#binged it in like 3 days now im making my bf watch
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finished Monster (2004) like a week ago and im starting to think its gonna hurt me forever
#just how i like my media <3#binged it in like 3 days now im making my bf watch#whenever i get sad thinking about The Events i just think of mr Grimmer#he go ^--^ and ill love him forever#monster anime#anyway enjoy the inevitable spam posts#monster 2004
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please i need colinjamie headcanons or prompts i’ve been deprived of them for too long
i am. so so sorry for how late this is. and how uncoordinated the rest of this will probably end up being, but, just, ima unleash random colinjamie thoughts on u and hope it makes sense lol and that you enjoy them, but since idk how long it'll end up ima put everything under the cut
random hcs
colinjamie have definitely watched the owl house at some point. maybe this is fresh in my head since the final episode just came out a few days ago, but i definitely see colinjamie watching the owl house together. two options:
maybe colin was chilling with his niece (i want colin to have a niece or a nephew so bad, he gives uncle vibes and also i want jamie to interact with the kid at some point too) and she was watching it and he got invested. and then jamie got invested via colin. OR. henry was visiting the stadium on spring break and mentioned the owl house to jamie, who was curious, watched and episode, and then got invested. flash forward to colinjamie fwb era and colin dropping by one day and finding jamie losing his shit over the episode hollow mind. jamie needs to lose his shit with someone and colin is the poor soul who came over for a hook up but ended up having to watch two seasons of a disney cartoon.
that being said, i also think that jamie, if he ever watched avatar the last airbender as a kid, only ever watched until mid season 2. life got more complicated and he was more concerned with playing well than "lazy" things like cartoons. he never got to zuko standing up to his dad. he'll get there someday, it's gonna be great
colinjamie have a unique sense of style that they somehow make work, it drives so many people mad
colin had a crush on lightning mcqueen when he was a kid. (11 years old? idk how old colin is, so im putting him at 28 in s3, making him 11 when cars came out) he thinks about this childhood crush and figures its pretty telling that he's got a speedy car and a cocky but talented boyfriend
jamie is dyslexic, and when he realized audiobooks existed, he was thrilled. still, his favorite way to experience books is to have colin read them out to him.
that being said, his favorite way to enjoy drake is to have colin rapping along
colin takes jamie along to theater performances, musicals, and the ballet.
jamie found the "whose the worm now" moment so hot. he can't let colin find out
random prompt
prompt #1
so this might be because i just re read the seven husbands of evelyn hugo, daisy jones and the six, and carrie soto is back, as well as binging all of the daisy jones and the six show, and have been listening to taylor swift all month, but i am craving something specific?
like, i am so here for an au with actor or pop star jamie (have y'all heard phil dunster's voice?) and richmond player colin hughes. its giving posh spice and david beckham.
just the different flavors of it all. if we have it in modern times, as in, the time ted lasso is set in the show, we can do so much. (we can also have a colin who is not actually a fan of his bf's music. it's not that he hates it, it's just not his style. jamie knows this, and writes songs about colin anyways. colin loves listening to these songs regardless of them not being his style.)
then of course there is the other option--i am so bad at timelines and math, so dont come for me when this is all wrong, but i, on my 7 husband of eh kick, was like omg?? give me hollywood star jamie tartt and football player colin hughes who are "roommates."
prompt #2
im a sucker for vampires and vampire hunters. i think it can go either way for them in terms of whose the vampire and whose the vampire hunters.
prompt #3
a canon divergence au where colinjamie were dating s1. jamie and keeley were dating prior to his loan to richmond and stayed friends after their breakup. he really did love her, but still hadn't learned to be accountable yet. keeley still comes around to the club bc she's jamie's best friend and wants to test the playing field with roy.
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kiss me // j.jh
♦️Pairing: jaehyun x fem reader
♦️Other Members/ Characters: 97 line GC (Eunwoo, Jungkook and Mingyu) + Jihyo of Twice (also a 97 liner)
♦️Genre: smut, fluff,, bf Jaehyun, uni au
♦️Warnings: rough sex, nipple play(?), slight cock warming, squirting, overstimulation, multiple orgasms, badly written smut lmao, mentions of RuPaul’s Drag Race bc I’ve been binging on it after Netflix put all the seasons on!!!
♦️Word count: 3,981
♦️Story: Finals are done and you finally have proper time with your boyfriend Jaehyun but he barely pays you any attention. He won’t even give you a kiss you because of a stupid mobile game.
Note: A request by anon for bf!Jaehyun. Also, yeaaah, this isn’t proof read, sorry for the shitty aftercare and the shitty writing in general lol. Tell me what you guys think, please! I’d love feedback so I can improve hehe <3
"Kiss me." You say as you push yourself up closer to your boyfriend’s face, who was currently focused on his phone as he laid next to you in your bed, playing whatever mobile phone game he was addicted to with the guys. It was kind of annoying, really.
You purse your lips and make kissy sounds, making him chuckle. You roll your eyes at him but he doesn’t notice, because he was too focused on his phone. You couldn’t believe how he’d rather play with his phone and his friends rather than spending time with you, his girlfriend, despite it being a free Sunday for the both of you. Finals were fucking finally over for all of you after the two of you, along with your friends had spent every day studying (more like cramming) to try and ace your tests.
It was safe to say the two of you hadn’t had sex in a while. Plus, this was your only time alone together after a while as your roommate, Jihyo was on a date with her boyfriend, Eunwoo. Jihyo was a bit anal about you bringing in Jaehyun to your dorm to have sex after she had caught you and Jaehyun fucking a few times (it was more than a few times, honestly). You couldn’t hold it against her because she never had sex with Eunwoo in your dorm. Ever. Or not that you know of.
You pinch Jaehyun’s side, making him yelp but he barely spares you a glance. You pucker your lips again and make kissy faces at him, trying to annoy him more than anything at this point. Jaehyun tilts his head towards you, eyes still focused on the screen of his phone as he blindly pecks at your face, kissing your nose instead of your lips like you wanted to.
Feeling annoyed, you grab the phone out of his hands and turn it off. You set his phone on your nightstand, straddle him and cup his cheeks, squishing and pinching it with your hands. His hands automatically make his way to your hips as he looks up with you with a less than pleased expression.
“I was about to beat Mingyu and Jungkook, you know,” he grunts in annoyance, taking hold of your hands that started to pinch his cheeks painfully. He pulls your hands off his cheeks and intertwines his fingers with yours.
You laugh, “Baby, today’s our free day. You can kill them some other time!” You started to grind your hips against his, testing the waters. You really wanted to take advantage of the time alone you had with the love of your life and do anything and everything you’ve wanted to do for the past few weeks. Also, fucking the built up stress away wasn’t a bad idea.
Jaehyun watches you, grinding and circling your hips, almost as if he was hypnotized. He bit his lip and gives you a pointed look, “I thought we weren’t allowed to have sex here anymore?”
You lean back and shrug, “Jihyo isn’t here anyways. What does she know?”
“Well Jungkook and Mingyu know how important my ranking is in that game to me. And they know I’m here with you.” Jaehyun chuckles, “they’re already probably going off in the group chat that we’re already fucking and you know Eunwoo’s in the chat too.”
You stop grinding on him, and sighed before blowing a raspberry, “I honestly don’t give a shit. Jihyo knows I’m putting RuPaul’s Drag Race over everything, including you so I could just say I forced you to watch.”
Jaehyun scoffs and looks at you as if he’s offended, “so you mean to say you finished the season we were watching WITHOUT ME?” He lets go of your hands and holds onto your thighs, squeezing.
You explode in laughter, knowing well that Jaehyun took offense in it. You both were big fans of the show that you’d do marathons of it together, especially the most recent All Stars season. “Trinity-“
He puts up a finger to your lips, “ok, spoiler queen. I don’t need to know. I’ll watch it for myself.”
“No, I’ll tell you right now! Trinity and Monet-“
Jaehyun puts his hands over his ears, closes his eyes and starts howling, and basically doing every annoying sounds he could produce, just to shut you up.
You laugh, trying to pull his hands away from his ear, telling him about the finale. Each second he goes on with his act, the more you found it funny so you ended up bellowing in laughter, weak as you fall down on his chest, shoulders shaking.
Jaehyun sighs as he wraps an arm around you, patting your head gently. “God, you’re annoying.”
Still in fits of giggles, you sit up again and hover over him, staring at him. Jaehyun was probably one of the most beautiful men you’ve ever seen in your life and you thought you were blessed to have been given a chance to be one of the people he loved in this world. “You love me, though.”
Jaehyun gives you a goofy smile, “that I do, sweetheart. So fucking much. You have no idea.”
“Prove it!”
“How?”
"Kiss me."
Jaehyun didn’t have to be told twice. His hands find its way on the back of your head, and he pulls you close while he lifts his head up to meet you halfway and locks his lips with yours.
You chuckle and proceed to kiss him. Deep and hard, always. His tongue swipes on your lower lip and you grant him access and soon your tongues wrapped around each other. You didn't know how long you were kissing but all you knew was you were already feeling dizzy and breathless but you just wanted to taste him again and again.
People might call you crazy but every time you saw him, he still gave you the butterflies he made you feel from the first time you saw him. That was how you knew you were already in love with him. You were so into in him that his mere touch sent shivers up your spine and when he makes love to you, you’re afraid you’ll burst into tears because of the overwhelming feelings he gives you.
You pull away and pull off the large t-shirt that you used as pyjamas. Underneath it, you weren’t wearing anything because you knew you’d be fucking your boyfriend. You shoot him a smile as you cup your breasts for him, earning a whistle from him. You knew he loved your nipples and right now, they looked too appetizing to him, already so hard and begging to be sucked by him.
He bites his lips at the sight of your naked and pliant body. He knew how conscious you were of your body but he loved how you trusted him too much that you were confident naked in front of him. He was thankful for that because for him it was a way to really say how much you trusted and loved him.
You grab his hands and rest them over your breasts as you start to circle your hips on him again. He had an obsession with you boobs that he would find a way to suck your nipples most of the time, that when you would sleep over at his dorm (which was better because the athletic department had budget and gave them solo rooms) even before you sleep, he sucks your nipples. It was endearing.
You were his and he was yours. As soon as he lets go of your nipples, you kiss his neck, making sure to rub you hard nipples against his chest as you pull up his shirt and help him fully take it off. He cups your face as you kiss and you rush to undo his jeans. You plant kisses down his neck, chest and stomach as you go lower, pulling down his jeans.
His half hard cock pops out as you pull down his underwear and help him get both his jeans and underwear off around his ankles until the both of you were buck naked. You settle between his legs, kissing his thighs, just taking your time but your hands find his cock, the tip leaking with clear liquid.
You spit on your hands, easing the friction and starting to jerk him off. You use the pad of your thumb to rub the slit of his cock, watching how his cock twitches and gets harder at the action. His dick continues to leak pre-cum, enough for you to spread it around the sensitive mushroom head of his shaft.
“Fuck, baby. Stop playing and suck it if you’re going to,” he hisses, fisting the sheets beside him.
“Ok, ok.” You laugh but you continue to play with his sensitive head. You gather your spit in your mouth and drop it slowly on the head of his dick, circling your tongue to the air so the spit goes around and covers the rest of his cock. “I’ll get your dick wet first, you big baby.”
Jaehyun moans as you start to jack him off, your left teasing the head and the right jerking the rest of his cock. He watches you as you bite your lips in concentration as you jerk him off, using the tricks that are fool proof to make him feel good. Especially that jerk-jerk-twist-jerk movement that had his hips bucking.
Without a word, you start to suck on his head, slurping on the salty precum, making him hiss in pleasure. You use your now free left hand to fondle on his balls as you keep jerking and sucking him off. When the moisture from your spit around the rest of his length dries, you slowly take him in your mouth, deep throating him.
You keep your thumb in your fist, trying to keep your gagging down as you used your left hand to hold onto the base of his cock as you take him deeper inside your mouth until your nose was touching his belly, his trimmed pubes prickling you.
Jaehyun was always amazed how you manage to take in his whole length but then again, you always managed to surprise him and managed to exceed his expectations which was one of the reasons for why he fell in love with you. Out of all the girls around him, you managed to catch his attention and he found himself unable to keep you out of his mind until the two of you got to work together since you were both in student government.
You lift your head a little and bob your head, keeping his dick down your throat, knowing this would surely cover the whole of his cock with your spit. Jaehyun had always been a loud grunter and moaner so it was no doubt that the room was filled with Jaehyun’s sounds of pleasure and curses as you make him feel good with your mouth. Once you couldn’t hold your breath anymore, you pull away from his cock.
You take the spit stringing your mouth to the head of his cock with your fingers and jerk him off. Jaehyun looks at you, mouth swollen, eyes lidded and tears forming at your ducts. You lean forward, rubbing the head of his cock against your nipples, making him groan at the sight. You take him in your mouth again, this time, just comfortably sucking him off, just taking in the length you could casually and jerk the rest of his shaft.
He grabs a hold of your head, pushing your pony tail back and tucking the strands that came apart from the vigorous bobbing of your head on his cock. Jaehyun starts to thrust his hips up so you stop moving, your arms on either sides of his hips on the bed, letting him fuck your face at his own pace. When he thrusts to particularly deep, you end up gagging and you pull away, coughing.
Jaehyun gasps in worry, immediately sitting up and cups your face. “Sorry, sorry! I didn’t mean to! I’m so sorry, sweetheart.”
You let out a giggle and peck his lips, “it’s ok, love.”
"So now, it’s my turn to please my lady." He grins as he kisses you on the cheek before he maneuvers you to the head of the bed and pushes you down until he was hovering over you and in between your legs. He licks the tips of his fingers and rubs at your clit, making you twitch. He reaches down and slips two of his fingers inside you with no warning, making you gasp. “You’re this wet for me, sweetheart? Well shit.” He grins at you, teasing as his he finds a comfortable paces to fuck you with his fingers.
You close your eyes, reveling in the sensation of his fingers stretching you and rubbing against your spot as you squeeze your breasts. God, he knew just how to make you feel so good, and you couldn’t wait for the main event: his cock but his fingers were doing more than good that you find yourself bucking against his hand as your orgasm comes over you fast, like it was unexpected that you didn’t realize you were cumming until it you started to scream and tremble.
“That was fast,” Jaehyun teases, pulling his fingers out of you slowly, watching your pussy juice stringing as he separates his fingers. He takes the fingers from inside you and shoves it in his mouth and licks it clean. It as a shame you couldn’t see it as you were still basking in the after effects of your orgasm, eyes pinched close. “I didn’t even touch your clit!” He says, giving you a teasing look. “You must’ve waited for this long, huh?”
You grin at him, but still trying to calm yourself down by taking deep breaths. “We haven’t had sex since Jihyo made us stop having sex here and finals was a bitch, Jae. I was stressed!” You close your eyes, clutching your chest dramatically.
Jaehyun laughs at you and kneels in front of you, lifting your hips and pulling you to him. He lifts your hips and settles it on top of his legs. You feel him line his cock to your slit and pushes his head in.
“Wait! I’m not ready yet!” You whimper, using your legs to push yourself off but his grip on your hips was strong and he had already pushed inside you, the whole of his length inside you. Your eyes roll back as his tip presses against your sweet spot but at the same time, the burn of the stretch makes you hiss in pain. He was never an easy size to begin with.
“Relax, babe.” He says gently as he takes a hold of your waist but you see how he has his eyes closed and his mouth agape. “You’re fucking tight.”
Still feeling the stretch, you lift your head and hit his hand on your waist, making him laugh. “You’re an asshole. I’m still sensitive.” You pouted.
“I know, love. Your pussy’s still throbbing.” He gives you a sweet smile and grabs your legs to wrap them around him. He takes his time, keeping his cock inside you while he takes his time into admiring your serene face and running his hands on your skin. “You ok?” He intertwines your fingers and plants kisses on the back of your hand, watching you remain silent with your eyes closed.
You eventually give him a sign but don’t answer him, instead, you smile at him as you squeeze your walls around his cock, making him wince. “Your cock is-AH!”
He starts to move his hips, just grinding do every roll of his hips, his cock hitting your sweet spot. "Ah, shit. You're so fucking tight." He groans as he finally pulls his hips back and drove into me slowly, bottoming out and slamming back in, making you moan at the sweet pressure inside.
You wrap your legs tighter around him as he moved his hips up, hitting your sweet spot at a different angle as he leans down and sucks at your nipples. Fucking Jaehyun wouldn’t be fucking him if he wasn’t sucking on your nipples while he was fucking into you. You keep his head close to you, as if you were holding a baby’s head sucking on its mother’s nipple. Honestly, with the amount of times he was sucking on your nipples, you wouldn’t be surprised if you started lactating out of the blue.
He lifts your legs as he starts slow but deep thrusts and puts both of your legs over his shoulders as he leans down, basically folding you in half. He captures your lips while his hips pick up pace. He kisses the sensitive spots on your neck as he builds up a steady pattern of fucking you, making you eyes roll back in pleasure. He licks the skin from you ear to my neck, making you shiver and buck your hips, easily receiving his hard cock.
He eventually goes into full force and you’re left to nothing but a moaning mess as he drives his hips to yours forcefully and in a pace beyond what you could handle. He was so deep inside you that you could the sweet pressure of his hard cock jabbing your cervix.
You claw at his back and grabbing onto whatever you could, holding on for dear life as he drives into you relentlessly, with his hands lifting up your hips for easier access. "F-fu...fuck! Ah! Soooo goo-...ood! Ah!!"
He pulls out and you groan at the loss of his cock inside you.
"Jaehyun, no," You groan desperately as he smirks at me.
"Patience, love." He smiles and lies on his back, making me straddle him.
Needing no words, you straddle him and slip down his length, releasing a sigh of pleasure at the fullness you’re feeling. You lean down and kiss him and he settles his hands on your ass cheeks, massaging and slapping. You pull away, moving your hips slowly, forward and backward, taking him in deep inside. You lean your head back, moaning from the pleasure.
He leans forward and sucks your left nipple and plays with your nipple with his hands, rolling the hard pebble with his fingers, pulling and squeezing. He groans in pleasure as you tighten your walls around him. He moves to your riģht nipple and sucks, and gives the same treatment as he did with your other nipple.
Jaehyun then pushes you down towards him and holds you tight as he starts thrusting hard and fast from below you. You squeal at the intense, hard pleasure coming in, giving you no room to breathe.
"JAEHYUN!!!!" You scream as you push your hips down to meet his thrusts and take him in any deeper, if it was possible. "FucK! AHH!!" You let myself go and my body becomes limbless at the excessive pleasure. You feel the drool escape your lips as you lean your face on the crook of his neck.
Without effort, he maneuvers you off of him and throws you on the bed then kissing every exposed inch of my skin he could reach. Once he reaches down, he doesn’t hesitate and proceeds to eat you out like a fucking maniac, making you scream and shiver in so much pleasure. There were lots of things Jung Jaehyun did well and one of the top things besides academics, basketball, cooking and fucking, eating you out would be included. And it didn't help that he knew your body like the back of his hand.
"Jaehyun! I'm cummimg!" You scream and before he could react, you were trembling, already in your second orgasm of the day. He never stopped sucking on your clit and started fingering you again, jus jabbing at your sweet spot while you were on the verge of your orgasm. You wanted to keep away but he had your hips on hold. Pretty soon, you felt it coming again and this time, you ended up squirting.
He looked pretty proud of himself after you were left a shivering mess. “There we go, good girl!” He smiles, kissing the back of your hand. “I told you I’d make you squirt, right?” The last time you had sex, knowing it’d be while before you could again, the two of you had rented a room and tried every position you wanted to try out and tried finding out your limits. He had made you squirt then and you both were amazed after seeing it once so he had promised you that he would be making you do it again.
“Jihyo’s gonna be so fucking mad when she gets home…” you trail off, still a bit high from your orgasm. “God, I’m dead. I need to find a new roommate.” You take a deep breathe, “also, I think… I’m gonna pass out.”
Jaehyun laughed, “at least let me cum before you pass out!”
“I fucking hate you right now.” You could feel the slight sheen of sweat on your body, besides from the body liquid you just expelled earlier.
“Excuse me, Ms. Y/N? You were the one that wanted this, remember?”
You wanted to pass out but you were sure Jaehyun wasn't over yet and besides, you always wanted Jaehyun’s cum inside you. It wasn't done until he came inside you. “Fuck me now, come on.” He immediately enters you and starts working his hips in a pace fast and hard.
"Fuck! Slow down!" It was too good that you could feel fresh tears drip down your temple. "Wait!!! Jaehyun" You try to push him away to at least slow him down but he holds you tighter and drives into you harder, constantly pressing against your g-spot. It was honestly like his cock was made for your pussy as he’s always hitting the places inside you that made you see stars.
"Ah, fuck! Your pussy so fucking tight for me!" He exclaims, followed with a plethora of curses as he does a steady pace of strong, deep, fast thrusts. He kisses you and holds tight on your breasts, squeezing them.
"I'm cumming!" You scream as you quickly cum on his cock which triggers his orgasm as well, but he keeps his shallow thrusts until he's emptied his cum all inside of you, filling you a few weeks worth of cum, filling you to the brim that some spill out even though his cock acted as a plug.
He stays inside you as the two of you kiss again, lazily this time, so you both could catch your breaths too. "I love you, y/n." He smiles at you, kissing your chin.
You laugh at his sweetness as you focus on breathing to slow down your fast heartbeat. Was it because of his words or your exhaustion? Or both? But you did know the exhaustion was taking over you. You close your eyes, basking in the warmth of his body against yours. Your ears were blocked and you were still trembling but you weren’t complaining.
Jaehyun knew you so he wasn’t expecting your reply and he already knows your answer anyways. Pretty soon, you quickly fall asleep, surprising him. But it was understandable because he made you spent so he cleaned up after you, wiping your body and your crotch with a warm towel and dressing you in panties and one of the shirts he’s left intentionally after he had cleaned himself up. It was the least he could do.
From Jung Jaehyun | 10:30AM
To Cha Eunwoo
So, what are you willing to do for me not to tell y/n I caught you and Jihyo fucking after ur gf made us stop fucking in their dorm? Send me your most expensive skin, Cha and try to beat me!
#Jaehyun smut#jung jaehyun#jaehyun#jung yoonoh#nct smut#nct jaehyun#Jaehyun fluff#nct fluff#uni au#nct au#Jaehyun au#Jaehyun x reader#requested#nct scenarios#nct scenario#nct imagines#nct imagine#Jaehyun imagine#Jaehyun imagines#Jaehyun scenario#jaehyun scenarios#cha eunwoo#mingyu#jungkook#jihyo#97 line lol
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my mind makes noises
20th Feb 2021,
last night i had a weird dream. im a big fan of Primeval and since i was young, Abby and Connor have been one of my top OTPs. late last year i binged the whole series, start to finish. in my dream last night i can remember being chased across the green of a park, by some tough guys i think?? i distinctly remember checking my phone and i had done 11,000 steps. then Abby pulls up in her car and i hop in, and we speed away to safety down a highway. we stop off at a gas station for some snacks, then catch up with Connor at an office block. it's dark out, and we're being chased around. crawling through air vents and looking round corners. something must have come through an anomaly, or we'd upset the guy in charge. i remember a man in a suit too.
i actually found the energy to get washed and dressed when i woke up. but when i did wake up, i didn't feel so good. physically fine but mentally not. i feel down, sad and terrible but for no apparent reason. i hate it when this happens, and it happens too often. im sat wearing the Pale Waves tshirt dad got me for my 18th, listening to their All The Things I Never Said EP. dad loved Pale Waves and we even went to see them together. i think that was the day that his illness really sunk in for me, and was the last day we really went out and spent together before he had a rapid decline. for the longest time it was so painful listening to them, because it just reminded me of better and happier times. i didn't want to listen to their new album because i was scared i would break down crying. but now Who Am I? has charted in the top 3, which is incredible for only their second album. im so proud of them and i know that dad would be too. i think after this EP, im going to listen to their first album while i do some more reading. i feel like i owe it to my dad and is the least i can do. maybe i feel so sad because i miss him so much: "i swear that i'll never stop loving you, and i'll die by your side if you want me to" <3
i can see why a Pale Waves stan i know of loves Drive so much. i wish i could load myself into a car and drive off into the night, company by my side, either shouting along to music or in dead-but-comfortable silence. the last song kind of got me and just added to the aura im feeling. "i wonder what it's like to die", me too. a wonder on my mind constantly since i was 11, ran through my hands twice. Adam Ant said that Kurt Cobain was brave for killing himself, a sentiment i think about often; Clara saying "let me be brave" suddenly has an entirely new meaning. i think today is Kurt's birthday too, so happy birthday man. i hope you're having a party up there with everyone i love. my album listening session was heavily interrupted when i was asked what i wanted from the shops, as mum's bf was going to get stuff. can a girl never find peace?? apparently not in reality or mentally.
something just happened to me. there i was making my lunch, watching the first episode of Ealing Comedies - a series REG did on films he loves - and the intro of episode one is running. he's telling us what's going on, and has some clips from all three episodes. and out of nowhere, i see REG sat next to Peter Capaldi. Peter is one of my heroes and favourite people ever, his Doctor has taught me so much and is my blueprint. every time i see him i cry. but not this time. instead i let out the most high pitched squeal, collapsed to my knees and started shaking, looking at the tv with so much awe and love. before me were arguably my two favourite men sat together and i didn't anticipate or expect it. it took me by such shock and is all im going to think about for the rest of today. i also had an idea for a Withnail And I-esque film, of two people bunking together but not by choice. one is straight and every archetype of a cis, straight person, constantly giving passing comments of abuse to their flatmate who's as gay, queer, non confirming as they come. both want different things in life and are two opposite ends of the same spectrum. only to discover the "anti gay" was actually gay this whole time, and was deathly scared of themselves and their truth. i also have a bag of cashews to devour now, so some faith has been restored to my world. but not much, mind you.
left my house at 4.11 pm for a walk, didn't get back until about 5.30 pm. it was incredible. as i walked to Sturmer traversing squelchy mud, Hyperspace - Beck was playing in my ears. it's one of my favourite and one of the most important albums to me, i only listen to it on special occasions. felt a little sad listening to it and it reminded me of better times with G/R/E but that's okay. i really do miss them. i sat on a log for 15 minutes and let the album finish; then i sprung into action, found a big stick to use as a walking stick, and walked home through sturmer listening to the Withnail And I soundtrack. there was something so beautiful and liberating about listening to it while walking through a village, all by myself, sun setting behind me. i felt genuinely happy. i felt like i was in the film, at Crow Crag myself, walking in their footsteps. luckily there was no randy bull or chicken to kill for supper. just beautiful music that adorned a huge smile over my heart.
today has been a day of firsts for me, as it's also been the first day ive almost cried while taking the wrapper off a dvd. i just got done watching Logan, and i don't normally care about marvel, but i was actually invested in and really enjoyed it. but before anyone had uttered a word i was almost in tears, because i felt guilty unwrapping it. my dad got it and i presume he wanted to see it at some point. sadly he never got the chance. i only wanted to watch it purely because REG was in it, and i really wish he could have sat and watched it with me. i was also back to hugging my pillow for emotional support too. but the thing that stung the most was (spoiler) that Logan found his daughter, and his daughter watch him die. i may not have been my dad's daughter, but i know what it's like to experience that. i've really been missing him a lot today.
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Can you tell us 10 things about you? and about ur friends irl? How u met them/ how long u know them/ what u like to do with them? This is gonna sound nosy but how's ur love life hdjsks LISTEN YOU'RE LIKE MY DREAM BEST FRIEND AND I WANT TO KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU AND ACT LIKE WE'RE TOTES HOMIES OKAY IM A VIRGO SUN PISCES MOON smh a girl is cURIOUS AND (platonically) IN LOVE WITH YOU 😖❤❤❤❤
Hey there!! 💕💓❤️ Oh wow!!!! 💕💓❤️💕💓❤️ Don’t worry this is fine!! I’m actually -- like, really happy and giddily flustered you’d want to get to know me!? 💕💓❤️ I’m really flattered and really grateful/touched aaaaaaa only virgo/pisces deserve rights, my current wife is also a virgo/pisces this is obviously some kind of synastry destiny (jk *wink wonk?*)!! 💕💓❤️thank you for caring about me!!! 💕💓❤️💕💓❤️💕💓❤️💕💓❤️
Yeah sure!! 💕💓❤️I can tell you more things about me!! 💕💓❤️
Disclaimer? I think it’s good for the audience to know where I’m coming from and who I am? I just think transparency/knowing who you’re talking to is important because knowing who I am, can also help you and me see where my flaws are and where I may be coming from! 💕💓❤️ Or what I provide, but where I might miss my mark somewhere, y know? 💕💓❤️ Not to say you have to judge me, I just don’t see the point in not just being who I am and saying yeah I can see where I took the L there. It’s just-- better? for future endeavors as well? So here we are?
More about me? In sections?
10 things about me?
I’ll start with this since it’s the shortest!
This may come off as totally random but I do better in colder climate than hotter ones -- even though I currently live in a tropical island
I used to live in the US!
I actually have a designated place where I go to sit, open up my laptop and answer asks from tumblr. I sit outside my little patio and stare out at my garden, and then answer qs from here!
This means I’m always subjected to the Wild Life coming at me unexpectedly sometimes, but my cat also visits me at my table! So it balances out!
My favourite drink is milk but I like plant-based ones, or rice milk? Or the lactose free ones! They’re delicious!
Cherries are my favourite snacks but I usually get them once every 3 months -- so the result is I don’t tend to snack often. This is by design of me trying to Not Snack + using my pickiness to weaponize against myself and my eating habits.
To unwind I watch cat/animal videos on youtube before I go to sleep - it’s not very effective because I have to keep my eyes open to see, plus I always end up making cooing noises at the screen -- so I’m not sure when if it’s actually making me sleepy or not. But it’s working so far so I’m continuing to do it.
I have very specific knowledge of certain things in very acute details + link/resources of further studies on the topic, but otherwise I have 0.5 braincells most of the time, just a lot of Forbidden Knowledge.
I have a folder of cursed memes and that’s all you need to know about my sense of humour I think?
Love life?
I am currently single! 💕💓❤️ Gf application is always open! 💕💓❤️ However, I’d like everyone of you to know I’m a 95 liner and I will not accept applications from those born after 98′ 💕💓❤️
Although I’m bi + had ex-bf before... I am (as of right now) on the fence about men personally in my personal life (disclaimer) because I’ve got a week of quarantine, thus I haven’t been doing the do and can think clearly for once. I am contemplating. Men. And the necessity in life. Y know?
Although my love life is free!! I am not excused from the occasional panic of having a crush (annually). I’m lucky enough to go through it just once every year, but every time it happens I am an absolutely clown + always in turmoil. It’s what happens when you’re a sag venus who can’t control your p***y brain. Luckily, my crush just have to insult me or make me explain things from my past and then I’d be too traumatize to crush on them again. It’s quite effective, and works out best for all of us! 💕💓❤️
I’ll refrain from talking about my ex because I know I have a habit of recounting the good and being mushy. Even if we ended it on rocky terms. So! I’ll save everyone from that. 💕💓❤️
Friends (expanded, clarifications?)
The ones I mention on the blog are usually
taurus/taurus,
cancer/cancer,
leo/libra,
leo/cap (x2),
virgo/sag,
libra/aries (x2),
scorpio/sag,
scorpio/cap,
sag/taurus,
pisces/scorpio,
pisces/aqua,
Oof that’s alot.. This might be better to outline in a timeline format... so leo/libra, scorpio/sag, libra/aries and partially virgo/sag are whom I grew up for the majority of my childhood-teenage life! 💕💓❤️
They obviously made a very big impact on me! 💕💓❤️ They’re with me through thick/thin, leo/libra (sag rising) is the extrovert of the bunch. He’s one of my best friends, close guy friend, most of the time I too find him a little exasperating because he’s.. well its his problem so nevermind, but he’s also very endearing! 💕💓❤️ If it wasn’t for him-- well, there’s also another leo I thought was very endearing in a little brother kind of way. So leos to me have a very positive influence in my life, they’re very cute especially when they ask for your attention. I think they are like puppies/kitties when they are needy, and their blatant way of just being themselves always makes me feel refreshed + I admire them for it. In the end, I’m totally heart-eyes endeared for Leos! 💕💓❤️
Scorpio/sag is also my best friend! 💕💓❤️ She’s a taurus rising, and she’s so sweet, kind, chatty and very open/friendly to people! 💕💓❤️ Her, my cousin (who’s also a scorpio but a scorpio/pisces), and quite a few of my other best friends who are scorpios - actually made me realize they’re not like what they’re usually describe as. Maybe that’s just me? But I think they’re very sweet and comforting to be around, not to mention they’re quite supportive and willing to listen when you’re having a tough time with something!! 💕💓❤️The pillar of support and one of the few rare people I don’t mind interacting with (actually crave interacting with them) because of just how chill they are, I wish more people recognize that in a scorpio! 💕💓❤️
Libra/Aries is one of my longest childhood friend, probably from birth! 💕💓❤️ He’s a supportive big brother type figure. But he can be very silly and he doesn’t hold himself so seriously most of the time! 💕💓❤️ Whilst he’s very understanding and quite nosy with others, he tries to be subtle/sleek but he isn’t! I think he’s very endearing when he wants to be, and he deserves someone who loves him lots as well 💕💓❤️ We reunited for the first time in 6 years the other day? And I think we both ended up crying a little and holding hands because we miss each other alot! 💕💓❤️ It was very nice, I think he’s much more emotional (just suppressed) than what people realize! 💕💓❤️ He’s very caring though - like willing to talk you through your problems and make sure you’re taken care of, back on your feet, but also willing to smile scarily at people who’ve hurt you and actually take them to court/yell at them for you. I think its very sweet! 💕💓❤️
Virgo/Sag is someone I hung out with for a short period of time, but kept in contact with periodically throughout my life because we ended up going through similar majors/path in life! 💕💓❤️ She’s someone who’s very caring, wants to take care of you, when she’s endeared by you she makes sure to dote on you often! 💕💓❤️ Actually, she’s born a day after Namjoon I think? But that’s not the point, the thing is - she’s my virgo/sag and when she’s not by my virgo/sag she’s super cool and I can see that many of our friend respects her/think she’s very mature + she’s the Shit! 💕💓❤️ I really admire her too and I think she’s super cool, but more than that, I love how caring and tender she is. She’s the best 💕💓❤️
These are the people I grew up with, and then I went to college and met/lived with Scorpio/Cap + Pisces/Scorpio+Aqua.
Scorpio/Cap and I actually hit it off since the first day? We were in orientation, and we’re both talkative I guess! But in similar ways. He appreciates my bluntness/sense of humour and I like that he’s sarcastic and the only one engaging enough to be around/paying attention to what’s happening. We went to a house party together and then had 1 class together the semester. After that, me and him decided we’d live together off campus (along with our other friend who fell through, I think he’s a Leo?) - whilst we lived together we share majors in the same division, on holidays or at night after class, we’d grab dinner together + walk there, or we’d eat at home and binge watch a marathon he’d pick together. 💕💓❤️ It’s really fun! 💕💓❤️
Both of us like cooking, so he’d make dishes/drinks and I’d do that and we’d coerced each other to hang out in the living space together. Basically, we’re there to force each other to socialize/hang out with people and also encourage each other. It’s very fun! But we also had moments where we’d buy each other dinner/go to art galleries/exhibit together. There’s more serious too of course, like talking about our problems or worrying about stuff. But I think I found someone who looks out for me/I can look out for him, be confidants for each other and not be embarrassed with each other. Besides this, he also found my p0rn collection and suddenly mentioned it when we’re on campus so now I can never unfriend him because he has blackmail material on me. I’m forced to be his friends forever now.
Pisces/Cap and Pisces/Aqua are my roommates after Scorpio/Cap - actually, Pisces/cap invited me to live with them when I was finding a place, it was very fortunate! 💕💓❤️ We’re all close friends because we live in the same hall during first year, plus me and Pisces/cap (and a Gemini friend) would get drunk + go to parties together so!! This is very convenient! 💕💓❤️
Actually.. Pisces/cap, me and Gemini friend.. I went with Gemini friend to buy his apartment with him (along with his friends, I’m good friends with them too) and Pisces/cap went with him to buy furnitures lmao! 💕💓❤️ And then me and Pisces/cap moved in together, although I didn’t room with them. I roomed with Pisces/Aqua whom till this date is my favourite roommate I’ve ever lived with! 💕💓❤️
It’s a little messy with Pisces/Cap but not in a? bad way? at all? Like we’re close friends who still talk often, but they did confess once over the holidays, and I turned them down (that was when I was about to move in) - we did make out along with pisces/aqua but like.. that’s... I guess that’s normal for college y know? We did a couple projects together for their class, like a comic about me and gemini friend, poems, photography, I drew them something. And I think they did have something with Gemini friend as well but! Gemini friend moved away on the last year so it never went anywhere there.
But these are all good memories we had together and it’s not like-- bad at all, I don’t ever think badly at them for it because it was honest to them/for them, it was their emotions and tenderness from the heart? I can’t ever look down on anyone for that or judge them for being true to themselves, I actually think they’re very brave to be able to heal themselves and process things especially involving emotions like that. I also think these are all precious and honest memories, being friends with them definitely helped me grow my EQ by so much. Without them, I’d be very close-minded today! 💕💓❤️
Pisces/aqua is my roommate for a long time, and I love them to bits too! 💕💓❤️ They have two cats, both I love so so much and would sacrifice getting up for very often! 💕💓❤️ More than that, Pisces/aqua is so smart and able to pick things up immediately! It’s honestly very admirable, how they pierce things together. Whether it’s tarot or astrology, they’re the one who got me into this actually? 💕💓❤️ It was their interest before it became mine through proxy or maybe osmosis lmao, but they’re quite judgey and sometimes have a ? idk, superiority complex/elitist attitude towards stuff sometimes? So I never really talked about it much with them because it can get really frustrating sometimes 💕💓❤️ I do love them lots though, I can be ignorant of a lot of things and really slow on the uptake, but they’re very nice and kind and patient with me - honestly they’re as patient as a saint sometimes with me. And I’m really really thankful to them for it! 💕💓❤️ They’re getting married this year to a Scorpio! 💕💓❤️
Taurus/taurus and Cancer/cancer are my college best friends. Actually we hang out outside of class too! 💕💓❤️ I celebrated cancer/cancer’s birthday with them and their friends/roommates and it’s really fun. Heres why it’s -- like, momentous. It’s because my college classmates are more like colleagues or co-workers, so we don’t usually have that kind of camaraderie outside of first year. Plus, we’re all kind of working or busy with our private life outside of class - so it’s hard to reconvene that with who you know in classrooms.
They like their private life separated from the college one, which is what I prefer as well. I really adore them though, since we have a major that usually makes us get little to no sleep and have to stay at school at night-till morning most nights (for programs on the computer or printing facilities, rip) -- they’re the one who would either stay up with me, working together at the same table and we can ask each other for fresh eyes on our work. Or they’d motivate me to go home and not be stupid to stay at school. Or they’d drive me home so they know I get back safely/on time. It’s just -- I adore them so much they’re very very good! 💕💓❤️
Taurus/Taurus is also a college best friend whom I befriended later on in the years, they’re really sweet! 💕💓❤️ We have more of a friendship where we spend time outside together, walking in the city trying out a new cake store or just going back to their place to play games or talk about what else we have going on in our lives. They’re really busy!! Since they’re involved in church activities, they travel to another town an hour away every sunday - their dedication to their work, school and church (AND spending time with their fiance’s family + fiance) is amazing! 💕💓❤️ They also got me my first job at the firm they’re working in, in our last years - I made sure they’re not too tired and get their work done on time so they don’t rush their finished project. Or give better advice if the teacher is making them fume. I really like them lots too, we had alot of fun together AND they’re a foodie! 💕💓❤️
There’s another Libra/Aries whom I knew from college, while I was still living with Scorpio/Cap - I was in another town/not the same town as the Pisces back then. But Libra/Aries was close and she’d come by often! We’d travel the city together, lay on the lawn, go to parks together or exhibit. They’re very proactive and we spend a lot of time talking about work and projects, personal interests, when we watch movies together - we’d spend time sitting in cafes after watching them to talk for hours/until closing about the movie ( ‘we have alot to unpack’) -- they’re a lot of fun to talk to because they’re just as intense about stuff! 💕💓❤️ And their interest is genuine, give good hugs, a little too loud for our cats but she means well! 💕💓❤️
This is brief recount of everyone, mostly focusing on activities we did together but knowing them as people obviously made a big impression on me! 💕💓❤️
Leo/Caps are people I met since I finished college/working now, they’re my two admins on the blog actually! 💕💓❤️So internet friends, but I really click with and they’re soothing + fun to be around when I’m home/anywhere! 💕💓❤️
Sag/Taurus is also another internet friend, I’ve known her for a year now? But man, every conversation is an adventure and she’s so fun to be around! 💕💓❤️ Also very sweet and an extremely kind person, in a fire sign kind of way. Which means a lot of gawking from me and very loud laughs. But yes! 💕💓❤️ Very good people! 💕💓❤️
I do have friends from work... but well we’re not close enough for me to actually consider them good friends/talk about them personally? They’re nice! But I have yet to form a more positive opinion about them - it’s positive and negative, so I’ll see who survives and come through as a person I’d like to hang out with outside of work. 💕💓❤️
To Virgo/Pisces anon:
Here’s my best friend application do I make the cut please reply 💕💓❤️
#about me#phew this took a while to answer!#virgo/pisces anon#are we best friends now pls tell me#anon#asks
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i was tagged by @biwithabob (<3)
♡ what do you prefer to be called name wise? Louise
♡ when is your birthday? March 7
♡ where do you live? south west of england
♡ three things you are doing right now? watching uno videos on youtube, texting my bf and drinking water
♡ four fandoms that have piqued your interest right now? i binged She-Ra and the Princesses of Power season 1 today lol, also asoue bc im reading the books, never have i ever, and phineas and ferb
♡ hows the pandemic treating you? in the grand scheme of things not terribly bc im just chilling at home with my family but i havent been able to properly see and spend time with my bf in 3 and a half months which sucks bc normally when im at home instead of uni we see each other every day
♡ a song you can’t stop listening to right now? honestly just the whole of sleepyhead by cavetown but especially snail and trying
♡ recommend a movie? this question is hell but over the hedge for no reason other than the creator follows me on twitter and i respect that
♡ how old are you? 20
♡ school, university, occupation, other? im doing a degree in international relations and ive just finished my second year, i also have a job as a waitress at my local theatre that i normally do when not at uni
♡ do you prefer hot or cold? cold, i overheat really easily in hot weather and i love being cuddled up under blankets and pillows and duvets. i still like it when its hot and sunny but given the choice id pick cold
♡ name one fact others may not know about you? i can solve a rubiks cube in under 90 seconds, which isnt crazy fast for cube solving but im proud of it bc i didnt even know how to solve it at all a year ago
♡ are you shy? yeah but im getting better at engaging socially despite my shyness, especially when it comes to adult things like sorting out bills and whatnot instead of just avoiding everything
♡ do you have any preferred pronouns? i use she/her or they/them but primarily she/her, they/them pronouns is something i wanted to explore more but was always too scared to mention it to people irl so i pretty much just use them online lol
♡ any pet peeves? i hate the sound of people eating, its not too bad if im eating too but if im not it just sounds awful to me
♡ whats your favorite “dere” type? i only know tsundere and yandere and neither of those seem good to me?
♡ rate your life 1-10. eh probably like a 6 or 7, im pretty happy with it rn but it took a long time to get here
♡ what’s your main blog? this one
♡ list your side blogs and what they are used for. @extramundanely is my ~aesthetic~ blog lol its not really a coherent aesthetic i just reblog things i find pretty so i can have a space on tumngle that only has things that make me happy
♡ is there anything you think people need to know about you before being friends with you? im bad at talking to people regularly and i rarely send messages in group chats but i still love all my friends even if its been a while and i still wanna be included im just quiet and shy
im gonna tag @whattheforkdude @alienpopcorn @sp-ace-ie @slightly-confused-cat and @rubberbandballqueen
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Youtuber!Jisung
summary: we’re both youtubers and i don’t know you personally, but i watch your videos on occasion and we’re both pretty well known on youtube and i mentioned you being cute Once and now our ‘fans’ ship us
(A/N) hey kids im bacc with another scenario! and its for jisung ! this wasnt requested but i wanted it so im writing it :D i hope you enjoy i love u all also blease leave me feedback (ps,, my time is now going to b spent on hs tutor mark and then uhh prince chenle and then bf jisung but idk when i’ll have them out so be patient please!!! love you <3)
so obviously jisung would be that youtube channel filled with dance covers and just videos of him dancing
some videos would include the rest of the dreamies dancing with him
or just random videos,, like vlogs
his channel is like his little own archive so he can watch these videos when he gets older
like he doesnt care if people watch him he just wants to share these vids of him dancing and doing weird shit with his friends
but he’s well known around youtube anyway
so where do you come in?????/
you’re also a youtuber
but you dont really know jisung
you do watch his videos sometimes because hes crazy talented
and a little awkward but its endearing and cute
you tend to binge watch his videos when you’re bored
um,,, your youtube channel is basically like his
except its more of vlogs and everyday life videos
you dance sometimes (and if you dont just pretend that you do HAHA)
anyway
so one day you wake up with a billion notifications
and a lot of messages from your friends
‘check your twt y/N BLEASE’
and youre s o confused
and you see that you’ve gained a lot of subscribers or whatever overnight and you’re just????? why???
then you open up twitter and then you see it
‘omg i ship y/n with jisung ! they would be so cute together AHHH’
someone tweeted that
you have never been more confused because you don’t think you’ve mentioned him in your videos
you do watch him as stated above but like,,,, whats goin on
your phone dings and you see that you got a text from ur bestie
‘watch this RIGHT NOW’ and attached to it is a youtube link
so you click on it and its a video from jisung and the title is uhhh
‘Q&A with my 🅱️ros 😩💯👊’
so ur just laughing and shit and ur like halfway through the video
and you’re wondering why your friend sent it to you
but then theres this question
‘do you watch other youtubers??? if so who?’
and you can see jisung turn red
and its so CUTE
but then he says something that like,,,,,,,, SHOCKS you
fat oof
‘u-um i watch y/n’s channel a lot! they’re super talented and i mayhaps think that they’re cute,,, or whatever,,,,,’
and then it becomes quiet
‘ANYWAY’ - probably donghyuck
and you pause the video and you SCREAM
cause in ur videos u act like a total crackhead i mean if ur on this website then ya ur a certified crackhead
then you start to text ur friend and you’re freaking out
its all incoherent words and keyboard smashes
but then on twt ur just like,,,, ‘@ jisungstwthandle i think you’re cute or whatever too’
EVERYONE IS RIOTING CAUSE !
when jisung gets the notification hes screaming
‘JAEMIN LOOK’
‘mhm mhm’ hes not even paying attention to jisung
after that tweet you post another that says ‘reply what i should do for my next video kids !’
a lot of people say a collab with jisung
others say q&a
SO you don’t really want to bother jisung so you stick to the q and a idea
and then you say to tweet you with uhhh wutevr hashtag with a question and you’ll answer it in a video
you’re not surprised when you see tons of questions asking about jisung
‘so first question,,,, ‘what do you think about jisung???’
you just quietly laugh before you start talking
‘i watch his videos all the time! he’s crazy talented so if you don’t already watch him,,, what r u doing ! plus he’s so awkward that its endearing and i dont know, hes cute or whatever’ and then you wink at the camera
when you post this video jisung watches it
and then when he gets to that part of the video about that question abt him
HE BLUSHES CAUSE OF YOUR WINK
‘jisung why are you red’
‘nothing go away’
so after a few weeks all of it dies down
people still think yall would b cute together
but its more mellow
then ! jisung posts a pic on twt saying that he’ll have a special collab posted on yt soon!
and the picture is of two pairs of legs LMAO
everyone is just ??? cause who could it b
no one suspects its you cause you two ‘havent interacted’ for weeks
what they don’t know is that you and jisung actually started to talk more!
so much to the point where you guys are doing a surprise dance collab
hehahhehskdfh
so when jisung drops that youtube video
everyone is screaming, crying, wigless
cause your guys’ dynamic really does go well together
after that you two hang out a lot and he becomes part of your yt videos a lot
vice versa with you in his
everyone loves the both of you its really heart warming cause everyone can see how whipped you two are for each other just not,,, you guys smh
so!!!! its been like months and you can confidently say that jisung is part of your life
and you may or may not of developed a crush on him
he may or may not have developed a crush on you too
but you dont say anything
oh my god open your ears blease
anyway
in the comments you could see a lot of them being about the two of you
‘two they're so cute!!!!!!’
‘Blease Date Already’
sometimes you read them and you get so flustered just thinking about it
well one day you’re reading comments and u get a text from jisung
and he's asking if you want to do a q and a video together
since you guys haven’t done one together yet
so you both tweet about it blah blah whatever
when it comes to the filming you guys are loose and comfortable with each other
but then you stumble across this question that makes everything g so a w k w a r d
‘are you guys dating?’
jisung was drinking something but now he's choking and coughing
‘no! we are not dating BUT i do like jisung in that way’ and then you wink
and then you’re just s o casual about it ‘next question says-’
jisung’s heart is going into overdrive
yOu liKe mE OH mY gOd - his mind
‘jisung u ok there bud????’
and he just nods and smiles big to show that he is ok when he is intact /not/ okay
but anyway
you’re done filming and then you start to edit right after
jisung is just occasionally bringing you snacks but
don't think he FORGOT
cause he didn't !
‘y/n, did you really mean it when you said you liked me???’
then you stop clicking and then you look at him with a grin
‘of course i did jisungie!!!! i thought i was obvious mister’ and then you start laughing but then you go back to editing
‘i- uh, just wanted you to k-know that i like you too.’
‘i know’
‘HOW’
‘you’re friends with 6 demons sweetheart i been knew’
and jisung is dumbfounded and embarrassed
but hey at least you like him too hehehe
‘so.... y/n..... what are we???’
and ur just like hm we’ll be whatever you want us to be!
so then he smiles big ‘okay be my s/o’
‘ask me again in a week’ and his smile drops
‘I’M JUST KIDDING’ ASKJDFLASD
anyway now you’re together !!!!!!
so when you upload the video you put in the description box that !!! jisung asked you out while editing the video so yes! you guys are dating
everyone is not surprised but they’re all happy for you guys
but on camera jisung is too shy to do anything like kissing or whatever
the most HE’S ever done is hold your hand or hug you
but you???????? sis u really b out here
you kiss him on the cheeks
everywhere on his face
you smother him with love and he gets sooo shy
but everyone loves it cause you guys are so cute together
in the comments you get stuff like ‘wow they’re so CUTE makes me wanna throw up- iN A GOOD WAY’
when the dreams see you guys be too couple-y or whatever
‘you guys are children blease stop it’ - probably mark
but anyway!! i don’t think there would be a dull moment cause off and on camera
you guys would be dancing and popping everywhere
like,,,,, music is being played so you or jisung start dancing and the other joins in
i don't know i find yt jisung so wholesome cause he's got talent and him spreading his talent through videos on the inter webs is so cool !
Masterlist
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tagged by @turianfetishist and i kept forgetting 2 do it afauahs
and then i tried to commit suicide via peanuts so u know that’s how it be sometimes on this bitch of an earth
1. Whats the favorite item of clothing you own?
mmm do binders count as clothes bc if so that one BUT i also have this skirt that’s like a pastel galaxy it’s a #look
2. Tell me about the first time you watched your favorite movie?
hums one of my favorites rn is the new mlp movie(thank u tiny me 4 ur special interests that continue to kidnap me) and me andf my bf watched it when he came to visit AND IT WAS SO GOOD!!!! we went there after dinner and we looked all fancy to watch it and i had So Many Feelings™ tempest is,,,iconic and dramatic i love and support her
3. What was the last book you finished?
tbh tbh i usually read more fics than books recently bc im trash b u t i reread the darkstalker:legends and it’s,,,so good darkstalker is equal parts relatable and a trash child. the biggest trash child like what the FUCK my son
4. What is the next book you want to read?
mmmMM i think i wanna reread lotr tiny me fixated on it and it’s still good THAT OR i need to find the rest of the wof books 👀👀give me them dragons. esp the nightwings. i love them
5. When is your birthday and what do you want for it? (If your birthday has already happened this year did you get what your heart was set on?)
the sweet sweet release of death
okay so dramatic emo-ness aside my bday is on September 28th and Honestly there’s this pair of boots i high-key want bc it has that like. that feeling that if u wear them ur gonna get together a rag tag group and go be space pirates or smthin.
but if we go for non material things i want my bf to come for a visit bc he came for like a week or two last yr for my bday and now im like??? come back??? give me attention????? u done fucked up and now ur stuck with me so Come Back Fucker
6. If you were given one month and $10,000 where would you travel to?
JAPAN!! japan,,,, partly bc i was quite literally made in japan not born there just. made. (an i also want a tattoo that says that but that’s another story) AND ALSO the street fashion there is 👀👀 i can finally look weird and fit in yis
7. Cake or pie?
im not able to have either for awhile adsgsh but fucking. pumpkin pie HELL YES i can live off that
8. Name three things you think you’re good at.
being an annoyance
but mm art, writing sorta?? and sewing :v
9. Name three things youd like to be better at.
if someone could teach me how 2 be a ppl that’d be Great (bc apparently ur Not supposed to lick ur friends. sounds fake), cleaning tbh bc im Bad at that and uhh honestly i wish i knew how to skateboard bc it looks fun but i am useless at it
10. Name three far fetched dreams you’d like to do some day.
i rlly wanna write a novel someday tbh i have alllllll of the plans and plots for it just. gotta do it. don’t wanna do it that takes effort
i want to be friends with every lizard and snake :v THEYRE GOOD FRIENDS good scaly bois
and i Also wanna make some kind of break through in science either engineering or genetics, tiny me had plans for this cool ass robot and everything. but i do not understand the engineerings™
11. If you had to dye your hair what color would you die it?
i used to have the tips this bright blue and i loved it So prolly bright blue but listen
listen
the anime weeb part of me that binge watches psychopass
REALLY wants white hair so i can be a doomed anime protagonist bc thatd be Awesome™
an ill tag uhh @thecouncilwasright @electric-space-possum @erkthewanderer @theravenofwynter an @danceswithturians i don’t think y'all have been tagged but idk :v what is a memory
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5/5/19
Did not celebrate yesterday or today. Well other then my mom and I got Mexican carumbas food. She has been amazing to spend time around. My dogs are so sweet also today we went for a car ride and then have been by my side the last 3 days Iv been home sick.
Friday I met Travis my Bfs friend and saw avengers end game in theater. So lovely spending time with them before I got so so sick. Taken like 4 baths last 3 days and 1 shower today. Today my nose is raw and so Iv lubbed it up with Vic’s vapor rub and it burns and makes my nose extra runny but I can actually breath out of it.
My mom and I talked about why I have a weird habit of washing before bed. When I used to dance my mom would always tell me and my sister to wash (shower) or wash your feet before bed. And so my habit of washing before bed. If I don’t I get grossed out or itchy and uncomfortable. And Iv always had sensitive skin and sensitivity. So my mom calls me princess and the pea because I can feel any little piece of dirt in my bed and need to change the sheets. Im insane and hate sleep in other places without knowing it’s clean. Such a horrible annoying thing because my future husband will have to deal with my insaneness.
Today was a sunny day mostly then around like 2-3 pm it got cloudy overcast a bit and it was so lovely to sit outside in the backyard/garden. While I have been doing laundry and busy getting ready for the week my mom won’t stop watching game of thrones. She started around Easter weekend and it’s been about 2-3 weeks sense then and is already on season 5 middle season. She is binging hard and I’m impressed but worried about her health. But also that’s how I am so it’s a funny trait I get from her lol. I am caught up so I switched to watching YouTube.
So let me tell you, I have not watched YouTube in like 1-2 years as a habit I used to watch everyday like crazy. And all because of Charles Trippy who does daily vlogs. So now I’m catching up on you tubers I used to love. Like Zoella, Alfie days, Charles trippy and Gabriella etc. I love British youtubers more than American but also want to get into podcasts. Podcasts are the new it things and I need to be better informed in the involved worlds. But also I need to listen to podcasts for work so it makes sense to listen to some I actually like.
Iv done my nails today: red on hands and a cute while cream on toes with a nude sparkle to make them look less dead. I hate when people wear nail polish that makes them look dead and so I always make sure if I look dead I put a nude or different sparkle to it looks more interesting. Such a fussy person when it comes to my things.
Here is a lovely photo from my time at home:
Xoxo love muchly and sweet dreams as I am posting this somewhat late (aka 8:30pm) lol
Thanks for dealing with my ramble personal posts ❣️
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012019
Its been a while since i write here Maybe like 4 years ago. Perhaps it means i dont have too much to share about because life have been moving so fast i rarely have time to sit and write The things i do for the past years..oh if only i can share everything here
Today, i deactivated my facebook. Just felt like disconnecting after being on fb non stop for years. Well heres the thing,mi work on social media. Well technically ihave to be online almost everything i work on have to be updated and its overwhelming me.
Ive also been reconnecting with some old friends, some had a hard time, some starting their career, some quit, some was between looking for jobs and some was starting their own business…some are the same old same old.
Things have not been like what they post on fb, surprisingly some got divorced after a brief year, some remarried, some just got married after years of being single…
So really whats real anymore…?
Im losing friends i gain some, my life felt like a rollercoaster and now its stagnant as i arrive to the starting point again. Some times i feel like i dont fit in this world, some times i feel like im a fake, trying to be someone im not, some people really believe that i could be someone they want me to be, and i dont know what i want to be anymore.
Entering mid 30s and still have no clue where my life is going, i started binge watch himym again, and started watching netflix. It feels a bit familiar and comforting that i am watching series or movies again. Also writing again as i cringe to write my thoughts but have no laptop to write on…old school writing on paper is nice but after 3 page your hands are sore .i could write up to 6 page back then
Then i remember my ipad which i hardly use since i got my smartphone. And to have time to write is another struggle. I need a new laptop for that matter but i am asking myself what does it worth to spend on such an expensive laptop doing something thats only for writing.
Should i get a macbook air?should i be a writer? Should i do phd? Do i need a phd? Should i start a company? Do i really want to do a business in a job i hate? Should i find a bf lol..but i hate guys lol… Ok literally just the fact that everyone getting married sometimes annoy me…while i, genuinely happy for them..there will always be those who insist you should too. I cant even stand myself ..how am i supposed to let people in…and how do people get bf these days?
While im here, lets talk about the friends who move up their level,whom actually migrated and make something out of their life, although they are struggling..but look where they are now. I cant help to feel envy and hate myself for being stuck here.
Should i have stayed at my previous company and make my own name in that area, but i wouldnt have done what i have done the past years if i did. Whatever it may be, God is pushing me into someone that is really really confusing me sometimes. And here i am back to square one…
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boyfriend!minhyung
hi guys! i decided to write this bc there ain’t any requests and i want to write my feelings out and school has been legit so stressful despite being only the first week of the first semester omg pls give me requests because i’m more than happy to write them:)
this au is highly inspired by weightlifting fairy kim bok joo and Baby Don’t Like It because i think minhyung would totally fit Jeong Joon Hyung’s role and he totally fits his beginning lines in Baby Don’t Like It did you hear my oppar sing im so blessed
note: all my aus will be written in an 01 liner’s perspective, you can fit yourself into the scenario too:)
i dedicate all my written posts to @markleetrashh bc cheryl claims to be my number one fan HAHAH
sidenote i rlly don’t like mark’s uncooked instant noodle hair but boi looks good pls don’t hate me
ok so
ya’ll met when you guys were training at sm together
and probably bc you are the only girl fluent in english
despite having johnny and jaehyun around
mark wanted to make more friends awh
tbh he was shy and stuff
and like “hi??”
and yes friendly y/n said hi too w a sweet smile on her face
and that’s how mark fell in love w u
so ya’ll were best friends and often did the monthly evaluations tgt
^which required two trainees of the opposite gender
while his bandmates were struggling finding female trainees
mark was so so so confident bc firstly ya’ll were close af
and mark felt totally comfortable with you
and nonetheless you guys aced the evaluation yay
day by day mark fell deeper for you
bc you were there for him when he found things so tough
and when sm revealed sm rookies to the public,
mark was part of it
but you werent
ngl you sorta cried bc you wanted to be in sm rookies with your friends
and you had to move to a different dorm
mark sensed it immediately and cheered you up
he let you mope with tons of chicken and ice cream
and studio ghibli movies bc he knew you loved totoro
you binge ate to the point you were about to throw up
and your face was still stained w tears
“m-mark, i think i should quit sm…”
“wHy?! y/n, you’re super talented, you’re the best singer i have ever heard and the best dancer amongst the trainees, you cannot give up now when you have trained so long!”
“they didn’t put me in sm rookies, they must think i’m not pretty enough…”
he then shook your head with his hands and made you face him,
“look, y/n , you might not be in sm rookies but that does not say that you are not pretty! you are actually really pretty… to the point i have a crush on you for a very long time.”
you then stopped crying and stared at mark
mark was shookt he actually let out his feelings
“y/n, it doesn’t matter to me if you aren’t in sm rookies, you can quit sm, but you have to be by my side or i can’t function. i cannot concentrate when you’re not around, you give me motivation, y/n. and i like you very much y/n. i cannot express how much i like you because-”
and you couldn’t take mark’s babbling and kissed him on the lips
ngl mark’s heart was beating so fast it nearly met yours
and he kissed back
ironically when totoro seperated w the kids in the bg
despite it being you guys’ first kiss it was good tbh
and after like idk 10 seconds his forehead met yours,
“y/n, will you be my girlfriend?”
you nodded profusely and mark carried you up and spun you around and around omg
“Y/N IS MY GIRLFRIEND!!!!!!!!”
ok so if you thought mark was a big greaseball b4 ya’ll dated
he’s an even bigger goofball after you guys got together
tbh it was really risky for you guys to date since sm put a dating ban on the sm rookies
but absolutely full capable mark gave no shits and assured you that you guys were okay
“y/n are you a banana? bc i find you apeeling”
“pls oppa”
“are you a volcano? bc i lava you”
“LEE MINHYUNG!”
“did you come from heaven? bc you’re like an angel that fell from the sky”
“oh yeah? bc i will turn into a demon if you continue”
and you just turned on your heels and ignored mark
“omg y/n i’m so sorry are you ok?!”
after that mark never used pick up lines on you again
bc he couldn’t get your attention for the whole day
but he got it back when he just carried you literally on his back
and he nearly fell when you were struggling to get off him
people even thought mark was drunk tbh
and when you guys were going to school
he woke up early just to walk you to school
he always waited outside your apartment
and when he saw you he would stretch out his arms for a hug
and you hugged back awh
ngl mark smells rlly nice like idk a mark smell
he smells like himself
and you always tell him you’re cold so you can borrow his sweater
“oppa, i feel cold”
“it’s summer, y/n! are you sick?”
“no mark itsbcyousmellrllyniceilikeyoursmell”
“what?”
“i love you”
that was the first time you said those 3 magical words
and mark was shookt
but he composed himself and pecked your lips,
“i love you too, y/n”
mark will be blushing for the whole day ngl
taeyong thought he was sick
this boi is a sucker for skinship tbh
he doesn’t show it in public
like in public he would just give you hugs and hand holding and pecks
but when ya’ll are alone he would be SO CLINGY
“y/n!!!!!!”
“what”
“can i have a hug”
ofc you hug him bc minhyung’s cuddles are the best
and minhyung looks like the type of bf to call you babe
or baby
BC HAVE YOU HEARD HIM SAY ‘BABY’ IN THE INTRO OF BABY DON’T LIKE IT
I WANT HIS VOICE ON REPEAT
ahem
going back to cuddles
you guys would be on the couch
w your hands around mark’s torso
and mark’s hands around your shoulder
legs under the blanket
who cares if it’s summer
just blast the freaking air conditioner
and your head nuzzled into mark’s chest
his chest is the best pillow ever
any girl would die to be in your position tbh
ever since mark started debuting his chest became more firm
and his torso too
and for fun you lift up his shirt
ok i shall stop now i dont want to sexualise mark
and mark’s like
“YA WHAT YOU DOING BABE YOU’RE NOT SUPPOSED TO SEE THAT”
and you argue back
“oppa you gotta know you’re still a minor too”
you got him there like
“the director wanted me to exercise”
your dates are mostly spent at home or his dorms
but you 2 seldom go to nct’s dorms
bc you can’t do skinship bc the members will tease mark 4ever
you guys stay at home mainly bc mark needs rest
bc sm tire him out by debuting 4 times in the span of 1 year
mark didn’t mind but he wanted to go out once in a while
so you guys did
to lotte world
o god
the first thing you guys do is to buy couple headbands awh
and mark dresses casually
to avoid sasaeng fans
well mark wouldn’t be recognised as sm mostly gave him outrageous outfits
don’t remind me of that trashbag airport fashion pls
and after that you guys go to those rides that require little waiting time
bc you’re impatient
after the rides ya’ll went ice skating
being the kultz he is
he probably fell over a few times
and brought you down too
but its ok mark took advantage of the situation to peck you on the lips
sneaky
and his smile would be so goofy and cute
and you would smile too
and after lotte world ya’ll went to to the arcade
where you guys played the dancing step thing
and mark wins hands down bc boi his legs are so much longer than yours
but he lets you win once in a while awh
and that claw machine
when you said you wanted that Ryan plush
mark will get that for u ok
being in canada has an advantage for mark since it probably has tons of claw machines
and he got you that toy in his first try
when mark sees you smiling he would smile too
however
you two are not the type to let out your true feelings
bc you both are too afraid to burden each other
mostly its mark ranting to you about how haechan keeps disturbing him from 1pm to 2pm
rarely about how tired he is
bc he claims to be energised when he sees you awh
because he doesn’t want y/n to be sad
but there was one time you were super stressed about your exams
and mark could feel it
but you hid it with a smile like “its alright its just a lil stressful! not as stressful as oppa’s trainings tho!”
“babe i know you are stressed, it not fair if i’m the only one ranting to you. please let me know how you feel, so i can love you more.”
ngl that made you cry and mark panicked
“omg babe did i say something wrong?! omg im so sorry-”
“i love you too oppa! it just that school’s having such a high expectation for me and my parents want to see me do well-”
“shh shh”
then mark will pull you into a big hug and rub your back soothingly
“no matter what you do babe, i will always support you.”
supportive bf!mark will always be at your dance recitals/competitions
with your parents
he lowkey introduced himself as your boyfriend
your parents were shookt bc mark
this golden boi is dating my y/n?!?!?!?
but anyway
you often do rlly well bc you know mark is there and you can’t disappoint him
but even if you do badly mark would be there for you first
after the performance mark will show up outside your dressing room with a bouquet of flowers
all your friends would swoon
and your parents lowkey crying bc they know y/n is being loved when theyre not around
and you playfully slapping his chest
and hiding your blushing face
and at mark’s debut/comeback showcase
you’re there with his parents as well
and his parents treat you like their child bc theyre so sweet like mark
and mark would always throw a wink or heart in your direction
heart b-b-beat
and you would always go backstage between the breaks to give him a big hug and a word of support
“oppa!you did so well there omg”
“its because babe was watching me:)”
during your home econs lessons you would let mark taste your dishes
and he would praise it to the stars
bc its way better than taeyong’s cooking in his opinion
ngl for your anniversaries mark would always spoil you with gifts
if you want that daniel wellington
he will get that for you at your anniversary
and in return you buy for him those nike shoes that he wanted
even tho chinese superstition says watches and shoes are banned for being given as anniversary gifts as youre either sending off the dead or making your other half walking away from you lol
matching lockscreens and homescreens
ngl when you bring mark back to your home country for new years/seollal
you show him off to your relatives
and theyre like so shookt
“omg y/n!you grow up so quickly!!!and you have a boyfriend too!a good looking one!!”
and the adults groan bc they need to give one more red packet
and your same aged relatives are all over mark
and ngl you were really jealous because they were all so flirtish like
and after they left he comes over to tackle you with a hug
“babbeeee”
“why don’t you continue laughing w y/r/n?”
he then realises you’re jealous
“omg babe is jealous~”
cue blushing y/n
he then laughs it off and kisses you
and on the second day
you are with your cousins
and there was this cute and smart and rich guy who you liked before going to korea as a trainee
but he was dense af
and only now he realises his feelings
“omg y/n i was so stupid to not reciprocate your feelings,,will you go out with me?”
“uhmm i have a boyfriend now, im sorry i can’t go back 2 you”
HAHAHAH SEE THAT PUN
and minhyung turns up like hey babe who dis
and you told mark how much of an asshole he was
istg you had to physically stop mark from punching him
and that guy was so shookt you actually had a boyfriend 10x more handsome than his crusty ass
ok after that you played with your younger cousins
and your 4 year old cousin runs up to you enthusiastically
tackling you w hugs and kisses
and when mark sees that he literally melts
like how y/n is so good with kids
but at the same time he’s a little jealous
so he plays with the girl infant
ngl she likes him too
and your 4 y/o cousin was like
“is that your boyfriend?”
“uh huh”
“jiejie(noona) and gege(hyung) look rlly cute, he makes jiejie look v pretty”
save me
mark instantly hears that and runs over by your side
and tackles you with kisses smh
and that child is giggling until he nearly fainted
tl;dr; you and mark are goals and minhyung is 200% bf material as well
pls love him
thank you for reading
i might do a part 2
good night/day my friends
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1: Talk about the first time you watched your favorite movie. i don’t have one particular favourite movie per se. but star wars: i binge watched them at my friend’s house just before the ast jedi came out. i knew nothing about star wars and watched everything within 2/3 days. then, about a week later i watched the force awakens. and that was purely because we decided to watch the last jedi (which had just come out in cinemas) the next day. honestly, i didn’t care for star wars much skdjfhdjk but the force awakens really got me into it. and the last jedi fully sold me. then i went back and rewatched and i loooove the empire strikes back. now they’re my favourite movies. marvel: again, i hadn’t seen any marvel. but i had pretty much every friend i had yelling at me to catch up before end game came out. i loosely planned on watching them, but didn’t really get around to it until i got baked at a friends house and we had nothing to do. so we watched age of ultron and iron man and some others (i was too stoned to remember). i was sold i loved every second. and the fact that i was very high and rdj was very cute didn’t hurt. i went home the next day and watched ragnarok which happened to be probably the best movie i’d ever seen at that point. the next day, we got stoned again and watched infinity war. it was so fucked but amazing. i booked tickets for me and my dad to watch end game this saturday.
2: Talk about your first kiss. oh god. i was 15 and there was this guy who i thought was cool. he was a friend of my very gay crush at the time. me and the crush had a falling out later on. and a lot of other fucked up shit happened around that time period. i moved to his (the friend's) neighbourhood as it happened. we got talking because we had the same taste in music. and my best friend at the time put in a good word for me. i didn’t think of him as much more than a friend tbh, but my life was going to shit and i wanted to get out of the house ad have fun. so we organised to meet up at our town’s centre shopping place. i told my parents i was going with [insert random female names here] to hang out since we moved into a new place. they bought it and offered to drive me. i honestly thought we were just going to chill out and eat food. i was also nervous that this was a set up from his friend who was my crush, since the crush hated me and probably would have plotted to do something fucked. however, it turned out not to be a set up. we ended up walking around the suburb. this was much to my disapproval, because i was not very fit and had a strong dislike for exercise. he could tell i was tired and we decided to stop and sit down on this brick wall thing at the corner of a street. there was some terrible flirting on my part, and the next thing i know i was kissing this guy. i was pretty excited because every 15 year old girl wants their first kiss. and especially edgy ones who needed a distraction. i came home with no lipstick and chapped lips. lucky my parents were too busy to notice.
3: Talk about the person you've had the most intense romantic feelings for. most intense? i could list best friends, but in terms of intensity i think it would be this guy that i moved out with for the first time. i know this sounds terrible, but he was my best friend’s boyfriend at the time. i was pretty sure i was a lesbian at the time and i’m also not fucked up. so i wasn’t expecting this at all. because of the whole gay thing, and me being a flirty shit with anyone, i ended up very shamelessly flirting with him. he was sooo pretty, and im not just saying this. objectively, he is still probably one of the best looking people i’ve ever seen. and i own mirrors. anywayyyy, i took my sister to this lana del rey concert one day. not a lana fan personally, but borns was opening and i like him. turns out i like borns a lot. a hell of a lot. next day, i found myself talking to my best friend and her boyfriend and being like “hey i think i might be bi”. their reaction can be quoted as “oh cool okay.” the night after the concert, we got drunk. not a great idea, because i love to flirt when sober. so when i’m drunk and have literally 0 shame it’s a lot of fun but also an entire disaster. my friend bought her friend over and they were talking, which left me and the bf. the boys started teaching me self defence and were doing the whole smooth thing where they stand pressed up behind you and move your arms for you. they put me into headlocks and taught me how to get out and stuff. i was so drunk the ground kept spinning. a lot of terrible outrageous flirting ensued, like choking, touching adams apples, arm tickles, hugs that lasted 10 minutes while he had a knife in his pocket for whatever reason? more hugs like that but now featuring grinding. we slept in the same bed (just slept. nothing else. don’t get too excited). cuddling while in the same bed. laying on his chest and falling asleep. him playing with my hair. one time he played with my tiddies. this was over the course of like 9 months. whenever we werent 2 seconds away from like ..... jumping each other, we were just flirting in the most unsubtle way. obviously nothing happened, because he had a gf and everything. and as much as i didnt want to, i started to get some reeeeeal feelings. turns out the guy was a dick who only flirted with me whenever his gf wasnt paying attention to me. i later cut the whole thing off, and he started to act like a real dick to me. but yeaaahh. that was some intense shit.
4: Talk about the thing you regret most so far. probably not getting a license for any vehicle. that’s held me back so much the last 5 years. i wouldn’t have had to go through half the shit i did, if i could just drive
5: Talk about the best birthday you've had. my 15th birthday! i had raspberry chocolate bullets, watched movies in class because it was end of term, my friends bought me presents to school. the guy i had a crush on came to where i was sitting and sung a song to me in front of everyone. i think my friend bought me a club penguin membership? i ate pide and played league with crush and crush’s crush.
6: Talk about the worst birthday you've had. my 18th. i don’t want to talk too much about it because im very drunk atm but basically, i was suuuper depressed already that year. my mum was doing cocaine every spare second she could, and screwing men for it so she could get it for free (of course, none of us knew this at the time). whenever she wasn’t doing coke she was screaming at everyone for like, not taking pictures of her enough, or for eating dinner without asking her, etc. she and my dad were constantly either yelling at each other, or were 2 seconds away from yelling at each other. we went to a clothes shopping outlet. which i very outwardly expressed my hatred for, btw. my mum got mad because my dad told her not to look at clothes, because it was my 18th. my mum didn’t talk for the rest of the time we were in the shopping centre. i could feel the tension rising because they were in the 2 seconds away from having a fight period. i came home and watched sailor moon in my room alone. later my parents brought a cake and lit the candles. dad said to me “my god i am so sorry. this has been the most amazing birthday, hasnt it? you should thank your mother. she’s just the best. i’m so sorry! i never wanted this for you”. and, you know, my coke fuelled mother just screamed her lungs off and gave it right back to him. and my aries dad just yelled right back. and the candles were lit in the dark room and wax was dripping onto my chocolate birthday cake. and i hated chocolate flavoured cake. and i just wanted to run away all day because i knew this was going to happen. and they couldn’t even hold it together for me? or for my 18th? so i just sat there and cried as they screamed at eachother. i blew out the candles and ran into my bedroom and watched vines in my room. the end! :D
7: Talk about your biggest insecurity. honestly, i don’t have a lot of insecurities. i have a lot of fears, but not insecurities. i guess i’m insecure about my body in certain places. i have a scar from an operation i had when i was 9 and it makes my stomach look chubby, but only on one side? it’s out of proportion and weird. and i have violin hips.
8: Talk about the thing you are most proud of. honestly, it’s so simple, but i’m really proud of still being alive. i thought for sure i’d be dead by now
9: Talk about little things on your body that you like the most. i love my back! it sounds weird, but i have a rly nice waist and my back is sooo soft and smooth and it goes in at the waist and its so nice to touch and look at. and i have really nice and toned legs. and my arms are getting toned now too because my work makes me carry a lot of heavy stuff. and my baby sister is getting bigger and i’m usually the one to hold her. and i have nice hands too. but my favourite thing is my face and hair.
10: Talk about the biggest fight you've ever had. oh god. not going into much detail about this at all because i spend like 3 or 4 years crying about this. it featured: 2 best friends of mine who i had been friends with for 10 years; my crush at the time; random people off the internet i’d never met before. like i said before, i was a 15 year old with a lot going on. maybe that didn’t make it okay for me to be as annoying as i was, but it’s done now. they all got into a skype group chat together without me. and call it paranoia, but i call it intuition. i knew they were all shit talking me. i could tell there was something up for a while now. they all started changing their online profiles to something that very clearly mocked me, they started making posts about me, and posts that were clearly parodies of my posts. and i sort of went along with it because i dont like to stir up much trouble. but the posts just got worse and worse to where it was like ‘you were so weird and creepy’ and calling me names and stuff. honestly, i can’t even remember anymore because i spend a while blocking it out. but it was pretty mean. but it hurt more because there were all the people i was closest to, all saying fucked up shit about me. and then random people who lived in my city who i didnt know. after the fight ended, we never spoke again. but i spend the next 2 years afraid that i would bump into somebody from online in person and they would recognise me, and the whole thing would happen again
11: Talk about the best dream you've ever had. tbh i dont remember a lot of my dreams. i usually have nightmares anyway? i think i had a dream i could fly and had like magic powers and stuff. i was 8 or something and it was fun.
12: Talk about the worst dream you've ever had. after i moved out of my parents house, i had a lot of nightmares about my mum. again, i don’t remember specifics because i tried to block out the memory, but i remember feeling terrified, and then waking up relieved to remember i was out of there. after that, i started smoking weed which meant no dreaming which was good
13: Talk about the first time you had sex/how you imagine your first time. i haven’t had like..... sex sex yet. i’ve been almost raped a few times? skfsdkjfl that sounds so cringey. but yeah! i dont know though, i imagine i’ll probably be super drunk for my first time. or maybe high. they make me more confident than usual. and for some reason i dont really like the idea of sex when im sober. i don’t think i’d be willing to be vulnerable with someone unless it was in a circumstance like that, maybe. and i’d be sure i wouldn’t have to see them again later on unless i wanted to. that way if i embarrassed myself, it wouldn’t matter. it would just be a terrible memory no one else would ever have to know about.
14: Talk about a vacation. i want one of these answers to not be about a fucked up memory of mine but i ...... truly can’t recall something? i guess there was a christmas i had when i was a kid (maybe around 8 or 10) and i’ll leave out the fucked up bits. but i stayed with my mother’s family and my grandmother owned a holiday apartment thing which had a pool and my uncles had horses and i got to see everyone and my uncles were super funny and let me play video games with them.
15: Talk about the time you were most content in life. there was this period for about ..... 3 months in my last year of high school just before i graduated. all my assignments were over, and my major works were all finished. i was just putting the finishing touches on them. and all i had to do was study for exams. i got into the swing of school. and my friend got her license so she used to drive us places after school and we would hang out and do dumb shit together. i didn’t care what anyone thought of me because i knew i wouldn’t have to see them again in 6 months unless i wanted to. the next time was this few months after i’d just moved out of my parent’s house. probably 4 or 5 months. i had been dreaming of having my own place for like, my entire childhood. and i finally did! and it was with my best friend and this guy i really liked. and all i did was go to uni for a few hours a day. and then that was it! my time was all my own to do whatever i wanted with. i didn’t have a lot of money but i was so so so happy. i used to take myself to the movies. i was in walking distance of a train station and uni. so i could go wherever i wanted, whenever i wanted. i just felt so free
16: Talk about the best party you've ever been to. the first part of my house-warming party was probably the best. i got really drunk, and someone’s mum brought weed so i was reeeeeally drunk and then reeeeeally high. i was dressed in the cutest outfit and a few people were flirting with me. actually, i think i made out with like 3 different people that night. and my friend bought me flowers! which i loved because no one had ever bought me flowers before. and we went to the park and i was so high and drunk and the little swing ride i was on felt like a rollercoaster.
17: Talk about someone you want to be friends with. hmmmmm to be honest, i’m trying not to make friends at the moment. i have a lot of other stuff i need to focus on. and having friends only leads to disappointment and heartbreak. i have a few friends i’ve accidentally made, but i’m trying to keep my distance from them so that we’re just ‘friends’ and not ‘good friends’ or anything like that. but secretly, i do love them a lot.
18: Talk about something that happened in elementary school. me and my best friend at the time were doing a school play about mary the saint (i went to catholic school). there were 3 of us: me, my best friend, and some guy who didnt have friends so we let him in our group. anyway, i wanted to play mary, but for whatever reason, this dude reeeeeeally fucking wanted to be mary. he started like yelling and stomping and being like “NO! i want to be mary!” and then just as he stomped his foot, a branch from a tree fell right on his head. and, without missing a beat, my friend goes “well, that branch hit you on the head so now you can’t be mary” and i laughed my ass off and he cried 19: Talk about something that happened in middle school. omg these are all going to be funny stories because why not. so this one time in like 6th grade, we had to use calculators to do some complex maths work. and there was this one calculator that kept fucking up and giving the wrong answers. i knew enough basic maths at that point to know that the calculator was faulty. anyway so me and my friends gave it to this other kid just to punk him a little right. turns out he didn’t realise it was a broken calculator and he finished his work and handed it in to the teacher, and proceeded to get in trouble sjlfsorerjlksjr
20: Talk about something that happened in high school. omg so in high school i did this multimedia class. so we would film events like chapels (i went to a christian high school) and assembly, etc. and what we filmed would go on the big screens for everyone to see. kinda like a concert. and anyway, one time this kid got in trouble in front of everyone, and my classmate did this dramatic zoom on our multimedia teacher as he stormed out of the auditorium, dramatically walking out to get the kid in trouble
21: Talk about a time you had to turn someone down. oh so this one time after i finished school i started going through rough patch #2 and i just needed a friend to talk to. and this guy from school was sort of the only friend who kept checking up on me and inviting me out places. and i liked that. i didn’t always have enough energy to do stuff or talk, because, depression. but i appreciated the fact that he cared. never thought much about it. until one day, we hadn’t spoken for like a month and he tells me suddenly that he has feelings for me. and of course, that’s so sweet and i did love the guy. but i wasn’t in the headspace for a relationship at all. i really just needed a friend. and i felt so terrible
22: Talk about your worst fear. my worst fear ever? it used to be dying. but i think now it’s just having to go through what i went through again. my worst fear would be being a child again and being at the mercy of others and having to rely on them. my worst fear is trusting people and having them completely fuck you up. again and again. and not being able to do anything about it because you need them.
23: Talk about a time someone turned you down. hoo boy. i was 15 and made friends with someone on the internet who turned out to go to my school. developed a crush on him, but he was very gay. i ended up telling him for whatever reason. and that went just about the way you’d think
24: Talk about something someone told you that meant a lot.
i don’t know. most people don’t know what they’re talking about when they give me advice. and i’m not saying that to be arrogant, but just most people haven’t been through much and not to sound self-pitying but i’ve been through a lot in a short amount of time. these are just facts here. so i don’t really believe what people say. i used to have this friend who was and will probably always be the only person who could ever make me laugh. genuinely. it felt like soulmates, but i was like a kid. but we had exactly the same sense of humour, and she was so witty and quick and would always have the best comedic timing. i really admired her and still do. anyway, one time she called me effortlessly funny. and that meant a lot then and still does now.
25: Talk about an ex-best friend. i just did, but sure. i’ll keep talking about her because i’m already thinkig of her. i’m pretty sure she was a capricorn rising. she had this really deadpan humour and it was always hilarious. we were friends since we were 4 years old. and i dont think i appreciated it as much as i should have at the time, but we really did grow up together and in each others arms. she was very cool and closed off and serious. and i got to see her funny and silly side. but what was even cooler than that was that i got to know her emotionally. she had a twin, and looking back, i don’t think her twin even saw as much of that as i got to. we used to have talks about anything and everything. you know those people who you can stay up all night laughing with and talking to and it doesn’t even feel like it’s been 10 minutes and all of a sudden the sun is coming up? but it was so effortless and fun and. yeah. it was like that. i still haven’t met anyone like that since. we later had a falling out and i met her again after like a year but we both had our walls up and that’s sort of when i realised how much we really trusted each other. you don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone kinda thing.
26: Talk about things you do when you're sick. complain. bitch. complain some more. i usually buy nasal spray because having a blocked nose is SO ANNOYING. and otherwise, i don’t mind being sick too much. like obviously it’s not ideal but you do what you can. if i’m truly annoyed with being sick, i just sleep so i don’t have to be awake to deal with it
27: Talk about your favorite part of someone else's body. i love girls tummys and waists
28: Talk about your fetishes. idk i like some light bondage, light choking, a biiiiit very much maybe potentially kinda into rapeplay, and spanking is fun
29: Talk about what turns you on. most of what turns me on is like dom/sub power dynamics. im into scanarios that have a looooot of sexual build up and tension. it’s pretty much foreplay for me personally. especially if it’s like flirty banter or implications, and dirty talk can be fun if done right.
30: Talk about what turns you off. absolutely not into anal at all. complete turn off. not at all into the thing where people get off on girls acting like kids, or people who think fucking someone who is asleep is hot. idk i like most normal shit tbh. anything else is probably weird for a reason
31: Talk about what you think death is like. i think it’s probably the most painful experience you’ll ever have physically. and then everything goes black and that’s it
32: Talk about a place you remember from your childhood. i remember my childhood house’s backyard. it was massive and had like a step in the middle where the grass changed levels. there was a swingset with a slide. and for the majority of my childhood my parents were doing renovations, so there were lots of holes in the backyard that we used to dodge. we used to catch lizards and i used to collect bird feathers. and at the very back, right in front of the back fence, my parents planted little trees and chillis
33: Talk about what you do when you are sad. i immediately find the fastest way to be alone. i immediately listen to music. i drink or smoke or get high on something. or i try to make myself laugh if i’m at work and can’t do either of those things. if i can’t make myself laugh, i try to talk to a customer and pretend to be happy hoping that whatever they have to say will distract me from whatever i’m sad about.
34: Talk about the worst physical pain you've endured. eugh. every year i somehow get sent to the hospital because i can’t stop vomiting. i dont know how because its always for different reasons. but i always end up puking an excessive amount on an annual basis. the worst pain is when you can’t stop vomiting, so your stomach just cramps and cramps and cramps and you vomit but nothing happens and it just cramps again. it’s literally worse than period cramps. and mine are so bad.
35: Talk about things you wish you could stop doing. having anxiety. i overthink a lot which doesnt help either. the thing is that i studied psychology, and i still don’t know how to stop myself from being so anxious. like i know how much it affects my work and stuff but i just can’t stop feeling like i’m about to die at any given second.
36: Talk about your guilty pleasures. drinking, drugs, smoking, im not even guilty about those. idk. to quote niall hora- i mean pink, i’m not guilty about any of my pleasures
37: Talk about someone you thought you were in love with. an old best friend. different to aforementioned best friend. we were friends for 6 years. not as close as the other one, but close as i’ve been to someone since. we were both depressed and going through stuff and both flirted with each other just for shits and gigs. idk. i think we really only bonded because we were both depressed and suicidal and having someone else around who is going through the same stuff makes everything so much more bearable. once i stopped being depressed i stopped being as close and as in love. but at the time, it was really nice and beautiful, we truly could talk about anything together. i could have opened with “i love being dominated in bed” instead of “hello” and she would have just rolled with it. we used to dream about the future together and hold hands and hug. idk. we used to just hang out together and there was never any pressure to do anything or be anyone. it was just us being our dorky selves.
38: Talk about songs that remind you of certain people. goodbye stranger by supertramp reminds me of above mentioned friend, two of us by the beatles reminds me of first mentioned best friend, and i love her by the beatles reminds me of this friend group i had for 10 years. princess by shortstack reminds me of this friend i had for a few years who i almost had a thing with because i knew she liked me but neither of us ever said anything.
39: Talk about things you wish you'd known earlier. i wish i’d have known that it’s not a good or admirable trait to be so open with people so quickly. you shouldn’t immediately show people that you trust them or like them, and you definitely shouldn’t get so excited about things for them. it makes you look naive and they will definitely just use you. i wish i’d known to get my license earlier i wish i’d have known what weed was like earlier. it really would have helped me out a lot.
40: Talk about the end of something in your life. the end of high school was really hard. i know a lot of people hated high school. and i did. but once i got to my final 2 years, i had this confidence that comes with being older in school and it was really nice. i love the routine we had and the forced structure school made you have in your life. i enjoyed mucking around with teachers and that feeling of starting assignments before they’re due. being at school was nice because i mostly kept to myself and was generally well-liked. so i had this big support system that got me through a lot. and school ending meant that the support i had also ended. and then i had nothing and nobody and went through so much and had to be alone for it all. the end of school coincided with the worst period of my life #2, probably because i was at home to experience a lot more.
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FREE Shopping day at the Mall
guys, I have rewards to use!
Macys had clearance (last act) I got about $100 of items for reselling and got a $20 card to use
I went back and spent another $150 on things to keep, including new dresses and skirts, and 2 more “professional” looking blouses, plus a beaded dress to list for prom season. Got another $20 to use
VS sent me a $75 reward card for any purchase. My mom and I went to the outlet before christmas and spent about $600 all together. She got a ton of bras ($10) and underwear, gifts, and the leggings ($15). I got new underwear ($2.99!) plus a bunch of $2.99 tanks and $10 lingerie for eBay. we got most of the points from there lol. i’ve been watching and have been hesitant about using it since i want to get the most bang for the money. i think free tanks and the $20 is the best it could get. this way i could list it all, plus something from the $20 card and make easily $100 or more. i’d rather have $100 in the bank than $75 worth of full priced clothes, since i get my VS and PINK at the outlets now. I buy it cheap enough that i can wear it and sell it used and still make a profit. if they don't have the cute tanks tomorrow then i’ll save the card or have them order online for me (free ship to the store)
i also have a $5 starbucks gift card which was completely free courtesy of bing rewards.
Chikfila had a cow calendar that came with a card for a free item every month. I think its a soda and expires tomorrow, so Ill probably give it to my boyfriend.
Wawa (a gas station in the northeast us) also has free coffee every friday in march, of any size, for members.
so tomorrow is gonna be fire. I’ll try to pick up 2 more free people dresses in the macys clearance with the $40, so they’ll be mostly free. With the $75 at vs, i plan to buy 2 cropped leggings to get 2 free tanks. That puts my bill at $72, so i’m $3 short. Ill check the clearance for $4 panties or something around $10 to resell. Im hoping to get the difference to be no more than $10. hopefully it ends up having 2 leggings, 2 tanks, and a panty for free plus a $20 card.
I have an ulta reward of $3 (haha) from when i picked up gifts my mom asked me to go and get after thanksgiving. they have a sale right now where ulta brand glosses/ lotions are $3, so it’d basically be free other than tax. its great to throw in my sister’s easter basket or even in my moms gift.
Plus I’ll have coffee, the bf will get a soda, and we can get a snack at starbucks with the card. the whole shopping trip will be pretty much free. the vs stuff will get listed on posh and eBay, and we will see about the macy’s stuff (if i find free people or things i really like ill keep but if not it'll get listed). I am so excited
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