#because when in austria amirite!

[skitskatdacat63]

Update, probably won't be able to post much at all for this upcoming gp, BECAUSE I AM GOING TO THE GP!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[secretagentspydetectiveninja]

okay i’m gonna watch all this year’s entries in a row and React

FRANCE: oh gosh that was so sweet???

CZECH REPUBLIC: this is a bop, i like it, and i also like his earrings

ARMENIA: the song is catchy and she could order my execution and i would thank her

ITALY: mY HEART, HOW DOES ITALY ALWAYS DO THIS TO MY EMOTIONS

RUSSIA: this is exactly what eurovision should be. 100000/10 they have my vote.

DENMARK: aw it's cute! YES!

ESTONIA: my first reaction to the name of the song is "baby don't hurt me" but anyway yes it's a good song

ROMANIA: oooh this is good stuff, excellent pun too, also the aesthetic of the video is pretty

AZERBAIJAN: "straight or gay or inbetween" listen i'm aroace and even i want to marry you HOLY MOLY??? <333 i have changed my vote

ALBANIA: owo no music video? anyway yes this sounds nice yet angsty, she's an amazing singer

GREECE: this infant did a fantastic job and i love the music video lmao

PORTUGAL: that outfit is top notch and so is the song

MOLDOVA: it's not memedova but you know what? this is good too, i like it

MALTA: this feels so inspirational somehow, the music and also the parkour

SERBIA: heck yeahhh this is so catchy and cool

POLAND: apparently this is an infant too? she's a fantastic singer omg

SAN MARINO: this is typical san marino entry and it's great, you guys did serhat proud

NORTH MACEDONIA: hsgdjgsjGGhg this gives me call me maybe vibes lmaooo the dude's clearly into the bartender mate

ICELAND: there is not a single part of this that isn't iconic. smh guess i'm gonna just have to vote for iceland again

FINLAND: why is this song so accurate right now T_T way to make me cry mate

SWEDEN: i??? love this????? they sound and look AMAZING????? this just makes me feel happy

CYPRUS: ohoho groovy angst, i like it

SLOVENIA: aesthetically gorgeous and makes me want to stay hydrated and whoa she hits those high notes so well

BULGARIA: what a trippy music video hsgkfgskhf anyway it's really soft and pretty

IRELAND: yesssss good stuff!!! it's catchy and boppy and the video is so retro

AUSTRIA: damn this is so funky, it makes me feel alive

ISRAEL: this is glorious oh my goshhhh it's catchy AND it visually looks awesome AND has like a gazillion languages in it

NETHERLANDS: this song... makes me feel things... just like arcade did... god i'm feeling so bad now that all these musicians never got to perform these songs this year

SWITZERLAND: wtf this is so haunting (and i mean that in the best possible way)

LATVIA: this sounds so great and the music video is surreal af and it's nice to see my yearly tradition of "having a celebrity crush on the latvian entry" is still going strong

GEORGIA: this is amazing :O please inject this song directly into my veins. i might honestly change my vote again

GERMANY: while i feel like this probably still would have come last place in the televote, like always, THIS IS ACTUALLY GREAT I'M BOPPING

BELARUS: hooooo i love their aesthetic, that eyeliner amirite?? the song is catchy too

LITHUANIA: why is this amazing? i honestly don't know how or why but it is, it just IS. also what the heck is this music video it's so weird but also iconic

CROATIA: bless this guy he did an awesome job, those long notes near the end!!!

UK: okay first things first fuck all of you for not voting for poor michael last year and dooming him to last place when he tried so hard and did so well. ANYWAY, moving on... THIS SONG IS AMAZING AND YOU'D BETTER VOTE FOR JAMES NEXT YEAR OKAY. SCREW YOU. THE UK SENDS GOOD SONGS THESE DAYS SO JUST FORGET ABOUT POLITICS FOR A SECOND AND THINK ABOUT HOW HARD OUR ENTRANTS TRY. PEOPLE WOULD VOTE FOR ANY UK SONG IF SWEDEN HAD SENT IT, YOU KNOW IT. okay okay aish calm down you're not even British british

UKRAINE: man i love this!!! it sounds so unique and awesome, and the outfits too

SPAIN: yoooo i like the sound of this and this dude is rather pretty

BELGIUM: this is so dreamy in a sad way, i like it, the words "losing game" are just sending me though

NORWAY: her dress is so sparkly!! and she's such a good singer omg

AUSTRALIA: australia, once again, really gets the eurovision spirit and for that i can only respect them. also this is legit amazing

in conclusion i have no idea who i’d vote for because none of them sent metal

[borisbubbles]

EUROVISION 2018 #5 & #4

05. SWITZERLAND ZiBBZ - “Stones” 32nd place

~*Wild Jokah On A Gole Froam*~

Yanking away the top NQ slot in this year’s ranking is, of course, everybody’s favourite Sibling alliance, ZiBZZ!! 

As you know, I looooooooove mental health awareness songs, and I particularly love those with approaches that work (*cough* NOT “Goodbye” *cough*). While most of these songs are doused in motherly, cloddlesome tones, “Stones” doesn’t beat around the bush and argues that one must confront their fears HEAD-ON. 

To transliterate the (ridic, amusing) lyrics into Common English: 

“People have always been shitbags and have treated others like crap for aeons and there’s nothing I can do about it because people won’t fucking change.. SO fucking WHAT? Why would let those assholes affect my present and future the same way they’ve influenced my past? Fuck that noise. It’s time to let the inner demons rest, grow as a person AND help others get out of the deep end while doing so.”. 

Holy fuck what an epic Truth BOMB, I can relate to all of that scalding hot tea. The best way to get around depression, anger and frustration *is* to 1) remove you from the toxic environment 2) find kindred spirits and support each other 3) find the courage to leave your past behind and build a future for yourself. Mental health is a BATTLEFIELD that HITS YOU with its best shots (did I just ref Pat Benatar twice? 🤭) while you’re struggling and “Stones” acklowedges this reality so hard. About fucking time someone lit the flares of ferocity to stand up against BULLYING and HATE. ALL HAIL COCO the ZiBB, FIRST OF HER NAME, THE UNDUN, MOTHER OF FLARES, KHALEESI OF THE DOWNTRODDEN, NON-THROWER OF STONES, BREAKER OF TABOOS, QUEEN OF THE HURT, TORMENTED AND BROWBEATEN. 

Ain’t the only one who don’t wanna throw stooooooooooones

But of course, message alone isn’t enough to get such a high ranking, but fortunately ZiBBZ delivered musically as well. “Stones” has the perfect type of melody for Eurovision: catchy,  repetitive and accessible, but never boring or tiresome because the arrangement was spot.fucking.on. The horns and tuba’s give the music so much gravitas, the backing AHEMs are excellent  and CoCo’s five-packs-a-day type of gravelly voice adds so much realness to the song. "Stones” as a whole is jarring and complex and succeeds at elliciting the emotional response it aims for. This is my favourite song of the 42, by no small margin. 

And then there’s the staging, which... I have mixed feelings about, not gonnal ie. It saddens me that even at this high a rank I must again resort to critique. I mean, the ACT was great. That motherfuckin’ flare is one of the few goosebump moments I got from this year, Coco is Minerva in a hipster body, Stee is a lovable goof, but... you have this amazing, dynamic song that is capable BLOWING EVERYONE AWAY and it  kinda... doesn’t? 

I would say that “Stones” was mostly hampered by its camerawork, which was mostly AWFUL. Which idiot [Hans Pancake 🙄] is responsible for framing such a powerful, uptempo song with slow, drawn-out shots?

I mean, shots such as this one:

(why didn’t they just focus on Stee??? or the audience?)

and that one:

(You can clearly see Coco throwing away a drumstick at the start of the preformance... Why the faraway shots?? Why no close-ups when she’s drumming happening???? NO ONE CARED ABOUT SANNA’S LIGHT CAGE SO WHY WOULD THEY START CARING NOW??? (seriously, fuck you Hans Culpepper))

This is the reason why “Stones” failed to ensnare the audience’s attention. Wrong people with the right to stage and ZiBBZ can’t do anything about it. I chose to not take it into account when I decided on their final ranking, but it’s sooooo frustrating to see Switzerland FINALLY strike the motherload and fall flat because of some moronic cinematographic decisions. Now watch Switz pick something mediocre and be overrated by the Basics/NQ once again (lol I say this without having listened to the Swiss songs, but can you blame me?). Oh well, ZiBBZ have since moved on to better things -

- and so should we :). Still praying they pull a Poli in five years or so. THE WORLD NEEDS IT

04. SLOVENIA Lea Sirk - “Hvala, ne!” 22nd place

Damn’ this is such a tough decision. Cutting entries loose at this point really hurts y’all.

So as you know, I really, REALLY fucking love Lea Sirk and even said that, in the unlikely event that she qualified, she’d WIN the ranking. However, while I am probably obliged by contract to grant her the first place, I can honestly say that... I like my top three more?  Lea could have easily won this ranking, had my opinions on Elina, DoReDos and Ieva stayed the same; but they didn’t (they went up obvi), so here we are. The above paragraph is just a disclaimer to explain why Slovenia don’t rank higher than they do, because holy fuck this "Hvala, ne!” was awesoooooooooome. Anti-establishmentarian trap-pop that was a shock qualifier and made a flashy gimmick work TWICE <3 There’s a reason why the Good Gays Fanbase (do I include myself in that? hmmm 🤔) have nicknamed it “Hvala Slay!”. 

But first, (-- Julie Chen-Moonves) let’s discuss the PHENOMENON that is Lea Sirk. My love for her predates this contest by several years, from the time when I only knew her as the botty cyborg sidekick to the heiress of the Ravenclaw Empire herself, Tinkara Kovac. 

“KEN U BEE-LIEF ET???”

who happens to be *my* fave of Outstanding Eurovision Year 2014 (Yes, over Conchita, go cry) and is a contender for fave entry of the decade. The Summer of 2014 was a fantastic experience, partly thanks to Lea and I will forever cherish her for that reason. So when this beautiful dubstep fae was selected to rep Slovenia, now sporting a lilac killer braid, a trashbag jumpsuit and a cabal of slut-dropping dance devas of destruction... like *instantly* fanning my proverbial clit right there. It only got better during Lea’s pre-show content, proving her not only cool chick onstage, but off the stage as well. Having a teenage girl crush on Waylon <3 (Confessing this IN FRONT OF A LIVE AUDIENCE WHICH INCLUDED BOTH WAYLON AND HER HUSBAND lmao bless <3). Impersonating Salvador on some Slovene version of the Soundmix Show <3 There’s no way Lea couldn’t deliver in Lisbon.

And “deliver” is underselling what Lea did, holy fucking hell that live was EVERYTHING. It’s hard to even name what the brightest shining star of their performance was, since Slovenia brought an entire fucking galaxy  of them. I’d say the best thing was probably the choreography, which managed to be spellbinding, professional and hilarious all at once.  Lea and her dancers-in-crime put on an amazing, electrifying show, aided by dynamic camerawork and lighting (Take note, Hans Pancake 🙄). 

My personal fave thing about “Hvala ne!” however was that it QUALIFIED BY A COMFORTABLE MARGIN AND WOULD HAVE UNDER ANY POINTS SYSTEM <345871 I love a deserving shock qualifier (see: Albania), but when it happens to a preshow fave of mine that I considered all but doomed (and a contender for last in the semi). . . There are no superlatives in my glossary that can describe the state of elation I felt when Lea was announced as a finalist. Netta might as well cede her trophy because the Eurogaes were the actual winners of this year 💗🧡💛💚💙💜 “Hvala, ne!” more like “HVALA motherfucking SLAYS HATERS” amirite???

Granted “Hvala, ne!” was the same in Lisbon as during the preshow, with only two marked exceptions. One was Lea had added a chorus in shabby Portuguese (”OBRIGADA NAO NAO!!!” <3) which was hilar, and the other was... the break!

Granted the semi break was kinda *blah* to me. “Zomg the music dies riiiiiiight before the bridge how coincidental”. Sure, Jan. Either way, I found it moderately funny, mostly because of the random extras that were clearly being paid by production to oversell it <3 

But the best thing was that it WORKED and brought Lea to the finale where she performed a SECOND break and this one was downright epic. The audience actually sang along with her <3 <3 <3 <3 Two different instances of the same gimmick and making it work BOTH times <3 When will YOUR faves???

I suppose that, at the end of the day, “Hvala, ne!” was an experimental song that you either love or hate. Why anyone would ever hate this radiant nymph is beyond me, but whatever. My ranking, my rules, ya shallow fools. I *loved* this bizarre mix of K-Pop and Hip-Hop, sung in Slovene and Portuguese, (which is the most unique combination of languages ever featured in a Eurovision entry, I’m sure <3), with badass self-referential lyrics that SLAM DOWN musical conformity in a year that was all about rewarding it. In other words PRECISELY WHAT THIS CONTEST NEEDED. You know, there are plenty of countries out there that have never scored a top five in Eurovision and probably never will until they find their monster runaway winner (Lordi, Salvador). I *hope* the next one is from Slovenia. Raiven performing a song by Maraaya, with Lea and BQL as the back-up singers. Come on y’all, let’s make Eurovision Great Again. Hvala, slay, slay, slay, slay

 RANKING SO FAR

04. Slovenia (Lea Sirk - “Hvala, ne!”)

05. Switzerland (ZiBBZ - “Stones”)

06. Germany (Michael Schulte - “You let me walk alone”)

07. Albania (Eugent Bushpepa - “Mall”)

08. France (Madame Monsieur - “Mercy”)

09. Hungary (AWS - “Viszlát nyár”)

10. Finland (Saara Aalto - “Monsters”)

11. Bulgaria (EQUINOX - “Bones”)

12. Denmark (Rasmussen - “Higher ground”)

13. Malta (Christabelle - “Taboo”)

14. Cyprus (Eleni Foureira - “Fuego”)

15. United Kingdom (SuRie - “Storm”)

16. Serbia (Balkanika - “Nova Deca”)

17. Portugal (Cláudia Pascoal - “O jardim”)

18. The Netherlands (Waylon - “Outlaw in ‘em”)

19. Ukraine (MÉLOVIN - “Under the ladder”)

20. Macedonia (Eye Cue - “Lost and Found”)

21. San Marino (Jessika ft. Jenifer Brening - “Who We Are”)

22. Sweden (Benjamin Ingrosso - “Dance You Off”)

23. Austria (Cesár Sampson - “Nobody but you”)

24. Latvia (Laura Rizzotto - “Funny girl”)

25. Azerbaijan (AISEL - “X my heart”)

26. Israel (Netta - “Toy”)

27. Norway (Alexander Rybak  - “That’s how you write a song”)

28. Montenegro (Vanja Radovanovic - “Inje”)

29. Armenia (Sevak Khanagyan - “Qami”)

30. Poland (Gromee ft. Lukas Meijer - “Light me up”)

31. Greece (Yianna Terzi - “Oniro mou”)

32. Georgia (Iriao - “For you”)

33. Belgium (Sennek - “A matter of time”)

34. Italy (Ermal Meta & Fabrizio Moro - “Non mi avete fatto niente”)

35. Romania (The Humans - “Goodbye”)

36. Ireland (Ryan O'Shaughnessy - “Together”)

37. Croatia (Franka - “Crazy”)

38. Belarus (ALEKSEEV - “Forever”)

39. Russia (Julia Samoylova - “I Won’t Break”)

40. Spain (Amaia & Alfred - “Tu canción”)

41. Iceland (Ari Ólafsson - “Our choice”)

42. Australia (Jessica Mauboy - “We got love”)

43. Czech Republic (Mikolas Jozef - “Lie to me”)

[nuka-rockit]

I’m so amazed that apparently it’s still debated wether or not Frederick II. of Prussia might have been...kinda gay

I know it’s a joke among historyblr that straight historians will bend any and all evidence that suggest that maybe, possibly, a historically important figure was not 100% completely and utterly straight, but I have never before seen this form of failed gaydar so blatantly displayed

Just to be clear, here are some facts about ol’ Fred:

tried to run away from Prussia with his “”good friend”” Hans Hermann von Katte when he was 18 

They were caught and tried for desertion, which carried the death penalty. Frederick as the heir to the throne was pardonned by his father, who also made him watch Hans’ execution. When von Katte was walked to the chopping block, Frederick reportedly blew him a kiss saying “Mon Cher Katte, I beg your forgiveness a thousandfold” and fell unconcious when the beheading took place. just dudes being bros amirite

Told one of the king’s ministers he’d disown the wife his father picked for him as soon as he’d ascend to the throne and even threatened suicide

Most likely never consummated the marriage with her

Excused this by saying he’s probably, like, totally infertile because of some obscure venereal disease he totally had sometime in the past, dude. Which means he ABSOLUETLY CANNOT HAVE SEX WITH HIS WIFE (or any mistresses for that matter) EVER. Or have children (he even named his brother Frederick William heir to the throne pretty much immediately so he’d never have to try for children). No this doesn’t sound like an excuse at all no sir

His sister Wilhelmine is reportedly the only woman he was ever close to. Apparently disliked women so much that they were not allowed to even enter his personal castle Sanssouci (and yes that includes his wife)

Had a statue of the “Praying Boy” of Rhodos (a representation of a catamite of emperor Hadrian) erected right in front of his library window, which is basically the 18th century equivalent of putting a big huge sign that says G-A-Y on your front lawn

Had a big huge fan crush on Voltaire, whom he, for example, once wrote: “Monsieur, the thought of you fills me night and day. I dream of my prince the way one dreams of one’s lover” and called him “the most alluring being I know” MH YES WHAT A TOTALLY HETEROSEXUAL THING TO SAY ISNT IT LADS MMH YES VERY STRAIGHT

The first words he said to his wife after he returned from 7 years of warfare were “Madame have grown more corpulent.”

and there’s plenty more (that im not gonna list because this was a spontanous post but damn). i mean come on how obvious do you have to be?? this is about as blatantly gay as you can get in the 1700s and yet still my poor gay eyes have to read phrases like “played with the discreet air of homosexuality following French fashion” (JUST PLAYED WITH HE WAS TOTALLY STRAIGHT YOU GUYS) and “disliked women because of his enmity with Maria Theresia of Austria and the  Czarina Elisabeth of Russia” (AND NOT BECAUSE HE WAS GAY) and never consummated his marriage because he “believed he was infertile following a venereal infection” (AND NOT BECAUSE HE WAS GAY)

i could cry the author of the article i just read was trying so hard

[tvwriteups]

I’m gonna watch the whole Love Shine a Light special thingy but I’m honestly not expecting much.  I really don’t care to hear “Heroes” and “Hallelujah” yet again after just having heard them last year. And After “Nana Banana” (or whatever it was called) I’m not sure I want to hear another song from Netta.

I actually tried to put together an “alternative ESC” for myself that includes 27 non-winning songs from 27 different countries. For some reason I tried to be all diplomatic and chose songs from the big 5, winning countries dating back to 2000 (the year I started watching), filled out with countries that finished in 2nd place. I almost excluded Australia just because but using all of this criteria yielded 27 which was the max number allowed with the special 2015 rules so I ran with that.

This gets long so I’m cutting it here.

Overall it was hard picking songs. I’d break down the selection process as this:

Easy slam-dunks because there’s something really good and not much else really (Latvia, Serbia)

Obvious for me but maybe not as slam-dunky because there were other interesting songs (Estonia, Iceland)

My gut says it’s this one. Yes, it’s this one (Spain)

I guess this is the one? Like, what else could it be? (Portugal, Finland, Israel)

I thought I’d have tons to choose from but after listening to these I’m surprised I don’t like this country’s songs that much (SWEDEN!)

Country with probably my favorite winning songs (”Dansevise”, “Fly on the Wings of Love”) but for some reason, out of the non-winners, I prefer the entries that scrape the bottom of the table or don’t even make it out of the SFs (Denmark)

There’s the song that results say I should choose but...like, this song does nothing for me. Results say I shouldn’t choose a different song but I sorta wanna. (Austria, Cyprus)

Multiple good choices but it didn’t matter if I chose the “best” one because there is just so much entertainment involved (Russia, Ukraine)

The sincere ballad vs the wacky party song (France at the extreme to the point where I felt shame and guilt; Bulgaria at the much less extreme; Azerbaijan in the middle, probably Norway too...and Australia...and Germany...actually a lot of countries)

You are making this very hard because there is practically nothing terribly good to choose from! (Greece)

You are making this very hard because you have a bunch of very good songs but they’re all really different so they can’t be compared at all! (Italy, Belgium)

I also tried to balance it out to get more song and year representation so when it came to the countries that presented me with multiple choices I tried to spread out the styles (Belgium), year representation (Azerbaijan) and defaulted to which song had a better presentation rather than the song I actually liked more (Bulgaria, Italy). Often I thought I was dumb to limit myself to these countries but I felt like if I made an exception and threw out Greece to put Lithuania in then I would NEVER STOP and keep doing it.

I even wrote a simple program to randomize the running order which somehow managed to front-load the show and left a strand in the middle perfect for snack or bathroom breaks.

This is what I ended up with:

1. Norway (2019) - KEiiNO - 'Spirit in the Sky' 2. Denmark (2001) - Rollo & King - 'Never Ever Let You Go' 3. Sweden (2014) - Sanna Nielsen - 'Undo' 4. Germany (2000) - Stefan Raab - 'Wadde hadde dudde da' 5. Ukraine (2007) - Verka Serduchka - 'Dancing Lasha Tumbai' 6. Australia (2015) - Guy Sebastian - 'Tonight Again' 7. Serbia (2004) - Zeljko Joksimovic - 'Lane Moje' 8. Russia (2012) - Buranovskiye Babushki - 'Party for Everybody' 9. United Kingdom (2002) - Jessica Garlick - 'Come Back' 10. Azerbaijan (2013) - Farid Mammadov - 'Hold Me' 11. Austria (2018) - Cesar Sampson - 'Nobody But You' 12. Greece (2004) - Sakis Rouvas - 'Shake It' 13. Iceland (2009) - Yohanna - 'Is It True?' 14. France (2010) - Jessy Matador - 'Allez Ola Olé' 15. Netherlands (2014) - The Common Linnets - 'Calm After the Storm' 16. Portugal (2008) - Vãnia Fernandes - 'Senhora Do Mar (Negras Águas)' 17. Finland (2011) - Paradise Oskar - 'Da Da Dam' 18. Malta (2005) - Chiara - 'Angel' 19. Israel (2005) - Shiri Maymon - 'Hasheket Shenish'ar' 20. Estonia (2009) - Urban Symphony - 'Rändajad' 21. Belgium (2003) - Urban Trad - 'Sanomi' 22. Turkey (2010) - MaNga - 'We Could Be the Same' 23. Cyprus (2018) - Eleni Foureira - 'Fuego' 24. Italy (2015) - Il Volo - 'Grande Amore' 25. Spain (2012) - Pastora Soler - 'Quédate Conmigo' 26. Bulgaria (2017) - Kristian Kostov - 'Beautiful Mess' 27. Latvia (2000) - Brainstorm - 'My Star'

2006 and 2016 are missing representation. It would be very easy to change Bulgaria’s song to 2016′s (which would also give me a slightly faster show) but then 2017 loses a song. But then I could change that to Belgium’s song but then 2003 loses a song AND a bit of diversity with it. It’s strange because I liked a lot of 2017 but could easily not choose a single song from it.  I could also just switch Australia’s 2015 song for their better-placing 2016 one but then that slows down the show...and I just like Guy Sebastian more (Sorry, can’t help it).

2006 somehow comes out as hot garbage here and really feeds into my “Toss out Greece and put in Lithuania” feeling. (And it surprised me that I would pretty much toss out any non-winning Greek entry to put in “We Are the Winners.”)

I could replace “Shake It” with “Die For You” but the presentation of that song sucks. “Alcohol Is Free” is a fun presentation but that song is headache inducing after a while. But, yeah, ugh Greece.

So, yeah, a cuckoo bananas move within my weird set of rules would be to remove “Shake It”, use Greece’s 2001 song “Die For You”, replace Denmark’s 2001 entry “Never Ever Let You Go” with their 2016 (“died in the semifinal”) song “Soldiers of Love.”  HAHAHAHAHA.  (This is why designing one’s own ESC from ESC cast-offs can be so fun and maddening at the same time.)

Orrrrr, put in the 2002 Malta song, remove the 2002 UK song for pretty much any UK song in any year because who cares amirite? And 2006 was that hot mess of an unintentionally pedo UK rap song.  LOL. At least it replaces two slow songs for two faster ones.

But then I end up with TWO rap songs which isn’t indicative of the ESC at all. But I guess Germany can easily be replaced as well EXCEPT that I like Stefan Raab.

Oy vey, 2006!

I still might change a bunch of these songs.

[omgkatsudonplease]

Hi, I hope you don't mind me asking but would you recommend any books to read? I'm trying to decide what next to read, and I thought I like your writing so I'll ask what you would rec? Don't worry about genre, just any book you'd think one should read or anything that inspires your writing ? I love your writing so automatically felt you must read books with depth. I hope this ask doesn't feel too pushy or intrusive. Thank you :)

Hahaha, oh my god. I don’t consume as much published fiction as I should (so much fanfiction. So little time) so I’m probably not the best person for book recs that aren’t classics/things you’d probably read for school, so :P but I can tell you some books that have stuck with me over the years or have informed portions of my works!

The entire Middle-earth legendarium (the Hobbit, LotR, the Silm) by J.R.R Tolkien has been with me since sixth grade, and I guess his attention to detail in worldbuilding really rubbed off on me! The Hobbit is a very short light read, though you’ll probably get irritated at the lack of female characters. LotR requires stamina because he goes on and on and on about Tom Bombadil for a chapter or two and it’s… It reads like a history book. Because he made up LotR to disseminate his elvish languages Sindarin and Quenya. It wasn’t the other way around. And it’s pretty obvious. (And the Silm is even more of a history book, but with added Elves Behaving Badly. and suffering.)

Tess of the D’Urbervilles by Thomas Hardy is one of my favourite pieces of classic literature, not only because Thomas Hardy drags 19th century British society for their double standards regarding female sexuality but also the prose is so beautiful? There’s a scene where Angel Clare carries Tess across a river and it’s nothing but doki doki schmoop schmoop in the most beautiful of words, and now that I really think about it no wonder most of the selkie AU was also doki doki schmoop schmoop in pretty words. I love Tess so much, I would fuckin die for her, and fuck EL James for completely misinterpreting the entire novel in Fifty Shades.

Much Ado About Nothing by William Shakespeare is probably one of my favourite comedies of his (but I like. am a huge Shakespeare nerd? check out my Shakespeare sideblog @eighttwotwopointthreethree lmao). I’ve got mixed feelings about the slutshaming section of it but like, it’s pretty obvious that Claudio is a foil to Benedick when that plot point rears its ugly head so like. Kill Claudio amirite. Anyway. The point is, the entire setup between Bea and Ben is fucking amazing and @actualyuuri and I super duper want to see a Viktuuri AU set to Much Ado for this reason

(I could also talk about Julius Caesar, and Twelfth Night, and Richard III, and Romeo and Juliet – but then I’d be here all day. I love Shakespeare so much)

Never Let Me Go by Kazuo Ishiguro fucked. Me. Up. That quiet moody introspective narration! This terrible dystopian universe told in such a soft way!!! Pls let me live oh my god. 

Life on Mars by Tracey K Smith is a book of poems that she wrote to work out her feelings around her father’s death, couching it in stuff about the endless unknown of space (and also David Bowie). I feel like her style of poetry at least lowkey influenced some of the poems in the selkie AU? Also I just love space poems.

The Handmaid’s Tale by Margaret Atwood is so… relevant. And I’m so pumped for the Hulu miniseries oh my god. It’s a really gripping, slightly terrifying in the current climate kind of read. 

The Princess of Cleves by Mme de Lafayette. oH MY GOD OH MY GOD. I know like most French students hate having to read this novel but I am SO ALIVE, I LIVE for longwinded descriptions of how fuckin besotted M de Nemours is, I LIVE for the sweet sweet drama of people who clearly wanna bone each other deciding not to and then pining away terribly forever and ever. (I also LIVE for the ending lmfao because that’s exactly how I like het media to end.) Anyway, if I were to write a period drama Viktuuri AU I would probably utilise elements of the plot of the Princess of Cleves that is how much I love this novel okay. You’ll probably see influences from it in my writing from the way a lot of the action gets driven by introspection and stream of consciousness, so yeah.

Also, I don’t know if you also want nonfiction recs, but I really enjoyed Day of Empire by Amy Chua, the Dark Net by Jamie Bartlett, How to Ruin a Queen: Marie Antoinette and the Diamond Necklace Affair by Johnathan Beckman (it doesn’t even read like a history book it reads more like a whodunit!) and oh. my god. The Reluctant Empress by Brigitte Hamann. I am such trash for this biography of the Empress Elisabeth I of Austria. I would also probably put in elements of the early parts of her life into this hypothetical period drama AU for Viktuuri because fuckin Franz Joseph disregarded all of his duties to watch his fiancee get her portrait done like he’s not the fuckin Emperor of Austria? What the hell? And she commissioned portraits of herself in deshabille for an anniversary present??? which he hung over his desk like BABE. DON’T PUT NUDES OF YOUR WIFE UP IN YOUR OFFICE OH MY GOD. (like I recognise that her story was ultimately super duper tragic and the Habsburgs are all just a big mess but every time I think about this stuff I just die a little on the inside from happiness so)

Anyway that’s probably enough to get you started, and I’m sorry for my disintegrating coherency. Like I said I really should read more published works! Pretty high on my list rn is the Miniaturist by Jessie Burton mostly because I stole so much of what happened to her regarding the publication and success of that novel for the selkie AU that I’m really genuinely interested in what caused such hype lmao. So yeah happy reading!

[djseaward]

autumn dreamland

one thing i really like about living in české budějovice is its proximity to some pretty interesting places. we are only two hours from both prague to the north and linz, austria to the south. of course, because of international public transport tariffs, prague is by far the more affordable place to head of the two when you've got a free day and wanna soak up some big(ger) city lovin'. especially if you are a loyal české dráhy (czech trains) customer like i am and rack up enough points on the regular to earn free train tickets (public service announcement: if you live in the czech republic and frequently travel with public transportation, there is no reason not to be doing this). frugality win!

we headed there last saturday for a proper dosage of all good fall things. in the morning, we started with the karlín farmer's market at karlínské náměstí. what enjoyable fall weather it was to stroll around the beautiful church, have a cup of fruit juice here and a zelňák there. zelňáky -- essentially a flat, savory sauerkraut biscuit -- i have been told are specialties of the south bohemian region but the zelňáky from the pekárna at this farmer's market are amazing - a bit breadier and softer. get in on that!

above, definitely a fan of the exterior of the church of saints cyril and methodius in karlin square. beautiful churches seem to be in every square in the city, but this one is really nice.

after a spot of shopping, we fueled up at our favorite ramen place. i cannot sing the praises enough of ramen kitchen on 28.října street near můstek. the prices have definitely gone up in the 3+ years since its inception -- with a location like that, who can blame them -- but the ramen is always top-notch and the service always kind and friendly. alex requested this stop particularly as there is nothing better when you have a cold than hot steamy asian noodles! (or anytime, really)

what better after lunch than a lazy wander around the streets of old town? this is one of my absolute favorite prague things to do, no matter the season. well, maybe besides the summer seasons as the streets are more likely to be absolutely crushed with tourists, but it's good most any old time of year. 

it reminds me of the days that i was (f)unemployed in january over four years ago; had no money and nothing but time to create my own cheap entertainment. i would walk from our flat in malá strana across the charles bridge with something of a loose goal in mind but with no real time limit. and man, can you ever get twisted and turned around in those winding streets! but that's the beauty of the old town quarter, i think. go where it looks nice and maybe you'll wind up in a secret lane, square, or at a cute kavárna that you've never seen before and probably won't see again. highly recommended for broke wanderers! (tangent alert!) which reminds me of this scavenger hunt - deeep in this blog’s archives - we did that month! so fun to participate in that.... click over if you want to see some winter prague silliness from two people with a lot of time on their hands; it’s good for a laugh.

although the charles bridge usually remains packed with people on a saturday afternoon in fair weather, i really just do not care. as long as its not signal fest bad, it is one of the highlights of my day (or even week) to have the pleasure to stand on or walk across this dear bridge. to be on charles bridge is the single strongest reminder that i feel like i'm living a dream. i live here. this is my life. absolutely unreal - feels so alive to me. of course you can always find yourself with more solitude in the early morning or late evening, but it doesn't matter to me. i don't see crowds, i just feel the energy.

of course, no autumn season is complete without the annual pumpkin spice latte stop (amirite?) at the malostranské náměstí starbucks before a walk up the street i used to live on and up to petřín hill! spending a sunny autumn afternoon in prague walking around petřín as the yellow leaves fall on you -- peering out at this great city, speaking about big hopes, dreams, and ideas -- this is also a must do.

although there are plenty of great parks and spaces to stroll around in the capital, there's something for me about petřín. it's one of my favorites; seeming so imbued with the history of hundreds of years of praguers, history and culture coming together. i also secretly wished i had another stomach in order to partake in tasty treats at one of the many lovely refreshment stands near the top. the sun went lower and lower behind the hills as we sat on a bench and talked until it got a bit cooler.

alex wasn't feeling a hundred percent, so we barely managed to catch the fast express back to budejovice. this train is on a line through austria, finally ending in zürich, switzerland - what a reminder that you live in the middle of europe to board a zurich bound train, i'll tell ya. it made only one stop in tábor before pausing in budejovice long enough for us to jump out of -- pretty sweet! (file away in memory if i ever want to take a sleeper car to zürich)

the next morning, i awoke in my own bed in budejovice to the pattering of falling rain. grey skies? morning rain? can you believe this washingtonian was excited? although we sometimes get rainy mornings, most often the climate here is clear and sunny, so a rainy morning when you don't have to go anywhere feels really special. it almost feels like when it snows and you just don't want it to stop! time to put the kettle on and get cozy!

i pulled on my rain jacket to meet a friend (hi nat!) at the houseboat cafe, newly opened this summer. ohhhhh, what is better than a houseboat + falling rain in the autumn? nothing. the answer is there is literally nothing better. to sip a cappuccino, chat, and watch the yellow leaves float by, giving the appearance that we are actually motoring somewhere. to autumn dreamland, i suppose.

ps, more prague & czech life in the autumn in the posts “prahably october”, “prague autumn magic”, and “indian summer”.

this post is a part of wanderful wednesday.