#because im INVESTED now even if this fic doesnt really have anything i super enjoy I Need To See How It Ends

[shitsncraps]

reading a fic where they just. did not write spy. they wrote scout and slapped the spy label on it. i wouldnt mind it if they marked him as an oc but like. it is just. scout personality in spy body. i dont know how to digest it. i have mental indigestion because of that fic. help.

[obsequence]

hi so this is for if you care about my writing ! my new blog is @suturism and im gonna be posting updates about my wips on there alongside my other mainblog shit :) i also have a twitter by the same username but i really just tweet abt random shit on there lol , but feel free to follow me if u want !!

im about to ramble a bit so if tail lights is your concern that's below here

obviously , i barely wrote last year , especially compared to the year before that . i didnt really make an effort in my writing at all after about march or so . and it wasn't lack or motivation or ideas

for a lot of people , it's really easy to write TO cope with like difficult situations but for me that's just . not it . im a very tunnel-visioned person and i can really only focus on one goal at once , and my goal for 2023 was literally like: survive . because of life situations plus my own health . i also didnt know whether id have to get extended care , so i didnt want to start any like big fics or anything during that time because i didnt know if id be able to update . thats the primary reason i didnt write much

the second is literally just insecurity and posting anxiety which sounds stupid LOL but it's super real for me . im really trying not to be so self conscious about what i post and to be content with the fact that i have progress to make , but it's hard at times . esp because (imo) tail lights was lackluster and i REALLY want my next multichapter to be better and something i can be proud of . so up to this point ive kinda been too anxious to post much if im being honest ! but i can feel that ebbing and it's simultaneously exciting and scary !

the third reason is just that like up til recently i didnt see a point !! my perspective towards writing has been really negative for a while but now im like rediscovering my love for it in my own and others' works and im just so . it makes me gush and also ANGRY because i feel stupid for neglecting it for this long LOL

so yeah with that: tail lights haha . im sorry but this the official funeral :| better now than holding out hope .

its status is basically: i have no PLANS to finish part two and i dont WANT to finish part two , so dont anticipate anything . not saying it wont ever happen if one day my feelings change but like i really dont see that happening so

i just have too many ick feelings associated to continue it and also enjoy it , so i really am sorry about that

BUT just because i am less invested in tail lights doesnt mean it isnt important to me still !! i appreciate everyone who read it/kudosed/commented/holds it dear 🖤 more than you can ever know . writing that showed me that people WILL actually read what i write , and that they care about it too , and thats a priceless sentiment i cherish

and with THAT: new writing !

so i dont wanna say anything super concrete but what im posting next is PROBABLY going to be yellowjackets related , but it may be saltburn or even tlou !! ill probably write a fic or two related to tlou after the remastered comes out depending on how much content we get and if its anything i can work with :)

but yeah if u read this far thank u for caring about my writing i love you