#billy quite literally has a scottish accent

[wholeshebangs]

cloak and dagger

( these are two scenes i wrote... 4-3 years ago? for a harringrove witcher au i was working on with @aggressiveviking during the beginning of covid. i didn’t want these to keep gathering dust in my docs so, i’m turning them into a drabble here.

the one where billy is a witcher and steve is the missing noble he needs to bring back home. )

First, he hears the steady beating of his own heart, then the crackling of a campfire.

When Billy opens his eyes, bright specks fly over his face. Embers floating above the flames, soaring like fireflies in the dark.

His pupils shrink at the sight and – immediately, it makes way for a wave of nausea. It causes his stomach to churn, and his eyeballs to throb. Leaves him feeling a bit sick and pallid. The glowing warmth beside him heating the blood beneath his skin and seeping from it thick beads of sweat.

It doesn’t take him long to realize he’s just woken up from deep slumber. His memories are blurry. He can only wonder when exactly his consciousness went adrift. His bones feel heavy and his limbs are numb. And for a moment, he thinks his body is slowly sinking into the dirt below him.

His eyes grow wide, he draws in a gasp, and suddenly a far more pleasing sight welcomes him.

“You shouldn’t move,” Steven’s face is there, the sound of his voice ever so soothing. He hovers over Billy, hair messy and ungathered. His features are gentle, handsome, save for the new cut on his nose. “M’not sure if your wounds have healed yet.”

“Wounds?” Billy all but croaks like a lake frog. He’s then suddenly more aware, and despite what he’s told, he props himself up on his elbows with a groan, desperate to get a look of their surroundings; just a bunch of fuckin’ trees and a small clearing. “What happened?”

Steven is there again to push him back, canteen in hand. He frowns. “Don’t you remember? Thought we were huntin’ for a foglet on the prowl. Turned out it’d been dead all along. A taller, much ugly bastard knocked you out cold. Didn’t value my life enough to flee.”

Billy stares at him, because Steven looks, well, not any worse than he feels. “What’d ye do?”

Steven shrugs and answers simply. “I killed it.”

“What?”

Billy figures he deserves the cold glare he receives in return. Steven purses his lips, a wrinkle growing in the space between his eyebrows. He’s never been one to enjoy being underestimated. “You had some sort of concoction on you. Threw it at ‘em and the fucker blew right up. Wasn’t pretty.” Steven isn’t very delicate in the way he pushes the canteen against Billy’s lips, but Billy drinks up anyway. His throat feels better already. “Decided to keep the head like you do, hang it up on my steed, and I must say, looks rather… morbid but the satisfaction is still rewarding.”

Right as Steven says this, Billy turns to their horses. They’re both standing together, chewing on the grass. His own carries a griffin’s head, and Steven’s -- “An ekimmara.”

“Hm.”

Steven doesn’t sound at all like he even knows what the creature actually is, a fact Billy almost finds impressive if not amusing. Its head hangs there, still fresh, oozing with blood and staining its white beard a nasty red. They are ugly. And Steven just… cut its head off like that.

What catches his attention the most is that he remains here, by Billy’s side. He’s been watching over him, tending to his wounds, eating the remains of their fuckin’ trail mix, Billy’s guessing.

He does look exhausted though. Hungry. Didn’t value my life enough to flee, Steven had said, acknowledging that he could have ran, but didn’t.

While Billy’s too conflicted to say anything, Steven unfolds the bandages he’d apparently wrapped around his torso. It is then that Billy notices the heavier parts of his armor had been removed. His skin has already scarred. “You’re lucky your kind don’t die easy,” Steven says.

But his kind do. His kind get the flu and die within a week. His kind get lost and never return. And he stayed long enough to blow a monster up. Long enough to boast about it.

Could’da ran and hid where Billy wouldn’t find him again.

Billy’s face drops. “Are ye hurt?”

Steven looks up at him, seemingly taken aback. He shakes his head and nibbles at his bottom lip. “Nearly shit my trousers and lost my bloody hearin’ for you but I’m good.”

Billy feels it, the itch of what could’ve been a laugh at the base of his throat. He likes Steven’s character.

But that slight resemblance of a grin soon falters. Steven’s fingertips brush over his abdomen, gingerly, tracing the scars that reach his navel. Billy figures he must be taking a last look. Surely, with no ulterior motive. It is Billy who draws in a breath and holds it in, not Steven.

There’s a pause that indicates hesitation. Billy’s eyelashes flutter, his skin burns up, and he waits. Stares at the hand that’s giving him a heated thrill. Stares until the red against pale skin leads his thoughts elsewhere.

“Yer bleedin’.”

When he looks up, he notices Steven’s cheeks have gone rosy. It catches him off guard for only a second. “It’s nothing,” Steven grumbles, pulls his hand away almost immediately and stands, hair askew. “I need a wash. There’s a river nearby.”

“Steven –”

“I’ll be back,” Steven gives him that authoritative look that always shuts Billy up, but it is somehow also reassuring. Enough that Billy deflates. “I shouldn't take too long, and you can look after yourself.”

“That’s not why I worry.”

“I know.”

Steven doesn’t give him a chance to answer. He turns on his heels and leaves, back to Billy, clothes so dark he blends in with the trees once the fire’s glow no longer reaches him. Billy focuses on his senses only so he can hear where Steven runs off to, catches the sound of a steady stream and of rippling water and realizes Steven wasn’t lying after all.

He feels foolish, embarrassed even. He doesn’t know whether to blame himself or Steven for having done it before.

One of the horses huff, and when Billy looks, Steven’s steed has a dark stare fixed on him.

“Don’t look at me like that.” It doesn’t look away either. “Stop.”

It troubles him when he wonders who trusts the other more. Most days he doesn’t know what to make of the things Steven does and says. Perhaps he ponders too much on it, too unused to being seen as something other than a mutant freak. He’s not quite sure why he continues to entertain the thought that Steven isn’t them, the people who spit on the ground Billy walks on and that throw their coins at his feet when he finishes the job.

He looks to where Steven took off, takes a deep breath and decides he too longs for a wash.

~

When the sky grows dark and the dim light of the sun fails to pierce the billow of fog just ahead, on the other side of the horizon, the moon rises. Tonight, it will be full, and it will mark another day where his future seems more uncertain. He doubts even an old seer would have anything good to say about his fortune. For the deadline was due a month ago and their path was still long. They’ve just gotten to the Crossroads. Novigrad was perhaps another full moon away as well.

It will also count as another day where Steven still hasn’t made it back home. Billy wonders if Steven would even want that. Or if he'd stay, in the end. Once, that kind of setting fit him like a glove. But now?

"–the poor old sod gots this look in his eyes. He's sweatin' down to his knickers, shakin' in his boots and everything. Over a ladle. Can you imagine? I've won many things over a round of cards. But a ladle? Oh. And not just any ladle," Now Billy wonders how Steven’s parents would react to a story like this. He can imagine a banquet, a feast across one of those big, long tables, with proper rich guests hearing a nobleman’s son boast about how he won a round of gwent to some old bastard in Oreton.

"A golden ladle. Made stews and whatnot taste different, he said. I myself learned to settle for roasted wild dogs, but I couldn't turn down a good challenge. I won the damn thing too, you know. Looked mighty fine held up in the sun. Didn't do shit with it though. Lost it one night I got much too drunk. I wonder what happened to it..."

Billy doesn’t know what to say, so he only offers, “My condolences,” and gets a somewhat amused look from Steven. “Can’t imagine what it must feel like to lose an item so valuable.”

If Steven notices the thick sarcasm in his voice, he doesn’t show it. “And I never got to have a bowl of stew stirred with a golden ladle. Shame.” As an afterthought, he adds, “I’ve eaten gold flakes off a tart once though.”

Billy frowns. “Did it taste any different?”

A breeze blows over Steven’s loose string of hair, before he answers, “Nah, not really.” He fiddles with the reins in his hands some. “Emptyin’ my bowels however--”

“Please shut up.”

Steven grins wide, snickers loudly, before they fall silent once again. They’re both tired, worn down to the bone. Steven no longer sits straight and proud over his steed like usual, but he hunches over him, running a soothing hand over the horse’s neck every now and again. The beast huffs louder now, flares its nostrils like a hunting hound.

"We should stay here the night." At this, Steven only hums, a throaty sound that makes Billy’s mouth water. Steven’s eyelids are heavy, his lips wet from licking, he thinks. The weather is cold, the air dry. His lips must be getting chapped. And perhaps Billy must be thinking about them for too long, because Steven turns to look at him like he’s gone mad. “You must be tired.”

Steven squints a bit, then goes, “What about you? Not gonna’ meditate again, are you? It’s so boring.”

“Ugh, stop complaining.” Billy has yet to understand why this bothers the other so much. “Yer not meant to watch. Nothing fascinating will happen if you stare long enough.”

Steven just shrugs, turns to face ahead, where the village has become clearer to the view. “Can’t sleep knowin’ you’re just sitting here. It’s awkward.”

“Uh-uh.”

The village isn’t boasting with people. The townsfolk must have gotten ready for bed. The cattle chew slowly on the grass, the poultry peck on the dirt. The candles glow from the other side of the windows, yet the village remains quiet. There’s an old man with a dog sitting on a porch, watching. But the old man does not squint, and the old dog does not bark. They seem friendly, but looks can be deceiving, he’s learned.

The mud here is wetter than usual. The wind whistles. The sky is gray as the starry night takes over. It should rain soon enough. The misty weather would do nothing to him. Steven though, he gets sick like any other person.

“We keep to ourselves,” Billy starts, beginning to grow wary now that he’s certain his luck must be turning foul. He should have been back with Steven weeks ago. “No blabbering or nothin’ with anyone. No playing cards with strangers–”

But not to anyone’s surprise, or to his own really, Steven isn’t listening. He isn’t even next to Billy. He stopped his horse to read the frayed notice board.

They shouldn’t be taking contracts anymore. Steve knows this. Billy’s been in a hurry since he first left Novigrad.

However, the closer he inches to Steven, the more cautious he grows. Because he’s staring at something, expression somber. He looks upset, almost. And when Billy takes a look himself –

It’s one of those missing posters he’d seen some time ago before he found Steven, where he’s younger and doesn’t look much like he does now. The sketch is rougher than the one Billy keeps, with thinner lines and little details. It’s still Steven though, even if the paper is weathered and yellow. His eyes look sadder in this one. Shinier even. It’s almost like the artist wanted people to feel pity.

Billy wouldn’t have thought those posters would make it this far into the area. He wonders if the villagers here even know who this boy is, or was.

“They looked for me,” Steven all but whispers. Billy guesses he must be referring to his parents. It’s a bit of an awkward predicament. He doesn’t like the solemn tone in Steven’s voice.

“Of course they did,” As far as comforting words go, he doesn’t seem to do so well. Steven’s face grows a bit more sour. “Yer their son after all. They sent me looking for you for a reason.”

“Would’da expected it from mother,” Steven comments, shoulders falling. “But father…”

Billy doesn’t have many great things to say about Steven’s father. Man’s a bit of a flaccid prick. But mothers always lose their wits when their children go missing. “You disappeared without a trace. ‘Twas to be expected.”

Steven doesn’t answer. He stares at the poster, like the sight of himself as a young lad strikes him wrong.

“Come,” Billy calls, kicking his own horse so that it moves a few steps ahead. “It’s getting dark.”

“Wait.”

Boy’s got eyes almost as good as his own. The notice board is littered with all kinds of papers and contracts, like the people couldn’t be damned to keep them in order anymore. There’s one nailed over another yellowy poster, too. Steven reaches out, rips it away, and pauses.

“Oh,” His big eyes grow wider. Billy feels his face and ears grow hot. “Oh! Uilleim – they got you all sorts of wrong. Take a look at this!”

Billy doesn’t want to, because he knows exactly what the fuck it is. He saw it from the peripheral of his eyes. He’s avoiding having to look at it, but Steven’s shoving it in his face as their horses bump together, suddenly lacking the concept of personal space.

Steven all but guffaws. It’s loud, so loud. That old man he spotted with the dog turns to look at them. “Steven –”

“By the Gods, man, what did they do to you?” It’s very fitting for him to point everyone to the wanted man. Because, it’s a Wanted poster, offering a considerable prize for Billy’s head. The scars look worse than how they actually are, deeper and rougher. His eyes? He looks like a fucking lizard in this. He doesn’t remember his eyebrows ever looking that neglected. And he knows he looks healthier than that. “Ya look like you missed a month’s worth of rations. A skinny fellow, like those bandits on the road! Remember that thin, shit-eating twat from Condyle?”

“Could you–” Billy has little luck swatting the poster away from Steven’s hands. When Billy stiffens and glares, Steven holds the poster up again to compare. He wheezes.

“They did you no justice. You’re far more handsome than this,” Flattering, except the jest doesn’t seem so funny when it means Steven’s father is quite literally out for his blood. Steven’s eyes water like he’s seeing something so hilarious his bladder may burst. “You look like a basilisk.”

“If you don’t hand over that poster right now I will rip yer guts out,” He has no such luck. Steven’s never been afraid of him. Any other day he would’ve found that endearing. Today though? “Steven.”

“Can I keep it?”

“What–” Billy scowls. “No.”

“If I leave it here the others might spot ya,” At this, Steven pauses. “I don’t think they’ll be able to tell it’s you actually. Not with their gawkers.”

Billy can’t tell if he feels embarrassed, angry, or humiliated. He’s tired however. He doesn’t want to spend all night trying to take that horrendous piece of work off Steven’s greedy hands. “If you show it to anyone–”

“What?” Steven gives him a daring look, as if this were even the time. “You’ll fight me?”

Billy glowers at him. “I’ll show them this.”

He feels and thinks he sounds ridiculous. ‘Cause he actually likes the sketch of Steven he kept. The one where he wears his noble clothes, where his hair is style, where his eyes are kind and almost soothing. But to Steven this is embarrassing, shameful, and he turns bright red at the sight of it. His little bully act? It falters. He looks horrified even. “Mother made me sit down for hours so the painter could finish that,” He’s sharing this memory like it’s the most awful experience he’s ever gone through. “My ass hurt after.”

“Yeah, well, it’s going to hurt more if you don’t shut it.” It’s not the choice of words he meant to choose. Steven stammers to say something; Billy tries not to think of the hotness in his own face. He needs to be able to meditate later. “Let’s go.”

Steven follows, though with little enthusiasm. “You’re a bore,” Billy rolls his eyes. “I don’t find your quick wit amusing anymore.”

“Hey,” Billy turns back to the inn. “Feelin’s mutual.”

[pigballoon]

Outlaw King

(David Mackenzie, 2018)

As a big fan of almost everything that David Mackenzie has done to date, a filmmaker who even when his films are not quite outright winners is usually interesting enough as a filmmaker, or playing with characters from far enough out of left field to be supremely watchable I have to say without a shadow of a doubt this is by some margin the weakest film of his that I have ever seen.

It’s a damn shame too, because after his breakout American movie, the Oscar nominated Hell and High Water was not only lauded by critics, but performed impressively at the box office you would think the world would be his oyster. Indeed, he’s made the most of that success, Outlaw King is by far the biggest production of his life, and it all looks wonderful, there’s never any sense of cheapness around the movie, the costumes don’t look especially like costumes, the world looks lived in, the visuals are impressive, and he’s assembled a cast of enough note that they can at least lend this film the appearance of prestige and class, but when it comes down to it this Scottish directors big Hollywood Scottish movie is... More Hollywood fairytale than Braveheart was.

It sells itself as something more, no kilts, no bagpipes, it’s a much more sombre affair in general, yet when it comes down to it the film is as loose with the truth, and as romanticized in its portrait of its leading man and lady as Mad Mel’s much maligned Best Picture winner.

Not that a film in this day and age about a history 700 years in the past should ever be expected to be remotely accurate, anyone that has seen enough movies will know better than that by now, but if you’re selling yourself as a more accurate take on a history that has already been popularly told then maybe try harder. The representation of both Robert the Bruce and his wife Elizabeth is so comically 21st century in the midst of all this 14th century brutality that it renders the movie at its very core quite impossible to take seriously. Beyond that, and more importantly than that, the film in general is a gross simplification of complicated people at a complicated time in history, which is a damn shame because Mackenzie has proven himself time and time again a man who delves into the complex natures of people, into their dark hearts, and so for him to be basically doing Robin Hood in Scotland with dodgy accents to boot is just such a wasted opportunity.

Still, all that moaning aside it’s a very watchable movie. As already noted, the production values are great, as the pretty, laughably romanticized leads Chris Pine and the wonderful Florence Pugh are both fine (their sex scene is one of note, one of the few interesting things in the entire film), James Cosmo lends a little class and authenticity, Billy Howle continues to fill the niche of obnoxious, pathetic asshole brilliantly to the point you can’t tell if he’s awful or wonderful, Aaron Taylor-Johnson creeps along quietly, normally, until his time comes to shine, and then he flies off the fucking handle with aplomb in another of the movies genuine highlights. The final of said highlights to take note of is the mighty Stephen Dillane, bringing far more class to this movie than it deserves, doing a total 180 from Patrick McGoohan’s legendary take on the same monarch, fleshing him out through performance in a way that nobody else here manages to do, and being far too underused. 

If you’re into the whole historical drama thing then it’s an easy to watch one too, and in spite of its sombre nature it never drags, it’s a really classy piece of work on Mackenzie’s part, but the fact that it has 5 credited writers, and pretty much every other movie he’s ever made have had 1 or 2 at most kind of shows. The human element is totally lost, but at least it has guts, literal ones, not narrative or cinematic ones.

[justanothercinemaniac]

Epic Movie (Re)Watch #139 - Brave

Spoilers below

Have I seen it before: Yes

Did I like it then: Yes.

Do I remember it: Yes.

Did I see it in theaters: Yes.

Was it a movie I saw since August 22nd, 2009: Yes, #166.

Format: Blu-ray

1) Like a lot of post Toy Story 3 Pixar movies, Brave gets some crap from people for not being as brilliant as movies like Up. But I really like it!

2) The entire prologue works very well for the film. We get a clear sense of the relationship between Merida and her parents, specifically her mother. It is that relationship with her mother which allows for juxtaposition of their more flawed relationship in the rest of the film. We also get a nice introduction to Mordu and the wisps.

3) Kelly MacDonald as Merida.

There are so few voice over actors who so perfectly represents their characters as perfectly as Macdonald does Merida. I mean it’s mind blowing! The actress is able to capture the princess’s youthful vigor, stubbornness, struggles with her mother, love for her family, and sense of adventure all...perfectly! There is no Macdonald there is only Merida. Merida through and through. Reese Witherspoon was originally cast in the part but dropped out because of her accent problems I think (not 100% sure) and honestly - while I love Reese Witherspoon - I’m so glad she did. I can’t imagine ANYONE else playing Merida quite as spectacularly as Macdonald does.

4) Emma Thompson as Queen Elinor.

Thompson is a fine voice over actress (not fine as in mediocre but fine as in fine wine). She has had experience before in Treasure Planet and would do voice over work again in this year’s Beauty and the Beast, and she imbues Elinor with the same great sense of character as she does her other parts. You are able to understand that Elinor is trying to come from a place of love and caring for Merida, even if you don’t agree with her actions (which I don’t). It is easy to see where Merida gets her ferocity from as Thompson plays Elinor with the same sense of strength and even gets moments to show off some nice humor. I like Elinor mostly because of the journey she goes on through the film, and i think Thompson does a nice job in the part.

5) “Touch the Sky” by Julie Fowlis is a nice first song to feature in the film. It represents not only the film’s Scottish setting but also Merida’s sense of adventure quite well.

6) Billy Connolly as Fergus.

Connolly is a master comedian and honestly I’m laughing just looking at this GIF of Fergus I’m using. He’s so funny and his voice has such life to it that its a wonderful part to isolate for this movie. But Connolly also has range. Towards the end of the film when he thinks his wife is dead Connolly is able to show some great grief and focus through his portrayal as the Scot. You understand why this man is king in those moments, but you still laugh for most of the film.

7) Was Pixar ever subtle with their references, or was I just too stupid to get them as a kid?

^^^^Lord Macintosh (Steve Jobs helped get Pixar started)^^^^

8)

Elinor [after telling Merida about the forced arranged marriage]: “I don’t know why you’re reacting this way!”

(GIF source unknown [if this is your GIF please let me know].)

9) We get a nice peek into how Fergus & Elinor work as a married couple in small moments throughout the film.

Fergus: “You’re muttering.”

Elinor: “I don’t mutter!”

Fergus: “Ay, you do!”

The way Fergus shows pride in his queen being fierce, the way she is able to quell his rivalry with the other clan heads, his love for her seen after she’s presumed dead, all paint a nice image of a marriage.

10) I may be biased because I first saw this film when I was 16 years old, but I always felt that Merida was listening to her mother’s reasons but they just don’t matter as much as her mother thinks they do. To the contrary, I feel like Elinor really does not listen to or consider what Merida is saying.

11) Obligatory John Ratzenberger cameo in a Pixar film!

Since this is my first recap of a Pixar film, I’ll explain for those who may not know: John Ratzenberger has had a role in literally ever Pixar feature length film ever made. Ham in Toy Story, PT Flea in A Bug’s Life, Mack in Cars, John in WALL-E, the list is all encompassing. They even called notice to this fact in Cars when all the characters are at the drive in movie during the credits.

It’s nice that Pixar has continued their tradition of including the voice actor in all their films, but I’m a bit disappointed his roles seem to becoming progressively smaller. Still, better some John Ratzenberger than no John Ratzenberger.

12) The trio of Macintosh, Macguffin and Dingwall provides a fun extra layer of comedy to the film. Their feuding and bickering are funny in the classic sense. In a lot of ways they are the animated Scottish equivalent to the Three Stooges.

Craig Ferguson as Macintosh, Kevin McKidd as Macguffin, and Robbie Coltrane as Dingwall all do an excellent job with making their characters unique and playing off of the other. They’re really just a lot of fun.

13) This film has some A-grade humor.

Lord Dingwall: “I present, my ONLY son!”

14) I would say the film’s biggest weakness would be is that it can lack focus at times. Especially earl on, some scenes feel like they go on just a little bit too long meaning the film might feel like it doesn’t get very far in it’s 90 minute run time. It’s not fatal and as I said above I still truly enjoy this film, but there’s also a behind the scenes for that I’ll get to later on.

15) With the trio of Merida, Fergus, and Elinor, the film really does do a nice job of fleshing out their relationships in small but important ways. Merida and Elinor’s relationship IS the focus on the film, and I’ve commented on Fergus and Elinor before, but Merida and Fergus are shown to have a nice camaraderie between them. A respect and admiration for each other, as well as a shared sense of humor. This was scene first at the dinner table before Merida was told of the arranged marriage and is seen again (at its best) when Merida and her dad are providing colorful commentary on the suitors as the compete for her hand.

16) Dude...

Merida: “I am Merida, first born descendant of clan Dunbroch. And I’ll be shooting for my OWN hand!”

Okay first:

Second: THIS FREAKING SCENE!!!!!

This entire scene has become wildly iconic, and one could say it was so upon release. It is by far the best scene in the entire film, supported by strong character writing, sleek simplicity, and incredible visuals. It is the turning point for the movie. The time when Merida is at her strongest and we as the audience or most enthralled with the plot of the movie. I truly love it.

17) Elinor roughing up Merida and throwing her bow in the fire after the archery contest always made me uncomfortable. It is hard to watch the queen get physically rough with her daughter, even if it isn’t really abusive. I think that’s the point of the moment though: we as the audience (or at least me as an audience member) can really imagine how shook up Merida must feel from this encounter. This is her MOM! Even though they have their differences there’s supposed to be a trust there.

18) The Woodcarver!!!

Voiced by Julie Walters (Molly Weasley herself), The Woodcarver/Witch is a wildly memorable and funny character. She is well established and well used in her brief amount of screen time, providing the film with a sense of visual comedy that feels like it’s straight out of a Bugs Bunny cartoon. I truly appreciate that.

19) Have you heard of Pixar Theory?

Pixar Theory is the in depth theory that all Pixar films take place in one shared continuity/universe, even going into some dark details about how the world of Cars can be the same one that the human filled world of Up or The Incredibles is in. There is one very key and very important idea in Pixar Theory that applies to Brave. Are you guys ready? Okay...

The Witch from Brave is Boo from Monsters Inc.

You can read the full theory here, but the gist of it is that Monsters Inc. does not take place in an alternate dimension but in a future Earth without humans. Therefore, the doors in Monsters Inc. allow the characters to travel in time. Here’s an excerpt from the theory:

And then there’s Boo. What do you think happened to her? She saw everything take place in future earth where “kitty” was able to talk. She became obsessed with finding out what happened to her friend Sully and why animals in her time weren’t quite as smart as the ones she’d seen in the future.

She remembers that “doors” are the key to how she found Sully in the first place and becomes…

A WITCH. Yes, Boo is the witch from Brave. She figures out how to travel in time to find Sully, and goes back to what she believes is the source: The will-of-the-wisps.

A carving of Sully can briefly be seen in the Woodcarver’s/Witch’s hut, lending support to the theory.

Later Merida is also opening doors that lead nowhere, and the author of Pixar Theory argues this is because The Witch found out how to get doors to travel between time. I just thought I’d share this with you. Moving on.

20)

Merida [when she tells the witch what she wants]: “I want a spell to change my mom. That’ll change my fate.”

According to IMDb:

It took six years to make this film. Mark Andrews was initially the consultant, providing the Scottish themes for Brenda Chapman. However, by October 2010, Chapman left after four years of work with Andrews subsequently taking over but still keeping the intended story that Chapman wrote. Originally 80% of the film took place in snow, but when Chapman left the project so did much of the white stuff.

Part of the film’s issue with focus is that it can at times feel like two different films at once: a fantasy epic and a mother/daughter story. I assume these issues are born out of the change in directors (although Brenda Chapman does claim the film is something she’s proud of and that it kept her original vision) and at the end they do mesh well, but they don’t necessarily mesh well throughout the ENTIRE movie.

21) I’m going to be honest: the fact that the big magical twist of the movie is that Elinor is turned into a bear caught me 100% off guard the first time I saw it.

I like it now in hindsight but I was just totally blind sided upon initial viewing. Which was actually kind of nice, because I’d seen 165 films in less than three years before then. I’m not surprised as much as I’d like.

22) The rare time in a film where a character actually says what I’m thinking:

Merida [when Elinor wants to go to the "Let’s Kill a Bear” party downstairs]: “Dad? The Bear King!? If he so much as sees you you’re dead!”

23) This is so applicable to so many talking animal films.

Merida [to Elinor]: “You’re covered in fur! You’re not naked!”

24) So The Witch is sort of a one trick pony. She turned Mordu into a bear, she turned Merida’s mom into a bear, and later she describes her shop as, “Home of bear themed carvings and novelties.” Like, is that like all she can do? Turn people into bears?

25) The scene at the river (underscored by “Into the Open Air”) is a key moment in the relationship between Merida and Elinor. Elinor finally sees that all the things she wanted of her daughter have no use to her now, while all the things “unbefitting” to a princess are what’s keeping them fed in the wilderness. They have some nice fun and it’s just a really great moment.

26) Momma Bear Elinor almost attacking Merida when she’s full bear mode almost kinda makes me jump.

(GIF originally posted by @musicalhog)

27) I wish we got a bit more of the evil bear Mor’du. He shows up in the beginning, he shows up briefly in the middle so Merida and her mom can understand how the spell works, and then he shows up at the end. He’s actually very frightening to look at but not in the film much which is a shame.

28) Merida’s whole speech before the clans about her final decision is a really great moment, I think. It shows how Merida and her mother have grown as they’re finally able to communicate (ironically/poetically when Elinor can’t speak), it shows Merida’s skills as a leader, and it is nice that all three sons agree with Merida about choosing their own destiny. Also Merida is just so happy afterwards!

29) Merida thinking her mom is gone breaks my heart.

Yeah, I’m tearing up now as I watch it. It’s been a rough month for me.

30) The ending of the film is nice. Filled with optimism and energy, in no small part because of the Birdy and Mumford & Sons song “Learn Me Right”. It’s a nice note to finish the film on.

31) Always. Stay. After. The credits.

Look I don’t get why Brave gets a bad wrap. Sure it’s not as brilliant as Up or Toy Story 3 but so what? It is a fun, entertaining, well made film with some wildly powerful moments and great characters. Merida is incredible, the relationship between her mom is fleshed out very well, and it’s just...I love it. It’s one of my favorite Pixar films, so I definitely recommend it.

[flopostslove]

2017 ~ A year in review pt.2

JUNE

June was a month of rest, relatively speaking!  

Only one ceremony to perform for the gorgeous Anna and Kenny…

And what a blast we had, the hottest weekend of the year (full stop I think), another glorious outdoor ceremony, we all started melting slightly though and I had to lend the groom my fan as he stood there in full kilt and caboodle. 

We celebrated all things Celtic, as Scottish and Welsh roots combined; a handfasting, Quaich and fabulous reading by the Groom’s dad in his wonderful Scottish lilting accent. I was heckled by the unforgiving crowd as I told them obviously when it came to rugby…there was only one team…. but I redeemed myself as we wove through their love story and we ended with cheers and applause and just the best day!

Kev was their photographer and we caught some fabulous moments for them and left way later than scheduled because what had been a wonderful day turned into a fantastic quintessential balmy summers evening and we were loathe to leave the party, but leave we must and so at nearly 11 o’clock at night we chatted all the way home, full of the joys of such a wonderful day…. oh and the promise of another one yet to come…. I’ll introduce you to Gareth and Wayne in August!

JULY

 My busiest month ever!  8 ceremonies!  5 in 4 days. …Hold onto your hats!

The 1st day of the month (pinch punch) found Kev and I working together once again…bit of a habit this Mr T!

For the wedding ceremony of Sammi and Lee…SQUEEEEEE…. two beyond gorgeous human beings!!

Lee’s parents had been prepping their back garden for the best part of a year for their ceremony and we had everything crossed for a perfect summers day…we got it!

We had such a laid back and chilled day with a couple that were up for anything. I know that their wedding photos certainly captured their fun personalities and their insistence on including us in their wedding breakfast was gratefully received. It was a long but such a brilliant day, as we had to wait for the sun to set to try and get the perfect sparkler picture! Despite the mozzies trying to eat me we achieved it with the help of some of the bridal party.

Sue and Colin tied the knot a few days later in Felixstowe at the Orwell Hotel, oh we had such a giggle, especially as Colin is originally from the Black Country & I being a Brummie, could not resist the temptation to slip into a bit of local lingo part way through the ceremony.  Love has no boundaries, it’s fair to say that our two lovebirds found each other later in life and bonded over a mutual love of all things! There really is nothing that these two can’t debate or share or take an interest in and I know in each other they have found a new lease of life. They really are soul mates who have found their own equilibrium and now each other. A truly beautiful love story that I was privileged to play a small part in bringing to life.

  Sara and Tommy, their story should be made into a film, it had me in tears. Injustice and joy in equal amounts, how they met, fell in love, married, got torn apart by circumstances and had to endure a long distance marriage for the longest of times before being reunited on Christmas day…forever…We got to celebrate in proper transatlantic style as we welcomed a little bit of America to deepest darkest Essex and one of my favourite venues, Crabbs Barn.

I taught the Americans about Brown sauce and they taught me about fabulous cowboy boots as Tommy and Sara got to celebrate their anniversary in style with a ceremony they never really had when they first got married.

Boy… did those tears flow and a beautiful family inspired sand ceremony topped the day off as two did indeed finally and properly become one.

Welcome to Blighty Tommy…have you learnt the offside rule yet?

 My ‘mad’ weekend kicked off with the wedding of Dawn and Matt at Captains Wood Barn, in the beautiful woodland clearing. It was a bittersweet celebration of love and family as we remembered someone very dear who could not be there in any other way than spirit. I know you did him proud though Matt.

The kids behaved beautifully and some stunning photos captured the poignant moments of the handfasting and jumping the broom and the kids got to join in with it too…so sweet

 We were running slightly late due to the Bride’s transport not turning up, but the hairdresser saved the day by bringing her and her maids to the ceremony in her old VW camper van…phew.

The sound guy had a suspected heart attack whilst setting up, so some frantic calls were made to get that sorted as the paramedics attended to him (luckily heart attack ruled out, but he still had to go to hospital) and the heavens threatened to open part way through the ceremony, but luckily the rain held off until we were all safely back in the barn…. phew AGAIN! 

  No such luck though as I made my way across to Nicola and Jason’s venue. Danbury Country Park…Only 9 miles away, the difference in the weather was rather stark…it was excellent weather for ducks!

The heavens literally opened as the bride made her way to the ceremony area in her open top horse drawn carriage resplendent in her 50’s dress and beehive up do…Luckily they had had the foresight to erect a couple of gazebos for protection as I dived under one to conduct the ceremony…They stood under their wedding arch with an umbrella and it all went swimmingly…literally!!! 

We had such a laugh, torrential rain was never gonna dampen our spirits and as per usual, when faced with adversity there is nothing like rising to the challenge!

 The carriage had a roof that was hastily put up ready for their trip back to the farm for their party and everyone left, slightly damp but with the biggest smiles certainly a wedding day they will never forget… and anyway, it’s good luck if it rains on your wedding day anyway…right?

Well the following day, the weather was still being resistant to my charms and was alternating between sunshine and showers…. We were aiming for an outdoor ceremony at Marks Hall for Helen and Matthew, but the weather gods were certainly not playing ball and after much umming and ahhing we had to plump for an indoor ceremony …2 hours later than scheduled due to the seating having to be rearranged and the registrar squeezed in for the legal’s…

A beautiful snowy owl flew in the rings and with a bit of revision the ceremony went well but all of the choreography went out of the window…. Being able to think on your feet is a major priority for all celebrants…Stay calm, there is always a Plan B or C…

They concluded their ceremony with the tying of a fisherman’s knot, an unusual take on the handfasting idea.

Two cords represent each as an individual -encompassing all of the unique and special gifts they bring to a marriage.

As the cords are fastened together, the actions represent the joining of two lives into one common purpose. Although the fisherman's knot is one of the simplest to tie, it is also one of the sturdiest. As stress is applied, the knot becomes ever stronger just as a marriage should!

 Monday saw me wending my way back into Suffolk and Christchurch Mansion in Ipswich, the honour of being the first celebrant at the venue did not go unnoticed… by now I had given up on the weather being anything other than what it was…. Normal for England in July…bloody horrible!!

But we enjoyed a fabulous ceremony as Jessica and Billy tied the knot with a handfasting in another fabulous historic venue. I’d met this lovely couple over a year before at a wedding fair, with her mum.

We had got chatting about what I could do as a celebrant and their eyes just lit up…They did have a registrar booked but were finding themselves being so restricted they were resigning themselves to not quite having the day they wanted…. Well it all changed in a heartbeat and they got exactly what they wanted!  Billy and Jess were absolutely wonderful to work with as we created their dream ceremony. I love it when a plan comes together for all involved and love wins.

  Sophia and Adrian rounded off the month for me. Mr & Mrs Pocket Watch and Petticoat had a weddingfest  to remember, in a field on a farm with a proper pucker festival vibe going on. We had singing, we had dancing, we had such a blast, and this was during the ceremony!

Live music during the reception, food and drink stalls, and a chilled out vibe that so complimented them and their families. Luckily we managed to complete the ceremony before the rain kicked in, but again, the bride was of the opinion, ‘so what, rain just means everyone stays in the tipi to dance the afternoon and evening away, win, win’!

A gift of a rose to the children with promises to love and cherish them, singing, dancing and an all round happy glow…magical….

AUGUST

I had to do a Sundance for Zoe and Patrick’s big day, it absolutely tipped it down in the preceding couple of hours and I thought we were going to get drenched at our fabulous riverside venue. But literally as I pulled up in the car park the sun came out and shone all afternoon, my wellies were rather hot and sticky in the end, but given the amount of rain we had suffered that week I thought they were a prudent and essential piece of kit, hey ho.

 Zoe and Pat are in a band and I was (still am a bit) well jel to know they know Dave Gahan and the rest of Depeche Mode in person, having toured with them a couple of times!  Our Greek twist on the Polish Bread, salt and vodka ceremony went down well and they managed to avoid hitting the guests with their shot glasses as they threw them over their shoulders, hehe.  I loved all the little touches they incorporated to keep their guests happy and entertained as they partied the day away. 

 Another first at a new venue, Tudor Barn saw Kelly and Ben kick off their married life with a lot of football references and a ref’s whistle.

We had everyone join in with the brides brothers favourite hymn as a child in tribute to a much love family member who is no longer with us…AND we even had the hand actions much to everyone’s delight and mirth.

I can admit it now, as I don’t think the groom is on FB…wellllll…Kelly and I cheated…just a little bit when it came to their version of the bread and vodka ceremony…She insisted I told her which shot glass held the vodka before the ceremony started, hehehe…she was determined to be the one to drink it!

For those not familiar with this ritual, a couple share bread so they won’t know hunger, place a speck of salt on their tongue so they wont no bitterness in their marriage. Then they exchange a silver coin each so they won’t know poverty in the marriage and finally…2 shot glasses are placed on the table, one contains vodka, the other water. The couple don’t know which is which and chose their glass blindly. Whoever chooses the vodka, rules the roost. A bit of fun, especially when once drunk the shot glasses are thrown over the shoulder and disposed of (luckily we use plastic ones so no damage to the environment caused)

Pauline and Sarah had a cracking handfasting ceremony at White Dove Barn in Suffolk, a beautiful intimate venue where friends and family joined them from all over the world. Having reassured Granny that their hands being tied wasn’t some weird 50 Shades of Grey homage, we giggled our way through the rest of the ceremony and I had a photo with someone who was dressed in a ‘louder’ outfit than me…and that takes some doing I can tell you!

  I had a very busy weekend next with a trip to Hertfordshire and London for 2 ceremonies. Firstly a windy ceremony under canvas at the Robin Hood and Little John just outside of Stevenage for Rebecca and Darren.

His gran presenting the groom with his granddads flat cap at the end of the ceremony was the sweetest of gestures and ensured that he was with us in spirit throughout the ceremony and indeed for the rest of the day.

A quick drive into London and to a rowing Club on the bank of the Thames for the most challenging of ceremonies!  Gareth and Wayne, 2 gorgeous human beings whose photographer very nearly got a mouthful from me! She got between us, was taking photos over my shoulder and then got tangled up in the balloons causing the ceremony to grind to a halt as we untangled her!!

I was given free reign like never before in the adlibbing department and I had people screaming with laughter as the boys tried to upstage one another and I had to call order. All in good taste and humour, but they certainly had me thinking on my feet!

Now… Gareth and Wayne, by their own admission … are somewhat prone to the odd argument or two…so I thought, to be on the safe side, we would include a truce bell ceremony AND a first argument box! 

The truce bell was rung during the ceremony by them both and then was to be used to, in the event of an argument, call time out so that they could go into

separate rooms and calm down a bit before CALMLY talking through any issues.

 If this wasn’t enough on its own they had a bottle of wine each too, and a love letter…to remind each other of who they were and why they had fallen in love and got married in the first place!  A great couple of fun elements to add to the ceremony indeed!

 It was a very interesting afternoon and evening as I stayed on to be Mistress of Ceremonies for the boys. The cake needs a mention on its own, an amazing creation, it looked just likes a piece of modern art and my photo doesn’t do it justice! Tasted fabulous too!!!

Carly and Ben had a wonderful chilled out handfasting at the Museum of East Anglian Life in Stowmarket. Carly was glowing and the love was palpable. Everyone crying and smiling in equal measure and I HAVE to say my all time favourite entrance and recessional music choices…Coldplay A Sky Full Of Stars and Paradise…I was in musical heaven!

The bride wanted to acknowledge how important her granddad was to her and worried the entrance might be a bit too long a walk for him we decided that she would enter with her nephews but pause at the top of the aisle next to her granddad and give him a big kiss. The whole family just melted at that point and I must admit I had a bit of a tear in my eye too. I just love the little twists that we can incorporate into a ceremony that makes it perfect for each couple.