#being a stubborn asshole is cool actually is. bizarre

[agnesandhilda]

watched a (pirated) mr. birchum episode out of curiosity and in it the asshole conservative protagonist has a homoerotic daydream about the other teacher who's a stand in for the ""woke left"" that he hates, which is the opener for the episode and is also never referred to again, gets his sleeve caught in a machine in his woodshop at work and spends days contemplating his life and regrets while he's trapped (or so he thinks). this montage includes how he met his current wife who he doesn't respect and who isn't honest with him (the b-plot expands on this), how his ex-partner left him after coming out as a lesbian and was repulsed after he tried to persuade her to stay with him, reasoning that her being queer meant they could just share a girlfriend now (that was not what it meant), and culminating in a marlboro man-esque image of commercialized rugged usamerican masculinity telling him to chew his own arm off to escape, before one of his students comes along and frees him by just cutting off his sleeve. all that and he thought to chew his own arm off before he considered just tearing his sleeve. and it's all played as a comedy. fever dream episode

[crowscallthecrows]

Spoilers for all of the Public School Arc

Rewatching it again (cause what else do I do) and found some things I thought were worth discussing cause maybe I'm just slow and need an outside perspective:

So sebastian revealed that undertaker was the one that orchestrated everything as the headmaster from the time Redmond called him up, as payment for using their services. I'm assuming that undertaker was the one that made the order to send Derrick to purple house (unless he just sat back and let prefects deal with the school image themselves). But why the heck was that order made in the first place?? It just seemed like such a random fact that was constantly reiterated through the arc

I'm assuming again that it was because purple house calls way less attention from students (judging from the outward homeless appearance of the house itself and stoning other students away💀) and from outsiders (like how Redmond and red house in general is always being surrounded by women) therefore giving them way more time before other students realize that hey, we haven't actually seen those 5 students in a while.

And the way your telling me the teachers didn't say JACK about multiple students being missing in class for months at a time?? Even sebastian mentions this, though it's only about Derrick. Either the staff really hates derrick and his gang cause they knew they were assholes or just didn't care or notice (Edit: i realized mcmillian mentioned that it was common for purple house people to drop out. I'm assuming that's just what the staff thought).Which says a lot about the school the prefects were so stubborn on protecting 💀

I present to you another reason that's plausible: an excuse for derrick to step down as fag so Redmond could find a replacement. Can't have a dead body serve you tea. Though that doesn't explain sending the other boys there as well.

I was SO convinced that the burning of purple house would have something to do with derrick's body being hidden somewhere there when I first saw it.

It was a cool scene and all but the hell was violet freaking out for?? Stopping his other houses to stop his house from....burning seems a little dramatic for it just to mean nothing in the end.

Sure you can say it was the rivalry between the houses and all that, but unlike cheslock (who despite everything he says, seems to be pretty chummy with ol edward there) who actively does things that show he has at least a LITTLE problem with other houses (mentioning the rock throwing twice in a post), violet doesn't seem to...have that much of a problem with them. He doesn't strike me as a person who wastes his energy on hating needlessly.

My point is if he can commit murder with one student from each house, there should be no reason for him to be so mad that they want to help him. Which is why I thought he was hiding something.

Only for it to mean NOTHING IN THE END the fuck???

What exactly were the p4 planning on doing if undertaker was successful in making derrick and the others functioning members of society? Sending them back home? With no explanation on the MASSIVE scars going round their head?

How the hell were they gonna deal with that. Give them to Maurice for lessons on concealer?

And I'm correct me if I'm wrong but don't bizarre dolls have a really bad smell to them?? Why doesn't agares have one

Answering my own question, I guess this just sums up to poor planning on Redmond's part, since he's never seen a bizarre doll for himself before.

Am I being dumb?? Are these plot holes or are there actual reasons for these decisions. Maybe Yana was just filling up pages with random events to help lead up to the midnight tea party?

[wylanvnneck]

Hi hi! Congratulations! Can I ask for a Jurdan shot with the prompt in miscellaneous, *kiss post break up*? Thank you 💖

Miscellaneous Prompt #4:  *A kiss post break-up that neither was expecting but both needed* (action prompt)

Fandom: TFOTA

Ship: Jurdan

Masterlist | Prompt List

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Jude relished the burning sensation in her thighs as she completed her third round of the massive fountain at the center of the park. The early morning air was cool and the sunshine was just starting to heat up the place, creating the perfect setting for her usual morning jog. This particular spot was practically deserted, the only sound to be heard was the chirping of the birds and the light rustle of the trees and this type of peace was precisely what she needed before yet another tough day at work where she’d have to deal with her asshole colleagues. Well, just the one colleague. Cardan Effin’ Greenbriar.

The thought of his smug face and ludicrous cheekbones was enough to make her quicken her pace, a bead of sweat making its way down the side of her flushed face. Thoughts of his betrayal flood her mind and she wonders how she could ever have thought of him as roguishly charming. The man was a scoundrel, a blackguard. He was also not worth thinking about. She pushes the image of his floppy black locks and dark eyes away from her mind and runs even faster, leaving all her problems behind. This moment is cathartic, it was escaping all her turmoil, it was freedom and she relishes it.

Suddenly, she picks up on the sound of a twig snapping nearby. Out of the corner of her eye she spots a figure moving behind her, walking slowly and close to the trees lining the pathway, as if they didn’t wish to be seen. Her eyebrows furrow in confusion and her mind whirs, defensive martial art positions running through her head. From a young age her father had instilled in her the dangers of being out alone in deserted spots and the importance of always watching her back and she’s now on high alert as the figure behind her seems to be trying to move even further into the trees, still only a few feet behind her.

Thinking fast, she turns at the next corner and ducks behind a thick tree to the side, crouching her body behind it. The wood is scratchy under her sweaty palms and her heartbeat is racing at a mile a minute, the tension cutting through her body like a sword. Her surroundings seem sharper, more vibrant in her anxiety and soon enough she hears the light footfalls of someone approaching the turn. Seconds later, the figure is almost right in front of her, stopping when he realises that she’s no longer on the path. Finally she manages to get a good look at him and when she does she can’t help but let out a shocked gasp.

“Jude?” Standing right there in front of her with a bemused expression is Cardan Greenbriar, her colleague and ex-fling. She refused to think of him as anything else. “What on Earth are you doing?”

“What am I doing? You’re the one who’s been following me like some perverted creep.” Stretching herself back to her full height she steps away from the tree and onto the path to face him, her eyes narrowing and her blood pounding. How dare he act as if she were the one acting bizarrely.

“I-” The tips of his ears turn red and his hands wring together, “That’s fair I suppose. I was just umm…”

“Yes?” His blundering manner is uncharacteristic and confusing. Usually, he was the most overly confident bastard out there. Cardan Greenbriar was the suave type of guy who always knew exactly what to say and when, a talent that made him extremely useful as Head of Sales for Elfhame Enterprises, the company owned by his father Eldred Greenbriar, where they both worked.

“I simply wanted to talk to you alone for a bit but I figured that you’d avoid me at work and avoid any calls and texts from me too so I thought I’d come meet you at the park on your daily jog instead.” The words come out in a fast-paced stream, nearly unintelligible, his cheeks now red as well.

“Let me get this straight, you wanted to talk to me alone so you decided to stalk me at the park on my morning run and nearly give me a panic attack in the process?” She almost can’t believe her ears.

“When you put it like that it sounds wrong!” He huffs.

“How exactly am I supposed to put it, Cardan, that’s exactly what you did!”

“Alright so I may have lost my nerve and decided to trail you for a bit before approaching you. I realise now that that was a dumb idea.”

She resists the age to facepalm. “You think?”

“Look can’t we just put this all behind us?”

She lets out a long-suffering sigh whilst bringing her hands up to lightly massage at her now throbbing temples. “Okay, you said you wanted to talk? About what?”

The entire time that they'd been talking his stare had been trained somewhere near her chin, but now he raises his gaze to directly meet hers. “About us.”

“There is no us.” He’d made certain of that.

He takes a step forward, eyes blazing and she takes a larger step backwards, determined to keep her distance.

“Jude, you have to give me a chance to explain, you owe me that at least.”

“I don’t owe you anything.”

There was no possible explanation that he could give for what he’d done. They hadn't always been at loggerheads, her and Cardan. At least, they hadn’t been for some time until the last week. When Jude had first joined the company last year, she’d despised the overly arrogant son of Eldred Greenbriar, thinking of him as the rich, self-entitled jerk that she was forced to work with.

Then a couple months in, he managed to persuade her to go on a date with him, one date and then if she didn’t want to agree to another he’d get the message and move on. So she’d gone, expecting to hate every minute of it, except that she hadn’t. They’d actually gotten along surprisingly well, he’d taken her to a chill little Diner, not the over-the-top fancy restaurant that she thought he’d pick and he’d opened the car door for her like a gentleman. They had chatted for hours about their multitude of shared interests and drank Carlton beer and drunkenly waltzed together along the floor and it was perfect and wonderful and crazy.

After that they became an item, they would share heated interludes by the otherwise deserted office printing machine in true cliché Office Romance fashion and they’d even kissed under the mistletoe at the office Christmas party and things were going great, until one day, Jude overheard a conversation between him and his brother, Balekin Greenbriar, Eldred’s right hand man and future heir of the company.

She hadn’t meant to eavesdrop, she was only coming into Balekin’s office to hand over a file when she’d recognised Cardan’s voice saying her name. She would never forget the words that she had heard him say. ‘She’s a distraction...only a pointless fling....thought it would be fun to get under her skin....you know I like a challenge’.

The memory of those words alone are enough to bring back the hurt that had ripped through her when she had stood motionless on the other side of Balekin’s door, desperate to get away but trapped by her own denial and desire for self destruction.

Now she watches as he agitatedly ruffles his unruly black locks in front of her. “I swear to you, what you heard me say to Balekin, I didn’t mean a word of it.”

“Then why would you say it?” She’s torn between turning tail and leaving him there, turning her back on him for good or staying and waiting for his explanation, waiting to hear his reasons, why he’d done this to her, to them.

“You don’t know my brother, Jude.” His voice, his expression, his everything is bleak and open and vulnerable, begging for understanding. “He takes pleasure in destroying the things I love. It’s a game to him, one he’s been playing all my life, taking away what stops me from being miserable, and I couldn’t let him do that with you.

“Not with you,” he repeats, stronger. “You’re too important. So I knew I had to convince him that you meant nothing to me.”

Everything about his demeanour suggests sincerity and it definitely seems like he’s telling the truth and she wants to believe him, to trust him, she really does.

But she’s been hurt before and she doesn’t think she could chance being so again.

“I can’t trust you.”

“Yes, you can. You can choose to.” He steps forward now, close, so close, unrelenting.

She rises to the occasion and raises her face to meet his, a scant inch between them. “No, I can’t. I won’t.”

It’s a standoff now, neither willing to back down. The sun has made it’s way much higher in the sky and the yellow sunlight is beating down on them, the heat adding to the fire that has ignited between them.

“Stop being so stubborn, dammit,” he bites out, frustrated.

“Make me,” she sneers.

She doesn’t know how it happened, nor how she didn’t see it coming, but in the very next second Cardan’s lips are on hers, moving furiously and his arms are on her waist, holding her against him in an almost punishing grip.

It appears that he hadn’t quite seen it coming either because he pulls away from her before she has time to process more than a tingle running up her arms, his dark eyes wide and pupils dilated. They’re both breathing fast now, so close that they share breaths. They stare for a moment.

Then, with lightning speed she throws caution to the winds and wraps her arm around his neck, crashing her lips to his once more and this time she registers that his lips are soft under hers and he tastes like hot chocolate and breath mint and it feels glorious. It’s only been a little more than a week since they’d last kissed, but it felt like an eternity.

Minutes, hours, or days later they break apart, gasping for air and clutching at each other, neither one willing to relinquish their grip. Cardan rests his forehead on hers and looks at her with a startling amount of adoration and she knows right then and there that, scary as the thought is, she would forgive him anything, including this.

“Give me another chance?” He asks, pleading.

“Yes,” she breathes before reaching up to lose herself in kisses once more.

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I’m not entirely happy with this one tbh, but anyways here you go @franktastic-fangirl, thank you for sending in the prompt and for the congrats!🌻

Tagging my taglist (although I’m not entirely sure that I want y’all to read this, lol)- @cupcakesandkittens ​, @aelinfeyreeleven945tbln ​, @thewickedkings ​ and @kittkatandbooboo ​💕

Please let me know if you’d like to be added to or taken off of my TFOTA taglist :)

[cynthiaandsamus]

Custom Toonami Block Week 79 Rundown

Code Geass: Lelouch is establishing the official United States of Fuck Imperialism which is like the UN but actually does stuff, plus he has to deal with the fact that CC’s lost her memory and is acting like a demure slave girl harem choice from a VN. Charles is still trapped in the Human Instrumentality Shadow Realm so everyone figures this is a great time to unify everyone against Britannia. Kallen beats the shit out of Suzaku for being a dick to her all this time and the Knight of Ten is making his rounds because they realize they forgot to give him any buildup and he’s going to be a miniboss later so they have to cram all his being a dick personality into like five minutes while all the Knights of the Round assemble to prepare for an attack on Japan once the National Federation is formed. Llyod and Cecile for some reason enhanced the Guren for Suzaku even though he’s clearly more used to the Lancelot but apparently they enhanced it too much and made it a death machine like the Talgeese in Gundam Wing so Suzaku has to stick with the Lancelot. Looks like the Guren will have to sit and collect dust unless a certain pilot is rescued and then immediately has a convenient upgrade. Amazingly all the countries go along with everything Zero says and give up their militaries and have the Black Knights be the official military of the Federation. I don’t know how that works given that the Black Knights have been struggling to fight off one nation’s military idk how it’s supposed to substitute for a dozen nations’ military but I guess they conscript support and troops from the other nations or something. Charles comes back on the tv after the Federation is formed and is all “Awww what a cute little UN you have, fuck off bro.” which you’d think this’d be the perfect time for him to just out Lelouch as Zero and wreck the Black Knights’ morale but he doesn’t for some reason and they’re just gonna fight. Lelouch is freaking out and knows that having everyone want to murder the Britannian royal family includes Nunally so he calls Suzaku who just straight up goes “Bro cut the crap are you Zero or not?” and after so much plotting and scheming Lelouch just comes right out with it. Suzaki agrees to protect Nunally as long as Lelouch meets him alone at the Kururugi Shrine where this all began.

Inuyasha: This is another one of those Modern Day filler episodes which are always fun. There’s just something about Inuyasha running around in modern Japan being Spider-Man and saving people and catching bank robbers on the way to deliver Kagome’s lunch that’s so thoroughly entertaining. Basically Inuyasha spends this whole episode jittery that everyone’s so chill and ready to relax after Naraku just got away and is probably an inch from death but after a big adventure in the modern era where Kagome is as usual unprepared for her test, he ends up passing out on the bed after insisting a little battle with Naraku wouldn’t exhaust him. It’s a really cute little episode to let everyone bide some time and reflect on the past arc now that we’re starting a new wave of filler before we get to the Band of Seven and Mt. Hakurei stuff.

Yu Yu Hakusho: The first match of the tournament is about to begin and Botan, Shizuru, and Keiko come in with Koenma who is sick of baby jokes and puts on his bishonen disguise to impress everyone. There’s some neat lore about how they gave Koenma the guest team every year to bribe him into not shutting down the tournament without giving him anything of value and how the bloody show of the Dark Tournament pacifies the demons so they kill fewer humans, so that’s cool. Since Yusuke is still passed out, Kuwabara is de facto Captain and decides on simple one on one matches while the other team Captain just kinda roasts an eight of the crowd to see if it’ll wake Yusuke up. Kuwabara’s in the first match versus Prototype Killua, complete with afterimages and yo-yo tricks. They size each other up for a while and Kuwabara shrugs off getting his fucking neck broken surprisingly well while they go back and forth with “Well I can track YOU better” for a while. Togashi really loves his yo-yos of death so those have Kuwabara on the ropes and turn him into a fucking kite ready to slam back down into the arena, so yeah, Kuwabara’s having a rough time of it.

Fate Zero: Waver’s been having strange dreams about Iskandar, and not the ones people usually have about him. So he goes to get a basic history lesson on the historical figure that’s been chilling on his couch for a few weeks and spending all his money on xbox live arcade. They also go through all the ridiculously obvious historical inaccuracies and Iskandar’s just like “idk bro, I’m here so the book must be wrong” which is hilarious because Fate also does this with more modern historical figures that we have pictures of and shit so they basically sit there saying all historians have no idea what they’re talking about and gaslighting the field of history as a whole. On the way back Waver’s upset that Iskandar’s so awesome that it basically takes any effort on his part to win and it won’t be an actual achievement despite the fact that they’ve taken out like… one servant, MAYBE, and most of the other historical figures are equally over the top. But still Iskandar says that if your aspirations are big enough it doesn’t matter how big or small you are, everyone’s tiny in the grand scheme of things and clawing at greatness you can’t truly perceive is what matters. Also Caster and his boy have found the wreck they made of their workshop of dead bodies and are kinda fucked up about it but also ready to fuck up more people because God sucks or some shit. So Caster summons a Bloodborne monster which you think more people would notice and mention during Shirou’s time, like nobody in UBW ever said “Hey remember like seven years ago when a giant Bloodborne monster appeared in the river?” so I’m guessing there’s some kind of perception blocking going on. But yeah everyone’s gonna jump on the Bloodborne Monster next time for the season premiere.  

Konosuba: So we pick up where we left off and Kazuma is working off his debt by… killing more toads. Wow this world really is like a video game, we get the same five enemies over and over again. However they’re fucked without Darkness throwing herself into monster orifices looking for a good time so Yunyun has to save them. We already met Yunyun in the OVA so it’s kinda weird to be re-introduced to her here in basically the same way but their relationship is basically like Gai and Kakashi if they only did the lame dorky challenges Kakashi suggested when he’s too lazy to think of a good one. Also there’s a cat now, I don’t think that really comes to anything, just a scene of Megumin going “we have a cat now” and everyone’s like “kay”. Kazuma and Megumin play Naked Chicken to see who can get more naked before the other backs down and end up taking a bath together because they’re both stubborn assholes. Also we get a quick snippet of Yunyun and Megumin’s backstories which you can basically make Yunyun’s the swing scene from Naruto (idk why Yunyun is bring out the Naruto references in me today) and Megumin is stealing bread like Les Miserables in increasingly bizarre and disgusting ways because she’s ridiculously poor or some shit.

Sailor Moon Crystal: So turns out that Usagi and Mamoru BOTH had their shots with the ‘fucks everything up’ sword with a pocketwatch and… the discarded gems of the four knights? Idk how that works given they were humans and also dead but what baffles me more is that both Usagi and Mamoru very obviously did not get hit by the sword but decided to fall down dead and not move for a couple minutes despite their shots very much being blocked and there being no blood. Anyway Queen Metalia has the crystal, bullshit is happening, 1000 years of darkness, you’ve seen Xiaolin Showdown, you know the drill. The remaining four Guardians get a cute little flashback of Usagi saying what she likes about them and then they give up their lives to revive her inside the dark energy blob of Queen Metalia and crystals and lights and shit happens and swords and wands are pulled out of nowhere and you know how a final boss goes, they beat it with the power of believing in themselves and shit like that. Also apparently the only difference between sealing Metalia away and killing her is hitting the giant bullseye on her forehead so yeah, hopefully she’s down for good this time. I don’t want to complain because this show was genre-defining but it’s hard to find things to say about something so generic and milktoast, it’s the Seinfeld problem where there’s been so many more interesting iterations that it’s just kinda “get on with it already” at this point. The only real markedly noticeable thing about it is how plainly and unashamedly it is about being a power fantasy for teen girls, and there’s something to that, harmless power fantasies can be fun but it just feels like the physical mechanics of this kind of progression being “She feels this shit REALLY HARD” is less exciting than some of the alternatives

Durarara!!: It’s the big Masaomi backstory episode and we get the whole deal of how he formed the Yellow Scarves and got into a relationship with Saki because Izaya wanted to orechestrate a gang war because that’s what Izaya does all day is orchestrate gang wars. It’s kind of amazing how many kids in this show are like “I don’t know how it happened but one thing led to another and suddenly I was at the head of one of the largest gangs in the city” like they kinda really yadda yadda over how that actually happens. But anyway Saki gets hurt in the gang war and Kadota’s gang has to save her because Masaomi’s adrenaline wears off at the last second and he can’t try and rush in and save her. I mean Dota’s van got there first anyway so how much he’d have been able to help would be doubtful but he feels bad about not even being able to try and Izaya says that fear and failure of his past will dominate his future actions which is exactly what he’s doing by letting his paranoia and frustration lead him to a war on the Saika army. Dota-chin tells him to face up to it and stop running or live with the shame of lying to Saki but Masomi can’t do that and his shame and determination to reverse the situation leads everyone into chaos as Anri discovers his secret.

[smallcowplant]

[ P A R T  T W O ]

my favorite thing is monsters (book one) by emil ferris 🧟‍♀️🔍🧛‍♀️

quick synopsis: adult (coming-of-age story from the perspective of a young girl, but definitely targeted at an older audience)/graphic novel. set in late 60′s chicago, the fictional graphic diary of ten year old karen reyes recounts her experiences as she tries to solve the murder of her beautiful and enigmatic upstairs neighbor, a holocaust survivor.

page count: 416

rating:★★★ (this is a hard rating for me...think 3.7-3.9....oscillating to a 4....4.2....I don’t know, man)

review: I keep doing this fun and cool thing where I buy a book without realizing it’s the first in an (unfinished) series, and then end up being cast woefully adrift by reality. that’s what I did with this one. purely based on the artwork alone, I can tell you that this book is a treat for the eyes. a lot is going on here, and there’s something so engrossing about being swept up into the chaotic pen strokes and colors. the story is an interesting one, and not entirely what you expect. the characters are all distinct and layered---really riveting people who feel near-painfully real. as the first book in a two (?) book series, it leaves off with the central (and now additional) mysteries unsolved---which leaves the reading experience feeling unfinished and kind of disjointed. I’m stuck in a bit of a confusing mid-zone with this one, where I truly....well, I can't say I enjoyed it, since this story is so much more than that? I was...fascinated? enveloped? I’ll be reading the next one, definitely.

one of us is lying by karen m. mcmanus 🥜🚓📱

quick synopsis: young adult/contemporary mystery/suspense. five students walk into detention. only four make it out alive. who did it...and who is lying?

page count: 361

rating:★★★ (firm 3.7)

review: the breakfast club....but with murder? if you’re down for that, you’ll enjoy this book! it certainly kept my attention. and MAN was this a suspenseful and super stressful read. (if you need a book that’ll make you go “wow, I’m glad I’m not in high school anymore”, this is it lol!) there’s a bunch of really interesting character studies going on in this one, and it definitely lends to a tense and involving read. the only reason the rating isn’t any higher is just that certain elements of it didn’t work...entirely...for me. that doesn’t mean that they were bad...just not what I...wanted? there’s two more books in this series, and while I’m not anxious to get my hands on them, I’m fairly sure I would read them!

murder at morrington hall: a stella and lyndy mystery by clara mckenna 🐎🍵💏

quick synopsis: adult/historical mystery. 1905. stella kendrick, a lively and confident american heiress, is tricked into an arranged marriage by her coldly ambitious father. her groom-to-be is viscount “lyndy” lyndhurst, who is both roughish and financially strapped. despite this rough beginning, they find themselves oddly drawn to each other. could they actually be a good match? however, all courtship is set aside when the pair discover the vicar who was  to marry them----dead in the library. now they must work together to solve the crime and find the culprit.

page count: 304

rating: ★★

review: ugh, it pains me to say, as I thought I was signing myself up for a fun turn-of-the-century murder mystery/romance...but this was just...meh. a meh story. I feel like it had potential to be an enjoyable, soapy romp with a dash of sensuality...but it was none of those things? (basically, I wanted a self-indulgent and delicious slice of chocolate cake...but I ended up with a week-old raisin muffin.) it didn't help that I had some issues with certain things the writer included. in particular, I REALLY didn’t like the equating of fat = mean/ugly and the repeated use of the word “bulbous” to describe certain characters noses----I had to do a quick google search to see what the hell the author was talking about. still not sure if she was trying to imply that the characters had rhinophyma/rosacea or just that they had bigger, “ugly” noses, but neither is good lmao. whenever you put a “plain/regular-degular person” with a big nose up against your array of stock White People™ characters with thin noses and angular faces, AND make those “plain” characters play the “wow, I’m so ugly but these characters are so pretty oh woe is me” bullshit in their inner monologue, I’m dipping. I’ve collected my paycheck, clocked out, left the building. (your story is already about a bunch of rich, straight, white people in 1905...I’m already skeptical, don’t test me. jk, but also not.) I’m fairly sure this would have caused a decent amount of people to DNF this book, but I’m a stubborn little bitch, and if I paid actual money for the hardcover copy at goddamn Barnes and Noble, I’m reading it. this is all to say that....if I’m being thrown out of enjoying your soapy historical murder mystery to gripe about random shit, there’s a problem. other than that? carpet was described a lot, the twist was decent, the romance was okay (no smut---or anything even vaguely close to romantic/sexual tension---and the kisses were not described at all, so I have no clue if either of them do more than press their lips together while admiring each others pale necks, but whatever), and the setting was the most interesting thing about this book (a crumbling english estate in the countryside?? sign me tf up). I won’t be reading anything more in this series, but that cover is pretty cool isn’t it? (I don’t know that the vase had anything to do with the story I read, but it does look really neat.) sidenote: hate to be a smarmy asshole, as I know full well how much work goes into writing, and I’m in no way trying to shame the author...this book just didn’t do it for me.

wilder girls by rory power 🌳🦷🥀

quick synopsis: young adult/horror/mystery. on an isolated island off the coast of maine, raxter school for girls is under quarantine. a mysterious disease has wracked the island, leaving teachers dead, students twisted and changed, and the woods that surround it dangerous and wild. while the disease consumes the island, the girls wait---for help, for the cure that was promised to them. but when hetty’s best friend disappears, she must venture out of the safety of the school, past the gate that separates them from the woods---and what she finds will change everything.

page count: 363

rating: ★★★★★

review: powerful, blistering, and utterly terrifying. that’s what immediately comes to mind when thinking about this book. I read it in a breakneck pace, devouring the whole thing in a feverish five? hour haze. once it was over, I sat bleary-eyed, the air around me feeling different than before, my hands tense and my stomach jumping. “you were a good one.” I said softly, kissing the spine. so yeah, it’s good. it’s very good. heartbreaking and awful and shockingly beautiful. this one hurts. I felt this one in my bones, in my soul. read it.

lovely war by julie berry 🌷💥💞

quick synopsis: young adult (but the youngest character is 18...so I think this could comfortably slot into adult)/historical (with a touch of fantasy). the intersecting stories of hazel, james, aubrey, and colette: a classical pianist from london, a british would-be-architect-turned-soldier, a harlem-born ragtime genius in the u.s. army, and a belgian orphan with a gorgeous voice and a devastating past----told by the goddess aphrodite, who must spin the tale or face judgment on mount olympus.

page count: 468

rating: ★★★★★

review: do you know how many times I CRIED while reading this book? because I certainly don’t! I lost track, as there are simply too many painful and beautiful things contained in this book. heart-wrenching, sumptuous and intoxicating, vivid in the best and worst ways, sharp and soft at the same time. I met my boyfriend while he was still active-duty military, so the wartime/seperation themes hit me very personally....but even without that, this book is excellent. expertly weaving together mythology and history in one gripping piece of art, it left me with a wistful smile on my face and a faint ache in my heart. it’s good. very good.

we have always lived in the castle by shirley jackson 🏡💀🐱

quick synopsis: young adult? adult? who knows!/mystery/horror. mary katherine blackwood is eighteen years old and lives with her sister constance. she has often thought that with any luck at all she would have been born a werewolf, because the two middle fingers on both of her hands are the same length, but she has had to be content with what she has. she dislikes washing herself, and dogs, and noise. she likes her sister constance, and richard plantagenet, and amanita phalloides, the death-cup mushroom. everyone else in her family is dead.

page count: 146

rating: ★★★★ (4.5/4.6!)

review: delightfully creepy and utterly odd, with a full cast of extremely unlikable characters and one of the strangest protagonists I’ve ever read. at NO TIME did I have any idea where the story was going, which lead to an completely bizarre (but fun!) reading experience. twilight-zonian/gothic...but better. very eager to read more of shirley jackson’s catalogue, because that lady sure knew how to weave a tale. very glad I read this one.

sadie by courtney summers 📻👥🎙

quick synopsis: young adult (mc is nineteen, and imo I feel like this slides into adult tbh)/contemporary/true crime. told from the alternating perspectives of nineteen-year-old sadie, who runs away from home to find her younger sister’s killer, and a true crime podcast exploring sadie’s disappearance.

page count: 308

rating: ★★★ 

review: sad, awful, raw. that’s this book, simultaneously bright red and angry and deep blue, sadness upon sadness. this book reminds me of every true crime documentary I’ve ever watched---how it wraps itself up in a depressingly soft way, all the emptiness left behind and everything forever-changed. gives me the same icky voyeuristic feeling consuming any true crime content always leaves with me---this peculiar feeling of peering in to others heartbreak, of their horrors. this is a hard book. it’s difficult and not easy to stomach---and it never lets up. know that before you go in. what you may expect/want is NOT what you’ll get. and that’s the trueness of this book. I have my own personal feelings regarding the story, thus the three star rating, but that’s on ME. this book is incredibly well-written and insanely gripping. I finished it the same night I started reading it. if you want a gritty, intense read set in the very bleak reality of our world, this is your book.

FEBRUARY

BOOKS READ: 14

PAGES READ: 4225

# OF 2020 BOOKS READ SO FAR: 17/50

in reflection: my goal for this month was to read ten books, and I did that ...plus four more! so I’m pretty proud of myself, lol! there were a lot of stellar reads this month, and I had so much fun discovering them all! definitely a TON of new favorites to add to my bookshelf! :^)

disclaimer: all fourteen of the books I read this month include/focus on potentially triggering content, although they do fluctuate on the scale of intensity and subject matter. my wrap-up reviews do not contain spoilers/a comprehensive list of potential triggers. I urge everyone to do their own research regarding the content of these books if you’re interested in reading them, and I’m always available for questions. my reviews are just that, reviews, and books that work for me may not work for you (and vice versa).

[tysonrunningfox]

🔥 rtte 🔥

I was just ranting about rtte missing out on a major chance for comedy this morning, and I’ve been wanting to make a post about it anyway, so I’ll do it here: 

This is not a commentary on quality or whether rtte should exist or whether it’s canon.  This is an emphatic insistence that rtte made a big mistake by not just letting Snotlout and Astrid date for like half a season.  

I know, I know, I’m the snotstrid shipper and I’m just being obnoxious with it but hear me out: it would have fixed the whole weird rush of Hiccstrid getting together at the end of season 4 and also, been hilarious and also just dealt with the weird sexual tension that made them hang all over each other in The Longest Day.  

I will explain under a cut, because I have so many adamant feelings about this: 

So The Longest Day happened, and it wasn’t out of the blue (fight me they’re so ridiculous that season) and Astrid is someone who commits once she has weird daytime midnight sex with kisses someone.  And they’ve been spending a lot of time together at the edge and ok, let’s try it, it’s more solid character building than the rest of the show anyway, so just join me on this concept journey.  

One, there’s the hilarious concept of everyone learning that Snotstrid is dating.  There’s a lot of blank stares, a lot of deep confusion at the concept that Snotstrid is capable of holding hands.  Hiccup is like “I kind of thought Astrid and I were dating”, Heather is like “maybe you should have had an actual conversation with your supposed girlfriend about being your girlfriend before she went clinically insane and started dating Snotlout”.  There’s just…so many layers of comedy gold there.  

Two, the crew has to go back to Berk for some reason and Astrid isn’t embarrassed, ok, she’s not, but she really doesn’t want Stoick to know about this yet because she still wants him to respect her and she’s not sure where that stands if she’s not attached to Hiccup.  It involves shenanigans in which Snotlout has to keep the secret that he’s dating Astrid, probably as his dad is a dick and they’re pitted against each other in all the old ways that feel weird now.  Hiccup is probably the one who blurts it out in the end and Stoick is like “come on how’d you mess that one up” and Hiccup is like “apparently there’s a conversation involved and I didn’t have that, but she seems happy and I’m happy for her” because Actual Support, kthx.  

Three, battle tactics change, Viggo is like “this is not how I saw this going” but it’s hard for the riders to maintain formation when the 2nd and 3rd in command are super ride or die for each other all of a sudden.  Discussions about leadership that allow Snotlout to maintain the relative level of composure and grains of maturity that he gained in previous seasons.  

Four, I just thought of this this morning, but Snotlout starts winning at life for like the first time ever.  Any argument that crosses his path can be answered with “yeah, well I’m dating Astrid”.  Yes, it even works on Astrid, because Gods, who trusts her judgement right now, she’s dating Snotlout, she’s probably not right.  

Then, let it fall apart.  Let them have fun and come to terms with the fact that the experience bettered them in unique ways.  Like Astrid made her own decision instead of waiting around (like she does for everything but Hiccup but I Digress), but families are complicated and maybe she just doesnt’ see much of a future to it.  Like Spitelout as a father in law?  That’s a legitimate complaint.  Her parents probably aren’t cool with it and that matters.  For Snotlout, maybe Astrid’s approval was always sort of emblematic and he felt like if he could just get it, he could prove something to the world.  And he did that and he’s still working on himself and it’s confusing.  

Like, here’s the part I couldn’t write because once those two stubborn assholes commit to each other, they’re solid, but again, sticking with the premise, it falls apart.  They break up.  They break up and they have to see each other all the time and then there’s the new hilarity over the fact that neither one of them knows how to fucking act now.  

Like is hitting still flirting?  Astrid doesn’t know, sometimes she dodges hitting him completely and sometimes she hits way too hard.  Snotlout doesn’t understand the concept of airing someone else’s dirty laundry and announces things he shouldn’t, he doesn’t know how to make up for it aside from embarrassing himself.  Astrid is still mad, but appreciates it.  Just…the whole shenanigans of learning to be friends again, instead of oddly escalating moments of sexual tension that made no sense because she was with Hiccup.  Definitely remove that “if you hadn’t shot down Toothless, I’d be marrying Snotlout and have a SICK golden axe” moment, because that made no sense.  

Also, Hiccup comforting Astrid after a breakup?  Hilarious.  He realized how much he still likes her, or maybe it’s a new like, he doesn’t really know but he was happy for her being happy and now he doesn’t want her to be sad.  But it’s weird.  Awkward shoulder pats and offers for a shoulder to cry on and she’s like “I”m not crying, I don’t cry” even as this is probably the first fundamental failure she’s ever dealt with in her life and she’s struggling.  Let him give her space and be delighted when she doesn’t take him up on it, because everyone else is still being weird.  

Like, what if instead of pretending that this bizarre and obvious connection between Snotlout and Astrid wasn’t there, they just had a little teenage fling and both grew as people and then got to maintain that growth and have it strengthen relationships around them?  Like, as it stands, it doesn’t make much sense that Snotlout had come so far in respecting Astrid and then he goes off thinking that the lesbian island is all in love with him.  But if he were newly dumped?  Yeah, he could be going through a “women suck” phase.  Astrid having to rescue her ex when he enraged a bunch of lesbians trying to get over her?  Interesting.  

It would have fixed so much, ok?  And been hilarious.  And no one is ever going to read this giant rtte meta in the year 2019 but I don’t care, it’s off my chest now.  

[desperate-entwives]

finifugal

vaguely based on ‘story of your life’ by ted chiang  starring: yet more bitter season one/two murphy!

Memori week day five: angst 

Murphy calls the visions dream-memories, because they’re as bizarre and alien and fucked up as dreams, but they feel familiar when they come to him. Slightly faded and worn along the edges or something. It first happens after he tries to hang Bellamy. He’s running away from camp so swiftly that he thinks he must be delirious. He can taste the blood and sweat in his mouth and behind him, Bellamy and Jasper watch his departure, likely dismissing him as a threat, dismissing him in general. He doesn’t know what to do with this crumpled up violence in his chest so he runs and runs and... And then the dream-memory emerges from the corner of his mind.

(He’s back on the Ark but it feels dusty. Empty. A woman stands next to him and he can tell from how she’s standing that she does this a lot. “John,” she says (who the fuck even calls him that), and he can read a million words into that one. She’s looking at stars, not the rotating marble of ground below. “How long would it take to get to one of them?” she asks. “A hell of a long time,” he says, dream-him, and their hands slide together and entwine.)   The memory ends and he’s aware of his surroundings again. He is running. He is running. (full story under cut)

finifugal  

Murphy calls the visions dream-memories, because they’re as bizarre and alien and fucked up as dreams, but they feel familiar when they come to him. Slightly faded and worn along the edges or something. It first happens after he tries to hang Bellamy. He’s running away from camp so swiftly that he thinks he must be delirious. He can taste the blood and sweat in his mouth and behind him, Bellamy and Jasper watch his departure, likely dismissing him as a threat, dismissing him in general. He doesn’t know what to do with this crumpled up violence in his chest so he runs and runs and... And then the dream-memory emerges from the corner of his mind.

(He’s back on the Ark but it feels dusty. Empty. A woman stands next to him and he can tell from how she’s standing that she does this a lot. “John,” she says (who the fuck even calls him that), and he can read a million words into that one. She’s looking at stars, not the rotating marble of ground below. “How long would it take to get to one of them?” she asks. “A hell of a long time,” he says, dream-him, and their hands slide together and entwine.)   The memory ends and he’s aware of his surroundings again. He is running. He is running. --- When the next dream-memory hits him, he is shivering in a cluster of trees, bleeding and alone (for now). He’ll be damned if the grounders catch him again, or if he crawls back to camp in seek of whatever benevolent execution Clarke has in store for him. (And then he sees it in his mind-- he’s tripping along the trees with that woman, who happens to be as quick as an arrow. She’s a grounder, he realizes now, noting the pattern etched onto her face and her easy, violent familiarity with her surroundings. He follows barely behind, their hands clasped again. Some sort of warm bullshit clouding his veins. “Shh,” she says and brings the both of them to a halt. And then, “Go now. As still as you can.” She kisses him on the mouth, as though to bolster him, and grins something sharp with her eyes, which have some cruelty in them but also laughter. Well. Then. Obediently, he curls up in the middle of a bare dirt path. Footsteps approach.) --- He doesn’t know what to make of the dream-memories. They flood him at the worst possible times and it’s like he’s losing whatever fragment of sanity he has left. He’s back at the fucking dropship and in front of him, Raven is bleeding. He is bleeding too. Are they are a point where causation doesn’t matter? Knowing his luck, probably not. He did this. A stirring of blame in his gut, nauseating and stubborn. He’s too weak to push it away. When it comes down to it, Murphy hates the messes people are inside. Psychologically, that is. The blood and guts are startling, but honest. All violence does is let that ugly soup spill out. Still. (Looking at Raven, he suddenly sees it or dreams it or remembers it: Raven, speaking to the woman from the other visions. The woman is on a table, some sort of indifferent steel medical bed. “They’re gone,” Raven hesitantly tells the woman, who is sitting up on the table and rubbing her arms with her hands. And in the dream, Murphy is brimming with rage, a more refined kind of rage than he’s used to, something focused on the hurt in the woman’s eyes. The vulnerability. She turns to him and touches his cheek shakily. The hand she uses is bizarre and beautiful and he presses it to his face, feeling his eyes well up, the feeling her warmth on his skin overwhelming.) --- As he tries to play nice with the assholes at Camp Jaha, he’s haunted by the memories that haven’t happened with this woman he doesn’t know and it stops being a weird annoyance, or a sign that he’s going off the deep end. It’s too much. It’s too present. He sees the curves of her face flame-lit, graced by shadows, and feels the ashes on his lips and hers. Bullshit, how soft he feels, and how intermittently soft and rough her skin is, searing the tips of his fingers. He remembers fucking on a pile of furs-- a feeling like a pulling in his chest, like something opening. He thinks of meeting her for the first time, her skin rough and warm in the desert, and feels with memory’s dimmed sensation the cool metal of her knife and betrayal. One night, he listens to a story she tells him, up in the quietness of space. She is restless, and he is hurting with a kind of helplessness, a trapped, aching feeling. “Emori,” he says, “it’ll be soon, okay? Just an extra year. Raven’s almost done, you know that.” She glances at him sharply and then quiets her energy and sits on his lap. They are on a bed, in a room on the Ark that is clearly theirs. His arms automatically curl around her, his fingers playing with the soft underside of her elbow. “Did I ever tell you about the month he locked us up?” she says. Her voice is rich with pain. Like a voice filled with blood and all that shit life has trapped deep inside of it and he wants to wrap his hands tight around the neck of whoever made her feel like this, the Murphy of the dream does and so does the Murphy of the now, who is sleepless at Camp Jaha, listening to the grounders call for Finn’s surrender. In his dream-memory, she is weeping. He has never held something so fucking gently in his entire life. --- He joins Jaha on his fool’s mission because running is what he excels at. He never excelled at anything in space except setting shit on fire, and that was probably all because there was nowhere to run. When his supercilious leader tells them to set up camp the first night, more memories flat his way. Roasting a rat over a fire with Emori. Watching her spacewalk with Raven, her face full of fascination with the slow, inane movements. Bickering with her in a cave, putting a barricade over his heart, tearing it down. One of the nights, as they approach the desert, he envisions being in a ship with her, a small one. For some reason Bellamy is there, and so is Raven, and Monty, and Harper, and another woman he doesn’t recognize. But Emori is next to him and she could be the only person there for all he cares. “Soon,” she says, the word rich with promise. She meets his eyes and the warmth in them mixes with a nervousness, and he knows he feels the same. “Yeah,” he says, kissing the top of her head. She smiles at him and the ship is descending now, and he feels a sudden twisting in his gut, like he already knows-- ---the landing is jagged and rough and he is screaming at Raven, at Monty, at fucking anyone, and his hand is tightly clasped around Emori’s still and where did the time go? so much time and no, he’s not letting go, absolutely not, and he pulls her out of the burning vessel as Harper and Raven pull out the others. They are on the ground now, they are on the ground, they’re here, they’re-- “Emori,” he says and the bite of air and smoke furls around him and goddammit no this does not get to happen, life doesn’t allow them to survive this far only to-- And he is saying, “Emori, we’re here, we’re here, just breathe. Come on, Emori, please, we’re…” and his words stop turning into words and everything is the body he’s holding, unmoving, unbreathing, small, bones as thin as paper-- And he wakes up in the desert, screaming into the ground. --- They’re approaching the border of the desert, the Dead Zone, as Jaha calls it. In the early morning, after getting cursed out by the rest of the travellers, Murphy paces along, his few possessions slung over his shoulder and his breath sporadic. The panic is still there, coursing through his blood, telling him to move, to outrun this, whatever it is. Because he doesn’t have to meet her. He doesn’t have to discover the softness, the whatever between moments. He doesn’t have to grow to actually give a shit about someone only to have them ripped away, reduced to a dying thing and then a death, more crap in a life filled to the brim with absolute crap. Because who gave life that fucking right? Murphy’s fate is his own. He could turn away from these memories or dreams or whatever the hell they are and whatever the hell they mean and run back toward Camp Jaha, run and run and run and never come back. (And then comes a cruel memory, a small one from the Ark: “I have nothing but shitty memories of this place.” So she kisses him gently on the cheek and says, “Let’s make some sweet ones.” The glint in her eyes could blind the stars.) --- In an hour, Murphy’s knees ache. He is shaking with rage at himself. Each step hurts more than the last but he keeps moving and he must be completely gone, there must be nothing in him that makes sense anymore because he doesn’t care about things making sense anymore. There’s only one thing he cares about.   Murphy’s travelling companions don’t pay his moods any mind, and he says nothing as he walks through the sand, step by fucking step, towards the seemingly abandoned cart. He has someone to meet.

[surreals-askmeme-space]

alien: isolation, 2014

quotes, some actions + some youtuber reaction quotes

replace [+name] with your muse’s name, replace [-name] with my muses name, replace [^name] with a random muse’s name, change pronouns if necessary, ladeda you get the drill.

—

“ i know why you’re working in the region that she went missing. you’re still looking, aren’t you? “

“ [-name], it’s certainly not ‘good’ and i very much doubt it’s ‘morning’ either. “

“ uh, have you seen [^name]? he’s probably been up for hours. “

“ well, i don’t really need as much sleep as the rest of you. “

“ hmm, hadn’t noticed. she’s a skilled executive though, should help us with any legal issues we might encounter. “

[“all personnel to the bridge. approaching sevastopol station.”] “ looks like we’re up. “ ( bold over speakers )

“ does everyone have their briefing documents? “

“ is that damage? “

“ it looks like damage. “

“ looks like the dry-dock bay is screwed. “

“ [STATIC]..waits, colonial marshal..[STATIC]..sevastopol station..[STATIC]..serious situation..[STATIC] “ ( over radio )

“ my contract doesn’t cover bloody space-walks.. “

“ [-name], [^name], HOLD ON! “

“ shit. “ ( context: fire comes out of something/something blows up )

“ the torrens..! i’m here! i’m right here! VERLAINE! god damn it! “

“ this whole damn place is falling apart.. “

“ i think i need this more than you do. “ ( taking a maintenance jack from a dead body )

“ stay. still. “ ( a gun is pointed at my muse’s head by your muse )

“ now, turn around. “ ( connected to previous quote )

“ yeah, there’s something on this station. something you wouldn’t believe. “

“ a killer! you get it?? “

“ what’s in it for me?! “

“ how do i know i can trust you? “

“ let’s go, sweetheart. seegson comms is in the systech spire. it’s quite a distance, but we can get to a transit through the freight area. “

“ was that you following me back there? “

“ hey, don’t move! “

“ they’re just some assholes, we don’t have time for this. “

“ i-i’m sorry, good luck. “

“ everyone’s running shit-scared, keeping to their own. safer that way. “

“ i’d appreciate it if you told me what the hell was going on. right now. “

“ listen, darlin’. when we get to the ship we can kick back, braid eachother’s hair and chat all you want. “ ( ooc note, ironic because axel has no hair at all )

“ yeah, when we get to my ship. i need to know what’s going on. right fucking now. “

“ i ain’t seen it, but it’s here. picking us off one by one. “

“ shit, we need to move! this way, get down! “

“ this is bullshit, man! we should be looking for a way off! “

“ then we shoot the crap out of them! now shut up, you’re making me nervous. “

“ i ain’t pulling your chain, darling. you want to go and say hello? it’s your funeral. those guns aren’t for show. “

“ everyone’s turning on eachother. the fear..it makes people crazy. “

“ you’ve been living here? “

“ i hate this place. “

“ [name], is this it? “ ( by a vent )

“ quietly! “

“ sevastopol not quite what you’re expecting, eh? “

“ [-name], behind you! “ ( someone’s behind my muse )

“ this is about survival! do you understand?! “

“ what have i got on me?? “ ( there’s a liquid dripping onto your muse’s arm from a vent above )

“ w-what the hell was that thing?! “ ( your muse witnessed someone dying to the xenomorph/the sevastopol drone )

“ an access tuner..she was trying to hack the elevator’s security. “

action: send 🕸 for your muse and my muse to get into an encounter with the xenomorph.

“ please take a seat. someome will be with you shortly. “ ( ooc note, honey no nobodys gonna be with me shortly everyones dead )

“ apollo has the situation in hand. your registration is almost complete. “

“ you are becoming hysterical. “

“ good day. “

action: send 🤖 for my muse’s reaction to being chased by a working joe android

“ [-name]! you’re alive, it’s [+name]! “

“ okay. [-name], listen to me, it’s not safe here. seegson’s got this place locked tight. their goddamn androids are killing people! “

“ and there’s something else here. a creature, it’s big and it’s lethal. “

“ it’s a lifeform, an unknown type, some sort of alien organism. it’s extremely dangerous, you need to... “

“ the radio is broken, i can’t contact verlaine. we’re on our own. “

[“ unauthorised communication. please wait to be attended by a member of seegson personnel.”] “ shit. “

action: send 👾 for my character’s reaction to your’s dying to a xenomorph attack. optionally, specify a way for your muse to die. ( impaled by it’s tail or a headbite )

“ [-name]..? is that [-name]..? “

“ ‘we’? do i look like i’m in any fit state? “

“ i need your help, and you need mine. you find the passcode for the service elevator, and then i’ll come down to the hospital with you, okay? “

“ damn you, [-name]! you knew that thing was here! “

“ of course. of course. a promise is a promise. i’m sorry for putting you through this. “

“ oh god. “ ( after seeing yet another person die )

“ shit, i think they’re dead. i think they’re fucking dead! check the camera feed! “

“ how can i help you? “

“ just keep the noise down, okay? “

“ identify yourself. “

“ is there anywhere safe left on the station? that creature’s running around and the seegson synthtics are less than friendly. “

“ someone’s shut everything off. “

“ maybe we’ll be safe here. for now, anyway. “

“ but you sure as hell found something else. what happened out there? “

“ let’s take it slow, i want to get to that beacon in one piece. “

“ don’t worry. if it’s a distress signal, they wouldn’t have lasted. which means we get the salvage rights to anything we find. “

“ check out those rock formations. bizarre. “

“ ain’t nothing natural about this place. “

“ hello? hello? can anyone hear me? “

“ yes, [-name]. me. you son of a bitch. you locked me in. you blew the lab into space and- “

“ i had no choice. no choice at all! you saw that thing! you saw what it could do! i had to get it off the station! by any means necessary. “

“ yeah. use me as bait. leave me to die. “

“ there’s that. and there’s the fact you’re a heartless bastard. i’m heading back to the bureau. we can discuss your methods there. [+name] out. “

“ he’s a ruthless son of a bitch. always has been. stubborn too. if he’d ever listened to me, things would never have gone this far. “

“ i’m sorry for fucking up with the lockdown earlier. “

“ sit tight. lock the fucking doors and don’t let anyone in. look after me. i’ll come back for you. “

“ in charge? in charge of what? a room of dead people?! this is fucked up! “

“ right. then i’ll have to find a way to talk to apollo directly. “

“ i don’t have time for this. “ ( ooc note, GO SAMUELS GO )

“ nothing. just more shit on this station fucking up. the usual. “

“ yes, far too dangerous. wish me luck. “

“ [-name], DON’T! “

“ you talk like i’ve had an actual life. i...thank you for that. “

“ you did that for me..? “

“ i wanted [-firstname] [-lastname] to have closure... “

“ turn off the electrics, take some deep breaths, squeeze...easy.. “

“ i am not coming up there to pull you out if you get stuck. “

“ huddling up to a live conduit is gonna hurt though, right? “

“ i’m going to catch you. “

“ come with me, please. “

“ it isn’t on the damn station! “

“ you’re from the company. tell them you don’t give a shit and to do what you say! “

action: send 😥 to see my muse’s reaction to having to crawl through a small vent

“ going dark on comms, [-name]. this isn’t good. “

“ waits really did a number on this place.. “

“ i will find you, you know. “

“ oh fuck! [^name] forced an overload...the ship’s going to tear itself apart! “

“ torrens. torrens, this is [+name] on the station. are you reading me, [-name]? “

“ oh god, [^name], oh no.. “

“ [-name], i’m heading up to the bridge now. “

“ this is [+name], last survivor of the nostromo, signing off. “

———

youtuber reaction time! some ytbers may have less quotes than others, shh

“ but..it’s not the alien that’s the most dangerous part, is it? or is it actually. “ - 8bitryan

“ i’m too stupid to press a button my dude. thank you. thank you for pressing a button for me. “ - 8bitryan

“ oh, we gotta wait for the agonisingly slow elevator, huh? “ - markiplier

“ shrjdjdhdn access tuner! what a dumbass! “ - markiplier

“ crouching is gonna be my new favourite pastime activity. it is! i’m not gonna do anything else. “ - fxgamerofficial

“ stop it with the loud horn orchestral movements! alright?! there’s no need for it, mozart. “ - fxgamerofficial

“ that scared the shite out of me. “ - fxgamerofficial

“ what was that for then? whhhyyy- why did the music decide to do that to me? i’m only in a locker, it’s not that exciting for a crescendo like that. “ - fxgamerofficial

——

boom! first post done. i’m so cool and pog /j