#because making a Robin only club excludes Cass for no reason and that just feels kinda mean to me

[danny-chase]

Unasked for Batfam Headcanons

Because I have no impulse control.

The dead robin club ended because people kept joining. At first it was Jason and Steph's inside joke and then Damian and Dick died and it took the fun out of it. Also they always felt bad for excluding Cass (as she wasn't a Robin but Shiva has canonically killed her twice) because Cass is a part of the family dammit.

For this reason, groups that formed after the dead robins club also fall a bit flat. Dick once made a joke about him and Bruce being in amnesia club and everyone proceeded to collectively lose their minds because no one wanted to be next.

Now they just hang out and call it a girl's night (literally even when it's just the boys). It started as actual girl's nights led by Barbara that various boys would crash and then they just kept the name when hanging out with literally any family member(s).

Tim: oh sorry Steph, I'm hanging out with Jason and Dick for a girl's night.

Steph: that's okay, I'll be content to have Cass and Damian for our girl's night then.

Girl's eventually becomes code for, we're going to sit in the bathroom and have mental breakdowns together.

Bruce does not understand girl's night reference, but he has painted both Cass's and Steph's nails while ranting about the JLA sooooo

Dick and Tim organize a family bonding camping trip to mirror team bonding they did with the teen titans and young justice

It goes suprisingly well and becomes a yearly family tradition

Alfred gets the weekend for vacation because Bruce is a competent adult when he's in the wilderness - he can cook anywhere but an actual kitchen

Mostly because he takes directions extremely literally (not even going to lie, this is something I did), for example the first time he was asked to microwave a can of soup, he didn't take the soup out of the can. And of course if you nearly blow up the microwave once, no one lets you near it again.

Who ever taught Bruce how to forage for food in the wildlife just showed him how it was done and pointed out the specific visual cues.

Meanwhile an 8 year old Dick just asked him to microwave a can of soup. And Bruce did what he was told.

In other news, they learned after the first year that no one is sharing a tent with anyone.

Sleeping with your siblings is fun and games until someone has a nightmare (which is unfortunately common in the family).

They also learned Duke can make campfires look absolutely wild through manipulating the light.

They literally just stared at a fire for 3 hrs while he messed around.

Duke was then invited to the titans and young justices campouts because Dick and Tim were like omg Wally and Bart need this in their lives.

This does in fact spiral out of control, and random heroes that Duke has never met know him as the fire kid.

Oh and not like earth heroes - they know who Duke is. I'm talking like light years away some random alien hero found out through the grape vine that Starfire's ex-boyfriends adopted but not adopted yet brother can do crazy shit with a bag of twigs and a lighter.

Other club names that got shut down: killed then revived by the same person club, evil family lineage club, mind controlled club, tortured by loa club, Lazarus pit club (fun facts would currently have Jason, Cass, and Kate if you go with everything's canon), killed a person who was later resuscitated club, turned into a tentacle monster club, and many many more cor the short period of time they tried to figure out which traumas they shared with certain members (it was actually very short because no one was willing to share anything about themselves that wasn't common knowledge).