Just a Joke
Summary: When Mia gets hungry and tries to make herself dinner, her clumsy nature gets the best of her causing Edward and Esme to step in.
Characters: Esme Cullen, Edward Cullen, Bella Swan & Mia Cullen (OC)
Request (from anon): Hello! For June requests how about, “Don’t worry, I got this.” & “Come on, take my hand.” For Twilight pretty please 💜
Content Warnings: N/A
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Please take a moment to tell me what y'all think! Reviews and comments are always appreciated. 😌❤️
Mia glanced up from her book as her stomach rumbled, the sound audible to her, and likely to her brother, but not to her brother’s girlfriend settled at the other end of the couch.
They had been sitting there on the couches in near silence ever since school let out, devouring their respective books for hours as Edward practiced piano in the next room over. Since the rest of Mia’s siblings left for Denali straight from the school parking lot, they’d been left entirely undisturbed. It was a rare gift, that, and Bella hadn’t pulled her eyes from the book since settling, completely absorbed in the pages before her.
Edward probably should have been with the others in Denali. He needed to hunt just as much as the rest of them, but he’d elected to stay behind, something he was doing more and more often these days—trading his lengthier hunting trips with the others for short stints that allowed him to remain only borderline satiated, but far closer to home.
Mia loved her brother, and there was a time when being apart for any significant portion of time had been difficult, but she wasn’t entirely certain if Edward’s near-constant presence these days was a gift or not, though she supposed it divided her parents’ attention a bit. The presence of Bella gave her parents someone else to fuss over, too.
Esme had gone out shortly after they arrived home, giving the kids their space as she often did, but Mia knew she would return soon. Carlisle would be back from his shift at the hospital any time now, too, and Mia was certain it was only a matter of time before the parents descended, soliciting their opinions on dinner, ready for the rare opportunity to cook for two rather than one.
Mia couldn’t remember the last time they’d let her cook anything for herself, so rare was it that they gave up the opportunity to dote. The opportunity to engage in something so entirely human as cooking. Mia liked to joke that she'd never survive on her own since they let her do so little in the kitchen. It wasn't far from the truth.
Mia watched Bella for a moment, trying to decide whether or not to interrupt the girl's reading, the only sound between them Edward's piano and another rumble of Mia's stomach.
“Bella,” Mia whispered, nudging the girl with her foot when the whispering didn’t provide any result other than a shift in Edward’s playing to something quieter and slower in tempo.
Mia rolled her eyes, glaring at her brother through the wall for his nosiness.
“Hmm?” Bella asked after a moment, finally pulling her eyes from the book as she finished her paragraph. She blinked as if she'd forgotten where she was. As if by pulling her eyes from the words on the page she was suddenly somewhere else entirely.
“Are you hungry?” Mia asked.
Bella glanced back to the book for a moment before meeting Mia’s eye, a grimace on her lips. “Starved, actually.”
Mia nodded, standing up from the couch and depositing her blanket and book. “Then I’ll make us something.”
Mia strode across the floor and through the next room where Edward had already stood to meet her.
“What do you want?” he asked. “I’ll make it.”
Mia waved her brother off. “I can cook for myself, Edward.”
Edward raised an eyebrow. "Since when?"
"Since I can," she answered, pushing him out of her path. “Don’t worry, I got this.”
Edward followed after her. He was poised to argue, poised to insist that his sister take up his offer, but Bella cleared her throat from the threshold of the living room, giving him a pointed look.
“Leave her alone, Edward.”
“Yeah, Edward, leave me alone,” Mia echoed, throwing a smirk at him as she then gave a grateful smile to Bella. Edward raised his hands in surrender and Mia turned away, practically skipping to the kitchen.
Mia skid to a halt as she entered the pristine kitchen. The cabinets and refrigerator were fully stocked, or as fully stocked as the family ever dared to be considering it was only Mia who ever actually ate anything. She was feeling snacky, uncertain that she had enough patience in her to cook an entire meal when her stomach already felt so empty, but she diligently looked to the paper where Esme had already planned the meals for the week anyway. Spinach lasagna—one of Mia’s favorites—was next on the docket, but that would take well over an hour to prepare and cook.
As hungry as she was, Mia wouldn't last that long, and yet she strived to make a point.
She was capable of cooking for herself.
Capable of following a simple recipe.
Mia moved around the kitchen, pulling one of the cookbooks out as she headed to her favorite cabinet—the snack cabinet—grateful that there was still something satisfying and snacky left there, some healthy version of a chip that Mia had come to like at a certain point because it wasn’t as if her family was going to allow actual junk food into the house.
She poured out a portion into a bowl before walking to the living room where Edward and Bella were seated on the couch, in a vaguely respectful position, though Mia hadn’t missed the flush of Bella’s cheeks and the awkward positioning.
She had given them plenty of notice, walking with purpose and making certain that her steps were able to be heard.
“Appetizer,” Mia announced as she set the bowl on the coffee table before walking back to the kitchen.
Mindlessly snacking on her own bowl of pseudo-chips, Mia flipped through the book and found the lasagna recipe. She had seen the process probably hundreds of times, settled at the counter while she watched her mother or father or one of her siblings putting the meal together for her.
There were times when her family went through the process of making the pasta by hand. There were times when the noodles came from a box. Mia knew without a thought that she would be doing the latter.
Wiping the chip dust on her hands off on her jeans, Mia moved around the room, pulling out the necessary ingredients. The noodles, the sauce ingredients, the cheeses, the spinach. Mia mixed the ricotta mixture together and started the sauce on the stove before she started searching the cabinets for the glass baking dish.
She searched the bottom row of cabinets twice before deciding it wasn't in its usual spot. Biting her lip, Mia surveyed the upper cabinets. Two cabinets in, she spotted the dish on the top shelf, clearly put away by one of her brothers.
Mia reached out for it, but it was just out of reach even when she leaned on the counter, lifting up onto the tips of her toes. She could get a good grip on it if she got up on the counter, but Mia knew better. She was clumsy and it wasn't safe and she had no interest in visiting her father in the emergency room on a Friday afternoon.
So Mia refrained, instead pulling a pair of tongs from one of the nearby drawers. She just needed to pull it down a few inches and then she could catch it in her other hand.
Mia set about it, standing on the tips of her toes once again for a little extra height. She reached out, setting her tongs around the glass handle of the dish. She eased the dish towards the edge, all of her focus there until she heard the gentle click of the door to her left.
She pulled her eyes from the dish to see her mother standing there, back from running her errands in town.
Mia flinched as dish tipped from the shelf. She let out a scream as the glass shattered around her upon impact, shards littering the floor at her feet.
Edward was there in the doorway less than a second later, soon enough to witness Mia’s fear shift to annoyance as she cursed under her breath.
“Come on, take my hand,” Esme said softly, extending a hand to guide her daughter safely through the field of glass littering the kitchen floor. “We'll clean this up and Edward will get you another dish so you can finish cooking,” she said, nodding at Edward and then to the cabinets.
“It smells delicious,” Esme told Mia as she gathered her daughter to her side, an arm around her shoulders.
Edward was unable to stop himself from snorting as he crossed the room, easily stepping around the glass. He was sure it smelled fine to a human, but to him…and to his mother…whatever his sister was putting together smelled nothing less than abhorrent.
“Yeah, maybe if you like dirt,” he said, earning a sharp glance from Esme by way of reprimand.
"Ah, yes. Of course." Mia pulled out of her mother's hold. “Because you prefer the entrancing scent of blood. I can step on a piece of glass if that would be—”
Mia stretched a bare foot out towards the glass, barely making it within a few inches before a pair of deceptively strong arms lifted her from the floor.
“Hey! Put me down!” Mia complained as she hung draped over Esme’s shoulder. It looked ridiculous, the woman holding the teenaged girl in such a position when she was barely five and a half feet tall.
"Please?" Mia added, but Esme made no effort to let her down.
“Not in my kitchen,” Esme answered as she carried Mia to the edge of the room. "You’re officially banned."
“Mom, it was just a joke, I swear,” Mia said, her arms gesturing to accompany her words even as she dangled upside down. “Look, Edward’s even laughing.”
Esme twisted to glance at her son, and the look she gave alone wiped a bit of the smirk from Edward's face.
He wasn't laughing at his sister's "joke." Truth be told, Edward hadn’t found it particularly funny either, but he couldn’t help but chuckle at the image of Esme swinging his sister over her shoulder and carrying her around. Even as Esme looked at him, the grin on his face grew once again. He couldn't help it, but then he met Esme's eye once again.
As Edward’s face sobered a bit further, Esme lowered Mia to the floor in front of her.
“Well, you’ll both have to excuse me for not finding the notion of my daughter slicing herself open very funny,” she said, frowning at her daughter and then at Edward. “I don’t believe your father would find it very funny either.”
“I know, I know.” Mia sighed, forcing herself to take a breath before she gave a proper response. Even if it was only a joke, she knew her parents could be testy about that sort of thing, her father especially. “I’m sorry. There’s really no need to revoke kitchen privileges. I promise I wasn’t actually going to—”
“Maybe it’s for the best, Mia,” Edward interrupted from where he now stood at the counter, his nose wrinkling as he hovered over the lasagna components. “This really does smell like—”
Esme opened her mouth to interrupt—to chastise, but she simply rose an eyebrow at him instead.
“It was just a joke,” Edward answered.
“Not a very funny one,” Mia answered.
“Alright,” Esme said, stepping back in front of Mia, meeting both her and Edward’s eyes in turn before continuing. “That’s enough. Both of you take your jokes and get out of my kitchen.”
Mia was poised to complain…poised to continue making her case for being allowed to stay and finish up her dinner, but Edward was too quick and too strong, and he swept his sister up in his arms before she could say another word.
Esme only rolled her eyes fondly as Edward carried a complaining Mia away. While the sound of children arguing may have frayed the patience of some mothers, Esme found she didn’t mind the sound of Edward and Mia teasing. Just as she didn't mind the opportunity to finish putting together dinner for Mia and Bella.
Even if Edward was right.
The lasagna did smell like dirt.
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