#because violence in Hillrock Height is just way too common.
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iamirhen · 3 months ago
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Just a normal Hillrock Heights kid.
A not-cropped, text free version of the original panel of this fancomic.
You can find Hunter's portrait here.
Feel free to download, just don't repost without credit.
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iamirhen · 14 days ago
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Robbie Reyes, poverty and being stuck in survival mode.
(Or why does he keep making questionable choices)
Edited. The core of this is that he's not dumb, he's not just desperate, he's also trapped in this perpetual state of fight or flight that stunts his ability to assess the consequences of his actions in the long term and damages his ability to relax and enjoy things in benefit of staying alert for immediate threats. And he's been in this state for so long that he's not even aware of it. Because poverty and violence are traumatizing, and there is plenty of that in Hillrock Heights. 
You can just read this first paragraph instead of the long ass essay I wrote because I was bored in a 3 hour flight. Also probably a plane is not the best place to redact things that make sense, so this is why this has been edited. Beware that I did not have internet connection so some of the wording and terms might be wrong because I was translating in my head to my best ability. More under the cut
The survival mode activates when you are in grave danger, allowing you to stay more alert of threats and react faster. It rushes you with cortisol and adrenaline, and activates your fight or flight instincts. It's supposed to last only while the threat is active, not stay on at all times. If it does, there are consequences.
It is hard to get out of the survival mode, because most of the time you are not even aware of it, but it's even harder if most people around you act the same way.
Having the survival state as default is what happens when humans stay in traumatic and stressful situations for too long. It affects your ability to priorize your well being in the long term, and analyze the lasting repercussions of your actions, focusing instead in immediate threats and rewards. After all, what's the point in focusing in long term goals if you don't survive long enough to reap the benefits? Robbie does have long term goals (getting out of Hillrock Heights, dating Lisa), but he is terrible at assessing the consequences of his choices in the long run.
Being stuck in survival mode also damages your ability to just relax and enjoy things, because if you chill too much you might miss the threats around you. Because your brain evolved to priorize making sure you stayed alive over making you happy.
Poverty on itself is already traumatizing. The stress of not knowing if you'll be able to pay rent, meds or grosseries takes a toll. But Hillrock Heights is actively dangerous. There is gang violence. Gunshots are a common thing. People, even young people like Robbie, die on the streets. With the rampant drug trafficking I'm 100% sure that at this point most people know or has heard of someone who has died of overdose. You gotta learn to be alert and pay attention to your surroundings, because you don't want to mess with the wrong people or be at the wrong place at the wrong time.
There is this collective trauma and shared desperation that gets ingrained in the culture of places like Hillrock Heights. There aren't a lot of opportunities there, so you learn to take what you can get. You keep your mind fast and your hands even faster, because if you don't take the chance somebody else will reach it before you do. You'll think about the details later because if you stop to think now, that  rare, shining opportunity might be gone forever. It's a ruthless, dog eat dog world.
So if you look at it that way, I think it makes perfect sense why Robbie joins that race. The prize is unusually high and there is a car in Canelo's that just happens to be good enough for him to actually give him a chance at winning. When is he gonna have an opportunity to get his hands in that amount of money ever again? So of course he "borrows" the drug dealers car to participate in the very probably drug dealer sponsored race. He'll think about the details later, once he has the money.
And then everything goes to hell.
Even his reaction to discovering that he's possessed makes sense. He has powers now. That gives him  an unique advantage over everybody else. Of course he's going to use it to try to improve his and Gabe's life, he's trying to climb from the bottom of the pit of the social ladder so they can have better chances at surviving.
I think this mentality explains Robbie's choices, but also some of Guero's and his friends. And it's not even a conscious thing, most of the time.
Other people have already pointed this out, but it seems that while Robbie takes pride in cooking for Gabe, he sees food more like fuel when it comes to himself. Relaxing and just enjoying things is hard for him and I think it also shows in his relationship with Lisa.
Speaking about that. He's, at this point, walking around the neighborhood beating the shit out of gang members. He transforms into a demon. He's possessed and his car is haunted. He knows now that the asshole that lives in his head cannot be trusted. 
Not the best grounds to start a relationship. It doesn't even seem like he's planning on ever opening up to her about that, to be honest, because when Lisa tries to reach him at his house and connect with him, he's emotionally unavailable. 
How are you even gonna make that work in the long-term, Robbie?
Well. He is not planning long-term. Not that he wouldn't want to be with her long-term, mind you. He is just way too focused on the immediate threats. Like Eli, pestering in his head. So he doesn't even get to relax and fully enjoy his time with her most of the time, because he's busy arguing with Eli, who won't shut up. 
I think that deep down he knows that his circumstances are not the best for a relationship. That's one of the reasons why he hasn't made a move, as she puts, even if he likes her and is starting to realize that she likes him too. But when she basically throws herself at him... Well, that's too good of a chance to say no. He really likes her, and maybe he can get to enjoy this tiny beacon of happiness in the middle of all the despair. He gets to "have something for himself". Maybe he can have this, just for once. 
He'll... figure out the details later.
So yeah, he's a traumatized young man, surrounded by traumatized people. Because poverty sucks.
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