#been getting physical therapy for it but idk how much its helping ;_; alas…

[ctommy]

my brother started watching house around the time i started having worsening leg pain and now whenever my pain is bad im like fuuuuuck im just like house ��� wilson i need vicodin….

[carmen-berzattos]

I'm really curious to see what you think of the episode once you watch it because I thought it wasn't that bad tbh

Hey nonnie, so I just finished watching the episode and I’m ... conflicted. I’m conflicted by my reactions towards this show since the Michael’s return SL ended tbh. In the first 7 episodes, I so obviously disliked the storylines and where it was headed but afterwards my reactions were not so resentful. I became a lot more ... conflicted because the writing is not obviously bad or bad bad, it just became confused, unfocused, rushed and somewhat inconsistent. Somewhat, being a generous qualification on my part tbh. So, I’m gonna try to break it down here. Keep in mind, though, that I haven’t given a ton of thought to what the show has had to offer in a while now. It seemed futile to me, primarily, but also, because I’ve been far too busy to actually spare too much energy here. Nonetheless, here it goes:

 First and foremost, the romance in this season fell on its face in a lot of way. Starting with the main romances of Petramos and Jafael.

1. Petramos: In a lot of ways, the trouble of Petramos is a lot easier to spot for me, a little more obvious, and a little less complicated than jafael’s, more contained than Jafael’s. Probably due to the shorter history of the relationship. I think the controversial revelation that Petra’s been lying to JR about Anezka this whole time was detrimental to the relationship in a nearly unfixable way. To fix it would need care and finesse and patience and build-up. JtV has always had some trouble with all of that, what’s with it being so dramatic and over-the-top, but I think it’s struggled to achieve nuanced writing especially this season. In that way, Petramos’s writing has been doomed since the very start of the season. Like fine, okay, you went ahead with the Petra lying, something that I won’t even get into how unlikely it seems to me, but the relationship needed a LOT more care than what they gave it. Having JR choose to get back with Petra so prematurely only to have them break-up later on did NOT do the writers any favor. Their reunion was rushed, their build-up was quick and a lot of it off-screen. And then their break-up was a disaster writing-wise. It wasn’t heartbreaking, it was angering and insulting to me as a viewer who has functioning braincells thank you very much. It was done for drama and did not really follow coherently, especially with the add-on of Petra wanting to propose and all that. It just fell on its face. For me, a much better way to deal with the situation would have been to let their season 4 break up land throughout the first half of the season, then come up with a reason for a rekindling, a tentative alliance, a careful build up that leaves me squealing like a schoolgirl when they reunite. Have Petra go through the journey of getting over JR in the first half, have her go through that character growth, and THEN reunite them. And here’s the thing, I’m still about 99% sure that Petramos is endgame, but we’re literally supposed to get the reunion and the endgame in ONE episode, an episode that’ll largely be about Jafael so like... IDEK man. This’ll be really hard to sell beyond the aesthetics of two gorgeous people getting together on your screen. 

2. Jafael: I have SO many conflicting emotions about Jafael this season. Don’t get me wrong, I love them, I ship them. I always will. And we did get some really good material over the course of the season, but boy oh boy, do I have problems with how this is all panning out. First and foremost, the treatment of this relationship with Michael’s return has been disastrous, and i think we can all agree on that. Like okay, fine, you want to reach this point of breaking up. Okay fine. You want to reintroduce the love triangle. Okay fine, but pray tell, what the actual fuck was that treatment of the storyline? I was genuinely excited about the potential for angst that this’ll give Jafael. I wanted the pain and the heartbreak, I wanted Rafael to be the one to break up with Jane because he just does not want to do this anymore, but the way they went about it was confusing to me. For example, I loved the idea of “Rafael got his memories back, too”. I thought that was clever, but to me the trigger of it was not as clever. Remember back in season 1 when Raf proposed and then he saw her laughing with Michael and that kind of contributed to sending him spiraling? Yeah, I needed something like that. Something to remind Rafael and the audience of this journey, a physical evidence of that trouble in front of him. We got none of that of course. And then we had to deal with the whole Mateo thing and Mateo’s feelings and involvement and it was so not the right focus. It lacked feeling, it lacked heart, it lacked things that were genuinely a part of the core of Jane as a show. The whole point of Michael returning was supposed to be the emotional baggage of it all, but it turns out JtV was truly not at all equipped to handle something with that complexity. So the break up was a bit of a mess in that regards and I’m just... yeah. Let’s just leave it there for now. 

Because what was even more aggravating than the break-up, is their reunion. I’m not gonna get into the whole thing about Raf’s depression here (see below the section about characters), but what I will get into here is, how in fuck’s name did we get a whole reunion SL without even a glimpse of what, exactly, was going through Raf’s mind as he went through therapy? Like just how? How did he come to not trust her? How did he come to realize that he’ll always love her? What the f was going on in his mind this whole time? Was he pining in his own way, too? Okay, fine, you don’t want to give us this storyline about his depression (why thank you, fuck you too), but can you uhhh, IDK give us a SL about them getting through their issues. Remember Jafael in season 1 and 2 going to therapy to hash out their trouble? I miss those days. I’m honestly beyond flabbergasted that they did not immediately march into a therapist’s office and try to fix their trouble. That would’ve made their whole journey come full circle. It would have helped dissect their problems. His and hers. How they’l move on. How they’ve grown together. You know, the kind of stuff you do when you tell a person that you don’t trust them anymore but you also really love them? Remember the proposal episode? Yeah, how the F did we not get a we’re going to therapy SL afterwards? And now, in 5x17, Raf is like I’m not worried about MIchael trying to win you back again, anymore. And I’m like, k, cool, but why? We have seen very little development in that regards, can you please explain it better? Can you please show me more? PLEASE? But I guess not, and it is what it is now. 

In a lot of ways, Jafael’s trouble is that the show is trying to cram 2 or more seasons worth of buildup and SL into half a season, half a season whose focus has been disastrous to say the least. So yeah, the reunion has been tainted for me with a lot of trouble. And now, thinking about it, I actually can’t find very clear ways in which Jafael’s journey this season could have been fixed wih easy and simple shuffling of certain events. To truly make it pop, they NEEDED to delve deep into Rafael’s mental health, which is not a simple fix in itself. Otherwise, this only partially satisfactory stuff is all we are left with. In my mind right now, I think I would have gone much farther back, though, and tweaked their story to maintain the Michael returns SL without it making the story so bland and aggravating. I think I wouldn’t have let Jafael get together at all in season 4. Rafael, following that breakdown he had with Jane in 4x05 goes to therapy. Jane has a romance with Adam that runs its course. Jafael rebuild their friendship and start to catch feelings again. They’re really falling in love and about to get back together when BAM Michael returns. I think that would have worked for the purposes of the triangle more. Jane is not really committed to anyone, except now she’s in love with Raf. And it would have made even her choice more powerful. But alas, it is what it is. But even more ideally, IDK, come up with a more creative obstacle than Michael’s return. 

3. Villadero: Honestly, I’m only gonna talk about them to vent, cause I’m MAD, you guys, so MAD and I don’t even ship it. But I’m MAAAAAD. Like just... okay, okay, you take all of season 5 and it’s literally just Jennie shitting on M/J and I’m like what the actual fuck? The blows never stopped coming? Michael returning only to have his heart broken all over again not enough for ya? Having to see Mateo say that he hates him not enough? Oh, no, it’s not. We gotta not only make the book about their relationship a flop (which like, fine, as an aspiring writer it’s cool to see this being a more complicated journey for Jane than an immediate hit) but to also have its publication be a literal bribery? Why?? JUST WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY? And then to imply that M/J where just a step for Jafael and M/C now?????????????????? WHY WHY WHY???????????????????? Remember the show that had Jane worry that her moving on with Raf would make it seem as if Michael is just a step? I want that show back. I just... UGH. 

Characters and characterization is another thing that the show really struggled with this season. Like a LOT. 

1. Petra: I’ll start with Petra because I honestly think she got the better deal out of everyone. This season has really managed to highlight and showcase how much she’s grown and how far she’s come. I think aside from the supposed plan to propose to JR, Petra has been the least inconsistent this season. Though she did have lines that showed real amnesia on the writers part, like telling Jane that JR is the reason she doesn’t lie and manipulate anymore. But oh well, she did well. 

2. Jane: I feel like Jane has lost a lot of her vibrance this season. I can’t really pin point why, but I think it’s a combination of reducing her to her bouts of guilt, the weird way that they’ve dealt with her career this season, fluctuating between utter disregard and then literal cramming of episodes worth of her writing development into half an episode (I mean Ro has FAAAAAAAR more build up towards This is Mars than Jane has with her book) it’s been really hard to see the life that Jane exuded in the past. 

3. Rafael: I’m tired. I don’t wanna talk about it. I’m just tired. 

4. Michael: Also tired. I just wanted him to feel like a person with emotions and trauma but like... *rubs forehead*

5. Xiomara: This makes me the MOST tired. She faded into the background so much I want to ram my head through a wall. Like what the fuck man just what the fuck? The build up of her going to nursing school came from no where. Now she’s willing to go to NY so quickly? No struggle? All the struggle is on Ro’s part? Why just why I don’t understand how the writers who gave us Xo from season 1-4 can just suddenly forget. Even the wrap up of her cancer SL was anticlimactic. It’s just. 

Also, Luisa deserves better. 

Another thing that season severely struggles with is focus. So much screentime for Jorge and Alba and it’s just not that interesting of a SL. So much time for River Fields and literally no one I know gives a flying fuck. So much wasted time, time that should have gone to Raf’s depression, more Luisa, and definitely more Xo. But NOOOO we had to deal with River’s relationship with her daughter and I’m like... who even gives a damn? 

One last thing I’ll say cause I’m too tired to say anymore about this, though I could: where are the magical realism elements in the show? Where has that magical feeling about them gone???????????????

Anyways, let’s see how they wrap it up I guess.