#because of the way that di feisheng grows subtly but significantly over the course of the show
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(...but what if I was?)
Li Lianhua / Li Xiangyi | Mysterious Lotus Casebook (2023)
#mysterious lotus casebook#li lianhua#li xiangyi#lhl#my mlc gifs#thanks to the folks who helped weigh in on that last gif!#specifically thank you to:#the-surreptitious-albatross#lianxiaojie#and an apology...#to our dear a-fei#for including him in this gifset#I still believe that the feihua relationship is one of the most devastating tragedies of this show#because of the way that di feisheng grows subtly but significantly over the course of the show#and he comes SO CLOSE to loving and accepting llh/lxy for who he is and who he always was#and maybe he in fact DOES get to this point internally#but his last words to llh are inviting him to fight him like times of old#showing (in llh's eyes at least) a regression to their previous selves#a “self” that maybe llh feels he never actually was#which is why I specifically wanted a feihua scene in that last gif to juxtapose with the more obvious shan gudao scene#the subtext of that feihua scene is very sexy of them (I am looking disrespectfully)#but the text of the scene is brutal and tragic:#as di feisheng violently lashes out at li lianua for his perceived weaknesses#and while llh's initial reaction was at most faintly irritated up until that point#you can see that spark of genuine hurt and sadness in his gaze as dfs holds him at arms length#anyway this has been “things about mlc that make me want to tear my hair out at 3AM”#thank you for coming to my ted talk
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