#best trope in tha world forever

[snailcubezz]

realizing my main Type in characters is just absolute fail losers in a tie. doesnt matter the gender just . that fucking necktie is the only thang holding them together

[ryuichirou]

RE: Ortho (+Shroudcest) post replies

Phew, alright, I think I didn’t skip anyone. If I did, I’m sorry, I’ll reply to you next time then!

Thank you so much for your wonderful messages of support and for your takes. I really appreciate it! I say it all the time but it saying it again feels appropriate: we had no idea we would ever see so many people who share our point of view despite not shipping Ortho with Idia or any other character. The fact that we can have this conversation really makes me happy.

You are welcome to share more of your thoughts if you want, but unfortunately I might not be able to reply to everyone. I will do my best though.

All of the asks in this blog are related to this post.

Anonymous asked:

Different anon, I think Ortho is in this nebulous situation like superboy in young justice who is physically 16 years old but chronologically 16 weeks old. I genuinely hate the uwu babying of characters. The dwarfs are all second years(so theoretically 17 at the youngest) but no one makes anything with them. Heck the characters I see get lewded the most are the octo trio who are the same age.

Heck, even Grim gets the baby mascot treatment by fans when he's also lumpedwiththefirst years. Like yes, he's a whiny brat but he's also grown up all alone as far as he can remember. I can't help but compare him to Puppycat who acts similarly and is a grown ass man.

Yeah, this probably plays a role too! Ironically, we were just having this conversation about Stitch the other day lol Being new to the world you exist in (and to existing in general) and being a baby aren’t necessarily the same thing.

And even in that case Ortho doesn’t fully fit into the trope because he was created quite a while ago and is already pretty well adjusted. But since he is still learning and doesn’t always understand people + doesn’t always get things like sarcasm, people consider it to be a proof that he is a toddler lol Who am I kidding, their reasoning doesn’t even go that far. They say “he died when he was a baby therefore he is a baby forever” and call it a day.

I feel bad for people who love Grim, I haven’t even thought about it… The Puppycat comparison is so spot-on lol

Grim is inexperienced and doesn’t know much about the world, but yes, he is one of the freshmen + just as he at times acts like a whiny brat, there are also times when he tells Ace that he should be more considerate of Deuce’s feelings, like wtf was that? That was Grim. Because Grim also isn’t a baby, he is a furry gremlin…

Anonymous asked:

As one of the most avid Ortho stans, it really is a pet peeve that people act like he's a little kid

You're so right that it's people that want to write him like Idia's little convenient plot device

I do want to note that it's also sometimes just the infantilization of an autistic coded character

God forbid he be somewhat optimistic, this must mean he's just an innocent baby /s

One small thing that gets me: Ortho can and has made his own gears!! Idia doesn't need to and maybe this is inspired by a post I saw that used the fact that Idia has made his stuff to take away Ortho's agency in what is supposed to be him having a tattoo analog. Not having a character be the architect of their own body mod equivalent is wild and I just.

He's a silly little guy, but he's not a fucking baby!

Indeed, Anon. I feel like people either completely ignore Ortho or see him as Idia’s appendix. I absolutely love them together, and of course I am biased towards scenarios that focus on their deep codependence, but I also really love how they get to have their own adventures, their own relationship, their own experiences separate from each other. Because they are wow, different characters, and Ortho has his own agency. He had it even before ch6, but after that he fully and officially became his own person. Being with Idia is his choice, not his only option. And just like you mentioned, he makes his own gears pretty much all the time now… even though I don’t agree that Idia making his gears has anything to do with Ortho’s agency.

I don’t even think Ortho is that optimistic. He is a little sunshine, but not even close to people like Kalim for example. Ortho even has his own cynical moments and douchy moments that people also tend to ignore. But even if he was 100% optimistic and naïve, it still would not be a valid reason to infantilise him. And you are absolutely right, people do that a lot. With Kalim too, actually, now that I think about it.

Anonymous asked:

Aaaaah, Ryuichi, after reading your post (rant) about Ortho, made me very happy! I'm glad there's someone else who shares the same opinion. The number of fans who infantilizes Ortho is beyond me. I absolutely hate the argument Ortho's mentally "8 years old" it's like they completely forget his storyline.

I'm guessing that the people who genuinely believe the theory that he's "8 years old" are younger fans with no media literacy so no hate towards them but it's frustrating when fans pretend it's Canon when it's not.

Not only that but it’s so sad to see how he's also so mischaracterized by the fandom. He's always seen just as Idia's little brother but never himself despite the fact that Ortho's life doesn't revolve around Idia. He has his own interest and hobbies different from Idia AND he is NOT innocent! Fans tend to forget this is a game about a school full of villains and that includes Ortho too! If I remember correctly Ortho has multiple times tried to blow up the school with his laser! He's violent! He's not a kid.

Unfortunately, I've seen this kind of stuff happening across all fandoms this isn't exclusive to Twisted wonderland. Heck a few months ago I've seen fans in the black butler genuinely believe that Ciel's in fact 9 years old instead of 13 year old!? And then they call us weird? The SebaCiel shippers? Like why do YOU want him to be younger?? I'm getting too old for this.

Thank you so much, Anon! I am happy you also agree.

I don’t hate younger fans, and I know that some people might be genuinely confused; but I also believe that there are a lot of people that simply do not care about Ortho’s actual story and any arguments one could make about this case. The actual issue isn’t Ortho being a certain age, it’s a pretext, an excuse, an invitation to harass. If Ortho didn’t exist, they would still do it with other characters, and even if all the characters were adults, they would still find a reason to do so, like, for example, their appearance. There is no winning in this game, this is why factual arguments won’t work even if Ortho Shroud himself looks in the camera and says “hi, I don’t care if people ship me with my niisan, I am also in fact not 8 years old”.

I am also very glad you mentioned Ortho being his own person! I mentioned it in a previous reply, so I won’t talk about it, but yes, you are absolutely right. Ortho is a menace, and all of his disappointed “come ooon, niisan, don’t do that” moments come from his desire for Idia to have more friends, not because he genuinely cares for other people. He clearly doesn’t – hence his multiple attempts to blow up the school lol

I love it when characters just keep getting younger with every single wave of this shitstorm. Didn’t you know he is 13? How dare you post something like that about a 9 years old! He is a toddler who is only 3 months old! That’s one powerful fountain of youth right there. Antis in Kuroshitsuji fandom do that a lot, just as antis in TWST fandom.

Anonymous asked:

I really feel bad for people who have Ortho as their oshi. It's not like fans of other characters don't get shit on too, apparently pretty much everyone is an immoral heathen these days, but I feel like Ortho gets often excluded in fan content, especially when it features any mature theme.

Also, if you a problem with people liking Ortho in the same way as they do with the rest of the guys, you should take your issues to the creators, since that was definitely their intention when they put him in the pretty boy gacha. Or maybe just play another game.

Anyway Ryu and Katsu, keep doing your thing, cause you guys are awesome!

What I love about it is that Ortho himself would be so pissed if he learned that all the other guys get to do fun mature stuff and he doesn’t lol That’s so not fair, he’s charging his lasers as we speak!

Also yes, it was absolutely the creators’ intention. He is supposed to look like that, just like Lilia is supposed to look like that – both caused confusion in the game story with how young they look, and yet both are a big part of the cast (+ As we know, even Idia was supposed to be younger looking…). Ortho has one of the biggest amounts of cards, he is clearly a popular character, not just a lovely addition or a mascot. 

Thank you so much for your support, Anon <3 It means a lot. This shit might be upsetting, but it will never stop us from creating.

Anonymous asked:

While I am not an Ortho/Idia shipper, I do like your art pieces because your art style is straight-up gorgeous. So when I do see your Shroudcest art Im like: not my cup of tea but I respect the time and effort made into this. (And here is my rant siding with you bc they are fictional characters)

The babyfication of Ortho is something I do not understand. As much as Idia made RoBro in trauma, rn I doubt he wants RoBro to remain stagnant in mind and hardware. With Ortho's ability to learn, he is practically a teenager like the rest. He displays more emotional maturity than most ppl despite his killer laser beam. Kindness, hope, and optimism are traits not limited to children. Shortness is also not limited to children. If we treat other characters by traits often shared by children, then Neige's fellow dwarf classmates are also children. What they don't count bc they are not human? Ortho is not human either. Similarly, Kalim and Silver display positive internal traits of kindness, hope, and optimism. Shortness? Well, we got Grandpa Lilia and the Napoleon complex twins Riddle and Epel. They are all teenagers (minus Lilia) and no one is babying them.

...And are we ignoring all the shit he has seen on the internet. The amount of porn (from adult sites and even the soft-core types you can even find by watching some twitch/yt streamers) that can be seen. Videos of violence, crimes, and ppl doing their best to win the Darwainism Award. Ortho could access and go through like 5 terebytes by the time I reach page two of Google.

As for the Shroudcest, they are fictional characters! You can go straight to phub and have incest type (the sheer amount of the step family porn troupe) porn being acted out by actual breathing people. Do you want to metaphorically die on this hill of ppl shipping fictional 2D characters? Are we just going to ignore you targeting this harmless ship? At least go for a larger target like Game of Thrones or House of Dragons. So much incest in those media that it has it's own fan wiki page, but you don't see ppl go for George R. R. Martin's throat for writing about characters willing or unknowingly committing incest.

It is like people reading/watching media of horror movie killers. It's something you can enjoy or have a preference for because you, as a sane person, will not become a serial killer. AND, as a productive member of society, you condemn actual, real-life serial killers. You read horror stories or watch scary movies for entertainment value not for a guide to be one. Similar logic to furries. Furries consider anthropomorphic creatures as hot, but those same furries are against beastilaity.

TL;DR: While I am not personally a fan of incest or shota type of media, I do not mind they exist (or go after creators who use FICTIONALLY characters to enhance their form of FICTIONAL media), bc they are FICTIONAL CHARACTERS from a FICTIONAL MEDIA. Stop with the performative activism. Use that effort and go after people who do it for real in real life. If you prevent/stop an actual crime from happening, I will applaud and thank you! AND I DOUBT I WILL BE THE ONLY ONE.

Thank you so much, Anon! I am happy that you like my stuff despite not shipping some of our ships. I am very grateful for the respect, and also for your message! I really like your points and I’ll go through them briefly.

The entire part about all those traits not being exclusive to children + about other characters having those traits but still not being babied – YES, thank you so much for that. Like I already mentioned, the game clearly plays with those tropes, and even though the characters are young-looking, they are still of high school age (other than Lilia). Ortho is weird, Ortho is different from some of the other boys, but all of them are weird in their own way, Ortho is just a robot. If we can make “not a human” excuse for the dwarves, why can’t we look at Ortho that way? And yes, Ortho absolutely knows stuff a kid wouldn’t be able to digest lol All of his difficulties come from him being an AI – he doesn’t always get sarcasm, he doesn’t fully understand why people do certain things and doesn’t understand some limitations of human’s body and mind; none of it is tied to him being childish or too innocent.

Incest in media is very popular indeed, and it’s SUPER popular in porn! You are right. If any kind of media ends up “normalising” this kind of relationship, it definitely won’t be shippers of incest. But also that won’t happen because wow, it doesn’t work that way. People love to say that fiction affects reality, and while in a way it does, it’s never a “everyone is going to start shooting people because the videogames brainwashed them” type of deal, and this is exactly what they’re doing with their arguments. It’s fear-mongering, moralism and ignoring the fact that people do in fact know how to separate fiction from reality. And the key to making sure no one is going to jump out the window because their favourite character did so isn’t in censorship, but in people learning this difference and always keeping in it mind. Ironically, that would mean that people who harass others over cartoons can’t make this separation very well because of their lack of critical consumption of media; but then again, they can’t even see (and don’t care, which makes it worse and my point stronger) how their own reckless actions seriously affect real people in real life, and I think this is a more important issue to resolve lol

Unfortunately, people who prefer performative activism very rarely end up becoming real activists, but I do hope that they will at least find some other hobby, something that doesn’t cause so much harm to both innocent people and the cause they claim to be fighting for.

I got a bit carried away there, but yeah, I totally agree with your point, and once again grateful for your understanding. There will always be media that makes you uncomfortable – and that’s the beauty of it. Creativity is a boundless ocean and no amount of bricks can contain it.

Anonymous asked:

I was just scrolling through and saw your explanation of ortho and shroudcest the other day. As tiring as I’m sure it is, it always gives me hope to see people who remember what shipping is really about. I mean problematic content has existed all through human mythos and history, and society still survives! According to the studies the “art morality” argument is roughly the same as “but da violent games!!” Argument, or metal music, or clothes, or any other form of media deemed ‘new’ or ‘too different’.

Anyway, I don’t ship cest stuff myself but your art is lovely and it’s become one of the things I can view without feeling uncomfy despite how my head usually responds to such content (woohoo free therapy??? /j)

I ship ortho with an OC who’s also 16. Said oc’s mother said she would never treat her child differently for who they choose to love, and while she definitely wasn’t expecting a robot, she’s not going back on her word.

Thank you so much, Anon!! YES, this is exactly what shipping is all about! It feels like “umm but they’re not even canon” type of people are suddenly the majority in fandom spaces ahhh lol

As long as art exists, there will always be people who are against it, especially if it’s something niche, and despite how popular fandoms are, all of the fandom activity is a niche, ESPECIALLY shipping, ESPECIALLY this kind of shipping. So unfortunately it’s unavoidable, but it’s so useless and annoying!

I am very happy that you like our stuff. Thank you for enjoying it. Your OC’s mother is amazing and very supportive lol I am sure she and Ortho will get along swimmingly.

[mosviqu]

❄️🎄❄️ moot game ❄️🎄❄️- hi baby,, assign some romantic tropes to your moots + explain why

i totally forgot i had this in my inbox and a moot just answered this ask so i am reminded of it once again HAHA. only did the moots i am the closest to <3

@satoruly - miri is found family (i would say soulmates au too, but i wont be that cheesy.). you meet and her and you instantly click. she knows your soul and connects with it, makes you feel safe, makes you feel understood. your sense of humor is the same and you never thought you'd be blessed to have someone like her in your life, but it happens and you always thank whoever is up there for bringing her into your life. she is like laughting until you cry, like tending to each other's wounds, like listening to long voice memos and feeling so at peace and in tune with someone that you wonder how the universe works so well that there is someone out there that is truly your best friend, no questions asked and no doubts felt

@csenke - now come on there is no way i am not giving csenge neighbors au (slash childhood friends au). we are platonic neighbors because we live in bordering countries and i felt strangely so at home in budapest but other than that,, she is just that type of person you feel like you've known forever. the person you go on walks with and spend most afternoons with and have similar interests with because you are the same age and you grew up together and you feel so carefree with them and they know you so well. she is like evening walks during summer break and like catching the bus and going on a little road trip and like playing in playgrounds and she is like laughter and being silly and being only a house away and everything is good because you know that when you come back from whatever journey u went on, your neighbor, your childhood friend, will always wait there for you.

@from-izzy - izzy is coming of age. she is like sharing struggles and growing up, she is like finding yourself and overcoming trouble, she is all late night talks and rants, she is confessions and fun and inside jokes and being loyal and protective of your loved ones, she is finding your favorite person and being glued to them in the halls of the school cafeteria, she is that kind of person they ask you "have you been friends since childhood?" about, but you reply that no, it hasnt been that long, you just click so well. she is like staring in the mirror and seeing yourself in another person. she is like mourning your childhood and the thrill of growing up. she is like wiping your cheeks off tears and staying strong even on your lowest. its like having a companion by your side even when u feel like youre all alone in the world.

@sanaxo-o - sana is idiots to lovers. two people who are in love with each other, but too oblivious and dumb to realize it. she is all silly acts and blushing cheeks and chaotic energy that makes you question the nature of the relationship. she is all caring and sweet and genuine and over-all besties vibes. it takes a while to figure out your feelings, but u get to it eventually.

@okkotsu-simp - kyuzu is first love au. my innocent sweet little sister i need to protect at all times. she is shy glances and rosy cheeks and lovesick hearts and screaming over the boy you like. she is like freedom and fun and all the pure things in the world in my eyes. that type that makes u wanna squish their cheeks and give them a forehead kiss.

@injangism - is academic rivals to lovers au. that type where you argue (not that we ever did) and go after each others throat, but u secretly admire them for their big brain and their strengths and their smarts and the determination. you admire them from afar but would never admit it because words are too embarrassing, so getting to their level is what you do to make them notice you. and then u realize the sexual tension and it all ends well<3

@sungbeam - beam is college au acquaintances to lovers. she is that person u know through mutual friends, that person you somehow end up talking to and still question how it even happened. u meet in college and click over the same struggles and interests and the similar way you two think, you click over deep talks in the lonely bedroom of a house party, or the person that follows you out of the bars on your smoke break. she is like your study partner during exam season u lose sanity with, someone u secretly admire, and somehow find growing closer to. she is like the mature girl u meet in college and then realize she is younger than you and you slowly start questioning the state of your developing front lobe.

@koishua - vie is right person, wrong time. i know it sounds depressing, but hear me out. vie is like watching the person you have always loved from afar. she is making you reflect on who you were and who you are now, she is the person that got away but you keep thinking about in hopes that they're okay and happy. she is that person you stalk on insta and feel proud of, wishing them well, despite not crossing your paths with them. and im not saying we no longer have the same path, i just think your tumblr hiatus left a scar on me 💔💔 i love you always vie, u are like my mature younger sister. you make me think of just how fast time flies. also ur whole existence is so poetic to me.

[easyxringo]

I never allowed myself to believe that cheating wouldn't, at some point, be thrown at them it's too easy of a soap trope to avoid and the more popular the couple the more likely a soap is to do it. It's gross but it's a soap go to and always has been. Making the character who identifies as bi be the one who cheats is what I find most disturbing. The truth is COVID messed up most soap couples so throwing a storyline at them that forces a reset is, in theory, not a terrible idea. Making it Ringo is the bigger cop out. Easy has not been a good husband, or written anything like himself (seriously the writing for him has been WTF), for over a year now. He has been entirely wrapped up in his own wants and desires, and completely tunes out Ringo a lot of the time, and there has been more than one occasion where Ringo had genuine reason to be hurt/angry with him. But he was never allowed to feel that way for more than a few scenes so nothing ever got resolved. Having Easy be the one who cheats would be the much more interesting angle to take, and with the way he's been written this past year it wouldn't have been as out of character as it once would have been. Making it the bi character, and the character the audience always sees cast in the role of "bad guy" to his husbands "good guy" is the grossest most played out part of the whole thing. There was a way to do this and maybe make it not terrible from a storyline perspective, from a fan perspective it was always going to hurt and feel cruel. Also having no idea how long the break up is planned to last makes it worse.

Okay, so we… do not agree.

I don’t think that Easy is a bad husband, not at all. Especially during the prison-arc he was 100% supportive and we even got a little bit of evil-Easy. He trusted Ringo, he tried to save his family, that doesn’t make him a bad husband.

Unfortunately Ringo seems to be unable to clearly communicate about what he wants. So he lies. While I do understand that he wanted revenge. yet he lied – again. That Easy wanted to protect Maya – an innocent child just like Julius – is not a bad thing. The supposedly good person who acted very shabby in this whole thing was Ute. Again, I understand that Ringo wanted revenge, I would have wanted that too, but again – he lied.

When Julius no longer wanted to be adopted because of Ringo's name change and felt betrayed, Easy even tried to relieve his husband's feelings of guilt, since he had started poisoning Benedikt.

Not that I think Easy doesn’t make mistakes, he does.

What I do agree is that the writing for Easy is very lame lately. He doesn’t have anything to do, yet he was not involved in finding his best friend when he was kidnapped. Lame, just super super lame. Also the fact that they kinda start to build up “friendship“ with Cecilia is disgusting.

If the cheating means that Easy can finally thrive and no longer have to play suggestion-box for everyone, I'm all for it. And I expect them to give him the best Prince Charming the soap world has ever seen. I don't want to see him cry all the time! He deserves more and better.

I would have loved to see him falling for someone new, absolutely. Not forever, no, but just to show Richard that there is more in live tha Huber Bau. I’m honest, I have more trust in Easy and his decissions than in Richard.

And be sure that I will NOT watch a single scene between Richard and Cecilia. He is out of my view the second he starts fucking her.

[aion-rsa]

The 21 Best Christmas Horror Movies

https://ift.tt/3lZGPFt

Technicolor lights are about to illuminate every other home in the neighborhood; carolers are marching through the streets; even that old tree in Rockefeller is shining brightly.

For some folks, that’s enough to make you want to grab an axe. But don’t do that. Watch demented men dressed as Santa Claus or a demon Krampus indulge your Anti-Christmas sentiments with maximum gore. Indeed, this list isn’t about the most charming, heartwarming, or schmaltzy Christmas viewing traditions. Nah, this is about the 20 grossest, nastiest, and all around most fun Christmas horror movies. The kind where the greatest gift you’re going to get on Christmas morning is escaping with your life and maybe some psychological triggers whenever you see jolly men in red suits.

Yep, these are the very best Christmas horror movies. Ho. Freaking. Ho.

Anna and the Apocalypse (2017)

Almost certainly one of the sweetest, most positive, and upbeat Christmas movies on the list is this wonderful feel good musical romance from director John McPhail, which also happens to be a zombie movie. It follows a group of friends in a small Scottish town who are just about to finish school and are making plans for the future when a zombie outbreak lands. 

Incredibly catchy tunes which take inspiration from Buffy musical episode Once More With Feeling, mix with inventive festive kills – zombie snowman decapitation is a highlight – in a way that manages not to tonally jar. It’s mostly thanks to the super-likeable performances of the young cast, headed up by Ella Hunt, and the teenage troubles, romances, and heartbreak which form the backdrop of the movie. Paul Kaye also pops up as the school’s tyrannical headmaster – his musical numbers aren’t the best but he brings cartoon villain energy to an unusual but rather adorable Christmas horror that’s way better than you might expect.

– Rosie Fletcher

Better Watch Out (2016)

Home Alone is surely one of the most popular and iconic Christmas movies of all time, though it is not, of course, a horror. However, if it was, it would look something like Better Watch Out, a slick reinvention of the home invasion sub-genre. Olivia DeJonge plays babysitter Ashley, who attempts to protect her charge, 12-year-old Luke (Levi Miller), when they are threatened by intruders in his home. But all is not as it seems.

DeJonge and Miller spar beautifully in a movie which plays with gender and coming of age tropes and includes handfuls of gruesome set pieces, while Ed Oxenbould brings comic relief. This is clever, funny and gruesome stuff from director Chris Peckover which might not become a new Christmas tradition but should definitely be watched at least once.

– Rosie Fletcher

Black Christmas (1974)

Getting stabbed by a unicorn head to the tune of carolers singing “Silent Night” is probably not how you want to spend Christmas Eve. This pre-Scream holiday slasher claims its victims in a sorority house haunted by creepy phone calls (sans ghost mask), demonic noises, bodies eerily shrouded in plastic wrap, and one perverse killer whose voice alone is enough to freeze your blood.

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When an unidentified caller keeps harassing your entire sorority house with obscene things you can only half-understand (because he sounds like a deranged Donald Duck that laughs like the Joker), you should run even if it is 10 degrees outside. The blizzard of murders keeps raging with one victim dragged screaming by a hook, and another bludgeoned to death. Never mind the one suffocated by plastic wrap and left next to the window like the vacant face of a doll staring out into the night. You’ll hardly sleep in heavenly peace after this one.

– Elizabeth Rayne 

Christmas Evil (aka You Better Watch Out) (1980)

In his one and only film as writer/director, Lewis Jackson crafted a smart and clever black comedy that’s more character study than straight horror film. John Waters insists it’s a comedy about a closeted transvestite (of a sort), but it’s much more than that—it’s the Taxi Driver of Yuletide shockers. Brandon Maggart plays a man who takes Christmas way too seriously. His home is filled with bright holiday decorations all year-round while Christmas carols are playing on the stereo. Santa is his role model, a symbol of all that is good and just in the world. He even works at a toy factory.

He so identifies with Santa, he takes to spying on the neighbor kids, keeping his own carefully annotated naughty and nice lists. But when he recognizes the level of cynicism and hypocrisy among his co-workers, bosses, and the people around town as the most joyous time of the year approaches, well, he goes a little funny in the head. He reaches for the suit and beard and axe, determined to reward the good and punish the evil.

Maggart has since tried to desperately distance himself from the film, but he gives a remarkable performance here as a completely isolated figure with a head swimming with both joy and rage. In the end, the film remains king of the sub-subgenre. Screw It’s a Wonderful Life and Rudolph. Apart from Blast of Silence and Invasion U.S.A., Christmas Evil is the only holiday film I watch annually.

– Jim Knipfel 

A Christmas Horror Story (2015)

Admittedly, a number of horror-based Christmas movie have gone with the anthology angle for their storytelling. Hell, this isn’t even the only anthology film on this list. A Christmas Horror Story may not be on a lot of people’s radar, but it’s a worthy installment that goes to some unusual places purely because both the Christmas and anthology playgrounds have gotten so bloated at this point. This film also benefits from being executed by a cabal of directors who are responsible for directing some of the best horror movies to come out of Canada in passing years, such as Splice, the Black Christmas remake, and the Ginger Snaps trilogy.

A Christmas Horror Story deliciously uses a radio DJ (William Shatner) as the connective tissue that holds together the four stories that comprise the film. Parables on ghost possession, clone doppelgangers, Krampus, and zombie elves all get their due here. The film also has a pretty inspired ending that actually casts the picture in a whole new light. It’s got Santa Claus fighting Krampus. What’s not to like?

– Daniel Kurland 

Dead of Night (1945)

Never play hide and go seek in a house where someone was murdered. While it might be best known for Michael Redgrave’s night-terror-inducing ventriloquist dummy scene that sparked the phobia of possessed puppets, Dead of Night also invites you to a Christmas party with a spectral guest. Spacecase Sally’s genuine terror at realizing what she thinks she saw is what she really saw will forever have you second-guessing shadows creeping in the cold. 

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What is obvious in this scene—encroaching darkness and shadows looming over what a place you know is haunted without ever having to hear the big reveal—is hardly as chilling as what is not so obvious until the truth silently materializes. The ghost of the little boy plays hide-and-seek with the other children as if warm blood courses through his veins. Unlike many stereotypical see-through phantoms of the era, this one doesn’t have that telltale translucence which would set off a chorus of screams. Being almost disturbingly normal is exactly what makes him so terrifying. 

– Elizabeth Rayne 

Eyes Wide Shut (1999)

Eyes Wide Shut was the non-denominational star at the top of Stanley Kubrick’s Christmas tree. Originally conceived as a Woody Allen vehicle, it almost starred Steve Martin after Allen insisted on reading the script from right to left. It is as much a cautionary tale as Dickens’ A Christmas Carol, bringing the whole family together with a different Christmas tree in almost every frame.  

Kubrick pours on the cheer from the opening sequence at the Christmas party where the first gifts are unwrapped, and oh boy are they unwrapped. Bill Harford, played by Tom Cruise, dives right into the muffled spirit of giving after he performs a more than charitable deed for the party’s host, played by Sydney Pollack.

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A24 Horror Movies Ranked From Worst to Best

By David Crow and 3 others

Harford spends most of the film looking for the perfect gift like a slow motion version of Jingle All the Way, rushing around from New York City’s famous toy repository FAO Schwartz to downtown specialty shops, to the suburbs, where he can find collectors’ editions. Cruise pays Harford like a wooden windup toy, and not a particularly cute one, either. In spite of all the colorful lights and trips above and below the rainbow, Harford just can’t get into the Christmas spirit. He’s not even moved by the uplifting seasonal tunings of “I Want a Boy for Christmas” by the Del-Vettes. He recovers his seasonal facilities while humming along to the chant during the climactic illuminati sex party, though! The song is actually “Here Comes Santa Claus” sung backwards in Latin, adding more menace to the proceedings than Silas Barnaby brought to Toyland in The March of the Wooden Soldiers.

– Tony Sokol 

Gremlins (1984)

Santa doesn’t exist… unless it’s your father in a red suit who met his untimely end trying to slide down the chimney with a sack of presents before getting stuck. Don’t tell that to the innocent bat-like ears of a harmless (for now) Mogwai. It’s exactly the kind of story you expect to hear while hunkering down in the shadows with a flashlight while a bunch of leathery green things with too many teeth ransack the neighborhood.

And as for Santa? That smell coming from the fireplace weeks later was no dead cat. Worst. Christmas story. Ever. 

Read more

Movies

Why Gremlins 2 Is Better Than the Original

By David Crow

Movies

20 Christmas Movies for Badasses

By Michael Reed

This movie should be on every hardcore horror fan’s holiday playlist just for the musical monstrosity of those reptilian things decked out in Santa hats and earmuffs singing “Deck the Halls” at the neighbors’ door, sheet music and all. This is continuing proof that animals have a sixth sense, because her yowling cat senses something off about the voices warbling “Joy to the World” outside. She’s right to have an aversion to Christmas carolers.

– Elizabeth Rayne 

Holidays (2015)

There have been so many holiday-themed horror films at this point—reaching Christmas and going far, far beyond that—so why not make an anthology film that takes that idea to the extreme? Holidays hits the expected staples such as Christmas, Halloween, and Valentine’s Day, but part of the fun here is how holidays with lesser expectations like Easter or St. Patrick’s Day deliver some truly horrifying content (seriously, the St. Patrick’s Day segment is disturbing, bonkers chaos).

The Christmas segment comes courtesy of Scott Stewart (Legion) and has Seth Green trying to survive the holiday as he attempts to get his son the perfect gift. Stewart’s installment feels very reminiscent of a Black Mirror episode with virtual reality, consumerism, and the dangers of mob mentality all playing their part here.

A lot of these anthology films also try to bank off of the name recognition and notoriety of the assembled directors, but Holidays proudly features a collection of mostly fresh faces (although Kevin Smith and Starry Eye’s Kevin Kolsch contribute segments). It’s fun to discover a bunch of new blossoming talents here.

– Daniel Kurland 

Jack Frost (1997)

This ain’t the cringeworthy father/son bonding vehicle starring Michael Keaton. No, this is the Jack Frost where the killer snowman’s nose functions as both a killing tool and a device to sexually assault his victims. All square? But hey, at the least the film isn’t afraid to ride its ridiculous premise as hard as possible.

First of all, an actual killer named Jack Frost crashes into a truck of “genetics material” that causes him to transform into this cold abomination in the first place. That sets the tone pretty nicely for the abundant murders, sex, and plot holes that plague the town of Snowmonton (yup). It’s hard to believe that this film got made, with all of the visuals being some real spectacles that you don’t typically see in the horror genre.

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Sponsored

Hasbro Gift Guide: Best Hasbro Toys, Action Figures, and Games for the Holidays

By Chris Cummins

Movies

The 16 Best Winter Horror Movies

By Daniel Kurland and 3 others

Jack Frost is the perfect Christmas horror film to shut your brain off and watch, or the title that you should be selecting right in the middle of your deep eggnog haze. It’s utter nonsense, but it knows that it is and has tons of fun with itself. We need more talented individuals trying to tap into the killer snowman subgenre. There’s still a true classic waiting to come to life here.

– Daniel Kurland 

Krampus (2015)

Morbidly funny in its anti-holiday sarcasm and ridiculous demons, Krampus is like a mashup of the Griswolds, the Grinch, and every mythical beast that has ever been rumored to devour children on the naughty list. You’d rather get coal in your stocking than a killer jack-in-the-box jump scare… or find chilling hoof prints in the snow that are definitely not from Rudolph.

Krampus is one Yuletide monster actually worse than the Grinch. The grisly inspiration for this tale is a Germanic one about a hairy, horned, and cloven-hooved demon who stuffs naughty children in his sack and either beats them with a wooden switch or eats them (depending on who you ask). Also, his heart won’t grow three sizes from gorging on human flesh, either.

This version of Krampus is also hungry for anyone who’s lost their holiday spirit—whether or not you otherwise qualify for the nice list. Watch this with the lights off for the full effect of the power outage that works to the creature’s advantage as he goes hunting for holiday nonbelievers. Kids, don’t scorn Santa or Krampus will come to collect you.

– Elizabeth Rayne 

The Nightmare Before Christmas (1993)

There are some of us who know this movie verbatim and to the point where we will shamelessly break out singing “This is Halloween” and raise Jack’s quasi-Shakespearean monologue from the dead even in the middle of July. Or keep warning people that tragedy’s at hand. Or correct anyone who says there are 365 days until next Halloween by growling “364!” The stop-motion animation saga of the talking skeleton turned “Sandy Claws” bewitched an entire generation of ‘90s kids. 

Even people who hate Halloween will stare with delight and awe when Jack’s skull bursts out of a snowdrift, and he first puts colored lights in his eye sockets and explores every “what’s this?” in Christmas Town like a spook in a coffin shop. You just can’t help but love the adventurous skeleton, even if he does end up making haunted houses out of people’s living rooms on Christmas Eve. Whether you’d rather be making Christmas with strangely somber carols, reanimated reindeer or toys that bite back, it’s now an officially unofficial holiday classic.

– Elizabeth Rayne 

P2 (2007)

On the sillier end of the Christmas horror spectrum comes P2, a film named after a section in a parking lot, starring Wes Bentley and Rachel Nichols. She’s a business woman trapped in a multi-story parking garage on Christmas Eve, he’s the insane Security Guard who’s obsessed with her and really wants her to try his festive eggnog, so to speak. 

Camp and gory, this is the directorial debut of Franck Khalfoun who would follow it up with a remake of Maniac. The movie was co-written by Alexandre Aja who made one of the greatest cat-and-mousers ever in Switchblade Romance. The set up is formulaic, perhaps, but the game performances and relentlessness of the action makes this worthwhile. And if that’s not enough check out a deranged Bentley dressed as Santa, for the angel on the top of the Christmas tree.

– Rosie Fletcher

Rare Exports (2010)

There couldn’t possibly be a more sinister place to search for Santa’s ancient burial mound than in the frigid depths of Lapland. It’s the same supposedly enchanted place Dick van Dyke hiked to in the search for Santa in an ‘80s musical Christmas special, except this time you won’t find him in a cozy cottage with stockings hung by the chimney with care. You won’t find the guy in red from the mall, but anything that takes a disembodied pig’s head as bait couldn’t possibly be jingle-belling on a sleigh with eight tiny reindeer, especially when he seems to have a ravenous appetite for said reindeer. 

This time, “the spirit of the season” is literally the most malicious Christmas spirit that has ever terrorized the Yuletide. Even if you watch the whole thing in Finnish and don’t understand a word except the screaming, the ghost of the child in you that really did believe there was a guy in the North Pole will be forever traumatized. This glaze-eyed zombie incarnation of Mr. Claus doesn’t laugh like a bowl full of jelly. You better watch out, indeed.

– Elizabeth Rayne

Santa Claws (1996)

You do have to wonder what happened to John Russo along the line. 30 years after co-writing Night of the Living Dead, he came up with this decidedly sleazy but sadly unoriginal wonderment, which was much more focused on boobs than Yuletide butchery. In what by that point had become a battered cliché of the Slasher Santa subgenre, a young boy named Wayne (Grant Kramer) sees his mom having sex with a man wearing a Santa hat (!), and so murders them both. I’m not exactly sure how this transference would work in Freudian terms, but when he gets older, he a) becomes obsessed with a low-budget scream queen named Raven (played by low-budget scream queen Debbie Rochon) and b) decides he’s Santa.

As you might imagine, stalking someone when you’re wearing a Santa suit is no mean feat, but Wayne gives it his best shot. Most of the film, however, focuses on Raven and her extended family as she gets undressed a lot and wonders not only why that creep in the Santa suit keeps showing up everywhere, but why everyone around her keeps dying in a particularly bloody fashion. It can feel like there are two films going on here, a by-the-numbers stalker/slasher movie and a holiday horror film, which leaves me thinking Russo had one of them in mind, but after some eight-year-old smarty-pants came up with that clever “Santa Claws” pun, well, he just had to run with it.

– Jim Knipfel

Santa’s Slay (2005)

Christmas can sure scare the Dickens out of people. Hence why you can’t not watch a holiday horror flick in which Santa is the Antichrist, sentenced to 1,000 years of delivering gifts after losing a curling match with an angel, and played by former pro wrestler Bill “Who’s Next?” Goldberg.

As the only son of Satan (you know what they say about rearranging the letters in that name) whose grim legend is immortalized in the Book of Claus, he can now at last spread Christmas fear with weapons, karate kicks, hand grenades, exploding presents, and his own perverse idea of what “Ho ho ho” should really mean. Them’s the breaks once the bet’s terms are done.

Read more

Movies

MST3K: A Christmas Episodes Guide for Mystery Science Theater 3000

By Gavin Jasper

TV

Christmas in The Twilight Zone: Revisiting Night of the Meek

By Arlen Schumer

Santa’s methods of murder are fiendishly festive—to say the least. There is no naughty or nice list when it comes to an insatiable appetite for violence. He even knocks out poseurs in red suits and drives a sleigh with a rocket engine like it’s the Batmobile. Mall Santas everywhere are shaking in their pleather boots.

– Elizabeth Rayne 

Silent Night, Deadly Night (1984)

Naughty children get punished with more than just a stocking full of coal in this Christmas chiller. Just the opening scene with all those empty-eyed animatronic toys haunting a window display after-hours should tell you that this is not a movie that’s going to end in visions of sugarplums. Forget that it’s supposed to be the season of all things magical. Those things can be more terrifying than every single plastic skeleton and gaping zombie mask you’ll ever see in a haunted house around Halloween.

You’d better watch out for that psycho in the red suit who grabs a hatchet off the wall as if it was his bag full of toys and packs an automatic pistol in his fur-lined pocket, murdering misbehaving kids he’s been watching undercover of shadow. This sadistic Santa clearly doesn’t believe in sliding down chimneys—and the only red he’s interested in wearing is the blood of innocents. If that won’t convince you to stay awake because he sees you when you’re sleeping, you must be Freddie Krueger.

– Elizabeth Rayne

Silent Night, Deadly Night Part 2 (1987)

Three years after the shit-storm sparked by the original’s ad campaign, some smart cookie decided a sequel was necessary. A tough call there, given most all the principals were killed off pretty thoroughly the first time around, but still, right?

But there was money to be made, so they brought in an untested director (Lee Harry), a mostly untested crew, and a cast of mostly non-professional actors. After a half-dozen writers took a swipe at the script, they came up with a confounding but tepid rehash of the first film. This time around, and mostly in flashback, we learn that after the first killer Santa was sloppily dispatched at the end of Part 1, his brother Ricky becomes determined to uncover what went wrong.

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Movies

9 Jolly Santa Slasher Movies

By Jim Knipfel

TV

100 Best Christmas TV Episodes of All Time

By Wesley Mead

He pays a visit to the sadistic Mother Superior at the Catholic asylum where his brother had been kept, and before you can say “ho ho ho,” Ricky ends up donning the red and white suit himself to do a little rampaging, though without nearly half of his brother’s imagination. They even used the same fucking poster design, just slapped a “2” on it. I guess hoping they might raise the same sort of ruckus the first one had. Sadly, it was too late for that.

– Jim Knipfel 

Sint (2010)

Dutch director Dick Maas took some early steps toward Krampus territory with his re-imagining of the legend of the warm-hearted Saint Nick. Borrowing heavily from earlier Italian, Spanish, and American horror films, as well as Danish folklore, “Sinterklaas” here was actually a bloodthirsty medieval murderer and all around brute who oversaw a savage reign of terror. Finally fed up with all his nonsense, the ornery local villagers banded together on the night of Dec. 5 and lynched him. As per tradition, however, in the moments before he died Sinterklaas vowed vengeance from beyond the grave, promising to return every 32 years on that very night to do bad and icky things to the villagers’ descendants.

Over the centuries, the story was mainstreamed and soft-pedaled, becoming part of the local folklore. The character of Saint Nick became much more benevolent and child-friendly so as not to scare the wee folk. Then, well, wouldn’t you know it? That anniversary creeps around again, Sinterklaas is true to his word, and Amsterdam turns all bloody, leaving it up to an intrepid teenager named Frank to put a stop to the mayhem.

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Movies

The Best Christmas Movie Soundtracks of All Time

By Ivan Radford

TV

The Twilight Zone Marathon: A History of a Holiday Tradition

By Arlen Schumer

A stylish, wicked, and hugely entertaining take on the darker history of a beloved legend. It was also the top grossing film in Denmark in 2010, which either says something about the Danish film industry or the Dutch themselves.

– Jim Knipfel

Tales From the Crypt: And All Through the House (1972)

The Crypt Keeper first emerged as a ghoulish EC Comics horror host in the pages of Tales From the Crypt who crawled onto the big screen in this horror anthology, welcoming unknowing tourists to his catacombs with bony arms open. What the tourists don’t know is that they’re all recently deceased. The invite is to a subterranean story-time in which he unearths the gruesome details of their deaths with a gap-toothed grin. Creatures are obviously stirring when killer wife Joanne is stalked by a homicidal Santa in this warped homage to ‘Twas the Night Before Christmas titled (appropriately enough) “… And All Through the House.”

So it is that “O Come All Ye Faithful” is interrupted while playing on the radio by a scratchy warning of a homicidal maniac run amok. And wouldn’t you just know it, this occurs right as Joan Collins is offing her husband with a shot to the head—and then realizes she has to dismember the body before cashing in on his life insurance. Her blissfully naïve daughter lets the killer jolly old elf in, shrieking that Santa finally came before he erupts into psychopathic rage. Clement C. Moore must be turning in his grave.

– Elizabeth Rayne 

The Wolf of Snow Hollow

Certainly less purely Christmas-y than other entries on this list, The Wolf of Snow Hollow is nonetheless a wintry delight set during the holiday season. Carols play ominously in the background during key moments, and the immaculately snowy white setting of Snow Hollow, Utah is broken only by splashes of color from lights on homes and Christmas trees. Oh yes, and the blood of the titular werewolf’s victims.

Read more

Movies

The Wolf of Snow Hollow Review: A Quirky Werewolf Movie

By Don Kaye

Movies

13 Must-See Werewolf Movies

By Mike Cecchini

Jim Cummings’ film is heavy on cozy, ski town holiday atmosphere without leaning on its actual Christmastime setting at all. But good werewolf movies are a rare breed indeed these days, and a werewolf movie set at Christmas? Well…now you know what to watch when the moon is full each December

Mike Cecchini

Got any other suggestions for Christmas horror movies that we missed? Let us know in the comments!

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The post The 21 Best Christmas Horror Movies appeared first on Den of Geek.

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[ohgygia]

been reading a lot of klance fics lately so i thought i’d share it w you guys!! here’s 14 of them and definitely my favorites. comes with the title (duh), description, a review by yours truly, and link to the fic. the writers of said fics also have some gorg other masterpieces so be sure to check those out!

1. ) Smile for the Stars by maIikcutie

description

Though he's been dealt many bad cards, Lance isn't sure he can handle this one: winding up stranded, a million lightyears away from home, with only Keith to keep him company. The universe is cruel.

review

amazing a+++ fic but i strongly advise not to read this unless you are willing to live the rest of your life broken hearted and Sad. i promise ur heart will be wrecked but in the best way possible!!! a buncha artists on tumblr made art for this so be sure to check those out & also there’s a epilogue-ish thing for this that dulls the pain a lil less and its called The Stars Smile Back in case yall were interested

2. ) Dirty Laundry by Gibslythe

description:

"Two whole months of free laundry in exchange for two weeks of being my fake boyfriend. Deal?” Keith hesitated for a moment. Was this really worth it? Hardly. Lance was an asshole, and he wasn’t sure what fake dating would entail. But, free laundry was free laundry, right? “Alright, it’s a deal.” Or: Lance makes the mistake of telling his Mom he has a boyfriend coming home with him for Christmas. Keith makes the mistake of agreeing to be Lance's 'fake boyfriend'.

review:

if u love slow burn then BOY ur gonna love this !!!! mama lance is so warm i luv her !!! fake dating aka one of my fav tropes so 11/10 and i just rly love this ok im in tears

3. ) call me, beep me by safra

description:

(00:31) Do you think she gave me the wrong number on purpose? (00:31) Or was it a genuine mistake? (00:32) Like maybe she writes funny and I misread it? (00:32) Some of the numbers do look a little dodgy... (00:33) Cause, you know, her threes couldvery easily be poorly formed eights? And maybe she writes her sevens like her ones? (00:45) What (00:46) The (00:46) Fuck?? (00:47) Oh good, you are awake! where lance messages the wrong number and things kind of snowball from there

review:

i love through-chat fics therefore i am so in love with this!!!!!! your everyday "wrong number" trope but so so so much better!!! cute and happy

4. ) Seasons by fairietailed

description: 

“Do you think we’ll be together, still, by the time we make it home?” Lance is quiet for a moment, thinking. Then he says, “That depends. Do you plan on going somewhere?” Keith laughs, threading his fingers through Lance’s hair. “No, I suppose I don’t.”

review:

their relationship is just SO PURE AND SOFT and so well written i'm in luuuv but the open ending will shatter and will most likely rip u apart

5. )  Don't Break Connection, Baby by princedeadend

description:

Keith works part-time as a phone sex operator and receives a prank call from Lance. This does not go as planned for Lance. Thus begins the adventure of our dear sweet idiot continuing to call Keith to fuck with him (but not like fuck fuck with him...at least not yet). And y'know, eventually having legit conversations with him and getting attached and growing on Keith. aka the phone sex operator fic no one asked for

review:

this is soooooooooo cute and adorable and wow i luv ittttt!!! made me smile so hard it hurts

6. ) He Who Fights Monsters by magisterpavus

description:

In a world where monstrous dragons terrorize humanity daily, the Garrison trains valiant Knights to slay the evil beasts and defend Earth. But when Knight cadet Lance Espinosa is kidnapped by a strange red dragon who kills its own kind, certain truths are revealed...and so are the true monsters.

review:

oh my god the buildup may be slow but i promise it's worth it like everything just falls perfectly into place !!! and its so adorable and creative and just wow not ur usual klance fanfic and that just makes it 1000x better and also,,, dragons !!

7. ) Bonding Time by magisterpavus

description:

“Shiro, I fucked up,” Keith blurted, wringing his hands. Shiro paused mid-punch, shooting him a quizzical look. “What? What happened?” “I think,” Keith whispered, “I think I accidentally roofied Lance. With my dick.”

review:

galra keith will always and forever be my fav au so this is a definite fav for me !!! i love the other 3 sequels it comes w too!! and nsfw content too dont even lie ik u guys are thirsty for that

8 .) Just Static by Jessadilla

description:

--Static---- -iro, Hunk, Kei---, nybody? I’m---- -static-- --I’m sorry guys. This is all my-- --static--cc-- ---I found my coordinates. They’re-- -stttcc- -guys. I hear something--- --scccc- -end transmission- Alone on a hostile planet, transmissions aren't getting through. How did it come to this?

review:

this fic got me sad and crying in the middle of the night )': wont leave u too sad tho the ending is pretty nice

9. ) What a Healing Pod Can't Repair by Remember_Me

description:

The compromised wormhole was ripping apart at the seams, sending everyone spiraling away in completely different directions. Lance could feel himself being pulled and bent in ways he was definitely not supposed to be. -- Stitching the team back together after everyone is separated is difficult, and for one Paladin rescue wouldn't be coming for a very long time.

review:

no words. literally no words. this was so painful and just wow the buildup will shatter u i swear )’: also poor bb lance i sob. comes with cool-looking art which makes it a whole lot better

10. ) Seen: 5:29 by SpeedOfSins

description:

AU where Keith is some important guy who has a business suit, and lance is a good housewife. (tha ts a lie, i honestly dont have a summary but this fic hurts, i have been told by at least 3 people) Written in text format

review:

will wreck u, beware!! may be short but enough to bring u to tears honestly

11. ) On Thin Ice by Minadora

description:

Once upon a time, two Canadian nerds decided to start a figure skating au about their two space sons and their wonderful misfit friends. Ten pages of headcanons later we finally put electronic pen to electronic paper and created this monstrosity. This multi-chapter fic chronicles the lives of a hockey player named Keith who gets forcibly enlisted into figure skating lessons by his brother, Shiro, to "work on his footwork". There he meets a pompous - yet talented - figure skater named Lance and gets swept away by both the sport and the skater. Enjoy the ride because it's only just started.

review:

the description says it all !!!!! a fic beloved by the vld fandom and gosh whats not to love honestly???? also the whole gang is so happy !!! (sidenote: this is unfinished and its killing me)

12. ) I bet you look good on the dancefloor by xShieru

description:

"So like in 'Step Up'?" Allura shrugs. "Now that you put it like that - yes. I guess it's just like in 'Step Up'." The smile that she sends Shiro's way - followed by a shy wave, eugh - is sickening to say the least, and Lance still doesn't believe in dance camps. - Lance McClain's dancing career begins and ends with Keith. Keith just wants to find out what Lance's deal is.

review:

if u love step up ur gonna LOVE this !!!! i love it so so so so much can i just say and wow keith is so hot ffs

13. ) thunderstruck by xShieru

description:

Lance doesn't pine for anyone ever, Keith's never been to a dance, Hunk tries his best to be supportive, Shiro is very done, and Pidge steals a car.But hey, it could've been worse.

review:

space prom!!!!!!! and cute pining gays!! whats not to love about that?

14. ) In English, Please

description:

Lance thinks he can get away with flirting with Keith if it's in Spanish. Lance thinks if he says the words angrily enough no one will catch on to the ruse. Lance thinks his secret crush is safe. Lance, my friends, is very...very wrong.

review:

two words - too. cute. i can't even with this fic

[puddingcatbeans]

fic rec days; hq edition.

i’m terrible at these things bc i kind of want to just slap all almost-300 of my ao3 bookmarks here but that’s cheating. i also feel like i haven’t read hq fics in so long omg, gotta rectify that. meanwhile, i hope you enjoy these works if you haven’t read them already, and if you have, i hope you let the writers know! 

under the cut, in no particular order, some hq fics i definitely rec!!

It’s Always You by @icespyders | bokuaka, rated g, college au

Akaashi meets a stranger at the school library. And then meets him again. (But it's only a coincidence.) And again. (But that's a coincidence, too. It has to be.) But as their paths keep crossing in the strangest ways, Akaashi has to wonder if it could mean something more. And, more importantly, if he wants it to.

// everyone knows i’m a sucker for college AUs but this 14k+ journey of wonderful characterization, the dumb stressfulness of college life and small pockets of optimism before you have to face the real world, the deliciously slow burn of their relationship... i read this in one go, and you should, too.

the way you look at me by ThinkingCAPSLOCK / @mocaw | bokuaka, rated T, pro volleyball au

Bokuto sees him every day, every commute, at the final train. The stranger he only knows as Train Guy. Wrapped in coats, mystery, and distance - that is, until Bokuto breaks their familiar silence. He struggles with the hardest part of befriending someone he thinks he already knows: taking a step back to reevaluate all his assumptions. He finds the easiest part is getting to learn about Train Guy all over again.

// the characterisation is!! so!! good!! not yet completed but every chapter has me curious about more development. i love the insight to bokuto as a person, as someone independent and surrounded with friends and teammates, and seeing akaashi through bokuto’s eyes is such a quiet, poetic thing.

another sunny day by @museicaliteacup | fukurodani, gen, canon-verse

Fukurodani loses at Nationals. No one on the team handles it very well. Konoha is no exception.

// i think this is one of the first fics that made me fall in love with the owl team. it’s sad, it’s angst, but the undeniable feeling of team togetherness is so warm. this will always be one of those fics i keep thinking back to, just because it impacted me so emotionally the first time i read it.

preferably forever by @risquetendencies | bokuaka, explicit, established relationship

Bokuto is more than a little excited when, breaking from their usual traditions, he and Akaashi go away on vacation for Christmas. It's sure to be relaxing, but then there's also the Christmas presents. Even though he's sure he's bought the best gift, he can't help but wonder what he might be getting in return.

// i’m always down for domesticity between these two but this fic made me tear up more than once, but in all the right ways. the characterisation makes me smile, bokuto is so vivid, their interactions with each other so natural i can’t help be jealous, just a little. this was such a joy to read, i’m sure you’ll fall in love, too.

Character Development by @silvercistern | bokuaka, rated T, fake relationship au

"That’s some kinda gratitude. I get the ideal guy to take you to prom, and you act like he's not even here? What happened to my painfully polite little brother?" "I doubt I’d let him take me to the hospital if I were bleeding to death."

Keiji needs a date. Bokuto needs dating lessons. Nothing could possibly go wrong.

// i’ve seen everyone rec this but i just had to bc holy shit i had a riot reading this. akaashi’s characterisation is so interesting? like i was deeply invested from the first few paragraphs, i’ve never wanted to root for someone as much as i wanted to smack them on the head. i love ensemble cast making cameos, and watching bokuto and akaashi slowly grow together in one of the best fic tropes is so. much. fun.

Connected by Tsucchi | ennotana, mature, space au

"It wasn't supposed to happen to him. He wasn't supposed to be Connected to anyone, nevermind this jerk he wanted nothing more to do with. He was supposed to work for his pardon, alone, and then start over - have a normal, peaceful life, with no one inexplicably tied to his fate."

Karasuno Operations always had unconventional methods, but this special tactics unit they've formed beat the rest. The ship full of eccentrics was intended to take on minor covert missions around the star system in the military's place, but instead they got caught up in grander schemes they never expected. And stuck in the middle are two men who don't see eye to eye, bound by a natural phenomena and forced to work together.

// this author singlehandedly converted me to this ship?? but seriously, this fic has been an emotional rollercoaster. the team feels is still there, the banter, the action and excitement, the character development and relationship growth, the mystery and slowly revealed character roles, and the world-building. holy shit the world-building. i’m still in awe, tbh.

smells like air salonpas by psidn | karasuno first years, rated T, canon-compliant

The Karasuno first years develop some new hobbies and strengthen their friendships.

// i loooove fics starring the karasuno first years friendship. and this fic does it in such a charming, fun way. i love the support that are shown in different ways, the dumb dweebness that comes with teenagerdom, the colourful days spent with these friends, and natsu appears? what more could you want.

it’s like the hunger games, but better | seijoh, gen, paintball

“Kindaichi,” Hanamaki laughs, striding across the room to pull him into a tight hug. “Kindaichi Yutaro you son of a bitch, I thought you were dead.” Kindaichi blinks, glancing to his left to see Kunimi - sitting crossed legged on a table next to a very sweaty looking Watari - looking just as confused as he feels. “Has— Has everyone lost their minds? It’s just a game of paintball.” “Just a game of paintball?” Hanamaki parrots, eyes widening as he takes another step forwards until they’re standing practically nose to nose. “Kindaichi, Kindaichi, my poor naive Kindaichi. This is more than just a game.” Kindaichi frowns. “It...is?” “Kindaichi,” Oikawa says sharply, shoving Hanamaki out of the way so he can grasp Kindaichi tightly by the shoulders. “This is a matter of life or death.” “I mean, I don’t think it’s really tha—” “Life or death,” Oikawa, Hanamaki, Matsukawa and Iwaizumi say loudly in unison.

// if you somehow haven’t read this yet, go read it immediately. especially if you’re having a bad day. i lost count how many times i’ve read this, but every single time i burst out laughing so hard it takes me a second to remember how to breathe. the memes. the shenanigans. the seijoh gang. the drama queens. this fic is fucking gold, i tell you.

i’m a house with no windows, you’re the flowers on the front porch by miracleboysatori / @tendouaf | ushiten, explicit, growing up together

Wakatoshi likes absolutes. He likes the idea of something being unchangeable, immovable, because he doesn’t have to worry needlessly about it. He can focus his energy on other, more important things. And among the absolutes he feels in his life, his bond with Satori is one of them. (aka: a fic focusing on ushiten's development from childhood through adulthood that no one really asked for but I felt an extremely strong urge to write anyway)

// i really, really love the characterisation of ushijima and tendou, and then the rest of the shiratorizawa team. i’m so very weak for childhood friends, and this fic follows them growing up together and into each other, and it warms my heart how far they’ve come and how far they can still go.

Put All Your Fears to Bed by chromyrose / @zahhaked | bokuaka, rated T, fluff without plot

Sometimes Bokuto needs solid reassurance; Akaashi is always willing to give him that and more.

// i find myself revisiting this fic sometimes, just because of how soft and warm and, idk, safe? the fic feels to me. bokuto’s mental state etc is such an important thing to me, and i love how these two are portrayed here, the closeness, the comfort. 

Under the Stars by writinghomunculus / @hanavmaki | kyouhaba, rated g

Hands dance along his back, and Kyoutani feels his skin catch on fire.

// this fic is lovely in the writing style itself, the snapshot moments between them, and the vivid sensory details. i’m personally weak to small touches of physical intimacy, and this fic paints kyoutani in such a gentle way, it really soothes my heart, because i know that everything will be okay.

myth au (series) by ilgaksu | levyaku, bokuaka, kuroken, rated T

// these are hauntingly poetic retellings of greek myths, starring our volleyfaves, and each one breaks my heart over twice. i’m in love with the writing, and even though greek myths don’t usually end well, the heartache is worth every word.

The Feeling in Our Chests by kiyala | kuroken, rated g, established relationship

Kuroo is in love. Luckily for him, Kenma is too.

// look at these two, being all gross and in love. i love how absolutely easy it is for them, the casual intimacy, the familiarity. this fic was so sweet, it was like breathing in deeply and then exhaling slowly after a long day.

Purcell by carriecmoney / @carriecmoney | iwaoi, rated T, college au

Tooru's got a busy semester lined up, so he shouldn't have time to worry about one irritating classmate following him around. And yet...

// the banter and frankly, ridiculous sexual tension between iwaizumi and oikawa here is hilarious. i love watching them bicker, and this author’s characterisation of them is always on point and highly enjoyable. i’ve reread this series so many times, and each time i find myself with a smile on my face. what are you waiting for?

tell me i’m lying by seconddaysea / @heroicsx | kagehina, gen

// this fic explores genderfluild kageyama in such a sweet, gentle way, i swear i was brought to tears. i love how supportive and sunshine hinata still is, how they fumble, but it’s okay. he’ll be alright. they’ll be alright.

salt in the wound by celestialfics / @tadachans | tsukkiyama, rated T

Tadashi’s always been drawn to traditionally feminine things, but he doesn’t think that means he’s a girl. He certainly doesn’t feel like he’s a boy, either, but to be something entirely different and new is a bit scary and hard to handle.

// this fic explores nonbinary yamaguchi and i love how strong yamaguchi is. he grows into himself. and his friendship with hinata is just great, and i love the portrayal of his and tsukki’s relationship. this fic both made me cry and made me laugh, and i’m sure you’ll enjoy it, too.

The Vanishing Castle by SilentNorth | bokuaka, rated g, howl’s moving castle au

Akaashi tells himself that he's perfectly content with his life. And he is. Probably. But somehow he attracts the attention of some sorcerers. Not his fault. And winds up cursed. Also not his fault. And finds himself in the middle of a war he has no business being part of. What exactly did he do to deserve this again? In order to go back to any sort of normalcy, Akaashi will have to turn to magic if he's to have any hope of breaking this curse. And the Vanishing Castle is one place to start.

// if you’re a fan of howl’s moving castle, you’ll fall in love with the rich worldbuilding and romance of magic in this fic. akaashi’s stubborn nature and his quiet strength is so prominent here, bokuto is as enigmatic and captivating as usual, and it’s just so easy to lose yourself in this au. it’s just breathtaking, honestly.

This Floating World by lowermiddlechild / @bicyclestandard | daisuga and more, explicit, modern fantasy au

Being a Dream Doctor isn't the easiest job Suga's ever had but after six years, he usually knows what to expect. That is until the day comes when he lands in a dream, ready to fight off nightmares, only to be shoved out of it a moment later. With one of his closest friends, Oikawa, avoiding him and his second closest friend, Kenma, avoiding his own problems, it looks like it'll be up Suga to figure out what exactly is going on.

// i’m a little behind on this fic but nevertheless it never fails to excite me when i see an update. the whole cast is there, the character interactions are refreshing, the magic is unsettling yet fascinating, the worldbuilding is definitely intriguing. i’m always on the edge of my seat wondering, what’s next?

... i’m gonna stop there for now, but know that the hq fandom produces some insanely great works. pls let your fave authors know you love them! thanks for sticking through with my babbling. ‘til next time, i guess!