#because truthfully everything IS meh until my crazy emotional disregulation goes whack and suddenly you’re the equivalent of my saviour so
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It always feels so Stockholm Syndrome-y whenever I find another Eris on this app and think they’re cool 😭
#problem is then I try following them but they don’t follow back so I’m like okay fine 🙄#I think my subconscious is looking for trouble ngl 😞#dora daily#not even my subconscious it’s my actual conscious cause listen whyyyyyyy#why#did I weirdly hope she would ask for my new blog#SEDATE MEEEE#ughhhh I am still not out of the wood works yet HOW LONG IS THIS GONNA TAKE#ngl none of yall are interesting without me making you interesting#because truthfully everything IS meh until my crazy emotional disregulation goes whack and suddenly you’re the equivalent of my saviour so#trythfully she isn’t all that and when I would re read the messages I’m like HUH why did I like her sm this is weird#then I remembered I was heavily suicidal and attempting to recover from that period whilst subconsciously digesting every bad thing my mum#was putting me through#nobody or rarely do people get groomed if they’re normally functioning they have to be vulnerable to an extent#unfortunately for myself and Eris she happened to be one of the first and very few people who actually talked to me back then#so no wonder I got attached so much LOL#to the point I disgustingly look for her in other things 👹👹👹👹 FMLLLLLLL
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