#beommie's dreams

[beomiracles]

𝐂𝐑𝐈𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐀𝐋 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐒𝐂𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 TAPE 01

𝓓𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐌 𝓔𝐍𝐓𝐑𝐘 ⸝⸝ Moving rapidly through your career as one of the leading female investigators, you never once encountered a case you couldn't crack. Though you never expected for your past mistakes to come back and haunt you in the form of an ex lover, accused of murder. ⸝⸝

𝓹airings criminal!beomgyu x detective!reader 𝔀arnings blood, character death, descriptions of violence/slight gore, implied sexual encounters, womanizer!beomgyu, making out, penetrative sex, public sex, alcohol consumption.

📼 THE TAPE RECORDINGS

𝓣𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝓢𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐘 contains dark themes portraying unhealthy and toxic relationships and substance abuse. reader discretion is advised ! — this story is partly told in flashbacks, beware of timestamps as past/present are mixed throughout the story.

#serene adds ✎.. heh, realised after I hit post that I forgot to add a little note for myself on here. hmm... criminal conscience yes, I missed this series, a lot :3 super happy for it to be back, and better than ever !

[ ▶︎ •၊၊||၊|။| TAPE 01 ] — Stay Away From Choi Beomgyu — recording length; 5.9k

📼 —  April 5th 2023

It was cold. Your cheeks were wet, and whether that was from the rain pouring down on you, or the endless tears streaming down your face you didn’t know. But it was cold. It was dark too, awfully so. Yet you could clearly make out the image of him, his hunched over figure, his bloody hands moving without even the slightest tremble as they clenched and unclenched into fists. For a moment it looked like he wanted to reach out, to touch you. 

The way you flinched, taking a quick step backward made him frown. “Dollface..” He tries, his voice uncharacteristically soft, the tension on his face easing up, if just for a moment. But you won’t hear it. Fuck, you could take the drugs, the lying and the cheating…Suppose you never were together in the end, not officially at least. — And you could take it. All of it. 

This was different. This was… You glance between the blood on his shirt, down to his bruised knuckles. You knew what he’d done. Something truly unforgiving, something evil, inhumane. Beomgyu was a terrible person. For months you’d let yourself be blindsighted, too caught up on trying to fit him into the life you’d imagined, into a life that would never be his. Because that was not who he was. 

You thought things would be different with you. That you somehow stood out from the rest, that maybe… Maybe he wasn’t as bad as people made him out to be. But you should’ve known. You should’ve known to stay away from Choi Beomgyu. 

“You’re a monster.” 

It happens before you can even stop it, the way the words fall from your quivering lips. Your voice is strained with the effort of keeping down another sob, and your breath comes out shaky with each exhale. — He doesn’t look surprised, in fact his expression remains perfectly unreadable, just like it always did. That hurts the most you think. 

He takes a step forward, his shoes making a wet noise against the muddy ground. The rain makes his clothes cling to his body, his dark hair matted against his face, shielding his dark eyes from view until he pushes the strands back. — “C’mon dollface, we can work this out.” The once sweet nickname now made you feel sick. Butterflies no longer surged within your stomach, though, you’re not so sure that they ever had. 

You shake your head, adamant in your decision as you swallow. “Stay away from me.” Even though your voice is close to cracking it seems to break his trance, and Beomgyu looks confused for the first time. It would’ve been an almost satisfactory sight, had it not been for your current situation. But one quick glance toward the blood smeared all over him makes you want to vomit. 

“I never want to see you again.” 

And you hoped you never would. With all of your heart and being you wished to never see Choi Beomgyu ever again. 

⸝⸝ 

📼 — PRESENT TIME ; February 19th 2024

“Hello?” 

Your words are followed by a thick silence and after almost twenty seconds you sigh. “Are you calling from downstairs again? You know the connection there is terrible.” Another minute passes, and you listen to the bruising noise of nothing for what feels like forever until Yeonjun’s voice finally breaks through on the device. 

“Hello? Oh, there you are!” He sounds almost surprised over the fact that the line seemed to actually be working. “Yes, yes I know I shouldn’t be calling from down here, but the elevator’s broken..” — He clears his throat before rapidly continuing. “Alright, I’ve got someone for you, can you make it down to room 31 in ten?” 

The groan passing your lips rings out into your office, bouncing off the walls and surely picking up on the phone despite the shitty connection. “Do you know what time it is? I’ve just barely made it here..” You grumble, yet you’re already rising from your chair, eager to be assigned a case from your senior. 

Yeonjun hums and you hear the clicking sound of what you assumed to be a pen. “We’ve kept him detained all night, best to get going quickly so we can move him over this afternoon.” He sounds absentminded when he speaks, as if his attention was elsewhere, likely reading off of the file in his hands. Still, you frown at his words. 

“Move him? To where, custody? How do you know we’ll have to do that?” Yeonjun doesn’t answer right away, which was unusual for him, and you pause with your hand on the door handle. — “I think it’s best you just come down here”, he then says, the finalisation in his tone evident. You bite the inside of your cheek, your mind suddenly swimming with questions you longed to ask. But you shrug them off, twisting the handle as you step outside. 

“Alright, I’ll be there.” 

The walk to the basement where the interrogations took place was an even longer one today. With no elevator you’re forced to stumble down four sets of stairs, silently vowing to yourself never to wear heels to work ever again. 

Fishing through your pockets, you grab onto the first thing you come across. A small tube of red lipstick, the engravings on its container made your heart skip a beat as you recognized its origin. Oh. You thought you’d gotten rid of that.. But the small cosmetic seemed to have made it during your move not long ago. How odd. 

The sound of your heels come to an abrupt halt as you stop to apply the red tint to your lips, using the camera on your far too old phone as a mirror. Despite its long history, the color remained just as bold as it had been when it was brand new. For some reason the revelation made your chest contract. — Screw it, you thought as you pushed the container back into the depths of your pocket. You would make sure to get rid of it on your way home. The past should remain the past, and for good reasons too. 

Interrogation room 31 is by the very end of the hall. The lights here had yet to be switched out and some of them flickered in a most uncanny way, setting the scene for something akin to a horror movie. However your worries come to ease when you spot your senior outside the door. Leaning against the wall, Yeonjun pushes his glasses further up the bridge of his nose as his eyes remain glued to the files in front of him. 

“Took you long enough”, he huffs without taking his eyes off the clipboard. You raise a threatening fist his way but lower it again with a small grin, “whatever.” Yeonjun cocks an eyebrow your way but doesn’t make an attempt to comment as he instead sighs. — “23 year old male, brought in yesterday around 1am..” He begins, his expression quickly schooling into a more professional one, and you’re instantly reminded of how he used to be when you trained under him. 

He flips the paper, eyes dropping as he scans the written documents. “He’s in for first degree murder and attempted arson.” Shit, that’s serious. — “Are there any witnesses?” You ask, interrupting him when your curiosity gets the better of you. Though it would likely be far too soon to determine that. Yeonjun shakes his head, “None have come forward, besides it’s still too early to say.” You nod, heat rising on your cheeks at the small misstep. 

“Then, how is he linked to the crime?” 

Yeonjun’s eyes snap toward you upon hearing your words, his jaw twitching ever so slightly. “Victim’s DNA on him”, he says as he hands you the file belonging to the victim. Your gaze immediately falls on the number of pictures already gathered from the scene. From the blood covered floorboards to the discarded knife, the bloody bathtub and the victim himself. 

“Park Baekhyun”, Yeonjun says as he points to the picture snapped of a man in his mid thirties. He was bruised from head to toe, his limp body awkwardly laid in the full tub. “34, male, cause of death was asphyxiation due to his head being held underwater for an extended period of time.” 

Once he’s reached the end of his small debrief, your jaw hangs slack. Whoever did this had no intentions of sparing the poor man. And judging by the way the scene looked, they didn’t seem to ever have.

“Will you be alright with this one?” Your senior’s question pulls your attention from the files in your hand, and you quickly nod. “Of course!” This was your first big case, and there was no way you would back down now, not when an opportunity had presented itself like this. 

Yeonjun leans over to unlock the door, his hand on the handle when he turns to you. “Remember I’m always-” — “On the other side of the glass, I know.” You finish with a small smile, and Yeonjun scoffs as he shakes his head. 

Interrogation rooms are small, their walls stripped bare and sterile. With no windows and not even a clock to tell the time, the space feels nearly suffocating. A metal table is placed by the center of the room, adorned with scratches and uneven sections from its years of mistreatment. Above it hangs a single fluorescent light, casting the room in an almost clinical glow. 

The man before you sits on one of the uncomfortable chairs, his head bowed and his cuffed hands resting on the table. His long dark hair shields his face from view, and you find your own gaze dropping to the files in your hands once more as you slide into the seat opposite him. 

You clear your throat, the quietness of the room only amplifying the sound of you swallowing again. “You’re being investigated on the grounds of first degree murder of Park Baekhyun and attempted arson against his property. You have the right to remain silent and or request for an attorney. Keep in mind that anything you say here can be used against you in court.” 

Exhale. 

With a quick glance toward the thick glass window to your left, you allow yourself a momentary break. No matter how hard you squint, it was impossible to make out anything on the other side. But you knew that Yeonjun was watching, and it made everything ten times more surreal. — When you notice that the suspect has yet to speak, you turn your attention back to him. 

He remains in front of you, with his head bowed as his fingers absentmindedly tap against the cool metal table. Your breath catches in your throat when you survey the dark rings adorning almost each and every one of his fingers, they looked oddly familiar. But before you have time to ponder the matter further, he lifts his gaze. 

His dark hair falls from his face, making his equally dark eyes meet yours, instantly they seize you with a look you knew all too well. The persistent tapping of his fingers come to an abrupt halt as his lips curl into a menacing smirk, the one that used to make your stomach twist. In that moment, you knew that he knew. Still, you deny it, hands fervently flipping the files as you replace the victim’s with his. 

Your heart plummets through the floor when your eyes land on the name, and suddenly it all makes sense. He was bound to end up in this room one day, you knew that, you had known that for a long time. You just… Had never imagined to be the one on the other side. 

His smirk only widens, exposing the sharp and shiny teeth that had grazed your skin so many times before. A breathy laugh rumbles within his chest, but he doesn’t take his eyes off of you, not once. He exhales with a short breath: 

“Dollface. It’s been a while hasn’t it?” 

The pet name makes an ice cold shiver crawl up your spine. You push down the insults waiting on your tongue, the months of resentment and the anger. Inhaling slowly, you remain perfectly still. He studies you close, dark eyes narrowing as he tilts his head to the side. It was as if he was trying to calculate your next move, you knew that he could. 

“Beomgyu.” The name tastes foul in your mouth, making you want to spit it out. You thought you’d left him behind, left him for good. For ten months you had tried to recover from him, from everything he’d put you through. All of it for nothing. Now he was closer than ever, within an arm's reach, if you so wished to touch him. 

His smirk only widened, he was enjoying this, you could tell it thrilled him. “In the flesh”, he says, his voice a low drawl as he drinks in your slightly bewildered expression. There were so many things you wanted to tell him, so many things you wished to get off your chest. But before you can even get a word out, the door to the interrogation room is slammed open. 

You don’t have to look to know who it is. Yeonjun’s presence could be felt from miles away as he looms over you. “A word outside”, is all he says, before promptly turning on his heel and walking out again. — You don’t take your eyes off of Beomgyu when you rise to your feet, and the smirk on his face persists even when you exit the room. 

“Alright, what’s going on?”

Your senior’s voice echoes down the vacant hallway and you wince at the accusation of his tone. How did you tell him, how did you come clean about the fact that you had history with the man currently detained and cuffed on the other side of the door. — Pulling your bottom lip between your teeth, you hesitantly chew on it as your eyes dart between the floor and the walls, anywhere but him. 

“Well I… Sort of knew him..” The words come out awkward, and you grimace at the way you presented the situation. Yeonjun’s frown only deepens, the crease on his forehead becoming even more prominent. “Knew?” He presses, and you suddenly feel as if you were the one being interrogated. This was not how your first case was supposed to go. 

“Well.. I haven’t seen him in a long time.” You press your lips into a thin line, forcing yourself into a more upright stance as you try your best at holding his gaze. — “How long?” Yeonjun counters, to which your heart sinks. How long has it been? You hardly kept track, for Choi Beomgyu was someone you longed to forget. “Ten months”, you finally say. 

Your senior sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose between two fingers as he bites the inside of his cheek. He remains quiet for a good minute and you anxiously fiddle with the hem of your sleeves, glancing over your shoulder to make sure that no one was witnessing the most embarrassing conversation taking place. 

“I’ll take you off the case.” 

No. He can’t do that, can he? Well he technically could. Still, it was an option you refused to consider. “No.” You promptly say, rolling your shoulders back once as you prepare to face his rejection. You didn’t know why your first thought was to refuse, why a pang shot through your chest at the idea of having the case go to someone else, but it did. 

Selfish as you were, you thought you needed this case for your own gain. Whether it was to find some sort of closure for the way things ended, or perhaps even to satisfy your own curiosity. Either way, you knew that this case belonged to you. — “I’m confident that I can do this.” Your voice doesn’t waver, and your gaze is firm as you peer up at Yeonjun. 

Your senior sighs, carding his fingers through his hair as he mutters something under his breath. “It’s against policy and I shouldn’t-” — “Please, Yeonjun.” You take a step forward, hopeful eyes silently pleading with him. 

“I could be of great help, I’m certain of it, please just give me a chance.” — Yeonjun doesn’t look convinced, his dark brows furrowed as he glances between you and the shut door. Patiently you wait as he thinks to himself, your heart thrumming in your ears as you refuse the urge to beg him further. 

Finally, he huffs, shaking his head once, as if in disbelief of himself. “Alright, but if I notice that things are getting out of hand you’re off, are we clear?” 

Eagerly you nod, “Of course. Thank you, sir!” You catch the way he rolls his eyes, coughing slightly as he dismisses you with the wave of his hands. “Don’t act formal with me now”, he tsks, shooting you a small sideway glance. He reaches for the handle once more, holding the door open for you as you enter the suffocating interrogation room a second time that day. 

The silence is deafening as you step back inside, the sound of the door clicking shut behind you echoing off the four confined walls. Beomgyu remains seated, mindlessly fiddling with the rings on his fingers, the cuffs around his wrists scraping against the metal table. — You force yourself to remain stoic as you approach once more, carefully taking your seat opposite him as you place your files down in front of you. 

You clear your throat, ready to begin the initial interview when he suddenly speaks. “You look different.” He presents the statement causally as he leans back in his chair, it makes a squeaking noise at the action. Your heart pounds against your ribcage and you swallow as you hold his gaze. — “People change”, you say, your throat suddenly feeling dry. 

Beomgyu shakes his head, his dark and piercing gaze trailing along your figure. “But you act the same.” His lips stretch into a menacing smirk and you have to force the memories of those very lips against your own and all over your body, out of your head. Focus. You couldn’t afford to be taken off the case. 

“Last night”, you start off strong, your voice firm as you finally divert your attention from the files you’d been clinging onto, “You were present at Park Baekhyun’s property around 1am. What were you doing there?” 

The smirk has yet to fall from his face and Beomgyu cocks an eyebrow your way as he lets go of the rings he’d been fiddling with. “Cleanin’ up a mess”, the nonchalant tone he used masks any hint of unease he might be experiencing. 

“What kind of mess?” 

A glimmer of mischief flashes across his almost black eyes, it was one you recognized. His tongue prods against the inside of his cheeks, his hands flat against the metal table. “Well certainly not the ones we used to make.” The mockery made your skin crawl and you fought back the insults surfacing as you clenched your jaw. 

“Please refrain from straying off topic”, you say, your voice eerily calm. Beomgyu rolls his eyes, but doesn’t attempt to argue as he regards you with a bored expression. “One of my employee’s messed up”, he shrugs, “Fairly new to the job so I can’t really hold him accountable.” — You watch as his eyes flicker over to the window on his right, his gaze narrowing on the thick glass. 

“You gotta go easy on the newbies”, he then adds without tearing his attention from the window. And even though he couldn’t see Yeonjun, he without a doubt knew that he was there. For a moment, it felt almost as if he was addressing your senior and not you. 

Beomgyu’s gaze soon flickers back to you, the smirk on his lips returning within seconds. “But you would know all about that wouldn’t you?” His eyes flash with underlying desire, “I went easy on you the first time.” 

He didn’t. Perhaps that was why you remembered your first encounter with Choi Beomgyu to this day. 

⸝⸝ 

📼 — March 28th 2022 

The floor thumps in rhythm to the loud bass that echoes from the DJ booth. Sweaty bodies are pressed against one another as people tear their way through the dancefloor. The fluorescent lights blind you as they flash from purple to blue to green and back to purple again. — Perched awkwardly on a high stool by the bar, you watch as the night unravels before you. 

Clubs had never been your forte. Especially not during the weekends where they seemed to host a home for the whole city as everyone drank their day to day problems away. Your eyes scan for Kayla, she was the one who’d brought you here in the first place. After listening to her persistent whining for almost an hour you had finally caved, but at what cost? 

As soon as your coats had been left, she’d darted for the dancefloor, not as much as a second thought about you as she searched for her next victim. You shouldn’t even be surprised anymore, it was in her nature honestly. 

You’ve already emptied two glasses, and now you’re tapping the cool rim against your lips as you aimlessly peer out over the crowd. The idea of another drink enticed you, but your wallet strongly disagreed with that idea, thus you were left far too sober for your own liking as you avoided any attempts at socialising. You weren’t here to make friends, much less fuck around. 

It was then, in the midst of a heavy sigh, that your eyes fell on him. Back then you hadn’t known his name, you hadn’t known anything of what was to come. Your first thought was that he wasn’t your type. And you wanted to leave it at that, to let your eyes continue their endless roam and forget about him, but you couldn’t. 

Your gaze clung to him as it trailed along his dark and long hair, perfectly framing his sharp features. Then to the half-hearted smirk he wore, to his dark clothes and the black rings around almost each and every one of his fingers. And then finally to his eyes, darker and all the more menacing than the rest of him, they seemed to glow under the neon lights. 

For some reason, he was looking at you too. Despite the two half-naked girls draped over him, their hands insistently clawing at every part of him they could access, undoubtedly whispering beyond filthy shit in his ears with sickeningly sweet giggles. — Why was he looking at you?

He wasn't alone, far from it. The small booth he occupied held, not only him and the two girls, but at least three other guys as well, all wearing the same brooding expressions. You should look away, pretend like you’d never seen him in the first place, but the longer you stared at him, and the longer he stared back, it became increasingly more difficult. 

His smirk widens when he brings his glass to his lips, and over the rim you catch the sly wink he sends you. Your heart stumbles over its next beat, your own glass stuttering against your chin as you grip it tighter. 

It wasn’t like you weren’t used to getting hit on, or even subtly flirted with. But there was something undeniably different about this man. Despite your earlier complaints on your sobriety, you suddenly felt intoxicated in a way you never had before. 

And so you did the only reasonable thing left to do. You winked back. 

He chuckles, even though you’re unable to hear it, you can see it in the way his chest rises and falls. His ring clad hand slides along the thigh of one of the girls, who giggled as she leaned in to kiss his neck. He seemed to pay her little mind, those same dark eyes still fixed on you.. 

“Don’t even think about it.” 

Kayla’s voice is sharp, and it snaps your attention from the stranger and over to your friend as she takes the seat next to yours. Slouched over the bar, she orders herself a glass of water which she begins gulping down. — “What?” You question as you watch her wipe her lips. 

“That guy, the one you were eyeing”, she points in the direction of the man you’d just been gawking at, “He’s no good.” She gives a firm nod, glass gripped tightly in her hand as she peers down at the liquid floating around. — “How’d you know?” You scoff as you, too, turn back to the bar. Perhaps she was jealous of you succeeding in finding someone when she wasn’t, it wouldn’t be a first. 

But Kayla only huffs, her nails tapping against the glass as she purses her lips. “Only uses women for his own personal gain and pleasure, you’ll get hurt.” 

“What if I only seek pleasure?” That was a lie, because you didn’t, far from it. You were nothing like Kayla, at least you liked to think you weren’t. —- “Then I suggest you seek it elsewhere, I meant what I said, he’s bad news.” 

“How do you know that?”

Her knowledge about this stranger intrigued you. Had she hooked up with him before and got jealous by the possibility of you doing the same? Had he rejected her? 

Kayla sighs, her expression taking on an almost melancholic form as she sets her glass down. “Do you remember Shay?” She suddenly asks and you frown, confused by the mention of her old friend. “Yeah? You haven’t mentioned her in a while, did something happen?” 

Your friend snorts, throwing a glance over her shoulder as she nods toward the man by the booth. “Yeah, he did. – One night she’s off with him, next time I see her is two weeks later, drugged out of her fucking mind and unable to stand on her own goddamn legs.” A visible shiver runs down Kayla's spine as she recalls the events in her head. 

Turning back to the counter, she picks up her glass, “Besides, I’ve never seen him with the same woman twice.” With that, she downs the remaining water before pushing the now empty glass away. — “Better to try your luck on the dancefloor, hm?” She suggests as she attempts to pull you along. 

“I’m fine here.” You give her a small smile, watching as she nods before turning to disappear through the thick crowd. 

As much as you tried to keep your gaze from wandering, it somehow ended up by that godforsaken booth yet again. Except this time, the man seemed far too busy to spare your hopeless stares as much as a second glance. One of the girls had crawled onto his lap, shielding most of his face from view as she pressed her lips to his. 

His fingers squeezed around her hips before his hands traveled down the curve of her ass, barely covered by the ridiculously short skirt she wore. — They only broke apart for him to mutter something to one of the others present, their following laughter almost overpowering the loud music. 

With a small grimace you finally tear your gaze from the sight, slumping back against the bar with a tired sigh. This night seemed to drag on forever. Perhaps you could call a cab home, Kayla would probably want to stay at least another two hours, something that you weren’t quite feeling. 

You brace your hands on the countertop with the intention of heaving yourself from your chair and search for your friend when the bartender suddenly catches your attention. Wordlessly he places a drink in front of you, making your head jerk up as you give him a confused look. “I didn’t order–” 

“Booth 12”, he nodded to somewhere behind you but you hardly needed to turn around to know where this drink had come from. With your heart in your throat, you take the cool glass, eyeing the pinkish hue of the contents that swirled around the ice cubes. Why had he bought you this? Hesitantly you bring the glass to your lips, taking a small sip as you let the liquid slip down your throat. 

It tasted sweet, and you quickly found yourself going back for more. But hadn’t he been busy just a few moments ago.. Perhaps you’d read him wrong. — Suppose you could finish this drink and then head home. But you can barely get as much as another sip in before the seat next to yours becomes occupied. 

Through the corner of your eye you can easily make out his long dark hair, the faint smirk on his lips as he clasps his hands on the counter in front of him. For a moment, there’s an awkward silence hanging over the two of you. He doesn’t say anything as he gazes ahead, part of you wondered if he’d even come here with the intention of talking to you at all. 

You take another sip of your drink, desperate for the liquor to take effect. The man shifts in his seat, and you feel as though you were on fire when his head turns in your direction. Even with no words he managed to make your heart beat in a frenzy as you clutched your glass tightly. 

His dark and piercing gaze is unforgiving as it roams your figure, undoubtedly lingering where it shouldn’t. It was like he knew no shame. You should’ve told him off, you should’ve gotten up and left. For some reason you find yourself staring at him with equally invading eyes. 

“I haven’t seen you here before.” 

It’s the first time he speaks, his head falling to the side as he studies you. “You new around town?” His voice is smooth, clean of any stuttering or awkwardness. A small part of you envied how easily he seemed to be carrying himself. — You shake your head, “No.” 

The man raises an eyebrow, and you don’t stop him when he reaches for your drink. The rings around his fingers make a clanking sound against the glass as he takes it and brings it to his lips. “Then what? Not your crowd?” He asks before taking a sip, his eyes never leaving you. 

“No, I suppose not..” You gingerly admit, not wanting to highlight the fact that you were completely out of your element. But judging by the way he looked at you, his silent demeanor practically eating you alive, he probably knew that already. — He places your glass back down, gently pushing it back your way as he wordlessly encourages you to drink more. You don’t know why you oblige. 

He takes the opportunity of you sipping on your drink to introduce himself. “Choi Beomgyu”, he says, the smirk on his lips widening as he does. The name fit him, oddly enough. Perhaps it was a bad idea to give out your own name. He was a stranger, not to mention one that Kayla had specifically warned you about not long ago. Still, this man intrigued you beyond limits.. 

Beomgyu, as his name was, suddenly leaned closer and you could almost smell the liquor on his breath. “Come on dollface, you must have a name?” The nickname he so casually dropped made your stomach flip. — You tell yourself that this was just a game of his. Taking Kayla’s words into consideration, not to mention the fact that he had girls draped over him minutes ago, this wasn’t the first time he chatted someone up. You would not make a fool of yourself and fall for such cheap tricks. 

He’s silent as he waits for you to answer, but when you merely avoid his gaze and sip on your drink, he chuckles. The laugh is pulled from deep within his chest and it sounds raspy when it rolls off his tongue. Beomgyu leans back, running a hand leisurely through his long hair. “Hard to charm I see.” 

You don’t answer, but you can’t help but watch as he rests his elbows against the bartop, his finger dragging just below his bottom lip as he regards you with intrigue. — “Not your type?” You retort, your response coming out somewhat short. It was hard to fathom any reasoning behind his strange interest in you. 

“Far from it”, Beomgyu hums, though his glimmering eyes betray the words coming out of his mouth. The lower half of his face pulls into a lopsided grin, “But I’m not opposed to trying new things.” 

Your first instinct was to scoff, to tell him to fuck off back to wherever he’d emerged from. It’s strange. You find yourself completely unable to. Instead you push your nearly finished drink toward him once more, and Beomgyu takes it as he brings it to his lips. — If he wasn’t opposed to trying new things, then who says you weren’t either?” 

“Tell me your name.” 

His breath is hot on your neck, coming in short pants as he slams his hips against yours. The alleway is dark and vacant, shielding the two of you from prying eyes. Shoved against the brick wall, you’re pliant in his grasp as Beomgyu’s hands roam your body. With your skirt pushed high above your hips, the metal of his rings feel cool against your thighs as his fingers dig into your soft flesh. 

Was this a good idea? — It didn’t matter. Your nails rake along his shoulders, pulling him impossibly close. Beomgyu chuckles against the crock of your neck, his lips leaving sloppy kisses over your skin, pulling it between his teeth. 

This was so unlike anything you’d ever done before. Not that you were a prude, or anything of the sort. But something like this, in a place like this, where anyone could walk by and with a mere stranger no less.. Whatever. You figured he was just another promiscuous man with no other intentions than the last. You would use it to your advantage tonight, or at least so you thought. 

But for every kiss he placed against your body, for every quiet whisper of praise that slipped from his tongue, you found yourself slowly losing your last semblance of control. Beomgyu was not like any of your previous partners, he was new, exciting, exotic even. Something you’d never had before, and now that you’d gotten a small taste, you felt far from satisfied. 

Why did he want to know your name? Why did it matter if you were to never see one another after tonight? Still, his silent request is made clear when he presses your lips together in a feverish kiss. You gasp out at the feeling of his hard cock as it buries inside of your aching cunt, your thighs trembling as they remain wrapped around his waist. 

“Dollface”, he exhales into the kiss, his mouth warm and wet against yours. And when he pulls back for air, your dazed eyes meet his as you brace your hands on his chest. Licking your lips, you inhale slowly before finally giving out your name, your most vulnerable piece of information. 

He smirks, clearly thrilled by the admission. For a split second you wondered if you’d done the right thing. Perhaps it had all been one grave mistake. If it was, you weren’t given time to ponder it as he reconnets your lips, this time with a passion unlike anything you’d ever felt before. 

And that was exactly how you became infatuated with Choi Beomgyu.

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[soobrat]

one way; cbg

part i | part ii | part iii

🖱️⤻ pairing; afab!reader x beomgyu 🖱️⤻ word count; 6.9k 🖱️⤻ genre; enemies 2 enemies, smut, & angst 🖱️⤻ synopsis; you liked soobin but he didn't like you back. you've come to terms with this and moved on, but beomgyu hasn't. he's very sure he's onto you 🖱️⤻ warnings; hate sex, mean!gyu, slut shaming, breath play, overstimulation, multiple orgasms, post orgasm torture (beomgyu rec), dubcon (just in case), blood (nothing crazy at all), pain play, breast play, biting, hair pulling, choking, spitting, unrequited crush, failed confession, you might hate mc?, takes a while for beommie to appear

⌨️⤻ this was very similar to stress relief, I'm aware. That's why it's not a two parter (liar) or a taehyun fic. alsoo while writing this I couldn't stop thinking about what the sex sounded like outside the door. Imagine soobin eavesdropping and being like "????"

"I think it sounds a little empty here." Soobin chews on his thumbnail as he fixates on the monitor in front of him. The LED lights in his room splash warm purple behind him. The bright desktop illuminated his upper body. His brows were furrowed, jaw clenching and unclenching. Eyes sharp as he examined the screen. Looking just as enchanting as ever.

"When in doubt, dump in some harmonies and background vocals. That's my motto, at least." You mumble, almost like a zombie. Your brain was on autopilot as you stared at him for way too long.

"Yeah, you said that already." Soobin laughs before looking over at you. Your eyes widen like a deer caught in headlights. He can sense the awkwardness as he focuses back on the screen.

"I feel like I'm harmonied out. I have no clue what to put here that doesn't sound repetitive."

You stare blankly at the screen. It took some genuine effort not to look at him again. You didn't want him to think you were weird, but the warm feeling you got whenever you looked at him was intoxicating.

"I dunno, I usually just test shit out until something sticks. I'm not professional, I just kinda wing it."

"I wouldn't say that. I've heard your work. You sound pretty professional to me."

Your heart begins beating prominently in your chest. Gulping, you try your damnedest not to look over at him even though it feels like you could explode. You can't tell whether this feeling sucked or was euphoric. You clench your fists over your jeans.

"A-are you okay? Are you feeling ill??" Soobin leans closer to you, worry evident in his voice.

"I'm okay..." your voice came out quieter than you intended to.

"Ah..." Soobin sounded a bit disheartened, so you peer over at him. It was hard to tell what he was thinking, but you swore you could see a hint of disappointment. Maybe that was just you being needlessly anxious again about every seemingly negative reaction someone might be having towards you.

Your suspicion only grew as time went on. He joked around with you less. He seemed really tense. His sentences were shorter. He barely ever made eye contact with you.

This continued for two weeks. You weren't sure you could take this much longer. You were losing sleep. Did you weird him out that day? Or could he see right through you and felt uncomfortable with your obvious crush? Either way, it was stressing you out to a worrying degree. This had to end.

You texted him to meet you on the roof of your apartment complex. It was obscured from anyone below with a camera and crazy zoom, and it'd be obvious if anyone followed the two of you. It was time to finally find out what the hell was going on. You were still stressed out, but a part of you was foolishly excited.

You even had a sweet dream that he accepted your confession. High off the wonderful feeling that dream gave you, you were all smiles. Nervous smiles, but smiles nonetheless. You sit on the floor next to the door when your jittery nerves came to be too much. Your ears perk up when the door clicks open. You shoot up, smoothing your hands over your clothes. Behind the door is Soobin, brows knit together in clear stress.

"Hi, sorry if you were busy." You smile at him, movement a bit frantic as you bow.

"No it's fine, this will be quick." Soobin's expression is stern, yet he fails to meet your eyes.

Your heart drops, mouth hanging agape. You stand there wordlessly, your hands fidgeting with each other. It felt like a dark cloud loomed over you, suddenly blocking out the sun. You already knew what he meant by that, and what he was going to say. Should you run? No...

You smile bitterly. "Ah, I see. You don't have to say anything else. I understand."

When Soobin finally looks at you, a dim feeling of hope sparks up. You immediately extinguish the feeling.

"Listen," You clear your throat, pushing down the growing feeling of mortification and sadness, "You don't have to worry about me anymore, or I guess my feelings. I know that you still need my help with the new song. I can be professional about that. If I ever make you feel uncomfortable again, just let me know, okay?" You force a wider smile. A part of you hoped that he would accept the offer to still work with you in case he changed his mind.

"Oh! Um... okay. I'm not sure about working with you again just yet." Soobin trails off, pity evident in his voice.

Of course. He can see right through you, you idiot.

"You're right. It's selfish of me to even think that would be a possibility." You laugh awkwardly, shifting the weight from one leg to the other. "Don't worry about it. You know my number so you can call me if you need anything. You don't have to worry about me having ulterior motives."

--🖱️▷

You stare at the screen of your phone, the blue light illuminating your face in your otherwise dark room. You go through your photos and delete any pictures of or with Soobin. Just when you guys would've gotten close, you screwed things up with your stupid crush. Now on top of everything Soobin had to deal with, he has to worry about someone who has constant access to him making him uncomfortable. Mr. Park would most likely make the two of you work together again against his will. You should know how this feels, yet you behaved around him so recklessly.

The following morning your manager wakes you up earlier than normal.

"It's a Soobin day, let's go!"

You freeze, eyes wide in shock.

"Soo–? I thought I was off today." Your voice is gruff. You didn't need this stress so early in the morning.

"Mr. Park says that Soobin hasn't been making much progress with his song."

Yeah, you know. It's all your fault.

"He's gonna have the two of you work together more often."

You scratch at your head. This was gonna be difficult to explain, but you tried anyway.

"I'm sorry, my manager woke me up really early this morning, that was the first time I've heard of this."

"No, no! It's fine, I understand. I don't think you're up to something." Soobin waves his hands frantically in front of him, eyes wide.

"Okay, good." You wipe imaginary sweat from your forehead.

"Let's get started."

You and Soobin were back to normal... almost. You could tell he was still a bit wary. He kept side-eyeing you, and it was a lot more awkward. You couldn't blame him, you were thirty percent sure there were still buried feelings. They don't go away that easily. You sigh as the track plays which causes Soobin to quickly pause it.

"What? Is there something wrong??" Soobin was just as frantic as always. You chuckle. "No, all I did was sigh."

His anxious disposition fades as he begins to laugh. "Don't scare me like that."

You both laugh before fading back into that damn awkward state.

"Listen, thank you for being understanding. I know how hard it can be to like someone and be turned down." Soobin says, a hint of guilt in his voice. You look over at him in shock. "You experienced unrequited love? Who are they? Are they blind?"

Soobin looks away, clearly flustered again.

"Oh! Sorry. Too soon? I probably sound crazy." You look away, cheeks hot.

"Y-you don't. It's fine, don't worry about it." The tone of Soobin's voice sounds like he's disappointed. Again.

The atmosphere became ten times more awkward than it was before. You have to take it slow. You really value Soobin as a friend. You can fix this. Seeing Soobin more often was actually perfect for you. You couldn't avoid him forever, so might as well rip the bandaid off now. You look in your bathroom mirror, rinsing off your mask.

Looking into your own reflection, you repeat I like Soobin and that needs to change.

You plant your hands firmly on your sink, taking a deep breath. You close your eyes, reflecting on your situation. You have to sit in such close proximity to Soobin. Feeling his warmth. Smelling his scent. Seeing his smile, ugh those fucking dimples. You inhale shakily, clenching your eyes shut as you start to imagine Soobin closing in on you. Soaked in hues of red, green, and blue. His face so close that your noses touch.

You force your eyes open, slapping yourself across the face. This isn't going well. If you were a normal human being, you'd be able to just put yourself on the market, go on blind dates, and meet guys at bars. No, instead you had to practice 12 hours a day. Eat rabbit food. Endure this torture.

You ball your hands into fists and squeeze them tightly, nails embedded into your palm. For a moment you really considered quitting. Quitting everything. They're taking way too long to finally stick you into a group anyway. All while still capitalizing on your pre-existing fame.

You place your head into your hands, sighing heavily. You shouldn't quit. You've come this far, and your manager says that debut is very close.

That's what you have to focus on. Debuting. Yeah, your crush on Soobin could get him in big trouble, but what about you? Your dreams haven't even started, yet you were about to throw them away because of some boy? You look up from your hands and into the mirror.

"I'm ___." You repeat as you look into the mirror. "I'm ___!"

--🖱️▷

You confidently walk into Soobin's room. He looks up, face changing from shock to confusion.

"You look... comfy." Soobin remarks. You rest your hands on your hips, smiling goofily.

"I noticed that you're always dressed in comfy clothes so I decided 'what the heck'," You plop into the chair next to his, "and now that I've done so I understand why you do.".

He can't help but laugh at your strange confidence. "Did you eat some good food or something?" Soobin asks, opening his music editing software.

"No, I'm not you." You scoff, rolling closer to the computer. "Let's get this song finished!"

And finish you did, the song sounds better than you anticipated coming into this. It was all thanks to one method you stuck to. Whenever you felt your heart swelling, you thought about one of the things you disliked about him. You had a whole list full.

He was very soft, which is something you would also say is a pro. However, what if you come home after a shitty day and wanted to blow off some steam? You may not get much dick nowadays, but you still know what you need to get off. Missionary ain't cutting it. After thinking about his first con, they just came naturally. These were things you shoved into the back of your mind to prevent your pristine view of him from being sullied. Now, it's what you needed. Seeing him as the bossy mom friend who's a bit stuck up sometimes really helped.

A week was all Soobin needed to realize things were back to normal. Instead of the uncomfortable amount of compliments you threw at him, so eager to please, you were a lot blunter. Even a bit too blunt sometimes. Soobin wasn't complaining, it was what he was used to with his members.

Soobin was comfortable with you again and his members started to get closer to you as well.

"The song sounds amazing. Thank the lord, Soobin's rough draft was so horrible." Yeonjun tilted his chin into the air to prevent the food in his mouth from spilling while he spoke. Laughter erupts around you, even from Soobin who's scratching the back of his head.

"I didn't want to say anything... but yeah it was pretty bad." You nod, hissing at your own honesty.

"You didn't want to say anything because you had a crush on him." Beomgyu mutters, stirring his drink. The rest of the members point and laugh at you as you sit there, shocked. You had grown accustomed to the jokes, growing a thick skin after it wasn't as topical. To say it out loud would be a level of confrontation you weren't ready for, but you were pretty sure Beomgyu wasn't saying it in a joking manner. A part of you thought that he was actually putting you on the spot for some reason. But he was Beomgyu, he was a goofball. Plus, it's not like you still had a crush on Soobin.

"Beomgyu, I'm starting to feel like you don't like me or something." You laugh to offset any suspicions of an accusation, but you dart your eyes at him to watch his reaction. When you see his straight face staring back at you, your smile drops.

"What's up with this atmosphere?" Taehyun asks nervously.

"I just got chills..." Kai adds, cowering away from Beomgyu as if he was omitting cold air. Beomgyu ignores his members, taking a sip from his drink and keeping his eyes on you.

"I'm sorry about Beomgyu, I'm not sure what his problem is." Soobin sighs once you're back in his room. The two of you didn't even have a song to produce anymore, you were just enjoying each other's company.

"It's fine. Why are you even apologizing, you didn't do it." You snort as you nudge his arm. What you really wanted to say is that you understood Beomgyu's issue. If you said that out loud, you were scared that Soobin would think there was something to worry about, and there isn't. So you keep it to yourself and keep your distance from Beomgyu.

You did a pretty good job, only saying hi whenever you guys were in a room alone. Ignoring how he stared blankly at you and ignored your greeting. Laughed at his "jokes" that were just thinly veiled attacks on your character. Even though you remained friendly, you made sure not to stay in a room with him too long. Scurrying out before the members could leave you alone with him. You thought this would work in your favor, but it seemed like he was growing colder. His "jokes" no longer had a veil. He was just straight-up accosting you. 

"It must be nice cooped up in Soobin's room alone where no one can call you out on your shit." His words seeped into your veins and slowly poisoned you. All with a little smug smile on his face.

"Beomgyu! Cut it out!" Soobin stands up, fed up with his accusations. You raise your hands, signaling for Soobin to calm down and sit back in his chair. "It's fine-" You say quietly.

"No, it's not! If you've got something to say then say it." Soobin cuts his eyes at the younger male. Finally, the anger that Beomgyu was feeling the entire time was reflected on his face. His face twisted in resentment and a bit of pity. He scoffs.

"You're the second oldest, yet you're so naïve." 

Soobin grips the younger male by his shirt and you have to physically pry him off. "Soobin! Stop!"

"You should be saying this to him not me!" He looks at you in disbelief before turning his attention back to Beomgyu. "You think you know what you're talking about but you don't. Stay out of our business."

"Maybe you think I don't." Beomgyu keeps his eyes trained on Soobin as his finger points toward you. "But she does. Why else do you think she hasn't stuck up for herself." 

All of the members look at you with confusion in their eyes. You gulp, feeling like you were standing in a dark room with one lone spotlight beaming down on you. 

"I-I... I just... I don't want to cause any trouble-"

"Bullshit." He spat before leaving the room. He had a right to be worried about his friend, and that's why you didn't say anything. You didn't realize how guilty that made you look, though. The members keep their eyes on you, carefully watching as you fiddle with your fingers. 

"I'm sorry... I really was trying to prevent any conflict," You sigh, failing to properly explain yourself, "I just keep digging a deeper hole."

"No, I know you more than he does. I can say confidently that I know you're not scheming behind my back. He's just a stubborn little brat." Soobin huffs, still fuming from the exchange.

Without his members staring you down your brain was quieter. Able to focus on all your worries more vividly in turn. You squeeze your eyes shut. "I don't want to come in between you guys. Please talk to him once you both calm down."

"He's the one that needs to–"

"Please? He's just looking out for you because he cares about you." You press your lips into a thin line, hoping it’s not too late.

-🖱️▷

"We talked and he wants to speak to you alone." annoyance is evident in Soobin's features as he stares at his monitor. Clenching his jaw, but this time not in concentration.

"R-really? Why?"

"I don't know." He throws his arms in the air, dropping them back to the desk shortly after. "He just insisted on trusting him. I don't."

You hug your body with a troubled expression tugging at your features. It really sucked hearing that he doesn't trust Beomgyu. That he trusts you more. He's only known you for less than a year. He's known Beomgyu for at least four. They were pretty close before you came along, and the thought of you ruining their relationship made you feel horrible. All because of a stupid crush.

"I'll talk to him."

Soobin tries to talk you out of it, insisting that you did nothing wrong and that he needs to stop being an asshole. You try to look for another way to explain how you feel but come up short. You sigh, deciding to reveal your thoughts. "If hanging out with you guys is ruining your relationship, I’d rather stay away altogether."

Soobin’s annoyance at Beomgyu fades after your confession. His words escape his brain as quickly as they appear. He’s realizing now how horrible it must feel to come in between friends. 

“I want to fix this.” You add on, hoping he’ll come around. You chew on your lip, tightening your arms around your body as Soobin deliberates. He releases a hefty sigh.

"Okay. I understand." There’s a hint of stubbornness still lingering but he forces it to the wayside. You notice his inner turmoil and pat him on his back before standing up from your chair. He tells you that Beomgyu's in his room alone. You knock on the door and a tight voice beckons you in. When you slowly open it, you see Beomgyu at his computer. 

"Close the door behind you." he says, not looking your way. His brows are furrowed, and you can’t tell if it’s because he’s aggravated or focused. You oblige, waiting for him to say something. He stands from his computer chair wordlessly and crosses his arms before you. 

"I think you should stop coming around here." the words leave his mouth like they were nothing. Your heart drops, but you really didn't want to argue.

"I don't agree, Beomgyu." Though you know leaving might be the only option if all else fails, you selfishly still want to be here. You enjoy their company.

"So you think you've done nothing wrong?" he derides and you groan. "I never said that. I did make Soobin uncomfortable in the past and I was wrong for doing so." You finally say the words out loud and even after all this time they weigh on you. You hope it’s enough but looking at the determination on his face, you know it’s not.

"So you understand that it's fucked up that we should even worry about this? You even have the other members worried now.” His words are harsh and he puts no effort into sugarcoating them with his tone or expression. His eyes beat down on you as he hurls the words at you. 

They give you pause, reconsidering your dynamic with the others until now. “They what? That can’t be right.” They seemed a little awkward yesterday after Beomgyu’s accusation, but it couldn’t be that serious. Your face pinches, trying to clear your thoughts but he keeps bombarding you with his onslaught of attacks.

“And what about you avoiding me? Just admit that you’re hiding from the truth.” He crowds you until you’re backed against the wall. “N-no it’s because–”

“It’s obvious you’re guilty, but now there’s no running away. It’s time to tell the truth about your motives and leave us the fuck alone.” You flinch at his words, a glint of fire starting behind your eyes without your consent.

“I keep avoiding you because you’re a fucking asshole who constantly shits on me.” You clench your eyes shut as you shoot the words at him. You really didn't want to feed into to this. You throw your fists against the wall behind you, heaving as more frustration fills you up before you can stop it. Beomgyu steps away to chuckle and you get a moment to breathe. But then he’s back to hovering over you with a glare as cold as ice. 

“I’m a what?”

All you can do is breathe him in and look at him, he’s giving you no other choice. When your eyes wander he just moves back into your line of vision. Is this how he intends to get his way? “You’re an asshole–”

“I’m an asshole for telling you how it is?” He steps closer until he’s completely immersed in your bubble. The look of confusion on his face illustrates just how stupid he thinks you sound. You try to speak again but he interrupts you for the umpteenth time. 

“Just leave. No one wants you here.”

“You don’t want me here! You can’t force me not to hang out with my friends.” You shoot back incredulously. 

“Oh, your friends, right? It’s not that you’re so lonely and desperate for a boyfriend that you’re following Soobin around? You look pathetic. Just know that when Soobin gets tired of you, none of us are gonna jump to take his place.” The feeling of his breath fanning over your face fans the flames of your rage. Never in your life had someone said something so disrespectful to your face and barely blink an eye.

“How dare you–”

“You’re not gonna find a boyfriend here.” He sneers, smirking down at you like you’re a joke.

“Stop fucking interrupting me!” You erupt, shoving against his chest. He barely moves and he’s still all you can smell and see and hear. You can’t get away from his relentless attacks. He’s telling you to leave and yet he won’t back up so that you can breathe. “Soobin finished the song and yet you’re here all the time, hoping he’ll let you hop on his dick–”

Seeing red, you cock back before striking him across the face. The impact is louder than you expect, your anger had gotten the best of you. In the dim lighting of his room, you can still tell that you left a red mark on his cheek. This was really bad, if they didn’t think you were guilty before, they did now. Even Soobin would have to see Beomgyu’s side now. Before you can apologize or even fully panic your body is being shoved into the wall. He holds your hands above your head as a vein in his jaw quirks.

Your anger is instantly back in place. “Let me go.” You warn with your voice low.

“I didn’t think you had it in you.” There he goes, crowding you even further until his forehead is touching yours. You didn’t think it was possible for you to get this angry. You still for a moment as you connect the dots. He’s goading you. It’s evident by the sly smile on his face. Now all his members will see you as unhinged and Soobin will be broken free from the spell Beomgyu’s convinced you have him under. 

“What the fuck is wrong with you? What have I ever done to you?” You rip your arms free only for him to grab your wrists again and hold them tighter this time.

“You’re just another one of those sneaky girls who try to weasel their way into our lives. You pretend to be all innocent, only wanting to be friends, and then you show your true colors. Just another desperate trainee. And you,” He gathers your wrists into one of his large hands before poking your forehead with his finger, “you keep sticking around like a parasite and actually managed to fool them. But I’m not stupid. I know a tacky groupie when I see one.”

You weren’t like that at all. You genuinely enjoyed their company and you weren’t even a fan beforehand. Even if you were, your feelings for Soobin were real. They weren’t built off of delusion, you fell for who he was as a person. Beomgyu has the power to paint you out as a crazed fan who managed to sneak past their defenses and the thought scared you. This wouldn’t just ruin your relationship with Soobin, if it gets back to your manager or any executives at the company you could get in serious trouble. You could possibly kiss debuting goodbye.

“You’re wrong and you’re too stubborn to see it. You refuse to listen to anyone, even your own leader!” You should probably lighten your tone but you were through trying to appeal to him. 

“I’m stubborn? Says the one who can’t take no for an answer.”

“I did take no for an answer! You weren’t even there so how would you know?!”

“Soobin told us you kept pursuing him afterwards, you know?” 

Your fire is snuffed out in a singular whoosh of air. Your mouth drops open, but there are no rebuttals you have prepared to throw back at him. Imagining Soobin venting to his members about how annoying you are strikes a chord so sour you could cry. “Everyone knows how embarrassing you are.” He snickers and chips away at your dwindling composure. 

His face is so close, you can feel the skin on his nose and his forehead when he leans closer to tempt you over that edge. You can smell his lotion, his toothpaste, his makeup, his cologne. It’s just him everywhere and you want it to stop. Your brain is overloaded and you’re blinded by your rage. You want to do something to him, something to ruin his face and his skin, but the message gets screwed up somewhere amidst your heightened emotions. 

You crush your lips against his and he staggers backward only for a moment before freeing your hands and pushing you against the wall again. You suck harshly on his bottom lip and to make things more absurd, he lets you. Whether this was strengthening his case against you or not was entirely lost on you. You wanted to grab him, choke him, something. With a gasping breath you grip the nape of his hair and tug hard, sinking your teeth into his flesh. You pull back with hot tears dripping from your lashes as you glare up at his dark eyes. “I hate you.” You whisper shakily.

He heaves for a few seconds before initiating the kiss himself. His lips, his tongue, his teeth, you feel him everywhere just kissing and licking and biting you. It burns you so hot you think you’ll ignite. He draws your lip back with his teeth, biting hard enough to draw blood and a sharp shriek from you. You yank his head back by his hair and he grunts. 

“You fucking bitch.” He hisses, exposing his hatred for you clear as day. The slap you deliver makes his eyes go wild before he’s grabbing you by your shirt. The sound of the fabric ripping is loud and you gasp. You can’t get a word in before he’s ripping the front of your bra in half and his brutish hands are fondling your breasts. His lips are softer when he catches yours this time but only because he’s focused on sinking his nails into your flesh. You moan into his mouth, ashamed of how much the pain he’s causing is turning you on. 

One hand grabs his face while the other grabs his neck. You drag your nails down his cheekbone and push your fingertips into each side of his neck. He inhales shallowly before restraining your arms again. With his grip on your wrists he yanks you closer. “If you know what’s good for you, you’d cut that out.” He growls, lip snarling and breath ragged. “You already put your hands on me three times and this time you left a mark. You’re not very bright, are you?” He asks as if he’s genuinely puzzled.

You poke your bottom lip out with your tongue. “You left a mark too, jackass. And how are you gonna explain my bra and shirt, huh? It’s my word against yours.” You breathe into a cocky laugh. 

“They won’t believe you. I told you, they’re getting suspicious of you.” He’s putting up a front but you can tell he’s not confident in that theory. You try and tug your wrists free. “Well then let me go and let’s find out.”

“You’re really willing to ruin your career before it even starts?” He’s getting progressively more anxious which makes you smirk. His hand shoots up before you can make a snide remark, wrapping around your throat. He squeezes hard immediately, his thumb digging uncomfortably into your muscles. Your mouth drops open as you squirm against the wall. Your free hands grip his shirt to perplexingly pull him closer. “Shut the fuck up.” He watches you intently as you gradually lose oxygen, waiting a little after you start to panic before letting you go. 

Your hands are instantly back in his hair and pulling him forward so your mouths crash together. Your noses bump and teeth clink but it only makes the both of you more riled up. You tug his head backward, not detaching from the kiss as you push him to his computer chair. He trips and falls into it and you fall on top of him. Your hips start rutting against him and he groans into the kiss. His fingers find your nipples again and he squeezes until pain shoots down your legs. He continues to pinch harder and harder until you’re making pained whimpers and more tears spring to your eyes. 

Irked, you grab his face and squish his cheeks, lifting from the kiss to lick up the blood on his cheeks. You grind down on him with a shuddering breath when he starts to twist your sore nipples. “I wanna make you bleed again.” You laugh, officially brought to hysterics by the man below you.

“Hit me or scratch me again and you’ll regret it.” His voice is deeper than before and you can feel him growing under you. Before you felt ashamed but now you can see the vision. You ride his cock, shove him so deep inside you that his mind goes blank. He cums but you don’t stop. You just keep milking him until his eyes roll back and the only noises he can make are strained groans. The idea translates to pleasure that has you shoving a hand down to unbutton his jeans.

“See?” He raises his hands in the air, watching you fish his cock from his pants. “I knew you were a desperate slut.” You grip his shaft and pull a salacious sound from his throat. He grabs you by the throat and pulls your ear by his mouth.

“All because you feel worthless without a celebrity to cling onto.” He whispers before licking your earlobe into his mouth and sinking his teeth into it. For a moment, your anger drains and his words dawn on you. You almost believe him. You huff a derisive laugh and you don’t even know if it’s at Beomgyu or yourself. Beomgyu is everything Soobin isn’t. It’s a con and disappointingly a pro. He’s impolite, impulsive, and hard-headed… but as you stare into his sharp glare you start to understand your eagerness to sit on his cock. Soobin was easy to swallow but Beomgyu’s intricate eyes spare you no pity or comfort. “I don’t care as long as I cum by the end of it.” He says with a smug grin.

“You can insult me all you want,” You stand from the chair and shimmy your sweats and underwear off while still maintaining eye contact. “but I know who I am.” You climb back on his lap, positioning him at your entrance before grabbing his shoulders with a smirk. 

“Nice character development. Finally accepting you’re a groupie.”

You brush his jab off with a scoff. There’s no way either of you can make a case against the other without painting you both as insane. His crusade against you was paused at the moment. You have him right where you want him. “I’m not. I’m ___.” You smile. 

Beomgyu immediately laughs at your proclamation, shifting to a hiss when you sink down on him. He grabs hold of your hips to take control and increase the speed. “You’re letting me ride you while claiming to hate me. Something isn’t adding up.” He tries to bite back but the sound of your pussy sliding over his cock makes him mutter a swear.

“You may be a superstar out there, but in here? Right now? You’re just a tool for me to get off.”

He moves both hands back up to your throat, giving you back the reigns as you laugh triumphantly. “That’s right. I like it when you’re rough with me.” You squeeze out before swirling your hips in circles. His resolve crumbles more and more as you ride him and it’s a delight to watch. He chokes you harder, familiarly squeezing until your vision spots out before releasing and letting you gasp and sputter. “You like that?”

“Uh huh.” You fake a whimper, making a show of how your hips swing. Knowing exactly how to rile him up, you slap him again. Seeing the anger flare up you get a rush, reveling in the slap he delivers back. “The fuck did I tell you?”

You spit on his face and he snatches your hips up again. He starts slamming his cock into you with a vice grip on you, digging his fingertips deep into the flesh of your ass. You yelp involuntarily before covering your mouth.

“What? Worried they’ll hear you and confirm what you were after all along?” He spreads your cheeks wide, peeking over your shoulder to watch how your asshole flutters. Even if you cover up your moans, there’s no way they don’t hear his balls smacking against your ass from in the hallway. You think– hope you’re hallucinating when you hear the door click open.

“Okay guys, what is–” Soobin’s voice cuts off with a surprised noise. You turn your head as far as you can and catch him covering your bottom halves with his hand. “I guess this means you guys made up now?” He asks, stress laced into his words for an entirely different reason. 

Neither of you answer, you just gawk at Soobin until he rolls his eyes and closes the door. You stay stuck there for a moment until it occurs to you. A wide smile stretches across your face as you turn to face Beomgyu again. He shoots you an annoyed look. “What?”

“You can’t sabotage me anymore. Who’s gonna take you seriously now?” 

“If anything you’re proving my point. In their eyes you just managed to seduce me instead of Soobin.”

“Is that what happened?” You grab his face and smush it with a mocking coo. “I seduced the big bad wolf?” He shakes his face free from your grip and squeezes your ass again. “I guess we’ll see, huh, Beommie?”

You moan out when he slams you down to meet his thrusts. “Trying to shut me up?” Your eyes threaten to roll back feeling his cock in your stomach. You curse under your breath, trying to steady yourself on his shoulders. “It won’t work.”

You throw challenge after challenge hoping he’d get as brutish as you want him to. He hisses at you to shut up. You just talk over him until his lip snarls and he’s yanking you by your hair over to the bed. He tosses you against the side of it before lifting you by your torso and shoving you face down into the mattress. “I told you to shut up.” He growls.

“Fuck me Beommie.” You peer to the side to purr but he shoves your face back into his covers. He realigns himself before restraining your wrists behind your back with one hand. The messy position has one of your legs dangling off the bed but Beomgyu doesn’t fix it, he just slams into you. He shoves you further into the mattress, making sure to keep his hand on the back of your head to keep you quiet. You curl your toes as his dick shoots deep inside you in a relentless pursuit to pound your cervix. Your oxygen starts to run dry again and your eyes fully roll back as you thrash against him. Just a second longer feels like an eternity as you panic for air but he eventually pulls you back up.

“You fucking dick.” You breathe after a harsh fit of coughs.

“Still got shit to say?” He shoves your head back down and slows his hips. Each slam makes your legs twitch until your entire body is trembling like a cold puppy. His cock fucking you full so many times has you overstimulated before even cumming. But it crashes down upon you once your oxygen runs just about dry. You jolt violently with an intense climax and as a warning that he needs to pull you up. He does so, holding you up by your hair as you tremble and clench around his cock. “That’s right, just stay quiet and cum on my dick.”

With all the strength you can muster after your high, you break free from his grip and flip around. He struggles to restrain you and your struggle back until he’s pushing your legs by your head and you reach to grab him and catch his shirt. You yank him closer and capture his lips in a messy kiss. You catch his lip this time and bite down on it as he sinks back into you. You let go and let him drive his tongue into your mouth. Your tongues wrestle, sharing your wanton moans as his cock melts into your hot, wet hole. 

You can tell it’s getting to him when his moans get needier. You slip your legs under his arms and wrap them around his hips. You push him further into you, watching his face clench as he’s fully submerged in you. You press your core flush against him and grind your hips into him. You’re dripping so much it’s leaking onto his bed and he can feel it on the tops of his thighs. With one stuttering ‘fuck’ you know he’s gone. You suck on his tongue until his hips are smacking harshly into yours. Each trembling jerk of his hips shoots another ribbon of semen onto your walls. He tries to draw back but you’re holding him still with your legs.

“P-please–”

“Does it hurt, Beommie?” You moan, grinding your hips again. His face clenches tighter as unrestrained moans pour from his ruined lips. You wish to ruin them more but he looks so sexy when he’s in pain. You give him the same languid swing of your hips as you did riding him and watch the sweat roll down his forehead. “I can’t, I can’t–”

With a loud grunt he slams into you again, burying his head in your shoulder. The high of your perceived win over Beomgyu drives you to your actual high as you cum around him again. You keep your shaky legs locked around him until an urgent wail fills your ears and your pussy is being filled again. "Please! Please!" You intend on keeping him locked in longer but he pries your legs off him.

You waste no time pushing him off of you and peeling off your tattered shirt and bra. You use the fabric of your t-shirt to wipe off your legs and your mound. Beomgyu comes up behind you to yank the shirt from your hands, glaring at you as he does so. He cleans up his member and thighs before tossing the shirt.

“Get out.”

“My pleasure. Are we still telling them our sides or…”

“Just get out. You better not still be here when I get out of the shower.” He ties a towel around his hips and bumps your shoulder as he walks past. You steal a pair of sweatpants and a shirt for now, planning to return it as soon as possible because the thought of having his clothes in your wardrobe made you physically ill.

As it stands, he still tried to sabotage you and Soobin’s friendship and possibly your career, but it seems he admitted defeat. You glance at his mirror on your way out. Just as you thought, you know exactly who you are.

likes and reblogs are very appreciated! 🖱️⤻ txt masterlist

[smileysuh]

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🔮 about. I’m a 25 year old canadian who mainly thirsts for SVT and NCT. this blog is a safe space, my requests are closed, but feel free to send me an ask and i’ll get to it when i can :)

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NCT 

complete masterlist by member

SVT 

complete masterlist by member

GOT7

Open Season : Mark & Jinyoung & Jackson ↳5.2k reader insert smut ↳fuck buddy au, poly, angst, slow burn ↳Synopsis: Jaebum accidentally says that his fuck buddy can fuck who they want, which apparently means it’s open season for the entire Hyung Line to get with her.

Open Season pt2 : Mark & Jinyoung & Jackson & Jaebum ↳8.2k reader insert smut ↳fuck buddy au, poly, angst, slow burn ↳Synopsis: Jaebum finds out about the reader sleeping with his friends and things get smutty.

A Lil Flipper : Mark ↳3k, reader insert smut ↳established relationship, pregnancy kink ↳Synopsis: At a Tuan family event, you realize Mark is the man you want to make babies with. Is it the best decision? Probably not, but who cares. 

PubGMarkT : Mark  ↳2.6k, reader insert smut ↳cam baby au, fuck buddy au, one sided pining ↳Synopsis: camgirl!reader fucks Mark while he plays video games. 

beommie : Jaebeom ↳3.7k, reader insert smut ↳cam baby au, fuck buddy au, one sided pining ↳Synopsis: The boys in the cam room chat are quick to make fun of Jaebeom’s ‘furry con attendee’ status, so he makes them eat their words. 

TheJinyoung : mean dom! Jinyoung ↳4.7k, reader insert smut ↳cam baby au, fuck buddy au, one sided pining ↳Synopsis: Jinyoung isn’t too interested in playing for the camera, but he is more than happy to make you work for it. 

Hungry : Jackson & Lucas (NCT) ↳3.4k, smut, reader insert ↳fuck buddy au, pwp ↳Synopsis: Jackson notices his friend Lucas is into you, so he makes sure his friend’s dreams comes true. 

NiceGuyJohnny & TheJinyoung: Jinyoung & Johnny (NCT) ↳7.5k, smut, reader insert ↳Cam Baby au, fuck buddy au, one sided pining, rough sex ↳Synopsis: A little romantic trip with Haechan leaves two of your primary doms feeling a little... jealous? possessive? downright insane? And they’re going to make sure you know it.

BTS

Four Days: Suga & Namjoon ↳4.8k Sugamon smut ↳established relationship ↳Synopsis: You have an essay to write for school and Namjoon enforces a ‘no sex’ rule until it’s complete. Suga plays along with it but it’s clear you’re all getting impatient. 

Nefarious: yandere! Tae & JK  ||  moodboard ↳7.4k Yandere Taekook smut ↳yandere au ↳Synopsis: You know you’re being followed. It’s been months. You finally take matters in your own hands to draw out the man following you. Turns out its not one man but two, and they’re completely in love with you. ↳inspo tags: Tae, Jk, Taekook

TaeTae: Taehyung  ↳4.6k, smut ↳cam baby au, fuck buddy au, one sided pining ↳Synopsis: Part of the CamBaby series, where camgirl!reader hasn’t seen Taehyun in a while and he shows her how much he missed her. 

Quickie: Taehyung   ↳2k, smut ↳established relationship ↳Synopsis: Taehyung shouldn’t be allowed to wear a suit in the morning before work because it looks way too god damned sexy. 

Ateez

Mine: Seonghwa & Hongjoong  ↳3.4k, reader insert, smut ↳fuck buddies ↳Synopsis: When your fuck buddy Hongjoong gets jealous of who you’re talking to at an event, you prove to him that you’re not only single, but can fuck whoever you want... by dragging Seonghwa into the cross fire.

Hyungs: Seonghwa & Hongjoong & San ↳4.7k, reader insert, smut ↳polyamory ↳Synopsis: Hongjoong and Seonghwa share a girlfriend, and when San shows interest in her, they realize that maybe keeping her to themselves is a little selfish. 

8th Grade: Yunho & Mingi ↳8.9k, reader insert, smut, fluff.  ↳best friends to lovers, polyamory, covid ↳Synopsis: They’ve always just been your best friends. But Covid quarantine is making you all way too horny. 

Jealousy: Hongjoong ↳2.5k, reader insert, smut. ↳Synopsis: Your boyfriend is a little touchy about how close you are to his friends Mingi and Yunho.

Panini: Yunho & Mingi ↳11.8k, reader insert, smut, fluff. ↳best friends to lovers, polyamory, covid ↳Synopsis: With covid stretching on for what feels like forever, and Mingi’s mood in rapid decline, you move in to the two bedroom apartment with your two best friends, where seemingly constant tinder notifications on everyone’s phones remind you constantly of how horribly single you all are. 

your hand: Yunho  ↳6.6k, reader insert, smut, fluff. ↳tattooist!ateez, receptionist!yn ↳Synopsis: : it’s a classic parlour love story: big tattoo man finds new receptionist cute, but he can’t talk to her until something totally avoidable happens that brings them together out of his own sheer stupidity- that kind of shindig ;) 

Yunhoe : Yunho ↳5.5k, smut, reader insert ↳cam baby au, fuck buddy au, one sided pining ↳Preview: Your phone is so far away- and you’re too cock drunk to think much about donations or the chat room- but you do your best to be as vocal as possible, knowing that moans will make up for the fact that Yunho obviously could care less about good visual shots. 

Monsta x

Pillow Prince : Hyungwon & I.M ↳3.7k, smut, reader insert ↳established relationship au ↳Synopsis: You and Changkyun have been dating forever, and have a spicy reputation. You both figure movie night with Hyungwon can be a lot more fun if less clothes are involved

Tease : Shownu & Joohoney ↳5.6k, smut, reader insert ↳best friends to lovers, baby fever, pregnancy kink ↳Synopsis: Your best friends come to rescue you from a family event where you’re left all but baby sitting the kids running around. Although they only stay for a little while before helping you escape, it’s enough to give them both intense baby fever. 

Accidentally In Love : Jooheon - in the reserve ↳16.4k, smut, Original Character ↳non idol au, strangers to lovers, slow burn ↳Synopsis: When Maxine arrived in Mexico at her hotel, where she’s booked a communal room with another girl, she finds out that the hotel booked her in a male room due to her name (Max). At first, rooming with a male stranger is daunting, but soon it becomes evident that Jooheon is exactly the kind of person Maxine needs to get her to enjoy her time in Mexico… especially since lots of activities are offered cheaper in ‘couples packages’.

Pentagon

Choices : Yuto & Kino & Wooseok ↳9.5k, smut, reader insert ↳Besties to lovers, polyamory, rip the bandaid off ↳Synopsis: A night with your three best friends takes an unexpected turn when you admit you’ve been trying to decide which member of Pentagon’s ‘Aquarius Line’ you like most.

[cherryeol04]

Dreams Come True

Genre: Humor, Fairy tale, romance ? Pairing: JackGyeom Word Count: 2.6K Summary: Yugyeom and BamBam sneak out for a little late night parting.

Yugyeom sighed as he turned from his desk, looking at BamBam from across the room. The other was smiling so widely at him, eyes wide and innocent as if he hadn’t just asked BamBam to commit such a sin as sneaking out of their houses and going to a club. “No.”

“Oh come on! It’ll be fun! There’s gonna music, dancing, and hot guys. You like all three of those things.” BamBam huffed, arms crossing over his chest. “Besides, you could dress up too.” He offered, catching Yugyeom’s attention. The thought of dressing up was very tempting but it wasn’t something Yugyeom was entirely sure was a good idea. He had never gone out in public and let others see just how pretty he could be. And here was BamBam suggesting that he go out to a club that would surely be packed with at least 50 strangers.

“I don’t know BamBam.”

“Okay, well how about you change there? The bathrooms are super nice for a club, surprisingly. It’ll be fine! I would never take you someplace where you would get like double your daily whipping or anything.” BamBam waves his hand and Yugyeom winced at the comment. He knew BamBam didn’t mean anything bad by it, but it still hurt. It was just too real of a statement.

“Bam -“

“Please?” BamBam practically pleader, voice raising a pitch higher than what Yugyeom was used to.

“Okay fine. Let me pack my clothes.” Getting up, Yugyeom grabbed his bag and opened it as he made his way to his closet. The clothes he wanted to wear were all the way in the back, safe and hidden from sight. He didn’t have many, but he had enough. A soft, baby blue crop top was selected and paired with his black pleated skirt - Yugyeom’s favorite. He didn’t really have any nice shoes to go with it, so he grabbed whatever he thought might look nice and just prayed he wasn’t going to end up looking stupid.

Stuffing the clothes in his bag, he closed his closet and turned to face BamBam only to be pelted in the face by a stick.

Where did he get a stick from?!

“Yugyeom, you ready?”

“You’re supposed to throw sticks at windows to get their attention, not people’s heads!” Yugyeom complained.

“Same difference.” The nonchalant shrug had Yugyeom pouting and he shook his head.

“Rude. But I’m ready, let’s get going.” His eyes followed as BamBam moved to his window and opened it. He raised a brow in question and BamBam snorted.

“We’re going clubbing, do really think I want to explain that to your parents?”

He made a fair point. Nodding, he walked over and watched carefully as BamBam snuck out first, grabbing the siding and rain gutters as support as he scaled down from the second story. Nervously, Yugyeom slipped out as well and not so gracefully flailed to grab things as he all but fell from his window. The good thing was, he didn’t break anything. He was just very, very sore.

“A spider monkey, you are not.” BamBam laughed.

“Ahaha. So funny.” The sarcasm ever-present as he slowly stood up. “Lead the way, Edward.”

BamBam rolled his eyes and started walking over to the bike parked by the mailbox. "Your chariot awaits, princess." Mounting the bike - or rather, a very old and rusted looking two-seater moped - and looked over at Yugyeom, waiting for him. "Well?"

"That's a death trap, Bam." Yugyeom frowned as he approached cautiously, eyeing the piece of machinery.

"It is not! Use your imagination, you ungrateful brat! It's better than walking!" BamBam gave an indignant huff, arms crossing over his chest as he waited for the other.

"Why are we still friends?" Yugyeom asked and frowned.

"Because I'm amazing. Now get in!"

"In? Don't you mean on?"

"Nope." BamBam threw Yugyeom a goofy smile as he started the moped. Yugyeom gave a heavy sigh, unable to resist his fate. Climbing onto the back of the moped, he made himself comfy in the second seat, arms barely wrapping around BamBam as the other pushed the kickstand up and started down the road. Yugyeom truly wondered why he had agreed to this, but a part of him was looking forward to it. It had been a while since they had last gone out and did anything together and even then it was pretty tame compared to them sneaking out of his own house to go to a club. Yugyeom was living on the wild side today. The drive to the club wasn't particularly lengthy, though they did make a pit stop at a gas station a block from the club so Yugyeom could change. BamBam claimed it was because they wouldn't let him in with the current casual clothes he was wearing, but Yugyeom was almost sure the other was lying. Why? He didn't know, but he just had a gut feeling. It was pretty embarrassing to walk into the gas station dressed as a boy and to walk out dressed as a girl and feeling absolutely beautiful. He was thankful no one commented on his attire, though he did receive a few looks - none of which were in disgust - that sent shivers down his spine and he rushed out towards BamBam and got back on the moped, and they headed off to the club.

The line for the club wrapped around the building practically. It was one of the more popular gay clubs they had in the city, nestled near the heart and surrounded by a very large and positive gay community. Yugyeom never failed to feel safe when he was there, but being there was few and far between anymore. He was mostly limited to the areas surrounding downtown. Small little communities that sometimes were accepting and other times weren't. The one he was apart of was far from accepting and one of the many reasons he did his best to hide who he truly was from them.

BamBam managed to find a parking spot and after making sure everything was turned off, and Yugyeom assuring him that no one would want to steal his rust bucket piece of trash moped, they headed to the front. They were greeted with a lot of groans and complaints from people who were standing in line and the lord only knows how long they have been there, waiting for this chance to get inside. But for BamBam, that was nothing as he waltzed right up to the scary-looking bouncer who had two eye moles right above his eye and was actually very handsome looking. Though Yugyeom was far more intimidated by him than attracted.

"Hey Beommie!"

"That's hyung to you, brat." the male said and BamBam rolled his eyes.

"Hey there Beommie hyung. Better?" he asked and smirked. "Anyway, Yugyeom and I would like to get in please."

"IDs." the male said and held out his hand. Yugyeom's eyes widened and he glanced at BamBam nervously, hand moving to shyly grip at his wrist.

"Bam, I don't think-"

"It's cool dude." BamBam said and smiled at Yugyeom. "I got this." he assured him. Reaching down, he unzipped his partially opened bag fully and reached in with both hands. Carefully, he removed a small kitten who seemed to be very upset that it was woken, looking around with narrowed eyes. How long had that cat been in his bag?? Yugyeom was actually very worried for the cat as BamBam held it out. "She has no name, but I found her wandering around my neighborhood. Treat her well, hyung."

The male raised a brow, staring for only a moment at the cat before taking her from BamBam's grip and pulling her close to his chest, stroking her head. "Precious little baby. Don't you worry, you're going to love living with me and my other cats." he said with a grin. Shifting on his feet, he moved and motioned for the two to go inside. Smiling, BamBam grabbed Yugyeom's hand and dragged him inside, and immediately they were overcome with a sweltering heat that only a packed club could have. The music was loud, bass throbbing, and bodies were moving. Through the flashing blue and red lights, Yugyeom could see people standing at the various bars set up and standing tables near the sides of the rooms. The middle was filled with people, grinding and dancing to the beat of the music. Yugyeom was honestly surprised to see others there, wearing clothes similar to his. Some were clearly men, but others were questionable, with curves that Yugyeom didn't think a male body could even possess. And yet it was staring him right in the face. It certainly did help to qualm his anxiety about being in public and dressed the way he was.

"Alright my friend." BamBam grinned as he stared at the other. "This is where we part ways. But keep your phone on you and check it, cause we need to leave and be home by midnight." he said. Patting Yugyeom's shoulder, he walked forward and disappeared into the crowd of dancers, leaving Yugyeom to fend for himself. It took nearly a minute before Yugyeom finally descended into the crowd. He wasn't sure where he was going or what he was going to do, but he was going to figure something out. If anything, he was at least going to dance - a passion he had for as long as he could remember.

Hours passed, or what seemed like hours and maybe Yugyeom had one too many drinks. And maybe he was dancing slightly inappropriately with a man named Jackson, but he was having fun. Though fun seemed to come in the form of stumbling over his own feet and clinging to the other male while laughing his ass off.

“Easy there, Princess.” The pet name had Yugyeom flushing, or maybe it was just all the alcohol in his system - he couldn’t be too sure. “I think it’s time for you to take a break.”

“No!” Yugyeom whined, drawing out the ‘o’ for as long as he could. “I don’t wanna!” He pouted, standing as straight as he possibly could and crossed his arms over his chest.

“Don’t be like that cutie.” Jackson chuckles, slipping his arm around Yugyeom’s waist, fingers gently stroking the bare skin that was exposed. With a gentle push, he guided the other towards the bar so they could sit, but before they even got halfway there, someone approached them and took Yugyeom’s hand, pulling him away from Jackson’s grasp.

“Come on! We have to go!” BamBam called as he dragged his stumbling friend away from the hunk he had been dancing with.

“Go where?!?” Yugyeom whined louder than last time.

“Home!”

Yugyeom frowned and huffed softly. He yanked his hand from BamBam, causing the other to stop. “Hang on. Gotta...” he trailed off bent over to take off his shoe. “Stupid cup.” He muttered to himself and kicked the shoe away before taking BamBam’s hand once more and following him outside.

“Hurry! We got get home before midnight! My mom will kill me if she knew I took her bike.” BamBam practically three Yugyeom onto the moped outside and climbed on after him. After a minute of fumbling to find his keys, he managed to start the bike and started off towards home.

———

Mornings were always horrible. Mornings when hungover were even worse and Yugyeom was absolutely regretting letting BamBam talk him into going to the club last night. Despite the fact that he had fun, the pain in his head was just a bit too much for him to even bare at the moment. His stomach did flips as he slowly pushed himself up in bed, eyes scanning his - thankfully - dark room and noted that he really needed to pick up his clothes and hide them before one of his parents came to wake him up. But the simple act of just breathing hurt and he wondered if maybe he could survive whatever tirade his parents would have if they saw women's clothing on his floor. Probably not but his body was refusing to do anything at the moment, so he flopped back down, curling up into a small ball as he turned to face his nightstand. Spotting his phone, he reached out and grabbed it, checking what notifications he had - which turned out to be a bad idea because the brightness was turned to 100%.

Groaning as the pain surged in his head, he quickly fumbled to turn the brightness down all the way so he could comfortably stare at his phone without feeling like his head was going to explode. He had several drunken texts from BamBam and three texts from an unknown number, which confused him. Had he given his number out to someone while at the club? That wasn't something he would usually do. He had an issue with giving his number out just to his friend so he highly doubted he would give his number to someone else. But that was Yugyeom when he was sober. There was no telling what drunk Yugyeom would do.

Unlocking his phone, he pulled up his messages, quickly opening the unknown number one and read it.

Hey, this is Jackson. We met last night at the club. I got your number from BamBam, who I got his number from my buddy Jaebeom. Hope that's okay. Anyway, you kinda left your shoe at the club last night, you were pretty drunk. I have it and I was hoping to return it to you.

Yugyeom read the texts three times, trying to make sense of the jumbled words - groaning loudly when thinking increased the pain in his head. Never again was he drinking! Rubbing his forehead for a moment, he let out a shaky breath and started typing back.

Thanks. Uh, we can meet somewhere in a few hours. Need to get over this hangover first.

The response was almost instant and Yugyeom wondered if the other had been sitting there waiting for him to reply.

Oof. I feel that, you were pretty drunk last night, princess.

Yugyeom could feel his cheeks heating up at the pet name and familiar happiness that he had felt last night came surging back into his gut.

I can tell and I regret it.

Don't regret it. You were so cute stumbling over you feet while trying to dance. Made me want to wrap you up tightly in a hug.

My hero! So, if I'm a princess, that means your my Prince Charming, right?

Well I did hear something about you needing to be home before midnight when you were running off with your friend. And I have your shoe. I think Cinderella is probably the better name for you.

Yugyeom blinked, head cocking to the side as he stared the phone. A soft chuckle left him as he did his best to think back on the night before. It was pretty funny considering that even BamBam had been treating him like a princess, calling his moped a chariot. He was a complete idiot and he had waved it off, but now that he was thinking about it, it was almost like he was in a weird version of the story of Cinderella. Maybe he could find his own happy ending.

I'd rather stick to Princess if you don't mind.

Princess it is then. Text me later when you're feeling better and we can meet up.

Yugyeom smiled softly, sending a quick text back at he would and laid his phone down on the nightstand once more. Sighing contently, he nuzzled his face into his pillows as his eyes fluttered closed. A little nap to help his hangover and then he would meet up with his Prince Charming. Maybe going to the club hadn't been a bad idea after all.

[jaelouvre-main]

I had a dream that I was with beommie on a motorcycle? I think and I was telling him he needs a long rest and he’s like no no it’s fine and I’m like >:( you need to rest, look I’m going home, I live on a farm, you can come rest here, we have a lot of land to walk on and two nice donkeys you can hug and then for some reason it skipped to him being a little man I called mr. chocolate and I forgot who he was originally 💀 I gave him a cheek kith for you tho princess

firstly, very rude of him to visit you in your dreams when i've been asking him to do that for months >:( secondly, that was a ride baby wth 😭 and thirdly thanks for kithing his cheek :-(

[artemisxlune]

Jen Jen Jen... I had a really cute dream last night tho. Okie so I was married to Mark and we were having a baby shower for our first baby. So we're sitting there surrounded by all the boys and guess what? I turn to you and Beommie ( who are happily married, by the way), asking you guys " so when are you gonna have some human babies to go with your cat babies?" He didn't even look at you before being all dead serious and going all like " soon, right babe? 😏" and You're all blushy. I died 😭😭

oh look.. 🤰🏻 AHHAHAHAHAAH

[beomiracles]

𝐂𝐑𝐈𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐀𝐋 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐒𝐂𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 TAPE 02

𝓓𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐌 𝓔𝐍𝐓𝐑𝐘 ⸝⸝ Moving rapidly through your career as one of the leading female investigators, you never once encountered a case you couldn't crack. Though you never expected for your past mistakes to come back and haunt you in the form of an ex lover, accused of murder. ⸝⸝

𝓹airings criminal!beomgyu x detective!reader 𝔀arnings drinking, kissing, red flag beomgyu but what's new, references to them hooking up, descriptions of blood/gore/murder, surprisingly little warnings for such a long tape, but it's just... vibes through and through I can't explain it okay?

📼 THE TAPE RECORDINGS

𝓣𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝓢𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐘 contains dark themes portraying unhealthy and toxic relationships and substance abuse. reader discretion is advised ! — this story is partly told in flashbacks, beware of timestamps as past/present are mixed throughout the story.

#serene adds ✎.. heh, this one's a mouthful, but that's only because it's the original 02 and 03 merged heh, plus my own fleshed out version of course. hmm, I really like this part though, a personal favourite :3 absolutely would cry if I got to hear ur thoughts on it !!

[ ▶︎ •၊၊||၊|။| TAPE 02 ] — Red Lipstick Stains recording length: 9.8k

📼 — PRESENT TIME ; February 19th 2024

“Is everything alright?” 

Kai’s light voice slices through the dark clouds looming over your head and your gaze snaps up to meet his. “You’ve barely touched your food”, he says as he motions toward your still full plate. You follow his line of sight, heaving a small sigh as you prop your head on one of your hands. 

“Not feeling particularly hungry today I suppose”, You mumble as you push said food around leisurely with your fork. It was kind of Kai to offer you lunch like this, your junior often did his best in trying to please his colleagues, sometimes you wondered if Kai ever gave himself credit for his hard work. 

Kai puts his own fork down as he swallows. His big brown eyes search yours, much to no avail as you keep them trained to your plate with a displeased frown. He clears his throat, “Does it have anything to do with your new case this morning?” He asks the question hesitantly, like he was afraid of stepping on a nerve he wasn’t supposed to. 

Finally, you lift your gaze to look at him. Pulling your bottom lip between your teeth, you ponder your next words carefully. It wasn’t like you didn’t trust Kai, but Yeonjun had made it clear that what you were doing was technically against policy. Besides, Kai had never been one to keep secrets, especially not when pressured into confessings, which he more than often was. 

“Partly..” You slowly admit, “But for the most part I’m just tired, it’s been a long week as is.” You give a weak shrug as you reach for your glass, sipping on your water unenthusiastically. Kai, on the other hand, doesn't seem convinced as he studies you with a small frown. Still, he seems to respect your boundaries and doesn’t try to pry further. 

You give him a faint smile, “Sorry, I’m not exactly good company right now.” But your junior quickly shakes his head, immediately objecting. — “You’re always great company, noona.” Both the compliment and the formality makes your smile widen, Kai really was adorable. 

“You’re great company too, Huening.” 

He blushes furiously at that as he quickly occupies himself with his own food. You liked spending time with Kai, he was easygoing, despite his somewhat awkward compliments. The atmosphere always felt light when he was around. The restaurant he’d taken you to was small and quaint, situated just across the park. And though the flowers had yet to bloom and the treetops remained naked, you found it a beautiful sight. 

Beomgyu had rarely taken you out to restaurants. In fact, he’d rarely taken you out at all, anywhere besides those clubs and dark hotel rooms at least. Back then you failed to see the issue with that, but then again, there were a lot of things you had disregarded in better judgement of Choi Beomgyu. 

⸝⸝ 

📼 — March 31st 2022 

Three days was actually an awfully long time when you waited for something. And it felt even longer when you didn’t know if what you waited for would ever come. In fact, these past three days had felt like three years. — 72 excruciatingly long hours without Beomgyu, and for every single one of those hours, you had not stopped thinking about him. 

On your way to class, in class, at work, at home, with Kayla. Oh. That’s right. You had yet to tell your friend about your quickie out in the alleway. It was better that way, or at least so you thought. She would only scold you for going against her words... But what if they had been said out of jealousy? You shouldn’t take them too seriously, right? 

Sex wouldn’t kill you. — But it would definitely get you addicted. 

This newfound abstinence somehow grew with each passing day. You thought you would’ve moved on by now, forgotten him, just like he’d forgotten you. It was obvious that what had transpired between the two of you three days ago had merely been an exchange of pleasure. Beomgyu hadn’t as much as looked back when you parted ways, neither had he given you his number, or taken yours. 

It was a one time thing, no strings attached, literally. Perhaps his nonchalance after sharing such an intimate moment should’ve been your first warning. 

Briefly you wondered if things would’ve turned out differently, had you taken a cab home that night and forgot about the alluring stranger. But there was no changing the past, and now you were to live with this decision, for as long as you could remember.

It was late, well past midnight on a Tuesday night when your otherwise dry phone chimed with a notification. The bright screen illuminates your dark bedroom, and your attention diverts from the coursebook in your lap and over to the small device. With a perplexed frown, you reach for it. As you squint against the near blinding brightness, you find an unfamiliar number on screen.

The sender had left one message. An address and a time. 

2am.. And in an area you did not recognize. A small and uneasy feeling settling within the pits of your stomach as you re-read the text over and over. Despite every reasonable sense in your body practically screaming for you to block whoever this was and forget about it, you can’t seem to find it in you. 

Instead your shaky fingers begin to type out a reply. 

“Who is this?”

Message not delivered. Huh? Why wouldn’t it let you… Something was wrong, very wrong. But despite your inner turmoil, the winning side ends up being the one that forces you out of bed as you stumble toward your dresser. — The sender had left no signature, yet you were almost certain of its source. A small sense of hope surges through you, and it is what compels you to go through with this utterly idiotic decision. 

Your arms wrap around your skimpily dressed body. Spring has yet to take hold on the biting frost that still lingered. With urgent steps, you scurry through the narrow alleyway. The light of your phone screen illuminated your way amongst the unfamiliar buildings and the further you got from the main street, the heavier your heart grew. Had this been a mistake? What if someone was luring you out here to kill you? 

Finally, there’s light. But it is not the warm and comforting glow of the usual streetlights. No, this is a purple, almost pinkish hue. It paints the brick walls around in a soft sheen. Your pulse quickens as you near the entrance of what you assumed to be another nightclub. It was strange.. You hadn’t heard of this one, nor was it anywhere to be found online. 

There’s a man by the doorway. You find your gaze lingering by his broad shoulders, his thick arms looking ready to rip through the tight shirt he wore. Your breath hitches in your throat when you catch a glimpse of the multiple tattoos of different symbolism covering his veiny forearms. Did he not get cold? 

The bouncer looks down at you, for he was tall as a skyscraper, and raises a brow. “You lost?” He asks, his voice is gruff, carrying a mocking tone as he watches you expectantly. — Nervously you shift on the spot, your mouth opening and closing repeatedly as you fumble for words. “I uh…” 

He chuckles, the sound echoing through the alleyway as he throws his head back. “It’s alright - What you’re looking for is probably down the street and to your right.” He nods in said direction, a smug grin stretching across his lip when his gaze falls on you once more. — “It’s more, your style”, he slowly adds. 

You can’t help the offended frown that flashed across your face. Your style? Sure you wouldn’t argue over the fact that this was unlike anything you’d usually do. But this was just insulting. How dare he speak to you like that, how dare he… — Oh but who were you kidding? You looked nothing like those who would spend half their awake time here. 

What were you even thinking, coming here, all alone no less? There was no way you would be let inside. — Such a waste of time. 

With a heavy sigh, you readjust your grip on the small handbag you’d brought, turning on your heel as you prepare to leave, when suddenly, a voice calls for you. It’s familiar, much so that it makes your stomach flip as you freeze up. Beomgyu. — Slowly glancing over your shoulder, your eyes lock with his dark ones. 

Beomgyu pushes past the bouncer who immediately gives a quick bow and steps aside. “Dollface”, he exhales, the nickname still sticking as he wraps an arm around your waist, making the hairs on the back of your neck stand. “You made it.” 

You can barely protest as he pulls you to his side, your bodies clashing against one another as he heads for the entrance he’d just emerged from. Upon passing the bouncer you think you might hear him whisper something to the man under his breath, though you remain unsure of what exactly transpired between the two. 

Given your not-so-broad expertise of clubs, you would say that at first glance, this place was no different. But as Beomgyu leads you through the crowded dance floor you slowly begin to realize that this was something entirely new. — This whole place felt almost exquisite, and the people here seemed aware of it. 

There was no bar, instead drinks were being served by the many waiters pacing the outlines of the main floor, all of them wearing the same black uniform. Large, velvet clad booths line the walls, and you expect Beomgyu to take you to one of them. — His gaze, however, seems fixed on the large staircase on the other side of the room. 

Quickly you notice the lingering glances you receive. Well, the lingering glances he receives. All eyes seemed to be on him as Beomgyu swerves his way through the crowd. Did he know these people? Did they know him? They have to, given the way they all stepped aside when he passed. 

You, on the other hand, were barely spared as much as a quick look, apart from a nasty scowl delivered by one of the many hooker-looking women. — What made Beomgyu so special here? 

Suddenly, his hand on your lower back feels heavy, like his fingers were going to sink into your skin and leave a permanent indent. If Beomgyu felt their stares, it didn’t seem to affect him in the slightest. Biting down a shudder, you keep your gaze trained ahead as you follow along, reaching the grand staircase with a sigh of relief. 

When you make it to the top, a pair of double doors are immediately swung open and you step inside. Your eyes scan the more desolate area, drinking in the expensive looking furniture, the extravagant booths and the quiet murmur of those chatting with one another. Suddenly you understood… “Isn’t this the VIP section?” 

Beomgyu huffs at your question, his lips pulling into a small smirk as he nods. “Clever girl.” 

As he steers you toward one of the larger booths, you realize that you wouldn’t be all alone. A man who looked to be in his late twenties sits by the round table, his leg propped on one knee as he swishes a drink in his hand. You did not recognize him, but had you seen him out on the streets one lonesome night, your first instinct would have been to run. 

“Duri!” Beomgyu’s exclamation carries out into the otherwise quiet but hot air and the man lifts his head as he peers in your direction. He sets his drink down, shifting in his seat when the two of you approach. — ��And here I was beginning to think you had stood me up”, Duri says, a wide grin on his face. His gaze drifts to Beomgyu’s hand, still secure on your lower back. 

“Ah”, he exhales, “Now I see what kept you from me.” He sends you a not-so-subtle wink, but it didn’t feel the same way it had when Beomgyu did it. 

You clear your throat, it would be rude not to introduce yourself, right? — “Hi, uh…I..” Upon giving him a small, rather awkward wave, Duri suddenly bursts into laughter. He continues for a good thirty seconds, despite neither you or Beomgyu joining in, the latter seemingly unamused. 

“Pretty little thing you’ve got there”, Duri comments as he brings his glass to his lips, “What’s your name, love?” 

“Oh! It’s-” 

Beomgyu’s hand slithers around your waist, giving your hip a firm squeeze. “Dollface. This is my old friend, Duri.” He gestures to the man in front of you, giving him an unenthusiastic look that contradicted his previous excitement. “Duri, this is dollface.” Beomgyu doesn’t give you an opportunity to protest, his demanding grip steering you toward the booth, sliding in next to Duri as he pulls you along. 

He doesn’t seem to notice the frown on your face upon settling against the cushion. “Nice to meet you”, Duri says, eyeing you carefully over the rim of his glass. — “Uh, you too..” You shyly mumble, squeaking when Beomgyu’s hand finds place on your thigh, his cold rings stinging your bare skin. 

His free hand quickly calls a waiter over who seems to be stumbling on his feet to get to your booth faster. Beomgyu’s eyes are suddenly on you, “What d’you want, dollface?” — Taken aback, you glance between him and the waiter, biting the inside of your cheek. “I’ll have whatever you’re having.” 

Beomgyu nods, turning back to the waiter with an indifferent expression. “My usual, make it two.” — As the man scurries off, you force yourself to relax as Beomgyu and Duri indulge in a conversation regarding topics you had little knowledge of. They used words and slang you couldn’t recognize, speaking in hushed voices, as if being eavesdropped on. 

Left with your own thoughts, your mind wanders back to just a few moments prior. Why hadn’t he introduced you? Was he ashamed, but why bring you along in the first place then. Your eyes drift to Beomgyu’s hand on your thigh, his fingers moving absentmindedly over your naked skin, making light tapping motions. 

Why had he invited you here tonight? You thought it had been for easy sex, but as you sit here, your back pressed against the expensive velvet, everything felt a little too formal. Did he have an ulterior motive for bringing you out here, and if so, what? 

You could feel the heavy stares sent your way, people were always looking, as if Beomgyu was some sort of artifact. They were never really looking at you, but you somehow felt as if placed under a microscope. — It was almost thrilling in a way, sitting so close to the thing everyone in the room silently seemed to desire, for reasons you couldn’t quite understand. 

“Open up.” 

Beomgyu’s thick voice pulls you from your trail of thoughts. Startled, you blink as the cool surface of glass presses against your lips. Obliging, you let him pour the liquor into your waiting mouth. It burns your throat, yet leaves an almost sweet aftertaste. “This is good..” You murmur, taking the glass from his hand. 

The smirk on his lips only grows, “Knew you’d like it, dollface.” 

His statement makes your chest flutter and you feel your own lips pull into a small grin. “Why, you seem to know everything about me.” It was supposed to come across as a joke, friendly banter if you will. But Beomgyu’s eyes twinkle with something beyond mischief, something slightly darker, something dangerously close to lust. 

“You’d be surprised”, is all he says, leaning back against the velvet cushion as he sips on his own drink. What was that supposed to mean? 

You had almost forgotten Duri, and you jumped in your seat when he suddenly clears his throat. “Well, it seems my date for tonight has arrived.” He rises to his feet, chugging the last of his drink before setting his glass down. “Pleasure meeting you ‘dollface’..” He gives you one final glance, scoffing before walking off to join one of the girls a few booths away. 

Beomgyu doesn’t pay him any further attention, his gaze fixed on something far ahead as he mindlessly drinks. — “Who was he?” You can’t help but ask, feeling your curiosity gnawing away at you. 

“An old friend”, he simply shrugs, clearly ready to discard the matter. But you were far from satisfied with his nonchalant response. — “Then why didn’t you introduce me, if he’s an old friend I mean?” 

The small frown creasing his forehead was the first of actual expressions you’d seen on him. “I did.” He replies shortly, setting his glass down on the small table in front of you. Shaking your head, you twist in your seat to look at him fully. “Why not my name?” 

You knew your persistence was getting to him when he sighed. “What’s it to him?” He was sounding almost defensive now, his agitated response only riling you up further as you sought answers. “So? He’s your friend.” 

“Perhaps…” Beomgyu exhales, his attention now turned to Duri who was feeling up the girl he’d joined not even three minutes ago. “But not one you should be acquainted with.” — “Why?” 

Beomgyu groans, running a hand across his face tiredly. “You’re being really difficult here, sweetheart..” — “Did he do something bad?” This time you couldn’t refrain from asking, from crossing a line you knew you couldn’t return from. 

“Haven’t we all?” He counters upon emptying the last of his drink and his words sound almost solemn. You frown, “Yes but-” 

“Drop it dollface.” His voice is cold, causing a shiver to run down your spine, leaving no room for arguments as he slams his glass down on the table. You gulp as your gaze drops to the drink in your hand, its once sweet taste now sour on your tongue. Was he angry with you? You couldn’t tell, for Beomgyu’s expression remained stoic as his hand returned to your thigh. 

His answer made you certain of one thing though. Duri was someone who did things he shouldn’t. You recall Kayla’s last words about Shay, about the substance abuse, about Beomgyu. Would that mean that he also… No. Maybe he just bought from him every now and then? A small amount couldn’t be that bad right? As long as he had it under control. 

Back then you didn’t know it. But Beomgyu loved his control, more than a lot of things, more than a lot of people. — You glance up at him once more, a thousand questions prodding at your lips, you choose one. 

“How did you get my number?” 

Beomgyu groans, “Fuck dollface, you ask a lot of questions.” His free hand slides up your arm, moving to the nape of your neck as he brings your lips to his in a hot kiss. Beomgyu was good at avoiding questions, perhaps a little too good. 

That should’ve been your second warning. 

⸝⸝

📼 — PRESENT TIME ; February 19th 2024

Beomgyu had barely changed during the ten months you’d gone without seeing him. His hair was still the same pitch black, though a bit more unkempt and thinner by the ends. He had acquired dark circles under his eyes, they made his face appear more hollow. It was almost like life itself had been drained out of him. — Yet his charisma persisted, and Beomgyu took every opportunity he could grasp in order to push and prod at your buttons. 

You rarely found yourself in doubt of your own abilities. In fact, you had been outstanding amongst your peers during your months in training. And to interrogate, to break even the most coldhearted criminal with your mere words, there was an undeniable satisfaction in that. But as soon as you had stepped foot inside the room you had been trained in for so long, all confidence was lost on you. 

How could you ever see through him, through Beomgyu. For over a year you had been trying to read him. To crack him open and peer into his mind. Sure, you had been taught different techniques and methods now, you’d practiced and then practiced again. This wasn’t the same, far from it. For Beomgyu was nothing like anyone you’d ever met before. 

Just looking at him right now made your head spin. 

“What’s your relationship to the victim?” You school your voice into professionalism, into a cool and detached one. No matter how hard of a front you put up, it felt as if he could see right through it. — Beomgyu doesn’t meet your gaze, making it impossible for you to look for clues within his eyes. He twists the rings on his fingers, one by one, almost methodically. 

A smirk you knew all too well tugs across his lips. “What’s your relationship to that man?” 

Your mind goes blank, your brows raising on your forehead as you glance around. The room was empty, just like it had been for the past thirty minutes. — “Please don’t divert from the subject when we’re-” 

“The one in the doorway earlier.” He’s not giving up, and you push back a shudder when his dark eyes flicker up to yours. It was clear that he was looking for an easy entry into your head. He was searching for any kind of insecurity you might hold, he would puncture it and slither inside, just like he always did. 

You recall the afternoon’s events, thinking back to your lunch with Kai. Carelessly you had let him drop you off by the interrogation rooms. Had Beomgyu seen him? That would be your only explanation. “That was my colleague”, you say, keeping your expression stoic, even when Beomgyu’s smirk widens. 

“Really?” He drawls, and whether he kept going because the matter intrigued him, or if it was to waste time on irrelevant topics, you didn’t know. His dark eyes flicker between yours and the door which you had emerged from half an hour ago. “Didn’t look like it to me.” 

There he goes again, spewing his nonsense as he waits for you to eat from his palm. Just like you used to. He didn’t have that power over you anymore, you told yourself that. — “What you think does not matter.” Your hands reach for files in front of you as you readjust them, buying yourself some much needed time as your attention diverts to the pictures attached. 

“What? He your boyfriend or something?” 

His question comes out half a statement, half a huff. A short breath of disbelief, an almost menacing look on his face. But you’re not stupid enough not to catch the subtle tick of his jaw, the way his dark eyes narrowed, if just a little. He rocks his chair back on its hind legs, patiently waiting for your response as he tries to gauge your reaction. After everything, he still thought he had a say in anything regarding your life, regarding you. 

“He might be”, you shrug, already flipping through the files in order to avoid confronting the topic head on. It was a lie of course. He didn’t have to know that. Beomgyu had lied to you too, at one point, it had gotten hard to differentiate any of the reality that had been vowed between his lies. 

“Bullshit.” 

The sound of his cuffed hands slamming against the old metal table is deafening, the front legs of his chair hit the ground once more with an equally empowering thud. He leans forward now, even more than what was both professionally and emotionally appropriate for either of you. — Briefly you thought that Yeonjun might interrupt, and you listen for the door. But he never comes. 

You don’t flinch, not even when his hot breath tickles your face. His brows furrow, the corner of his lips twitching. “He’s not your type”, Beomgyu plainly states, the words falling from his lips are so close that you could practically taste them on your own. — “Who says?” You quickly retort, immediately scolding yourself for letting your professionalism falter. 

Your small slip up doesn’t pass him unnoticed and Beomgyu smirks. “C’mon dollface, you forget I know everything about you.” — “Knew.” You’re quick to interrupt him, your voice sharp and almost snappy. “You knew everything about me.” 

“People change Beomgyu, I changed.” Your professionalism was slipping at a dangerous rate. You didn’t care. The satisfaction of hearing those very words leave your own two lips was far more enticing than the policy you had to follow. 

Beomgyu’s expression remains unfazed, his brows slightly raised on his forehead as he watches you with calculating eyes. His tongue swipes across his bottom lip mindlessly. Ring clad fingers tapping against the metal table rhythmically, mimicking the tick of a clock, the sound ringing in your ears. You swallow, forcing your breathing to remain regulated as you place your files down. “Let’s hold here for today.” 

The screech of your chair against the stone floor pierces the air as you stand up. Dusting off your pants, you intend to not spare him as much as a second glance when you head for the door. The cool handle sends a small spark of electricity through your palm as you grip it tight. But before you get the chance to turn it and step outside, Beomgyu speaks; 

“Is red his favorite color too?” 

Your body feels ice cold, your heart catching in your throat and your eyes widening as you gaze ahead. “What?” You echo as you slowly turn to face him. He chuckles, but the laugh holds no warmth. Not until his dark eyes fall on your lips do you realize what he’s talking about. Without being able to stop yourself, your fingers reach up to touch the fresh coat of paint you’d applied after lunch. 

The red lipstick that you had accidentally brought along this morning, the one you were supposed to get rid of. It had been but a mere coincidence right… The way it had presented itself so nicely on your dresser earlier that day. 

Beomgyu smirks, his fingers coming to a halt on the metal of the table in front of him. “You still look fucking irresistible in it”, he says, pulling his bottom lip between his teeth. 

You look away, not wanting to face him a second longer. It was torturous, everything about him was. It instantly reminded you of why you had walked away all those months ago, of why you had tried so hard to forget him, to bury him within the depths of your mind, somewhere unattainable. 

“My boyfriend thinks so too.” It’s all you say before quickly turning on your heel and swinging the door open. Your heart pounds in your chest as you step outside. Slamming the door shut behind you with a loud thud, you lean against it as you try to compose yourself. 

Fuck, he still made you dizzy. 

That night turned into a sleepless one. Spent going through the remnants of Beomgyu, the pieces of him you still carried. Many times you’d been at war with yourself. One side argued that you should rid yourself of him completely, start anew, in a reality without him. The other side, the one that felt more than it thought, desperately clung onto him, in every way it could. That side made you replay every single memory shared with him, the good and the bad ones, it made you cry deep into the night and it made you scream in frustration and anger. Yet it always seemed to win. 

You turn the lipstick in your hands, fingers gliding against the smooth tube. It had come in a small box, wrapped in gold and tied with a red bow. Your hands had trembled as you undid the ribbon, and Beomgyu had been watching you intently. — You could still feel the weight of his hand on your lower back, the other one caressing your thighs swung over his lap. 

When you had plucked the lid, revealing the shiny artifact, your eyes had widened. Your lips parted delicately as you glanced between the lipstick and him. “I… Beomgyu this is…” You had barely been able to finish your sentence, too astonished by the gift before you. 

“Try it.” He exhales, his breath warm against the side of your face. With a small nod of your head you screwed the bottom of the tube, revealing the deep red lipstick. The cosmetic melted across your lips like butter, and you carefully spread an even layer, painfully aware of his eyes on you. 

Gently smacking your lips once, you turn to Beomgyu, shy gaze meeting his hungry one. His thumb brushed along your chin, swiping away any excess product. “Now you look like a real doll”, he’d murmured, knuckles caressing your heated cheeks. 

“I’ll wear it”, you had whispered as you leaned into his touch. And Beomgyu had hummed, a soft sound of approval as he’d pressed his lips against your freshly painted ones. 

“Good, red is my favorite color.” 

⸝⸝

📼 — April 10th 2022 

Beomgyu was difficult. Not in the sense where he was vague. Because whenever the two of you saw one another it would always lead to sex, he would make sure of that. Naturally you thought it was a mutual benefit situation going on. It wasn’t something you were opposed to, even if the idea hadn’t enticed you before. He was just… different. 

It would always go the same way. He sent you an address and a time, you showed up. It was a simple deal, one that had occurred without either of you confirming it out loud. For each instance he would use a different number, an untraceable one. At first you’d tried to show disinterest in the matter, to act like it didn’t bother you. But the truth was it did, a lot. 

Usually it’d be a club, never the same as the last, and he would make sure to get you alone as quickly as he could. Tonight was different, tonight he’d booked a hotel room, just for the two of you. And in the darkness, where only the sounds of your panting breaths lingered once he’d pulled out, you suddenly found your thoughts wandering. 

Usually you’d pass out quickly, feeling oddly comforted in his warm embrace. But tonight you’re wide awake. He is too, for his fingers draw lazy patterns on your naked hip. You swallow, blinking twice as you try to push the images from your head, biting back the questions waiting on your tongue. You didn’t want to ruin this moment, it felt fragile, like one misstep could shatter the entire thing. 

Yet the aftermath of your orgasm still surged within the depths of your stomach. It gave you confidence you usually lacked. Craning your neck, you turn your face to peer up at him. Still unable to make out his expression in the dark, you hesitate, if only for a second before asking the one question that had been on your mind for nearly two weeks. 

“Why won’t you give me your number?” 

Your words felt deafening, like church bells ringing through the air a quiet Sunday morning. Beomgyu doesn't answer, his chest rising and falling under your cheek as his fingers stop on your hip. Had you overstepped? No, this was a perfectly reasonable question. So what was the problem? 

Beomgyu heaves a sigh, the huff of air blowing over the top of your head. “Don’t got one”, he replies, his voice echoing through the hotel room. 

Confused, you lift your head as you squint toward him. “What’s that supposed to mean?” 

He shrugs, “Means I don’t got one.” 

You bite the inside of your cheek, hesitating. “Then how am I supposed to contact you?” Once the questions started spilling from your lips it seemed impossible to stop. You could tell he was getting annoyed by the second. — “You’re not”, he firmly states. His words manage to kill any lingering lust and warmth, the room suddenly felt cold. 

It was then, in that moment, that you realized that your relationship with Beomgyu was nothing more than a casual and mutual exchange of pleasure. You should’ve known that, suppose part of you always had, but his statement made it all the more clear. With a solemn expression you stare up at the ceiling, quietly mulling over his words. 

Sometimes it felt as if Beomgyu was made of ice. It was nearly impossible to get close, and even when you did, there was a thick layer concealing him. Nothing you said seemed to get him to melt, and anything regarding his personal life was kept stored deep within the cold. 

Beneath you Beomgyu shifts and you soon feel the warmth of his body disappear as he climbs out of bed. He doesn’t bother turning on the light but you can hear him pulling his clothes back on as he prepares to leave. — With a quiet kiss to your forehead he says, “I’ll text you.” And with that he was gone. 

It was the first time he’d left before you fell asleep. 

⸝⸝

📼 — April 17th 2022 

Days went by after that, and you didn’t hear from Beomgyu once. And when a whole week had passed since your night at the hotel, you were beginning to think that perhaps you never would. But if it was one thing you would come to learn about him, it was that you never had him where you thought you did. 

You were halfway through your morning lecture when you got his notification. A new number, a new address, just like usual. The relief and excitement that immediately flooded your senses should have been concerning. Did you long for him much so that even a simple text could get you worked up? It was almost as if you had become addicted. Everytime the unknown number flashed across your screen you knew that you would be getting your next fix. 

Anticipation flowed through your veins and you hurriedly stashed your books in your bag as soon as your professor finished talking. There was little time to waste. You walk with quick and fast paced strides, ignoring any of your classmates that tried to approach, all with friendly smiles on their faces. Any other day but today, you thought. Because today was about him. 

You reach the parking lot, all the way to your car and with your hand on the handle, a small tap to your shoulder makes you freeze. Twisting around on the spot, your eyes widen as they land on your slightly panting classmate.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry Taehyun, I didn’t realize you were..” 

Your classmate waves a dismissing hand, shaking his head as he catches his breath. “It’s alright”, Taehyun clears his throat, a small grin spreading across his face. Taehyun was perhaps the only friend you had made during your time spent studying criminal justice. He was easy to talk to, and made your courses somewhat easier. You would often partner up for group projects, and this time around was no different. 

“I was wondering if you’re free tonight, for our project y’know..” He mumbles as he scratches the back of his neck sheepishly. Biting the inside of your cheek, you glance between your waiting classmate and the phone still gripped tightly in your hand. — You were supposed to meet Beomgyu tonight. 

Then again, was it really such a good idea to put your own personal needs and pleasure above your important studies, not to mention Taehyun’s as well? Beomgyu had seemingly little care for your own schedule, yet you were breaking your back trying to be there at his every beck and call. — Your eyes meet Taehyun’s hopeful ones, and in that moment you can’t bring yourself to tell him no. Fact is he had actually asked you like a decent human being, rather than sending a simple text from what could only be a burner phone. 

“If you’re not free we can totally reschedule..” — “Does 6:30 work for you?” 

Taehyun blinks, seemingly taken aback before quickly nodding, “Sure!” 

Perhaps this was just what you needed, a little distraction. Part of you wondered what would happen when you didn’t show up tonight, another part didn’t want to find out. 

⸝⸝

Your afternoon was spent like most, cleaning tables at the restaurant in which you worked part time. The hours didn’t pay a lot, but it was enough to get you through the month as you balance your studies. Having hit off with both the owners and their son, you often found yourself staying for dinner or even getting sent home leftovers from the day. Their kindness was remarkable and you made sure to work hard in order to repay them. 

It was nearing the end of your shift, the restaurant was fairly vacant and you had all but much to do. Upon clearing the last table, the doorbell suddenly chimed, announcing the arrival of new customers. Instinctively you turn to greet them — only to freeze in your tracks as your eyes fall on the small party of men. They were all dressed head to toe in black, some even wearing sunglasses despite the early spring season. 

The man by the very front caught your eye and your heart leapt out of your chest when you connected his face with a name. 

“You got any tables for five?” Duri’s booming voice sounds through the painstakingly empty room. He sounded nothing like the playful and almost flirtatious Duri you had met a couple of weeks ago. You nod, “This way”, you say, trying your best to swallow down the lump in your throat as you lead them toward a secluded table by the corner. 

Upon handing them the menu, your gaze keeps flickering back to Duri. He had yet to show any signs of recognition and you were starting to think that perhaps he hadn’t recognized you at all. A temporary sense of relief washes over you, one that would quickly be disrupted as you begin taking orders. You save him for last, turning to him with the most friendly smile you could muster. 

Duri remains quiet, a sly smirk tugging at the corner of his lips. It didn't remind you of Beomgyu in the slightest, this man felt almost disgusting in a way. “Surprise me”, he then says before slamming the menu book shut. 

It isn’t until the kitchen doors fall shut behind you that you breathe out the tension you had allowed to build up during the past five minutes. What were the odds? Of all the restaurants why did he… You shake your head, dragging a tired hand down your face as you stifle a groan. — If he had recognized you, why didn’t he say something? 

You glance down to the notepad in your hand, their orders scribbled down hastily as you hurried to get away from them. The word “surprise” seems taunting as your eyes linger on the messy ink. A small frown tugs on your brows and you quietly tap the paper as an idea enters your mind. 

When bringing their food back out, you make sure to place Duri’s plate last, a rather strategic mood on your part. Your hands have an undeniable tremble to them as you tuck the folded note under the porcelain, making sure it peeks out just enough for him to see, and him only. Everyone else seems oblivious as they indulge in their meals, not paying you any mind even when you linger by their table for longer than needed. 

Duri on the other hand has noticed the piece of paper. He pulls it out between his middle and index finger, shooting you a questioning glance to which you subtly shake your head. Then he chuckles, the sound building deep within his chest as he shoves the note in his pocket. — You breathe out a heavy sigh of relief. 

With a quick bow you murmur a quiet, “Enjoy”, before turning on your heel and darting back to the kitchen. But before you make it to the large doors does his booming voice make you falter. “Thanks for the food, dollface.” 

⸝⸝

Takeout boxes and empty bottles of soju crowd the small coffee table in Taehyun’s living room. Perched on his old sofa, you and your classmate find yourselves engrossed in schoolwork, just like you had been for the past four hours. Time seemed to have little concept when spent in the presence of Taehyun and you found yourself having a lot more fun than you’d originally intended. 

Together you had been assigned to try and solve one of the many cold cases piling up at the office. It was a thrilling concept, it was something real and not fabricated by your professor for once. Using the little evidence there was, you and Taehyun play through the tape recordings of the few suspects interrogated. 

“Wait, play this part back.” Taehyun mumbles as he reaches for the record player. “Doesn't the ex-boyfriend sound suspicious here? You can clearly hear it in the way his voice breaks.” With his finger on the device, he increases the volume as he plays the tape back. You lean forward, your hands on your knees as you listen to the piece of audio. 

“I dunno..” You shrug, giving him a playful smile, “He sounds just like you.” Taehyun snorts, “As if.” Though he’s unable to refrain from grinning when he catches your giggle. 

“We haven’t played that one yet”, you point toward another cassette and your partner nods in agreement as he reaches for it. “Promise you won’t get scared?” He teases, to which you give his shoulder a push. 

Spending time with Taehyun was freeing, it was easy. But despite that, your subconscious kept wandering back to Beomgyu. A nervous feeling bubbled within your stomach, making your heart beat just a little faster at the thought of him. He’d occupied your mind for weeks now, holding your thoughts hostage and keeping you from focusing on what actually mattered. It was unfair, did he think about you like you thought about him? Hardly. 

And after slipping Duri that note, you could only hope he would receive the news of your changed plans. Would he be angry with you, or would he just not continue to see you at all. Not being able to directly contact him gnawed at you — for you wanted nothing more than to dial a quicker number and hear his voice on the other line, as pathetic as it might sound. 

Suppose it was a good thing after all. Had you had his number you probably wouldn’t be able to refrain from texting him. Yet you felt completely powerless like this, as if he was holding the strings and you were simply dancing along, just like he wanted you to. 

A small, shameful part of you felt jealous. What if he’d called someone else. Surely you weren’t the only woman he saw. But you were still special. He never saw those girls again, they were temporary, so you told yourself. Not you though, you weren’t temporary. You were someone he would call for, over and over again, you were special. 

“What do you think it’s going to be like?” Taehyun’s voice suddenly interrupts and you blink as you glance toward him. “Sorry what?” You dumbfoundedly ask, embarrassed over having spaced out like that. But your classmate only smiles, that stupidly warm and comforting smile of his. — “What do you think it’s going to be like? Out there I mean, when we finally make it.” 

You purse your lips, you had never really thought about it like that. Sure, you had known for a long time that you wanted to be someone who did good, someone who served justice and spoke for those who couldn’t. But you had never actually stopped to think of what it would be like when you were actually out there. 

You send Taehyun a lopsided grin, “I think it’s going to be awesome.” 

⸝⸝

📼 — PRESENT TIME ; February 20th 2024

The sound of car doors slamming shut echo throughout the narrow alleyway. Upon stepping out the distinctive smell of sewage water invades your senses. Yeonjun, too, makes a face of disgust as he steps out beside you. “Fucking hell”, he mutters as he pinches the bridge of his nose, pushing his glasses further up in the process.

The area was run down, yet nothing out of the ordinary. A small apartment complex loomed before you. The building was covered in graffiti and a multitude of its windows had been broken, making you assume that rent stayed on the cheaper end. — You didn’t have to stop and ask what kind of people lived here, you were far too familiar with the setting. Perhaps that was why you felt comfortable with taking the lead as you approached the small stone-staircase leading to the front door. 

Bright yellow tape highlights the door concealing the crime scene, reading out the words ‘DO NOT CROSS’ in bold text. Pushing said tape aside, you rummage your pockets for the set of keys you’d been provided. The old wooden door makes a squeaking side upon being opened as it slowly reveals the tiny flat. 

The sewage smell outside had been a mere foretaste of what was to come, and as the stench of dried blood hit you had to refrain from gagging. Behind you, Yeonjun remains silent as he lets you venture inside first, obviously interested in seeing your take on the scene. And while such a thing would’ve usually honored you, it somehow felt more like a curse today. 

It’s dark inside the apartment. The windows were boarded up in order to divert any unwanted attention and the air had become humid due to the confined space, in turn only increasing the sickly sweet and rotten smell of human blood. 

You mimic your senior’s actions of bringing out a flashlight, flicking it on before pointing it out before you. The frontdoor had led into an all but spacious hallway, following it took you to a tiny living room. — Something about crime scenes always makes you feel a melancholic sense of nostalgia. Whatever scene you were currently witnessing had been the last thing someone else ever had. It was a place where they had taken their very last breath, a time capsule, forever frozen in time. 

Chaos has spread through the open area, and instead of stumbling across a huge pool of blood, you find that it’s everywhere. It covers the coffee table, some having dripped down onto the fluffy carpet beneath. The couch is stained, as are the walls leading out into the bedroom. 

“They fought”, Yeonjun suddenly comments as he squats down by the sofa. He points his flashlight in the direction of the torn pillows, the indent of what had undoubtedly been a knife remaining. “He seems to have put up a hell of a fight”, you murmur as you gaze along the bloody handprints across the lower regions of the walls. 

Your senior hums, “They started in the kitchen”, he gets up and turns toward the archway. You follow him inside the small room, your curiosity at its peak. “How do you know?” You wonder to which Yeonjun pulls out a plastic bag from the large backpack he carried. Your brows rise on your forehead as you survey the bloody knife concealed inside. 

“This”, he says before motioning toward the sets of knives on the countertop and your gaze falls on the empty spot. — “Whoever killed Park Baekhyun attempted it with this knife, which they got from here.” 

Yeonjun gestures toward the entirety of the space as he continues, “Besides, this room is far less blood stained than the living room, meaning the fight most likely erupted here and then progressed outside as the victim tried to flee.” — As you take in the state of the kitchen you realize that he’s right. While the room was certainly messy, with piles of unwashed dishes in the sink as well as old takeout boxes, it never appeared to hold any signs of direct trauma. 

You follow him back into the living room as Yeonjun continues to piece together the events of that night. “The victim used pillows to defend himself”, he pointed toward the torn cushions whose feathers lay scattered across the couch. Then he frowns, “He got hit, and badly.” — Your gaze follows the heavy trail of blood leading toward the bedroom. 

“It’s strange”, Yeonjun mutters under his breath. You can’t help but ask, “What is?” 

Your senior motions toward the handprints covering the lower walls, “He couldn’t walk.” 

Admittedly you didn’t quite understand what that had to do with the matter. So what if he couldn’t walk, his fate was sealed either way, no? But Yeonjun obviously saw something you didn’t. His abilities to tell as much from the situation intrigued you greatly, and you were eager to learn his ways. 

As you approach the doorway leading to the bedroom he says, “The autopsy showed a wound on his right leg. Now, presuming that to be the reason he couldn’t walk he would have to have been crawling, using the walls to push himself forward, that would explain the handprints.” Yeonjun points to the dried blood on the cream white walls and you follow his line of sight. “This would have given the offender a great view of his throat, yet he didn’t kill him here.” 

You frown, why not kill him if he had the opportunity? Why waste time like that unless… “He enjoyed the hunt.” Yeonjun firmly states as he stops on the threshold leading into the bedroom. With a quick glance down the hallway, his eyes linger on the front door. “But why aim for the bedroom and not the way out?” 

“Could there be something important here?” You chime in, rocking back and forth on your heels as you eagerly peek over your seniors shoulder and into the bedroom. Yeonjun nods, “Perhaps.” 

The room itself remains untouched, almost neat if not for the unmade bed and dirty laundry scattered around. Though the struggle of Park Baekhyun remains evident on the floor, a thick and heavy trail of blood dragging past the foot of the bed and into the joint bathroom. 

A queasy feeling settles within your stomach as you approach. Out of all the rooms in the apartment, this somehow felt darker. The air was thicker, the scent of blood stronger and the lingering feeling of death almost crushing. — Once a pearly white, now covered in red was the bathroom. And as soon as you stepped inside, you knew that this was where the victim had taken his last dying breath. 

The mirror, broken into a million tiny pieces, lay scattered across the floor like pieces of an unsolved puzzle. The sink had several large cracks in it, you guessed from banging something or someone against it. 

Worst was the bathtub. Filled to the brim with murky red water, the shower curtains ripped off their hangers, likely a panicked response or one out of pure rage. Bloody hand and finger prints adorn the edge of the tub. — Yeonjun sighs next to you, “Victim’s cause of death was asphyxiation”, he points toward the water, “He drowned.” 

It was then your heart sank as reality finally settled in. This could all be Beomgyu’s doing. At first it had felt surreal, seeing him after so many months. Finding out that he was the prime suspect of this case. You had managed to downplay the whole thing, you had denied, no refused to believe that the man you thought to have loved could have done something like this. It was a reality you had been dying for longer than you wanted to admit. 

But as you see the blood, the way the victim had clung to life until the very end. And Beomgyu had taken that from him. He had taken it without any remorse. And you’d watched the grin playing on his lips when you read the case files, you’d heard the smugness in his voice. He was proud of himself, of what he had done. 

You felt sick to your stomach. A hand clasped over your mouth, you shake your head. The room suddenly felt small, its walls closing in on you, shoving the cold hard truth in your face. 

Beomgyu had killed someone. 

⸝⸝

📼 — April 18th 2022 

You ended up staying over at Taehyun’s place that night, and the next morning you carpooled to school. It was easy to forget when you were with him, and class proved to be just as good of a distraction. Before you knew it 9am had turned into 12pm and you soon found yourself walking out of the lecture hall. 

Kayla was supposed to pick you up as your own car had been left at home. Your eyes scan the parking lot for her familiar little car, but in typical Kayla fashion she was probably running late. Deciding to just wait her out, you approach one of the nearby benches. — The spring day is a surprisingly warm one, a gentle breeze soothing over your face as you pull up your phone in order to try and reach your friend. 

You’ve barely made it down to the letter K in your contact list when someone suddenly takes the seat next to you on the bench. Your thumb hovers above Kayla’s name and your body grows rigid as you bite your tongue. You did not have to turn your head to know who it was, for the ring clad fingers that intertwine over his lap tells you everything you need to know. 

Beomgyu quietly hums next to you and you feel your blood go cold. His presence is both invasive and unsettling, and his silence certainly wasn’t helping. How did he know what university you attended — more importantly, why was he here? Because Beomgyu never asked to meet unless he wanted something, and you had never seen him like this, outside and in broad daylight. It terrified you. 

Daring a small glance in his direction, your eyes fall on the dark attire he wore. He gazes ahead as he watches your classmates pass with an almost bored expression on his face. Try as you might but there was no telling if he was angry with you or not. Had he not gotten your message and was that why he was here? Or had he gotten it and that was why he was here? 

You anxiously chew on the inside of your cheek, keeping your attention intently fixed on your phone in your hands. The thick silence seemed to drag on forever and you wondered when Kayla might show up, she would be far from pleased when she saw who you were chit-chatting with. 

“Criminal justice?” Beomgyu finally asks, his voice matching the monotone expression on his face. You give a small, almost unnoticeable nod. 

Beomgyu scoffs next to you as he leans back against the hard wood of the bench. He rolls his thumbs over one another, not bothering to glance in your direction. “I’m sure you’ll make a great little detective, dollface.” 

You couldn’t tell if he was being genuine or not, either way you decide against asking. Instead you fiddle with the elastic of your phone case as you await his next words. Your eyes met with a few whom you recognized from your lectures, most just gave awkward smiles, while others attention lingered on Beomgyu. It was safe to say that he stood out amongst the crowd. 

“You were busy yesterday.” He states and you suddenly remember your last conversation, the one which had ended on anything but a good note. — “School project..” You quietly murmur, choosing to leave Taehyun out of the equation. 

“Studies are important”, Beomgyu hums, and it seems as though he’s ready to drop the subject again. But of course you had to go and ruin it. “Did you… Get my message?” The question had been prodding at your mind since yesterday afternoon, and your voice is but a mere whisper as the words leave your lips. 

Beomgyu’s expression flashes with something you can’t quite place. It wasn’t fury but it highlighted his strong distaste for the topic. “Thought I told you not to acquaint yourself with Duri.” He sounds stern, and you felt like you were being scolded. Naturally your gaze drops to the ground and you swallow a gulp. “I know… But there was no other way for me to contact you.” 

“Because you shouldn’t.” He suddenly snaps, his tone teetering on annoyed. Suddenly your conversation begins to feel much like your last. The fear of him walking off on you resurfaces and it felt almost too much to bear. Perhaps that was why you had so abruptly turned in your seat to look at him fully. The action makes him tilt his head in your direction. “But that’s unfair.” 

“How am I supposed to just be available, what if something comes up? How would you know?” You were bordering on sounding whiny, but you couldn’t find it in you to care. Beomgyu raises a brow as he looks at you. You can’t tell if he’s considering your words or holding back laughter, but soon he smirks. “If you’re not available then you’re not.” He says it like it’s the simplest thing in the world, when reality it’s far from it. 

You frown, “Then what about you?” — He shakes his head, “You worry ‘bout yourself, dollface.” 

Your lips part in objection, but before the protest can slip, you hinder yourself. A bitter realization washes over you as you understand what he’d meant. Worry about yourself… Who were you kidding, he wouldn’t have to wait long for another girl to come along if you happened to be unavailable. How naive of you to think that what the two of you had was anything but causal, he’d already proven you that time and time again. 

Now you just looked like an idiot for trying to compromise with him. You bite your lip as you avoid his gaze, wanting to be anywhere but in front of him right now. And it’s almost as if he’s reading your mind because in no less than ten seconds does he rise from his seat. — This was it, he was leaving you again, just like he had that night, and there was nothing you could do to stop him. 

You watch as he makes his way across the parking lot with his hands in his pocket. Once he makes it halfway across does he turn to look at you. The smirk stretching across his face made your heart leap. “You comin’ or not, dollface?”

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[beomiracles]

wait i have a vision, a dark thought, monster beomgyu fucking you while drooling out black blobs into your mouth, making a mess, and telling you to swallow it all in his low voice KSNSKSJSKSJKA 😵‍💫😮‍💨

chat, this is insane.

tw, monster beomgyu, spit kink (?) well it's technically not saliva, penetrative sex, kissing, hm yes.

monster beomgyu with near glowing eyes, dark hair falling in front of his face, sticking to his sweaty forehead as he rams his thick cock inside of you. ― a sharp hiss escaping his lips when he feels you clench around him.

monster beomgyu who isn't quite monster but not quite human either. with sharp, canine-like teeth and claws that dig into your soft skin. a thick and black liquid seeping from the corner of his mouth, dribbling down his chin and landing on your cheek.

you blink as you turn your head away, only for his sharp and pointy claws to clasp around your face as beomgyu pulls you back to him. ― he's delirious, completely gone as his dazed and glowing eyes drift in and out of focus.

whimpering when his hips jerk forward, his cock hitting deep and raw. Beomgyu's smirk is unmistakable, his sharp teeth covered in the uncanny and black liquid. ― you let out a noise of surprise when said substance falls on your bottom lip.

beomgyu seems entranced by the action, his jaw slacking even further as he watches the thick liquid drip onto you. "swallow it." his voice is hoarse, strained and low to the point where you can barely make out his words.

still, your tongue darts out as you taste the black substance, it's unlike anything you've ever felt before, leaving you dizzy as it passes your throat. ― beomgyu groans at the sight, quickly leaning in to press his lips against yours.

you gasp when his wet tongue slips inside your mouth, the messy and dark saliva-like liquid spilling onto your own tongue as he ruts against you relentlessly. ― "f-fuck so pretty", he mumbles, his sentences coming out muffled through the kiss.

when he pulls back, he finds the lower half of your face smeared in that very black substance, and he watches as you carefully lick your lips, his cock twitching inside of you.

[beomiracles]

���𝐑𝐈𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐀𝐋 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐒𝐂𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 TAPE 05

𝓓𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐌 𝓔𝐍𝐓𝐑𝐘 ⸝⸝ Moving rapidly through your career as one of the leading female investigators, you never once encountered a case you couldn't crack. Though you never expected for your past mistakes to come back and haunt you in the form of an ex lover, accused of murder. ⸝⸝

𝓹airings criminal!beomgyu x detective!reader 𝔀arnings references to sexual encounters, blood, mentions of injuries, drinking, red-flag reader (?), no warnings just vibes idk man leave me alone im going to cry.

📼 THE TAPE RECORDINGS

𝓣𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝓢𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐘 contains dark themes portraying unhealthy and toxic relationships and substance abuse. reader discretion is advised ! — this story is partly told in flashbacks, beware of timestamps as past/present are mixed throughout the story.

#serene adds ✎.. the last scene was so god awful hard for me to write for some unknown reason... oh well! I got it out, I'm alive, all is well :3

[ ▶︎ •၊၊||၊|။| TAPE 05 ] — Bloody Bodies recording legnth; 6.4k + PLAYLIST

⸝⸝

📼 — April 29th 2022

“So… What happens now?” Your hushed question feels loud when it passes your swollen lips. Gingerly pulling your panties back on, you cringe at the sticky feeling of the damp fabric against your skin. Beomgyu remains silent next to you as he leans back against the brick wall. For a moment, you wonder if your question had been a stupid one to ask. 

It’s not until you move closer to him, your arm brushing against his that he tilts his head your way, one of his brows tugging upward. “Is something supposed to happen?” He echoes in an almost monotone voice. — Confused, you glance between him and the door only a few steps away. “Are you not going back inside?” 

For the past ten minutes you had been trying to come up with an excuse, rather an explanation to deliver in front of Kayla once you walked back inside the club with Beomgyu. She would be mad, undoubtedly so and your mind raked with different scenarios and outcomes. What would you tell her? Would you even get the chance to introduce him, would he even want you to? Maybe he would just take off as soon as you stepped inside. 

“No.” 

His sigh is like a stone brick thrown right at you, hitting you across the face and leaving an ugly bruise. You blink, in complete disbelief as your gaze darts back toward him. But you had just spent ten whole minutes worrying about what to say. And he wasn’t even going back in? — “You’re not?” It was impossible to hide the disappointment in your voice and you’re almost certain he picked up on it. 

Beomgyu shakes his head before letting it tilt back against the wall behind him. You knew that he was waiting for you to leave, and perhaps you should. Any other day you probably would have, but today it wasn’t enough. The sex only gave you a temporary fix, you needed more. 

“Where are you going?” You straighten out your back, hands falling to your sides as they clenched into fists. You were determined to draw at least a half-assed answer out of him. Beomgyu doesn’t look at you when he replies, “Work.” 

Ah right, work. It was an easy excuse, given that you knew little to nothing about what he did for a living, or anything else regarding him for that matter. That was bound to change. 

“You work nights?” 

He hadn’t expected that question, you could tell by the way his jaw subtly clenched, his hands digging deeper into his pockets. He nods, but his eyes are fixated on something far away, something you couldn’t see. “I do sometimes”, he hums. 

Sometimes? He must work quite odd hours, for night shifts were usually on a tight and regular schedule. “Is it okay for you to drink before work?” You ask with a small frown, silently questioning his move to come here if he knew he had somewhere important to be shortly after. — But Beomgyu merely shrugs as he pushes himself off the cold wall. “I am my own boss, dollface.” His lips curl into the ghost of a smirk when he leans over to kiss your forehead. 

And just like that, he was gone again, and you were left with what seemed even more questions than you’d started with. 

⸝⸝

📼 — PRESENT TIME ; February 22th 2024

“He was a freelancer… Of sorts..” You quietly state and Yeonjun glances up from the files in front of him. “Freelance?” He repeats and you nod as your gaze returns to the photos of the crime scene before you. Your finger drags across the image of the bloodstained cough, cringing as you imagine Beomgyu, covered from head to toe in blood as he lunges at the poor victim. 

“Do you know what kind of freelance?” Your senior then wonders as he flips a page. You did. Though Beomgyu rarely, if ever, discussed work matters with you, you had still caught on to enough where you knew what kind of connections he held, what kind of person he was. — For some reason your lips betray you, “I don’t.” 

You then hastily continue, “He was gone a lot, worked odd hours, came and went.” You shrug, trying your best to divert from the topic you had brought up yourself. You don’t know why you defended him, why you felt the need to take his side. You want to be honest with Yeonjun, hell you want to be honest with yourself. Why did he have to make it so hard? 

Your last conversation a mere two days ago was still fresh in your mind. You wondered if his words actually held any weight. Was it true? Were you still loyal to him, after everything that had happened… Maybe you always will be. The thought was a scary one and you quickly pushed it away. 

Choi Beomgyu was going to prison. He had no alibi, no witnesses, and all evidence pointed at him. All you lacked now was his confession, but that proved to be more than difficult. 

“Why did you do it?” 

Your question is left hanging in the open air, and your fingers curl around the pencil in your hand as you grip it tightly. The all too familiar metal table in front of you gleams under the bright lamp hanging above, the sterile lights reflecting off of its surface. — Beomgyu sighs, sounding tired as his gaze shifts from the wall behind you and over to meet your own. But when his eyes fall on you, they seem to regain their almost mischievous glint. “You’ve got to be a little more specific than that, dollface.” 

Feeling your jaw clench as you fight to stay composed, your gaze flickers to the window on your left. As much as you wanted answers, you couldn’t risk anything with Yeonjun on the other side, listening intently to the conversation taking place. Your heart thumps loudly in your chest as you watch your reflection through the dark glass, you looked as scared as you felt. 

Following your hesitant glance, Beomgyu smirks. It was like he fed on your uncertainty. Every step you faltered allowed him to take at least three forward. You swallow, and then your attention returns to him. “Why did you kill him?” — “Hm?” He attempts to run a hand through his hair, cringing slightly when he realizes that they’re both tied together by the metal cuffs around his wrists. With the small roll of his eyes he continues, “Thought I already told you, I was cleaning up a mes-” 

“No.” 

He pauses, cocking an eyebrow as he watches you with an impassive expression. You draw in a sharp breath. Never had you interrupted him before, never had you dared to. His brows pull together, his vision narrowing if only slightly. “No?” He huffs, the disbelief in his tone evident. — You shake your head softly, the movement small, so minimal that only he could pick up on it. 

“Why did you kill him?” 

Within the four confined walls the already thick air suddenly shifted. You recognized the smirk that tugged across his lips, the way his eyes glimmered with recognition. Beomgyu leans back, his hands clasped neatly together as his thumbs roll over one another. And even though it felt as if the two of you spoke completely different languages, where words were all but an endless game of cat and mouse.. — Sometimes… It was like he could understand you perfectly, as long as you gave him reason to. 

His tongue prods against the inside of his cheek, his lip twitching and for a second it looked like he was holding back laughter. “Dollface”, he drawls, metal cuffs rattling against the metal table when he leans forward. “Why?” He echoes, “Is that what you’re dying to know?” 

Yes. But you never say it out loud. You swallow, your grip on the pencil so tight that it might just snap in half. Beomgyu picks up on it, his eyes flitting down for a second before snapping back up to yours. — You knew that Beomgyu had killed people, you knew that he had blood on his hands. You have seen it yourself. 

⸝⸝

📼 — May 11th 2022

The hotel room is dark. The expensive silk beneath you is cool to the touch and the large bed is cold, for it misses the warmth of another body next to your own. You try to swallow down the lump in your throat, but it won’t budge. It’s quiet, eerily so, and your stomach doesn’t tingle with butterflies as it usually would on a night like this. Instead it twists with dread. 

You reach for your discarded phone, its bright light stings your eyes when you re-read his message. The address was correct, the room number too. But the time… 11:45 pm. Your heart drops when your gaze flickers toward the time indicator on your screen. 

2:31 am. 

He was nearly three hours late. But Beomgyu was never late, in fact, he was always there before you. Often you had wondered how he managed to get from one location to the next, how he never seemed out of place, no matter when and where you met. But tonight things are different. — Had he changed his mind? Did he not want to see you after all? Maybe something had come up… 

Your attention fixates on the shut door. You imagine him walking through it, his dark hair falling across his even darker eyes, the everlasting smirk plastered on his lips. You imagine his voice, the nickname he had for you rolling off his tongue when his arms wrap around your waist. You imagine him kissing you, with a longing that perfectly matched your own. 

But Beomgyu never comes. 

You bite your lip, the idea of going home crossing your mind. It would be rather pathetic to wait here all alone, no? But then he would have spent money on a room left unused. Perhaps you should stay the night.. You could order room service in the morning before leaving. 

The bed frame rattles under your weight when your back reaches the mattress with a thud. Exhausted and anxious, you let your eyes fall shut as you beg for sleep to take you. Even if you worried that he would continue to haunt your nightmares. — Beomgyu always left you clueless, he kept you in the dark. But naive as you were, you thought you would one day get answers to all of your questions. If only you stayed long enough.. 

You don’t know how many hours had passed, perhaps it had been mere minutes. But it was still dark outside when the small click of the door lock startled you awake. Quickly shooting up from the bed, your back presses against the headboard as you grab onto a pillow, not that it would aid in any defense. 

The thick darkness prevents you from making out who the person lingering within the shadows was. Your heart thumps against your ribcage and your free hand blindly searches for your phone, only to freeze in your tracks when his voice cuts through the silence. — “Fuck, are you still here?” Beomgyu’s short breath instantly makes you relax and you slump back against the bed. 

Lowering the pillow from your chest, you swallow. “Sorry, should I have gone home?” You quietly wonder as you shift awkwardly on the mattress. In the everlasting darkness it was impossible to make out his expression, but you hear him heave a sigh. “No it’s fine, I… Fuck I’m sorry, dollface.” 

He takes a couple of steps forward, finally emerging from the shadows and becoming engulfed in the pale light of the moon. You find your gaze lingering by his dark figure, regarding him like it was your last chance, you never knew if it was. — The cold metal of his rings send sparks down your spine when his fingers wrap around your chin. He tilts your face back, his other hand finding a place atop your head as he studies you with a small frown. 

“I got held up at work”, he explains and your eyes widen. It was unusual of him to share as much as a word about his life outside of your encounters, even if it was just a simple apology for his tardiness.

You find yourself leaning into his touch. “It's alright”, you murmur, your eyes half lidded when you peer up at him, “You can always make it up to me.” 

Beomgyu chuckles, his hands sliding down your sides as he guides you back onto the mattress. The kisses he places to the side of your neck and down your collarbone are warm and familiar. That very warmth seeps into the cold vines that have tightened around your chest, gradually loosening them up.

You don’t question where he had been or what had made him take so long, you knew that you would never receive an answer. Instead you clung onto this fragile moment of intimacy, for you never knew if it were to be your last. 

Letting your hands trail along his still clothed chest, your fingers toy with the hem of his shirt, tugging on it as you pull him closer. Just as you’re about to push the garment up above his torso, do you freeze. There was an undeniable wet patch on the soft cotton. But when your lips part in an unspoken question, Beomgyu’s sudden kiss to your open mouth makes you lose your sense of direction. 

Allowing him to kiss you for a moment, your hands halt as your fingers nervously fiddle with his shirt. But when you find that the damp spot only grows, you can’t ignore it anymore. — “What’s that?” You half-hearted whisper against his lips, torn between satiating your burning curiosity and saving this sacred moment. 

“Hm?” Beomgyu hums against you, his kisses becoming all the more persistent in an attempt to sway your curious mind elsewhere. He ignores it when your hands brace themselves on his chest, and it’s not until you speak that he finally pulls back an inch. “Beomgyu, there’s something on your shirt..” 

With an outstretched arm you flick on the small light on the bedside table. Given a second to adjust to the warm glow, your eyes widen as soon as they fall on the dark crimson stain covering his grey shirt. — Was that… blood? 

Immediately you jerk back, your gaze flitting down to your now stained fingers. It was fresh. “Oh my god”, is all you can muster and before he has the chance to object your hands are insistently bunching his shirt up above his chest. — “Dollface”, Beomgyu tries, his fingers gently wrapping around your wrists but you merely shrug him off, all too focused on the blood smeared across his skin. 

“What happened- Are you hurt? Why didn’t you say something?” The words all come bubbling to the surface, passing your lips without crossing your mind twice. It’s not until your trembling fingers swipe across his very much untainted chest that a brief silence falls over the two of you. He doesn’t wince or draw back at your finger’s probing, because he wasn’t hurt in the first place. 

Beomgyu sighs, his hands brushing along your forearms. “It’s not mine”, he says, his voice is low, calm, as if trying to reassure you that everything was fine when it quite clearly wasn’t. How could he say something like that so casually? And what did he mean by not his? Who else if not him… 

You swallow, the sound near deafening in the otherwise quiet room. All previous desire and longing has now washed off, the heat of his kisses and his touch no longer linger. You felt cold, left with an uncanny feeling in the deepest pits of your stomach. — You refuse to look him in the eyes, “What happened?” 

He doesn’t answer right away. Was he thinking of an excuse? Was he conjuring yet another lie? Maybe he was debating on telling the truth for once. His thumbs rub soothing circles across your wrists, the small action however, had an opposite effect. You couldn’t tear your gaze from the blood, there was so much of it. 

“Told you I got held up at work didn’t I?” He finally says, pulling you close in order to press a kiss to your forehead. His words didn’t matter, they couldn’t erase the uneasiness that had begun to build inside of you. Instead you draw in a deep breath, shifting on the bed as you lean back to peer up at him. “What exactly do you do for work?” 

Beomgyu lets go of your wrists as he bites the inside of his cheek. He runs a hand through his dark hair and you intently follow the action. Whilst studying him under the faint glow of the bedside lamp, you notice just how rough he was looking, and that didn’t have to do with the blood tainting his chest. His hair was disheveled, his eyes sunken in, his skin was pale and there was a small cut on his upper lip. 

He looked exhausted. 

“It’s a business”, he begins in a low tone, drawing his words out as he talks slowly. His gaze flickers over the deep frown etched across your face and he presses the palm of his hand to your cheek. “I merely make sure that deals go through”, he says as his thumb slides between your furrowed brows, as if trying to ease your expression. 

You shake your head, unconvinced by his vague response. “What kind of business ends in you looking like that?” There’s an underlying sense of accusation to your question and despite the subtle clench of his jaw, Beomgyu continues his soft caress to your face. “Our client hurt himself, pure accident. — Had to get him help, it took longer than I expected.” 

He sends you a small smile, and you want to believe him, you really do. You want to believe that Beomgyu was just your average person, living an average life. But you knew that he wasn’t And you knew that he was lying to you right now. Beomgyu lied a lot. What you didn’t know was if his lies were good or bad intentions. 

It scared you. 

⸝⸝

📼 — May 11th 2022

You didn’t think Beomgyu was a murderer. No, that would be extreme. Yet you found yourself ignoring his messages. He’d sent two. Just like usual they had contained two separate addresses, two separate times. You’d officially stood him up twice. He told you that he was okay with it, that he didn’t mind, so you took his word for it. — On the fourth day you think he might stop, that he might grow tired of your persistent no-shows and move over to the next woman waiting on his call. But as you sit in class that very afternoon, your phone vibrates with the indication of yet another text. You felt your stomach twist. 

Of course, you were right. The second your eyes fall on the short message you completely lose track of your surroundings. He was insistent, you’d give him that. But surely this would be the last time he’d ask for you. You had spent weeks, almost two months chasing after him. Suppose a small part of you thought of this as payback. 

Perhaps that was what caused you to act without reasoning as you turned in your seat. A light tap to Taehyun’s shoulder makes his eyes divert from the board ahead and over to you. “Hm?” He asks as he taps his pencil against the pages of his notebook. You feel your lips tug into a smirk that’s familiar yet most uncharacteristic on you. 

“Do you want to go clubbing tonight?” 

Taehyun sputters at your words, his jaw slacking as he glances around like you’d just asked him to go down on you. “T-Tonight? Me and you? Clubbing?” He seems almost baffled at the proposal, even more so when you quickly nod. — “Sure why not?” You drawl as the smirk on your lips only grows. You trusted your classmate enough to share a drink or two with him. Besides, Taehyun was a good guy, there was no harm in getting to know him better was there?

He hesitates for a moment, gaze flitting between your professor by the front of the classroom and back to you. “But what about class tomorrow?” He wonders and you shake your head. “Class is canceled, didn’t you hear? Mrs Yang is ill.” — His mouth forms into a small ‘o’ shape as he hums. 

“Sure I guess… Do you have a place in mind?” 

“Are you sure you know where we are?” Taehyun sounds wary as he trails behind you, he’s like a skittish animal, ready to jump at the tiniest of sounds. He briefly stops to inspect an old street sign, only to jog after you like somewhat of a lost puppy. You, on the other hand, walk with long and determined strides, your feet carrying you through the narrow alleyway with a confidence you couldn’t quite recognize. — “Don’t worry, I’ve been here before.” 

Sure enough, the familiar entrance soon floats into vision. The same cold purple hues dance across the dark brick walls, casting the street in an eerie glow. You don’t know why you had picked this place, why it had seemed like a good idea, but now there was no going back. — You swallow the lump in your throat as images of you, walking down this very path not long ago, flashes before your eyes. 

You recognize the bouncer, the one who’d refused your entry last time. Part of your worries that he might do so again, this time you had no Beomgyu to rely on. The concept was both terrifying and freeing. This was the very first address he’d ever sent you, perhaps that was why the memory was still so vivid in your mind. Something about this place was different, special.

The sharp light of your phone screen illuminates your face as you check the message one final time. ‘Address, room number, 11:00 pm.’ You glance toward the clock on top of your screen, indicating a menacing 2:37 am. He would’ve left by now, surely pissed off with being stood up a third time, which means… Your gaze drifts toward the entrance mere feet away, the thumping rhythm of bass already drumming through your chest. 

You wanted to see Beomgyu, that was the truth. You just didn’t want to see him. The chances of catching a glimpse of him were slim, but if there was anywhere you’d be able to find him, it would be here. Why? — Well because your gut told you so. 

Taehyun grabs ahold of your arm when you make a move to approach the bouncer. “Why don’t we just go back?” He murmurs, the words coming out hushed. You shrug him off, shaking your head as you march toward the large man. This was it, you would give it your best shot. — Straightening your back, you push out your shoulders as far as they would go, your gaze narrowed when you glance up at him. 

The bouncer peers down at you through his dark sunglasses, then he frowns, lifting a finger as he pushes them down on his nose. His eyes meet yours and there’s a flash of recognition. “Miss”, he drawls, a small grin splayed across his otherwise stern face. “How delightful of you to join us tonight.” — He steps aside, allowing you both inside, though not without sending Taehyun a harsh glare. 

“Do you know him?” Your classmate asks as he stays close to you. — The smirk on your lips grows and you shrug, “Sort of.” 

The interior of the place was just like you had remembered it. The large dancefloor, the purple lights, the booths shoved against the walls, not to mention the lack of a bar as drinks were being passed around by the many waiters. — Somewhere behind you Taehyun lets out a short breath, gawking as he takes in his surroundings. But your eyes were only in search of one thing, of one person. And when you don't find him, you pull your friend along as you scour the outskirts of the crowded floor. 

Upon passing a waiter on bystand, you snag two glasses off of his plate, handing one of them to Taehyun. He seems skeptical as he peers down at his drink, “Do you even know what’s in these?” — You shake your head, “Nope.” That was the least of your concerns. 

Your eyes fall on the grand staircase when you bring the cool glass to your lips. The steps looked much different tonight than they had back then. Tonight they felt untouchable. There was no way you would be getting up there… At least now without a little help. 

“Where are you going?” Taehyun calls for you, and you hear him rushing after you as he pushes past the people in his way. You know that you should stop and give him at least a half-assed explanation, maybe even ask him to wait somewhere else. But your mind is entirely preoccupied with the sight before you. — “I’m serious, what are you-” He cuts himself off when he crashes into your shoulder, stumbling backward as he grips his drink tightly. 

You’ve stopped in front of one of the many booths lining the walls, and Taehyun peers over your shoulder as he tries to make sense of the situation. The unfamiliar faces to him are ones you recognize with fright. 

“No way”, a deep voice drawls, “Dollface, is that you?” 

Duri leans forward, his hand, previously on the thigh of the girl next to him, withdrawing as he runs it through his short hair. You feel your stomach draw into knots at the persistent use of that nickname, the one that sounded so sickeningly wrong coming from his lips. — Duri chuckles as he shakes his head in disbelief. 

“We seem to bump into one another quite a lot”, he muses, even though he knew that tonight had been no coincidence. You had come with clear intentions in mind, you were certain he could tell. — “Yes.” You send him a tight lipped smile, “So it seems.” 

You could practically feel the confusion radiate off of Taehyun as he shifts awkwardly behind you, his eyes darting between Duri and the men surrounding him. You try not to pay his presence any mind as you focus your attention on the target before you. 

“Say”, Duri leans forward as he grabs one of the drinks set aside on the table between you, “What can I do for you tonight?” 

Your lips part, the grip on your glass tightening significantly as you throw a glance over your shoulder, your eyes automatically landing on the staircase. The steps seemed to shimmer under the purple lights. Duri hums behind you, snapping your attention right back to where it should have remained all along. 

He brings his drink to his lips, taking a long sip as he peers at you over the rim of his glass. “Pray tell, what business do you have there?” He wonders as he busies himself with another sip. You shake your head, your gaze unwavering as you say, “That’s none of your concern.” 

Duri chuckles, the sound rough and raspy as it builds in his chest. His friends all join in, their laughter echoing off of the booth’s walls. You ignore them, patiently waiting them out as you twist the foot of your glass between your fingers. — After a long minute Duri finally nods, “He’s rubbing off on you.” 

The comment makes your face burn and you resist the urge to avert your gaze. Painfully, you watch as he leans over to share a kiss with the woman next to him, parting for a moment to whisper something in her ear. Then he sits back, slamming his drink down on the table with a little too much force. “Fair”, he agrees as he rises to his feet. 

Bewildered, you watch as he makes his way around the table, giving your shoulder a harsh pat before making his way toward the staircase. — “Come on”, you urge Taehyun as you hurriedly follow Duri’s tall frame through the ocean of people. Your classmate’s complaints are audible as he whines behind you. “Have you really thought this through?” He questions, his breath warm against the back of your neck, “I mean, look at the guy! We should not be following someone like him to-” 

He’s cut short when Duri suddenly stops by the first step. “Ah”, he exhales as he turns on his heel, his piercing gaze falling on Taehyun. “Seems I have yet to introduce myself, pardon me.” — He extends a rough hand and you watch as Taehyun gingerly takes it in his. “Duri”, he says, the menacing smirk on his lips making your friend cower as he mumbles out a quiet, “Taehyun..” 

It looked as though Duri was holding back laughter when he turned back to you. “Shall we?” He glances in the direction of the grand doors atop the stairs and you nod. 

When you had first climbed these steps, with Beomgyu’s hand on your lower back, the world had been spinning. Each step had felt like one closer to the edge of a misty cliff, where the fog was so thick that it had been impossible to deem the trauma of the fall you might take. — Tonight it felt different. The cliff was no longer enveloped in mist, you saw things clearly now. You saw him clearly. That’s what you had told yourself. 

Each step you take feels both empowering and deafening. The moment lasts forever yet it’s somehow over in a second. And before you know it, you’re faced with the grand doors leading into the VIP section. — Duri stops, his hand on the door handle as he sends the guards a small look of acknowledgement. 

“I think you’ll be fine from here”, he states, the finalization in his tone evident. Wordlessly he pushes the large doors open, motioning for you to step inside. You do so without hesitation, not sparing Duri as much as a second glance when you pass him. 

It’s quiet here, the air is lighter, cleaner. Just like you’d remembered it. Taehyun’s presence is hard to ignore as he clings to your side, the heat radiating off of him as his skittish eyes dart around the room. Almost all booths are occupied already, but you manage to find an empty one by the very edge. 

“Did you know him?” Taehyun whispers when you sit back against the soft cushions. You nod, your gaze still roaming the open space as you absentmindedly bring your drink to your lips, “Sort of.” — Your classmate frowns, and you knew all too well from the look on his face that he was far from satisfied with your answer. 

Your eyes jump from booth to booth, quickly skimming the people populating them as you fervently search for your target. But it’s not even been a full minute when Taehyun interrupts you again. — “Why are we here?” His voice is even quieter now, as if hesitant to even ask the question out loud. “Are you looking for someone?” He then adds when he notices your distant gaze. 

You hum, shaking your head as you lean back against the velvety cushion. “No.” But that was a lie, your first of many. And just as the simple word leaves your lips do you finally find him. All the way across the room, shielded by the man standing before him, yet you could clearly make out his dark hair amongst the rest. 

Suddenly your throat feels dry, and you gulp down another mouthful of your beverage. He’d come here after all. A small, naive part of you had hoped and wished that he would stay, that he would linger within the empty hotel room as he waited for your arrival. But it seems he’d moved quickly. 

It doesn’t take long for you to notice the unfamiliar woman draped on his arm. The sight shouldn’t surprise you anymore, but your heart still skips a beat. She was your replacement. And though she was far from anything you represented, he’d still turned to her when you were a no-show rather than wallowing his sorrows alone at night. — You shouldn’t have expected anything less of him. He was Choi Beomgyu after all. 

He hasn’t noticed you and appears preoccupied with whatever conversation he was currently indulged in. You wish he would notice you. You crave his eyes on you. You long for the way a simple glance from him could make you feel. 

You’d stood him up a third time tonight, and it had made you feel in control. For once you were deciding, and not him. So why was it that you felt so utterly powerless at this very moment? Why was it that your eyes searched his when he couldn’t be bothered to even gaze your way? 

You turn to Taehyun, he was watching you with a small frown. “You don’t like it here?” You ask, the tension falling from your face as you regard his awkward frame. Taehyun shrugs, his warm eyes flitting to the drink in his hand. “It’s alright”, he says, but you catch the hesitation in his voice. 

He chokes on the liquor when your hand brushes along his thigh. “Don’t worry”, you hum as you settle against the booth wall, “We can leave again if you’d like.” Taehyun swallows as he glances between the smile on your lips and to your fingers splayed across his leg. An unfamiliar tint spreads across his cheek when he clears his throat and you find yourself enjoying the sight. 

“It’s fine, really.” He assures you as he takes another small sip of his drink. Though he makes no attempt at shrugging you off. You could still sense his confusion, and you didn’t blame him. You were acting far too uncharacteristically even for your own liking. You had barely recognized yourself when you’d approached Duri. The sudden surge of confidence was unlike anything you’d ever felt before, and the rush it had left behind still tingled in the depths of your stomach. 

It was the length you were willing to go in order to see him, to see Beomgyu. 

Your gaze drifts toward him on its own, and it’s not until his dark eyes fall on yours that you realize just how long and intently you’d been staring at him. He pauses mid sentence, his expression being struck with something you couldn’t quite decipher from this far away. Any other instance you would’ve probably looked away, hid behind nervous laughter or pretended like you hadn’t noticed him in the first place. 

But tonight you don’t feel like yourself. — So you hold his gaze. You want him to see you, all of you. You want him to know that you were here, that you had come without him and that you weren’t planning on changing said fact. 

Beomgyu shifts where he stands on the other side of the room. His fingers, that had previously been drawing small circles on the waist of the woman next to him, stopped. She’s talking to him, her lips move but you can’t make out what she’s saying, and you’re certain that he’s not listening either. 

You can’t tell if he’s angry, you hope he is. Was it selfish? You wanted to pull any other emotion besides lust out of him. You wanted him to feel what you felt every single moment spent in his absence, was that so wrong? — You think you might have succeeded when his hand falls from her waist. 

“I want to go home.” 

The words escape before you can stop them and you lean forward to place your now empty glass on the table before you. Taehyun’s frown returns, and you feel him shift under your hand. “But we just got here? I thought you wanted to-” — “I changed my mind.” You firmly state, not tearing your gaze from Beomgyu as you watch his jaw clench. 

You had gotten what you came here for. A small, but noticeable reaction, one that you’d created. Now all that remained was to safely evacuate before he had the chance to approach you. — With that you rise to your feet, blinking as blood rushes to your head. Taehyun is quick to follow as he gulps down the last of his drink. 

“Hey, wait are you-” His protests are lost on you as you head for the door. Through the corner of your eye you catch Beomgyu’s dark figure moving, coming closer. You quicken your pace, desperate to get away from a situation you had caused yourself. And you were so close, the door handle almost within reach when suddenly, a hand wrapped around your wrist.

You freeze. Their grip is firm, unwavering and demanding as they tug you backward. This was it, this had been a mistake. One temporary rush of confidence had led you to believe that you were actually in control. And now you were about to pay the price for your foolish actions. With your heart in your throat, you turn. 

It’s Taehyun. 

His expression is tense and guarded. It seemed he finally reached his peak. The warmth in his eyes feels distant as he regards you with a narrowed gaze. “What’s going on with you?” He spits the words out, and though you can tell that he’s trying his hardest to appear stoic, you can see the concern swirling in his irises. 

“You want one thing then the next, you’re making no sense and I…” You stop listening, his rambling becomes background noise when you catch Beomgyu not far behind him. Dark strands falling across his face, the rings on his fingers glimmering under the lights as he runs them through his hair. He’s stopped, and you wonder why. 

Your gaze shifts between Taehyun’s worried expression and his motionless one. In that moment, you realize just how much power Beomgyu holds over you, the extreme lengths he makes you go to just to end up hurt in the end. — You didn’t want to feel like that anymore. 

“Taehyun.” His endless rambling is cut short when his name leaves your lips. His eyes, despite the conflict buried within them, are nothing like Beomgyu’s. No, his eyes are gentle, even like this, even when they shouldn’t be. Even when you didn’t deserve it. Your gaze flickers over to Beomgyu one last time before they return to him. 

“Can you kiss me?” 

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[beomiracles]

darkish thought because I love mentally ill love yandere horror tropes and beomgyu, so why not put two and two together?! >3< (fyi this is my first time writing lols..)

imagine beomgyu as the quiet, intimidating kid at school. no one dared to approach him because he just gave off this unsettling vibe—except for y/n, who was always so cheerful and saw the good in everything. beomgyu didn’t understand how someone like her could exist, so pure, so sweet. it frustrated him. it consumed him. he wanted to be the one to destroy her innocence, to ruin her from the inside out. his obsession spiraled until he couldn’t take it anymore, so much so that one day he snapped and ended up kidnapping her, having her all to himself, to do as he pleased. <3

y/n woke up in his basement, tied up, blindfolded, and gagged, completely at his mercy. if feeling the tip of a knife gliding down y/n's trembling bare thighs wasn’t enough, her heart completely dropped when she heard that all-too-familiar voice.

"dumb girl~ haven’t you learned not to trust everyone?" beomgyu chuckles darkly, almost mocking. "lucky for me though..." he let the blade glide further up, earning a muffled squeak from her as it grazed against her most sensitive spot ''..now you’re right where i wanted"

you cappin, ain't no way this is your first time writing gawd lawd.. I mean you've basically done all the work here, but I shall indulge nonetheless.

tw, kidnapping, beomgyu is very unstable but what's new in these thoughts, use of knife, implied violence and blunt force trauma, nonconsensual bondage, hints at further sexual advances

the weird kid of class D, that's what they called him. with long and dark hair, shielding his sickeningly pale face. his hunched posture and strange attire making him a laughing stock all around school. ― still, people knew to stay out of Beomgyu's way. it was kind of common sense by now, for all except one.

you didn't think beomgyu was much different from anyone else. perhaps it was why you'd joined him in the cafeteria that day; your tray nudging his as you squeezed in next to him with a wide grin. ― it doesn't bother you when he ignores your advances, when he turns away and mutters a few curses under his breath.

your persistence doesn't waver, and soon you find yourself by his more than your own friends. and even though he rarely talks to you, or even pays your presence any mind, he doesn't make a move to shake you off.

naive as you were, you thought that beomgyu only needed an opportunity, a chance to show his worth. you feel almost heroic when you think about the fact that you were the one presenting him with it.

had you if only once stopped to look around, to see what was actually happening around you, maybe then you would've noticed how everyone else seem to draw back whenever you walked alongside him. perhaps then you would've caught their hesitant faces and worried glances.

"will you come to my house this Friday?"

you had practically squealed when he first asked. excitedly jumping up and down as you accept his invite. ― this was it, you were finally breaking through his thick shell. weeks worth of effort finally paying off !

it did not feel rewarding to wake up cold and confused in complete darkness. in fact it felt utterly terrifying. frantically your head jerks from side to side, unable to see through the thick blindfold that covered your wet eyes.

with your wrists bound behind your back, the ropes around your skin burned as they tightened with each tug you gave. your ankles felt sore, bloody like someone had beaten them, they, too, were tied. ― something large and round keeps your jaw locked in an uncomfortable position, drool running down your chin as you struggle to speak.

footsteps echo in the dark and you emit a muffled scream as you try to retreat. the failed attempt at fleeing merely ends with your barely dressed body pressed against a cold stone wall. ― with your breath caught in your throat you listen as someone approaches, the presence looming before you as it exhales a deep breath, sounding almost like a hum.

"look at you.." the voice speaks, it's dark and menacing, upholding a mocking tone. your blood runs cold as you recognise it. beomgyu. but that didn't make any sense why was he... when did this..

your whiny protests come out as incoherent nonsense around the gag and beomgyu chuckles, it's sinister rumble echoing against the four walls of his basement. ― "dumb girl~ haven’t you learned not to trust everyone?" he's crouched down before you now, you can feel his warm breath on your face, it makes you recoil.

Beomgyu's fingers are harsh and unforgiving as they seal around your arm, keeping you in place. "lucky for me though..." he drawls, pausing to listen to the hitch of your breath as something cold comes in contact with your tender flesh. a knife.

''..now you’re right where i wanted"

the knife glides along the inner part of your thigh, it's pointy edge poking at your soft skin and you whimper as you shake your head. beomgyu lets out a short breath, like he wasn't believing his own eyes, and with one flick off the knife he cuts your panties in half.

"don't worry", he quickly shushes your scream with false sympathy, "if you promise not to scream, I'll go easy on you"

[beomiracles]

Beomie (man is just sick in my head i can't think of anybody else in txt able to do this) as the captor. Sickly arranging play hunt or hide and seek every month just for the thrill of it, making it super realistic and possible for his girl to escape but she always fails.

are u insane lol. I love this. full fic on this one when?

tw, kidnapping, imprisonment, prey/predator, beomgyu is lowkey very insane, injuries/blood.

your fingers dig into the soil, dirt gathering under your nails as you crawl forward. it was dark, you could barely make out the path ahead, but you knew that you had to keep going. his laugh, sinister and maniac, echoes around you, but where it's coming from you can't tell.

it was futile, you knew that much. he would do this every single time. he would feed you with hope, he would make you believe that this time, this time you actually had a chance. ― but he would never let you go, this was all part of his games.

still, as the light of the main road comes into vision, you slowly find yourself filled with that very hope. you crawl with newfound desperation, ignoring the flaring pain that shot through your bleeding leg. ― freedom was within your grasp.

"h-help..!" your voice is hoarse, strained thanks to the effort it took just to move forward. "someone help me!"

a branch snaps somewhere behind you, and your blood runs cold. beomgyu's voice echoes through the dark trees, the sound is sickening to your ears. ― "warm or cold?" he sing-songs, his light and cherry tone laced with malice.

you don't reply, intent on following the dim light ahead as you fight for your freedom, for your life. ― "oh come on now, give me a hint!" the demand is followed by a chuckle that made the leaves on the trees turn away. the whole forest cowered at the sound.

tears flow down your cheeks, and you bite down on your lip hard enough to draw blood, anything to stop yourself from making noise. this would be the time you actually made it, this would be your salvation. you would finally be free of him and you-

"warm."

his voice is closer now, a lot closer. fuck, how did he manage to trail you like this. you pick up your pace, your arms scraping the cold and hard ground as you crawl forward. you're panting, loud enough for him to hear you're certain of that.

bushes rustle behind you, twigs snapping and his sinister fucking laugh ringing in your ears. ― "warmer..." you can make out his voice perfectly now, he couldn't be far.

but the road was so close, it was just there, just within reach. you see cars passing, their strong headlights blinding you as they drive by. this time you don't care anymore, you scream at the top of your lungs, begging and pleading for someone to help you, to save you.

"please! please help me!" ― "help please!"

it's to no avail. there was no one coming for you now. you had no one to rely on but yourself. groaning in pain, you struggle forward, sweat pooling on your forehead and running down the sides of your face. ― "warmer!" he sounds excited, almost squealing now.

desperation consumes you, terror and fright pulsating with each furious beat of your heart. just a little more...just a tiny bit more...

a firm hand wraps around your ankle, his grip harsh and unforgiving. you freeze, your heart practically stopping as all hope vanishes within the blink of an eye. ― beomgyu's chuckle is low as it rumbles within his chest, and you can feel his hot breath against your neck.

"gotcha."

he yanks you backward and you let out an ear piercing scream as the lights of the road ahead shrink until they're no longer within sight. ― beomgyu flips you onto your back, his dark and wide pupils meeting your terrified eyes.

"you lost", he states, a wide grin plastered across his face. your stomach drops, and you struggle to swallow a big fat gulp. beomgyu's fingers are hot against your cheek as he turns you face in his hands. "it's alright.." he murmurs as he leans in to press a soft kiss to your lips. you cringe at the action.

"I'll let you try again next month."

[beomiracles]

𝐂𝐑𝐈𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐀𝐋 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐒𝐂𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 TAPE 04

𝓓𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐌 𝓔𝐍𝐓𝐑𝐘 ⸝⸝ Moving rapidly through your career as one of the leading female investigators, you never once encountered a case you couldn't crack. Though you never expected for your past mistakes to come back and haunt you in the form of an ex lover, accused of murder. ⸝⸝

𝓹airings criminal!beomgyu x detective!reader 𝔀arnings drinking, kissing, vaginal fingering, public sex, creampie, biting? (lol how tf do I tag that), tiny bit of hair pulling (beomgyu receiving), smoking, references to blood but nothing detailed !

📼 THE TAPE RECORDINGS

𝓣𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝓢𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐘 contains dark themes portraying unhealthy and toxic relationships and substance abuse. reader discretion is advised ! — this story is partly told in flashbacks, beware of timestamps as past/present are mixed throughout the story.

#serene adds ✎.. SQUEE GUYS!! all of the tapes have officially been re-released! from here forward it will only be entirely new tapes !! I hope you guys are as excited as I am for this :3

[ ▶︎ •၊၊||၊|။| TAPE 04 ] — I Don't Smoke — recording length; 6.1k + PLAYLIST

📼 — PRESENT TIME ; February 20th 2024

You could not sleep that night. No matter how hard you tossed and turned, you couldn’t pull the images of him from your mind. Your conversation rings in your head, replaying itself over and over until every last word was engraved in your heart. The warmth of his breath against your face hovers above you, a ghost-like memory, an almost lucid one. 

With a tired groan you roll over on your stomach, burying your face in the pillow as you prepare to go through the evening’s events once more. 

“Yet you’re here.” — “But you shouldn’t be.” 

No. You shouldn’t be here. Seeing detained suspects outside of office hours, with no surveillance, it was most prohibited. Your mere presence here could quite frankly cost you your job, the one you had worked so hard for. But this was different. This wasn’t about now, it was about then. You weren’t a detective tonight, and he wasn’t a suspect. You were you and he was him. Just like it had been ten months ago. 

Beomgyu catches your inner struggle, the already present smirk on his lips stretching wider. “So why are you?” He lets his head fall to the side, the question echoing down the vacant hallway. You knew why, yet you had hoped he wouldn’t ask. But of course, Beomgyu saw right through you, and he’d always known exactly where to push in order for you to finally crack. 

Patience was not something he lacked and so he waited patiently when you fiddled with the back of your earring, twiddled with the hem of your sleeve, glanced down the corridor and then back up. Without the files in your hand, without his hands chained in front of him, and without the large metal table parting you, he somehow felt closer. This was far more intimate than any of your previous encounters since his arrival yesterday night. And you hate it. 

“I need answers.” Your voice is thick, laced with a hint of worry, constantly aware of the dangers of your situation. You were gambling with both your heart and your position here. — Beomgyu huffs, the sound coming out as a quiet chuckle when he shakes his head. 

“I thought that was what our sessions were for, no? He quirks a brow, but you know better than to fall for it. He knew that it wasn’t why you had come. — You shake your head firmly, “It’s not the kind of answers I want.”

His lip twitches, his smirk not faltering one bit. 

“Something you can’t share with that colleague of yours?” 

You frown, hands balling into fists by your sides. “Something that doesn’t concern him”, you state as you press your lips into a thin line. Your heart is beating loudly against your chest, its persistent thump playing in your ears akin to a heavy drum; a constant reminder of the power he still holds over you, even as he sits inside a small cell. 

Beomgyu hums, his fingers trailing the outline of the small window. You find your gaze lingering by the metal rings adorning them as they glint in the soft light coming from behind him. “Well go on then”, he pauses, dark eyes flickering from the dust on his finger and over to yours as they narrow, “You’ve never been one to shy away from asking questions, dollface.” 

You swallow. 

For the past ten months you had wondered what it would be like to come face to face with him once more. What would you tell him? Part of you wanted to blatantly ignore him, to act as if he had never even existed in your life. That was a satisfactory thought, one you allowed yourself to imagine in order to feel better. 

You knew that you wouldn’t be able to refrain from indulging as soon as your eyes landed on him though. There were at least a thousand questions soaring through your mind, questions you had longed to ask for what felt like forever. — But as you stand before him, with your heart beating out of your chest and sweat pooling on your forehead, you suddenly find yourself at loss for words. 

“That night”, you slowly begin, drawing your speech out as you try your hardest to gauge his reaction. He isn’t interrupting you, instead he waits patiently as ever for you to finish. “You did not come after me.” His eyes narrow. — “Why didn’t you?” 

He remains silent. And for a moment you worry that he might not give you an answer at all, it wouldn’t be the first he did. His brow twitches, and for a moment he looks almost confused. But that quickly fades and is soon replaced by his ever stoic expression. “Did you want me to?” He returns your question with one of his own. 

Did you want him to? Back then you had feared that he would.. But when he hadn’t.. When you had been left all alone with your own thoughts, the ones that had been chained under his presence, you suddenly found yourself lost. — “It doesn’t matter if I wanted you to or not.” You fold your arms across your chest, “Why didn’t you?” 

He exhales, the smirk on his face falling as his features twist into something gloomy. “I read your note.” The following silence is deafening, despite his words coming out a mere breath. You feel your blood go cold. — The note. You remember the small and wrinkly piece of paper all too well, the blurry lines you had so quickly scribbled down, the ink ruined by your own tears. You didn’t think that he had actually read it. It had merely existed to dull the ache of your own wounds, never had you imagined him actually… 

Suddenly the memories all come crashing down on you in picture perfect quality, the memories you had longed to forget. The blood, the blood on his hands. There had been so much blood. The red crimson had mixed with the rain, heavy and hard as it poured over you. Goosebumps rise on your skin and you pull your gaze from his. 

It had been a bad idea to come here. You should have stayed away. 

The cold metal of his rings startle you when Beomgyu’s hand suddenly reaches for your chin. You hadn’t realized just how close you were standing to the door. Close enough for his hand to reach through the small window, for his fingers to lock your head in place as they grasped your jaw. 

“Leaving so soon, dollface? — I thought you wanted answers.” His voice is low as he studies your frightened expression with a taunting one. Your wide eyes dart down the hallway before returning back to him. “Let me go”, you seethe as you try to shrug him off. 

His grip tightens before it eases, and with a quiet hum his knuckles caress your cheek, the action makes you shudder. “I am many things, dollface”, he murmurs as he lets you go, his hand slipping back through the small window as he takes a step back, the darkness of his cell immediately consuming half his face. — “But I am not that.” 

Then he turns away from you, and you can just about make out his figure in the dark as he heads for the small bed provided. He sits down on it, his elbows on his knees as he turns the rings on his fingers. — Everything is quiet, even the beating of your own heart has dulled into faint background noise. 

You let out a breath you didn’t even know you had been holding in. You knew that you weren’t going to get another word out of him, and with a defeated sigh you reached for the hatch on the window. But as your fingers grasp the small lock, he suddenly speaks up. — “You haven’t told them what you saw.” The statement sends a chill down your spine, because you knew exactly what he was referring to. You knew all too well. 

Beomgyu lifts his head, the dark strands of his long hair falling from his face. He turns your way, his dark eyes finding yours in an instant. “If you did, I wouldn’t be here right now.” The truth is harsh and bitter, it makes you feel guilty, ashamed even. But Beomgyu smirks, a small chuckle passing his lips. “Perhaps I was wrong about you, dollface.” 

His gaze zeroes on your hand, hesitating by the window hatch. — “Just how deep does your loyalty still run?” 

⸝⸝

📼 — April 29th 2022

“Oh please”, Kayla pleads, her voice sounds near desperate on the other line. You push your phone to your ear, balancing it on your shoulder as you continue to wipe down the table you had just cleared. “I don’t know, there’s just so much coursework and then I’m working again tomorrow afternoon.” 

You tried to swiftly avoid a blunt ‘no’ as you worked around your answer. Kayla had been pestering you to go out with her for days since it ‘had been so long’ since last. You knew better, it was just another excuse since she and her so-called ‘boyfriend’ were on yet another break and your friend longed to rebound with the first suitable candidate. 

Though you would admit that you had been neglecting your duties as her friend. From the dismissed texts to the unreturned calls. Suppose you felt guilty for going behind her back like this, you knew that Beomgyu was the last person she’d want to see you acquainted with, and you were doing just that. So you had distanced yourself. 

The right thing would be to go out with her, but tonight… It wasn’t like your excuses weren’t valid. You were busy, still, a small part of you wanted to keep your calendar clear, just in case Beomgyu would text. It was pathetic really, seeing as you hadn’t heard from him in nearly two weeks. — You bit your lip as you thought about what could possibly be keeping him from you. Work? You had no clue of what he did for a living for Beomgyu was very vague about his private life. He didn’t tell you much, then again, you never asked. 

“Fine”, you groan as you set the cloth aside to move over to the next table. Kayla squeals on the phone as she promises that the two of you are going to have a blast. Though your amusement didn’t quite reach her levels, you still agreed as you settled on details. — When the call ends you shove your phone back into your pocket to resume working. 

You’re about halfway done clearing the table, with plates stacked on both your arms as you maneuver around the chairs, when a voice from behind startles you. “Here, let me help you with these”, Soobin says as he takes a handful of plates from you. — “O-Oh! Thank you.” You give him a sheepish smile as you allow him to walk you back toward the kitchen doors. 

Soobin’s parents ran the restaurant you were working at, and despite him being a couple years your senior, the two of you got along well as he often stopped by to help his mom and dad out. — “How have you been?” He asks when holding the door open for you. Giving him a thankful nod, you shrug, “Tired, overworked and exhausted? – I’m just glad this semester is coming to an end in a month or so.” 

Soobin nods as he follows you over to the countertop, setting the plates down on it. “Fairs, you work hard.” He grins, “But it’s paying off well! Just imagine when you get your degree.” You hum as you pick up a plate and run it under the faucet, “You’re right.” One thing about Soobin was that he always seemed to get your mind off of things, whether it be school or work, or even Beomgyu.. His abilities to see things on the bright side seemed to lighten your own mood tenfold. 

He leans against the countertop, his arms folded across his chest as he watches you clean the dirty plates. “Got any plans for summer?” He asks and you purse your lips as you pick up a sponge and drench it in dish soap. “Dunno… I’ll probably pick up a few extra shifts around here, so don’t think you’ll see less of me.” You send him a small smile before your attention returns to the dishes in front of you. 

Soobin chuckles as he runs a hand through his dark hair. “I wouldn’t want it any other way”, he mumbles. “My parents love you”, he then adds, and you feel heat rushing to your cheeks at the sudden compliment. “I’m sure they’re more than thrilled to have you here all summer.. Just don’t forget to take some time for yourself as well”, he then adds. 

You raise a brow as you shoot him a side glance. “Are you trying to rid yourself of me?” you tease, expecting nothing more but a laugh in return. Soobin however, shakes his head. “Certainly not”, he says as he takes the now clean plate from your hands in order to dry it. — “On the contrary”, he clears his throat, “I was going to ask if you could somehow fit me somewhere in your hectic calendar.” 

Your hand misses the glass you were aiming for and instead your fingers fumble against the bubbles that had formed due to the soap as you blink up at him. Sure you and Soobin spent a great deal of time together, and you considered him a good friend, but that was all thanks to your job at his parent’s restaurant. You never saw each other outside, yet here he was openly asking for such a fact to change? 

He’s quick to note your hesitation and hurriedly adds, “Only if you’re up for it of course!” He clears his throat, scratching the back of his neck sheepishly. “Me and a couple of friends are renting this place not far from the city, I would love for you to join us..” — You watch as he fiddles with the cloth in his hands, anxiously awaiting his response. 

You hadn’t thought of Soobin much that way, but as you regard the soft tint to his cheeks, the way his gaze flickers between the floor and you nervously, you can’t help but find him cute. “I would like that a lot”, you send him an equally shy smile and Soobin’s face immediately lights up. 

He looks like he’s about to say something else but before he gets the chance to, a hoarse voice breaks the silence. “Young man!” You immediately recognize it as none other than your own boss. Soobin cowers behind you as the elderly lady approaches the two of you with rapid steps. Though his attempts at seeking refuge prove futile as she grabs ahold of his ear, yanking down on it hard. 

“What do you think you’re doing? Waltzing in here and distracting my best employee from her duties!” Her harsh tone makes your eyes widen and you almost drop the plate still in your grasp. Soobin winces as he puts his hands up in surrender, “Mom, please! We were just..” — “Just what?” She retorts as she gives his ear another pull. 

Baffled, you bite back a smile, “It’s no trouble Mrs Choi. He’s been helping me out with the dishes.” Your attempt at soothing her fragile nerves seemed successful as the old woman let go of her son and straightened her back, even then, she just barely reached your chest. 

“Hmpf, as long as he makes use of himself I suppose..” She mutters as she sends Soobin a glare, one he returns with a frown as he cradles his ear. — “But I don’t even work her-” He cuts himself short with a small cough when his mom raises a threatening fist his way, “Alright! Alright!” 

Mrs Choi turns her attention to you as she flattens out the apron over her legs. “Very well. Are you staying for dinner, dear?” She asks, her once bitter expression replaced with a warm one. You quickly nod before politely accepting her offer, “I would be delighted to.” 

Your throat burns as you down your third shot of the night. Upon setting the empty glass down, you lean against the bar top as your eyes wander across the crowded dance floor. People were pushed up against one another, their bodies moving uncoordinatedly yet somehow beautifully. — “You wanna dance?” Kayla asks as she sets her own empty shot glass down. 

True to her word, she had stuck by you the entire night, the main reason being the fact that she had yet to scour out a worthy candidate to accompany her home. Still, you couldn’t deny the sense of comfort her chaotic presence brought your tense nerves. “Sure”, you grin as you allow her to take your hand in hers.

The floor moves in rhythm with the beat, your knees feel wobbly but you manage to remain standing through it all. Even as Kayla twirls you in her arms, just barely catching you again as she giggles. Some songs are familiar, others aren't, that didn’t matter much. You found yourself having a lot more fun than you had originally anticipated. And as the night went on the guilt you had been carrying seemed to lessen. 

Perhaps this had been just what you needed, an escape from your otherwise mundane reality. The one where you waited on someone to call, like a lost puppy astray without its owner. Only that someone hardly seemed to care for your longing touch. 

Beomgyu was always on your mind, so much so that sometimes you thought you saw him in other people. In class, at work, even on your way home, you thought you could catch a glimpse of him through the corner of your eye. But as you turned around, you found yourself disappointed yet again. 

So when you’d seen his dark shadow moving across the outskirts of the dancefloor you had brushed it off as another trick of your mind, nothing but the alcohol and your insatiable need for him speaking. But then as Kayla twirls you around once more and your gaze falls on his figure, leaning against the wall, you knew that this wasn’t another of your hallucinations. 

It was undeniably him. Dressed in all black, he nearly blended with the dark wall behind him. The moment is over before you can as much as blink and then you’re back in Kayla’s arms. But for that short second you could’ve sworn that your eyes had met. Your heart nearly stopped. — He quickly disappears from your line of sight as the crowd around you presses closer and you helplessly search from you, completely forgetting about Kayla who was watching you with a frown. 

Fate was cruel. It seemed to know exactly when you craved him the most. Then it would taunt you by flaunting him before your very eyes, close enough to just barely send your mind spiraling, but far enough to remain out of reach for your desperate hands. 

Then, your eyes fall on her. She looks no different from the women he’d been surrounded by that night, the night when you had first met. Her smile is deceiving, her nails sharp as they trail his chest. He leans closer, an arm snaking around her waist, dark hair tickling her face when goes to whisper something in her ear. You can’t hear her laugh but you can see it. And it fucking hurts. 

The rings on his fingers glint under the flashing lights as they brush against her naked thigh, inching closer to where her short skirt ends. He was… You turn your head away in disgust, swallowing the lump in your throat when your gaze meets Kayla’s. 

Your hand is sweaty as you grab hers, and before you know it you’re pulling her along as you push your way through the crowded dance floor. Her protests go over your head, and your grip only grows harsher when she tries to break free. It felt as though you were walking through quicksand. You were sinking faster than you were running. 

It’s not until the cold night air hits your scorching hot face that you finally let her go. The back door slams shut behind you, the sound echoing off the vacant alleway. “What’s gotten into you?” Kayla shrieks as she jerks her hand back, cradling her wrist to her chest with a deep frown on her face. — You don’t answer her as you allow your body to slump against the rough brick wall. 

You breathe in through your nose, letting the fresh air fill your lungs as you trap it there. When you exhale through parted lips you let your eyes flutter closed. “Just needed some air”, you murmur. 

Kayla huffs, sounding deflated as she, too, leans against the side of the building. “You okay?” She whispers, this time her voice is laced with concern. You can feel her gaze on you as she studies your absent expression. “Yes”, you nod. — She pauses, “Do you want to get out of here?” 

You shake your head. “No, I’ll be fine.” You’d be damned to let something as simple as this ruin your night out. Except, Beomgyu was anything but simple. The thought of leaving was tempting, but you told yourself that you had run away for the last time. This wouldn’t change anything. 

“Go on back inside, I’ll join you in a few.” Cracking an eye open, you give your find a reassuring smile. And though she seems far from convinced she nods. “Text me if you change your mind”, Kayla says as he places a quick kiss to your cheek. 

You wait until the door closes behind her before resting your head against the hard brick. Taking the quiet moment to glance around the desolate alley, you find nothing but overcrowded trash cans and empty beer bottles littering the streets. You were all alone, at last. — With a content exhale you close your eyes, basking in the comforting silence that had enveloped you. 

Perhaps it had been rather childish to make such a dramatic exit, but in that very moment, it had been your only escape. You hadn’t seen him like that since.. Since you first met. And after almost two weeks of not seeing one another once, he seemed to be doing just fine, acting as though the whole world laid at his feet. — All the while you struggled to even go a day without him, desperately waiting on a single text in his name. God, when did you allow yourself to stoop to such a level. 

Why was it so easy for him? It was all games and fun in his world. Why could you not share his carefree ways? Why did you have to be the only one suffering from a seemingly pleasure filled agreement? It was unfair. 

Was he not as addicted to you as you were to him? 

Fine. It didn’t matter, nothing mattered anymore. He was off doing god knows what with that chick and you were… here. No, not anymore. You inhale, preparing to put on the strongest of fronts and go back inside. — But before you’re able to let said breath go, the door next to you opens. 

You remain still, completely unmoving as you wait for whoever has come to pass again. They never do. And soon you feel another warm body join you as they, too, lean against the cold brick wall. Everything is quiet, everything is still, time is frozen. 

Carefully you listen as they shuffle about, likely rummaging through their pockets in search of something. Then a click, the one a lighter makes. The smell of thick black smoke hits you not long after and you nearly turn your nose up in disgust. — Next to you, the person exhales, a long and heavy breath. 

“Not even a hello?” 

Beomgyu’s relaxed voice sends a chill down your spine and your eyes snap open. You had known that it was him from the moment he’d stepped outside. Still, you had allowed yourself to blissfully ignore his presence until he decided to make it known. — You keep your eyes on the messy graffiti covering the brick wall opposite you. Following the scribbly lines, you draw in a short breath. “I didn’t think it would be appropriate to.” 

Through the corner of your eye you could see him bring a cigarette to his lips. The end lights up when he inhales slowly, his hand returning to his side once more. He exhales the thick smoke, almost as poisonous as himself. “No?” He hums and even though you refuse to turn his way you can still feel his piercing gaze on you. 

“No.” You firmly agree as you fold your arms across your chest. “You looked… Busy.” With the subtle clearing of your throat you avoid directly targeting the fact that he’d had both eyes and hands on another woman just moments prior. 

But your vague answers didn’t discourage him in the slightest as Beomgyu scoffs. “Does that matter to you?” He asks the question as if you were the one in the wrong, making you out to be a fool for thinking otherwise. You bite your lip, your arms pulling tighter around yourself as you keep your gaze set ahead. 

“Why wouldn’t it?” 

You were being truthful, as honest as you could be. It took everything in you to lay your insecurities bare, and even then you were unable to hide the jealous sting in your voice. The thought of that woman, of all the others.. It made your face twist into a scowl without you even registering it, making your chest contract and your stomach hurt. 

And while Beomgyu had made it clear that what you had was purely sexual, you couldn’t help but find yourself doubting his actions. Things just didn’t add up. He treated you so differently, yet like nothing at all. — Why did it bother you so much that he could so easily venture off with another woman whilst you struggled to even think of a man that wasn’t him. 

Beomgyu hums, the sound low and eerily calm as he takes another drag of his cigarette. “And if I wasn’t busy?” He asks as he twirls the cigarette between his fingers. His questions leaves you unprepared, catching you completely off guard and you purse your lips as your gaze drops to the pavement in front of you. 

Would you have approached him if he was by himself? Would you have asked him to dance, would you have let his hands wander in front of everyone? Perhaps you would’ve asked him to take you somewhere private, maybe you wouldn’t have had to ask at all. 

“I don’t know.” You finally state as you turn your head in his direction, getting your first proper look at him that night. His head is tilted down, causing his dark hair to shield his expression from your curious eyes. Though you could tell that his attention was fixed to the cigarette between his fingers. His lips were slightly parted, his tongue swiping across his bottom one absentmindedly. 

“It’s hard to know when you’re available..” You quietly add and Beomgyu’s eyes flicker toward you. Feeling yourself tense up under his gaze, you shift against the wall as you avoid making direct eye contact. 

“If I was available right now?” He holds out the cigarette for you to take. Eyeing it with disdain for a moment, you decline by shaking your head, “I don’t smoke.” — Beomgyu cocks an eyebrow at you, “You’d be the first to decline.” He studies you for a moment, the corner of his lip twitching into a faint smirk. “But you’re the first of many things, dollface”, he says as he brings the cigarette to his lips. 

You regard his relaxed posture with a frown. First of what? Sometimes it felt as though you and Beomgyu were playing an endless maze-like game, where every twist and turn led you into further confusion, forging new paths that didn’t make half as much sense as the previous one had. He, on the other hand, seemed to be holding all the cards, and you just aimlessly wandered. 

The brief conversation only served to frustrate you further and with a small sigh you push yourself off the wall as you make a move to go around him and back inside. But as your fingers brush the cool handle of the door, his hand suddenly wraps around your wrist, effectively freezing you in place. 

Confused, you try to pull away from his harsh grip. “Don’t you have someone waiting for you in there?” You retort, unable to hide the snappy tone you used. — Beomgyu drops the cigarette, crushing it under the sole of his shoe before shoving you back against the brick wall, easily pinning you against it. 

“No.” He simply states as his dark eyes rake over your stunned expression and down to your skimpily dressed figure. “Told you I was available right now, didn’t I?” He drawls, his hot breath mere inches from your already heated face. 

“But what if I’m not available?” You counter, only to watch the once faint smirk on his lips widen tenfold. “You wouldn’t have ran out here if you were.” Fuck, so he did see you. You’re certain that he can feel the warmth on your face when his thumb brushes over your cheek, threatening to ruin your neat makeup. 

“Fuck, do you always look this dolled up? Even when it’s not for me?” He murmurs, a small almost unnoticeable frown tugging on his brows. His gaze drops to your lips, coated in a shiny gloss. — His mouth is on yours before you can even think, much less form a coherent response. He wastes no time as his rough hands cup your face, pulling you impossibly close only to push his tongue inside your waiting mouth. 

You gasp against his lips, eyes wide as your hands frantically push at his chest. “Wait! Not here- What if someone sees?” 

Beomgyu chuckles, a low and raspy laugh that vibrates on your tongue. His hands leave your face, eagerly descending down your chest, brushing over your already hardened nipples, concealed only by the thin fabric of your dress. — You let out a startled yelp when the cold metal of his rings make contact with the back of your thighs as Beomgyu hikes your legs around his waist; his lips moving down your jaw as he presses hungry kisses to your skin. 

His urgent and almost feverish demeanor confused you. He could go weeks without as much as asking to see you, but when he did it was like he’d been starved of you for years. It didn’t make sense. However you find yourself both unable and unwilling to question his strange behaviour further when his hands suddenly push your already short dress up above your hips. 

“Beomgyu I’m serious!” You whine, yet you find yourself pulling him closer, your nails digging into his shoulders. No matter how hesitant the public display made you feel, you were unable to hold back from satiating the craving you’d been trying to feed for so long.

He scoffs when he sees you throw an anxious glance down the empty alley, your gaze lingering by the door he’d emerged from not long ago. “C’mon dollface, don’t go shy on me now”, he taunts against your neck before pulling your skin between his teeth, making you cry out. 

Fuck it. At least he was here with you and not the woman he’d been feeling up not even an hour prior. You were all that mattered to him. Right? That’s why he’d gone after you, only you. It’s what you tell yourself, it’s the only truth you’re willing to swallow, the only thing that would make you feel better about this. Knowing that you were special. 

Your eager hands move along his shoulders, past his neck and through his dark hair as you yank his face back up to yours, reconnecting your lips in a feverish kiss. You can feel his smirk, stretching wide across his lips when you push your tongue inside his mouth, not bothering to care for the taste of smoke that still lingered there. Pleasantly surprised by your demanding ministrations, Beomgyu lets you pull his bottom lip between your teeth, groaning when you bite down. 

His expression is smug when you pull back for air, his fingers slipping beneath your panties to drag across your throbbing cunt. — Your cunt that had craved him almost as much as your restless mind. 

“Why haven’t you texted me?” Your voice is unstable and threatens to betray you when he pushes two fingers inside of you, almost immediately curling them as he makes your back arch off the wall. Beomgyu’s lips return to your neck as he kisses his way to the shell of your ears. “Don’t be greedy, dollface”, he murmurs as he sucks your lobe into his mouth, rolling the silver of your earring against his tongue. “You already have so much.” 

But it wasn’t enough. 

You frown, wanting to object but quickly losing all your composure when the tip of his cock prods against your aching cunt. Your head hits the brick behind you as Beomgyu eases himself inside of you, a muffled groan passing his lips. — With an anxious gulp you glance toward the door, eyeing it nervously. 

Setting a quick and rough pace, Beomgyu’s fingers clasp around your face, digging into your cheeks as he shifts your attention back to him. “If they see, they see”, he grunts as his hips snap against yours. Meekly nodding, your hands fall back onto his shoulders as your moans fill the empty alleway. Even if no one saw you, they were bound to hear you. For some reason that thought thrilled you more than you ever imagined it would. 

The thought of everyone knowing what he was doing to you. That he was doing it to you and no one else. Only you. 

You knew that your attachment to him was becoming increasingly worrying. You should have probably distanced yourself a long time ago. Because you knew that this wasn’t just about the sex for you. Everything about Beomgyu drew you in. He was intoxicating, almost like a drug. That’s what made him so difficult to leave. Once you tried him, everything else seemed bland. Most of all, you could never seem to get enough of him, for he always left you craving more. 

And you would do anything to get him. 

Even now, as you smell the perfume of that woman all over him, you still crave him. All you can think about is him, all you can breathe is him and all you need is him. 

“Have you fucked her?” The question slips before you can stop it. Your nails claw at his shoulders, pulling a strained groan from him. You didn’t care if he had, not anymore. All that mattered was the fact that he was here with you right now. You desperately told yourself that his answer wouldn’t matter, that you could take it. 

“No.” 

Wait, he didn’t? Your jaw falls open, completely ignorant of the fact that his cock was still buried deep inside of you as your mind spiraled. A smug feeling bloomed within your chest, and it should have been a worrying one, but you could only relish in the fact that he had chosen you over her. He’d chosen you over all of them. You were special, right? 

When he finishes inside of you is when you’re certain that you are. You moan at the feeling of being filled to the brim with everything that was Beomgyu; letting him shove his fingers inside your sore cunt as he pushes his cum back inside, mixing it with your own orgasm before he brings his drenched fingers to your face. 

Your lips part as he smears the mess all over them, glancing up at him with a dazed and almost blissful expression. — “You really are a doll, aren’t you?” He murmurs as he watches your tongue dart out ti swipe across your wet lips, a small groan being pulled from his throat. 

If spending almost two weeks desperately longing for him was what it would take for something like this to happen, you would do it all over again, for as many times as you would have to. Because that’s what addiction was like. And oh how you were addicted to Choi Beomgyu.

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[beomiracles]

No cz to be literally owned by beomgyu—with his mean and toxic behavior, a true manipulator, weaponizing his face and words (and touch)

Nevermind. That is just criminal conscience beomgyu.

THE LAST PARAGRAPH HAD ME SNORTING. you're not wrong. this might be darker than cc beomgyu though..

tw, dub-con, nonconsensual bondage, edging, pussy slapping, penetrative sex, degrading, use of bitch/whore, mc wears a collar, beomgyu quite literally owns you, forced dieting (as punishment)

DARK CONTENT, DONT LIKE DONT READ <3

oh but to be owned by Choi Beomgyu. to have him fully control your life, down to the very meals you eat. why should you have to make as much as a single decision when he's there to do so for you?

"stupid bitch", he would mutter as he shoves your face in the pillows, hands digging into your ass as he rams himself inside of you with a force that bordered on painful. ― "can't even think for yourself, brain's all mush, only thinking about cock all day, you fucking whore."

he takes you wherever he wants, whenever he wants. sometimes he'll let you know in advance, allowing you to prep yourself, others he takes you by surprise. ― but you're always ready to for him, that's your only duty after all. everything he does for you, everything he give you. the least you can do is bend over nicely when asks, even though he usually doesn't.

you're not allowed to touch yourself when he isn't home, your body isn't yours but his. ― doesn't matter if you nearly tear yourself in half trying to please him, he will find wrongs, he will fault you for them, using the excuse to punish you.

wether it be cutting back meals, leaving you tied to the bed or the sofa for hours on end. or just edging you until you cry, making you cum only to deliver a harsh slap against your cunt for disobeying him once again. ― "didn't say you could cum did I? but you just love to be punished don't you? filthy bitch."

he buys you a collar, it does't have your name on it, but his. because you were't your own self, you were his, his only. his property, and he would make sure to flaunt it.

[beomiracles]

𝓞𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝓤𝐏𝐎𝐍 𝓐 𝓓𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐌

𝓓𝓐𝐘𝓓𝐑𝓔𝓐𝐌𝓔𝐑 ; definition ❝someone who spends a great deal of time in their head and getting lost there, for they have an universe inside of them❞

⸝⸝ 𝓣𝐡𝐞 𝓑𝐞𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐫'𝐬 𝓖𝐮𝐢𝐝𝐞 ⸝⸝

𝓓𝐑𝓔𝓐𝐌𝓒𝓐𝐓𝓒𝓗𝓔𝐑 𝓣𝐎 𝓓𝓡𝐄𝓐𝓜 𝓙𝓞𝓤𝐑𝓝𝐀𝓛 𝓓𝐈𝓐𝐑𝓨

special event; 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐕𝐄𝐈𝐋𝐒 𝐎𝐅 𝐀𝐄𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐀

© all rights reserved @/beomiracles 2024-2025 ─ do not copy/translate/repost my works without my given consent. note that all works are purely fictional and do not represent the idols in real life

[beomiracles]

𝐂𝐑𝐈𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐀𝐋 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐒𝐂𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 TAPE 03

𝓓𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐌 𝓔𝐍𝐓𝐑𝐘 ⸝⸝ Moving rapidly through your career as one of the leading female investigators, you never once encountered a case you couldn't crack. Though you never expected for your past mistakes to come back and haunt you in the form of an ex lover, accused of murder. ⸝⸝

𝓹airings criminal!beomgyu x detective!reader 𝔀arnings attempted SA, mentions of substance abuse, oral (f.rec), blood, violence, hm... that's all.

📼 THE TAPE RECORDINGS

𝓣𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝓢𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐘 contains dark themes portraying unhealthy and toxic relationships and substance abuse. reader discretion is advised ! — this story is partly told in flashbacks, beware of timestamps as past/present are mixed throughout the story.

#serene adds ✎.. whew, I basically wrote all of this today, and the beginning I wrote yesterday.. I've had a busy week to say the least, and an even busier one next alongside my birthday... I just want to go to sleep for a very long time honestly.. >-<

[ ▶︎ •၊၊||၊|။| TAPE 03 ] — To Know Is Not To Love — recording legnth: 6k

📼 — April 18th 2022 

Beomgyu’s car was just like you had imagined it. A sleek black model with tinted windows and dark leather seats. It ran far smoother than your old passed down Volvo and as Beomgyu swiftly maneuvers through the busy streets, you lean back against the cool leather. — The silence weighing over your was thick, and awkwardly so. 

You had no idea why he had so suddenly appeared, why he had insisted on you coming with him or even where he was taking you. Through the corner of your eye you watch as his fingers drum against the wheel almost rhythmically. His dark gaze is on the road, his thoughts seemingly occupied by something else. You wanted to ask what, but you didn’t. 

“Where are we going?” 

That was a much safer question. You shift in the passenger seat, your eyes daring a quick peek his way before immediately returning to your feet on the floor. One of his hands leaves the wheel in order to push his hair back, “Where was your friend taking you?” His voice is casual, as if the situation didn’t bother him in the slightest. 

“O-Oh, she was just taking me home, I didn’t have my car with me so…” You trail off as you pick at your cuticles, tongue prodding against the inside of your cheek nervously. With his now free hand, Beomgyu swipes a finger across the ipad-like screen on the dashboard. The device flashes once before showing a small GPS. — He motions for you to type your address in. 

“Where’s your car?” He then asks, startling you and making your finger skid across the screen. “I uh…At home”, you cough, quickly finishing up on the dashboard before leaning back once more. The GPS calculates a suitable route and Beomgyu casts a brief glance in its direction. “Why?” He wonders and you frown. Did he always pry this much into other people's lives? 

Yet you found yourself wanting to tell him, wanting to be honest with him. 

“One of my classmates gave me a ride”, you explain as you fiddle with the hem of your bag, placed neatly on the floor between your legs. Beomgyu hums next to you as his fingers resume their persistent drum against the steering wheel. — “Do you like your classmates?” His question catches you off guard, the whole ordeal had started to feel like an interrogation, and you were his prime suspect. 

You shrug, “Does it matter?” — “Why wouldn’t it?” He quickly counters and you feel your face drop. He couldn’t honestly expect you to provide an answer to that, could he? What was it to him anyway? It wasn’t like he ever saw you for anything besides sex. — “They’re okay I guess.” You slowly say, as if convincing yourself of the answer as you were giving it. 

“Just okay?” He hums, his lip twitching into something akin to a grin. Beomgyu was difficult to make conversation with. You never knew how to answer the questions he threw at you — In turn you never knew how to counter said questions with ones of your own. For while he seemed to take little shame in dwelling deep into the details of your life, he often dismissed indulging in any personal information regarding himself. 

It made you wonder what kind of strange fascination he held for you. Why did he keep you around, why did he care about such mundane things? Was there something more behind all the occasions in which he’d asked to see you, was there a reason he had picked you up today. And why were you not made aware of his intentions? 

The feeling of cold metal rings against your warm skin startles you from your thoughts. You glance down only to find Beomgyu’s hand on your knee, fingers snaking between your legs as the pads of his fingers brush along your inner thigh. — “Music?” He asks and you quietly hum in agreement. He nods toward the small screen on the dashboard, “Pick something good yeah?” 

Pulling your bottom lip between your teeth as your fingers swipe across the many artists displayed. “Do you like BTS?” Throwing a quick glance his way, you find Beomgyu’s expression just as unreadable as it was on any other day. It was impossible to tell whether he was enjoying something or not. But he gives a small huff, his hand squeezing the flesh of your thigh, “That boy band?” 

You nod, finger hovering over the play button. It wasn’t like you were embarrassed or anything.. But when in the presence of Beomgyu you somehow felt the need to please him in any way you could. Even if that meant changing minor details about yourself in the process. 

He quirks a brow in the direction of your hand before shrugging, “Sure why not.” 

The rest of the car ride is spent mostly in silence, save for the occasional interrogating questions fired by Beomgyu as his fingers trace your inner thigh. 

At last, after twenty long minutes the car comes to a stop outside of your apartment complex. Finally feeling some sort of relief you step out of the car, only to frown when Beomgyu does the same. “Wait, why are you getting out?” The question slips past your unguarded lips and Beomgyu raises a brow as he shoves his hands into his pockets. “I’ll see where you live.”  It was a statement not a question — And with those exact words he marched inside the building. 

It takes you two tries to get your rattling keys into the keyhole and you swallow a gulp as the door to your small flat swings open. The space was tiny and the building rather old, but you had decorated the place to the best of your abilities — It served a great temporary home for you, oh and for…meeeow~ 

Your furry roommate gazes up at you with an expectant look as her tail pads against the floor behind her. You give an awkward smile as you reach down to pet her. “This is Nala”, you say as you give the feline a few scratches. “She’s not very fond of new people so…” Your words fall short as Nala trots over to where Beomgyu stands in the doorway, immediately brushing against his leg lovingly as she purrs. “Or not..” You mumble sheepishly. 

Leaning down to give the feline a few pats, Nala purrs in response to the action and Beomgyu smirks, “Cute little thing you are.” It felt strange, seeing Beomgyu so affectionate towards anything really. Silently you watch as his ring covered fingers stretch across Nala’s light fur, his rough hands a stark contrast to her softness. A strange feeling blooms within your chest, one you can’t quite place.

“I didn’t take you for a cat person.” Your comment makes him raise a brow, “No?” — You shake your head, “Dogs seem more fitting.” 

Beomgyu remains silent, his dark gaze fixed on Nala but he looks to be considering your words. A moment later he lets go of your cat as he straightens back up. “I like dogs”, he shrugs as a small smirk etches its way onto his lips. Then he takes a step in your direction and suddenly your already tight hallway feels suffocating. “Dogs are loyal, pliant even”, he continues, his voice a low drawl. When he finishes he’s merely inches from you, caging you against the wall without as much as even touching you. — From this close the pungent smell of his cologne invades your senses, it’s a familiar and intoxicating scent. He smelled almost minty, refreshing, like the blow of wind on a cold winter day. 

Blinking a few times, your eyes regain focus as they meet his dark ones. “Dogs are predictable”, his smirk widens, “Cats aren’t.” You would admit that you failed to make a connection between the two. Sometimes, if not always, it felt as though the two of you were speaking completely different languages. You could never tell if he was mocking you or not. 

“You’re right”, he then says, “I don’t like cats.” Though he quickly casts a glance in the direction of Nala who was busy cleaning herself as she sat by the shoe rack. His eyes seem to narrow, if only briefly before turning back to you. “I like her”, he then states and you frown, “Nala?” Beomgyu gives a small twitch of his lip, like you were asking him just the right questions.

“You need to earn a cat's trust.” He pauses, “Usually that’s not something I bother with.” His voice is low and you can feel his warm breath against your face as you struggle for air. He exhales, his warm breath hitting you across the face. — “Perhaps with this one I will.” 

His gaze visibly darkens, a glimmer of knowing swirling within his irises. You were starting to wonder if Nala was even the topic of your conversation, for his words seemed very metaphorical. 

You nearly jump when his hand brushes against your chin, the touch so light it could’ve been mistaken for the wind. “Go get yourself dolled up”, he murmurs, his attention fixed to your slightly parted lips, as if studying their very shape. — Your brows pull together in a confused frown, an unspoken question waiting on your tongue, one that Beomgyu quickly beats you to. 

“I’m taking you out, dollface.” 

⸝⸝

📼 — PRESENT TIME ; February 20th 2024

“Alright, I’ve refrained from prying, but you need to start giving me answers.” Yeonjun’s voice is stern, reminding you of how he was when you were still in training. He leaves no room for objections as he leans against the desk opposite you, the sleeves of his shirt rolled up over his arms as he folds them across his chest. The concerned look on his face tells you everything you need to know. 

Your gaze drops to the glass of water clutched tightly in your trembling hands. You had embarrassed yourself at the crime scene, you knew that much. Barely lasting ten minutes inside that suffocating bathroom before you had darted out the front door, your hands clasped over your mouth before emptying your guts into the nearest bush. 

Getting sick when walking through places like that, it wasn’t uncommon. But the tears that had followed were, and you knew exactly why your senior had pulled you aside the second you got back to office. — “You told me you could handle it…” 

“I can!” You quickly object, your head jerking up as you shoot him an alarmed look. — “Then what was that back there? Because it was far from professional”, he states, sounding disappointed. The harsh truth went straight to your chest. 

You bite your lip, stopping yourself from blurting out whatever was on your mind, you knew that it would only worsen your already fragile situation. But you wanted to tell him, god you had been wanting to tell anyone for the past ten months. Yet whenever an opportunity presented itself, you found yourself unable to. Suppose you didn’t know how to. 

The sound of your finger anxiously tapping against the glass fills your small office. Yeonjun heaves a sigh, his arms flexing as he adjusts himself on the desk. “Look, you’re obviously not ready for this, especially not given your prior connection to him. — So let’s just call it quits and get someone else on the case, I won’t make a note of it.” 

He groans when you immediately shake your head, still refusing to meet his gaze. You knew you were being difficult, that being on this case only did more harm than good to everyone around. Still, you couldn’t let this go to someone else. You had to do this. Why? Perhaps it all had to do with the fucked up part of you that thought you knew Beomgyu, that you could actually see and read him in ways others couldn’t. 

You almost snort at the thought, what a complete and utter lie. For the year spent in his presence, for the year he tortured your mind, you hadn’t once been able to enter his. You don’t think you ever would. No one would. He wasn’t meant to be understood, to be figured out. Yeonjun would never understand that, nor would any other of your colleagues. That’s why you had to do this. 

It was clear that your senior cared for you, that he was trying to put your well being before anything else. You appreciated his concern, but this was different. — When you finally lift your gaze to look at him, your eyes are filled to the brim with fresh tears, waiting to cascade down your cheeks a second time that day. “I have to do this.” 

The stern expression on Yeonjun’s face quickly falls as he hears your broken whisper. The pity radiating off of him made you sick, he should not pity you, for you had brought this onto yourself. You had no one but yourself to blame for the way things turned out. 

With a shaky exhale you take a small sip of your water. “If I don’t… Then it’ll never be okay again.” You nod, more to yourself than to him, a sense of determination filling you. This was the closure you needed. To complete the case and write Beomgyu out of your life once and for all, that was what you needed to do. All of this, they were just old feelings resurfacing, nothing you hadn’t felt before and therefore nothing you wouldn’t be able to deal with. 

Yeonjun sighs as he pushes himself off the desk. “Alright”, he reluctantly agrees, “But you’ll be working alongside me, I don’t want you alone with him.” — That was okay, you could work with that. You nod, giving him a thankful smile, “Okay.”  

⸝⸝

📼 — April 18th 2022 

The restaurant Beomgyu had taken you to was dark, awfully so. From the crimson tablecloths covering the rounded tables, to the dimly lit candles that casted the room in a warm yet eerie glow. The place itself was situated on a lonely street, far away from all civilization, yet the diner was filled with people. 

Conversation flows around you, the topics ranging from the most dull events of everyone’s day. They're well dressed, almost over the top. Some are wearing gowns paired with expensive looking jewelry that dangle from their necks, others are wearing velvety suits and heavy watches around their wrists. — Glancing down to your own simple red dress, you suddenly feel underdressed for the occasion. 

Beomgyu on the other hand hasn’t even bothered with switching out what seemed to be his day to day attire. His white shirt becomes almost yellow in the gloomy light, its sleeves rolled up over his arms. The tie around his neck hangs loosely, like someone had pulled on it, hard. Though he’d rid himself of the black coat he usually wore on top. 

He looked handsome, undeniably so. And he didn’t seem at all bothered by the multiple glances your table was receiving. There was something lingering in the air, like a distinct and almost familiar smell, but one you couldn’t place no matter how hard you tried. — It was similar to that of the club he had taken you to on your second encounter, the one where you had met Duri. 

Wordlessly the entire room seemed to be watching you, their eyes weighed tons on your naked shoulders, as if you were put under a spotlight. But when you turn your head, you find their attention elsewhere. Were you imagining things? Whatever it was it seemed to cling to him, for everyone seemed to know who he was. Yet as you sit in front of him, you suddenly feel like you were the only one in the room who didn’t. 

“You look wonderful, dollface.” 

Beomgyu’s compliment radiates throughout your body, making your heartbeat quicken and warmth seep to your face. His dark eyes linger on the red dress, a small smirk tugging at the corner of his lips. — You smile, a wave of shyness washing over you as your gaze drops to your hands placed neatly in your lap, “Thank you.” 

It didn’t matter that you might be the only one made unaware of his real intentions, of who he really was. Why should it matter when he was here with you, not them? Was it selfish to want him all to yourself, that the persistent glances of others made your blood boil and your brows furrow? Maybe. 

Your waitress was no better. She had been quick to bat her dramatically long eyelashes at him, to pout her lips and bite on her pen as Beomgyu ordered. She would double check and then check again to make sure she had gotten it right, almost tripping over her own two feet as she leaned forward to “hear him better.” What a load of bullshit. 

She had noticed your scowl the second she had turned to you, her own face adapting a similar look as she heaved a sigh before taking your order. — Beomgyu didn’t seem to notice her advances, and if he didn’t he simply didn’t seem to care. 

You told yourself that it was a good thing, that it meant he only cared for your affections. It had to mean something right? Going out like this, to a restaurant no less. That had to imply that he was serious about you, right? Hardly did you consider yourself a traditional or even old-fashined woman, but a proper date like this, wasn’t something fuck buddies did. 

The word makes you cringe. Fuck buddies. Was that what you were? Was that all he saw you as, simple and easy sex. No, that couldn’t be, and it wasn’t. At least so you told yourself. In fact you spent a great deal of time thinking about him, about Beomgyu. He occupied your thoughts more than you liked to admit. You found yourself constantly re-thinking and mulling over every word and touch. When you weren’t with him you were thinking of him. He refused to leave your system, no matter how many times you tried to get clean. 

“What’s got you so preoccupied, dollface?” Beomgyu sets his glass down as he studies your distant expression. What could you even say? “They’re all staring at us and I hate it? – Have you fucked everyone in this room or what?” You remain quiet, fiddling with the foot of your own glass as you watch the wine swirl inside. “Well I just…” You begin but quickly trail off as the buzzing vibrations coming from your phone suddenly interrupts your train of thought. 

With a small frown on your face you reach for the device and peer down toward the screen. Beomgyu leans back on his chair, an unbothered expression on his face. He didn’t look like he was expecting an explanation. — “It’s just Kayla… she’s um, asking about lunch..” You give him one anyway. It was hard to know what to tell him, what he wanted to hear and what he didn’t. You knew that you owed him nothing.. So why did you feel the need to give him everything? 

“You’re busy tomorrow, he plainly states and you glance at him with confusion. He then nods toward your phone, “Tell your friend that you’re busy tomorrow.” His words leave much to desire, but as Beomgyu takes another sip of his drink, you knew that you weren’t going to receive any answers. So you shove your phone into the small bag you’d brought along, “Alright, I’ll do that.” 

You felt guilty, for you had been ignoring your friend for weeks now, scared that she would be able to see right through you. But the longer you went without seeing her, the more paranoid you grew. Aside from Kayla and Taehyun… Beomgyu was all you had. As bad as it sounded, it was the painstaking truth. You had grown accustomed to his company, and you craved it even in the presence of others. 

Another waiter comes to clear your empty plates, and as he does, Beomgyu leans over to mutter something in his ear. You can’t pick up on what’s being said, instead you find yourself left with no more distractions. The lingering glances suddenly feel like small needles poking at your skin. They’re now the center of your attention and you feel sweat accumulating on your forehead as you swallow. 

In the midst of your racing thoughts, you fail to notice Beomgyu’s gaze among the crowd. He’s watching you, only you. Dark eyes trying to break you apart as he demands access to your mind. The hum slipping from his lips snaps your attention his way, and you find him looking at you expectantly. —“They’re staring..” You murmur, your eyes flitting between him and the other tables. 

Beomgyu doesn’t spare your audience as much as a glance, his attention remaining fixed to you solely. “You don’t like it.” He says as a matter of factly and you can only nod, whispering out a quiet, “Yes.” You couldn’t understand how he was so comfortable, how he seemed to have such little care for their invading presences. 

Before you can get as much as another word out, he’s rising to his feet, his chair making a scraping noise against the wooden floors. Without thinking twice you scramble to your feet as you hurry after him. — A chill runs down your spine when his hand finds a place on the small of your back, guiding you through what felt like an ocean of eyes. 

He stops by a secluded corner, and when he leans in, his warm breath caresses the side of your face. “Stay here, I’ll pay.” The gentle kiss he presses to your cheek makes your eyes widen, and you can only hope he doesn’t notice. — That was certainly not something fuck buddies did. 

When he steps away the heavy weight of their attention on you disappears. But it’s not gone, it’s just following him instead, following him everywhere he goes. — The dim light of your corner shields you, it puts you at ease and you lean back against the will as you exhale a sigh of relief. Maybe Kayla had been wrong about him, after all she didn’t know him, not like you did. 

You tried to figure out why he had taken you here tonight, why he’d bothered to show off like this rather than bringing you an empty hotel room. But he hadn’t let on to as much as a single thing. None of his interrogating questions from earlier lingered, if anything, it seemed his only intention was to spend time with you. 

A pair of footsteps approach, you can clearly make out the slow drag of their feet. For a second you think he might be back already, but it is not Beomgyu’s voice that interrupts your brief bubble of silence. — “You new around here miss?” It’s raspy, his speech slightly slurred. 

Your eyes snap open and you quickly push yourself off the wall as you eye him warily. “I would be sure to remember a face like yours”, he then says, his gaze lingering on your red dress with a little too much interest. His presence felt even heavier than that of the stares you’d been receiving all evening and you swallow when he takes a step closer. 

He was tall, possibly taller than Beomgyu himself, and older too, at least in his mid thirties. He looked dirty, that was the only way to put it. For reasons unknown he seems persistent in introducing himself. “The name’s Han-jae”, his grimy hand reaches for your own but you quickly withdraw it.

“Ah, I’m fine, thank you. I’m here with someone for tonight..” You quickly scan the room in search of Beomgyu, much to no avail as the man takes a step closer, blocking your very narrow line of sight. He chuckles, the sound deep as his chest heaves. “Oh I bet you are”, he drawls, “It would be pure luck to find you alone.” 

The stench of alcohol fills your nostrils as he cages you against the wall and you scrunch your nose in disgust. His breathing is heavy when he leans down. “But it seems I just did.” A nasty smirk pulls along his chapped lips as he grabs ahold of your wrist, his grip tight and unforgiving. 

Your heart practically leaps out of your chest, the dangers of your current situation finally dawning on you. Where was Beomgyu? You felt utterly helpless like this, lost and frightened as you desperately try to break free. — “I really am here with someone..!” Your pathetic attempts at swaying his interests elsewhere proved useless as the sadistic grin on the man’s lips only widened further. 

“I’m sure you are, doll”, he muses as he with one harsh tug pulls you closer, so close that your chest practically brushes his. When coming face to face with him, you could clearly make out his bloodshot eyes and dilated pupils. Whatever he had taken it made him almost lethal. 

Then, just as you thought he was about to yank you out of this place, to take you to places only god knew where, ring clad fingers suddenly wrapped around his hand on your wrist. You did not know whether to cry or laugh when your terrified eyes finally fell on Beomgyu’s figure. But as you regard the dark expression on his face, the momentary relief suddenly washed off again. 

Despite his intoxicated state the man seems to recognize Beomgyu and the grip on your wrist noticeably falters. “Mr. Choi..” He exclaims, a flash of uncertainty painting his features. Beomgyu lets go of his hand with a small grimace, appearing disgusted with the man before him. Rather than paying him any mind, Beomgyu turns to you as he steps between you and the drunk. 

“You alright, dollface?” He murmurs, his voice carrying a nearly anxious edge. His hand feels strangely soft against your cheek, the cool metal of his rings contrasting your warm skin. You blink, still in disbelief over the brief encounter that had just taken place. With your hand awkwardly cradling your sore wrist, you give a small nod. 

He looks like he’s about to say something else, but before he gets the chance to, the man interrupts once more. “‘S a pretty little thing you’ve got there”, he comments as he points toward you. — Beomgyu’s expression hardens, his hand dropping from your face as he throws a glance over his shoulder, “What?” 

The man grins, that same sickening grin he’d been flashing you mere moments ago. “Almost mistook her for a doll..” He hiccups, the alcohol practically spewing off of him in waves. “Standing all alone, but now I see who she was waiting for.” 

Beomgyu remains silent as he listens to the man speak, regarding him with a scowl on his face. Seemingly oblivious, the man continues to ramble. “But you’ll do me the favor of letting me know when you’re done? — I’ll be happy to pick up wherever you left off–” 

Whack! 

The man’s words are cut to a short when Beomgyu’s fist connects with his jaw, metal rings clashing against his teeth. He stumbles backwards as he awkwardly grabs onto his face with a pained groan. Blood sippers from his open mouth, sliding down his chin as he splutters. If he tried to speak it was to deaf ears because not a single coherent response came from his now bruised lips. 

You glance between him and Beomgyu, who is currently dusting off his hand on his shirt. He seemed far too unbothered by everything, and he doesn’t spare the man a second glance as he turns on his heel and heads for the door. But he wasn’t the only one, for no one seemed to even be as much as peeking in the direction of the bleeding man. 

His pained whines echo throughout the room but no one pays him any mind. Their conversations flow without interruption and suddenly everyone avoided even glancing Beomgyu’s way. 

Too stunned to even speak, you follow him out of the restaurant. You don’t question him when he opens the door to the backseat rather than the passenger one. Nor do you question him when he gets inside along with you, much less when he slides down on the floor between your legs. 

The cool metal of his rings sting your naked skin as his hands caress your thighs. He’s silent, and for a moment you thought that he might be angry with you. But then his eyes lift to meet yours, they’re dark, but in the pale light of night, they seemed to be almost glowing. “Dollface?” His breath is hot against your legs. 

You swallow, the saliva going down your throat agonizingly slow. “Yes?” Your reply is but a mere whisper. 

He sighs, hands sliding under the fabric of your dress. “You need to be careful from now on”, he murmurs and your breath hitches as his fingers trace the lining of your panties. You bite the inside of your cheek as his thumb presses against your clit through the soft cotton. — “There are tons of dangerous men out there”, he places a kiss to your thigh. 

“Men who won’t hesitate to take advantage of you.” His fingers are slipping past your underwear, caressing your already glistening folds. The cold rings against your warm cunt pulls a gasp between your lips. His touch clouds your thoughts, making it impossible to see or think of anything but him. “Who knows what could have happened to you if I hadn’t been there.” 

His fingers hook around the lining of your panties, tugging them down your legs in one swift motion as he lets them pool by your ankles. He pauses, his warm mouth hovering inches from where you ache for him. “Promise me you’ll be careful, dollface.” — You quickly nod, squirming as you silently beg for him to touch you. 

“I need to hear you say it.” He groans as he gives in and lets his tongue drag across your folds, earning a soft cry from you. “Promise me.” He sounds almost pleading, and you find yourself clenching around nothing as you listen to the muffled sounds of him between your legs. Your thighs press against the sides of his face as your back arches off the leather seat, your heavy breaths fogging up the tinted windows of his car. 

“Dollface.” He urges as his fingers dig into your flesh, his rings leaving indents on your skin. — “I will, I’ll be careful. I promise”, you ramble as your fingers card through his dark hair, twisting and pulling at it as you desperately try to press his face even closer. Beomgyu hums, the sound vibrating against you, making you squirm in your seat. 

“That’s what I wanted to hear”, he says before pressing a kiss to your cunt. 

��⸝

📼 — PRESENT TIME ; February 20th 2024

You should have gone home hours ago. In fact Yeonjun had wanted to send you home as soon as you had gotten back from the crime scene. He’d even offered to take you. But you had declined, insisting on doing your hours and leaving once finished. But as noon turned into afternoon, and afternoon into early evening, you found yourself straying by the office. 

By now you had gone through Beomgyu’s files at least a dozen times. Reading and re-reading every written sentence. Search each and every picture for clues. What you hadn’t done was actually think about him. Right now, he was nothing but another subject of interest. You imagined him to be just another of your practice tests, the ones you had done during training. 

He wasn’t real. Beomgyu wasn’t real. 

It worked. You found yourself in peace as you sat by your desk. And for the first time in almost 48-hours, you allowed yourself to dissociate from everything that was happening around you. — So why was it that you found it so hard to leave? To go home and rest in the comforts of your own apartment. 

Something kept you here. And your chest tightened, because you knew exactly what. 

By 7 the office was completely empty. The silence of such a large building seemed to echo, it made your thoughts loud. So you started walking, because moving got your mind off of things, at least so you thought. But as you made your way down the stairs, as you stepped outside and headed for the building that connected to your office, you knew where your feet were taking you. Still, you refused to acknowledge the destination of your journey, choosing to focus on the chilly air and the darkness of the still early evening. 

When your hand pushes the large doors to custody open, you know you can’t pretend anymore. Whatever lie you had been feeding yourself for the past couple of hours was being eaten alive at this very moment. 

You’re presented with long hallways, the walls are all the same clinically white. Fluorescent lights hang above you, guiding you down the endless corridors. You knew where you were going, you even had the number to the door memorized. 

One final turn to your left lands you in an almost vacant part of the building. There were no cameras here, something within your policy stating that even the lowest of human beings deserve privacy, or some shit like that. You supposed said matter would aid you today. 

All rooms here stood empty, all but one. — You don’t know why or how you ended up outside of Beomgyu’s cell. You didn’t want to question it because you were afraid of the answer. 

The white door only allows a small adjustable window in which you could peek through. His room is dark, but you know that he’s there. Did you miss him? Was that why you were here? You were no fool, you knew that he was the reason as to why you had lingered within your office, why you had dreaded going home, because it would mean leaving him once more. 

Why did he still make you feel like this, how did he still hold this much power over you? It wasn’t fair, not in the slightest. — You should turn back, you should be ashamed of yourself for even coming here and for even allowing yourself to think that there was more to be said. 

But you knock. The sound is soft but still manages to echo down the vacant hall. You don’t have to wait long, for a small light is soon flicked on somewhere inside the room. With a trembling hand you undo the hatch to the small window, pulling it aside slowly. 

Beomgyu waits for you on the other side. He doesn’t seem surprised by your sudden appearance. Instead a knowing smirk pulls across his lips, he’d expected you to visit him. He’d probably even betted amongst himself, and you had just given him the satisfaction of victory. — “Dollface”, the familiar name, sends your heart into a minor frenzy. “It’s a little late to be working still.” He lets his head fall to the side, eyeing you with much amusement. 

You swallow, trying to remain stoic despite the effort it took, “Perhaps.” 

He chuckles and you’re once again reminded of how hard he was to read. He said one thing, acted on another, laughed about a third. It was like a never ending maze. Maybe that was what made him so intriguing to you. — “Yet you’re here..” He drawls, his eyes glinting the same way they had when you first met; clearing telling you all the things that were wrong with him, and somehow managing to pull you in all the more. 

“But you shouldn’t be.” His statement is cold, and you know that he’s right. 

You should most definitely not be here right now. You should be anywhere but here, with him. But as your gaze meets his you suddenly realize why you are. Because despite everything a small stubborn and hopeless part of you clings onto the faint hope that he isn’t what you know him to be. 

Because a small part of you wants to believe that Beomgyu is innocent.

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[xylatox]

this was the cutest fic I ever read I swear like??? the concept of Strawberry Land?? Adorable. the fact that a little love is all you need. God, it really is so cute :(💗

𝓟𝐄𝐀𝐂𝐇 𝓒𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐌

𝓓𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐌 𝓔𝐍𝐓𝐑𝐘 ⸝⸝ In Strawberryland, where all the people are happy, and a little fruity; Little Apricot finds herself drawn to the only thing the village seems to resent. — For in a lonesome house by the far end of the valley, where the sun never seems to shine, and the grass never seems to grow, lives a boy who was once as peachy as one could be.

Nowadays, he's grown somewhat of a hermit, and should his sharp glares not be enough, his harsh words certainly will be when he fends off any visitors that may dare come his way. No one knows what happened to the boy. Though one thing was clear; every peach Beomgyu touched quickly turned rotten. ⸝⸝

𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ wc, 16k ་༘࿐

𝓹airings peach!beomgyu x little apricot!reader (f) 𝔀arnings heavy grumpy x sunshine trope, fairytale themed (kinda goes in threes, at least in the beginning), mean beomgyu, naive/gullible reader, longing/yearning, unprotected sex, creampie, little apricots cum is described as a jam-like texture, cum eating, oral (f. rec), overstimulation, beomgyu is fuzzy (cause peach fuzz), lot of kissing, loads of sexual tension..

#serene adds ✎.. hello!! I'm so so excited for this fic you guys seriously have no idea, imagine my current excitement and then bump it up 100x! I've worked so hard on this fic, but most of it felt so natural when I was writing, everything kinda just flowed? I hope that shines through!! ahh, and I can never shut up so here we are at 16k when my target was 7k but oh well.. oh but I would love to hear your thoughts on this!! merry christmas!! consider this my gift :3

THIS FIC IS A PART OF AN EVENT, GET REDIRECTED TO THE EVENTPOST !

The sun rises early in Strawberryland, its warm rays casting the plump little houses in an orange glow. It’s quiet, for the colorful meadow has yet to wake up. The birds are still sleeping soundly, the deers hidden in the treeline as they huddle close to one another. All that can be heard is the soft rippling of clear water as it runs along a small stream. Everyone is asleep, all except for one.  — Little Apricot rises just as the sun, and she does so with excitement. 

Pots and silverware clank together, creating a chaotic atmosphere in your tiny kitchen as you shuffle about. The soft hum of a foreign melody dances across your lips, your hands working diligently as they alter between stirring the jam that was cooking on the stove, and onto unscrewing the lids of the many jars you’d prepared. An outsider would think something big was coming, that this might’ve been a special day indeed. 

And it was. For Little Apricot at least. 

“Thirty-seven, thirty-eight, thirty-nine, forty…” You point to each neatly secured jar, filled to the brim with creamy orange jam. They’re topped with a matching ribbon, tied nicely around the plaid and orange lid. And they’re now all ready to be handed out. — “Forty-nine…” You trail off, gaze lingering by the last jar, “Fifty…” 

With pursed lips, your hands hover above it, debating on whether to shove it in the already full basket alongside the rest. In the end you do. And with your bright orange coat pulled over your body, you step outside, letting the warm sun caress the soft skin of your cheeks, causing a smile to spread across your face. Today was a good day. 

Your steps are light and cherry as you skip down the cobbled road that takes you through Strawberry village. The happy song of the melody you sang rings out into the air, and you only tune it down to a soft hum as you approach the first door of the day. — With a gentle knock, you wait, swinging back and forth on two legs as you balance the heavy basket in your hands. 

The blue door to the little hut swings open and you’re greeted by a mess of hair as bright and blue as the sky itself. Blueberry Kai greets you with a smile, his sapphire like eyes sparkling in the sun as they land on the basket in your hands. “Hi Little Apricot!” He almost sings the words and you refuse a giggle as you coyly avert your gaze. 

“Hi Kai, I brought you one of these..” You reach for one of the jam filled jars, handing the boy it as you await his verdict. — Kai’s smile widens as he takes the jar from you, and it seems small in his large hands. “You’re too good to us Apricot”, he says, though doesn’t refuse your kindness but rather thanks you with the promise of bringing a fresh blueberry pie in the following days. 

You continue like that, happily skipping down the road that looped around the village. And for each house you stopped by, the grin on your lips only grew, as did the warmth on your face and the love that filled your chest. Gradually your basket emptied and got lighter, and once you’d delivered Lemon Drop Soobin his jar, all that remained was one. 

The bright and orange little jar looks lonely as it rocks back and forth by the bottom of your now comically large basket, and with a small frown you glance toward the forest line. “Hmpf”, you huff, shaking your head sharply before turning on your heel and marching toward the dark trees. You had made enough jam for everyone in this village, and you’d make sure to deliver it as well. 

..Suppose you had underestimated the dark and menacing nature of the woods just slightly. But it wasn’t like the forest in Strawberryland was always this…scary, it just so happened to be the part where one individual resided. The youngest of the village speculated that his presence is what caused the nature around him to turn dark, that his vile and evil ways killed everything around him. You didn’t believe such nonsense, yet you found yourself gripping the basket tighter in your hands as you carefully trudged forward. 

You’ve been walking for a good twenty minutes, following a sparse dirt road as you peer through the thick tree trunks, when a small cottage suddenly floats into vision. Your heart beat immediately picks up, thumping loudly against your ribcage as you with hesitant steps approach. — The small hut looks just like the others of the village. Or at least, it used to. 

The white paint on its sides had been dirtied by nature's force, vines climbed the walls and tangled around the windowsills where the peachy paint had chipped. The roof was a round and once warm shade, though now, it looked just as lifeless as the rest of the house. You wondered how anyone could possibly live like this. 

A small wooden sign is shoved into the ground, it is just as battered as the rest of the place and reads the words, “Keep Out!” A flicker of uncertainty passes you by, but you ignore it. It was probably just something he had put up to scare any kids that dared come this way despite their mother’s warnings.

As you heave the steps up his front door, you try to remember what he’d looked like. You don’t think you have seen him for quite some time now. For he only ventured into town when he needed something, and judging by the state of his small cottage, it had been a while. Still, you figured that he deserved a jar of jam just as much as anyone else. It wasn’t like he was a criminal or anything of the sort…He was just, well… Him. 

The knock you deliver to his door is just as soft and cheerful as the others had been. Though this time you have to remind yourself to smile, it didn’t come naturally when your heart was palpitating at a near alarming rate. — You wait another minute, nearly two, but there’s still no answer. With a small frown you try your luck again.

Another soft knock. 

“Hello? Is anybody there?” You call out, the shaky edge to your voice coming off a lot stronger than you’d hoped. But you hadn't come all the way out here for nothing, and you would be damned if you didn’t get this last jar off your hands. A few moments later, you hear it, the soft rustling of something, of someone, moving on the other side. 

And much to your delight, the door swings open mere moments later. Though the sight you’re met with does little to ease the agitated beating of your heart. A tangled mess of unkempt dark brown hair, paired with fierce and menacing eyes and a nasty scowl that stretches across his pale lips. — Peach Beomgyu looked ready to beat you bloody. 

Your words get caught in your throat, and as much as you try to swallow, not an ounce of saliva will go down. Clearing your throat, you readjust the basket in your hands, wordlessly extending it in front of you. Beomgyu’s gaze falls on the lonesome jar before snapping back up to you. His brows furrow, twisting his face into even more of an accusing look as his eyes narrow on you. 

“What’s the meaning of this?” His voice has got a clean cut edge to it, sharp and impeccably demanding. Suddenly, your usual lines all diminish into nothing, your brain melting into a pile of jam as your mouth goes dry. “I… I brought you some-” — “I can see what it is, do you take me for an idiot?” He snaps, effortlessly cutting you off as he shoves your basket back with a look of sheer distaste. 

Your mouth opens and closes, like that of a goldfish mindlessly swimming around in its bowl. “Y-Yes but you see I”, you swallow, “I made it myself.” And though you knew your words to be true, they were hardly convincing as you stumbled over them. Beomgyu’s brows rose on his forehead, but he did not look surprised, merely lightly interested. You counted the win anyway. 

With trembling arms you extend him the basket once more, encouraging him to retrieve the jar. But he only looked at it as though it would jump up and bite him in the face. “Well you’ve wasted your time then”, he grunts, averting his gaze as he urges you off his porch. You won’t budge, feet clamming to the old wooden boards as you stubbornly present the jar for him. 

Beomgyu scoffs, running a hand through his dark hair, and you’re surprised when his fingers don't catch onto the mess of strands, in fact the brown locks looked almost…soft. You shake your head, blinking twice as you pick the jar up, shoving it against his hard chest as you peer over at him with a determined expression, your lips pressed together in a firm line. 

“I’m sure you can reconsider”, you probe, much to little avail as Beomgyu’s scowl only grows. You were sure you’d overstepped for good this time. — But he doesn’t shout, nor does he tell you to get the hell away from his house. He chuckles. And though it’s far from an actual laugh, it’s something other than the tired and displeased groans. It makes your stomach flutter in an unfamiliar way. 

You almost expect him to wipe a half-hearted tear from his eye. To maybe condole you on your gullibleness or your overbearing kindness. Well, and a small part of you hopes he might actually accept the jar. — He does none of those things, instead he takes a small, almost unnoticeable step back. And before you know it, the door is slammed shut in your face, leaving you alone in the dark and menacing forest once more. 

With a petulant huff, you glance toward the window by the door, just in time to see him drawing the peach colored curtains in front of the glass, blocking him from your view. “Bastard”, you mutter as you step off the porch, kneeling down in front of it to place the jar down, “I’ll just put you right here…” 

As you trudge down the dirt path leading from his cottage and back to the village, you can feel his lingering gaze on you, peeking through the light and peachy curtains. You smile to yourself, feeling accomplished despite his refusal, for you did not take his cruel words personally. — At the end of the day an angry person will always be the angriest with himself. 

⸝⸝

It quickly becomes somewhat of a habit for you to make fifty jars instead of forty-nine. At first you had told yourself that the number was just much more satisfactory in itself, and that it was easier to make five full batches rather than four and then some. But you could only lie to yourself for so long. And when you find yourself on Beomgyu’s doorstep a third time in the span of two weeks, you know that the extra jar is more than just a number. 

He doesn’t answer you when you call for him, but you know he’s there, listening, even though he doesn't want to, because he can’t help himself. And each time, you place the little jar on his porch. The orange jam is a stark contrast to the dull forest all around, and is easily spotted. — You keep returning, not because you fancied being ignored outside his shut door, or because you enjoyed the muddy walk to his little house. But because whenever you returned, the jar from last time would be gone. 

And when you for a fifth time find yourself on his porch, swaying back and forth as you hum along to a quiet melody, you’re surprised when the door actually opens. He’s frowning, lips tugged into what you presumed to be a permanent scowl. You wondered if he ever smiled. — Beomgyu gives you a quick one over, his gaze undoubtedly lingering by the jar in your basket. 

He clears his throat, “What the hell are you still doing here?” His question catches you off guard and you blink as your attention returns to the present moment. “Huh?” Is all you can muster, the response coming out as a question of your own. — Beomgyu scoffs, rolling his eyes as if he’d just asked you the most obvious thing. “You’ve been out here for twenty minutes, what the fuck do you want?”

Twenty minutes? Had it really been that long.. You would admit that you usually lingered for a minute or two before placing the little jar and returning back home. It wasn’t like you were waiting for him, well… You might have been. Suppose that today your mind had travelled a little too far, even for your own liking. But to think that you’d spent a whole twenty minutes in front of his door, lost in thoughts.. 

“I… Well I..” You bite the inside of your cheek, your brows creasing into a confused frown. You open your mouth to speak, but what comes out is not a coherent response, rather… “Your hair is brown.”

Beomgyu looks taken aback for once, his own frown deepening tenfold as he regards you with confusion. “So?” He retorts, folding his arms across his chest. — You don’t think it had ever occurred to you, but the unkempt and wild mess atop his head was a dark shade of brown, nearly black. It suited him, sure, it made his already sharp features and dark eyes stand out even more. But you couldn’t help but wonder why… 

All of the people in Strawberryland had cheerful and bright colors. You thought of Blueberry Kai’s bright blue hair, Lemon Drop Soobin’s warm yellow and Yeonjun Sorbet’s striking red. Yet Peach Beomgyu had…brown hair? It didn’t make any sense. — Beomgyu looks almost insulted as he waits for you to respond, impatiently tapping his foot against the threshold. 

“Isn’t your hair supposed to be…peach colored?” You say, pointing a curious finger to the mess on his head. Beomgyu frowns, reaching a hand up to run through the dark locks as he waves you off, huffing in dismay. “What’s it to you?” He tsk’s, his attention flickering down to the jam in your basket once more, and only when his gaze meets yours do you register the silent question behind his eyes. 

“O-Oh, right I brought you more jam!” You force a small smile, the least you could do was be polite. You were determined to make friends with him, one way or the other. And as you hand him the glass container, Beomgyu takes it. It’s a huge first step, and you feel your heart swelling at the action. He twists the jar between his fingers, studying it like it might explode on him any second now. 

At last, he gives a small hum of approval. — “It’s good, right?” Your question comes out too cherry, already celebrating your small victory. Beomgyu quickly shoots that bird down with a sneer. “I’m being polite, there’s a difference.” He clicks his tongue against the roof of his mouth, his eyes taking over your hopeful frame once more. “Though I’m sure you couldn’t tell the difference even if you wanted to.” 

The door slams shut on your nose. 

Suddenly, the forest is cold again, the heat falls from your face, the fire coursing within you being drowned out by a bucket of cold water. Well, there goes that. You wait by his door for another five minutes, but the small cottage is silent. The curtains are drawn, shutting you out, just like he did everybody else. 

With heavy steps you climb off the porch, cringing at how the old and withered boards creaked under your weight. Your sigh echoes against the tall trees that loom above you, and you slowly make your way down the muddy path. You had noticed on your second visit that flowers didn’t seem to grow here, any sign of vegetation seemingly drowned out by the nearly unbearing anger and resentment that lingered in these woods. 

Had Beomgyu really caused all of that? 

You think back to your brief encounter with him, with Beomgyu. But no matter how hard you tried, your mind seemed to get caught on his brown hair, you couldn’t quite shake it off. You only knew one other brown-haired individual here, and that was Gingerbread Taehyun. But Beomgyu and Taehyun were far from alike, and you shake your head once more. 

Something was wrong, very clearly so. For the way Beomgyu had disregarded the matter, shoving it aside like it pained him to be reminded of… You longed to know what could have caused it. And you find yourself imagining a different Beomgyu, a Beomgyu that smiled. With light and peachy hair, a pink blush coating his soft cheeks, warming his pale face up. You imagine a Beomgyu with dimples that dented into his skin hard from laughter. 

You imagine a happy Beomgyu. 

The fantasy makes your steps return to their usual light skip, and by the time you re-enter the lively village, you feel happy again. 

⸝⸝

With your basket filled once more, you head down the cobbled road, taking you around Strawberry town. Today you were in a particularly good mood. You don’t know if it had to do with meeting Blueberry Kai out by his berry bushes, or if it had to do with the little rabbit you saw in your garden this morning. But you were determined to make this day a perfect one. 

In fact, you were in such a joyous mood that the dark clouds crowding the village did not bother you as you went knocking on each and every door. For each smile you received, for each jar you handed out, the love beating within your heart only seemed to grow. —  When you turn off the large road, and venture onto the muddy path taking you deep within the forest, you’re filled to the brim with love. And if there was one person in Strawberry village that needed it, it was Peach Beomgyu. 

You think you’re about halfway there when the first droplet lands on the tip of your nose. The cold water makes you frown as it slides down your face, catching on your bottom lip. Sticking your tongue out to taste it, the sweet flavor fills your mouth. After that another one follows, then another one, and another one. It’s not long before rainfall is pouring down over you, clinging to the leaves and splashing against the forest floor in dramatic effect. 

Blinking the droplets from your eyes, you scurry forward, pulling your coat tighter around yourself as you hurry. Mud clams to your orange shoes, dirtying them in disgraceful shades of brown. But you carry on, relief flooding your chest as the familiar little house floats into vision. You do not stop to consider who’s door you were actually knocking on when you slam your fist against the weathered wood. 

Today, you have no time to wait outside for another five minutes, you have no time to bicker with the grumpy man over his doorstep and you certainly don’t want to turn on your heel and endure the unpleasant walk home. There was little that could diskindle your spirits, but rain and mud were definitely two of them. 

Much to your immense relief and surprise, the door glides open a mere minute later, revealing a confused looking Beomgyu. The smile stretching across your lips only seems to make his scowl grow. Yet you persist, giving him your widest and most pleading eyes as you silently beg for him to let you inside. — Beomgyu’s harsh gaze flickers from your wet coat, clinging to your body and the adamant look on your face before shifting to the heavy rain that battered against his porch. 

With a displeased groan he steps to the side, allowing you to skip inside the small cottage. Your excitement as you enter his home is followed up by a small squeal, your gaze darting around as you take in the unfamiliar surroundings. — Beomgyu’s house was unlike anything you had ever imagined, not to say that you had spent a deliberate amount of time trying to figure out how he lived, you had merely been…Curious, so to say. 

From the peachy curtains to the matching sets of creamy pink pillows that adorned his small sofa, everything seemed to follow a peachy theme. The fireplace sparking in the middle of the room draws your attention and you quickly find yourself huddling in front of it as you rub your cold hands together. 

Your quiet ‘woah’ as you pull your orange coat from your wet body rings out into the silent house. The kitchen by the corner looks to have been used recently, a small pot of something placed on the stove. Amazed by the fact that Peach Beomgyu lived like any other resident in Strawberry village, your jaw hangs open as you remain frozen in place. 

Somewhere behind you, Beomgyu emerges from the hallway. He stops a good distance from you, leaning against one of the crowded bookshelves pushed up alongside the wall, his arms folded across his chest. You send him a bright smile, “Thank you”, you say, not knowing how else to show your gratitude for his hospitality. 

Beomgyu rolls his eyes, a small scoff passing his lips as he averts his gaze, his dark eyes lingering on something you couldn’t quite catch. A brief silence follows, it’s almost awkward.. You’re not exactly sure what to say, what he would appreciate hearing, if anything even suited those pesky ears of his. 

So you hum, quietly rocking back and forth on your feet as you glance at the decorations above the fireplace. They were nothing fancy, and most of the tiny figurines looked old, perhaps he’d inherited them. Come to think of it, you don’t remember ever hearing anything about a family member of his. The thought sadeness you for reasons you cannot understand. It wasn’t like Beomgyu was opposed to the solitary life he lived, he’d chosen it for himself, hadn’t he? 

Yet you can’t help but purse your lips at the thought of living like this, no matter how cozy his quaint little cottage was, it still lacked the warmth of love. — “It is a lovely home you’ve got”, you say, trying your best to show interest in the way he’d decorated the space. But Beomgyu doesn’t seem to buy into the mundane compliment. He merely shrugs, letting out a small grunt as his dark eyes flicker back to you. 

“Why were you out in the rain?” It’s the first time he’s ever asked you an actual question, the first time he’d even seemed moderately interested in anything that regarded you. Your smile only widens, and you can see the way his face twists in distaste at your ever so cheerful attitude. “Well why do you think? I was delivering jam!” The exclamation immediately makes you jump as you come to your senses and you reach for the basket you had discarded on the floor. 

The small jar is wet and you wipe it against the sleeve of your shirt before skipping over to him in order to hand him it. Beomgyu’s arms remain stubbornly crossed as his gaze flits between the orange jam and your hopeful grin. With a small groan he relents and plucks it from your waiting hand, shoving it onto the shelf next to him as he averts his attention elsewhere. 

You wondered if your presence made him uncomfortable. Judging by the way he stood, the greater portion of his body turned as far away from you as possible, and his jaw clenched, you would guess it did. Then again, was there anyone Peach Beomgyu liked? You did not take his grumpy demeanor or his shortcut responses personally. Still, there was an unmistakable opportunity at hand, and you would be a fool not to take it. 

“Mind if I take a seat?” You ask, but you’re already approaching the small couch. Beomgyu’s lip twitches, but he gives a small nod, his arms returning to their crossed position over his chest. His sofa is oddly comfortable, allowing you to sink into the cushion as you lean back slightly. The warmth of the fire caresses your cold face, slowly melting the layer of metaphorical ice that had built around you. No amount of fire would be able to melt the harsh ice block surrounding Beomgyu, you thought with a small grin. 

He remains unmoving and unspeaking, quietly watching you from his spot by the corner of the room. You did not insult him on his lack of manners, he had actually allowed you inside his home even as you showed up unannounced, perhaps that was more than enough. — Your attention falls on your muddy shoes and a pang of guilt flares through you. “Oh, sorry, I should’ve taken these off!” 

Beomgyu opens his mouth to speak but is quickly interrupted as you kick the pointy orange heels off your feet, scurrying toward the door as you place them right in front of it. “Sorry, I’ll clean it up, don't worry!” You say as you dart for his kitchen. Quickly disoriented, you tug open drawers and pull cabinet doors in search of anything to clean the stain you had left on his floors. “Where do you keep your towels?” You ask, so caught up in trying to resolve the mess you’d unintentionally caused that you didn’t even notice him creeping up behind you. 

“Here”, he says as he hands you a peach colored rag. You freeze, for his voice came from just above your ear, his chest nearly pressed against your back. The scent of fresh peaches made you nearly drowsy as you blink before gingerly accepting the cloth from him, trying your hardest to ignore the way your fingers brushed against one another, the tingle that the soft fuzz coating his skin left. “I… Thanks”, you coyly mumble, desperately wishing he wouldn’t catch on to the stammer of your voice as you round him in the small kitchen, quickly slipping away from his intoxicating presence. 

What was that.. You think to yourself, brows knitted together in a confused frown as you find yourself on the floor, scrubbing the muddy stains away. The sounds of his approaching footsteps make your eyes widen, and you refuse to turn your head in his direction. — “It’s really not necessary”, he mutters, the usual grumpiness to his voice replaced with something akin to guilt. But you firmly shake your head, scrubbing even harder at the old wood. “It’s fine, no problem! I caused it!” You chirp, ignoring his small huff as you continue to clean. 

When you’re done you gingerly rise to your feet, clutching the now dirty rag between your fingers as you bite the inside of your cheek. Beomgyu reaches for it again, but you quickly pull back, you don’t think you could bear feeling his skin against yours a second time. “I’ll put it away!” You quickly say, plastering on the biggest of grins you could muster, “Where do you want it?” 

Beomgyu’s expression is unreadable as he studies you for a moment. It looks almost as if he’s about to say something, but he stops himself, shaking his head once as he points down the hall. Quickly nodding, you follow in that direction, the sounds of your feet padding against the floor ringing in your ears. 

Finally away from his intense gaze, you exhale a sigh of relief as you turn to relocate yourself. The dark hallway had led you to what you presumed to be a small washroom, racks of clothes crowded the vast majority of the space, and you found a small sink as well. You place the dirty cloth in the hamper before turning to head back. But before you can even get as much as another step in, a door to your left catches your attention. It’s slightly ajar, letting on to the bed inside. 

Quickly glancing down the hall once more, you dare a small peek inside. Beomgyu’s bedroom did not match the rest of the house. It lacked all the peachy colors, instead it was crowded from head to toe in… books. Sure the bookshelves in the living room had caught your attention earlier, but just as the old figurines, you’d figured that it was something he’d inherited. Now you can’t help but wonder if Beomgyu actually enjoyed literature. While the prospect did indeed seem odd, it wasn’t entirely out of place either. There was only so much entertainment out here..

But before you get the chance to investigate further, the sounds of floorboards creaking pulls you from your brief trance. Sharply turning on your heel, you make your way back into the living room where Beomgyu was waiting for you. — The rain was still pouring down outside, and you had little clue of just how long you were going to be stuck here. 

As your gaze falls on Beomgyu, you feel your breath getting caught in your throat. You don’t know what it was, but something had changed. Something that made you so impeccably drawn to him in a way you could not fathom. You tried to reason with yourself, you tried to shift the blame onto the weather, onto the clumsy mistake of waltzing inside his home without as much as a second thought. 

But as your eyes linger by his dark ones, the narrowed gaze he still held, you find that it’s none of those things. Suddenly you know why you keep returning to this small hut, why you bother with the twenty minute walk back and forth, why you face rejection on his doorstep each time. — You felt empathy for him, perhaps even pity. You pitied Beomgyu, the lonely boy who lived all alone out in the forest, with no one to come visit. 

And perhaps that was naive of you. To even think that he cared about something as trivial as a bit of company. Yet you couldn’t find it in you to take his mean and cruel demeanor to heart. Because no matter how harsh the bark was, he never seemed to bite. He had let you inside his home, in spite of your persistent nagging on his porch for the past weeks. He hadn’t minded when you dirtied his floors, and even now, he didn’t seem to want you to leave. 

So were you really that naive to think that what you were doing was right? That what you were doing was appreciated by him, even if he didn’t show it. You want to think so. 

“Do you want me to make you tea?” You chirp, breaking the thick silence that had filled the small living room. Beomgyu cocks an eyebrow at you, but merely shrugs. You weren’t even sure if he had the ingredients to make tea, you had just assumed… It was something everyone had, no? 

Ignoring his nonchalant response, you walk past him and into the small little kitchen once more. It wasn’t at all like your big one at home, but then again, you doubted that he spent his days making fifty jars worth of apricot jam. — He doesn’t follow you, and part of you is relieved. His absence allows you to work casually as you still tried to figure out what about him had made you so nervous all of a sudden. 

You take your time as you bring out a pot, setting it down on the stove as you fill it with water from the tap. Once it’s slowly boiling, you rummage around to find yourselves a pair of cups to drink from. Pulling drawers upon drawers open, you cough as the smell of dust invades your senses, some of these looked to have been kept shut for years. 

As a last resort, you tug the cabinet door above the fridge open. And your eyes immediately widen as they fall on the empty jars stacked inside. All of them are cleaned out, the glass reflecting in the dim light of the kitchen. Your gaze lingers by the orange lids, and the silk ribbons you’d tied around them still intact. A small smile tugs at your lips, your heart warming at the sight. He even kept the jars. 

Quickly slamming the cabinet shut when he approaches, you turn to him with a flushed expression. “Where are your cups?” You squeak, the surprise in your tone evident, not having expected him to reappear so soon. — Beomgyu leans against the doorframe, his arms folded across his chest as he nods toward the one drawer you had yet to open. Mentally slapping yourself, you turn to it with a tight smile as you pull it open. 

As you prepare the herbs for the tea and check on the water, you try to make plain conversation. You ask him about the weather, about what he does during the days or if he has any upcoming plans. You find that he’s a very concise individual, and you’re never able to pull more than a short sentence from him as he begrudgingly responds to your persistent interrogation. 

Still, he stays in the kitchen until you finish pouring the cups. Whether that was because he didn’t trust you around his house or because he wanted to be there, remained unknown to you. 

The tea is boiling hot against your tongue, yet you insistently bring it to your lips, taking small and hesitant sips as you desperately avoid his gaze. For someone so short of words, he seemed to have no problem staring at you. You told yourself that it might have to do with his lack of social interaction. But his unyielding gaze slowly chipped away at your resolve, making you all the more anxious as you glanced out the window, wishing for the rain to let up soon. 

It still felt so surreal, standing in Peach Beomgyu’s kitchen, drinking tea from his cups, as if this was just another Thursday afternoon. But his prolonged silence made the growing tension between you feel anything but mundane and ordinary. Did he really not have anything to say? You had tried every approach imaginable, there was nothing that would get him to utter more than a small hum. 

As your eyes peer out the window, and over what you imagined to once have been a garden, a new question surfaces. — Your attention flickers back to him, still by the door frame, he’s gripping the cup in one hand, barely having sipped his tea, he seems far too preoccupied with watching you. 

“Don’t you grow any peaches?” You ask, letting your head fall to the side as you take your turn in studying him. Beomgyu’s unreadable expression morphs into a small frown, and he ponders your question for a moment. When a whole minute passes, you think he might not reply at all, it wouldn’t be completely unexpected, for he had little manners as it was. But then he suddenly shifts his weight over to his other leg, readjusting his hold on the cup. 

“No.” 

He states firmly, finally bringing the peachy mug to his lips as he takes a sip of his tea. It’s your turn to frown, your gaze dropping to the brown mixture swirling in your own cup as you bite the inside of your cheek. “Why not?” — Everyone in Strawberryland tended to their fruits, so why didn’t he? 

Beomgyu shrugs, appearing more than disinterested in the conversation taking place. “I don’t like them”, he says, the nonchalance in his tone taking you aback as your eyes snap to him. Don’t like them? But he was Peach Beomgyu, was he not supposed to love peaches? You want to ask him what he means by that, what made him so resentful of the one thing he represented. But the closed off look on his face made you waver. You did not want to blindly push and prod at buttons which you had no clue of. 

You remain silent, awkwardly sipping your tea as you avoid his burning gaze. 

And as your cups emptied out, the rain stopped. 

⸝⸝

Peach Beomgyu did not like visitors. In fact, he detested them. Much so that he had gone to the quite extreme length of putting up warning signs in front of his house. And while the signs did their job at keeping nosey little kids out, they seemed futile on that persistent ball of joy that would skip past them as she neared his cottage. 

Beomgyu could not understand what made Little Apricot come back over and over again. He could not understand what kept you in such a jolly mood and he could certainly not fathom the reasoning behind the little jars of jam you would leave behind. — It irked him in a way that was beyond explainable. And every three or four days, he would be pulled from whatever book he was reading by two curt knocks to his door. 

Internally groaning he would shake his head, ignoring the fierce ray of sunshine on the other side. But you just wouldn’t leave. The sounds of you humming along to a light melody would slip through the cracks of his shut door, it would creep inside his house and dance across him, taunting him with its sickly sweetness. Beomgyu would swat it away, pressing his nose further into his book as he desperately tried to ignore any signs of your presence. 

You would always leave after a few minutes, taking your light and cherry song with you as you did. And Beomgyu would always sigh out in relief, ignoring the small tug at his chest when the silence enveloped him once more. — He would get up, carefully pull the curtains to the side as he watched your bright orange coat disappear into the thick forest of trees. 

Then he would open his door, stopping in his tracks as his gaze flickered down to the little jar you’d left behind. When it first occurred he’d slammed the door shut. Ignoring the jar for a good twenty minutes before ripping the door open again with a frustrated huff, finding the jam still there, its bright orange color stinging his eyes. 

For some reason, Beomgyu had picked it up, he’d turned it in his hands and opened the lid. The creamy jam smelled just like you, the soft and sweet aroma of apricot prickling his nose in a most unfamiliar way. And he’d taken the jar inside, stubbornly ignoring it for a whole day before he finally caved. — It tasted just as delicious as it smelled, as delicious as you smelled. 

Beomgyu finished the jar in half a day, and when it was all empty, he found himself staring at the clean glass with a confused frown. It was just jam. He scoffed as he shoved the empty jar into a cabinet, blatantly ignoring the fact that he had yet to throw it away, telling himself that he might find use for it in the future.   

When you returned mere days later, he ignored you, yet he found another jar, just like the first on his porch. It would go on like that, and for some reason, Beomgyu found himself listening after that sickeningly cheerful melody you always sang. And everytime you knocked on his door, his fingers would itch to reach out and open it, for reasons he could not understand, and did not want to. 

But on your seventh return, you did not give your usual curt knocks, you did not hum along to any melody at all. At first, Beomgyu didn't even believe it to be you. But as he opened the door, and found Little Apricot on his porch, drenched from head to toe, he found himself unable to move. Not even when you pleaded with him so nicely did it register what you were asking. 

And suddenly you were inside his home, the place he treasured so dearly and had sealed off to the rest of the world. Yet you had managed to worm your way inside, and the feeling that bloomed within his chest was like no other. — You were everywhere, the same sickeningly sweet scent of your apricot jam now filled his entire home. It clung to the walls, soaked in the carpets and dusted off on the furniture. No matter how hard he tried he couldn’t block it out, and you occupied his mind and body fully. It confused him. 

You quickly made yourself at home, and Beomgyu noted that you were just as dutiful about any other task as you were your jam. Rushing about even though you barely found your way, tugging cabinet doors and pulling drawers open as you made the two of you tea. — He doesn’t know why he lets your eager hands wander over his belongings, why he drinks the tea you make him or why he even bothers to answer any of your invasive and prying questions. 

He feels nearly dizzy in your presence, it’s a strange and uncanny feeling, a feeling he hasn’t felt in years, if ever. And Beomgyu doesn't know if he should fear the warm and fuzzy feeling that spreads within his chest as he looks at you, or if he should give in to it completely. Though if he did, he feared that you wouldn’t ever look at him the same. 

Oh but Beomgyu likes the way you look at him. With big and hopeful eyes. You don’t seem to understand just how messed up he is, or perhaps you do, and in that case you had to be stupid to ignore it. Naive. That was probably the right word. Gullible, sweet, and far too kind for your own good. Did you not know not to trust everything you see? He shakes his head at the thought. 

Still, there’s an odd feeling of comfort in the way you embrace him, with your kind words and quiet care as you deliver him jam. He doesn’t want to let go of that feeling just yet, though if he ever tries to pursue it, he thinks you might crumple in front of him. — It has him torn. And as he lies in bed that night, the smell of apricots linger around him, pressing in on him with a demanding force. 

He groans as he turns over, burying his face in the pillows. But all he can see is you, your bright orange coat, and he can smell you, you’re everywhere, plaguing his body and mind. He twists uncomfortably, stubbornly ignoring the heat pooling in his stomach, refusing to let his hands wander as he tries to block out any thought of you. 

Beomgyu wishes that you won’t come by his house again. He knows he won’t be able to stop himself if you do. 

⸝⸝

The soft knock to your door makes you tear yourself from the empty jars you were currently wiping down, discarding them on the countertop as you make your way over to the entrance. Your steps are light and cherry as you skip over, fingers twisting the lock, an excited grin already plastered across your face. — “Blueberry Kai!” You squeal when you’re met with the sight of the blue haired boy, his tall frame looming over you as he gives a shy nod. 

“Hi Little Apricot!” He says, his face flushing in an adorable shade of blue. Your gaze drifts to his hands, clutching a blue box tightly. “I uh..” He sends you a coy smile as he extends the box, “Got you this.. As a thank you, for you know.. All you do.” 

It’s with wide eyes that you happily accept the gift, feeling its weight in your hands as you gently pluck the lid. Your attention falls on the freshly baked blueberry pie and the sweet aroma immediately fills your nostrils. With a wide grin, you glance up at him, “You’re the best Kai!” 

The two of you settle out in your garden, amidst the many apricot trees you had planted, all blooming with ripe and orange fruits. Hungrily wolfing down the pie Kai had brought, you barely make time for conversation as you focus on savoring the flavors on your tongue. And when you for the fifth time exclaim, “It’s delicious!”, Kai can’t help but chuckle. 

Once the wave of desire has cooled off, and your stomach starts to feel full, you lean back in your chair as you regard him with a questioning expression. It looked like something was bothering him, for his usual lopsided smile was nowhere to be found, and his brows furrowed across his forehead. — “Is something up?” You ask him as you wipe your lips on the corner of a napkin, gently placing it down as you twist in your seat. 

Kai’s head snaps in your direction, and he gives a sheepish look, as if you’d caught his drift of mind. “Yeah I just..” He trails off, as if unsure of how to word himself properly. You wait, your legs swinging back and forth as your bare feet drag through the wild grass, the feeling tickling your sensitive skin.

“Have you been seeing Peach Beomgyu?” 

The question was not one you’d expected, and you feel your face heat up as you turn your gaze back to the blue haired boy. “I deliver him jams, just like everyone else!” You say, plastering on an even wider grin as you try and brush past the topic. But Kai doesn’t let it go, his brows creasing even further as he leans forward. “Why? I mean, it’s not like he’s done anything for you.. And I’m not saying I don’t think it’s kind of you”, he takes a breath, slowly letting it go. “But what if he’s just using you, Apricot?”  

Your frown makes him immediately continue as he says; “I mean, he’s not exactly friendly.. I’m just afraid you’ll end up getting taken advantage of, your kindness is something many of us take for granted…” — His words made you think, your chin jutted out as your mind traveled back to the visits you’d paid Beomgyu. You recall the many times he’d slammed the door in your face, and the times in which he hadn’t opened it at all. Suppose Kai might have a point… 

But you also remember that rainy day not too long ago. You remember the way his gaze lingered by you, the way your heart fluttered at his mere presence. It couldn’t possibly be what Kai was implying, could it? If he was really taking advantage of your kindness, why did your heart beat so quickly at the thought of his name? 

“I think he deserves the jam just as much as anyone else in Strawberryland”, you state, nodding to yourself as you sink back in the chair, arms spread on the armrests. Kai bites the inside of his cheek remaining quiet, though the look on his face told you that he wished to intervene further. 

“I talk to him”, you shrug, acting as if the matter was nothing short of common for you. — “He is actually quite an interesting person, if you give him a chance.” You send Kai a small smile, but the blue haired boy doesn’t seem to buy it as he runs a hand through his short hair. “I don’t know Apricot… There’s a reason he lives out there..” — “Like what?” You cut him off, leaning forward in an instant with an almost challenging look on your face. 

Kai opens his mouth to speak, then he stops himself. You watch as he battles with himself for a moment before finally sighing. “Well he’s…Different.” — “Different how?” You knew you were pushing him now, and that he soon would be caving, but you didn’t care. For a small part of you, a part you had tried to ignore for long, felt the need to defend Beomgyu, even if you hardly knew him, it felt like your responsibility. Because if you didn’t, then who would? 

“You don’t know?” Kai suddenly asks and your face falls for a moment. Didn’t know what? Kai shifts in his seat as he glances around your flourishing garden, as if checking for witnesses, and when he speaks again, it's in a hushed whisper. “You know… About the peaches..”, he murmurs, swallowing as he holds your gaze. 

“The peaches?” You repeat, a little too loud for his liking as he winces. “Yes”, he mutters between sealed lips. “He can’t… I mean, he says he doesn’t like them, but the truth is he can’t even grow them.” Kai leans back up as soon as he’s uttered the words, hurriedly checking his surroundings once more before shrinking back against the backrest of his chair. 

Your face contorts into a confused grimace, “Can’t grow peaches?” That’s ridiculous, everyone in Strawberryland grows their own fruits, what could possibly make him so different? Kai slowly nods as he fiddles with the spoon discarded on his empty plate. “I mean, I’m sure he doesn’t want to either, but even if he did, he physically can’t”, he shrugs before continuing, “That’s why he moved out there, so that the rest wouldn’t have to know how much of a failure he was…” He says the last words with a hint of sympathy, and you couldn’t help the way your chest churned at the thought. 

“You’re saying I should stay away from him?” It’s not a question but a statement, you didn’t need an answer because Kai had already made himself clear. Yet he gives a firm nod, letting the silverware drop back onto the plate. “Yes”, he says, “I’m worried that whatever curse lingers around him might transfer onto you…Besides, who knows what he’s capable of..” 

It hurt, hearing him speak so negatively of Beomgyu. Suppose you had grown a small attachment to the grumpy peach, so what? Delivering him some jam every now and then certainly didn’t harm anyone. You failed to see Kai’s reasoning, failed to see the worry laced within his words. Still, you did something most uncharacteristic, you lied.

“I won’t go see him.” 

⸝⸝

Your basket isn’t as heavy as usual when you skip down the cobbled road. Perhaps it had to do with the fact that you had only brought three jars of jam today, and they were all meant for one person. — Throwing a final glance over your shoulder, you venture off the main road, emerging into the thick treeline as you begin the journey to Peach Beomgyu’s house. 

Not only had you brought jam, but you’d put in the effort of baking muffins as well. They had come out slightly burnt, their edges a refined and dark black but you didn’t mind, they tasted just as sweet and you were sure they would go well with the jam. — To thank him, that was the goal of today, you told yourself. To thank him for his hospitality as he let you stay last time, and enough jars of jam to last him well over two weeks. 

As you near the now familiar house, you can’t help but feel a sense of excitement. It flutters in the pits of your stomach, swirling around as your heart beats steadily within your chest. Had you not been so focused on the task at hand, perhaps you would’ve noticed the way the trees seemed to sway, the leaves rustling despite the lack of wind and the eerie silence that fell over the woods on this particular day. 

But you don’t, and soon enough, you’re making the steps up his creaking porch. Your soft knock somehow seems to ring out like thunder in the thick and quiet air. — Glancing around, you prepare for the inevitable wait as you sway back and forth on your feet. But to your surprise, it is mere moments later that the door is ripped open, revealing a disheveled Beomgyu on the other side. 

Immediately you notice the subtle flush across his normally pale and cold cheeks. His dark hair stands in all directions, and you frown as your gaze flickers over his dark eyes, his pupils widened to an extent that nearly concerns you. Was he sick? Had you come at a bad time? Your attention falls on the way his chest heaves with each jagged breath he takes, and it trails along his arm, finally landing on the way his fingers bore into the wood of the doorframe to steady himself, knuckles turning white at the sheer force he used. 

“Beomgyu, is everything okay?” You ask, blinking the shock away as you readjust the grip on your basket. He doesn’t say anything, and you were just about to suggest coming back another time when he suddenly lurches forward. — You barely have time to realize what’s happening, but the feel of his vice-like grip around your wrist makes you wince as he yanks you inside. 

The door slams shut behind you and the smell of peaches suddenly infiltrates your every sense. You don’t think you have ever smelled anything like it before. It was strong, sweet, almost sickly so. It felt far from the citrusy tang apricots carried and you frown as you glance around the area. His living room looks the same, kitchen too, where was the smell coming from? — A chill runs down your spine as you pick up on the sound of a lock clicking behind you. Beomgyu’s harsh exhale is hot against the back of your neck, and it makes the hairs there stand tall as you freeze in place. 

When he places an equally warm hand on your shoulder do you realize that the smell is coming from him. He’s practically radiating it. And along with the thick layer of heat that coats him, it pulsates off of him with steady rhythm, slapping you across the face as you squint up at him. Just what was going on.. “Beomgyu..?” He doesn’t answer, and you fervently search his gaze, only to find that he’s looking at something completely different. 

You cover your mouth with a trembling hand, a confused and alarmed frown painting the rest of your face. He must have caught something, a virus of some sort, something that made his body flare up like this, something that made him smell so…So truly divine. You shake your head, screwing your eyes shut as you take a step back. 

He still hasn’t said anything, not a single word from the moment he ripped his door open. And when he takes a step forward, you find yourself immediately faltering backward. He chases you, with deliberate and long strides, and you don’t stop until your back hits one of his overcrowded shelves, the books and figurines on it rattling as you do. You turn your head in surprise, only to feel his hot fingers on your chin as he steers you back his way. 

Beomgyu pries your hand from your lips, his breath audibly hitching in his throat when his eyes fall on your open mouth once more. He looks ready to swallow each shaky exhale you emit, and before you can protest does he slam his lips against yours. — Your eyes shoot open, your hands flying to his shoulders in an attempt to push him back. But Beomgyu was strong, scarily so, and he easily shoves you up against the shelf. 

The small noise of surprise gets drowned out by his harsh groan, his hands gripping at your waist as he shoves you against the stacked books. — “B-Beomgyu wait- This isn’t…” You  manage to gasp when he parts for air. His face is flushed in a light pink, and the mess of dark brown hair lays in uneven sections across his hungry eyes as he pants. It didn’t make any sense, none of this did. 

Your basket had fallen to the floor due to all the commotion and one of the jars had rolled onto the hard wood. Beomgyu didn’t even seem to register the chaos he was creating as he pressed his lips back on yours. He kisses you with a need best described as insatiable, leaving room for nothing but his demanding ways as his tongue shoves past your parted lips, slipping into your mouth with urgency. 

The shock slowly begins to wear off and you realize what’s actually going on. Peach Beomgyu was kissing you, well, he was damn near eating you. It didn’t… You didn’t… Your thoughts seemed to cut short, any sense of semblance slipping through the cracks of your fingers as you helplessly chased them. — You should push him off, you should yell at him and ask what in the world had gotten into him. 

Because Peach Beomgyu didn’t make friends, and hell, he certainly didn’t kiss people. This was completely unwarranted and you deserved more than an explanation for his near outrageous actions. 

For some reason, you find yourself pulling him even closer. 

It barely registered at first. Your fingers moved on their own as they clutched the shirt he was wearing, tugging him against you with a force just as strong as his. You couldn’t explain it, the need to be close, the need to give in to every single thought that yelled for you to back away. — Kai’s words linger in your scrambled mind when Beomgyu’s hands go to the back of your thighs, hoisting you into his arms, forcing a proximity that was dangerously close. 

Perhaps you should’ve listened to him when he’d told you to stay away. When he’d warned you about Beomgyu. Something was not right with him, you knew that, every fiber of your being told you that this was a bad idea. Yet your mind couldn’t seem to overpower the fire that spread inside your heart, clutching it tightly in its grip, pulling you towards Beomgyu. 

You have always followed your heart. You followed it when you delivered jam, because it fluttered when the others appreciatively accepted their jar. You followed it because it beats extra hard when someone smiles your way. You followed it because it made you happy. Even now, you followed it, you followed it through the thick and dark trees, through the wilted flowers and the eerie silence that led all the way to his house. 

You followed your heart all the way to Beomgyu, until you finally found yourself in his arms. 

A noise of surprise rips from the back of your throat as he walks you over to the couch, setting you down amongst the peachy pillows. He stares down at you for a moment, his tongue swiping across your plump lips, and you find yourself mesmerized by him. In the dim light of the fireplace, he didn't look at all like his cold and mean self. Beomgyu looked warm, flourishing and alive. 

The strong scent of peaches radiated off of him in waves, making your eyes flutter as you got a whiff of him. — Your mouth opens, you want to say something, you want to confirm that this moment is real, that this is just not a figment of your imagination and that you are actually here, that he’s actually here and that he’s… Him. 

“You smell good.” His voice is gruff, and you can barely make out his dark eyes as he leans down, for his brown hair covers the majority of his flushed face. — You squeal when his lips drag across the juncture of your neck, when his hot tongue presses against your skin. “Like apricots..” He murmurs, as his nose nudging against your collarbone, “But better.” 

He inhales sharply, the groan he emits going straight to your core and you feel a strange wave of desire build in your stomach. It felt weird, though not unpleasant, and certainly not unwelcome. — Still, you shriek when his fingers reach for your orange coat, insistently tugging it from your body. Beomgyu doesn’t even seem to register your bashful exclamation as you try to cover yourself, instead he tugs at your blouse, flicking the first few buttons open as his eyes rake across your warm skin. 

“Fuck”, he grunts and you would be ashamed to admit that the small slip of his tongue made you throb. — “Do you like this?” He asks, his hungry eyes suddenly latching onto yours. Your face was practically on fire as you nodded, and Beomgyu’s smirk grew wide. “I can tell”, he then adds, making you jump as his hand slides up your inner thigh, stopping all the way under your plaid skirt, his fingers inches from the lining of your panties, “You reek of it.” 

“I…” You did not know if that was a compliment or not. But you meekly tried to close your legs, only for Beomgyu to pry them apart again as he pushed your skirt up over your hips. — His breath is warm, much warmer than the fire sparking next to you. It makes your skin flare up as it caresses you. 

“Please”, he murmurs, the words barely audible as his head drops down between your thighs. “I need to taste you, just once.” — You weren’t exactly sure what he meant by that, but the strange flutter rising in your stomach had become almost impossible to ignore and out of sheer desperation you nod, breathing out a small, “yes.” 

Beomgyu doesn’t need to hear it twice. Two of his long fingers slip around the hem of your panties, tugging the garment down your legs, though giving up halfway when his impatience got the better of him. The sound of cotton ripping fills your ears, making you dizzy as he exhales against your bare cunt, nearly panting against it upon eyeing the orange cream that your arousal had built up. 

Your eyes fly open when he first licks a stripe along your core, a surprised moan leaving your lips as you peer down at him. Fingers digging into the plush and peachy couch, you swallow, your gaze training on his brown hair as it buries between your legs, longing to reach out and touch him. — The first, almost hesitant taste he’d gotten only seemed to make him spiral even further and you choke on a small gasp as the bridge of his nose presses against your clit, his tongue dwelling deep inside your cunt as his hands grab at your waist, sliding down your thighs. 

His eyes flutter in ecstasy, the creamy taste of apricots overwhelming his taste buds as the acidic sensation floods him. He quickly realizes that he needs more, and a lot of it. “W-Wait, wait, Beomgyu–” The tingling feeling bubbling within you felt like it was about to implode on you, it made your thighs tremble and your head spin as you fought to stay somewhat composed. 

But it’s like he’s on a different planet, nothing you said mattered when you were so perfectly spread before him, your warm and inviting cunt just waiting for him to completely devour. Your soft whines and silent pleas made his head spin, and he knew he needed more, as much as possible. 

Your head tips back when his fingers suddenly slide between your soaked folds, digging into your quivering cunt as he curls them. — “B-Beomgyu..” His name leaves your lips a mere whimper, though you’re not sure what you’re even asking of him. You want to say something, to convey the heat inside of you, the feelings swirling within your chest and the fierce beating of your heart. But the words get caught in your throat, your eyes screwing shut as pleasurable vibrations course through you. 

Beomgyu moans at the taste of your release on his tongue, greedily lapping up every single droplet of creamy apricot as he tugs you closer. He doesn’t seem to worry about breathing, and his chest heaves dramatically against the couch cushion, his hips stuttering as he shudders. — The feeling of his tongue against your clit suddenly goes from overwhelming to overbearing, and your thighs clamped around his head as your hands push him back. 

“N-No more!” You gasp, your face flushed in all shades orange as you blink fervently. Beomgyu groans when he separates from your cunt, a displeased look flashing across his desire-filled expression. The lower half of his face is coated in a thick layer of something dangerously close to the apricot jam he’d been feasting on for weeks. He blatantly ignores your gawking stare as he wipes the mess from his cheeks, stuffing his fingers into his mouth, his eyes already searching for more as he attempts to spread your legs once more. 

You whine, rubbing your thighs together in embarressment, resisting a shiver as his hand runs across your knee and down your calf. “One more”, he says, and though his voice is masked by a layer of determination, you can still decipher the silent plea as his dark eyes search yours. — Biting the inside of your cheek, you shyly avoid his gaze as you let it wander across his body. 

With a slightly shaky hand you point to the shirt he’s wearing. “T-Take it off..” You murmur, the small sentence nearly inaudible. The uncharacteristic smirk he’d been wearing since your arrival quickly finds its way back to his lips and Beomgyu complies as he tugs the garment over his head, discarding it on the floor as he turns back to you with a look of expectancy. 

Admittedly so, you had been craving a closer look at him since the day you’d first found yourself on his porch. Something about him pulled you in. Perhaps it was the subtle pink flush of his face, one that had intensified right now, making him almost glow. Or it was the soft fuzz that crawled across his skin, it feels ticklish under the tips of your fingers as you trail them along his naked chest. Peach fuzz, you think to yourself with a small smile. — Beomgyu shudders, but bites back another comment as he watches you with dark eyes. 

Your attention flickers to his hair, dark and unkempt. His hair left a lot of questions, some which you had spent more time pondering than you’d like to admit. Your hands card through the surprisingly soft locks, giving them a gentle tug and Beomgyu groans, his head immediately falling forward as he wraps an arm around your waist. 

He pulls you onto his lap in seconds, making you straddle his hips, ignoring the way you wince as your sensitive cunt makes contact with the rough fabric of his pants. — Your gaze drops to the not so subtle bulge straining against the fabric, your hands tentatively palming him through the material, carefully gauging his reaction. 

The strands of his dark hair tickle your neck as he leans forward to press languid kisses along your shoulder. His teeth drag across your skin, and for a moment you thought he might actually try and take a bite out of you. It was like he was trying to merge with you, to envelop you fully, like that was the only way to extinguish the fire burning within. 

He helps you with the zipper, swiftly tugging his hard cock from the confinements of his pants, giving it a few deliberate strokes as he directs kisses to your blazing skin. — You can’t help but eye the way his fingers wrap around his shaft, noting the way he presses his thumb against his slit, shuddering against you as he does. Eager to do the same, you reach out. Beomgyu freezes when your hand joins in on top of his, but makes no move to brush you off. 

Saliva pools in your mouth at the sight of light and pink precum dribbling from his flushed tip, it perfectly matched the flush of his face. Beomgyu chokes on a strained moan when your fingers swipe across his slit, gathering the sticky and sweet substance on your hand as you bring it to the lips. — He tastes sweet, like peaches, ripe and perfectly harvested. You sigh at the euphoric taste, your eyes fluttering as your tongue darts out to lick at the remnants that had spilled down your chin. 

Beomgyu’s throbbing cock twitches at the sight and he doesn’t hesitate as yanks you forward. “Don’t do that”, he breathes, “Please. Don’t do that.” It sounds as if he’s using all his willpower to hold back. You didn’t want him to. You wanted to see him just as he was, every last bit of him, you wanted to see it all, to familiarize yourself with everything that was him.  

“You taste good”, you say, the compliment coming out a little breathless when he presses the tip of his cock against your overstimulated cunt. “Yeah?” He asks, pushing past the tight rim of muscle as he eases his way inside, bringing you back onto his thighs. “You do too.” — His words barely register in your mind, for it’s far too clogged up on the feeling of him, throbbing and alive, inside of you. 

His hands are on your waist again, pulling you forward as he sets you in motion. You gasp at the way he brushes up against every bundle of nerves, soft eyelashes hitting your cheeks as your eyes flutter. — With trembling fingers you reach for his face, you wanted to kiss him again, you wanted it more than anything. In this very moment you felt greedy, selfish almost, your body moving on its own accord as you sought out pleasure. 

You had always considered yourself a selfless person, always giving and giving, never expecting anything in return. It felt strange, you had never desired anything the way you desired Beomgyu right now. The feeling scared you. Was this what Kai had warned you about? Should you have listened. — Even if you wanted to, you don’t think you could ever stop now. It was too much, he was everywhere, all at once. Yet there never seemed to be enough. 

Your lips crash against his with urgency, somehow the kiss turns out sweet. It’s soft, gentle, caring. Beomgyu hums into your mouth, the taste of peaches and apricots mixing with one another. It tastes sweet, refreshing, and exciting. — Your combined moans echo out into the small cottage, the fire burning alongside your already blazing bodies, intensifying the raw and intimate moment. 

Suddenly you know what you’d been longing for all this time, what had been missing in your otherwise mundane but joyful life. Delivering jams wasn’t enough, the warm smiles only eased the loneliness in your heart to an extent. No, this, this was what you needed. Another warm body against yours, someone to devote yourself entirely to, someone who acted without expecting anything in return. You would like to think of Beomgyu that way, even though you know you probably shouldn’t. 

“Fuck, you’re so perfect- I..” Beomgyu cuts himself off as he pulls back from the heated kiss. Sweat slides down his forehead and you lean in to press a small peck between his furrowed brows. His jaw slacks as he lets ragged breaths pass his parted lips, his hips jerking up to meet yours. — Large hands slide down the sides of your trembling thighs, running over the curve of your ass as he squeezes the soft flesh there. 

“D-Don’t know how much longer…I’m..” You stumble over your words, foreheads pressed against one another as small wordless sounds of pleasure rips from your throat. Beomgyu hums, his fingers creeping up your spine, dark gaze trained to your tits, catching the way your perky nipples strained against the cotton of your blouse. — “Fucking perfect.” He grunts, repeating himself over and over, enjoying the way it sounded on his tongue. 

His thumb presses against your clit, rubbing it in gentle motions. The action makes your teeth latch onto your bottom lip as tears prickle in the corner of your eyes. With a small cry you feel your orgasm course through you, your cunt desperately clenching around his cock, pulling a string of curses from Beomgyu as his head tips back, exposing his flushed neck and bobbing adam's apple. 

The peach cream is warm as it sputters from his twitching cock, spreading throughout your belly when he finishes inside of you. It’s unexplainable, the closeness, the intertwinement, you feel almost bound to him in that moment. — His body feels electrifying against yours, the soft fuzz tickling you when he pulls you to his heaving chest. 

It feels idyllic, being so close to him. He doesn’t feel at all like the Beomgyu you had acquainted yourself with. This feels raw, it feels real. The weeks you’d spent carefully peeling the layers back had led you here, a place in which you never would’ve even considered finding yourself in. — And when you peer up at him, you find it hard to ever look away. He looks dazed, half a smirk plastered onto his face as his arms tighten around you. 

You did not know if this had been a mistake or not, you did not know if you would come to regret this the following day. But right now it felt just right, just perfect. — You wish to stay like this, if just a moment longer. 

⸝⸝

You found that Beomgyu liked to sleep in. 

As usual, you had woken along with the sun, rising as the first rays cast upon you. Stretching out with a small yawn, you freeze when your feet hit something hard. Cracking a groggy eye open, you find your toes stubbed against the armrest of a peachy couch. Shaking your head as you blink the sleep away, you glance around. — You were in Beomgyu’s living room. 

Your gaze falls on the fire, it had since long died out, leaving nothing but ashes in its wake. Then onto the discarded basket, tipped over on the floor a few paces away. And then to your bright and orange coat, thrown on the cream colored carpet. — At last, you settle on him. Beomgyu lays sprawled out on the sofa, taking up the vast majority of it as he forces you into a compromised position somewhere between its backrest and him. 

With a small grunt you ease yourself into a sitting slouch, steadying yourself with a hand on his naked chest. The pink flush had gone down, and he no longer looked as if he were on fire. In fact, he looked almost peaceful like this. Blissfully asleep as he takes slow and steady breaths through his slightly parted lips. His eyes move behind closed eyelids, lashes fluttering, as his nose scrunches. 

You reach out before you can even stop yourself, fingers carefully carding through his dark hair. Memories of your previous night together flash before you, replaying themselves in crisp clear quality. You remember his warm hands on you, his fuzzy skin against yours, his lips, the way he tasted, the way he made you feel. — Your body tingles all over at the mere thought. 

Mindlessly your hands wander, not stopping until they reach a peculiar little mark on his ribcage. At first glance, it looked nothing out of the ordinary, and you would have probably brushed it off as a birthmark, had it not been for the way Beomgyu flinched when you pressed against it. — He groans, rolling over on his side, now facing you as his arm wraps around your waist, pulling you to him as his face nuzzles against your stomach. 

“Too early..” He complains, his voice muffled and laced with sleep as his hands clumsily grab at your hips. Pursing your lips, you reach for the mark once more, pressing the tips of your fingers against it. Beomgyu groans as he attempts to swat your hand away, persistently ignoring your advances until you finally speak up. — “What’s that?” 

“Hm?” He raises his head, blinking against the bright sun before his attention shifts to where you’re pointing at. A small scoff passes his lips, his expression morphing into one of recognition and distaste, like you’d just reminded him of something he’d been trying to forget. — “It’s nothing”, he grunts, heaving himself into a sitting position as he stretches. Your eyes trail his figure with far less shame than you would’ve liked to admit. But as they do, you encounter several marks of the same kind. 

“Beomgyu, there’s one here too”, you point to the reddish hue on his forearm. How had you not noticed these yesterday? Then again… Your cheeks flush as you recall the events of last night, quickly shaking your head as you try to rid yourself of such thoughts. — Beomgyu huffs, waving a dismissing hand your way as he tries to brush the topic off. “Don’t they hurt?” You quire, pushing the conversation further. 

Beomgyu sighs, running a sleepy hand through his disheveled and dark hair. “Yeah, sure”, he mutters but doesn’t seem too bothered by the admission. — “Had them for as long as I can remember”, he then adds with a small shrug, “something about peaches bruising easily.” 

You don’t question him on the topic again, he didn’t seem keen on talking about it. And you respected that. Yet you couldn’t help but get lost in thought as your mind pictured the dark spots. Were Kai’s words true? Had Beomgyu himself began rotting?

⸝⸝

You visit Beomgyu the next day, and the day after that, and even the one to come. He doesn't question your sudden appearances. And you no longer have to wait outside his shut front door, for he opens it right away, even if he lets you inside with nothing but a short nod or a small grunt. 

The two of you don’t do much. You drink tea, sometimes you eat biscuits with the jam you brought. Other times he allows you to scour his crowded bookshelves, you use him as your own library, picking a book and returning with it a few days later. — Beomgyu will often sit on the couch, you by the warm fireplace as you ramble on about the book, sharing your thoughts excitedly. Often it felt as if you were conversing with yourself, but you knew that he was listening. You could tell by the way his lip twitched, or the way he rolled his thumbs over one another. 

Neither of you bring up that night, the night where you had.. It’s buried, buried beneath the small talk. Buried beneath the tea and the biscuits, beneath the silence of just enjoying each other’s presence. — Beomgyu never tells you to leave, but you do so anyway. And though your heart yearned to spend another night in his house, you were not so sure that it was a good idea. You had yet to tell anyone about it, not even Blueberry Kai knew. The secret burdened you, in a way. 

Beomgyu never mentioned the bruises again, so you didn’t either. Sometimes you would catch a glimpse of them, when his shirt slid up as he reached for a book on the top shelf, or when he rolled his sleeves up to do the dishes. If he ever caught you staring, he’d make sure to cover himself again. The sight pained you, and you wished there was something you could do. Anything. 

When you weren’t at his house, you spent your days researching, as silly as it might sound. In the short span of a week, you had learned everything there was to know about peaches. From their soft and fuzzy outsides to their pink and creamy insides. You read about growing peaches, about harvesting peaches, you read about which seasons they thrive in and which they don’t. — Safe to say you confidently called yourself an expert. 

Yet there was one peach you couldn’t quite seem to figure out. 

Beomgyu was nothing like the peaches in the books, with the exception of the soft fuzz that coated him and the pink flush of his cheeks whenever he got flustered. And as the night drags on, your tired eyes follow along the written liens on the page before you in a lazy manner. With your head propped on your hand, you stifle yet another yawn as you blink the sleep away. 

No, this wouldn’t do. All answers were not in books, and certainly not answers about Beomgyu. With the quick shake of your head, you slam said book shut, and with newfound determination you rise to your feet. — If you couldn’t ask him about it, then you would simply have to work with what you’ve got; and that was a whole bunch of newfound knowledge on peaches. 

⸝⸝ 

The next morning you leave home before the birds wake. With nothing but a short blink of sleep but energy to feed an army, you march down the cobbled road. You don’t have to look for the small pathway that leads off the main street anymore, your feet take you there on your own, allowing your thoughts to wander as you dwell into the thick forest. 

Beomgyu’s familiar house makes your chest swell, and your pace quickens as you approach. — The knocks you deliver to his door are sharp, demanding and slightly impatient. With the small click of your tongue, you glance around the silent woods, tapping your foot restlessly against the old porch. A minute or so later, the door glides open, and you’re met with a freshly woken peach. 

“Do you know what time it is?” Beomgyu retorts, though his voice lacks its usual bite, he’d stopped using that with you. “It’s almost seven”, you chirp as you brush past him and into his homely living room, having already made yourself more than comfortable within his house. Beomgyu’s protesting groan becomes a faint background noise as you settle the heavy basket you were carrying onto his dining table. 

It’s just now that he seems to notice it, his eyes scouring the items stacked inside, neatly concealed with a plaid blanket. — “What’s the meaning of this?” He mutters as he nears you, his chest brushing against your back as he reaches past you to peel the blanket off. You freeze, swallowing a small gulp as you blink a couple of times. Beomgyu had started doing that.. Being so close, you mean. It was as if the matter of personal space didn’t occur in his mind. Not that you minded, however it reminded you of your night together, and that was something you did mind. 

“Peaches..!” You chime, trying your hardest not to let on to your flustered state. Beomgyu, on the other hand, goes silent behind you. His warm breaths are slow and steady against the back of your neck as his fingers fiddle with the handle of the basket. “What for?” He asks, his voice gruff and unreadable. 

Hesitantly, you reach for one of the smaller bags, holding it up as you show him the tiny seeds inside. “They’re not peaches yet..” You murmur, and you’re thankful that he can’t see your face as it twists in embarrassment. — “I thought we could plant them together”, the proposal comes out a mere whisper, the words getting caught in your throat as you avoid glancing behind you to get his reaction. 

Another eerie silence follows. 

It drags on for nearly a whole minute before Beomgyu finally shifts behind you. “No.” He firmly states, the abrupt refusal washing over you like a bucket of ice cold water. This time you can’t hold yourself back from twisting on the spot, coming face to face with him. — “Why not?” You press, your brows furrowing as you grip the small bag of seeds. 

Beomgyu leans forward, restricting the already confined space between the two of you. The back of your thighs press against the dining table, and you find yourself leaning backward when his nose nudges against your own. — “Because I don’t like peaches.” His expression is painted with distaste, as if the word itself spread a bitter taste on his tongue. However, you refused to back down, and with a small huff you shook your head; shoving him back as you grab the basket and head for the smaller door that leads out into his garden.

The fresh morning air is soothing against your burning skin, still tingling where his warm breath had caressed. You take in a deep breath, savoring the cool air as it slips down into your lungs. As you do, you survey the garden. While it wasn’t in horrible condition, it looked like it had been left unattended for the greater part of its existence. Yet you march forward, finding a nice open patch of grass as you sink to your knees. 

You rummage through the basket in search of the small shovels you’d brought. Then comes the process of tearing up the ground beneath you. It’s a tedious process, but one that you find to quite enjoy. A familiar sensation of calm and peace washes over you as you work just like you would in your own garden; shoveling the soil into a pile next to you. 

The sun is warm against your back as you work, yet its rays don't quite seem to reach the lonesome cottage, for the dark forest surrounding you shuts it out. — Wiping the sweat from your forehead with the back of your hand, you find yourself completely engrossed in the task at hand. Much so that the sound of the door being opened and closed passes you by unnoticed. 

Beomgyu’s steps are heavy as he slowly approaches your hunched over form. You feel his presence before you see it. The way his gaze tears holes through the back of your neck, dark and piercing eyes locked on your every move. He stops a pace away, maintaining a safe distance, as if the seed itself were to jump up and swallow him whole. 

It’s quiet, neither of you saying anything as you let the tense air speak for itself. You can feel him watching you as you shovel more dirt, having made a decent depth to the hole. Briefly, you consider the fact that this might’ve been a mistake, that you had overstepped once and for all, and that this time, he wasn’t just going to brush it off as insistence. — When you reach for the bag of seeds, he suddenly speaks up: 

“Why are you doing this?” 

You hadn't expected him to ask that. Quite frankly you had expected him to drag you away. To shut his door in your face and tell you to never come back. His question makes you waver, fingers hovering above the opening section of the little bag as you freeze mid-action. Why were you doing this? To say pity felt derogatory, for you didn’t think Beomgyu longed for pity, if anything he repelled it. So what was it? 

“Friendship”, you finally say, your hands resuming their work as you shake a few seeds out onto your open palm. “It’s what friends do”, you add as you turn to peer up at him. It was hard to make out his expression, the sun behind him momentarily blinding you. But his scoff is loud and clear, and you catch the way his fingers twitch as he resists the urge to clench them into fists. 

He mutters something under his breath, the words inaudible to your ears. Then he crouches down next to you, the action taking you by surprise. A small, almost unnoticeable smirk is tugged across his lips, it's a strange look on him, one you don’t think you’d ever seen. — “Friendship?” He echoes as he glances toward the bag in your hand. You nod, rolling the seeds on the flat of your palm, “Are we not friends?” 

Beomgyu pulls his bottom lip between his teeth, his gaze trained on something beyond your line of sight as he peers out and ahead. “I don’t know..”, he murmurs, his eyes briefly dropping to his own hands, splayed out in front of him. — “I don’t think I’ve ever had a friend.” The admission is followed by the soft flush of his neck and cheeks, the light pink radiating on his skin. 

His words make your chest tighten, the corners of your lips falling as your face drops. Never had a friend? You’d always assumed that Peach Beomgyu liked it better that way. Perhaps not, perhaps he was just as lonely as he looked right now. — Placing the bag of seeds down, you reach over, clasping his hand in yours. The small seeds linger within your intertwined palms, enveloped in the warmth simmering between you.  

Beomgyu’s brow twitches, his dark eyes lifting as they lock with yours, a silent question lingering within them. — “I can be your first friend”, you smile, even though your stomach is fluttering with nerves. He looks slightly taken aback, like he hadn’t expected for those to be the words to come out of your mouth. His lips part, only for him to close them soon again, silently nodding. 

Your heart was practically ablaze. 

Only when his hand squeezes around yours do you seem to remember yourself as you shake your head. “Right”, you say as you point to the little hole you had dug, “Let’s plant these!” — Beomgyu seems hesitant at first, his eyes flickering between your intertwined fingers and the soil patch. Still, he reluctantly gives in as he lets you guide your joint hands toward the hole. 

You make sure to gently pat the little seeds in, taking a moment to lean back and admire them before motioning for Beomgyu to cover them with dirt. He complies, gingerly scooping some into his palms as he covers the hole back up. Together you flatten it out, your hands bumping into one another as you do. It’s impossible to ignore the way his fingers flare up in pink whenever they touch yours, and you smile at the discovery. 

When you’re finally done, you lean back up, placing your hands on your knees as you regard the small patch with pursed lips. “Now we wait”, you huff, realizing that even with the help of Beomgyu it would take a good couple of months before these were even close to being done. To wait and for so long for something was awfully boring. 

With a reclined sigh, you begin collecting the tools you’d used, shoving them back into the basket. Beomgyu had gone awfully quiet next to you, quiet even for him. You pay it no mind, far too busy with re-organizing yourself. It’s not until his warm fingers suddenly grasp your chin, his touch feathery light yet scorching hot, that you react. 

Your wide eyes barely manage to meet his upon turning your head before his lips press against yours. The sudden kiss takes you by surprise and you blink a couple of times before allowing your shocked eyes to fall shut. — It didn’t feel like it had that night, this was slow, timid almost, and Beomgyu was far more hesitant this time around as his hand went to your waist. It was cute, you thought. 

And when he finally pulls back, there’s a warm pink covering the entirety of his face as he clears his throat into his closed fist. “Do..” He begins, quickly trailing off as he avoids your gaze. “I mean, is that something friends do?” — You frown, mouth opening and closing as you think of an answer. 

“I don’t…I don’t think so. I think it’s something that more-than-friends do…”, you shyly admit, watching as the color that had just begun fading off of his face resurfaced once more. — Beomgyu grunts, shaking his head once, as if banishing the embarrassment from his mind, his dark hair falling in uneven sections in front of his eyes. “Then..”, he puts on a more stoic expression but you catch the nervous fidget of his fingers as they play with a strand of grass, “Then I want to be ‘more-than-friends’ with you.” — “If…If that’s okay?” He quickly adds, his face falling for a brief moment. 

You can only nod, a grin stretching across your lips so wide that the corners of your mouth hurt. “I would like that very much.” — Beomgyu exhales a heavy sigh of relief, his shoulders slumping slightly as he peers at you through dark strands of hair. You awkwardly clear your throat, feeling your own face heat up at the request you were about to make: 

“Can you…do that again? The kiss I mean..” 

He chuckles, and you think it was the first time you ever heard him even remotely laugh. — “Without a doubt.” 

⸝⸝

Things became different with Beomgyu after that. But it was a good different. It was different because he had started coming to you. — It had shocked you at first, when he’d knocked on your door, and you had opened it, expecting anyone but him. Even more so when he’d willingly accompanied you into town. Though he didn’t say much, he still followed along as you browsed the different stands, humming a quiet yes to whatever you found interesting. 

People cast glances your way, but he didn’t seem to care for them. And neither did you, for the warm feeling of your hand in his washed away any other thoughts. — He even met Blueberry Kai once, though their first meeting was stiff and beyond tense, you couldn’t help the way your chest swelled at the accomplishment. 

Beomgyu was polite, at least when he wanted to be. He stopped to hold the door for others, picked up a lost purse and returned it to its owner, and he carried your basket when it became too heavy. After a while he started accompanying you when you went out to deliver jams, and the faces of others as they opened the door soon grew from shock to recognition as Beomgyu slowly made his way back into society. 

Still, you preferred to spend quiet and lazy days at his house. Away from everyone else, just the two of you, basked in a different kind of tranquility. Sharing soft kisses on the couch, long mornings in bed, reading out in the garden, and having tea in the kitchen. — It was a simple life, a life that had been right under your nose all along. 

And the peaches soon bloomed, much to everyone’s surprise. The first ripe fruits, hanging off the tree, pink and plump. Beomgyu watches as you reach for one, plucking it from its branch as you turn it in your hands. — “Perfect, no?” You say as you let your fingers glide over the familiar fuzz covering the fruit. 

Beomgyu hums as he, too, reaches for one. The shirt he wore rides up his stomach, exposing his flushed skin to you. But there were no bruises this time, they had faded months ago. And none of you questioned it, though you were certain you knew why. — Beomgyu brings the peach to his nose, inhaling its sweet scent as his eyes flutter. A small smile splayed across his face, that was also something different. 

Your gaze lingers on his frame just a moment longer, fixated on the dark hair on top of his head. Only… It wasn’t dark, not anymore. — You reach up to card your hand through his soft locks, fingers catching one a strand by the very top. You run it between your thumb and index finger, its peachy color glowing under the sun. 

To think that a little bit of love was all someone like him needed to bloom. 

It was a funny thought indeed.

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