#beyond cooked. I'm charred. flambeéd.
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I think it's time .
#//come and keep your comrade warm!#what more could a switch want than a dangerous russian spy whose entire disguise is being a cringefail dork. wdym I'm insane.#do you see my vision. i can scratch his lil ears and grab his horns and shove my tongue in his mouth til he forgets what he's even there for#and once he REMEMBERS he can lovingly condescend me in russian for being too trusting while shoving his knee between my legs#awkward cute goat dude who would feel irresistibly warm and soft if i stuck a hand up his shirt.#guy whose tail goes haywire the closer your hand gets to where he wants it. bf who lays down like a good boy so you can kiss him all over#I want to overstimulate him sooo bad he's white bread if it were a man but he's nice and well intentioned#and apparently that's enough to make me want to give you head nowadays. sad!#but also hello i do not know how to handle the russian spy thing. i have been so normal about it on main.#the three ppl that followed me here need to know how good of a job i've been doing of BEING NORMAL ABOUT NIKOLAI#LIKE HAHA. hahahaha. you are a national threat gone widely unnoticed and spend all of your time carefully crafting a good natured persona#and you were also given only one episode to be vaguely expanded on so my brain can go crazy with how you actually behave#like i don't think he's an evil mastermind. i don't think he's evil. he's the secret second thing that still makes murder ethical to you#and also makes you hotter sorry#i am a nightmare to the US instinctual red scare. if you put a communist in front of me I'm gonna wanna fuck him I'm sorry#especially when he's THAT cute how am i not supposed to want him to groan in my ear and show me that he's much more in charge than I think#beyond cooked. I'm charred. flambeéd.
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