#best thing to come out of that storyline is michonne hitting rick over the head to make him shut up that’s love baby

[dragonseeds]

thinking about shane telling rick congratulations when he finds out lori’s pregnant and both of them knowing full fucking well that baby is shane’s still makes me crazy in ways i cannot describe

[twdeadfanfic]

Life at the end of the world Pt.27

Summary: Your life as a zombie apocalypse survivor. It starts with the Reader settling into the camp at the quarry, before s1 and then follows the show events and storyline, more or less, but with the Reader in it.

Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Reader

Warnings: Slow burn, violence, language.

Author’s note:  I’ve been itching to write a fic like this for a long while and I write it for fun, I don’t claim to be a writer so if you find you dislike this fic, please be kind and just stop reading. English’s not my first language so maybe there’re some mistakes, I apologize in advance. For the same reason, I can’t write character’s accents and things like that. At any rate, I hope you enjoy it. There’d be several parts to this.

Masterlist

You didn’t know how long you had spent curled up against the tree, you didn’t care, and you had lost all track of time, but you snapped back to your senses when you heard some sounds close.

At first, you didn’t care, if it was a walker then that was it, let it come, but finally your surviving instincts kicked in and you got up, walking towards the sounds with your shotgun aimed in front of you.

You blinked in disbelieve at what you saw. It was Michonne, pulling with her to walkers. She had them tied up with ropes as if it were a lash and they hadn’t arms or jaw, in a rather unsettling sight. You recovered quick from your initial shock and ran to her, ignoring the two walkers.

“Michonne!”

She looked at you as if startled and you hugged her, tears in your eyes.

“I thought I wouldn’t see anyone again...I was scared...”

Michonne wasn’t saying anything and she was stiff in your arms without returning the hug or smiling even.

A sound alerted you of a group of walkers getting close.

“Hold this.” Michonne finally spoke as she passed you one of the ropes that held a walker. “Stay close. Walk slow.”

As if it were magic, the walkers passed around you without noticing you as Michonne and you walked slowly side by side. You wondered how she had figured it out.

You walked for hours in silence and you felt more and more tired, dragging your feet, you still hadn’t recovered totally from your illness. Michonne seemed to notice and, without a word, she led you to the road where you found a car in which you could stay for the night.

Michonne tied the walkers to the doors and sat down on the driver’s seat, propping her feet up on the passenger’s, leaving you the backseat.

“Rest.”

You thought you wouldn’t be able to sleep, your heart was broken and you were terrified of walkers managing to get into the car, but you were so weak that exhaustion took over you before you realized it, falling in an uneasy sleep.

You woke up with a start when a walker hit the window of your door, trying to bite through it, but the glass was resistant. Michonne was still asleep but she seemed agitated as if she were having a nightmare, whimpering softly.

“Michonnee...”

A loud blow on her window woke her up and she looked around startled. She saw the walkers that were hitting the car and she lowered the window ever so slightly, sinking her knife into the heads of the closer monsters, and you did the same.

When there were no more walkers close, you got out of the car and you followed Michonne into the woods again.

“Why are we leaving the road?”

Silence

“Where are we going?”

“Nowhere.”

That did nothing to ease your worries.

“Shouldn’t we try to find the others?”

“The others are gone, we won’t find them.” Michonne’s voice was cold and distant, sinking your heart.

“We found each other...” You said weakly, but she didn’t even look at you.

You couldn’t just keep walking forever without a destination, you didn’t want to. You wanted to find your family, needing to know they were okay. You needed to find Daryl, but you didn’t know how or if you could do it alone. Still, you couldn’t bear the idea of never seeing him again and you even considered leaving Michonne and trying to look for him yourself, but by then a big group of walkers had surrounded you. If you moved away from Michonne’s walkers, that would be the end for you.

Maybe that would be the best, though. It’d be better than roam the woods for the rest of your life, going nowhere. At least you wouldn’t have to feel the burning hole in your heart that threatened to consume you when you thought about Daryl.

You kept walking next to Michonne though, desperate silent tears falling down your cheeks. If she noticed, she didn’t say anything.

*

You didn’t know how long you spent walking, you didn’t care, you walked on autopilot, your mind far away from there. Michonne hadn’t said a word to you, seeming lost in deep thought but now you realized she seemed to be behaving strangely.

She was looking at the walkers with confused, scared eyes that worried you, walking in circles, and before you knew what was going on, she had decapitated your two bodyguard walkers and began doing the same with all the walkers around, making them notice you.

You sprung into action, hitting at the walkers with your shotgun to keep them away, not wanting to make noise by shooting at them, and soon Michonne had cleared them all.

Then, she fell onto her knees and began sobbing aloud. You didn’t understand what was happening but knelt down next to her, pulling her onto your arms.

“I’m sorry...” She sobbed again and again and you shushed, rocking her.

“You were right...” Michonne said when she stopped sobbing, though tears were still rolling down her cheeks. “We have to look for the others. We can’t go like this, living like this....” She gestured around. “It’s no good. I lived like this for so long, so long...until I found Andrea.”

She began sobbing again and you couldn’t stop your own tears.

“I thought I had lost everything again, I thought I was alone again...”

“I thought it too.” You whimpered and you both held each other for a moment.

Then, she got up and helped you onto your feet, walking you back to the road. She was almost as skilled as Daryl at getting oriented and tracking, and you admired her for it. You hadn’t been walking down the road for long when she pointed a footprint.

“Someone was here not long ago, walking in that direction...maybe it was something from our group.”

“We’ll find them.” You nodded, though you didn’t really believe your words.

You could only hope you’d find them, you had to believe you’d find Daryl or you wouldn’t be able to keep going, but it wasn’t easy, your heart was heavy. Michonne’s presence helped, though.

You walked and walked and soon you were exhausted and weak again.

“I...I’m not sure I can keep going for long.” You admitted, embarrassed.

“There’s a roadhouse close.” Michonne pointed at it. “We can rest there.”

Once you reached them, Michonne made sure there weren’t any walkers inside and then you both walked in. You sat down on the floor while Michonne scooped around, but she didn’t find anything useful.

“Someone was here not long ago, though...”

She left you inside to scoop outside too, but through the gap of the door you saw her sitting down outside and you could hear her talking in whispers with someone who wasn’t there as she cried quietly. It seemed a private, intimate moment, so you didn’t want to snoop and you let her have her privacy.

You were glad she was back to herself though.

“Time to go.” She reached out for you when she came back and you let out a tired sigh but let her pull you onto your feet.

The road led you to an abandoned housing area and you hoped you could scavenge some food, you were famished. Over everything, though, you hoped the others were there and you wouldn’t have to look for them anymore. The more time passed, the more desperate and less hopeful you felt.

“There’s someone in there.” Michonne seemed to have caught some movement behind a curtain.

Quietly, you both walked to the house and Michonne looked inside. You were worried and shocked when you saw her starting crying, but then she was laughing too.

“What?”

“Look inside.”

You did and you began laughing too, unable to stop your happy tears as you caught sight of Rick and Carl inside. You found them, they were there...

Before you could say anything, Michonne was knocking at the door.

As soon as it opened, Carl jumped out to hug Michonne. Rick stood at the threshold, grinning but looking like he had gone through hell and back, his clothes torn and bloodied, his face all shades of purple and with open cuts.

“I’m so glad we found you...” You honestly hadn’t believed it possible.

You ruffled Carl’s long hair and hugged Rick, but then looked around, looking for the person you needed the most. You had hoped he’d be with Rick.

“Daryl...” You were barely able to formulate the question, too afraid of the answer.

“I’m sorry...I haven’t seen him...” Rick’s smile fell, his face turning dark and his eyes sad. “But I’m sure he got out of the prison fine."

“Yeah...” It wasn’t that you weren’t happy to see Rick and Carl, and Michonne, but you felt close to tears.

“We’ll find him, Y/N” Michonne squeezed your arm, giving you a weak smile.

“Sure...” You nodded but as much as you tried, you couldn’t feel that hopeful.

It was taking all your strength not to break down and you walked to the sofa, sitting down there and hiding your face on your hands, resting your arms on your knees, trying to breathe deep. Daryl couldn’t be that far, Michonne could track him... Tried as much as you wanted, it didn’t make you feel better, and you couldn’t help your tears.

“And Carol?” You asked, your face still hidden. “Did you see if she got out?” She hadn’t been at the yard during the attack, neither you had seen her in the bus...you hadn’t seen her in a couple days, now that you thought about it.

You looked up when Rick didn’t answer. He was giving you a puzzled look.

“You don’t know...” He muttered as if realizing something.

“What?”

“Carol...she wasn’t there...”

“What you mean?”

Rick took a deep breath, scaring you for a moment. “It was her who killed David and Karen, Y/N.” You shook your head, no, it couldn’t be, but Rick kept talking. “Yes, she told me. I couldn’t have her there, Y/N, I couldn’t...I drove her away, left her with a car and supplies...”

No, no it couldn’t be, you couldn’t believe Carol could have done something like that, you couldn’t believe Rick would do something like that either. You were more and more devastated, your heartbreak mixing with your anger in a dangerous cocktail.

“You just kicked her out?!” You got up, your hands balled into fists and began hitting Rick’s chest. “You know how the world is now!! She could run into a herd of walkers! A dangerous group might find her! You sent her to die!”

“Y/N...” Rick stopped you, grabbing you by your wrists, but you pulled away. Michonne made to intervene but Rick lifted his hand to stop her. “I told Daryl, she’s going to be fine, she’s a survivor...”

“Yeah, sure, I bet you care so much...” You spat.

“I do, Y/N...” Rick sounded tired but you were too angry to care. “She was my friend you know it, but she killed people, what do you want me to do...”

“Not sent her alone out there to die, maybe!” You yelled. “And you didn’t say anything? I thought you weren’t taking decisions anymore.”

“I had to do something...I didn’t know what else...”

You shook your head. You couldn’t take it anymore, couldn’t deal with it, feeling you had lost your best friend and your love in one go. Your heat had broken into pieces and there was no way you could put yourself back together.

You couldn’t deal with being in the same room than Rick and you didn’t want them to see you like that, so you rushed away, walking up the stairs and locking yourself in one of the bedrooms. You fell down onto the bed, burying your face on the pillow and crying until you felt you hadn’t any tears left.

The sun had gone down when you heard a knock on the door. You got up and opened it, finding Michonne.

“Can I walk in?”

You shrugged but walked back, letting her walk in while you went to sit back on the bed. She sat down next to you, giving you some canned meat.

“Carl had found some food before we arrived.”

You were starving, feeling weak and dizzy, so you tried to eat, but you had a lump in your throat that made it hard to swallow and the food tasted like ashes in your mouth.

“Are you feeling better?” Michonne stroke your hair gently and you shook your head. “I know it’s not my place to say...but try not to go too hard on Rick, not now that we found each other again...”

You shrugged, you couldn’t make any promises.

You barely slept at all that night, no matter you had a real bed for the first time in forever, though at some point a couple of hours before dawn you managed to cry yourself to sleep.

Next morning, you walked down to find Michonne and Carl having cereal for breakfast, and they gave you a bowl. You weren’t hungry, your stomach closed, but you knew you had to eat or you just would get weaker.

“When are we going to look for the others?”

You asked once breakfast was finished. It didn’t matter you actually weren’t that hopeful about finding the others, you needed to try or you would just break down unable to keep going.

Michonne shifted uncomfortably.

“I think we should stay here...we’re safe here, for a while at least...I didn’t find any trace of the others out there.”

“What?” You looked at her in disbelieve, how could she give up your family so easily?

You had been glad you found Michonne, Rick, and Carl, sure, but you couldn’t just stay there forever without trying to find anyone else.

Over everything, you needed to find Daryl, or at least try to. If you were honest, you weren’t sure you’d be able to find him, but you had to at least try. If he was alive, which he had to be, you couldn’t even think about him being dead, he must be looking for you too. Maybe you should head back to the prison, maybe he would be looking for you around it...you couldn’t be sure.

Michonne just looked at you with sad eyes, but didn’t say anything else and you shook your head, walking back upstairs. You weren’t going to stay there, you were going to look for Daryl no matter if you had to do it alone. Carl and Rick had already scooped the house but you went to check into the rooms anyway, wanting to see if you could find anything useful before you left.

Somehow, your new determination made you feel better, or at the very least you didn’t feel like crying all the time.

“Y/N!” Michonne called you from downstairs. “I’m going with Carl to see what we can find in the other houses, wanna come?”

“Sure!”

You rushed downstairs, it was perfect, if you were lucky you could find supplies that you needed for your journey and you could start looking for Daryl and the others today.

Rick was uneasy about staying at the house to rest, but he still looked like shit, so he gave you until noon to come back.

You went from house to house, Carl and you silent and surly, though you felt a bit bad for Michonne who kept trying to lift the mood and made you two laugh, without much success. Both Carl and you were lost in your own dark thoughts.

“I had a three-year-old son and he happened to find me extremely funny.”

You snapped back to the present at Michonne’s words. What? A son? You looked at her puzzled. She had never said a word about that. You were curious, wanting to know more, but you didn’t want to be nosy or ask her questions, if she had lost him it must be a pain in her heart that would never go away.

She didn’t seem sad talking about it though, she had a smile on her face if only a bit sad.

Carl seemed curious too, and soon he had Michonne got into a game, with her answering questions about her life before, one for each room Carl cleared, finding anything useful. You were scooping different rooms so you didn’t get to hear much, just that she hadn’t had any other kids.

You didn’t realize you had wandered away from them until you looked around and saw neither Carl nor Michonne. You backtracked and found them in a kids room on the other side of the corridor, their expressions dark.

“My father let me name her.” You heard Carl telling to Michonne. “Maybe her and Andre are together somewhere.”

In your disgruntled state, you hadn’t even realized until now that baby Judith was missing. You felt horrible. Rick and Carl must be having a hell of a time. Tears threatened to fall down your eyes, but if you began crying you knew you wouldn’t be able to stop, so you closed your eyes tight, stopping them.

It was almost noon, time to come back, but when you had almost reached the house you stopped. You had managed to gather some supplies in your bag.

“I’m leaving.” You blurted out to Carl’s and Michonne’s surprise.

“What?”

“I can’t stay here...I need to find Daryl. I’m sorry...” You hoped they’d understand it, you loved them, but you couldn’t just give up on Daryl.

“You can’t go alone...you don’t even know where to start looking...”

“I don’t care...”

Before you could say anything else, some shoots coming from the house in which you were staying caught your attention, and you saw Rick running to you, telling you to run away, a violent and armed group had gotten into the home. Of course, you couldn’t have good things.

“I’m leaving.”

You announced again once you were out of the housing area, reaching some train rails.

“Y/N, wait...you don’t even know where are you going...let’s walk together for a while, okay?”

You were uncertain. You weren’t eager to be alone again, now you were afraid you might run into another dangerous group, and you weren’t even sure of where you were.

“Okay...”

You began following the rails in the direction in which you thought the prison may be, though you weren’t sure and ended up being the opposite without any of the others telling you anything. You didn’t realize it until you found a big signal in an abandoned train, after not having been walking for long.

“Sanctuary for all. Community for all. Those who arrive survive.”

And a map attached to it.

It seemed the rails all led to that place, Terminus. If the others had seen the signal, there was a chance they’d gone there looking for refuge, and even if they didn’t see it, if they followed the rails they’d end up in that place anyway. Maybe the others would be there. Maybe Daryl would be there.

You had to believe it.

“Let’s go.”

@momc95@jodiereedus22@osweetdevilo@sapphire1727@coffeebooksandfandom  @the-destielr@checkintoreality@aislingsartistry@daddys-little-princess67@sesshomaru-lover@crossbowking@coltcas@feartheendlesssummer@izumi37@gruffle1@drina365 @kuolematkorjaavat @daeshaunex2 @xtinkersimsx @stressed-lasagna @moraglefay

I never thought anyone’d like to be tag in any of my stories so thank you! It means the world!

If you want to be tagged please let me know.

[whateverisbeautiful]

Reveling in Richonne

121: The Turn (8x14)

The thing about this show is that it can have a weak season but, even then, there will still be at least a few moments that really deliver. And to me, this conversation between Rick and Morgan in this episode really delivers. 

It’s pretty moving and the fact that Lennie James and Andrew Lincoln are such phenomenal talents definitely has a lot to do with it. 💯

And in this conversation they have, there’s actually some Richonne connections to be made.

Plus, the events that occur in these following moments are particularly important since this is where we see a pivotal point for Rick. Imo it’s a large part of his turning point.

So after the beautifully acted moment between Rick and Michonne earlier, the next time we see Rick he’s sitting in a room with Judith. Rick clearly seems very distraught and then we see that he’s staring down at Carl’s hat, which is beyond heartbreaking, especially knowing that Carl was able to express what that hat meant to him in front of his dad. 😭

We’ve seen Rick have very brief moments of breaking and collecting himself post-Carl but I think this is the moment where the inner chaos that must be going on in his head is the most visible. Like this scene makes it clear how much all this is eating away at him. So he gets up and leaves cuz he can’t let himself sit in this pain. 

And it’s interesting that Judith was included in this moment because I think it just further hits home that Rick is in such a gripping head space that neither his wife or his daughter (the two lights he has left in this world) can bring him fully out yet. They definitely have come close, but right now his wrathful side has taken over and is spurring him to keep “moving to move away from it.”

So the very next scene is Rick walking outside with that coat on, so you already know what’s bout to go down. Someone or someone(s) finna meet their end. 💯

Another significant thing about this jacket is that it’s the one he wore when he killed the Claimer trying to kill Carl in the season 4 finale, and it just reminds me that Rick would do everything in his power to protect Carl and keep him safe and yet his son still eventually didn’t make it. (Why TWD, why?) 😢😪

On a lighter note, I notice how when Rick walks out it low key feels like when kids sneak out knowing good and well they’re supposed to stay inside lol. Like I def think all that looking around he does as he walks has to do with Michonne, cuz he knows if he runs into her then he won’t be able to help but abide to her wish that he stay here and process like he’s supposed to.

(Side note: I wish Michonne would have got her own storyline this episode so we could know what she did while Rick was out and in finding out he left. It would have been nice to know what she was up to that day. And not just cuz I’m in the ministry of #GiveMichonneMoreScreenTime)

This whole moment of Rick leaving is an indicator that Rick’s not in the best spot cuz Homeboy never goes against Michonne’s guidance if he can avoid it. Last time something like that happened he went crazy in ASZ.

So Rick approaches Alden and we’re seeing some signature Rick Nothing-to-play-with Grimes which I’m a fan of lol. He’s using his cop knowledge to get intel out of Alden and to get an idea of where those escaped Saviors might be.

Before walking away, Alden asks Rick that if it’s possible, could he not kill anymore people than he has to and he lets him know that Rick could have the potential to show these people a better way. 

It’s significant because it’s a very similar sentiment to what Carl expressed to him in his final moments. 

And again, it just goes to show that no matter how far he runs, everywhere Rick goes there is going to be some reminder of Carl and the message Carl instilled upon him.

After Alden tells him that showing these Saviors some empathy is something he could do, Rick responds saying “Yeah I could.” It’s low key petty, but I love the delivery of that line lol. 😋

At the same time, it’s yet another way to show that Rick isn’t ready to come to terms with Carl and his message. He knows he could do that, but he’s not trying to let the more rational side of him be in control of his actions right now cuz again, his goal is to kill away his problems.

So Rick leaves and then he runs into Morgan. And y’all they’re both on edge and losing it a little so probably not the best company right now lol. 

But I’m very happy these two got a storyline together cuz they started this series off and they’re some of the few characters that still have my heart on this show. Plus Lennie James and Andrew Lincoln are both seriously A1 actors. They are the best of the best in this cast, along with Danai and Melissa McBride imo. 👏🏽👏🏽(Which interestingly they play the four characters who lost children🏽)

When Morgan and Rick run into each other, Morgan’s in that murky headspace so Rick has to tell him “You know me”. And I love that it’s a “Clear” reference. It’s sweet that Rick knows how to proceed and talk Morgan down somewhat when he’s having an episode. It’s also sad cuz last time he told Morgan this, Carl was alive and well and forming the roots of his precious bond with Michonne. 😔

Rick also tells Morgan that he probably shouldn’t be out here which is true…for both of them lol. 

But what’s funny is that when Rick realizes they are both out here to finish off those Saviors he’s like “We finish it. You and me” to which I was like bruh but you just said he shouldn’t be out here 🤔…Again, not exactly thinking straight rn.

(Side note: Hearing him say “you and me” made me wish Rick would stop and remember how in 7x12 he told Michonne he wanted it to be “you and me reordering things together.” Cuz what he’s doing right now ain’t that.) 

It’s not long before Rick and Morgan find the place and are immediately captured. And seeing them tied up in that bar, I was just like Rick, friend…what is you doing. Cuz he’s supposed to be in his room reading a letter right now but instead he’s tied up in a bar with some Saviors. #wildin 

Plus I felt Rick also has to remember that him being out here in potentially life-threatening predicaments like this is going to greatly affect Michonne and Judith cuz he still have a family that needs him, and it would be devastating if they lost him so soon after losing Carl. But right now Rick can’t quite think pass the present.

I like how Rick wakes up so casually and asks how long he was out like he’s waking up from a nap tho. 😂 Homeboy is unbothered lol. Probably cuz he knows what he and Morgan are capable of. 

So these Saviors are trying to decide what their next move is and the sniveling one, Jared, is very eager to get back and turn Rick in. Rick then starts to recall Alden’s words and he presents an offer for the Saviors to come back to Hilltop and join them. He then gives his word and repeats what he said in 8x03 about how a man’s word “still gotta mean something”. Except this time there does seem to be less sincerity in his delivery. 

Jared’s not buying it and so then, y’all, I knew about Petty Rick but he was practically out-pettied by Morgan and I am here for Petty Morgan. 👏🏽👏🏽 His bold but casual honesty was great as he tells the Saviors; nah I’m def here to do what I have to do and kill all y’all. (And it’s funny cuz as Morgan starts really going off you can kind of see Rick look like he’s thinking “alright this might be too wild even for me” 😂)

Rick and Morgan warned these guys about a herd closing in and sure enough a swarm of walkers show up. Rick says “Thing is, we already killed you.”  and I don’t know why it’s said exactly but what I do know is that means he did kind of sort of warn them about what he’s about to do lol. 

They convince the Saviors that they’re too weak to take on this herd alone so some of the guys untie them. So then they’re all fending off this herd and a walker almost gets to Rick but then the Savior (that low key resembles early day Shane), takes out the walker before it can bite Rick, which makes it seem like he might be a real one.

But then things take a turn and get

Cuz Rick has the Saviors go in front of him and all Rick and Morgan have to do is just give each other a look like…

And that’s enough for both these OG’s to know what time it is and they proceed to take out all the Saviors.

Which my first reaction was like…

(Side note: That coat is undefeated, y’all.)

Now…I know this whole moment was controversial. And I have some thoughts on it lol. Cuz y’all the very first time I watched this I def felt like this was super cold of Rick and I felt like this was Rick dabbling way too far on the side of villainy. And with Rick having given his word I was like don’t tell me this show is trying to discredit Rick’s word, especially in the same episode he’s going to tell Michonne those words we’ve been waiting to hear. 

But then, like I have to do with many things, I stopped and addressed the error of my thinking. And I realized that this actually isn’t as heinous as it seems. Don’t get me wrong it was savage and revealing of how Rick’s in a very shaky spot, but in my opinion it was also sort of necessary and doesn’t make him a monster.

So while seeing Rick and Morgan at their most ruthless was tough to chew on initially, I eventually came to the conclusion that…

The way I see it, it’s like a kidnapping situation where oftentimes when someone is kidnapped and restrained from fighting back physically, they often use their words to help them escape by getting into their captors head. They will tell their captor anything to be let go, even if it’s a false promise like swearing they won’t say anything if they can go or that they’ll give them whatever they want, etc. These are all untrue but they’re used as an effective defense mechanism and escape strategy. 

And if it works and they’re able to escape and then they immediately break the promises they made, we’d understand that they had to give their word and then break it to survive. That’s what Rick had to do imo.

Cuz, while yes the Saviors untied them and even were working together to take out these walkers, the truth is there’s still not much of a legit reason to believe they can be trusted long term. 

Rick and Morgan were of use to the Saviors at the time, who knows what they’d do to them when the walker issue was done. They are after all on opposing sides of this war and technically have more loyalty to Negan than Rick. So Rick doesn’t have much reason to think they would genuinely side with him and it’s dangerous to risk finding out.

So Rick and Morgan’s lives were still on the line and Rick did what he had to do, which in this case was say what he had to say. His whole spiel about letting them go back to Hilltop was never his word, it was his defense mechanism to break out of there. It’s not that he meant it and went back on it, he never meant it.

What was his true word tho? That he was going to kill those Saviors and well…he def kept his word. 👀💯

And, yes, the vengeful aspect of this from Rick is not healthy and it’s definitely not Rick’s shining moment when he kills the guy that just saved his life but at least for me I don’t think this turn of events means Rick isn’t the guy we thought he was and especially most of all this does not mean he’s comparable to Negan in the slightest. Those comparisons just will never add up to me. 🤦🏽‍♀️

The most suspect aspect of this on Rick’s part is that it’s just so opposite of what Carl wanted for him, but in the end he’s not a horrible person for telling a lie to survive his captors. 

Plus doing all this allowed him to make it back to Michonne so...

So as Rick and Morgan are taking everybody out, I’m also here for Petty Morgan mean mugging Jared as he holds him to the gate, and then finally listens to Jared’s plea to let him go only once it’s too late. I was like…

Rick goes up to the guy who saved him and it’s interesting how similar the lighting is to the chapel scene where Rick spent his last moments with Carl.

There’s that same sort of light ray shining through and it’s ironic in a way cuz Rick promised to make it real for Carl but instead he’s just done the opposite of make it real, in the very same light. 

Admittedly, the most cruel feeling part of this whole thing is when Rick just bold face looks at this guy and cuts him off to tell him, “I lied.” But I think what we’re seeing right now is the very dark space Rick could go to if he doesn’t stop himself.

It’s deep to hear the Savior say he didn’t lie about wanting to make things work and it definitely sparks a contrast. Then, the Savior tells Rick they could’ve lived after and Lincoln does a great job of showcasing the suppressed emotion Rick feels at this moment.

The subtle smugness is quickly replaced with the struggle to pull the trigger cuz he knows he’s not right in the head and that he’s doing what his woman said “moving to move away from it.” But he can’t get away from it. 

Everywhere he goes, something or someone is reminding Rick of Carl’s dying wish in some way. And I bet it hits Rick that Carl was laying on the ground talking about this very thing of after and living together in peace. And that triggers Rick so he pulls the trigger. 

And this to me is the beginning of the turning point for him that actually starts to snap him out of this dark spot for a moment to become aware of what he’s becoming. 

Cuz as he stands around the bodies there’s definitely a sense that he’s gotten a big wake up call about how far he has strayed from Carl’s vision.

He’s slowly starting to sense that violence and wrath doesn’t solve the deeper pain and it isn’t the way to move forward.  

Morgan walks by and casually takes out a body about to turn, still in Petty Morgan beast mode I think. And what’s interesting is he says, “Everybody turns” and that line starts to carry a lot of weight. 

It means so much more than just everybody turns into walkers. It means everybody can turn from their old ways. In this world, everybody turns from their initial values and moral code at some point (especially after the loss of a child as we see in the cases of Rick, Morgan, Michonne and Carol in different parts of their journey)

But the thing is, yes everybody turns from who they are or were but just like you can turn dark, you can turn light again. You can turn back. 👌🏽 And in this following scene there really is a turning point for Rick where his eye are opened to how he has to turn things around.

Rick has a choice to continue on this dark path or be better and get better, not just for him but for his family and his people. So it’s significant that next we see Rick take a step towards that by reaching out to Morgan for an answer. And he gets just the answer he needs to realize which side he should choose.

He starts by telling Morgan how he saved him and he would have died without him, maybe even right in front of Morgan’s house. I love that these two get to make reference to the episode that started it all, 8 seasons later. Cuz they really were the two who drew us into this world.

What’s so meaningful about Rick bringing this up is that in the pilot Rick was to Morgan, what Siddiq was to Carl.

Rick was just a stranger at the time, but Morgan helped him like Carl took in Siddiq. So I think Rick is asking Morgan this right now because he’s trying to better understand Carl’s own thinking of helping the traveler by understanding why Morgan did that for him.

This is important cuz it’s Rick wanting to understand Carl’s side of things. So that right there let’s you know he’s not embracing the monster within, or at least he’s trying to fight it.

He reaches out to Morgan in hopes that it’ll help him see something that’s super difficult for him to see right now which is how to give people a chance again. He wants to be different and he’s essentially trying to gauge how by seeing why Morgan was able to do it for him, a stranger, all that time ago.

As Rick asks this, Morgan doesn’t want to talk about it and he just wants to go. Rick goes on to mention “Your son was there” and that’s when Morgan really wants to shut the conversation down cuz he still feels he’s not at a place to talk about Duane.

And this moment between them is so emotional because we were introduced to these two characters as fathers who would do anything for their sons and now they’ve both lost the very people they fought and lived for in the beginning. 😔

Rick continues to urge Morgan to just tell him why he saved him because reflecting on who they were before could help them understand how to try and be that again. 

And, while Morgan’s not at a place to just fully pour his heart out about this, he does manage to give Rick an answer that’s pretty profound.

He explains that the reason he did it was, “Because my son was there”. Y’all. 😭😭 

This is such a great response. The writing on this show has been suffering for a minute but that right there was spot on and really hit home to me. 👌🏽

It means so much. It’s so true that Morgan’s son gave him his humanity and then when he lost him, he lost all that humanity for a long while. And Rick has the potential to be in a similar spot cuz Carl was that instrumental to him as well. And you can tell that when Rick hears this he knows it too.

He knows it’s his son who kept him going for so long, especially before their family expanded, and so there’s a certain added somberness to this response cuz the very thing that motivated him is no longer with him.

But unlike Morgan who no longer has Duane to guide him to good, Rick still does have one more opportunity for Carl specifically to guide him to good; the letter.

So I think this is where Rick knows it’s time to read the letter. He needs his son’s guidance if he’s going to maintain his humanity, a humanity we saw jeopardized in this savior massacre (although, again, when you’re captured by the opposing side sometimes you have to finesse a situation)

(Side note: Speaking of finessing, that whole Jadis and Negan storyline was just a mess imo. Negan getting access to the guns and photos had me really wondering if he was a looney tunes character. And the fact that Jadis freed him and let him finesse her on her own turf with a brief bit of his backstory really had me like...

And also how is Negan going to see a helicopter and just casually be like; hey maybe we can chat about that one day?)

But I think the other saving grace that proves hope isn’t lost, is that Rick still has someone who Carl absolutely lives on through. Michonne and Carl had such an impact on each other and she represents so much of the good of Carl so through her and through Carl’s final words in the letter Rick can find his way back to the light.

Rick is a good man and a lot of what kept him that way was the motivation of his son, and without him that good complex got a little skewed, but deep down Rick still is good and wants to be good. So he knows something has got to give.

But the main reason I see this moment as Richonne related is because a big reason Rick let Michonne in, way back in season 3 is because his son was there. 😭

Like of course there was also an innate connection that Rick and Michonne seemed to have from the jump, but Rick was so entranced at that first meeting at the fence that it wasn’t until Carl spoke about helping her that Rick ran and brought her in. His son was taking in that moment similar to Duane in the pilot.

And then in the more personal sense of letting her in, it was also because his son was there to tell him Michonne is one of them that helped Rick feel more free to let Michonne further into his heart. 😊

And that decision to let her in changed his whole life for the better. Like she really did make life 1000x better for him. So if anything, that’s a telling reason of why sometimes letting people in works out and he should follow his son’s guidance, cuz Carl has shown him the way before and he can show him the way now too.

They end the scene with Rick in the broken mirror cuz, a little heavy handedly, it’s the broken man in the mirror. 

But it still speaks to something important because Rick’s been broken and it’s led him to go and act in the very way Carl didn’t want him to, so the mirror is this symbol of him having to face his issues head on and see more clearly that this isn’t the way.

So as Rick faces the man in the broken mirror he knows he’s at a crossroads with a crucial decision to make. Continue on as this cold blooded killer and lose his mind and have Carl’s death cripple him with insanity or turn to Carl through his letter to lead the way and make him a better man once more. 👌🏽

(Side note: I’m glad they didn’t have him look in the mirror cuz then I would have got some SNL “Californians” vibes lol 😂)

It’s really significant that 8x14 highlights the four characters who lost kids and that in this episode they each get to make reference to their kids and the way it changed them, because I think Carol, Michonne, and Morgan’s journeys after losing kids are meant to all represent paths Rick can choose to take having just recently joined this club.

He can be like Morgan and fall into a very fragile state of mind where he has unstable episodes and is never able to talk about it much. 

Or he can be like Carol and, as she says later in her words, “become nothing for a long while” only to emerge a strong fighter who also pushes the people close away and convinces herself that she has to be isolated. (Which side note: I’m proud of Carol that she was able to make some breakthroughs this episode in letting people in again)

Or he can be like Michonne who went to a very dark space like he’s gone to and then worked to put all this “moving to move away from it” behind her to face her demons and get to a point of healing and opening her heart to the love that was there for her.

I think it’s clear which road he should take.  And luckily the woman, who fought to overcome that shut down state she was once in, is willing and ready to walk this path of healing with him.😌

So this moment with Morgan is not only one of the best scenes of the season to me, but it is also the turning point for Rick. This is where he makes a decision on who he needs to be. 💯

Rick is not going to keep being this dark vengeful bloodthirsty guy, because he made a promise to Carl that he’s going to fight to keep. And he’s going to fight to keep this promise cuz, at his core, Rick is a man of his word. 👌🏽😌

And he has three very special words to say in this next moment. Amen. 😋🙌🏾😋🙌🏾😋🙌🏾😋🙌🏾🏾😋🙌

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