#being where i will be there will be high proximity to other people as crazy as i am. so maybe

[sirfrogsworth]

Meeting my longtime artist and good friend, Chris, IN REAL LIFE!

So, I hadn't been to a restaurant in over a decade. I can't even remember which restaurant since it was so long ago. But in the past few weeks I've now been to TWO restaurants.

I am becoming a social butterfly. 

And it is exhausting.

But also good.

First I reconnected with my high school best friend, John.

And that went great.

But then the opportunity to see my friend Chris (a.k.a @whosthewhatnow ) came up only a few days later. And this close proximity of social events scared me a bit, but I have been feeling much better since they figured out my heart thing, so I decided to try and do both things even though they were only a few days apart. 

The key to this was strategic resting. As soon as I got home from seeing John, I got in bed and I didn't get out of it until it was time to see Chris. And that was just enough recovery time to pull this off. Typically a short outing requires 2-3 days of rest after. 

I had never met Chris in real life. He has done nearly all of the artwork for my website and comics over the past decade. And he was a main character in my CRAPPRnauts series.

We know each other so well and it is crazy that we've never seen each other with our very own eyeballs.

He is such an amazing artist. He works fast and he adds so many cool extra details that you can stare at his comic panels multiple times and catch a new joke or easter egg each time. He is a dream to work with and my Corg Life series was only successful because he did such a wonderful job bringing Otis to life in comic form. 

So we decided to meet up at a restaurant with his friend Michael and then I was going to take a nice portrait of him after dinner. Chris had never had a professional photo taken of himself and I decided to fix that.

I told him I had a mobile photography setup. Which, in reality, is a trunk full of lights and stands and other various camera gear that I definitely won't need, but bring anyway. It's "mobile" in that it all fits in my car if you are good at Tetris (which I am).

The restaurant was downtown and I had visions of St. Louis's famous Gateway Arch in the background of Chris's portrait. I thought that would be such a cool shot. I could see it in my head and I even dreamed about it.

So I got in my car and headed downtown and my GPS told me to exit at 249B. But I kept looking and I couldn't see the sign for 249B.

This is how much road I had left when I finally was able to see the exit for 249B.

So I ended up taking 249A and going straight to East St. Louis.

Which, if you believe the headlines, is not a place you ever want to be.

Google Maps and I have been having issues lately. They also tried to get me to take the spooky way home that night, but thankfully I actually knew the non-spooky way back from when I used to go to Cardinal games with my parents as a kid.

My short term memory was trashed by shock therapy. And so was a lot of my long term memory. But it finally came through in a pinch and remembered something useful.

I only had to loop around and cross a bridge so I didn't really do anything but touch the edge of East St. Louis. I was mostly concerned about being late for dinner more than its scary reputation. Usually those news stories about a place being "dangerous" are actually just racist and hurtful to people stuck in poverty. I mean, technically my house is in a "dangerous" neighborhood, and we do have trouble with petty crime in some spots, but aside from a few dinged-up mailboxes, I've never felt unsafe in my home.

On the way back to regular St. Louis I could see the Arch on the horizon at sunset and it was kind of magical. And I wasn't able to get a good shot of it, but it sure looked pretty from my point of view. 

My photos kind of remind me of the beginning of movies like Training Day where they are trying to show you gritty, dutch angle shots of the city out of the car window to give you a sense of the location.

As I approached the restaurant I invented a new genre I call "stoplight photography." The sky was orange and the streets of St. Louis were just asking to be photographed. But I wasn't willing to die to get neat photos, so I just took them at every red light.

The big trick was trying to edit the dark area at the top of my windshield out of the photos to make it look like I didn't take these pictures from my car.

After a 15 minute detour through Illinois I arrived at my destination—a Mexican place called Rosalita's. It had a beautiful sign, so I took that literal sign as a metaphorical sign it was a nice place to get a quesadilla. 

Dinner was great. Both signs were right and their quesadilla was very tasty. Chris and I both got one, so we are quesadilla twins. The waitress was one of those "I can remember your order without writing anything down" types. And I am one of those, "I get anxiety when things aren't written down" types. And, to her credit, she did not forget our orders. But she did forget to give us silverware and napkins. So I still feel like my anxiety was valid. 

We told sad stories of the pups we lost. But we also had a lot of fun and laughed and I got to meet Michael who turned out to be an absolute mensch. I sometimes have trouble meeting new people with my social anxiety, but he was very affable and made me feel comfortable with his presence almost right away. He was a fan of Otis and mentioned he still has a Super Otis shirt. I always get choked up hearing that Otis is still loved. Hopefully we get to meet again. 

Dinner ended and it was picture time.

I asked Chris if he wanted the high effort photo or the low effort photo. Either we figure out how to get to the Arch or we find a spot near the restaurant and just take his portrait there. Chris and Michael had a driver because they were coming from a big conference and getting to the Arch would have been complicated. So we decided to go with the low effort option. 

I found a cool shop nearby that had an LED wall that changed to all sorts of different colors. And I thought that would make a neat background and give a colorful edge light on Chris's face. I pulled my car near that spot and started unloading my trunk full of photo gear.

I think Chris and Michael were a little overwhelmed when I started pulling camera gear out of my trunk like a clown pulling an endless handkerchief out of his mouth. But as far as photo setups go, it was actually pretty minimal. 

Light, giant battery, light stand, umbrella, tripod, camera, rolling walker with seat.

My dad's old rollator came in clutch because I wanted to shoot from a low angle and it is hard for me to bend down. In fact, I think I'm going to look into getting an all terrain version so I can do more outdoor photoshoots.

I started shooting in the middle of a downtown sidewalk. And I was super anxious. I could not focus (my brain, not my camera). I was very distracted with all of the people walking by and staring. I was not sure if any of the photos were turning out. I wasn't even sure if they were in focus (my camera, not my brain) because I had not yet had my lens calibrated. But down the street there was a guy with an old school boombox playing random music. His music helped to drown out the ambient noise and gave me some comfort.

I had no clue if the photos were any good, but when I got home and checked them on my computer, I realized I have 12 years of experience and muscle memory built up. I probably should have just trusted myself because the photos all turned out great.

I think Chris can now officially say he has had a professional portrait taken of himself.

This photo has been officially loved by Chris's girlfriend and mother.

There is no greater seal of approval and I am honored.

I was able to comp in any of the colors the wall displayed from other shots in case Chris is feeling a little more green in the future.

A literal rainbow of options.

I also liked this one, though it is a little more "environmental portrait" than regular portrait.

And I got some nice photos of our little group to help us remember the night. 

And I got a bunch of photos of Chris making silly faces like Calvin at his school photoshoot. 

I love this woman's reaction to our little impromptu sidewalk photo shenanigans.

After we said our goodbyes and I gave my friend a hug, I was a little bummed I didn't get to photograph him at the Arch like I had dreamed.

But then I realized I had my own car and it was capable of taking me places. (I actually haven't gotten used to that after not driving for nearly 15 years.)

So I decided to drive a few blocks over to Kiener Plaza—a park with a view of the Arch. 

TO BE CONTINUED...

[hyunebunx]

Hihi! I saw your repost of the kiss prompt list, not sure if this is where I'm supposed to request but I think ♥️ Spiderman kiss x Han would be freaking adorable 😭 Obviously if you don't feel up to it don't feel obligated to or anything 🫶

˖˙ ᰋ ── ♥️ - 'spiderman kiss'

﹙ʚɞ˚﹚. genre: fluff (and a little bit suggestive)

﹙ʚɞ˚﹚. a/n: i swear your request came just as i watched 'no way home' for the first time!! it brought back my love for the franchise so ofc i had to write this!! i had so much fun, i hope you'll enjoy reading it too and that i did your idea justice🩷

You haven’t always believed in superheroes. Most people around you thought they were roaming the city and keeping everyone safe, the saviours the world needed coming to life straight from the pages of a comic book. On the other hand, you thought it was stupid and very unlikely, no matter how much proof they bothered to show just to bring you to their unhinged side. Ignorance is bliss as they say but, in this case, you genuinely believed they all went crazy in their desperate attempt at holding onto their happiness, the normalcy ripped away when the strange disasters hit your town one by one.

So, their existence was all nonsense to you until the unexpected happened. You started dating one.

Now, if you were the one to broadcast it for the whole world to hear, they would be the ones calling you crazy. And you wouldn’t blame them – you did not budge or bother to entertain anything Han Jisung was blabbering about, powers and other absurd stuff until he showed you.

To prove he wasn’t messing with you or just maladaptive daydreaming, on your first date, Jisung took you around the city to show you all of his favorite places. Not by car, or on foot, like anyone would expect, but from above. Yes, above. Without much explanation, in his red and blue latex suit, Jisung turned to you with a lone question.

“Do you trust me?”

Frankly, you did not, with it being your first date and all but you figured since he was cute, you might as well entertain him to score that second outing.

With a nod from you, his beautiful face disappeared behind a goofy spider mask as he instructed you to hug him tight and never let go, no matter what. You hesitated, arms going for his middle before he gently redirected them, one by one, to wrap around his neck, the proximity flustering you both.

You didn’t think your heart could speed up even more until he hugged you by the waist and suddenly jumped, finding yourself several feet in the air in a split second. Spider web seemed to come out of his palms, sticking to the high skyscrapers effortlessly and swinging you around the city like it was the most natural means of transportation, your screams dying out from the shock. You almost crashed a couple of times, when in your terrified state, let a hand wander to his face, desperate to hold on and be put down at the same time. If not for his mask, you would have taken out an eye and Han Jisung’s career as a superhero, as well as your life, would have ended prematurely.

From that day forward, you believed in superheroes and every little absurdity that came out of Jisung’s mouth regarding their world and all the diverse powers people like him possessed. He didn’t speak about that side of his life too much, as to keep you safe, but the stuff he was willing to share was mind-blowing enough.

And that’s how you came to date Spiderman himself, a sheer contrast from the nerdy, shy guy you admired from afar in all of your classes. Still, you wouldn’t change it for the world.

Not even when instead of using the door, he randomly plopped on your windowsill whenever he missed you, throwing finger hearts and all the other variations he knew of to apologize for scaring you half to death like he was doing now. At least he had the decency to knock.

“Hello, love of my life.” He purred the moment he was let in, waltzing about like he owned the place, already familiar with your room. Collapsing onto your bed, he settles on his side, holding his masked head in one hand casually. “Still stuck on homework?”

“Oh, you mean the homework we were meant to work on together?” You stood a few feet away, arms crossed over your chest in indignation.

If he wasn’t still wearing his mask, you’d see his mouth drop open to form an ‘o’ shape, dramatic in his expressivity but not always genuine. “Baby, that was today? I’m so sorry! I swear I thought the assignment wasn’t due for another week.”

Your boyfriend was a top student, getting the highest grades on every test, exam and pop quiz he’s ever received. How the fuck did he manage to do all that with that goldfish-like memory of his?

“What’s got you so busy anyway?” You take a seat next to him on the bed, reaching to pinch the mask off his face before releasing it quickly, which he complains about loudly.

“Oh, you mean besides counting the laps you run through my mind constantly?” He wiggles his eyebrows beneath the mask, rubbing his left cheek to soothe the pain caused by the latex. Yes, the latex was definitely the one who hurt him, you could never.

You feel your face heat up to your ears, suddenly shy at his blatant flirtation. Noticing, he scoots closer as he moves into a sitting position, arms circling your waist to hug you from behind, chin resting on your shoulder like he’s done thousands of times before.

“Do you miss me?” His voice drops, atmosphere shifting as you lean into his hold a little too eagerly.

You couldn’t deny it – you have been missing him these days as he suddenly got insanely busy with those superhero duties of his.

“And what if I do?” In a bold show of confidence, you turn slightly in his arms to take off the annoying mask obscuring the breathtaking beauty that’s charmed you at first glance, all of those months ago.

Jisung smirks, so wide it turns into a grin that pulls harshly on your heartstrings, leaning to plant tender kisses on both cheeks while hugging you even tighter, almost like he wanted you to morph into one. Things would be so much easier then, he would be able to take you everywhere he went without going crazy with worry.

“We can’t have that, now, can we?” His kisses move to your shoulder, then down your arm, stopping to intertwine your hands before bringing them to his lips, to give your knuckles the same attention. “That would mean I’m a shitty boyfriend.”

You shake your head, eyes following his every move, mesmerized, as he kisses your skin with so much love and care, handling every inch like you were nothing more than a glass sculpture he was afraid he’d break if he as much as breathed too loudly. “That’s not – “

“Y/n, darling? Are you there?”

The booming voice of your father’s, followed by his approaching footsteps up the stairs has you pulling apart like burnt, panic settling in once you both realize the compromising position you’re currently in. Jisung was not the problem; your father loved him, said he was the best boy his child could ever pick to date. But his presence as a whole, how he even got in without anyone seeing him knock on the front door was sure to raise many questions you could not answer without revealing Jisung’s secret.

For once, your boyfriend doesn’t linger as your eyes meet, pulling the mask over his head in one swift movement before jumping to his feet.

“Jisung – “ He hushes you, gently pressing a finger to your lips in hopes you won’t panic too much, silently encouraging you to breathe and stop your frantic search for a place to hide. Your heart was threatening to beat out of your chest, scared he’d be found out and harshly ripped away from your side, reported to the police for invading random people’s homes. Your father was not the biggest Spiderman fan, claiming he was nothing but a smug troublemaker who enjoyed showing off a little too much. Now, finding said Spiderman in his child’s room would surely send him into a frenzy of rage you didn’t want to witness.

Once your breathing slows down, Jisung gives your hand a reassuring squeeze before letting go and webbing out of the room through the same window he came in, just as the door swings open.

“Darling?” Your father asks, stepping in to look around, a little confused. “Were you talking to someone?”

Quick to react, maybe even a little too quick, you point to your abandoned phone on the desk, shifting your weight from one foot to the other while clearing your throat. “Jisung and I were doing our homework.”

“Ah, I thought I heard him in here.” He nods, pleased with your answer, blind to the anxiety that had you break out in a cold sweat. “Sorry for interrupting. Do you want your favorite for dinner?”

When you agree with a smile, he leaves whistling, happy to be on his way and prepare dinner for his loved ones, saying he’ll call you downstairs in an hour or so.

Relief floods you once the door closes, knees almost giving out as all the tension leaves your body gradually. Just as your breathing returns to normal, you then hurry to the window, sticking your head out in search of your slippery boyfriend while checking every rooftop and high place in the vicinity.

You take a step back with a sigh when you can’t spot him, greatly disappointed. Has something happened in the short period it took to get rid of your father, pulling Jisung in the direction of another fight to ensure the safety of the city? Hopefully, that was not the case. But then, did that mean he got bored of waiting and left for good, too impatient to return to you?

Turning your back to the window, you ignore the chill that sneaks in and consider returning to your homework. Maybe Jisung will call later and explain, or you’ll just call him yourself after dinner. There had to be a reason for his absence, and you’ll try to appear unbothered if it turns out that reason was you.

“Boo.”

You whip around so fast that your eyes almost jump out of their sockets and escape out the window when Jisung appears before you, hanging by a thread from the ceiling, with a wide grin visible even through the thick mask.

“Hi, baby, what’s with the long face?”

You frown, still a little startled but approach nonetheless. “I thought you left me for good.”

He’s surprised, you can tell by the way his whole body tenses, and not from the effort of keeping himself upside down. “I am literally nothing without you, that would never happen for as long as I live.”

“And even after I pass, my ghost will keep you company until we can be together again in the afterlife.” He adds, sighing. “Do you not know me at all?”

The fact that he was so certain he would be the first one to depart from this world was chilling, to say the least. Still, the reassurance makes you feel a tiny bit better. Jisung will always return to you, no matter what, clinging to your connection for as long as he lived and even beyond, confident the red string of fate that tied you together won’t allow you to ever lose each other.

Jisung beckons you closer with a lone finger, holding on to his web with one hand, still insisting on remaining upside down for some unknown reason. When you’re close enough, his free arm wraps around your shoulders and drags you forward, almost closing the small gap between you.

“Sorry.” You murmur, a little embarrassed for jumping to conclusions just like that, forgetting the love your boyfriend carried for you everywhere he went, protecting it from evil while also counting on it to lead him down the right path, away from darkness and destruction. He tilts your head up, finger under your chin gently, and you’re left staring into big, stitched-on eyes.

“None of that, angel.” He shakes his head, managing to nudge your nose with his and spread the warmth in your chest throughout your whole body. “Kiss me and all is forgiven.”

You raise an eyebrow as it all clicks in your head. This was his plan from the beginning, hence why he never bothered to drop down and greet you properly. Typical Jisung, leave it to him to create random circumstances just to get a kiss instead of asking for one, like a normal person would. He loved being spoiled after all and he knew you loved complying, finding his menace tendencies too endearing to ever say no.

So without further ado, you do exactly what he expects and has been daydreaming about for days on end – nimble fingers reach for his mask and pull gently, afraid your touch alone might hurt him somehow when in reality, it’s the only one that does the opposite. You stop right before his nose, playfully squeezing and blocking his airways as your way of getting back at him, letting go and bringing your lips to his before he can even begin protesting.

You cup his cheeks, a little awkward, his arm still around your shoulders as you slowly kiss, drowning in each other and the waterfall of love that never and will never run out. Your tongues meet, and the kiss quickly becomes heated and wet, much more intense than either of you is used to. Maybe after all this time, the love started to overflow, making it impossible to control yourselves and your urges. Not like you minded, obviously delighted at this newfound passion as you can’t seem to get enough of each other.

Jisung is the first to pull away, and you can’t help but vocalize your protest when you notice a thin string of saliva still connecting your lips, almost like you’ve been glued together for so long that separating was out of the question, the sight making your head spin.

Yet, this brief moment allows him to drop down and scop you into his arms, your legs hugging him by the waist instantly as Jisung removes his mask and dives in again, kissing you like he needs it more than the air to breathe. His tongue is teasing yours again, lips feverish as you occasionally bite down just to hear the sweet sounds that escape him, all the groaning and huffing that indicate all of his restrain hangs by a thin spider web.  

“I could kiss you forever.” He breathes between quick pecks, eyes hazy as he stares at you beneath thick eyelashes. “Will you let me?”

He didn’t even need to ask. You’d let Han Jisung mold you into whatever he desired if that meant he’d stay happy for all eternity, for whatever was good for him, was also good for you.

But for now, forever will last until dinner is ready and your dad will barge into your room again, shooing the love bubble you and your boyfriend resided in away from prying eyes, out the open window.

And just because you can never be away from him for too long, Jisung will have to use the door and be invited inside as your boyfriend, and not as Spiderman.

tagging: @jisunggy <3

[2hightocare]

LOVE WAGER! 01

Synopsis: Meeting a crazy stranger who cuts in line, tries to tell you love like the books doesn’t exist—it’s whatever. You won’t ever see him again… right?

Pairings: jungkook x fem!reader

Genre: college au. strangers to friends to lovers. forced proximity.

Warnings: mentions of divorce parents, Jungkook lowkey being insufferable, banter, cussing, a little bit of them being enemies, nicknames, oc being a hopeless romantic at heart, Jungkook being lowkey a cynic… them meeting each other so many times, choking!

a/n: first chapter out!! Woohoo, I’ve been keeping them close to my heart for quite some time. Ever since I listened to “in between” by Gracie Abrams.. I was inspired to write them—the song is so them coded.💌

★ masterlist!

3 years ago…

You were a hopeless romantic.

Most people called it being delusional— by people, you mean the random stranger in front of you.

The first time you met Jungkook, not only did he cut in front of you in line, but he also started shit-talking about how delusional you had to be to think romance books were even remotely comparable to real life.

The line at the cupcake shop was long. You had been wanting to try the new chocolate-covered strawberry flavor from your favorite cupcake shop in the city. The shop was always full, but today it was packed to the bone— the line almost reached outside the door. The people sitting at the cute pastel-colored tables were even leaving because the space was getting so crowded.

It was a Friday, and you had just left school. Your black backpack hung loosely over one shoulder as you stared down at your phone, trying not to die playing Subway Surfers. When your phone died, you internally groaned.

You mentally rolled your eyes before looking forward, where the line was starting to move faster. You were probably the fourth person in line, which was good since you'd only been there for around twenty minutes. You slipped your phone into the back pocket of your jeans before reaching for the zipper of your backpack—pulling out the latest book you hadn’t finished reading amidst all the assignments teachers had been bombarding you with. You thought it was dumb, considering it was your senior year in high school—why not just let you off easy?

You zipped up your backpack before slipping it on, tucking in the small hair that fell into your face when you opened your book. You moved forward as the line advanced, not bothered by the conversations from everyone around you—it was like your own brown noise, which you usually looked up on YouTube whenever you wanted to act like the main character in a movie.

Romance books were your thing. The same went for movies; you loved a good romantic story with the most cliché plot in the world—it did it for you every single time.

Your dad had tried getting you into self-help books, fiction books, or even those thriller books where you had to guess who kills who. He would back this up with actually learning something from reading a book, and you tried all those genres, you really did. You were the most specific girl there could be; if the book didn't impress you within one chapter, you closed it and moved on.

You were basically in love with the idea of love, imagining someone doing all those things you had seen in movies and read about, which filled you with hope that someone could care and love you that way. Yes, you believed in soulmates; you believed that someone, somewhere in this world, was destined to be with you, no matter the circumstances. You believed that if two people were destined for each other, they would find a way to each other, one way or another.

“Hi, baby, you still haven’t ordered? The line is so fucking long.” A strange boy, who looked around your age or maybe slightly older due to his eyebrow piercing, spoke up. He had a navy blue cap with the Yankees logo on the front, and you could see small pieces of his hair. It looked like a dark brown, but at some angles, it looked black, so you thought maybe he dyed it. He was cute, with a sharp jaw and dimples, which you immediately noticed when they showed on his left cheek as he bit his lip, waiting for you to reply.

“I’m sorry—“ you started, only to be cut off by him. “I've been meaning to show you this, babe.” He cut you off before basically shoving his phone into your face. His phone showed his notes app open with a text that read, ‘Please act like you know me so I can cut in line; it’s so long, and I have somewhere to be.’

Your brows furrowed at the pleading guy. You had no clue what his name was, but he looked like he was seriously about to lose his mind if he had to wait another minute in line. You shook your head before nodding— a smile burst on his face.

“Thank you,” he mouthed to you, to which you only shrugged before closing your book. “What flavor are you getting, lovebug?” He said, his nose scrunching in disgust at what he just said. A small laugh escaped your lips since that was the cringiest shit you had heard all day, maybe even all week if you didn’t count your dad trying to write you a poem about his love for your cat.

“I want to get the new chocolate-covered strawberry flavor. What about you?” You said, your fingers fidgeting with the pages of your closed book. His eyes dropped to your hands as you moved up in line, now second in line.

“Is that your book?” He said instead of replying to your question. “Yeah, do you read?” A spike of excitement was clear in your face and voice, only to be squashed when he opened his mouth.

“Do you actually believe anything in there is remotely realistic?” He said nonchalantly before removing his cap, letting his fluffy hair fall in his face before almost immediately collecting it back, placing his cap backward this time.

“I—“ you stutter, your mouth slightly agape, not knowing how to reply without sounding dumb. Because, yeah, you strongly believed romance books were able to happen in real life if someone loved you enough. “Well.. I mean, love happens anywhere,” you shrug, but he only nods his head in a condescending way. Not only were you helping him skip in line—he was basically criticizing your view on love.

“Well, duh, love happens, but all that cringey shit is the dumbest thing our generation normalized. Like, nobody is going to confess their love with a microphone in the middle of a dance-off,” he scoffs. You didn’t understand why he actually looked like he seriously hated the idea of making gestures for someone you loved or cared about.

“Well, obviously, I find that stupid as well, but there are other gestures to show your appreciation and love for someone.” You turn your whole body to face him. He’s not much taller than you, maybe two inches if you really wanted to know, and the cap maybe added another inch, but that didn’t matter since your eyesight was eye level with his.

“Love is embarrassing,” he says, crossing his arms in front of him. You felt the lady behind you both, her eyes bore into you both, trying to figure out why the supposed couple were fighting about love.

“How is love embarrassing?” You scoff before turning around to look in front of you, at the back of the head of the man who was ordering.

“Because love makes you do embarrassing shit all the time; that’s the easiest way I can put it for you, ribbons,” he replies with a duh tone, raising his eyebrows at you, which you see from your peripheral vision.

“Ribbons?” You turn to him, your arms crossed over your book as you glare at him. “Pink ribbon. Don’t you think you look a little too old to be wearing bows?” A grin appears on his face as he casually points to the pink ribbon tied into a bow in your hair.

“The fuck? Not only did I let you skip the line, but you’re a) talking shit about my favorite genre, and b) making fun of me wearing bows.” You turn your full body to him, which he only raises his hands in defense, as if you had a gun pointed at him.

“Damn, my bad. I thought this was a free country; you know your amendments, right?” He raises an eyebrow at you. “Yes, I fucking know my amendments,” you reply, absolutely annoyed at him bringing history into this.

“Freedom of speech,” he says before walking in front of you to the cashier. You were annoyed, maybe even angry. How dare he talk shit and say freedom of speech when you just did him a favor.

“He cut in front of me,” you point to him as you tell on him to the cashier, his jaw dropping to the floor. “Did you just tell on me? What the fuck,” he side-eyes you as you just shrugged.

“I respectfully need to ask you to go to the back of the line,” the cashier says, shooting you an apologetic look. You bite on the inside of your cheek to contain the smile that is threatening to slip out, as he sends you a mocking face, which you return, because apparently, you both were literal children. He rolled his eyes before he walked off.

2 years ago..

The second time you met Jungkook, you almost died due to choking on your coke.

You and your best-friend, Amelia, sat in a booth, munching on pizza, while you hear her ramble about the latest drama on campus.

“I can’t believe he cheated on her. I was so shocked, like I couldn’t believe he would do that after he literally gave her a promise ring—I heard it was expensive as well, bro,” Amelia said, stuffing a French fry in her mouth.

Amelia and you had been best friends since your freshman year at Preston University. She ended up in your dorm room by mistake, until security escorted her to her corresponding room. You both even had your calculus class together, which ended in both of you ripping your hair out because you truly had no clue what the professor was talking about.

“Oh my god, you’re lying!” you gasped, taking a bite of your folded pizza. “Alexandra said she didn’t care, but apparently, she was crying at the frat party we were supposed to go to yesterday,” Amelia said, pressing her lips together with wide eyes. As you were about to reply, she gasped.

“Holy shit, babes, don’t turn around, but there’s this fine-ass guy behind you,” she said. Without thinking you turned your whole body to look at the guy she was talking about.

“Or just turn your whole body, I don't care,” she added, rolling her eyes.

“Wait, who?” you asked, staring at the group of boys in front of you. They were all cute, just not your type whatsoever. “He just turned around, so you can’t see his face, but the one with the black beanie,” Amelia whispered to you as she took a sip of her Dr Pepper.

As you stared at the back of the boy who was engrossed in a conversation with his friend, a loud laugh escaped his lips before he threw his head back, letting you catch a glimpse of his face.

“Oh, fuck, his laugh is hot as fuck as well,” Amelia said behind you, chewing on her crispy fries. “Do you think he has a girlfrien—“ The words melted from your mouth as the beanie boy turned around. “Yeah, he definitely has a girlfriend,” Amelia said nonchalantly, clearly not catching how your eyes widened, as you both stare at the boy who had cut in front of you in line three years ago.

He was taller, much taller, and he was built—you could tell even from his oversized long-sleeve shirt. As much as you wanted to disagree, he was undeniably attractive. The eyebrow piercing was still there, but it somehow looked better than when you first saw it.

“Ribbons?” he said, pointing at you with a chuckle, making you flinch for absolutely no reason. Amelia looked between both of you, trying to read the room.

“Mr. anti-romantic?” You fired back, a huge smile breaking out on his face before he excused himself from his friend group and made his way to your booth. “I see you got a nickname for me... I feel honored,” he said, pressing a palm to his heart dramatically before shooting a nod at Amelia, who waved with a small smile on her face.

You just rolled your eyes. He was the most childish person you had ever met, and that says a lot since this was only the second time you'd ever spoken to him. “I wouldn’t be so honored,” you mumbled, shooting him a tight-lipped smile as he shook his head with a low chuckle.

“Do you have a girlfriend?” Amelia said out of nowhere, both you and the unknown boy's heads snap to the side as a smirk makes it’s way to his mouth, while you throw daggers at Amelia with your eyes for her blunt question. “I doubt he would ever hav—“ you start, only to be rudely interrupted by none other than Mr. anti-romantic himself.

“I actually do, and I was just about to meet her here, but I saw your friend and just had to come and say hello,” he said to your best friend, all while wearing a condescending smile.

“Oof, I feel bad for her,” you shrugged, before placing the straw of your clear cup in your mouth and sipping on your coke.

“Eh, she says I’m a pretty good boyfriend, not a hopeless romantic like someone I know,” he said, watching your eyes meet his before you tilted your head in a mocking way, which he picked up immediately.

“I wonder how you even got her to say yes to you,” you bit back, your eyes maintaining contact with his, not wanting to be the first to break it. But he was too good at it; you almost felt like crumbling into a ball from how intense his stare was.

“I guess you could say there are more ways to please a woman without love letters,” he said nonchalantly. You choked on your coke as the liquid went down the wrong pipe, making you start having a coughing attack.

His and Amelia’s eyes widened as Amelia immediately swatted the man who was right beside you. His hand made contact with your arm, raising it up in the air.

“The fuck are you doing?” Amelia said aggressively, side-eyeing him, as you basically died in front of their wondering eyes. You really didn’t expect him to just talk about his sexual life so openly without a care. You would want to crawl into a hole if your boyfriend ever talked about your private moments like that to anyone.

“My mom said if you put someone’s hand up, it makes your cough go away. I don’t fucking know! I’m not a doctor,” he shot back at your best friend as he raised your arm in the air. Your cough slightly disappeared as you tapped on your chest as if that would do anything to stop it.

“Are you good?” Amelia said as she basically hovered over the table. You felt the whole dinner's eyes on you as you tried to recover from the insane coughing fit you just had. “Y-yeah, fuck,” you coughed, your arms still up in the air from his hold. “I almost for real thought you were about to die. I already imagined myself behind bars,” he said, rubbing his unoccupied hand through his face with a sigh.

“Now I’m hoping I actually died,” you said, yanking your arm away from his grasp.

“We’re leaving, Amelia. Let’s go,” you said, standing up, collecting your jacket and bag, and pushing him out of the way, standing up beside him.

He hovered over you; you almost wanted to jump up to reach his height, but you were already embarrassed enough. So instead, you fixed your denim skirt before looking up at him.

“Well, it was so not nice to see you again, and hopefully we don’t get to meet again, Mr. anti-romantic. Goodbye,” you said as you sent him a fake smile his way.

You pulled on Amelia’s hand before she could say anything and walked out of the dining room without looking back at the boy who was standing in the same place, watching the girl he almost witnessed pass away by choking on coke from him even remotely bringing up sex.

A small chuckle left past his lips as he made his way to the table where his friends were seated.

“Dude, what the fuck happened? Why was that pretty girl coughing like crazy?” Taehyung said, eyeing the door through which you had just left.

Jungkook didn’t know why his heart picked up when his best friend called you pretty. He wasn’t blind; you were beautiful. When he first met you, you both were obviously much younger. If it wasn’t for how much you had grown into your face and the braces you once had were long gone, it would’ve been your aura that gave it away. You were more outspoken, which kinda took him back but sent a sense of excitement through his body.

“No clue. Just some girl I met in my senior year... kinda taken aback I ran into her again,” Jungkook said before picking up the menu from the table, looking for what food he should order. “Maybe it’s fate, bro,” Namjoon teased, which made Jungkook drop his menu on the table.

“You guys know all that shit is bullshit, right? It was just a coincidence. I’ll probably never see her again after this,” Jungkook rolled his eyes, leaning backward onto the booth and crossing his arms in front of him defensively.

“Whatever you say, champion,” Hoseok whistled as he called the waitress.

Jungkook's brain immediately canceled out the noise as he started running through all the possible scenarios that would leave you both at the same place at the same time. His body shook from the possibility of it being fate; he hated the idea of the answer being anything besides actual proven fact. He didn’t care how cynical he might sound; he had trusted so many people in his life, including his parents, who always preached about love and honesty. But flash forward to him having to skip around each house of his parents every weekday and weekend. He hated how he believed them when they said love can get through everything. Absolutely not—divorce.

He just imagined your perfect household, two parents at the same home who still say ‘I love you’ to each other every chance they get. You get to read your books in your living room without a fight breaking out out of nowhere just because someone forgot to throw the trash out.

Love didn’t exist in his eyes. He believed in mutual respect. He doesn’t believe in the whole crazy in love charade. His girlfriend Haneul didn’t really want the whole whispering cute things in each other's ears or dancing under the moon either, and that’s why he chose her.

Plus, he wasn’t an asshole when it came to love when it came to other people. Did he want to ruin their moment and tell them they wouldn’t last? Yes—but he never does.

He saw how broken his mom was after the divorce. He thought about the idea of love and if someone came to love you, you would do anything in your power to not hurt them. It had been five years since his parents’ divorce, and everyone seemed to have moved on perfectly, while Jungkook watched how his perspective of love changed drastically over time.

He was glad that you didn’t have to go through what he had to go through, given your obvious naivety. That was entirely the only reason he shit-talked about love when he first met you, which was the most jackass move he could’ve done, especially after you let him skip the line. But after you told on him to the cashier like a little child, he was thinking of actually tackling you.

Either way, it didn’t matter for him to be worrying or thinking about you in the first place, when he didn’t even know your name. Plus, he would never see you again, that’s for sure.

Present day..

Psychology class was your number one nemesis. You literally begged the counselor to let you have another class that wasn’t psychology. Not only did he laugh, but he said it would do you good. In your mind, he basically called you crazy—maybe you did need the class after all.

As you huffed and puffed to your last class of the day, you fixed your glasses on your face and tightened the high ponytail with the white ribbon that matched the outfit Amelia helped you pick out. You pushed open the door to the class and were greeted by half-empty seats and no professor, giving you the option to choose where you sat.

You were a middle-seat row girl, unable to see far away without your glasses. You also avoided sitting too close to the front, fearing teachers would call on you.

As you took a seat in the chair, a body sat beside you without a word. You didn’t even care to look as you took out your laptop from your backpack, worrying about how this year’s professor might be. You had heard from last year’s students that the teacher might have been the devil’s spawn.

While you were finally seated, you moved your head to your left to see the body next to you engrossed in their phone. Your jaw dropped as you were met with none other than Mr. Anti-Romantic.

“What the actual fuck, are you stalking me or something?” you said, absolutely baffled by how many times you had run into him and from all the empty seats, he decided to sit next to you.

He immediately raised his head from his phone, his eyes widening as he stared at your obviously angry face. “Ribbons? What the actual fuck, I didn’t realize that was you,” he said, throwing his head back in shock.

“You had to know it was me, why else would you sit beside me?” you scoffed, crossing your arms in front of you. He looked the same as the last time you saw him, except now he had a full sleeve of tattoos on his right arm, and the eyebrow piercing was long gone.

Now that he was closer to you, you could see the small mole he had under his lip and the scar on his cheek. His hair was shorter and black, but classroom lights deceived, so maybe it was fully brown, but you didn’t dare to ask.

“Don’t think you’re special, Ribbons. I just can’t see from the back, and in the front, teachers always pick on you to talk in front of the class, and I’m trying to avoid that,” he explained, having the same process as you, but unfortunately, the other half of his brain didn’t process the idea of love.

“Are you sure you have the right class?” you bit out, hoping he had walked into the wrong class and would have to leave immediately. You seriously couldn’t even wrap your head around the fact that he was here and that he went to the same university as you—this being the first time he had seen you around campus.

“Psychology class A65,” he side-eyed you as you rolled your eyes and faced the board, trying your best to ignore his presence.

“You know you can just move to another seat, right?” he said, pointing to all the empty seats beside you. Your head slowly turned to the side to face his face as he gave you a tight-lipped smile.

“Why would I move when I was here first?” you scoffed his way as he shrugged, indicating that he couldn’t care less. “’Cause I truly don’t care, but you obviously seem affected by my presence, so Ribbons, pick your seat,” he pointed to the available seats.

You imagined the easiest way you could kill someone, but tackling him to the ground at this exact moment might bring attention to you both, so you just breathed out of your nose before giving him a fake smile and rolling your eyes.

“I’m not leaving, and for your information, I’m perfectly fine and not bothered by your presence whatsoever,” you said, trying your best to seem as calm and collected as possible.

“For your information…” he mocked beside you, trying to imitate your voice before chuckling. “I swear, Ribbons, I can see smoke coming out of your ears and nose,” he laughed.

“Stop calling me Ribbons,” you gritted your teeth, already at your limit.

“What else do you want me to call you? I don’t know your name, and you’re still wearing ribbons, I can see,” Mr. Anti-Romantic pointed to the white ribbon in your hair. You rolled your eyes before sending his calm, collected figure a scanty smile.

“Y/n,” you said, tilting your head to the side, as if asking him to tell you his name. “I like Mr. Anti-Romantic, not gonna lie,” he bit his lip, trying to contain his laughter as you were about to lose your composure at any moment.

“You aggravate me, and I don’t know why,” you mumbled, hoping he didn’t hear—but he did, loud and clear. “Jeon Jungkook,” he said, and before you could reply, the professor strode in, wearing the weirdest clothes you could imagine.

“She looks like that one crazy Victorious teacher,” he whispered softly, only for you to hear, smugly bending downward so you could hear better. A small laugh left your lips. “Sikowitz?” you whispered back as both of you stared forward at the professor, who was talking about the syllabus. “Yeah, spot the difference: hard level,” he whispered.

You looked down at your hands, trying to hide the amusement on your face.

For the rest of the class, you guys didn’t talk whatsoever, and honestly, you wouldn’t know if he tried, since you were absorbed in whatever Mrs. Calderon was saying.

“So, here’s where you start hating me, I’m giving you guys a project,” she said, leaning on her desk, making the desk creak. You could hear small groans from students around you, but not loud enough for her to hear.

“It will be a partner project, which I chose randomly, and no, I’m not changing them. I want you guys to be able to work with whomever, no matter what,” she said, a sense of dread passing through you.

“I would email each and every one of you what the project is about. It is due at the end of the quarter, so I better not hear, ‘I didn’t have time, Miss,’” Mrs. Calderon said before picking up a sheet of paper.

"Here are the partners, so after class, come and check who your partner is so you can start talking about what you both will do." With that the bell ringing, everyone stood up and rushed to the paper, including yourself. You held tightly onto your backpack strap as you waited for people to move out of the way—half of the people bitched about who they got, they couldn’t possibly be that bad.

Your heart dropped to your ass as you read your name—Jungkook squished beside you, looking for his name, only to find it where your finger was already on.

You got paired up with Jungkook. What kind of fuckery was this?

As Jungkook read "Y/n Y/ln & Jeon Jungkook," he couldn’t believe his eyes. He almost lost his mind when he realized it was you when he sat next to you, but he tried his best to act unaffected. However, this was too much of a "fuck you" sign from the universe—Jungkook didn’t think he did something so horribly to be rewarded like this.

What the fuck were the odds, and how could he scientifically prove that it’s not the universe trying to mess with him?

Taglist💌— @httpjeonlicious @thekookiedealer @somehowukook @taiwan0618 @gwsjungkookie @seokout @sealuv79 @junecat18 @joonsanswer @letjungcoook7 @skzthinker @ahgasegotarmy116recs @ivygguk (I couldn’t add some idk why😓)

[waltzingwithyourenemyattheball]

PICK A CARD: LOVE NOTES FROM YOUR FUTURE SPOUSE

Top Left: Pile 1 Top Right: Pile 2 Bottom: Pile 3

Disclaimer: This is a general reading, so take what resonates and leave the rest.

You are not allowed to copy my work under any circumstances.

All personal tarot readings are PAID.

Thank you for all letting me read for you, please provide feedback.

Pile 1

‘We would be a wonderful us’  ‘Workplace romance’ ‘I’ll follow you till the end’ ‘I’m always gonna be in love with you’

You might get text like this: 1. Them: You are beautiful, more than you realise. 2. Them: I’ll make you breakfast. 

Your future spouse and you share a similar sense of humour, you both will be teasing and joking a lot. I see they are into philosophy for some of you, definitely a deep thinker either way, their view of life might intrigue you. This person an you will have many conversations, they will be mentally stimulating to you and get you thinking. Definitely some air sign presence (Gemini, Libra, Aquarius). I see rain is significant, maybe you’ll meet that time but it is coming in strong. Either one of you loves to style hair. I am seeing a man braiding a girl’s hair. It’s the little things about your relationship, spending quality time whenever you can, through thick and thin. They only like you and want you to be verbal in expressing your feelings. They really want to get married to you have an unbreakable bond. 

COMMENT 111 TO CLAIM!

🌙To know more about your future spouse in detail, DM me for a personal tarot reading🌙

Pile 2

‘Hopeless romantic with high standards’  ‘Star-crossed lovers’  ‘You look at each other like the two of you have your own language’ ‘One in simping, the other is oblivious’ - literally everyone else sees it. ‘Are we friends? Or are we more?’

They might say these things to you:

1. I am not supposed to be thinking about you.  3. Why won’t you leave my mind?  4. Wherever I look you are there. 5. Them: fight me for the rest of our lives.

Their heart flutters when you are in close proximity to them. Romantic tension and some awkward moments, with stealing glances and shy smiles. You guys will also have a lot of healthy debates where you disagree and argue, but overtime know how to work things through and are respectful. The transition period from friends to lovers is really being given emphasis here, it’s like everyone else sees it, when you two are together, you forget other people exist. Some of you might even know each other since college or some educational institution. Your love is very pure, only wanting the best for them. It is a slow-burn romance, with hands almost touching but didn’t. You guys are each others safe space, giving a sense of security. 

🌙To know more about your future spouse in detail, DM me for a personal tarot reading🌙

PILE 3

There are many different messages for this group, take it as it resonates. ‘Enemies to lovers’ ‘Friends to lovers’ ‘Workplace romance’ ‘SO THIS IS LOVE’  ‘Cute nicknames’ - even if you find them cringey right now, with the right person I see you turning into a puddle. ‘I feel lovable when you take care of me’ ‘Talk like best friends’ ‘Power couple’  ‘Someday when I say I am going home, it’ll mean I get to see you and that will make all of everything worth it’ Things they might say to you/text you: 1. You are so cute. 2. Do you wanna go driving? Just me and you. 3. We fix it together, because that’s what a relationship is about, going through life together as a team 4. You are so physically and mentally attractive at the same time, that’s why I am so crazy about you. 5. I only pretend I don’t like you. 6. [ angry whisper ] do you even know how cute you are.  One thing is settled, that they definitely find you attractive. It might start out as dislike which will morph into a friendship of sorts leading to a love connection. You guys love to banter. I see a lot of banter. If you read ‘the hating game’ I get those vibes. They find excuses to spend time with you until they are like I am gonna be honest and be more upfront rather than relying on some external factor. One of you is unconventional and the other finds them interesting and the constant need to be in touch, might also be a therapist of some sort, or just have healing energy. 🌙To know more about your future spouse in detail, DM me for a personal tarot reading🌙

-

EL TAROT

[joenotexotic99]

Idk if you're still making this, but I want to let you know that we're waiting for BoB Lovetropes p2. My suggestions: Toye, Eugene, Malarkey, Guarnere, Luz, Sobel. Hope you're doing okay <3

A/n: I've been dealing with some stuff lately and now finally have a little time to catch up on old stuff. I also want to apologize anon I couldn't bring myself to soble. Sorry couldn't do it.

-Warnings: fluff, tiny bit of language, got wayyy to carried away with malarkey’s, oops. Might have to turn that into its own thing, if it's not already. Luz is slightly spicy, nothing crazy but you cant miss it.-

Masterlist

Joe Toye

-grumpy vs sunshine trope. Omggggg, the idea of this has me kicking my feet and giggling. Joe Toye is rough around the edges, tough skin. You on the other hand have always been the positive one, keeping the people around you spirits high. Being an optimist of sorts. Maybe not cheerful but you could definitely make someone's day. Yet behind his grumpy facade, he can't help but notice your unwavering optimism. He wasn't opposed to love; he just never expected to be swept off his feet so quickly by one person. Your personality was anything but the same. Never in a million years did he think he was going to fall in love with a bright and shiny person, which was the exact reason why he loved you so much. You two were like night and day. You were the beacon of light in all the darkness. I feel like Toye would also be super protective over you. Kinda the same vibe as liebgott. But that's for another time. 

“Is that a smile I see on your face toye?” “I'm one lucky bastard you realize that?”

Eugene roe

-office romance/forced proximity. I didn't exactly know what to call this one. Both you and roe are easy company medics. Gene from the start, harbord a crush on you. And mean big time crush. Thinking about you he got butterflies in his stomach. You both spent significant time together. Typically the only times you were separated is when you were attending to fellow paratroopers. Bastogne was a turning point. You were in a jeep headed to the church, your hand and a cloth being the soul thing keeping a man alive. You almost made it before the church burst into flames. When Gene heard what happened he got the first ride possible to bastogne. When he saw you, hand now on a clearly dead man, he took you into his arms. He brought you back to the Adrennes forest. As usual you spent the night in genes fox hole the only difference was you both saw what was right in front of you for the first time and kissed. It wasn't until Austria where he gave you a promise ring where he promised to spend and devote the rest of his life with you.

“you make me the happiest man you know that y/n?”

“Tell me that again at our wedding”

Donald Malarkey 

-friends to lovers? Maybe a sprinkle of enemies to lovers?? I don't know but here me out. So you join the paratroopers as a female, the reason you got in was from connections in the army. Seeing how even if you are the most talented female there is, it's still the 40s here. I wouldn't think that the Toccoa men would flat out bully you, but would more just not believe in you. Probably leave you out of a lot of things. Kind of just pretend you weren't there. But not malarkey. He saw something in you that the rest didn't. Honestly he was shocked to see how they treated you. You were the best paratrooper there was in this company. You stood your ground. You met and exceeded in all categories. Passed each test with flying colors. You also were able to do it with the most incredible smile. As much as you disliked it, he stood up for you. Complimented and congratulated you when you did well. You really liked him. He was cute, kind, and not a douche wad. But sadly, most guys here if they weren't mean, they were trying to get Into your pants. As much as you wouldn't mind that with malarkey, you weren't here for that. One day in Aldbourne England you had enough. You weren't going to get swooned into bed and he had to know it. When you had a spare moment you grabbed him and pulled him aside and told him to stop. He was bewildered that this is how you perceived him. He explained to you that was not his intention. You could hear the sincerity of his voice. He meant it. This was the start of your friendship. You both were like a thing but not? Kinda a situationship. But it wasn't official until Haguenau. The effects of war painted across your faces. In one of the houses you laid in one of the beds, trying for the hundredth time to get some rest to no avail. He came and found you. There was little and a lot to say. Instead he kissed you. The past two years of friendship melted instantly into a lifetime of love. 

“god i've wanted you to do that for a long time”

“What happened to ‘I'm not here for a relationship’?”

“shut the fuck up and kiss me again would ya”

William Guarnere

-Enemies to lovers. Come on, this is so perfect. Guarnere is a natural bully. He bullies everybody all the time, but you? He loves bullying you. He always has an insult special for you up his sleeve. However, that's a lie. He hates it to his core. You are the sweetest person ever. All he wants to do is not bully you. He's somewhere in the middle of liebgott and Speers. He doesn't want to be seen as weak. He has this demnor he feels the need to uphold and that everybody around him expects. Not some ooey gooey man. Even though if he could he'd probably worship you. You were perfect in his eyes. He hates himself more and more but the more he digs himself into this hole the harder it is for him to get out. He finally cracks when someone else makes a particular mean stab at you one day at a bar in holland. He can hate himself all he fucking wants for bullying you. But somebody else is doing it? Hurting you? Not going to happen. He breaks his nose, jaw, maybe a rib or two, black eye and busted lip, all before he could get ripped off this guy. You get wind of this later. Within minutes you're confronting him. Before he shuts you up with a kiss.

“I thought you hated me”

“Hate you? No, For fuckes sake sweetheart, I'm in love with you”

George Luz

-meet cute. You originally met just before you signed up to be paratroopers. And I mean just before. You were getting blood work done to test how fit you were to fight.  As you waited in the lobby to fill out paperwork, you went to reach for your pen. That's when you realized it wasn't there. It just so happens that a very cute guy next to you had an extra with him. You quickly filled the paper and exchanged names and conversations. On the way home you couldn't get him out of your head. So couldn't he. Later when you were assigned to easy company you found the one and only George luz. The same extremely handsome guy at the clinic. He immediately recognized you. How could he not? Your face and laugh had been at the front of his thoughts a lot lately. You tried to keep both of your composure during Toccoa seeing how you didn't want to get into any trouble. But that all fell apart after one weekend with a pass and some alcohol. Kisses were shared, clothes were shed and hands roamed. After that night you made it official. Luz also started writing his vows.

“you know I've never felt this way before”

“What the sex or me? Because If it wasn't the sex let me know so we can go again”

“both luz, but I can't turn that offer down now can I”

[amberinn]

Guys I have another crazy theory

If Charles dies during chapter 3----

which is something that CAN happen,

(Whit and Charles.....

The chances of them both dying in one chapter are small

The chances of both of dying are good enough

The chances of one of them dying and one surviving are good enough

Personally I've death flagged Whit

I get this feel that Charles has a 50/50 on being a victim, and a survivor.

Whit is chapter 3, 4, and 5 death flag coded to me

additionally he's traitor (red flag) and mastermind (red flag) coded also!

god why am I so certain he will die if I can't imagine his body in front of my eyes?

J has a chapter 4 feel

Arturo chapter 3 feel

Veronika chapter 3 feel

Ace chapter 3 feel

David chapter 5 feel

Teruko survivor feel

Eden survivor feel, chapter 3 feel, chapter 5 feel?

perhaps 6

(Arei had a chapter 2 victim feel, though throughout the chapter I've switched between thinking like 10 people had death flags.

I know nothing)

I can't take a feel on Rose at all

perhaps she's a survivor

I don't have a feel of Nico at all.

they've literally doomed themself though.

might be a survivor.

Levi has always had a chapter 5 death feel to me

Hu Jing chapter 2 (3, 4? early early early... it was SUPPOSED to be early, I think I'll stand with chapter 2.

chapter 3 has too many other feels on it.

chapter 4 has too many other feels on it.

(maybe chapter 4)

fuck goddamnit she's supposed to be dead, to my own understanding, but everyone else fits better)

Whit could like

Like the person Whit could strive to talk to could be David Chiem?

I sound insane to my own ears.

(Nobody sane would want to talk to that man)

Think about it, Charwhit happened like this

Charles is a dickcunt to everyone around him with a stick up his dick

Whit is a chillout guy with a knack for joking around, and getting annoyed with people who think they're horseshit

Charles loves his personal space

Whit ALSO loves Charles personal space and latches himself onto him, to make jokes and make fun of how he seriously thinks he is so superior and all.

Charles is so unbelievable.

He's like.

A guy!

A specific kind of guy.

Whit practically attached himself to Charles hip to have fun, and humble him (is the feel I get)

They both slowly learn about each other via forced proximity

The THING, that turns them both from (man, fuck that guy) to (that is... my closest friend)

is that they're both decent people.

Whit helps out someone who is suffering, gives him alibi, speaks out for him during a high stress situation, makes sure he's decent

Charles APPRECIATES THAT, going as far as to agree to Whit saying they are friends

I don't remember if he did that, but I think he softened his attitude towards him too?

He also CHANGED. for the better.

he understood the importance of relying on someone.

something HAPPENS to them, and the way they deal with that is by helping each other (when no one else would)

Like they're besties rn, literal soulmates (platonic or otherwise)

As a charwhit shipper?

They're my kissing rats, in my headspace I take little figurines of them and have them kiss

I imagine something like lazy mornings, where Whit makes himself some gross type of coffee to wake up and they're in the kitchen and Charles kind of just grabs him like a lover would and spins him around and they're happy

And I imagine Charles laying on the bed with Whit and sort of cuddling one of his thighs to be affectionate while Whit like.

Relaxes? I unno, something something.

Just chillout afternoons

I imagine Charles spooning Whit with his head on top of Whit's hands wrapped around the waist while Whit leans back on him in bed

Watching some kind of movie on a laptop.

Not a horror one!

They would have a feel of a horror one if they weren't.

Them!

Charles is not suitable for blood and gore and bodies and etc

Whit is a comedy type of guy (romcom esp)

I've no headcanons what kinda movie it would be, but yeah yeah yeah

I imagine a side hug on a bench in a nice park

God I'm like

Not a Whitvid shipper or a Charuko shipper, but the latter one

latter.. ladder? someone translate the word latter into actual english word.... what do I put to make the sound in my head make sense linguistically?

is canon to me also 🙏

happy day to all those that celebrate, let's have a welcome powercouple solves a trial time while David has an emotional constipation! ~ ✨

Truly the fangan of all time!

Whitvid is not canon to me yet sorry, they just don't have a lovers type of feel (yet, perhaps we still have 4 more chapters to go let's see if they're making out by then /j

I'm sorry I'm sorry

cacklingggggg

but like as I was saying

I don't quite believe my thoughts YET, but

Well David is

He has a Charles feel to me

I've already classified him and Charles in the same group!!

The group name is called "people with superiority complex who are behind on life"

David cannot for the life of him think for himself in a way that MAKES SENSE, he yaps and yaps and yaps and yaps and is like

Xander Xander Xander Xander, he stabbed you

you should have known he'd stab you

"Xander stabbed me, he is a bad person.

what kind of divine REASON could he possibly have for hurting me? for wanting to kill me?"

"oh my god shut up 😭" <- David Chiem impression

(nobody would have ever hurt you baby if you didn't bring him up in the first place)

(I know you want to say everything you've never gotten the CHANCE to, but this man is NOT PREPARED for people speaking back!)

like Charles can't cook, or do basic self care shit

David can't get a hold on himself nearby people who irritate him/say things that are TRUE that hurt him deep inside

Neither of them know a couple of things about ~the life basics~

can't keep his mouth shut (girl it's running)

acts like he thinks he's superior enough to just shut everyone who ever wrongs him down

Their lifestyle ensured that

Also David literally speaks down to people like, all the time

Like once again.

again and again and again.

nobody would ever want to search him out.

I'm insane for even theorizing if not suggesting this.

This man....

Needs to be humbled <3

And who better to teach him a lesson than Hu

the guy he hates for existing Let's be real Hu could try, but she would never be able to get through to David

Theorizing potential future dynamic between David and Whit I do not believe in Charwhit seperating early on, or Whit surviving chapter 3 <- princess rat emoji

guys guys guys....

👉👈

I didn't... like I wasn't crude enough right?

I love ranting and I love like... saying stuff

I didn't come off strong in a bad way right?

you like to read What I'm saying?

what I'm thinking?

I didn't hurt anyone here?

If I did anything to hurt anyone I'm sorry

It GENUINELY escaped my mind

I don't know if I've said anything really bad :(

I don't detect myself having said anything bad, but a heavy rant on a drdt related topic has me having flashbacks

sorry sorry!

it's just I'm the type of person to say my opinion on my own character analysis

I hope I didn't do anything wrong to anyone ... :(

Sigh, okay! okay.

Are we good? Drdt fandom, we alright?

Doing great, no hard feelings?

Okay! Okay!

I can do this

[chevelleneech]

Both Buck/Tommy and Buddie shippers are being so dramatic about everything.

On one hand, you have people acting like Buck and Tommy is written in the stars and anyone who dislikes them are being unjust and hateful. On the other, you have people acting as if Buck can’t possibly be in a relationship with a man who isn’t Eddie, and claiming he can is somehow based in racism and hatred of Eddie.

Neither is true! The problem is that prior to 7x04, Evan Buckley was not a canon queer character. He was viewed that way by fans and Oliver Stark was all for it, but that does not change the actual canon history of the character. Therefore, the writers can only fix what they feel fits the current story. They can retcon a few things and so on, but both sides are acting like they’re right, and it makes no sense.

Yes, Buddie shippers have Oliver and Ryan on their side for the most part. Yes, Oliver believes Buck has been queer all along and he thinks a lot of the headcanons about his character’s reaction to things make sense, but he is NOT saying it’s all true. He agrees Buck was likely experiencing some jealousy when Eddie first showed up, but that does not mean Tim Minear is going to make that theory canon. It’s fans and Oliver who think it, but that does not equal canon.

As well, with things being slightly retconned or adjusted to fit the story… Tommy is obviously no longer an asshole by proximity. He was rude to Hen and Chim, but we’ve seen he him interact with the two of them since in civil ways. We know Chim thinks he’s cool. Continuing to demand he apologize on screen is a waste of time. It was five seasons ago, and the story had to change to fit Tim bringing his character back. It happens.

As for Buck/Tommy shippers, y’all have got to get off the high horse of Possibility. At the moment, there are so many ways their relationship can go, and the only reason you all are so high and mighty about it, is because you’re technically never going to be wrong until you’re wrong. Which is annoying.

Yes, Tim could choose to have Tommy stick around for another season. Yeah, Buck and Tommy could be endgame. Yeah, Buck and Tommy could… any and everything is possible, but acting as if Tommy is the love of Buck’s life and deserves fan devotion is crazy. Don’t get me wrong, I like the character. He seems nice if a little cocky, but I like that. I like that he’s written as a grown man who, even though he’s changed, still has a little bit of asshole in him.

Because yes, what he did to Buck on their first date was rude. He didn’t explain anything and left him standing outside the restaurant as if he hadn’t just told him he’s never dated a man before, and as if they hadn’t just run into his best friend. It was a dick move. However, it’s also kinda realistic. So I dug it, but that’s also all we really know about him.

Tommy is an army vet, flies helicopters, was a firefighter, and is gay. Which he struggled to come to terms with, and can be a dick. The way y’all treating him like a savior is insane. Y’all are trying to rub it in people’s face that his relationship with Buck is canon while Buddie isn’t, and I don’t understand that. Buck wasn’t even bisexual three episodes ago, so where is this higher than thou attitude even coming from?

The only thing people should be focused on is the fact that Buck is now canonically bisexual. Tim liked the idea and Oliver loved it, so they finally made it happen. Now, his story has even more potential. I’d even go so far as to say season 7 is going to be a cleaning and re-establishing of all the characters, because so many of them feel a little different.

We’ve got bi!Buck, meaning we’ll get to see him in one or more relationships that he isn’t used to being in. We’ve got a new actor playing Harry, and he’s older, meaning they’re going to have to write to his strengths and build a storyline there that is more mature. Bobby and Athena almost died together for real for real, thus hopefully we’ll get to see their relationship evolve and what if it changes them in any way. Chim and Maddie are finally getting married, so we get to see them kickstart a new chapter together. Hen and Karen have a new child, which will hopefully bring them more storylines and hijinks as a family. And Eddie is dealing with forcing himself to accept a relationship he may not even want to be in. And he’s aware this time, which could result in him ignoring his fears or bowing out, then having to face what bowing out means.

Point is, there is no reason for all this drama.

Buddie is not guaranteed just because it is a popular want for fans, and an accepted theory by the actors and showrunner. They’ve all said it has to fit the overall story without forcibly gearing the writing in that direction. Which means it could happen two episodes from now or two seasons from now. We just have to wait and see.

At the same time, Buck and Tommy are not an established couple yet. They’re going on their second date, and it’s been said Tommy isn’t in the last few episodes of the season. So it’s possible he and Buck are still together, but Lou isn’t a series regular nor regular recurring, so he’s just not contracted to be on set. Which is fine, but acting like a quick breakup is also bad storytelling is ridiculous.

Fans have hated Buck’s relationships with women from the jump, and him breaking up fast isn’t exactly new. So if it happens with the first man he dates… okay. Tommy can become more than a stepping stone, but the writers aren’t obligated to make his first experience with a man something deep and profound. It can be fun and eye-opening and still have mattered, even if it ends fast.

Y’all have got to let the stories play out, and not scream bloody murder if your headcanon doesn’t become canon. Because truth be told, Buck being canon bi is the biggest flex of fan service I’ve ever seen, even if I think it adds to the depth of him. So I can’t imagine how difficult it is to be sure not to continue giving that same group of fans everything they want outright, when there’s so much more story to unfold.

Which means they can’t just make Tommy the love of Buck’s life because Buck/Tommy fans have ditched Buddie or were never Buddie shippers, and want to be right. But they also can’t have Eddie come out and he and Buck start dating, because Buddie shippers have waited five seasons. Just wait to see what happens, and in the meantime, enjoy watching Buck discover more of himself. With Tommy as his current love interest, and Eddie as his best friend.

[moonshynecybin]

PEDRENZO TOXIC RIVALRY YEARS FORCED PROXIMITY CURSE. TELL ME MORE

YAYYYY okay so. for dani and jorge it HAS to be after one of the most intense races of their lives. don’t ask me which I DO NOT KNOW ! i’ll leave it up to you to decide if one fits specifically but it was CRUCIALLY a knockdown drag out fucking fight. high effort. satisfying. one millionnnnn overtakes. and eventually they BOTH podium, and the race was so bananas —kinetic and tense and somewhere HOT— that they feel like the blood in their veins is legitimately made of GASOLINE— and they HATE each other at this point, but on days like this the space between them is also filled with this like. singular electricity that makes them feel like NOTHING else. the emotional release of a hard won battle… all of those endorphins panting shiny with sweat sticky with champagne… critical awareness of where the other is at all times, leftover from the track… and then they DO decide to shake hands on the podium and there’s. a moment. a spark. something a bit different than static electricity, but not far off. and they don’t think anything of it until after the race, when dani is about to get whisked away by honda to debrief— and jorge shouldn’t even notice when dani walks away but he DOES, he can FEEL it, and something prickles and begins to TEAR. jorge feels some deep instinctual part of himself seize up with panic, and theres a shout from dani’s direction and suddenly jorge’s body is moving without his permission and he’s got dani’s face in his hands and big brown eyes are looking up at him and they are fucking ANGRY. and it’s then that he knows something is very very veryyyyy wrong.

and off they go to the motogp doctors™️ ! who are like. yep! you’re cursed ! (magic ass universe where looney tunes shit like this occasionally happens to riders who ride the edge of rivalry a little too hard. rosquez have gods biggest storm coming for them in a few years.) so you have to stay as physically close as possible to each other for a couple of months!! it’ll hopefully pass. these curses don’t effect in track stuff really so you’re are both cleared to ride 🤗👍 and PEDRENZO are both like. you have to be FUCKING kidding me. dani sitting there picking at his fingernails COMPLETELY shut down and jorge just posture tight frown dialed to ELEVEN tiny little stormcloud over their heads :) and they’re holding hands because it’s the only way they don’t feel like live ants are under their skin :) THEN the doctor is like. and you guys should probably share a bed :)

and it’s rough at the beginning! they are both VERY stubborn and while dani remains the people’s princess i think when he was younger he had the capacity to just. shut the fuck down when he was pissed. close off. and jorge is NOT shy about how uncomfortable he is about the whole thing so he’s dialed the cuntress factor allll the way up. and there’s no quick fix! it’s just time! and dani is also SELF ADMITTED !!! not a patient person. SO i IMAGINE sitting next to jorge in bed and imagining himself attempting to suffocate in his most evilest of enemy’s tits is FUN but is also not a SOLUTION. action oriented guy methinks. loves solving a problem hates when the only solution is WAIT. so it ends up being this escalating arms race of belligerent horny tension where they’re literally living in each other’s pockets holding hands touching ankles sleeping in the same bed and being TORTUROUSLY aware of the other’s body the ENTIRE time. every SLIVER of skin contact i feels like a brand. passing dani in the kitchen reaching for cereal and jorge brushes a hand on dani’s waist to lean and he feels CRAZY. INSANE. that kind of stuff. and eventually i think dani (NOT PATIENT !) fucking snaps and just. jumps him. might as well make the fucking lemonade if you have the goddamn lemons !!

the REAL problem os after the curse gets lifted (of course. the second after they fuck.) when they are USED to each other’s presence and have begun to realize how much they COMPLIMENT each other and suspect (creeping at the edges of awareness) that this mighttttt be love. but they know the other was only around for months because they were literally cursed. and now they are free to go back to the status quo. where rivalry is expected. what do they do…

[ohnococo]

Choso NSFW Alphabet

Warnings/Notes: fem!bodied reader, choking, slight breathplay, slight somnophilia.

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

Choso is surprisingly chatty after sex. Relaxed, of course, holding you close, looking into your eyes, but he asks a lot of questions. Almost like he’s recounting everything that just happened to prolong that feeling, but also taking mental notes too. Did you like when he did that? You looked so cute… and he loved that one part.

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

This is the same answer for both, he loves both of your hands. Holding them, kissing them, he loves them when you touch him, he loves when you let him guide your hands in touching him… 

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

His cum tends to be on the more watery side, slightly bitter, and he’s a shooter for sure. It’s typically a fairly average amount, but if he hasn’t cum in a while there’s loads. He’s cute when he cums too, clenching his jaw and arching his back, rocking his hips all slow and sloppy while he finishes. He gets shivers after too. 

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Despite not generally having a crazy high sex drive, he masturbates next to you in bed fairly often. He doesn’t want to bother you by waking you up, or do anything that you might not be okay with you while you’re sleeping. So he’ll just bury his face in your hair or nuzzle at your back or even hold your hand and press the softest little kisses to your face - nothing he wouldn’t normally do when he wakes up in the middle of the night cuddled up to you before drifting back off. Except one hand is stroking his cock. Once he cums he cleans himself up and cuddles back up to you like nothing happened.

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

If we’re talking canon Choso? Zero experience. Hasn’t had the time and hasn’t even thought about it to be honest, but he’s nothing if not eager to learn.

No curses AU Choso though, I do HC as having had a long term relationship or two. The first one being in school. One of those “well, we have one or two similar interests so I guess we should date” type of young relationships where they were each other's firsts for everything, because hormones are hormones, but ultimately they’re just not actually compatible. 

It, along with a similar relationship that lasted a few years in his early 20s, did kind of skew his expectations of what relationships and sex is like since it was really a proximity type relationship with no real love there. But they were young, so they perceived it as love. They had sex, but it really seemed to be a contained experience with little build up. Honestly, he’s just had the misfortune of dating fairly cold people who treated him and their sex life as just something to deal with due to incompatibility. He’s been made to feel strange for being a bit of a romantic at heart, or for being passionate and clingy. He goes into sex with a strong desire to please, but has rarely been given that energy back.

Sure, he’s kissed a few people here and there since, but hasn’t been particularly enthused about dealing with that kind of relationship again (because he’s not the type to really want sex outside of a relationship either) and honestly feels like he meets his own needs just fine on his own. Until he meets you, of course. Then it occurs to him that a relationship is more than “well I like them and get along with them I guess” and sex can be something that trickles out into more than just that moment. 

Basically, he has experience. He’s done things. But once he’s with you? He treats everything as if it’s brand new, because for him it is. In his mind all of those firsts are yours to claim.

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)

He loves positions similar to this. He wants to hold you, and be held by you. He loves being able to see you, kiss you, bury his face in your chest or neck.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

Choso is so, so serious. Especially once that emotional element finally clicks for him. He hangs onto your every word, wants you to tell or show him what makes you feel good. He wants to do anything you’ve ever wanted and puts his all into it. When his passion is returned, his whole world is in that moment with you. The best way to describe him during sex is present. You have his full, undivided attention and he doesn’t want to miss a thing. 

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

He doesn’t really do much, to be honest. The carpet does indeed match the drapes, but he’s never really thought about any special grooming. 

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…) 

Choso craves intimacy, craves that connection with you. He wants to say sappy things and look into each other's eyes and during sex has that sense of the rest of the world fading away and it’s just the two of you forever. 

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

A mess when he’s jerking off. Arm thrown over his eyes, heels pushed into his mattress, thrusting up into his hand. The only time he holds back is when he’s trying not to wake you.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

Choso likes being choked during sex. He doesn’t really know how to ask for it though, he’s worried you’ll think he’s weird and off-putting (because too many people have told him that for less), but he does absolutely love it. The first time you happen to slide your hands over his neck while you’re riding him he’ll be closing his hands over yours, squeezing a little, pleading with his eyes. Give him what he wants and he’ll cum so hard you worry he’s gonna pass out.

Honestly he miiiight have a thing for breathplay in general, loving being choked when he’s close, and loving having you ride his face with no regard for whether or not he can breathe (and best believe when he’s stroking his cock beneath you, he’ll be burying his face in your pussy when he’s close).

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)

He prefers the bedroom. He doesn’t ever want to have to hold back for any reason with you, so any messing around in public or anywhere else isn’t preferable. Say you sneak off to a bedroom at a house party to fool around, he’s not going to care if everyone knows exactly what you’re doing because he doesn’t care to be sneaky or make it quick. If you don’t mind that’s fine, but if you do maybe wait until you’re somewhere more private. 

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

If he happens to see you checking him out or if you compliment him, he’ll start getting hard immediately, wanting to let you enjoy whatever it is you were ogling firsthand. You being handsy also gets him going, even if it’s just you brushing your foot against his leg under the dinner table. Also he can’t really help that little lovey dovey chub he gets when you hold his hand.

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Threesomes are a hard no for Choso. He’s a monogamist, and for him it's just the two of you and once he’s in love he couldn’t even daydream of anyone else touching him.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

He likes giving, and has asked you to sit on his face more times than you would have ever expected of him. It just does something for him to have you on his face while he has one hand holding yours and the other gripping your thigh. It always ends with him holding you down onto his face, giving a little encouraging “mmhmm” when you grind down, trying to ease you of any worries about whether or not he can breathe. He doesn’t need to breathe right now, he just needs to make you cum.

As for getting head though? He’s just so cute when you suck his cock. Petting your cheeks, wiping away any tears if they form while taking him to the back of your throat, looking at you lovingly. It’s almost too much for him, especially if you lock eyes with him while you do it. He has to throw his head back often, eyes shut and panting because it makes his heart clench when he looks down at you like that.

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

Choso is slow and sensual for sure. He can go hard, but it’s never really rough. Even when he’s close, he prefers slow, deep strokes before pressing deep as he cums. 

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

This is a complicated one with Choso, he can go into an encounter knowing it needs to be quick, but once he’s in it what happens happens as far as he’s concerned. He likes to take his time, enjoy the moment, be present. Sometimes you both happen to get there fast, sometimes he feels pulled to wait, stopping his thrusts to hold and kiss you while his orgasm dissipates in lieu of just enjoying the journey rather than the destination. 

Sometimes you might be desperate and kissing and fucking against the wall, but he’s got the stamina to make it slow and deep and have you cumming more than once like that.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

Definite risk taker, he wants to try anything with you. When he’s finally in a relationship again there already had to be that trust for him so he’s all in now. So he is happy to do any and everything you want. Even if he’s not sure he’ll like it, he’s open since he might like it if it’s with you, right? He’ll take those risks, and take them happily.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

Choso has good stamina, and can last as long as he needs to because he’s really, really into cumming together. He’s the type to be slow to go soft even after he’s cum too and will keep idly thrusting until he can’t anymore. His refractory period is very short too so if you want to fuck all day or all night, he can and will. He loves when the nights devolve into sleepy cuddlefucking, where you’ve fallen asleep still holding each other after sex, just to wake up and fuck before falling asleep again. 

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

He doesn’t own any toys, he’s always been happy with his hands and fingers when it comes to solo play, but once he tries toys with you? He can’t believe he’s missed out so long. He loves watching you use toys on yourself, sometimes asking just to masturbate together so he can watch you make yourself cum, and once you use a vibrator on him? Well now he wants to build a little collection.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Teasing in the lead up to sex? Not at all. He’s too straightforward for that. Do you want to do something? For him the answer is yes or no, never maybe (no teasing maybes or otherwise). 

In bed though? He likes to tease as much as you like to be teased. As long as your body is tensing, lids heavy, moans getting louder, he’ll keep going so he can get more and more out of you. If that frustration builds though? He can’t continue, he’ll be kissing it better, lips peppering soft pecks across your face while he tries to hurry you along to your orgasm, as if making up for any time lost with those too-light touches. 

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make) 

Most of the time he’s not very loud, just heavy breathing and the odd groan or quiet moan. When he’s close though, the moans come out of nowhere, constant right until he’s done cumming, higher pitched and much louder than anything before, and just bordering on whines. 

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

He’s really, really good at fingering. He has nice fingers, they’re long with thick knuckles that drag across the right spots with perfect pressure. Steady with his hands, careful to go faster when you need it, keep his pace the same when you’re getting there, and he lets out the cutest groans at the sound of how wet he gets you. 

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

Girthy but with a tapered head that’s a deep colour. The vein along the side almost forms a little zigzag, and it has a considerable upward curve with a noticeable tilt to the right when he’s hard. He has heavy balls that hang quite low.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

Choso is the type to get a comfort boner quite often, or even just a happy boner. He likes being near you, being there for you, and his body makes that obvious. At the same time though, he doesn’t particularly feel like he has to do something about it. He’s easy to get going, so to speak, but happy to leave it short of sex. He doesn’t feel frustrated by ending a lengthy make out session without going further. 

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

If anything, sex will keep Choso up afterwards. He just doesn’t feel particularly sleepy after, just happy and relaxed. Even if you fall asleep, he’ll just lie there holding you, maybe giving you a few light pecks if you don’t mind.

[gcaa-official]

rian tien'er here with the first installment of common misconceptions! *cue applause*

it's really cool that i get to be the first official post on the gcaa blog, especially since i haven't been here all that long, so i wanted to start with something crazy widespread and deep-rooted:

misconception 1: goblins are inherent thieves

most people have the idea in their lil noggins that goblins are kleptomanic to the point of stealing the clothes off your back and the children in your house and it annoys me deeply for two reasons: 1) it's so blatantly rooted in anti-goblin creaturist sentiment, and 2) it's just... wrong?

the first thing that needs to be understood is that goblins have a completely different concept of possession to most other cultures - in that a person only owns that which they have a deep sentimental or emotional attachment to, with everything else 'belonging' to the community.

goblin society relies upon mutual aid and the equitable distribution of resources, and therefore there is very little room for possessiveness or individualism. additionally, in the goblinist philosophy, attachment gives items a soul that allows them to find purpose and can aid them in their efforts to help the creatures attached to them, which is why naming - an open display of strong attachment - is so important to goblin covens and gellewethes (communities centered around a coven, that are often seperate townships).

on the flip side, as we all know in aelven society, or at least much of regular calodian society, ownership relies on claim. if you say it is yours, then it is. and in legal terms, ownership relies on capital - if you bought it, then it is yours.

modern goblins understand this concept, but the aelven notion of ownership has historically been used as a tool of opression — to the point where gellewethe and goblin sacred sites are being bought from under them, making it so their forced to pay for their own land — so many goblins choose to ignore it. they usually don't steal directly from people, but from places they consider “soulless” like corporate-owned solomarkets and empty or generically decorated aristocratic homes.

those who practice this rejection of the aelven notion of ownership are known as gremlins — short for guerrilla goblinists. many gremlins also make a specific effort to target high-ranking financiers (the sector of government that controls the courts and the taxes) or nobles, and rarely, if ever steal from anyone else.

“a goblin can't tell what means the most to me!” you might say, and to that i’d say, “fuck off, pearl-clutcher!” but the truth is, they can.

to a goblin, physical proximity often dictates emotional closeness, whether by an item being directly on your skin or close to places one would consider their space. another factor is personalization, making an item or space unique to you indicates emotional attachment.

some theories have also been proposed that goblins also have a sixth sense for these things (ceilan et al., 17th dynastic year; vein and sythie 28th dynastic year) often known as ‘synwiyr aijectum’. most gellewethes reject research into this subject, so there is very little evidence for its existence or otherwise.

this misconception is also fueled by a misunderstanding of goblin ‘scores’ - small trinkets that many goblins wear either in their ears or hanging from them. goblin scores are their most valuable items, and some may be stolen, but most are gifts, things that they've found, or keepsakes of important experiences or events. scores, in goblinist philosophy, are said to be bound to the wearer’s soul and the first score in a goblin’s ear is the sign of a coming of age.

a better understanding of goblinist ideology and general goblin culture is imperative to being an ally to the goblin liberation movement, and this particular misconception is the basis of a lot of anti-goblin discrimination and contributes to goblin oppression in calodia. if you ever want to live in an equitable society, dismantling that predjuice should be your first step.

~ rian :}

may your day be one of triumph!

tldr; goblins have a totally different understanding of possession to most creatures, and any stealing they actually do is from corporations and politicians as a show of resitance, not the general populace.

[queenlucythevaliant]

Does the blood drop emoji count as a science emoji? 🩸

It absolutely does, my dear! And since you chose that particular emoji, have an evolutionary medicine/epidemiology fact.

So there are these mathematical models called the SIR models that epidemiologists use to describe and predict the behavior of infectious diseases. They look like this:

Source

From these equations, doing a bunch of math, we can get the equation for what we call R0 or R naught. This value is defined as the number of people that a single infected individual can transmit the disease to while infected. In other words, it's how contagious the pathogen is. This value changes based on selective pressures placed on the pathogen based on several environmental criteria. The model for R0 looks like this:

Source

Where beta is the number of people the infected individual interacts with in a day, N is the size of the population, gamma is the number of people who die from the illness or recover, and mu is the number of people who die from other causes. (Don't remember what p is, I took this class several years ago; it's not pertinent to my point here)

Are you ready for the awesome evolution fact that all these boring models have been building towards???

Mu is deaths from other causes. Deaths from other causes make diseases more contagious.

Infectious diseases evolve to become more contagious among soldiers in wartime.

Isn't that cool???????

We all know that throughout history, soldiers have been killed by illness at rates as high as or higher than actual battle wounds. We tend to chalk that up to poor sanitation and close proximity, but that's not the whole story.

The goal of a pathogen is to replicate itself as efficiently as possible, right? However, it also doesn't want to kill its host because then its progeny may die too. Pathogens typically accomplish these things by being either very contagious OR very virulent. Either move between as many hosts as possible and replicate relatively slowly inside all of them, or commit to the one host and replicate as fast as you possibly can. Except in a few outlying cases, pathogens can't have it both ways.

In war zones, when people are dying of other causes, a pathogen's host might die in combat in which case the pathogen's line will likely die too. Thus, there's a pressure on the pathogen to be as contagious as possible in war zones so that it can hopefully infect some people who won't die.

Okay, take a step back for a moment. Pathogens can't think. All of what I've just laid out is just a network of evolutionary pressures to which the pathogen just unthinkingly responds, because pathogens that are more contagious in war zones are more reproductively successful and in evolution, that's the only thing that matters. In war zones, the pathogens that pass the most copies of their genomes on are the ones that are most contagious.

So what does this have to do with God being awesome? For all of human history, people have died of infectious diseases at crazy disproportionate rates in war zones. We have known about this since freaking Alexander the Great. Now, through knowledge of evolution by natural selection, we understand why. It's really elegant, isn't it? Isn't it kind of beautiful? Isn't it wild that God created a universe in which we can mathematically model the selective pressures on these microbes and insodoing solve a millennia-old mystery that we didn't even realize needed solving? Isn't that kind of glorious?

[rays-of-fire-and-ice]

Ok so this is a crazy ask, so feel free to not do it, but for the shipping meme, I'm asking questions 1-15

Get to know my shippings preferences & ships!

Oh boy! This is going to be a long one!

1. List 3 shipping tropes you love

Friends/Childhood friends-to-lovers (have you seen my OTP? It's rare that I don't ship the childhood friends getting together)

Opposites attract / The grumpy one x the sunshine one (I'm putting these two tropes together because while I love opposite attract in many forms, the main kind of ship from this trope I love is grumpy one x sunshine one. Again, just look at my OTP. Also, some of the other ships I reblog, like Ichihime, Rivetra, Kyoru)

Forced proximity (this is a trope I've come to enjoy when done in certain ways, like if two characters need to work together to survive peril, or they're forced into an arrangement that neither is necessarily comfortable with, and the two come realise they might feel similarly about their predicament and start to bond and overcome what's been forced upon them)

2. List 3 shipping tropes you don’t love

Love triangles (hate them with a burning passion!!)

Instalove or instalust (I feel it takes all the development and challenges a ship can have...but if you make it that it's instalove but they discover over the course of the story that they actually work better as friends, WELL, things get more interesting!)

Bad boy x good girl (I used to love this when I was younger, but as I've grown up and gone back to some of the media that has this trope, I realised how awful some of the bad boy characters really were when they kept mistreating the good girl. I also noticed how much the narrative of 'she can change him' was being hammered in and not feeling earned when the bad boy decided to turn his life around. I think this trope can be done well if either a) the bad boy is softened to not be as much of a jerk, b) the kind girl isn't portrayed as being naive, sheltered, or someone that people just walk all over, c) if either character screws up, they get held accountable and do the hard work to make things right and change, d) if the bad boy does do something to the kind girl, that he actually apologizes and means it by showing, and e) that the kind girl is not the bad boy's sole reason to change, that he actually takes the right steps to change, like seeking help from others, and doesn't just rely on her to change him; she can be a motivation and a support for him on his journey, but not his therapist as it were).

3. One emotional aspect of a ship that always gets you

It's all about the emotion aspect for me! If I have to pick only one thing, then it's always going to be when a couple has that one emotional stunted or stoic character and they open up to the one person they feel safe to confide in. This person is always there for them, and harbors a care for them that no one or only a few people do. It's because of this and their growing feelings for them that they decide they will go through hell and high water for this person.

Bonus points if this is a slow burn and it takes the stoic character a while to fully open up, and when they do, it's an emotional outpouring (I go absolutely nuts when this happens).

Also extra points if this moments leads to the stoic person opening up to others too.

And give the work a freakin award if the person they confided in confides in them too, showing they've been through hell as well, and the two characters support each other (ABSOLUTE HEART EYES).

4. One physical aspect of a ship that always gets you

I already answered this question here.

5. Multiship or Monoship?

I'm very open to multishipping for most characters. For instance, I ship Orihime with both Ichigo and Uryu (and once upon a time it was Ulquiorra and Grimmjow...I still have a small soft spot for these ships too). However, there are characters where it's purely a monoship, and I'm sure anyone who's been on my blog for five minutes will see Toshiro is someone I can only ever see with one person. If Kubo turned around tomorrow and said Momo was going to end up with Kira [once I got over the devastation] I think I could be open to it, but Toshiro to me only has one person he could end up with and it's only ever going to be Momo for me (hehe mono, Momo, hehe).

6. Rare pairs or Mainstream?

I think there was a time where I fell into rarepair hell, but nowadays, seem to be supporting more mainstream ships. Hitsuhina has that weird distinction of being both, where it seems to be very popular in the Japanese fandom, but not so much in the Western fandom.

7. Polyamory or Monogamy?

Monogamy, but you do you if you like polyamory!

8. If the ship is physical, reversible or not?

No sure what this question means.

9. Do you always have romantic ships for fandoms?

For most of them I do, but there's the occasional fandom where I don't, like Mob Psycho 100. Whenever I ship two people, it's usually because of their chemistry and how they can develop heir own stories or flesh out each other more. This was definitely the case for Renruki, as I saw the potential for these two to have a dynamic relationship that fleshed out both their characters, and that's basically what ended up happening in the Soul Society arc.

10. How important is the sexual part (if any) of your ship?

In most of my ships, I don't really think about the sexual side of things. For instance, I get uncomfortable with Hitsuhina fanworks that have any sexual connotations around it. Don't get me wrong, teens obviously do those things, but I personally just find it uncomfortable for my OTP (the most I can stand is a heated kiss, I feel like such a wuss! ^^; ). Maybe it's because I've always seen them as a sweet, cutesy ship that don't actually start dating until their in young adult years?

Whereas for something like Renruki or Rivetra, I'm more comfortable with considering and seeing in fanworks that aspect of their relationship. In terms of fanfic, I don't go seeking out mature or explicit fics that are 'porn without plot', I always read fics that have a plot or character exploration and just so happen to have sexual content in them.

I don't know, I think it depends on the vibe of the ship and the kind of chemistry they have together. Hitsuhina has a sweet chemistry, whereas something like Rivetra or Renruki has a more mature chemistry.

11. Opinion on platonic ships?

I COULD EASILY FILL A TOP 50 LIST WITH BROTPS! My goodness platonic relationships are awesome and just as important as romantic ships in any and all media. In fact, I wish I had more confidence to write BROTP fics, it's only something I started to delve into when I joined tumblr.

12. List 3 ships you currently love

Aside from my OTP (because I'll always love them), I'm currently in love with:

Gabiyui from Hell's Paradise: Jigokuraku (*gross sobbing* OH MY GOD THEY'RE SO BEAUTIFUL!)

Hananene from Jibaku Shounen Hanako-Kun (*sobs a river* OH MY GOD THEY'RE SO TRAGIC!)

Renruki (*tears in my eyes* It's good that they're canon!)

13. List 5 OTPs from past fandoms

I only have one OTP, and I decided to cheat a little for this one by listing every ship I had in each of these fandoms:

Tokyo Ghoul: Nishikimi, Touken, Mutsurie

Dream Daddy: a Dad Dating Simulator: Damien x Dadsona, Damien x Hugo, Robert x Dadsona, Craig x Dadsona

Harry Potter: Drastoria, Helga x Salazar, Romione, Harmony, Snily, Jily

Death Note: L x Misa

Ouran Highschool Host Club: Haruhi x Tamaki, Haruhi x Hikaru, Haruhi x Kaoru

14. Opinion on the importance of marriage?

For shipping, it's not a big deal. I just love seeing the couple happy and content. I must admit though, I have had ideas for weddings and what certain ships' marriages would be like. Of course, I've wondered and even written a fic about Hitsuhina's future marriage, and even drew their wedding day a long time ago. I was happy to see Renji and Rukia get married, it just felt right for them, and an Ichihime marriage is just so cute!

15. Opinion on kids?

Again, not a big deal for me in shipping. I never go out of my way to find fics where a ships children are involved. If they're in canon, like Ichika and Kazui, then I don't mind and even love seeing some of the fanworks creators come up with the family dyamics from Ichihime and Renruki, but for the most part I just stick to canon and don't go out fo my way to find fics or fanart involving potential children from any of my ships.

Thanks for sending this in! :D

[fairysbookshelf]

To Kill A Shadow By Katherine Quinn

Book Stats:

Rating:⭐⭐⭐(2.75/5)

Spice Rating: YA❤️

Tropes: Knife to Throat, Forced Proximity, Love Triangle

Publisher: Entangled Teen

Summary:

Kiara Frey just wanted to protect her little brother, low and behold, that just means she gets thrown in on a crazy death mission into the Mist that has cursed the kingdom for as long as Kiara could remember. Add in a grumpy commander, Jude who is one of the only people to survive the Mist in the first place, Kiera now has to figure out how to survive, while also protecting her very deadly secret.

Review:

Y'all. I had really, really, high hopes for this book. Seriously, I love romance, but I will always be a fantasy girl first. I had to fight tooth and nail to finish it......

The world and concept behind the book is honestly very well thought out. I will applaud the author for good worldbuilding. Most of the time, it isn't enough, but Katherine Quinn does a great job of pushing the reader into the world. It definitely gave me Red Queen vibes meets Shatter Me. I do like the unique things about the world-like Kiara's power, that being said, I don't think it is significant enough to make me like this book more....

It truly is a cool concept for a book, just not executed well. The first 100 pages or so had me hooked, and then it just died. I will say though the climax of the book came out of no where, I wasn't excited for it. I had give up on liking this book at that point. The Climax itself though didn't make a lot of sense anyway.

Kiara and Jude lacked a lot of chemistry. I'm not sure if it's because the character's themselves are lacking demeton, or what, BUT, it feels like their relationship is forced and that is really not what you want. Especially when your forcing your romance plot over the fantasy plot(The whole point of ROMANTASY is a fantasy plot with a SIDE PLOT of romance, not the other way around). When your romance plot is taking up 75% of the book, and your characters don't have much chemistry, it makes your reader very bored.

Kiara and Jude just felt like stereotypes. A author writing to fill trope quotes and not to write itself. Kiara started out with a Mulan type personality and then formed into some what of a pick me. Jude..... where to begin? He tired to be so tragic and traumatized but in reality, he just felt like he was begging for attention.

[bmodiwrites]

If you are still accepting prompts I have the cutest idea I saw in a Tiktok - Eddie kisses Steve in the upside down before they part ways and Eddie says make him pay - Eddie and Dustin go to distract the demobats etc

But with like love confessions and pinning and Eddie surving

absolutely loved Voulez-Vous so much like I don’t have enough words to describe it!!!

Always, pal! I'll admit that I hadn't seen the Tik Tok until it came across my dash the other day, so I've been sitting on this one. I'm stoked to finally have an idea for it! & thank you - it's one of my favorites, too! This got a little long, hope you don't mind!!

Locked in the back of a stolen RV parked in an ammo store parking lot, Eddie contemplated the idea of being trapped. In the last forty hours, Eddie came to understand the concept of an animal cornered better than anyone else. And truthfully, only some of that feeling of confinement came from being wanted by the police.

Which was his own fault - there wasn't a single doubt about that. Eddie knew enough about the workings of reality to be aware of the dangers of falling for the wrong person, for the person that, until a day or two ago, Eddie was trained to despise. In a world where Eddie was the freak and a fine line existed between hate and love, there was a smidgen of poetic justice exhibiting itself in the fact that Eddie Munson was falling for Steve Harrington.

It hadn't been all that gradual, either.

To be fair, Eddie had always found Steve's particular aesthetic to be visually pleasing. Who walked around with that much hairspray in their hair without looking for a certain kind of attention, anyway? He had heard all of the rumors started by many of the prettier girls of Hawkins's student body, even bought into them as much as they did. As a young male of a certain age, many of those whispers fueled shame filled fires in moments of weakness - but that was just the idea of him.

Luck, the bastard of an ideal, was flighty in the sense that it brought good fortune right around the time the world was going to shit - especially in Eddie's case. He never thought that a moment of shared eye contact in a state of paranoia would cascade into something that was a long distance from lustful thoughts and stolen personal moments in private.

Steve, despite Eddie's sincere surprise, was like a beating heart. He filled himself up with care and appreciation for the people he chose to have around and pumped out protection like blood through a valve. Though his wit was much more subtle, Eddie appreciated the strength and bravery in the actions he took to offer that protection. Steve even extended that gift to Eddie, which was entirely unexpected from the imago he created of 'the hair' throughout his years in high school.

Never mind the fact that, when all was said and done, Steve was genuine and funny - really goddamn funny. When the kids first started coming to Hellfire Club meetings, Eddie didn't want to believe anything that came out of Dustin's mouth - he truly meant that when he told Steve so. It was impossible to think that Steve Harrington was both good looking and halfway decent. More than halfway, even.

That meant the feelings Eddie always tried to lock away inside of himself were for someone genuinely worth the brain bytes.

Shifting his position on the uncomfortable seat, Eddie reached up to run a shaky hand through the fringe of bangs already in disarray. Now was the absolute worst time to contemplate the inner workings of the most disastrous crush to ever happen, yet he couldn't keep his mind from worrying at it incessantly, like a tongue against a sore tooth.

Mostly because Eddie wasn't far away from being convinced that Steve felt the same.

It was crazy, Eddie already knew that. His thoughts were outreaching all portions of reality that were rational and sensical in any way. Putting that aside, Eddie's brain stuck to the close proximity and probing questions that felt akin to trying to get to know someone. In a moment of weakness, Eddie allowed himself to get carried away, but the consequences weren't what he figured. Steve looked taken aback and somewhat entertained without a sign or symptom of anger or outrage. Eddie wondered what Steve might've done if Robin wasn't standing right there, mediating the interaction.

Of course, Eddie never forgot that Steve was a perpetual flirt that had no conscious recollection of the fact that he was doing such a thing. That kept up a permanent residence in his mind - which was clearly battling with those small periods in time that Eddie was sure Steve was treating him that way for real. There were some looks that just couldn't be faked without at least a little genuine feeling.

Regardless, Eddie was stuck between a giant rock and a very hard place. It looked like there was no end in sight for him, either.

Thankfully, the door of the RV opened and Ericka Sinclair came running in to break up all his wayward thoughts - her eyes were hardened with a determination that shouldn't exist in someone that young. Though, that didn't matter when they were crammed into a stolen vehicle with all of their lives on the line. In the moment, age and class and HP and prior experience in the field didn't matter. They were all equal players on the board.

Things were a whirlwind for a while where Eddie had little time to do anything but hammer nails into a trash can lid and cling to the little moments with Dustin - his friendship with the kid was real, tangible, something he could touch. Worth more of his time than thoughts that cost too much. He would've hated himself if Steve Harrington took up the entirety of his mental capacity while a bit of peace still existed. Especially when Dustin Henderson was so goddamn cute and worthy of the attention.

And while he was strong enough to stick to that resolve all the way through the journey into the Upside Down, Eddie couldn't keep it together long enough to watch Steve walk away - not when he turned in their direction for one last look, last quip, last second of time sharing the same breath. Eddie didn't have it in him to let Steve go without doing something.

Not waiting for rationality to win over control, Eddie let go and gave in - "Steve, wait."

All of the sudden, wide brown eyes were on him and every thought, every thing Eddie knew, every everything vanished. His feet carried him forward like the path was pulling him there on its own accord. The glint of his rings were bright in the haze of the Upside Down, drawing his eye just seconds before they were stuck in the hem of Steve's jacket. It took but a small yank to have Steve close to him, and another moment of drawing breath for their lips to be against each other kissing, sharing something so real and visceral.

It was only seconds, that Earth moving kiss, but it ensnarled Eddie in a grip so tight that it was hard to pull away. There were so many things to say, truths to utter, yet he settled on "make him pay" - it was no wonder that he only got a breathless nod in return. He kept Steve in his grasp until it was too much; forcing his fingers to work under his command was difficult but he let go, he had to. Eddie nodded back, gulping in a large gasp of air to deal with the empty space the sight of Steve walking away brought about.

He took another second to slap a lid on the well in his heart, then turned to Dustin with a grin - "now for the fun part!"

Dustin followed him silently into the trailer with a contemplative look on his face. Once they were inside, he yanked on Eddie's vest. "What the heck was that?" The squint of his eye made him look a little funny and Eddie had to work hard not to laugh. His nerves for what was to come were starting to creep back in, so the distraction of Dustin's exasperation was surprisingly welcome.

"Something to be dealt with later, Henderson. There's a concert to put on." Eddie kept his expression hard, though he was grateful for this brief moment of normalcy before the shit hit the fan. It was almost like they weren't walking straight into a raging fire.

Despite the circumstance behind his impromptu performance, Eddie was loathe to admit that it was epic all the same. With Dustin on his knee rocking out beside him, the task of distraction took on a shiner texture. Fun was an odd word to apply to a life or death situation, yet nothing else fit. Feeling his fingers fly over the strings in a flawless rendition of a song he'd been working on tirelessly was exemplary - Eddie was certain he'd never had a prouder moment.

The glitz and shine of it was unsurprisingly overshadowed by the arrival of a large swarm of bats circling them that suddenly made Eddie feel like a sitting duck. For all intents and purposes, their portion of the plan was over. As the noises started to get louder against the outside of the trailer, Eddie worried they weren't quite as prepared as they originally realized.

When the squeals of the demobats started to make his eardrums ache, Eddie was certain they were done for. It would make no sense to go through the gate while completely overran by beasts that could do major damage back in their reality. His gut was churning with the rapid pitch of thoughts and ideas whipping through his brain, never mind the adrenaline coursing through his veins. All of the sudden, what sounded like a large storm overtook the trailer.

Eddie closed his eyes, certain they were seconds away from battling for their life when utter silence followed. He was frozen in place, his ears peeled in wait for the other shoe to drop. As the quiet persisted, Eddie got some of the feeling back in his limbs, allowing him to turn around. He and Dustin shared a confused look before the ground beneath them started to shake.

"Get through the gate, Dustin," Eddie said, grabbing onto Dustin's shoulders. "I'll follow you." And while it was the truth, Eddie wasn't stupid enough to think Dustin wouldn't realize he had other plans before that would happen. He tightened his grip, silently trying to drive his point home. There was a tense second before Dustin nodded.

They were seconds away from splitting up when the trailer door banged open and Robin ran through it. She was carrying what looked to be a thick stick with an alcohol soaked rag wrapped around it that was caught on fire; like an old fashioned torch. Nancy and Steve were hot on her tail, running in with panted breaths and scared but triumphant looks in their eyes.

"We need to get the hell out of here," Steve shouted - his point was further driven home by the ground shaking again, this time with more intensity. No one hesitated to run down the hall into Eddie's room to quickly climb up the sheet ladder back where they all belonged. Thankfully, they were all through before his ceiling sealed up with only the slightest scar left behind.

No one spoke for many moments. It took a while for adrenaline to settle and breaths to be caught, for reality to sink in. Everyone was looking everywhere, like none of them could believe that some small part of the madness was over and done with.

It took a surprising amount of time for words to finally break the silence. Dustin was eager to know what exactly happened and once the shock wore off, Nancy was happy to explain. It came down to El being a badass with her jedi mind tricks; she subdued Vecna just long enough for Nancy to further prove her awesomeness with well aimed shoots. And fire - they used lots of fire.

When all was said and done, the resolution left something to be desired, but Eddie was not one to look a gift horse in the mouth. There were still many obstacles to overcome that any amount of success was a win. He made it out with his life after playing the most epic metal concert of his life - how much more could Eddie really ask for?

Except, the threat of dying wasn't keeping the thoughts of that kiss and what it could mean at bay anymore. While it'd been only a little easier to hold them back when life wasn't guaranteed, those persistent wants and ideas existed in the back of Eddie's mind, festering away. His performance, the stellar playing, that was fueled by the desire to contribute and help and maybe, at the end of it all, come out on the other side of things well enough to see something through with Steve. That's probably why Eddie was able to give himself into the music the way he did.

Still, the question of whether Steve reciprocated his feelings remained. Was hours after saving the world the best time to step up and ask something so life changing? Eddie knew the answer was no but the thought of waiting around just to see what happened next didn't seem all that good, either. That sort of unanswered question was nefarious, easily bringing stronger people to their knees. Maybe the small taste of death made him braver than before, or maybe, Eddie was just tired of hesitating, of turning his back when things he wanted were right there before him - reaching out suddenly wasn't the scariest thing in Eddie's world, anymore.

After collecting Dustin, Max, and Ericka from the Creel house, the party sunk into the warmth of Steve's empty place, happy to be home. When the celebrating was done, everyone split up to nurse wounds and get some well needed rest. Eddie waited until all the kids were taken care of before starting his hunt for Steve. It didn't take long for him to literally stumble into the younger boy - Eddie missed the top step leading upstairs and sent himself flying, right into the arms of Steve Harrington.

As he straightened himself up, Eddie tried to formulate the right thing to say that showed gratitude and made him look cool all at once. Though, a soft "thanks" slipped out, instead. His voice was pitched low, like anything louder than a whisper would break up the moment.

Steve's arms tightened around Eddie's middle where they settled in his attempt to keep Eddie upright. He looked contemplative for a second, then the tiniest of smiles overtook his lips. "I think this is becoming a habit, us saving each other."

Eddie was struck by the truth of that simple statement. It'd been so easy, sucking up all the fear in his heart and stepping out onto a thin limb. He didn't hesitate to jump headfirst into the water after Steve got dragged down. It was like second nature to grab the nearest weapon to swing away demobats with. Eddie didn't even bat an eye at the idea of being a distraction. When bigger, more important things were on the line, Steve's life and that of the rest of his friends too, Eddie could do nothing but make a habit out of doing anything to keep them safe.

In the end, Eddie settled with "yeah, maybe" as his answer, because anything else would've opened up the floodgate of emotions that were too big for the space in time they were currently occupying. Eddie's brain only had room for so much and he already felt a little overrun.

Of course, Steve's answering grin and the close proximity of their chests made it difficult to think about anything other than the pulsing need to lean forward and kiss him again. Maybe, after keeping it all in for so long, the feelings couldn't be held back any longer.

"I think I might love you," Eddie said in one long breath, blurting the words out into the open. Since they were already out there, he barreled on. "I think that's why it's so easy to be selfless and heroic when you're around. I'd do anything, Steve, to see you safe."

There was a heavy breath and the shift of feet on the hardwood below them, elongated the small silence following Eddie's confession. Though Steve hadn't dropped his hold or moved away, he hadn't said anything, either. Eddie wanted to stuff his head into the nearest wall - now that the world wasn't ending, maybe the previous bravery guiding his actions was too much for the return of a slower reality.

"So that's what that kiss was about," Steve finally said. His voice was laced with realization, like a light bulb had lit up brightly above his head. When their eyes met then, Eddie saw clarity and what might've been the beginnings of happiness in Steve's gaze. He looked at Eddie like one would a finished puzzle - triumphant and battle worn and glad to see all of the pieces finally fitting together.

"Would it be okay if I might love you back?" Steve asked, voicing his question as their faces drifted closer and closer. By the time the last word settled into the air between them, their lips were brushing, ghosting together in the smallest semblance of a kiss. It was too much and not enough and all Eddie wanted.

With one small shift forward, Eddie closed that final gap, kissing Steve softly in answer. Their lips lingered and fused, combining in a way that spoke of a new start and the possibility of forever that wasn't there before. This time, when Eddie drew away, he wasn't afraid to let Steve go. He knew, after fighting together and protecting each other that Steve, as long as he could, would always come back to him.

No matter the cost.

Steddie Prompts

[canyouhearthelight]

The Miys, Ch. 206

In which I relentlessly mock Sophia for being nosy, while also addressing some of the questions @baelpenrose, @quantumizedinsanity, and @writing-with-olive brought up when the last chapter featuring Noah was being written. And some other questions that came up in my own mind while I tried to go to sleep several nights in a row, because hyperfocusing on the plot is what I do to combat insomnia.

Reader shoutout this week is for @nicestpamkale.

Extra shoutout for everyone who has been suffering through my drawing skills while I tackle Inktober 2022.  To the three very nice people who alerted me that someone is stealing my posts.... GOSH I wish. Unfortunately, I’m posting the art both here and on my main blog, @areasontobreathe.

Help request: I got xkit for Firefox, but can’t find the plug in to build my tag clusters so I don’t have to type out all the tags. If you know where I can get it, please PM me!

After leaving Arthur’s office, I felt compelled to meddle.  Asshole could have just told me, I sulked while fervently hoping that Simon figured out that Nixe was somewhat interested in him.  Adding to my pout was the fact that Arthur had been spot on - Teeth was already adopted, and the only thing I could do was ask Charly or Nixe if either knew exactly why their goblin had been hanging upside down so much. After that, it was in their capable hands.

To burn off some energy, I decided to walk the ship.  I had several hours of spare time, and this could be counted as cardio. After all, the Ark was huge, Tyche and Charly were both at work, and it was my off shift.  A couple hours of meandering were very much overdue.

I made it a whopping four decks before realizing there was a massive presence rather close to me. “Geezus, Noah.” Jumping, a hand landed on my sternum as I tried to calm down. “Warn a girl next time.”

“I was not aware your proximity alert was disabled.”

Waving vaguely at my head, I explained. “I’m walking through the ship during a busy time of day.  My options are mute it and assume that bystanders will see anything crazy, or let it keep going off for hours on end.”

Four blunt appendages flew up in an approximation of a human surrender. “Administrator Costa has demonstrated the auditory equivalent of the alert. I believe I understand why you would temporarily disable it.”

My hand swept flat in a pretty standard there ya go. “Can I help you?”

“I would like to hear your thoughts regarding the recent proposal.”

Oh.

“Well then, walk with me.” The smile plastered on my face was less forced than I had expected it to be. “I actually did have some questions, so your timing is perfect.”

“The previous discussion was quite brief, as I understand it in human terms, so inquiries are welcome if they will assist in decision making.”

“Awesome,” I exhaled. “I thought about it a lot, and really my biggest concern is… we’re talking about a life form that has lived solely on a starship for hundreds if not thousands of years.  Teeth only lived on one for about twelve, and they’re having a hard enough time adapting.  But on the other side, the comparisons I have available range from subsisting on plant collagen all the way to actually eating radioactivity and even high risk pollutants.  I can’t tell if the environment suggested will be too extreme or not extreme enough.”

“Tens of thousands of years would likely be most accurate, which further validates your concern.” A vomu gestured elegantly around us. “However, testing has shown they are able to survive and adapt quite quickly to the environment on the Ark, so estimates indicate that they will be fine on Von.”

“Even with the temperature extremes?” I pointed out. “Regardless of how flexibly the Ark is designed - and I mean, this ship is pretty awesome - humans have an incredibly broad range of tolerable temperatures.  It won’t be comfortable for us, but we can take it.  It’s the whole reason this planet was selected for our relocation - literally no one else could survive the damned thing, so it was free for colonization.”

That bought me about two decks of silence before one spidery hand started rubbing their eyespots. “I will admit, extensive testing has been done in the BioLabs to ensure the temperature range could be tolerated.”

I stopped abruptly. “How extensive?”

“Extensive enough to know that the aquaponics lab is tolerable and yet entirely unpleasant.”

“Steamy hot cow farts will do that…” I bopped my head for a moment in consideration. “That’s good, but there’s another issue: the hive mind sentience threshold.  As new bodies develop, will it be fast enough to replace the ones that are being worn out by any unexpected changes in environment?  Or will they at some point, however brief, lose sentience?  You pointed that out, yourself, when we realized that Else was allowing themself to die to keep from killing us.”

“There may or may not be several fully mature bodies already on the Ark from the environmental and temperature extremes testing.”

I groaned before continuing my walk. “Is there a percentage I should be asking about?”

“Working with our most recent information on the planet, enough. Given the age of the data?” They paused. Noah never paused, and my stomach sank. “Hopefully enough? Is that the term?”

Anxiety sped my steps up even further. “Shouldn’t you already know this? There has to be data somewhere. Or ancestral knowledge, or… I dunno, something. There’s no way y - this being could have existed for so long, and have no definite idea of what the exact threshold is.”

“In broad strokes, the information exists.  But in fine detail, less so.  It is apparently profoundly rare for one to go below the sentience threshold before reaching one which can absorb them to avoid the loss of knowledge. And in the cases where the loss has occurred - “

I waved off the rest of the sentence. “Yeah, I get it… can’t exactly report how many there were when you lost sentience if you’re not sentient anymore.”  I let the conversation lull for a bit, until we get to a less crowded area. “But why come to me? You and I weren’t even on speaking terms.”

“We spoke.”

“We were on speaking terms at the same level that I am on speaking terms with a food console.” The comparison was blunt, but accurate.  “You still have somewhat cordial relationship with several people. Hell, on the Council alone, you are on semi-social terms with Xiomara, Huynh, and Charly.”

“All of whom, as well as most others you could suggest, currently need to focus all of their spare energy on the tasks surrounding settlement on a new world.”

Figured.

“In addition to this,” Noah continued, “Due to the exact incident to which you are alluding, you feel a strong need to make amends, in addition to being the last person I would be expected to ask such a favor of.”

“Wooooooooowwwwwwww,” I drew out, half laughing. “You know how to make a girl feel special.”

Randomly picking an Else-chick off the wall, they stroked it gently before setting it on a limb. “Odvub is also interested in you, and I find that intriguing.”

“Odvub is fascinated by humans,” I corrected.

“Indeed. But you were the first human to inquire about even the potential of such a being, much less being able to identify a signal you were never expected, intended, or even conceivably believed capable of identifying. All by a pattern.  Odvub is fascinated by clever beings, I have found.”

Both of my hands raised over my head, and I twirled without stopping my forward progression. “Look around you, dude. The Ark has what might be the highest concentration of clever humans to ever exist. Sure, we’re assholes, bastards, and broken in mind, body, and soul, but we are very clever.”  My hands dropped, and I choked out in a whisper. “When you can’t escape, you don’t survive the end of your world without being clever.”

Thankfully, they let that statement pass without response. We walked for nearly half an hour before I spoke again.  “So, you told me because, of all the clever-ass people on the Ark, I’m the one who wasn’t busy.”

“It is an overly simplistic answer, but essentially correct.”

“Damn, Noah. I thought we were friends.”

“We were what humans would call ‘friends’. I would like to believe we still are.  However, I also consider other people on the Ark my ‘friend’, but I do not trust them to keep a secret. As I said previously, others, such as Charly, cannot be distracted.”

My pout was back. “I want to be really, really mad, but it’s really hard to be angry at being second-place to Charly.”

“She is incredibly likeable, unfortunately.  It’s terrifying.”

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[sukirichi]

earned it [02]

Gojo Satoru is a firm believer that if you work hard for it then you shall earn it. But on the other side, he’s not unfamiliar with his own sins. He also believes that there is punishment due for his sins as he’s earned it.

cw. mentions of murder, suggestive content, unedited fic

notes. err, i’m only doing this on impulse. i would like to continue it, but i think part one stands enough for itself :> i might delete this if i don’t like it a few days later lollll

series masterlist

Your infamous customer hadn’t arrived even as the restaurant closed. You watched close enough, fidgety in your movements and often bumping into other servers, all because your gaze kept darting back to the front door, awaiting his presence.

There’s no actual reason why you want to see him. Maybe it’s because he left an impression? The guy didn’t even budge after finding out someone had snuck into the kitchen to poison him, leaving you to wonder why anyone wanted to kill him. Not that it was any of your business, but you figured it was only common between powerful people who are equally greedy. Still, you’re unfocussed in your work, apologizing every now and then when your boss shook their head at you.

Thankfully, you managed to get back to your old pace. Thoughts of the white-haired tall man left the room at the same time everyone did, leaving only you and your boss in the locker room. You ended up working two shifts again on this weekend, your co-worker asking you to cover for them due to sudden family issues.

It’s tiring, that much is for sure, but you won’t complain when it’s more money down in your pocket. You’re dazzled, however, as you leave the locker room and see that your main chefs are still there.

Upon seeing you, they immediately usher you into a lone table, table 98 that remained untouched the whole night, a two lit candles illuminating the otherwise darkness of the isolated restaurant. Only this time, it’s occupied by him no less, his azure eyes flittering up to yours at the sound of your hesitant footsteps.

You’ve been looking for him the whole night, yet now that he’s in front of you, you don’t have any words to say. Instead, you bow down deep, the hands clasped in your lap shaking.

“S-Sir.”

“No need to be so nervous. I only wish to discuss something with you,” his laugh is so carefree, lighthearted as he gestures to the empty spot across him. “Take a seat,” Wordlessly, you foolow his orders and dash down to the seat, spine straight and head held high. There’s a hint of amusement in his small smile, but he doesn’t tease you, save for the lilting tone he held. “So you’re in sophomore year of university?”

“Yes, Sir. How’d you know?” You furrowed your brows, unsure of whether you’re supposed to expensive meal served in two.

Gosh, and this was on page three too, a single meal cost at least six months’ worth of rent.

“I pulled a string or two,” he lifts one shoulder lazily, waving his knife in the air. “And please, call me Satoru. Assuming we come to an understanding, things will go well for the both of us. You are in need of financial aid, yes?” You nod, utterly clueless in where this is leading, but Satoru’s already made up his mind long before he came here that he found no need in beating around the bush.

“Good. Then what do you say about being my sugar baby?”

“S-sugar baby?” you repeat the word first in confusion, then with distaste. He simply hums around the meat he’s eating, as if it’s a normal occurrence for him to inquire such things, and you scoff, crossing your arms on your chest.

You don’t care that this guy is your precious customer – he was just the same as everyone else.

“Is that the reason why you asked me to stay behind? Do you think you can just pay people to sleep with you? It may have worked on others, but not to me. I would rather keep my dignity than be with you,” you breathe hard after your rant, slapping your palms down on the table. The impact of it makes the table shake, his hand reflexively reaching to steady his wine glass. “As for what happened yesterday, you don’t have to thank me about it. I did what any right-minded person would.”

“And if I said I never wanted to be saved?” he asks, his tone still so calm that it further infuriates you. You stare at him, stunned and mouth gaping. “Sit down. I didn’t mean it that way.”

“Thank you for graciousness, Sir, but I really don’t—”

“Angel,” You freeze at the nickname. He chuckles with his forehead pressed to his clasped hands, “Do you really think I need to pay people to sleep with me? I could have anyone I want,” his voice falls an octave or two, the sonorous warning rumbling something…alien inside your body. You stand there, unable to move, and he easily sees through this as he hides a smirk behind his drink. “Sit down. I’m not done talking to you.”

You don’t know what snapped in you to actually follow, but his words weren’t just that. They were always laced with eased dominance, the words leaving his lips coming out as a command. No, it was more like a hypnotizing order, and you’re nothing but a puppet enslaved by it.

His smile only grows bigger, and you hate that he looks ridiculously handsome under the dim lights of the room. Life would’ve been much easier if this man had been ugly.

“As I was saying, this relationship should be casual, no strings attached. I’d prefer if you’re exclusive to me, and in return, I’ll cover all your school fees and everything else. As for the sex,” he cuts his eyes straight to yours, an intense burning heat in them. You squirm in your seat, a little intimidated, albeit excited, by this proposition too, though you’d rather die than let him know that, “I don’t need that from you. I just want someone to talk to.”

“You’re paying me to talk to you?”

“No,” he chuckles, “I’m saying you form a relationship with me in exchange of financial aid. You’d be similar to a lover, nothing less of a friend,” he stares at his drink so hard like he was having a debate with it. A few seconds later, he found his answer, the gleam in his eyes surreptitious as he says, “Someone I can trust.”

You huff. Surely it wasn’t easy as that. “Why me?”

“No reason,” he shrugged, “I just find you endearing, that is all,” You lean back on your seat, trying to process all this. The hesitance must be written all over your face because he adjusts his tie, sliding a white business card your way before sliding his chair back in. At least he’s well-mannered enough to do that. “You can take your time to think about it. There’s no need to rush.”

Somehow, seeing his figure retreat triggers something within you. You watch as silhouettes emerge from the darkness trail after him; must be his security team, serving as an additional note that what you so struggled to achieve was likely nothing for him.

Was it fear? Desperation? Shame?

You don’t know, you won’t ever really know, but you run up to him anyway, brave enough to tug at his sleeve. The guards surrounding him tense up at the contact, stepping away only when he raises a finger that spoke a thousand words.

“You-you’ll pay for everything?”

With his back turned to you, you failed to see that victorious grin he wore. “And everything more,” he reassured. He turns around to confirm your submission, but you’re quivering under his towering frame, poor hands clutched around the card so tightly he won’t be surprised if you break it. He chuckles, coaxing the worries out of you as he caresses your cheek, his breath evident of expensive liquor hitting your cheeks. “Relax, angel. It’s not like you’re selling your soul to the devil.”

Your pupils blow wide at the close proximity. If he was attractive before, it’s nothing compared to the clarity of his sharp, angular features that are softened by his playful smile. Oddly enough, his thumb caressing your cheeks is tender yet calloused.

There’s no telling when who put who under a spell, because you’re clutching helplessly at his suit jacket, whispering, “Am I not?”

You are, he wants to say, but you’re so innocent, so vulnerable – such an angel, he can’t help but hum in his head – that he doesn’t have the heart to let you know. He already knew things were bound to fall out of place one another, but until that hasn’t happened yet, he’ll have to keep you close. He’ll make you his.

“I’ll take good care of you,” he declares so confidently that you couldn’t even question his capability to do so you, and for a moment, just a moment, your knees weaken under his stare. “Now that, I can promise.”

Should you have pulled away then? When he leaned down to seal the contract with a kiss, should you have pulled away then? Or better yet, could you even pull away then?

You’ve been so alone your whole life that each moment with him is awakening, soul-crushing, mind-shattering and so damn weakening that you should’ve pulled away then. If anyone were to tell you you’d share your first kiss after work hours with a man whose name you don’t even know of, you’d tell them they were crazy, crazier if they claimed you would enjoy it.

But you did. Oh, you did, you were addicted to him – his taste, his scent, his touch, everything about him – that when he pulled away, taking away every last breath in your lung that formerly remained taint-free by him, you’re left wanting. Craving.

And he knows this. How could he not? Your eyes are hazy with lust, chest pressed against his firm ones that would soon be the same body you found home over and over again.  You’re not the only left intoxicated from this sudden agreement. Whatever you feel, he feels it twice as much after years of watching you from the sidelines, asking himself a million times over what it is about you that pulled him in so much in the first place.

The innocence? The dedication? The youthful naivety?

Gojo wants to laugh at himself. It was never any of those – he simply wanted to fool himself that maybe he’s worthy of this, of your love, of your purity. He’s selfish, manipulative, heartless, and he wants nothing more than someone like you to make him feel like he’s everything he’s not.

He steps forward to brush his nose against yours; breathing in the tiny gasps you reward him with. And he’s barely even touched you.

“I look forward to our next meeting,” he rasps, butterfly touches all the way down your back to hold you flush against him, letting you feel that he’s all muscle and hardness, while you’re the complete opposite, composed of softness and little ghosting kisses. Perhaps when he gives you by a name, he was right to call you –  “My Angel.”

The loud blaring of your alarm cuts through the silence of the room, its shrill sound piercing your ears. You groan, blindly patting the bedside table to swipe snooze. The spot next to you has been cold for a while now, but it’s normal for Satoru to leave early for work that you burrow yourself deeper in the covers. Five more minutes of sleep shouldn’t be so bad; it’s the weekend, anyway. You’ve got nothing else to do.

Waking up after that, on the other hand, now that is an impending task on itself.

You’re beyond sore, your inner thighs littered with handprints and your shoulder covered in love bites. “Jeez,” you mutter to yourself, stepping out of the bathroom. Tying your robe around you, you go out your shared bedroom, rubbing your eyes to get the sleep out.

It’s past noon already – Satoru really wore you out. And fuck, you could barely walk. You had to grip the counters just to sit on the stools, and even then, you’re wincing from the pain.

He should be doing paperwork in his office right now or something; he never really told you what to do. You don’t feel like asking either since he’s made it clear he prefers to keep his personal life, well…personal. But nevertheless, you swing your legs back and forth on the stool, texting him a quick I love you baby :)

Satoru doesn’t reply.

Usually, he’d respond in a few minutes, always supplied with a wink and an eggplant emoji. It was so him to act this way, that when those few minutes turned into a few hours and you’re met with radio silence, you can’t help but worry.

You try to brush it off, ignoring the deafening silence that rings all over his penthouse. He’s busy, he’s working, he’s got things to do – that’s all it is.

You convince yourself hard enough that you’ve cleaned the place until it’s sparkling, your reflection bouncing off the black marble floors. Every minute, though, your mind would race back to him. Not thinking about him proved to be a really daunting task because you think of him when you’re eating, reminiscing the way he’d always surprise you with a back hug, muttering morning angel all over your skin just to distract you from your meal. You think of him as you’re killing time with boring dramas; if he was here, he’d nudge your leg with his foot, pushing your shorts until it exposes your panties. He’d make sure you don’t get to focus at all, riling you up and kissing you hard that the show playing becomes nothing but background noise. You think of him, you dream of him, you remember him – and yet, you can’t feel him.

Nails bitten down to the skin, you scramble for your phone, swiping call over his contact. It doesn’t go through. Now that’s another odd thing; Satoru never fails to pick up your calls.

“He’s just busy,” you lie to yourself, telling the same thing over and over again even as night falls and you’re staring at the empty left side of the bed, hands smoothing over where the curve of his body would’ve been. “He’s just busy,” you say once more, giving into the exhaustion brought on by your worries. “He’ll come home soon. He always will.”

Except he didn’t.

And that was two weeks ago.

“Angel, I got you—” Satoru immediately clamps his shut, his footsteps muted as he walks closer to you. You’ve been dating for a few months now, and you’re still very wary of the nature of your relationship so you refuse to move in with him. He doesn’t mind, he respects your space and decisions, but now he’s starting to regret letting you have your way. You’re hunched over your swiveling chair, cheek pressed against the opened textbook and glasses perched on your hair. The lamp desk illuminates the dark circles lining your eyes, his heart breaking at the sight.

Thanks to his help, you’ve been able to spend more time focusing on your studies. It should be comforting, but Satoru’s heart aches as he thinks of what you’ve been like prior to meeting him.

How long have you stayed up all night just to pass your exams? How long have you cried yourself to sleep, unable to handle the burden placed by the world on your shoulders at such a young age? How long have you had to turn down friends’ invites to parties with a forced smile because you had to go to work? How many times have you stared at a failing mark, teeth clenched because you studied well for it; your exhaustion just got the best of you and muddled your brain?

Satoru places the beer and dinner he’s got you on his way back home on top of your one-man dining table, pressing a kiss at the top of your head. You look so beautiful this way – unaware, unknowing, and focused in nothing but the future ahead of you that you don’t bother yourself with his past.

Perhaps…it was comforting, after all.

He’d rather have you worry over your own studies than worry about him. Satoru can’t stomach the idea of you – his precious angel – being involved in his own shit, possibly get caught between the crossfire. It pains him to say it, but he doesn’t want you getting too close for comfort.

So he stays there by your side, simply because it would expel all ideas of you wanting to be beside him. He’ll be right where you’re safe, and the sigh that leaves your lips when he moves you to your bed, fitting in his long, lanky bed on your cramped mattress an immense struggle. As if feeling that you’re finally home, you snuggle closer to his chest, murmuring sweet nothings that tug at his heartstrings.

Satoru rubs circles at your back, staring so hard at the chipped paint on your wall that he’s sure he’s got it burned in his memory.

Now that he thinks about it, he should’ve been satisfied with that. He should’ve held back in his desire to have more of you. He should’ve just tucked you in and left, but he was never really in control of himself. Before he knew it, he’s pulled in by you too much, encouraging him to move in with you under the lie it’s easier to keep an eye on you.

Had he just left you earlier…would things have been different then?

He’s asked himself this question too many times. Satoru always came to one conclusion. He loved you way too much that it consumed him, and soon the love he held for you slowly burned you inch by inch. The only way to save you was to pull away – but he wasn’t ready for that yet, not now – but he’s too scared, too deep in love that he ignores the warning signals and holds you close instead, finding comfort in the warmth of your arms.

Fuck. Satoru downs his second drink, glaring at everyone beneath his shades. Geto snickers beside him, sending side eyes to his boss every now and then just to check. Of course, Satoru’s not actually going to pass out, he was no lightweight, but he’d been uneasy every since that pretentious gold envelope landed on his desk.

One of the downsides of being a mafia leader meant you had to mingle with other clan shit, including him of all people. There were always new leaders popping out of nowhere, Satoru quote unquoting, criminals be spawning like maniacs.

For fourteen years – fourteen fucking years – his clan had been in bad blood with the Zen’ins. They were pretty new in the illegal side of business, starting off as a powerful name in the trade industry before they got interested in oil. One thing led to another, the family began to realize they could have so much more if they turned a blind eye to a law or to, soon shifting into illegal weaponry trade, human trafficking, then drug manufacturing.

These bastards had the audacity to insult the Gojo Clan when Satoru’s family dropped by to strike a contract out of curiosity to their goods, only to be turned down because they’re ‘barbaric’ and ‘informal.’

Satoru still remembers that humiliating moment of being escorted out by bodyguards, but he held his head high, vowing to show that bastard Zen’in guy that the Gojo’s were one of the powerhouses for a reason. He doesn’t even know where the elderly guy got his confidence from. Mafia business was not the same as their former expertise, yet they acted all high and mighty with their rules and standard of being sophisticated even in a life or death situation.

Gojo doesn’t know whether he should be happy or sad that the old man died, his son taking over just as soon as his father perished. He would’ve celebrated with a whiskey or two, except the new clan leader was quite adamant in cleaning up their name to prove he would not create the same mistake his father did.

The new leader threw a large cruise party, inviting pretty much everyone they were chummy with, and Satoru has never felt more out of place. He recognized a face or two, but he couldn’t really give a fuck. He hated events like this – it was all about establishing power and face.

Satoru groaned under his breath, swiping at another flute as a waiter passed by. He felt the bubbles fizzle down his throat, the slight burning sensation somewhat easing his nerves.

He leans back at the wall and checks his watch for what seemed like the hundredth time that night. It’s been two fucking hours since they arrived, and the host still hadn’t arrived. If they planned on being ‘fashionably late’ Satoru won’t hesitate to slice someone’s neck tonight. He hates his time being wasted the most, and his eyes slid over to his friend’s still posture, looking like he just saw a ghost.

“Suguru,” he sighs through his mouth, “Don’t be so tense. This is a formal event – no blood will be shed tonight.” Suguru had a weird skill of being able to read Satoru’s thoughts that he raised his hands in surrender, silently promising that he’s not going to kill anyone.

“You’re not sure of that.”

“I won’t lose my composure, if that’s what you’re worried about,” he rolls his eyes, not looking back as he effortlessly places the empty glass back to another waiter. Satoru stands next to his friend, sucking his teeth out of boredom. Suguru, on the other hand, is tenser than ever, his eyes locked onto something in the middle of the crowd that began to cheer.

Faintly, somewhere at the back of his mind, Satoru hears someone whistle in signal. A few seconds later, the fireworks are lit and decorate the night sky, bursts of gold and beauty accompanying the entrance of the woman who’s so effortlessly caught everyone’s eye tonight.

Satoru is rooted to his spot, taking off his glasses the same time the crowd parts. Then, his breath is knocked away from his body, his heart pumping so hard he actually struggled to breathe.

Because you’re there, smiling and waving at the crowd as if it’s second nature to you. Seven years of being apart from one another and Satoru is still bewitched each time he lays his eyes on you. You’re the same…from your face down to the angelic feeling you always carried, but at the same time, you’re different. Gone was his precious angel who shied away from too much attention, his precious angel who would’ve never worn such a bodacious ring embedded on her left ring finger. Your smile is more charismatic, confident, and even fierce compared to the small, private ones you always shared with him – he almost couldn’t recognize you.

As if feeling someone’s eyes on you, you spot him leaning languidly against the walls, those lips you used to kiss turned downwards.

Seven years ago, you would’ve kissed him until he smiles again, singing to your pouty and clingy boyfriend who never voiced out the reason of his troubles. Seven years ago, he would’ve carried you and swung you around, showering you with affection as he reminds you how lucky he is to have you.

But this was no longer the past – that much is clear from when he left you without another word.

Still, you smile at him, an empty one that showed nothing but concealed anger. He was sure though, so fucking sure, that for a split second, he saw you light up. That may have been seven years ago, but you loved each other to the point of insanity – surely you still held some sort of fondness of him.

Satoru takes long, self-assured stride towards you, his gaze never leaving yours with his hands tucked into his pockets. There’s no telling what he’ll do, but in his mind, it’s clear.

You still love him, he still loves you. He’ll do something about it. It doesn’t matter what, he just will. That was until a young man closer to your age with blond hair and pierced earrings, narrow feline eyes lined with eyeliner hobbles beside you, his weight supported by a cane that Satoru stops in his movements.

He’d recognize that face anywhere.

The youngest and perhaps most mischievous leader of them all, Naoya Zen’in. Albeit not as hard-headed as his father in comparison with his rather laid-back and welcoming nature, Satoru knows a monster when he sees it. It takes one to know one, after all, and despite the heir being crippled from a former accident, his intelligence and power was not to be overlooked through his appearance and coy smiles.

In fact, he might even be more dangerous than his old man, this theory only proven when his arms snake around your waist. The matching rings gleam from under the light, and you press yourself closer to him to whisper in his ear, your attention very much still on Satoru.

Satoru’s entire body burns.

“Still there, Sir?” Suguru asks, gripping his boss’ bicep to hold him back. Smart of him, Satoru exhales through his nose, unable to stop his glare from darting to your husband’s.

He’s heard of you, of him, of how his most annoying rival had a phenomenal trophy wife who looked harmless at first look, but was actually the brains of most of his operations. Satoru forgets how to breathe normally because he’s heard of you, and the rumors he’s gotten wind of about Naoya’s trophy wife are nothing less of how dedicated and perfect the two of you are.

Slapping Suguru’s arm away from him, Satoru grits his teeth. “Get me a drink.”

His precious angel was gone. No, this woman that stood before him…you were an entirely different entity, something darker, something along the lines that were more like him.

What exactly happened the day he left you?

taglist: @ladywaifuuwrites​ @savantsoulfinder​ @my-reality-is-in-my-head​ tagging the ones who asked for part 2, please let me know if you’d like to be added or removed!