#because thats how he Feels. like each public name of his is a rich interaction between symbolism and understandings and

[abyssalpriest]

I shouldnt be shocked that anything found on isha.org Knows but like. whoever did these Knows

like man. same hat.

thats just what he looks like ok and not to be biased but that artist is RIGHT

[shoezuki]

oooookayyy scrapped together thoughts of a Hades Modern Au here we go

world shit:

takes place in a massive city with some name or whatever. idfk. it big tho 

‘the underworld’ refers more to like. the criminal activities and things hades has a hand in. which is everything, from all businesses to the politics to the cops and everything. he stinks

most of the olympians don’t live in the city. some are influential people in bigger name areas. others are just like. kicking it somewhere 

most chthonic gods work for hades and live in/near to his own massive office/home, which is one of the biggest skyscrapers in the town

zagreus is always trying to leave town but either is thwarted before he goes too far down the highway or hades forces him to come back

Zagreus: 25, 5″5ft when wearing platformers. he’s somehow the cumulation of jock/rich boy/punk energies and really its a mystery how he pulls that off like. says eat the rich one second but also assumes an apple costs 10 bucks. he’s got the spirit tho 

Son of hades obviously. grew up in Hades’ ‘house’ (massive FUCKING skyscraper) completely raised by nyx. had vague memories of persephone when he was like 5 but didn’t think much of it until more recently. always knew nyx wasnt his birth mother, but only really knew persephone’s name and some information on her when snooping and finding things like marriage certificates that Hades hid away. 

Hades keeps control of him by providing for him, in a way. basically has control of all his money, which hades provides. He’s made it so zagreus can’t get his own job anywhere. either he’s rejected right at the door or fired. stopped once he realized a small business suddenly shut down after he got a job there. also can’t drive, have his own seperate bank account, all horrible shit.

The only thing he does have is that he has an appartment with hypnos thats grungy and small and really gross but its the only thing he feels to really ‘own’. 

Zag blows money constantly since it’s hades’ credit card. arrested a lot for vandalism, arson, public intoxication, trespassing, fighting, etc. he never stays more than a few days in jail, but his record has never been clean so when he attempts to hop on a bus or hitch a ride out of town, cops stop him and take him away. on the bright side one cop stuck to night patrol makes him some really good coffee.

Often gets into bar fights and skirmishes. more because he likes to fight than anything else. he once tried to make money off of underground fighting matches, but hades still caught onto that. he met Skelly through this. 

Hades: old as all fuck. nasty man. like 6″ft or whatever. He owns hotels, apartments, banks, and some factories for production of goods. high public opinion because he’s ‘charitable’ and dumps a lot of money to public infrastructures, police force, and particularly surveillance companies. This is more of a bribe than anything; first to know of the cops’ movements and has surveillance through practically the whole city. 

he sucks. persephone left him but they’re still considered legally married. No divorce has been issued, and hades has kept up the appearances that persephone still lives with him under the guise of a chronic health condition she has (multiple sclerosis) so she isn’t publicly seen. really she left his ass and owns a quiet unnoticed flower shop in a small town over.

Thanatos: 27, 5″11ft. Works within hades’ company, pretty high up too. manages finances, stocks, inventory, etc etc. basically has a handle on all money going in and out. tries to keep out of the less legal side of things but honestly he doesnt really have a choice in the matter. 

Extremely qualified for the position and honestly could probably do much better. went to some big name college far away for a long time. Studied business, accounting, economics for nearly 8 years. wanted to go into psychology, particularly developmental psychology, but forced himself to go into business.

He’s loyal to hades in a strange way. feels ‘indebted’ to him; for his job, providing his mother with a job, basically the reason they’re so well off. seems to think that he is the company’s head accountant less because of his own skill and because it was expected of him. undervalues himself.

He has only been back in town a year or so since leaving for college. part of his job is that he is forbidden from contacting or interacting with zagreus at all, with threats of losing his position from hades. Still, he tends to pull zag out of messes with cops or bar fights. zag doesn’t know how he keeps finding him or randomly appearing. 

unlike most other workers he doesn’t actually live in the ‘house’ and lives in a suite at another hades owned building. this makes it easier for zag to sneak into his suite and visit him at all kinds of weird hours.

him and zag have a more ‘new’ romance goin on. very tentative and unexplored and new. especially considering the circumstances they find themselves in. him and meg are great friends, in fact they are probably each other’s only friends. 

Megeara: 25, 6″3ft without her heels. Is the head of security in hades’ main office and has control over security services in other buildings too, although mainly stays in the house. also has the personally appointed position of keeping zag from leaving the house when he gets dragged back there. You can see how that goes.

Like than, feels indebted/sworn to her job, to a degree though. Will very much stop zagreus, only so that she can let him slide sometimes without suspicion or her job being threatened. Or if she just wants a good fight it depends on her mood.

was always interested in mixed martial arts. when they were teens she threatened zag to a fight. she ended up with a chipped tooth. later in life about when she started heavily piercing her ears she also got gold fang implants since the chipped tooth happened to be Right there. zag is weak to this. 

Never has left town or gone to college. she is the closest of the furies to nyx. both her sisters are in some field of the law enforcement, therefore acting as hades’ more personal ties into the police. She doesn’t get along with them, in fact feeling they’re way too involved in shady shit. but she converses and does what she’s asked of from hades. 

owns a motorcycle! doesn’t actually know how to drive a car, just her bike. takes care of it like it’s her baby. doesn’t let anyone else touch it, fix it up or handle it whatsoever. Hypos tried to hop on once and he ran every time he saw her for at least 3 months after that.

her and zag don’t exactly have a ‘name’ to their relationship. it’s somewhat on and off, between dating and friendship sometimes. Than is someone very close to her; the only person she can be seen outside of a work setting talking to. dusa is working up to that, though, as she’s been getting closer with her. 

[neopuff]

riverdale ep 1-3

these twins always make me >___>

oh yeah i knew jason was gonna die

this is very artsy

i thought he was murdered

oh

tragedy

oh......a mom for veronica

what is a...chocolate shoppe? and why? does it sell? burgers?

is veronica the new kid

OH KEVIN

the gay kid gweiopubgoewgnew

the acting in this is terrible

the archie actor is clearly not a real ginger so i approve of this casting lmao

“to pass time i started composing poems in my head” shut up archie

archie: says anything betty: amazing!

lmao

betty: ive been thinking about us- archie: is that a hot bitch i see

“we do, both of us, together”

omg

GNOIWPEGWE BETTY’S FACE IS KILLING ME

awkward

oh....archies dad

thats not archies dad

archies dad got that fat gut

“im a sophomore’ BITCH NO UR NOT

SHES GOTTA BE LIKE 25 LMAAAOO whaaatt

im still dying theyre supposed to be 15 gwenpiubgewo;gwe

“gay, thank god, lets be best friends” im gonna piss and die

wow

love these pussycats

“ive had every flavor of boy except orange” its better that

waywiongubwepogn;wegew

ARCHIE AND GRUNDY IM DYING!!!!

IM GONNA FUCKINGGG DIIEEEE

GRUNDYINOGEW;EWL

im pissing im

DYING

shes the music teacher

why wouldnt they just make up a new teacherniogwepng;ew WHY IS SHE MS GRUNDY!!!

oh

archies dad/veronicas mom have a....history

“chose the rich kid”

wow

so many divorced parents

outdoor cafeteria

when will i see a high school that has one of these forreal

i assume its a west coast or south us thing

kevin: refers to cheryl as a widow me: i called the JOKES

“is cheerleading still a thing?” “is being the gay best friend still a thing”

the dialogue in this show is terrible its so funny

im glad betty/ronnie is a good ship

grundy is all turned on by archies music

this is so gross and im DYING

“i dont think thats a good idea” cuz u fucked a 15 year old bitch

oh

theyre not talking about the fucking

did cheryl murder her brother

why doesnt just one of them say it and not mention the other

bitch ur the only one who’d get in trouble ur an ADULT

that was so lackluster

wow

GNIWEUPGEW;OGWE

CHERYL’S FACEGNIEW;GEW

like yeah....not the kind of heat i meant :\

oh

im glad cheryls the villain i always hated her

wow

veronica: i know who u are [has known her for 2 minutes]

this dialogue is so unnatural and bad its cracking me tf up

get WRECKED cheryl

veronica: betty and i come as a matching set

i bet u do

time for football

“what you got something better to do” dont be rude

awww

“why did you defend me” just accept the kindness u fool

man

i like mr lodge

this is very awkward

was polly a character in the comics i dont remember her

WOW

“both of us” gewinouogbewgew

im DYING

in the headspace

“archiekins” gweinouobgweo;ngew

wow

“cheryl blossoms cheerleading squad.......”

bettys mom is so annoying

she sounds familiar

oh

mr lodge just sent a lotta money their way

why did the coach call his dad

he said hed give him a day

impatient ass

archies dad is just like :\

:/

:\

:/

these actors dont look related at all

which is funny to me

oh good its the pill in ibiza song

omg

i love that veronica is the speech giver in this show

moose/kevin gwiuebogiwgew

where is REGGIE

my SON

wow

openly talking about the illegal secrets at a big party

i just realized reggie is the asian guy

i didnt hear his name and couldnt figure out who tf that was gweopiubgwe;ngwe

im a fool

whered ronnie go

dancing with the gay guy, god

“i have this fantasy of us as a power couple” who asks someone out like that

STOP STARING AT GRUNDY

this is super awkward

cheryl is gonna murder...everyone

they could just

chill

“cheryl blossom truly is...the antichrist” just all her a bitch like a normal person

“we’re not just friends we’re best friends” shut up archie

wOW

hes NEVER FELT for betty

if these two make out i s2g

once they kiss cheryls gonna open the door

foolish children

ronnie dont DO IT

foolish

sighs

boring

what how tf would she know they made out

did they not come out at exactly 7 minutes

ok but wheres betty

oh hey jughead

i like jugheads not-crown

oh

now shes goin straight for love

“of course i love you” hes being so...obtuse

annoying

oh

ok now its about not being good enough

sure

did they find jayjay

and look at that

he got shot in the head

probably by his sister

ok

its obvious cheryl did it

im sure theyll switch it up like somehow it was secretly jughead

but it was cheryl

ok ep 2

fgewgw

why were they even fuckin at 6 am

cant believe they made moose gay

i forgot his gf’s name in the comicsniguwebgew

god

the actor that played jason was so uggo

GEWNIOG;EW SHARING A SHAKE WITH HIS TWIN SISTER!!!

maybe someone shot him for being so openly incestuous with his creepy sister

i know its like plagueing archie now but i feel like this should help him

“are you up?” “no” “youre killing your mother”

he went to grundys house

weird

and hes shirtless

“you could be expelled” “we could go to jail” NEITHER OF THOSE THINGS WOULD HAPPEN TO HIM!!!

pedophilia is not a two way street

oh

bettys mom is...the worst

betty plz dont talk to your bitch mother about your life

i love archies eyebrows

i hope this is the end of archie/betty forever

wow

“sardonic humor”

oh

bye jughead

oh

is kevin not out to his dad

“the yellows for friendship” sure

veronica is so aggressively into this friendship

YAYYY

the otp stays together

wow

betty u are a fool

that is your future WIFE

oh

hi mr weatherbee

cheryl is wearing a spider pin gewoinubgewlngkew

CHERYL

archie and mr weatherbee just gonna

make eyes

jughead: archie you KILLED him

fewijohuog

HE THINKS ARCHIE DID IT

no jughead i was just fucking the hot prof

jughead: ew

fewiougobewgno;ewlgew

kevin moose is your new bf

“fate throws us together” ok

wow

why is he rejecting moose

because hes in the closet???

hes clearly trying to come out cmon

oh

everyones terrified of cheryl now so thats good

oh

bettys mom

“i ship it” why

“moose has an official girlfriend...mitch” i feel like i heard this line wrong

oh, betty

dont cry sweetums

“im supposed to say yes” THE DIALOGUE

ronnie is trying so hard with these dramatic white ppl

really

they couldnt even keep weatherbee fat

is this channel afraid of fat ppl

wow

does this bitch just sit in her empty ass music room all day

is she not really even a teacher

DONT TALK ABOUT FEELINGS

YALL ARE GROSS!!!!

disgusting

bitch get a dog and leave teenagers alone

WOW

WOW LMAAAAOOOOOOOO

AAAAAAA

JUGHEAD: WHAT!! GROSS!!! WTF!!!

this is not high school cheerleading

one of the girls here actually looks like a high schooler

cheryl just called herself exoticgewiongewiogew; CUZ YOURE A GINGER? BITCH

i die

oh

betty why

wOW

betty dont do this

cheryls a crazy ho

i know theyll make up by the end of the ep but still

“like we were meant to be best friends” gweniguebwg

2nd grade tutor

gewinogubwegw

“oh, little archie-” little archiewgn;klew I DIE

references are what i live for

i cant believe betty let cheryl into her house

wheres her mom to scream and chase her out

welp

there goes that

betty dont let her into ur HOME

oh

whats betty doing

“BEFORE I KILL YOU” BETTY

terrible thing to say

are they not friends because archie stood him up

cougarngiewgew

SHES A PEDOPHILE

awkward

i guess bettys mom coulda killed jason

“sometimes a friend is better than a boyfriend” actually, always, not sometimes

oh reggies finally doin something

gonna keep up the reggie/jughead rivalry

FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT

ok

“you wanna d the right thing” the way archie said that made it sound like he wants to fuck her and she doesnt want to

but whatever

so does jughead and bettys friendship not exist in this universe

nod like douches and mutually suppress our emotions

wow

this dialogue is still awful its so funny

i hope it never improves purely for my amusement

out door pep rally...

[dances]

fewiulgbew

AHH HONEY HONEY

YOU ARE MY

CAAAANDY GIIIIIIRL

good shit

oh

cheryls having a Time

god the kid that plays jason is so uggo

oh

bye cheryl

finally getting a genuine emotional response from her

were they gonna fake his death for attention but then he was actually dead

yayyy

make up

veronica is over here like “betty and i were destined to be friends” and betty is like “im sure we wont know each other in a week”

aww archie and jughead back 2gedda

does jughead know betty or not

wheres the jughead/betty brotp of my past

veronica and jughead: interact me: yes...

im glad that, unlike in the comics, archie is not dating both girls at once and then also every other girl he meets

where ya goin weatherbee

wha

A CHALKBOARD LOL

i doubt a school like this would have a chalkboard instead of a smartboard

oh

did she do it

gasp

im sticking with my fake death for the attention theory

OK LAST EP

im enjoying this show

but i dont think i could take multiple Dramatic Teen Shows

how could cheryl be wearing that skirt in public school

“the plan was bananas”

oh

jason just wanted.....to leave

thats fine

oh

who got shot

gwneio;glkwe

in my neighborhood it wouldve just been the hunters

is archie gonna have a shiner for the rest of the show

oh

is betty not poor as shit in this universe?

i shouldve guessed from her moms outfits

“a lois lane type like you” nice and ronnie can be clark kent

omg leave grundy alone so she can die in hell

wha

why didnt you just say that you were alone

oh

dog

ok

a date....

oh

hes hot

good call, ronnie

CHUCK CLAYTON

“hes kind of a player” dont be racist, betty

he is hot as hell tho

awww “juggie”

finally jughead and betty are 2gedda

jughead you need shit for your college applications

oh right, dilton

what

“im not ten years old” but you are 15 which is not very different

so if chuck is in the show is nancy gonna be around too

ronnie/chuck is a good ship

“to OUR relationship” shut the fuck you youre a pedophile

wow

the sticky maple....

wow

chuck was cute

ronnie is gonna tear him apart

man

why does chuck have to be a dick!!! chuck was always a nice guy

fewionpgnew

betty: [COVERS FACE]

destroy him

PUNCH HIM

why is chuck a villain im bothered but also hes the worst destroy him

this terrible au version of chuck is terrible

“nothing is off the table...except for my body” weiugblewnkg

i love the pussycats

is this every other girl chuck did this to

oh

its ethel

hi cheryl

go away

lmao

whose this kid

wow

ok jughead

dont steal his ice cream

oh

dilton shot a gun gwoinegbpweo;nglwe

survivalist?!?! DILTON

IM DYING

HES A TECHNOLOGY OBSESSED NERD

why do the pussycats roll their eyes at josie

“a bnd with b&v”

did they find...ze book

so the football players dont even fuck the girls its just about getting a date and a selfie???

oh

cheryl, doubting her brother

what

just take the book

why not...just take the book

powerful

bettys rly lucky her mom isnt violent

(for now)

oh

she looks super awkward in that

omg

the sound of bettys lil demons in her head

“and a hot tub....”

this is such an awkward conversation

just imagining this with real 15 year olds is ridiculous

oh hey ronnie

chuck youre so fucking stupid

shes wearing a swimsuit and heels this is CLEARLY A TRAP

GWENOIGO;NEW

BETTY

black is not a good hair color

ronnie: im so turned on

GEWNIOG;EWG

SLAP!!!!

i just realized why archies dad is so familiar

he was on generator rex AND clone high

love it

part of me always liked archie/josie

15 is not late wtf

“slut shaming...its what they call it when sluts get shamed” wow

when does bettys mom get murdered

um

are they gonna burn him

UM

um

betty

LMAO

shes fine shes just pissed

awww

dads gonna support u now

must be NICE

gweoniugbweo;gew bettys face when ronnie said she called chuck “jason” was so funny

are they gonna do some she went off her meDS OO---OOOHHHA AAAHHH TERRIBLE BEAST

#burn it

cheryl tryin to make up for ze past

i still hate her idc

omg when does grundy get murdered too im done with this pedophilia subplot

STAY AWAY

FROM THE CHILD!!!

-___-

dilton you fool

im happy juggie and betty are hanging out

oh

dont mention ms grundys car

NO

YOU

FOOL!!!!

im tired of this pedophile plz shoot her next

ok im all caught up

whens the next episode