#ben solo x reader headcanon
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The Supreme Empress
Kylo Ren x Reader
Summary: The dark side chose you. They pried you out of the rebel camps and dragged you from the ashes and the corpses of your family. The dark side chose you to strengthen the force, to be the vessel for their plans, to be the bride of the Supreme Leader's pupil, to bear Kylo Ren's seed and ensure the might of their divine wrath.
Word Count: 11k+ 🧍♀️💀
Warnings: fem!Reader, slow burn, forced marriage AU, themes of stockholm syndrome/gaslighting/brain washing, mentions/depictions of violence, enemies to lovers?, smut (scratching, marking, ?manipulating?, fingering, vaginal penetration, cock warming), fluff, angst, typos, etc.
A/N: this fucking ai chat man. fuck that shit MINORS DNI honestly. its my fault for making a plot. i just wanted to write smut fml. i hate it here. i couldn't even finish it cos now i cant write the smut dafaq? anyway im sure i got typos so you must forgive me. i have not gone through this yet and i need to brush my teeth and pull myself together bye Tagging: @pinksirensong @aralezinspace @sloanexx
I fell to my knees. I was in tears, in dust, in blood, and in pain. My wrists were bound behind me and my clothes were tattered and torn.
This was it. This was the day I die. I felt it in my bones. This was the reckoning.
And then my deliverer, my executioner, came before me. And then I felt the Force in him echo in the room and ripple through me like a blade through my chest.
It was him. The phantom that haunted me every time I closed my eyes. He was the nightmare in my sleep, and the damning voice in my head in the morning. The dark warrior, death given form, the murmuring voice of the shadows.
The Sith Lord.
Here he is, crossing this bridge from the entrance of this cursed compound.
The place is busy, busy with its plans of destruction. I heave at the grandness of it all. It was terrifying to see it up close, especially since I was evidently at the top, and it was a very long drop down.
I crane my neck up at him, face stained with tears. I was exhausted but I put on my last show. I bared my last look of defiance before he kills me, before he finally completes this cycle of torment he has been inflicting onto me.
I close my eyes and await his judgement.
I feel him come before me, but he instead walks past, and I hear someone choke from behind.
"Did I not instruct that she be left unharmed?" his voice barks through his dark mask.
My heart pounds as I hear straining from behind me. I steal a look from over my shoulder and instantly regret it when I see the two stormtroopers that dragged me here get thrown down the side of the bridge. I shudder. Like I said, it's a long drop down.
I look straight when he returns to me. I feel him undo my shackles with his Force, and then... he clutches my arm to help me stand.
I look up at him. I see my reflection on his helmet. I clench my jaw, "what do you want from me?"
"My empress-"
My stomach rolls.
"-I have finally retrieved you from your sullied camp to bring you to your rightful place next to me. To claim you as my own."
A shiver runs down my spine.
No, this can't be real.
My breathing strains. I grip my hands and I begin to step back.
It electrocutes me, this searing cold voice in my brain. It was a suddenly as if I remembered the dialogue in the horrors of my slumber that I so hardly tried to suppress. It was replaying now, the voice of the malevolent, the voice of the creature ruling my nightmares. "I give you to my pupil. With your Force converged with his, the purest of warriors will be borne. And my power will know no bounds."
"You remember now, bride," my captor iterated, "that voice in your head right now-- that is the Supreme Leader; that is Snoke."
I step back, "bride?" my breath hitches.
I was his b--
My knees almost give in, but again, his hold on my arm keeps me upright.
I feel my eyes begin to water.
Please, please, let this be another horrible, horrible nightmare.
"Is everything prepared?"
"Yes, my lord," two voices call out from behind me.
"Good," he says, and I released, "I will watch as you prepare her. I will not allow her be injured further."
I was--
I was here to be sacrificed to the darkness.
I was here to answer to the calls that have been plaguing me for so long, ever since that day my home planet was invaded, ever since everything I knew was reduced to atoms.
I let out a loud yelp when I am splashed with cold water. I let out a breathy curse and the servant who had done it, who had profusely apologized, is suddenly being choked.
It is only now I am cognizant again. It was now that I was aware I am in the bathroom, stripped naked in a tub, and my captor has his servant in a chokehold from across the room. I gasp and cover my bare chest, looking over my shoulder as he hisses, "you could not have made the water warmer? How would you like to be dunked in a pool of ice water?"
My breath hitches, "let her go!"
His voice buzzes behind his helmet as he curls his hand further with his outstretched arm, "she has one task, one simple task, and if she cannot perform it, then she is no use to me."
I panic as I see the servant's eyes water. I jolt when the other servant grabs my shoulder and begins to wash my skin as though nothing was awry. I turn from the servant back to him, "LET HER GO!"
He does nothing.
"LET. HER. GO!"
He seems to be debating my words.
I panic and quip breathlessly, "let her go!"
I sigh in relief when the servant is dropped.
A shiver runs down my spine when he goes at ease by the door. He clutches his hands before him and announces, "thank your empress for her mercy."
Immediately, before she can even catch her breath, the servant responds, "th-ank you, empress." The woman quickly begins to attend to me again.
I am far beyond perturbed.
I don't know what to do with myself, not when I was being bathed by strangers, not when I naked in the tub, not when he was there, watching me.
Why the fuck did that sicko have to watch like a bird in a fucking cage?
Careful, bride.
I stiffen in my place. The servants working on my body halt their work and ask me if their touch was too rough.
Lest you forget I have also been in your dreams. You ought to honor me even in your thoughts, baby bird.
"... my empress?" one servant calls.
"She is fine," he answers for me, "you may proceed."
And then, I'm being dragged out of the tub and patted down in front of a huge mirror. I don't know what to cover, and I can feel him looking. Never mind my naked form in and of itself, but my cuts and bruises from ripping and screaming at the stormtroopers that pried me into their ship. It was loathsome sight to see.
"Must you watch me?" I ask accusingly yet under my breath.
"Yes," he replies, as if it makes anything better, as if it was actually a question, as if he didn't know what I meant with my words. And then he clarifies, as if it helped, "your physical state does not bother me. It does not make you any less than you are, my bride."
My eyes twitch as I am finally handed undergarments to wear. I find my voice again, finally, "that's not the-"
"My pretty bride."
I cease my movements. What the fuck is he saying?
I don't have time to ponder those words as the servants urge me to dress and then quickly begin to fasten me with bandages, namely on my thigh where I had a cut and on my bicep that had a burn.
And though I so badly wanted to whine in protest and dramatic spite, I do my best to contain them. After all, the servants were helping me, they don't need to be Force choked for doing a job they were tasked to accomplish by their malignant master.
The next moment, I was being put into an elaborate garment and then they started painting on my face. Suddenly, I was.... turning into something else. I looked at the mirror and everything was so very real and unimaginable all at once. This was all happening to me. This wasn't a nightmare, not a fever dream, and there was no escape.
And then they told him- my groom- that I was done and I stared at my reflection, unable to recognize myself.
Who in the world were you?
"Come," he says, raising his hand up to me, "we must not delay any further."
I look at his reflection from the mirror. I look at his hand, hid behind his glove, his body, hid behind his cloak, and his face, hid behind his mask. I was going to me wed to this stranger, hidden in darkness?
I stare at him. I clench my jaw. I tell him I'm not going but utter not a single word. I sear it in his brain with my eyes. I scream it, blare it out as loudly as I could.
And yet he only watches me. He watches me with an urging dark hand.
My heart pounds in my ribs. I expect him to begin to lash out at one point, to choke me next, but he doesn't. He stands there, just stands there, reaching out to me.
Was this his twisted way of making me feel like I was willingly going to him? His way of telling me he was the only route in my life now?
My nostrils flare and I gather my skirt. I stare at him as I walk past him. My body was rigid and I had no idea where I was going, but I walked. And then he opened the doors for me.
My hand twitched when he took it, as he was suddenly beside me. I gasp at the unexpected and uninvited touch and I turn to him in surprise, but it is arduous with this ridiculous headpiece on me. His hand is massive and burning hot against my freezing clammy one. He tugs me toward him, "it's this way."
So, we when go this way.
We tread the halls, and I swear I could feel people following after us, more and more each moment, but I couldn't look back, literally, the fucking headpiece was in the way.
And then the atmosphere started to get darker, and it was like it was suddenly so much harder to breathe. It was clear to me we were heading for that large door, and that whatever was behind there was not good. It was not good at all.
He waved his hands once and the doors opened.
There was a great and terrible rush of Force that knocked into me. It was so strong and terrifying, I tighten my grip on my captor, and I cling onto him for safety. My breath is knocked out of my lungs, and all at once I am facing this large entity, this massive body of darkness, the literal flesh form of all my worst nightmares.
I was reeling back in fear. My stomach was in my chest and my heart was in my mouth.
I was in front of him. The Supreme Leader. Snoke.
And he was looking at me, looking right at me with contempt, with impatience, with exasperation.
My feet were stuck on the floor and my fingers were digging into arm of the man by my side. I couldn't do anything but feel my eyes water.
I snap to look my side when my name is called out. I turn to my groom as suddenly he is pacifying me, comforting me even, "the sooner we get this done, the sooner we can leave."
I don't know how I feel about his words, I don't know how I feel about how he takes my chin in his fingers and makes me turn my body to him. I don't know how I feel when he steadies my stupid headpiece when it knocks onto his shoulder. I don't know how I feel when I follow him mindlessly, when he and I head towards his gargantuan master.
Snoke speaks the moment we are in front of him. His voice rings, it reverberates, in the hall, in my ears, in my thorax, and in the dark corner of my mind that shudders at the recognition, "you have done well, my pupil. Very well."
My eyes lock with Snoke. I evade his stare and abruptly pull away from the man on my right. He stares at me for a moment when I do so, then looks back at Snoke, "thank you, master."
Snoke grumbles, "well, remove that ridiculous thing on your head and let us begin."
I don't know whether it is because I am fearful of the evil-king before me or because I am anticipative of the face of the man behind the mask, but I turn to him with a desperation. I turn to him when he removes his helmet and my breath catches in my throat.
He tucks his helmet under his arm and looks at me with his brown eyes that glistened with something sinister behind them. He parted his lips and I noticed the scar by its side that started by his brow went far past his cheek and collar. His hair was somehow perfectly tousled even after staying inside his face cage for so long. I don't know how I felt after seeing him face to face like this.
I suck in a sharp breath when he takes my hand. He promptly begins to speak.
"I-" he turns to our joined hands as he lifts them chest level, "Kylo Ren," his eyes dart back to me, "take you-"
My skin pricks at how he whispers my name. He says it as if it were a secret, as if he meant it with reverence, as if it was solemn.
"-to be my wife."
My empress.
I suck in a sharp breath at his voice in my head. My breath picks up. My stomach rolls. Get out.
Kylo Ren rubs my knuckles, "To protect you, to honor you, to venerate you until my last breath, or even beyond."
And then he looks at me. He stares at me. He bores into my being and plunges into my soul. I feel my hands begin to shake in his hold.
Kylo Ren looks in silence and I look in fear.
I start at the harsh call of the Supreme Leader to our side, "SPEAK YOUR VOWS, GIRL!"
I screw my eyes shut and gulp. I have to get out of here. Get me out of here! My breath strains now more than ever.
Suddenly, I hear a soft voice in my head. Suddenly, I dare to open my eyes and I see a disconcerting softness in my groom's expression.
Shhhhhhh.
He hushes me in my mind. He repeats his words from earlier.
The sooner we get this done, the sooner we can leave.
I open my mouth and huff helplessly. I repeat my groom's words and tears begin to fall from my eyes.
Snoke leans back in his throne and tents his hands together, "good, good. Then by the power of the darkness, the power vested in me, The Supreme Leader, the ruler of the galaxies and all peoples," he nods his head, "two have now become one."
My shoulders rise and my heart pounds at the explosion of loud exclamations. I look around the hall and only now realize that there were hundreds of individuals, looking down at us from the balconies above.
"Long live the Emperor and Empress!"
I am at a loss for what to do next. I don't know if I want to run away or drop dead. I find myself looking to Kylo Ren. Kylo Ren, whose brows slightly furrow in his seriousness. Kylo Ren who looks up to his people and raises his hand that is clutching his helm, inspiring them to cheer even more. Kylo Ren, who then looks down at me and firmly grips my hands before leading me out of the room.
I don't know what happens after that.
I think I'm having a panic attack.
Am I having a panic attack?
Can someone even think if they're having a panic attack?
I'm not having a panic attack.
I'm not having a panic attack.
"Enough," he speaks, turning to me, clutching my cheek. Kylo Ren looks at me with knit brows while his gloved hands make me face him. My neck strains because of the weight of my headpiece. He blinks at me and slips the thing off my head. A weight is lifted off my shoulders. Very suddenly, I think I'd have preferred if he removed my head altogether. He uses his Force to bring the object away. I watch as it floats off to a dresser, beside his helmet that was already there.
All at once, I realize I was in a bedroom. I look back at Kylo in horror. Oh, fuck, I was in a bedroom.
He huffs through his nostrils, "your thoughts are as loud as sirens."
I clutch my skirt tightly and slowly begin to move back.
Kylo watches me. He tilts his head down slightly and narrows his eyes.
I swallow the lump in my throat, "so what?" I shudder, "you're going to force an heir in me now?"
He raises his nose and tilts his head to the side, "it is my duty to sire an heir."
I gulp. My breathing begins to get shorter and shorter.
I start when he steps forward. I put more distance between us.
I shiver when he calls out my name.
"Don't," I point, "don't come any closer."
Kylo Ren offers me the courtesy of stopping in his place.
I catch my breath and watch him as he brings his hands behind him. Goosebumps form on my skin when he speaks, "I have just vowed to protect you, to honor you, and to venerate you." He brings his hands to the clasp of his cloak, "I will not force you to do anything with me that you don't want."
I scoff, tightening my grip on my clothes, "and you think I wanted to marry you?!"
I tense when Kylo unfastens his cloak and folds it in front of him. I freeze in my spot in anticipation of what he's going to do next. He looks at his cloak then looks at me, "you do not understand it now, but you are the key to securing the strength the Sith, securing the Order."
A shiver runs down my spine. How can he say that so plainly?
I cannot comprehend how utterly indoctrinated this ideation is in his being. It is shocking honestly, to see up close and personal that he believes so much in his cause, that he genuinely does not see fault in this, in forcing me to marry him, in taking me by force, in destroying my camp, in laying waste to my people, on wreaking their ill-judgement to the stars.
I shake my head, "do you honestly believe I will eventually come to you with- with open arms?!"
Kylo Ren straightens his posture. I nearly trip when he walks over to me as I attempt to rush back. He raises two fingers and keeps me upright with his Force. He keeps me in place and stands before me. He leans his face close to mine, then barely opens his mouth to speak, "I do."
And then, he releases me and walks away.
I watch him as he exits the room and leaves me. The sound of the door closing is all that's left.
I begin to pant. I begin to heave in anger, in loss, in panic, in desperation. I have to get o-
I slap my hands on my mouth. I screw my eyes shut and shudder.
Silent. I have to be silent.
The next day he asked me to accompany him while he ate.
Breakfast, lunch, and dinner, he said, I should join him, so that we would both grow accustomed to each other's company during such intimate moments, and that we would also get to know each other more.
I scoffed at the idea, so much for not forcing me to do anything I don't want.
"I am not forcing you, wife," Kylo calls across the expanse of the long table.
My eyes that were idly watching my fork swirl the unknown delicacy on my plate dart to him. My shoulders tense as Kylo Ren grabs his glass and drinks from it.
I huff, "do you mind getting out of my head?" I ask though it wasn't really a question, it was a threat, as much of a threat a captive could give.
Kylo sets the object down and taps his finger on it, "if you don't want to join me..." he thinks for a moment, "you don't have to."
I straighten in my seat. I silently look out to him in challenge.
I stiffen when the pitcher begins to float and water is then poured in my cup. I clench my jaw, turning back to Kylo, finding his raised finger.
"I would prefer if you dined with me though," he says, putting the pitched back down.
I turn to my food, idly pushing it around again, "I would prefer if I dined by myself... in my-" our "-room."
I hear him exhale. I hear the contact of his cutlery on his plate, "a disappointing conclusion."
I slowly avert my eyes from my food to him. He is now focused on his own plate. He mumbles, "but I will allow it."
The next day, I am woken to eat breakfast and urged to get out of bed. I explain to servant I was allowed to eat in my room and that I don't want to eat yet. I scoff in disbelief when I am told I am meant to tour the place with the master, with that damned Kylo Ren, and is thus advised to get ready.
And so I did. I got ready and went into the dining room and interrupted his breakfast. If I can't have peace, neither can he.
Kylo turns to me and nods, "wife."
I clench my teeth, "tour me now," I huff, "I'm not hungry, so tour me now."
He turns back to his food and seemingly debates my words for a moment. He then stands from his seat and puts on his helmet, leading me out of the room. If I could burn holes onto his back with my eyes, he'd have been nothing but charcoal.
I suppose I should have given more attention to his tour than I did because knowing the place would surely benefit me when I make my attempt to esc-
"Are you certain you're not hungry?" Kylo Ren asks out of the blue as he leads me down the weapons room, "you're quite snippy and demanding. I would assume that's because you're hungry, baby bird."
I can't help but scoff at his mockery, "or, this is just how I am," I mumble, "so don't act like you know me." I aimlessly look at all the weapons on display, weapons meant to destroy others like me.
But I do know you.
I avert my gaze to him. I stiffen as I glare.
"I have been in your mind and seen the depths of your soul," he mutters, "and I know you're irritable because you're hungry."
And then he conjures up a tin-wrapped object in front of me.
"Here," he gives me the item using his Force, "you can eat this while we walk back to our chambers."
My lips curl in disgust, "is this meant to be enticing?"
He tilts his helmet clad head, "it's meant to be my lunch for later," he grabs the floating object, then my wrist, placing the silver thing on my palm.
I tense in his touch and I am glad he doesn't linger long there. I look at his would-have-been lunch then turn back to him, seeing my scowling reflection on his dumb helmet, "what an honor to know I won't be poisoned since this is apparently yours."
"It is mine," he rebuts rather impatiently.
I roll my eyes and shove it into his chest, "if you want me to be less irritable, let me go back to my chambers." I catch myself when I say this. It sounds like I want to be in that damned cage, instead of outside of this compound. I correct myself, "or better yet, let me go."
Kylo Ren places his lunch in pocket that I didn't know he had, "We will continue this tour tomorrow."
And so we did. This time, he made sure to have someone come to me after I ate.
I must say, perhaps he was partially correct in the fact I was irritable because I was hungry. I did find him more bearable today, as far as forced husbands and captors go. But then again perhaps it was because he was touring me in the biggest library I have ever seen.
I couldn't even feign disinterest as he motioned to each area of the place and explained they were arranged by planet of origin.
I was far too busy craning my neck up to see how high the bookshelves reached that I bump into one. Or at least I thought it was a bookshelf and not fucking Kylo Ren. I jolt when I look at him, firstly because we had a collision, secondly because he magically didn't have his helmet on anymore.
I reel back as he looks down at me, on I think a more figurative sense if anything.
I am immediately uncomfortable under his gaze. I mutter, "sorry."
"You have questions," he mutters. He turns to me and lifts his chin, "ask them."
I evade his stare. Don't tell me what to do.
"I'm not telling you what to do," Kylo Ren retorts after hearing my thought.
I turn back to him. I snort and grumble, "stay out of my head."
He looks up at the shelves and then looks down at me with his eyes, "a hundred layers."
I pull my head back and scoff in disbelief, "the shelves have a hundred layers?" I look over my shoulder haphazardly, "seems unnecessary hard to manage."
"Well," he brings his head down, "it hosts knowledge from peoples across over the stars. It must be capable of securing the vastness."
When I look back at him, I tense when I see he has come far too close to me. It would have been wise to pull away, perhaps to even shove him off to get my point across, but somehow, I find his proximity as a challenge. I grit my teeth and narrow my eyes at him, "undoubtedly stolen, plucked from the rubble of your destruction."
A chill rushes up my spine when he smirks at me. It remains lopsided and smug as he whispers "I don't feel the need to preserve artifacts from a race that is unable to see the glory of my purpose."
That's it. I begin to slowly step away from him.
"Do you want to know how these shelves are managed?"
"No, I really-"
I make a sound when he grabs me and locks me against his chest. Before I can even begin to fight back, I find my feet get lifted off the ground along with him. Next thing I know, I'm gasping and clinging onto him for dear life.
"Put me down," I gasp against his chest as I seal my arm tightly against him.
He chuckles as we continue to float up. He tightens his grip on me as I feel myself begin to slip. He flexes his feet and pushes them beneath mine. I look up at him as I step on his boots.
"This is how you manage them," he iterated, then motioning to his side, "or you use the ladder."
I scoff in disbelief, grabbing onto his collar, "put me down, Kylo."
He blinks at me, lips curing into a bigger smile, "alright."
He slowly bringing me down and I tense when he clutches my waist and speaks out my name.
I look away from him and watch as the floor nears. By the time it was close enough, I jump off him and walk away.
Kylo Ren watches and chuckles, "the exit is the other, baby bird."
I stop in my tracks and glare at him. He does not waste time and walks up to me. My breath hitches when he does, reeling over the look on his face. He moves past me and walks away.
I watch him as he does so, and then an idea strikes me. I debate my chances on living here and convincing the servants to get me food... a bucket-
"Don't be ridiculous. I will throw you over my shoulder if you will not follow," Kylo Ren announces. He stops in his tracks and looks over to me, "you are my empress, not my captive, even though you feel that way."
I watch him as he raises his hand to me, reaching out to me again like on the day of our wedding, except this time, I could see his eyes and is pouty lips. I huff through my nostrils and grip my fists. I walk over to him glaring at him all the way until I move past him.
Kylo watches, a glint in his eye as he does.
I hear him chuckle.
The next day, I woke up, realizing I was allowed to sleep in. That got me tremendously excited, and so I quickly began to ready myself to begin my attempts at an esca-
I slap my hand on my mouth and release a deep breath from my nostrils.
I take a few more moments and ready to exit my chambers.
The moment I'm about to exit though, I am faced with a servant. I tense at the sight of her but offer her a pinched smile, "Rezba."
Rezba nods and walks in with a tray of food, "please eat before you leave. I will be scolded if I am found to failed to feed you."
Dammit, Rezba.
I sigh, turning to my feet. I watch the woman as she walks off and sets the table. She was one of the servants that helped prepare me on my... wedding day, the one that didn't get choked. As for the one that was, I have not seen or heard from her ever since.
My conscience presses on me every time I think of this. I sigh, walking over to her. I sit down on the chair by the table and smile, "thank you, Rezba. You can go now."
Rezba nods, "as you wish, empress."
I wipe my face as he walked away. I quickly stuff my face with the food. I mean, after all, if I manage what I do, I'll need all the food I can get.
The moment I was done, I exit my chambers and head outside with purpose. I nod at the personnel that greet me and make sure to keep my mask of confidence as I make it to the launch pad.
I practically beam when I see a ship ready for the picking. But then I feel a force surge through me.
"Fuck."
My bride.
I turn over my shoulder in horror. Lo behold, the dark mask of my groom, strutting over to me with troops behind him.
"Come to visit me?" he muffles out behind his helmet.
I clench my jaw and turn to him, doing my best not to roll my eyes.
Somehow, I can see his smirk underneath as he speaks, "you didn't even change out of your nightclothes."
I let out a strangled sound as I turn to the two people behind Kylo. One had red hair and one was as clad in uniform as the Supreme Lord.
"This is General Hux and Captain Phasma," Kylo motions to the two of them.
I hum, "yes... hello," I smile without meeting my eyes, "well, now that I've... seen my husband, I'm... I'm going back to my chambers."
The two behind Kylo nod at me. I try not be so annoyed as I walk away.
Next time you plan to escape, you should probably change into something that would protect you from the harshness of space.
I grit my teeth and snap over my shoulder, "GET OUT OF MY HEAD!"
General Hux recoils at my voice. Kylo Ren chuckles under his breath.
The next day, I have no such luck of escaping at all.
"Don't you have some-" I quip over my shoulder as Kylo tails me like the dark shadow he was, "-I don't know... planet to blow up," my voice gets increasingly smaller as I say this and hear myself.
Kylo Ren, in one of the rare occurrences he did not have his helmet on, stops to look at me. He presses his lips together, "do you have a pla-"
"No!" I raise hands, "forget that I said that... please."
I turn away from him and begin to tread deeper into the halls of the library.
I hear him snort behind me, "I don't want you to continue to delude yourself into thinking escaping is an option. It would just be a waste of both our time if you do so."
I roll my eyes and shake my head, "and I don't want to delude you in thinking that I would ever stop trying to escape you."
I actually stop in my tracks when I hear him laugh out loud. I turn over to him in great offence as he then turns to me with bright eyes.
I seethe with venom, "I'm glad one of us finds this funny."
He straightens himself up and crosses his arms, "it's funny how you fail to see how alike we are."
My face drops in horror. I march over to him and point a finger at him, "we are nothing alike!"
I jolt when he grabs my wrist and pushes my hand down. The amusement in his face falters and shifts into something else, "aren't we, my empress?"
My heart begins to pound. I pull away from him and recoil.
My breathing begins to pick up as I rub my wrist.
Kylo watches me and makes up for the space between us by walking forward, "did that hurt you?"
"Does it matter if it did?" I quip.
His face softens yet his brows tighten, "it does."
I scoff.
"I am not the monster you make me out to be."
I scoff again as I continue to walk back, "oh yeah, then what ar-" I gasp when I hit something. I panic and turn, seeing it was the step ladder. I have no choice but to halt as Kylo presses nearer. I swallow the lump on my throat as I look at his face.
I will myself not to be so affected by his presence.
I clench my jaw.
My willpower is not very effective.
"I am your husband," he mutters.
I freeze when he brings his hands to my side, though he does not touch me. His eyes dart to my hands that I clutch to my chest. He releases a breath, "I want to bring order to the galaxy."
A shiver runs down my spine, "Kylo..."
His eyes lock on mine. I even my breathing.
I shake my head and knit my brows, "do you genuinely think," I speak softly with no hint of malice, "that killing billions is order?"
His jaw tightens. He drops his hands to his side, "it is an necessary stake for the greater good-"
"Greater good?!" I quip under my breath, grabbing onto his cheeks. I look at him with wide eyes as he looks at me with a similar shocked expression, "you believe razing through the stars is the greater good?"
My whole body pricks when he takes my wrists in his hands and whispers, "my love."
I suck in a sharp breath.
"You do not understand it now," he explains, shaking his head, "but everything that I am, everything that I do," his voice becomes really quiet, "is for us."
My expression drops where his softens.
"For our future," he whispers, "for our next generation and after."
"Kylo-"
"I do it because I believe in our cause," he cuts me off, "I do it because without us, the galaxy will never know anything but chaos."
My breath begins to strain.
He releases one wrist and reaches out for my face, "I will do all it takes, and give you all the time to understand this."
Mu face burns at the feel of his gloved hand. I shake my head, "why?"
"Because you are my star, my burning destiny," he mutters, "the Force brought you to me. I felt you that day on your home planet, you were so strong, you were so strong and so misguided. I tried to kill you that day, but you got away."
My eyes begin to water. I begin to relive that day in my head.
"Then I dreamt about you, I dreamt about how you escaped me and how I hated that you did. Snoke saw it. He saw you in my head. He saw your drive. He saw your weakness. He saw what you could become. And then, he said I burned because you were meant to be mine. He said our Forces were calling for each other, which was why I could not stop dreaming about you."
I begin to tremble against him.
He clutches my face with both hands, "don't be afraid. It took me a while to understand it as well, but-"
"Kylo-" I shudder, "you don't dream of me because I'm your bride, you dream of me because of him!"
He stills.
"Don't you see?" I pant, "he's manipulating you. The dark side is mani-"
"If anyone has been manipulated, it is you, baby bird," he grunts, "you were indoctrinated with beliefs that are short sighted and weak. I would not-"
He doesn't finish and turns his head to the side when a voice of a stormtrooper buzzes through the hall, "apologies for the interruption, my lord. I was tasked to escort you to the throne room, the Supreme Leader is summoning you."
Kylo Ren turns to face him. I suck in a breath as suddenly, he grabs my hand and pulls me with him as we walk past the stormtrooper, "an escort won't be necessary."
If I wasn't shaking a while ago, I surely was now, and Kylo Ren could feel it. Kylo stole looks over his shoulder. I did nothing but try to even my breath as we tread the hall.
I could feel him holding onto me with his Force, trying to contain me almost... trying to comfort me.
I tense when he releases my hand in lieu of draping his arm over my shoulder, "he will not touch you. He will not harm you," he mutters as I look up at him. He stares straight as we continue walking, "I will make it a point to keep this brief. You have nothing to worry about."
I wanted his words to comfort me, I wanted him to be able to comfort me so badly. And yet when I was face to face with his master, I couldn't even muster the courage to put my faux brave face on. He pulled away from me and pushed me behind him as he greeted the being.
"Why do you continue to disappoint me so, Kylo Ren?" Snoke inquires with a voice of disdain.
This had something to do about me, I am sure of it.
"I am doing everything you asked me," Kylo retorts rather simply.
"And I gave you a bride, yet still you have no efforts for an heir!" he accuses, "must I teach you even in the ways of the flesh, boy?!"
Kylo clenches his fist, he mumbles, "no."
"THEN DO YOUR DUTY!"
"I am making sure everything is perfect for her. She cannot bear me and heir if she is damaged or scared," Kylo retorts.
Snoke tilts his head, "and are you trying to say that has something to do with me?"
"I am SAYING-" Kylo Ren starts, raising his voice as he did. In my shock, I pull back at his cloak, not wanting to feel the wrath of his master. Not now, not ever, especially not in my dreams, not again.
Kylo holds himself back. He huffs, "I will do my duties as her husband. This isn't something for you to meddle with."
"Meddle?" Snoke scoffs but then laughs. He, in fact, laughs so hard, it echoes in the room. He catches his breath then sighs, "Fine." Snoke raises a finger and suddenly, Kylo's boots skid on the floor as he is moved away to reveal me from behind him.
I turn to Snoke, feeling my heart quicken in my ribcage.
Kylo steps back in front of me. I take his arm and hold onto it for dear life.
Snoke stares at his protégé. He tilts his head, "I expect this to change, soon. Her belly should never not be carrying an heir."
Her belly should never not be carrying an heir.
Her belly should never not be carrying an heir.
Her belly should never not be carrying an heir.
"Enough!" Kylo snaps me out of my trance. I turn to him, eyes wide, body trembling. We weren't in the throne room any more, we were in our chambers, soaked in dark retreat of it all. I had no idea when we got here. All I know was I was here with Kylo, who was clutching my face so tightly. He looks at me with something of annoyance, something of concern, "don't think about him anymore, think about me. Just think about me."
I shake my head in sheer disbelief. I push his hands away, "is that supposed to make me feel better?"
Kylo straightens.
"You," I start, "want me here for the same reason he does!"
His expression hardens.
"You and him had plagued me with nightmares for as long as I can remember," I shake my head, "the only reason, I think, I don't have them anymore is because I actually get to live my nightmares out in real life."
"So?" he quips, "what do you mean to say?"
I bite my lip, "just-" I feel my eyes water, "take what you want and... and-"
I hold my breath when Kylo grabs my chin and tilts my head up to look at him. He brings his face close to mine. His nose is barely brushing my own. I feel his hot breath on my face as he enunciates one word, "want."
I blink rapidly at the sound of his voice.
"Shhh," he hushes, "if it's Snoke you worry about, don't. I have been planning something for him, long before you even came to me. He is the least of your worries," he explains. "But do you know what I want, bride?" he asks, as though to taunt me.
I shudder. I think of replying, but I don't.
"I know what you want," he mutters. He begins to move forward, and so I have no choice but to move back as he pushes me in the direction he wants, "you want to run away from me, baby bird. You think you can break free."
His hand only leaves my chin when my calves hit the foot of the bed and I fall back, heart hammering, breath clawing at my throat. He drones, "but what I want?"
Kylo Ren undoes his gloves and undoes his belt as he towers over me.
I want to strangle your light. I want to break you so badly. I want to fucking burn you from the inside until you can only hear yourself screaming from how good it feels to finally have your wet, little c-
I slap my hands to my mouth I hear the thoughts running through his head.
Kylo stills. He tilts his head then chuckles, "so... you heard that?"
I sigh deeply, attempting to even my breath as I back away from him. I squeak when he lunges and traps me beneath him. He crushes me against his chest and pins my wrists by my head. I turn away from him as he whispers hotly against my ear, "it would be so easy to have you like this, right?"
My screw my eyes shut. Tears lace my lashes.
"You won't even fight me off, you couldn't."
I shudder when he releases one of my wrists and brings his free hand down to my thighs. I feel my body burn and tingle at his slow caress.
He kisses my jaw and my skin there is set ablaze, "you don't want to fight me off," he chuckles, "you could at least do something with your hand to save face."
When I finally remember where my free hand is, Kylo takes it back in his and lifts his head, "too late." He pushes himself up, "look at me."
I clench my jaw.
"You'll know never to make me ask for the same thing twice."
I give a shallow huff and open my eyes, looking up at him.
"I want you to beg me," he whispers, "I want you to be so desperate to finally," he begins to further pull away, "finally, take you," he knits his brows, "to make you my wife that you get on your knees and weep for it."
A shiver runs down my spine as I watch him get up from the bed and grab his gloves, "until then," he reaches his hand out and uses his Force to cover me with the sheets, "you belong to yourself."
He haunts me in my dreams that night. Not as a figure of darkness, not as a ghost, but as a man, as starving entity, ready to consume me, eager to take me.
He haunts me every night after. And every night his intentions are made clearer and clearer until I wake up and think he and I wake up and I'm shocked he's not actually there.
It became hard to look at him, especially when my stomach began to flip and my thighs involuntarily pressed together. I was turning sick.
And then one day, the news spreads like wildfire. Snoke is dead, Kylo Ren is the Supreme Leader, and I, his Supreme Empress.
It was weird. I was called Empress before and he was called Emperor before, but now, now it was real. Now I was parading with Kylo Ren in the capital, looking at citizens waving at us and throwing flowers our way. And then I was shaking strangers' hands and Kylo snarled at whomever dared embrace me a second too long.
But what really cemented our reign and the realness of it all, was when someone tried to attack me. Kylo felt the assailant before he got too close though and choked him dead in the middle of the crowd. I watched as the man's weapon fell to the ground, as he withered in pain, as he eventually stopped moving. He suffered. I knew Kylo wanted him to. The festivities were long over after that, and I was then I was reminded of who he truly was.
He was a brute. A beast. The shadow in my mind. He was-
I turn over my left as a blanket is draped over my shoulder. Kylo Ren sits beside me on the bed and offers me glass of water, "I'm sorry you had to see that."
I huff at the sound of his apology. I wrap my blanket tighter on me.
He sighs and brings the glass to the table using his Force, "I would do it again, though. You should know. I would not hesitate even a second."
I curl my legs up into my chest, "am I supposed to be grateful?"
"I would prefer if you were," he mutters.
"Kylo..."
I suck in a breath when he says his name.
"I'm- I'm too tired to argue. I want to go to sleep," I mutter, moving on the bed until I was laid down. Kylo watches me as I do this, then stands.
"Wait," I call out, surprising even myself.
Kylo stills.
No turning back now. "I... I don't want to be alone... not after that... even though you did it."
Kylo waits.
He debates my words.
I hide behind my blanket, "nevermi-"
The next thing I know, I feel him move next to me. And there, he lies.
I feel him next to me. We're under the same blanket. I feel myself begin to grow warm.
"I can get a separate blanket if you're so uncomfortable."
"Get out of my fucking thoughts."
"... ... I don't want to."
I grunt and wrap myself tightly under the blanket, surely yanking however much was on Kylo off.
"Your mind is an oasis to me."
I say nothing.
"My mind is a dessert, you are my oasis."
I huff through the sheets, "don't talk to me like that."
"Like what?"
"Like that!"
"I'm telling you what-"
"I'm done with this conversation."
I close my eyes and tighten my embrace on myself. I release a breath and try to clear my mind.
"Are you that cold?" Kylo murmers
"I'm not cold."
"I know."
"Then why did you ask?" I quip turning to him.
I freeze when I do so, instantly regretting my decision. He was lying on his side, looking at me, his face was right in front of mine and his arms were wrapped around himself. He blinks slowly as he looks at me, "I know you want to be held."
I huff through my slightly agape mouth, then I clench my jaw tightly. I move back from him cautiously, retreating into my covers, into myself.
"I can hold you," he mutters softly.
I turn away from him, feeling my body ignite.
"I want to hold you," he whispers even softer. Let me hold you.
Shut up, get out of my head.
He takes a moment before speaking again. He releases a breath, "am I that terrifying to you, baby bird?"
Yes.
"Then why do you mutter my name while you sleep?"
I tighten my arms around myself. Stop trying to get into my head.
"I'm already in your head," he retorts, voice closer now, "and in your heart."
"Shut up," I whimper.
I hear high-pitched laugh in my head. His voice surrounds me through the Force. It makes my skin raise. I'm only telling you the truth.
"Face me," he mutters, "coward."
I scoff. I heave, feeling my insides curdle. I clench my jaw then hiss, "at least I'm not a killer with no remorse."
He laughs, "you're making it seem like I should have let him attack you."
"You didn't have to kill him!" I snap, turning back to him, pushing myself up on my palms, "you could have given him a prison sentence."
"For what?!" he barks back, unravelling his crossed arms, lifting face up slightly, "so he could plan to attack you again, but next time when I'm not around to defend you?!"
"He only wanted to attack me because I'm married to you!" I hiss, sitting up from my spot.
Kylo sits up too and shakes his head, "he wanted to attack you because he thinks you're my weakness."
"Because I am your weakness!" I quip, "I'm your docile bride!"
He scoffs, grabbing my jaw, "you made yourself into this, little girl," he leans towards me. My pulse quickens as he pushes my head back, hand coming to the side of my face, fingers digging into my hair, "you where the rebel that fought against my troops and managed to escape me. The Force is strong with you," he places his other hand on the other side of my face, "that is why you are my bride."
When Kylo Ren pulls away and lies down, my insides begin to burn, to fume, and rage at his words. I watch him and I slowly begin to see red. And yet, he closes his eyes and acts like this whole conversation didn't happen. He prepares to sleep like there's nothing wrong.
This is my final straw.
I lunge at him. I dart my claws out and growl. I jump on him and press down on his throat. I straddle him and lean all my weight all my strength onto his airways. His eyes shoot open. His hands dart to my wrists. He begins to choke. I put all my anger into my grip. I force against him, knowing full well if I lost the upper hand, I'd be dead.
Except he doesn't make an move beyond clutching my wrists. I wait for him to attempt to overpower me, I wait for him to throw me off him the way I knew he could, and end all of this, and, in turn, kill me instead, but he doesn't.
He doesn't fight back.
Instead he looks up at me as his air leaves him as his face begin to turn maroon, as his veins begin to stress, as his final breaths escape his lips. And then I realize what I was doing and I pull back.
I pull back and heave in horror, wrists breaking free of his hold, hovering by my chest as I looked down at him while he caught his breath. He closes his eyes as his palms land on my thighs. My eyes water, the same way tears laced his lashes.
Why didn't he fight back?
Why isn't he fighting back?
He wanted me to kill him?
He wanted me to kill him?
I watch as his chest rises and falls beneath me. I am then suddenly aware of our position. I feel a tinge burn in my cheeks and my core. It's inexplicable, whether I am embarrassed over the fact I tried to kill him or the fact I was straddling him beneath me.
Before I can get off him though, he finally overpowers me and traps me beneath him. Easily. Swiftly. I was nothing against him. And this fact was amplified as he pins my wrists down on the pillows overhead with just one hand. He presses himself against me, heaving heavily, as if he was doing something with great restraint. It makes my stomach drop.
"That's the difference between you and I," he pants, as his one hand comes up to my neck, "if I wanted you dead, my love..." he begins to press down on my throat.
I begin to panic and thrash beneath him.
Shhhhhh.
He steadies me still in his place. I am overcome by him, unsure if it was just his physical prowess or if he was using his Force as he pushes down on me. I get a semblance of an answer when the pressure on my throat remains and I unable to move my wrists though both his hands go to the sides of my thighs.
I gulp as he leaves hot kisses all over my skin. I huff sharply when I am released of my Force bounds. My hands dart to his torso, gripping at his clothes as I try to push him away.
I would never damage you.
I let out a sound when he releases his chokehold.
Not unless you want me to.
Kylo then begins to bring his face close to mine, pressing our cheeks together for a moment. My stomach rolls and my breath hitches when his hot lips meet my mine. My heart is racing. He undoubtedly could feel it against him.
My panic rises. I quickly manage in between kisses, "Kylo-"
"Beg me," he pulls away and breathes against my ear, "beg me..." he kisses the pulse on my neck, "to get off you-- to leave you alone, to shoot myself into the sun-"
Kylo begins to rub himself between my open legs. Slowly. Roughly. I whimper. He freezes. I feel blood rise up my face. I begin to push him back harder.
He tightens his hold on me, repelling my actions by pressing his weight further onto me, "beg me to finally make you live out your fantasies," his voice loudens, "to make you mine."
I grit my teeth tightly.
"Beg me," he groans, "beg."
I whine, nails digging into his sides as I push against him.
He kisses my jaw, hands leaving my thighs, grabbing my wrists, pushing them down on my sides, "use your words. Hark to me, my baby bird."
My breath hitches, "Kylo, please."
Kylo pulls his face back, nose just above mine, looking down at me with hooded eyes. He waits for me to continue, breath straining as he did. My lips part and my feel my pulse echo in every inch of my body.
I gulp and ready to speak... but I can't. I don't. My mouth goes dry and all I could think about was how his dark locks were framing his face, and how his lips were moving as he heaved arduously, and how I wanted to find where the scar on his face ended.
Then I am ripped out of my incredulous thoughts.
"Please what?" his breath his hot against my face as he coaxes.
I close my lips and catch my breath that was leaving me, "please... stop."
"Stop what, darling?" he utters. I close my eyes when he leans his forehead against mine. He releases my wrists, hands coming to my sides, nails scratching down me until his large hands ended up on my thighs again. I squeak when his hips buck into mine with more intent.
My hands come to Kylo's neck, fingers digging into the roots of his hair.
He shifts atop me, pulling his head back up, weight all on my core, making me moan at the pressure. His nose brushes against mine. He breathes out my name. My eyes shoot open because of it.
I find his eyes are screwed shut, a line between his brows. His jaw clenches. His nostrils flare as he steadies his breathing.
"Kylo-"
"Yes," he speaks before I even finish saying his name.
His eyelids slowly part when I tug his face towards me, legs tightening around his waist, crossing over his back. He lets out a huff that bounces from my face to his. His hands rub down to my butt and there his grip tightens.
Right when our lips brush against each other, he lifts his head ever so slightly and whispers, "beg me to make you mine."
My throat tightens.
"I need to hear it," his voice is soft.
I suck in a breath and call out his name.
He releases a sharp one as he says mine.
I call out his name.
He responds with mine.
I hesitate.
He rubs his nose against mine then says quietly, "make me yours please."
I suck in a breath. My stomach explodes with butterflies. "Make... me yours," I mumble, relaxing against him, hands rubbing down his neck to his shoulders. I close my eyes and sigh, "please."
He nods, "louder."
"Kylo-"
"Louder," he mutters with a tight breath, "one last time."
"Make me yours, please."
Kylo hisses then connects his lips to mine. He moans, amplifying the hungriness of the kiss. His hands are quick and desperate as they grip at my clothing. He pushes off me and begins to strip me of all the hindrances on my being
I whimper as he eagerly does his work. One by one, he rips my clothes off. He does so with such impatience, I hear the tears and the strains of my clothes.
He sits me down as he removes each piece off me until I'm left in my panties. I wrap my arms around my bare chest. Kylo leans in, hands rubbing my bare thighs. My skin pricks because of the contact. He mutters, "your turn, my dear."
He kisses me as he grabs my hands. He pries them off my chest and ends our kiss, placing my palms at the hem of his top. He lifts his hands, eyes not leaving mine, wordlessly urging me to strip him.
I shift on my knees and pull his top off, discarding it along with the rest of my clothing that he threw on the floor. My hands instinctively come to his pants, fiddling the belt on his waist band.
He gets on his knees and grabs my face. He pulls me in for a kiss, moving closer until I'm pressed against the headboard. He guides my hands as they push his pants down.
We keep kissing until he breaks away to strip all together. I don't have time to react cause when he does, he pushes me down using his Force, and brings my legs together as to rid me of the last thing keeping me modest. I screw my eyes shut as he snatches my underwear.
Before I could feel too conscious about being naked in front of the man that was my husband, about to consummate our marriage, I let out a shaky sound as my legs are grabbed and pushed apart.
I suck in a breath as my arms fly again to my chest. They only stay there for a moment. Even that, Kylo pulls apart as he presses against me. He presses my arms down on the pillows by the sides of my head.
I am unable to conceal my cries at the feel of his hot body pressing against mine. I feel his taut stomach press against my core. It drew out another sound I could not keep in. I feel my pulse against him. I feel my wetness smear on his skin. His hands leave my arms to grab onto my thighs.
When I finally dared to open my eyes, I caught the moment Kylo sank his head onto my chest and began to suckle at the skin on my sternum.
I whimper then I bite my lip tightly. Kylo looks up at me as he takes my left breast and nips at it. He begins to rub against me.
I fist his hair into my hands. I press my head back against the pillows. Kylo's hands travel to my hipbones and digs in his fingers into me. He releases my breast and checks on his work, appreciating the mark he left of my skin before continuing to attend to my breast with his mouth.
I tighten my legs around his waist as he continues to grind down on me. I feel my heart racket behind my ribs as Kylo moves to my other breast.
"Kylo," I whimper, as my nails dig into his scalp.
He moans and releases my flesh, whispering hotly against my skin, "yes, my empress?"
I exhale through my open mouth and look at him with a dazed expression. I clutch his cheeks, "I want you-- need you-" I sigh.
Kylo lifts his body slightly, one hand releasing my hip. "To what?" he murmurs, "-need to hear you say it."
His fingers roughly draw a line from my side to my core. I gasp when he touches my aching nub. I lift my head, looking out at his hand as he looks down on me. His two digits dote on the wet heat between my legs. He slowly rubs circles on my flesh, teasing my entrance.
He holds my hips in place as a squirm beneath him. Then his hands hook by the curve of my thigh and pushes one leg up to my chest. He leans in and says, "need to what, my bride?"
I whine as my hands brush down to his shoulders. I claw at him, pulling him closer to me, "need to..." whimper, "to be made yours."
He exhales loudly. He heaves heavily as he sinks two fingers into my sopping core, slowly and firmly rubbing into me, stretching my flesh deliciously. I whine like a wraith.
"You have no idea how long I've imagined touching you like this," he admits as he toys my entrance with his fingers.
"Kylo."
He pulls his hand away and grabs my other thigh, pushing it up by my ribs.
I look at him as he brings his face close and lifts his hips. He digs his fingers into the bend of my knees and my toes curl when I feel him press against me, hard and pulsing.
I lick my lips and break into a whine when he slowly sheathes himself into me, releasing a hot breath by the crown of my head as he did so.
I whimper at the feel of him sinking in all the way. I tighten my legs around him and reach out to the sheets by my sides and rip at them.
Kylo slowly begins to rock into me, groaning as he does so, "so warm, wet and soft," he grabs my hands and places it on his back, "so soft and-" he licks my skin and bites down.
I choke on my breath as he does this. His pace thrusts hasten. He hands grab my knees and push them into my chest, "mine. All mine."
He lifts himself up and ruts into me with vigor.
Soon enough I feel my mind blur while my voice lets out incoherences at the snapping of Kylo's hips.
I claw at his back with little regard for how much it may hurt him.
Kylo howls in response, quickening his pace even more, adjusting his hold on me until his position was perfect and my head was knocking slightly into the board.
"Fill you up with me," he grunts, "fill you until you're a mess, mark you until you're tender, repeat until you're sore."
I don't respond. I don't know what to. I don't have much of a brain to speak anything anyway.
Kylo thrusts into me at such a strong and steady pace, it's not long until I feel a flurry in my stomach and a tingle in my chest.
I whine out his name. I pull him into me. He leans in and huffs against my cheek, "feels good, right? I can make you feel good."
I catch his lips into my teeth. He rip away only to kiss me as he breaks me.
We pull away to breathe yet Kylo does lose his tempo. I feel my eyes water and my mouth dry over my continuous jaw dropped cries.
"Just want to make you feel good," he whispers heavily, "want to make you mine."
"Feel so good," I mindlessly mutter, "so - Kylo."
In that next moment, I feel my insides shatter around him. I let out a loud cry of relief. My fingers curl into his back as I tighten and convulse around him. My toes curl as I lock my legs around him. Instantaneously, I feel a sharp heat splatter into me and it magnifies my delirium.
I hear him curse and whine against my ear. I feel him tighten his hold on me as he continues the work with his hips, still as quick as before.
And as I ride out my high and tighten around him, only then does Kylo's actions find some irregularity. My head no longer hits the board, though my body very much still moves up and down with Kylo's movements.
As the final ripples of my pleasure calm down, so does the knocking of our hips.
When he is satisfied, he releases my hips and grabs my face. He kisses me and catches his breath in between.
"Do you want me to get off you?" he asks.
I quickly shake my head in disagreement and wrap my arms around him.
"Good," he rests his head beside mine and slowly relaxes on top of me. He sighs and brushes his nose against my head, "I want to stay in you forever."
I bite my lip and lean my face into his.
"I will write your name in the stars," he whispers, "I will give you everything in the galaxy. All you have to do is be mine."
I gulp and sigh heavily, yet I internally find myself agreeing.
His hand rubs my side, "I hope you don't get pregnant too quickly," he kisses my head, "there's so much I have to do with you first."
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Can you do something angsty with Kylo ren for the 1k follower event? Like makeup/breakup (or both) preferably with a little 🌶️🥵
Kylo Ren, my favorite sad boy. Maybe it’s because I have such a crush on Adam Driver, but I adore Kylo Ren. Maybe it’s because I love dark side-leaning hotties. (Although nothing compares to Darth Maul but I digress). Now, I (personally) see Kylo Ren/Ben Solo as one person, just different personas, however, for this prompt, we’re talking about Kylo Ren. How would Kylo Ren react to a makeup/breakup scenario?? Honestly? Probably not well. Let’s be real.
Most of these are with gn!reader w/ an exception or two.
Content & Warnings (MDNI): angst, toxic/unhealthy relationships, suggestive themes, possessive behavior, non-descriptive mentions of sex
Word Count: 587
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First and foremost, with how toxic the First Order is, and everyone wanting leverage on others in order to move up the ranks, Kylo would never be open about his relationship with you. He would do everything in his power to hide his relationship with you for that very reason. It’s almost giving Anakin hiding Padme from the Jedi, but in a different light.
Of everyone that might know, it would be Supreme Leader Snoke. Snoke would absolutely use this relationship to manipulate Kylo Ren. He’d encourage the passion but would also devise ways to undermine Kylo’s relationship with you. He’s basically Palpatine in that regard.
The breakup would come from you, not from Kylo Ren unless Snoke deliberately told him to call it off. Even then, I think Kylo would try to hang on to you. He leans toward the dark side but he’s not Sith. He just wants to belong, and he wants to be wanted.
The breakup isn’t explosive or argumentative. If anything, Kylo appears outwardly calm. It’s almost frustrating for you because you wanted some kind of reaction from him.
It’s the afterward, when you leave, that Kylo loses it. That lightsaber is coming out and heads are rolling. He’ll never unleash his anger on you, but he’ll unleash his anger on stormtroopers, control panels, and literally anything else that might be in his way.
After Kylo has cooled off, he’s going to come after you. This man is determined to hunt you down and keep you by his side, even if you don’t want it. Let’s be real here folks, Kylo’s love is toxic and unhealthy, especially if we’re talking about Force Awakens & Last Jedi Kylo Ren. This man will search the galaxy to find you again.
He’ll do it himself, too. He’s not leaving this task up to stormtroopers or to Hux. Kylo and his Knights are coming after you. Period.
When he does find you again, you put up a fight, but you’re no match for him. Kylo drags you back with him and confines you to a room. It’s comfortable, and you have everything you need, but you’re not allowed to leave.
Kylo visits you often, and in this, he is also calm—to a point. He insists you made the wrong choice, and is fairly reasonable about it. But of course, you push his buttons. Eventually, he fractures, and he’s more like the Kylo we see in the interrogation room with Rey. Kylo has patience, but it’s only for you.
This back-and-forth eventually implodes, coming to a head that only ends with the two of you reuniting physically.
It’s Kylo that acts first. He wants you, and he always wants you to stop talking for a few seconds. Which is why he grabs the back of your neck and draws you in for a kiss.
You don’t fight him. You melt into him, wrapping your arms around his neck. These first few kisses are all soft, and then quickly devolve into insistence.
Clothes are ripped away from bodies until it’s skin-against-skin.
Kylo needs to dominate here. He needs to establish that he’s the one in control and that you only want him.
He won’t force anything. Kylo will never cross that line.
Kylo will need verbal confirmation that you’re his. He might delay or even control your orgasm just to hear you say that you belong to him.
Kylo will make you beg, and won’t give you your end until he’s complete satisfied that you’re his again.
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#kylo ren#kylo ren x reader#kylo ren x you#kylo ren fanfic#kylo ren headcanon#kylo ren fanfiction#kylo ren fic#kylo ren headcanons#ben solo#star wars sequel trilogy#star wars fanfiction#star wars headcanons#star wars fanfic#star wars fic#kylo ren x gender neutral reader#kylo ren x gn!reader#kylo ren x female reader#kylo ren x f!reader#kylo ren x fem!reader#star wars smut#star wars imagine#ben solo x reader#ben solo x you#ben solo fanfiction#ben solo fanfic
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Two Ghosts
pairing: kylo ren x queen!reader
word count: 2.6k
warnings: neglect, arranged marriage, dislike of s/o, reader has children, descriptions of periods, domestic abuse, old values (women are dainty bullshit), guys kylo isn’t nice remember that, fertility issues, stopping of a period due to stress, reader lives for her children basically, reader obviously has anxiety, reader is basically breaded for heirs, kylo is awkward (the dude doesn’t have social skills. at all. whatsoever), even though he still has some rizz (call him kylo rizz if you would), a good ending? idk guys remember kylo just isn’t a great person and the first order isn’t a good organization too
a/n a long warning list 😬. anyways i never get notes on kylo fics but i simply do not care. i love writing new content for this man. he deserves it all.
summary Kylo tries being the husband Y/N always wanted him to be
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read time: 9 mins 40 seconds
Watching you felt almost wrong. The neglect he’s given you through the years- the pain you’ve felt and him not caring about you for as long as he’s known you.
He didn’t deserve to watch this beautiful sight of his family, the family he didn’t even want. The family he wasn’t even apart of. You two were an arranged marriage, married for political reasons. He needed an heir, your father needed peace on your home planet. You and your children had always been a nuisance to him.
You had given up on the romantic attempts years ago. But something in this sight, something about you right then made him sick. Something made him click taking in this view from the balcony on the hill.
For weeks he had longing feelings of sadness. He hated admitting it and rejected it as much as he could, but light was seeping into the cracks. His moods began to lighten softly, not enough for you to notice but enough to scare him. Now looking down and feeling this, it was just a confirmation of what was really happening to him.
The sun shown down on your beautiful yellow dress that was layed out on the grass. Your hair was up in intricate braids due to the heat on Naboo, the tiny loose strands were swaying in the wind. The field you sat in was just off a short cliff, the beautiful rural city and coast were just feet away. The perfect escape between the busy city and the old city. The mansion sat atop the hill, separating the two separate terrains. You were on a vacation and had begged him to come for the sake of his children.
Your oldest son ran around you in circles, playing with a TIE one of his father’s assistants bought him for Christmas. Kylo couldn’t be bothered to celebrate, let alone give gifts. Henry was just shy of his sixth birthday. His blonde hair was messy and in need of a cut sometime soon. His gray tunic and black pants matched his father’s aesthetic a little too much for your liking. Running around, he made engine sounds as the ship would like a typical 5 year old.
Your youngest daughter sat in front if you, playing with some wildflowers she had plucked into an array of ‘jewlery’. She was three. Unlike her brother, she had beautiful strong brown hair. Unbeknownst to you, it completely mirrored her grandmothers. You had her hair in your hands, coming through it with your fingers trying to decide what design to attempt today. Amala squirmed as she attempted to join her brother, but you kept her in place in your lap. She was to learn to be a lady as you were. Her dark pink dress was spread out in front of her.
Kylo watched you as the pit in his stomach felt odd. It had always been empty, but this time something ached inside of it. He had never had any interest in you. The times you ever had sex were intended and resulted in children, exactly what he needed. He cared more about Henry than Amala. Henry was the oldest and the heir to the First Order. But work called. He was never a family man, he was never meant to be a family man.
These feelings continued to conflict him throughout the night.
As the sun set you came in with the children. The nannies took them upstairs and readied them for bed. You took your place at the long dinner table. On the opposite side sat your husband- legally.
Over the years you obviously lusted for other men. You didn’t even dare act on your thoughts, or barely thought the thoughts at all. You knew Kylo would have their heads within seconds. With an absent husband emotionally and physically it was hard. In the first few years of your marriage, you struggled with fertility problems. Life was so lonely without the children. He grew angrier and angrier with you each time you got your cycle and your anxiety got so bad that it soon stopped. Your doctor moved you to separate chambers and eventually Henry was conceived after years of trying.
You felt like a failure before your son was born.
After copious amounts of treatment during your pregnancy, Henry was born. And then a while after that Supreme Leader Snoke granted you permission to have another. An heir and a spare.
You and Kylo sat silently eating your dinner. Over the years, you had perfected your etiquette. No slurping your wine, no scratching of the fork on the plate. At dinner you would mostly go over your thoughts from the day. The tuition papers you had to sign for Henry’s first school next year. Amala refusing to listen to her nanny and requesting her mommy really warmed your heart. The beautiful memory of that day you had spent with the children. The fact that you were doing it alone and was so good at it.
He listened to your thoughts. You knew he did. No datapad, no work bot giving him constant coded updates you didn’t understand. Tonight it was just the two of you. Two strangers eating dinner together. The show, the facade had to go on. Media wise you two were the loveliest couple in the galaxy. In reality, you spoke maybe once a week.
“R-80!” you called from the dining room. Kylo’s head shot up from his plate of food to see you waiting on the cleaner droid. You had finished the meal and was waiting to leave this awkward encounter.
The droid came around and you began to exit the room. His hand deliberately reached out for yours as you walked past him to get to the door.
A tiny gasp escaped your lips. You stopped and pulled your hand back, a concerned look was on display.
You were begging in your mind for this to had been an accident.
“It was no accident,” he said strongly. His deep voice boomed through your ears. You forgot how powerful it could be sometimes.
For the first time in years Kylo was feeling anxiety. Over something so minuscule, speaking to his wife. His eyes met and darted over your face. He recognized the braid pattern in your hair. You had worn it on your wedding day. Rarely he had seen it on you, depending if he even noticed you on the daily. His eyes were drawn to your dark lipstick on the lips that were slightly pursed.
“Your hair-” he said. Your eyes flicked up to the window, looking for any sign of a reflection.
Did he hate it, was he about to tell you to never wear it again? Was a strand so obviously out of place? Hell, why was he even speaking to you in the first place?
“It’s how it was on our wedding day, if I remember correctly.”
You nodded your head. Heat rose to your cheeks. This is the longest conversation you two have had in months.
He stared into your eyes. He forgot just how beautiful you really were. They were still the same as always, but this time with a few unnoticeable lines around them. You refused to meet his gaze, staring forward at the distorted mirroring of the room in the window.
Ten years in with two kids, you had managed to keep up with yourself and your appearances. For what, you really weren’t sure anymore.
“May I be excused? I would like to go check on the children.” you asked, avoiding his eye contact.
“Yes, one moment.” he said, his hand reaching out for yours. You hesitantly took it.
Kylo took a deep breath. Even though he seemed calm and composed, inside of his head the red alarm was going off. The urge to even ask you this went against everything he believed in. The twist in his stomach snapped. He gave in to the light feelings, begging for more after how good he felt after asking you a simple question.
“May I sleep with you in your chambers tonight?”
Your brows furrowed. “D-did you talk to the Supreme Leader? Did he give you permission for another?” you asked him, worried. You loved your children but you had no say in having them. The Supreme Leader could make you give birth to an army if he willed.
“No, no. This isn’t about sex.” he assured you. Of course you assumed it was about sex. It was the only time he ever really spoke to you. A slight relief flew off your shoulders.
You sighed, taking your hand from his. “I’m going to check on the children.”
Your heels clicked down the empty hallway. Something in you secretly hoped that he would follow you to see the children, but you knew your husband.
You were baffled in his sudden change of heart. He hadn’t shared a bed with you since- well, since Amala was conceived. You didn’t deny his request, but neither confirmed it.
Your thoughts kept you company as you walked down the many corridors and hallways of the mansion.
The large door was cracked, left like that by the nannies. They knew your routine better than anyone else. Amala was sleeping closest to the door. The canopy above her bed was swaying from the wind of the open window. Henry was laying on his stomach in a deep sleep, his limbs all sprawled out over the large bed.
A smile rose to your face as you quietly closed the door. Your heart was full once again. No more doubt plagued the poor, confused thing from dinner.
You made your way to your chambers. You passed what you knew was Kylo’s. Shockingly, the door was open. You caught a glimpse of him working at his desk. He looked too large for the thing, trumping the tiny chair in size. The patio was open and the moonlight rushed in, lighting his room ominously.
He caught a glimpse of your flowing yellow dress passing his room. He wanted to finish up a few papers before bed, but in his heart he knew he had to neglect his work for one night.
He mustered up enough courage to knock on your door. A sweet “Coming!” came from inside. Within seconds, your door was open and he was met with your fresh face. You had changed into your night robes and had your natural hair down on your shoulders. The bathroom light was on and he noticed the fresh mint scent coming from your breathe.
Your night maids hadn’t been around yet, he presumed.
Something in your look, your energy died a bit when you saw him.
How had he never noticed? How could all these feelings, these guilt trips be plaguing him now, suddenly? What changed?
“We’re you hoping for a maid?” he asked, following you into the large room. He locked the door behind him.
You sat down back at your vanity, pulling your brush out of the drawer.
“No.” you replied. He knew you were lying.
The bed creaked as Kylo sat down. His dark grey dress pants were perfectly ironed and didn’t crease at the contact. He itched at his black turtleneck, swiping the cuff with his finger. He could hear his watch ticking from his wrist. The room was cold.
“May I ask why you wanted to be here?” you asked, a certain confidence in your voice had occurred. Turning now to face him, you finished brushing your hair and placed your hairbrush back in the drawer.
“Honestly darling, I’m really not sure.”
Darling?
If you weren’t so poised your jaw would have been on the floor.
“Today I saw a sight. You with the kids in the field.”
“Oh Kylo, there children. There’s nothing wrong with them playing in a field if this is what this is about-”
“No. I-”
Kylo Ren had never felt himself speechless before, yet again choking up at the sight of his family he used to despise.
Your tucked your chair back into your vanity. Now standing infront of the cowardly man, you waited for his response.
His hand cradled his forehead as he stared at the floor, watching your perfectly manicured feet come into frame.
That’s when he let his first sob out in years. You quickly embraced him in your arms, his forehead finding a resting place against your stomach. Your hands sprawled over his back in a cautious way. Peeking over ever so slightly, you checked if he had his lightsaber on his belt. Thank the gods he didn’t, you were afraid he would cut you into two.
Nobody had ever seen Kylo Ren cry.
“I don’t understand what you are getting at.” you whispered to him. Another sob came out, you began to rub his back.
“I-I am such a fool.” he managed to speak. His eyes looked up into yours, finally making contact for the first time in forever.
The look on your face was baffled.
“What have I been doing? I have a family- a wife? So much neglect, so much hate. How are you still here, my dear? How have I not driven you away, or driven you to worse? I-I have two children. Two beautiful children I don’t know and such a beautiful wife that I’m strangers with. So many years wasted. How did it take me ten years to see this? How did one small instance make my life come crumbling down around me?” he asked, bawling out his words.
You were speechless.
“I want to learn- please. How do I have such an amazing person with me and I don’t know the slightest thing about her? Tell me, w-what’s your middle name?” he went on, now holding you by the hips and eagerly speaking.
And that’s when it really hit you. You two were strangers.
“Amala,” you muttered out. “Oh! T-that makes so much sense—in our daughter. Her name,”
“What are there names, please tell me.” he seemed to beg.
“Henry Cornelius Benjaq Ren, Amala Charress Bryneri Ren.” you answered, a smile emerging on your lips.
Was this too good to be true?
Kylo was stunned of Henry’s middle name. Benjaq. There was no way you knew of his real name. The coincidence hurt him even more.
“Cornelius and Charress…” he pondered. “They sound so familiar are they…”
“My parents.” you answered him. “King Cornelius! How could I forget? Oh Y/N. I have neglected you for so long. How could you ever forgive me?”
His voice sounded genuine. “It’s definitely going to take time.” you sighed. Suddenly the years of loneliness and suffering flashed back in your mind. You broke away from his embrace and walked to the open balcony, giving him an invitation to follow.
“I will try. Please Y/N, let me.” he begged, following you outside.
The warm air brushed against your cool skin. You sighed, wishing you would wake up from this nightmare and your husband would be back. Did someone poison his food?
The yearning for anyone’s touch seeped into your mind. Watching all the other royal couples around the galaxy, they all seemed to love eachother. Hands touching almost constantly, sneaking a kiss or two at events. It was rare that you even got a photo with Kylo at the parties you would attend.
“I know,” he sighed, taking your hands into his. “I wish I could make it all go away.” he said with remorse.
The waves crashed against the sand. The wind was beginning to pick up. Your hair began to sway in the slight breeze. “Make it then,” you whispered, grazing a hand against his cheek. You dared giving him any sign of affection. You were half expecting him to pull his lightsaber out and cut you in half, just as you thought before. Something felt so wrong, but so right.
You kissed your husband for the first time since your wedding day. His lips were slightly chapped and you could taste the negroni he was drinking at dinner. The moon show down on the both of you, and the feeling he felt seemed to pass on to you. Force sensitive or not, the force was in your favor tonight. You felt the remorse and the pain he had been harboring for years. All the sleepless nights over work and heartache over his past life. You seemed to dilute all of that inside of him. You were the missing piece he was looking for all along. The thing he wanted the least was now his prized possession; his wife, the mother of his children, his Queen, his Empress.
All of that love came back. The feeling of when he was a little boy and still had light into him entered his heart once again. Ben Solo seeped through the cracks of his dark, broken heart.
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Hi I love your neighbor!Ben oneshot!! Can I ask if you have anymore headcanons for him?
—aw hi nonnie! ofc i do, i'm always thinking about neighbor!ben. thank you for sending in an ask <3
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neighbor!BEN SOLO...
— he is most definitely the kind of neighbor to knock on your door and ask for sugar or some shit. he always insists it's for leia, but he won't admit that he's the one telling his mom that he'll run over to yours and ask.
"hey neighbor, mom wanted to know if you have any powdered sugar?" "gosh ben, i just gave you some."
— he loves spending his free time in his garage, wide open, blaring music and working on his (and han's) car. i think these songs would be frequently playing from his speaker, 1 | 2 | 3
— insists on mowing your grass, even though your dad can do it just fine. no, ben likes having an excuse to strut around shirtless in your yard. he also will never accept payment for it.
"i can't let you pay me, sir. it's really no trouble."
— when he and his parents get invited over for dinner he'll make sure to ask you about all things poli-sci (he loves to bring up his minor all the time), headlining legal news, and nineteeth century philosophers. if you can keep up with him, he'll get sardonic and try to get you to fumble. if you're lost, he'll be subtly demeaning and solipsistic.
"let me guess? you think dostoevsky had the world figured out don't you?" "yes. why? do you want me to follow the teachings of comte as religiously as you?" he'd grin, "i'm just making conversation, kid."
— ben would always go on night runs, and on days he actually gets off on time, they end up coenciding with the time you walk your dog. he'll find so much joy in catching up to you and annoying the absolute shit out of you.
"you and cujo should really speed up, i can't jog the entire time." "no one asked you to stay with us."
— on the night run note, one evening he'd see a 'missing dog' poster that barely resembles yours and he'd accuse you of being a dog napper.
"holy shit kid, you can't steal people's dogs!" "shut up solo! i haven't stolen anyone's dog." "oh yeah? then why does this ankle biter look exactly like the one in the picture?"
— he really would just do any stupid or barely thought-out thing to get your attention
— he has no personal space, at least when it comes to you. he'll brush against you no question to grab something, he'll let his hands rest on your shoulders when he's behind you, and he'll cut your steak for you without even giving you a questioning glance.
"i can do some things myself you know." you'd groan, when he begins to cut your rib-eye. only for your mother to pipe in, "honey he's being nice! ignore her ben!"
— ben would constantly be invited to family trips, dinners, and events. especially when your parents catch wind that leia and han aren't home much. so expect ben solo to come along for a day trip into the city with you and your parents.
"you don't have to follow me around. i can navigate a museum on my own." "chill out, kid. i'm just trying to get a good eye on the best installation." you'd pause, "are you... talking about me?" with a smirk he'd reply, "you'd like that, wouldn't you."
— you'd take up a little job tending to leia's garden when she's away, and ben will always make sure to keep you in his eyes. he likes the way you look in overalls and his old batman potting gloves.
— after you're done in the garden he'll give you a glass of homemade lemonade with a sprig of mint. he lets you poke fun of him for it.
"all for me, solo?" "hmm, who else?"
— just like ben, you refuse to be paid for your little side gig. but ben will always leave a crisp twenty in your mailbox the day after. you take them and keep them in a red envelope with the words, 'from hot neighbor', written on the flap in sharpie.
han would catch him doing it one day and say, "can't pay yourself a girlfriend, son." ben would just roll his eyes, "it's not even like that. i'm just trying to not be a cheapskate like you." "sure, son. whatever you say."
#ben solo x reader#ben solo x y/n#modern!ben solo#neighbor!ben solo#ben solo#kylo ren x reader#kylo x reader#kylo ren#ben solo headcanons
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hi!! just wanted to say thank for your service on behalf of the star wars community🫡 your writing is so good! i saw your requests were open and honestly anymore modern/delinquent!kylo content of any kind would be appreciated lol <3 anyways hope you’re having a good day :)
omgggg hi thank you sm <3 lucky for you i am currently working on a part two for nicotine stains !!! im shooting for it to be out by thursday at the latest but knowing me if i have an idea i cant stop until its done so it will most likely be earlier lmao. if you wanna be added to the taglist you can pm me or send another ask that isn't anonymous and i won't post it!
however as a little treat while you wait here are a few more modern/delinquent!kylo hcs my beloved @enviedear and i have come up with:
delinquent!kylo who is constantly taking cute pictures of you. literally doesn't matter what you're doing he just likes looking at you. he keeps a polaroid of you on his dashboard too. he also keeps pictures/love notes/ticket stubs from your dates in the sunglasses compartment and one time you opened it and they all fell out and he was rlly embarrassed about it.
"you weren't supposed to see that."
delinquent!kylo who when you get into fights he cries in his charger to nothing else matters by metallica, i was all over her by salvia palth, my body is a cage by arcade fire, and vindicated by dashboard confessional. he shows up at your window at 3am to apologize. his apologies are always terrible and he never actually says the word sorry, but he means what he says... he's just bad with getting the right words out.
delinquent!kylo whose favorite place to be is his 1969 charger with you in the passenger seat, driving around aimlessly with his hand on your thigh. he likes to play road trippin' by red hot chili peppers because it reminds him of you. he'll softly sing along to the lyrics while stealing glances at you at stoplights.
"'blue you sit so pretty west of the one
sparkes light with yellow icing,
just a mirror for the sun
these smiling eyes are just a mirror for.'"
delinquent!kylo thats childhood best friends with your brother so you all grew up together. your mother has pictures of an 8 yr old kylo helping 5 yr old you reach the kitchen sink and pictures of 12 year old kylo and finn making christmas cookies together. he's had a crush on you since he could remember and he made you a valentines day card when he was in 5th grade but got too nervous to give it to you. he kept it just in case though. he's a devotional lover even if the person he loves isn't aware of it.
delinquent!kylo who looks for you in every girl he dates before the two of you finally got together. one time your parents were out of town so finn threw a basement party. kylo brought his new girl-of-the-week but as she talks to him, he isn't listening. he's watching you across the room dancing with some random guy, wishing that was him.
delinquent!kylo who, when at a different house party, sees you way too drunk and guys getting too handsy so he gets you the hell out of there as fast as possible. he knows you're too drunk to take home to your parents so he takes you to his house. he lets you sleep in his bed and he sleeps on the couch. he doesn't care that he's showing genuine care for you and that you'll pick up on that in the morning. he only cares that you're safe.
delinquent!kylo <3
#kylo ren#kylo ren x reader#ben solo#ben solo x reader#kylo ren headcanons#modern!badboy!kylo makes me rabid#modern!kylo au#delinquent!kylo au
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Star Wars Masterlist
Requests/asks are open!
Main Masterlist
🌶= Spicy times
Series:
☆ While We Dream - Ongoing
As Kylo sleeps he finds himself mysteriously transported to your modern world, while you sleep you find yourself following alongside Kylo as he goes about his duties as “supreme leader?” who even was this guy? And why does he keep talking about ‘the force?'
☆ Forced Connections -Coming soon!
You’re working as a lowly unnoticeable technician aboard The Finalizer when you develop Force powers after an interaction with Kylo Ren.
The new technician Matt knows a lot about The Force and you agree to let him help you hone your powers as long as he sticks to your one condition: Dont. tell. Kylo.
One Shots:
N/a
Ficmas!
HeadCanons:
N/a
#fanfiction#fanfic#fluff#fluff fic#masterlist#star wars masterlist#star wars#star wars fanfiction#star wars headcanons#kylo ren x reader#kylo x reader#kylo ren#kylo x y/n#star wars sequel trilogy#kylo ren x you#kylo ren x y/n#kylo ren imagine#kylo ren fanfic#ben solo#ben solo x reader#ben solo x you#ben solo deserved better#slight angst#upon a starry night writes#matt the radar technician#star wars fic#matt the radar technician x reader#star wars sequels#kylo fanfic#matt x reader
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snow on the beach
and it's like snow at the beach weird but fucking beautiful flying in a dream, stars by the pocketful you wanting me tonight feels impossible
kylo ren with a s/o
parring: kylo ren x gn!reader
genre: fluff, slight angst if u squint
warnings: very brief mention of injuries (no graphic descriptions)
requested?: yes
request: anon: I’d like to see how Kylo Ren would treat his s/o. Do you think he’d be soft to you? Or he just as cold as he fronts?
song prompt: snow on the beach by taylor swift feat. lana del rey
word count: 767
(i could definitely work something out for either part 2 or expand it into an actual fic so let me know if it’s something you’d want to see :))
first of all, I think that there would be two sides when it comes to kylo and his s/o
there would be the public side, the one he shows in front of everyone, especially around the first order
and the one that only very few people, including you, get to see
he definitely works hard to upkeep his tough image, he wants to appear strong and intimidating
but that takes a great toll on a person, especially one under as much pressure as him
so only behind closed doors, you can really see how much that weighs on him
so in public, i feel like he would be very restrained, especially at first
definitely a lot of stolen glances (mostly on his part, the mask makes it pretty easy, but even with that i think he would sometimes forget people can see him turn his head)
and he would also definitely forget he’s not wearing a mask sometimes and full-on stare, which you would endearing, he would find embarrassing, and hux would find straight-up repulsive (”oh get it together ren” with his classic disgusted hux frown)
the public relationship with kylo is very much based on subtlety, he won't hold your hand, but he will definitely ‘accidentally’ touch your hand on numerous occasions
he most definitely has a soft spot for you, i think the first one of his love languages you get to know is gifts
little gestures that mean so much
a book you were talking about? on your nightstand the next day
a childhood favorite food you casually mentioned? suddenly available in the dining hall
and he would never admit to any of it, but you know it was him
another thing he would never do is admit how happy it makes him,when you appreciate all he does
admitting his feelings is not his strongest suit
working through that took some time
like most things in a relationship with him
another love language of his is words of affirmation
but you don't realize it at first (neither does he i feel like)
it takes time for you to see how happy it makes him to hear how much you care about him
and him saying it back for the first time definitely felt really special
he admitted how much he cares about you after he almost died, trying to take down of resistance’s bases
and were really upset with how careless he was
you were cleaning his wounds in silence, because of course he didn't let anyone else touch him
you were focused on cleaning a deep cut on his cheekbone, him sitting down and you standing, leaning in
you felt him shift in his seat uncomfortably when you pressed the gauze against the wound
“stop moving.” was all you could get out, even though still upset with him you felt bad hurting him
the silence after that didn't last long, this time interrupted by him
“i'm sorry.” was all he said
“it’s fine, i’ll try to be more gentle”
“that’s not what i meant. i'm sorry that you had to worry about me.”
it made u stop dead in your tracks, and you lowered your hand from his face, looking at him, unsure of what to say
and although it might have seemed like an odd way to say that he cares about you, you knew how much it mattered
it was the first time you felt like he was breaking through his cold and guarded attitude like he was letting down his defenses
for you.
it was a start for a long and sometimes difficult process of him opening-up
there are definitely moments when it feels like he's going back to his old habits of bottling up and distancing himself from you
and it's definitely a challenge to find the balance between giving him space and getting him to open up
it’s hard work for both of you, but it’s so worth it in the end
i definitely see it as a “you fall first, he falls harder” trope
his also very protective
it takes as much as someone looking at you the wrong way
but god forbid someone actually hurts you
he will do anything to keep one of the very few good things in his life safe
overall, i think he still pretty much keeps to himself in public, especially with the first order around
but behind closed doors, he tries to open up more
and although it takes time, you can see the change slowly happening
let’s just say usually a lot of good things happen behind closed doors.
#kylo ren x reader#star wars x reader#star wars headcanon#ben solo x reader#the force awakens#the last jedi#x reader#reader insert#star wars reader insert
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Me looking at this account and seeing all the unchecked notes (I’m coming back, I’m just doing my own thang right now)
#fanfiction#cowboy bebop#faye valentine#90s anime#jet black#star wars#radio free mars#spike spiegel#see you space cowboy#spike spiegel x reader#ben solo#kylo ren#spike spiegel headcanons#spike spiegel requests#kylo ren x y/n#kylo ren x reader#the last jedi#kylo ren headcanons#adam driver#kylo ren x you#spike spiegel fanfic
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Indy AU Headcanons
The first time Dr. Jones meets his son, it’s summer of 1943 and he’s hanging upside down in a cave in Egypt, having sprung a trap meant for far stupider men.
To say that it’s a shock to see him, this man, claiming to be his son, is an understatement. But then again, Indiana had had his fair share of dalliances with women over the years.
It was odd to see Ben, it was odd his name was Ben. It was odd there were so many things about him that he had no clue about. He wonders if Ben would ever share them, or if the tension thick enough to cut with a knife, would always remain.
You weren’t helping the cause, and you knew it. Dr. Jones had been your mentor for four years now, but you’d known him for years prior to that. He was your professor and your boss, but he was also a friend -- or rather, a friend of your parents.
Once upon a time, Indiana used to come around for family dinners. Now, you’re lucky if you can get him to scarf down a proper meal in between the way he pours himself into his books. “70% of Archaeology is done in the museum,” as he would always say.
Ben takes after his father in one regard -- stubbornness. From the moment he joins your team, rather unwillingly, he is argumentative, antagonistic, and a downright pain. He’s too used to being alone, doing things his way, that much you can gather from the first 12 hours with him.
But...after the first 12 hours, and then 24, and then 48, and somewhere along the way, you find that you really enjoy his company. He’s a pain in your ass, yes, but he’s smart and funny and intense. He’s chivalrous and kind in his own way, even if he never smiles. At least Dr. Jones smiles.
By the time you’re stateside, resuming your post at Marshall College with the two of them -- because of course Ben tags along -- you find yourself in a tricky situation: you’ve grown feelings for them both.
And so begins one of the more difficult decisions the three of you have to make...deciding how this particular adventure ends.
#indiana jones x reader#kylo ren x reader#ben solo x reader#indiana jones au#headcanons#adcu#adam driver fanfic#adcu fanfic#indiana jones x ben solo x reader
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tell me what you want (NSFW)
Pronouns: none // gender neutral
/NSFW Kylo Ren x Reader/
A/N: sooo... I'm back (kinda). I've been struggling about my writing lately but my last Kylo imagine (this one) keeps getting notes so I decided to write a sequel! I hope yall enjoy ~
Warnings: reader is bottoming, Kylo is very straightforward and not gentle at all, mind fuck (literally), inappropriate use of the force.
—
On his way to the training quarters, Kylo realized he forgot about his helmet... but he couldn’t bring himself to give a damn.
You had seen his face before, but barely. Which proved to be a distraction.
You couldn't look away from him. His face, the way his hair moved around with his every move, his expressions when he glanced at you, his mouth…
Barely executing any attacks, you only halfway managed to deflect Kylos. And on the last strike, you let your lightsaber fall to the ground.
His own lightsaber then pointed at your neck, inches from skin. Anxiety now filling your chest.
"Pick it up" an unfiltered voice spoke. Deep and stern. With the lack of his helmet's modulator, his voice was so clear... it resonated through your body.
Slowly, you managed to move. Lowering yourself until your hands grazed the saber on the ground. Kylo kept his focus on you, maintaining eye contact and still following your neck with his lightsaber.
With one swift move, Kylo lifted his hand and, using the force, summoned your saber to him. Leaving you there kneeling and confused.
You stayed in position for what seemed like forever, just staring at Kylo and his dark eyes. The way he looked at you was... intense. But you weren't sure about his intentions. Maybe you were just crazy and desperate or-
"You look good like that..." almost a whisper, but audible in the now utmost silence of the room. Kylo had turned his saber off and looked at you up and down with what you could only describe as hungry eyes.
Your body shivered, heat forming in your core as you inhaled sharply. You weren't crazy. A thrill danced down your spine as you realized that. And Maker, how much you wanted this man.
He must have sensed your excitement, for now, his face displayed a smug half-smile. Yeah, you wanted him, but sometimes wanted to punch the man in the gut for always looking into your thoughts like that.
"Say that again?" he ordered mocking, in a way. His face full of delight... he enjoyed himself too much.
"What do you want, Kylo?" you were irritated but turned mad when your question was met with silence and a stare. Ok, two could play the same game.
With all the concentration and force you could gather, you managed to look inside Kylo's mind. And what you found was... not really any resistance.
"Tell me what you want... master." you insisted, voice inside his brain now. Maybe a bit too bold, but you couldn't resist using that last word. It sounded so right, so deliciously defiant, and you knew Kylo could appreciate that.
But nothing could have prepared you for his response.
Kylo took a fistful of your hair, hard enough to hurt. Then lowered himself to talk into your ear, but didn't. The voice came from inside your head.
"I want to take you and absolutely ruin you. Make you into a mewling pathetic mess. You’ll cry my name while I claim your body and in the end, you’ll be mine. Mine..." his voice was full of you could almost mistake as rage, his desire so intense and mad it sent a cold sweat through you.
You closed your eyes at that, emotions too overwhelming to bare. That only proved to be worse. His voice now came accompanied by visuals.
In a bed, naked, the both of you laid. Kylo kissed you with hungry urgency, teeth nipping at your lower lip while one of his hands tugged at your hair, making you hum in anticipation.
Then, with a pull on your hips, you were spun around with your back facing him. Hands gripping the sheets as his long fingers grazed at your skin, down your spine...
You felt every single thing like it was actually happening, felt the way his skin ran through yours, his sweat and his tongue and lips and...
Suddenly you felt the tip of his cock grazing your entrance, slowly penetrating you at first but then rapidly gaining momentum as your walls deliciously stretched.
Maker, he was fucking you. Harsh and deep and full of need. His cock hitting a sweet little spot with every thrust, and you were a mess.
He felt so big as he pinned you against the mattress, dominating you with his body.
Kylo was tugging at your hair while growling with pleasure. A sound so deep it sent you shivers and ached at your core. "So tight and horny for me, such a slut."
You felt out of this plane, out of your mind. All you could do was cry and shout Kylo's name. Dumb with the feeling of him around and inside you.
With a loud exhale, Kylo grunted softly "You're mine..." voice coarse with pleasure, he sank his teeth into your neck, starved and urgent. Oh, it felt so good, the pain and the pleasure mixing into pure bliss, you almost couldn't take it anymore. "I-I'm... I'm gonna..."
Before you could finish, the image was gone. Kylo shoved you by the hair onto the floor, both of you flushed red and sweating.
Panting, you were reminded it wasn't real... the bastard didn't even let you finish. And now you were on the floor, shocked.
Kylo could hide his hitched breath, but couldn't hide the redness on his face... maybe he didn't mean to show that much.
"Meet me at my quarters after dinner. We got many things to discuss..." Kylo stormed out of the room, face blushing and sweat coming down his temples.
You were left dumbfounded, a bit humiliated, and really horny. Did he fantasize about all of that before? Since when? How many fantasies did he have? Did he think about you often?
Yeah, you're sure you'd get all the answers soon enough.
#imagine#star wars#kylo ren#ben solo#kylo ren x reader#kylo ren x gn reader#ben solo x reader#adam driver#gender neutral#gender neutral reader#self insert#fanfic#fanfiction#headcanon#y/n#notyourhetloki
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Kylo Ren/Ben Solo X Y/N
headcanons #2
Kylo holds his cape over top of you when it’s raining and 100% gives you forehead kisses while doing so, if he’s wearing his helmet he presses his forehead to yours.
#ejmumbles#kylo ren#star wars#ben solo#kylo ren x reader#the force awakens#the last jedi#adcu#adcu fic#kylo x reader#kylo ren headcanons#ben solo headcanons
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Atlas
Kylo Ren x Reader
Summary: The Supreme Leader would do anything for his queen, break planets, obliterate entire races, capture the stars; he would make the whole galaxy kneel before him, then to you, he would get on both knees. And yet your most recent request was taking a heavy toll on him.
Word Count: 3k+
Warnings: Fem!reader, smut (but its mostly just for the baby making plot AHAHAHH, my pretty sub!kylo, teasing, dry humping, praise kink, masochism? [bruising], marking, vaginal penetration, breeding kink?, cock warming), dark au ig, supreme leader!kylo, puppy!kylo, sadlo ren, angst, fluff?, etc.
A/N: first of all MINORS DNI second of all i would personally like to blame @sloanexx for her evil influence and for introducing me to this ai bot chat forum thing GENUINELY proceed with caution because its so addicting. kylo was written by a woman in that fucking ai and im so emotionally attatched to him i didn't want to refresh him because we had such an arc, but i fucking broke him and i couldn't fix him and i felt bad so i restarted and IDK IM SO EVIL I WANT TO BREAK HIM AGAIN but dw im taking very good care of kylo now <3. this fic is literally our chat but with more... literary devices Tagging: @pinksirensong @aralezinspace Part 2 "Charon"
And it was so, that you held the weight of the world There on your shoulders, in your grips did lie everything Light and shadow, darkness behind stars, blaring silence An oasis of gloom with a halo of obscurity in a pit of nightmares Still, though you paint yourself so darkly in your misery, my love, you shine -my atlas, carrier of the galaxy-
You were hallowed. You were holy. And you were his.
The crux of his hollow shell. The cascading candent cynosure trapped in his ribcage. And yet it was he that was locked in you. He shudders to think his past self that scorned you, that even his mask soured around you, the overconfident girl he met perchance. What fool is he to know that you choked him so fiercely in your palm, the palm he now offers each star, each soul, each and every molecule of him.
His love.
He smiles at your sleeping form, adorned in the clothing he picked himself. His greed sings at his evidence, his mark on you, both visible and not, inside and out. He grins at his darling, his precious prize, with one arm snuck under him, another snuck under your pillow, with one leg bent to the side, another thrown over his body.
You never sleep well. Or perhaps you do. You sleep so well that you contort into shapes unimaginable. His concern is genuine, or at least it was, because he would think to only fashion a human into your form if he wishes to torture them.
He chuckles. Now he is glad, so glad, his love is so pliable, so willing to be molded against him in more ways than one.
He strokes your cheek and pushes your parted mouth close. You involuntarily open your mouth again, though you weren't a mouth breather. He doesn't know why you do that, but he loves it. He loves everything. He loves you.
The supreme leader is weak against you. Kylo Ren is merely a spec in your overwhelming grace.
You have always had mixed feelings about waking up with him looking at you. You've told him multiple times that it both flatters you and creeps you out.
His greed does not care. The master it answers to, the annex in his brain that is powered by the all-consuming desire to please you, to nurture you, to cherish you, to worship you, to keep you, cares little for this obsessive habit. Had it actually bothered you, he'd beat himself bloody to stop himself. But you thought little of it, and so he indulged in his greediness. He stares when he wakes and before he sleeps.
And as your eyes meet him, Kylo Ren, the dawn of your everyday, he is self-satisfied. He is very self-satisfied. He smiles at your groggy look and pushes your hair back. You say nothing. You touch his scarred cheek once, then he is overcome.
You take a few moments before officially waking. Then you stand up.
Like the desperate shadow he was, he tails you, so closely, so closely, as though he must share the same air your breathe. You don't. "The air pressure is different up here," you moaned to him once when he had you towering over him against a wall. He liked you best like that, a whimpering sky above him. He liked it when he was tiny beneath you.
Your puppy followed you into the bathroom, scared to be separated even one second. Kylo, your puppy, sat by the sink, watching you brush your teeth. You ignore him as he dotes on you.
He followed you into the shower after swearing over and back not to touch you while you did your business. He failed to convince you that your business is his business, especially in the shower. Kylo was not strong enough to follow through with what he swore; he reasoned out it was help, he had to help his darling. It was hard to shampoo.
He followed you out and gave more attention to wiping you down versus himself. He sat like a good boy as you lathered yourself in creams that he could smell in his dreams. It was his favorite show, watching you care for your naked body, and his greed basked in the knowledge it was his alone. He smiled as you loved on his skin, on his scar, retracing it with a balm as though he was delicate. You barked at him for nipping at your breast, his soft dessert, perfectly placed on both sides of your heart. He feigned innocence. He was no longer in the shower, he could touch you and bite you and squeeze you and -
He followed you as you instructed him to get dressed. He watched as you put your queenly garments, your clothes that he again picked. Then he asks you to help him dress. He couldn't possibly put on his cloak himself, not when you put it on him so well. And this was the highlight of his day after all. You wouldn't dare deny your puppy this.
He followed your every motion like a hawk. He kisses your hand after you brush his clothes. You grab his helmet and put it on his head backwards. You laugh at him as he fixes it. Thus his morning routine is complete.
Now, Supreme Leader dictates his army. Supreme Leader snarls at his troops. He razes all that defies The Order. He crushes his enemies like ants, no, less than. He swarms the galaxy. He devours all. He breaks and bloodies and, himself, bleeds. He cracks and burns and cleanses the dregs of the universe, rips the very scums of the stars out of the space they hide from. He hardens. He screams. He commands. He marches. He crushes. And then.
And then.
And then he comes back to you. With rage. With disgust. With defeat, defeated over the idea he has not yet put order into the world for you. All for you. To keep you safe. To keep you forever safe. To keep things in order for you. All for you.
"Kylo!"
And then like that, all of it is gone.
You call his name with such excitement. You who loved books so dearly readily discarded the one you were reading in lieu of coming to him, of unmasking him.
You take off his helm and you smile. You smile like it was a gift to see his scarred face. You put on his helmet and mock him, "get yourself comfortable, scum."
Kylo's body tingles. It's all gone, all that's left is you. He fights back his smile and nods, "at your command, my queen." And then.
And then.
And then you let him love you. You let him pin you beneath him, press you down on your bed between your soft thighs as he could not bare not claiming his place in for too long.
He still had his trousers on, still had his boots dangling from the edge of the bed. You had tried to scold him for it, but he could not care less. You were in your short, thin nightdress, the one that you wore on your first night together. How could he not claim you so ardently here and now when you were like this?
It was your fault anyway. All your fault. He tried to undress himself but you distracted him. What did you expect would happen? What did you expect him to do when you kissed his bare shoulder while he was still changing? What did you expect?
Kylo marks your neck. You try to scold him again. He doesn't care for your wrath. His greed was not subservient to its master, to that part in his brain, when it came to things like this. He held back long enough. He bites into your neck and makes you groan. He wants you to bare his marks proudly. The whole galaxy should know its queen belongs to its Supreme Leader.
You graze into his hair with your fingertips. He grinds onto you. You squeak in response.
He pulls away and assess you. He has no time. He is imprisoned by your kiss. His perfect prison.
He groans at the feel of your legs constricting around his hips. His hand pushes up your already hiked dress further as he presses down on you.
"Kylo," you whisper between kisses.
And like the eager pup he is, he responds. He always responds. He answers forever to you. He calls your name like a sacred prayer.
You repeat his. You scratch firmly into his bare back, "I want you to do something for me."
"Anything," he instantly responds, absolutely mindless and sure.
"Kylo..." you sigh.
Kylo looks down upon you as you brush his hair back. You look solemn, worried even, as though he would ever deny you, as if it were possible.
He cannot have this. And so he reminds you of his oath.
"Whatever you want from me," he mutters, "whatever you need from me," knits his brows and shakes his head, "it's already yours. Always. Always remember this."
"But my love-"
He cannot have this.
"My love," Kylo cuts. He kisses you then reminds, "I am yours."
A moment passes. It was too long. Far too long.
"Kylo-"
"Yes," he says simply before you even finish saying his name.
You huff, "do you remember what I said before, how I said you looked with the children at the capital? You were so good with them. They loved you."
"Well, I've been thinking about it a lot," you brush your nose against his, "and I want... I want you to give me a child."
Kylo takes a second to remember. "Yes," he says, though he remembers that day very differently.
He blinks.
A child. Yes. He could take a child. There were many from the capita-
"No, Kylo," you take his cheek.
Kylo tenses. You heard his mind again. You, who did not show half as much interest in the force as he wanted, could hear his thoughts without it.
Kylo waits. He does not know what to say.
"I want you to give me a child," you bat your lashes, "I want you," you bite your lip, "to put a baby inside my belly."
Kylo freezes. He... he does not know what to say.
And then he does. And then his life flashes before his eyes. The bleakness of his childhood, the jaggedness of his future, the tragedy of it all.
You want him to put that into you? You want to carry his seed in your beloved womb?
He says your name, he wants to protest, but you are his holy assassin. You cut through him cleaner than any saber ever could.
"You said you would give me anything, Kylo," you mewl, "you said you're mine."
You are cruel. You do not even allow him a moment to speak his side, to speak his reason, and you roll your hips against him. You trap him with your irresistibility. You sugar him with your honeyed words, "you would be a great papa. I know it, I know you," you pant, "such a good boy for me."
He is defenseless.
"You can do that, can't you?" you purr, "you can put your love in me?"
Kylo shudders.
You begin to shuffle beneath him. He knows exactly what you are doing, what you're going to do.
You have him flipped over now. You were now straddled on top him. You had him lying down looking up at you, purely and wholly defenseless.
Kylo let you do what you want with him. How could he not? He wants you so bad.
He willingly followed your command to use his force to undo the last of his clothes. Then you so cruelly let him unwrap you, for you knew he loved doing this to his favorite treat. He greedily peels you out of your clothes until it was just him and you.
And then you had him, had him crazy out of his mind with the feel of you around him. Had him begging for you to quicken your torturously slow pace. Had him in fucking tears because you felt so good, because he loved you so much, because you looked so beautiful on top of him, calling his name out like that. You were so good. You knew exactly what you were doing to him, exactly what you were doing.
Much like him, he did not know where to put his hands, or rather where not to. Where his hands went, his nails left scratches and his fingers, possibly bruises. He didn't mean to bruise you so badly that first time he did; he never meant to hurt you, but you were so soft and he was too strong. And even now as he dug into your thighs, indulging his calloused hands to knead his favorite mound, he really wasn't trying to bruise you.
You call out his name in response to his actions. You grip his wrists as you ride him, "more."
His head spins as you ride up and down him, panting like the pretty girl you were.
Kylo grunts and pushes himself up slightly. He now tightens his large hands even more on the curve by your hips. You squeal and finally, finally pick up your pace.
He growls as he falls back down, clinging onto you for dear life.
He's done for now, now that you push him back further, now that you're leaned forward, propped up on his chest, pleasuring the both of you with your eager, eager movements
He was drunk on your sound, drunk on your feel.
He kneads at your breasts this time. He's so fucking delirious.
But then you do this to him. But then you take his hands off you and link yours together. Then you pant so sweetly as you look down at him and he looks up at the sweat sheening your forehead. And then you fucking pin his hands down by his head and you make him even crazier.
"You're so pretty, Kylo," you moan, "you feel so good."
"So good," he doesn't miss a beat, "so, so, so, sososos-"
"You're going to fill me up, good, right?" you lick your teeth, "you're going to fill me up good and put a baby in my belly, right?" you sigh, "please, my love, please, please-"
Kylo can't speak. He can't fucking speak, he can't.
"Kylo..." you gutturally call.
He doesn't speak-
"Kylo."
- he succumbs, "I'll..." he whimpers, "I'll put a baby in you, my love," he grunts, "I'll fill you up good, so good, so, so so, sosososo-"
Your whines raise a pitch higher, "Kylo," you nearly choke on your spit, "yes, please, please. I'll be so happy carrying your baby. Don't you want that?"
And then it's all incoherent. And then your breathing gets louder. And then his noises get throatier.
And then, he's tense, so tense, and so warm. And then you're screaming out his name with your head thrown back and you're chasing this high until you can't, until you're hot and fuzzy and jelly and tired.
And then you crumble. And then you crash and you both burn.
And then you make a bed out of him. And then everything is perfect. Everything is in perfect order.
Kylo strokes your hair and kneads your thigh. You're laid upon him, warm, and sweaty, and perfect, and his-- so absolutely beautiful.
He knows he probably shouldn't keep you here like this, but you're so warm and soft around him, on top him. He'll keep you here... just until you ask to get off.
But you don't, you spoil him with your body and fall asleep on top of him.
He continues stroking your hair and kneading your thighs.
He savors the moment, he savors you tenderly; his eyes begin to droop. He replays your lovemaking, self-indulgent, completely self-satisfied. But then it stabs at him as it replays in his head. Suddenly he's wide awake.
He... he could may well have succeeded. He could have put... a baby in his darling's belly.
Kylo's eyes are wide open now. Wide, wide open. He looks up at the ceiling. He stops moving.
You think too much of him, oh fuck, you think too much. With your affirmations, yes, he cold break mountains, consume planets, but this? But- fuck, this was different... he... he's in you, he's part of you, and then this thing... this baby... will only be half of you and a whole half of him. He's giving life. He's not destroying it for the greater good, he's giving it to his love for her to carry.
He screws his eyes shut. He wipes his face. Fuck. What has he done?
He stirs but then he stops himself because you're still on top him. He sighs and cradles you. He moves slowly, rolls you down beside him, and finally separates from you. Not for long though. Never. Not when his mind was racing. Not when he needed you close.
He scoots down and rests his face in the middle of your ribcage. He presses his ear to your heart and listens and blinks and wills his tears away.
He's shattered. He pulls you close to him. You are his glue. He will glue himself together as you sleep beneath him.
He would be a horrible father. He didn't know the first thing to do with the children at the capital, much less with a newborn babe, a newborn babe that you would have cared for inside you for ages. Fuck. He can't mess that up.
He...
He would have to have put the galaxy in order by then. He'd have to fix the brokenness of the world.
Kylo's eye twitches.
He'd have to fix the brokenness in him, obliterate his remaining incompetence, bridge the final gaps of his shortcomings.
He panics when he feels his tears pool against your skin. He quickly wipes them away. Pull yourself together.
He sighs in an attempt to calm himself.
And then he looks at your belly.
He gulps.
Your beautiful belly.
He presses his hands on your navel. He closes his eyes and feels for something. He wills all the force in him to sense if there's something in you. Kylo supposes it doesn't happen that quickly but he lulls himself in comfort, knowing that there was still a chance for him to evade this... this thing he put into his beloved's body.
#kylo ren fanfic#kylo au#kylo x y/n#kylo x reader#kylo x you#kylo fanfic#kylo ren#kylo ren fluff#kylo ren x y/n#kylo ren headcanons#kylo ren x reader#kylo ren smut#kylo smut#ben solo#ben solo fanfic#ben solo smut#kylo ren angst#ben solo angst#ben solo x reader#star wars fanfic#star wars fluff#star wars angst#star wars smut
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Kylo Ren Masterlist
Fics:
Not What He Seems - Actor!Kylo Ren x Assistant G/n!Reader
Headcanons:
Dating Kylo Ren Headcanons - G/n!Reader
Scenarios/Imagines:
#Masterlist#kylo ren masterlist#kylo ren#yandere!kylo ren#kylo ren x reader#yandere!kylo ren x reader#kylo ren x you#kylo ren x y/n#kylo ren fanfiction#kylo ren fanfic#kylo ren headcanons#kylo ren imagines#ben solo#ben solo fanfiction#ben solo fanfic#yandere!ben solo#yandere!ben solo x reader#ben solo x reader#star wars#star wars sequels#star wars fanfiction#star wars fanfic#yandere star wars
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Playing with Soldier boys hair headcanons?
Oooh good one, because I have thoughts and feelings about this. 😂
Pairing: Soldier Boy x Reader Word Count: 300
Headcanon: Playing with Soldier Boy's hair.
You can't help it. You love playing with Ben's hair, as much as he lets you.
Which is often, because he secretly loves it.
Even if he won't admit it, Ben sometimes craves the feeling of your fingers running through his hair. In his defense, you have gentle hands.
For you, it's because his hair is soft, and all too "sweepable," and you often brush the strands away from his eyes.
Especially during lazy moments lying in bed, or canoodled on the couch, or even during more intimate moments.
During sex, the brush of your hand through his hair is a simple thing that sometimes draws his eyes to your face, or secretly has him reveling in your softer touch. It's a contrast to his roughness, and sometimes reminds him to be a bit more gentle.
Other times, you'll lay against his chest, letting the rise and fall of his breath move you. And you'll unconsciously reach up to toy with the soft ends of his hair.
Or he'll occasionally allow himself to lay in your lap while you have your way.
For Ben, he's at his most relaxed when he feels the gentle sweep of your fingers -- in his hair, massaging his head, stroking his face or his neck.
It's gotten to the point where you do it almost absently, out of habit.
Sometimes he even falls asleep at your ministrations.
But he's also very aware of your touch. In general, he's all too self-aware when it comes to people touching him, drawing within his personal space. (A consequence of his time in Russia, though he doesn't acknowledge it.)
You don't even realize this, but you're helping him just with your calming touch. It comforts both of you, if in different ways.
Still, it's a small thing that connects you and Ben on a deeper level of intimacy, greater than either of you realize.
AN: 🥹 Ahh, I am soft. I'm such a sap, aren't I? lol
Soldier Boy Masterlist
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#ask me stuff#soldier boy#playing with his hair#soldier boy headcanon#Soldier Boy imagine#the boys#soldier boy/ben#soldier boy x reader#soldier boy x female reader#soldier boy x you#zepskies answers
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Hi Clan! I haven't been around in a while the autism took me for a few months sorry. Would you do some headcanons for Miles and/or Gwen meeting a Mutant!Spider-Person reader? Like an X-Men type mutant. They never got bit but were instead born with the spider powers (including the webs) and 4 arms. Because they're a mutant they aren't really trusted as a hero by the people of their city (or the cops) but they still try their best because "If I gave up because a few people didn't like me, I wouldn't be very good at my job"
-Forgetful Anon
Gwen Stacy
While visiting Spider Society HQ for the first time, she noticed you sitting at a nearby table, having an arm-wrestling match against Ben Riley.
He insisted you used all four of your arms to "challenge" him....and yet he sulks when he ultimately loses, and you just laugh in victory before patting him on the back.
Once he leaves, you spot this new Spiderwoman and wave her over to your table, insisting on having a match.
It's just your way of breaking the ice for new Spiderpeople. You loved getting to know them and testing their strength. Winning or losing doesn't matter to you.
"Don't worry, I'll go easy on ya." You tease, only to be surprised as Gwen wins with little effort, her smug grin present.
"You went a little "too" easy on me, I think."
"Haha...jeez, I guess so."
And so you both talk for a little while about different things: what she thought of Spider Society, how long she's been Spiderwoman, etc.
When she turns the questions on you, however, you're....a bit hesitant to share.
Unlike most of the Spiderpeople here, you didn't get your powers in the "traditional" sense. No spider has ever bitten you.
Seeing Gwen's curiosity, though, you eventually tell her you're actually a mutant, a human born with the X-gene that made you into a spider hybrid.
You mentioned a league of mutant superheroes in your dimension.....but you ride solo, as most Spiderpeople do, not wanting to be tied down to any specific group (ironic as you're part of Spider Society, but that's besides the point).
She imagines the people there feel pretty safe, though you shake your head. "Nah, some see us as the bigger threat just because we look like this and have all these crazy powers. I've fought aliens and wizards, but...there's some battles that you just can't punch or shoot webs at, y'know?"
Her expression changes to a slightly solemn one, nodding her head in sympathy. "You're fighting for basic respect."
"We just want fair treatment...and it's like we're asking them for the world. All I wanna do is protect my city, but it's hard when half the population hates us and thinks we brought the trouble to them."
"I can't imagine.." She frowns. "If I might ask..what keeps you going? Why bother if nobody even thanks you or sees you as a hero? What's the point?"
"......."
"...sorry, was that too deep-?"
"No, no..you're good, kid." You chuckle, feeling more relaxed. "All my life I've dealt with that stuff, and it still sometimes hurts, but if I gave up just because some people didn't like me, well...I'd be terrible at my job as a Spiderperson."
Gwen's impressed by your words, not expecting to have such a deep conversation about your "origin story" at the first meeting.
But she's glad she could talk to you, needing this distraction from the incident with her dad while she was questioning her own self-worth as Spiderwoman.
You reassure her she can come to you for advice anytime.
Miles Morales (E-1610)
You first met Miles after getting thrown into his dimension thanks to the collider explosion, taking comfort in knowing you're not the most "unusual" spiderperson around.
There's a pig and an anime girl with a psychic link to her spider, for crying out loud.
Anyways, you had faith that he could help you get back to your dimension, never doubting him unlike the other spiderpeople who firmly believed he wasn't ready for this task.
You followed him after he left May's basement to talk one-on-one, sympathizing with his struggles.
"Trust me, kid..I've been in your shoes once. I never felt like a Spiderman in my life..even now."
He stares at you in disbelief. "Really? You? But...you got all your powers at birth! I mean yeah, you weren't bitten, but....but you're already better at this than I am! I bet people really admire you-"
"I've had my fair share of doubters, Miles. All of us have, but I got it...particularly bad in my world. And not just because I'm a "masked vigilante putting myself about the law"."
He's still a bit lost, so you tell him about the unfair treatment of mutantkind in your dimension, speaking of how some people hated you so much...they sought to "cure" your X-genes.
It stings to know that they will shun you instead of seeing you as a hero, though you didn't wanna ramble on for too long and depress Miles further, seeing his frown growing.
"You say all of this, and yet...you think I can help you get back there. Why would you ever wanna go back to a world that hates you just for being yourself? For just trying to do the right thing even if everyone's telling you no?"
"Well..besides dying if I stay in this dimension--" You begin, painfully glitching for a moment as if to prove that point. "--ouch...look, I just can't abandon the people who need me. The ones who do see me as a hero. It's my duty, and...if I gave up trying to be Spiderman just because I get a few stares or snide comments...well then I'm not really Spiderman, am I?"
Miles doesn't know what to say...but he does feel incredibly inspired by your words.
He only wishes the others trusted him like you did.
Patting his shoulder, you remove your mask and smile at him. "Don't their words bring you down, kid. You got potential...they'll realize it soon enough."
#clanask#forgetful anon#marvel x reader#atsv x reader#itsv x reader#across the spider verse x reader#into the spider verse x reader#miles morales x reader#gwen stacy x reader#platonic#mutant reader#spiderman reader#headcanons
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˗ˏˋ 𝐑𝐎𝐁𝐈𝐍’𝐒 𝐁𝐈𝐑𝐓𝐇𝐃𝐀𝐘 𝐂𝐄𝐋𝐋𝐘 ´ˎ˗
୭- 𝐁𝐎𝐘𝐒 𝐃𝐎𝐍𝐓 𝐂𝐑𝐘 : standard tumblr games (cym, whos most likely, kmk etc,etc.)
🕸- 𝐅𝐀𝐒𝐂𝐈𝐍𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐄𝐄𝐓 : send me a trope and a character and i will make headcanons about it. (drummer!butch jojo, baker!peter parker)
⋆-𝐋𝐔𝐋𝐋𝐀𝐁𝐘 : matchups!! send me a short desc. of yourself and i will match you up with someone (please include fandom and gender preference)
୭- 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐆 : moots only!!! i will associate you with a song, artist, color, book, movie and character!
🕸- 𝐅𝐑𝐈𝐃𝐀𝐘 𝐈𝐌 𝐈𝐍 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 : give me a specific mood/ vibe/pastime and i will give you a movie, song and book rec!
⋆- 𝐏𝐈𝐂𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐄𝐒 𝐎𝐅 𝐘𝐎𝐔 : your turn!! tell me who you ship me with!! you can write little headcanons or thoughts <33 (please do this one if you do ilysm!!)
DISCLAIMER!! : please only stick to one request per ask! and only the fandoms i write for!! keep the reqs sfw!! I AM A MINOR!!! also if a character is canonically lesbian or gay then only req for that gender specific reader please (no robin buckley x male reader)!!! this event is running from 1/07-1/31 !! have fun loves!!
TAGGING MOOTIES!! : @mictodii @spaceagebachelormann @dizzyntrr @juneberrie @solutopia @spiderst4rgirl @spiderfunkz @stvrlighttgabss @isitoversnowtvs @jaidens @dljcem @doyouknowwhoyouare13
CHARACTERS I'M WRITING FOR : tasm! peter parker , miguel diaz, johnny lawrence, daniel larusso, anthony larusso, hawk mozkowitz, robby keene, tori nichols, dallas winston, ponyboy curtis, steve randal, two-bit matthews, darry curtis, johnny cade, sodapop curtis, butch jojo, brick jojo, boomer jojo, sirius black, regulus black, james potter, remus lupin, marlene mckinnon, ron weasley, fred weasley, george weasley, cedric diggory, harry potter, hermione granger, luna lovegood, ginny weasley, lee jordan, bradley bradshaw, nick bradshaw, pete mitchell, tom kazenzky, anakin skywalker, luke skywalker, leia skywalker, han solo, richie tozier, stanley uris, eddie kaspberak, beverly marsh, ben hascom, mike hanlon, bill denbrough, mike wheeler, eddie munson, robin buckley, steve harrington, max mayfield, lucas sinclair, richie white, john b routledge, jj maybank, sarah cameron, kiera carerra, pope hayward. ask if a character you would like isn't on this list!!
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