#because the world is unfair and now i have friends that i know ill baely contact when we leave for college and | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

notedchampagne · 6 years ago

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hey idk if its just me but does anyone else feel more connected to fiction over reality? because whenever im watching a tv show or movie or reading a book i feel completely invested and its like all of my emotional gears are 80-100% in, and then i catch myself thinking about it, like as if im there in the movie theatre and its all im thinking about while im doing other things and suddenly i check into life and i feel like ive woken up and im in reality now and over here there isnt going to be any adventures, or aliens, or defeating some large higher evil, its just me daydreaming while washing dishes and soon ill graduate and work until i die. and then when i finally ground myself after feeling spaced out for so long its draining and apathetic and i dont like it

#i mean ive always liked to read books since i could remember i was a good way of escapism #but now that im actually starting to have friends that i like to chat with and a life outside of the internet #i feel like my entire lack of social skills are hindering me and its because i never had the chance to have-#-ACTUAL. proper friends. id always just go back to books at the end of the day and now when i think about it its still sad #i never had a close friend for more than 4 years. i always moved away and there was never any effort to keep in touch #bc i was never close to anybody in the first place and the only person i remember stayed as my best friend for as long as she could died #because the world is unfair and now i have friends that i know ill baely contact when we leave for college and #im all just comprehending this now? i dont know why i think im just realizing ive always been so distant. or maybe im becoming more distant.#idk its a lot to ponder about JKL;SDAFJ please dont mind me the tags are my own personal screaming hole i dont need or expect anyone toreply #introspective timez huh #chat

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