#better than his bow wow wow in fire :/

[kirain]

Your headcanon that Emmrich's right arm is always gloved because he has scars from when he tried to pull his parents out of a collapsed burning building is now OFFICIAL canon as far as I'm concerned. Can we please get a fic of Emmrich being self conscious about the scars? 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼

Oh wow, thank you! 🥺 Here you go, anon!

The fire crackled in the hearth, filling the room with an ominous orange glow that seemed to taunt Emmrich. Vae sat opposite of him, her hands resting in her lap as she waited. Though usually cheery and confident, Emmrich trembled ever so slightly, his head bowed as though the weight of the moment pressed heavily on his shoulders.

"All right," he whispered.

Vae reached out, her touch light as she took his gloved hand in hers. "I'll go slow," she said softly.

Despite her promise, Emmrich's breath hitched, his back tensing. As she began to slip off the ornate rings and bracelets that adorned his fingers and wrists with a gentle tug, his eyes squinted shut, his brow furrowed and twitching. When the last piece of jewelry fell into her palm, he flinched, and Vae paused, worry overtaking her curiosity.

Quickly, her hand moved to cup his cheek. "It's all right," she soothed, her thumb brushing against his skin. "You're all right."

His breathing steadied just enough for her to continue. Carefully, she removed the heavy bracer next, the worn leather scraping against the golden rim as it slid free.

"You're doing great," Vae praised as she set it down on the night stand. "We're almost there."

But when she reached for his glove, Emmrich suddenly pulled his arm away. "I'm sorry," he wheezed. "I can't."

Vae froze, her heart twisting at the anguish in his voice. His expression was one of shame, his face turning away from her. After a moment, she reached out again and guided him back.

"Emmrich," she said, her tone laden with compassion. "Look at me. Please." He hesitated, but opened his eyes to meet hers, the vulnerability in his gaze almost too much for her to bear. "I won't push you," she vowed. "But you need to know—nothing about you could ever disgust me."

He sighed deeply, shivering under the weight of his self-doubt. "The scars... they're unseemly," he warned, gripping his wrist so hard it caused Vae to wince. "It's already a miracle you want to be with an old codger like me. My body is—"

"Stop," Vae pressed, forcing a playful smirk. "You're in better shape than I am."

A weak chuckle escaped him, though it carried a deluge of sadness. For her, he was trying to push through, masking the pain beneath, but she realised the truth.

He wasn't ready.

"All right," she said, rising to her feet. "Let's get some dinner, then."

"Vae?"

"Sweetheart, I said I'm not going to push you. I never wanted to make you uncomfortable, but you clearly are." She gestured to the door without a hint of malice or disappointment. "I can wait, however long it takes. For tonight, let's forget this and have a nice—"

Before she took a step, Emmrich's hand shot out, grasping her wrist with surprising persistence. "Wait," he begged, his voice cracking.

She turned back, startled to find him glaring up at her with wide, pleading eyes.

"I'm sorry," he stammered, releasing his grip. "I do want to do this. It's just... I'm frightened it will change the way you see me."

Vae's expression softened, and she knelt before him, placing a tender hand on his knee. "Emmrich, do you really think so little of me?"

He froze, guilt flickering across his face. "What? No, of course not! I only meant—!"

His jaw clenched, the contradiction hitting him like a bolt of divine judgement. Vae was young, but she was a woman, and she had chosen to be with him—for better or worse. To assume she would leave him over his past, over some marred skin, was indeed an insult to her character.

But it wasn't true. He trusted her. However difficult, however loudly the voice in his head screamed that she'd recoil at the sight, he trusted her, and he wanted to prove it—even though he knew she'd never demand it. Slowly, he took a breath and offered his arm, the motion hesitant but resolute.

Vae gasped, staring up at him. "Are you sure?"

"Yes," he whispered. "I'm sure."

"All right, then. Stop me, if it's too much for you."

With the utmost care, Vae began to unbutton the long glove, her fingers working indulgently until the fabric slipped free. What lay beneath made her heart ache: a web of burn scars stretched across the top of Emmrich's hand, climbing up and around his forearm. The angry, uneven texture spoke of unimaginable pain and resilience.

"Darling..."

There were so many things she wanted to say, but as the image of an innocent boy crying out for help flashed in her mind, all she could do was stare; not with disgust, but with sorrow for the suffering he had endured.

But Emmrich misunderstood her silence, and his incessant need to fill the quiet overwhelmed him. "It got pinned under debris," he explained, his voice shaking. "Burning rubble, when I tried to clear the wreckage for my parents. I know it's hideous. I have full mobility, but the epidermis never healed quite—"

Before he could finish, Vae leaned in and pressed her lips to the top of his discoloured knuckles. The simple act silenced him, his words catching in his throat.

When she pulled back, she hugged his arm to her chest, holding it like a precious artefact. "I love you, Emmrich," she said, her voice thick with emotion. "Scars and all. They're a part of you, and they make you even more beautiful in my eyes."

He whimpered, then pulled her into a tight embrace, his scarred hand cradling her head. Though his reaction was unexpected, Vae smiled and leaned into his chest, her arms wrapping around him like a vice.

"Thank you," he sobbed, his scorched fingers quivering in her hair. "Thank you, my darling."

"You silly man," she moaned, her own eyes welling with tears. "You have nothing to thank me for."

In that moment, the pain Emmrich always seemed to feel disappeared, the weight lifted. His whole life, he'd seen those gruesome marks as a reminder of his failure, but Vae saw something else entirely.

A symbol of his devotion and bravery.

[mya-valentine]

What if the league of villains had a S/O who is a petty savage? (Like Jade West from victorias or Sam Puckett from icarly) she's all sweet and nice but if any hero/ other villain, say something about her lover. That person better count their blessings and say their prayers because they're in for a rude awakening.🤣

Headcanon: L.O.V. With a Petty S/O

A/N: Sorry, this took entirely way too long 😭 and if you can't tell, I had so much fun writing this

Kurogiri

Kurogiri appreciates your duality—you're refined and polite, but if someone dares disrespect him, suddenly, you're threatening to shove them into one of his portals permanently.

He never has to raise his voice because you're already doing it for him, standing up for him like a protective attack dog in designer boots.

A hero once called him "Shigaraki’s babysitter"—you made sure they tripped into one of his warps and ended up miles away from where they were supposed to be.

"Oh, I'm sorry, was that your dignity I just threw into the abyss? Oops."

Mr. Compress

You have so much fun verbally wrecking people with him. He’ll roast someone in a classy, theatrical way, and you’ll come in with the finishing blow that leaves them speechless.

Someone insults his mask? Snatch. Now it's your mask, and you'll return it when they apologize.

A hero tried to be snarky about his missing arm—you made sure their boots were suddenly glued to the ground. "Wow, must be hard moving forward with a disadvantage, huh?"

He’s obsessed with how protective you are. He always bows dramatically and goes, "My hero," whenever you absolutely annihilate someone on his behalf.

Tomura Shigaraki

Listen, he’s the one who’s usually petty, but you? You take it to another level. You once spent a whole week making a pro hero’s life hell because they insulted his gaming skills.

"What did you say about my man? No, no, don’t backtrack now, you were talking big a second ago."

You handle the verbal attacks while he just stands there, scratching his neck and watching you go feral. He’s got heart eyes the entire time.

He once complained about Endeavor, and you immediately took it upon yourself to send an anonymous package filled with insults disguised as a fan letter.

Dabi

Dabi lives for the drama. Someone tries to roast him? Oh, babe, go ahead. Cook them.

You’re constantly out-pettying heroes and even other villains. You once used a hero's own catchphrase against them in an argument, and Dabi nearly set the building on fire from laughter.

Hawks made a slick comment about Dabi once—you made sure his next mission was full of unexpected inconveniences. "Wow, Hawks, those wings working slower than usual? Must be karma."

Dabi will 100% instigate. "Babe, did you hear what they said about me?" (They didn’t even say anything, he just wants to watch the chaos.)

Spinner

Spinner is not used to someone going feral on his behalf. At first, he's a little overwhelmed, but deep down? He loves it.

"You—you don’t have to go that hard for me—okay, you’re already doing it."

Someone once made a lizard joke at his expense, and before he could even react, you went, "Oh, I'm sorry, are you a biologist? No? Then shut your damn mouth."

You once fought someone in a GameStop parking lot because they insulted his gaming skills.

Twice

"Babe, you don’t have to—OH, YOU'RE ALREADY SWINGING!"

Twice adores you. Someone calls him unstable? You’re already in their face, asking if they’d like to experience real instability.

You once wrote a detailed list of all the reasons a hero sucked and left it in their locker. Twice kept a copy for fun.

He gets really emotional about how protective you are. "WOW, NO ONE’S EVER FOUGHT FOR ME LIKE THAT BEFORE! MARRY ME! No, seriously, marry me!"

Himiko Toga

You and Toga together? Dangerous. She already loves chaos, but you? You make sure the disrespect is handled properly.

Someone once called her creepy, and you made sure their social media was permanently ruined. "Oops, did I post that embarrassing childhood photo of you? Guess you shouldn’t have run your mouth."

She adores how savage you are. Sometimes she just sics you on people for fun. "Oh no, babe, they said something so mean about me—go get 'em!"

If someone flirts with her in front of you? You stare at them until they leave, and she finds it absolutely hilarious.

.

.

.

Masterlist

[inmaki2]

thinking about..

reader losing to a bet that they made with one of the luxiem guys...and having to wear a maid outfit...bonus points if they are forced to wear cat ears.

Yours truly "pancake SLAP"

i got a bit carried away but. pancake nonnie u genius….!!!

a confident smile shines across luca’s lips. “how about whoever loses has to wear a maid oufit?”

this question now haunted you; the beginning of a disaster filled with humiliation on your end and a fun night for your blonde-haired boyfriend.

it was a losing fight, he was already hyped up enough at the thought of beating you, but now, seeing you wear a maid outfit — something you’d never wear otherwise — only added flame to the fire.

and now here you were, huffing as you glance at yourself in the mirror, tying the outfit’s white bow around your waist nice and pretty for the idiot sitting outside. the frilly headband on your head made you inwardly cringe, dreading the thought of taking a single foot outside.

“ay, stop stalling!” of course, he knew you too well.

either way, you yanked the bedroom door open. a furious blush dusting your cheeks as you look anywhere but your boyfriend who perks up attentively from the couch.

his eyes scan you up and down with every step you make closer, a large hand lowering to play with your skirt’s frills as he mumbles, “holy shit, you look even better than i imagined, babe..”

before you can react, the same hand is swiftly moving underneath to reach your panties, expertly finding your clit and massaging it through the soaked fabric.

“luca—“ immediately, he cuts you off.

“wow, and you’re already this wet? kinda.. kinda pathetic, no?” he scoffs, and you can only blink up in surprise. luca was never one to degrade you or be anything more than a soft dom in bed, but you can’t deny that the sudden switch in your puppy boyfriend is turning you on a little.

“you’re supposed to be my nice maid today, but instead you’re just dripping all over my hand like a slut.”

sighing dramatically, luca stands up, leaving his white tee on (to your disappointment) but pulling down his gym shorts and boxers. hypocritically, his body is clearly just as riled up as yours considering the precum dripping from his tip, but you know better than to speak up on that. “on your knees. c’mon, i think you owe me.”

you gulp, fiddling with your skirt. “we should go to the bedroo—“

a harsh palm abruptly guides you down by the shoulder, your knees hitting the hard floor and mouth now face-to-face with his erection. “maids don’t talk back,” he scolds, still smirking as you look up at him defenselessly. “now suck.”

sorry it ends at the best part it’s 2am 😞!!

[msfantasy-comics]

The Perfect Match

Roy Harper x Reader

Summary: A head cannon in which you are Roy’s perfect match.

Masterlist - Tip Jar

Independence

Throughout Roy’s developmental years, he was always treated with excessive handholding, rules and over exertion of authority.

This has led Roy to feel resentful of constraints.

In his former years, Roy relished the freedom and exercising autonomy through the Outlaws.

Roy really appreciates the sense of freedom you give in your relationship.

Roy: “Would you be upset if I cancel our date tonight? Jason’s back in town.”

You were fully dressed up, ready for your hot date.

Y/n: “Nope.”

And you really meant it.

You took advantage of your hot fit and took yourself on a date.

The flexibility you give him is one of the key factors to your loving relationship.

Adventurous Spirit

Given Roy has spent most of his free time training and practicing the art of archery, Roy needs a romantic partner who shares the passion of adventure.

Roy: “Wow… I never seen anyone shoot the ground when the target is only 5 meters away.

Y/n: “I was just testing the bow resistance…”

Roy: “Uh-huh…”

Whilst you may not be the most talented archer or most fit individual. You are always keen to try and participate.

Your enthusiasm to do better is infectious and Roy just loves and appreciates your willingness to try and do better, especially when it comes to his interests.

Y/n: “Roy did you see, did you see?! I hit the outer ring!”

Supportive and Empathetic

Roy has had to endure many hardships throughout his developmental years which has plagued him every so often during his adult hood such as;

Addiction issues - not only does Roy have past entanglements with addictions which leads him to live a clean life. He had developed a critical eye for intentions, as a trusted friend was the cause to his addiction. Now, Roy analyses everything for deeper motivations. That’s just the result of the trauma and it’s a the reality in which you had accept. Whilst it can be insulting and exhausting to be under the microscope, you always speak your mind freely and bluntly.

Relationship dynamic of being in a team - it’s a struggle for Roy to build trust in others due to his past experiences. He has trouble letting people in, but once your in, you most certainly not getting out. You appreciate the value in which Roy holds you and makes you feel extra safe and comfortable knowing that Roy, no matter what, will always be there for you.

Responsibility as a hero - Roy has had to endure the heavy burden of protecting society as nothing more than a well trained human. Society is never short of criticism and Roy is hard on himself enough as it is. This can lead to feeling emotionally and physically strained. Roy cannot handle the criticism of his short comings when it comes to his romantic entanglements too.

Roy: “Y/n, baby, I’m so sorry I missed your birthday party, it’s just, this woman, and her child-“

Y/n: “Roy! I had the best birthday ever! I took lots of photos, so you could see it all when you finished your patrol. But we can do that later, do you want me to draw you a bath? Have you eaten yet?”

Roy: *pant* “aren’t you-“ *pant* “upset with me?”

Y/n: “Don’t be a silly goose, I know you wouldn’t miss anything intentionally, must’ve been really important. We’ve been together for years, think I don’t know you by now?”

Sense of Humor

Even in the hardest of times, it’s at times easier to just have a laugh.

Roy appreciates that you don’t take difficult situations to seriously and just have a laugh with him.

Roy thinks your extra-adorable since you kept notes on his funniest one-liners.

"Some days, I wish I was a firefighter. All you have to worry about is fire."

"We're supposed to be professionals, yet here we are, running around in spandex, talking to ourselves."

"All these costume changes, and I'm still trying to figure out my life."

In a crowd full of hero’s your laughter amongst the dead silence is always appreciated.

[lovelyyandereaddictionpoint]

The fire pillar from demon slayer meeting Exsotica as she heading to a lord house to entertain them but the run to a carrange probably and they both happen to meet

Meeting someone other worldly and kind would be something

Exotica | Meeting the Flame Hashira

Well first and foremost this would never happen cannon storyline

By the time you show up in this universe it's almost a year or two before Kyojuro is fated to die

But with the tidbit dropped in the Art headcannon it’d seem that Kagaya would eventually summon you to the estate

But that couldn’t be the case because you never can’t leave the Yukaku District

Daki and Gyutarou have been ordered to hold you there 

And of course, the Red light district suddenly becoming more famous for your existence would sooner send the art of you than sending you on your own

They’d risk losing you to bandits, obsessed fans, demons

It would just be too much for the Red District to lose their favorite cash cow

Not to mention if Kyojuro ever stepped foot near any of the houses

There’s no way that both sides would remain clueless

Kyojuro’s too adept for that Daki and Gyutarou would never let this fly on account of That Man’s orders 

The conditions for this meet would rely on the luck Exotica does not have, and it can’t be too far from the Yukaku District:

“HELLO THERE FAIR MAIDEN!”

You were by the river taking a rest from your travels and from the carriage that housed Warabihime. You didn’t mind spending extended hours in Daki’s disguise, in fact, you preferred it. Her clinginess was kept to a minimum and she’s in a much better mood; usually too distracted by you to badger her own staff. But you were able to excuse yourself heading into the sunlight to relieve yourself as well as get a look at the majestic scenery you could only read about in manga/only fawn over in anime. Either way, you sent a smile and greeted the demon slayer. 

You recognized him immediately—who wouldn’t, but you refrained from expressing any sorrow. Instead offering to give him food. You had plenty in abundance having done the Edo equivalent of a celebrities tour. And you happily sat with the Hashira as he munched on his provided meal.

“YUM! YUM! DELICIOUS!”

You let yourself giggle, drawing the fiery eyes of the Hashira as he tilted his head into confusion. 

“I don’t mean to sound like I’m making fun of you. I’m just curious as to why your so vocal while eating?”

The hashira finished his bite giving you his glowing smile. 

“I BELIEVE IT’S BEST TO VOICE EVERYTHING YOUR HEART! ESPECIALLY WHEN THAT CHANCE MIGHT BE TAKEN FROM YOU!”

“Wow, it sounds as though…your speaking from experience.”

He gave a hearty laugh before continuing to eat befor cleating his mouth once again. 

“ON THAT NOTE, I’D LIKE TO SAY YOU’RE ABSOULUTELY BEWITCHING! MARRY ME!” 

“Haha Rengoku-san, you’re very funny but I don’t think I can.”

“HAHA PERSISTENCE IS A VIRTUE TOO MANY LOSE HEART THAT WAY! MARRY ME!” 

He would repeat the same declaration all throughout your break before one of the young maidens called you on behalf of the oiran. When the time came you bowed to him, encouraging the hashira on his way. Before you depart he grabs your hand, and with a grim theme to his expression he gave you a promise.

“I WASN’T JESTING WHEN I PROPOSED THIS TO YOU. ONCE MY MISSION IS COMPLETE I WILL FIND YOU AND MARRY YOU. SAFE TRAVELS MY FLAME.”

Releasing you to begin his jovial trek to whatever mission he was on. Standing still in genuine stupor you were broken out by Warabihime’s calls. Returning to the carriage you urged the demon’s worried cries as well as your own. 

‘What was that and why did it feel so…true?’

[trevorsimp]

Can you do Sasappis x Isaac please 🙏

I Have Never

Request: ^^^

Pairing: Sasappis x Isaac

Summary: Sas and Isaac pass the time playing a game. Patience interrupts them.

Notes: 543Words. yearning.

--------

Sasappis sat in the dark cave with Isaac somewhere in the dirt beneath Woodstone Manor. Patience had left to two to wait for her wherever she had gone off to. With no way to tell time, the two found ways to pass the time. Sas had told Isaac a story about how he tracked and hunted a deer, and Isaac shared a similar story. Instead of killing the dear with a bow and arrow, Isaac killed it with a gun. Instead of using the meat for food and antlers for tools, he hung the antlers on his wall.

“Wow, how different life was just in just two hundred years,” Isaac said.

“Yes, it is amazing how invaders can change an entire way of life by stealing land and pushing out its inhabitants,” Sas said.

“Yes, well,” Isaac said, “You do have your point there.”

Isaac cleared his throat, “Perhaps we can learn other differences. Samantha mentioned a game where you share things that you have never done, you hold all of your fingers up and put a finger down for each thing you have done that the other person has. The last person holding their fingers up loses.”

“Alright,” Sas said, “Let’s try it. You go first.”

“Hm,” Isaac thought for a moment before saying, “I have never started my own fire.”

Sas put a finger down, “Is that true? Not even during the war?”

“Heavens now, the men beneath me did the kindling,” Isaac laughed, “I didn’t get my hands dirty… though dirty hands did lead to my untimely death. Your turn.”

“I have never… had a bachelor party.”

Isaac put a finger down, “Quite targeted. No matter. I have never carved into a tree to denote each time a fancy of mine said hello to me.”

Sas scowled.

“I have never dated someone that I killed,” Sas said.

Isaac frowned, “This game is more mean-spirited than I expected.”

“You started it!”

“Oh, Sas, don’t be so childish,” Isaac waved his hand at Sas, “Let’s be nice. I have never cared for the smell of pizza.”

Sas put his third finger down.

“I have never been married,” Sas said, “or engaged.”

Isaac put two fingers down, “How sad, neither man nor woman?”

“The only relationships I’ve had in the past 500 years are a car ghost and Jay in his dreams posing as a woman,” Sas said.

Isaac nodded, “I know, that didn’t make it better.”

“You’re one to talk.”

Isaac huffed, “This game is no fun. Well, at least we never faked a relationship with a cholera ghost like Pete.”

“Or dated a woman who murdered her husband and fled the country.”

Isaac laughed and swatted at Sas’s chest, “You are too much.”

The two shared a longing glance. Isaac felt his stomach flip, not in the way his constant mild stomach pains irked him. It was a good flip. If his blood still flowed, he would have felt his face warm. Sas smiled sheepishly, he fiddled with his hands in his lap.

“Patience!”

Isaac and Sas jumped apart. Patience had come back. She had her hands folded in front of her, and she had a soft smile.

“Hello friends, I have returned so that we may spend more time together.”

xxx

Masterlist

[rubydubydoo122]

In every universe Jason Peter Todd dies young. It’s a fate sealed across the multiverse. Maybe he could hope that there’s one universe where he doesn’t. aka, Jason, Dick, and Bruce go multiverse hopping, and are not having a fun time. (Ps, when I started writing this fic I hced Jason as Latino, but I don't really believe in that hc anymore, so just a heads up if you don't like that hc)

TRIGGER WARNING -> Child Death (it's Jason)

“Shit.” Dick squatted down right where he was and ran his fingers through his hair, “Fuck.” He ran his hands down his face, “Once is an accident, twice is a coincidence, three times is a pattern.”

Jason blinked. He was still picturing his lifeless eyes staring up into the sky. He was still picturing his frozen body curled into the corner of the dumpster. He was still feeling the way Bruce cradled his lifeless body. “Huh?”

Dick looked to Bruce for help, but something must’ve clicked, “You knew? Bruce, you knew and didn’t–”

“I didn’t want it to be true.” 

“Ah, yes. And the multiverse is just going to bow down to your will.” Dick spit back venomously.

“Obviously not. Dick, it was two times, I didn’t want to worry you two if I was wrong.”

“Since when have you ever cared about worrying us? At least if you’d’ve told us, we could’ve saved Jason!”

Jason decided that if Bruce and Dick were going to make a scene, he was going to take in their surroundings. Make sure someone like… Ultraman doesn’t show up. 

They were on the Wayne Enterprise rooftop… and was that… whispering? Jason stood up and let out a whistle, “Oi! Quit the bickering!” He signed ‘ Someone’s here’ ,  and continued talking “I swear, it’s like we were sent back ten years.” Keeping a hand on the kris in his pocket, Jason rounded the corner where he heard the whispers coming from.

There was someone lurking in the shadows of the HVAC unit. He almost didn’t notice them, but after years of fighting the bats and assassins, and bat-assassins, he knew what to look for. “I can see you.” 

The person lept from the shadows, running at him with a metal stick. A bo staff. It was also a kid, who was very obviously new with the weapon. Jason grabbed the stick, and yoinked it out of the kid’s hand before he could land a hit on him. “Hold it, kid. I’m–”

Suddenly a bundle of red, green, and yellow kicked him right in the Jaw, and punched him in the gut, “Get away or–” He could see the recognition and confusion flutter across Robin’s face, “Who are you?”

“It’s One bad night for ART.” Jason put his hand in the air.

Robin put his hands on his hips and tilted his head to the side, with a little smile “That’s not mine, that’s B’s.” 

“You’re really gonna make me sing it?” Why couldn’t he have chosen a poem or something. Actually, no. He’s been telling poems to Jason's seconds away from death. He should’ve chosen an emo phrase like Bruce. “ I've lived long enough to have learned; The closer you get to the fire, the more you get burned; But that won't happen to us; 'Cause it's always been a matter of trust” 

A soft smile spread across Robin’s face, “You sound just like Papi. Give me one minute to yell at this Cabron. ” he spun around to the kid. “ You are supposed to be back at the cave. Agent A is gonna be so mad at you.”

Now that the kid was in the light and not attacking him, Jason could get a much better look at him. He was slightly taller than Robin, but based on the baby fat on his face and the scolding, he was probably younger. He had an awful bowl cut, (which, wow, his parents must hate him for that,) and was wearing a domino and a black sweatshirt. There was a camera strung around his neck.“What Agent A doesn’t know won’t hurt him. Besides, he’s on vacation.”

Robin scoffed, “Agent A always knows. I bet his butler senses are sending out a beacon to give you a look as we speak.”

“Well, I’m sorry if you’re a shit liar, but I think I can get away with it.”The kid gave him an ‘I'm scheming’ grin that was eerily reminiscent of Tim.

Wait. Hold up, “Tim?”

“Apapapapa,” Tim held up a finger, “Codenames and it’s Crow.”

“No it’s not. We just call him Egg. Since he’s supposed to be in the nest.”

Oh, Jason is totally calling Tim and Damian Eggs when they get back to their timeline.

Tiny Tim groaned, “You’re not the boss of me.”

“Well, I’m older. So yeah, kinda.”

“I’m taller.”

Robin crossed his arms, “I’m sorry if you missed the part where that giant is me.” He jabbed his thumb over his shoulder, “So technically, I’m taller.”

Tim frowned and then looked to Dick, “Is alternate reality me taller than Jason?”

Dick winced apologetically, “Sorry, Timmy, you only reach 5’6”.”

Tim let out a long spew of curses and something about his winning argument.

Bruce came out of the shadows he was hiding in, “Language.”

Robin raised his eyebrows, “So all Bruce’s are the same across dimensions?”

Dick made a so-so motion, “Our Bruce is older and grumpier.”

“We’ll fix that.” He grinned and gave Tim a look that could only spell out trouble. “I’m gonna call our Batman. Then you’ll probably be given some light interrogation, but then we can go to the cave and have hot chocolate together!” 

Now that the kid mentioned it, Jason was really hungry. And tired. How many hours have they been at this cosmic adventure? Four? It would be well into the morning in their Gotham. 

Robin lifted a finger to his ear, “Batman, we have an Egg out of the Nest. I repeat, we have an Egg out of the Nest. Also we have an ART situation.” a pause, “calm down, they’re nice.” Another pause, “I am not too trusting. I just have a good judge of character. It’s a different version of Me, you, and Nightwing, but older and they said they had their own Egg, so really, how bad could they be?” Robin grinned, “Also, N looks like he’s in his protective big brother mode, so we’re safe with them. We’re on top of the Wayne Enterprise building.” The grin faded into a soft smile, “Yeah, yeah, me too, Old man. Take your time. Grapple safely. Don’t hurt your back” Robin brought his finger from the com, and looked to Bruce, “You ok, B-man? You look like you’re gonna hurl.” 

Bruce shook his head, “Nothing. It’s just, you can be too trusting of people you want to believe you can trust.”

Jason groaned, “Oh my– Bruce, it was literally one singular time. I told you we would talk about it later.” Preferably, it would be never, but Bruce is going to keep pushing it in his own Bruce way.

“Hey, Skunk-Hair Jason, Are you gonna give me back my bo-staff?”

Was Tim a little shit in every universe? Jason saw something flicker across Robin’s face at the comment though. That’s fair, his Tim called him skunk-hair often, but that was probably the first time Robin heard it. It’s gonna do wonders for his self esteem.

He heard the telltale sound of a grapple hooking behind him, “I think I’ll just give it to Daddy-bats.” He pressed the button to retract the staff, and tossed it over his shoulder. 

As expected Batman caught it, “Egglett, I thought we agreed, no more sneaking out.”

“But I didn’t sneak out, I walked out of the front door. Besides, this isn’t our biggest problem right now. Dick, you said there was a pattern? I’m assuming it’s related to the realities you’re being sent to.”

Dick glanced at Robin, “Yes, but…” He looked to Bruce for help.

Batman moved so they were all standing in a relative circle. Meaning he was in between Jason and Jason, “How about you start from the beginning, Chum.” It was his Bruce voice, not his Batman voice. 

So Dick told him. How they’d gotten hit by the interdimensional ray, how they were in the warehouse, how they thought they were sent to the past, at first, how Jason had died. 

He saw the way Robin moved a step closer to Batman. He noticed how Batman shifted his weight closer to Robin.

Dick then moved on to tell them about the Alley. About the sudden confusion, because they were definitely in Gotham, just not their Gotham. He told them about the frozen kid in the corner. Jason.

At that, Robin seemed to freeze. Definitely thinking about the Man who had saved them. Weighing the pros and cons of life and innocence. Death and sins. Though, Tim seemed to pick up the pattern, and grabbed Robin’s hand.

And finally, Dick told them about them walking back from the library. And a 13 year old Jay getting hit by a car.

“So…you think I’m gonna die.” Robin didn’t look all that scared, but Jason knew himself. It was in the way he crossed his arms, and looked at Dick defiantly. It was in the way he was in fight mode. Then like an omen, the bat signal lit up. If it’s the Joker, Jason is going to scream. 

Batman placed a hand on Robin’s shoulder. The one that was farther from him, so it was more of a half-hug. “Do you think it could be anything else? Maybe a smaller detail you missed?”

They all turned to Bruce, but Bruce just shook his head. 

Batman nodded slowly, “Alright, we’re all going back to the cave. I’m assuming your suits are in the duffle, so you two,” He pointed to Dick and Bruce, “Can suit up. The kids can be on house arrest. Once we deal with that,” Batman pointed at the bat signal, “we can work a way to get you three home.” 

There were protests from Robin and Tim, but Bruce fixed them with a batglare™ which shut them up immediately. 

Jason raised his hand, “What’ll I be doing?”

Batman blinked at him, “You’ll… be at the manor.”

The kids will be on house arrest , He thinks Jason’s a kid then. “Oh. ok.” It’s ok. He’d make good use of this.

The drive to the cave sucked. Mainly because the Bruces got front seat privileges, and the four of them had to squish together in the back.  Jason did solve the problem by propping his knees up against the passenger seat and making sure to kick it every once in a while to annoy Bruce. Dick, who was sitting in the middle, used the newfound space to stretch out his legs, and give Robin and Tim more room. 

Robin had wrapped his cape around himself, like he was a burrito. Jason forgot he used to do that. It was mainly because the Robin suit had too much leg. Even if he was wearing tights under longer shorts. It was less revealing than Dick’s version of the suit, but still mildly uncomfortable at times.

Tim was squished in between Dick and Robin, but he didn’t seem to mind. In fact, he shifted so that his head was resting on Robin’s shoulder. Robin froze slightly at the touch, but then lowered his cheek to rest on the top of Tim’s head.

God, is this how he and Tim would’ve been if Jason hadn’t died? The bickering on the roof, but moments where you could tell they really cared about each other. And yeah, sure, Jason and Tim definitely bickered now, but sometimes, with everyone, he felt like he was making his way through glass that had shattered on the floor.

Dick discreetly took a picture of the two, which was a bad idea, because it would just hurt more in the long run. When they had to go home and this reality would never be theirs. When Dick realized that the brother he wanted would never be Jason, because the Jason he wanted was long dead.

As soon as they got to the cave, Bruce and Dick made a beeline to the stalls to change. And all Jason could think about was how much the cave had changed since his time as Robin.

It was a lot emptier. The area for the training mats were smaller, Tim’s collection of bo-staffs was down to two, and Damian’s sword and knife collection wasn’t even there. Half of the work benches were gone, and so were half of the vehicles they now used. 

Most importantly, the two cases that held the suits of two dead Robins weren't there. It was just… an empty space. 

Batman walked up to him, and grunted, “Jay was wrong, I’m still taller than you.”

Jason blinked for a minute, because Batman? Making jokes? “Your ears don’t count.”

Batman pulled down the cowl, and did the thing where you measure with your hand. Except he went up a bit, so that his hand barely brushed his curls, “Yup, still taller.”

It hurt. It was weird looking at a Bruce who was younger. The one Jason wished to come back to since he crawled out of his grave, only to find the Bruce he was looking for had died too. Maybe that’s the reason why he and Bruce were never on the same page anymore. They were looking for someone in each other who only existed in their memories. Jason and Bruce would never be the same people they were before that day in Ethiopia. 

He glanced over to where Jay was helping Tim take off his domino without getting the glue dissolver in his eyes. “I’m not that kid, ya know.”

Bruce gave him a rueful smile, “I can tell, but you’re still my kid. Alternate reality or not.” 

It was as if he had grabbed Jason's heart with both hands and started to squeeze it until it would eventually explode. The only reason Bruce could say that was because he didn’t know half the things Jason had done. He didn’t know anything about him at all. 

Bruce looked like he was about to say something else, but the security alarms started going off, immediately displaying on the Batcomputer.

Dick and Bruce(the older one) burst out of the stalls.

There were Joker goons– why did it have to be the Joker?– flooding onto the lawn, jumping over the fence, and heading straight to the manor. So they were after Bruce Wayne, not Batman.

Except it was the Joker. And something, something Jay dying. And something, something the Joker murdered Jason. Things are not really looking good. 

Bruce(the younger one) pulled up his cowl, and looked at Jay and Tim, “Stay here.” He then made eye contact with Jason, with a look that clearly said ‘ look after them’ , then looked to Bruce(the older one), and to Dick, “Lets go.”

And the three of them glided up the stairs.

They watched the Batmans and Nightwing split up and make their way through the manor, on the Batcomputer. He watched as they silently took the goons out one by one. He watched as the Joker waltzed right into the manor. Damn, if Alfred was here, he would have shot that psychotic lunatic down already. 

Jason saw a little shadow dart past the Study. Except… It was too small for Bruce or Dick, but Robin was sitting right next to him, looking at the screen intently, hand hovering to warn them if needed. And the spot where Tim was standing was empty. “Tim?”

If they weren’t in the situation they were currently in, it would’ve been comical how wide Robin’s eyes got. Then his jaw clenched, “Why in the world would he sneak off now of all times?”

“Tim’s just a little shit across universes.” Jason paused, because if some rando started talking like that about Tim, he would probably give them a nice slap across the face, “He’s doing that thing where he comes up with a plan and forgets not everyone is on the same brainwave as him.”

Robin groaned, and reached over to click on something, “Tim, care to share what you’re doing with the class?”

There was a lengthy pause, but they could see Tim on the camera, crouched down behind a decorative couch in the fancy living room, “Arming the traps.”

Robin crossed his arms and started tapping his foot, “You really think that two Batmans and a Nightwing can’t take down the Joker?”

“I just want to help.”

“You can’t–”

Jason placed an arm on Robin’s shoulder, “How ‘bout this Tim, We switch places and you tell me how to arm the traps from the cave?” 

“But–”

“I’m only gonna ask once. I’m coming up there to get you either way.” Jason moved to grab his helmet from the duffle bag and a couple of shurikens from the rack.

“...fine. I– Eep!”

Jason turned his head to the screen so fast, he was sure he’d get whiplash. There on screen was the Joker holding Tim by the collar.

A laugh came through the coms, “I think it’s a bit past your bedtime. Don’t worry, Uncle J will tell you a bedtime story…”

Jason was already halfway up the stairs, “Stay here, Robin. Tell Batman.” Robin nodded, and Jason practically sprinted across the manor to get to Tim.

He could practically hear Bruce yelling at him in his brain about attacking the Joker without a plan, but here’s the thing— Jason genuinely did not care. He was going to make sure what happened to him would not happen to this baby version of his little brother. The Joker connives to get a rise out of Batman. It’s why he terrorizes the city. It’s why his exploits get worse and worse. It’s why he hurt Babs and killed Jason. And the Joker has only gotten worse as time went on.

Jason reached the living room and was about to fling a shuriken at the Joker’s arm to make him drop Tim, but he suddenly moved to put Tim in a headlock, with a gun to his head. 

It was eerily reminiscent of the way Jason had held the Joker during that confrontation. With Him, Bruce, and the Joker.

The Joker let out a laugh that grated against his ears like nails on a chalkboard, “And who might you be? For a second there I thought you were one of mine.” The Joker tilted his head, “Though, maybe you are… did you raid Daddy’s wardrobe? I do say, you look nice, but I think I wore it better.”

Jason tsked in a way that would make Damian proud, “With your pasty looking face? No chance. Let the kid go.” 

The Joker pouted, “But the show hasn’t even started! We don’t even have a full house yet. Batsy’s going to have to make a tough choice, huh?”

There was a crackle of electricity near the other entrance to the living room, “Let him go.” Dick’s voice was dangerously low.

“Well if it isn’t the first boy blunder. My, my, you’ve grown up quite a bit. And a new costume change I see? A shame, I liked the other one better. Though I do suppose this one leaves more to the imagination.”

Jason was going to strangle the clown, and then bash his face in, and then grab his gun and shoot him multiple times, and then–

The Joker brought the gun closer to Tim’s head, “Apapa, Big Red. Wouldn’t want Timmy’s big brains painting the carpet. The dry cleaning would be just terrible.” started cackling like he had just said the funniest joke ever.

He could see the panic flash on Tim’s face for a second, before he closed his eyes and took a slow breath, and painted over the fear with apathy. It was something his Tim could do much faster, but it was still… unnerving to watch a kid barely older than 10 do. Tim rolled his eyes, “You know for someone named the Joker, you’re not very funny. I’ve seen Batman laugh at Robin loads of times. He’s known you for what, fifteen years? Yet you still haven’t gotten a laugh out of him.”

The Joker hit Tim’s temple with the gun “Shut it, brat.” He turned his gaze onto Dick, “Say, Nightwing, what would ya do if I… say, killed the little b–haha! The kid. What would you do if I killed him? Would you punch me hard? Maybe if I fanned the fire, would the punches keep coming? Would they? Until I could no longer see straight? Until I could no longer breathe.” the Joker giggled “And only my Dark Knight in shining armor– a true love's kiss from Batsy could bring me back.” The Joker, since he got out all he needed to say, let out a full body laugh.

Dick’s jaw clenched so hard, Jason would’ve thought he was about to break a tooth. 

And Tim had the biggest ‘what in the ever loving fuck?’ expression on his face, “Mr. Joker sir, could you put me down? I think you’re a bit too delusional if you think you’re even close to being in Batman’s league.”

“Tim–” Dick was about to warn him to probably take the sass down three notches when the Joker started laughing again. Both Batmen stood at the same entrance as Dick, though their 

“Batsy! There’s two of you! This is wonderful!” He frowned, and looked directly at Jason, “Hm… I wonder where the little birdie is? Hehehe, Oh well, we can just start without him. Good thing too, my hands are getting sweaty. Who knows, my finger might just slip…” The Joker curled the finger that was on the trigger, but Jason knew he wasn’t going to pull it. Not yet. It wasn’t dramatic enough yet. Batman subtly shifted closer to Jason. 

Figures. Of course he would make sure that he could get in between the Joker and Jason if need be. Though, as much as it pains him, he wasn’t going to try to kill this one. Not because the Joker deserved to be spared or because Bruce told him to stop killing. No. It was because he knew Robin was watching through the cameras, and he didn’t want that version of himself to see the person he had become.

“Such an old house. I wonder if there are any ghosts here.” The Joker looked at Jason and shivered, but it was for the bit, because he gave him a grin that made his blood run cold, “Haha! Definitely. Though… I can feel something in the air. Like it’s making room for another ghost to join.” The Joker laughed, “Now, I based this off of a dream I had once. How did it go again? Right, I didn’t have an extra gun on hand, but it’s ok! Hehe, you won’t need it anyways.” He readjusted his grip on Tim and gave Jason a wink, “ You want to stop me, you’re going to have to kill me. All you’ve got is a head-shot. I’m going to blow his addled, deranged brains out, and if you want to stop it– Hahaa! You’re going to have to shoot me, Hehehee! right in my face.” The uncontrollable laughter kept getting louder and louder– How did he know ? They were in a completely different reality , How did he know ? “Of course, you don’t have a gun, so maybe a batarang would do. Right to the neck.” The Joker looked back to Jason, his head tilting as his grin grew impossibly bigger, “This is turning out so much better than I thought. I’ll give you to the count of three. One… Two…Thr–”

“ No!” Except it didn’t come from Batman, or Batman, or Dick. It came from Jason. But It didn’t come from Jason. It came from Robin .

A batarang hit the elbow that was holding Tim, sending him to the floor just as a shot rang out. Except the bullet didn’t clatter to the floor or into the wall, there was the sound of metal piercing through skin. But it didn’t hit Tim. Because the barrel wasn’t facing where Tim had been

It was facing Jay.  

Blood was gushing from the kid’s neck as cackles rang throughout the Manor.

“You know that’s how you wanted that night to end, Red. You aren’t supposed to be here, and you know it. Not here, not anywhere! Haha, you’re supposed to be– ACK!” 

Jason couldn’t tell if there was electricity crackling, or if it was just the static in his ears. He couldn’t tell if there was the sound of skin meeting skin, or if it was just the pounding of his heart. 

All he knew was that he took off his helmet as he bent down to put pressure on the bleeding. The bullet went through the side of his neck. Almost exactly where Jason had his scar from the batarang. Except the wound was deeper and he was losing more blood. And Jay was smaller.

Tim crawled up to them, “J-Jason…?”

Even through the domino mask, Jason could feel the demanding gaze from Jay, “No. Tim. ‘s not… y’r fault.”

“But, if-if I hadn’t left, then- then the Joker, he wouldn’t’ve–”

“Not. Your. Fault.” Jay grabbed Tim’s hand, “Don’t… die. Not f’r a… long time. Live.”

“You– You’re the one who’s…You’re actively bleeding out. Right now.”

“No. Batman… d’sn’t need…  R’bin. Br’ce…Bruce needs…. Someone’a… tell ‘im he’s not… ‘n dark. Bruce. Needs. Us.” Jay brought a weak hand from his heart to Tim’s, “Hope.” Jay looked to Jason, and gave him a tired smile, “‘s the thin’... w’th… feathers.”

Jason tried his best to return the smile, “ ”Hope” is the thing with feathers - That perches in the soul - And sings the tune without the words - And never stops - at all -” Jay gave a content breath out. He closed his eyes to just… listen. “ And sweetest - in the Gale - is heard - And sore must be the storm - That could abash the little Bird- That kept so many warm -” with each stanza, Jay’s pulse got slower and slower. “I’ve heard it in the chillest land - And on the strangest Sea - Yet - never - in Extremity, It asked a crumb - of me.”

Jay took one breath in, and he could see Tim squeeze his hand tighter. And as he let his final breath out, there was a soft, “ Te Amo.” that escaped Jay’s lips.

“Jason?” There were tears pooling in Tim’s eyes, “Jason, please . Say sike right now, this isn’t funny.” 

Jason leaned back and started to take off his bloodstained gloves, “Tim–”

“I-I promise I won’t sneak out to take pictures anymore. I promise I won’t sneak coffee, and I- I won’t lie to Alfred. I won’t make fun of your height anymore, just please – Jason , I’m sorry. I’m sorry. Come back.” 

“Tim…”

He looked up at Jason all bleary eyed, “Why won’t he say sike? He’s Robin , he- he– he can’t be gone.”

Jason spread his arms, and Tim immediately dove into his chest and started sobbing, “He- He’s never… He’s never going to be… big like you.”

Jason held onto Tim, “ Pajarito…” He rubbed small circles into Tim’s back as he sobbed harder. 

He wanted to stay. He didn’t want to leave Tim all alone just like that. He didn’t want Tim to lose one Jason just to lose another.

But the room turned white, and they were gone.

[d011zk1ll]

I have very strong opinions on the Heros season 6 designs and I'm not afraid to share them.

Let me start this off by saying, I do understand that It will look better in motion!! I am extremely hopeful this is the case and I don't necessarily distrust that this is the case, and actively wish it to be. I've seen the clips so far and they're gorgeous (Alya's bob omg <3333) so i do hope it looks better in the actual show. I love this show, a lot. Like a lot a lot, and this isn't any form of hate just my opinions!!

Okay, lets go left to right with what we've seen so far hero wise.

Carapace!!

You know what? I don't hate it. He looks a younger than before but then again, they're only 14/15 so hey! I like how it didn't change that much, and i like the additions. They kept the hood and googles, the pattern is similar and all together they didn't change him much. They could have done more, but with his shell this will look pretty nice! And i love the way part of his suit juts out for texture difference!! 2. Ladybug

It's not that bad. I do think the spandex is still weird, and wish she had some cool jacket and it doesn't seem like she has actual shoes (some combat boots would be FIRE) but i like the black. It's different but not overwhelmingly so and her hair being a bit longer reminds me of the anime PV ladybug (who was still quite awesome). Her iconic ribbons and her gloves reign supreme. I wish she could have some extra layers or cool textures but compared to the following two she isn't all around that bad.

3. Chat noir

Wow. I know he's a twink but wtf guys. That's not even his face shape he looks so strange. His hair looks tamer which i hate so much because he's supposed to be wild and scraggly. AND THEY KEPT THAT GOD DAMN BELL. It's pretty much the same, but TWINKIER??? And i'm a twink, i love the twink vibes but they fucked him up SO bad its painful oh my god. Why. Please. I do not like Chat's design his face shape is really putting me off. :((( BUT it will probably grow on me. I just hope they don't fuck up felix :(((

4. Rena rouge

Look. I love her. She's gorgeous. But. Wow. I cannot belive they made her skinny. as a chubby person, i want her to be like, back to how she was as ALYA in season 1-5. I'm so upset they didn't keep her body shape it's so upsetting. I hope they don't do anything like this to Mylene. Other than that, i love her. Her ears are so cool, pointy and almost look like a bow. Her hair looks gorgeous, stunning, beautiful. It's so cool. I love how they kept her suit similar because i've always adored her suit. I like the white palms and her flute looks a lot nicer now. The only qualm i have with her really is how they made her skinny.

I had to add this in there, just because i love it so much, Look at her hair oh my god. Short hair Alya is something I never knew i needed and they kept her clothes similar <33333 (I adore her outfit as is) gosh i cant wait to see her.

[ladykissingfish]

*Chiyo walking into Sasori’s room*

Chiyo: Boy. Clean this room up, and then clean yourself up. We’re having visitors today.

Sasori, working on a puppet: “We”? You told me that the Tsuchikage of Iwagakure was coming to see you for medical advice. What does that have to do with me?

Chiyo: *sighs* None of your sass today, child. He’s bringing one of his students with him, for you to play with. He’s —

Sasori, disgustedly: Play?? What am I, an infant? I'm eleven years old, I’m too old to play. I’d rather keep on with my —

Chiyo: *slams her hand down on Sasori’s desk* You either cooperate with me or I’m lighting a fire and burning all of this to the ground. The choice is yours.

Sasori:

*later that afternoon*

Onoki: *bowing his head* Chiyo-san. It’s a pleasure to see you again. We thank you for allowing us into your home. *gestures to the boy beside him* This is my student Deidara. Deidara, this is Chiyo-sama and her grandson, Sasori.

Chiyo: Well aren’t you a handsome young man? Sasori, take Deidara to your room and entertain him while the Tsuchikage and I talk.

Sasori: Do I have —

Chiyo: *elbows Sasori sharply*

Sasori, sighing, putting on a fake smile: Come on, Deidara-chan! Let’s go play in my room!

*the two go into Sasori’s room and Deidara’s eyes widen at all the puppets*

Deidara: Wow … did you make all these??

Sasori: Yes.

Deidara: That’s really impressive!

Sasori: Yes, I know. *goes to sit at his desk and continues working on the puppet from the morning*

Deidara: … so I take it you don’t have a lot of friends, huh? Because if you did you’d know that you don’t just ignore a guest, hm.

Sasori: I’m not ignoring you. I’m responding to you when you talk, aren’t I? I’m simply focusing the brunt of my attention on my art.

Deidara: Art?! This isn’t art; you’re just playing with dolls, like a girl!

Sasori: *turns to face Deidara* You’re mistaken. I’m creating things of beauty and perfection, pieces that will last for an eternity. That’s art.

Deidara: No, it’s not, hm. *pulls a small piece of clay from his pocket and molds it into a butterfly* Watch … *he has it float around the room, and suddenly explodes it in a small shower* That. THAT is art. A burst of fire and sparks. Art is an —

Sasori: *laughs* Are you crazy?! How is that art?? You’re just making a mess and a lot of unnecessary noise! Tsk, stupid brat!

Deidara: Don’t you call me a brat! Onoki-san said you’re only like two years older than me!

Sasori: But I’m obviously a ton smarter! And you said that “playing with dolls” makes me a girl?! You LOOK like a girl! With your stupid long blonde hair and stupid long eyelashes! And are you wearing nail polish?? God, you may as well be in a dress!

Deidara: Oh, yeah?! Well —

*later, as Onoki and Deidara are walking home* 

Onoki: Well, after that treatment, I feel much better. And what about you, child? Did you enjoy your time with young Sasori?

Deidara: That boy is rude, and annoying, and he’s a weirdo, and he has NO idea what art is, and one day he’ll probably grow up and turn the whole world into those creepy puppets of his!

Onoki, startled: O-oh? I had no idea he was so —

Deidara, dreamily: We’re coming back next week, right? I can’t wait to see him again ~

Onoki:

*meanwhile, back in Suna*

Chiyo: … Sasori? What are you doing?

Sasori, standing at the stove: Practicing. Deidara said that the best sweet is dango, I say it’s sweet buns. I’m going to make him the best sweet buns of his life the next time he comes to visit. T-to prove him wrong, of course.

Chiyo:

@sasodeiweek

[nonobadcat]

For @oklolnoty

With special thanks to @krystalwithakay for writing an entire, working Javascript program just to make a joke in a fanfiction. May 2D murderers ever throw themselves at your illustrious feet.

Down the Rabbit Hole - Five Chapters - 20k words - Yandere Shigaraki Tomura x Rabbit Quirk Female Reader

Chapter Navigation: 1|2|3|4|5 🐇 Ao3 Mirror

Rating: 18+ readers only - Minors DNI

Final Chapter : Accessory - 6.1k words

TW: Noncon, yandere with kidnapping, canon typical threats of violence (reader directed), canon typical death (nonreader directed), oral (receive), PnV (doggie), breeding, and expensive designer clothing everywhere.

“Honey-chan! Come here! Come here!”

From the far side of the bar, Nyanko waved you over. Pochi and Nyanko sat scattered between a group of three middle-aged men and one woman. The short, squat one on the right had to be the Kiba, if the amorous attention he lavished on Pochi was anything to go by. You knew he’d been the one to introduce Oshida to the club, but the rest of the party didn’t look much like heroes or marketing managers. Beside Kiba, a tall, chiseled man with rumpled salt and pepper hair wore hideous seafoam green scrubs. Next to him, a thick necked work-out-aholic still had his hospital badge on his pocket clip. The only woman was a few years older than Mama-san with a small, oval face, Cupid’s bow lips and glossy chestnut hair. While she easily could have passed for a former hostess, the long, white lab coat draped over her seat revealed her real profession.

You pushed away an exhausted frown and very bitter “I haven’t even put down my bag, ho!” in favor of a cheery grin and bouncy step. Sliding onto the couch next to them, you clicked your tongue.

“Meh, what’s up, Docs?”

Green scrubs belted out a hearty laugh. “You were right, Nyanko-chan, she is very witty.”

Nyanko scratched the air. “Remember your paw-mise, Yamamoto-sensei. You’re nya-t allowed to fall for anyone but me-ow-kay?

“O-okay,” he murmured, pushing up his glasses.

Nyanko giggled.

“Honey Bunny, this is Kiba-san from the Buster Hero Agency,” Pochi explained, gesturing to each guest in order. “Yamamoto-sensei, Hora-san and Sawa-sensei all work in the Pediatric Trauma Unit at Metropolitan Hospital. Hora-san is the director. Yamamoto-sensei and Sawa-sensei are his top surgeons.”

“Oh wow! How amazing!” you gushed. “So when kids get injured in a villain attack, you’re the people that save them?”

“Yes. They’re the real heroes,” Kiba proclaimed proudly, sloshing his Old Fashioned.

“We’re negotiating a collaboration with the Buster agency,” Hora explained. “We’re going to feature them in our literature and they’ll be doing daily hospital appearances for the kids.”

“Now, now—” Kiba wagged his finger “—I never promised daily visits. Our heroes are very busy and I need to be respectful of their time.”

Hora slapped him on the back with a loud laugh. “If you can still say that, I need to buy you another drink, my friend.”

“Careful what you offer.” Pochi’s fanged grin pricked her rosy lips as she draped herself around her prey’s arm. “My Kiba can really hold his liquor. You better watch yourself, Hora-san.”

Kiba roared with laughter. “You tell them Pochi-chan!”

You giggled into your palm to hide the snide smirk. Billed for her mature sensuality and elegance, Pochi was Animal Instinct's number one Hostess for a reason. Notorious for her ability to smooth over even the most heated contract negotiations with her wit and grace, her clients included some of the largest corporate big wigs in the city. Drinking with her would do to your budget what trying to put out a fire with gasoline would, but if you could bankroll her tastes, her companionship paid literal dividends. 

The only question was, which party suggested the hostess club for negotiations?

You studied the faces of each guest in turn. Kiba, being the regular, seemed like the likely candidate, but Hora’s comment about the drinks implied he was footing the bill. Nyanko’s “here, kitty, kitty” act left Yamamoto too spellbound. While he would probably be back again, this was clearly his first run in with her cattitude. When your eyes rolled to the last person at the table, you caught a calculating grin on a botoxed smile. 

Like a boss, Sawa-sensei. Like a boss.

“Oh! I almost forgot!” Nyanko gasped. “Honey-chan, show Sawa-sensei your new purse, paw-eeze?”

Sawa-sensei’s gaze drifted to the crook of your elbow where the bag hung like the white elephant in the room. You hoisted it up, setting it on the table for her inspection. Tiny palladium feet clinked on the glass top.

“Well now,” she turned it this way and that. “I think I still like the Retoupe better than the Sellier, but the size looks perfect and that color is so...”

“It goes with everything, right?” Nyanko agreed.

Sawa-sensei nodded. “Everybody gushes over the bubblegum pink but I think the Etain/Etoupe color lines are the perfect neutral.” She passed the bag back to you. “Very classic. Do you shop at Hermés often?”

“Oh! No, no!” you explained, with a cheery laugh. “A client bought it for me a few days ago.”

Sawa raised a painted brow. “She must be well connected.” 

“He,” Nyanko corrected. “His son comes in to learn how to talk to women. Of all of us, Honey-chan was the first to really bring him out of his shell.”

You cringed, glancing at Kiba. Hopefully that little comment didn’t make it back to Oshida. Logically, the man had to know you had other clients, but when it came to you, he could be more territorial than a bull elephant seal. Still, it made for good tips and a girl had to eat.

Thumbing her chin, she studied your purse like a general analyzing enemy troop movements. “Your sponsor seems to understand women well and have exquisite taste.” She winked at you. “Lucky girl.”

“Huh.” Hora inspected the bag. “That looks like a nice laptop bag. Maybe I should get one for my wife.”

“I’m sure she’d like it,” Sawa replied coolly, sipping her martini. “That’s the 35 cm. They start at about 2 million yen.”  

His face paled. 

“Of course, that doesn’t include the money you have to spend to even be offered the chance to buy,” she continued. “Hermés boutiques only get a limited delivery twice a year and only their top clients are considered. I think I owned fifteen of their scarves, two pairs of shoes, and the entire collection of their perfumes before I got the option. Even then, it was mostly because my mother buys their saddles for her Gypsy Vanners.”

WHAT THE HECK HIGH SPEC FAMILY DID THIS WOMAN COME FROM?!

“Their scarves are so lovely,” Pochi cooed. “Kiba got me the Grise Nacré colorway of Chorus Stellarum last week. It’s a must have for any pastel goth.”

“How much did that set you back?” Hora asked.

Kiba coughed into his glass. “56,000.”

“He’s a doll, right?” Pochi gushed, patting him on the cheek.

Considering Pochi had to talk him out of buying his wife an unsolicited vacuum cleaner for her birthday, you really wondered about that. 

“Maybe a scarf then,” Hora agreed, scratching the back of his neck. 

“Oh,” Pochi turned to Kiba. “What about little scarves or bandanas as favors for the kids? They wouldn’t be too expensive to print if you outsource and they’d look like little capes! Super on brand, right?”

“Pochi-chan! You’re a genius!” 

Her tail wagged so hard the seat swayed. “Oh, Kiba-san. Stop it! ”

Sawa-sensei smirked at the exchange and elbowed Hora. He nodded at her before turning to you. “Could you get us some champagne, Honey-chan?”

With a sparkling grin and an under the table fist pump, you replied: “Of course!”

“Pochi-sama!” Nyanko whined, her flushed face buried in the other Hostess’s arm. “I bow before you and beg for your continued protection.”

You clapped your hands together like a woman in prayer. “High holy Pochi-sama, Goddess of the Golden Tip. We offer you our eternal devotion.”

Pochi twirled her hair and loosed a cartoon villainess’s laugh. “Fear not, my darlings. True believers shall always receive my blessing.”

“We are unworthy,” the two of you repeated in synchrony.

“Thank you, thank yo—oooop!

Nyanko’s drunken cackles rang into the night as Pochi tripped into the back alley. “So graceful!”

“Elegance in her every step,” you agreed.

“Silence, mortals,” Pochi commanded, steadying herself on the dumpster. She thumbed her chest. “I have the skills that pay the -hic- bills.”

You giggled.

“Hey, Honey-chan?”

“Hmmm?”

Nyanko pointed to your empty arms. “Forgetting something?”

You slapped your forehead. “Oh. Duh. It’s still on the table.” Black heels wedged themselves into the self-locking fire door before it snapped shut. “Last train leaves soon. You guys go ahead without me.”

“You sure?”

Pochi swallowed, clapping a hand over her mouth.

“I’m fine!” you insisted, shooing them off. “Get her holiness back to the temple before she has to worship the porcelain god.”

“Whoops! No worries, Pochi-sama! I got your back!” Nyanko replied, wiping out a scrunchie. She scooped up Pochi’s dangling ears and tied them in a bow. Then, your friend turned back to you. “Careful going home with all that cash, kay, bunny girl?”

You nodded. “Thanks, Nyanko. You’re a queen.”

She purred before wrapping Pochi’s arm over one shoulder. Swaying together, they stumbled out onto the main drag before making a right towards the station.

Finding the bag took no time at all. You checked your wallet, only to see a fat stack of untouched 5000 yen notes. Basking in the glory of financial security, you whistled the item get theme from Legend of Zelda before strutting back to the door. The 1812 Overture blared from Mama-san’s office, drowning out the world. You bowed to her. Waving like an empress greeting the great unwashed, she returned to tallying the daily total.

Snickering, you ducked out the exit. 

When the fire door clanged shut, your hackles stood on end. The smell of sweat and woody citrus wafted on the breeze. A tall silhouette blocked the entrance to the alley. Panting like a dog, Oshida, clad in his spandex leotard, leaned against the brickwork. Dark shadows from his furrowed brow turned his brown eyes a bottomless jet black.

“O-Oshida-san?” you stammered, taking one step back. “What are you doing here?!”

“Nice bag.” He stalked down the alleyway, his hard stare never leaving the offending object. “Some other guy bought that for you, huh?”

You swallowed, unsure what to say to the hard bite in his tone.

He drew up in front of you, rolling his broad shoulders back to accentuate his full height. Wordlessly, he snatched up your wrist and inspected the leather craftsmanship. “Grey?” he scoffed. “How generic. That moron doesn’t know you at all does he?”

Out of seemingly nowhere, he produced a small, black leather box with a push button latch. Lowering himself to one knee, he snapped open the lid. A gaudy round-cut diamond, solitaire set in a rose gold band with pink sapphire trimmings, stared up at you like the eye of some great beast. Even in the dim, orange glow of hazy streetlamps, all three carats sparkled with near flawless clarity.

“Baby pink suits my baby girl much better then some ugly grey purse,” he cooed, slipping the ring onto your left hand.

Frozen in shock, you gapped at the garish, glittering stones.

Oh…

Oh no.

Oh no no no no no no no no no no no no!

“So… will you tell me your name now?”

Rigid tension shook your entire body. Sharp nails curled into tightly balled fists. “Oshida-san…”

He cupped your hand, stroking his thumb up and down yours. “Call me Hideki,” he purred.

Your head snapped up, wide eyes bulging. “Oshida-san, this is very sudden.”

He laughed. “Well, when Kiba told me everything that happened, I figured there was no time like the present.”

Heavy stones left the loose band sagging on your finger. Your heart sank along with it. Alarm bells blared as every part of your brain scrambled for an excuse that wouldn’t cost you a meal ticket. They clawed their way through pliant pacifications, tossing out line after line.

“But marrying a hostess would be terrible for your reputation. What would the press say?”

“Kiba will handle it.” A paparazzi worthy smile twinkled at you. “He’s great at his job.”

Screaming internally, you toed the ground and looked away. “Your parents would never approve. I don’t want to be the person who comes between a man and his family.”

He squeezed your hand. “Once they see how sweet you are, they’ll fall as deeply in love with you as I have.”

“I-I’m no good at anything housey though! I burn everything I cook, I always mix up the white and the colors, and I’m awful at cleaning!” You sniffled, pretending to cry into your hands. “You’d be so ashamed of a wife like me.”

“So I’ll hire a maid and a chef.” He chuckled, patting your hand. “Don’t worry your pretty little head over it, Princess. There are all kinds of wifely duties you can do for me.”

Oh my gosh. You were going to barf.

“Can you just not, you chauvinistic troglodyte?”

“What?”

Um... Girl. You just said the quiet part out loud.

You blinked. “What?”

Oshida blankly stared at you. “What did you just call me?”

Welp… guess the bunny was out of the burrow now. Better just roll with it.

Yanking off the ring, you ripped open his hand and dropped it into his palm. “I have precious little interest in marrying a callow narcissist who thinks I can be bought by the highest bidder, so you should march yourself on over to the first fangirl with a nice rack and toss your baggage her way.”

He stared at you. “Huh?”

“Are you for real?!” You threw your hands into the air. “No, you boorish sac of sexual harassment!” A manicured finger stabbed at the end of the alleyway. “I’m not the brainless bunny bimbo you think I am, so take a hint and take a hike!”

Slowly, the well rusted gears in Oshida-san’s head began to grind through your words. Head low, he rose to his feet and hovered in silence like a spandex coated scarecrow. As the blood in your ears slipped from a violent roar to a muted rumble, the man before you lifted his chin. Dark, bottomless eyes and a hard snarl were your only warning. Thick fingers clamped down on your wrist with bruising force.

“I ASKED YOU WHAT YOU JUST CALLED ME YOU LITTLE SLUT!” he roared.

A sallow hand shot out, grabbing Oshida's head with four fingers.

“Come on now, it’s not her fault that you can’t take a hint,” a grating voice rasped in your ear.

“W-wait!” Oshida’s face turned snow white. “Aren’t you—?”

Croaking laughter filled the alley. “I mean seriously, she had to spam the Clue-by-Four just to get it through your thick skull.” Tomura’s eerie smile seemed to glow in the dark. “Tell me hero, how do you live with yourself when you’re that stupid?”

Your heart stopped as his pointer pressed against Oshida’s cheek. Crumbling grey ash scattered in the breeze.

Tomura sneered. “Guess you don’t have to now.”

Shaking hands clutched your face. “T-Tomura, what have you done?” you whispered.

“Rekt the n00b?”

“You just killed a hero, Tomura!” you yelled. “What the heck were you thinking?!”

Cocking his head, he stared at you. “Why are you upset? Do I need to save scum or something?”

“You can’t save scum IRL!”

Tomura scratched his neck. “Reality is lame.”

You crumpled to the ground. Terrified words tumbled from your lips. “Now I’m out a client and an accessory to murder!”

“So… I picked the wrong option?”

You glared up at him with bloodshot, watery eyes. “I’m a pro-hostess! Handling angry drunks and sexual harassment is my rice and miso!” you snarled. 

Tomura puzzled over your words, weighing your complaints carefully. After a few, slow blinks he smacked his fist into his palm. “Oh. You think I was trying to be heroic like that bad choice in your game, don’t you?”

“Yeah, good on you for remembering now.” You moaned, burying your face in your hands. “Screwed! I'm so screwed!”

A firm, four fingered grip dragged you to your feet. You fell flat against a lean chest.

“Come on then, let’s go,” he stated, tugging you toward the end of the alley.

“Oh no. No. Absolutely not! I’m not a princess and I don’t need to be saved!” you insisted, pulling hard against his hold. “My fluffy butt is gonna stay right here, remain silent, and Google a good defense attorney.”

A cold chuckle set your hair on end. You looked up, only to see red eyes bulging out of his skull. Primordial terror sent your heart flailing against your ribs.

“You don’t understand, do you?”

A hard arm caught you in the stomach. You gasped. The world spun. Peeling lips curled in delight as Tomura swept you over his boney shoulder. 

“I’m no hero,” he rasped. “I’m the villain and I just didn’t want some moron touching what’s mine.”

You thrashed against him, hammering his black hoodie with your fists. “TOMURA! PUT ME DOWN!”

Cold fingers dug into your bare, inner thigh. “I don’t have an amputee fetish but I wouldn’t find you less attractive without your legs.”

You froze solid.

“Smart move.” The hold on your thigh receded. He reached into his hoodie pocket and extracted his phone. “By the way, settle a bet.” Painfully bright blue light spilled into the dark alley as he swiped through the contact list. “I know you were lying about the lemon sours and champagne. Tell me your real favorite.”

Your eyes darted this way and that looking for a weapon. There was nothing within reach. Looks like you’d only survive by your wits alone which, given being witty put you in this position, didn’t seem all that promising. 

“S-sake bomb,” you stammered out.

“What are you, a salaryman or something?” he teased.

Your face burned hot. “Shut up, Orange Cassis!”

He lifted the microphone to smirking lips. “Hey, Kurogiri. I’m bringing my girlfriend back. Do we have the stuff for sake bombs?”

Girlfriend?! 

When a low voice burbled through the line, you snapped back to reality.

“Oh. Yeah. Hold on.” Tomura’s gaze swept the alley until he spotted the bag, lying forgotten on the pavement. “My hands are full. Grab it for me when you open the portal. It’s by my left shoe.”

“Portal? What are you—?”

Before you could finish, purple smoke engulfed the alley, swallowing your startled scream.

When the thick smoke cleared, you found yourself in a dank, beige room. The only light came from the hazy glow of dual OLED monitors atop a minimalist brown desk. Above this, tacked to the wall with enough dossiers to please even the most obsessive conspiracy theorist, was a well worn world map pockmarked with pin holes. Overcrowded shelves, packed with precariously leaning books and muscle-bound action figures hung above a squat, overflowing garbage can. To your right, a thin, stained carpet and well scratched chabudai sat on the floor. Ripe with the smell of stale cup ramen and sweaty bed sheets, the room howled “man child”.

Tomura kicked off his red sneakers, letting them thunk against one of the many overstuffed trash bags. It flopped to its side, knocking over empty two liters like a line of bowling pins. He shuffled past the clutter and set you on a rumpled pile of bedsheets. The mattress groaned. He crossed his arms.

“Don’t whine about the mess. That hero idiot forced me to speed run. I didn’t exactly have time to clean up.”

You stared at him. “Speed run?”

Ratty nails raked his neck. “I was going to follow you for a while. You know. Get a feel for what you liked before I brought you home.” He pointed to a shopping bag laying near the bed. “That was all I managed.”

“It’s… for me?”

The scratching intensified. “No, I just like cross dressing,” he snapped, jabbing his hand at the package again. “Yes, they’re for you. I had to talk Sensei out of some expensive silk crap, so be grateful.”

Holding your breath, you tore the plastic open and upended the contents into your lap. Crafted from super soft, fluffy polyester, a fuzzy pajama set spilled into your lap. The V neck crop tank and high waisted shorts looked like something an e-girl would use to cosplay a kawaii teddy bear. A matching thigh-length robe, complete with oversized hood and baggy sleeves, took the look from “my furry fantasy” to “comfy cozy”.

…this actually looked like something you would wear.

You held the tank against your chest. The fit was alarmingly correct. When you glanced up, Tomura’s excited smile wrinkled his nose.

“You casual-up cute.”

Steam poured from your ears

He leaned forward, reaching for the zipper of your dress. You scooted back, colliding with the wall. With an eye roll, Tomura kneeled on the bed, crawling toward you. One hand caught your shoulder. The other grabbed for the tab.

“So you can touch me but not the other way around? Did you honestly expect me to be okay with that?”

“That’s normal for a hostess and client!” you protested.

He sneered, his husky voice rasping in your ear. “You went pretty far out of your way to lose me as a client, remember ?”

Tooth by tooth, the zipper crawled down to your hemline. Tomura peeled open the slinky outfit. Red eyes roamed over your flesh toned satin bra and simple, smooth seamed panties. He sniggered, his fingers trailing down your waist.

“Wow… talk about low effort.”

You glared at him.

“Oh come on. I’m not mad or anything. Pretty obvious you never meant for any of those guys to see these. Makes me feel pretty special.” He hooked his thumbs under the waistline of your panties and began to shuffle them down. “Besides, it’s not like you’ll be needing them anyways.”

A shaking hand caught his shoulder. "W-what are you doing?!"

He glared at you. “I want to see,” he demanded, yanking harder.

"Then look at hentai or something!”

“You got to see mine,” he deadpanned.

“You got a blow job out of it!”

Tomura clicked his tongue and rolled his eyes. “...and you left me with blue balls.”

“You got more than I did!”

He broke into an eerie grin. “Oh? Did you want more?”

You froze.

Five fingers clamped down on the stretchy fabric. Powder ash tickled across your thighs.

Shadows filled his wrinkled smile. “I can do that," he declared, pointing to his nose.

"Hey! Hold on!" You shoved his shoulder. It was like pushing on a brick wall.

Tomura leaned in, reaching for your bra. Your leg jerked. He bucked up and caught your knee just below his crotch. He growled, squeezing hard in the divots on both sides of the joint.

"Did you forget what happens if you jump around too much?"

Panicked eyes flashed to long, calloused fingers before jumping to his face. The predatory, blood red stare pinned you like a bear trap. Burning breath caught in your chest. Numb lips opened, closed and opened again. With no air to carry the words, you squeezed your eyes shut. Tears welled in your lashes.

“Hey… come on now.” His thumb hooked under your chin, lifting your head. “I wouldn’t make you my girlfriend if I wanted to kill you.” He patted your cheek. “You can move all you want in a minute. Just let me check something first.”

“Check what?” you whispered.

He snorted. “You’re the one that told me to Google it.”

Grabbing your other knee, Tomura pried your legs centimeter by centimeter. Scratchy hands scraped down your bare, inner thighs. Goosebumps prickled across your arms. By the time he’d butterflied you open to his hungry gaze, you felt the tickle and torn nails on sensitive skin. With a crooked finger on either side, he parted your lower lips, staring deep inside. He paused, shifting his body until the pale light of the dual monitors drove away the shadows. You stiffened when one pointer tapped the tacky tissue.

“Should have known,” he muttered, sitting back on his haunches. “The color isn’t right and you’re not wet.”

Your face caught fire. “You actually Googled the receptive period signs?! Seriously?!”

Shigaraki ran his hand through his hair and shook his head. “Guess it was too much to ask for a high spec target like you to give me beginner mode, huh?”

High spec, huh? Okay.... Bonus points for that, crusty boy.

“Beginner… mode?” You puzzled over the word for a moment before a startling conclusion slammed into your brain. Sweat beaded down your neck. Your words stumbled out. “Wait… I knew you were bad with girls but… are you… are you really a…?”

Tomura scowled at you, scratching his neck. “So what? You gonna look down on me or something?”

Oh… so… you let touch starved, crazy, virgin stick his dick in you? Your mind whirled, quickly calculating what fresh hell you had brought upon yourself.

public static void calculateChanceOfEscape(int levelOfCrazy, boolean isFirstLove, int qualityOfPreviousBlowjob){int abilityToEscape =0;  if (isFirstLove==true){  int touchStarvedFactor = qualityOfPreviousBlowjob*2; abilityToEscape= levelOfCrazy*touchStarvedFactor; }  Else{ abilityToEscape = levelOfCrazy*10;  } int chanceOfEscape = 100 - abilityToEscape;  System.out.println("Your chance of escape is "+chanceOfEscape+ "%");  }  public static void main(String[] args) { calculateChanceOfEscape(10, true, 10); } CalculateChanceOfEscape(levelOfCrazy 10, isFirstLove: true, qualityOfPreviousBlowjob 10);

…

…

…

Output - Chance Of Escape = -100%

Sweat beaded down your brow. Slowly, softly, you started to speak. “Hey… Tomura. I swear, I didn’t mean to—”

A hard hand slammed into the wall beside you. Crumbling paint dusted your shoulder. Bulging, bloodshot eyes stared into your soul. “Didn’t mean to what ?!”

Craaaaaaaappppppppppppp!

As you whimpered, his dead stare softened to a confused head tilt. “Oh. Wait. Of course you didn’t. It’s not like you can control what time of the month it is.” He broke into an eerie grin. “Ah… so that’s why you put me through that tutorial, right?”

…tutorial? What was he—?

“If I just do the things you had the player do in game, you should be able to warm up without any problems.” He cackled, ruffling your hair. “Geeze. Next time, just say something if you need me to grind first.”

In one sweep, Tomura slammed you down onto the mattress. Old springs squealed in protest as grey swirls over took your vision. Fighting through the ringing in your ears, you squinted up at him.

“Ooops. I’m used to going PvP with Tanks, but your build is more of a Glass Cannon, huh?” [8]

You groped for a hold on old, pilling sheets. Tomura shuffled between your legs. Five fingers plucked your bra strap. Warm breath fanned across your ribs. Dust tumbled from your body.

“You’re lucky I read a lot of walk-throughs.”

Pinky up, Tomura grabbed your breasts with both hands, squeezing the soft tissue with excessive force. When you whined, he lifted his head and raised an eyebrow.

“Still too hard, huh?” he muttered, shifting himself against your bare core. “Right. I’ll lower the input then.”

Loosing his boney grip, he rolled his hands over your breast before raising them a few milliliters. Back and forth, his palm tickled across your skin. As your nipples began to harden, well chewed thumbs circled their tips. Pinching the nub between thumb and forefinger, he teased both sides of you into puckered peaks. 

Electric pleasure clamped tight into already tense muscles. Your back arched. An airy gasp escaped.

“Oh? Like that, huh?”

Waves of pale blue tickled your skin. Sour breath wrinkled your nose. You tried to scoot out of his grasp. It was no use. One hand pulled away from your chest before clamping on your thigh.

“Kinda hot when you squirm for me,” he groaned. “Just no sudden movements, all right?”

Before you could reply, Tomura’s mouth engulfed the tip of your breast. Slow suction teased raw skin between his teeth. As sharp teeth trapped the taunt nipple, nimble fingers continued their relentless assault on the other side. 

“Tomura—!” you yelped. “Time out! Time out!”

The man above you shivered. “You really expect me to stop when you say my name like that?”

“Seriously Tomu-AH!” 

Frantic protests melted into an embarrassing moan when a moist tongue flicked over hot flesh. Your hands balled into the sheets. His head bobbed with each erotic suckle, leaving you writhing into musky bedding. His flat pillow felt crusty under your cheek. Like he was trying to eat you alive, Tomura nipped a bruising trail down your body. 

“Tomura. Please,” you begged. “Please listen to me.”

He paused, resting his cheek against your inner thigh. Scratchy hairs from his five o’clock shadow scraped delicate skin. You shuddered. Whiney words slipped from dry lips as you stared up at him through tear -eyes. 

“Not like this. This is too fast.”

Tomura scowled. “You need me to slow it down more?” He grumbled to himself, hitching your hips higher. “Fine. I guess you did it for me after all.”

His slick tongue dove between your lower lips. A needy gasp torn from your throat. Your hips bucked. Pinkies still raised, Tomura clamped down on your body, leaving deep dents in your thighs. His wide, flat tongue stroked from bottom to top in languid laps. When he reached the tender nub at the top, you jolted again. He paused and swirled over the area a second time. One whimper from you and a naughty grin slipped onto his face.

“Well, that wasn’t that hard to find.”

Electric pleasure shot up your nerves as cracking lips encircled your swollen clit. Every wet suck dragged the air from your lungs. Trembling legs clenched around his shoulders, burning him in a vice grip of quivering thighs. A moment's reprieve gave you just enough time to watch him flatten his tongue before redoubling his efforts. Time blurred. Errant thoughts caught in a cloud of lewd indulgence. By the time he pulled away, your drool stained his pillow.

Slowly staggering from the fog, your hazy focus drifted down to the man between your legs. Stray curses accompanied violent efforts to shed skin tight jeans. A vicious tug tore the tab off his zipper. With a feral snarl he slapped a hand to his newfound enemy, decaying the denim into a pile of ash. Ratty cotton briefs landed in a pile on the floor. 

Tomura’s swollen cock bobbed against your mound, leaving a pool of sticky precum on your skin. He pumped himself twice, licking his dry lips. As the slick tip prodded your twitching entrance, a wave of panic slammed you back to reality.

“NO!”

Tomura caught your wrists. You clawed the air mere centimeters from his face.

“Condom!” you demanded breathlessly. “You have to use a condom!”

“Huh?” He wrinkled his nose. “Why?”

“Rabbits are induced ovulators, remember?” you stressed, pulling against him. “It’s the act that causes the egg to drop, not the time of the month!”

Tomura froze. Red eyes stared through you. “You… don’t… have safe days?”

“Yes! Exactly!” You sighed with relief, flopping back into the mattress. “Geeze. Don’t scare me like that. I thought I’d never get through to you.”

Wait. Why did your hands feel numb?

All at once, a bone chilling cold blanketed your body. You turned your head. Tomura’s fingers dug hard into your wrists. You tried to wiggle your fingers. The bones creaked against his ruthless grip. As you strained against him, his body started to tremble.

“Hey… Tomura? A-are you okay?” you whispered. 

Glowing red eyes locked onto yours. Horrified, you watched as a hideous grin split his face from ear to ear. With a savage yank, he dragged your mouth to his. The ravenous kiss split your lip. You yelped. He lapped at the blood with a low moan. More biting than caressing, his embrace left your skin burning. Panting, he finally pulled away. Hot, sour breath fanned your cheek. 

In an instant, the world turned upside down. Forced face first into crusty cotton, his filthy sheets stifled your startled squeak. You climbed to your elbows, only to be yanked backwards into his boney lap. Tomura hurriedly shoved his shabby pillow underneath your body. As soon as you were properly propped, he grabbed your hips with bruising force. He leaned over your body, pinning you with his weight.

“So,” he rasped in your ear. “If I knock you up, you’d have to stay with me right?”

Your heart screeched to a halt. 

“Wait. No.” Dark chuckles poured from his chest. “You’d want to stay with me, so I can take care of you.” He buried his head against your spine, grinning madly into your back. “I don’t dislike that idea.”

“Wait a second! That’s not what I—”

His moist cock prodded your entrance. “Doesn’t matter what you meant. You put the idea in my head.” Sinister giggling shook both of you. “You better take responsibi~lity. ❤”

With a hiss, Tomura sunk himself inside you. Traitorous folds, soft and pliable from his earlier attentions, parted easily with each stilted thrust. Terrified to struggle one finger too far, you went limp in his hold. It did you little good. Clamped down tight on the wings of your hips, Tomura dragged your listless body further and further along his shaft. Slimy drool spilled from cracking lips, weaving a cold, tickling trail down the side of your ribs.

“You feel so good,” he moaned.

Cheek pressed into the mattress, every pop of your spine left you gritting your teeth. His blankets balled in your fists. Tender nipples grazed the bedding, back and forth until the unmistakable tingle of pleasure rippled across your skin. The coarse cotton cover of his musty pillow clipped your clit. Raw friction burned your nerves.

When Tomura rutted against your deepest wall, you barely muffled your breathy shriek.

He reached down, turning your jaw. “Oh come on. Don’t be like that.” With a husky purr, he untagged the stray strands caught in the corner of your mouth. “I wanna hear them. The little noises you make just for me.”

You whimpered, twisting into the mattress.

With a snarl, he wrapped his arms around your chest and dragged you up onto your elbows.

“I said, I want to hear you,” he growled, grinding into your body.

You gasped.

“See? Not so hard, was it?”

Tomura slowed himself, taking long drags instead of bouncing beats. He pulled out to the tip. A crooked finger stretched your entrance open. His spongey head circled for a second, painting your skin with the mix of your fluids. The cold air battered your exposed core, sending shivers up your spine. He paused, trailing the digit down your cunt like an artist, admiring his work. Then, he plunged back in, stretching you over his length.

Slow thrusts pushed you back into the scraggly pillow. Tears rolled down your cheeks. With each deep dive, your aching clit grated against scratchy fabric. Crawling need clawed its way up your body, merging with the tingling at your breasts. Tense teeth parted as a strained whine slipped from your lips.

“Oh?”

He shifted forward, pressing you harder against the bedding. The next plunge strained against your walls, leaving you trapped between twin pleasures. Shaking knees buckled into the foam. Back arching, your cunt clenched tight around him.

Tomura sneered, bringing his full weight to bare on your back. “That’s it. Don’t think. Just focus on how good it feels to be full of my cock.”

Tangled in his vice grip, there was nothing you could do but accept his pace. Languid teasing turned into firm friction. Tomura groped for your breast. Boney fingers rubbed hard circles into your sensitive nub. Wet, erotic clicks from between your legs laid the backbeat of a blissful melody. The world slipped away until only desperate need filled your every thought. 

“T-Tomura.” You squirmed under him, toes curled in the air. “Ah— So close... I…”

“Do it. Come on my cock.” He panted in your ear. Teeth gnashing, he clutched you tight.  “Wanna feel you milking me. Hah… Taking my cum so deep.”

Ice flooded your veins. “Stop!” you begged, shoving against him with all your strength. “Please, stop!”

He grunted, his movements speeding inside you. “Couldn’t—ha! Even if I w-wanted to.”

“No! ” you shrieked, clawing at the blankets. “Pull out! Take it out, Tomura!”

Locking himself cheek to cheek, he canted his pelvis to a steeper angle. Shallow, sharp pulses reverberated through your body, sending shockwaves of pleasure twitching through your flesh. His swollen head bore down on your front wall, dragging your puffy clit against his pillow. Swirling vision speckled as tipped over the edge.

“Ah… Gonna breed you.” He pounded into your hips. “Fill your cunt with my cum.”

With one last groan, Tomura’s cock pulsed, painting your insides with his release.

Quivering in his arms, salty tears dribbled down your jaw. You buried your face in the blankets. Wretched sobbing shook your frame.

“Hey now,” he purred, petting your rumpled hair. “It’s okay.” He rolled onto his side, yanking you into his chest. He squeezed you once before letting his hand wander to your belly. “I told you I’d take care of you and I meant it.” 

You sniffled and loosed a bitter whine.

“It’ll be fine.” He shushed you like a child, tracing delicate circles across your belly. “We'll raise the kid, and then we can raze this whole society, together. After all, I want to give my girlfriend what she really wants.”

You stiffened in his grasp.

He pressed a scratchy kiss to your raw cheek before muttering: “Way more you than some tacky pink rock.”

🐇 ~Fin~ 🐇

Need more dark romance with hot yandere villains? Check out my original reader insert novel:

Maid For Your Master by Afipia Felis

Available world wide in paperback and ebook.

CW available here

Reviews from readers like you:

"...The fantasy world is lush and the descriptions feel very historically real... This is a story written [with] the kind of dark heroes who feel real, and who don't immediately reform when the heroine batts her eyes at them..." - (Amazon)

"...It also has a lovely dark plot that really gives off the best historical tropes in a really well thought out world :)..." - (Amazon Kindle)

"Delightfully Devious! One thing I also particularly enjoyed about this book was the POV. Its very seldom that you find well written novels written this way. This was a very thrilling book and I can't wait to read more!" - (Goodreads.com)

Read the first three chapters for free on Amazon and Google Play.

Artwork:

Chapter Seven Excerpt By NoNoBadCat

Taglist: @bat-eclecticwolfbouquet-love @shig-a-shig-ah @castershellwrites @smilinghowever @krystalwithakay @iris-goddess @ss-syche @mortallysparklyfun @meameows @magnificentclodpiezonk @betterfettered @utena-akashiya @ventdavi154 @st4rrust @imaginedheroine @the-lady-writes-what @shiggysimp69 @toughbook @naughteehee @tampon-earrings @alotofpussy @derobsawiempleh @jadke-bean @saintvinny @cookiecrumblemoonster @curlyangelsblog @hurthermore @prehistoricfreak @insomniamoth22 @celesterdzc18 @sasuqahs @gloomysel@ohnoitsthatonekid @tracksuit-goth @cinnatwisted@anteabelle @unlikelytrio @meru-the-succubus@diawh0re@linastired @mikeyrights @headmastermephistopheles @omisdolly @nochedeodio @starstruckvega @laurelyna @shiggysimp69 @certainlygay@rxyno @ventdavi154@patch-workk @paranormal-dude@grenosethino@fancylardbucket @utena-akashiya@toughbook@oklolnoty@zombiegr1 @shyyykat @ushi-uri @flamme-meuf2-shiggy @vampirec0w @perpetual-fangirl900 @nekolover93@saskenma@betterfettered @thread-knight@st4rrust @sparrowwritesforop @aphorditeslust@pindelighted @tadokorochann @usaggii

@beeandtrees@justineangelrococo@aaangeliii

[marvelobsessed134]

Sparks Fly part 2

Series masterlist

A/n: so sorry this took so long to get out 😭 also the timeline is kinda messed up but it’s 90s!tommy in this story so yeah takes place in the 90s

Pairings: Tommy Lee x Fem!Country Singer!reader

And soon enough you got a call from Tommy. He asked you out for dinner and of course you said yes. You’re so nervous, though. You know of his reputation and how he was with drugs not too long ago. But he’s so handsome and was so sweet you. You just had to say yes.

So, you’re in a light pink dress with peasant sleeves. Your hair in a ponytail with a light pink bow on it. Light makeup adorned your face. You had some pearl jewelry and white kitten heels. As you stood in front of the hotel room mirror making sure everything looked good when you got a knock on the door.

You sighed before shoving your nerves down and opening the door. Tommy stood before you with a grin on his face and flowers in his hand.

“Wow, you look…” he trailed off taking in your whole outfit.

You blushed, “Thanks.”

“Oh!” He said suddenly, jerking the flowers towards you, “I got you these. Wasn’t sure what your preferences on flowers were but thought I’d get ‘em anyways.” You took the bouquet from him and brought them to your nose, sniffing them.

“They’re beautiful Tommy.” You gushed before walking over and setting them on the nightstand. You’ll have to find a way to travel with them without them dying.

Then, the two of you were off on your first date. He took you to this very nice restaurant in Hollywood. Despite you having quite a bit of money yourself, it was way more fancy than you’ve ever been to.

The waiter showed you to your table and the questions began.

“So, I noticed you’re in a hotel…is your house getting renovated or something?” The drummer asked.

“Oh no. I live in Nashville but since I did a few shows here I stayed in a hotel.” You explained the most obvious reason why you were in a hotel.

“Nashville huh? So you’re a real country girl.”

You chuckled, “I guess you can say that. I’ve lived there my whole life. It’s my home yknow?”

“Yeah I can see that.”

It was quiet for a moment before you spoke up again, “So what’s going on with the band right now? I heard you guys laid off Vince?” It was a touchy subject sure, but you really wanted to know what the hell they were thinking when they fired the singer.

“Yeah, but it’s all cool cause we got a new guy, John Corabi. It’s better that way.” And he left it at that.

The two of you talked more and more, all throughout the night. You just couldn’t stop asking about each other.

As Tommy walked you out towards his Ferrari you said, “That was one of the most fun dates I’ve had in a long time.”

“Really?” He looked down at you and raised an eyebrow.

You leaned your head against his shoulder, “Yeah.”

“I’m glad then. I guess I held up to your standards?”

“Haha, yeah. I mean it’s not like I have any to begin with but you’re so respectful and sweet. Not to offend you but you’re a lot different than-“

“The media makes me out to be? Yeah. When I find a girl I really like I make sure to treat her as a queen.” Your stomach fluttered with butterflies.

The two of you got in his car and he turned on the radio but turned down the volume so you could still talk.

“I don’t believe I’ve asked you this but how old are you?” He asked.

“23.” You answered honestly.

“Ok, I’m 31. Was just making sure.”

“I thought you liked younger girls?” You teased.

“I do well- not under 18 girls you know…over 18? Fuck.”

You giggled as he tried to explain himself, “It’s fine. You know my mama told me not to go with older men better yet men in rock n roll bands but, you’re just so…different.” Tommy smiled at your southern accent.

“I’m not the best man in the world, I’ve done some pretty fucked up shit. Maybe not as much as Nikki but…” the drummer trailed off.

You put your hand over his that was sitting on the center console. He looked over at you with those brown eyes. “We’re human, we all do things we regret. That’s just how life works. Imagine if we didn’t do anything wrong, that’d be really boring and no lessons would be learned.”

“I see why you have an award for best songwriting.”

“Yeah, I guess Im somewhat of a poet myself.”

[genshingorlsrevengeance]

Persona 3/Fire Emblem Three Houses Crossover Megapost

In celebration of Persona 3 Reload coming out and reigniting my love for S.E.E.S, and wanting to write Three Houses once again, I figured I could do both at once. If you wanna see more, feel free to request interactions/scenarios, I'd be happy to! Enjoy the shenanigans of the Blue Lions and S.E.E.S!

Word Count: 3.2k Content: Blue Lions meeting the P3 Protagonists, Sylvain talking to Aigis, Dimitri talking to Minato and Minako, Byleth and Sothis meeting Elizabeth, and Blue Lions reacting to Personas

Blue Lions meeting the P3 Protagonists ===============================

Byleth walked through the crowded hallways of Garreg Mach Monastery, accompanied by the two mysterious visitors that appeared during the bandit attack.

One was a blue haired boy, both hands in his pocket as he emotionlessly glanced around, ignoring the gaze of the students.

The one beside him was a brown haired girl with a ponytail, who in contrast seemed far more enthusiastic about meeting everyone, waving hello to some of the students.

(Minako) "Come on, you can at least smile a little! We're representing Gekkoukan after all."

Minato rolled his eyes and coldly replied.

(Minato) "Junpei is already ruining our reputation for us back at the entrance. No need for me to do anything."

Minako sighed and looked at her new teacher with a wry smile.

(Minako) "Sorry, this is probably not a good introduction, is it?"

Byleth shrugged, turning to face the both of them. His expression was not too dissimilar from Minato's.

(Byleth) "Honestly, I don't really know how to approach this better than you all. I'm a mercenary."

Minako put a finger to her chin as her brows furrowed.

(Minako) "Hm...Think we should have gotten Mitsuru-senpai to take care of the talking for us?"

(Minato) "Probably."

Minako shrugged shortly after thinking about the situation, her smile quickly coming back.

(Minako) "Well, too late for regrets now!...Actually, where are we going?"

(Byleth) "We're heading towards the...Blue Lions classroom I believe. Dimitri said he wanted to thank you two personally, I have to go to meet with some other people, but I'll check back with you all later."

After departing with Byleth, the siblings entered through a large double door and saw Dimitri surrounded by seven unfamiliar faces.

Dimitri gave them a nod of acknowledgement as the group scattered to make room.

(Dimitri) "I take it your group is getting accustomed to Garreg Mach?"

Minako smiled in response, first looking at everyone's expression and taking note of them before giving an answer. Minato meanwhile kept his stoic look and let his sister do the speaking.

(Minako) "Psh, not in the slightest! We've never seen anything like this back in our world."

An orange haired girl spoke up.

(Annette) "Another world? Wow, so the rumors weren't kidding! That'd certainly explain the weird looking clothes."

A larger dark skinned man standing next to Dimitri followed up her comment with a respectful bow.

(Dedue) "Where your group comes from is irrelevant, we all owe you a debt of gratitude for saving his highness."

Minato nodded back.

(Minato) "Of course. And thanks for giving our friends a place to stay."

(Sylvain) "Jeez, that guy's a little intense. Doesn't he remind you of a certain someone?"

Sylvain elbowed Felix, who gave an annoyed glare back.

(Felix) "Shut up already. They can hear you, you know."

(Minako) "Eh, don't worry about my baby brother here! He's usually like this."

(Mercedes) "Oh, you two are siblings? I wouldn't have guessed!"

Minato replied in an emotionless tone, though it did not carry any hint of malice in it.

(Minato) "We get that a lot."

(Ingrid) "If there's anything you guys need help with, feel free to reach out! My name's Ingrid, by the way."

Everyone took a moment to introduce themselves.

(Ashe) "I really look forward to getting to you know you all!"

Minako gave him a warm smile back.

(Minako) "Me too! And though he may not look like it, this one is too!"

(Minato) "Hm."

The siblings departed the Blue Lions to find their own group, leaving them to converse amongst themselves.

(Dimitri) "They appear to be...a unique bunch."

(Annette) "Minako seems really nice! Though, I couldn't really get a read on her brother."

(Ingrid) "It probably won't take long for Sylvain to piss him off."

(Sylvain) "Hey, why are you making it sound like he will get angry at me? We could be best buds!"

(Felix) "Is that right? Well, I'm not holding my breath."

(Mercedes) "This is going to be a fun year with them around, that's for sure!"

(Ashe) "Probably super chaotic too. I wonder what the rest of their group is like."

(Dedue) "If they are anything like us, Ashe, I'm sure it won't take them long to adjust."

=============================== Sylvain talking to Aigis ===============================

Aigis appeared to be standing still near the greenhouse, quietly examining the plants.

She had been that way for nearly an hour before she was approached by Sylvain.

(Sylvain) "Hey there, Aigis! Whatcha doin' here?"

Her head stiffly turned to face Sylvain and gave a single nod, her face remaining unchanged.

(Aigis) "I am observing the plants in your world. They appear to be very similar to our own, but differ in properties and how they are utilized."

Sylvain tilted his head curiously, turning to look at the plants with a look of genuine curiousity.

(Sylvain) "Huh. I never really thought about that kind of thing before, but it must be crazy for you to see plants be made into healing potions."

(Aigis) "Negative. Plants were used by humans for medicinal purposes, ranging back thousands of years. But the potency of your flora appear to be far stronger than the ones found on Earth."

Her answer confused him, making him shake his head and remember why he was there to begin with.

(Sylvain) "...Okaaay, kinda lost me there. But, if you're wanting to see other things that are different, how about going out into town with me?"

(Aigis) "Are you asking me out on what they refer to as a 'date'?"

Sylvain chuckled at her question.

(Sylvain) "If you wanna call it that, then sure-!"

(Aigis) "The answer is no."

(Sylvain) "Wha- why not?!"

(Aigis) "Minato-san has specifically warned me to not go on any dates. Especially with you, Sylvain."

Though her tone was completely static, he could gleam a bit of malice in the response.

(Sylvain) "Okay listen, whatever he told you about me is not true!"

(Aigis) "He has not told me anything."

(Sylvain) "Then who did?"

Aigis paused for a moment before resuming.

(Aigis) "...The list is as follows: Ingrid, Felix, Dimitri, Dorothea, Yukari, Junpei, Mitsuru, Minako, Byleth-"

(Sylvain) "Alright alright, I got the message across! But surely you must be curious about going outside the Monastery for at least a few hours? I can be a tour guide at least!"

Aigis paused once again.

(Aigis) "...I comprehend. If this is not a date, then I do not have a problem with this request."

(Sylvain) "G-Great! See you in half an hour?"

(Aigis) "Affirmative. I also have an order I am obliged to follow, given by Minato and Minako in regards to you."

Sylvain wasn't even sure he wanted to know what it was.

(Sylvain) "And that is...?"

(Aigis) "I am authorized to use force if pressured onto a date."

(Sylvain) "F-Force?! Now hang on just a-"

(Aigis) "Commencing preparations. Please meet me by the entrance in half an hour."

Aigis walked away, leaving Sylvain standing by himself with an open jaw.

(Sylvain) "What the heck is with her?!"

C Support Reached!

=============================== Dimitri talking to Minato and Minako ===============================

Dimitri walked into the dormitories where the S.E.E.S members had taken up residence during their stay at Garreg Mach.

At the moment it was just Minato sitting on the couch with a strange device on his ears, and Minako reading a book from the library.

Minako looked up from her book and waved to Dimitri.

(Minako) "Hey, Dimitri! Surprised to see you here!"

Minato noticed Minako moving and grabbed the right side of his device and lifted it off. Dimitri could hear words coming out of it.

"Hey, hey, hey" Fueling the fire with the burning desire-

(Minato) "Hey."

(Dimitri) "Are those words coming out of that earmuff?"

(Minako) "Oh, that's right! I forget you guys don't know what headphones are!"

Minato raised an eyebrow at his sister.

(Minato) "We've been in a medieval world this entire time, and you forgot that it doesn't have technology like ours?"

(Minako) "Hush you! Anyways, that's a small...thingy that can play music, in short. Now whatcha need?"

Dimitri cleared his throat after focusing away from Minato's headphones.

(Dimitri) "Truthfully, I was curious to see what you all got up to in your free time. You seemed to have adjusted to the school life well, but I was wanting to make sure you could do so in your free time."

Minato shrugged nonchalantly.

(Minato) "We're managing, surprisingly."

(Minako) "Yeah, who knew that hanging out with a buncha people our age who can cast fireballs would seem so normal!"

(Dimitri) "That's another thing I wanted to ask. Your group seems well versed in combat already. What exactly is your home like?"

(Minako) "Weeeeeelll-"

Her voice trailed off, waving one hand dismissively.

(Minako) "Just self defense is all! We have to deal with vagrants in our world too."

(Dimitri) "Is...that right?"

(Minato) "You're a worse liar than Ashe-"

Minako immediately pointed at her little brother.

(Minako) "YOU! YOUR FACE, SHUT!"

That made Dimitri laugh.

(Dimitri) "I apologize, I did not mean to pry. I am just impressed more than anything."

(Minato) "Relatedly...Today's the first full moon here at Garreg Mach, right?"

Dimitri noticed how both their expressions suddenly became serious.

(Dimitri) "Y-Yes it is. It also means it's nearly been a month since you all first came here. Is the moon significant in your world?"

Minato sat up from the couch and put his hands into his pocket.

(Minato) "Very."

Minato began walking away from the group before giving Dimitri one last look.

(Minato) "You might get your answer sooner than you think."

As he exited the dorm, he turned to Minako.

(Dimitri) "Did I say something wrong?"

(Minako) "Oh, don't mind him. He's usually that much of a jackass...But he's not wrong...Say, how about we spar near midnight, Dimitri?"

=============================== Byleth and Sothis meeting Elizabeth ===============================

Byleth woke up in his bed, rubbing his eye before noticing Sothis was trying to shake him awake.

(Sothis) "Finally! Do you know how long I've been trying to- Know what? Forget it, that doesn't matter! There's something here!"

(Byleth) "Something here? What are you-"

He paused when he noticed there was a blue glow coming from outside the door to his room.

Byleth immediately grabbed his sword and nearly kicked down the door with Sothis floating behind him.

Only to see another door in front of him, glowing blue and with an energy he could not place the feeling of.

(Byleth) "That wasn't here yesterday."

(Sothis) "Your keen senses of observation never ceases to amaze me, child."

Byleth made no comment as he slowly circled around the door. There was nothing it led to, even on the other side.

Byleth saw a group of students walk past the door, giving him an odd look but saying hello, not even acknowledging the door's presence.

(Sothis) "The door feels...strangely familiar."

(Byleth) "Should we go inside it?"

The two exchanged a glance before slowly opening the door and entering it.

...

Inside sat Sothis's throne, now bathed in a ghastly blue aura, a table sitting in front of it, but most notable of all was the fact a woman was standing inside, alone.

(Sothis) "M-My throne!"

The woman turned towards her visitors and politely bowed.

She had blonde hair and a strange blue attire, adorned with a small hat that rested on her head.

While everything about her seemed to be human, the way she portrayed herself and everything surrounding her was anything but.

(???) "Welcome, to the Velvet Room."

(Sothis) "Velvet Room? This is MY room!"

(???) "...Ah, so it is! I was wondering why it was so empty. I hope you do not mind that I have taken up residence here, you have my sincerest apologies!"

Byleth reached for his sword, but suddenly realized it was gone. Deciding to question instead of fight, he simply asked:

(Byleth) "Who are you?"

The woman smiled at the question and bowed once again.

(Elizabeth) "My name is Elizabeth, it is a pleasure to be your acquaintance! I am the attendee to the two under your care."

It took a moment for them to realize who she was talking about.

(Byleth) "Minato and Minako?"

Suddenly, things made sense. Everytime Sothis appeared to talk to him, they appeared to be aware of her, despite the fact no one else in their group could.

They already weren't normal, but this further solidified that something else was at play here.

(Elizabeth) "The Arisato siblings, yes! Well, truth be told my brother is supposed to be here, but alas he is nowhere to be found. But I am more than enough to serve their purpose."

(Sothis) "What do you provide that requires taking over my home?"

(Byleth) "That's in my head, no less..."

(Elizabeth) "I provide them with the fusing of Personas for their journey. Nothing more, and nothing less! For we can only assist, never directly intervene.

Elizabeth put a finger to her chin, thinking about what to say next.

(Elizabeth) "As for the occupation, it seemed this was the only place I could manifest myself that could easily reach you as well. Your fates are all intertwined, after all!"

Sothis sighed and crossed her arms, floating over to Elizabeth.

(Sothis) "You couldn't ask?"

(Elizabeth) "I tried, multiple times. But I believe you were asleep everytime I attempted, and eventually found this empty room, save the throne."

(Byleth) "...That one is more of your fault than anything-"

(Sothis) "Be quiet."

(Elizabeth) "I look forward to getting to know you two as well."

(Byleth) "Well, I'm Byleth, and that's Sothis. I guess we'll get to know you too."

Suddenly, the door opened behind them.

(Minako) "I guess it makes sense for the Velvet room to- OHMYGOD!-"

Minako leapt back in fear while Minato only flinched.

(Minako) "WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING HERE?!"

(Minato) "It's that floating green thing again too-"

(Sothis) "EXCUSE ME?!"

=============================== Blue Lions Reacting to Personas ===============================

(Dimitri) "EVERYONE, TO THE CATHEDRAL!"

The Blue Lions and Byleth dashed across the bridge leading to Garreg Mach's cathedral, bathed in the ominous light of a full moon.

The previously calm black skies had darkened to a sickly pale green glow while being chased by monsters.

While they could kill a few of them, there were too many of them to deal with. And under the moonlight they appeared to be getting stronger.

Ashe, Mercedes, and Annette attempted to hold back the monsters with spells and arrows, but if they stood their ground they would have been overwhelmed.

Instead, Dimitri, Dedue, Felix, and Byleth held the ones in pursuit off while Ingrid and Sylvain tried to find a way inside.

(Sylvain) "Damn it, it's stuck!"

(Ingrid) "Then we gotta kick the door down!-"

Before she could attempt to do so, the ground they were standing on quickly darkened, making everyone look up.

A massive blob-like monster slithered down the walls, with too many arms to count protruding out of it, all wielding swords.

(Annette) "B-BEHIND US!"

Everyone turned around and gained distance as the monster crashed onto the concrete, sending bricks flying into the air at violent speeds.

The Blue Lions had been pincered by these creatures.

(Mercedes) "I-Is this the work of the same people that attacked the burial site?!"

(Dedue) "I am unsure if even they are capable of doing this! The people I had been speaking to suddenly turned into coffins!"

(Byleth) "Here's the plan, when I count to three, we break through these monsters coming from the bridge and make a run-"

Before he could finish his sentence, they all heard someone speaking to them.

(Fuuka's Voice) "Thank goodness, you all are still okay! Can you hear me?!"

(Felix) "Is that...Fuuka?!"

(Ashe) "Is she in danger too?! How can we hear-"

(Fuuka's Voice) "Everyone needs to get back to a safe distance from the Shadows on the bridge, right now!"

Without warning, the shadows suddenly burst into a black mist from what appeared to be an ice spell.

Mitsuru, Akihiko, Ken, Shinji, Aigis, and even their dog, Koromaru, were standing from the entrance, all wielding weapons.

(Mitsuru) "Everyone, escape to us, we'll keep you safe!"

Before anyone could react, Minato, Minako, Junpei, and Yukari ran in front of them, all wielding strange devices in their hands with red armbands.

(Dimitri) "Wait, that thing is too dangerous for you to-!"

Minako turned to them with a smirk, giving them a thumbs up and cutting Dimitri off.

(Minako) "Don't worry. Bandits and cultists are your guys things, Shadows are ours!"

(Junpei) "Hell yeah, time for us to finally shine!"

(Yukari) "Please focus, you two!"

(Minato) "You wanted to see where we got our combat skills from, right Dimitri? Here's your answer."

Everyone watched with confusion as they pointed strange devices to all their heads.

(Minato/Minako, Junpei, and Yukari)

"ORPHEUS!" "HERMES!" "IO!"

The monster seemed to recoil in surprise once the four pulled the trigger, summoning monsters of their own, igniting the area around them in a bright blue flame.

They rushed the monster with their weapons raised, joined by their ghastly summons and seemed to attack with near perfect synchronization.

Looking back at the bridge, the rest of them appeared to be doing the same and wiping out the smaller monsters with ease.

(Shinji) "The hell are you doing standing still, get a damn move on!"

(Byleth) "You heard them, MOVE IT!"

The Blue Lions did as commanded, running from the fight, though most of them couldn't tear their eyes off from what they were seeing.

(Sylvain) "Holy hell, they're tearing those things apart! What even are they?!"

(Felix) "Tch, no wonder they always seemed like they were holding back, it's because they were!"

(Annette) "Are those made from magic?!"

(Mercedes) "They look more like ghosts to me!"

(Ashe) "I-I hope they're not, but I'm glad they're on our side!"

(Ingrid) "Think they can teach us how to do that too?"

(Dedue) "I do not think we should be asking questions like these right now!"

(Dimitri) "Agreed, we need to find somewhere safe!"

(Byleth) What kind of place is their world where fighting monsters like these is normal for them?!

...

(Elizabeth) "Hah, I knew they'd have no problem."

Sothis watched the ongoing fight with her jaw opened wide, not believing what was happening.

...

Once the Full Moon Shadow was dispatched of, the members of S.E.E.S moved to find the Blue Lions.

(Fuuka) "Good work everyone, the rest of the shadows are disappearing en masse."

(Mitsuru) "Operation complete, though I cannot say I feel particularly great after this victory."

(Ken) "I can't believe the Dark Hour followed us here..."

(Koromaru) "Woof!"

(Aigis) "Koromaru agrees."

(Minato) "Makes sense something would be up if we could still use our evokers here, even outside the Dark Hour."

(Yukari) "I can't help but feel responsible. We brought the Dark Hour to a place that didn't even have to deal with it..."

(Junpei) "Saving one world was already great, but maybe we'll get the credit for two?"

(Shinji) "Tch, what a pain in the ass."

(Akihiko) "Suppose we just need to keep in mind of the moon here too, on top of all the other things to worry about."

(Minako) "Feels good finally getting to let loose without worrying about witnes-...Oh crap, where did the Blue Lions go! They didn't exactly look like they'd forget about this anytime soon!"

Fuuka quickly found where they were hiding, and S.E.E.S moved to find and explain everything they could.

Or at least, attempt to explain.

Mitsuru and Minato had to do most of the explaining.

[weatherman667]

Hey Weather can you redpill me on bowkind? I never realized how much I needed a half-giantess Elven goddess to fire javelin-sized arrows from a War bow as long as she is tall. And bow variety for the Elven race in general and all their fucking subspecies

It really depends on what kind of Elf you are looking for.

You seem to like assholes Elves, so, if you want to get on your knees, that's probably the way to go.

Tolkien's Elves are immortal, beautiful, and just plain better than you. Problem, though, is they aren't just biologically immortal, they are the reincarnating kind of immortal. So, half-Elves have to pick immortality, or "the gift of men."

Unicorn Overlord has the best Elf Classic society, where magic permeates every part of society. Since the war, they've learned to embrace Humans. Literally, as the main character can give his engagement ring to everyone you want. Spoilers, but it also includes catgirls.

Skeleton Knight has a great balance, too. Elves are long-lived, but not immortal, and their adaptation to Humans is to build a giant wall, and work out treaties.

Warcraft was great, before WoW. Humans and Elves would often go on romantic adventures together.

The High Elves are justifiable arrogant.

The Night Elves are fucking amazons. If you want an amazon Elf, Warcraft Night Elves are the place to go.

[cosmicgardencreative]

Vindictus - F2P Action MMORPG & Why We Love It

Hi all, it's been a minute since Ismaire and I got to let our hair down, so I'm just gonna take a sec to share my love of Vindictus. 

I don't always talk about how a game is underrated, but man, I will stand by Nexon/DevCat's first free-to-play action MMORPG. I've heard many people put it down for how "unoptimized" this game is. I'm not a PC gamer, but I feel that with today's technology, you can definitely play this game on today's graphics standards. 

Obviously this isn't a comparison to the new Vindi in development, but I'm just impressed to see how far this MMO has come.

PaikMyungJin (left, Evie/Choi) and Ismer (right, Lann/Ismaire) make a comeback to Vindictus in 2024.

The game can overall feel pretty simple and low-graphics to some, but frankly, I just see that as the dev team being smart with their resources. The only hang-up I can think is if you have a slow internet connection, it might be a difficult game to play with others, but it's pretty solo-friendly for the first 2-3 seasons. 

Kinkoku (left, Sou/Ismaire) wondering what Biseuri (Sylas/Haegi/Choi) is thinking about.

I'll have to do a separate post that goes into the game's history. There's so much that could be said when the game first rolled out on October 13, 2010 for the US release. Izzy and I dating coincided with us finally having a game we could play together, since a lot of console games weren't prioritizing couch co-op as much (except for Resident Evil 5-6). [[On a separate side note, I just realized where our points of influences could be traced back to about here. All the more reason why we just love some of our old fandoms...]]

The nice thing about Vindictus is that you can play it solely with a keyboard (our preferred controls), a mouse + keyboard, or a gamepad. The game is pretty versatile for people with preferences. Most of the characters respond pretty well to the keyboard controls. The few that I noticed were difficult to maneuver in combat was Kai with his bow and crossgun, and Hurk with his teide (sword + shotgun combo), more for precision reasons than anything. Ultimately, do what's comfortable for you!

Alts, alts, and more alts!

Yes, this game will make you play so many alts. And it's worth it. I find this comparable to FFXIV's multi-job branches that your WoL can unlock, but instead of it all stockpiled to one character, you have multiple MCs with various backstories and even special connections to one another! This game being so lore-heavy actually deserves to have multiple characters for the player to explore with. You'll find over time that you'll catch some things you didn't think about from your first playthrough, and it'll just hit you differently... 😭 

Kiena (Fiona/Choi) slicing through enemies.

BradieHU (bg left, Charon/Izzy) and Lycapollos (fg right, Achel/Choi), hecking over a Kobold commander.

PaikMyungJin firing her lasers at a laser cannon/golem.

Ismer slipdashing past the lasers for the finishing kill.

Can't guarantee great screenshots 100% of the time, but the more you play, the better the chances :) 

______________________________________________________________

Final thoughts:

Being a casual player, I personally can't give a testimony on how the overall MMO culture is like in Vindictus nowadays. We did have a generally good experience since we weren't the types to go ham about stat comparisons and just genuinely want to have fun. You'll likely run into cool people as long as you're a nice and polite gamer. But of course, we weren't exempt from being driven away by guild dramas, which then later caused us to have an on-and-off hiatus from the game since 2014...  (wow it's a decade already...) Just be prepared that you may get inundated with a lot of female characters in very... curvy skins. Some of the costume/outfitters come with special enhancements, and Vindictus really doesn't hide the fact that it's a rated-M game 😳🪭 Personally it does shock me, but at the same time, props to people who aren't afraid to flaunt it 😂

Moonglitter (Eira/Izzy) not afraid to flaunt her "All Curves Revealing Off Shoulder Set". 

Because there's so much content to push through, DevCat did their due diligence in balancing the first 3 seasons of content with gear that rewarded for progressing. If you do appreciate a little bit of a challenge, though, I recommend keeping on the lowbie gear till you know you need the damage boost. And if you ever find yourself not liking the aesthetics, the game is usually good about giving you aesthetic coupons for you to "rent" through events and the AP shop. 

As far as solo/duo-ing experiences go, Izzy and I were able to catch up to Season 3 on our own. We found that we're not able to go through Redeemers currently, but I'm curious to see how well we might be able to duo the battles soon as we're properly geared from endgame :) I'm only hesitant to pug with others because we're not sure if our internet connection could handle a crowd of 2+ external connections. But then again we're working adults who pay for good speed so maybe? lol 

By the way, you get to choose two paths of either a Dark Knight or a Paladin:

Scaley Edgelord

Shiny Sparkle Knight

Thanks for taking the time to read my little appreciation post for Vindictus. If you're another Vindi-fan, feel free to comment on your experience here! Vindictus/Mabinogi Heroes is such a niche fandom, so I'd be happy to chat with others who love the gameplay and lore ^_^ I'm very inclined to share some Vindictus fanart in the near future, so let's have fun!

[akehoshimystar]

Chapter 1

Ito: ( ………………Wow.)

A magnificent, eye-catching chandelier. Pillars and walls made with simple yet beautiful craftsmanship.

Ai: Overall, it’s not bad.

We had come to a venue suitable for special occasions.

Ito: I spoke to the venue staff and they said we can change the layout as we deem fit. 

I think we can recreate the rough decoration plan that Kise-san made for the most part. 

Ai: Leave that to Yuzuru. You go work on tuxedos and the rest.

If you need to adjust your workload, let me know ASAP.

Ito: Yes, sir.

(Okay... I’ll make a list of the necessary steps first. Let’s start with some candidates for food catering….)

Ai: ......Also.

Ito: ?

Kosaka-san suddenly stopped and turned his head to look behind him. 

Ai: How long do you intend eavesdrop? Owner. 

Owner: My bad, I just couldn’t find the right timing to chime in. 

Ito: (I didn't notice him at all!)

Owner: Oh, it’s okay. No need to be that modest.

As he laughed at me bowing my head, the owner of this banquet hall walked towards us with a smile on his face.

Owner: Ah, what a lovely sight. Nothing feels better than seeing your efficient and concise exchange.

That seriously made me want to recruit both of you as planners for our company.

Ai: I appreciate your sentiment, but no thanks. I already have enough opportunities to attend other people’s ceremonial occasions. 

Owner: Kosaka-kun is still the same as always. Then, just her is fine 

Ai: You should have enough manpower. Don't try to poach someone from a place that doesn’t.

Owner: Still a no, huh? What a shame.

Ito: (I heard they knew each other, but their relationship seems to be friendlier than I thought.)

(The owner even brought up this event to Kosaka-san specifically.)

Ai: This will be the venue for our next dress-up event.

Yuzuru: Is this... a wedding reception hall?

Ai: Yeah.

A wedding reception hall that was created with considerable effort as part of the renovation of an old ceremony hall. However, several months have passed since the opening, and reservations are still not increasing as expected, so a major question here is if there’s an interesting way to use it as part of a promotion. Kosaka-san briefly explained how this firm approached him for advice.

Yuzuru: Seems like it would be a good idea to develop a theme that takes advantage of the venue. The first thing that comes to mind is a bridal fair.

Ai: Sounds reasonable enough. It seems like we can use the rental costumes owned by them freely.

Ito: And the costumes in question are….

Ai: Tuxedos.

Ito: (Oh... We’re going all out.)

Yuzuru: Isn’t that nice? I think we can prepare the costumes for the hall members just by checking the size. That’s very kind of them.

Ai: Through our events, we aim to appeal to a different customer group than usual, and we can also expect an influx of that group to come to us.

It’s a win-win situation. We'll do everything we can to achieve the best results with our credible work.

Make sure you all work hard as always.

Ito: (A sure-fire way to attain the best results... Every time I think about it, the pressure just gets bigger and bigger.)

(Regardless of whether or not I can do what is expected of me, let's just put in a lot of effort. A senior at my previous job said that it is important to have a hard-working attitude no matter what it is.)

(.…..I wonder how you're doing, senpai. Are you making delicious rice untroubled right now...?)

Owner: Yashiro-san, right?

Ito: Oh, yes. Sorry for not greeting you properly before.

Owner: Ah. It’s all good.

More importantly, I heard from the staff who showed you around earlier that you carefully took notes and asked about anything that was not well-explained. Also…

“I feel like I can rest easy with Yahiro-san in charge.”, they said. 

Ito: (Not only did they guide us so perfectly, but they also did a follow-up...? Now that’s quality.)

Owner: To be honest, I feel the same way. Thank you for your thoughtfulness. I look forward to working with you.

Ito: Don’t mention it. I would like to express my gratitude for your thorough guidance as well.

It's a great honor to be able to work with you.

Owner: Let’s make the event a big success!

Ito: (I'll see what I can do... Wait, no…)

Yes. I will do my best to make that happen.

Ai: ……

After checking out the venue, we returned to the office and had a convene with Kise-san. After deciding on the general direction and identifying the matters to be confirmed and the necessary documents, we called it a day.

Ito: Ah, hello.

Takeru: Oh my, good work.

Shinobu: Good work.

When I left the office, Mika-san and Aizawa-kun had just finished working at the cafe and were waiting for the elevator.

Shinobu: Are you heading home now, Yashiro-san?

Ito: Yeah. Aizawa-kun and Mika-san.….. Oh. I remember you saying that you’re having a drinking party at the dorm today.

Takeru: Yeah. Akehoshi got some nice booze from a customer, so he invited us for a drink.

Would you like to join us, Ito?

Ito: Thanks for the invitation. Then... Can I come a little later?

There are a few things I need to do first.

Takeru: ...Fufu, sure thing.

Make sure your “few things” are really only a few, okay? Don't overwork yourself.

Ito: Eh?

Shinobu: Overwork?

Takeru: Just telling Ito something. The elevator is here, let's hop on.

Ito: (.…..Judging from that reaction. Mika-san must have guessed that the things I want to get done are work-related.)

He said not to overwork, not “there’s no need to work hard”. I quietly thanked Mika-san for his kind choice of words before heading into the elevator with them.

Shinobu: Come to think of it, I'm wearing a tuxedo for the next cafe event. The last time I wore that kind of get-up was during my acting job.

Ito: (.....?)

Don’t tell me that “acting job” was….

Takeru: Oh my, did you not know about this?

Shinobu: I sometimes help out the Simulation Dept.

It’s mostly when they don’t have enough people. Things like, acting as a friend and keeping things lively.

Ito: (Yeah, someone like Aizawa-kun should have no problem with that.)

Just when I was thinking that I might be able to see that someday as long as I keep working at Aporia…

Ito: ……?

Woman: ……

I noticed a woman standing in a corner of the street with a thoughtful expression. Her gaze was fixed on a poster in front of a store.

Ito: (Oh... That’s for the reception hall we're using for our event.)

After passing by her, Mika-san spoke softly with a lowered voice.

Takeru: Didn't that girl just now seem a bit troubled?

Shinobu: She sure did. I wonder if something happened.

Ito: (So both of them were also worried...)

Takeru: ......Very concerning. I can’t just leave her like this.

Ito: Don’t tell me…

(You’re going to talk to her!?)

Shinobu: Ah, there he goes. Yashiro-san, let’s go too!

Ito: Huh? S-Sure.

Shinobu: I would be surprised if I was suddenly approached by the embodiment of beauty in an ordinary town like this.

Maybe she would feel a bit more trusting to know that there are normal people like us as well. 

Ito: ...I see what you mean.

(Although I agree with everything he said...)

(There might be various opinions as to whether the first impression of Aizawa-kun can be considered a “normal person”. He himself stands out a lot.)

Before I could express my thoughts, I hurriedly chased after Mika-san, who was strutting magnificently in high heels. Little did the woman know that in a few seconds she would be speaking to the embodiment of beauty…

Woman: …….. Ito: (……Tears?)

Chapter 2

[pin-crusher2000]

Mortal Kombat: Earth-66 Part1

As a big fan of Mortal Kombat, here are some character interactions based on the recent games. (Mar’i & Jake)

NightStar (Mar’i Grayson)

1- Mar’i: wow! Another me from another earth!

P2 Mar’i: yup came from an earth where anti-heroes are in charge.

Mar’i: wow, can you tell me more?

2- Mar’i: wonder which one of us is more cuter?

P2 Mar’i: fight me & the winner can be crowned that!

Mar’i: Challenge accepted!

3- Mar’i: even though we are twins, I’m way stronger than you jakey!

Jake: nuh huh, I’m stronger! *sticks tongue out*

Mar’i: nuh huh, I am! *sticks tongue out back.

4- Mar’i: Don’t tell Chris that I like him!

Jake: gonna have to fight me & win first!

Mar’i: *mean growl* I’m gonna hit you where it hurts!

5- Mar’i: you think your arrows are faster than my starbolts?

Lian: yup, I’m the fastest shooter in the world.

Mar’i: that blue hair dye of yours went & messed with your brain.

6- Mar’i: What kinda name is ThunderFart?

Irey: it’s ThunderHeart, not ThunderFart! *giggles*

Mar’i: oops, my bad! *giggles*

Mar’i: you think your faster than my starbolts?

Irey: I don’t think, I know *blows raspberry*

Mar’i: let’s test that out, speedster!

7- Mar’i: you think you’re stronger than a Tamarean princess?

Jai: with my electric super strength, I think I am.

Mar’i: my mom’s a warrior, she trained me to prove you wrong! *sticks tongue out*

8-Mar’i: your pretty strong….for a boy

Robert: what’s that supposed to mean?

Mar’i: I’m a warrior princess!

Mar’i: you think you can take me on Amazonian?

Robert: I know… & I’m a Spartan, not an Amazonian, I’m a boy

Mar’i: you’re gonna be called one when I kick you down there *sticks tongue out in a playful manner*

9- Mar’i: Can you show me a water unicorn?

Cerdian: sure, if you can beat me in a sparring match.

Mar’i: *gasps* prepare to get your butt kicked!

FireWing (Jake Grayson)

1-Jake: wow! I’m not FireWing from where you’re from!

P2 Jake: yup, where I’m from: I’m called SkyBird.

Jake: cooool!

Jake: so there’s a world where I helped restore the powers of people?

P2 Jake: yup, my dad took 80% of the worlds powers before I was born.

2- Jake: it seems you & Chris are like mom & dad before they got married.

Mar’i: yup, he’s the perfect boyfriend! *giggles*

Jake: heh, if he messes with you, I’m gonna kick his butt!

Jake: if I win, I get to choose the movie for movie night.

Mar’i: & if I win?

Jake: *signs* I’ll wear a pink suit for a week.

3- Jake: whats an arrow gonna do to me? It won’t even hurt!

Lian: not if I aim between your legs!

Jake: thank X’hal I wearing a guard.

Jake: can you show me some bow-&-arrow stuff?

Lian: only if you take me flying.

Jake: deals a deal.

4- Jake: I guess your faster than the *west*

Irey: augh! Seriously, you sound like my dad!

Jake: he taught me some things to make you mad. *giggles*

Jake: is it true that when you fart you go faster?

Irey: eww, no! Who told you that?!

Jake: your brother.

5- Jake: really? Is it true?

Jai: yup, we do run faster when we fart.

Jake: *giggles* that’s funny!

Jake: you electric powers seems really familiar.

Jai: how familiar?

Jake: like a black & red spider familiar.

6- Jake: soo buddy, you ready to get your butt kicked?

Robert: *smirks* I’m gonna kick yours, & you can kiss mine!

Jake: ohhh! It’s on now!

7-Jake: what’s better? Fire sticks or water fork?

Cerdian: it’s called a trident, & its magical.

Jake: but can it roast marshmallows though?