#becoming a vampire in a vampire story is always the correct choice

[misty-moth]

If ikevamp MC became a vampire in the mansion, she could just wait until the day she went to the Louvre and resume her life from there, right? If even just long enough to tell her friends and family that she’s okay. If she misses her life for a century, she’ll at least know it’s still there and there will be a vacancy coming up.

Hell, she could even show up at the museum and watch her first run-in with Comte since there was already a crowd there. Maybe she pushed rogue Swiss man into her past self to jostle her earring; we just don’t know what she’s capable of 😒…

[flowerslut]

I don't know about you but I've always hated the trope of vampires being addicted to blood like it was drugs. That's like saying that a human can be addicted to regular water if they drink too much so they have to filter it or something to change it. I don't know, I just don't understand why they would be 'addicted' to the very thing they need to survive? It makes me think of the quote from Mad Max; Fury Road "Do not, my friends, become addicted to water. It will take hold of you, and you will resent its absence!" In saying that, I do find it very funny that Jasper can be addicted to certain emotions, like how he was following Bella around the house and reluctantly leaving rooms she was in when she came to visit because he was getting 'high' off her good mood and Edward was so bemused to see him in that state because he's typically sounded by moody bitches who always argue and complain so he's not used to someone (other than Alice but I think he's used to her now, whereas Bella would be a bit like a slap in the face I think) being so genuinely happy that he follows her around like pepe lepew and skunk stink. I read a fic once about Jasper/Alice and Emmett/Rosalie going to college and meeting there and joining frats and they were around a bunch of drunk college kids and Jasper was ALSO starting to act a little drunk and loose and silly because SO MANY DRUNK KIDS all in the same space together was starting to affect him too. I don't know. I've just been thinking about it

I've never really thought twice about the whole "blood thirst as an allegory for addiction/human vices" because that's always been tied together really well with most vampire stories. I sort of expect that measure of symbolism from vampire media now, and tbh you'd really have to do some heavy, intense worldbuilding to make a vampire universe where bloodlust isn't akin to sex or addiction or some sort of taboo in order to make it still have the correct ~vibes~ (not that it's impossible, but I think the struggle to having to resist, or not resist, is honestly part of the lure for some people.)

and I know what you're trying to do with the "humans can't be addicted to water" thing but if water could only be obtained through killing other people (which, ahem, *gestures to history books*) then people sure would be snapping necks to get it, aaand that makes for an interesting story! I think it (obsession with blood being used as an allegory for drug addiction) can lead to some really interesting story dynamics and plot conflict!!

"I just don't understand why they would be 'addicted' to the very thing they need to survive?" because it's interesting! what do you do when you have to kill to survive, even if it goes against everything you've ever been taught? i love it. 10/10. bring on the pain game. I want to see the hoops people will jump through to moralize their choices!!!! its fun dude!!!!! 🤩

it is cute that jasper's drawn to happy emotions but the way that stephenie implements it makes me roll my eyes half of the time. especially when edward is like "wow bella, jasper loves being around because your emotions are soooo nice and pure and good and addicting because our love is so #Strong! 😌" like, yawwwwn. talk about an informed trait. sorry steph I will never care about edbella 😔 and also, like, reading twilight from bella's pov we... really don't get the proof of her being such a happy person. homegirl has self-esteem issues out the ass so color me skeptical that her emotions were really that alluring 🙄

but it does lead to fun opportunities for headcanons whenever people ask "so...alice just walked up to jasper and he just? went with it?" because if all it takes is a bitch with a good mood to have this war criminal trailing behind them then jasper never stood a chance at being an independent entity. he would've been simping for the first person who didn't feel revulsion toward him. I guess we should be happy it was alice that scooped him up and not someone less cool and hot and fun

but yes! i love the opportunity for jasper's gift to really mess with him and its SO fun to play around with it in fic!!!! breaking dawn doesn't have a lot that I love but if does have some fun "jasper having to feel some nonsense" moments

[lunas-otome-blog]

Luna's Review: Code: Realize ~Guardian of Rebirth~

Official Summary:

Venture into a reimagined steampunk version of 19th century London. Follow the adventures of the poison-skinned maiden Cardia, the men trying to help her, and the mysterious organization intent on capturing her.

Experience a visual novel adventure brimming with literary and historical characters including Victor Frankenstein and Abraham van Helsing. Will Cardia find love, or destroy those she cares for? Her story is in your hands.

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(Spoiler-Free) Luna's Thoughts

This game was ok! It wasn't the trainwreck that was "even if Tempest," nor was its storyline as convoluted as "Cafe Enchante." I liked the historical figures and other fictional references, and the art was lovely.

A small thing that annoyed me is that they keep referring to Cardia's skin as "poisonous." I believe poison has to be ingested, so it would be more correct to say she is "acidic," but I guess that's not very charming to say lol. There are also a few plot points that seem a bit silly, and I didn't think the true end character necessarily deserved that role.

But overall, this was a solid game. The steampunk London setting was cool AF and I enjoyed the emphasis on airships and steam power. All the routes were pretty different, and though I would have liked to see more crossover between them, none of them felt extremely out of line like in some other games I've played.

I wasn't excited enough about it to bother with the ample supply of bonus content on offer, but I did like it and would consider playing it again in the future.

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(SPOILERS) Common Route

Honestly, Cardia's backstory is the weakest part of the game as writers scramble to explain why she can't wear normal clothes or stay in one room for long. She can't eat with normal utensils, for example, but nobody is concerned that she might melt through her bed because her hair covers her back and her hair isn't poisonous for some reason. Some details were given a lot of thought and some are just explained away with "science" that happens off screen.

None of that is truly an issue, but I feel like it could have easily been more streamlined to say, for example, that Cardia can melt living things. That would still have the effect of making her isolated, alone, treated like a freak and unable to interact with humans. But it would do away with some of the more contrived details such as how she avoids melting into the ground.

The scene that should have been one of the most emotional — when Cardia tells the story of how she was trapped in a cave and accidentally killed her mother figure — ends up feeling frustrating, as you yell "just melt the rock!" at the screen the entire time. She does, but not until too late. "But she didn't know she created toxic air!" you say. Ok, but surely she didn't want to sit in the cave indefinitely? She could have just started work to melt the rock immediately. Maybe the result would have been the same, but at least it would seem more logical.

I thought the first choice to ignore Lupin's offer, which dead ends the game as Cardia sets out on her own adventure, was very funny. I also liked how she starts becoming more expressive as she spends time with her boys. My favorite part is how it shows her gaining skills and learning to fight and defend herself. That's refreshing compared to some other series where the protagonist is always being protected.

Below follows some thoughts on the actual routes, in the order I played them.

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(SPOILERS) Impey Barbicane

What I thought was going to be my least favorite route ended up being my favorite. Impey is the flirt archetype, and also the genki character of the game. His route was the lightest, as he carries the least baggage of all the characters, but his sincere nature got to me.

Unfortunately, his flirtiness makes him annoying in other routes. Like, boy, I'm romancing someone else, back off!!

I do wish Impey being a vampire was more relevant to the game in general. I know that angsting over the fate of the vampires was more for Victor, Helsing and Delacroix II, but having Impey be a vampire was basically thrown in for shock value and didn't end up being super relevant.

I did think Nemo was an extremely fun villain and his design and speech pattern are so unique. He was a good foil for Impey, as they have similar reasons for becoming engineers, but he becomes the typical "mad scientist" here and takes everything a little too far.

I'd say Impey's route was the simplest of the five, but for that reason, I also thought it was the most solid, and the one that left me with the least questions.

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(SPOILERS) Saint-Germaine

Call me nitpicky, but Saint-Germain is the character with the most baffling design choices IMHO. His hair is ridiculous. He only wears half of his coat the entire time. He has watches all over his arms that seem to do nothing. Truly some odd decisions were made during his creation.

Aside from Victor, I'd say his route was the most angsty as he rebels against his job and his nature to save Cardia. Unfortunately, this results in him being off screen for a lot of his route as he kills his way through the other members of Idea to save Cardia.

I thought the whole route felt a bit overkill-y. This is a man who essentially caused the Black Plague, who knows what one bad decision can do, and yet instead of choosing to stay by her side and defend her, he abandons her to preemptively fight the other Idea members, none of whom are given a sprite except Guinivere. (Side note: I adore Guinivere. Easily one of the most rad characters of the game.)

What's stopping any other of the Idea members from attacking Cardia while she's left defenseless? It falls apart under scrutiny. Perhaps this is because Saint-Germain's attraction to Cardia was the least convincing for me. I just didn't feel much of a connection there.

I do love how you basically only see his eyes on his route. It makes it all the more threatening when you do. And despite how critical I'm being, I did think the concept of the Apostles of Idea was pretty cool. I just thought it was a little far reaching for the framework of this particular game.

While one of the more interesting routes, I'd call Saint-Germain's route the least romantic.

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(SPOILERS) Victor Frankenstein

Personality-wise, Victor is my favorite character. He's got baggage but desperately wants to reverse the damage he's done inadvertently. And he's so sweet and wears glasses! I did want to know what was up with his headphones but they're never addressed.

Victor's route is the one where you have to deal the most with Queen Victoria, and at least for me, this kind of ruined her character for me. You learn she was the instigation behind a lot of dark incidents and has an even darker one planned that basically equates to genocide. While in the true ending she fesses up and seems to have grown as a character, it was hard for me to get behind her again after seeing how needlessly cruel she was in Victor's route.

I absolutely adored the development of the Queen's relationship with Leonhardt in this route. Honestly I ship them more than most of the characters in this game with Cardia. Even if you want to interpret them as having a more father-daughter relationship, it's still really sweet. He clearly cares so much for her and just wants to guide her down the right path.

But back to Victor. I like that, despite being the gentle nerd of the game, he can still fight in his own way, and even teaches Cardia to do the same. It was nice to see him come out of his shell and become more confident as the game progresses.

Victor's route was solid and his relationship with Cardia is very believable. After all, he's done so much for her. He's the reason, in every route, that she can eat with the boys and wear different outfits. Cardia returns the favor by forgiving him for being involved in her creation. I did think the brief "is Victor my father" storyline was pretty funny. I mean, he kinda is though.

All in all, one of the better routes in my opinion.

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(SPOILERS) Abraham Van Helsing

Man, I wanted to like this route more than I did.

Van Helsing is the closest thing to a tsundere in this game, so I thought I'd like him and saved him for last before the true end. Unfortunately, he's so cool and collected that he rarely breaks, and he comes across as cruel a lot of the time, even when it's revealed that he's doing so to keep Cardia out of it. She's kept at arms' length so much that I didn't feel the relationship developed naturally. She isn't present for a lot of the conversations, either, though we do get to see them off-screen.

Helsing's route is also the one that's least connected to the rest of the storyline. He's got a few tie-ins, most notably to the Vampire War, but his dealings with Aleister didn't relate to the overall mission. It felt a little disjointed to me.

I also thought we'd see more of Delacroix II in this route. I figured it would be Cardia helping the two of them become friends. Delacroix needed to learn that Helsing regretted his actions. But we honestly don't get a lot of that. I also figured it would be more angsty, with Helsing's death wish being relevant, but again, that didn't come up a lot.

I do find it extremely endearing that he can't cook to save his life. And I feel bad that his is the only route that ends without him being able to touch Cardia.

I don't think this was a bad route. It just wasn't what I was expecting so it made me a little disappointed.

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(SPOILERS) Arsene Lupin

Lupin's route was ok. My gripes are mainly the same as with the true end of Collar x Malice: I don't think he's fitting for a true end character.

Not only is he visually the least interesting character, but his backstory is also not particularly interesting or impactful. A lot of stuff happens on his route just because it's the true end, and we have to wrap up the game. Lupin himself isn't particularly relevant to that.

He's a nice guy, sure. You can't help but like him and his positive attitude. I think his route is the one that most treats Cardia like a human, but this comes at the cost of not allowing her to do a lot. This could be seen as a positive, I suppose. She's spend most of the other routes convincing other characters that they should be forgiven, so it's fitting to have the final route involve forgiving Cardia herself for being created.

All in all, the game wraps up pretty well, and it felt like a suitable end for everyone. I just wish Lupin was a bit more interesting of a character.

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(SPOILERS) Side Characters

Here, I'm going to comment on a few side characters in the game.

Finis

No notes. Flawless character design. My theory for why he looks like this is that the original Finis and Cardia were both female. Maybe this is explained in the bonus content, idk. I've heard his hair donuts are part of the headband and not his actual hair. Either way, adorable. More male characters like this, please.

Herlock Sholmes

Upset this character wasn't a datable option. Perhaps that's for the bonus content. Either way, I wanted to see more of him. I thought he'd be more relevant in Lupin's route, and you do get to learn a bit about him, but not enough IMHO.

Queen Victoria

Who approved this outfit? I just wanna talk... Seriously, this is the worst sprite in the game. I get that her whole thing is about bees and visually there are a lot of honeycomb references, but surely we could have a black and yellow outfit that doesn't make her look like she raided an antique store.

[doc-hudson]

"Myeah" Paul nodded as he aired his drink a little, never minding that it didn't really needed it "'t's difficult to explain, really, you'd have to see a 'race' to fully get it. 's not only 'bout speed, but also 'bout agility 'n general and creativity to navigate obstacles -hell, Battle Specialty Sorcerers also do pretty well when they join"

He then took a sip of his whiskey, then moved towards the almost forgotten bottle in order to refill both his glass and Bullseye's.

"I feel like we owe them big time" he said, with a shrug "Those Vampires, I mean; I know the relationship you guys and the rest of the Magicks have 's pretty complicated-"

(Not unlike with the wolves).

"-and that Radiator Springs has a couple o' things to say 'bout their choices-" Doc added with a joking tone mostly to diminish the impact of it and maybe help Bullseye forget about the less-than-pleasant part of the story "-but I find it...I dunno, heartwarmin', in a way? That they spent so much of their time, money and effort helpin' a specially niche sport become bigger, specially when participatin' there would...you know, force a Vampire to expose themselves 'n a way, due to the rules"

It was...complicated. There wasn't much privacy there: people knew that if you participated on the Magick Grand Prix, you had to be a Magick and...well, one had to disclose what kind of Magick they were, which was easier for some of them: for those that were 'benign' Magicks or more common ones-

-even there, where different natures were celebrated, there were still a bit of taboos. It was rather ironic, and sad.

But things were changing, little by little, and the fact that Vampires had helped bring the sport to were it was today, helped a little.

'But in all fairness, most people prob'ly would know him. He jus' happened t' get stuck wit' th' one guy who's been under a proverbial rock for a hundred years.'

Paul laughed at that, shaking his head 'no' in return.

"Nah, 's okay. Again, we're part of a very niche sport an' the kid has a bit of an ego"

He paused.

"Had" he corrected "He's well-known 'n some circles, specially 'round California, but he's spent so much there that I guess he forgot what it was like outside o' 'em. That's why he had a hard time adaptin' to bein' a somewhat-average-Joe again; Again, 'm sorry he didn't give you a glowin' first impression he's just...a little bit stupid and young"

And he couldn't help but laugh at that part because...well, in a way, he was, too, compared to Bullseye: young.

(Also, a little bit stupid, he guessed, since wisdom came along with age most of the time).

Again, It was easy to forget about...well, that, about the age difference between them when they were ironically physically inverted and...well, it was an exercise in suspension of disbelief, too: for everything Paul knew about the wild west had been formed by books and movies (and the occasional comic book, sure), and as such felt like too far away of a time, felt unreal to him.

But it had been real to Bullseye: and his stories reminded Doc of that, and that things weren't always black and white; Things weren't about good and bad guys, and sometimes those classifications overlapped and didn't make the other worse or better because of it.

"Things were hard" he nodded "I get it: A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do an' sometimes that takes us places we probably wouldn't have gone to otherwise"

Bullseye being a former bandit was still a surprise, but Paul could accept it -probably because of how far away that part of his story was to the current day, and that the man admitted to being there along for the ride as opposed to really having his heart into it.

"You're probably one of the nicest people I know, Bullseye" he said, after taking yet another sip of his drink "and definitely the nicest old-timey bandit I've ever met"

That last part was, of course, said mostly in jest.

"I don't really care what you did before, nothin' 's changin' what I think and feel 'bout you: and that's that you're one of the kindest, most helpful, most patient people 'round here"

He smiled and uncharacteristically soft smile, as he looked at the other man.

"An' wonderful friend to have"

@bullseye-stoddard

Oh, of course people involved in the Magick Grand Prix were Magicks themselves. Obviously that had been a silly question. But Bullseye figured he had made it clear enough that he had been out of the loop for a long time that Paul would not think it was too stupid of a question. "Ah, no wonder she's good at somethin' like that. But I gotta think, wit' it bein' a magic contest, there's some extra special rules for what you can an' can't do. 'Cause if it was jus' a race, I feel like you Speed Gifteds would win wit'out much effort!"

He really knew nothing about the contest, so when Paul imparted the fact that vampires were behind the sport's popularity, Bullseye stared at him in amazement. "Huh, now I never woulda guessed that! I mean yeah, most vampires aren't as skittish as I am, but still. I wouldn't o' thought they'd have had a hand in buildin' up a big ol' magic show like that!"

Bullseye remembered Paul mentioning where he was from, and while he did not know the town itself, he was aware of Route 66 and how towns had sprung up along the road, only to be left behind when the highways came into being. "Guess that makes sense, t' move it t' a bigger place if it became such a thing. Sorry that was a blow t' th' town, though. I know 'nuff 'bout how a lotta things got affected when th' highways came 'round t' know it prob'ly didn't do 'em no favors."

In his case, however, it had been the opposite. Roads and towns kept getting closer and closer to his ranch, and instead of taking away activity, it had only added more. He did not want to say that he felt the townsfolk in Radiator Springs were better off without the activity, but at least he could agree that it sounded like a good place to lay low. Not that he wanted to think about possibly having to leave town, but it was nice to know he had options.

He took another sip of the drink and gave a nod. "I sure will, if the situation ever arises. Wish I'd known 'bout th' town 'fore I came all th' way over here, but then o' course I wouldn't o' met you." He also would not have reunited with Jessie, or met any of the other people in town he had been slowly getting to know, so clearly he had made the right choice. At least, he hoped he had.

Even if Lightning had been less than cordial the first time they had met, Bullseye could not help smiling at how Paul talked about him. Obviously he had the skills to back up his bravado, and maybe there had been a time when he had a better attitude, because their last meeting had made it seem like he could mend his ways if he really tried. "That is a hell o' an accomplishment. I mean, I figured he was good at somethin'. I jus' didn't like th' way he came in an' 'spected me t' know who he was an' what he'd done. But in all fairness, most people prob'ly would know him. He jus' happened t' get stuck wit' th' one guy who's been under a proverbial rock for a hundred years."

For which there were plenty of reasons why he had, and while once again Bullseye did not mind talking about his past with Paul, the specific question about gunning down bandits gave him a little pause. Giving a nervous cough, he said, "Well, uh, not 'zactly. I originally got th' nickname from my pa. He was so proud o' how well I learned t' shoot that he started callin' me Bullseye. An' once I lost him, clingin' t' th' name helped t' keep him wit' me in a way."

He could have left it at that, figuring that Paul would not question the answer. But his honesty made him continue. "He…He weren't th' only one who dubbed me that, though. I told you that I, er, kinda fell in wit' th' wrong crowd later on. Well they thought I was darn good at shootin' too, so they decided t' call me Bullseye too." A sad coincidence, he supposed, yet it had only given him another reason to cling to the nickname.

Taking another sip of his drink, Bullseye gave Paul a sheepish smile. "Wish I could tell you things were jus' like in th' movies, an' that all the good guys won an' all th' bad guys got what was comin' t' 'em. But if that had been th' case…then I prob'ly wouldn't o' been 'round long 'nuff t' have had th' chance t' get turned in th' first place. 'Cause, well...I was one o' those bandits. Can't say I cut th' kinda figure all th' bad guys in th' movies do, though. I was jus' kinda…along for th' ride. You see, I'd lost one family, an' while my new one wasn't quite th' righ' sort, they were all I had, an' I didn't wanna lose 'em too." Which he had, in the end, so even his sticking with the gang through thick and thin had not stopped the inevitable.

@doc-hudson

[breaddwoo]

-Bloody Kisses-

pairing: wednesday x vamp! reader

word count: 3.22k

warnings: slight nsfw, blood

desc: wednesday helps you with your blood deficiency and becomes addicted to the pain of your bite :)

a/n: lowkey erotic despite there being nothing sexual 😭😭 will probably write a pt 2!!

edit: pt 2 is out :)

tonight was like any night for wednesday; pitch black gear on to help camouflage her in the dead of night, hoping to once again get a glimpse of the hyde.

what she didn't expect was to watch a girl tumble limply down the incline that wednesday took shelter at the bottom of.

she heard a few coughs, painful ones that sounded full of death. coughs like those came from people close to hades' door.

in her intrigue, wednesday couldn't help but lift from her hiding spot and slowly trek towards the girl laying face down in the fallen autumn leaves. she knelt, placing a hand on the girl's shoulder to flip her upright.

who she saw was someone she recognized to be one of enid's closest friends. from enid's stories, her name is (y/n) and she happened to be part of the vampire division of the school.

wednesday noticed your eyelids begin to flutter with consciousness and she took a step back.

when you fully opened them, it took you a second to recognize where you were. taking in your surroundings, wednesday's attentive gaze smothered you.

your arms began to lift you from the ground, but they went limp and you collapsed into the leaves once more.

"you look awful," wednesday said in her monotone voice.

you looked up to her, eye twitching with pain, "gee, thanks."

"i suppose you're (y/n)."

"and i suppose you're wednesday addams," you retorted, a painful coughing fit following soon after.

"how come you're in this state?" she questioned. it almost sounded like concern, but you knew enough from enid that wednesday doesn't feel emotions like that.

you let out a self-pitying laugh, "i can't ingest the animal blood offered at school. i always throw it up, no matter how hard i try. i'm dying and i can't tell anyone."

"are you not already dead?"

her insensitivity was astounding.

"my bad for not using the correct terminology," you spat, another coughing fit taking over your lungs and causing you to clench the soil beneath.

as wednesday watched your life drain from your weak body, an idea dug itself into her thoughts. "is it human blood that you desire?"

you looked at her like she was stupid. the expression on your face was answer enough, so she continued, "i will give you some of mine."

now your pale face was dumbstruck. is this bitch crazy?

"why the fuck would you want to do that?" you asked, thinking her suggestion was absolute nonsense.

"to say that i am curious about the feeling of a vampire bite would be a... crude understatement," she replied, her eyes the color of the sky above, omitting the stars.

you shook your head defiantly, "absolutely not. i don't think i could control myself, i might just suck you dry."

wednesday's mouth twitched, restraining a masochistic smile.

"do you really have a choice, (y/n)? "

you looked down at yourself. your throat felt like hell fire and every single limb held an unbearable ache. you were treading a thin line between immortality and mortality, and that scared you.

running a hand through your hair, you gazed back up at her, "fine. we do this once, and i will owe you. just please, please don't tell anyone. i'm afraid everyone will believe i'll go ballistic without blood and i'll get expelled."

wednesday nodded and slowly sat beside you, her small frame accentuated by the moon light behind her. getting a better look, you could tell how pretty she was. enid never mentioned that.

"what is it that you need me to do?"

you looked at her, examining what she was wearing. a black spaghetti strap dress that zipped from behind with a long sleeved turtle neck beneath.

realizing what you were about to say, your face began to warm, "uhm- you'll need to uh, to removed the turtle neck under your dress."

she nodded, then said, "it would be easier if you would unzip the dress for me."

how she kept a calm, emotionless expression on her face was beyond you. having this much contact with someone you've only heard about through stories made your face flush red.

after unzipping her dress, wednesday didn't even hesitate to pull the turtle neck over her head. this exposed most of her bare, pale back and the inky lace bra that her clothes had hidden. you were intensely mortified.

"w-wait, are you okay with me seeing this? i-" your words of embarrassment were cut short by more hacking, this time with a string of blood down the side of your mouth.

"i am fine," she stated, moving the dress back up and concealing her bra once more. now her shoulders and neck were fully exposed. your mouth practically flooded with saliva at the thought of piercing the smooth skin with your fangs.

"(y/n), " she said, this time with a little force in her tone, "do it. i want you to."

these words made your chest tighten. you tried to breathe a little more steady, "okay."

scooting closer to her, you moved one of her black braids from the left side of her neck to let it hang behind her. you took her bare shoulders in your hands, leaning close to the skin of her exposed neck.

though you felt awful for what you were about to do, you also felt completely exhilarated.

and, surprisingly, so did wednesday. the way you gently caressed her as your warm breath tickled the skin about to be pierced; it had her mind tangling in knots that she couldn't be bothered to unravel.

the prick of pain that followed the penetration of your teeth made wednesday's entire body shiver. she was hyper aware of the blood draining from the spot you assaulted but the feeling was intensely pleasing.

she felt warm. then she felt cold. her shoulder went fuzzy, like it no longer blonged to her. then her mind floated in a euphoria she'd never experienced before; the pain was like a bruise she enjoyed pressing on.

you also felt incredible. with each second that passed by, it felt like life was entering your body once more. the liquid vitality that you consumed almost made your still heart beat again.

you loved the feeling. you wanted to drink. you wanted all of it, all of her. but in the back of your mind, a small voice screamed at you to stop. the voice got louder until you forced yourself to pull away.

a small stream of blood dripped to wednesday's collarbone. "you can lick it," she said in a monotone voice laced with need. you shook your head, wiping your mouth.

wednesday couldn't wrap her head around the euphoric feeling that your bite had inflicted on her; all she knew was that she wanted to experience it again.

with your fangs on full view, color returned to your face and a body back to it's original state, you looked like a whole new person. this thought set a fire ablaze in her stomach and she couldn't tell if she enjoyed it or not.

her arms felt like wet noodles. she tried to lift them, attempting to put her garment back on; it was to no avail.

you saw this, "i'm sorry, i drank too much. let me help you."

as you went to help her, she fell backwards onto your lap. eyes widening in concern, you lean close to check her complexion, "wednesday, are you okay? i'm sorry, i really should have restrained myself. "

"no," she shook her head adamantly, "i requested this. and it's not like being in this state is unenjoyable."

you pressed your lips together in a line full of judgement, but said nothing. after her clothes were placed back on her, she tried to lift herself off of you.

"wait, wait- trust me, if you can't put your own clothes on then you can't stand by yourself," you said with care, standing and placing her arm around your shoulders.

the walk back to nevermore was quiet. neither of you spoke a word, wednesday too light headed from the painful pleasure of your teeth. she even forgot what she had been doing outside in the first place.

when you arrived at her dorm, she was still weak and needed support. wednesday held a finger to her lips. her dead eyes motioned to the door. you knew that enid was inside, and hopefully, she was asleep.

with the door unlocked, you assisted wednesday to her bed. when you went to set her down, however, you tripped on the corner of her bedsheets that hung to the floor.

wednesday's eyes widened in surprise as you came crashing down on top of her. chest to chest, the details of her face were in close proximity. you could practically trace patterns in her constellation of freckles.

shuffling and the sound of a comforter moving came from the other side of the room. enid.

wednesday's arms encircled you as she pressed you closer to her chest, forcing your head to hide in the crook of her neck.

your face was practically on fire. this is so not how tonight was supposed to go.

"shhh," she whispered, completely unfazed. you could tell she was being cautious of her sleeping roommate.

as her soft, black hair began to tickle your nose, she released you. you quickly backed away from her, making sure you stayed quiet.

"thank you," you whisper. she gives you a slightly perplexed expression in response.

tiptoeing to the door, you open it. looking behind one last time, you notice that wednesday has situated herself into a more comfortable position. you waved at her, and close the door without a sound.

wednesday lay there, mind recounting the events of the night. she tried to cipher through them, but one thought continued to surface through the rest:

she smells like vanilla.

> > >

wednesday wanted to see you again. it seemed like every time she caught a glimpse of you in the hallway, you soon disappeared as if you hadn't been there.

it was starting to frustrate her. were you avoiding her?

the thought made her grind her teeth; it also made her insanely confused. normally, she would prefer that people avoided her. but with you, it just made her want to scratch at her skin.

finally, during lunch period a week later, she saw you sitting with enid and her group. wednesday contemplated whether or not it would be a good idea to go up to you; she had promised to keep the ordeal a secret. no one knew the two had any connection to one another.

her heart outweighed her brain in the end and she stepped into the maze of lunch tables.

"(y/n)," she called. the words you were speaking to enid dropped from your mouth when you noticed the girl in black next to you.

you smiled, fangs displayed, "oh, uh- hey, wednesday."

wednesday's eyes turned to where your tray should be, noticing that you had nothing to eat.

"i need to talk to you," she stated, "in private."

enid raised a brow, trying to subtly ask her why? but wednesday pretended to be ignorant; though, she knew she wouldn't be able to avoid an interrogation later.

you awkwardly laughed, giving a strained smile, "sure."

when wednesday lead you to a deserted hallway, her expression changed into a slightly angry one.

"are you avoiding me?" she asked bravely. you were surprised.

"well, we're not friends so i didn't think we needed to see one another."

the answer irritated her.

she tried to restrain her snarkiness, "i see you're still avoiding the animal blood."

you nodded, afraid of where this was going. it's not like you didn't enjoy what you both did a week ago; it was quite the opposite actually.

every time you thought of her your breath caught in your throat. the image of her bare shoulder basically served on a silver platter plagued your mind. god, avoiding her was awful.

you just knew that if you saw her again, you wouldn't be able to control yourself anymore. the little restraint you had was terrifying.

"so? what do you want?" your words came off a bit harsher than you intended, but you were afraid of her intentions.

she cracked a small smile, but it quickly dissipated as she said, "i want to do it again."

you knew it.

"wednesday, what we did- we can't do it again. i'm not as strong as you think," you tried to explain, "i was able to restrain myself last time. i won't be able to again."

wednesday took a step closer; her cold breath sending a ghostly chill down your spine.

"what if i don't want you to?"

you didn't know what to say. her words were painfully tempting; if you could, you would tear her uniform in the middle of the hallway and consume a waterfall.

you stayed silent for a moment, then cracked, "okay, fine, meet me at my dorm tonight. my roommate has plans so she won't be there."

elation filled wednesday to the brim; if she could scream and jump up and down in excitement she would've. instead, she nodded her head once and said, "see you then," before slipping into the darkness of the empty hallway before her.

you took a seat on a nearby bench, putting your head in your hands.

she really had you wrapped around her finger.

> > >

as you had instructed wednesday later in the day with a slip of your dorm key in her hand, she snuck into your room at the devil's hour.

there she caught you in pajamas, reading a book on your windowsill. she cocked her head a bit. the scene perplexed her.

wednesday had never seen you in casual clothing before; nor did she know that you enjoyed reading. this information was practically useless but it made her feel a closeness to you that felt impossible before.

your room wasn't bright like enid's; there were a few pinups of different artists and a cd collection on a small bookshelf. warm lighting made the room feel comfortable, unlike the white hospital lights that wednesday utilized in her own.

it took you a second to realize wednesday had arrived, quickly placing a bookmark in a page and turning towards her.

"are you sure you want to do this again?" you asked, wanting to reaffirm her consent.

wednesday already began taking off the black cardigan she wore over her tank top, looking at you with eyes that spelled are you daft?

you nodded, socked feet making small thumps on the ground as you walked toward your bed.

you patted the spot to your right. wednesday understood this signal, sitting close enough that her thighs touched your own.

a shaky breath left your throat. you were going to do this. it was too late to back out now; not with wednesday waiting patiently before you.

she pushed the strap of her tank top off her shoulder, leaving it completely naked. then you realized that the position the two of you were in wouldn't make this process comfortable enough.

"wednesday, do you mind- uh, shit, how do i say this," you were practically sweating as you swiveled towards her, legs criss crossed.

she mirrored your movements. her eyes were leveled with yours, patiently waiting for your directions.

"please- fuck, please sit in my lap. it'll give me the best angle so that i don't hurt you too badly."

you swore you saw a little flush spread on her freckled cheeks.

"alright," she agreed, crawling over to you. wednesday put her hands on your shoulders as she placed herself in the divot between your crossed legs. in this position, she was basically straddling you.

shit, isn't this a tad too intimate?

your thoughts were far beyond obsurd considering this was your request. knowing this, you sighed and let your eyes wander to her exposed shoulder.

"you're looking at it as if it's a buffet, you know," wednesday stated. you looked up at her, giving an annoyed face.

"i'm just nervous, geez."

wednesday's icey hand slithered up your back and rested at the nape of your neck. she guided your head closer, encouraging you to feast.

"do it," she whispered, her breath tickling your ear. by now, any self-discipline you tried to scrounge up had long vanished.

you leaned in. licking the chosen spot on her neck for a second, wednesday shuddered under your touch.

when you let your teeth puncture the virgin skin, you couldn't help but wrap her in your arms as you gripped her back.

wednesday let her head fall back, closing her eyes. the painful ecstasy was hers once again. this time felt different, though.

this time it was more than just the fangs deep in her skin; it was you, holding her tight as the familiar fragrance of vanilla washed over her senses. pain and pleasure were two sides of the same coin and wednesday felt light headed as she experienced both at once.

your fingers found their way under her tank top, wanting to grab at more than fabric. the taste of her blood made the world turn to static. your ears went deaf and all you could focus on was the girl in your lap and the way her jet black hair brushed against your face.

this act was like a drug administering the same affect on both addicts. you felt drunk and as your teeth sunk further in her shoulder, so did wednesday.

with her abdomen against yours, there was no room for you to get closer. when you pulled away, wednesday looked at you with her eyes half-lidded.

your mind was in a fog as you gazed at her. with the taste of blood still afflicting your tongue, your only thought was how beautiful wednesday looked.

and as she met your inebriated gaze, an overwhelming urge to kiss you took hold of her actions.

she leaned in. despite knowing close to nothing about you and wanting little to do with romance, she wanted you. she wanted you and the painful pleasure you bestowed upon her.

you got swept up in the moment and kissed her back instantly. you squeezed her closer, grazing her lip with your fang. irony blood tainted your lips. the taste left you higher than any drug.

opening her mouth, wednesday deepened the sinful kiss and you reciprocated in full. you felt like you couldn't breath. you didn't want to pull away.

just as wednesday's tongue skimmed your teeth, you pulled away.

deep breaths fogged the cold windows of the small dorm room. you still held her as her dead eyes held something a little more than a dark abyss; something even wednesday couldn't understand.

she wanted to continue, to ask you to bite her again and again and again. it didn't matter if you took all of her; it would be a great headline on a tombstone.

so, once you'd filled your lungs, wednesday stole away the distance of your lips once more.

you fell back, holding her. by now it was far past four in the morning, with school in three hours.

neither of you cared. the bloody kisses were an intoxication full of need; tonight would feel like forever.

[edwardsvirtue]

idk man, every time I see a post about how jacob was better for bella, how he accepted and understood her exactly how she was, how he could have made her so happy... i don't know how to say "yes! this is totally correct! but also missing the whole point."

the fact that bella had another option for happiness (where she wouldn't have to sacrifice anything or change herself at all) but STILL CHOSE EDWARD ANYWAY is meant to lend more significance to her decision, not to demonstrate that she somehow chose incorrectly. bella knows she has the potential to become something greater than what she is by becoming a vampire. she also knows that SHE can't make JACOB happy because she will never stop thinking about what could have been with edward. and i think this was what stephenie was trying to say with the HEA in breaking dawn.

it's not that team jacob is wrong, it's that the whole jacob/bella relationship was designed specifically to be a tragedy. stories have themes – it's not just about rewarding whichever character is the least problematic. i agree that stephenie communicated this theme really poorly, but this is how i've always personally interpreted eclipse. jacob deserved better than what he got, but he also deserved better than being bella's second choice.

[hanyaraksa]

Becoming a woman in "Valerie and Her Week of Wonders"

This is defitely one of my favourite films. "Valerie a týden divu" from 1970 is a surreal masterpiece. It is a fantasy horror from Czechoslovakia directed by Jaromil Jireš. This film together with Chytilova's daisies made me fall in love with the Czech New Wave. Interestingly, the original screenplay was written by Ester Krumbachova, who also worked on Daisies, but eventually Jires made some corrections to it. Krumbachova was also responsible for production design.

It is an extraordinary fantasy horror film about the transformation of a girl into a woman. The world that the film presents gives the impression of a fairy tale and a nightmare at the same time. It is not said where the story is happening, nor when it is happening. Although at first glance it may seem that the events that take place in the film do not make sense, the whole action in it is very clear.

Valerie wakes up one day and realizes that her earrings are gone. During her search she notices a scary looking man with a mask- Constable. Valerie is very confused by the strange world that surrounds her. Everything is suddenly ... strange, her relations with others, society's attitude towards her, but men treat her and look at her differently, but she has to come to terms with these changes. Against her will, her age robs her of innocence. In the film, the girl's room, as well as her clothes, are mostly white. Valerie is also becoming more and more aware of her sexuality against her will. This is due to the sudden change in men's attitudes towards her, someone who was supposed to protect her before now acts like a predator.

The aesthetics of the film are very girlish, quiet and delicate, but at the same time it is filled with obscure fantasies and a sense of uneasiness. Together with a very unique score, the film gives the impression that it is a dream of an adolescent girl, filled with violence, sexuality, but also flowers and the warmth of the sun's rays and the first infatuation.

it also shows the tragedy of femininity. After Valerie managed to get rid of the priest who wanted to rape her, he turned the townfolk against her and accused her of witchcraft, which was why they wanted to burn her at the stake. Additionally, another young woman gets married which makes her very unhappy, because she was not given a choice, Valerie cures the same woman from a vampire bite with her warmth and love. The conflict between the individual (a young girl) and society is shown, she cannot trust the adults in her life.

In Vítěszlav Nezval’s book, on which the film was based on, the action is set in motion by Valerie’s first menstruation, We do not really know if the events taking place are 100% real, or if they are just an element of Valerie's imagination, who tries to cope with loneliness (she is an orphan) and living in a tiny boring town.

Valerie grows brave through her experiences. The entire film is a feast for the eyes. The viewer observes Valeries journey that resembles a ritual which introduces her to the world of femininity and adulthood. Valerie, like most young girls, however, has to make this journey alone, learn to make decisions on her own, because adults do not necessarily always know what is best, because they themselves are often driven by their own greed. As horrible as it may seem, everyone has to get used to this new world and accept its madness.

I saw this "Valerie and Her Week of Wonders" for the first time when I was a teenager, now every time I come back to it, I am overwhelmed by an incredible melancholy behind this wonderful and beautiful, but also at the same time nightmarish time of adolescence.

[councillor-roland]

"I believe so. Your support is appreciated, however, as always." He smiled to show he wasn't just being flippant. Roland did honestly appreciate how good a friend Merek had been to him this last little while, listening to his drunken rants and sob stories and so on. Merek had obviously caught him looking, not that Roland had been trying to hide his appreciation, and he smiled wider at the wink. He wasn't ashamed, why should he be? Merek knew how attractive he was and Roland was always drawn to beauty.

"Lucien's been restricting visiting hours, then? How unfair." Roland would never have responded well to being barred from seeing someone he wanted to see. Granted, he was in a different position from Merek, but still. The vampire sipped his wine and shook his head. "Well who would choose to be a slave? It seems like a terrible decision." Most of them didn't get the choice, obviously, but Merek had clearly made the correct one by becoming staff. Slave wouldn't have been fitting for him anyway though he would've been very popular in the Undercroft, Roland was sure, if he hadn't gotten claimed quickly. He glanced down at his glass and swirled the contents, thinking. "Do you want me to talk to Lucien? Intercede on Kaden's behalf, perhaps?" It wasn't usually done and Roland did it least of all but Merek was his friend, the least he could do was try to help him out. He and Lucien had reached a sort of strange understanding after Christmas, too, though he doubted that would buy him much leeway. Still, if Merek wanted him to he could see what strings he could pull.

"Well, then, I'm sure things will turn around for the two of you in no time." Though maybe Merek was a little easier than Rhys and it would take more to win him around, but he supposed time would tell. Whatever happened, the pyromancer knew that he'd ben there for Roland if the councilman needed him. Stretching out just a bit more, Merek glanced at the vampire in time to see the older man admiring him and the chief of staff gave him a playful wink and a smile before he relaxed back into the couch.

"You would think, but it certainly doesn't feel like that. Though I might have just gotten used to seeing him whenever I wanted to." Merek shrugged, knowing that he'd been lucky to spend almost all the time he'd wanted with someone who belonged to one of the councilmen. The pyromancer knew how possessive some of them could be with their slaves. He chuckled a bit, shaking his head. "I can't imagine. I probably would have done quite poorly if I'd made the decision to be a slave instead of staff here." Merek had spent the first twenty years of his life being caged, he'd had little interest in ever going back to that.

[destielshippingnews]

Edvard's Supernatural Guide: 2x01 In My Time of Dying - Addendum

(This is an addendum to my analysis of 2x01 In My Time of Dying, which can be found here.)

Due to my eagerness to get my analysis of 2x01 done and published by my 31st birthday, I neglected to discuss some smaller aspects of the episode. Contributing to this was also the fact that the analysis as published is just over 6,500 words (almost a Bachelor’s dissertation in length) and I did not want to bog it down any more, not to mention the 7,500 word essay on the abuse Dean suffered published the week before. However, as I am taking short break from writing and posting analyses whilst teaching an intensive Finnish course at the Bank of Finland, I have the time to write a shorter postscript to my analysis.

The first thing I wanted to discuss was Dean’s belief that his choices dictate his future. Tessa was a representation of divine will and predestination, or even resignation to the inevitable, and Dean was at odds with her. He believed that if he fought hard enough and refused to give up, he could find a way to return to his body. This is a trait of Dean’s which remains fairly consistent throughout the whole show, a few moments of hopelessness notwithstanding (moments of hopelessness Bobby, Cas, and Sam et al wasted no time chastising him for, but that is a story for another time).

He wanted control of himself and his own life, which is one of the reasons the revelation that God had been dictating his whole life affected him so deeply at the end of series 14. His struggles had been in vain because God had decided for Dean at every possible juncture. The natural end to this narrative arc in 15x19-15x20 should have been God’s defeat and Dean taking the reins of his own life, rather than the insulting mess we actually got. As I have said on many occasions, Dean is suicidal and believes nothing awaits him but a bloody death at a young age. Having him die by indirect suicide (the back wound was treatable) undermined years of Dean fighting for a better future for himself and undermined his own belief that one should always keep going, no matter what.

Dean’s philosophy is absolutely correct: everything we do is a choice, and we have to accept that if we want to be active agents in the world. Buffy Summers summed this up in 2x07 Lie to Me with her statement: You might not have a good choice, but you have a choice to a man forced to choose between dying of brain cancer or becoming a vampire. He was not ‘forced’ by anybody to chose becoming a vampire over death, but rather that was one choice out of several possible choices which he made for himself. I do not want to retype Mark Field’s analysis of this episode of Buffy, so instead I will link this video which discusses this very episode:

Whilst Dean's predicament is not as dire as Ford's was, he chooses not to give in to 'fate', nor to see himself as an object or helpless victim. He chooses to make an impact on his own life and those around him by continuing to fight for as long as he can. Dean is an agent and thereby changes the world around him, simply by accepting and acknowledging his own power as as a human capable of making choices.

Further to the subject of Dean’s beliefs, this episode also presented us with Dean’s false belief that his self-worth is to be found in doing exactly what other people expect and demand of him. Part of this belief is that if other people do not value him, he is not fulfilling their expectations and demands, urging him to therefore strive ever harder to be what other people want him to be.

This belief is evident in Dean shouting at John while Sam visits Bobby. “I have done everything you ever asked, and you’re just going to sit there and watch me die? What the Hell kind of father are you?” Clearly Dean believed (or hoped without belief) that doing what John asked and told him would make John value him and make Dean feel he was worthy of other people.

This is a vicious circle perpetuated by the fact that one’s self-worth is not to be found in ablating oneself and sacrificing one’s own autonomy and self-determination to become a tool in somebody’s toolbox. This false belief is a huge character flaw in Dean, though that is not a criticism of his character. It is entirely understandable and relatable that a son should seek to be worth his father’s pride and admiration, and strive to embody said father’s idea of what a worthy son should be.

John’s death was a huge loss for Dean, as well as a moment of fundamental change. Dean was ever humourless around John, an automaton, but his loss allowed Dean to slowly (very slowly) become more like himself and less like the man John made him be. This is not to say early-years Dean is fake at all, but over the year he allowed himself to enjoy things his father would have disapproved of, and to become more of the person he wanted to be. He gradually learnt (whether consciously or not) that self-worth is not to be found in being what others want, but in being himself around people who accepted him. Sam never accepted Dean for who he was, nor appeared to even understand that his brother was much more than the 2D image Sam had in his mind. Cas, however, did, as did Charlie, Donna, Jody, and even Garth. Dean had worth to them not because he was who they wanted him to be, but because they cared about the people they each were.

Something else I thought worthy of discussion (or contemplation, rather) is how exactly Ghost!Dean interacted with the world. We see him as he was in life, but it is never made clear to the viewer whether this is an accurate representation of being a ghost. It could very well be that ghosts in the Superverse are invisible, disembodied entities walking on the same ground as the living and ultimately experiencing the world in almost the same way as the living. If they have no body, however, then they have no eyes and no way of taking in light to perceive their surroundings. One could argue ‘a wizard did it’, but I am not as content with lazy storytelling as Supernatural is (I hope that does not come back to bite me in the behind when I publish my novel…).

It is possible that a ‘ghost’ is not a disembodied figure or spirit, but rather thoughts, memories, emotions, and experiences on a different plane of existence. If this is the case, then they would not have eyes, ears, or a mouth, and would not interact with the world the same way we do. However, it is possible that such an entity would be able to perceive the brainwaves, heartbeats, and general goings-on of our plane of existence in a way which essentially approximated our senses of sight, sound, touch, smell, and touch.

The fact that Sam as a psychic is able to sense Dean’s presence supports an interpretation like this: as a tiny number of people are able to see infra-red and ultra-violet, Sam can just about detect activity on the spirit plane. Dean’s brainwaves (for want of a better word) in their own plane of existence are able to detect Sam’s, as well as those of everybody around him as well as the location, and he converts it into a form of information he is able to digest and understand. Sam is sensitive to other planes of existence, and so he is able to tap into this and talk to Dean.

It has no bearing on the storytelling, but colours do not exist outside our brain (or eye-sockets), but rather our brains assign colours to different wave-lengths entering our eyes- It is possible that bats’ brains assign different colours to different sounds. If this is true, then bats may hear in colour, meaning that they ‘see’ their surroundings in a way very similar to creatures with eyes, such as us. Ghosts in the Superverse might function similarly, though occasionally they slip through into our plane of existence as psychics such as Sam have some form of access to their plane.

Given this, though the viewer sees Dean in this episode as himself but without a body, this might just be a way of presenting him in a way we can understand, as bats might process sounds with colours. It is also likely that Ghost!Dean interpreted the information he received on the spirit plane in such a way as to envision himself standing in the hospital when in actuality he was pretty much a celestial wavelength of intent.

It is probably best I leave speculation like that here, as I expect the majority of my readership has had enough of it. There were, however, a few other things I wanted to mention before finishing.

Sam showed a side of himself in this episode which really needed to be visible and prominent far more often: that is humility and care for his brother. Despite the fact that his claim that ‘We were just beginning to be brothers again’ is utterly hilarious (they really were not, unless their model for brotherly behaviour was Noel and Liam Gallagher), it was nice to see Sam caring about Dean.

Also rib-tickling was John’s claim that ‘I’ve made some mistakes, but I’ve always done the best I could’, because he most certainly did not do his best. He was on a suicide mission, but he took his children along with him and almost got them killed multiple times. I would have sympathy for John if it were not for the second half of that sentence.

Azazel, however, appears not to know John very well at all, in spite of his overtures at omniscience. “I figured you for many things, but suicidally reckless wasn’t one of them.” If you had only paid attention, Azazel. But as I have said elsewhere, Azazel is a little dumb, as well as hubristic and prideful. He met Dean in 1973 (see episode 4x03 In The Beginning…) and must surely have recognised him in 1x22 Devil’s Trap. He is utterly stupid for making the deal to revive Dean, but as I have said elsewhere, demons in Supernatural are stupid. John said to Azazel “You care a Hell of a lot more about this gun that you do about Dean”, but Azazel knew that Dean would be the one to kill him with the colt. This is why time travel episodes are a bad idea.

One last thing I forgot to mention was that Supernatural is not the first time Jensen and Jim Beaver (Bobby) have been on screen together. Their first time sharing the screen was on 31st October 1997 on an episode of Days of our Lives.Jensen’s character Eric attended the last-minute wedding of his dying father Roman to his ex-wife Marlena before Roman died of AIDS (try convincing me it was not AIDS, I dare you). Jim Beaver played the priest officiating the wedding, which was – predictably – interrupted at the last minute by John et al with the cure for Roman’s AIDS. (It is strange to think that this was very probably the same Hallowe’en I dressed up in a red t-shirt and red tights to be the devil at a Hallowe’en party at my sisters’ Guides’ group. My youngest sister was also three weeks old at the time.)

Thus concludeth this addendum and my analysis of 2x01 In My Time of Dying. I expect my next analysis of 2x02 Everybody Loves a Clown to be ready in two weeks’ time, and I will not be kind to Sam.

[troquantary]

Twilight Reread, Part 0: Thesis Statement

It occurs to me that I never explained what, exactly, I’m hoping to accomplish by rereading the books. I mean, I’ve said I want to reevaluate Bella, but I haven’t told you what my current interpretation of her character is as a starting point. Oops.

The interpretation I want to test is this: 1) Bella’s character parallels Edward’s from the beginning, in that she starts the series depressed, self-loathing, and dismissive of the mundane world around her, only to become swept up in a delusional romantic fantasy that she prioritizes above all else; 2) Bella projects an ideal love interest onto Edward just as much as he projects his ideal onto her, and neither of them ever truly knows the other; 3) Becoming a vampire is the most important thing to Bella, not her relationship with Edward -- but she doesn’t realize that, instead convincing herself that she wants to be a vampire for the purpose of being with Edward rather than for its own sake; 4) By the end of the series, she’s succumbed to the same brand of insanity Edward enjoys and is a much worse person for it.

Basically, I think Meyer’s correct that Edward and Bella are made for each other, but instead of a love story, it’s a tragedy. Bella was always capable of becoming the caring, responsible, practical person she wanted to be, but in pursuing vampirism she cultivates her negative traits rather than the positive ones.

Don’t worry -- I haven’t forgotten that Bella’s only other option, besides turning, was to die horribly. Edward personally ensured that by returning to Forks rather than fuck off to literally anywhere else for a measly year and half, and his own batshit behavior has a caustic effect on Bella’s mental stability.

Bella still has agency in the series, though. While the ultimate outcomes are set in stone per Alice, Bella still makes choices, and a lot of those choices are demented and/or selfishly motivated. Not so much in the beginning -- she’s basically fine in Twilight, but after Edward leaves her in New Moon she never gets back to herself again, instead falling into a moral and mental decline.

Or at least, that’s what I think right now. My opinion might change as I go, and I hope that by the end I can say that whatever my conclusion is, it’s one that I reached through careful, considerate, and critical reading of this sparkly vampire romance for tween girls. 

[kaetchup]

rei sakuma idol story 1

rei's first idol story, and my first real post on tumblr! i know that this one's already localized on engstars, so this one's mostly just ripped from engstars with some minor changes for readability.

♪ obligatory disclaimer! none of this is mine, i'm just sharing it for my love of our idol boys. all content belongs to happy elements ♪

rei: ... ♪

Oh? Well, well, if it isn't our young lady Producer. What could have possibly brought you here? This dormitory should be out of bounds to a lady like you.

A broken taboo in this world induced either divine retribution or direful curses. You may have already invited the devil after you! Kekeke ♪

Yet now is not the time for pleasant vampire chats.

You seem most troubled. Very well, I, Rei Sakuma, shall lend a hand.

I'm always indebted to you, young lady, so allow me to return the favor. Truth be told, demons are much more genuine and earnest than humans.

Hm? Is it inappropriate if I call you "young lady"?

Because the intimacy between producers and idols will leave a negative impression on fans?

Hmm, you are correct. I have yet to fully comprehend the appropriate distance humans keep between each other...

I have, for ages hitherto, considered myself a longer, a beast inhabiting the dark.

But people around me, including you, warmly recieved me as one of your kind...

This is why I can finally breathe fresh air and wear a smile.

Words cannot express my gatefulness. I would do anything for you.

As age has deprived me of all joy except giving allowances to children ♪

Kekeke. It was wrong of me to treat you as a child.

I admit that it is one flaw of mine to treat those around me liek young children.

It proved nowhere near unpleasant back at Yumenosaki Academy.

But now that I have become a part of society...

Suddenly I find myself surrounded by older adults.

Thus I should exercise care and treat everyone as equals.

My sincere gratitude for reminding me, Producer. Please don't hesitate to point out my inadequacies.

... There, there. Don't give me that look, will you? I didn't keep you my audience for nothing.

I have arranged everything on my phone while talking.

As much as I don't like machines, they sure are convenient... What concerns me, on the other hand, is that such comfort brought by out advanced civilization might eventually lead to the degeneration of humanity.

Yet this is in a way evolution as well. Adaptation knows no discrimination.

Change is much more desirable and valuable than stasis.

Kekeke, I see... My investigation has enlightened me on what happened.

The right person fares better than the internet in a time like this.

There was an idol drunk at a banquet who kept whining about not being able to walk...

And you had no choice but to accompany him back to the dorms in a taxi.

I believe such work is more manager than producer...

Could it be that you are too used to undertaking everything by yourself?

It will help if you recognize such a demand as peculiar. However reluctant I am to find fault with anyone for the past...

Idols are no saints. Things might have gone wrong under such circumstances.

How could you possibly tell he was not planning something unforgivable under the pretense of intoxication?

Though you are free to believe that an idol would not do anything that will upset their fans...

Unfortunately, not all people are well-intended. Never had a single second passed without accidents or incidents.

Do take more care of yourself. I would turn over in my grave if something happened to you.

I would most certainly live with indelible regrets until my last breath.

Is it your intention to leave me an eternal scar?

Kekeke. That was a bit harsh of me... You were the one frightened and thus hurt.

I shouldn't utter anything judgemental like that.

You are a smart child, and I am sure that you have learned your lesson with a fright.

Hmm. I will take care of this certain problematic idol.

Even if he meant no harm, even if he inconvenienced you inadvertently... I can't sit by and watch.

I will discipline him. My standing in the industry enables me to do so to whomever he might be.

Well, I hope you are wiser but not sadder after today, and that you get back to work as usual.

Forget about the annoyances... but make sure that they don't happen again.

Pinky promise, then... ♪

Hmm, good girl. I will walk you outside. There is no need to act as though you were a thief about to break a window.

I have cleared our surroundings, so no one would see us.

This way, young lady. I will take you to safety... ♪

...

... See? You should pay attention to what I'm saying. You cannot possibly read my mind-

What if I, like the devil, were to harm you?

If you let your guard down like this, there is no promise that I wouldn't sink my teeth into you from behind...

As someone who nearly paid for your kindness, you really should be more suspicious of others.

Well, I presume this is your virtue. How sad it would be if we should start to suspect everybody...

Innocence is never a sin.

But do please remember this much- we idols love you, and we are concerned about you.

I, not as a colleague, but as an individual human being, pray for your happiness.

For our sake, please take care of yourself.

Very well. Let's end such heavy talk if you have kept my words in mind.

Return to where you belong. I will escort you as long as you wish.

Now then, Producer... Enjoy your walk with the vampire on this beautiful, serene night ♪

[petpluto]

Here’s my rambling incoherent thoughts on this.

I think the first 5 seasons of Buffy the Vampire Slayer are solid. They are, for me, the pinnacle of television. I got your prestige tv right here, and I won’t be swayed from that. I know season 4 has its detractors and I understand them, but I think the show and its philosophy is fairly uninterrupted during the WB years. The show feels complete for me here in ways that it doesn’t recapture during the UPN years. There is a good balance between the Real World and the Supernatural World in those seasons for me, and the human characters still feel integral to the, for lack of a better word, soul of the show in ways that aren’t true for me in seasons 6&7. Seasons 1 - 5, are, for me, structurally the better show.

Season 6 is a complex issue for me that I’m not going to get into here, but it didn’t gel with me or with season 5 in ways I needed it to. And season 7 meandered and stalled and stopped as the writers tried to figure out which characters and storylines had spin off potential. For me, these seasons feel tonally separate from what came before, and not as tight. Structurally, I don’t consider these seasons to be as good. I think there was a BtVS-quality show to be found, and it was still better than most tv and had some of the best episodes of the series. And some of the best episodes of television, period. However, the writing didn’t capture all of what I loved previously, and that allowed for a lot of what I would have previously forgiven to become problems for me.

That being said, the way season 7 ends, the way the series ends, is absolutely needed. Season 5 ends the series where Buffy was a good slayer, potentially the best slayer, but not a world shattering figure. Season 7 ends with Buffy being the transformative figure she always was in the series and beyond it. The series always should have ended the way it did. Buffy should have always shattered the system to create something more egalitarian and less prone to exploitation. Buffy, who aligns herself so fully with girlhood and womanhood, should share her power to untold numbers of girls and women. It is answer to the philosophical question the show posited from the beginning, and it is ultimately a better ending for Buffy the character (she gets to live!) and Buffy the series, than season 5’s.

I personally just wish seasons 6 & 7 in their totality buttressed that ending better. When people say they wish the show ended in season 5, I think they’re speaking structurally rather than philosophically. I wish the story had been more coherent. That the choices explored were more in that vein. I wish the Big Bad of season 6, or part of season 7, was The Watcher’s Council itself. I wish that we didn’t spend so much time in season 6 showing how Buffy had difficulty operating in the Real World with so little payoff in season 7. I know some of this was writer correction and some of it was backstage drama, and I enjoy some of the “misogyny is the real evil” story told in season 6. But instead of just 3 solitary pre-incel label jerks being Buffy’s problem, make it the misogyny that trapped her and girls like her in an unpaid “sacred duty” position until their death. The story could have been stronger - payoff could have been better - if the show had dealt with the structures they had built upon from the start. Buffy deserved to be the person who broke the chains of the slayer lineage; but she also deserved to have the show wrestle with those chains in ways it never managed to do.

btw idk how you could watch Buffy’s sad, heartbroken, hopeless monologue in Prophesy Girl and then believe her story should have ended with her death and the Slayer cycle remaining entirely unchanged. Some opinions are bad i think.

[the-sprog]

So since I'm very bad at remembering my ideas, I'm gonna throw this out there and hope one day I'm like "WAIT didn't I have an idea for a fic??? What was it???" And I will find it on my tumblr.

It's about Danny Phantom, obviously.

There are actually two of them in here so:

The easiest one: Jack and Maddie are not stupid. I mean they're scientists, the use the scientific method. One of the things about the scientific method is that if you do a bunch of tests, based on an hypothesis and only one of them comes out disproving it, then your hypothesis is incorrect.

Phantom has disproved basically all of their hypothesis.

So, next thing to do? Create a new one. Do new tests. They take Jazz's suggestion and try and see if the ghosts of Amity are actually conscious. Because obviously they're sentient, but are they like animals? Or are they like robots with artificial intelligence?

Or even better yet, are they like humans?

They grab Phantom's attention and ask him if he would cooperate for this test. A simple Turing test. Obviously they're still wary because of everything that happened with him, and do the test with witnesses to keep both Phantom's and their minds at ease.

He passed the test. With flying colors.

They're shocked and ask him if he knew peaceful ghosts that would be willing to take the test (because, y'know. Scientific method. Need to try over and over again). Phantom would have to explain that not all ghosts are as human-like as him (as, first of all, he's a halfa, but he doesn't say that. And second, lots of them are blobs or animal-like ghosts), but cue his parents meeting Jhonny and Kitty (cause I like the idea that they have a truce with Phantom and that going out of the zone helps them with their couple problems), as well as Shadow (example of a less human-like ghost). Then Sidney, Dora, the Fright Knight (cause king ghost Danny ftw) and Frostbite.

They all pass, more or less. Some, like Dora, the light and Sidney, where given away by their choice of word, but other than that all of them passed the test.

OK SO MORE COMPLEX ONE:

I love crossovers. I love finding ways of putting the two universes together, of making them work with each other, adapting the rules so that they apply to both. (With Danny Phantom it's also really cool to just... Make him travel the multiverse. He doesn't adhere to the rules of where he goes to, so it's always hilarious. But we're not here for that now).

One of the best ones to do this with is My Hero Academia. Whenever a show has someone with powers I end up asking myself "how should that work in the world of my hero?" And start trying to incorporate it in the lore.

So, first thing first, we're getting rid of the canon story of my hero. Completely unrelated to the show. This takes place decades in the past, when the first people where developing quirks (so if I wanted to write something with this and actually use my hero characters, I'd make it so that they where hit with a time traveling quirk or that Clockwork was somehow involved).

The Fenton's hatred for ghosts? Make it discrimination against the people who have quirks.

Danny being half-ghost? His quirk's fault. He calls it Ghost, for simplicity, it allows him to come back as a sort of ghost-like creature after he dies. Somehow, one day, he doesn't die completely so his body fixes it the only way it know how. Making him partially ghost.

Obviously that would mean that all the ghosts he fights aren't ghosts anymore. They're villains with quirks, and their powers would be based on what they can do on the show, minus the basic intangibility, invisibility and flight.

Obviously only Sam and Tucker would know he was Phantom and he had a quirk, he's also kinda the only one in town with one. People would be a little racist against quirk havers, but the kids, like in the show, come around to it. And actually start loving Phantom and thinking of him as a hero.

How do I fit Vlad in all of this? Ehm ahhhh this is the one thing I didn't think about. Very basic, but could give him a power similar to Danny, were instead of a ghost, he becomes a vampire. But his quirk is caused by an accident in college, so it's artificial.

Why does Skulker (who doesn't have a quirk. He's just a guy in a suit) hunt Danny? He has a very unique quirk.

Does Dani exist? I mean. Yeah. Cloning is not so farfetched, especially with the existence of quirks.

Clockwork can control time, he involuntary does that being a child, then an adult then an old man thing. The Observants are people without quirks that keep him in check, an organization that made a pact with him to stay young forever or something in change of idk what. No idea what Clockwork would get out of it I won't lie. Money maybe? Or somehow they found a way of keeping him there against his will?

Walker (and I'll make a seperate post about this) is an ex guy in white. Yes they still exist, but they hunt quirk havers instead of paranormal stuff. Walker was kicked out because he actually has a quirk but lied about it. He's after his own kind in the show as well. I mean, he's a stickler to the rules, but he only ever seems to care when it's ghosts that brake them. Correct me if I'm wrong, but never has he punished a human. His quirk is making semi-sentient minions. They're not copies of himself. They're like clay humans with basic forms. They all look alike and have no special characteristics.

Frostbite is just... A yeti. With cryokenisis. It's a mutation type quirk.

Same goes for Wulf, he's just a humanoid wolf that can create teleportation portals. I can't think of a reason why he would only speak Esperanto though. It could be something similar to Five from umbrella academy. He accidentally got stuck in the 1600 as a kid and managed to come back only relatively recently.

I feel like all the other ghosts have obvious powers.

Cujo can become ginormous,

Technus can control technology,

Dora and Aragon can become dragons,

Jhonny gives people bad luck and can control his shadow,

Kitty can make man disappear,

Ember can mind control using music,

Spectra can use people's negative emotions to stay young,

Bernard has shapeshifting,

Youngblood can't be seen by adults (side effect: can't grow old) and his sideckick has a variant of shapeshifting where he can only transform in animals. A definitive father figure),

Box ghost can control boxes,

Pandora can control the plagues of the world,

Desiré can make people's wishes come true,

Sidney can swap bodies with people,

Undergrowth can control plants,

Pariah Dark- I... Actually don't know...

Lunch Lady can control food,

Aaaanndddd no more come to mind.

I want to do something with this AU but I can't really think of an interesting story, other than "kids from 1A get misplaced in time and Danny has to help, discovering the existence of Clockwork and the Observants, whom he hates. So he tries to get Clockwork out of there with the other kid's help" but that's it, really.

I actually have a 3rd idea, but it basically works the same as the MHA one. Crossover with the X-Men.

Substitute quirk havers with mutants and quirks with mutations and you get the idea.

The plot would be more of a "Danny gets recruited by Xavier after the trauma of almost dying activated his mutation and goes to live at the mansion. This happens after the events of season 3, alla salted to make sense in the world of Marvel, but without Phantom planet. He makes friends there, since Sam and Tucker aren't with him and everything is fine and dandy and happy. Until it comes out that the Fentons actually contribute to the creation of the Sentinels, because they hate Phantom that much.

So Danny has to infiltrate his own family to get info on how the Sentinels work so they can destroy them, since his parents are still oblivious and they made it so that the Sentinels wouldn't attack Danny thinking that his accident just somehow make him register as a mutant on machinery" and that's it.

[morning-might-arrive]

Here’s the continuation of my last post. Thank you so much to everyone who liked and reblogged! This is becoming a lot longer than I thought, so there will be another part soon. Feedback is appreciated!

A series of misunderstandings involving a limousine and Spectra’s blog lead Jackson to the realization that he has way more friends than he thought.

Wednesday

Jackson sighed as he silenced his blaring alarm clock. 7:00 am. As he walked to the bathroom to get ready, he was suddenly struck by a memory.

“It’s nothing personal, normie. You just look like such a freak.” Manny told him as he shoved him off of the lunch table. Jackson looked towards the other mansters, but they said nothing. So they all agreed. Even Clawd. 

He cringed. He’d had to eat lunch in a bathroom stall that day. He looked at his reflection, desperately wishing he could change it. He sighed and got dressed. He had to leave early since he now had no car and his parents weren't home. He plugged his headphones into his phone. Holt had gotten them into this situation, only fitting that he deal with it.

Holt Hyde cursed under his breath as he walked to school. Although the weather was warming, mornings in March were still frigid. He sighed in relief as he approached Monster High.

“Heya there, sweetpea,” Operetta drawled in greeting as Holt waltzed through the front doors of the school. 

“What’s good, Oppy?” Holt responded, his usual loud and energetic self even at the early hour.

“Just peachy keen like always, hun. Say, you seen the Ghostly Gossip lately?” She asked.

“Nah, we usually stay away from that garbage ever since that story about us and Frankie. Humiliated the poor ghoul and almost tanked our relationship. It really ain’t cool what they're doin’.” He replied nonchalantly. 

“Oh. Okay. Well sugar, you know you can tell me anythang you wanna, right?” She continued.

“Uh, yeah, sure. Thanks Oppy.” That was kinda weird for the rough and tumble ghoul to say, but honestly Holt was just glad their botched attempt at dating didn’t mess up their friendship. Oppy was a cool ghoul. 

“What’s the word, cool cats?” Came a new voice.

“Johnny!”

“Johnny.”

Johnny spirit sauntered casually down the main corridor of Monster High, and students jumped out of his way as if he had the plague. He put his arm around Operetta’s shoulder. “Hey, babe.”

Holt snorted. “I’ll never get why everyone lets you float around like you own the place.”

Johnny shrugged. “Guess they don’t have a choice. Besides, I never see you doing anything about it,” he replied with a bit of challenge in his tone. Holt rolled his eyes.

“You know you don’t scare us, Spirit. Anyway, it seems like Oppy’s got you on a leash without our help.”

Johnny bristled at that “Y’know Hyde, I’m gettin’ real sick of-”

“Why don’t we scamper on down to the catacombs and finish that new song we been workin on, sugarpie?” Operetta cut in. She really didn’t want to deal with a fistfight this early.

The couple walked away and Holt made toward the auditorium. He found the symphony on stage setting up and dashed up to join them, plugging his guitar into its amp. Jennifire was nearby greasing the corks on her clarinet. He huffed and sat down next to her.

“Another run in with the phantom pianist?” She asked, not even looking up.

“That guy is such a jerk!”

She chuckled and shook her head. “You boys are so easily provoked; I may never understand it. My brothers were just the same. He has done not to insight your anger.”

Holt really hated to admit it, but she was right. Johnny really didn't scare Holt, and he knew a little better than to try that tough guy act on Jackson. Plus, it was kinda funny seeing guys like Heath and Manny faint when he walked past them.

“Your emotions run like wildfire, I am very impressed you came to terms so easily with your end.” She continued.

Wait. What. “My what now?”

“Of course, it must be so hard for you to talk about. I am sorry.” A tear fell from her eye and promptly turned to smoke upon hitting her face.

“Jen, are you okay?” Holt asked, facing her.

She smiled. “Yes, I will be okay. So kind of you to think of me.”

“Okay, Okay, enough chit chat. Places people!” The director yelled as he approached the stage. Well. That was weird. Holt took his place in the stool beside the amp and looked up as the director began counting them off.

After an awkward hour of rehearsal, they were dismissed to second period. Holt emerged out into the crowd of students in the hall. Jennifire was nowhere to be found, so he made his way toward the art room. His Spotify playlist suddenly changed to a song by Pierce the Veil. He pulled out his phone to skip it and saw he had a message from Jackson. He scoffed. If D-low had told him what was wrong, would he be asking? JJ could be so oblivious. Maybe it was just a normie thing. 

He took his usual seat in front of his canvas and continued his painting for this week. 

“Psst, Holt.” he heard a whisper. He turned and met the shiny magenta eyes of retired popstar Catty Noir. “We’re turning up at Cleo’s place on Saturday, you in?”

“Yeah totally- oh, nevermind. We can’t make it, we kinda got a...thing that day.”

“Oh,” she said, looking kind of taken aback. “It’s that soon?” 

“What was that?”

“ I said I’ll see you soon!” she hastily corrected herself as she got up and turned in her painting, promptly leaving the art room. Man, everyone's acting off today. He touched up his work and quickly followed suit.

He basically had the rest of the period to himself, so he decided to riff on his guitar for a little bit. He couldn’t do it in the building anymore ever since that one time Headmistress Bloodgood caught him, so he moved to the front steps and set his bag beside him.

“Hey Holt!”

Holt turned towards the front of the school. “Frankie Fine-Stein! Where have you been hiding?” Her skin glowed a light mint green and her eyes sparked in the sun. Just as bootiful as ever. She sat on the step beside him.

“I was actually just in the library. I found this book about the original Jekyll and Hyde. It was way harsh; It said that Edward Hyde trampled a child in the streets of London, is that true?”

“Nuh-uh! Those stuffy normie’s didn’t like that grandpa’s were different so they dragged their reputation through the dirt!” Holt declared passionately. “Some of the people they charged him with killing didn’t even exist in the first place! Then they made Dr. Jekyll out to be a complete basket case and threw them both in jail! That is until they got bailed out by our great-great-grandma, Lucy.”

“Oh, man. I didn’t know any of that!” Frankie replied. She actually knew all about it, she had heard the exact same thing from Jackson before. They were both incredibly salty about the smear campaign launched against their great-great-grandparents that made their family flee to America in the first place, and you could hardly bring it up around them without a passionate rant. Frankie felt a little bad about bringing up something she knew was a sore subjet for them, but she had to make sure Spectra and the other ghouls didn’t get caught. It was for their own good, right?

Her phone buzzed in her lap and she glanced down. “Spectra got something, meet us back in the library.” Clawdeen. Frankie jumped up. “Sorry, Holt, I really gotta go.”

Holt watched her go in curiosity. He checked the time and quickly jumped up himself and dashed back inside the building. The only way to not be late now was to go through Section C, the so-called “vampires only” hallway. It really irked them when other monster’s used it, but he didn’t really care when it was either that or detention. As he made his way through he felt someone glaring at him, and met eyes with a large group of the former prep-school vampires. He braced himself, but instead of giving him grief like they usually did, they just let him pass. They were acting weird, but so was everyone else. Oh well, he didn’t really have time to think about it now.

Holt’s third period was Chemistry 2 with Mr. Hack. No thanks. Science was never his strong suit. Plus, there was seriously something off about this particular teacher. He just took a little too much pleasure in the cutting open of living things for Holt’s liking. He pulled out his phone.

“Keep an eye out. Today’s been weird, Bro.” He typed the message out and then disconnected his phone from his headphones. The world went dark.

Jackson blinked a few times. What was that ringing sound? “Oh, shOOT!” He bolted through the closest door- which just happened to be the right one- and took his seat as the bell finished ringing.

Mr. Hack passed out a hefty amount of worksheets to the class. “Okay class: no whispering, no talking, no looking around, no coughing or sneezing, no you can’t use the bathroom, and if I catch you on your cell phone the whole class gets detention. You have until the end of the class to complete the worksheets or it's a 0 for today.”

Everyone groaned. Good old Mr. Hack. Charming and likeable. Jackson tried to ignore the stares and whispers in his direction as he did his work. He knows he’s different, don’t they ever get tired of reminding him? Were they all paying more attention to him than usual, or was it just his imagination? He blazed through his work in about 20 minutes, it was just some simple thermodynamics equations. He looked up and noticed that Mr. Hack was asleep. Typical. Half the class were on their phones and the other half were talking amongst themselves. He pulled his phone out and saw Holt’s message.

Huh. Maybe it wasn’t just his imagination then, everyone was acting a little odd. Granted, every day at Monster High was pretty weird. Last week they had lost their school crest in a rollerblading contest and the school nearly toppled over, so maybe he could just ignore whatever this was.

The bell finally rang for lunch. He set his work on Mr. Hack’s desk as he jolted awake and practically ran from the room. He shot Clair a text

“Okay, transportation is set and decorations bought. Am I forgetting anything?”

“Measurements, goofy.” She responded almost instantly.

“Oh, right. I can get a tape measure from the woodshop teacher and get them during lunch.”

“Have you told the other monsters about Saturday?”

“No. I just don’t know how they’ll react, y’know?”

“Aren’t they always telling you about how you don’t belong? So why would they care?”

“Yeah you’re probably right. It’s just a difficult situation.”

“Yeah, I hear you. Let me know how it goes.”

Looking down at his phone, he didn’t notice Draculara until he bumped her as he passed.

“So sorry!” He exclaimed. 

“It’s alright.” She reassured him as she walked away. She made her way to the library where her friends were already gathered around in a circle. Spectra floated in the center.

“What’s this all about?” Draculara asked.

“While Frankie had Holt distracted, Spectra looked in his locker.”

“Well what did she find?” Cleo demanded.

“Just this. It appears to be a receipt for some kind of car rental.”

Clawd glanced at his phone. “Heath says Jackson is in the boys locker room right now taking measurements of himself and writing them down.” He told the group.

“Then what Spectra said is true.” Fraknie finally admitted. The room fell into extended silence.

“Well we can at least show Jackson he means something to us.” Draculara spoke up.

“Yeah,” Frankie agreed, “we can do something nice for him and Holt.”

“What are we going to do? Hijack the gym and throw a huge party during lunch?” Cleo asked sardonically.

“You’re on a roll Cleo! It’ll be closed tomorrow, but we can do it Friday!” Clawdeen agreed.

Cleo smiled. Very well then. Friday would be a day for the monster history books.

[knight-queen]

Lunatic Parade Subaru Sakamaki– (Chapter 3)

[Chapter 1] [Chapter 2]

Place: Glimmer Street, Main street/グリンマーストリート 表通り

Subaru: Haah...I wonder what that old-uncle’s planning to assign us this time.

Yui: According to what I feel... I bet we won’t be facing any ordinary things this time too…

(Hm…?)

Vampire Woman E: Haah...it’s no good…

Yui: (That grandmom seems to be troubled by something….? Why’s that?)

→ Selection

声をかける / Call her out (+Correct)

そのまま通り過ぎる/ Pass it as it is

Yui: Excuse me, grandmo一

Subaru: Oi.

Yui: Subaru kun…

Subaru: Don’t tell me that ye’re gonna call her out?

Yui: Eh...Yes, I am…

Subaru: Are you awaring of this situation? We have to go somewhere important.

Yui: I know that but...we can’t just leave someone alone who’s been troubled…

Subaru: What you mean by troubled…

……

...Haah, got it. Do as you wish.

...Kindness is existing inside you as always.

Yui: Umm...excuse me grandmom, is there anything wrong?

Vampire Woman E: Oh...a girl. You see, I have dropped off a precious handkerchief somewhere…

Yui: So that’s what it was. I’m going to lay you a hand searching for that!

Subaru: Bah dang….that’s the only option…

*After a moment*

Yui: (It’s rather difficult to search for a handkerchief without having any clue…)

Subaru: Oi, I couldn’t find it here.

Yui: Likewise...I couldn’t find it either.

(Was that flew away somewhere by wind…? 一Ah!)

The thing stuck with that bench over there, it’s the handkerchief yeah!?

Vampire Woman: Oh goodness! You’re right!

Subaru: Finally found that huh? Well then, let’s get that an一

*A bird has grabbed that*

Yui: Ah…!

(That bird has….!)

Subaru: Wai- hold on!

*Flying sound*

Yui: (The bird picked the handkerchief in it’s mouth and flew away…)

Subaru: Tch...on the roof huh…

Yui: ...I’m gonna bring a ladder right away…!

Subaru: Aah, hold it! For you using a ladder will probably be so risky that I can’t even look at that.

...I’ll go and get that so wait ‘re.

I won’t need any kinda ladder for just this...I can get that in a sec’ if I just fly.

...Here I go…

*Flies*

Yui: ...Ah, Subaru kun…

*Comes back after a moment*

Subaru: ...Here, it should be fine now.

Yui: (Ah, the thing he’s holding is…!)

Vampire Woman E: Oh my, yes! This one! Huge thanks to both of you.

This thing was really important for me...so you were a great help. Really thank you very much.

(She is being so happy. It was good to her after all!)

Yui: Ah...sorry Subaru kun for making you stop by there...but thank you.

Subaru: ...Haah. Every time I see the depth of yer’ kindness, it keeps surprising me…

...But, you know...if you prefer that then I won’t stop you.

Yui: Yes…?

(He’d usually say that doing these is just absurd but...he’s somehow different I guess)

Subaru: Anyways, we’re done with this business. Let’s move on.

Place: Rubean Canal / ルビーン運河

Gondolier A: 一Time to departure!

Yui: (...Today’s work is to find a mineral from an abandoned mine inside of the volcano.)

(...Sounds so difficult…)

Subaru: Oi, what was up with that guy from earlier?

Yui: Eh? The guy from earlier?

Subaru: When I said “let’s go”, then you were freaked out. That one.

Yui: Oh…

(The time when he said that today we’ll have to go to the volcano…)

(I thought Subaru kun is gonna deny but, he simply nodded by saying “Let’s go”...)

Ah...yeah. I want you to listen without getting angry…

I really thought that you’re gonna have an objection in going to the volcano.

However, I was surprised when you smoothly agreed with going there…

Subaru: ...Hmph.

...Even though I can’t understand other people, every single one has a precious thing.

Atleast, I understood that right.

Yui: ……?

Subaru: Such as, the head-mask that the old-uncle asked to get and,

The handkerchief that the grandma was searching.

Yui: Subaru kun…

Subaru: Above these...if I look from the perspectives of persons, then to me you are also…

So, they may have looked at those things considering like this way.

Yui: ...kh…*flushed*

(It’s unfair to say these things out of nowhere…)

(It’s embarrassing but...I feel like my love for Subaru has increased more than before.)

Place: Lake / 湖

Gondolier A: This place is Tilkes!

Yui: (Phew...looks like we’ve finally arrived.)

(Rest is to go to the volcano right ahead…)

Subaru: Finally we’ve come here huh…

Yui: I guessed you’d prefer flying instead of riding on Gondola.

Subaru: Yeah...I had thought about flying. But, I’ll have to use some stamina from here on, yeah?

Yui: (Fufu...looks like he’s having positive feedback in the missions that Mr. antique-artist has assigned.)

*After a while*

Yui: Certainly we can see the volcano if we pass by this lake-side, right?

Subaru: That old-uncle said so.

Yui: Well then if we take this direct approac一

*Crowd noises*

Yui: ……

Subaru: ……

Yui: (I’ve been thinking about it for a while though, this lake-shore is full of couples I seeee….)

(Since it looks like a tourism spot, I think we’ve no other choices…)

S- so many couples right…

Subaru: Tch...dang noisy…

Yui: (But, if we don’t cross through this side-road of couples then we can’t go to the volcano….)

Subaru: Oi, Yui.

*Hugs her*

Yui: Wah…!

(He is hugging me…!?)

Subaru: It won't be unnatural if we just walk together like this.

Yui: Maybe you got a point but still...it’s embarrassing…!

Subaru: Looking to the other side, we’re also....two of us will also be considered like that way. *blushing*

Don’t worry about it. Let’s go.

Yui: M- mhm…

Place: Front of Mine Entrance / 鉱山跡地入口前

Yui: L- looks like that’s the entrance.

Stallkeeper near Volcano: 一Please wait up there.

Subaru: Yeah?

Stallkeeper near Volcano: Are you going to enter there?

Subaru: If we do, then what?

Stallkeeper near Volcano: Oh, it’s nothing...if so, then you should take this.

Yui: This is...marshmallow…?

But... Why do we need this for getting inside this volcano…?

Stallkeeper near Volcano: To be honest...there’s a certain story behind this land-area.

Yui: Story…

Monologue 一

一一Thus, we’ve ended up hearing a sorrowful story about the Smaragd Volcano.

Long time ago...the resources of this volcano were so abundant that the mineral-mining was just being continued. 

One day...a man who was working there fell in love with Reis who lives in the underground lake. 

It was rather unusual story as Reis and Vampire to become lovers, however in order to live with Reis, 

That man has deceived a vampire woman and gave her body to his beloved.

It’s because...unless Reis isn’t possessed by some person, she cannot leave that area where she was living. 

But she was binded with the fate of getting erased away if she leaves that place.

Despite not for being used to that, those two were spending happy days together.

The only one thing that Reis appreciated in her life as a Vampire was...marshmallow.

...However, that happiness didn’t continued to last long.

One day, the main owner of the body that Reis had possessed over got awakened and 一一

Ended up killing the man.

Reis who was shivering in anger had killed the woman whose body she had taken over and relied on at that time…

As a result, she disappeared…

That man is wandering around the volcano to find his beloved Reis even now...

Reis’s comrades had also cherished her choices, so they also made themselves to like marshmallows...

End of Monologue

Yui: ……

(There’s such a painful story behind this volcano…)

Subaru: Hmph, overall you just mean that we’ll have to give this sweet stuff to Reis if she shows up, yeah?

It’s just a myth. How absurd....

*Subaru walks away*

Yui: Ah, wait up, Subaru kun…!

(As he said, maybe it’s just a myth but…)

Umm...sorry, but is it okay to take this marshmallow just for advancement?

Stallkeeper near Volcano: Ofcourse. I just pray that you two don’t have to face Reis.

Yui: Thank you very much.

(Aight, let’s catch up with Subaru kun then…!)

Place: 鉱山跡地 / Mining area

Yui: (Where did Subaru kun head out…?)

(I didn’t predict that he’d go so far away…)

Subaru: 一 I knew.

*Screen slightly shakes*

Yui: Wah, Subaru kun!?

I got... freaked out as you suddenly showed up…

Subaru: In anycase, it’s for you. Before coming here, you got that marshmallow, right?

I have been waiting ‘re when I thought so.

Yui: I- I see…

Subaru: Did you really believe that story to be true?

It was just a childful-trick to make you buy that for sure.

Yui: Maybe you’re right...but just in case...okay?

Subaru: ...Haah.

Well, it’s fine. Let’s start searching for the mineral.

Yui: He told us to get the mineral which has a blue-shining on it.

Subaru: Yeah, he said we can find that...if we search the bare rocks of this place.

Looks like there’s a... mining-tool just in the perfect place.

*Takes that tool*

Subaru: I’m gonna cut off this wall using this, so you better look for that mineral.

Yui: Yes, I’ll do my best...!

*After a while*

Subaru: Ah...haah...ha…

Yui: (Uh...We’ve been searching quite a lot but we’re not finding that…)

(I don’t think that we’ll be able to find that at all…)

(And also…)

*Wind blows*

Yui: (Perhaps it’s for the story of Reis we’d heard before...I’m ending up feeling a bit creepy.)

???: Hehe...ehehehe…

Yui: ...kh, who was she…?

*Wind blows more deeply*

Yui: (No one’s here…)

(Was it an illusion of my mind….? But I can sure say there’s someone here…)

Subaru: Oi, what’s wrong?

Yui: Ah...Subaru kun...I have been feeling creepy for some reason…

Subaru: ...Well, this place is bad.

Yui: Yes…

Subaru: ...We shall have a rest for once. You have something to eat, no?

Yui: Ah...yeah! On the way to come here, I bought some sandwiches.

...Here, this is your part!

Subaru: Oh...thank you.

*After a moment*

Yui: Fu...it was yummy.

(This place is creepy indeed but it’s a bit fun since it looks like a picnic…)

...I should have brought some desserts with me.

Subaru: Yeah? But we do have dessert.

Yui: Eh?

Subaru: You got some at the entrance...the marshmallows.

Yui: Are you gonna eat that!? We should save it for the time if we meet Reis…

Subaru: Bah, but I told ya’ that it’s just a myth, didn’t I?

Yui: I wonder…

(Well but...it’s better to eat it instead of wasting it away by throwing…)

Wait a little…

*Checks out for the marshmallows*

Yui: Huh…

Subaru: Oi, what now?

Yui: I couldn’t see any marshmallow…

Subaru: Hmm. I think you’ve dropped it somewhere on your way?

Yui: ………

(Now...could it be Reis has taken that way…)

(If she did then it was good to buy that marshmallow following the advice of that stall keeper….)

Subaru: ...What’s wrong? Did you want to eat marshmallow so bad?

Yui: Ah...nope. It’s not that…

(Let’s not talk about it to Subaru kun….)

(Since I can’t confirm that Reis has taken that away…)

(Even if that story is true, I better not drag myself into it.)

Subaru: …? What a weirdo. Let’s go back to our work right away.

*Time skip*

Subaru: ...kh, Haahh…!

Yui: Subaru kun, you see anything…?

Subaru: Not at all...instead I’ve found some kind of extraordinary thing but,

It’s not the thing that Old-Uncle asked for…

Look, this one.

Yui: Waah, it’s such a beautiful gem.

(If I look at this at an angle then the color changes to another! Incredible…!)

(But the thing we’re aiming for is not this one…)

Subaru: ………

Yui: (He’s just keeping watching this stone he’s holding…)

Fufu...if you like it then what about taking it home as a memory?

Since it’s an unusual gem!

Subaru: O- Oh...right.

Yui: And...what should we do next…

(At this rate, even if we search it aimlessly, it will basically be pointless…)

???: Hehe...ehehehe…

Yui: ...kh…!

(This voice...is the same from before…!)

(I knew that the truth’s Reis exist….? What should we do since we don��t have marshmallows with us…)

Subaru: ...Someone’s voice.

Yui: You noticed that too...?

Subaru: Yeah. It was coming from our back right?

Yui: Yes…let’s go to the direction where the voice came from.

*After a moment*

Subaru: ...was that coming from ‘re…?

Recalling that, I had read a fairy-tale of the Lower World when I was a child…

It was written that by digging the place where a pet-dog barked, one can find treasures.

You know about that?

Yui: Eh? Y- yes...It was a common story…

Subaru: There’s a chance that….it’s gonna work for this thing too…!

...Let’s try it out by digging here.

*Digs*

...GGh….!

Yui: Ah! Look Subaru kun!! It’s this stone, right…!?

Subaru: Certainly...it’s blue exactly like that Old-Uncle said…

Yui: Waah! That’s a great relief that we find it, right!

Subaru: Haah...Jeez, finally huh…

But...it was worthwhile to work damn hard searching for it…

Yui: Right.

(Hm…? Then Reis’s voice from earlier…? Could it be that she told us the clue as thanks for giving her the marshmallow…)

Subaru: We’ve managed to get the gem safely so let’s get out.

Yui: Sure一

*Bird’s buzzing sound*

Subaru: Aah…?

Yui: This…. Sound…?

*Eagle rudely whistling sound*

Yui: Eh...Eagle…!?

Subaru: HAAAH!? Where did this shit come from!? ….No way….it’s coming this way…!

*Whistling*

Subaru: ...kh! Watch out…!!

*Screen shakes*

Yui: Are you okay!?

(Now...the eagle is after the gem that Subaru kun’s holding…?)

Subaru: Oi, oi! Could it be that it's aiming at this stone?

No way we'll handle it over after getting it with so much effort!

Let’s hurry and escape!

*After*

*Eagle whistling*

Subaru: Chhe...it’s still chasing after us!

Yui: Ah, Subaru kun! There’s a minecart over there…!

Subaru: Only option is to use that for escape huh���!

*Timeskip + Gets on minecart*

Subaru: Oi, take care of this gem.

Yui: (Let’s put it inside my pocket in such a way it won’t fall…)

Subaru: kh...mo...ve!!

*Sound*

Subaru: Aight, it started to move!

Is that giant-eagle still chasing?

*Eagle whistling*

Yui: Yes...As expected, she’s wanting to get this gem…

Subaru: Tch...fuck that old-uncle! I didn’t hear him say for such a bird to exist here…!

*Eagle whistling*

Yui: Ah…! Subaru kun, it’s no good…!

Subaru: Damn it all…! Oi, you bend downward. Don’t raise yer’ face up no matter what.

Yui: Ye- yes…

Subaru: Tch...behave yer’self! Play outta somewhere else!

*Subaru picks up a tool*

Yui: Subaru kun! Don’t overdo it that much…!

Subaru: Yeah, I know…! ….Uaaah…!?

*Punch*

Yui: Ehh…!?

(The giant-eagle has….grasped Subaru kun…!?)

Subaru: ...ghh...Oi, lemme go…!!

*Eagle whistles*

Subaru: ...gh!!

Yui: Ah…!!

Subaru: Yuiii…!!

Yui: No way...Subaru kun!?

(He is going in the ravine-bottom…!! I gotta go there to help him...but how can I…)

*Screen vibrates*

Yui: Wh- what was that now…!? Rumble in the ground…?

*Screen shakes*

Yui: Eh…!

(This minecart is going to tilt...at this rate I’m gonna fall…!?)

...kh...Kyaaa…!?

*BG turns black*

Yui: (Wh-what should I do...it’s means, before getting back my heart, I am going to…)

(......)

Subaru: 一Yui!

Yui: (Eh…?)

(My body is...floating…?)

Subaru...kun…?

It’s fine now, hold me tight!

Yui: Yes…!

Place: 洞窟 / Cave

Yui: Haah...haah…

Somehow...we’re saved…?

Subaru: Aah...looks so.

Yui: (But...which place is this? As what I’m seeing, it’s a cave though…)

...kh…

(What…!? It hurts to...breath…!)

Subaru: Tch...looks like... we rather fall right into the underground…

We gotta leave...before we get choked…!

Place: 地底湖 / Underground Lake

Subaru: Haah...Oi, you...okay?

Yui: Somehow yes…!

(There’s even a lake in the underground…)

Subaru: Oi, are you having that gem with you?

Yui: Yeah, no worries. It’s safe.

Subaru: Good...let’s get outta here then.

That’s gonna be a trouble if we get dragged into something again.

From here on…

...Don’t you ever leave my side again. We don’t know what’s gonna come up next.

Yui: Yes…!

*Screen shakes*

Subaru: ...gh, hold it. Something’s...coming…

Yui: (This sound...don’t tell me it’s the same ground-rumble again…!?)

*Water sound*

Subaru: ...Water…!?

Yui: Ah...perhaps the lake got overflowed because of that rumble in the ground…

Subaru: Fuck...one after another…!

Yui: Kyaaah!?

(I am gonna be swept away…!?)

Subaru: Oi, hold me!!

*Subaru gets closer*

Subaru: Don’t let go of this hand no matter what!

*BG black + after a moment*

Yui: (I was...saved…?)

*Fades to CG*

Yui: *coughs*.... *coughs*....

Subaru: Oi...you okay?

Yui: Ah...yes. I swallowed up water a little but, I am not having even a single injury.

I’m sure I’m okay because you protected me.

Subaru: Ha- HAAAH!? What are you saying!?

Yui: Eh...what you asked, I just said that you’ve prote一

Subaru: AAH, shut up! Don’t say anymore than this!

Damn you…

Yui: (Ah...he has turned his face the other way…)

But, really thanks to you that I was able to return back here safely.

Thank you for supporting me.

Subaru: ...kh…

…...hmph.

Yui: ...We had to deal with many things but…

It’s good that we’ve come back safely.

Subaru: It was no good...we had to face terrible things.

I’ll regret it if I deal with such things again.

Yui: Fufu...right.

*CG Fades *

Subaru: For starters...let’s get back to that old-uncle at once.

Because it’s gonna piss me off he complains that we’re late of somethin’.

...kh…

Yui: Ah, Subaru kun, are you alright…!?

Subaru: My feet got staggered a bit. Never mind.

You better don’t worry about others as you're also terribly exhausted.

Yui: Ye- yeah…

(I’m worried even if he says it…)

*After a while + BG black*

Yui: (nnh…)

Place: ホテル•モーントシュタイン  客室 / Hotel • Mortstein,Guest room

Yui: (Huh...this place...where is it...it’s not the antique artist’s…? Hotel…?)

(I’ve remembered that I went to the antique art dealer with Subaru kun but…)

Subaru: Nngh...Oh shit...my body hurts…

Ah...huh, why are we in the hotel!?

Yui: (That’s good... he’s woken up too.)

Tell me, why are we right back in the hotel?

Subaru: Who knows...all I remembered is that we’ve gone to that Old-Uncle’s place…

Yui: (We’re on the same track...huh. ...Hm?)

(On the bedside table, there’s a note…)

*Yui gets that*

Subaru: What’s that? A note? Gimme that for a sec’.

『一I’ve received my required mineral safely. 』

『You’ve to be prepared for the last task on tomorrow so have a good rest today.』

『...Furthermore, I’ll throw you out in the street next time, if you fall down on my storefront.』

...He said.

Yui: Ah...that’s right...we collapsed in his store.

Shit...whom does he think we had collapsed for!?

Damn him…! That fukin’ talkative old bastard…!

Haah...I’m gonna sleep. You should sleep too. Tomorrow is the last task after all.

Yui: Yes, I will.

(Today was a really difficult day for us however...I have enjoyed it.)

一 The END of Chapter O 3

[sarcasticfina]

Fic Writer Tag Game

How many works do you have on AO3? 263

What’s your total AO3 word count? 4,901,188

How many fandoms have you written for, and what are they? including the fandoms on FFnet, that haven't yet been moved over to ao3, that'd be a total of 37. separating the larger fandoms (marvel, dcu) into their individual parts: Thor; Arrow; Smallville; The Vampire Diaries; Glee; Captain America; Supernatural; Teen Wolf; Iron Man; Life with Derek; Firefly; Friday Night Lights; X-Men; Fantastic Four; Harry Potter; Sons of Anarchy; Girl Meets World; Batman; Daredevil; From Dusk Till Dawn: The Series; Transformers; Lost Girl; Game of Thrones; Banshee; High School Musical; The OC; One Tree Hill; CSI: New York; Degrassi; Gossip Girl; NCIS; The Unusuals; Criminal Minds; iCarly; Secret Life of the American Teenager; Twilight; and The Listener

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1. and I wonder (if everything could ever feel this real forever) - darcy/bucky - Steve tells him that Darcy's harmless. Bucky imagines, on paper, Darcy is harmless. HYDRA wouldn't give her a second glance. But he does. He can barely keep his eyes off her. He's not sure he wants to. | Kudos: 5576

2. I Climbed The Tree To See The World (When The Gusts Came Around To Blow Me Down, I Held On As Tightly As You Held On To Me) - darcy centric | darcy/steve - The path to self-discovery, including becoming Coulson's assistant-slash-liaison-slash-bff, Captain America's lady love, and rating fourth on the SHIELD BAMF scale, was like the yellow brick road; it was chaos and confusion around every bend. | Kudos: 3973

3. Take a little piece of my heart (and keep it for yourself) - oliver/felicity - A collection of Olicity prompts on Tumblr posted here for easier access/reading. | Kudos: 3498

4. You put your arms around me (and I'm home) - darcy/bucky - A collection of Darcy/Bucky oneshots, drabbles, and prompt fills. | Kudos: 3293

5. you (anchor me back down) - darcy/bucky - "I'll be right back." Famous last words. | Kudos: 2747

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? not all of them. i do try to keep up on them, especially on longer stories when there's been significant wait times in between chapters, or when a reader is asking a question or is unclear on something. and especially when someone writes a really indepth comment/review, i like to respond to those and talk about motivations and character growth.

What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending? I've written a number of fics that either had suicide or major character death, so i'm not sure if one outranks the other in terms of most angsty... hmm... i remember "be still and know that I'm with you (be still and know that I am here)" and "light a match, burn the world to ash (I will watch it die, and hold your hand as I fly)" both got some pretty intense reactions when they were posted. And "It's Your Song That Sets Me Free (I Sing It While I Feel I Can't Go On)" was basically just angst from beginning to end. buuuuut, i think i'll say "so you think you can tell (heaven from hell" was, only because there's a build up of everything going so right, only to pivot at the end, so it feels very bittersweet.

Do you write crossovers? If so what’s the craziest one you’ve written? i loooooove crossovers. i find writing in the marvel fandom makes things quite easy, but also smallville. as long as i can find a common thread, i enjoy finding a way to overlap two shows. i'll say the hardest one to write was "ruby red slippers (unavailable in her size)." I'm not sure why, but i found writing each personality together just felt strange. i liked the idea behind the story, but i definitely remember feeling like i was really forcing myself to keep going, like something just didn't fit right.

Have you ever received hate on a fic? oh, definitely. you cannot please everyone, it's impossible. for the most part, hate comes and i either argue back, take the criticism for what it's worth, or just ignore it when it's baseless. i think the hate that bothered me the most was a homophobic PM someone sent me re: "you know I will adore you ('til eternity)," on FFnet. i actually went and searched it up. they've since blocked me so i can't read our whole thread back and forth. but i did put part of it on tumblr so i could rant on it a bit, so you can see that here.

Do you write smut? If so what kind? ha. yes. depending on the story, it can be really detailed or really flowery. it depends on the ship, the plot, and how graphic i feel like being. i've definitely become more comfortable over the years with my writing. that said, i think everybody likes something different. i once had a reviewer tell me a sex scene was too much, just too intense. it was a stefan/caroline story and to be fair, that entire oneshot was just them fucking, lol, but it is what it is. to each their own.

Have you ever had a fic stolen? Multiple times.

Have you ever had a fic translated? Yes! for the record, i am always happy to have my stories translated and shared. i just like having a link sent to me and to be credited.

What’s your all time favorite ship? i have a list of OTPs, because interests change and as shows come and go, my love for a ship can be shelved for a while before it pops back up at random. currently, i can't get enough of buck/eddie from 9-1-1. and, historically, chloe/oliver (smallville) and felicity/oliver (arrow) have been two of my top OTPs. but i think i'd have to go with bonnie/damon. they had all the potential and the show dropped the ball by not exploring it. at the same time, that's kind of a blessing, because i don't trust those writers to properly explore what they had without eventually destroying it for the likes of de/ena. it means a treasure trove for writing where it could have gone and all the what if's.

What’s a WIP that you want to finish, but don’t think you ever will? the intention is always to finish. but given how i feel about allison mack and how that impacts my feelings re: chloe sullivan, pretty much anything with her as a main character is not something i see myself returning to.

What are your writing strengths? What are your writing weaknesses? i'm putting these together because my strength is my weakness. i love to write. when i get an idea, i go all in and i will skip eating and sleeping to just write write write. but i also eventually hit a wall and i get so many ideas that i hyperfocus on one until the steam is gone and then i hyperfocus on the next one to maintain that need to keep writing, accidentally leaving the last story in the dust for entirely too long. i also have clinical depression that comes and goes, which hasn't been super great mixed with covid and isolation, so more often recently, i find myself overly exhausted and despite wanting to write, can rarely get motivated to do so. so, pre-covid, wrote so much i left entirely too many stories dangling. during covid, i've just been reading and struggling to get myself focused enough to do what i love.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic? i appreciate the authenticity when possible, but i've recently been reading more about how native speakers of other languages feel when a) their language is butchered by google translate, or b) it's just not genuine in terms of how bilingual speakers act or speak.

What was the first fandom you’ve written for? it was smallville, but i remember adopting it out to someone else because i wasn't going to finish it. so if you look at my ffnet, the first fandom i wrote for appears to be x-men: the movie, but i remember writing a chloe/oliver story prior to that.

What’s your favorite fic that you’ve written? i have a lot. i mean, on ffnet, i have 576 stories, many of which were transferred over to ao3, with a lot of oneshots and drabbles getting joined together into collections. so there's a ton to pick from that span a 14-ish year timeline.

"you know I will adore you ('til eternity)" and "let me break (the walls that surround me)" hold a special place in my heart.

honestly, each story is important in its own way. there are bits and pieces of each that i love. every time i write something new it feels like my favorite. my best. and then a new idea comes along. there are scenes i've written that i loved more than the whole of what they became. lines that stand out that are almost too good to be a part of the larger picture.

one of my all time favorite passages i've written was bonnie's thoughts on damon and herself in 'if you love me (let me go)":

He is far from perfect. He is a novel of red, corrective ink. He is frayed pages and torn binding. His life, his choices, his mistakes leave lasting effects on everyone he meets.

She is a lifeboat with a hole in it. An anchor that drowns in the sea while everyone else remains steady above. She is both the calm and the storm, and while she screams that she will not be tamed, she cries. Bittersweet tears that go unnoticed and uncared about.

there are other stories, other pieces of dialogue, that i've been proud of. that make me laugh when i re-read them. that make me cry. and i love them. there are others that make me wilt and cringe and regret. it's a process. love and pride and growth, all bound together.

Tagging: @absentlyabbie, @anonymous033, and anyone else who'd like to fill this all out, haha