#because this would lead to some batshit strategies | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

smallblip · 4 years ago

Text

You asked, I deliver! Part II of Accidental baby acquisition💖 I lost one of the asks 😩 but anon who asked about baby Udo, I named the baby in your honour! Saddle up cowboys! I’m not good with sequels but here we are-

Babygate:

the scandal that implies that a certain boy band member cheated on his partner (another band member) and had a kid even when the mom was never pregnant.

- urban dictionary

—

Reiner thinks things are alright. Life is definitely picking up. Pieck still sends him excerpts of her dirty fanfiction to proofread, Bertholdt is still doing all he can to “retire at 30”, Annie might have eloped with said boyfriend. But he’s seeing Porco on the regular now, he’s really cute, he’s got a nice ass. Reiner can’t complain.

He’s also recently donated his Levi Ackerman standee. Only because it’s getting increasingly hard to reconcile the fact that he has a life sized cutout of his colleague’s boyfriend in his room.

What he can complain about is said colleague (and friend) dropping bombs on him. He’s one of the moderators of one of the bigger No Name servers. Sometimes he wonders if that’s a conflict of interest because, well, he knows the guy on a first name basis. But today he has other concerns. He sees his notifications blowing up and decides to go on the No Name server. And lo and behold. There’s a paparazzi shot of Levi and Hanji with a stroller taking a walk in a new channel called “MYSTERY FAMILY?”.

He cancels his plans with Porco. “Don’t text me for the next few hours, got a fire to fight.” He clicks send, and feels kinda bad, so he sends Porco really dank meme to appease him. (That doesn’t stop Porco from doing exactly what Reiner told him not to do and demanding an explanation every five minutes).

He forces himself to take a deep breath before texting Hanji-

“Hanji… I don’t mean to be rude but…

WHAT THE FUCK?”

—

So here begins babygate. A conspiracy theory that took the Internet by storm.

“Levi Ackerman had a secret marriage! He was keeping this from us from the start!”

“It’s a publicity stunt to keep No Name relevant during their hiatus!”

“It’s an elaborate scheme by the company to punish Levi for announcing the hiatus without their knowledge!”

“Levi’s mystery partner was sent by the lizard people to take control of his mind and produce half-lizard, half-human hybrid babies to take over the world! What a bitch!” (This is Hanji’s favourite).

And the internet’s favourite- this is all an elaborate scheme to cover up the scandalous love affair between Levi and Eren- the band’s guitarist.

“What the fuck?” Levi had said during dinner once, to which Reiner had to swallow his food and pretend he never read or actively looked up ereri content. Yes. Reiner knows the name of their ship.

Levi hadn’t been too worried before, but when pictures of them shopping for baby stuff leaked online, something snaps. Something snaps and Erwin tells him he needs more time to figure out the biggest PR crisis in No Name history.

It’s Levi. Levi is the PR crisis.

So in the meantime, no shock reveals, no more social media, (if possible) no more leaving the house with pregnant girlfriend in tow. “Don’t do ANYTHING.” Erwin had said, “especially not you!” Erwin had directed that at Eren, who suggested he makes an announcement. Erwin shudders. He remembers all the past scandals they got themselves into just because Eren, bless him, didn’t know when to shut up.

“I’m sorry…” Levi says to Hanji when they’re cuddled up on the couch watching a documentary on whale migration.

“Huh?” Hanji says, voice muffled through her incessant sniffling because “whales are delivered tail first, Levi! They wear their mothers like hats!”

He apologises for putting her through the mess that is him and his job. And Hanji smiles at him. He wonders if their kid will look like her. He’s hoping they would.

“Levi…” Hanji sighs, taking his face in her hands, “that night at the bar I thought to myself ‘this man has a face I would risk it all for’… I think this counts within the realms of ‘all’”

Levi scoffs, but a smile is threatening the corners of his lips. Erwin’s nagging over the phone fades a little and he sinks a little lower into the couch. He sighs one more time for good measure before saying-

“So… you wanna know which my favourite babygate theory is?”

—

“And you’re really not bothered by all this?” Reiner asks, in an emergency meeting that he had scheduled into her calendar. He hates that he’s packing things into her already busy schedule when she’s about to pop but, he figures it’s better now than when the baby’s actually out. He had booked a meeting room and everything, figuring if he projected some of the crazy shit they’re saying on the fan boards up on screen, Hanji would start taking this seriously. Because if Reiner knows anything, it’s that the fans will do anything to keep their ship afloat.

He scrolls past another post on the lizard people and Hanji gets him to pause.

“I mean… A little?” Hanji pinches her fingers together.

“Hanji…” Reiner sighs, “you and Levi discuss and rate babygate conspiracy theories you find online I don’t think you’re taking this seriously at all…”

Hanji looks at Reiner- an absolute state of panic. And she considers panicking for a moment. She’s read articles dissecting babygate and although they’re absolutely batshit, Hanji appreciates how well-researched they are. Which is a little scary. To be fair to Levi, he’s been trying to get her to worry. “I can’t keep you safe all the time, you have to be careful” like he’s going off to war somewhere. But it’s not in Hanji nature to worry about things like this. She’s a researcher at a lab who lived an ordinary life up until the point the universe hit her with a-

Sike! Levi Ackerman is your baby daddy! What are you gonna do about it?

And now she knows what headcanons and lemons are, and she really doesn’t know what to do with that knowledge. So Hanji decides, she’ll do nothing. She’ll go on indulgently long walks Levi in tow, she’ll talk his ear off about work. And like a good girlfriend, she’ll listen to his demos (and enjoy them) and tell him “are you sure anger rhymes with danger?”.

“I don’t really know how to worry about anything beyond our samples getting contaminated…” Hanji says, sheepish. Reiner sighs. He doesn’t want to be a wet blanket on Hanji’s life. He wants to be fun Reiner. Cool as a cucumber. Reiner who manages to make it through dinner at Hanji’s without having to excuse himself to hyperventilate in her bathroom because Levi is right there. And he’s so afraid that he might just be able to read his mind and find out he had looked up Levi Ackerman x y/n fanfiction once in his foolish youth (youth being approximately four months back)

Reiner shudders.

“Yeah okay… That’s um… That’s cool… Right?” He says.

Hanji shrugs.

—

So Levi Ackerman is your baby daddy. Now what?

You go into labour of course, with a matter of fact- “oh. Look Levi. The water broke.” All while refusing to leave the house until you demolish that amazing sandwich he made for you. You go into labour and you yell and grunt like a beast as you squeeze the life out of your baby daddy because he kinda deserves it. You both kinda deserve this pain. Take it as heavenly punishment for being horny and stupid if you will.

And in the middle of it Hanji thinks huh, this feels like a mix of a reality TV show from MTV and a badly written fanfiction. Except Hanji isn’t a teen mom and she’s too old for self-insert fiction that involves a lead singer of a popular band.

But Levi is here, and he doesn’t complain one bit even though he looks like he’s about to pass out. So as far as drunken one night stands go- this is pretty damn aspirational.

The baby enters the world with a huge cry.

“Kid’s got a huge set of lungs…” Levi says, but his own voice is quivering.

“Just like her dad…” Hanji smiles.

As he watches Hanji fall asleep with their baby on her chest, Levi thinks fuck it. Fuck keeping this under wraps. Fuck the fans and them enjoying how Eren gets on his nerves. Fuck Erwin and his “Levi. You’re giving me a headache. You are the cause of this headache.” Because the baby has Hanji’s nose and his eyes and he loves them more than anything in the world.

He snaps a picture of them and tags bigdaddyzoë-

“Welcome to the world, my love.”

—

Reiner can’t help the tears that well in his eyes after seeing the picture Hanji had sent him of the baby-

“He says hi to his favourite uncle!” Was the caption, and Reiner could only reply with a crying cat meme and an incoherent text that Hanji favourites.

He’s on the bus on the way to the hospital when his phone buzzes incessantly. It’s Porco.

“REINER WHAT THE FUCK.”

“LEVI ACKERMAN IS HANJI ZOË’S BABY DADDY?”

“HANJI ZOË MY PHD SUPERVISOR?”

“LEVI ACKERMAN OF NO NAME?”

“REINER WHAT THE FUCK?”

He sends a reply at the entrance of the hospital-

“Welcome to my world”

—

Reiner thinks things are alright. He’s one of the moderator of one of the bigger No Name servers, so he can block and remove people at his discretion. Some days he lets it get to his head. It makes him feel like a king. But today, he’s putting out fires.

Erwin decided their PR strategy was absolutely no strategy, because “they’re zooming in on the pixels Levi. Once they doubt the pixels, they won’t believe anything we’re saying”. With that. Babygate has officially taken on a life of its own. Eren still sends Levi babygate articles to annoy him, and to Hanji because she asked very nicely. Hanji thinks Erwin’s strategy makes sense, Levi thinks it’s just lazy. But Erwin framed a certificate that says “survived a PR crisis (sort of)” that Hanji had insisted be hung up on their wall, so that closes one chapter. Besides, Eren has been spotted going out on dates with a mystery girl. Which has the double effect of diverting attention away from Levi and exacerbating babygate because “see? Told you the company’s doing all they can to prove they’re not together!”

“Can’t you keep it in your pants?” Levi had thrown at Eren, to which he had responded cleverly with a-

“Could’ve said the same for you!”

Touché…

“See? That can’t be Levi! Look at how he’s smiling!”

“That can’t be a baby! Looks like an animatronic to me!”

“Do they even make animatronics that realistic?”

Reiner pins his “no slander” rule- one day they’ll get it. Or at least he would’ve gotten rid of all the people that don’t.

“Who’s this bigdaddyzoë anyway?”

“Maybe she isn’t real? Company probably invented her…”

“Heard she’s a crazy groupie who got knocked up…”

“Heard she’s hot…”

… several people are typing

—

“So… I heard from Reiner you were defending my honour in the server?” Hanji quirks an eyebrow.

Levi shrugs. Whatever goes down in the server stays between Leviackerman173810 (leviackerman and all 173809 permutations of said username had already been taken) and the hundreds of people who haven’t quite figured out he’s the real deal. Besides, Erwin has issued him three warnings so it’s best to lay low for now.

“My hero…” Hanji chuckles, pressing a kiss on Levi’s head. Below them, baby Udo wriggles and yawns against the fabric of Levi’s shirt. Cute.

So Levi Ackerman is your baby daddy. Now what? You look at your son and know he’s going to break hearts like his father of course. And if you’re Levi, you pray to god he never asks about babygate because Hanji has read up enough about it to be considered a connoisseur.

One day the internet will break when they find out the identity of bigdaddyzöe. But for now baby Udo has his parents wrapped around his tiny fingers and he doesn’t quite understand the concept of him being the spawn of every typical band member x y/n fanfiction. Or the centre of a very popular, very absurd, yet strangely believable internet conspiracy theory. Or the canon plot that has sunk one of the biggest No Name ships. And that’s okay.

#babygate was a 1D conspiracy theory #levihan #whoopwhoop!#levi x hange #levi x Hanji #Drabble #inbox #anon #mine #again Pieck is me #un beta-Ed I’m sure it’s full of mistakes #shingeki no kyojin #Levi Ackerman #hange Zoë #celebrity au

139 notes · View notes

bluest-uwu-blowfishes · 4 years ago

Text

ok so hc that the scions have board game nights like, tataru will be like "y'all need to rest" and stuff and the scions want to spend time together bc found family and all that but they really shouldn't take a full-blown day off because the world could start imploding at literally any second, and also they're all giant nerds so like once or twice a moon they'll have a board game night they'd probably mostly play hidden role games or trivia i think, because they're giant nerds (and estinien just likes lying and fucking with them). anything where some people have some information and some people don't. basically almost anything that polygon has played on overboard.

~more under the cut (character specifics)~

ALPHINAUD obviously would be super strategic about everything and probably be fairly competent, but in games where you have to try to read other people and their motives he can kinda fall into galaxy-brain traps where it's not as complicated as he thinks. In games with a "bad guy" role (like in mafia) it's pretty easy to tell when he's one of the "bad guys" because it doesn't seem like he's as eager for information as normal. lil bit to competitive but it’s all in good fun ALISAE stumbles ass-first into gaslight alley (where alphinaud and esitinien are waiting for her). she generally doesn't want to think that hard about stuff because she already has to think under normal circumstances (well, what's normal for them) and this is supposed to be her break. it's not exactly difficult for her, she just doesn't feel like it. accidentally says stuff that makes her seem guilty when she's innocent, and the inverse is also true. will go for the most batshit strategies just to see if they work. it's called "science," alphinaud G’RAHA will get accused by doing literally nothing. just, sitting there. we all know he's bad at lying unless he's been perfecting his deception for literal decades, and even then it's only okay to good. it won't even be anything specific when he's the "bad guy," sometimes he seems too bummed out and someties he's too gleefully malicious, but it's painfully obvious and very poorly excecuted. over time he gets harder to read because he begins perfecting always just being "like that." probably figures out who the murderer is in Clue right as alphinaud's about to open the envelope. THE WARRIOR OF LIGHT is obviously going to be vaguer/varried, but i think that in general they would have an excellent poker face when they want to (*glances at ARR*). gives nobody any information at any point ever about anything, quietly puts together as many pieces as they can. switches wildly between not talking at all and talking a lot (yet still not give any info??) with no correlation between that and whose side they're on. in performative/roleplaying games they can deadpan almost anything URIANGER is just there for the drama. about to win? he will purposefully temporarily screw over his team just because. overly dramatic about everything. perfect for roleplaying games. actually really good at most games but almost never wins because he gets greedy trying to see how long he can lead them on with his bullshit, and someone (usually aphinaud) figures everything out and steals the win out from under him. THANCRED isn't typically a suspect for anything. nobody 100% trusts him, but no one outright thinks he's the imposter or whatever. he'll make some jokes and generally be fairly chill about the whole thing, and overall there's a 50/50 chance that anyone will call him out on his bluffs. will occassionaly go for the most batshit strategies that somehow always work when he tries them. has threatened to quit the scions when he feels betrayed. will start singing if it's even slightly appropriate Y’SHTOLA is too competent for all this. she has fun and will sometimes get involved, but she's mostly an observer. there's a solid 10% chance that someone will figure out she's the traitor/imposter/werewolf/etc. pretty good at bluffing and somehow simultaneously seems to never be on the bad guy team and also always be on the bad guy team. a true neutral ESTINIEN is pretty easy to read if you know what to look for. he seems to be smiling (smirking) more when he's the bad guy. it's because he knows that he'll win by screwing over everyone else, and that's fun. mostly observes (or seems to be observing) regardless of what role he has in a game, though if someone says something slightly stupid or suspicious he'll point it out very quickly without drawing too much attention to himself. KRILE joins when she can but isn't usually there or is usually happy to just watch, though she always makes a point to see how much she can mess with alphinaud specifically. she doesn't care about winning (although it's always nice), she just wants alphinaud to lose. TATARU mostly watches on the sidelines but also joins sometimes, and becomes actively malicious for the duration or the game. absolutely brutal. she won't win, but she sure as hell will betray each and every one of them at least once, and each in a slightly different way. honestly kinda impressive they would also sometimes play board games back on the First! RYNE is an actual deathtrap. "look, she's so sweet and innocent, she hasn't done anything to inflict suspicion upon herself <3" NO. she has, you just all ignored it. don't trust her. what are you doing. no stop. she's lying. oh god, they're all dead now. what did i tell you. she won't win most of the time, but she'll manage to royally screw over at least half of the crew. they all know this, yet keep falling for it. thancred's always the first victim. he never learns (might add more later)

129 notes · View notes

murdershegoat · 5 years ago

Text

(inspired by this // on ao3 // ko-fi)

she’s had the voice in her head for as long as she can remember

well, it’s not exactly a voice, more just like a really strong, disembodied feelings that echoes loudly in her head and body. like, it’s not her gut feelings, it’s an outside force and it’s loud and sometimes scary.

so whatever she calls it a voice when she’s explaining it to others.

this voice, it guides her decision making. it’s not an exact science (yet) but if she thinks in her head ‘i’m gonna go get ice-cream’ the voice will either say WARMER or it’ll say COLDER

well, it won’t say it because it’s not a voice. it’s more like this disembodied feeling feels like it’s saying WARMER or COLDER and she’ll physically feel it as well.

if she’s supposed to get ice cream, she’ll feel a sudden warmth

if she’s not supposed to get ice cream, she’ll feel a sudden chill

she doesn’t know why the voice makes the decisions it does, but she has to assume that it’s leading her towards something, towards success or whatever

at the very least, she has to believe that it’s trying to keep her alive. it’s a survival thing. whatever it is, it’s kept her alive for 26 years and counting.

and though it keeps her alive, it doesn’t always save her from pain. the voice tells her kissing veronica sinclair in the horse stables is a warm idea and veronica ended up breaking her heart and humiliated her in front of the whole school.

when she was four, the voice told her to trust lillian. and that’s led to a whole life of pain.

anyway. the voice.

andrea is the first person she tells about it.

they’re hiking in the amazon during spring break. and, as happens sometimes in life, they come to a diverging path and have to choose. left or right. andrea looks at the compass. ‘it’s not working,’ she says. ‘how fucking convenient,’ lena replies. she sighs and steps to the left path.

‘we’re going left,’ she says emphatically as she feels a familiar warmth roll through her. ‘why?’ andrea asks. ‘i just have a feeling.’

only andrea isn’t swayed by ‘just a feeling.’ she demands more and she refuses to go left until lena finally breaks down and explains the voice

(not a voice.)

‘well what happens if we don’t listen to it??’ andrea asks after a barrage of questions, her analytical mind whirring a mile a minute. lena shrugs, ‘i dunno. i’ve never taken the risk of not listening.’

they go left.

they survive the amazon. the voice is always right.

‘you know,’ andrea says, her head resting against the plane window. ‘my nanny used to tell me stories.’ ‘isn’t that what all nannies do?’ ‘she would tell me stories about people having unexplainable powers or whatever, i don’t remember the details… but i remember her saying that the powers always lead people to the thing they need the most. and it could take months or it could take years but it’s a part of your soul, like, intrinsically in you.’

andrea’s xanax kicks in soon after that and she sleeps for the rest of the plane ride home

lena stays awake the whole flight, wondering what these choices are and what this voice is leading her towards.

the voice leads her through the end of high school and it leads her to MIT (fun fact: she’s never felt a firmer COLDER than she had when she held harvard’s acceptance letter in her hand.)

it really helps her in college. sure, she still makes a lot of what she deems voice-sanctioned mistakes (sleeping with veronica sinclair is at the top of that list) but her grades are stellar and she’s on track for getting her second masters and she has a load of friends.

and then her brother goes insane and tries to kill superman. the sky is red and lena stands in lex’s office overlooking downtown metropolis. ‘join me lena,’ he says. ‘help me and we’ll be unstoppable. we’ve always been a strong family but believe me, we’ll run this country together one day, i promise you that. all i need you to do is trust me.’ he holds out his hand

for a second, she considers doing it. she doesn’t want to lose her family. i am going to trust my brother.

the voice says COLDER.

lena listens to the voice. she always listens to the voice.

it’s the first time the voice has made her lose something - someone - as important as lex. it’s the first time she thinks that maybe this voice thing doesn’t know what it’s doing because it’s never hurt her like this before.

the fallout from lex’s breakdown feels cataclysmic. her friends stop speaking to her, her professors stop calling on her in class. she can’t even work at the library without being harassed.

and to top it all off, she becomes the youngest female ceo of a fortune 500 company. which means board meetings and strategy sessions all while writing a thesis.

but meeting jack spheer feels like finding a life raft in the middle of a ferocious ocean, keeping her afloat, letting her catch her breath. he’s cute and he’s funny and well-to-do, and he’s the type of person lena knows she should date and possibly marry.

jack is the second person lena tells about the voice. she’s scared because she isn’t sure he’ll believe her, that he’ll drop her like the rest of her friends have.

but jack, bless his heart, just asks a hundred questions. ‘so even things like which sodas to drink?’ ‘the voice doesn’t let me drink soda.’ ‘whoa.’

jack is the first person who’s not veronica sinclair lena tells her other big secret to. they’ve been out drinking and eventually they stumble back to jack’s place and she feels brazen enough to blurt it out while he makes her a grilled cheese sandwich. she doesn’t even have time to wait for the voice’s opinion; the truth just falls out of her, unable to stay contained any longer.

‘i’m gay,’ lena says. ‘and i understand if you don’t agree with that lifestyle, but i’m still the same person i’ve always been and i would like to remain friends with you.’

‘a person with terrible gaydar apparently,’ jack replies. ‘as the kids say, it takes one to know one. i would’ve told you sooner but… i’m sorry i didn’t tell you sooner.’ she surges forward and throws her arms around him, hugging him tightly. neither of them lets go.

the grilled cheese burns.

‘should we just get chinese instead?’

the voice says WARMER.

she’s scared of starting over in national city, but the voice in her head seems to think it’s a WARMER sort of idea.

so she packs her bags and jack says goodbye to her at the airport and before she knows it, she’s looking down at NC from her pristine white office. the CVs of two assistants she’s interviewed. ‘i’m going to hire jess chin-salva as my PA,’ she murmurs to herself. ‘WARMER,’ says the voice.

when jess tells her two reporters are at the door, the strapping frame of clark kent isn’t whom she is expecting. she also isn’t expecting kara danvers to follow close behind, kara danvers whose smile is much too bright and friendly to work for a hardened journalist, whose blue eyes twinkle with a kindness lena has seldom been gifted by others, whose biceps are clearly visible through the cardigan she wears.

lena doesn’t have a choice to make, and yet for some reason it screams at her. WARMER. WARMER.

and then it says something new.

WARMEST

the feeling won’t leave lena’s body, and she struggles to focus on the interaction with the journalists, but she thinks she’s managed to tell them the truth. she’s just trying to rebuild her family’s business. she just wants to do good things and make the world a better place. but it’s hard to focus on any of that when her mind and her body feel like they’re on fire.

it only dies down when kara leaves the room, and lena’s pretty sure that there’s something special about that woman.

except maybe there’s just something about the blue eyed women of national city. because later that day lena’s helicopter is shot down and she finds herself being carried to safety by supergirl and the voice goes batshit crazy again.

‘focus on the fact you’re about to die,’ lena tries to tell it, but it doesn’t listen to her. so instead, she doesn’t look away from supergirl’s steady, reassuring gaze until she flies away. and she wonders why supergirl is a ‘WARMEST’.

‘i heard you almost died,’ jack says when he calls her that night. ‘who cares about that?’ she responds, ‘the weirdest thing happened with the voice.’ she tells him of feeling ‘warmest’, of feeling it twice in one day with two different people, of how it refused to go away and occurred without any decisions to make.

‘ok i’m about to share a document with you,’ he says, and lena can hear him typing on his laptop. ‘there, open it.’

it’s a spreadsheet. holy shit.

‘this is every big decision you’ve ever made,’ jack says. ‘there are also some medium sized decisions thrown in, but mostly just the big ones.’ ‘how the hell do you know all this?’ she asks, shocked. ‘why else do you think i’ve been asking you about all this for so long?’ he replies. ‘every time you tell me something the voice says, it’s gone into this spreadsheet. now, i only have limited knowledge of decisions you made before you met me, but i’ve been able to put in a lot of them based on your stories alone. i thought, what better way for you to try and understand this than to put it into words you understand best?’

‘you’re phenomenal,’ lena tells him. ‘i just… i never thought of this. i just assumed it was all some unknowable hippy dippy nonsense.’

‘i mean, it could definitely still be hippy dippy nonsense. but still take a look at it, see if there are any patterns or anything.’

‘i love you, jack.’ ‘too bad i’m gay, huh’

lena sees a lot more of kara and supergirl, though never at the same time. kombucha dates with kara and supergirl swooping in to save her life every now and again. the voice isn’t as overwhelming in their follow up visits, though a pleasant hum of warmth resides low in her being whenever either of them are around.

maybe, lena thinks, it’s not the voice at all. maybe, she thinks, it’s about time she starts dating again.

but none of the women she sees bring the same warmth that kara and supergirl do.

the decision data that jack put together doesn’t seem to make much sense either. but she continues to add to it, bit by bit.

and then something weird happens.

‘you’re getting more potstickers?’ lena laughs. ‘don’t you have any self control?’

‘i’m only human, lena.’

‘i suppose i should believe you.’

COLDER.

COLDER? she’d never gotten a COLDER near kara before. and why? she shouldn’t believe that kara’s human? of course kara’s human! she’s just an awkward, sweet, kind girl from midvale. it’s not like she’s supergirl, for crying out loud!

holy shit

what the fuck

kara’s supergirl?????

kara’s supergirl. it totally makes sense. why hadn’t she seen it before??????? had she been willfully blind to it?

she made a fool out of me, lena thinks. i should hate her. but the voice says COLDER. huh. so hating kara is off the table.

maybe, she thinks, maybe i knew and i didn’t want to admit it to myself. because clearly kara doesn’t want me to know. and i don’t want to push her into telling me because i don’t want to lose her. i can’t lose her. because i lo---

‘i’m so fucked,’ she tells jack over the phone later that night. ‘kara is supergirl and she doesn’t know that i know and i--’ ‘what is it?’ ‘i think i’m in love with her.’ ‘oh my god FINALLY,’ he yells into the phone. ‘i havent even met kara and i knew you were in love with her. you know she’s all you talk about right? like, you run one of the biggest companies in america and you have a disembodied voice that lives in your head and a million other things going on in your life, and the only thing i’ve heard you talk about for months now is kara danvers.’

‘you did not know’

‘i really did. but im glad you know as well because i can finally present you with my biggest theory on The Voice.’

‘not a voice’

‘remind me what it was that andrea’s aunt or nanny or whoever thought it could be?’

‘that was a million years ago,’ lena says; she hasn’t thought about andrea in ages. she should give her a call. ‘i think it was something about… these types of abilities lead a person to thing they need most in the world.’

‘right. i’ve been doing a lot of new age reading and it hasn’t been pleasant at all and i sort of hated every moment of it, but i think i have some idea of what this could be. it’d explain everything.’

‘well then, what is it?’

‘i don’t think it’s the thing you need most in the world,’ jack says. ‘i think it’s the person you need most in this world.’

‘you mean like-’

‘a soulmate. think about it. somehow every decision that voice has gotten you to make has led you to standing in your office in national city where you met kara for the first time. and what did the voice say when you met kara, completely unprompted?’

‘warmest,’ lena whispers.

‘exactly. warmest. as in, as warm as can be. because the whole time, the thing this voice has been leading you towards is kara danvers.’

lena’s plan for handling all of these revelations is drinking herself into a stupor. and it’s truly wonderful for the most part.

that is, until she wakes up with a headache and someone pounding their fist on her front door.

‘wHAT,’ she yells as she throws open the door.

‘do you want to explain the voicemails you left me last night?’

oh shit. lena’s hungover brain processes that it’s in fact kara standing at the door. she ushers kara in and shuts the door behind them.

‘to be honest with you,’ lena says as she puts on a pot of coffee, ‘i think i’m still a bit drunk and i definitely dont remember what those messages said.’

you said you know i’m supergirl. you said you’re not angry at me for lying to you--’

‘oh that’s not so bad’

‘-- and you said you have proof we’re soulmates.’

fuck.

‘do you want to explain yourself?’

‘can i drink my coffee first?’

… kara watches her drink her coffee.

‘okay,’ lena says. i’ll explain but you can’t ask any questions til the end. deal?’ kara nods.

the third person lena tells about the voice is kara danvers.

‘my whole life i’ve had this… this sort of voice in my head. and when i have a decision to make in front of me, it says WARMER or it says COLDER. it’s how i’ve made every choice since i was four years old, from the clothes i picked to the type of coffee i drink to the college i went to.’

‘like intuition.’

‘not intuition. fuck. i shouldnt tell you any of this.’

COLDER.

‘well. guess i should tell you about this.’

WARMER

‘it’s not intuition. it’s not a gut feeling. it’s not a part of me. it’s something bigger and otherworldly and it’s been leading me my whole life to something… i can only assume something much bigger and more important than i am. except i also think that the thing it’s been leading me to is you. and you don’t have to believe me at all, and god, you don’t have to believe in soulmates but… but far out, kara. i’m in love with you. i’m so in love with you it’s insane. and if you don’t feel the same way, i understand, but please don’t shut me out. i can live without you being in love with me, but i don’t think i can live without you in my life anymore.’

they stand in silence, lena’s plea still hanging in the air between them.

‘on krypton,’ kara says softly. ‘there’s only one way to know if somebody’s your soulmate or not.’

‘how do they do it?’ lena asks, imagining a blood test or a swab or something.

instead kara takes a step closer to her and she puts her hands on lena’s hips and she presses their foreheads together and she says ‘do you feel it?’

‘what--’

but she feels it. a sort of calm washing over them both. the air stills and lena swears she can hear kara’s heart beating and she feels serenity like she’s never felt it before.

‘wow,’ kara says, and before she can stop herself, lena kisses her softly, barely. but it’s still a kiss.

and she can’t really describe it, but she feels the voice leave her.

‘i want to kiss you again,’ lena says. but there’s no voice that says warmer or colder. all there is is kara danvers, nodding her head and saying ‘then kiss me.’

lena has many thoughts about soulmates. she thinks if the universe gives you some sort of magical powers, it should also give you an instruction manual for them. she thinks her soulmate is the most perfect soulmate that’s ever been created ever. but this is the real kicker: lena knows that the voice may have led her to kara, but she’s the one who has to make sure she stays there. they have to put in the work together. love isn’t just a magical feeling, it’s building trust and learning to be selfless and letting someone into your life in a multitude of intimate ways. and now that kara’s in her life, in all of her wonderful glory, there’s no way lena will ever let her go.

#supercorp #supergirl #kara danvers #lena luthor #fanfic #my writing

787 notes · View notes

murdereraisuha · 4 years ago

Text

Actually, Jamil is Snow White

Now that I have your attention with my batshit theory, let me explain it along with my other predictions for the future events of chapter 5 in a 2,500+ word mess of an essay.

The past chapters have all correlated to the plot of the original Disney movie in some way. So how does chapter 5 correlate with Snow White? For the movie's story, it starts with Snow White living with her stepmother, who is vain, self-centered, and afraid that one day Snow White will surpass her beauty. The Queen makes efforts to suppress Snow White's beauty by making her a scullery maid, but Snow White does eventually surpass her. This causes the Queen to order her Huntsman to kill Snow White, but the Huntsman can't bring himself to do it and he presents the queen with a decoy heart instead.

What's interesting about TWST is that Neige has already surpassed Vil at the very beginning. Furthermore, rather than focus solely on his own beauty and beat down potential rivals, Vil attempts to nurture the beauty of the rest of his dorm and the VDC team. So how in the world do we correlate the events of the chapter to the original movie? Well, we know from previous chapters that the person twisted from a character might not be the one to actually take that character's role in the story. Though Farena exists, the one Leona tries to sabotage is Malleus. Though Rielle exists, the one Azul makes a special deal with is Yuu. Even though Neige has played a bigger part in the story so far compared to Farena and Rielle, he still might not actually be the Snow White of this story. So who are our possible candidates here?

As the person meant to rival Neige's cute appeal, Epel is the first one to pop into mind. Perhaps the NRC team's performance during the VDC goes well enough that Epel suddenly gets tons of popularity. The internet latches onto him, so much so that, at least temporarily, he ends up surpassing both Vil and Neige in Mira's beauty calculation. However, this wouldn't make sense. The Queen is supposed to hate and sabotage the Snow White, and Vil has no reason to do that to Epel after spending so much effort helping him with the express goal of having him beat out Neige. So who else?

While browsing Pixiv one night, I came across a funny comic (it was long ago enough that I don't remember how to find it again, unfortunately) where Azul actually did livestream Jamil's evil monologue in chapter 4. Rather than becoming a big scandal though, it actually becomes famous because of how good-looking Jamil is, so much so that Vil finds out about it because Jamil's name is the one Mira tells him when Vil does a beauty check. Vil proceeds to change his plans for the VDC by dumping Epel and choosing Jamil as the sole main vocal so that Jamil is his "poison apple" against Neige instead.

With the recent update, Vil's plan for the VDC is officially finalized, so that comic is firmly in AU territory. However, what if something similar happens? The NRC team's performance goes amazing. However, it is not Vil or Epel that gain attention, but Jamil, the 3rd main vocalist. Against Vil and everyone else's expectations and plans, the internet goes wild over this mysterious pretty boy, boosting Jamil into the position of most beautiful. Even Neige had to spend some amount of time getting gigs and whatever to attain his fame, but Jamil has done basically nothing outside the VDC and now he's suddenly the best... How would Vil feel about that?

With the whole trend of the previous overblot causing the next, this theory of Jamil = Snow White makes sense. Though they could always make it so it's Neige and Epel doing the stuff and then at the end Jamil delivers a speech or something that gives the final push to overblot, it would be a lot more interesting (and funny) for Jamil to be thrust into the spotlight earlier on and be a main reason for Vil's overblot.

However, all of this assumes that the beginning of Snow White correlates with the beginning of chapter 5. Let's consider that the beginning of chapter 5 actually correlates with the situation later in the movie when the Queen is plotting to get Snow White with the poison apple. In this situation, Neige would actually be the Snow White of the story. However, unless we pull some funky timeline stuff, the theory I've seen of Rook betraying Vil wouldn't happen then, since we're already past that point in the movie. So what is next? In the movie, Snow White bites the apple and falls asleep. The dwarfs return to their cottage and chase the Queen, who eventually falls to her death when a lightning bolt destroys the precipice she's cornered on. (Fun fact from Wikipedia, her scream while falling was reused for Sleeping Beauty when Maleficent gets stabbed by the Sword of Truth). Anyway, the dwarfs proceed to put Snow White in the glass coffin until a year later when the prince kisses her and takes her to his castle.

Welp, look here, we have the dwarves in TWST, so they could definitely fulfill the try to hurt Vil part here. But what would lead them to do that? Assuming that as RSA students they are heroic, they would hurt Vil if they felt that he had hurt Neige. Vil's plan for the VDC competition seems to just be performing like normal and hoping that their hard work and effort will shine through and win them the competition, so either something has to happen that causes a last-minute change to that plan or some sort of misunderstanding (Vil getting canceled) happens. How would a misunderstanding happen? It could originate from fans angry that Neige didn't win, but Vil has plenty of his own fans to counter that and make an even-sided battle. Some new falling out between Vil and Epel could occur, resulting in either Epel himself going and hurting Vil's reputation or someone else (the media or Neige) seeing Epel distraught and believing that Vil is abusing him in some way. If it's Neige that could be interesting since it'd kinda be a situation where Epel is Snow White and Neige is his Huntsman. Neige x Epel new otp??? haha anyway, there's also the possibility that the RSA students are not heroic, and the dwarves go and make rumors about Vil themselves as an underhanded strategy to give Neige the victory.

All this talk is making me forget about my boy Jamil though. How would he fit in here? Again, from the previous overblots, we know that Jamil will likely oppose Vil in some way. We have also established that this chapter 5's start = the Queen's poison apple plan's start, so Neige is the Snow White. The remaining roles for Jamil are the dwarves (unlikely since we have actual dwarves), the huntsman (unlikely since timeline and also Rook exists), and finally, the prince. Jamil x Neige new otp??? lmao anyway, What would this role mean for his involvement in the story? Well, the prince only shows up at the end to wake up Snow White, so that would make this a situation like I mentioned before with Jamil just showing up to do a speech or something that pushes Vil over the edge. Boring, what else could we do?

Well, what about the original fairy tale of Snow White? In there, the dwarves don't kill the Queen. Instead, she lives until the day of Snow White and the prince's wedding, where the prince makes her dance in red-hot slippers until she dies as punishment for trying to kill Snow White. Why would Jamil give enough of a shit about Neige to go against Vil like that though? Well, y'know what fuck it let's squeeze someone else into the role of Snow White. Kalim certainly has the hair color for it. Since Kalim is just one of the backup vocals and hasn't had much going on aside from his personal character development this chapter idk what Vil could possibly do to him. Perhaps something pertaining to his family's wealth and fame? Whatever it is, some sort of threat to Kalim would be enough motivation for Jamil to do something to Vil. Interaction between Kalim and Jamil would also serve to finish up whatever development is going on between them. Seriously bro I know Jamil was probably just stalking Kalim in that one episode to make sure he's safe but that scene is really haunting me WHAT DOES IT MEAN?

Whatever, let's keep this circus rolling with some Rook discussion! Again, we got the theory that Rook will betray Vil like the Huntsman betrayed the Queen. To discuss this idea, we gotta discuss Rook's motivations first. In episode 5-27, quoting from the translation on the wiki by Kanade Musings, Rook claims that "being a mere spectator to beautiful people and beautiful things provide [him] with such happiness" and he is "here to offer what help [he] can to help save beauty." However, he points out that "Vil does not need [Rook] to save him;" instead, what Rook wants "to protect is not Vil himself, but rather the 'beauty' he possesses." The chapter ends with Rook saying that the others would understand what he's saying if they encountered a "beauty that is blinding" and would "bring light to [their] lives."

So, with this information, would Rook betray Vil and why would he betray Vil? Well, there's the possibility that RSA's performance wows him and he switches to protecting Neige's beauty. However, this doesn't feel right to me. Neige is very famous. His first appearance was in a commercial that Cater got even when not specifically trying to find stuff on Neige. I would seriously doubt that Rook has not already done research into Neige and observed what beauty he has. If Rook doesn't already find Neige extraordinarily beautiful, I doubt that a single dance performance could transform his opinion of him. However, what if that was compounded by some loss of Vil's beauty? However, would Rook allow that to happen? He expressly said he wishes to protect Vil's beauty. If Vil lost beauty, would Rook really abandon him, or would he work to bring Vil back to his senses and restore his beauty?

Now, going back to the idea of Rook doing a betrayal, we already established way back at the beginning of this monstrosity (if you made it this far please take a hydration break or something alright? take care of yourself I love you) that Neige is not necessarily the Snow White of the story. So, we have the possibility of Rook turning against Vil on Epel's behalf, which... doesn't seem right. Idk it might be because I still just can't envision a scenario with Rook outright betraying Vil. Again, Rook has spent a bunch of time observing Epel and watching him grow. What could Epel possibly do that could mega boost his beauty in Rook's eyes? He's spent time observing Jamil too, though not as much as he observes some other people. Like, Rook is a hunter, extremely skilled at assessing targets and figuring out what makes them tick. For his opinion of someone to seriously change, it would require equally exceptional deception or change on the target's part. Seriously, why would he betray Vil?

Okay, how about we consider what exactly Rook finds beautiful. As we know from the auditions (ボーテ！100点！), Rook was able to find beauty in every person's performance, no matter how clumsy or unskilled they were. So, we get the sense that at the very least, Rook considers things beautiful that most people wouldn't consider beautiful. Then, what makes Vil beautiful to him? We know Vil is beautiful by normal person standards, but Rook doesn't go by normal person standards. Does Rook feel drawn to his determination? His power? Something we don't know about yet? I don't think we know for sure, so we don't know what it would take for Vil to lose beauty in Rook's eyes.

Well, there's a part of Rook that hasn't really come up in the main story yet: his fascination with the nonhuman students. This just brings up more questions. Since Vil is human... as far as we know... Rook's behavior towards him is motivated by something different than that which motivates his hunts, even if that something different is just a different way of being beautiful. ARGHH I DON'T KNOWWWWW we're going into his voice lines

Alright, ceremonial robes home tap 3 (from twstarchives): "There is beauty that some are just born with, but the beauty you work hard to achieve holds immeasurable power. Isn't that right?" Okay now we're getting somewhere, he appreciates hard work! Oh yeah didn't Vil say some stuff cause he felt defeated by Neige being better even though Vil put in all this hard work? The development of that sort of attitude would probably constitute a loss of beauty. Hard work would therefore also make someone beautiful in Rook's eyes.

So, who works hard? Yep, Jamil we're bringing you in again. Remember, a change is needed to drive the plot and prompt a change in Rook. Haven't we had a major change in Jamil's attitude already? Starting with having to funnel all his hard work into Kalim and keeping himself under Kalim, after chapter 4 Jamil is now channeling his work into himself and finally showing off his true talents. Given that Rook can't possibly stalk everyone in NRC in-depth, he likely doesn't have a complete idea of Jamil's capabilities especially given how Jamil was specifically trying to stay under the radar. This may give Jamil the possibility to surprise Rook with his full power, potentially shifting Rook's opinion enough to give him a significant appreciation of Jamil's beauty.

With all this information, I think I can try and build a rough simulation of events. So, the VDC teams do their performances and wow the crowd. In the meantime while the judges are deciding who wins, some shit goes down: Vil gets canceled or something, Jamil gains popularity, idk something with Neige & the dwarves. Vil's mental health takes a turn for the worst and he resorts to underhandedness. He enlists Rook for some plot against Jamil or Neige. However, Kalim gets caught in the crossfire. Inspired by Jamil's beauty and efforts to help Kalim, Rook ends up going against the plan and Vil. Vil overblots, blah blah backstory, then the judges release the results of the competition, and the winding down/aftermath/party time is the 2nd day of the festival whatever when the gang can go see all the other booths and stuff.

Even after all this I sincerely doubt my final prediction here will come to pass but y'know, all about the journey not the destination. Honestly, I thought of the title of this post when I was only partway through like "Haha isn't this theory about Jamil being Snow White so out there" but nope that's actually a foundation of my ideas now. What am I doing??? Anyway, hope you enjoyed reading this mess. Please feel free to message me or something if this rant gave you any ideas that you wanna share.

#twst analysis #twst #twisted wonderland #vil schoenheit #jamil viper #neige leblanche #rook hunt #epel felmier #twst theories

72 notes · View notes

ilikelookingatthings · 4 years ago

Text

Comment that I’m proud from youtube on Akatsuki no Yona Chapter 201 part 1

I think the thing thats gets in the way of your idea that Hak is basically untouchable or should be because if he gets hurt the people who love him will go batshit is that yona loves her kingdom as well. I definitely believe Hak is one of the top priorities(after all the whole reason the dragons were gathered by yona was to make sure hak doesn't die). Its definitely true that if they want to they could mess EVERYONE up and take over the castle if Hak is killed....but Kouka ISN'T in a completely stable position right now even before the murder pin the blame on yona game the new country is playing. If they want to stay safe from invaders they need to make sure kouka isn't temping to be attacked by other countries. its been shown multiple times that the dragons aren't invincible. they can't always be vigilant and yona and the dragons and hak have been hurt and kidnapped on multiple occasions.

Yona's choice to take the deal with kyek-sook to enter the castle so yoon could learn more medicine nd she and the dragons could be protected makes sense. If yona refused she definitely knew kyk-sook would end more people to kill them. she witnessed a crazed priest convince other countries to aim for her and the dragons. everytime they had thought they were safe something went wrong. yona got kidnapped and sent to the drug workshop before. had been sword slashed. they had to sneak around tae-jun's place despite his permission and zeno was shot by a arrow. yona had been kidnapped and if the country had gotten the other two dragons in that first run using yona as a hostage there was no telling how many of their own country men thy would have ben forced to kill. and yona has seen the level of obsession or interest in the dragons grow in real time and how it can be a nice flattering hopeful thing...but can easily become twisted or obsessive. everyone was even injured on some level before they entered the castle. for long run safety it makes sense to choose to go along wth kyk-sook so at the very least if they DO choose to leave again the hak kidnapped her and killed her dad rumour would go away. the info of the dragons already coming out but by going with kyk-sooky it was a way to control how the dragons are seen as well as hak.

though you also have a point that whether yona was unsettled or not she let kyk-sook have the advantage over her since she came to the castle and if she had pushed more things could have changed earlier. even if she knew if they left they would still be in guaranteed danger so felt they could at least try to make things work t the palace. and she understood why they wouldn't let hak in the palace near soo-won. it was annoying because we could see that if yona pushed more things maybe could have changed earlier...but she was also made aware recently that the dragons andher aren't invicable and one of her mentalities is to finally start understanding soo-won properly. even if another point was so yoon could get more education and books we have seen hak and everyone be aware there are guards watching hak since he entered the area.

but of course like stated here...kyk-sook seemed to keep looking for a excuse to kill Hak which was ALWAYS a dumb move because it would trigger yona and the dragons...but also the windtribe to turn against soo-won. like it makes sense to have a guard in case hak tried to attack the king but we know supposedly tha kyk-sook was trying to provoke hak with the disrespect of putting her in the queens seat which others would assume was a engagement type of thing and had people set up to kill him. and we know kyk-sook didn't prepare enough to deal with the dragons. and separating yona from the dragons and refusing to let them meet was ALWAYS going to be suspicious as fuck and caused them to want to find answers.

but also confusing because....if killing Hak was always a dumb move which had been mentioned by SOO-WON even back when they saved lily. and one of the majour reasons that kyk-sook decided on this plan to bring yona and the dragons into the fold was because he was so impressed with Hak on the battlefield yet we haven't seen Kyk-sook try to bring Hak involved with the army at all uptil now despite that having been part of his motivation. how much of a dumb move? if hak is killed it would certainly trigger retaliation from the dagons and the windtribe.....however its also known kouka is still recovering from Il's rule and Yona is not ready tolead a army properly or knows enough about the politics so it would lead to kouka's citizens being endangered as well which ky-sook knows yona wouldn't want as yona and the dragons have been protecting the citizens this whole time. kyk-sook has already seen yona willing to put aside the murder of her dad for the greater good of the kingdom. so I wonder if its a game of chicken.

kyk-sook is interesting because we know he IS smart and can be cold and calculative when it comes to things from the beginning.....but since the flashback I've been starting to realize one of his flaws is he can be overly emotional whenit comes to soo-won as well. likehow he had wanted to kill yona on the spot when he came across her during the potential war arc when she was trying to get soo-won to agree to a meeting with the princesses and realized yona had a scary amount of connections. I think he was really rattled finding out that dragons with SUPERPOWERS exist. and he is such a soo-won stan that Hak properly using that soo-won strategy during the war rattled him a bit. we know he was smart enough to know that letting yona and friends continue to roam free could cause issues because yona and dragons could be kidnapped by other countries again....but also the longer yona is wandering around the more followers and people who admire her pop up which could cause more issues when people start questioning WHY the princess is wandering around instead of at the palace and realize its because soo-won killed king il. so bringing her in could put those rumours to rest. smart move.

but reckless move was him trying to test the dragons powers and assume the dragons would easily fall in line and wanting to provoke hak so they could take out hak/get rid of the risk even though he had realized the value hak has.

we also know they didn't kill hak on the spot in public and soo-won's bodyguard had apparently been watching and let hak get near soo-won. and kyk-sook has been so on edge since finding out about the disease which he aparently hadn't known about at all that he almost considered Yona for a back up position even though WE know she was bluffing with a three day cram session.

from his reaction its possible he really was planning on Hak being killed for finding out as he looked really surprised to see Yona there with the medic(which by the way was my favorite detail because we know the medic, and kyk-sook were around soo-won since they were young. kyk-sook is firmly team soo-won but there are extra layers because our medic hates having been a unwitting spy which could have led to king il's death. and I think it was implied that yon-hi sent the secret message to king il through the medic. and why kyk-sook was still surprised by the 'betrayal' of the medic telling Yona. Hak's word about how he wasn;t killed yet.....it shows that they WEREN'T ordered by soo-won to kill Hak as soon as he got close to the king. or they LET Hak get close to the king to test how bad Soo-won really was. its possibly they let Hak through to try to trap him into this situation to send him to the frontlines.....but then again hak had already agreed to be a soldier on his own and kyk-sook DOESN'T understand Hak all that well(which is kindof ironic because Hak follows and respects Yona like kyk-sook respects Soo-won...or yu-hon really.

Its possible they were trying to figure out how much Hak really figured out or to kill him in private. make him....disappear~ without anyone knowing what they did to him. After all kyk-sook did seem shocked by how much Hak had figured out. and he was clearly projecting on Hak a lot because WE know Hak is clearly not happy about soo-won being sick....but kyk-sook's understanding of soo-won and hak's relationship is still elementary so kyk-sook assumed hak would be happy about it and didn't seem to plan for Yona to appear.

but then again this IS the guy who helped plan a cou and Hak was one of his motivational factors for making this deal to get yona and the dragons in the palace and its been weird he seemed fine with potentially tricking or getting hak o die at other points since yona entered the palace instead of finding a logical route to get the man to be a proper soldier for the country. like its possible its ego. kykyk-sook thinking anyone who doesn't sta loyal to soo-won is trash or dumb if they aren't going to fall in line. after all even joo-doh was trying to lecture hak about loyalty and wanted lip service when honestly hak has been the only one who has never broken any type of vow at this point...even if we know why the others were loyal to soo-won over king il. we have definitely been finding out kyk-sook is more emotionally driven that we had thought and he does over look very obvious character issues in himself like when he didn't stop driving his horse forward and almost hurt a little kid which had lilly and others looking down on the advisor and seemed to think he might reflex badly on soo-won. kyk-sook did try to have them not listen to Yona' words to get a real talk between soo=won and kourien because kyk-sook didn't like Yona having any type of upper hand and was alarmed and how they had walked into yona's plans so easily.

I can't help but wonder if Hak KNEW they wouldn'tb able to instantly kill him and that's why he risked going to check on yona and soo-won to get information despite knowing if soo-won WAS sick and hak founded out about it...it could cause problems.

#akatsuki no yona #yona #hak #soo-won #kouka #dragons #king il #jou-doh #akatsuki no yona chapter 201

2 notes · View notes

imagines-mha · 5 years ago

Note

So I know this is mainly for our beloved Assclass but, at any point in time because I need more content for my favorite feral copycat, could I get some hcs for Monoma falling in love with someone from class 1-a. I know it sounds impossible but like she finds his snark hilarious and she's always complimenting 1-b and sticking up for them if they need it. Man I would appreciate it so much, thanks!

Omg i LOVE this idea bro i migt actually turn it into a mini fanfic??? Idk yet but it was SO GOOD and fun to write!!! tysm for the request 💕💫 also i got carried away and totally wrote a drabble instead lmao SORRY DUDE

—Love Story- Monoma x reader—

♥️ Im sure i don’t need to highlight it too much, because we all fuckin KNOW.

Monoma is the most dramatic asshole to come from the show. Fr he’s gonna act like he’s living in romeo and juliet every night when he’s in his dorm alone it’s so eccentric like jusT TALK TO HER STOP BLASTING LOVE STORY BY TAYLOR SWIFT AT 3AM YOU HAVE A TEST TOMORROW

Before he knows he’s in love completely, he treats it like a fun game. He always wins at games, doesn’t he?

He doesn’t i have no idea why he still thinks he does wtf

♥️ You’re a new transfer student at UA, and are still settling into the school, meaning you’ve yet to see one of his acts of clownery; meaning he still has a chance

His classmates tell him to quit while he’s ahead. CLEARLY class 1-A have already warned you to avoid him, clearly you’re gonna know to just ignore him when he flaunts his worth to you.

Clearly, Monoma doesn’t listen.

His charm is good though, enough to be able to sweep almost any girl who barely knows him off of their feet in mere seconds. He knows how to script his praises, and ensures he’s done his research on you beforehand to personally detail the comments to suit your style

He has one plan: go and win her over with one compliment. Sweep her off her feet and ride off into the distance where 1-a and 1-b no longer matter and it’s just the both of you alone together i told u he was dramatic dude smh

He’s all prepared for the big moment: he has his hair all neatly done, making it certain he smells nice, slapping on a smirk with just enough attitude that makes it seem as if he wasn’t up all night planning for this exact moment. He��s readier than he’ll ever be

He sees you walking into school with Mina and Uraraka, chattering away, when he suddenly leans against the doorway in front of you, his voice already carrying on with a level of confidence you didn’t even know existed

“Forgive me if i’m wrong, but you must be the brand new transfer student? My, i knew you’d be pretty but i didn’t know you’d be this gor-“

“Don’t be a creep monoma-“ mina sighed, pushing past him and leading you through the door.

“That’s the monoma we warned you about” she laughed, “just don’t pay any attention-“

————————

He should have really been put off from then, but his positivity lived on, even tho tetsutetsu found him sulking in his room later like a 5 year old who just got shouted at by their parents

He’d plan his next strategy the very next day. So straight up flirting wouldn’t work. What now?

He sits and ponders for a while, and i mean A LONG ASS WHILE like two weeks, preferring to stay in the background and admire you from a distance rather than get all up in your face

It seems like a funny joke to his class, and they make fun of him for it constantly. He never has crushes, especially not like this. This is like a golden opportunity: they’re getting peace from his constant idiocy, you were already like their saviour

He’s never quiet, but now he’s almost nervous to speak incase you hear and think he’s dumb. He’s never so...not-annoying, but he doesn’t want to prove to you that Mina was right that day. He didn’t want to be just a warning to you. He wanted to be who you loved, who you yearned for at night, who you grasped when-

“You monologuing again?” Kendo interuppted with a humourous tone from his bedroom door while he sulked into his pillow

He let out a whine and flailed over onto his bed, covering his eyes with his hands

“I just want her to like me...” he pathetically groaned, and for a moment the boy who acted like he was miles above everyone else had succumbed to a normal teenager

Kendo figured she had to thank you for that later

After a small, late-night talk about the importance of being yourself and the unattractiveness of too much pride, Monoma decided that from here on in he’d be completely him. If you didn’t like him for that, then clearly you weren’t meant to be

But he really hoped you did.

———————

A week later, snarky monoma was back in action- and he spent the entire day of training relishing in his insults and cocky comments towards the members of 1-A

To be honest, he was having so much fun riling them up he almost forgot he was looking out to impress you. Typical Monoma.

That was until he saw you giggle at one of his snide comments made at Bakugo, reeling him back to earth immediately from his throne of false royalty

He looked around for anything, some sort of confirmation it was he you were laughing with and noone else, and when he saw Kendo nodding in support to him from the corner, he felt like cheering out loud

It only encouraged him more though, because his cockiness became unbearable to the opposing class. Luckily though, it became even more amusing to you

He was shooting out insults and taunts left right and centre, his eyes darting in your direction each time one left his lips and his heart fluttering when he saw your eyes searching for him at the same time

It was a small haven. Suddenly the two of you were looking for eachother’s gaze whenever someone from your class screwed up in some way, because you both knew Monoma would have something to say about it

You didn’t care that it was against your class either. He was a pain in the ass to them, snd you could see why, but you just found him hilarious above anything

After all, someone needed to put them in their place every so often

Soon enough, both bakugo and todoroki had clearly had enough of his witty comments, and stormed up to to him to “give him a piece of their minds”

After a small outbreak of bakugo’s screaming and Todoroki’s sassy additions to a nonchalant Monoma, you decided to step in

Not that you didn’t value your two classmates...but Monoma did have better comebacks...plus...he was kinda cute

You rolled your eyes and spoke up,

“Leave him alone you idiots- just because he has better sass than you both do doesn’t mean you gotta go all batshit on him” you rolled your eyes at them before stepping to Monoma

“I never knew you could be so good at riling people up-“ you smirked, noting his shocked expression before quickly adding,

“take it as a compliment- your class is lucky to have you-“

He was so awestruck he couldn’t find a word to say, leaving the entire place in stunned silence for a few seconds, before the feud calmed down and training resumed back to normal.

But It didn’t take long for Mina to tug you away to the side,

“Did you just COMPLIMENT monoma?!” She suddenly asked, her tone laced with shock

“Come on Mina he’s not even that bad-“ you laughed, blushing softly and gazing back to the blonde (who was still staring completely stunned)

“I...i can’t believe someone could actually stand him-“ she laughed with you, “you guys would totally make a cute couple!!” She squealed, receiving a smack on the arm from you with copious amounts of “shut the HELL up before he hears you!!!!” spilling from your lips

“Seriously though y/n- a girl from class 1-A and a guy from class 1-B..... the SCANDAL of it all-“ she dramatically grinned, gasping in fake shock, “and it’s not even just a guy...it’s MONOMA himself” she continued teasing you, laughing when you groaned for her to shut up because you totally didn’t mean it like that...did you?

Since when did your life become a shakespeare play?

—————————-

When you guys finally date, noone could really believe it. Monoma, for one, actually liked someone who wasn’t himself. And you...actually liked him back.

This was either a recipe for the sweetest couple in the world, or a recipe for a couple that could kill you and feel no remorse doing so.

But all that mattered to you both was that you were a couple. You loved him and he loved you too- and when you had that going for you, how much more did you need?

#my hero academia #monoma neito #class 1-a #class 1-b #kendo itsuka #mha headcanon #my hero academia imagines

43 notes · View notes

marblesarelost · 7 years ago

Text

Change Your Mind, Change Your Life

Chapter 7

She wasn’t surprised to see Natasha leaning against the wall outside her office at five o’clock that afternoon, half-smirking with worried eyes. “Kotyonok.”

“Tante.” That drew the smirk into a small smile as Natasha walked with her to the private elevator, both staying silent until the doors closed before them. Then ��Tash slid her hand into Darcy’s, interlocking their fingers. “He called,” Darcy said quietly. “At like, five this morning. To tell me what was going on. That he had to leave.”

“That was good of him.”

“Yeah.” Darcy bit her lip. “It sucks.”

“Yes.” The elevator stopped, and Natasha stepped out first, her grip firm, leading Darcy to the apartment she shared with Clint rather than going to Darcy’s. Clint met them at the door with Natasha’s vodka and iced glasses, taking Darcy’s bag and shoving her gently toward the couch.

“So,” Natasha began after all the glasses had emptied once. “The date went well?”

“Yeah,” Darcy sighed, holding her glass out for ‘Tasha to refill. “Really well. We…shit, I’ve got the party at --“

“Nope. Secretary of State canceled it, due to the new developments,” Clint interrupted. “Keep going.”

“We talked about getting together again later this week,” Darcy said after a second. “We had fun, it was a good time, I mean…I think he likes me. I think he really likes me.”

“Who could not?” Natasha purred. “You were lovely.”

“He held my hand,” Darcy added, blushing. “Took his glove off for the second --“ Clint choked, vodka dribbling out over his lower lip, and both Darcy and Natasha looked at him, waiting for him to breathe.

“Wait,” he said between coughs. “Wait, what?”

“He took his glove off and held my hand?”

“You’ve touched --“ Clint coughed again. “-- Victor Von Doom? You’ve touched his skin? He has skin?”

“Oh for God’s sake, Clint, he’s not Darth Vader,” Darcy sighed, but when she looked at Natasha, she saw how carefully blank her expression was. “What?”

“Doom doesn’t do that,” Natasha said quietly. “Doom never takes off his armor in public. Any part of it. I have known of him, I have watched him, I have studied him, at various times, for various employers, looking for weaknesses, for slips. Darcy. He never, never, removes any piece of the armor at any time. Not even in his castle. Perhaps in his bedroom, he is human, he must sleep, but…no.”

“Well, we held hands during the first act, and it was okay. Kind of weird, because his glove is…it’s metal, but it’s really super flexible. Not uncomfortable, it didn’t bother me or anything. Then I went to the bathroom at intermission with Jennifer, we came back, we all had some wine, we settled in for the second act…yeah. Yeah, he had his glove off through the whole second act. But it was dark, and pretty private.” Both the spies were looking at her now as if she’d grown another head.

“Well,” Clint recovered first. “So you guys went out last night and then…”

“Yeah.” Darcy nodded, slumping backwards against the couch. “Then I got a call at five this morning saying he had to go, that the New Soviet were pushing their luck.”

“And you didn’t come tell us,” Natasha said. “You just got up and went to work.”

“I asked if he wanted me to get Tony or Steve, he said no. That the Avengers showing up could make the situation even worse,” she sighed. “My hands were, they are, tied. There’s nothing the Avengers can do. There’s nothing I can do. It’s up to the Kremlin now.”

Natasha filled her glass again, raised an eyebrow at Clint when he pushed his glass closer. “You choked.”

“I was surprised,” he retorted. Natasha snorted, but refilled his glass. “Thank you.”

“It is after midnight in Latveria now,” Natasha said, picking up her glass. “Have you heard from him since this morning?”

“No.” Darcy tried to keep her lip from trembling, and thought she’d done a fairly good job of it. “He’s probably way busy.”

“No news is good news,” Clint added. “No news means he’s not out there on the front lines, no news means nobody’s infiltrated Castle Doom. Because if the New Soviet were able to get an assassin in there, they’d be crowing about it.”

“Were you seen with him last night by anyone?” Natasha asked suddenly.

“We were at Hamilton, ‘Tash, it was crowded as hell.” The spies exchanged a look, and Darcy looked back and forth between them. “What?”

“Take it that you were, then,” Clint said. “Listen, you don’t leave the building without at least three security agents for a while, okay?”

“What? No, we had one date, we’ve never been seen together before --“

“Crimson Dynamos,” Clint said brusquely. “You and ‘Tasha approached him and Namor at the party. You went inside with him. You came back out with him. You’re a legit target, Darce. At least three agents, I’d feel better if you didn’t go out without an Avenger or an X-Man for a while, to be honest.”

“There were other observers besides the Dynamos,” Natasha added. “I know there were. And you had a nice long conversation with him outside, in clear view, while everyone else was busy. I am not scolding you; I am pointing this out. They know who you are. They know he has shown interest in you, and they know that you are a member of our support staff. You are likely a high priority target now for an extraction and kidnapping team.”

“Christ,” Darcy muttered, holding out her glass again. “Top me up.”

“He has likely thought of this now as well,” Natasha went on. “If things went as well as you think they did, it would not surprise me to wake up tomorrow morning to see the building flanked by Doombots.”

“Oh, surely not, he’s got to know what kind of fit Tony would throw over that,” Darcy argued. “You want to talk about a pissing contest, Christ, Doombots versus the Iron Legion, Tony’d go batshit.” Natasha shrugged, sipping her vodka.

“Perhaps he will not send them overtly,” she said. “But if you do not hear from the Latverian Embassy offering you extra security within, say, the next forty-eight hours? I will be very surprised indeed. And what do you think that security will be made of?”

“Doombots,” Darcy sighed, collapsing against the sofa. “God. Tony will be livid.”

“Well, if nothing else, you’ll be able to tell just how much he likes you,” Clint grinned. “What would you say, Tash? Three if he’s really into her?”

“I would feel better if he hired someone, but yes, at least three,” Natasha said, stone-faced. “Perhaps the best of both worlds; perhaps --“

“Not Wade. Just not Wade,” Clint said, looking up at the ceiling and pressing his hands together as if he were praying. “Oh please God not Wade.”

“You’re both horrible,” Darcy grinned. “First, again, one date, hello? Second, he’s got a little more on his mind than me right now. Third, hiring somebody? Like who?”

“Deadpool,” Natasha said frankly, and Clint dropped back against the couch, shaking his head violently.

“No, no, no, no, no, not Wade, just not Wade, I don’t care who else --“

“I have heard that Creed is available; who would you rather, then, Deadpool or Sabretooth?” Natasha asked, raising one eyebrow. “The worst thing about Wade is that he talks too much.”

“Too much? He never stops!” Clint exclaimed.

“And Sabretooth is apt to lose his humanity and try to kill everyone,” Natasha snapped back. “Wade will shut up if you are firm enough.”

“What about LeBeau? I’ll call him myself, you’d like Remy, Darce, he’s long and tall and made out of sex,” Clint offered.

“Yes, because her beau is going to hire someone who would try to charm his way into her pants,” Natasha pointed out. Darcy sat back with her vodka, pleasantly buzzed, waiting for the two spies to stop arguing.

“Guys. It doesn’t matter because he’s not going to do any such thing,” Darcy said quickly when both of them had paused. “One date, you guys, I’m not a princess, I’m not anybody important. He barely knows my name.”

“Would you care to place a wager?” Natasha offered, and Darcy considered. If Nat was sure enough that she was willing to bet on it…because Nat didn’t bet unless it was a sure thing.

“Okay, maybe, but at best it’ll be a single Doombot. I actually think it might be one or two of his Latverian Embassy heavies, if anything at all.”

“We will see,” Natasha said, winking. “Probably by morning.”

Intelligence briefings, meetings with his allies and their generals along with his own, working out a cohesive united defensive strategy that would save as many lives and materiel as possible, calculating with his military advisors how much ordnance and how many super tanks and operations teams to drive them could be spared, as well as how quickly the reinforcements would arrive at their destinations, all these things had filled his time from the moment he had arrived home.

Now, however, all that was left was the waiting and the hope that the New Soviet would realize what a mistake they were making; the EU had already issued a condemnatory statement against the aggressive movements and escalation in Ukraine, the UN were trying to open up diplomatic relations. Hopefully, this would all have been for naught. For now, all that was left was to wait and see. He gave orders that he was not to be disturbed save for an emergency, and went to his rooms. He had been awake for over 24 hours, and though he could remain conscious and coherent for up to four days, he preferred not to if it was not necessary, even if it was only late afternoon.

He took a shower, soaked for a bit, then went to bed, closing his eyes and breathing deeply and rhythmically in order to invite sleep. Then Darcy’s features passed behind his eyelids, and he sat up, cursing as he picked up the phone beside the bed. It took several minutes for the international call to go through, but eventually she answered.

“Avengers Initiative, this is Darcy Lewis.”

“Darcy.”

“Victor,” she said, and he could hear the relief in her voice. Damn.

“I hope this is not a bad time,” he began.

“No, no, I just sat down behind my desk. How are you? Is everything okay?”

“I am exhausted,” he admitted. “And once we hang up, I intend on sleeping until either a servant wakes me, or I wake on my own. But I am well, so far.”

“Good. Stay that way,” she said firmly, and he had to chuckle at the cheek of the young woman giving orders, even faux-orders, to him. “Seriously, though, I’m really glad you called.”

“As am I. How are you?”

“I’m okay. I’ve got a little tiny bit of a headache because I drank too much of Nat’s vodka last night, fair warning, don’t drink with the Black Widow, she can drink anybody but Steve and Thor under the table.”

“I will keep that in mind. You said there was a function you had to attend last night. Were you able to avoid it, then?”

“Nah, it got canceled. The Secretary of State was too busy with the UN because of what’s going on over there. It’s okay, I didn’t really want to meet the president’s kids anyway.” He snorted.

“Inform me if the sons are rude. The daughter is much better bred; she takes after her mother, the first wife.”

“Oh, I fully expect Junior and Nimrod to be douchecanoes,” she said airily. “I actually got a gown that covers all the assets just for them.” It took a moment for him to parse what she meant, and his free hand grasped his coverlet tightly at the thought of either of the president’s sons being ungentlemanly with her.

“As I said, inform me,” he repeated himself, carefully keeping his voice steady. “There are certain business dealings with Chernaya that I will gladly interfere in, should they need a reminder of how well connected you are.” And that reminded him. “You have not left Avengers Tower, have you?”

“Not since yesterday morning, no, but I’m going to have to eventually.”

“If it would not be too presumptuous, would you do me the kindness of informing the Embassy if you do? They will send a security detail for you. I have no fear for you within Avengers Tower itself; even if they are called away, Stark’s security team and his technology should be sufficient.” Too, he would call Stark, he decided. A subdermal tracker somewhere discreet would not go amiss, if she did not have one already. She was, after all, an intimate of Prince Thor, and obviously a favorite of the team.

“If it will make you feel better,” she said after a moment. “Guess I get to tell Nat she was right.”

“I’m sorry?”

“Natasha and Clint said last night they thought you’d want security for me. Clint doesn’t want me leaving without at least three members of security, or an Avenger. I told them I thought that was a little…” she paused. “I don’t know, we’ve had one date, I thought it was a little soon for something like that.”

“In any other time, I would agree. But this is a time of hostility, and the FSB do not play by the rules.”

“You know the Avengers would come for me, right?”

“That is not the point. The point is that nothing untoward happen to you to begin with. You are a noncombatant civilian, but that will not stop certain agencies.”

“If it’ll put your mind at ease, sure,” she said lightly. “You’ve got enough to worry about right now without adding me into the mix.”

“Then I will make the arrangements momentarily. Thank you for understanding.”

“Oh, I don’t have any problem with being safe,” she laughed. “You’re welcome. And you should probably get some sleep, and I’ve got to earn my paycheck, so --“

“Of course. Was this a good time? May I call again?”

“Anytime, Victor. And especially if you have to go add a personal touch, okay?”

“I remember. Have a good day, Darcy.”

“Good night, Victor.” He hung up, called the New York embassy and gave the requisite orders for her security detail if requested, debated…it was still fairly early…and decided not to call Stark until later. Besides, if push came to shove, there were magical means of finding her. He was able, then, to lie back and eventually sleep.

The intelligence that came in overnight was not promising. The strengthening push into Ukraine, the troops now crossing Belarus, pointed toward the New Soviet’s determination to reconquer the smaller countries. Belarus could be forgiven; their position was unenviable, and while Victor knew they were playing both sides against the middle, he also knew that they could not possibly stand before the might of the troops currently passing through their country. He gave the orders for the immediate air transport of several brigades of Doombots to help defend Poland’s eastern border, with promises of more as soon as he knew more about the Ukrainian situation. He also gave the orders for the supertanks, already loaded onto the special express trains, and their operators to make the journey to Lublin and Bialystok for assignment. Those destined for Ukraine and Romania were already en route.

A teleconference with the generals, exhibiting the latest Doombot models and pointing out their strengths, took up a few hours, and then another teleconference with Chancellor Merkel, President Macron, and President Mattarella regarding the efforts the EU had made to convince Russia to stand down. He did not comment on the absence of Prime Minister May and President Trump; it was only to be expected, after the Brexit, and of course President Trump likely did not even know there were currently tensions. Nor, to be honest, did Victor think the man would care. Ukraine was far enough away that the U.S. could ignore it, though he had an idea that the First Lady was likely keeping a very close eye on the situation. She was from the region, after all.

Now he paced in his control center, waiting. He felt somewhat bound by his determination to change; were he the Doom of five years ago, he would have gone to the front and decimated the armies with a few spells, driven them forth from the soil of his allies and shown no mercy. He could feel the energy, taste the triumph…but no. “I am not that man any longer,” he growled to himself between gritted teeth. “I am better. I am stronger, I am more than I was.” But the words did nothing to curb his desire to see something destroyed by his hands.

He swallowed his irritation, and began reviewing the currently available freelance enhanced humans or mutants who might be acceptable to Darcy as a bodyguard. She could not be followed by a Doombot all the time, and while the embassy’s security was top notch, they were all human. He did not like their chances against more Crimson Dynamos or perhaps Black Widows.

Sabretooth was not an option, due to his instability. Certainly he was supposedly “cured,” but he had seen Victor Creed in his murderous frenzies, and he would not risk Darcy in that manner. Elektra was a possibility, save for the fact that she had a price of her own on her head, one that would never be called off. Deadpool was annoying, and too easily distracted.

He studied videos of the last current possibility for a long few minutes, the high angular cheekbones, the saucy grin, the insolent grace, the lean, muscular body. His upper lip lifted into a sneer, watching him attempt to charm every woman he met. Did he dare try to hire this one? What if Darcy found him attractive? What if, since he was unable to court her properly right now, she allowed that charm to disarm her? He pushed himself away from the control panel, paced the room again, glancing every so often at the loop of the man in action leaping to provide cover for a child, defending an elderly man, sweeping a handful of foes into unconsciousness with a few well placed blows. Finally, he stopped, folding his arms over his chest.

He was fond of Darcy. She seemed fond of him. They were not sworn to one another in any way, they had not even begun to scratch the surface of any type of relationship. Hiring someone to guard her was not for his benefit, it was for hers. Her association with him was what would place her in jeopardy; he was therefore honor bound to ensure her safety. Out of the available possibilities, this was the best option.

And besides, if she gave way to the flattering rogue’s charms, if she could not remember who had hired him and why to begin with, then it was simply not meant to be. He sighed, then picked up the phone.

The welding arc flashed blue, hotly hypnotic, as the Clash screamed about knowing one’s rights, the thudding bass enough to feel it in his feet as he worked, mouthing the words along with the song. He had just finished the line of weld when the song cut off abruptly, and he cut off the welding torch, flipping up his helmet. “FRIDAY?”

“Sorry, sir, but you didn’t hear me the first eight times I called your name,” his AI said. “Lord Protector Von Doom is on the line for you.”

“Oh.” Tony wrenched the helmet off, wiped his forehead on his arm. “How long do I have before Pep wants me for the dinner thing?”

“Two and a half hours, sir.”

“Right, and my alarm is --“

“For an hour and a half from now. Shall I put Lord Doom through, sir?”

“Yeah. Yeah, patch him in.” He laid his tools to the side, got a bottle of water from the mini-fridge and downed it, waiting.

“Mr. Stark.” Doom’s voice boomed, even when he wasn’t meaning to. He’d have made a hell of a front for a metal band. Literally, Tony thought to himself, grinning.

“Vic! Good to hear from you. How’s Europe?”

“Holding together for the moment. May I have a word?”

“Sure. You need a hand out there? I don’t mind,” Tony offered. “I owe them a courtesy call after the other night, to be honest.”

“I promise you, Mr. Stark, you are first on the list should reinforcements be needed. I’m calling regarding Miss Lewis’ current security measures.” Tony blinked.

“She lives in Avengers Tower, man, we’re not going to let anything happen to her,” Tony began, a low growl of discontent rumbling in his belly. What, he didn’t think the Avengers could keep her safe?

“I’m well aware, but she does have to leave the tower from time to time, Mr. Stark, and while your security teams are top-notch, they are human,” Doom said. “Humans, unenhanced humans, well trained humans, are very well and good against most of the FSB or human extraction teams. I am more concerned for mutant and enhanced threats. I have a bodyguard candidate in mind for her. I am calling to ask if I might rent the gentleman a suite of rooms in the Tower, so that he is always at hand. This is only temporary,” he added. “Until the unpleasantness here is over, and the New Soviet come to their senses.”

“Who’ve you got in mind?” Tony asked, taking another swallow of his water.

“Remy LeBeau. Gambit.” Tony choked, coughed, had to catch his breath.

“I thought he was upstate? In Westchester?” He said when he could speak again.

“No. He has left Xavier’s team, and is currently working as a freelance operative in Quebec City.”

“Not New Orleans?”

“I believe he is persona non grata in the Crescent City at the moment. Something to do with the Assassin’s Guild.”

“Yeah. Yeah, um. Let me put you on hold for just a minute so I can check the availability, okay?”

“Certainly.” Tony made a cutting gesture over his throat at one of the cameras, and Billy Joel’s “Vienna” began to play, signaling that Doom was on hold. “FRIDAY? Do we have anything?”

“The guest floor below the Avengers’ floor is currently empty, sir,” came the lilting answer. “The current market value for one of the guest suites is approximately $15,000 per month, due to the space, the limited availability of rentals in New York, and the location.”

“Okay. Bring him back on.” The music cut again. “Vic, you there?”

“Yes, Mr. Stark,” came the irritated reply, and Tony grinned to himself.

“Yeah. I’ve got some room, I’ll cut you a deal because it’s for Artoo. Eight grand a month, it’s a two bedroom suite with a hell of a view, access to the Avengers’ workout area and communal areas if he wants it. Comes furnished, top of the line electronics, utilities, cable, and delivery service included.”

“Acceptable. I will call you back after I speak to Mr. LeBeau,” Doom said after a second. “I deeply appreciate your courtesy in this matter.”

“Yeah, no problem,” Tony said easily. “Let’s do doubles next time you’re in town, me and Pep, you and Darce, huh?” A long pause.

“I have no objections. Thank you again.”

“Sure thing. Later.” He made the motion again, and the call cut off. “FRIDAY. Make sure one of the suites is deep cleaned,” he ordered. “I don’t know when he’ll show, so, let’s get on it.”

“Yes, sir. Shall I have groceries delivered as well?”

“No; wait on that until we know when. Work up an invoice for the Latverian Embassy at eight.”

“Yes, sir.” Tony hefted his helmet up, slid it back on his head, tightened the belt.

“How much longer do I have to play, FRIDAY?”

“Approximately one hour, eighteen minutes, sir.”

“Awesome. Bring back the tunes.”

“You have the right…to free speech…as long as you’re not dumb enough to actually TRY it!” The music picked back up right where it had left off. Tony grinned, flipping his hood down and re-lit the welding torch, bending back over his work.

...STAY TUNED, TRUE BELIEVERS...

#Victor Von Doom #Darcy Lewis #The Victor Von Doom/Darcy Lewis story that nobody asked for #@fuckyeahdarcylewis #@daniissuchadani #@subsilvernight #fanfic #Marvel #Avengers #Iron Man #Excelsior

15 notes · View notes

yes-crisitunity · 5 years ago

Text

"Science is science" and post-positivism

Dondelinger: Welcome to Remedial Science 1A. My wife recently passed away. I thought that maybe teaching would ease my loneliness. Homer: Will this be on the test? Dondelinger: No! Homer: Ohhh.

The Simpsons, Season 4, Episode 19 - The Front

In the wake of the Government's completely batshit herd immunity strategy collapsing under public pressure, you may have heard or read about how "the science changed".

Credit: @tristandross on Twitter

Let me be clear (obama voice), the media are totally complicit in serving out their lines as unfiltered propaganda, but also in trying to protecting the Government and it's positions as they became ever more untenable. But this post isn't about them (much). Honestly, I'm not really sure how to describe the content of this post.

I don't know how the average person concieves of public policy decisions, but this is my version. There are two very key philosophical underpinnings to making good policy decisions, ontology and epistomology.

Ontology is the study of the nature of being, becoming, existence, and reality, whereas epistomology deals with the nature of knowledge. Pretty broad concepts, what has this got to do with making policy and a public health crisis in the 21st century? Well during that whole neoliberal turn in the 70s (you hate to see it), these concepts fell out of favour and we saw the rise of "evidence based policymaking".

Essentially, once a problem is identified, evidence is used to formulate approaches to tackle it, with the decision based on weighing up such analysis. The implementation also generates further evidence to refine the process. This follows the model (i.e. fake bullshit) of the policy cycle. It also enables those in power to dismiss ideas on the basis they aren't evidence based if they don't fit within the dominant framework.

But this doesn't question what evidence is used, how it was collected, whether the act of gathering evidence had any effect on the data you are now using. I really think of this as very analogous to what we're increasingly seeing come out of silicon valley. It's been pointed out by numerous others the way that many apps out there essentially harken back to centuries old, racist, and most importantly debunked, concepts like phrenology. This is because they do not question their underlying datasets, and just assume they are right and true. Its a good example of unconscious bias too. Think back to when digital cameras became a thing, you might remember a number of stories about how the auto focus or face recognition wouldn't pick up people with darker skin tones. It's the same thing. This is because a lot of this "AI" and "machine learning" bullshit is taught on racist data sets. It's like the classic white nationalist "FBI crime statistics" argument. They simply don’t question whether their data is actually valid or not, or understand the situations under which it was collected.

So where does this leave us with policy?

Rather than a self-evident object, policy means different, and often contradictory, things to different people. Different understandings of policy lead to different ways to conduct evidence gathering, analysis, and implementation. This is where we introduce (post)positivism. The positivists of the world posit (lol) independence between the researcher and the researched.

Positivism treats the social world like the natural world, due to something known as object detachment. We all live in a world of meanings and symbolism, humans are self-interpreting. To understand ones intentions, you must understand the world through their eyes. So to understand decisions, you must understand the meaning behind them, what drives them. This is where post positivism comes in. Post-positivism argues that the sum total of meanings and symbols from the world we live in affect the researcher and influence what is observed.

The linguistic turn in western philosophy of the late 19th and early 20th century was replicated in policy approaches decades later as a response to positivist approaches to policy analysis. Known as the ‘argumentative turn' - it's an example of a post-positivist approach. It treats policy making as encounters between different viewpoints (and meanings) in relation to a particular issue.

But there's a major problem with the argumentative turn - despite its key insight of multiple, conflicting interpretations being simultaneously at play - it neglects power, i.e. why some viewpoints and meanings might become dominant over others, for reasons other than sheer persuasiveness

Another post-positivist methodology is ‘discourse analysis’. What you are looking to understand is how this technique can be used to reveal deeper insights into the making of policy. Note, as an aside, ideological values can be shared even across rival political parties i.e. the Conservatives and New Labour, the Democrats and Republicans, etc. This tells us analysis should not focus on ‘the end’ of the policy process, but decisions/outcomes throughout the process. (Consider, for example, how we analyse policies adopted in response to the 2008 financial crisis) Discourse analysis is concerned with figuring out how a given policy came to be adopted – i.e. to solve what ‘problem’, by whom, with what assumed theories (e.g. the idea of deterring smoking by raising taxes on cigarettes is based on the theory that if prices rise, consumption drops).

This is not to say that positivist approaches (e.g. using statistical analysis) are not useful, but we must be conscious about what exactly is being studied. For example, we can usefully track ‘poverty’ using numbers (wages, disposable incomes, cost-of-living, etc.) but it can generate viable policy responses only if we are certain what exactly it means to be ‘poor’ (Is it simply not having sufficient income?).

But, (neo)positivist (e.g. quantitative) approaches are demonstrably insufficient (even if it remains the dominant approach adopted by many analysts) and shows what post-positivist (qualitative) approaches are concerned to emphasize.

So, what of it?

Well, whenever people in the media or politicians use utterly facile phrases like "the science has changed", hopefully you'll have a better idea of what that science actually is, or means.

In the case of this coronavirus crisis, the science was always clear. The way it was interpreted and acted upon by the Government was a choice, and they’re scrambling to react now their old strategy was blown apart.

ENDS

#uk politics #government #coronavirus #corona #policy #crisis #postpositivism #science

0 notes