#benjamincarminekin

[fictionkinfessions]

cw homophobia, roleplay (idk if that needs a cw but I put one in just in case)

trying not to cry rn. I was talking to a person off-site who was roleplaying as Marcus Fenix from Gears of War and they said, well, you can guess from one of the cws. I don’t want to type it. It should just be an “oh you’re mean” situation but the fact that I knew Marcus when I lived as Ben (and what makes it a whole lot worse is that I remember being mlm and ace, and I’m still that way now) makes me feel very upset. Like the Marcus I knew probably wouldn’t say that to me, but what if I’m wrong? Would he? And then I’m reminded that my brothers were super accepting when I came out and now I miss them even more. Everything just feels awful right now.

-Benjamin Carmine, Gears of War

placeholder text because tumblr wont let me post ask messages without something in the reply box

[fictionkinfessions]

I know I’m gonna sound stupid for this and idk if I’m using the ask box properly but. I feel sort of ashamed about two things that have to do with two of my kintypes. Firstly, there’s the fact that I can’t swim (I’ve had three near-drowning incidents and one where I almost got stuck too far out in the water on a bodyboard at the beach), and I also happen to kin Percy Jackson. It’s funny if I don’t think about it too much, but it still makes me feel like I’m failing in a way. Also I freak out too easily with bugs. Even if it’s just in a video game or book. I think that might be because of how I died as Benjamin Carmine, but I still feel mad at myself because I can’t even play any game or watch any movie with a giant bug-like thing without panicking upon seeing it.

x

[fictionkinfessions]

weapons cw answering the canon takeout ask game! Out of everything I could have I think I’d choose either my pen sword aka Riptide I had as Percy (PJO), seriously that was the one of the coolest things I’ve ever had (also because I lose writing utensils all the time and it always went back in my pocket if I lost it); or my COG armor as Benjamin Carmine (Gears of War), specifically because I really want to wear my helmet again

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