushing your head into the sheets and placing the palm of her hand to your back, forcing you to arch your ass up in the air. to position muffled anything that you might’ve said and you felt your heart drop when you feel her bulge prodding against your ass.
wonyoung slices your panties as well before placing the knife in her mask. she pulls her boxers down along with her miniskirt. she giggles as she hovers over you of you, large hands pinning yours to the bed before she leans into your ear with a wicked grin.
“i’m going to make you scream.”
“w-wait!” you quickly retort squirming under her iron grip.
she wastes no time before she pushes her cock deep inside your virgin cunt.
it was like the wind got knocked out of you. you can't even make a sound, all you can concentrate on is the burn on your hole being stretched out. she had just pushed in and her cock is already kissing at your cervix, just how big is this girls cock?
wonyoung harshly gripped your hips and pulled out until her cock head was the only length left inside you before violently thrusting forward, letting out a long groan at the satisfaction. her hands left your back to grab your wrists to hold them behind your back, and forcefully yanking you back down onto her cock. she wasn't letting you get out of this anytime soon.
she was using your body like you were her human sized sex doll. drool was running down your chin and down to the valley of your tits and your eyes were crossed over, "for someone that hasn't taken a real dick before--you take it like a cock drunk whore." wonyoung muttered loud enough for you to hear. if you hadn't been too busy cryin' n moanin' on her dick, you would've made a snarky comeback.
she's never heard your voice become this high-pitched but she wasn't complaining, "s-so big! y-you're gonna break me!!" you whined through your tears.
"and you're gonna keep taking it all in your little cunt. even after i impregnate you." wonyoung quickly agreed to your statement, shooting three spurts of cum into your cunt.
you thought she'd be done but her hips never stopped smacking into yours, instead, she flipped you over into missionary. she swiftly picked up your left leg, placing it on her shoulder to reach a deep angle.
she continued to drill into your cum-stuffed pussy, her cock heavily throbbing inside you due to just seeing the lewd sight below her, "like being fucked by a killer, gonna cum all over me?"
"uh-huhh~" your eyes rolled back and your body began to shake. she took one of you tits that's bouncing with her thrust into your mouth, earning a loud moan from you. you suddenly felt a little funny, almost like you had to pee? your body soon went limp before you let out a whiny moan, squirting all over her dick and pelvis.
"at first i was just gonna fuck you and then kill her." she pulls out of your sloppy pussy and grabbed her knife. you flinch at these words, a bit terrified of what was gonna happen next, "but i think i'll make you my cute cock sleeve."
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bunny-jpeg · 6 months ago
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the group chat (oscar's version)
oscar piastri
cw: smut/pwp, filming, doggy style, lingerie, oscar's jacket, (slight) possessive behaviour (other drivers be warned!),
want a different driver? find them all here!
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it was the break between silverstone and mogyoród, it was only a week between races but it was an excuse to just do nothing before the second half of the season. the driver's group chat was in a slight buzz with photos of the week off (even though some didn't take the week off).
but on the day before everyone packed it up to travel to hungary, there was a 'ping' of the group chat. most didn't see it till later, but the contents were a rather large video file with no thumbnail.
"lastdayhome24.mp4"
the most curious got in a pair of earbuds in and slinked away from their prior engagements to see what oscar had sent. what the video contained was far more interesting than anything else they were doing.
"this is ridiculous." you said as you sat there on the bed, you were looking up at your boyfriend before you looked to the camera, "you better tell him how stupid this is after."
they weren't, not with their cocks throbbing in their hands as they watched oscar take you apart.
oscar had propped his phone up with the front facing camera pointing to the both of you. you were seated on the bed propped up on your elbows with your knees bent.
most of your figure was clothed with oscar's driving jacket. the pretty orange and black with the 'monster' energy logo at the collar. while the viewer of the video couldn't see what was past the jacket, oscar had a clear view of your perfect body barely clothed in skimpy black lingerie.
he was in nothing but a tight pair of briefs that did very little to conceal his erection. he couldn't help himself, it was a natural reaction to the lovely sight of his lovely girlfriend.
"i don't think they're goin' to be much help, babe." he said as he sat knelt between your legs and letting his hands explore your exposed body. he said to the camera, "i got her in a nice pair i got for in france. let's hope they survive the night, eh boys?" he chuckled as he continued to look at you.
you huffed and looked at him, you wanted to cross you arms but you knew he would just pin you down and explore your curves with his lips. you knew exactly how oscar managed to convince you to film a sex tape for the boys in the group chat.
it took begging, it took convincing, he was even going to buy your approval. he lavished you in praise about how he just wanted to show off his girl. you even had most of the others give written proof that they were not going to share this in anyway.
you were surprised how eager they were willing to even get the confirmation notarized by a lawyer if it meant that you'd make the tape faster. you knew these guys knew that porn was free on the internet.
oscar told you as you were putting on the lingerie that it was the knowledge that they could never have you. at least not while oscar was breathing. it was a tease of what they could never have. no amount of wins or money or trophies would lure you away from the australian driver.
"you don't know how much some of them want you." he said earlier, "your smile lights up a room and they're like moths."
"and what does that make you?" you asked, curious as to where this metaphor was going.
"oh, i'm the biggest moth! i'm the moth that'll kick their asses if they get too close." he nodded his head with a grin. god you needed him.
his hands dragged down the edge of the jacket, feeling the zipper under his thumbs. he remarked, "you look good in my colours."
you tugged at the collar a little, "i was thinking maybe a red next time... or maybe a green? or maybe a white!"
oscar narrowed his eyes at you before he went in for a kiss, his bare chest against yours and he wrapped his arms around you possessively. you squealed into the kiss and kicked out your legs.
"i'm joking!" you squeaked when he pressed all his weight on you.
he held you face and deepened the kiss, you sweet noises were muffled as he slipped his tongue in your mouth and pressed his weight further onto you. he kept you pinned down onto the bed. he said in a low voice, but still loud enough to pick up on the camera near by.
"i like you in orange, babe. let's keep you in those colours." then pulled away to leaned back on his heels and get his cock out of his briefs. he scratched the side of his face with his free hand as he stroked his cock.
he loved the sight of you, drank you in like a cold drink. his breath hitched and when you tried to take the jacket off to cool down he panted, "don't. i want them to see you wear it when we fuck."
you blushed, "you're such a possessive fuck." then was pulled into another searing kiss. your core throbbed from the tone of his voice and the slight venom in his voice.
he would never hurt you, you never had to worry about that. even if the green eyed-monster came out, you were oscar's precious girl. the kisses trailed down your neck until he got to your chest.
with your breasts still in the bra, he squished them against his face and rubbed his face up against them. then he left a series of wet kisses on the top of them.
"oscar." you said almost breathless as the kisses grew. you could feel the heat burn your cheeks as he continued to worship your body.
"my name sounds so good on your lips, babe." he chuckled before he gave you a quick kiss on the cheek and pulled back. his cock bobbed against his toned abdomen and he gazed at you lovingly.
he licked his lips with want, you looked too good.
you sat up fully and kissed him on the lips once more. you closed the gap between you two and stroked his cock with your legs in between his. he panted into the kiss and a sweet moan left his lips when you pulled away.
he swallowed and looked at the camera with his move star smile, "i get to tap that." and laughed before he turned his attention back to you. he watched you move back up the bed and get on your stomach, you raised your hips and gave them a little wiggle.
oscar stroked his cock to the sight of your ass in those little black panties. they framed your ass so sweetly. he knew he could rip them off and easily get a new pair. but the thought of peeling them off slowly was more appealing.
he licked his lips and said, "pretty girl."
you pressed your face against the pillow and arched you back further to entice him. you knew that oscar had a kink for his girlfriend, or whatever he wanted to call it.
it was almost endearing, he loved the sight of his precious girl all laid out for him. you whined a little, "are you to in love with your own reflection right now, piastri."
he laughed before he pulled the panties off of you. he groaned at the sight of you, even though the panties themselves left little to the imagination. but oscar gave your cheek a quick slap before he was running his hard cock against your slit.
"comon, piastri." you said as you shifted on the bed a little.
he kissed your lower back and palmed your ass for a moment before he said, "of course, dear." then pulled away to grab a condom from the nightstand drawer.
"play it safe, boys!" oscar chuckled as he put the condom on. then it was one hand on your hip and the other one his cock. he slowly sank in, he stayed still for a moment to let you adjust to it.
he knew there was times he went a little too rough and you ended up with some kind of injury. even though you stuck it out and tried to convince him that he didn't. he knew.
you softly gasped into the pillow at the stretch in your pussy.
"you like that, babe?" he asked as he started to move his hips, your pussy was a tight warm heat around his aching cock. he pushed up the jack a little bit to get a better view of your lower half.
you really did look good in orange and black.
you panted, you felt the jacket stick to your sweaty back as you felt him thrust against you. you moved a little back and forth with every thrust. you felt the heat burn your cheeks as he moved against you.
it felt so good, your buried your head further into the pillow to muffle your moans.
"don't hide your face, they all wanna hear you." he laughed as he held onto your hips with both hands and had you against his cock.
"you're such a pervert." you gasped. but it did make your pussy wetter.
he turned your head towards the phone that was recording you, you whined at the sight of you. you looked like a total whore wrapped in oscar's jacket. the bottom of it was pushed up to give him better access to your pussy. your cunt took him so fucking well.
you felt the heat sting your cheeks as you kept your face pressed to your bed. your hips bounced as he thrusted into you and he gave a fleeting glance to the sight of you two fucking in front of the camera. the screen reflected what was being recorded.
you felt a heat through your body as oscar fucked you. the sounds the both of you made were picked up on the camera. you knew that those pervert drivers were going to love the sounds of your moans over video.
"she's so perfect, boys." oscar said with pride, "no one else has got a sweet pussy like this. or a beautiful face like this. she's a real catch and you fuckers missed out." he laughed, "my babe." his pace grew and you felt his cock hit against your most sensitive parts.
you moaned against the bad and lifted your hips further to meet his thrusts. you could hear the wet sounds of his cock filling you whole with each thrust. you gasped into the covers and felt the thrill of pleasure through your body.
this video was nothing if not erotic.
you tried not to think about what the other driver's were doing to themselves when this video got posted in the group chat. how they wanted to admire your body, but it was covered in the driver's jacket.
oscar wouldn't give all of his girl's goods away that easily. he wanted the others to know that you were his. he leaned over you and kissed your neck, his chest pressed against the back of the jacket you wore.
you could feel a throbbing in your head as he continued to fuck you. you briefly looked at the camera and let out a string of moans as oscar just fucked your sweet pussy.
"my girl." he said with a curl of possession in his tone. it made you stomach flutter and your cunt ache.
your heart hammered in your chest as he rocked against you. you panted heavily. oscar's pace quickened, his cock bullied into your pussy. you felt the rush of orgasm thrum through your body, your cunt tightened around his cock as he continued to thrust.
"i'm close, oscar." you gasped.
"that's it. that's my girl." he almost purred, his pulse was in his ears as he bottomed out into you. the feeling of you even with a condom on felt good, there was something about you that just ran him raw.
he panted against your neck and slurred filthy praises into your heart. his entire body ached for you. his other half.
even with the camera on you, oscar would've made love to you that way you deserved it. his heart leapt at the thought of you, the smell of your shampoo in his nose, the feeling of you against him.
you whimpered into the pillow once more as you cunt clenched around him and you orgasmed. your head felt heavier for a moment as you tried to compose yourself. which was hard because oscar was still hitting all the right spots.
"oscar! ah!"
"almost there, babe." he panted as he practically was jack-hammering his cock into you. your ass shook with each of his movements. the bed shifted a little and the camera captured all of it!
oscar stayed with his quick pace except for the last few moments where he was more focused on hard thrusts rather than fast ones. He still pushed all of his cock inside of you and finished with a loud groan.
the clearest noise in the video.
"oh fuck." he panted as he leaned in and kissed your neck lovingly. he knew you were on cloud nine at that moment.
he pulled out and got you onto your back. he wasn't done yet. he however stop the video and started another before he got back between your legs and rub his hardening cock up against your slick pussy.
"let's give them a show, babe." he chuckled before he went in for another hot kiss.
it was two hefty files that were sent to the group chat. with the addition of a message that read, "enjoy!"
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drabblesandimagines · 9 months ago
Text
Swipe Right
Leon Kennedy x female reader, commissioned piece Lots of dumb fluff ahead! Thanks so much to the lovely @porcelainseashore for commissioning me with the brief of Leon using a dating app! I've said it before and I'll say it again - please do go check out Porcelain's fics! x
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“So,” Leon places his elbows on the counter behind, leans back and flashes a winning smile, “how about dinner later?”
The auburn-haired woman waits for her coffee to finish dispensing before she shakes her head, lips pursed. “No, thank you, Agent Kennedy.”
“Oh.” He was sure they’d had some sort of connection. Their eyes had met across the office on more than one occasion, flirtatiously so – had he read it wrong? “You have plans already tonight?”
“Mm, something like that.” She smiles, politely, picking up her DSO-branded mug and heading out of the break room without so much as a glance back.
Leon shrugs it off – he’s good at that – and places his own mug under the spout, about to make his coffee selection when a familiar voice chirps over his shoulder.
“Have you ever thought of internet dating?”
He spins round, surprised. “Claire?”
“Hi.” She waves with a smile. “So, internet dating?”
Leon’s brow furrowed, about to ask why she was here, but from the visitor lanyard around her neck it was clear it was down to some sort of TerraSafe business, but why is she going on about internet dating?
Oh.
“Wait, did you hear…?”
“The dinner invite? Oh, yes.” She nods, crossing her arms. “Does that ever work?”
“Yes.”
Claire quirks an eyebrow.
“Okay, not recently.” He retorts, turning back around and pressing the button for his black coffee to start dispensing.
“Uh-huh…” She steps forward, turns to lean against the counter to look at him. “I’m telling you, Leon - internet dating. I finally convinced Chris to give it a go about six months back, and he seems pretty happy. Been seeing a nice girl for three months now – a florist.”
Leon shakes his head, watching the coffee dispense with feigned interest. “Surprised Redfield went for it. How the hell do you introduce anyone to what we’ve seen?” At least with women from work, he didn’t have to skirt around what the hell he does all day.
“Heard of keeping work and homelife separate?”
“And Chris manages that?”
“I mean, she knows what he’s shared with her, but he took it slow. It’s not like the government can keep everything secret these days – not with everyone having a smart phone.” Claire grimaces, remembering the videos of the Alcatraz attack popping up on social media on a live stream. It was taken down pretty quick, but still popped up occasionally. They can’t hide it forever.
“Anyway, enough about Chris’ love life, I’m trying to help yours. Have you tried it? There’s websites and apps…”
Leon recalls a week of medical leave – battered, bruised and laid out on the couch on high doses of meds, flipping through the cable channels and losing hours to a show about people falling in love over the internet, only for the person to be using a fake photo of an entirely different identity and being crushed when they met in person.
“Isn’t that where the catfish are?”
Claire rolls her eyes. “We won’t set your radius that large.”
He looks down, a little confused. “My… radius?”
Leon’s not present on social media, but that’s hardly a surprise with his work. Maybe, if things had been different, he would’ve trawled through it at some point – joined a group for graduates from the Police Academy of ’98, checked in, gone to some sort of graduating class reunion where they would’ve swapped stories from precincts over a lukewarm beer or two in a hall dressed up with balloons and streamers.
Come to think of it, he doesn’t really remember the names of anyone in his graduating class, though he’s not sure if that’s down to a certain amount of knocks to the head throughout his career getting to him. He could look them up – they’ll be in some sort of database somewhere that Hunnigan could help him locate, but what would he say?
“Me? Well, I had one day on the job – hell of a first day, actually – and then I was ‘recruited’ into military training, so technically not a cop anymore either.”
“Phone, please.” Claire has moved to sit down at one of the small tables in the kitchen, now holding out her hand expectantly. He finds himself joining her, mug of coffee in one hand and the other pulling out his cell from his suit jacket pocket. He hands it over because it’s Claire and he’s known her long enough now to know she’s not going to drop the subject so easily.
“Have you got any selfies on here?”
“Don’t think so. Why?”
“To put on your profile. Anything I shouldn’t see in your gallery?”
He shakes his head.
“Seriously, Leon?” She must’ve opened the app by the way she’s scrolling down on the screen. “These are all sunsets and photos of your motorcycle.”
“What should I be picking pictures of?”
“Oh, wait… Here’s one.” She turns the phone around. It’s him, grinning, next to a corpse of a zombiefied lion. “I repeat – seriously, Leon?”
“Ha, yeah.” He smiles in acknowledgement. “I was trying to get Hunnigan interested in fieldwork with the spectacular sights.” Claire turns the phone back around and the sound of a camera shutter clicks out of the speaker.
“Ooh, that’s a good candid – and no-one needs to know what you were looking at.”
“Look, it’s nice of you to offer, but I don’t know about all this…” He rubs the back of his head.
“It’s 30 days free. Just try it and if you still don’t like it by the end of the trial, you can delete it off your phone and I won’t bring it up again.”
He stalls, taking a long sip of his coffee as he thinks. Claire means well, after all and if Chris has had luck with it, considering what Leon knows he’s seen and lived through, what does he have to lose, really?
“Fine. 30 days.”
“Great! Now, let’s set up your profile…”
--
Claire had given him a tutorial – swipe left if you’re not interested on a profile, right if you are. If the person swipes right in return, it’ll set you up as a match and you can start a conversation – signaled by a small speech bubble icon appearing on the bottom right.
It wasn’t until that evening that Leon tried it out properly, sat on his couch, killing time before bed and begins to swipe through. It feels a little odd – he usually likes to get to know a person somewhat before offering out his dinner invite, but this is mostly on looks alone, with a tiny snippet of profile information – age, location, what they’re looking for.
He swipes right on a blonde, her profile full of photos from beach vacations or something, says she’s not too far away from him and is ‘looking to connect with someone deeply.’ A chat box pops up immediately and after a moment or two, three dots show Beauty – he’s not sure that’s her real name - is typing.
Hey, big boy. What’s bigger – your forearms or… An eggplant emoji?
Oh.
He hesitates over writing back a response. He can flirt with the best of them, but how is anyone meant to make a genuine connection over this app? Maybe he’s too old for this shit.
He puts his cell down by his side and switches on the television instead.
--
“So…” Claire drawls over his shoulder over three weeks later, tracked him down to his desk.
“So…” He mocks back with a tease, swinging around in his office chair.
“Any good dates recently?”
He laughs. “How do you even get that far?”
“You’ve not gone on one?”
“Not for lack of trying.” It’s true. After Beauty, he had struck up conversation with a few more genuine girls that seemed to be going well until he’d broached the idea of a date and they’d drop off the radar. “A couple seemed interested but then stopped replying. I got one date – she didn’t show up.”
“Oh, come on.” Claire leans against his desk. “That can’t be everyone. Let me see.” There’s the expectant hand again. He sighs, picks up his phone and opens the app before handing it over to her.
She sets to scrolling through new arrivals for him, before she pauses. “Well, this one looks sweet.”
“Claire, I appreciate your concern but I just don’t think this app is for me. I gave it a go, I swear.”
“I know, but you’ve got a few days left on the free trial at least - you won’t lose anything. Just take a look?”
He takes the phone back and looks at the screen – a cropped picture of you, it looks like, your friends’ arms around your shoulders, a big, genuine smile on your face. Not a pout or a smolder in a night club mirror.
“Aw, you’re smiling.”
“Fine.” He swipes, but the message bubble doesn’t pop up. That’s the one thing he doesn’t like about this app – you never know if the other one will swipe back.
“No match.”
“Give her a moment,” Claire elbows him, playfully. “Not everyone is scrolling for dates at work.”
“Hey-”
“Speaking of, I’ve got a meeting. See you!”
--
You throw yourself down on the bed, a little bit tipsy after an evening of drinking with your friends, and hold your phone dangerously above your face – you’ve been so close to giving yourself a black eye from the drop so many times but never learn – and open up that stupid app. Your friend had encouraged you to sign up to it after declaring you’d been in a pity party for long enough now after your last break-up and it was time to get back out there.
You scroll through the latest arrivals, swiping left as you go. Everyone internet dates now, you don’t know why you only seem to attract utter creeps on it. You’d been on a few dates, but they’d all been entirely awkward outside the safety of the chat box.
You pause on one new arrival, Leon, 41, the first photo in the set clearly a candid. He’s dressed in a suit – no tie. Businessman, you wonder? Amazingly hot and maybe the most shiniest hair you’ve ever seen.
You roll over onto your stomach and swipe right, smiling when a chat bubble appears.
--
Leon had just settled into bed for the night when his phone vibrated angrily on the bedside table. He threw a hand out, blindly, and looked at the screen, half expecting it to be an email from work or a message from Hunnigan.
It’s neither – a notification from the app.
Hi, Leon. Thanks for swiping. Can I ask something?
He frowns – a unique opener, but it could still go the way of the others, he reckons. He’s not a prude, per say, but he’s seen a lot more than he was intending to these past few weeks. He backs up and has a quick scroll through your profile, vaguely recognizing your face from when he’d swiped right earlier that day – the girl Claire had deemed sweet.
Hi – ask away.
A bubble appears with three dots within.
How do you get your hair that shiny?
Leon barks out a laugh - definitely refreshing.
I’m sorry, I don’t think we’re at that stage of our relationship yet where I’m comfortable sharing my beauty secrets.
Please? Mine is so dull.
He clicks on your profile again and onto the photos but can’t see why you’re worried about your hair. Truthfully, all he registers when he looks at the picture is that sweet, genuine smile.
Looks pretty good from what I can see.
The camera adds all the shine. Are you using a filter?
Trust me when I say I wouldn’t know how.
Don’t know about filters but using a dating app? That doesn’t gel.
My friend suggested I give this online dating thing a go, so here I am.
Well, you’ll have to thank your friend for me.
Leon hesitates a moment, before shrugging it off.
I’ll be sure to, especially as it’s got me talking to you.
Your scalp tingles, but it seems nothing to do with the alcohol consumed earlier.
Too cheesy? I told you I’m new to this, right?
Nah, you’re gouda.
Leon grins.
--
The conversation continues to flow over the next few days. You talk about work – he keeps it vague, works in the government, can be called away on business trips last minute – and you are equally elusive in your response of office work. Internet safety, he reckons, smart girl that you are. Hearing his phone ping with a notification has quickly become his favourite sound.
Nice day? Definitely. Picked up my motorcycle – it’s been in the shop a while. Dare I ask what happened? He hesitates. Chasing a bioterrorist down a highway is perhaps a little too much…
Hit by a truck. I wasn’t on it - obviously.
Jeez. Insurance not just buy you a new one? I can’t think how that’s salvageable.
It’s my favourite, I couldn’t give up on her. You ever been on a motorcycle?
Uh-uh. Too scared.
What of?
Falling off, mainly.
No danger of that if you ride tandem - just need to be sure to hold on real tight.
You bite your lip, mulling over a response, but Leon fills the gap.
And I’d look after you, of course. Make a nice first date, don’t you think?
First date? That’s more, like, third or even fourth date material.
There’s your chance, Kennedy – don’t mess it up.
Well, then we better get the first date out of the way.
You bite your lip as you type back a response. Is that your way of asking?
If it is?
If it is, then I’m free Friday...
Perfect.
--
Friday morning arrives and Leon’s at his desk, typing up a report when his phone chimes. Checking over his shoulder, he pulls it out of his pocket and smiles when he sees it’s a text from you. You’d exchanged numbers the other night, deciding it time to take communication off app ahead of meeting up.
Morning. Question?
Morning. Still after my shampoo secrets?
Yes… But not that. How am I meant to recognize you?
I thought that’d be easy – by how shiny my hair is, apparently.
It’ll be dark out, though.
Is this you trying to be subtle about asking for another photo?
No comment.
Leon locks his computer, the screensaver switching to today’s date and time on a black background. He swings his desk chair around, looks around again to make sure no-one’s on their way past, and opens the camera app. He flips the viewfinder around and tries out a couple of smiles before snapping a selfie – if Claire could see him now…
He sends it through.
Included the time and date and all. Happy?
No comment.
Well, how will I recognize you?
Easy. I’ll be the one coming up to you and saying, “Hi, Leon.” See you tonight x
Until then x
--
The two of you had decided to meet at a bistro – varied menu for all tastes, not too intimate, excellent wine, spirits and craft beer menu.
Leon is nervous as he stands to the side of the entrance – an emotion he hasn’t truly entertained since 1998. There had been no time for it when bioweapons and death were staring him down the face. But, tonight… Well, he’s out of his element on this one. Leon had only ever approached women through work and, yes, it was to varying degrees of success but they’d already seen him properly in person, heard his voice, aware of what he does. There was a horrible niggle at the back of his mind that the date who had stood him up a few weeks ago had caught sight of him and turned heel on the spot.
He looks down at this watch to see it’s bang on 7.30. He’d arrived ten minutes too early, but didn’t want to chance being late and showing up in a fluster. When he looks up, slipping a hand back into his pocket, a figure with a familiar face is walking towards him, greets him with an anxious smile and an awkward half-wave.
God, you’re adorable.
“Hi, Leon.” 
“Hi,” He smiles, one hand still in his pocket, the other hanging down by his side. He wonders if he should’ve gone in for the kiss on the cheek, but he’s missed his chance.
“Erm…” You wring your hands together. “You okay?”
“Great. You?”
Why does he feel as giddy as he did when he picked up his girlfriend for prom back at high school?
“I’m good. It’s nice to put a… voice to a face?” You laugh – light and airy - and Leon’s already desperate to hear it again.
“It really is. Er, shall we?” He gestures forward with his arm.
You nod. “Let’s.”
The conversation is stagnant at first, a sentence here or there as you peruse the drinks menu and move on to ordering starters and entrees. With a little liquid courage, though, the two of you soon slip into easy conversation.
It’s just after the appetizers are cleared when Leon realizes he’s completely and utterly smitten.
You don’t even know where the time has gone, but all of the sudden the two of you are the only diners left and it’s clear the wait staff are looking for you to leave so they can begin their nightly clean down.
He follows you out and onto the sidewalk, a few metres away from the bistro entrance, standing awkwardly opposite each other – mirroring the beginning of the evening.
“So, fancy a ride?”
You tilt your head at him curiously before you burst out into laughter and he grins, rubbing the back of his head, awkwardly, as he realizes the context.
“I mean, I brought my bike here. I can give you a ride home - on my bike.”
You smile. “Not on the first date, remember?”
“Of course.” He nods. “Sticking to your principles – I respect that. Well, can I call you a cab?”
“Oh, actually, I’m gonna walk. I live just in that building over there…” You point up to an apartment building about halfway up the next block.
“I could walk you across the street?” He cringes as he realizes maybe he’s coming on too heavy-handed. “I’m sorry, I promise I can take a hint-”
“No.” You cut across abruptly. “I mean, walking me home would be nice.”
You cross the road in silence, both wrapped up in your own thoughts. You wish you lived slightly further away so you’d have longer to work out what to say, how to end the night.
“So…” Leon begins the other side of the road, the entrance to your apartment block just ahead. He’s trying to keep calm and collected, but there’s just something about you that has made his heart race, his palms sweaty. Don’t fuck this up, Kennedy. “I had a really lovely evening.”
“Me too.” You smile back – and you mean it – but you can’t help but brace yourself. Is this the part where he says, yeah, he had a nice time, but he’d rather not do it again? It seems all too good to be true. He’s the same as he was on the phone, messages and photos.
“Great…” You take a deep breath at his pause, unconsciously clenching your fists, “..cos I was wondering how you felt about a second date?”
“You’re really desperate to get me on that motorcycle, huh?” You tease, instantly relaxing. “But, seriously, I’d like that, to see you again.”
“Is tomorrow too soon?”
“That depends what you have in mind.” You stop, suddenly – the apartment foyer to your left. “This is me.”
“Well, we’ve done dinner, shall we work backwards and have lunch next?”
You take a step closer. “And then breakfast?”
“Fourth could be a midnight feast?” He steps forward too, misjudging the distance and something hard brushes against your stomach. Leon’s eyes widen in alarm. “Oh, wait, I…” He dips his hand into his trouser pocket and pulls out a travel-sized bottle of shampoo with a sheepish smile. “I meant to give you this at the end of dinner – my beauty secret.”
You yank him forward by his jacket collar and kiss him before you can even think properly about what you’re doing. You step up onto your tip toes to deepen the kiss, a hand bracing yourself against his chest for a moment before you mean to step back, maybe even apologise for pouncing on the man, but Leon’s arms wrap around your waist, holding you in place, kissing you back incessantly before you both have to retreat for breath.
“Well, if I knew the shampoo would get that reaction I would’ve started the night off with it.” He murmurs, pulling away and resting his forehead against yours. “I gotta ask though - you’ll kiss on the first date, but not ride a motorcycle?”
You shrug, half-heartedly. “One’s more dangerous than the other.”
He kisses you once more, softly, ending with a teasing nibble on your lip.
“Oh, we’ll see about that, sweetheart.” -- Masterlist . 1,000 followers event
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xqueen-of-disasterx · 1 year ago
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You’ll be a star
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Paring: camgirl!fem!reader x dads!bestfriend!Nat
Summary: Natasha couldn’t help yourself when she saw her favorite girl.
Warnings: SMUT, recording, dom!Nat, sub!reader, nipple play, clit play, fingering, pet names, mommy kink, mask, kink, G!P Nat, praise kink, breeding kink, unprotected sex,
!Disclaimer English is not my first language so please excuse any grammar or spelling errors. This story is completely fictional!
Masterlist
"And you are really comfortable with this" you asked your voice was small almost like a whisper. "I want to do this bunny, I mean it." She answered her voice full of confidence. She had agreed to help you with your life stream under the condition of not showing her identity which you of course respected. She was after all I known business women. You stranded her lap pulling the black baclava covering everything except a pair of piercing green eyes up to plant a reassuring kiss to the older woman’s lips. 
"I’m sure you’ll do great just be yourself and pretend no ones watching" You whispered against her lips pulling the mask down again. You turned to your camera and laptop seeing your reflection on the screen in front of you. Natasha wore a pair of faded jeans and a black wife beater making showing off her muscular build; looking at you you almost felt uncomfortable at your lack of clothing only wearing a matching set of white lingerie with small strawberries on them. "Are you ready?"
"I’m ready" she stated and you could see the excitement in her eyes after all Natasha wasn’t thought she was dreaming when out of all people you stood in the kitchen of your 2 days ago father. She had never meet you before after all you spend most of your time away at uni only coming home for the holidays or breaks. She happened to visit too in your two week visit in the summer break. She knew your face, of course she did, it was the face she jerked off to every night. You stood lend against the counter looking ever so innocent as your sweet lips curl into a smile as you spoke with your father; if he would only knew what his daughter was doing on the internet. And now she sat on your bed ready to experience everything with you. 
"The safe word is read" She reminded you "I won’t listen to stop sweetheart" You nodded turning to the laptop to press the record button starting the life stream. You sat back next to Nat as you saw the first few messages flooding in. 
Winter_Solidier: A guest? 
User85477439: Why the long wait?
User36298696: We missed you
You read out loud. "Umm… yes I’ve thought we spice it up with our guest here" Natasha nodded smirking under her mask you still weren’t quite comfortable doing this in front of a camera which made you so appealing to her, as if there was still a sense of innocence in you. 
— 
"Show them your pretty little tits bunny" Natasha smirked rolling er thumbs over your erected nipples. She held you to her chest, your back laying against her chest as she showed off your chest to the camera as you made pathetic noises in response. "Good girl" You moaned she had been teasing you seemingly endlessly never moving away from your breasts. Natasha glanced onto the screen reading through the messages
Denver-C donated $50: stop teasing her fuck her already 
User839236973: bring the guest more often 
"Mommy please" You whined out grinding against the air in desperate to find some kind of friction. "What’s the matter bunny you need to use your big girl words" You huffed throwing your head back as she twisted your already over stimulated nipples. "I- I need you" you whined your hips still buckling as Nat chuckled. "But I’m having so much fun you’re so sensitive" she taunted you "Wanna try making you cum just by your nipples" You shook your head winning in disagreement not expecting Nat to be so cruel. 
"Your viewers are betraying you" she laughed "They all want to see if you can cum from your tits" You were soaked as your juices were sticking to your thighs already. Natasha changed your position laying you down on the soft cushion as she latched on your breasts biting and tugging on them. You started to clench around nothing and your moans grew louder "Mhm mommy- ’m close" She chuckled before biting down again "Does my baby want to cum? Should I let you come" she whispered agist your skin "I think you wear good girl cum for me sweet girl" You didn’t need more to release your climaxing a scream soaking your panties in your cum. 
"Look at that baby, you made a mess all over the sheets" She chuckled hooking her fingers into your panties and pulling them your soft legs. "Such a messy girl" she coo’d against your soft skin. She manhandled you to sit in he lap again showing off your cunt to the camera keeping your legs spread with her her strong hands. "Don’ be shy baby girl show them what you’ve got"
"Natasha please" you pleaded, wanting nothing more then to be filled up by the older woman "What sweetheart, you need to use your words" You whined out, why had she to be so cruel. "I need you, fingers, cock I don’ care I need it now." She laughed at your desperate state "Should I let her have it?" She asked your viewers who are flooding the chat with donations or messages. 
"You got lucky sweetheart your chat is feeling generous" One of Natasha’s fingers trailed down to your gapping hole plugging it. She groans feeling how tight you actually were. You felt even better than she had imagined it. She started to move inside of you the heel of her hand rubbing over you clit. She stroked over your G- spot deciding to add a second finger to prepare you for her cock. 
She moved in and out pushing her fingers repeatedly into your tight heat. You threw your head back on her shoulder whimpering in her ear. "Are you close bunny" She coo’d and you nodded "Cum bunny cum for me" You climaxed over her hands your juices tripping down her hands. She brought up her fingers to your lips. "Open up bunny" Natasha pushed two finger down your throat making your eyes water. 
After she let you lick our own slick off her fingers her removed her hands from her mouth letting you catch your breath. She removed her jeans leaving them to pile at her ankles to tuck her boxers to her mid thigh revealing her lengthy hard on standing proud against her stomach. You were in an awe as you watched her jerk a few timer over her length before looking at you. 
"You can take that right?" You nodded still feeling a bit unsure she was bigger than anything you had taken yet. You strangled her lap Natasha gripping your hip to help you sink down on her cock. You felt a delicious stretch as Natasha bottomed you out. She let you adjust to her grit before you started to roll your hips. "Jus’ like that bunny" She moaned feeling your thighs heat against her shaft. "Good girl" 
She moved her hand from your hip to her to your breast rolling her thumbs over our overstimulated nipples. You had your hands on her shoulders moving your hips up and down moaning in pure lust. You knew she was just as close as you were. She started to thrust up desperate for an release inside of you. The thought of calming you with her seed inside of your womb made her go crazy. 
"Fuck" She panted "I’m gonna fucking cum inside of you, gonna fucking claim they tight littl’ pussy" With a last moan you came with her, your orgasms being triggered by the feeling of her painting your insides white. She had an iron grip on your hips to keep your hips moving to help you through your orgasm. You whimpered in overstimulation as she pulled you from her cocks showing of the mess between your legs. She sound of the donations was annoying her so she decided to hit the stop button taking care of you instead of further entertaining the creeps on the internet. 
"You’re gonna be a str Tasha they are loving you" you said in an awe as you scrolled through the comments of your lifestream. You laid in her arms as she kissed your temple. "I have to say it has a little kick" She smirked "But maybe I’ll Just keep you for myself Now" 
:)
I do not own these characters all rights go to Marvel
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saeist · 7 months ago
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my personal touya headcanons (yes i will make full on fics n drabbles with these in mind):
CHRONIC manspreader. literally takes up a whole love couch with the way he spreads his legs
can drive but gets motion sick easily so counting on him for a 2+ hour roadtrip? yeah pull over we’re switching seats
damaged hair from the constant dyeing but that won’t stop this baddie from dyeing it jet black every 2 weeks
only runs on 4 separate hours of sleep and snores like a truck. (u’ll need earplugs)
surprisingly tidy in regards to his room only because rei comes and checks their rooms and if its all messy they’ll get their asses whooped
doesn’t smoke cigarettes BUT has a box of disposables/juuls hidden in his sock drawer (GOD FORBIDS rei finds his stash)
^ in addition to that, contrary to popular belief his plug is unironically natsuo..
loves icy berry related related flavors too LMFAO
is supposed to be a junior in college on paper but since he keeps dropping and switching majors, he’s technically still a freshman
^ is currently taking chemical engineering (took business ad, computer science, finance, nursing (💀) and literally god knows what. his college majors that he dropped is between him, endeavor and god now)
since he’s competitive as fuck and is a perfectionist, took up multiple sports and extra curriculars growing up
prefers soggy cereal
drinks a lot but lightweight as fuck. after one bottle he’s out 💡 but that won’t stop him from drinking more!
knows how to braid girls hair thanks to fuyumi
cats warm up to him on the street cus he’s warm n shit
prettiest resting face but makes the ugliest faces known to man just for the sake of it (still pulls)
doesn’t approach girls, girls approach him
scares them away when he’s all like 😐🧍🏻
hooded eyelids + long eyelshes (both top and bottom)
genuinely starts tweaking when people say he got endeavor’s eyes solely bc hes a momma’s boy..
grew up being SPOILED rotten amongst his siblings so he doesn’t take no for an answer and will actually start stomping his feet
once he opens his mouth however.. everyone is gonna know he’s endeavors son fr 😓
keigo is his closest irl friend but tomura is who he considers as his best friend even if they’re only internet friends
has a basic pc set up and plays valorant fortnite and roblox religiously
shits on children especially shoto and his two friends
once babysat the three of them in exchange for concert tickets
did i mention he has an indie rock emo band he formed when he was in high school? yeah
bassist obviously but sometimes he plays drums
will scare rei out of her wits when he would just magically appear on their couch when he’s supposed to be at his university
his room is in the attic
dresses like hes going to an opium concert but rei makes him change before they leave to go to church so ultimately he dresses up like a cottagecore mf but with piercings and box dye jet black hair
almost broke natsuo’s hand when he first got his nose piercing
embodies the trope of “best friends older brother”
has a soft spot for grandmas and will help them cross the road each time
picks up shoto from school with his beat up hand me down car. literally one slam on the break away from breaking (endeavor gave it to him as his 18th birthday present)
sometimes ends up driving shoto’s friends home too if shoto insists (more like demands)
will also intentionally go through a drive-thru and the kids in the backseat are expecting him to ask them what they want but touya just gets whatever the fuck he was craving, pays and leaves
“we got food at home!” - touya to a enraged shoto
also sometimes touya is shoto’s chaperone or the “parent” that goes to those parent teacher meetings when its time for get shotos report card and will deliberately say shoto has failing grades when shoto is part of the honor roll just to again, fuck with him
shamelessly flirts with the girls natsuo brings home just to fuck with him (he gets sucker punched later that night bc at the end of the day, natsuo is bigger than that man 😭)
when all the todosibs are fighting, nobody listens to him even if he’s the eldest. they all end up ganging up on him (fuyumi doesn’t stop shit, in fact she instigates further. she don’t play)
says he hates winter and likes summer more but whenever its summer time if he could he would live inside the freezer
hates the feeling of sweating 😮‍💨
sometimes goes on days without showering only popping a lil deodorant here and there so rei forces him to shower whenever he just so happened to pass by her
cooks decent meals but shoto hates it and intentionally makes gagging noises whenever he finds out touya was in charge of cooking that night
hates doing the dishes and fools shoto into doing it for him
when he goes on dates, he steals endeavors credit card and just pays for everything. will probably even take you to nobu just to do so
attempts to blame natsuo when endeavor caught on since his card decline at the supermarket but unfortunately touya cannot lie to save his own life even if he tried
OH! talks MAD game in bed but has never touched a woman in his life.. painfully a virgin. u have to teach this man PLEASEE 🙏
likes yeat and carti
basically teenager borderline adult core
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httpsserene · 6 months ago
Note
I’m begging you, please write something for us Lance girlies.
𝐦𝐞𝐞𝐭-𝐜𝐮𝐭𝐞? 𝐛𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐤𝐞𝐝! - 𝐥𝐬. 𝟏𝟖 | 𝐞𝐫𝐫𝐨𝐫 𝟒𝟎𝟒: 𝐏𝐍𝐅 |
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𝐞𝐫𝐫𝐨𝐫 𝟒𝟎𝟒: 𝐩𝐥𝐨𝐭 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝 - 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐨𝐧𝐞
summary: it’s the most wonderful time of the year! you swear there’s love in the air. however, your friends, family, and fans think you need intensive therapy. content warning: vacation romance. girls trip. love at first sight. fluff. profanity. mentions of reader’s previously failed relationships. reader has a mom and sister. sibling dynamics (bullying). friendship. delusion. reader has a puppy. all photos are from pinterest.  pairing: lance stroll x fem!black!reader
from serene: i wish peace, love, and happiness on everyone’s soul…and i hope my unexpected lance stroll smau series distracts you from the torment of the race weekend. LOL xxx < 3
⌕ join taglist | requests & feedback | table of contents | series toc | next ↻
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twitter • ynplays • december 11th
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imessage • yn and friends
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instagram • ynplays • dec12th • winter wonderland ⚑
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liked by kyedae, taytagames, yourmom, and 13,244 others
ynplays: brr 🥶 if only their was a 6-foot, brown-eyed, strong man to keep me warm 😏🥺
tagged yoursister, yourbestie, yourfriend1, yourfriend2
view comments
user1 so it starts 😣
➥ user2 please let this be a normal vacation!!!
➥ user3 with yn??? no way
yourmom i didn't raise you to act like this…
➥ yoursister mom idk where you went wrong with her
➥ ynplays she let me have unmonitored access to the internet
➥ user4 ah that makes sense 🙂‍↕️
➥ user5 that'll do it mhm
yourbestie please can we go inside the fucking resort my ass is freezing as im typing this
➥ yourfriend1 u just mad bc u slipped and busted your ass
➥ yourbestie would you be mad if i punched you so hard yo nose broke?
➥ user6 heyyYYY come getcho friends yn!!!
➥ user7 they about to crash out 😳😳😳
user8 lots of athletes like to go skiing and snowboarding during their winter breaks 👀
➥ yourfriend2 DO NOT give her any ideas, pls im begging you 🧎🏽‍♀️🧎🏽‍♀️🙏🏽🙏🏽
➥ user8 american football players, basketball players, racecar drivers, hockey players, tennis players...😏
➥ ynplays omg ao3 fic, meet-cute, 654k words, love at first sight, strangers to lovers, no angst, happy ending, hockey player x yourname romance irl???
➥ yourfriend2 i begged,,,
twitter • ynplays • december 12th
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instagram • ynplays • dec13th • the slopes ⚑
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liked by yoursister, qtcinderella, yourbestie, and 15,093 others
ynplays: sega’s first snow and my first day on the slopes 🥹🐶
tagged yoursister, yourbestie, yourfriend1, yourfriend2, segagenesisthedawg
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user9 is your puppy named after the video game franchise, SEGA?
➥ ynplays yes! sega made mortal kombat which is my fav fighting game, so i named her after the company :)
➥ ynplays also, you can't forget about sonic and persona (super monkey ball too!!!)
➥ user10 me n the boys go crazy on super monkey ball
yourbestie pretty girl < 3
➥ yoursister if i was a man...mhm 😈
➥ yourfriend1 why do u always say some weird shit
➥ user11 turning your family tree into a circle energy
user12 are you just skiing or are you going to snowboard too??
➥ ynplays i want to do both! starting with skiing bc it's a "ski" resort ig? but i can't wait to try a board :)
➥user13 sounds like a fun! hope you have a nice vacay < 3333
user14 YNNNN ⚠️⚠️ you should get some of those plush turtles that you put on your butt so it doesn't hurt as much when you fall ⚠️⚠️
➥ user15 yes omg like this comment so she can see ittttt
➥ user16 those cushions literally saved my ass when i went boarding last year fr
➥ ynplays should i get one? do they sell them anywhere near the resorts?
➥ user16 yes, they should!
igstory • ynplays uploaded!
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[caption; well,,,i think i need skiing lessons. hope the man i ran into has less snow down his shirt than i do.]
user17: eating shit is a staple of learning to ski
user18: the man 😀🫨 ynplays: i think it was the same dude who opened the door for me !!! user18: babe that's fate atp i don't make the rules
yourfriend2: i think you're about to have your meet-disaster. look up, he's skiing our way ynplays: oGM WH$T TH3!?!!
twitter • ynplays • december 13th
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igstory • ynplays uploaded!
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[caption1; he said i was a total loss at skiing and taught me how to snowboard instead ;p] [caption2; is it love if he buys you $25 ski resort hot cocoa?]
user19: oh no you're down BAD
yourfriend1: idk if it’s love but it's a stupid purchase 👏🏽 i can tell you that much
yoursister: no the fuck it's not love 🤬
user20: $25 HOT COCOA?!! outrageous user20: you better marry that man ynplays: you understand me on an subatomic level
instagram • yourbestie • dec13th • the shredder ⚑
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liked by ynplays, yoursister, yourfriend2, and 8,764 others
yourbestie: we’re all way better at this snowboarding thing, even yn. thanks to her “brown eyed beau” 🤨 (her name not mine)
tagged yoursister, yourbestie, yourfriend1, yourfriend2, ynplays
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user21: oh them drinks look thirst quenching 🤤🤤🤤
➥ user22: i wish free refills were implemented worldwide
user23: they would have to chain me up in my room if i were at this resort...i'd be foaming out the mouffff 😮‍💨🥴
➥ user24: bro what 🤣🤣🤣
➥ user25: think it's time you get castrated lil bro
➥ user26: watchlist type beat 🫵🏽🫵🏽🫵🏽
yourfriend1: i thought this was supposed to be a girls trip :(
➥ yourfriend2: it never is with yn unfortunately
➥ yourbestie: FRFR this turned into the girls....and l****
➥ ynplays: don't be fucking rude 😒
➥ ynplays: he payed for our drinks and taught me how to shred ☹️
user27: "l****" ???? alright agents let's find out who this mfer is
➥ user28: *brushes off my criminal justice degree*
➥ user29: i've compiled a list of five letter boy names that start with L on a google doc and male celebs who have posted any ski resort pics or those who implied they were going
➥ user30: i have a google doc of all the male athletes who have posted any skiing/snowboading/resort pics AND athletes who implied they were going somewhere cold for holiday
➥ user29: ,,,i like your style. let's merge our docs 🤝
➥ user31: post the link on twitter and let's fucking get to it
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© httpsserene 2024
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hookhausenschips · 3 months ago
Note
Can I request plus size!reader where she is dating Charles but instead of her getting hate and stuff for her looks, the fans actually love her and question how Charles can handle all of her? THEY ARE THIRSTY thank you- 🦥 anon
Anon I love you, I enjoyed creating this. It might be extra cheesy but🤷🏽‍♀️🫶🏽
All Mine
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WC: 2.6k
Warnings: Thirsty fans, Charles is clingy, Y/N is a smartass but she loves her man
• you DO NOT have my permission to copy my work, upload as your own, translate, or repost on any other website •
Click here to join any of my taglists
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Charles Leclerc had always been known for his charm both on and off the track, but when the news broke that the Ferrari driver was dating a plus-size Black woman named Y/N, the internet exploded in a way no one quite expected.
Instead of the usual scrutiny that comes with being in the spotlight, especially for women who don’t fit the stereotypical mold, Y/N was met with nothing but love—and a lot of thirst. Leclerc’s fans couldn’t get enough of her confidence, radiant smile, and how effortlessly she seemed to handle herself next to the F1 star. But that wasn’t all. The conversation online quickly shifted to something a bit more… provocative.
“How does Charles even handle her?” one fan tweeted, accompanied by a gif of someone dramatically fainting. Another user posted, “Charles out here pulling a QUEEN like Y/N? Boy, you better be built for this!” with fire emojis.
The more they saw of the couple, the thirstier the comments got.
“Charles, blink twice if you’re okay!” one commenter joked after seeing a video of the couple laughing together at a party, Y/N playfully teasing him.
In an interview with a lifestyle magazine, Leclerc was asked about the dynamic between him and Y/N. His face lit up with a wide grin. “She’s incredible. I think I’m the lucky one, honestly. She’s got this presence… it’s magnetic.”
Y/N wasn’t shy about showing her love for Charles either, posting candid moments of the two together on her Instagram. One video that sent fans into a frenzy showed them dancing in their living room, Charles clearly struggling to keep up with Y/N’s moves.
The comments were on fire.
“How is he not on his knees for her 24/7?” one fan asked under the post. “Girl, you are TOO MUCH. Give him a break!” another joked.
At one point, during a Ferrari fan event, a group of women wearing matching T-shirts that read “Charles, can YOU handle her?” held up a sign that read, “Y/N, teach us your ways!”
Charles saw it and burst into laughter, shaking his head. Y/N, who was watching from the sidelines, waved at the group, flashing her signature smile.
“Maybe they should be asking me how I can handle him,” Y/N later joked on her Instagram story, winking at the camera.
From the moment I stepped into Charles’ world, I knew it was going to be intense. I mean, the guy’s an F1 driver, one of the most loved on the grid. But what I didn’t expect was the complete opposite of what I thought would come my way. The moment people found out about us—about me—it was like the fans flipped a switch. And not the kind of switch where they throw shade. Nope. These people were thirsty.
It started small. A few comments under pictures I posted of us together.
“You’re glowing, girl! But, uh, how is Charles handling all of that?” with a winking emoji.
I’d scroll through my Instagram and see stuff like, “We need to check on Charles’ endurance off the track!” or “How does a man with that much stamina survive with a goddess like her?” It made me laugh, honestly. But the more I saw, the wilder it got.
One night, we were at home, lounging on the couch, and I showed Charles a few of the more… explicit tweets.
“Charles, you good, mate?” I read out loud, barely able to contain my laughter. “Blink twice if she’s got you needing an oxygen mask.”
Charles took one look at the screen, his cheeks turning bright red. “They really think I’m struggling out here, don’t they?” he said, shaking his head with that boyish smile I adored.
I grinned at him, nudging him with my elbow. “I mean, they aren’t wrong. You barely keep up with me when we dance.”
“That’s because you don’t warn me before you start those Beyoncé routines in the living room,” he teased back, pretending to huff in frustration.
But the comments weren’t just about Charles. They were about me, too. The fans genuinely loved me, which was wild considering how harsh people can be. They loved my curves, my confidence, and how I didn’t shy away from showing affection to Charles in public. I was always expecting the backlash, the snide remarks about being a plus-size Black woman dating a guy like him. Instead, I was getting comments like, “Sis, PLEASE drop the workout routine because you look FIRE!” and “Y/N, I need your energy. Charles is lucky to even be in your orbit.”
The first time I saw the group of fans at a Ferrari event wearing shirts that said “Charles, can YOU handle her?” I couldn’t stop laughing. I waved at them, completely blown away by how extra they were. I guess I should’ve been embarrassed or something, but I wasn’t. I was feeling myself. And clearly, so were they.
Later, when Charles and I were back home, I sat cross-legged on the bed, still buzzing from the energy of the event.
“They really love you,” he said, leaning against the doorway, watching me as I scrolled through the photos of us.
I looked up at him and grinned. “They love us. Mostly because they think you can’t handle me.”
Charles raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms. “Oh, really?” he challenged, stepping closer, his voice low. “They’re wrong, you know. I can handle you just fine.”
I shot him a playful look. “Prove it.”
The next day, I posted a picture of us—his arms wrapped around me, me standing on my toes to kiss his cheek, the two of us smiling like we didn’t have a care in the world. The caption read: He can handle me just fine, thanks for asking.
The comments? Pure chaos.
“I BET HE CAN! 👀🔥”
“Girl, we don’t need details, but we’re imagining PLENTY.”
“I’m screaming—this whole thing is too much, and I’m living for it!”
Life with Charles was like this. Fun, light-hearted, but also deeper than the public ever saw. Sure, they saw the surface—how he adored me, how we were always laughing together. But what they didn’t see was the late-night talks, the quiet moments where he’d trace patterns on my back, or the times he’d look at me like I was the only person in the world.
The fans were obsessed, and honestly, I couldn’t blame them. But if they knew just how lucky I felt to have him? I think they’d really lose it.
It was the night before the race, and we were in our hotel room, another triple header. The race schedule had been nonstop, and though Charles loved the track, the constant travel and media pressure was taking a toll. He’d just gotten back from practice, exhausted, sweaty, and clearly in need of a break. I was lounging on the bed, scrolling through my phone, when I heard the shower turn off in the bathroom.
A few minutes later, Charles emerged, his hair damp and messy, a towel slung low around his hips. He looked up and caught my eye, offering me a small, tired smile. But there was something else—something heavy in the way he looked at me, as if he was holding onto something he wasn’t ready to say yet.
“You okay?” I asked, setting my phone down and sitting up on the bed.
He nodded, but instead of going to his suitcase to get dressed, he walked straight over to me and flopped down on the bed, still only in his towel. Without saying a word, he pulled me into his arms, holding me tight against his chest.
“Charles, you’re still wet!” I squealed, laughing as I felt the water from his hair drip onto me.
He just buried his face in my neck, mumbling something I couldn’t quite catch. I ran my fingers through his damp hair, letting him hold me, sensing he needed it. After a few moments of silence, I spoke up.
“What’s going on, baby?” I asked softly.
Charles sighed, his arms tightening around me. “I don’t know. Just… I missed you today.” His voice was muffled against my skin, and there was a softness in his tone that I hadn’t heard earlier.
I pulled back slightly to look at him, brushing a strand of hair from his forehead. “You’ve seen me like, every day. What’s really bothering you?”
He hesitated for a moment, then finally admitted, “I’ve been seeing some of the comments again.”
I frowned. “Comments? What comments?”
“You know,” he said, his green eyes locking with mine, “the ones about you. The thirsty ones. People going on and on about how… how they’d kill to be with you. And I know it’s harmless, but sometimes… sometimes I just don’t like it.” He sounded almost shy as he said it, like he didn’t want to admit he was feeling jealous.
I couldn’t help but smile, finding it cute that this confident, world-class driver was feeling protective. “Charles, you’re not actually jealous, are you?”
He looked away, his face turning a bit red. “Maybe a little,” he muttered. “I just don’t like the way they talk about you. They don’t know you like I do. They don’t get to have you the way I do.”
My heart softened, and I leaned in to kiss him gently. “You know you’re the only one who has me, right? No one else even comes close.”
“I know,” he said, his lips brushing mine softly before he pulled back. “It’s just—sometimes I get these thoughts. Like… they don’t deserve to talk about you like that. You’re mine, and I don’t want to share even the idea of you.”
I laughed softly, wrapping my arms around his neck. “I belong to you, Charles. All of me. No one else gets to handle me like this.” I gave him a cheeky smile, knowing that would make him laugh.
And sure enough, his expression lightened, a playful glint returning to his eyes. “Damn right, they don’t,” he said, pulling me even closer. “I’m the only one who can handle you.”
I smirked, enjoying this clingy, vulnerable side of him. “You sure you can handle all of this, Leclerc? Because some of those fans seem to think you’re struggling.”
He narrowed his eyes at me, clearly pretending to be offended. “Oh, please. They have no idea what they’re talking about. I’m doing just fine.”
I giggled, giving him a playful shove. “You sure? Because the way you’re acting tonight makes me think you’re feeling a little insecure, Mr. Ferrari.”
“I’m not insecure,” he insisted, his voice a bit defensive but still soft. “I just… I want to make sure you know that I love you. And that… that I’m the only one who gets to be with you like this.”
I smiled, resting my forehead against his. “I know, Charles. And I love you, too. More than anyone could ever imagine.”
For a moment, neither of us said anything. We just stayed there, wrapped up in each other, the world outside fading away. Charles held me like he needed to remind himself that I was really here, that I was his.
Finally, I broke the silence. “You’re so clingy tonight. Is this what I should expect every time someone thirsts over me online?”
He laughed, his arms still locked around me. “Maybe. Guess you’ll have to get used to it.”
“I think I can manage that,” I whispered, pressing a kiss to his cheek before snuggling into his chest, both of us content in the quiet comfort of just being together.
Charles tightened his arms around me as I nestled against his chest, the steady rhythm of his heartbeat comforting. The room was dimly lit by the bedside lamp, casting soft shadows on the walls, and the sound of the city outside faded into the background. It was just us in our little bubble, away from the noise and the track and all the pressures of the race weekend.
I could feel him relax a little, his muscles unclenching as he held me close. I traced small circles on his bare chest, smiling to myself. I loved this side of him—the part of Charles that wasn’t the confident, cool F1 driver but the sweet, vulnerable guy who just wanted to make sure I felt loved.
“So,” I murmured against his skin, “are you going to get clingy every time someone slides into my DMs or comments on my posts?”
He laughed softly, his breath warm against my hair. “Maybe I will. You’re my girlfriend—can’t let anyone think they have a chance.”
“Oh, they know they don’t have a chance,” I teased, looking up at him. “They’re just living out their little fantasies. It’s cute, really.”
Charles pouted, his brows furrowing just a little. “Cute for them, but not for me.”
I giggled, poking his side. “Aw, is someone a little jealous?” I teased, knowing exactly how to get under his skin.
He rolled his eyes, but I could see the corner of his mouth twitch into a smile. “You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?”
“Maybe a little,” I admitted, grinning. “It’s not every day I get to see Charles Leclerc all jealous and possessive.”
He huffed, but his arms stayed firmly around me. “I’m not that possessive,” he mumbled, though I could tell he was lying.
“Oh, really?” I arched an eyebrow, sitting up slightly to look him in the eye. “Then explain why you’re clinging to me like I’m about to disappear.”
Charles’ green eyes sparkled as he met my gaze, his hand coming up to cup my cheek. “Because you’re the best thing in my life,” he said softly, his voice barely above a whisper. “And sometimes I just want to make sure you know that. That you’re mine.”
My heart fluttered at his words. As much as I teased him, I loved how deeply he cared for me. His jealousy wasn’t about insecurity—it was about how much he valued what we had. I leaned down, pressing a gentle kiss to his lips.
“I know, Charles,” I whispered against his mouth. “I know, and I’m yours. Always.”
He kissed me back, his lips soft and slow, like he was savoring the moment. When we finally pulled away, he sighed, his forehead resting against mine. “I’m sorry for being weird about it. I just… I don’t want anyone thinking they can take what’s mine.”
I smiled, brushing my fingers through his damp hair. “No one could, even if they tried.”
He pulled me back down to lay against his chest, his hand gently stroking my back. “Good. Because I don’t think I’d survive without you.”
I laughed, pressing a kiss to his collarbone. “Well, you don’t have to worry about that. I’m not going anywhere.”
For a while, we lay there in comfortable silence, my head resting against his chest, his fingers tracing lazy patterns on my back. The tension from earlier melted away, leaving only the warmth of being close to each other.
Just when I thought he had drifted off, he spoke again, his voice soft and teasing this time. “So… you’re saying if they thirst over you more, I get more cuddles?”
I chuckled, shaking my head. “You’re ridiculous.”
He grinned, pulling me closer. “Yeah, but you love me for it.”
I smiled against his skin. “I do.”
Charles let out a content sigh, his hold on me never loosening. “Good, because I’m not letting you go anytime soon.”
And honestly, I didn’t want him to.
After a beat of silence, he added, “Just… promise me something?”
I tilted my head. “What?”
“If the fans keep getting thirstier, you’ll remind them who you belong to?”
I grinned. “Oh, don’t worry. I’ll make sure they know exactly who’s handling me just fine.”
y/n
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liked by fan1, fan2, charles_leclerc, and others
tagged: charles_leclerc
y/n: always asking how he can handle me, GIRL HOW CAN I HANDLE HIM. I’M SLURPING UNTIL IT’S FALLING OFF THE BONE😉😩🥵
[View all Comments]
arthur_leclerc: putain de merde, j’espère que maman mère verra pas ça [holy shit I hope mom doesn’t see this]
⤷ y/n: I will apologize later but rn…
lorenzotl: y/n please there are kids…
⤷ y/n: yes Lorenzo down my legs and soon to be swallowed
landonorris: I need you to log off
⤷ y/n: you’re not tall enough to speak to me like that you funky gremlin
charles_leclerc: Mon amour…
⤷ y/n: literally begging on my knees Sharl
⤷ charles_leclerc meet me in my drivers room 👀
⋆⭒˚.⋆🪐 ⋆⭒˚.⋆ ⋆⭒˚.⋆🪐 ⋆⭒˚.⋆ ⋆⭒˚.⋆🪐 ⋆⭒˚.⋆ ⋆⭒˚.⋆🪐 ⋆⭒˚.
CL16 Taglist: @esserenorris, @tallrock35, @yourbane, @lightdragonrayne, @really-fucking-tired, @evie-119, @ilivbullyingjeongin, @xoscar03, @ggaslyp1, @icecoldtires, @cmleitora, @d3kstar, @omgsuperstarg
F1 Taglist: @tallrock35, @yourbane, @hiireadstuff, @really-fucking-tired, @evie-119, @donteventry-itdude, @spookystitchery, @dhanihamidi, @decafmickey, @cmleitora, @d3kstar, @mellowluka, @ysnhua, @omgsuperstarg, @qxeenjen
309 notes · View notes
disneyprincemuke · 11 months ago
Text
testing, testing * fem!driver
nobody is more glad to be back in bahrain in her new race car more than the girl racing for andretti
pairings: fernando alonso x fem!driver, logan sargeant x fem!driver, oscar piastri x fem!driver, sebastian vettel x fem!driver, liam lawson x fem!driver
notes: hi surprise before the first race of 2024 and also because I've been writing this piece for like a week now
(series masterlist) | (📂 the sophomore year)
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she sighs, tilting her head as she looks down at the car. her hand hovers above the side pod as she grins, “ah, my baby. so pretty.”
liam, standing next to her, has a scowl on his face as he lifts his eyebrow at her. “what?”
“look at the purple on this car,” she whispers in bewilderment as she claps her hand, bouncing on her tiptoes. “she’s so pretty! i have a good feeling about this year, liam!” she grabs his shoulder and shakes him as she throws her head back. “this is our year and i’m going to win a race for andretti.”
“if you don’t stop shaking me, i’ll throw myself in front of your car and you’ll have to find a new teammate.”
she hums. “i have fred — toto will hand him over if i bat my eyelashes and say really nice things and offer free babysitting.”
“hater,” liam mutters, shaking his head. he turns his head back to the car. it is pretty: the purple and the specks of black give it a nice touch. “but it is a pretty nice car. it felt nice right?”
“it did.”
she sighs and leans on the car with her arms wide open. she pushes her cheek against the halo of the car. “i love you, my baby car. we’re gonna win a race together.”
“what’s going on?”
liam turns his head and shrugs. “not sure. might be the lack of ice cream in her bloodstream that’s making her like this.”
which is possible. sebastian and noah (her physical trainer) had banned her from ice cream for testing, afraid that she would simply camp out in the bathroom in the short couple of hours she has in the car today.
“i drank pepsi, it’s okay,” she giggles, scrunching her nose. she perks up with a giddy smile and looks around with her lips pursed. “where is oscar? he owes me timtams.”
“no chocolate either,” sebastian says sternly, furrowing his eyebrows at the young girl.
“what? why not?”
“because you’ll kill yourself when you’re in the car for too long,” noah sighs with the shake of his head. “eat fruits like normal people.”
“normal…” liam furrows his eyebrows as he turns to the slightly older man. “who eats fruits for fun?”
“they’re good for you.”
“they’re not all good. they could give you diabetes.”
“fruits can give you diabetes?” she yelps, shoving liam back a couple of steps with wide eyes. “i knew there’s a reason i resented fruits! they’re so unhealthy!”
“actually it’s because you didn’t have an ounce of internet safety growing up. you were traumatised by annoying orange,” liam mutters. only then he notices that it’s something he was sworn to secrecy by logan. he glances at the girl, breathing heavily as her eye twitches. “or so i assume.”
noah turns to her. “you’re scared of annoying orange?”
prepared for the girl to unleash some sort of violence on him, liam sucks in a deep breath as he closes his eyes to brace for impact. much to his surprise, she just nods and walks past him to walk to where her helmet is.
“yeah. and it’s all blythe watched growing up. so it was kinda,” she shrugs, “detrimental to my brain development.”
liam raises his eyebrow. “that’s the only thing that held back your development?”
“that and meeting you in my early teen years for sure altered my brain chemistry.”
“wow.”
“i know. kinda sucks, doesn’t it?”
pre-season testing has always been one of the days of the year that she’s most excited for. going out there and showing everybody she can do — it’s always fun to shut a lot of people up. and it’s the one time that she can drive a race car without so much pressure on her shoulders.
it’s lots of fun, really. and after not seeing a couple people over the break, it’s fun to be back in the paddocks to mess around with them.
she rests the helmet above her head and turns to liam with a grin. “if i beat you in testing, you owe me 5 pints of rocky road.”
“rocky–”
liam punches her shoulder gently. “you’re on. and if i beat you, you do my laundry for a week.”
“yeah– wait, how is that fair? boy laundry is gross!”
“you live with a boy!”
“i don’t do his laundry! logan’s a grown ass man!”
“enough bickering,” sebastian sighs, putting a hand behind her back. his other hand lands on the top of her helmet and slowly pushes hit down to help her put it on. he understands her excitement: she’s missed racing so much that she had resorted to bringing her brother karting over the winter break. “get in the car and show everyone what you can do.”
she squeals. “and beat liam and get my ice cream.”
“yeah, that too.”
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she drives into the pitlane, chewing on the inside of her cheek as she looks for the set of andretti garages. she sighs as she comes to a stop, feeling the car be lifted as they put her back into the garage for a little more testing.
“aw, hey! you’re back,” liam grins, knocking on the top of her helmet. she swats his hands away from her head as she grips on the halo to pull herself out of the car. “how was it?”
“i was not feeling great. but i reckon it’s just me,” she shrugs, voice muffled by the layers over her mouth. “i’m telling you — i need my ice cream. i can handle it without having to run to the bathroom before a race!”
liam scrunches his nose. “you’re not fooling anyone with that.”
“i swear, mate,” she throws her head back in frustration, “it was just the rookie vibes last year. i’m better this year.”
he hums, turning around to readjust the headphones on his head. “i don’t reckon sebastian and noah would believe you. but alright.”
“believe me!”
“believe what?”
“what are you doing here?” she giggles, covering her mouth as she hunches over. “you got my ice cream?”
mick sighs heavily, shoulders slumping when their eyes meet. he presses his lips together and shakes his head and her smile drops. “noah checked me for illegal items on the way in.”
“that asshole!” she shrieks, turning to the large doors where her trainer stands. “you don’t understand — i need my ice cream! i’m dying.”
“i know,” mick turns to the pit wall where sebastian sits, swinging his legs as he eats the ice cream reserved specifically for the girl. “i got caught. i’m sorry.”
she clenches her jaw and turns away from sebastian grinning smugly as her from across the pitlane. she hums. “i will find a way to get myself ice cream. just you wait.”
“i don’t reckon that’s a good idea mate,” liam mutters. “you’ve still got the afternoon session for to drive. maybe you should sit this one out.”
she wiggles her finger in the air as she walks towards the backdoor of her garage. “no can do. i’m sure oscar’s got some extra ice cream from me.”
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“no, you cannot race one another during testing.”
“why not? not even a little bit?” max shrugs, frowning as he throws his hands into the air. “just one lap.”
the girl, standing next to him, nods with a wide smile. “please? we won’t crash into one another, i promise.”
“you’re not supposed to crash into one another even in a normal race!” sebastian points out, scratching his head in frustration.
it is one thing to compare lap times when you’re pushing everything out of your car, but to go out on the track and race side by side is another thing. there is simply too much at stake, especially for a time like pre-season testing where everything is in shambles.
“okay, fine!” she huffs, throwing her head back before turning to max. she drops her head. “might i suggest a scooter race around the paddocks before the afternoon session today? after lunch?”
sebastian clears his throat, prompting both of them to turn their heads to look at him before max could muster an answer. “i thought i told you that you can’t use your stupid scooter without adult supervision?”
she looks at him in confusion. “i was talking about the scooter fernando got me.”
“aw, he got you a scooter?” max whines, frowning. “i wanted one — kelly wouldn’t let me get one.”
“seriously?” she giggles. “logan, oscar and i got one along. mine’s the cutest, i’d reckon. you might be able to use oscar’s!”
sebastian just sighs. he waves them off and turns on his heel and starts to walk the other day. “get yourselves injured, i don’t even care.”
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“you’re… asking me to join you?”
“what does it sound like?”
a sheepish giggle passes the man’s lips as he covers his mouth and takes a step back. “i feel so honoured. i’m being included in your activities?”
liam furrows his eyebrows. “what’s that supposed to mean? it’s just a scooter ride around the track before the new session. it’s not a big deal.”
“it’s literally a scooter race out on the race track,” she whispers, turning away from liam to look at fernando in confusion. “literally kilometres on a fucking scooter meant for kids.”
“and we somehow convinced the marketing team to film us doing it for content,” logan beams, puffing his chest with his hands on his hips.
they went on a limb when the girl texted their groupchat: something about helping her convince the f1 marketing team to let them book the track for 40 minutes so they could race on it without getting into trouble.
she walked in with logan, oscar and liam trailing behind her with a half thought out speech, a sweet smile and a dream. she barely even made it halfway through the speech she spent so long thinking over while she had her lunch when they agreed without another thought.
and being that it was fernando’s idea to get them all matching scooters (actually a gift to liam for his rookie year, but the girl had convinced him to get her one too), they invited him along as well.
and max, because sebastian had admitted that fernando got him one as well. he had been too ashamed to admit it, muttering about how borderline embarrassing it is.
“how did you do that? they never agree to my ideas.”
“how can you resist a face like this?” liam asks.
liam puts a hand under her face, logan squeezes her cheeks together and oscar pushes her nose up. she poses with her hand in a peace sign.
“i’d feel threatened if i were the f1 marketing team.”
“hey, take that back!” she cries. she swats the hands from her face and grins. “are you joining us or not?”
fernando shrugs. “sure, why not.”
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there’s a screech that breaks the barrier by the pitlane followed by the clanging of something. everyone pipes down, heads turning and looking around in curiousity to find the source of the scream.
“there’s no way this happened to me again!”
along the track’s grid is the girl sitting on the ground, hands up in the air with her scooter not too far from her. she’s surrounded by her friends first before the marketing crew finally takes steps forward to check on her.
“if i were you, i’d take this as a sign to just stick with a car,” oscar laughs, clutching his stomach.
“yeah, mate,” logan wipes tears from his eyes, “there’s no way you’re two for two falling down and hurting yourself on a scooter.”
her teammate, however, towers over her with hands over his hips. “i swear you might be stupid. how did you fall down again on a scooter that’s meant for kids?”
she looks up, genuine tears in her eyes as the red liquid seeps out of her palms. “you guys are so mean!”
fernando looks down at her. “are you okay?”
“no!” she holds her hands up to fernando to show him where she is bleeding. “it hurts!”
“okay, mija,” fernando grins, nodding empathetically. he puts a hand on her elbow and the other around her back to help her up. “let’s get you some first aid.”
max appears, actually being the only one that finished the race, still riding on a scooter. he balances on it and tilts his head, “really? again?”
her head snaps back around to max, taking a threatening step forward with an arm wound back to hit him. “max emilian verstappen!”
“not the government name,” he scoffs, furrowing his eyebrows. “this is why you fell down.”
“bitch,” she mutters as fernando whisks her away. “there’s no trophy so it doesn’t even count.”
“you’re just mad that max beat you,” liam snorts, rolling his eyes, “and fernando… and logan… and oscar…”
“you didn’t beat me though, so i’m fine with that.”
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“oh, my god?”
“what happened?”
the two germans walk into the garage to her sitting on a bench with her head dropped, being bandaged by noah.
“she fell down,” noah answers immediately, shaking his head as he spares her one more disappointed stare. “can you believe it?”
“have you considered just… not racing?” mick asks, tilting his head. “on a scooter, i mean.”
she shakes her head. “i have to be the best at everything.”
“wow,” sebastian blinks, “well, are you okay?” he looks over liam’s shoulder and rolls his eyes as well. “seriously? the same spot as before?”
“hey, i didn’t take your stupid smart glasses — just mind your own business!” she slouches and lets out a heavy sigh. “it wasn’t even my fault this time.”
liam perks up. “i didn’t do shit to you, mate! you’re just stupid!”
“you were screaming at me approaching me from behind!”
“i was not! i was simply singing the mission impossible theme song!”
“same thing! it was intimidation — you should have been disqualified for that.”
“sore loser!”
“you know what this means?” she hums, batting her eyelashes at sebastian with a small grin. this is her only chance into coaxing herself to completion. “ice–“
before she can finish her plea, her race engineer is already walking away from her with a hand held up in her direction. “not a chance.”
“okay.”
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“good results, mate!” liam screams, his claps filling the garage as she climbs out of her car. “you’re in the top 10!”
she turns her head towards him, the way her shoulders and back straighten an easy telltale of how she feels. she pushes her visor up, “really?” she sees the smug grin on his face, ripping her gloves off and throwing it at him. “there’s only 10 of us testing today!”
“you believed me, though.”
“i literally just drove several laps out!” she hits him. “you’re so annoying — i wish mick was my teammate.”
liam shakes his head as she takes her helmet off. “you don’t mean that.”
“i actually do. very much,” she sighs. she puts her helmet into the seat of her car and turns to liam, only then noticing that liam is now holding something out to her. “oh!”
“yeah, i got you ice cream!” liam beams proudly. “they didn’t have rocky road, but… i figured it’s still chocolate ice cream and you wouldn’t–“
he’s cut off by the girl throwing herself at him, wrapping her arms around him beforw pulling away to take the small cup into her hands. “aw, liam! thank you!”
“we’re going to have so much fun this year.”
“bold of you to assume i won’t run you off track like i did in f2.”
“i’m prepared to hit you back — you’re an adult now.”
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taglist: @wcnorris @treehouse-mouse @laura-naruto-fan1998 @mindless-rock @vellicora @leilanixx @ironmaiden1313 @angsthology @cherry-piee @christianpulisic10 @elliegrey2803 @33-81 @darleneslane @nikfigueiredo @happy-nico @namgification @localwhoore @sadg3 @kazuha-pista-badam @mellowarcadefun @glitterf1 @megatrilss1885 @peqch-pie @gentlyweeps-world @woozarts @meadhbhcavanagh @2bormaybenot @inejismywife @love4lando
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hadesoftheladies · 11 months ago
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actually, I DID have gender dysphoria as a teenage girl without being exposed to anything about it on the internet, on top of "racial dysphoria" and body dysmorphia
there were points I DID want to kill myself because i wasn't, or bleach my skin or change my body, i would have done anything to be a white boy at one point
which is both sad and funny to me because i remember two of my then good friends explain being enby and transgender to me and me being like "that doesn't make any sense" and it's because of trans-discourse we eventually broke up. the closest i ever got to accepting trans-ideology was transmedicalism with weak support for "queer" culture. i did not understand pronouns, but i understood dysphoria. but i did not understand how one could be a man or woman without the sex characteristics.
how did i heal?
one, i left church. that was one of the places i was most scrutinized for my physical body. two, i distanced from my parents, especially my mom. who often made my ocd and body-image worse (not because she was mean, but because she was always fretting about "decency"). three, i focused on bettering my personal space. writing, reading, watching my comfort shows, getting the focus off me. four, i started eating better, and my body became less burdensome. i stopped getting horrible period pain. five, i surrounded myself with self-confident women and stopped trying to resurrect toxic friendships with girls and boys (especially boys). started eliminating each toxic friend and focusing my efforts on healthier relationships. six, i'd started educating myself on my own history, watching and listening to more black and African people. even when i didn't enjoy what they made or resonate with it, i found i appreciated the experience and could allow myself to hate or love whatever i found.
by the time i discovered radical feminism, this was like, the final step for me: consuming women-centric literature and media. this was HUGE. i'd see paintings and photography of women in all shapes, colors and sizes. i'd listen to master musicians, read women philosophers, anthropologists, etc. this started mending a lot of what caused initial disquiet when it came to my dysphoria or dysmorphia.
basically, i took myself out of bad environments (especially those which force you to scrutinize every detail about yourself, like social media, i took long breaks from that), drew boundaries with people i couldn't get rid of, learned about myself (ocd, dyscalculia, anxiety, female biology) so that i developed understanding and could empathize, stopped centering men and white people.
now, while there's still a hint or trace of dysmorphia and dysphoria, it doesn't plague my life. it's like the occasional itch. more of a mild temptation to go down a dark hole than an actual threat. and i've learned how to handle those.
i learned the root of things. not just my history, but the root of how society worked and how it affected me. and i'm still learning, and my life is still improving.
so yeah, girls and women going through this is normal and common. anyone who is used to who they are being shameful is more at risk (like gnc lgb kids), but you can recover. usually better if you get out of the places that are making you sick.
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shurisneakers · 11 months ago
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unsolved (iii)
Summary: Bucky doesn't even believe in the paranormal. So who the hell thought it was a good idea to stick him in a series about everything haunted for the internet's amusement? With his loose-canon of a teammate who has no concept of subtlety or shits left to give, to make things even worse. (Buzzfeed unsolved AU)
Warnings: swearing, frustrated bucky at his little shit supreme, obnoxious reader, cryptids, graveyards
A/N: good evening. i am fighting demons (tummy ache). comments and feedback are always appreciated thank u for the love on the series so far i adore u guys sm <;33
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Previous part || Series masterlist
A few days after the first video goes up, Bucky returns from his run to a SHIELD file taped to his door.  
He opens to a black and white photo of him from back in the day, and a page full of his details. Full name, blood group, previous addresses, aliases, best colours to match his undertone, favourite Gilmore Girl boyfriend. 
He flips the page to the section on his known connections, only for a sheet of paper to fall out. Sharpie sprawled haphazardly across it, in big red letters. 
NO AUNT. 
BITCH.
He bites back a grin.
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The video does reasonably well. Not record breaking numbers or anything, but for once there aren’t TikToks of people counting how many times he blinks to make sure he’s an actual human. 
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Always a man of his word, though he has regretted it every single time, he agrees to a second video. It follows after a disgraceful bout of bitching and even pleading, but a few hours later, he resigns himself to his fate silently. 
That is until the schedule for the next video shoot is posted to the server, and he sees it’s at night. 
The night he uses to sleep. The night.
Before he can even type out his rejection, his door receives four sharp knocks. He doesn’t even need to open it to know who it was.  
It’s like you could read his thoughts. Probably could. He doesn’t know the extent of your telekinesis. 
In your hands is a large cardboard box and on your face is a stupidly big grin. 
“Good evening,” you greet. 
“Tell me the show’s getting cancelled,” he says. 
“Nope. We–” you announce, reaching into the box and shoving something onto his chest, “--are going on a trip. Demon hunting.”
“Demon hunting?” 
“To Westley Cemetery,” you add, letting the box tumble onto the floor as you grip its contents. “To catch the Westley Cemetery Cryptid.”
“What the hell is the Westley Cemetery Cryptid?” Bucky demands.
“Creature that lives in the cemetery, watches people from the trees and runs after you if you’re there too long. No known kills, but a couple of scratches and spooks,” you list off. 
His face twists. “That’s not a real thing.”
“Uh, yes it is.” You rest a hand on your hip. “My sources told me so.”
“Who are your sources?”
“Twitter.”
Bucky stares at you without a word.
“It’s totally real. It’s got a Wikia page and everything,” you argue against his complete silence. “I believe in it.”
“That means nothing.”
“Rude.” You glare pointedly. “Anyway, point is, we’re going out tonight to the cemetery and we’re gonna catch this thing on tape.”
Bucky tracks your gaze to finally look down at what you’ve shoved into his hands. It’s a headband, with two cameras attached to it, one facing your face and the other outward. Night vision, he guesses. 
He sighs. “How long? An hour?” 
“Was Hamlet written in an hour? Was Sharknado filmed in an hour?” you exclaim. “Great art takes time. We’re staying out there as long as we need to. So help me, we will emerge victorious.”
Bucky stares at you. “Two hours.”
“Seven.”
“Thirty minutes.”
“Your will is weak and your spirit is cowardly.” You return his fixed look with equal intensity, if not more, which he didn't think was possible. “Three hours.”
“Deal.”
“Great.” You stick your hand out, and he grabs on firmly. “See you at 1am.”
“1am?!”
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It is 1am, it is cold and Bucky is miserable. 
But he’s there. In the cemetery. With the stupid camera rig on his head. 
You offer him whiskey to warm him up, and he agrees. 
You then tell him you don’t actually have any because you didn’t think he’d accept.
He hates it here.
The wind whistles around the both of you. The eerie silence is only compounded by the fact that he can’t see anything beyond a certain point. The night is especially dark and there is no moonlight.
He trudges through the patchy grass, dry leaves crunching under his boots.
The camera being so close to his face along with the fact that you wouldn’t stop singing the same three fucking lines of the song over and over again, makes him want to tear his hair out.
“That thing’s not gonna get near us if you don’t shut up,” he grumbles.
“Nonsense,” you hum. “I’m a goddamn delight. He’s gonna be trippin’ over himself to get to me.”
“He doesn’t exist.”
“He definitely does, and you know what? I bet your shit vibes are gonna attract him. Moth to flame and all that. Karmic justice.” 
Bucky stares straight ahead, swerving to avoid running into cracked tombstones. 
You go back to singing, but worse this time. 
“What if we don’t get anything?” he interrupts, to protect his sanity. “No one wants to watch a bunch of people just walk around the dark for 20 minutes.”
There’s no response. 
It takes a second for Bucky to realise the singing’s stopped too.
He stops in his tracks, head swivelling to look for you.
“The fuck…” he mutters. 
In the cemetery, he is truly alone for a moment. Silent, other than wrought iron gates creaking in the far distance. 
The leaves of the tree above him rustle.
Bucky looks up, squinting against the darkness. 
Against the stillness of the night, he sees it. A figure stands tall on the branches of the tree, silhouette obscured by the leaves. 
It leers down at him, unmoving.
Bucky doesn’t even flinch.
“Very funny,” he says. “Hilarious.”
“We’ll fake it,” the figure calls from above. “If we don’t get any footage, I’ll just get on up there and fuck around and you record.”
“Get down,” he demands. “We’re not faking footage.”
If this show had to die this way, so be it.
“Bore,” you boo, lowering yourself to the ground with ease. “If I didn't know any better, I’d say you don’t want to be a part of this series.”
“I don’t.”
“Anyway,” you say obnoxiously, “we won’t have to. There is definitely a cryptid here. I can feel it in my bones.”
“We’re halfway through the graveyard and there’s nothing here,” he shoots back. “We should call it quits.”
“You’re right,” you say, to his surprise. “We need to cover more ground. Let’s split up.”
That is most definitely not what he was saying.
But you start singing again and so Bucky agrees faster than you finish the same stupid third line for the hundredth time that hour.
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Bucky is a man of dignity.
Less than five minutes later, he gives up.
He takes a seat against the trunk of a tall tree, in a relatively open clearing. 
He figures if he just takes a nap then the two hours would pass by quicker. 
Bucky has no idea where you’ve gone. The lack of light doesn’t help, even with his advanced vision. 
He crosses his arms behind his head and settles back, eyes closing. 
Not even a second later, he wants to rip his hair out when the stupid song you were singing reintroduces itself in his head.
“For fuck’s sake,” he groans. 
The tree he’s leaning against shifts ever so slightly.
His eyes fly open, but he doesn’t move an inch.
Instinctually, his breathing slows and his ears tune in to pick up even the faintest sounds.
The draft whispers, and he knows for a fact that something is above him.
A branch cracks. 
“Go away,” Bucky says loudly. 
A second passes. 
And then another. 
“You’re supposed to be looking for the thing,” you shout.
“It’ll find me if it wants to.” He shifts to make himself more comfortable. “I’m givin’ him a real shot here.” 
“You didn’t even look up.”
“Didn’t have to.”
“He could have been above you.”
“But he wasn’t.” Bucky’s eyes close again. 
“You’re terrible.” It comes back muffled, and branches shift. “I’m headin’ that way. One of us has to put some effort into this.”
“Joy. Knock yourself out.”
The trunk moves under his muscles again and Bucky lets out a small exhale, settling back into the position he was in.
Until he hears you singing in the distance. Same three lines, same off-key tune.
Bucky drags his palm across his face. 
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An hour passes. 
Unlike his original plan, he does not sleep.
He instead recounts every element he remembers from the periodic table. 
Replays every Dodgers game from his childhood, and then gets mad at their shift. 
Then he tries to recollect every fact he knows about you so far. Mutant, captured and experimented on, broke free several years before him. Met Nat along the way and befriended her. Telekinesis, slowed aging. Escape artist. Wedding videographer. Allegedly.
He just doesn’t get how you’re so goddamn chirpy all the time, given that he’d been through something similar and come out the way he had. 
It had taken him a month to say anything to anyone other than Steve. You went out for brunch with Sam the same weekend you showed up at the compound.
He doesn’t get you.
Speaking of which, he hasn’t actually seen you in a while. 
He checks the time on his watch. Nearly 3am.
He had a fucking workout in the morning and no lizard-man was going to be the cause for Steve outrunning him.
He pushes himself off the ground with a groan, and stretches out his sore limbs. Definitely too old for lying around a cemetery beyond midnight.
He calls out your name loudly, and then again, before waiting. 
He hears bells ringing in the distance. 
Bucky looks up.
In the shadows of the trees, he comes face to face with the same sight as before. A figure, standing on the branches.  
“There’s nothing here,” he calls out, sighing. “Can we just leave?”
The twigs creek, and for a second he thinks you’re going to fall. 
“Already told you I’m not faking footage, get down from there,” he repeats. “I’m leaving. I’ll see you at the gate.”
The leaves shuffle around before he hears branches break. 
Something you say gets obscured by your movement, but you disappear again. He thinks that maybe you were cursing him out, and deservedly so. He just couldn’t find it in himself to care. 
He rolls his eyes, but starts making his way to the entrance of the graveyard.
The walk back is faster, and he holds back a yawn as the gates start creeping up on the horizon. 
There’s no sign of you. He half thinks you ditched him here and went back to the compound. Or fell off the tree and were just laying there. 
But he decides to wait, leaning against the exposed concrete wall. 
Eyes closed, he rubs his temples and decides that if you’re not here in the next thirty seconds, he’ll just–
“Hey,” you greeet from right in front of him.
“Where the hell did you go?” he demands. 
You blink at him, before holding up a wrapper. 
“Got a sandwich. I was hungry. The diner was real nice too, I spent like half an hour talkin’ to the owner.”
He stares at you. “You just left to get a sandwich?”
“Yeah, and I got you one, too,” you reply, tossing him a paper bag. “You’re welcome. God bless that man, but those things aren’t cheap.”
“You’ve not been here for the last half hour?”  
“I mean, I spent like ten minutes looking.” You shrug, taking another bite. “All I got was a bunch of grass.”
Ten minutes. Bucky had sat under the stupid tree for an hour. 
“So you just left,” he says dryly.
“Yes,” you reply like it’s not even worth debating. “Besides, if anyone could find a cryptid it’d be you. A fellow cryptid.”
Bucky spins on his heel to leave.
“You’re welcome for dinner,” you call out, and he can hear you laugh.
He flips you the finger, and regrets it a second later when your singing resumes.
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The sandwich is good. He appreciates it.
He even manages to keep pace with Steve the next morning. 
What he doesn’t appreciate is coming back to fifteen missed calls and four video calls from you.
From: co-host (TGS)
can you pick up 
From: co-host (TGS)
i know you have nothing going on in your life you are bitchless
Bucky switches off his phone for the next three hours. 
Finally, it’s a threat that you will show up at his door again and Bucky finally video calls you back that evening. 
“What,” he states.
“Took you long enough,” you huff, sitting up to adjust the camera. In the middle of the ordeal, Bucky sees your laptop open.
“What do you want?” he repeats.
“The team sent over the videos from last night,” you tell him. “At some point in the video you said ‘we’re not faking footage, get down from there.”
“Yeah.”
He hears you play the footage faintly in the background, almost to substantiate your point. He cringes at the sound of his own voice.  
“Who were you talking to?” 
Bucky rolls his eyes. “Heard you in the trees. Figured you climbed up there again.”
“Ah.” You click your tongue. “Interesting.”
“What.”
You hum. “See, that wasn’t me.”
Bucky’s eyes narrow. “Yes, it was.”
“No, it wasn’t,” you say calmly. “I’d left to get dinner way before all that.”
“Right.”
“I’m serious. Got the timestamp on my video to prove it.” You look up at him through the camera finally. “So who were you actually talking to, Barnes?”
Bucky’s nose twitches.
“Bye,” he says shortly.
“Dude,” he hears you laugh loudly through the phone. “I fuckin’ told you you’d attract these things, you–”
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bitdemonic · 1 year ago
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date. may 29th, 2023
time. 3:16pm
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—❝𝐜𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐦𝐞.❞
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𝐬𝐲𝐩𝐧𝐨𝐬𝐢𝐬. future spouse pac ✞ pics with them
𝐚𝐢𝐝. if the images above are too hard to differentiate between your intuition, use ‘pile 1, 2, 3, or 4’ for the choice selection instead. this reading has five piles and each pile is different in terms of context.
𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐫. 18+ content—no minors. please remember, this post is just for shits and giggles. pinch a grain of salt and use the best of your discernment. i tend to write under the impression that majority of this content’s viewers are women however i read for both feminine and masculine energies. if needed to, please flip the roles as reversed for an accurate message. hope this reading is useful, but not for plagiarism bitch. enjoy.❦
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𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐞 ✞
🃏lovers. 5oc. magician↺. queen of pentacles↺. tower↺. strength↺ and peace.
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let it be mentioned that the lovers card amplifies all of the energy that follows; def intense because i could feel it within the deck itself. pictures here are raw, they’re always unfiltered and passionate at w.e moment they’re taken. to me, y’all are the literal definition of ownership lmao so it’s hard not to notice the obsession with each another. y’all’s chemistry is def eye-catching, tantalizing to say the least. “mine.” there are resemblances between y’all, matching tattoos or even being mistaken for brother and sister. to put it in a nutshell, this is tongue kissing on the main and taunting old exes—it’s obvious there’s bomb ass sex with each other lmao, but more importantly there is devotion.
apart from posting on social media, there’s internet presence around y’all—could be popular influencers or just outright celebrities. possible youtube couple? very de’arra and ken vibes. either way, someone in the connection (if not both) went or will go viral. the tower in retrograde, this is a specific picture at a specific point in time; it even has the potential to be life changing. “break the internet.” attention that brings problems ngl. sure someone’s jealous ex, but apart from them there is so much outside negativity towards the feminine. people are pissed when she comes across their feed, but only because they secretly want to be her. queen of coins in retrograde; envy that simmers from deep within until it becomes hatred or outer turmoil. seeing pics sent in groupchats, hate comments from spam accounts, posting on close friends—her presence triggers insecurities and people hurt under pressure. black moon lilith. as delusional as it sounds, this is an eerie situation to be in fr so be mindful.
the masculine doesn’t stand a chance omg, the feminine is deadass the star of the show. represented as the queen of wands, she’s outshining tf out of him without even trying lmao. glamorization of what the masses can see, which undeniably is her beauty. this is “off guard” pretty, bad pictures just simply don’t exist. if y’all wear makeup, it’s very complimented—the blending and baking, or contour and highlighter are a ten. this even pertains to the first paragraph, how someone here is in the public eye, because pictures of her are taken unbeknownst due to her appearance. the magician in retrograde signifies fan cams, video edits, and pinterest boards—there’s also editorials and photoshop? mentions of an aesthetic came in, or “neptune.”
all in all, this couple has magnetism and attracts opportunities due to their pictures. def some gorgeous people, it was noted that y’all’s face cards elite lmao. however, y’all have to be cautious because taboo-ism is prone to happen as well. such as scamming or catfishing, things that could cause detriment to future occasions. outsiders are the issue here, they’ll def try to bank off on y’all’s identities. something could or could’ve already happened with a certain picture? “controversy.” the response to it is fifty-fifty; half who are defending and half who are criticizing. “stans” and a “fandom” are involved.
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📸 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐭𝐬
❦�� from behind. the masculine will tower behind the feminine (no matter the height), engulfing her in a bear hug or whatever else to imply their presence. head buried in her neck, hands wrapped around her waist—this also denotes their possessiveness as partners together.
❦— pretty teeth. big big smiles here, the goofy grins and shut eyes. y’all countdown before taking a picture but numerous times because y’all can never be serious lmao. fingers in mouth type smiley faces.
❦— beauty queen. this is more-so on the feminine’s behalf, she’s the one that’s always ready for a picture and the one always asking someone to take one of her. being photogenic is one of her best features to date. no matter if y’all agree, but i’m def seeing the face of a model.
❦— cancer. this made me think of ariana grande and her husband dalton, their pic outside with the moon behind them. this is pictures in that same setting, or at least taking them during the nighttime. 8pm thru 5am. stargazing together is here too.
❦— taurus. this actually alludes to more than one thing. the masculine is a gift giver, i pulled the “sugar daddy” card for them in particular. they def have big bucks, or at least enough to gift you the finer things in life. they’ll spoil you for fun and in turn you’ll show off what they bought you—new toys lol. pics of the “next big thing” (vacation views, receipts or tickets, cars, etc). smell goods are specific, perfumes or colognes.
“glutton” corresponds with taurus as well—someone in this connection loves to chow down, meaning tons of food cameos in their (own) pictures. they’ll pose funnily; mid-chew or with a bunch of food stuffed in their mouth to be annoying lol. little dorky things like putting an orange peel in their mouth before they smile.
❦— do not disturb. pretty self-explanatory, but for y’all this seems to be alone time from the world. this reminded me of travel, but i channeled that this is to each others hometowns. this could be an interracial connection, mentions of cultural traditions and differences.
❦— naked bodies. the feminine’s chest is significant, something about that area in particular that the masculine loves. there’s pics of them fondling or sucking on her nipples, playing with them even. someone’s v-line is here, plus a hand going up their abdomen. the masculine’s bare ass is source material too, those pics are for funsies.
❦— topping. this could obviously mean they’re a daddy dom in general lmao, but if not it just means the masculine will be hunched over or “taller” than the feminine. she’ll be lower than him, as in he’s standing and she’s sitting or she’s laying down beneath him. sex-wise this is them doing it from behind or being on top quite literally.
❦— foreplay. tbh this one is vague, but i still wanted to put it in bc why tf not. this is while y’all are in the moment, or while someone is teasing the other before actual intercourse. pictures of them while they’re giving you hickies, or while they’re pulling at your underwear to give you oral. somebody’s an ass muncher too so expect pics of that lmaooo.
❦— sloppy. no but yes iykyk😂 this is more on the pic itself, how it won’t be organized or captured clearly during sexual moments. like if you’re pleasuring them and have them take a picture, it’ll just come out fucked and unfocused because they’re fucked and unfocused. kinda what would’ve been the perfect shot if y’all weren’t so “distracted”.
brooklyn and nicola peltz-beckham (hot ass names) are the perfect couple example for this pile. their expressiveness together is subtle, yet loud enough that we know they’re each other’s one and only. regardless of how long the relationship lasts, we’ll remember the fact that they were ultimately made for each other.
end.❤️‍🔥 previous reading
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𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝐭𝐰𝐨 ✞
🃏king of cups. princess of cups. 2oc. 5op↺. 8oc↺. rest and comfort.
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this spread screams emotional depth, it’s haunting as hell but not in a bad way—in a way that’ll pull your soul into its deep abyss. hypnotic almost. this is “grow old together” love, i can literally feel the years in my bones. these are moments that you can’t help but reminisce on, pictures that are saved or bookmarked because they’re so very special. their essence is felt and appreciated, enough that there’ll be tears of happiness. lmao this is going to sound corny, but this connection’s energy reminds me of a warm blanket. like milk and cookies on the sofa, or a kiss goodbye from grandma. it’s just so snug, i can’t even put into words how safe i feel right now. how libras are sweet and tender, fragile enough to shatter if you aren’t gentle—this is softness at its finest.
[TW] substance abuse could’ve been an reoccurring issue in this relationship, or at least a bad problem. the five of pentacles being in retrograde was an indication of sobriety to me, along with the image of somebody holding their own sobriety chip with a smile—not for everyone, but pictures under this circumstance are meant to remember the past without having to revisit the pain. “encouragement.” it’s apparent at this point lmao, but the sweetest captions known to man are found here. paragraph after paragraph, an everflowing stream of appreciation for your partner. endearing birthday posts are significant, along with sweet nothings in the comments omg y’all are sapsss. if i had to put it in words, “smol” or “wubs” come to mind before anything else omg y’all are sapssssss.
there are before and after pictures with each other (childhood friends, neighbors, friend of a friend, etc.) because again “growing old iem together”, there’s a sense of watching each other through the years. feeling the vibe of them being around as kids, transitioning into adulthood then getting closer as grownups. if not tho, this is someone that you’ll literally feel at home with; they are home to be real. this is a person that’s familiar, regardless of if they’re new or not. y’all are going to be glued to each other’s side until death. similarities are here, but in the sense of same environment or same social circle. i’m also getting similar taste in hobbies, music, and clothing. meditation or gym pics are common, promoting balance and wellbeing is a shared interest. personalities in general, ya’ll coordinate so very well. no wonder people linger longer than they need to—they’re wanting to see what’s next with the world’s cutest couple. also because y’all are walking enigmas and it threatens them lmao.
the attributes of venus sums up y’all’s pictures together. they’re beautiful, and are the literal definition of a thousand words. i channeled date night, but this came to being in the kitchen most of the time. y’all love to cook together, or to be in the kitchen at the same time to goof off and be annoying. dinner at home happens frequently, i’m seeing someone set the table while the other chops vegetables and stirs the pot. there’s pictures of handwritten love letters or random bouquets of flowers, things that tend to sweeten life with them a little more than before. this is def “fell in love with my best friend”, even as a photo caption lol. friends in general are around y’all—drunk nights at the bar, group poses in front of an amusement park, eating edibles and doing vlogs, etc. a lot of moments with your future spouse include people y’all are close with as a couple (siblings, co-workers, group of friends). nostalgia is the overall vibe here. pictures together feel good and “homey”.
extra mentions because i can’t even get over this pile, this is my favorite one out of all of them. it just feels how a polaroid looks, but in the sense of being in love? i just keep seeing the little things🥹 walking alongside the beach, kissing in the photo booth, building a gingerbread house, picking their nose even lmao. wow ya’ll have custom fridge magnets too. i didn’t get that pics of them were frequent on social media, more so because they’re too special to share. this pile values their privacy so pictures aren’t taken with the thought of anyone else in mind, they’re very cherished. i did channel emotional milestones being posted (pregnancy, marriage, moving in, etc.) and i do see their own certified spot on your page (photo dumps, page highlights, name in bio). kinda like a virtual museum of their love to you and your love to them.
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📸 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐭𝐬
❦— them. a potent photo trait is literally your fs lmao, they’re lowkey walking art. something about their facial features or structure are resemblant to a god’s—very pretty people, and we photograph them as such. capturing them from their good angles with the best lighting, it’s flattering. people stop breathing when they see these pictures.
❦— b&w. these are heartwarming pictures, ones that are wholesome enough to frame and hang on the walls. i’m seeing pinkies being intertwined and eskimo kisses, innocence personified. closeups of someone covering their face and hiding their smile, but peeking through their fingers to see the camera cuteee.
❦— work. big thing here, it was mentioned three times. y’all could have an online business together, one that encourages or promotes positivity (self affirmations, fundraisers, products, etc.) it could be popular, there’s succession (passed down thru generations) and a sense of being stable despite y’all being new owners.
there’s also “goodbye” and “big city”, working creates long distance travel which means the time y’all usually spend together gets split in half. someone has to leave frequently and for long periods of time, this in turn creates photo dumps (which are so common here lol) and extra long captions.
❦— hermit mode. take a shot for each time i’ve said something’s cute lmao but this is so cute. so these are pics at home or in comfortable environments, in matching onesies or facial masks. just very big kid vibes, y’all even build pillow forts to sleep in them awww. this is peace and quiet with each other.
❦— phone. i channeled facetime and audio messages, “listen to me.” ya’ll spend hours upon hours on the phone. no matter if it’s meaningful convo or a simple check in, y’all will talk all day until your mouths go dry. taking screenshots of their goofy messages (hilarious btw) while falling asleep on the phone, y’all can’t get enough of each other. this is someone that will listen to and send songs that remind them of you, creating playlists that y’all will listen to together.
❦— landscapes. beautiful views with them, emphasis on beautiful. orange sunsets, mossy green hills, glittered night skies. blooming gardens or snowcapped peaks, nature as a whole is prominent but def within photos. a “secret” code is here; if someone isn’t in the picture entirely, their stuff will be so that we know they’re around. (car keys or a phone, initials in the sand, half-eaten food etc.)
❦— guess what? “we just fucked.” lame i know lmaoooo but this is what y’all do, leave writing on foggy windows or wet handprints against shower glass. it could be wet stains on the bed, bite marks on the thighs—anything goes to snitch on y’all selves tbh. even seeing red scratches across someone’s back, yet they grin with a thumbs up.
❦— nudes. if your person is a male, pictures of their wand are reoccurring. very reoccurring lmao, whether it’s sent from them or taken by you. specifically pictures of your hand wrapped around their wand after they’ve🥛 but there’s videos too, more of the oral part before the finish lmao. this is on the feminine’s phone in particular, she has a hidden folder in her camera roll just for these.
❦— home videos. y’all have beautiful sex together, as in pleasure that’s meant to be on film fr. emotions and passion at an all time high, it’s as if the walls were painted in y’all’s intimacy. “aesthetes.” so much thought and effort are put into the final product—props and low lighting, burning candles, background music. it’s a movie scene, even down to the settings that resemble paintings.
❦— the fool. it’s normal for nsfw pics to happen outside; in nature or in public spaces. wild cards fr, you’ll end up doing it anywhere and everywhere (oral included). no regard for the law or peeping toms either, y’all get too wrapped up in each other care. this is in restrooms, at parking lots, on beaches, etc. just don’t get caught lmao.
end.❤️‍🔥 previous reading
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𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐞𝐞 ✞
🃏queen of cups↺. 6os↺. 5op. 10op↺. 9oc. cleanse and ideation↺.
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i want to mention that i noticed a dime while shuffling—this made me think “a dime a dozen” or “diamond in the rough.” this is on the fs’s part, they put you on a pedestal. you’re a trophy to them, the winning prize, someone that they’re so proud to experience and witness in their everyday glory. no one in the world reminds them of you, you’re indifferent and cherishable. your own person. channeled that this is evident in their eyes—in pictures you’ll notice a glimmer or glint, even the admiration on their face. in awe of all that is you.
these are photos that can’t be shared, ones that are kept secret and stowed under passwords. “your eyes only.” this energy is very secretive, very “shhhh” and it seems to be a double edged sword situation. this pile’s future spouse has an outside relationship, someone they’re involved with despite their attachment to you. it’s shitty because y’all truly have a bomb ass connection but the secrecy behind it overshadows the love. the emperor in retrograde, their control over the situation is a nuance to the issue. the problem lies in their dismissal of reality, life outside of the fantasy they’ve created. pertaining to them leaving their current partner, it’s no negotiation on how or when to do it. they want to leave on their own time, but you’re not a fan of that sentiment because it’s tiring. this person is so matter of fact tho lmao, they say “deal with it or don’t.”
ngl i do see this as possessiveness, but it’s not as terrible as it seems. the circumstance could obviously be better, but as far as their intentions go it’s never out of spite. it sounds confusing because yes this is a love triangle, but truthfully they’re more invested in what y’all have. there’s just no forward action after the fact which screams lack of accountability due to their pride and ego. despite their leo placements (trust me), this person emulates the cowardly lion and his fear of courage, particularly their refusal to come clean and cut ties. with cleanse and ideation being contrasting colors (red and blue i.e. hot and cold), moments of passion turn into missed calls and ghosting. long periods on their end, on and off or up and down, because they don’t want to accept defeat—being in love.
these photos remind me of a mask, one that hides the truth behind wide smiles and kissy faces. it’s a lot going on within this connection and tbh that aspect is more evident than anything in the camera. despite their emotional response to you, i did channel that they have the tendency to forget you’re human lmao. not in a weird disrespectful sense, but that you’re an item they want to keep “all alone and only needing me.” it seems unhinged but again this isn’t with ill intent, it’s a claim for them. “competition” and i’m channeling flavor flav’s dating show—this is an ego (leo) thing for sure because of course this person has insecurities revolving your other options. this is such a situationship lmao but i don’t think it’s all bad, just some major inner reflection is needed. i will say that pile three’s energy was quiet, this seems to be withdrawal from dealing with old patterns and that’s valid.
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📸 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐭𝐬
❦— photobomb. this person is alwaysssss interrupting personal pictures lmao and with no shame too. i’m getting so many random instances of them, nine times out of ten they’ll be in the background of whatever is taken. channeling live photos specifically; you’re posing in the mirror as they walk in to bother you lmao. they start to grab at your waist to give you a kiss, but you’re laughing and squealing instead. they’ll have moments as such, but their gestures are significant (middle fingers, expressive faces, waving at the camera etc.)
❦— scorpio. very sexy, secluded energy is significant. for obvious reasons it’s borderline sneaking around, so the air of enticement is always there. “risqué.” there’s something about the lighting that adds to this dynamic, either lowering brightness or dimming the contrast (me coded) to “seduce” or add mystique. also it just looks better lmao.
❦— three of wands. specific so it’s not for all, but someone in this connection is either bisexual or bi-curious. this could even point to a polygamous or open relationship because i’m seeing threesomes or kissing people of the same sexual orientation. maybe even doing things with this person’s outside connection(s), it was mentioned. this didn’t come off as a photo trait but i still put it in lmao take what resonates.
❦— thin ice. one or the other are using their partner’s state of vulnerability as a quote unquote mindfuck😭 this is when they’re upset (yelling, crying, silent treatment etc). i even see someone sticking up their middle finger as their person spams a bunch of pictures. “aw you mad?” this seems to be the fs’s game of choice and it’s irritating bc sometimes they can’t read the room lmao.
❦— honey. this lands since together y’all seem to be hot and sticky, but turn out sweet at the same time. your person’s teasing and childish antics tie into this too (sticky), they’ll send pictures of things they ordered for you or send money to make up for upsetting you.
❦— hot. honey hot lmaoo don’t unfollow me yet. “turn me on” and “sexy sexy” came out, pretty self explanatory. i could see the energy if anything, y’alls energies are intense af. it’s like looking at porn in the form of a couple, very cunt tbh (i hate myself). sexual innuendos come from this too—grabbing crotches but it’s not in view, peeking at them from under the sheets, biting fingers or being choked.
❦— aquarius. very unserious couple lmaooo (take a shot for each lmao lmao), ya’ll are so silly together. this is milk mustaches, cheek biting, sniffing armpits, clenching butts—literally anything dumb. fun environments or dates that require being active, ones that are out the box or outside comfort zones. rock climbing, bungee jumping, parasailing, rooftop golf, riding atvs etc. veryyy fun pics.
❦— evidence. i didn’t want to include this because i don’t encourage it but we move. whatever pics come out of this specific part, they’re going to be vile. just outright nasty lmao and it’s for a reason. this is def ammunition for the feminine, this is her weapon for those that try to sabotage this relationship out of spite or competition. saved for “rainy days.” this is one leo ass pile😭
❦— aphrodite. because you’re breathtaking, they’ll catch you in the moments of being “free” or at ease. like when you’re getting undressed for a shower or when you’re glowing after great sex. capturing minuscule details that only a lover would notice, they see true beauty even when you aren’t attempting to be.
❦— nudes. the feminine is naughty oooo. “invisible ink.” she’s sending nudes like invitations lmao, but on the occasion that y’all have been separated for too long. wants to show her partner what they’ve been missing, or at least what they can’t have. “look since you can’t touch.” it’ll be torture too lmao, she’s def dolled up and posing in whatever’s sheer to flaunt her goods.
when it comes to sexual media in general, y’all are always on the same page. whenever, wherever, however—it’s always reciprocated because it’s always wanted lmao, it’s exciting and keeps things fun. sexting at work, whispering dirty talk into the phone, masturbation videos before noon etc. admiration of each other’s bodies is here; heart emojis and words of affirmation.
❦— queen of coins. this is value during pleasure, goddess treatment when it comes to bedroom activities. tbh if y’all stared at them long enough it’d just get y’all hot and bothered for more. i’m channeling that your person will dead send money in return for being blessed omg. roleplay and cosplay were mentioned, y’all go shopping for new costumes or items together.
had to mention because it kept reoccurring whenever i edited this specific pile—i kept repeating lmao after certain sentences or wanted to put in dumb shit for comedic presence, and i wanted to be blunt with this pile so bad because y’all felt so bestie. this was so y’all’s fs lmao idk who they are but they’re nothing but jokes, a pure clown at heart. i thought it was cute because i interpreted it as y’all being so connected that even when y’all are far apart y’all are still so close.
end.❤️‍🔥 previous reading
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𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐮𝐫 ✞
🃏5os↺. 2ow↺. 3oc. the hermit. the magician↺. flow↺ and growth.
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off bat it seems that pictures didn’t come into fruition for a while, at least three-five months tops. “no sudden movements.” resistance and ghosting are here, someone is running from the connection out of fear. the hermit card means that they’re scared of stepping outside their comfort zone to take a risk. not even in a negative way it’s just that they’re terrified lmao. this is def bestfriends to lovers but there’s turtle movement around the union coming together—that same someone doesn’t want to ruin the friendship. they don’t know this obviously, but y’all are actually a divine union. “ancient” so this could be souls from a past life coming together again. “grounded as human beings.” this is so slow burn tho lmao i can deadass see a tree starting to grow but in slowww motion.
this person fantasizes heavyyy about taking passionate photos with you, but again y’all are nowhere near that level of commitment yet. pretty sure this reading’s timeline is during the beginning or middle of y’all’s friendship since there’s so many downloads about comfortability and not wanting to mess up. they’re fighting temptation so bad it’s wild lmao, they’ve never felt this strongly about someone—let alone a friend. red hearts are in their eyes whenever you’re near, but they’ll still turn away to avoid facing the truth of their feelings. it’s annoying to them too lmao, queen of cups represents the emotional pull your presence has on them. to be caught up in the depths of inner reflection is so outside themselves and yet here they are.
someone else is involved with the pacing of this connection. the three of cups being pulled is representative as a person or situation outside of y’all, one that they’re incapable of leaving though they’re desperate to. “can’t.” something about being bound (marriage, children, parents, religion etc.) is the reason why. whichever or whatever it is, unfortunately it’s not an easy fix. their energy is obviously the most prominent and that’s because they’re yearning for this idea of becoming more, they just hate that blockages exist and are effective. you’re a literal pleasure to be around, they wish to easily accept and embrace all that you should offer. channeled tupac’s love letter to jada and how he wrote, “you bring me 2 climax without sex.” beautiful ass words from him btw, but in correspondence to your person this is what they’d say about you too. it’s a lot to relish in and it’s prob not obvious, but they do worship the very ground you walk on. admiration, adoration, appreciation in every way possible. honorable mention, your future spouse loves talking to you. general conversation is nice, but y’all peel off the layers of topics that are taboo or undiscussed. the conversation will reach the very ends of the earth just to double back again for more.
didn’t realize until now that pics together weren’t mentioned that much because this person had some things to say instead lmao. it’ll start off discreet, sneaking photos of you from behind or getting them walking past your table. this is cute considering the reading was mainly from fs’s perspective, but you’re the one that’s taking “accidental” pictures of them first. and when this person happens to take “accidental” pictures too, they won’t ever delete them. keepsakes. those accidents soothe the big fat secret crushes y’all have on each other. y’all are literally 🩷 in human form, or puppy love as a couple. very cute like i’m squealing for y’all.
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📸 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐭𝐬
❦— spam. “123” was pulled twice, but instead of countdowns i channeled multiple pictures at once. getting in each other’s faces for the fun of it, catching them off guard or at their “worst” to be silly lol. i see y’all picking out the most embarrassing ones and saving them to y’all’s favorites.
❦— beyoncè. “middle fingers up, put them hands high.” boy do y’all love this gesture lmaooo this is def in almost every pic if not all. i did hear until it’s used with direct intent then the rest of the song came in😭 this is a jab at their on and off behavior, y’all have periods of being beefed out bc of it.
❦— hair. someone’s hair is prominent, could be curly? if not it’s still apart of photos together, it’s even a prop sometimes. very nice hair, bold or beautiful. this is using strands of hair for mustaches or pretending to eat it with wide eyes lmao.
❦— taurus. could be food pics as well, but i channeled netflix and chill vibes. lounging around with y’all’s legs on the other or using chests as pillows. y’all send screenshots of movie favorites (actors and directors, behind the scenes, monologues etc.) or of movie knickknacks. seeing pics at comic-con and animals in character costumes. movie funko pops or figurines too.
❦— venusian. this is someone that will always always always compliment you before, after, or during a picture. if you ask them to take one of you, you’ll notice how fucking long it takes them to do it. i’m seeing them look back and forth, from you to the camera, because “wow you’re real.” gorgeous too. taken aback for sure but they’ll hide it behind witty little remarks. “wow you actually look nice today” but instead it’s the shittiest attempt at hiding what they really want to say.
❦— old friend. waving hello or goodbye, someone is doing this to the other as they come closer or farther away. pictures while they’re walking, seeing small smiles and timid hands. sweet gestures are significant, followed by blushing cheeks or shy eye contact.
❦— baby. this🥹 this is literally y’all’s aesthetic in most pictures. it’s like looking at puppies and kittens, how your whole demeanor goes soft and you can’t stop saying “awww.” tenderness is always there and it’s shown—forehead kisses, tracing noses, wearing each other’s shirts or hoodies, hugs from behind etc.
❦— boobies and more boobies. boobies.
❦— fluids. horrendous ass word but these are pics of 🥛 or 🧃 on each other’s faces. releasing on your lower body, or you’ll get them drenched in yours. if this person has a wand, i’m seeing it lodged in your mouth or being tapped across your cheek. this includes (loud and expressive🤭) self-masturbation on their end as well.
❦— condiments. yessss this is them putting whip cream on your neck to suck it off or pouring syrup into your belly button and licking it out. not food but ice cubes were mentioned too, dragging it along your body or kissing it into your mouth. plus they’re delicate with it. these are vids more than pics, but nonetheless y’all hot af lmao.
❦— lingerie. high quality, as in lace corsets and beaded garters that give off haute couture. getting the vibe of something expensive, and it doesn’t have to be but y’all not wearing nothing cheap lmao. doe or siren eyes in the camera, along with lewd poses and provocative faces.
❦— hotttt. vids of them taking control or dirtying you up real good since they’re on camera🥵 rough and nasty, crying and begging type shit. i’m hearing taunting or a tone of condescendence while they pound harder and deeper wow. very raw and disgusting i love it. choking and spitting even, they’re extremely intense when they want to be and you’re going to love it lmao.
❦— aftercare. capturing each other’s naked bodies, either rubbing against one another or winding down after a round. this is when it’s all said and done, when y’all are out of breath and exhausted from banging each other’s brains out lmao. but it could also be the slower part of intercourse, where y’all still “attached” but it’s coming to an end. bro y’all are hot af😭
end.❤️‍🔥 previous reading
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𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝐟𝐢𝐯𝐞 ✞
🃏5ow. 10ow↺. death↺. 4os↺. 9ow. 2os↺. space and passion.
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starting with the cards space and passion, this pile def has to tiptoe around the concept of taking photos with their fs. whoever they are, there’s disapproval around them being romantically involved with you. channeled “good girl gone bad” and it reminds me of the preacher’s daughter who turned out to be someone different than expected. with death in retrograde, that’s literally what i just said lmao—fated transformation will occur during this person and after. matter of fact, all of the cards in reverse represent the people whom are trying to lure you back into who you “used to be.” these people fear your transformation because they think it’s happening under the circumstance of pleasing your future spouse and not for personal gain. something tells me this is family talking opposed to public influence or nosey exes, and i also feel like you’re without a voice here. people don’t hear you out even when you try to speak up? with the nine of wands, you’re incessantly being put in positions where your beliefs are challenged as an adult, but this could stem from childhood as well. chiron in the 3rd, lillith in the 4th, and mercury in the 12th could be significant.
going back to this person, they give me first vibes. not in the sense of losing virginities or love and heartbreak, but your first sexual awakening. the aura around pictures with them are intense enough to be sexy but the dark and brooding type that’s why i made the assumption of this being the opened door to devotion. this feels like sex magick lmao, you’ll feel bonded to them whether it was before or after the first time. you’ve never been this infatuated before and if you think you have, no you haven’t. this is going to sound lame lmao but y’all’s energy feels like my persona on here, the profile pic and username. kourtney kardash and travis barker are a better example since they’re an actual couple. y’all are like them, not their entire relationship but the aesthetic they share and how in lust they are. don’t hate me either but i’m picking up on how kourtney pretty much changed her whole look to match travis’s vibe, this is that too (don’t do that tho, be yourself baby).
lmao let me again mention that people are pissed at this union like real bad. of course they don’t necessarily matter considering this is your life, but funnily enough they want the best for you. don’t get me wrong, however way they go about expressing this could def be better but the intention isn’t to be assholes. four of swords in retrograde, their thoughts revolve around emotional stability and maturity—you’re too young for them (fs) in terms of naivety. “ticking time bomb.” there’s truth to this tho and ofc you’ll discover why that is once it’s time to. bringing up the nine of wands again, as a whole it turned out be an age gap—your person could be older and it doesn’t have to be a huge ass difference but it’s not subtle lmao. channeled the trope dbf!character x daughter!reader😭 ngl that sums up why there’s so much tsking around y’all being together. y’all better be of legal age, and please careful when old creeps come around because no.
ngl this seems to be a karmic relationship that comes with a profound lesson; don’t get discouraged either, this is going to bring in so much growth as a physical and spiritual being. this is meant to help you transition through life seamlessly, or at least without the mindset of giving up. this lesson seems to be made up of spiritual guidance bordering past wounds (relationship, childhood, generational etc.), a universal test that’ll heal the old and assist the new. you’re kicking people from the past back where they were left at, very intent on standing where your foot lands. beautiful baby, congrats to your future self!
extra notes because i had no space to fit them in with the other paragraphs. as i said earlier, people are against y’all’s connection but it’s not just your family members that try to intercept. “tabloids.” i think your future spouse may be in the public eye? i didn’t pick up on fame in particular, but there’s some type of attention on them that gets put on you. regardless, the situation brings a shitload of haters. it’s weird tbh because people don’t not like you but at the same time they do?😭 “bittersweet” came to mind and that’s replicant of this energy in a way? “you deserve better.” people want to save you from something they don’t think is worth your time, but then want to rub it in your face that they told you so? bro idk who this person is but they are notttt popular, people not fw them at all lmao. it’s negativity around them if anything but i just heard “bad publicity is still publicity”, maybe that image works for them.
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📸 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐭𝐬
y’all must be special irl this pile is so different from the others lol—i didn’t pick up on photo traits but personality traits instead so i went with it. there’s no nsfw section for y’all because i didn’t pick up on that either, however there are four more piles for y’all to choose from!
❦— green eyes. this could be literal green eyes, but i felt more of an envious energy instead. surprise surprise the same people that hate on y’all’s relationship wish it could be theirs. people are jealous of what you’re getting with them, or “earning.” gifts and pretty things for being their spouse, it’s one of those dreams that everyone wants but only few have.
❦— king of wands. daddy warbucks himself, this person is for sure rich af. they’re someone with lots of power, lots of control, lots of fucking money lmao within their career. i don’t get that they’re ceo of wherever they work, but they have enough pull to take trips around the sun and bring you along too. “penthouse views” are included (obvi).
❦— honey. this person def has some seasoning to them, heavy dilf and silverfox vibes around their appearance. seeing a beard, low eyes, maybe even flannel shirts lmao. some of y’all have the twd cast (andrew lincoln, norman reedus, jeffrey dean morgan) and pedro pascal for face references. a rugged daddy basically😂
❦— cherries. maybe this is someone’s favorite fruit? this made me think of the tropics or places similar to the virgin islands. frequent flyer miles, traveling to visit warm beaches and clear coastal waters.
❦— hunter x chaser. this is such forty-year old energy lol it’s charming and that’s what they typically know best. your future spouse def got on your nerves with how much they kept hitting on you😂 not in a weird way, but in a way where they were intent on getting your name. i’m seeing phone number offers and warm smiles, crow’s feet around their eyes too. there is a sense of rejection here, but eventually you cave to their advances.
❦— 22. could be significant to y’all’s age gap, or maybe you’re this age at the time y’all meet. this number made me channel birthdays or special celebrations (anniversary, party, holiday etc). we’re aware of this person’s bank account lmao so it’s no surprise that they’re fond of spending whatever to throw the best whatever. “cover it all.” they’re the type to make things extra special and absolutely perfect for you, no matter the cost.
❦— awakening. this is in regards to you, how being with this person brought a rebirth that ultimately forced you to shed old skin. “Jesus.” major spiritual transitions, regardless of if you believe in higher power or not. this person is the catalyst to writing a new chapter of your life and thriving in it, you’ll be so powerful without the burden of dragging dead weight and opinions. ngl i don’t think your future spouse is meant to be longterm based on how important this transformation is for your story, i think you’ll realize that in the end. “it was fun while it lasted.” you’ll grow and reap your blessings.
end.❤️‍🔥 previous reading
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cowgirlcasanova · 6 months ago
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I made the mistake of clicking on a link to a reddit thread about abigail marston.
the way the men on there talk about her makes me physically feel sick. the names they call her, the way they describe her and john’s relationship, the way they constantly bring up her past in a negative way.
They seem to lack any and all artistic thinking skills. to me, one of the main points of media and art is how you’re supposed to analyze and discover the things they aren’t outright said. You have to dig a little deeper, you have to actually think. The people on that godforsaken website seem to just not have/be able to do that!
abigail was a prostitute. yes, we all know this men of reddit and it’s okay! please shut up about it!!!!
she was also an orphan, even worse for the time, an orphaned girl. she had little to no opportunities in the world she was born into. EVEN JOHN KNOWS THIS. “she’s a woman in a man’s world” and they act personally offended on johns behalf. john was an orphan too, i can promise you he understands how hard it is to survive and he doesn’t look down on her! Not that it even begins to matter if john or anyone else “understands” her reasoning for her choice of survival. It doesn’t. it simply matters that abigail was incredibly strong throughout that time of her life and rest. she survived and did whatever she could to and that is to be appreciated.
These men seem to have this one single idea that “abigail was prostitute so john thought baby not his cause so many men 🤓” SHUT. UP. no actually that was so much more actually john not ready to be a father and being afraid of himself!!!! honestly speaking, the entirety of that situation has very little to do with abigail herself. but no they’ll never understand that because it was written out in black and white and you may have to think a little to get to that conclusion. not to mention, they could never accept it because then john marston wouldn’t be as “alpha” BE QUIET IM BEGGING YOU.
the way they discuss abigail and uncle made my skin crawl. there is nothing else said about that relationship, there is no one specific cannon explanation as to how or why they knew each other. but the men i saw discussing it said such disgusting and vulgar things about how uncle “reallyyy knew abigail”. truly horrifying. There’s so many different ways they could’ve crossed paths. she was a prostitute but that’s not all she was. she was still a woman, a person. i can assure you she had other hobbies and activities that she did, that she enjoyed doing.
not to mention how it seems to be such an odd and disgusting fantasy for them that “everyone in the gang had abigail” i hate to break it to you but no they didn’t! Now this is up for debate for a lot of people and i actually want to make an entire post just dedicated to this. When looking at both instances where that was said, it was purposely said to hurt john and throw him off. not to mention, abigail was never around when it was said. There wasn’t an instance of anyone saying it in camp or even throwing an insult to john about it in rdr2. hmmm i wonder why that is????? Bill said it to make him stumble and dutch said it because he knows john and he knows how to hit him where it hurts. But, i don’t think any of it is true. of course no internet bro is going to actually think into enough to even be curious so!
abigail marston is someone to be admired. someone who persevered as much as any man in that gang but she doesn’t get the same appreciation. she probably had to work just as hard if not harder than some of the men just to stay alive in her youth. Abigail marston is not a nag, she’s not annoying, she’s not “mean” to john. take a step back and look at what she’s responding to and give her the same grace you give arthur and john. “oh well arthur just had a hard time showing emotions because of the way he was raised” “oh john couldn’t deal with everything so he ran away for a little bit it’s okay.” let abigail have that same grace.
so sorry this was not meant to be this long. clearly it has been nagging at me. if you read this love you and love abigail marston!
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luvrodite · 6 months ago
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JASON X F!READER [14.8K]
synopsis. the room, at a glance, looks like it would belong to a beloved child. you smile at the massive bookcase that spans nearly an entire wall, the toys neatly arranged in their chest. a pair of matching hand prints are stamped into the white trim of the windowsill, matching the paint of the wall, one much smaller than the other. the only problem, you realise when bruce crosses the room, is that the room is devoid of an inhabitant. 
content warning. fem!reader, inspired by The Boy (2016), dark content, horror, extreme dubcon, non consensual voyeurism, violence, death, blood, masturbation, piv sex, unprotected sex, creampie please let me know if you feel i've missed any tags
additional note. idk i’m trying my hand at something new but also this isn’t for everyone and that is OK! please don’t read if you’re not interested in the above tags and remember that you curate your own internet experience. peace and love.
minors and blank blogs do not interact, you will be blocked. please have your age in your profile
read on ao3
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You see the notice when you need it the most. Seeking Household Manager/Nanny for Child, written in small bold letters on the corner of your friend’s open newspaper. You’re glad then, for their insistence on subscribing to the papers of surrounding cities, the Gotham Gazette something akin to a beacon of hope when you nearly topple over yourself to reach for the issue and scan the ad. When they’ve saved the glass of wine you nearly knocked over, their eyebrows furrow into a disdainful frown. 
“You’re not seriously considering that.”
You look up from the black and white print, breathless. Immediate start. 9 to 6 weekdays. Boarding and meals provided.  “It isn’t like I’ve got that many other options.”
They grimace, leaning over to skim the print. “It’s in Gotham. You’re just asking to get robbed, at the very least. Have you ever even looked after a kid?”
The double digits in your bank account weigh on you, the suitcases that have been pushed into their storage closet. The couch that’s served as a bed for the past month has begun to mold itself to the shape of your body – and isn’t that a humiliating thought, for how much had been spent on it, it deserves more than for its primary purpose to be housing a poor girl. Your friend sits beside you, clad in thousands of dollars worth of clothing and sneers at what’s beginning to look like the only option you have.
You push down the urge to bite back, eyeing them pointedly instead. “I can’t afford to be picky. Besides, I’ve babysat my cousins before. It’ll be fine.”
.
.
.
The semester is well underway when you get the email, midterms that you haven’t so much as glanced at closely approaching and about a dozen other things to do that threaten to break you into hives when you linger on it for too long. A Mr Bruce Wayne confirms that you’re fit for the job, and he looks forward to meeting you. You stare at the cracked screen of your phone until the letters begin to blur into one another, feeling the rising lump in your throat. A dinner party goes on around you, all friends of friends who you’ve never exchanged more than a few words with. They don’t miss you when you slink away to the bathroom to cry, relief pulling the stopper of your emotions free.
Not wasting any time, the car comes for you early in the next morning and your friend sees you off, massively hungover and raising a hand as you pile the meagre collection of your belongings into the trunk. You are grateful to be rid of the townhouse, and in truth you think they are glad to be rid of you – a month and then some of their poor, Poor, border taking up space on their couch. It’s an unkind thought, fueled by the bitter humiliation of your failure – they’d not complained once, unthinkingly, unhesitatingly opening their door to you when the job you’d been relying on to (barely) make ends meet had let you go and your roommate had quit on you not a week later. 
The stress of it all lulls you into sleep as the car pulls away from the city, cement grey turning to green and rolling farmland. You’re too drowsy to appreciate any of it, and you’re out before you even leave the state. 
You wake from your dreamless sleep, startling at the sound of screeching metal. A wrought iron gate pulls open slowly, disused hinges whining loudly. It feels as though an eternity passes before the car is able to pass through, and the hair on the back of your neck stands on end when you cross the threshold, eyes drinking in the secluded land around you. Gravel crunches under the tires as you drive down a private road, lined on both sides by looming oak trees. Through the gaps, you catch a glimpse of the wide stretch of land that makes up the Wayne estate.
The chill of the morning has travelled with you, it seems. A thin cloak of mist hangs in the air, painting all it touches in wide strokes of silvery grey. Through bleary eyes, you take it all in. The car turns a corner and you duck your head to peer through the windshield, a large manse coming into view suddenly, only growing bigger the closer you get. 
It looms over you when you come to a stop, blotting out the already pale autumn sunlight. Here, everything is tinged in a light blue film, forever suspended in twilight despite the early afternoon hour – the sun isn’t due to set for another few hours but you half expect the moon to be hanging in the sky when you step out of the car.
Sleep softened and weary from the journey, you stretch your limbs, trying to regain some of the feeling after sitting for so long. Your legs feel static-y and you’re conscious as the front door opens and the face of your employer comes into view, of the wrinkles in your clothing. Discreetly, you smooth a hand over the hem of your shirt, but it only folds back after your palm passes over it.
“Mr Wayne,” you greet when the man comes to a stop in front of you. 
It’s difficult to mask your surprise. For all that you’d spent the better part of the last few weeks emailing him, you hadn’t expected someone so...old. He looks a great deal older than a man nearing his fifties, raven hair streaked with thick locks of silver and exhaustion lining an aged face. You feel a pang of sympathy.
“Hello. I hope the journey up wasn’t too bad?” He turns his attention to the driver, who has begun to lift your things out of the car, eyes creasing kindly at the corners and an awkward smile lifting his mouth. “You can just take those on inside, thank you.”
“I can’t complain,” you tell him easily. I wasn’t awake enough to. “You’ve got a beautiful home.”
“Ah, thank you,” he mutters, glancing back over his shoulder at the house. Upstairs, a window is open, and the curtain flutters through, white fabric rippling in the air. “Come on inside, we’ve got a lot to get through before I have to leave.”
You pause at the doorway. “You’re leaving tonight?”
He hums. “Unavoidable, I’m afraid. You’ll have to forgive me.” He offers no further explanation and you’re too tired to press.
He runs you through the basics – emergency contacts, the local police department’s number – as he takes you through a number of rooms on the lower floor. In the living room, as he’s telling you about the fair distance to the town, your attention snags on the portrait hanging over the mantle.
It’s a large thing, set in a gilded frame with a small plaque below it. It dates to a little over a decade ago, and you look up to the subjects of the painting. Of the two faces, you recognise only one and it takes a few seconds to register. Bruce, much, much younger, stands for the portrait with an easy smile curving his mouth. The only wrinkles to be found are those that frame his eyes. He’s handsome, you think, stunned, with an old movie-star kind of charm, blue-black hair and pearly grin. It’s a stark difference from the man that stands next to you now, lacking all the heaviness that clouds over him now.
There’s a little boy in the painting, too. You draw closer, curious. Bright blue eyes, almost blazing, stare back at you, a soft, sweet face that offers a toothy smile.
You’re ushered into the next room before you can get a closer look, but the date lingers with you. What could have happened in such a short amount of time, you think, to cause such a change? Ten years had passed, yes, but the age in your employer’s face spoke of a greater, age old haunting.
You are finally led, after a labyrinthine tour through the manor and its various rooms, to the bedroom of your charge. 
Something, you aren’t quite sure what, tips you off before you even open the door. It might be the sudden tense set to Bruce’s shoulders, hiking up nearly imperceptibly as he reaches for the doorknob, or the tremble in his voice he disguises with a cough. 
“Jason,” he murmurs, “is eager to meet you.”
“I’m looking forward to meeting him, too,” you say slowly, and he steps through the threshold.
The room, at a glance, looks like it would belong to a beloved child. You smile at the massive bookcase that spans nearly an entire wall, the toys neatly arranged in their chest. A pair of matching hand prints are stamped into the white trim of the windowsill, matching the paint of the wall, one much smaller than the other.
The only problem, you realise when Bruce crosses the room, is that the room is devoid of an inhabitant. 
He turns and you freeze when you take in the mass in his arms.
“Jaylad, come say hello.”
Pale, porcelain and unmoving, a doll stares back at you from its perch in your employer’s arms. Its likeness is a mimicry of the boy in the painting, a manufactured blush painting its cheeks in soft rose, dull blue eyes lacking the vibrancy of the portrait. It unnerves you, staring at it, and you look back and forth between Bruce and the thing but the former remains steady, expectant.
You raise a trembling hand, fingers clasping one small hand in greeting – it’s barely bigger than a pre-schooler, and even smaller in your arms when he deposits in your arms. 
(It takes every ounce of your strength not to flinch at the press of cool ceramic against your skin.)
Whether this is a sick joke or some awful scheme, your situation takes time to reveal itself. Bruce addresses the thing as though it were flesh and blood and you follow, uncertain and stilted. Rising unease makes it difficult to look at the thing properly, and you trail after Bruce back downstairs cradling it stiffly. 
It begins to piece itself together easily enough when on your way out of Jason’s bedroom, you catch sight of various photographs littering the surface of the walls and end tables, Bruce and a very real boy with bright blue eyes. It’s easy then, to understand what has happened, and what is being asked of you. Your discomfort softens, if only slightly, making way for sympathy. 
You know loss. Death is no stranger to you. The grief of losing a child – it feels cruel to fault your employer for how he’d chosen to cope. Soft-hearted, your chest aches when you catch the lingering of his gaze on the photographs as you pass them in the hall. So dearly loved, it’s no wonder the death of his son had driven him to...this. 
Still, you wonder whether this is right, to take money from him like this. It feels as though you’ve taken advantage of this man, accepting to live in his house and eat his food in return for services that wouldn’t come to be.
But the emptiness of your wallet stings like a phantom lash, the desperation of your situation weighs on you and you close your mouth. 
Bruce takes your leave almost immediately after your tour concludes. You stand on the front steps with the doll in your arms, a puppet held like a toddler on your hip, and watch him pile into a sleek black car.
“If you need anything,” he says, “they’ll take care of you in town.”
Something in your consciousness snags on the tightness in his voice, something that’s just out of reach, a note you can’t quite make out. His eyes flicker down to the mass in your arms and you follow his gaze. There is nothing you find, the black of the doll’s sweater unruffled, the manufactured flush of his rosy cheeks still cool to the touch – still porcelain. It has not suddenly gained the weight and warmth of a real child.
“Jason’s a good boy. He won’t give you too much trouble,” Bruce murmurs. 
When you look up, you catch the comet tail of a funny look, winking out of existence before you can see it properly. It triggers a crawling sensation on the back of your neck that you try to tamp down. Grief is all it is. You chalk it up to grief.
He takes your leave, then, piling into his car with a brief goodbye to the doll. A cloud of dust kicks up behind him and by the time it settles, the car has vanished.
The doll remains tucked in its bed in the hours that follows your employer’s departure, and once or twice you’ll peer into the room, tugged by an invisible string towards the empty bedroom to make sure you haven’t dreamt it all. But every time you open the door, there it lies, porcelain and so very still. 
You take the rest of the evening to explore the house – properly this time, lingering in the various rooms of this huge home. Part of you wonders how you’ll manage to keep the place tidy. You’re no neat freak, but it seems a herculean task for one person to manage the entire household. Dust amasses easily, and you eye the high ceilings of each floor critically – how on earth are you meant to get up there?
You file it away as a worry for later, drifting in and out of rooms. An office, untouched, down the hall from your room with a sturdy, mahogany desk and large window which offers you a view of the estate. Guest rooms on guest rooms, white tarp covered furniture and slightly stale air. You find the library after a few turns, drawing closer to a table stacked with books. 
They’re well loved, each with a child’s scrawling handwriting in the front cover. Property of Jason Peter Todd. 
It sends a pang through you and you pick up the books, flipping through them absentmindedly. It’s fairly advanced for a younger child, you think. One of them piques your interest and when you leave the room a little while later, it’s with the hardcover in your hands.
Your first night in the manse is restless. The house is old. Every so often, the bones of the place snap and crack, shuddering under a great weight. You curl further into the heavy blankets of your bed, willing your burning eyes to close but the nap on the way up has left you unable to sleep. You let out a frustrated sigh, a hand smacking against the sheets before you push yourself up to sit against the headboard and switch on the bedside lamp. From where you sit, the mirror in the corner of the room shines your reflection back at you, a soft orange diffusing through the room. 
Down the hall, another snap of the foundations. You shiver, and reach for the book, opening the cover to the name scribbled inside. The clock on your phone reads a bright 2:43 and you flip the page.
To Mrs. Saville, England. St. Petersburgh, Dec. 11th, 17—. You will rejoice to hear that no disaster has accompanied the commencement of an enterprise which you have regarded with such evil forebodings. I arrived here yesterday, and my first task is to assure my dear sister of my welfare and increasing confidence in the success of my undertaking...
Dawn comes in slow breaths, the world swallowed in a cool, blue mist as the sky begins to lighten. You have long since succumbed to your fatigue, the pages of your borrowed book splayed open against your sheets and eyes closed to the world. The shadows lengthen on the floor, the house echoes, groans, and sunlight slips in through the gaps in your curtains. 
Still, you sleep.
.
.
.
The schedule that Bruce leaves you with is left on the table in Jason’s room, a sheaf of papers detailing his day at length – when he is to take his breakfast, lunch and dinner, when you are to sit down with him for his lessons. 
There are more pressing things that hold your attention – namely, the matter of your coursework. 
When you wake the following day, it is a little after noon and you curse when you realise you’ve slept half the day away. The list of things to do hasn’t grown any shorter in your search for a job. In fact, when you sit down at the desk in the office with your laptop and connect to the internet – poor, laggy – it only seems to have grown exponentially. 
You spend most of the day holed up there, staring at the screen of your laptop as you try to catch up, typing out notes upon notes until your eyes burn and the emptiness of your stomach is too hard to ignore. In the kitchen, you assemble a plate of what you can find. Cold cuts of meat, cheese in the fridge that seems edible, bread slathered in butter, a few slices of fruit.
It isn’t a proper meal, but it tides you over until dinner, when you wander out of the study to root through the butler’s pantry and put together a simple bowl of pasta. 
You eat alone in the kitchen, sitting at the island and staring at the grooves in the counter-top. The silence presses in on all sides of you and not even scrolling through social media, of which a limited number of posts actually deign to load, distracts you from the stillness of it all. For some reason the tinny sound of your music, filtering through your wired headphones, isn’t enough either. 
Dinner is a short affair, before you return to your work. 
It’s a gradual thing, the building anxiety in your gut. The loneliness and late hour are no friends of yours and the tottering pile of coursework threatens to topple over, crushing you beneath a mountain of assigned readings and lectures. The world had not waited for you to get your shit together, and midterms had crept up on you before you could blink.
It isn’t the time for panic. You stave it off when the anxiety simmering in your cells threatens to boil over, willing your tears away. The third cup of coffee at your desk side has grown cold, and the espresso tastes bitter when you bring the mug to your mouth, clinging to your tongue like film. 
You get back to bed well into the evening, too exhausted to shower the day off. It’s all you can do to let out a few bitter tears before unconsciousness claims you, a distant throbbing in your head that you ignore in favour of sleep.
how is it out there? haven’t heard from you since you left, just checking in you get there okay? let me know
The texts on your phone are responded to in a perfunctory manner – yes, everything’s fine. talk 2 u soon. very busy !! – before you shove it into a drawer and return to your work.
You think the isolation must be getting to you when things begin to go missing.
It’s easy to grow lonely out here, you realise on the third day when you pick up your phone to message a friend and the connection is so bad your texts barely go through. A rare break from your work, you curl up in the window seat of your bedroom and thumb through the photos on your camera roll. Faces you haven’t seen, fond memories of nights out and shared experiences – your old life seems farther away from you than ever, and part of you is a little bitter that it’s only the case for you. 
out for G’s bday!!! we miss u text u when im home?
Accompanying those texts are photos – they take an age to load, of course, but when they finally do, your eyes burn with jealousy at the wide, drunken grins, carefree and happy. 
It seems especially cruel to you that fate would deal you such a poor hand in comparison to those around you. The girls you love – whose circle you’d once been part of, young, privileged enough to be reckless – get to reel through their lives without a care. Here you were, miles away from anyone else, a grand total of fifty dollars to your name and with only a fucking doll for company. 
Envious, self loathing and miserable, you don’t reply to the messages.
You try to reason that you’ll get to it later, that you have work to do, that the house only seems to grow wider and lonelier around you. 
Work. 
You fling your phone to the side, pressing your hands to your face and letting out a heavy breath. It clatters against the floor with a dull thud and you can already imagine the newest addition to your screen’s collection of hairline fractures. 
You file it away – just another thing you don’t have time for.
Back in the study, you sit down at the desk, only to stop short. Where your pen and notebook had been, outlining your midterm paper, the ballpoint is nowhere to be seen. You peer over the edge of the desk, ducking your head underneath, but there’s no sight of it. You’re certain you’d left it just there, atop the paper. 
It’s innocuous enough that you forget about it, coming up with a replacement when you rifle through the drawer of the desk. The thought leaves your mind when you return to your work, new, blue ink crossing out black to scribble notes in the margins. It’s not a loss you mourn – or notice – much. 
Your bracelet, however, preceded by the vanishing of your clothes, is. 
A pair of jeans, your underwear and a shirt had been folded on the counter only twenty minutes ago when you’d entered the bathroom to take a shower. Now, clad in only your towel, you stare at an empty spot and feel something like fear prickle over your skin. 
Blood rushes in your ears the longer you remain in place – for what, you have no idea. Perhaps willing your things to return in between blinks, assure you that it had only been a trick of the light, or that the caffeine and stress had gotten to you.
No such luck. Your belongings do not reappear and the longer you remain in the bathroom, the more you feel like a sitting duck, like soft-bellied prey waiting to be caught. 
You venture out of the bathroom timidly, clutching the front of your towel. The floor is cold under your bare feet and you suck in a breath, trying to remain quiet. The house is quieter than usual, it feels like, when you peer carefully out into the hall. There is no sign of any disturbance, no sound from the lower levels or any of the surrounding rooms. 
The closed door of your bedroom is much more ominous than it ought to be. You stare at it for a long time, heart in your throat, before you reach for the doorknob with shaky hands.
A soft, scared noise leaves your throat before you can reel it in. Your room has been nothing short of ransacked, clothes and other belongings strewn about your bed and the floor. There isn’t an inch of it that hasn’t been left unturned, drawers pulled out, trunk at the foot of your bed sprung open, the fucking covers pulled back. You step further into the room, horror only growing as you spin slowly, taking it in. 
Somewhere down the hall, something clatters and your blood turns to ice in your veins. You whirl back to the open door and lunge forward to slam it shut, breath rattling in your chest as you fumble with the locks on it, palms sweaty and fingers trembling so badly you fear it’ll sweep open on you before you can latch it. Water drips into the carpet at your feet when you finally lock the door and back away, trembling lips pulling downwards. 
Fear blurs your vision in saltwater, slipping down your cheeks when the sound of laughter filters through the walls, a soft, child-like, playful sound that only drives you further backwards, a scream spilling from your lips when you bump into the post of your bed, the wood pressing against your back unexpectedly and startling you. 
“Please...” You don’t know what you’re pleading for, or who to. Tears stream down your damp face, and your breath hitches, stuttering over a sob when the shadows in the hall shift, the gap underneath the door showing movement right outside your door. 
And then – so sweetly, so softly you wonder if you’ve heard it wrong – your name.
You begin to cry in earnest then, taking in big, shuddering breaths that wrack through your body. Crouching, you press your hands to your face, sobbing louder when the voice continues – 
“Please come out, I promise I’ll be good.”
Your scream catches in your throat, turning into a spluttering cough when the door knob rattles slightly before stilling. You watch through teary eyes, snivelling, as the shadows move once more and then, as if it had never happened, the house falls into silence once more.
It takes a while for you to move from your spot on the floor, to relax your frozen muscles and pull yourself up, clinging to the banister of your bed to steady yourself. Snot and salt smeared across your face, you keep your eyes on the thin gap beneath the door, the small, solid mass in the centre of it.
You must be going crazy. The isolation must be getting to you. It’s the only reasonable explanation you can procure when you open the door and find your clothes in a clumsily folded pile, the metal of your bracelet glinting amongst the folds of fabric. Holding a hand to your head, you slump against the door frame, feeling the energy leave your body. 
“Fuck.”
It takes you a long time to clean up your room, pulling on your clothes with an eye kept on the door and returning your things to their places. Nothing is broken, but you don’t know whether you should be thankful for it. The house continues to breathe as it had before, the structure settling back into place after letting whatever had been outside your door loose. You don’t leave your room for the rest of the night.
Daylight returns some of your courage to you. You venture outside, clutching the end of a pair of scissors as a safeguard. You don’t know how much damage they’re actually capable of, meant for cutting through first aid dressings and fabric, the blade barely an inch long – but it feels comforting that you aren’t empty handed.
In his bedroom, where you had last left the Doll, you do not find it. Even the sunlight streaming through the gauzy curtains isn’t enough to fully shield you from your unease. You look all over the room, pushing aside the curtains, peering under the bed, but it isn’t there. 
The afternoon you had planned to spend studying is wasted away on a hunt for the thing. You check each of the surrounding rooms, first, before moving to the upper floors. In each, all that greets you is a thick layer of dust, white tarp and the smell of long undisturbed air. It grips you, the intense need to locate the doll. You cannot place anything beyond this feeling, only that you must find it.
In a downstairs office – what you assume serves as Mr Wayne’s study – you find, curiously, a few papers scattered over the edge of his desk. At first you are too preoccupied to pay it any mind, instinctively crouching to pick them up and arrange it. Your mind remains fixated on the task at hand. 
Chance, or perhaps the machinations of fate, pulls your sight to the bright, bold print on the paper in your hand and you process the text belatedly, stilling on the floor.
GOTHAM GAZETTE Wayne Heir Found: Body Recovered From Tragic Blast  Alexander Knox The body of Jason Todd, aged 10, was discovered yesterday after a blast in central Gotham that killed at least 200. The Gotham City Police Department is currently reporting this as a “tragic accident.”  Jason Todd is survived by his father, Bruce Wayne, who currently holds the position of CEO of Wayne Enterprises, and older brother Richard Grayson. He is remembered by his classmates and teachers as a “bright soul, with boundless potential, who was taken too soon.” The GCPD are working together with the Gotham City Fire Department in responding to this incident. As of this morning, Rescue and Recovery teams have made progress through 75% of the fallout zone and are continuing to do so.  Civilians are reminded to keep clear of the area until recovery efforts have been finalised. In remembrance of Jason’s life, the family asks that any charitable donations be made to the Catherine Todd Recovery Centre.
The photos of the fallout that accompany the article make your throat tighten, staring at the grey of a destroyed city block, smoking rubble and dark stains seeping from beneath cracked cement. The faded edges of the paper, the deep creases where it had been folded and unfolded – your heart twists painfully in your chest at the thought that Bruce had kept this reminder in here, all these years. 
It lingers with you long after you exit the room, searching for the doll with a slightly muddled mind. You’d known, of course, that his son had died – but you think of the violence of it all, how abruptly he’d been ripped from him. It settles in your chest uncomfortably, making a home for itself in the space beneath your sternum and pressing down on your oesophagus as you move through the house.
When you finally chance upon the doll – sat upright in plain sight in the downstairs sitting room – you pause a few feet away. The fear of last night’s incident clings to you, but with that is something else, the makings of a theory you haven’t quite gotten to, another, foreign feeling that outweighs your fear, tempers it into something malleable. You scrutinise the porcelain face, drawing closer slowly until you come to a stop in front of the armchair you’d been lounging in only yesterday.
Crouching, you stare into dull glass eyes. They remain lifeless, forever affixed on nothingness, unmoving. You pass a hand over it.
“Was it..” you hesitate, feeling acutely aware that you’re talking to an inanimate object, and half expecting an answer. You whisper, “Was it you, last night?”
There is no answer. Of course there isn’t. Still, you stare a moment longer, before your gaze slides over to the leaf of paper that’s tucked beneath it’s leg – the schedule of rules you’re meant to abide by in Bruce’s absence.
You look back up to the doll. 
.
.
.
You’ve bowed to the pressure of your isolation and gone mad, you think absently as you sink a knife into the flesh of an apple. Clumsily cut, you arrange the slices onto a plate in the kitchen and slide it onto the small table where you’ve sat the doll. You lean forward until you’re level with it, and narrow your eyes.
“Is it you?” you ask again. Silence hangs in the air of the kitchen and you begin to feel a little hopeless, clinging to this half-formed idea. 
You stand and turn, taking a few steps forward into the butler’s pantry but the sound of footsteps makes you whirl around, heart in your throat. The doll remains in place, but – the plate is empty. You draw in a shaky breath, moving closer. 
“What the fuck. What the fuck.” Your hands tremble as you peer around the kitchen, eyeing the closed door. It’s implausible that anyone might have moved in such a short space of time without your noticing – you’re the only one in the room. 
You try once more, this time without turning around, keeping your gaze fixed on the doll as you slide a plate of toast in front of him. It’s covered in a thin smear of hazelnut spread, the chocolate melting over the warm bread.
The doll does not move. 
Your brows draw together, confused. A few beats. The toast is cooling, and a silly, superficial part of you worries that it won’t taste any good if this goes on any longer.
“Are you shy...?” you wonder out loud. The doll does not answer you but you turn away slowly anyway, fixing your eyes on the back door.
A second passes, and then another. You wait. 
You feel it then, a few moments later, rather than hear it. It’s difficult to place, the manner in which the very atmosphere in the kitchen shifts, to let you know you are no longer the only one in here. There is the rustle of something moving, the bread, you think, and then it recedes entirely without a sound. 
You wait a few beats before you turn, and your breath punches out of you in a rush when you note the once again empty plate. Disbelieving, you laugh.
“Holy shit.” Rounding the table, you pick up the doll, handling its weight much more carefully as you hold it out in front of you. “It was you, then, last night. You know, if you wanted my attention, you’ve got a funny way of showing it, kid. I think I lost ten years of my life with that little stunt.”
The threat seems to abate, after that, when you consider it. The spirit of a lonely child tugs at your poor heartstrings, and when you open your bedroom door after your evening shower to find a clumsily arranged sandwich, it only softens you further. You go to check on the doll – on Jason – and find him sat in bed, his schedule next to him once again. 
“So this is what you want, hm?” you mutter under your breath, scanning the paper. Your lips tug downwards into a pout, and you reach out to fix his hair. “Poor thing. You must be bored out here, with no one else to play with.”
He doesn’t say anything, but you find you already know the answer.
Rules 1. No Guests 2. Never Leave Jason Alone 3. Save Meals in Freezer 4. Never Cover Jason’s Face 5. Read a Bedtime Story 6. Play Music Loud 7. Clean the Traps 8. Jason is Never to Leave 9. Kiss Goodnight
You bring him almost everywhere with you after that. 
There’s a shift in your mind after your discovery, a distinction that shifts the doll into Jason. You’re able to rest a little easier now, knowing what had been behind the disturbances, and that it wasn’t something you had to fear. He sits comfortably in a chair next to you in the study, keeping you company as you return to your studies, worries that you’d been dealing with something more nefarious comfortably assuaged. 
You learn to communicate with him, in your own shared way. The music you play as you study is no longer isolated to your headphones, but filters through the speakers of your laptop as you work. When you begin making your own offhand remarks to him, you don’t know, but as the hours pass it feels less like you’re unaccompanied and more like you’re studying with a friend. Every so often, there is a sign – a tap, or the roll of something on the floor outside the study – that signals you to take a break, pushing away from the desk to take a turn about the room with Jason in your arms. 
Once, during a longer break, you bring him along on a walk outside. He doesn’t seem to like it very much – hiding your notebook until you figure it out. And you suppose spirits don’t require much exercise, so you let it be, content to take quick trips to the kitchen for snacks. You keep it for after the day is over, right before the sun sets, stretching your legs as you walk around the gardens before dinner.
Before you’ve realised, you’ve built a camaraderie with Jason. It’s easy for you to confide in him, slumping back in your desk chair with your hands pressed to your face. Tonight, the amount of coursework seems, not for the first time, never-ending. Tears streak through your fingers as you quietly sob.
“I’m so tired,” you cry, and a little hiccup stutters out of you. “It’s so...it’s just unfair. None of this would’ve happened if I’d – if I wasn’t so busy trying to look for a place.”
You work yourself up, tears smearing against the deep hollows beneath your eyes – despite how comfortable your bed is, lately you’ve still been working late into the night, long after you put Jason to sleep with a kiss to his brow. Though the night is young enough that you won’t have to tuck Jason in for a while, it still presses on you. There is too much to do, and not nearly enough time. 
“It’s not fair,” you mumble again, weakly. You slide a look over to Jason through swollen eyes, pressing your cheek against your knees. “Everyone else gets to – they get to not care about money and they get to enjoy their lives. It’s just...not fair.”
You close your eyes, hiding your face in the fabric of your leggings. Your head feels congested, after crying so much, heavy, and stuffed with wool. A few minutes later, as you’re working up the will to return to your work, you hear a thud. 
When you look up you find an apple on the corner of the desk, bright red and freshly washed, if the few drops of water that cling to it are anything to go by. The sight makes you burst into fresh tears again, a kindness that feels too tender for your poor, bruised heart. You reach for the fruit, feeling the juice run down your wrist when you sink your teeth into its flesh. Mumbling a thank you, you feel, for the first time since your arrival, your hopelessness begins to flicker out.
.
.
.
A crash wakes you in the middle of the night, startling you from your sleep with a jolt. At first, you think it might be Jason. You groan quietly, rolling over into the pillow with a grumble of his name before you sit up and shove the covers off. It’s particularly freezing tonight and you reach for a robe as you shuffle over to your bedroom door only to stop short when, through the walls, floating up from the lower floors, you hear voices.
Your blood turns to ice in your veins and you register the shattering of something downstairs. In the moments that follow, you barely think, flying down the hall to where Jason’s bedroom is and clutching him close to your chest. All the while, the racket downstairs grows louder, raucous bickering and jeering laughter nipping at your heels as you push into a spare room and slip into the depths of a wardrobe. 
You kick yourself when you realise you haven’t brought your phone, the landline in Jason’s room being too far out of reach now to dial the local police. You can only press yourself further into the wardrobe, cradling Jason with a hand on the back of his head like you might your own child – like he shouldn’t have to bear witness to the violence enacted on his home. Tears – how many have you spent since your arrival, it must be enough to fill an ocean – slip onto your collar and you hide in a case that smells of mothballs, the fur of old coats brushing against your arms and face. 
“It’s going to be okay,” you whisper, feeling half crazed as you comfort Jason. “We’re going to be okay.”
It’s the longest night of your life, waiting for them to leave. Even without you leaving a crack in the wardrobe door, the noise from downstairs would have reached you. It’s jumbled in your fear-addled mind, but you hear the shatter of glass and yelling – they break out into arguments amongst themselves. You can’t make out the words, but it carries the threat of further violence – the kind that goes beyond stolen valuables and broken glassware. 
And then, abruptly, you think you hear a whisper of something, before it all falls still.
The darkness in the wardrobe is stifling but you remain there, clutching Jason with your head bowed until you hear a shout announcing the presence of the police. 
It’s only when the Commissioner announces himself, climbing to the second floor of the manor and stepping into the room, that you crawl out from the wardrobe. You’re shaking when he steps forward to meet you, arms coming around you to help you stand.
You’re coaxed into a blanket and ushered into a chair as they question you – the tiles of the kitchen floor are freezing under your bare feet and you wince when you catch the looks his deputies share amongst themselves. You must look like a mess, tear tracks drying on your face and cradling a doll in your arms. 
There’s a look in the Commissioner’s eyes, as he questions you, that makes the hair on the back of your neck raise – you forget about it quickly enough when he presses further, but later you’ll recall it. There’s a lack of surprise in his gaze, as though he hadn’t expected any less. You figure he’s hardened by his profession. Still, it lingers in the recesses of your mind.
They clean it up quick enough, and they leave right as the sun begins to creep over the horizon. You see them off, standing on the front steps with a shock blanket wrapped around your shoulders and Jason in your arms. When the last of the car headlights fade out of sight, you turn back inside.
You venture into the living room, staring at where the sunlight catches on a stray shard of glass, scuffs on the floor where heavy boots had tracked mud in on the hardwood. The lingering smell of peroxide – all that it suggests had happened here – makes you let out a shaky breath, clutching Jason closer.
You know it then, what – who had kept you safe. And if there were any lingering doubts about him, they dissolve under your tongue. The solid weight of the mass in your arms is an anchor, grounding you, reminding you. Safe. You’re unharmed, you’re okay. The intrusion is gone, it’s just the both of you now. You turn your head, pressing your mouth to his hairline. It’s cold beneath your lips as you whisper, a tear carving a path down your cheek. 
“Thank you, Jason.” 
.
.
.
After the intrusion things, mercifully, begin to settle. You’re glad for it, sure you’ve fulfilled your share of excitement for the next decade. You return to your and Jason’s routine, rebuilding your shattered safe space with every album you introduce him to and each portion of coursework you complete. Brick by brick, you patch the rift. 
The evening you finally feel as though you’ve begun to make headway, you turn to him, overjoyed, patting his hand excitedly.
“I think we deserve a bit of celebration, don’t we, Jason?”
You make dinner for the both of you, a simple but favourite pasta dish of yours that you’re grateful to have made extra of when Jason clears his plate in the time it takes you to carry your own plate into the dining room where you’d set him down. You pout at him sympathetically, running a hand over his head.
“If you’re still hungry,” you murmur, taking a seat and spearing a pasta shell on your fork, “there’s more in the pan, sweetheart.”
In the next room, a clatter almost immediately and it draws a smile on your face. You treat yourself to a glass of something sweet, giggling when the bubbles flit up your nose and pop. The taste lingers on your tongue when, after dinner, you scoop him up into your arms and travel into the living room. A record is placed onto the old gramophone and you spin on your feet, socked feet sinking into the plush carpet as you dance around the room. You spin, and spin, and spin until you land on the couch, laughing breathlessly. On the couch, Jason watches until you pick him up once more and dance with him in your arms. You’re careful with him, conscious of tripping in your state and dropping him. You think he might enjoy it, when you hear the whisper of laughter alongside your own.
When you tuck him into bed that night, it’s with a giddy smile as you kiss his forehead. You go to bed feeling floaty, lighter than you’ve felt in an age. There’s a buzz in your veins that isn’t entirely the drink. You’re happy. It isn’t the same as the life you’d wanted back so fervently, but you’re hopeful. It feels, for the first time, like things might work out. You cling to this victory with a vice grip, unwilling to be parted from it.
Your head hits the pillow and you sleep easily, but wake in the middle of the night, slipping out of hazy dreams into consciousness like slipping upstream. You’re distinctly aware of the wetness pooling between your legs, and the lingering warmth of the drinks.
It’s been a long time. The stress of everything – moving, money, adjusting to the manor – has left you unable to focus on anything else. Tonight, though, a reprieve from it all, a break in the clouds offers you a spike in your energy, a longing that heats the blood in your veins and makes your stomach twist. For the first time in a long time, you indulge, fingers creeping beneath the waistband of your pants.
.
.
.
He watches you touch yourself, the night spent tending to what is a seemingly insatiable appetite. Hardening in his trousers, he stands behind the panelling and a large hand curls into a fist by his side, nails digging into the meat of his palm so hard he draws blood. You work yourself up, differently from the way you had when he’d revealed himself. It’s gentler, fingers skimming over your skin beneath the fabric of your shirt. In the dark his gaze sharpens on the soft plane of your stomach, your body shifting under every touch, pliant and responsive. 
You come, and it isn’t enough. He tastes copper, sees stars when you kick the covers off and his keen eyes make out the folds of your cunt, sodden and wanting. Your body is covered in a sheen of sweat when you finally, finally, drift off to sleep. Hungry little thing, his girl. You’ll want for nothing, he thinks, remembering the debauched way you’d put your fingers to your mouth. He recalls the slick sounds, the little whines, drawn out and practically demanding he come forth to please you. With no one around for miles to hear you, unknowingly, you feed him with your gasps. 
He longs for it, imagines putting his mouth to you. How you’d keen, how you’d thrash under his hold like you had tonight, legs kicking out under the full force of your pleasure. But he’d hold you down, he thinks, breathing hard, draw even more wretched sounds from that mouth – pretty, soft mouth that always curled around his name so sweetly – than the ones you’d spilled out tonight. Prettier, than the sobs of the last few weeks, that’d had him gritting his teeth. He likes you drunk and dizzy on pleasure like this, likes the breathless, open mouthed smile that pushes the apples of your cheeks upwards. This, he thinks, is all you should know, tears born of desire. Not jittery hands, or envy.
Frail, pretty thing. You need to be taken care of. You wouldn’t know worry ever again, he would take care of you, would take care of everything. You’ll want for nothing.
His chest heaves at the thought, muscles tensing as if readying to crash through the wood at a moment’s notice. 
No, he thinks, taking a shuddering breath. He can almost taste you from here but – not yet. 
.
.
.
You wake up sticky, despite the chill in the air. Late autumn carries with it hints of the oncoming winter – you think it’s going to be a bad one, if your fingertips are numb already. It takes a bit of maneuvering to untangle yourself from the web of sheets and when you finally stand, there’s a distant ache in your head, a dryness in your throat that makes you grimace. 
You drag yourself into the shower, scrubbing off the filth of last night’s activities and letting the warm water run over your muscles. The steam fills the air of the bathroom, thick enough to trap the warmth when you step out and reach for your towel. 
It confuses you, though, once you’ve dried off and moisturised, that when you turn to reach for your clothes, they aren’t there. A sense of déjà vu settles over you. Significantly more awake, you wrap the towel around you once more and make the trek back to your room, a little peeved.
“Jason,” you call out as you pad down the hall, trying to keep the bite in your tone from being too harsh. “This isn’t funny, it’s cold. I’m not very impressed right now.”
Not even a laugh, but you’re too huffy to notice, picking up your clothes from where he’d relocated them to the top of your dresser and shutting your door firmly. 
When you go to pick him up before breakfast – closer to lunch, now, really – you frown at him. 
“Not cool, kid,” you tell him. “What if I got sick? Who’d make you lunch, then, hm? You can’t survive on peanut butter sandwiches alone.”
It feels a little as though you’ve regressed over the next week. More and more things go missing, only to turn up in the oddest places. You think he might be a little more playful, finally comfortable around you, but it’s hard to find gratification in that when your underwear joins the catalogue of missing things, turning up when you take your laundry out to hang even though you know you hadn’t put them in the washing. So maybe there’s a bit of wilful ignorance there. You don’t know how to address this, the pressing feeling of eyes on you at every moment now, an obvious presence that lingers around you more insistently, it feels, than before.
And you can’t place what’s brought this on, don’t know what’s to blame for this turn in his mood, toeing the line of malevolent, no longer innocently playful but shifting into something more intent, dull blue eyes seeming darker these days, more watchful. 
“What’s going on, huh?” you ask, when you put him to bed, brushing a hand over his hair. “How come you don’t wanna be good anymore? Is something up? I don’t know, kid, I’m not a mind reader.”
You let out a breath, shaking your head. Leaning forward, you brush your lips against his forehead. “Let’s have a better day tomorrow, okay? Goodnight, Jason.”
Midnight comes to you in slow winks that night, the pages of Jason’s book marked with a ribbon and placed carefully to the side with the half-formed, tired thought that you would talk to him about it tomorrow. Perhaps it would soften whatever had him agitated as of late. The lamp switches off, and you breathe out into the darkness, one last sigh before sleep claims you. 
You wake up to a pressing blackness. Not even the moonlight breaks through the clouds to offer you reprieve tonight, the very air sucked out of the room. Groggy, sleep still clinging to you like silken threads of a spider’s web around your eyes, you blink rapidly. The darkness settles around you and your vision adjusts.
The first thing you notice is the hulking silhouette at the foot of your bed and you freeze under the covers, breath punching out of your chest. 
Your first thought is to scream. Before your lips can even part, a rough palm is pressing over your mouth and tears prick your eyes. 
(What’s the point? Who is there to hear you scream so far out here?)
In the dim, your tearful eyes adjust further and your heart seizes in your chest when you make out the glint of white – a porcelain mask, a face that’s been your only companion these last few weeks. The cupid’s bow, rosy cheeks greyed in the dark. Down to the very last detail, it’s him.
The cause of all the haunting, the thief of your belongings, sentry of this manor. Not a spirit, but real, solid flesh and blood. He looms over you. There’s a solid weight that settles into the cradle of your hips, arms that cage you in, the smell of sawdust and something. Unbidden, your mind tugs back to you the missing lace, satin stolen by unseen hands – the very hands that press on your mouth and side, now, calloused, roughened. 
The whisper of your name hangs in the air between you, your resounding whimper muffled.
It’s faster than it ought to be, your compliance, going limp in his hold and ceasing your thrashing. You stare tearfully, heart in your throat, up at him. He lingers like this a moment longer before withdrawing, seemingly satisfied you won’t bolt. Slowly, you push up onto your elbows. The movement brings your face closer to his, and it takes every ounce of your willpower not to flinch at the proximity. He seems pleased enough, however, head tilting, rather like a cat, tracking your movements carefully. 
It isn’t as though you’re going anywhere, his weight yet to lift from your legs. You reach out to the side, a shaking hand scrabbling for the flip of a switch. The sudden flood of orange light into the room, soft though it is, makes you flinch.
It’s the eyes that you’re drawn to first. Through the holes of the mask, you meet ultramarine eyes, leagues beyond that of the painting downstairs, which couldn’t hold a candle to the vibrant irises that stare back at you now. Your breath catches when he leans in a hair’s breadth closer and he pauses. 
Your voice fails you, when you part your lips to speak, frightened tears wetting your face. You clear your throat, and try once more.
“Jason?”
Dark lashes flutter, something pleased passing through his gaze, something like an unspoken affirmation. It floors you, the blood rushing from your head and leaving you dizzy all of a sudden. He swallows your field of vision, so impossibly big, broad and nothing about him carrying any of the delicateness your doll had. Dark curls fall over the edges of the mask, dark hair peeking beneath it, trailing down the sides of his jaw. 
You reach out, carefully, and he lets you press a hand to his chest – clad in a thin, dirtied henley. He gives under the slightest pressure, drawing back until he’s sitting on his haunches, your legs free. You let go, pushing yourself further up against the headboard of the bed and bringing your knees to your chest. He watches, silent, unmoving except for the slow, steady rise and fall of his chest. Real, solid, flesh and blood.
“You’ve been alive this whole time?” The dust clings to your sticky cheeks and you swipe at them again. Your breaths are shaky as you come down from your fright. He nods, and you wince, the porcelain mask shining as it reflects the light of your lamp.
“Can you – will you take that off? Please?” He stills and you, foolish, softened by fear or trust, scoot forward a little, legs folding under you. Now it’s his turn to widen the distance between you. You let out a soft warble, lips trembling. “It’s scaring me.”
“...Scary?” His voice is hoarse from disuse, and your eyes drop to his sides, watching his fingers curl into fists. “Under...you won’t like it..”
Your breath catches on a sob and you shake your head. You’re still shaking, still scared. He draws a little closer, hands raising as if to reach for you, and you flinch. “Please, Jason.”
Time stretches so long you fear you’ll remain here forever, trembling, suffocating, before big hands reach up to his face. He’s shaking, too, you notice absently. His head bows when the mask is discarded to the side, lying atop your sheets face down. The shadows obscure him slightly, cloaking his face from you, only the dark thatches of hair that cover his jaw visible to you. 
You whisper his name.
His eyes flash when he lifts his head, blue flickering into a green glow so suddenly it feels like a trick of the light – gone in an instant. Scarred flesh, waxy, pink patches of skin and pale, jagged remnants of lacerations; he bares himself to you and your breath catches in your throat. 
There are remnants of a classical beauty in his face, beneath the scarring. It’s the kind that would’ve made you stop short on the street, that would’ve brought warmth to your face if you’d met his eyes across a subway car during rush hour. The violence wrought renders him no less handsome but lends a brutality to him, the oppressive aura that cloaks him impossible to ignore, laid bare across his face. Still, there’s a vulnerability in his eyes that your attention snags on, a child-like wariness that reminds you of the headline you’d found in Bruce’s office that day.
Silly, soft-hearted girl. It makes your heart ache, and once the tears start, they refuse to stop. Your hand draws closer to cradle his face, hovering a hair’s breadth from his cheek before he makes the leap for you, leaning against your touch. His own comes up, fingers pressing beneath your eye.
“Crying..”
“I’m sorry,” you whisper, sniffling, wiping your nose on your sleeve. “I’m sorry you had to go through that.”
“Crying for me?” His voice sounds odd, a tone you can’t quite read through your tears. You try to look away but he refuses to let you, clumsy fingers swiping beneath your eyes.
“You didn’t deserve that. That must’ve been so scary,” you sniffle, and look up at him. “Why were you...why’d you hide? Did – did your father know?” 
His eyes flash at the mention of Bruce, and you still at the anger that lines his face. 
“Bastard,” he mutters, a decade’s worth of pain packed into one word. It hints to a history you aren’t privy to, raw, jagged wounds still bleeding from an age old hurt. He stiffens and you slide your hand to his shoulder.
“Okay, don’t – we don’t have to talk about him,” you defer hastily, wary of the way his muscles ripple, the thrum of lightning barely contained beneath his skin. It reminds you of something else. “Was...It was you...that night, when they -”
Your breath stutters on the memory of the invasion, and his eyes darken. He crowds into your space more, ducking his head to meet your eyes. More green than blue now, he wills you to understand the severity of his promise.
“Keep you safe,” he says, and you barely notice the hand that curls possessively around your hip, your heart thrumming anxiously in its cavity at the threat of violence his words carry. And yet, you can’t deny it to yourself that it quiets a part of you, too, stills a restlessness that had lingered in your skin after that night. 
You don’t consider that night, why he had chosen to reveal himself to you – properly, in all his glory, stripped of parlour tricks and the facade – you’re too relieved that he doesn’t intend to hurt you to linger on it. He lets you guide him back to his room and draw the covers over him, the mask carefully carried in your hands and placed on the bedside table. He catches your hand when you go to leave and for a moment you fear he’ll demand something of you, blue eyes flashing cat’s eye green for the briefest of moments. He lets you go after a moment’s scrutiny, and you eke out a timid goodnight, returning to your bedroom in a daze. 
Perhaps you ought to have, though. Perhaps it might have suited you better to linger on the why, to consider what this meant, that there was something in motion, had been since your arrival. Exhaustion renders you pliant, however, and you slip into dreamless sleep the moment your head hits the pillow, the lingering smell of sawdust beneath your nose.
.
.
.
Jason makes it easy on you. It’s a little eerie in a way, re-learning him and yet finding all the hints of your spirit companion in him. He doesn’t stray far from you, content to continue to sit at your side when you sit down for your classes. In the morning, when you go to check on him, he is already awake, and you usher him into the bathroom, unsure at all whether you even should follow the schedule but moving mechanically if only for something to do, to avoid floundering. He waits by the door as you brush your teeth, eyes fixed on you. 
You find yourself returning the stare, brows furrowing as you take in every inch of him. Dust and dirt clings to his skin. You wonder when the last time he’d bathed was. You tell him as much, receiving only a blank stare. Uncommunicative, even now. 
“You should take a bath,” you murmur, worrying the skin of your lip with your teeth. “I don’t want you to get sick, or something.”
He’s compliant enough, letting you steer him into the bathroom and turning the knobs of the tub. Water comes spraying out, and you startle a little when the pipes whine, but ultimately settle. Dipping a hand in, you test the temperature before looking over your shoulder. He stands by your side, and you tilt your head to the water.
“Will you check if this is okay?” He obeys, dropping his chin in a short nod after brushing his fingers in. You offer him a short smile, and move to stand.
“I’ll try to find some clothes, this is...” you hesitate, looking at the hem of his shirt. “You can’t wear this.”
But his arm blocks your path when you go to step around him, curling around your midsection to keep you in place. You look up, startled. You try to move but he doesn’t budge, looking down at you intently. 
“You’ll stay.” It isn’t a request, nor a command, but he delivers it firmly, a matter of fact statement – that you will remain here, with him. You balk, blood rushing to your face.
“I can’t!” you protest, stepping back if only to escape the barricade of his arm, your hands coming up to rest on your hips. “That’s not – Jason, it’s not-”
“You’ll stay,” he repeats, simply, rock-salt voice echoing slightly in the bathroom. Water drips into the steaming bath, and you’re at an impasse, abject indignation warming your veins.
In the end, you give in. You think there was no possible outcome where you did not acquiesce to his whims – you recall the destruction he’d wreaked on his father’s office the night you had foregone a kiss goodnight, frightening you back into his room to press your lips to his temple. You sit by the side of the tub, handing him a cloth and keeping your eyes trained firmly ahead of you as he scrubs himself down. Somehow, you end up washing his hair for him, soapy water providing a suitable enough cover that you breathe a sigh of relief. It’s the gentlest you’ve ever seen him, pleased and bath soft, skin flushed and curls wet against his forehead as you pour water over his crown. 
He only lets you go once the water begins to grow cool and you insist on finding clean clothes for him. It’s easier than you think, rifling through the drawers in the master bedroom and finding a pair of soft trousers and t-shirt that you figure will fit him. You keep your back turned when he emerges from the bath, waiting until he’s dressed to face him with warmth in your cheeks. The glimpse you’d caught as he’d risen from the water had made you squeak, hard lines and dark hair, wet skin glistening – all Man, real, breathing, human man. It’s a jarring contrast from the sexless porcelain of his counterpart. Your heart skips a beat at the sight of his broad chest and you promptly whirl around, guilt swarming in your stomach at your momentary lapse in senses.
(In his mind he thinks, don’t you know you’re all his, as he is yours? There is no inch of him that isn’t for your eyes.)
When you sit down for your classes later, you’re more conscious of his presence than ever, a warm arm diffusing soft heat at your elbow. He only shakes his head when you ask if he would rather do something else and you get the feeling later, when you take a bathroom break, that he would follow after you, had you not closed it between you. 
He sits close when you have lunch, knee knocking into yours beneath the table in the kitchen. You watch him eat, ravenous, and your wariness melts a little at the familiarity. This, you knew. This, you could handle. When he finishes his plate you push your own towards him in lieu of pointing to the pan but he surprises you – shaking his head and watching you carefully until he’s satisfied you’re fed. 
It’s sort of like losing a friend to gain a guard dog. He lingers by your side, catalogues your every movement and bosses you around where he sees fit. You don’t know how to feel about it, and don’t witness the full extent of it until, midway through your lunch, there’s a knock at the back door.
Reactive, he’s a wraith at your back, chair clattering and pressing you away. No guests. You recall the first rule in his schedule as you wrangle him, a hand tight on his chest to set him at ease. You figure it’s fear, in his own, muddled way. There had been a break in, after all, he wouldn’t take kindly to anyone else on the property – you were the only one meant to be here.
“It’s only the groceries,” you whisper, fingers circling around his wrist and pressing down against his pulse to draw his attention. Green eyes strike you down, near unseeing in his wrath and you startle. The seconds pass and you figure the longer this goes unhandled, the likelier Jason is to react for the worse. You take a deep breath, wrangling your own unease to step in front of him, blocking off his path to the door and squeezing his wrist once more.
“I’m not going anywhere. It’s okay,” you murmur, stroking the back of his hand comfortingly. “Just wait here for me, okay? It’s okay.”
He lingers in the room, though it seems only you’re aware of it as the delivery boy brings the bags in. You’re thankful he doesn’t loiter, unwilling to test Jason’s thin patience. The very shadows in the room seem to stretch the longer it takes and by the time the final bag is carried in and the receipt is left on the counter, you fear the kitchen floor will start to crack beneath your feet.
He’s on you the moment the door shuts, wrapping himself around you to run big hands over your sides, assessing you like he hadn’t kept you in his line of sight the entire exchange. You sigh, letting him tilt your chin, inspecting your face. The green in his eyes has completely swallowed the shades of blue, pupils dilated as he closes in on you.
“I’m fine,” you assure. He seems ill-convinced, but finally lets go. “Come on. You’re probably still hungry. Maybe that’s why you’re acting like this.”
He lets out a puff of breath in response and you let out a small laugh. 
You make the mistake that night, when you see him off to bed, of unthinkingly voicing out loud as you look around the room,
“Isn’t it -” you hesitate, feeling your words catch on something. You ought to listen to it, but he tilts his head inquisitively, and it coaxes it out of you. “Doesn’t it feel weird sleeping in here? It’s a kid’s room. I don’t think you even fit in that bed.”
His eyes gleam, and you don’t understand what for until he pushes up from the covers and stands. Your brows draw together, confused, but you have no time to question it, weight on your shoulders pushing you forward until you’re steered down the hall to – 
Your room.
You stare, wide eyed, as he pushes you; he’s clumsy, but gentle, fingers coaxing you under your covers before rounding the bed to slip under them on your other side. Your heart catches in your throat, alarmed.
“Jason – no, this isn’t what I meant, you-” He turns on his side and you fall silent. 
“Kiss goodnight,” he murmurs, a hand reaching out beneath the soft weight of your covers to tug you closer, warmth searing through your pants where it rests on your hip. You resist, pressing against his chest to create a modicum of distance between you, but it’s impossible against his strength. Again, your mind supplies you unhelpfully with attention to the heat that rolls off him, the proximity or lack thereof between you. 
“Are you – did the delivery upset you? Is this why-” You’re grasping for straws, searching for something to cling to, a reason that softens the weight of his gaze and all that lies behind it. You blind yourself to it, convince yourself the flash of his eyes is affirmation, let yourself believe it, breathing out a shaky, “Okay.”
“Kiss.” He repeats the word, and your chest presses against his. He’s a furnace, warmth trapped beneath the covers threatening to burn you alive. Your mouth is dry as you lean up, smoothing a hand against his curls to flatten them backwards, bare his temple to you. 
“Goodnight,” you whisper, into his hairline, lips brushing against the raised outline of a pale scar. 
Slowly, the sands in your hourglass begin to trickle to an end.
.
.
.
The kisses brush closer and closer these days. No longer do your lips meet the spot at his hairline, or his temple. The first time Jason brings a hand to your cheek and guides you lower, you’re too surprised to do anything, kissing the higher point of his cheekbone and pulling away hastily, face warm. It feels so incredibly inappropriate, letting him continue to blur the boundaries between you. He makes a noise of discontent the next night, when you return to his forehead, only settling back into your sheets when your mouth finds his cheek. The hand on the back of your neck is heavy, fingers brushing against the small hairs in feather light touches and sending shocks of something down your spine. 
He sleeps on his side, always, facing you. You can feel his eyes on your back as you feign sleep. Is it unwise, to turn your back to him, you wonder. The idea of sleeping on your other side makes your stomach curdle, his breath fanning over your cheek, nose brushing against yours – much too close, too intimate for the way he’s been acting lately. You fear if you give him an inch you’ll never come back from it.
(Silly little thing. You were his the moment you stepped over the threshold.)
Tonight, Jason is heavier handed with you than usual. Something simmers in your gut as he presses on the back of your neck, green eyes near luminescent under the swathes of soft orange light from your lamp. You waver, but it’s all you can do to give in, your arms threatening to buckle under you if you don’t follow. Hovering over his side, you bend your head.
Lower still, Jason pulls you to him – you only barely manage to avoid meeting his lips with your own, skating the corner of his mouth and planting a clumsy peck there. When you chance a look up at him, he’s already watching you, a crease where his eyebrows meet.
“Kiss goodnight,” he says, expectantly, voice rough with an undercurrent of something eerily like want. It makes your breath hitch.
“I...I did,” you stammer, one last attempt at resistance. He doesn’t buy it, blinking slowly at you. 
“Kiss.”
Saliva pools in your mouth the longer he stares at you, time stretching between you as he waits and when you swallow, his gaze flicks down to track the movement of your throat, pupils dilating. Now, only a thin ring of green surrounds the vastness of black, observing your every action. 
Finally, seemingly sick of your inaction, Jason shifts upwards on the bed and you squeak in surprise, reeling backwards only to meet the solid wall of his hand. Your heart races in your chest, sounds spilling out of your mouth that are muffled when he closes the distance and slants his lips against yours.
It’s a wet, messy thing, clumsy and hungry. Jason’s tongue slides against your bottom lip hungrily and you, foolishly, part your lips to protest. He only uses it to push further, tongue tracing the contours of your mouth, a deep groan wracking through him, a deep-seated tremor that you think he must have been holding back for a long time. His hand fists the material of your pants, the other bearing down on your neck as if to press you even closer. Your own are helpless against his chest, unbalanced and tottering forward onto his lap, trying to push away –
“Mmh, no, J-” you’re cut off, unable to get out a single word. “’S wrong.”
He ignores you, swallowing the pitiful whimper you let out to lick into your mouth. You’re dizzy, head spinning from the lack of air, mouth swollen and spit slicked. Against his chest, your fists push weakly, your strength pale in comparison to his. Absently, a part of you wonders if that’s really the reason you aren’t trying harder – a distinct pressure growing between your legs that you try to tamp down. 
Your spine arches ever so slightly under his fingers, legs bracketing his hips to accommodate his size. The throb you feel between your legs is not only his.
But it’s wrong. You can’t.
Uncaring of your internal conflict, the world around you tips in a matter of seconds and you blink up at Jason, vision swimming as he comes into sight. Your positions are now reversed, with him hovering over your body, pressed flat against the wrinkled sheets. Your clothing is rumpled, top riding up the expanse of your stomach and baring your flesh to hungry eyes.
He remains between your legs, an arm descending beside you to hold himself up as he closes in. You shake your head, twisting to avoid the wet press of his mouth against yours again, your hand coming to press against his shoulder.
“No– ‘s wrong,” you murmur, desperately, trying to push him away. Undeterred, his mouth trails over the line of your jaw and you stumble over a gasp when his teeth graze over your skin, taking it between his lips and nipping, tongue flicking out almost immediately after to soothe the sting, something like a keen in his throat when you squirm beneath him. You draw blood trying to stifle the sound you nearly make as a result of it, legs going to press together but only tightening around his waist.
“Not,” he pants, hand on your leg squeezing, trailing higher until it skims the space above your waistband, fingers ghosting over your bare belly. His touch leaves a trail of wildfire behind it, burning licks over your skin that make you gasp. “Not wrong.”
You whimper, a haze of desire settling like a cloud cover over your guilt when he flattens his hand over your stomach and presses down, eyes flashing possessively as he delivers his next blow. “Not wrong,” he repeats in a reverent whisper, leaning down until you’re nose to nose. The smell of cedarwood fills your nose, a history he’s unable to scrub no matter how much of your soap he uses, the milk and honey scented liquid bubbling over his skin. You hold your breath, eyes widening, the flex of his bicep in your periphery as he supports his weight with one arm. “You’re mine.”
The tears leak out of your eyes, and you shake your head. “I’m – not.”
Nose caressing yours – “You are,” he confirms steadily, voice low. 
You understand then, the curtains pulling back to reveal the future that has been hanging in the wings this whole time for you, the fate you’d sealed for yourself. The long absence of his father, the shiftiness in Bruce’s demeanour when you’d met him and the eagerness in which he took his leave. Your very purpose, here – all of it, every strand, threaded, curling around you. 
It all leads to Jason.
He swallows your sob with an open mouthed kiss, then, and the sands of time run out.
It’s horrifying, the gentleness he treats you with, divesting you of your clothing like you might wilt under his fingers if he isn’t careful, delicate flower that he thinks you to be. There’s adoration in every touch, worship in his eyes. Layer by layer, they come off until you’re bare beneath him, swathes of orange light swimming over your belly and lighting a fire in his eyes. They’re green again, now, near neon in hue, teeming with barely restrained hunger. His fingers shake, hovering over your sides, pressing you down when you try to raise your arms. One broad hand swallows your wrists, held against the soft flesh of your stomach as the other begins to tug his shirt off. 
Your breath catches in your throat, whimpered pleas clogging your airway when his fingers drift to the waistband of his pants. Scars, so many scars line the expanse of his torso. His body is a map of puckered lines and flat, pale marks, a lifetime of brutality carved into his skin. Dark whorls of hair dust his chest and stomach, a pattern that continues lower as he tugs his trousers off, muscles flexing as he twists. In another lifetime, under an entirely different set of circumstances, you might’ve salivated at the sight of a man like this, might’ve reached out to splay a hand against his barrel chest, reveled in how miniscule you were in comparison. In another lifetime, there wouldn’t be that ever pressing guilt, that shame that colours your vision and tightens around your neck – you might’ve admitted to wanting it.
In another lifetime, you might’ve even begged for it.
Your mind eddies at the sight of him, blood rushing so startlingly through your veins you have to slump back into the sheets, dizzy and daunted. You’re stunned into silence, throat too dry to string together any sounds beyond a strangled whimper.
He’s thick, head an angry, dark colour that you can’t make out in the low light, weeping. As if caught in a dream, you watch a bead of pre-cum slip down his length, the light gleaming over the trail it leaves on his skin. When you raise your eyes, fearful, he’s already watching you, eyes sharp.
The bright green of his irises shocks you back into your body, and you begin to shake your head anew, struggling to push yourself away, back hitting the headboard. 
“No, Jason, no.” You begin to weep, hands coming to pound weakly at his chest when he hovers over you once more and he dips his head, nosing along your cheek. Your tears do little to stop him. If anything, it only spurs him on, pupils dilated at the sight of you like this and breathing growing ragged. A rough hand skims along your ankle and pulls, until you’re flat on your back beneath him. “It’s wrong.”
“Don’t cry,” he rumbles, plaintive, lips brushing against yours clumsily, an attempt at comfort. He settles between your legs, one slung over his hip and you mewl when he tilts forward, the weight of his length sliding against your traitorously wet folds. You draw blood trying to stifle a whimper when his head nudges against your clit, a dizzying spiral of unwanted pleasure curling down your spine. His lips curve into a pout against yours, a hair’s breadth between them as he presses his forehead to yours.
“I’ll be good,” he promises quietly, voice pitching into a plea as he ruts against you. You squeeze your eyes tightly, trying to turn your head but a hand comes up to cup your jaw, keeping you face to face with him. “I’ll be good. I’ll–‘ll take care of you. Make you feel good.”
Clumsy, painful, intrusive. You’re wet, but it’s not enough – Jason breaches your entrance and your gasp teeters on a scream, fingernails digging into the meat of his forearm as you struggle to accommodate for his size, not nearly prepared enough for the stretch. His voice joins yours, a different kind of pain in his groans as he pushes slowly in. You curse him, drawing blood where your nails sink into his skin and gasping for breath. 
It’s sweltering in the room, despite the chill of winter, Jason’s body a canopy over yours. Every inch of him that presses against you is searing, burning to the touch and threatening to flay you alive. You sob when he finally bottoms out, his teeth gritted and forehead scrunched, the last strands of his control steadily fraying. 
Big fingers swipe at your under eyes, smearing your tears instead of wiping them, and then he begins to move. The first thrust winds you, pushing all the air out of your lungs and eliciting a choked sound out of your throat, one he echoes, dropping his head into the hollow of your neck and thrusting again. 
Shame and guilt war within you, fear pebbling your skin as his hips cant forwards, setting a sloppy pace meant only to seek a quick release. Every second that ticks past, he draws closer and closer to the edge and shamefully – so do you. There’s a burning in your gut, the sound of your wetness loud in the room over his desperate groans, your cunt squeezing around his thick length. It’s a horrifying truth, one you don’t want to accept – it feels good. The drag of his cock against you, the slippery movements of his fingers, the overwhelming weight of his body against yours. It lights every nerve in your body alight, repulsion and longing amassing as one, a torturous cover that threads through your veins against your will.
Your sobs subside as it comes to you, pleasure pooling slowly in your gut like a leaky faucet, a puddle growing until your cries turn into whimpers, gasped breaths when he manages to find that one spot that empties your head of all thought. 
No, no, no turns into muffled whines, your tears carving their own scarred paths down your face. Each thrust, every slide of his length and whisper of his fingers carves a bit of your resistance away, until all that’s left between your desire and his is the ruins of your sensibilities. The last of your defences gone, your nerves feel like spun sugar, dizzying, electrifying – wanting, needing more. 
He’s highly attuned to your reactions, and you watch through blurry eyes as his gleam when he makes this realisation, thrusting forward unforgivably and pulling more screams from you. Your head tips back into the pillow, ultraviolet green burned into the back of your eyelids. 
“Be good for – for you,” he gasps out, a low whine building in his throat and you weep, arms reaching up to wind around his shoulders. It’s a twisted thing, that the one inflicting this on you should bring you comfort, but you cling to him still. He tucks himself closer to you, eager to provide this cover, allowing you to hide your face in his neck – hide from yourself, as he fucks you. His hands wander, brushing, coaxing, petting your body. No longer are you the caretaker, but now the doll, almost. A pretty thing for him to cradle, to have, to do with as he pleases. And he does, driving into you hungrily, as though he’s been starved of it, unable to hold himself back any longer. He sates his appetite on you tonight, teeth, tongue, cock. All of you, his for the taking. Under his hand you are taken apart and remade, molded by rough hands and lovingly pieced together until you’re born anew, settling into your role like drifting into dreams.
Your orgasm washes over you, abrupt and unrelenting, so far gone a scream tears from your throat to bleed into his, your teeth sinking into the junction of his neck and shoulder as your leg kicks out and you fall apart on his length. Sloppy thrusts pick up the pace and he presses you further down into the sheets, grasp on your hips and waist bruising. It’s animal, the way he bucks into you, mouth open in a snarl to bare sharp canines, tongue laving against your pulse. 
Too much – it’s too much. You’re still riding out the high of your orgasm, but he continues to fuck into you, head bumping against one particular spot that has your toes curling painfully, body twisting in his grasp and trying to pull away. A vain effort. Even your squealed protests fall on deaf ears, dizzying pleasure bubbling up once more in your gut, overwhelming and feverish.
Your eyes squeeze shut tight as you come again, colour exploding in your vision in vivid hues of red and orange, mouth dropping open to swallow lungfuls of air. Jason, in your ear, lets out a guttural moan that lances straight through his chest to spear yours. Warmth trickles down your body, spend and slick smeared where the two of you are connected. 
You swim in and out of focus, eyelids heavy and attention spotty. Like an old radio, or as if underwater, his voice breaches your consciousness in snippets. Soft cooing and fingers stroking along your spine, you’re vaguely aware of being shifted, hefted onto a warm chest as easily as lifting a feather. Downy hairs tickle your cheek, the smell of musk and cedarwood burning beneath your nose.
Mine...so good...take care of...
There’s an ache between your hips, a fullness that has yet to retract – but when you blink drowsily up at your captor, you begin to realise in the last dregs of your consciousness: in this, and all that follows after, he has no intention of parting from you.
Cobalt blue now, half lidded eyes regard you with reverence, kiss bitten lips cooing unintelligibly, praises you barely register. Jason cranes his head to press his mouth against your temple – a mockery of your rituals to you, perhaps an homage, in his twisted mind. 
.
.
.
The mark on his neck smarts, the beast in his chest purring in satisfaction. He looks down at you, the drying tears on your face, lashes fluttering in your sleep. He strokes a finger over the crease between your brows, dragging down to where your lips part ever so slightly. He barely manages to hold back a satisfied rumble when, at the touch of his finger, you accept him in. Precious, sweet girl. Even in sleep, you know him. He shifts on his back, careful not to jostle you too much, and once more the bite stings. In the morning, you’ll insist on tending to it, he knows. Your eyes will pool, diamantine, lips trembling tearfully at the wound you’ve left on him. You’ve claimed him as he would you, in time, but he knows it’ll take a little longer for you to see it as he does, that in the morning you’ll begin to piece back the ruins of your defences and he’ll have to work again to keep them down. 
That’s okay. He’s got all the time in the world. You’ll see, soon. Out here, with only each other for company, you’ll quickly learn. He’ll take care of you.
You’ll want for nothing.
fin.
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um. there's a lot i wanted to include in this fic, mostly that there's something off about jason's death and his being alive - i didn't really get to explore that beyond the eyes so if you caught that i hope u know i meant for it to convey that he's a Freak.
Brahms in The Boy is entirely human but i think there's an air of supernaturalism to jason in this (and even arguably in the original source material) with how such a large man manages to move through the walls quietly and quickly, he feels a bit wraith like to me. also again with the eyes - there's something wrong with him but there's literally like 294728 other things to worry about that you don't notice until it's staring at you in the face and by then it's too late.
anyway this came to me during finals and it was driving me SO damn insane during finals, i think i've been working on this for about a month? i'm not sure - the writing program i've been using lately doesn't have a date of creation so i don't really know but finals were in early june so maybe just shy of two months? i would say a month and a half.
this is the first time i've properly dipped my toe into content of a darker nature like this and i hope i did it justice! idk i wanted to try my hand at something new, i think there's a lot that's interesting about the psychological aspect of fics like this, like the buildup and feelings leading up to and during the climax. anyway this was a bit of an experiment and i hope you enjoyed it.
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