#because i'm not fully committed to any of these musings
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do you think how Jamie reacted to Roy and Keeley's teasing at the auction in 1x04 was related to his trauma from his Dad making him loose his virginity to a lady from the red light district? and do you think after the three of them officially get together, that they ever talk about that?
Tricky one, nonny, because as much as I tend towards Watsonian explanations over Doylist ones, in this particular case I can’t quite disregard the fact that I am not at all convinced that Jamie’s Amsterdam backstory was in place when 1x04 was written. It might have been, sure, but… yeah, I doubt it, actually.
And, like, in hindsight, after 3x06, it’s hard not to connect Jamie’s discomfort at the gala with his experiences in Amsterdam. Even if he doesn’t consciously join the dots himself, even if he’s not yet realized that the experience was traumatic to him (and I think 3x06 does suggest that it was, even if it’s possibly to argue otherwise), the notion of having to have sex with someone he doesn’t want to have sex with, especially when they’re that much older (not because having sex with old people is gross, obviously, but because it would mirror the experience he had as a child), would have made him deeply uneasy.
I mean, it would make most of us deeply uneasy, so that’s not the strange part. The strange part, really, is that Jamie believes – if only for a little while – Roy and Keeley’s assertion that he’ll need to put out. Becaue, yes, Jamie’s not always the brightest, but of course the club’s not actually pimping out the players. He knows that, surely. But for a moment he isn’t sure – and maybe that’s because it’s already happened to him, hasn’t it? Not quite like this, no, but money exchanged and him required to fuck someone he had not chosen to fuck. So, yes, things like that can happen and maybe they do happen at Richmond because Jamie didn’t see it coming the first time either, did he, but no, it’s just a fucking joke, Roy and Keeley having a laught and he looks like a right idiot now, doesn’t he, for having believed them, and he can’t even articulate (not even to himself, I think) why he thought, for a moment, that maybe…
Yeah. Makes a horrible sort of sense, doesn’t it?
So, in hindsight I think we can read his reaction being at least partially related to what was done to him in Amsterdam, and normally I’d be perfectly happy with that, actual text over authorial intent, but in this case I can’t stop wondering about what it all was originally intended to mean (if, indeed, the Amsterdam part was not known to the writers at the time of writing 1x04). Maybe it intrigues me because it has the potential to reveal more and interesting things about Jamie? I don’t know, and I don’t have any real theories either, just… something about football players being used to getting sold and traded, something about his sense of self and value directly tied to his body and what he can do with it, time spent creating his brand and the slight disassociation and/or confusion between self and image it can cause (even as I think that Jamie has a very strong sense of self generally). Given all of that, is it so outlandish for him to briefly assume that maybe this too might be required? Especially given his experiences in Amsterdam… Can be a mix of the two, really. Maybe that’s the interpreation I mostly favour.
As for if they ever talk about it... I don’t necessarily think it’s something Jamie would bring up and I doubt Roy immediately connects the dots once he hears Jamie’s tale of his first Amsterdam trip. Keeley, I think, doesn’t know what happened in the Red Light District; to me, Jamie telling Roy reads very much like a ‘first time I ever told anyone’ thing, but that’s obviously open to interpretation.
But say something reminds Roy of that gala dinner, and what was said then. Maybe they’re getting ready to attend it once more and this time they’re dead pleased to be seated at the same table, making little jokes about can you fucking imagine if someone would have told us then that this is where we’d end up and could have saved ourselves so much trouble if we’d just gone home together that night and Keeley playfully reminds Jamie that he doesn’t actually have to sleep with someone if he doesn’t want to and Jamie pouts like that shit wasn’t funny but he’s laughing too because it was long ago and they’re here now and he doesn’t tend to dwell –
– but Roy goes quiet because wait hang on oh no fuck no, and he doesn’t say anything right away, they need to get going and he’s not sure is he, and he keeps on saying nothing throughout the dinner, and behind the still face he is quietly spiralling as he watches Jamie’s every move like a hawk, every twitch of his lips and every roll of his eyes.
Jamie and Keeley both notice, and are both confused. They keep exchanging glances and when Nate’s off to the loo and Jade’s done her disappeaering act and Sam and Dani drag Jamie off to join the rest of the team for a round of shots, Keeley takes the opportunity to lean in and ask what’s going on, Roy, are you okay?
He’ll tell her then, I think, and that’s not great – not his story to share – but it’s eating at him and there’s no one else for him to confide in and Keeley is part of it too, so yes. He tells her; she’s upset but still the voice of reason; no matter what happened that night Jamie’s doing fine right now, he’s having a great time with his friends and we shouldn’t ruin that for him, but come tomorrow we’ll have a proper chat all three of us, okay, sort things out?
And come tomorrow, they do.
#had more thoughts on this than i expected to#hope they make some sort of sense to you nonny - thank you for the ask!#i'd love to hear other people's thoughts on this#because i'm not fully committed to any of these musings#like i have thoughts - apparently - but i'm very prepared to change my mind if presented with compelling arguments as to why i should#1x04#3x06#jamie tartt#roy kent#keeley jones#royjamiekeeley#roy x jamie x keeley#asks
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Flirting Sentences, Vol. 3
(Sentences for flirting muses, with varying levels of brashness. Adjust phrasing where needed)
"Can I walk you home?"
"Brooding. Good look. Do you practice in the mirror?"
"I think we're supposed to kiss now..."
"If you're trying to impress me, it's working!"
"Why don't you ask me on a proper date?"
"I used to try to get you to look at my legs."
"You know, if you ask a girl out for coffee, you should have something to say."
"You know, I used to have a huge crush on you."
"Have dinner with me? Just the two of us?"
"You're in over your head. You're not fully committed to this task, and because of that, you will fail."
"You have beautiful eyes."
"I'm into you because you're hot. And smart. In that order, but both are needed."
"There's this Italian restaurant I managed to book a table at, if you're still keen on going on a proper date."
"Do you have any idea how much I missed watching you get dressed in the morning?"
"This is the wrong time to be strong and silent and so... Attractive."
"You want to kiss me, don't you?"
"Do you know what I'd like? Really like?"
"Kiss me like you hate me."
"I knew you didn't stay in town for the lovely weather."
"You are the most perfect and beautiful thing I've ever seen."
"You just can't stay away, can you?"
"I love your lipstick."
"Suits you, flustered. It's a good look."
"You look very beautiful tonight. Has anyone ever told you that?"
"Say, why don't we carry on this delightful conversation over a cocktail?"
"Well, I must say, you are anything but dull!"
"I was just wondering if, um- If you might like to come out for a drink with me sometime?"
"I must say, you're much prettier than your predecessor."
"May I have this dance?"
"Well, that is an interesting way to say hello!"
"I've seen your picture in the newspaper. You're way hotter in person."
"Oh, and here I thought you were getting all kinky with me!"
"Are you like this with all your women?"
"Are you saying you want to date me?"
"Has anyone ever told you that you have lovely hands?"
"What are you going to do? Spank me?"
"So, have you got a boyfriend, or...?"
"Are you growing a beard? I've always had rather a soft spot for bearded men."
#rp meme#rp memes#roleplay meme#roleplay memes#rp prompts#roleplay prompts#sentence starters#assorted;#flirting;#romance;
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(continuation of this piece. part ii of regency au with jing yuan)
"he needs to stop doing this."
you tell lord luocha this as you stumble out of your one room cottage, desperately attempting to smooth down your day gown. your palms shake as you do and you shoot your patron an angry look.
lord luocha looks perfectly passive, painfully neutral with a hint of mirth. the bastard. "i think it's quite appropriate for the general to call upon you this hour of the day. i thought you would be prepared."
"i am not an 'eligible lady' as i am so often reminded," you shake your head. "i cannot constantly be ready to take his company, just because it's before supper. be reasonable, my lord. speak with him about this."
"perhaps," luocha tilts his head with the barest hint of a smile. "i'll consider it. for now, why don't you go greet our guest? i'll have some refreshments sent in."
"fine." you say. your voice wavers.
this is not the first time the retired general, Jing Yuan, has called upon you. it's more like the fifth. maybe sixth. it is more frightening to keep count of his increasingly frequently visits (as they clearly indicate some type of explicit interest), so you stopped counting them recently. peace of mind and all.
you enter the drawing with and bow to the general without thinking, "good afternoon, general."
"likewise," he says easily, voice so deep and rich; it makes your insides feel wobbly.
jing yuan sits on one of the loveseats, legs tastefully spread and in some amount of regalia. well-dressed, certainly. his hair is half-tied up as he so favors, and his face has a healthy amount of blush. a crisp jaw. bulging forearms and thighs beneath his various dressings. a broad chest. it is hard not to ogle him overtly. you train your gaze on the hand-tufted rug before rising and daintily (as you can) sit across from him on the other side of the loveseat. you tuck your legs to the side, barely remembering to not fully fold them under yourself. decorum and all.
(it feels foolish. jing yuan hardly seem to care. lord luocha thinks your bumbling is amusing.)
"i apologize for the intrusion," he says. he squeezes his hands into loose fists. you don't miss the action. "will you indulge me for a time?"
"i'm already here, aren't i?" you quip back, tone light. easy. "i don't mind the company."
there's more you could say—
("general, i think you are so very kind and thoughtful. thank you for spending your spare time with me.")
("general, i am sorry i can't attend any of the balls and festivities as anything more than a performer. i would not mind being on your arm, if circumstances were different, and you desired it so".)
("general, how much longer will you entertain this? are you intending to steal my heart, only to break it?"
instead, you remain quiet, picking at your nailbeds. jing yuan watches you with a hum. flexes his hands.
"are you working on any new pieces?" he asks.
"a few, actually." you reply. "the muses have been kind to me."
"oh?" he smiles. he tilts his head cutely, almost boyish, despite his age. "may i ask the subject matter?"
"ah—" you feel your face heat. "a number of things. subject matters. a varying themes."
truthfully, you have started four new paintings in the last week. all of which were started in moments of such deep inspirations, they had you painting and laying base colors from sunrise until sunset. it just so happens that these... works have. a clear theme. that of the general.
(during his second visit, he commented on the blooming azaleas. you've been obsessed with perfecting the shape of their petals. his third visit, you sat on the same seat as him. you were so much closer then, and found yourself lost in the honey color of his eyes. the punch of purple underneath them, an accumulation of sleepless nights. another is of a lion, like that of his crest. the final is a portrait of him that has you committing every bit of him to memory. perhaps you'll be able to capture his likeness with your memory if the muses continue to favor you.)
"you're quite the varied artist." he leans his jaw on his fist. "your dedication to your craft is most admirable."
"i cannot help the ways in which inspiration forces me to act," or, to thirst over the man in front of you. god forbid a parched man be given drink so fine. you shake your head. "i have had... some amount of increased, enjoyable, new interactions over the past while. i suppose i'm feeling invigored."
"oh?" jing yuan looks smitten. his eyes go half-lidded. "may i guess the source of your inspiration?"
"if you do, you'll only embarrass me."
"so, you think i will be right in my guess then?"
"i know so." you roll your eyes, sheepish. "i am not foolish enough to think i could hide face and play games with the Divine Foresight and win."
"you underestimate yourself."
"hardly. have you... met yourself, general?"
"often, frequently." he nods to himself. he catches your gaze. it's piercing. "i find myself in the mirror, often, these days. i tell myself that i am spry enough and have retained enough charm through my years to properly court and woo the recluse, genius artist i have been stealing time from. i meet the man in my mirror and think that he is quite clever, but tends to underestimate you as well."
your breath is caught in your chest. you scrunch the skirt of your dress up in your palms and swallow.
"the general speaks freely and foolishly."
"and yet, i do not lie."
"... you are brazen."
"do you not require such treatment?" jing yuan laughs sweetly. "if i were any more gentle with you, you would've already retreated far into your lord's gardens. i wouldn't hope to see you again. you will need to forgive me for my shamelessness."
"... i could perhaps be convinced." you scoot closer on the love seat. you should. create space away from him. before you do something stupid and unbecoming. but you find yourself drawn closer. "the general is a kind man. good-hearted."
"such a charitable assessment."
"i know it to be true." you do know. the man keeps his own gardens, tends them himself. he pays his servants good wages and left war and bloodshed behind sometime ago. "i would like to get to know his good heart more."
jing yuan steels himself then. you watch it happen. his spine straightens, his throat bobs. sweat beads at his temples, you now notice. his keeps his hands in his lap, wringing them together.
"then we are in agreement?"
"... only if the general treats me well." you stumble over your words. "only if you treat me well, general."
"jing yuan, please."
"fine. jing yuan, then." it takes everything in you not to reach for his hands. your last threads of civility barely remaining. "will you treat me well, jing yuan?"
he breathes. you feel the warm exhale of it fan over your cheeks. your gaze drops to the softness of his bottom lip.
"only the best, for you."
"so, you're smitten with me?"
"simply struck." he gulps. you need him, you decide, decorum be damned. you lean forward, just as he does. you can hear the tremor of your breath in time with his—
the door the drawing room opens, suddenly, with a resounding thud. you jump away from the general, a hand over your heart. you attempt to not noticeably pant, though you perhaps fail. lord luocha raises a knowing eyebrow as a few of his staff bring in a platter of a small treats and bubbly drinks in fluted glasses.
"forgive the intrusion," luocha places a hand on jing yuan's shoulder. the general straightens up. "i figured that you two must be in need some of refreshments. may i suggest a walk in the garden, later? perhaps, you could show him your herb patches, [name]."
lord luocha shoots you a knowing look.
(said patch of herbs is just outside of your cottage. a good distance away from the main estate.)
"i'd love to." you swallow and shake your head. "if the general will deign to spend a bit more time with me."
jing yuan looks at you, really looks at you, and smiles. it is an honest, genuine thing. you are glad luocha is at his back, so only you can see the earnest of it. it is something special, you think, just for you.
"as much as you will allow me."
and you will give him as much as you can muster.
#lore writes#drabbles#jing yuan x reader#jing yuan x you#hsr x reader#i told y'all he haunts me#you're both so smitten with each other so beloved so DEAAAR#jy regency au
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something i wanna talk about bc it's been on my mind for a while (largely due to the plotting & discussion that's been going on recently & the meta i wrote on the subject) - poly ships
now i will always encourage people to explore poly ships (poly > shitty love triangles always) if that's something they think their muse(s) would be seeking, but i want to stress that poly relationships are not for everyone, and that's okay
i have two poly muses on my roster (so far), both with very healthy outlooks - and by that i mean, they are 100% comfortable with that dynamic. there's no insecurity, no jealousy, no negative feelings at all towards the idea of them or their partner(s) being involved with other people, and that's how it should be. if you want to explore a poly dynamic with your muse, and you find that said muse feels insecure or jealous at the prospect of their partner/s also being involved with someone else... then that muse is probably not suited to that dynamic.
for example, with my two poly muses: i have b.eisht, who has fully committed herself to o.sial for eternity, will always and forever return to him, but they both seek other partners (and though it hasn't happened yet, i'm sure they'd be happy to share the same one too) and actively encourage each other to do so. there isn't an ounce of jealousy in b.eisht's bones (though she will be a menace to his partners because it's fun). and then there is y.ingxing, who gives a maximum total of 0 fucks about who his partners are involved with (if anyone) as long as they still hold his hand too.
now i'm not saying there can't be tension at any point - all relationships have tension. it's realistic, it's normal. relationships aren't always soft and fluffy and perfect every single second of every single day. partners argue, they clash, they fight. they have differing opinions. they make mistakes. and i'm sure that in poly dynamics that still applies, because that's normal. but if it becomes a case of your muse wanting multiple partners, but doesn't want those partners to get involved (either with each other, or with someone outside that relationship) because of how it makes them feel, then that's putting forward a double standard that is unfair and unhealthy, particularly if they are the one initiating that dynamic in the first place, and that can get very uncomfortable for all involved.
there is nothing wrong with holding up a hand and saying: actually, this isn't working for my muse after all, can we discuss this and/or put a stop to it and come up with something else. poly is great in theory but, as i said, isn't for everyone. for example, my y.ingxing is absolutely comfortable in a polycule, but blade is not. i would never force blade into a dynamic that i know he wouldn't be comfortable in, because it's not fair for all sides.
i just. i just want people to write healthy poly ships and not fall into the temptation of drama, bc poly ships (and people) already get judged harshly and unfairly and the rpc doesn't need to add to that
#;forever yelling into the abyss (ooc)#( and bear in mind i say all of this as an aroace person )#( i don't claim to be an expert on the subject )#( but i am so so tired of seeing ships involving multiple characters fall into the same traps )#( it is not for everyone and you shouldn't force it )
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Hi hi hi ok ok so like, ive been obsessed eoth Phoebe Bridgers recently while writing my own song and stuff since i get to write a report on like a bunch of different artists for college and im including her in it.
But what i cane to say is that Billy and muse FULLY remind me of Moon Song.
More specifically the lines
"You couldn't have. You Couldn't have. Stuck your tongue down the throat of somebody. Who loves you more. So i'll wait for the next time you want me. Like a dog with a bird in its mouth"
Like i dont know of it makes sense?? But like it just reminds me of them because of the fact that like this part of the song is practically talking about the denial of the idea of someone wanting another. Like, the relationship is unsteady and theres always that chance that someone else will come along (in this case other groupies) who would take away that attention or love or what ever it is. And then the dog analogy too?? Because the verse ends with a 'mm' to replicate the sound of a dogs whimper and begging to just get loved by another. Like the dog is a sign of trying to stay loyal, trying to stay devoted even going as far as bringing back a token to win what was had before back into their life (the bird).
AND AND THEN THERES THE LINES OF
"But now I am dreaming. And your singing at my birthday. And ive never seen you smile so big"
Like she's litterally trying to imagine things where better than they are. But in relation to Billy and muse, i fully interpret this line as muse's naivety at the very VERY beginning of it all and before that cycle starts back up. Like she's imagining things will be okay, things will work out and that it was 'just this once' or something like that.
But then theres also the line:
"But you're holding me like water in your hands"
Basically aluding to the fact that every time Bully has betrayed muses trust, it causes that break to happen and for her to fall apart all over again, just like water would when someone tries to hold it, it falls through the cracks and pours out of the palms.
Im probably like thinking wayyy too much into this but like I just wanted to share my thoughts haha. Also love your writing, like i cant express how many nights ive soent just re reading and re reading because my god it is so good. Anyways bye byeee
YES THIS IS SO REAL (again I'm humbly asking for forgiveness for taking so long 🥺)
muse knows very quickly that there will always be other girls, groupies, that he'll use to make him feel like he's not tied down, that he hasn't shared his feelings with someone, his love. and she's desperate for him not too, to put it behind her when he shows any morsel of wanting him. and whenever things have been good and she can slowly see him falling into old habits after saying something he feels is to revealing, too commiting, she's desperate for him not too. she gets clingier, tries to praise him more, offer him more sexual favors, anything to try and stop him. but one, her trying so hard shows she cares which reminds billy why he loves her and he doesn't want to think about that, two she's not letting him detach easily which makes it an annoyance, and three it's easier to snap than to admit wrongdoing. muse really does remind me of a puppy dog, coming around with big puppy dog eyes, snuggling up begging to be pet, whimpering for attention, any bone thrown she'll fetch and bring back.
muse totally convinces herself the first few times that it was just once, well a couple missteps, but it'll be alright. there's a whole future of good things, right? and he feeds enough into the illusion that the picture is almost complete before he starts to tear the photo up.
yes, yes, yes, eventually the water will slip through every crack possible, leaving only droplets also searching for escape, it might not happen quickly, but he provides the cracks and even if she's desperate to stay, each meltdown brings her closer to emptying his hands.
i love it when y'all think into it, it's so beautiful to have a community to overanalyze things with the silly little characters I've created in these universes, and I love it 💋 thank you so much for sharing, and that's literally the highest compliment. stuff like that keeps me writing because I'm so glad you can find enjoyment in it and re read and re read, I'm glad to share my thoughts and for them not to just be mine. bye!! ❤️
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After years and years in the roleplay community, I'll be frank: My female muses are not just here for shipping, anymore than my male muses are. Several of the muses I write here, I will not, in fact, ship at all. [ On that topic: Raphael is one who is completely exclusive to my friend on discord and @hopeteased because they are old friends and we have plotted extensively. I have no problems with unrequited and Raphael will absolutely be the Most Charming to get what he wants, but that isn't romance from any muses who are not those two specific takes on Haarlep. For that matter, chances are, if we're not friends or at least chatting a fair amount, none of my muses will be shippable, because what makes me invest in a ship is really digging into the characters with the other writer, seeing how they met, what their interactions might be, how knowing each other and caring for each other affects them. I like to explore the character development side of things and get an idea of them before I ever fully commit to a ship. What's more, I want to be comfortable talking with the other writer before running a ship with them because, ideally, you won't want to invest in something like that with someone you either can't get along with or who isn't as invested in the thing as you are. ] Furthermore, though, I also have a certain aversion to writing with anyone who won't take the time or interest to write with any except my male muses, because I'm well over a decade into the roleplay fandom in tumblr, and I've seen this game too much not to notice it, directed at me and at others. This isn't a callout of anyone. This was just on my mind and so this is a blanket statement that I want to put out here, because I am old and I am tired and I'm here to write and have fun. Not to have the old writing anxiety creep back up about Well, maybe I don't write them as well as I think, and what if they're Mary Sues and that's the problem? If this seems blunt, my apologies. I'm usually very chill, but I get unapologetically invested in every single one of my muses. I love them to death. I could give whole lectures on pretty much every single one of them about their backstories, their quirks, their motivations, etc. I say that to say this: I try my hardest to show interest in every muse that I know someone has—whether that's likes on headcanon posts if I can't figure out a way for our muses to interact or because I'm a bit slow to approach because anxiety, or if it's by starting threads and sending memes—because I do find all of them interesting and I love all the effort and the thought and the passion and the love that goes into each and every one of the muses I follow. As a result, on the flipside, if a writer gives equal time or at least interest to more than just my male muses, I am far more likely to plot and to write with them, because then I feel like they care about all of my muses, too, rather than feeling like my male muses are being used and the female ones ignored. It's not really a good feeling on either side of that equation when it's any other way.
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ooc: good morning, no icon bc i am. guh. i am so tired rn, but i had to give yall a psa update about stuff going on with me (since i just got back from my doc appointment)
basic tldr; my activity is most likely going to be even more sparse than it is for a while because i'm focused on my mental and physical health (working on regulating my bipolar disorder primarily), as well as some legal issues that i need to address; what activity i do have may be restricted to my current threads and i might not be making ooc update posts very frequently
full information (and miscellaneous ramble-venting) is under the cut
active muse check: surge, laurance, wanderer, kieran
(cw: mental health, general medical and legal talks, venting)
ooc: so breaking news, apparently it turns out my bipolar disorder might be the more major diagnosis between everything that i got checked out a couple weeks ago, i got prescribed some mood stabilizers so i should be getting them in tomorrow
im having to re-set up my insurance bc they fucked me over and cancelled it (we didn't get any of the documents that they were supposed to be giving us, and my acc on their website can prove we didn't receive them) so that's stressing me out
i also had to get bloodwork done today for whatever reason, going there and doing the bloodwork is what gave us the heads up that my insurance was cancelled so i guess i'm glad for it, but also we can't really afford to pay for the bloodwork rn (and barely if at all); i'm glad that i got it done so i can see if i have any physical issues to worry about, but at the same time that payment is gonna fuck us over for a little, cause we barely get by as it is
im also cramping which sucks!!!!! but that's small beans compared to everything else
i mean today already started off pretty shit for me, i only got about 4 hours of sleep cause my anxiety kept me up most of the night (who was surprised that would happen? not me) since i was stressing about the appointment (they're also still ignoring the potential that i could be neurodivergent, and i know damn well that i am, they just keep blaming my issues on everything else that's wrong with me, so that's stressing me out to a pretty strong degree too)
so yeah, considering all my mental health issues and the doctors visits ive basically been having nonstop for the last couple of weeks, my activity on this account is probably going to be even less than it already is; i've just got too much going on to put all my energy into fixating on writing, and even writing my novel is a chore that i've really had to trudge through the mud to finish (i'm still not even done with it)
i will still be around to write on here ofc, but i might restrict myself into not actively searching for any new rp partners for a while; i'm going to try spending my time relaxing and getting my shit sorted before i fully commit to being here as much as i have been. again, activity will still be here all things considered, but i might not be making very many ooc posts like i have been, and as far as dash shenanigans go i might be pretty quiet
my discord is open to mutuals if anyone wants to chat or discuss plots, and my ims on here will always be open as well
sorry for rambling and bitching so much on here i just like to keep yall informed, but yeah the tldr at the top basically explains all the important details outside of my rambling
#:/: ooc#:/: psa#mun msg: aughghghg i feel like shit#mun msg: but hey surge is active again lmao#mun msg: and kieran is back!!!!!! yippee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Which ones of your muses are most likely to get married? Which ones the least? Who wants to get married the most regardless of whether they’ll ever achieve it? Who may get there despite never planning for it?
oooooh boy.... this is a long one.
I'm gonna separate them into some categories first…
Most likely to get married: Wynn, Andris (surprisingly, but i have a reason for this)
Seem likely but I don't know: Penelope
Up in the air: Roderick
Seems unlikely but I don't know: Mikah, Joseph, Lawali
Least likely to get married: Evan ( with a capital No ), Dakota, Vega
Now this is just going off of their personalities, their thoughts on marriage, and how they would respond if asked if they'd like to get married.
Most likely to get married: Wynn, Andris
Wynn more is focused on the thought of having a family than he is on marriage, to be honest, but that doesn't take away from his willingness to get married at all because it's still… him wanting that connection with someone and trusting them enough to spend the rest of his life with them. He's probably the only one of my muses that actively wants to get married at this point. If he doesn't… he'll be okay but I know he'll be a little disappointed.
what Wynn cares about the most is whether or not his partner is ready for that type of commitment. So regardless of how much he wants that for himself, he will be perfectly alright with waiting for his person to be ready with him.
Andris is also one I think would get married aND I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE THINKING. JUST HEAR ME OUT A LIL BIT.
Andris is a very charismatic person. All his… tendencies aside, he doesn't seem like an awful person on the surface at all and often masks his more undesirable traits because he knows that they tend to turn people off. I ( and several others ) just know that he is a terrible, obsessive person because I shout at the rooftops that his flags are redder than a stop sign. If he wanted to get married, Andris would be married. The question is whether or not the person he's getting married to is aware of his true self or not, because he is more than happy to hide pieces of himself in the latter if it affords him just a little more time in what views as a luxury for him.
Seem likely but I don't know: Penelope
Penny just really loves her girlfriend. At this point in time, Penny doesn't see herself with anyone else and would thus… likely end up married to her. Penny is not actively thinking of marriage but it's one of those situations where, whether there is a formal ceremony or not, Penny will just… be married one day. She'll have her wife, some peace of mind, and she'll be perfectly happy with that. She's not rushing towards it by any means but if it comes up in conversation, she'll be like… "Why not"
Up in the air: Roderick
While he DOES have his reservations about marriage, it's more because he has already been married and his wife passed away. Much of his hangups stem from the fact that part of him feels like… he's not ready to move on from her? He is a committed partner and his deceased wife was an integral part of his life. They weren't married for very long, as she passed away when they both were in their 30s. he took that loss very hard.
IN ANY CASE, this does not mean that Roderick is like "fuck marriage". If anything, he still views it as something that is very intimate and sacred--that it's a bond as much as it is a commitment. He's not ready to get remarried and he doesn't know if he'll get to that point anytime soon. He doesn't even know if he wants to be remarried, but he's not turning his nose up at it. He's focused on healing for now.
Seems unlikely but I don't know: Mikah, Joseph, Lawali
LAWALI is pretty indifferent to the concept of marriage. He has nothing substantial to say on it because he… kinda doesn't care? It's one of those "If it happens, it happens." type of deals. and he'll never be the one that pushes marriage unless the person he's with is like… fully locked in with him. He'd be able to look at them and know "Alright this is who I'm going to definitively spend the rest of my life with. I'm praying that it doesn't fizzle out because I really want this." And will want take that leap.
However, because of the freeloader living rent free in Lawali's body, the topic of marriage is a rather…. tenuous one. The adzar won't care that Lawali wants some sort of commitment, honestly, and it would likely attempt to sabotage any relationship Lawali has at some point.
MIKAH… doesn't think they'd be a very good partner, honestly, and thus doesn't plan on getting married. in all the time I've had them, the topic of marriage has come up.. I think five times? one was in an au where they were a fundamentally different person (and it was more a "we have to get married" rather than mikah wanting to, and they ended up saying "lets wait"), one where they thought was a joke ( it was but it also wasn't and it was never brought up again), and the other three times, they actually considered it they expressed that they didn't think it was a good idea ( which resulted in another "lets wait" another two times and an acceptance of it ONCE )
mikah understands the type of person they are and the life they lead. they're under no pretense that they're going to have any sort of "normal" life and thus isn't really… thinking about components that would make their life like that. Marriage doesnt need to lead into having a family, necessarily, but Mikah will convince themself that it does if they think about it too much. That just adds to the list of things they dont really see themself of being… worth of, I guess? So they settle for what they do have. This doesn't mean that they can't have conversations and slowly change their mind but… it's like pulling teeth and it's something that they will always stall on
Now, whenever I think about the topic of JOSEPH and the concept of marriage, I feel like a tiny little hypocrite eating my hypocrite flakes because he is siingleship and i did decide that he would just be married to SOME iteration of Lerato ( @soulsxng ) no matter what. At the same time, though, I DONT feel like a hypocrite because it's… Joseph.
Joey is one of two muses that has obsessive tendencies, the other being Andris. That, coupled with his standoffish behavior ( in part because of his trauma ), doesn't really prop him up with much of an advantage when it comes to partners because he either intimidates most people or straight up doesn't like most people. His circle is very small and he likes to keep it that way to avoid unnecessary, personal issues ( and to reduce the pool of people that will eventually leave him but that's neither here nor there ). All that is to say that Joey's a truly difficult one and under normal circumstances, I don't think he'd at ALL care about the concept of marriage or look at it as just another device others can use to hurt him--given that for much of his life, people he found himself close to were either taken or took advantage of him.
He knows he's grown to be obsessive ( and not the sexy kind ), he knows he's possessive ( also not the sexy kind ), and he knows that he can't be in a normal, healthy relationship. He's mellowed out in his early 40s but that doesn't mean that he's like "Okay I've fixed all my issues".
The case of Joey and Lera, I'd say, is Joey meeting someone that matches his level of freak, pretty much. I do not think Joey would genuinely be invested in someone as much as he is currently invested in Lera because they just… work. They've had disagreements but i don't think they've ever fought or been truly angry with each other while in a relationship -- and that's not on purpose. They understand and accept each other for being awful, which is… I guess some might call it a cop out because of how volatile the personalities of these two characters can be outside of their relationship. However, I see it more as a testament to what kind of person one has to be to marry this man. Joseph has said for himself ( and Dakota ) that people like them will not find love in those from this plane normally… and so far, that has been true.
Least likely to get married: Evan ( with a capital No ), Dakota, Vega
EVAN only learned what a healthy marriage truly looked like only after he'd turned like… 16 or 17. And by that point, he'd already developed certain behaviors or ways of thinking that set him up for failure each and every time.
Evan is not looking for marriage. He's not looking for commitment. He's not looking to settle down. The thought of attempting to do so, honestly, makes him a little nervous because as of now, he has ruined or played a part in ruining most of his relationships. He'll play it off and laugh about it but that's less because he doesn't care and more because he is keenly aware of the issues he has and doesn't plan on fixing them (if not given a little push).
If he took the time to actually look inward and attempt to heal, I would say that perhaps it's possible for him. He's capable of change and does ( in my little Canon ending for my muses ). However, Evan seems more than content to drown whatever issues he has in alcohol and sex and avoid it altogether at the present moment. It's something that likely won't come naturally and if he is driving car in that direction, he will crash it. Part of it will be on purpose ( as if intentional )… and the other part is more akin to that being the only reaction he's ever had.
DAKOTA is another one that doesn't want to get married. Now a lot of that has to do with her job but also… her own emotional turmoil about tying herself to someone like that/being dependent on someone like that.
The first part of it is her job. Now… Koko is, surprisingly, another one where if she truly desired that commitment ( or the farce of it ), she would get it. There are tons of people that would likely clamor for a spot at her side--whether it be for the benefits that come with being married to a mob boss would bring or as a means to make their own influence weigh that much more. Maybe they'd actually be looking to take the crown from her. Either way, there would be a long line outside her door--with each "shark" looking for a taste of something to sink their teeth into for whatever reason… and Dakota is as good a morsel as any. And she knows this.
She's seen other individuals in her role get married--she's seen their spouses targeted. She's seen them get kidnapped and used as leverage. She's seen how easy it is to get the better of someone high up by targeting their spouse. She's done these things to get rivals and adversaries to heel when she needs them to because she knows it's a soft spot. Something like that is a pressure point…. if they matter enough. If not, it's just one more thing that can be taken from them… and perhaps that is what Dakota fears--people getting that close to her to take advantage of a potential spouse--because she has an idea of how they would do it. and while she can prepare for it five different ways, there are ten more ways that could potentiallyy circumvent that. And then ten more after that. and at some point, her spouse would just be a very beloved, but very restricted prisoner at her side.
that, compounded onto the emotional turmoil she went through having to bury her sister just makes Dakota reluctant to consider marriage in general. No matter how many safety nets she put, Cassandra still died and god--that weighs so heavily on her conscious. because no matter who shot her, it was Dakota's responsiblity to make sure that she didn't have to suffer the consequences of what Dakota was doing…. and she failed. if she failed her sister, how long will it take for her to fail her spouse in a similar way? What kind of pain would her enemies inflict on her loved one in an attempt to get to her? Would she have to bury them too, at some point? She certainly thinks she might….and that's not something she's mentally prepared to do. Not again.
VEGA is in a similar situation to Joseph--where I feel like I would be a hypocrite if I said "Yeah no--no marriage to him" without addressing the soulmate-shaped, Astra-sized ( @fatestouch ) elephant in the room. To be quite honest, it's a similar situation, where… he is not going to have normal relationship, but the only difference is that… it doesn't get fixed with Astra. it's made worse.
I don't think he's suited for any traditional type of marriage in the main verse… like at all. i don't want to compare him too much to Joseph because they are two different characters… but they have such parallel stories, i feel. where Joseph has eased into his life and has… some semblance of normalcy ( even if it isn't truly normal ), Vega doesn't have that. he's seen it but he has no personal connection or reason to invest that amount of effort into something that has… little value to him. It, in part, seems like a show put on for everyone else--the rings, the whole song and dance of planning weddings and receptions and rehearsal, the invitations, the hiring of all these extra people to turn something simple into a whole spectacle--it's too much. it's all so… needless, he thinks. With Astra, it is simple ( in his head ). Astra dies and comes back…. no fanfare and no spectacle. If Astra kills him, he dies and comes back, no fanfare… no spectacle.
It's just them.
Unprompted | @nezumivc103221
#🗪 ┊ ⧼ you all are some chatty cathys! ⧽ ⇹ ( asks. )#.Bro this was a fucking slog#.but thank you for the ask!
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*‵ ・ ze frank voice: that's how a chilla do ・ ′
Name / Alias: Chilla as in chinchilla lol
Are you over 18?
Yes / No
WRITING.
Are you selective about who you write with?
No (anyone) / Semi (most people) / Yes (some people) / Highly (few people) / Private (mutuals only).
I only write threads with mutuals, but the non-mutuals who I'm cool with can interact with the light, silly dash comm stuff!
Are you selective about who you follow?
No (anyone) / Semi (most people) / Yes (some people) / Highly (few people).
If your muse is canon, how much do you adhere to canon?
Not at all / A little / Some / Mostly / Strictly / Not Applicable.
She's an OC, baby! She's got her own canon and I have a vision!
What post lengths do you write?
One-Liners / Single-Para / Multi-Para / Novella / All of the aforementioned.
Do you use icons and/or GIFS?
No / Gifs / Icons / Yes / Sometimes.
Do you write on other platforms?
No / Yes
What level of plots do you write?
Unplotted/ Open-Ended Plots / Semi-Plotted / Fully Plotted Epics / All of the mentioned
I just love continuity and stories between characters, but I am realistic about time and commitment and can be flexible. I just hate purposeless and aimless stuff.
How quickly do you usually respond to threads?
Very Slow (more than a month) /Slow (3-4 weeks) / Average (1-2 weeks) / Fast (less than one week) / Very Fast (less than three days)
It depends on my mood and whether I feel like I am in a good headspace to write.
What types of themes do you like?
Adventure / Romance / Fluff / Angst/ Violence / Tragedy / Domestic / Family / All of the aforementioned
Yeah, romance will be an extremely rare thing because I created a canon endgame for Roxy and also... romantic attraction is sorta... an iffy thing for Roxy. More on that later.
WHAT GENRES DO YOU LIKE? ( Feel free to add!)
High Fantasy / Supernatural / Science Fiction / Historical / Horror / Comedy / Romantic / Drama / Action / Smut / Adventure / Espionage / All of the aforementioned
Are there any themes you're uncomfortable writing on your blog? (Not triggers)
No / Yes / Sometimes
Do you have any triggers? How do you request it tagged?
They are more visual triggers that make me genuinely upset like rl g.ore, images of self-mutiliation or self-harm, uncanny valley kind of stuff (again it depends on how I am feeling? It's hard to explain but anything to do with unsettling stares makes me nope so hard).
SHIPPING.
What types of relationships are you open to?
Romantic / Platonic / Familial / Enemies / All of the aforementioned
I feel like nowadays dynamics are too oversimplified and lacking complexity. Yes I like friendships, familial, enemies (muses having beef makes everything extra juicy), etc. I feel like I cannot really encompass a lot of the other stuff I crave so I figured I needed to say a little something about it. Also, if romance happens, it'll be very slow burn and I do not ever autoship my character. Ever.
What types of pre-established relationships are you open to?
Romantic / Platonic / Familial / All of the aforementioned
I don't do pre-established relationships anymore, my writing and my character shine when there are no expectations and just growth through interactions. In short, it's better to fuck around and find out.
Do you have OTPs?
No / Chemistry Only / Yes /
Well, I did create Maciu for Roxy... and for the mutual who's heard me talk about stupid shit about this goofy, loveable himbo, then yeah... that's the OTP.
Do you have NOTPS?
No / Yes / hmmm.
Well... I'm not into forced romances... especially with super hetero m/f ships because it leaves such a bad taste in my mouth when people assume that any sort of positive relationship that Roxy has with a non-blood related man means that they are going to get together. Also... because I had to deal with such grossness in the past around Roxy's asexuality, I literally had to write a post to get people to act right and draw the line with her.
What is your muse's sexual orientation?
Heterosexual / Heteroflexible / Bisexual / Pansexual / Homoflexible / Homosexual / Demisexual / Sapiosexual / Asexual / Still trying to figure it out
What is your muse's romantic orientation?
Heteroromantic/ Heteroflexible / Biromantic / Homoflexible / Homoromantic / Panromantic / Demiromantic / Sapioromantic / Aromantic / Still trying to figure it out / Depends on the muse you're asking.
Are you comfortable writing smut?
No / VERY Selectively / Yes
How early in a relationship do you ship romantically?
Autoship / During plotting / After a couple IC interactions / Several IC interactions / Slow burn / Plot dependent / Never / If it happens it happens
Are you open to toxic ships?
No / Selectively / Yes / I am not sure
I hate that I feel like I need to explain myself a lot, but up to the point with Roxy's character development, I feel like it's less likely she's gonna land herself in toxic relationships with people because she's been there and done that. She's not afraid to put anybody on their asses if they try her patience. And this is by no means me saying that victims are too weak-willed or cannot stand up for themselves. It's more that as soon as Roxy catches onto any sort of fuckery it's over, no exceptions. But toxic relationships don't have to be romantic, sometimes it takes one person to negatively influence your life if you allow them access. That would be interesting, but I don't want to romanticize that.
Are you open to problematic ships?
No / Selectively / Yes / I am not sure This is too broad, but I will say that I have no inclination to write abuse in romance, definitely not age gaps where minors are involved, no to inc*st, anything to do with sexual abuse or r*pe, curing the racist/bigot plots, etc.
Are you open to polyshipping?
No / Selectively / Yes / I am not sure
I mean IF that happens!
Are you an exclusive shipper?
Never / Sometimes / Yes / I would be open to discuss it
I mean, if a ship outside of Roxy's canon actually happens! I went 10 years without a ship here, if that isn't a testament to Roxy's "fickle" demiromanticism, I don't know what is! Canon x OC, or OC x OC, if it happens, let's talk!
Does crack shipping ever happen?
Nope / Yes / depends
My friends, once again, this shit has never happened in all my years here lmfao!
Tagged by: @ama-tcra-su
Tagging: anybody
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I bet you thought this was over, but surprise! I wanted to do one more of the muses that got votes because this was fun lmao. Warning for a brief non-sexual and non-descriptive mention of self-harm.
Right now I'm not going with Jer.emike or any other ship being necessarily default canon ( this may change who knows ), so honestly Michael by default doesn't get much experience romantic or sexual prior to getting, y'know, scooped.
Assumptions based on the alt clothing, piercings, and his sadly horrendous reputation ( which i need to go into detail abt sometime ) mean ppl tend to assume he's open to casual sex / very sexually active. This is incredibly wrong.
Not open to casual sex pretty much at all, although this isn't genuine lack of interest. It's more so a combination of trust issues and the fact that he does self-harm and doesn't want strangers ( or anyone, really ) seeing his scars /wounds.
On that same note, he'll be extremely tentative abt moving beyond fooling around fully clothed with even a committed partner if they don't know abt the self-harm.
Okay, from here on out, mostly lighter topics!!
Let's get started bluntly: playing with his nipples will drive him crazy. He's super sensitive.
High sex drive. Masturbates most days, sometimes twice if it's a slow day.
Literally so easy to turn on if he's attracted to someone. Giving him a boner takes almost no effort so like uhhhh. There's a challenge for you fkdhfkdhjsals
Kiss him for 3 hours straight please.
Loves experimenting and trying new things, just super open-minded. Doesn't mean he'll always like it, but there's only a number of things he's adamantly against even trying.
Will suck dick like his life depends on it, like he will learn how to deep throat and never look back LMAO
Switch ( what's new lmao ), but if he had to choose, he fucking loves to bottom.
Missionary while he's getting fucked? He's a wreck.
Extra loves sex / masturbation because it means getting to kinda turn his brain off for a bit and just Enjoy Something.
Acts like he's so confident but actually getting him comfortable enough to dirty talk and not be embarrassed is A Feat fdkhfadsfhjdsalhd
Pull his hair, it's long for a reason—
BITE HIM.
Very into grinding against / humping his partner.
Into domming / subbing sometimes, but generally prefers just going with the flow in the bedroom, if that makes sense.
So goddamn touch-starved that entering into a romantic & sexual relationship with him means meeting a whole new side of him ( the side that thrives on physical touch ).
Loves rough sex, but lbr he'll fall to pieces over anything romantic. Body worship might make him cry tbh.
Finds jealousy way fucking annoying, sorry. I mean, this isn't technically a sexual headcanon by itself but you get me. He doesn't find it hot, he finds it annoying and insulting. He's valid for this btw flkdhsashdj
Extremely touchy-feely during sex. His hands will be wandering everywhere, he wants to memorize his partner's whole body.
Sex / jerking it as a means to relieve stress? Absolutely.
Overstimulate him. Do it.
So down to get his dick sucked at the drive-in. That's it, that's the headcanon.
Okay most ppl won't be interested in this, but let's talk about it anyway: after being scooped, he's probably not doing sexual stuff. Even if he was still fully capable, he experiences a lot of chronic pain and just generally isn't in the mood. He def has times here and there where he's frustrated, but y'know. He's still open to romantic shipping post-scooping but please remember that he's a rotting corpse missing most of his innards lmao.
#˖ ♡ 𝒽𝑒𝒶𝒹𝒸𝒶𝓃𝑜𝓃. » modern tragedy ( michael afton )#☽—— ⸢ u s f w ⸥#f n a f /#sinday#suggestive#self-harm mention tw#posts that make me want him to feel loved by somebody soooo badly
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🩵 lounie tunesssss
muse relationship headcanon game
who curses more?
well, as far as i know, they both cuss a lot, but loux's gotta take the cake on this one. sometimes, every other word out of his mouth, literally, is fuck or some variation of, and he says shit like it's going out of style. like that one song by blink-182? that's ya boi, poppin' off at the mouth.
who is more patient?
i feel like.......loux....loux is more patient than loni. no no, i think about it, and how this man is willing to wait FORTY YEARS to be with her. forty years, turbo. forty. he waits. that is the longest any of my muses have ever waited for anyone or really even anything (hydre doesn't count >:/). he is a man determination, commitment, and sheer fuckin' will--
who does the driving?
loni 100%. loux can't drive and she shouldn't let him....ever.
who is louder? who is quieter?
i think they're about matched. they both can be quiet, both can be loud, and it seems to pan out at about a 50/50 imo. they just shake hands and dance to dirty r&b songs on this point, and i love that for them.
who is more physically affectionate?
this seems to be another both of them thing, but i'd still venture to say loux far surpasses her in this respect. he's always got his hands on her in some way, always kissing on her, holding her, just - touching her constantly, maybe even to the point of it being annoying. that's his wife, she can live with being wanted and desired 24/7 🙄
who is more likely to tease the other?
i think they're equally likely to tease each other, one more...flagrantly sexually than the other, but-- boffum, m8. you know as well as i do how bad they can get too uwu
who is better with time management?
both of them are good about it, empirically. loux has the benefit of fancy magical tools that can sort of bend time and space for him to get anywhere at a moment's notice, so he's maybe just faster, but i'd think it's pretty fair to say they manage their time well. i don't see either one of them being late on anything, literally ever. and in the offchance they are late to something, it's because loux got a little too handsy lbr
who wins the arm wrestling matches?
loni, hands down. not because loux lets her win, not because he's weak, because never. mans is too competitive to just let anyone do anything skjdfhs but genuinely i do think loni beats him out here, cos he's not as muscular as she is and he's a good sportsman. without all his magic, using only his physical strength - loses to his wife, who is stronger than him.
who controls the music in the car ride?
loux and loni share music, so it doesn't matter. i fully headcanon this.
who covers dinner when they order in?
loni would insist, i'm sure of it, and loux would fight her on it. he will absolutely not let her pay for dinner. he is so determined to be a provider and a protector in his own way, he just - will not. he already paid, in fact, with cash because they used his phone to order. i am telling you, turbo. they're just gonna have to fight over this until they're old godly bitties in the sky. not sorry uwu
who is more outgoing? who is more shy?
loux is the most outgoing. he's an idiot, but he's truly a social butterfly, life of the party, fratboy ringleader, class clown type of guy. loni's the shier one, of the two, for sure. i think? that sounds right to me. loux's here to do backflips and steal the show (which includes taking all the heat, too)
who has the more outlandish fashion sense?
loux. i have an entire pinterest board to prove it...! you cannot tell me loni has anything in her closet that could top loux's >:U
who starts the tickle fights? who ends them?
HMMMM loux, then loni. but then also loni, then loux.
who has the darker/more "edgy" sense of humor?
loux, hands down. i don't think i need to elaborate here ksjdfhsd but i do think he'd make a few jokes that'd piss loni off or disgust her.
who is more competitive when it comes to games?
i think it's a toss-up here, although i don't really imagine them playing video games together. maybe some ddr at the local arcade on a date or two? otherwise the 'games' they're playing are probably in the bedroom--
who has the bigger appetite? the bigger sweet tooth?
i'm...admittedly not sure. loux eats and could put away a mountain of food, but i don't think his appetite is really all there. he loves to cook though, so he ends up eating somewhat regularly anyway, but he has a generally low appetite, i think. oh but he loves sweets. loves sweets. and is more than happy to share with loni.
who is more likely to get in a confrontation in public?
i'm calling it 50/50 here because loux'll throw down with anybody over nothing and loni is a tough cookie who don' take no shit. 1+1=2 for me, mhmm.
who hosts the parties/hangouts? who organizes them?
loux doesn't party as much as anyone thinks. he just shows up, sells the goods, does a little, and nopes out. hangouts are different - he is literally up her ass right now begging for a date tomorrow lbr. loux. but also loni does too... loux is just insane about her so naturally--
who is better at cooking? do they ever cook for each other?
loni is not allowed in his kitchen except to sit there and look pretty and taste what he makes. she will find a way to burn water and mans can't have his etoufee fucked up. he loves her, of course, but girl do not even think about filling a pot with water. loux's a perfectionist, unfortunately, when it comes to food and he can be such a brat about it too.
who is more likely to engage in dangerous and/or illegal behavior?
they both are, but loux moreso, i think. i mean, he's got a rap sheet a mile long. :I from public indecency to capital murder and just about everything in between. he loves breaking the law, and killing people, and hustling, and committing fraud, tax evasion, theft, torture, more murder, arson... okay, i shouldn't say he loves it because he doesn't actually, but it is all very fun for him.
who is more likely to notice when something is wrong with the other?
thaaaat really depends. they're both very sensitive to each other in their own ways, be it emotionally or sensorily. like loux would notice right away if something physical was wrong with loni, and he's usually pretty good about the emotional stuff even if he is a little unconventional or A Lot about it. i think loni would be able to tell right away if something was wrong with loux physically, but maybe not emotionally since he locks his shit all the way down and it's usually hard to tell how he's actually feeling without him physically expressing it. um, something like that?
who does the talking in public settings (i.e. to the waiter at a restaurant)?
i feel like they'd take turns. loux getting to be a gentleman sometimes, loni getting to be the proverbial 'daddy' other times. they defend each other, they speech together, they sing together, they yell at people together, literally prove me wrONG TURBO
who is more likely to extend a helping hand & provide emotional support?
uh, emotional support? maybe loni. loux will probably default to physical stuff and small conversation before he approaches the meat. it's just how he is. this could change over time to be more even between the two, though.
who is the bigger prankster? do they get the last laugh or do they suffer for it?
loux, and he gets the last laugh. he also suffers dearly for it. marriage :sparkles: uwu
#☿ || Asks.#✘ // Lounie Tunes; Loni.#maljefe#/ let me know if i'm wrong on some of these but also you can't change my mind on others skjdhfsd#/ idk i love them
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Late night Headcanon musings:
Listen Harlivy is absolutely my ride and die but Also love the possibility of Harley and Ivy being in a polyamorous relationship with Catwoman while she's dating/married to Batman.
I'm talking parks and rec esque scene of Batman saying "This is my wife Catwoman, and over there is her girlfriend Ivy, and next to Ivy is Ivy's other girlfriend Harley, Harley and Ivy are both dating my wife but I'm not dating them, also over there is my boyfriend Superman. Oh and both Superman and I are kind of in a relationship with Wonder Woman? It's complicated."
Also Selina knows Bruce's secret identity, and Bruce knows her and Clark's and Diana's secret identity, but Ivy and Harley don't know anyone but Selina's secret identity in this relationship. Bruce tries to maintain his veneer of secrecy to the best of his ability. Lois Lane is in on the shenanigans with Diana and Clark and knows Clark is dating Batman but she doesn't know Bruce's secret identity. Given the chance Lois will heckle Batman about keeping her man safe.
Diana is loosely with Bruce and Clark and Lois but doesn't fully commit to any serious romantic relationship because she's got so many other things to deal with to bother with serious romance.
Just please I'd much prefer healthy open relationships and polyamorous relationships than cheating. Clark is too upstanding to cheat! Bruce and Diana have very strong morals! Selina may be shady at times but she does indeed have lines she won't cross, as do Ivy and Harley. Even if they fancy another person, they care about their current partners enough to forego pursuing a new person if their current partners say no.
Thanks for coming to my 3am ramblings I'm here every week-
#harlivy#dc headcanon#headcanon#musings#ramblings#polycule#batman#catwoman#harley quinn#poison ivy#also selina absolutely cucks bruce#i am 100% serious#you telling me batman ISN'T a cuck?#that man is absolutely a cuck
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SHIPPING INFO. | answer the following for your muse(s) so people know how shipping works on your blog.
what’s your otp for your muses? i don't have any. i enjoy exploring ships way too much and believe every ship dynamic has smth new to bring to the table.
what are you willing to rp when it comes to shipping? i want to explore everything. the good, the soft, the cute, the bad, the frustrating, etc. i want to get to know our characters as individuals and as a couple. i want to explore them as real people. i want them to sometimes disagree. i want them to mess up. i want them to be caring. i want them to be awkward. i want them to sometimes behave in ways they otherwise wouldn't because they are in love. i want to explore the "perfect" ending and the non-perfect ending (love aus) and everything in between. i want to watch them grow as individuals and as a couple. i want to watch them navigate complicated situations and come out on the other side (or not - break ups are a thing).
how large does an age gap have to be to make it uncomfortable? depends on what i'm writing and how old the characters are. generally 10 years is my cut off point.
are you selective when shipping? i'm open to all things but that doesn't mean it'll lead to an actual long-term ship. also, for me 80% of shipping (if we want a solid ship, not exs or flings) comes to down how you communicate ooc. i've had good ship ideas going but we didn't really develop the ship occ which is a huge no for me. if i'm writing my character in love with yours, it's mandatory for me that i want get to know your character and you want to get to know mine. if you can't tell me why your character would love mine / what they'd love about mine and why they'd want to be with them, i'm out. if you don't want to get to know my character, i'm out. if you think of your character as the "main" character in the ship, i'm out. if you don't brainstorm, i'm out. we can write other things but not a ship.
how far do steamy moments have to go before they’re considered nsfw? grinding. clothes coming off or being pushed aside.
who are other muses that you ship your muses with? too many. i'm not shy about it so if i ship with someone you'll probably see me yapping about it on the dash.
does one have to ask to ship with you? if you want to just clown around, no. i love impromptu stuff and don't take casual shipping dynamics that seriously. idk. personally i see it as going out with someone and seeing where things go, you're not exactly committed. but if you want to explore something long-term between our characters, yes.
are you multiship? yes. i've spoken about this before but i don't do mains unless i created the character specifically for the plot and/or we've been regularly talking about the ship for months.
are you ship obsessed or ship more-or-less? i don't care about romance in real life, i'm fully a platonic and familiar relationships girly, in media romance is the most boring thing to me (my best friend's wedding is my fav romantic comedy which should tell you a lot). so i'm ship-obsessed with roleplaying. i love exploring romantic relationships. HOWEVER, (this is for serious / long-term ships only) i'm only ship-obsessed if we actually explore the ship, if we view them as individuals who have their own stories and personalities who choose to be in a relationship. i don't care about only writing smut or romance - a ship in my opinion is about more than that. also please don't take this as me not caring about platonic dynamics. i think everyone who writes platonic dynamics with me will attest that i care about them as much as i care about romantic dynamics.
what is your favorite ship in your current fandom(s)? don't have one. if we have a ship and talk about it regularly, it's a fav to me.
finally, how does one ship with you? if you just want to clown around or test the waters, just send me memes. if you want to actually plot something more detailed or long-term, just send me a message and share your thoughts. i do ask that you remember that there's two characters in a traditional ship, so yours won't always be the main focus - my character is equally important.
tagged by: @heyhey-sensei thank youtagging: i think a lot of you have already answered this but if you haven't, please consider yourself tagged!
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BOOK REVIEW ROUNDUP - A Trio of Quick Classics
This past month I took a bit of a break from non-fiction. I was feeling burnt-out on facts and figures, and no matter how much they dress it up a science book is by neccessity going to include some science. So instead of reading more non-fiction, I spent most of June reading some classics! Here's three that were quick, easy, and also pretty good:
#1: A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens
It's a classic for a reason! Brief synopsis: Ebeneezer Scrooge is a miserly businessman who steals even the coal from his worker's fire, and he's visited on Christmas Eve by three ghosts who attempt to change his wicked selfish ways! I honestly found this a little difficult to get into - a quirk of Dickens's writing style, where he'll fill a page with musings on the shape of a door-knocker because he's getting paid by the word - but once it gets going, it goes. It doesn't let up, as we move from one ghost to the next, and it's a heartwarming and touching story which is helped by humanising Scrooge with a tragic past on several levels. The ghosts are memorable and witty, and they provide some much-needed lessons for Scrooge. We all know the story, and it ends with a Happily Ever After. A little slow to start, but excellent as it goes.
#2: The Outsider by Albert Camus
Also known as The Stranger, this novel by Albert Camus is about the injustice of the justice system. It follows Mr Mersault, a Frenchman living in Algeria, who seemingly feels nothing the way he is supposed to. On the day of his mother's funeral he is tired, but not sad, and in the days after he returns to his life as normal. When he falls in with the wrong crowd and kills a local, his trial focuses more on his personality and his apparent lack of emotion than on his actions or the events surrounding the murder.
The Outsider resonated with me, in part because I see the justice system every day, but also because it's easy to feel like my emotions do not match people's expectations at any given point. It can be seen as a scathing indictment of the justice system's callous disregard of mental health - where judges have the right to lock you up indefinitely for any crime, if they believe you are not mentally "well" enough to simply go to jail; and where police are the first responders to any emergency, and are not trained to deal with a mental health crisis, so they usually resort to their standard tactics: brute force and arrests. I feel Mersault's pain as the jury and the crowd in court judge him for his idiosyncracies and quirks, rather than for the crime he committed. It's a quick read, and one with unexpected depth.
#3: The Thirty-Nine Steps by John Buchan
So of the three, this was my least favourite. That's mainly because it starts off with a wildly anti-semitic plot point. Our protagonist, straight-talking adventurer Richard Hannay, is fed up with life in London, where he's spending his days going from one function to another and talking with the most boring diplomats and businessmen. Just when he's thinking of throwing it all in and heading back to Africa, a man turns up on his doorstep with a tale to tell: there's a shady group of people controlling the actions of the world governments and they're aiming to plunge the world into war! Buchan is not coy about naming the Jews here, and he'll leave you with that impression for fully half the book, so I'm going to spoil it now and reveal that, surprise! The Jews have nothing to do with the government-controlling world-war plot! Turns out the first guy was a British spy who just so happened to be suuuper-anti-semitic and blamed every plot on them. Good job his death is the catalyst to get the plot started! Suddenly Hannay must dodge secret-society goons and the Metropolitan Police as he escapes London for his childhood home of Scotland, meets a bunch of people along the way who help him out, and generally has a cracking good adventure for a few weeks.
Anyway, it turns out it's the Germans orchestrating the whole world-war thing, Hannay uncovers one of the goons disguised as the First Sea Lord stealing naval secrets, and the whole story culminates in a showdown at a townhouse overlooking the sea in Kent, which is extraordinarily well-written and made me worry that Hannay had in fact got the whole thing wrong! It's a shame that after that, the ending is kinda a downer: despite stopping the leak of national secrets and taking down the Black Stone, our secret society bent on world destruction, the march to war is now inevitable, and Hannay enlists and is bumped up to Captain immediately. He considers it a noble endeavour; there's no mention that he has failed utterly in his purpose, save perhaps for preventing the war turning the war in Germany's favour with British naval secrets being stolen.
Overall, it's the kind of rip-roaring adventure you'd see in kid's fiction not too long ago, only with more adult themes and some dated references. And racism. A whole lot of racism.
Conclusion
Look, sometimes you just have to read some classics. If I were ranking them, The Outsider comes first, followed by A Christmas Carol and then The Thirty-Nine Steps is a distant third. The other two are just a little deeper, and they're not steeped in a general first-world-war era xenophobia. I would say they're all worth a read - The Thirty-Nine Steps if only for its pacing and as a quintessential example of an adventure novel.
Overall, if you need a break from your usual fare, you can't go wrong with a classic. Especially if they're less than two-hundred pages.
#book review#fiction#classic literature#A Christmas Carol#The Stranger#The Thirty-Nine Steps#Charles Dickens#Albert Camus#John Buchan
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Agree with the majority of people that the Ayshe-Norman conflict needed to be expanded upon because it is such a letdown to tease the moral quandary of one of your protagonists who's been pulled back from the brink and objectively committed grievous wrongs reckoning with what he's wrought, only to put a pin it and vaguely nod to it later on as not being entirely settled (because how could it be in such a short amount of time). To be fair, things had already simmered down by the time they meet in the capital, and I like to at least partially contribute that to her interactions with Don and Gilda, but Norman has yet to be shown initiating any act of restitution. It helps that Shirai acknowledges this was an unsatisfactory conclusion to the conflict and meant to further elaborate upon it, but for now we're left in limbo.
#going with ayshe bc i think she deserves it and tbh it would just be more interesting to detail whatever happened there w her??? #like some internal monologue or some follow up even if just a bit #sorry idk how to put it into words (via @trainerbea)
What you said makes sense! You even went further by centering it around Ayshe's perspective after the only follow-up we receive is this panel from chapter 181:
And you can make inferences from it—them being in such close physical proximity while she allows him to hold one of her new puppies, beings she considers part of her family—but still, nothing compared to a more fleshed-out chapter or light novel story. We're never privy to the full spectrum of emotions she regards him or the other Lambda kids with, which is kind of important, given how she's the entire other side of that conflict.
Whether it was a regular 19- to 21-page chapter or a 35-40-bonus-length one, I could see Shirai keeping it primarily in her perspective or alternating between the two, but after what we received for the resolution up until now it couldn't be primarily from Norman's; it would feel too unbalanced.
#I'm still waiting for the Ayshe oneshot Shirai did promise us so... #but! I really don't want to see Ray addressing his relationship with Isabella #why? because it's more fun to think about it yourself #and see different interpretations of various writers and artists #everything else would be great too #I'd also love to see more of Isabella's time in the Headquarters as trainee #and how she changed over the years (because she changed) #not to forget - how James did assemble his supporters #that would be great too #but first I need more Ayshe stuff (via @officersnickers)
After all our chats you know how much of a sucker I am for Ray and the rest of the Grace Field children having an open discussion about the woman who raised them and everything she put them through, so I would 100% be down for that if it had enough room to breathe. If the focus is centered around Ray, I don't feel it would be impossible even within the confines of a regular-length chapter. However, outside of it being directly addressed in a dialogue with other characters (most likely with interspersed flashbacks), I feel like the best framing would be musings over the course of years.
But as noted in other tags, I should have opened the choice up to all the Grace Field kids sorting this out; this was me getting hung up on how messy the last interaction Ray has with her is (on top of, you know, all the prolonged trauma) when the last time Norman saw her she was handing him over to Peter and his nerves looked absolutely fried.
#ray addressing his relationship with isabella is so low on my priority list honestly bc i doubt it would be done in a way that satisfies me #i’m biased but i just don’t think shirai has the guts or willpower to address that implied abuse with any kind of nuance #the strained relationship between mother and son #nothing that can ever truly be mended #i want ray to loath her and i don’t think shirai can really hit that #jointly though i wouldn’t want a chapter like that that solely focuses on ray (isabella was norman and emma’s mom too!) (via @whamss)
We do have the December 2020 exhibition interview where Shirai state she's a (morally) poor person for being taken in by the belief that her actions as a Mom are entirely noble.
I do agree though that the chances of Ray coming out of that hypothetical chapter fully loathing her would be nonexistent with the way her death is framed.
#By this point WSJ should give them the special 35-40 page chapters because 20 pages would not be enough for any plot line above #Of course I would choose the Ayshe-Norman conflict first #But I remember there being an option for fans to choose whether they want to see how Mujika and the demons are post-canon #I've been so curious about that every time I remember it (via @thathilomgirl)
Ooo Mujika post-canon going-ons would be good, too. My initial thoughts are with how bizarrely and conveniently smoothly we see the transfer of power to her thanks to Leuvis' grand display that any immediate conflict afterward would feel awkward and contrived, but as a vehicle for delving into more of the demon world's culture and history and/or there potentially being a significant timeskip by demon lifespan standards to see the long-term effects of her reign, it could be neat.
And yes in an ideal world we'd be getting way more than a single chapter to feel the full impact of any of these scenarios without large chunks lost to timeskips of a few months or years. (I've always got the prayer circle going for a Shaman King situation playing out with more chapters being added in a perfect edition rerelease.)
*The kids integrating into the human world and the potential struggles they face post-finding Emma.
**Ray addressing his relationship with Isabella, either by himself or with other characters.
Interested if people will specify a difference between what they think is most needed and what potentially requires an entire arc to properly address versus what they think can reasonably be addressed in a single chapter, and if the standard chapter length of 19-21 pages versus the 35- to 40-page length of Isabella's and Krone's respective bonus chapters factors in at all.
#“forced to leave everything behind her to live with a bunch of people she barely knows. liberation for ayshe feels strangely tragic”#whamss that tag's gently killing me#Long Post#TPN Polls#FSS Polls#FSS Chatter#Return to Grace Field Arc#TPN 177#TPN 181.3#Human World Arc#TPN 181#Post-Canon#Norman#Ayshe#Ray#Isabella#Isabella and Ray's Incredibly Fraught and Complicated Relationship Tag#Norayshe#for tagging purposes#Tags#Read More
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If you knew what the bluebirds sing (pt. 14)
Royal! Viktor x gender neutral reader, 2.2k words, no warnings
hi babes <3 here we go again. honestly, i feel like maybe the last four chapters or so could have all been packed into one chapter, but i'm writing this as we go along here, so eh. anyway, i hope you like this one <3 i'm trying to use this fic to buffer away my anxiety about real world shit, so you're getting a mid-week update instead of the usual weekend ones!
tags:@aggressa @obsessive-sapphic @shadow-pancake9 @agatemermaid @scorpio-echo @kalisbury @viktoryscreech @ivetoldamillionlies @twilightdollie @cassandras-musings @kaimerra
and special thanks to @basichextechml , @namethatneuron and the anon that gave their thoughts on what our boi here would smell like!
The night goes by in a haze.
Which is to say, you sort of feel like you’re floating. Like the air in the room is static, the whole world asleep.
The bed is a weird combination of soft and hard, supportive in a way your own cheap second-hand mattresses had never been, and his sheets feel expensive, and something about the whole situation was…calming.
At first you try to tell yourself that it has more to do with the bed than the fact that you were sharing it with him, but that’s a shallow lie at best. Something to hide behind to avoid looking truth in the eyes.
The bed is warm, and even with your eyes closed, he is a solid presence next to you. And every second you spend even remotely conscious you’re just sinking deeper into that feeling. Into the comfort. Just reveling in the bliss of it all, letting it surround you and fill your veins with something warm and glowing.
It makes you feel a little bit guilty, like you maybe shouldn’t be enjoying it as much as you were. Like focusing on just this small amount of closeness and holding onto it this tightly was something you weren’t supposed to do, like stealing a cookie when no-one was looking. But you’re still committing every second of it to memory the best you can, like you’re trying to store this feeling for later, because–
Well, because there’s no point in passing by that kind of warmth. The world didn’t offer up happiness easily, so you would take any small joy you could get. Even if it left you feeling like maybe you were just a bit too desperate, assigning too much weight onto such a small thing.
But you would take what you could get.
And even though the classy mattress feels a bit strange and foreign, it’s still the best you’ve slept in ages.
You only stir from sleep once before morning, and when you do, it’s to a soft silence and gentle darkness that wraps around you like a second blanket.
You’re confused, at first. About where you are, about what happened, and why your bed is warmer than normal. The memories bleed back to your mind slowly, bit by bit – the guards, the bath, the quiet conversations.
The warm body pressed against yours.
There’s a split-second calm before the storm, when you just drink in that feeling, before fully registering what was actually going on.
The room was still dark, the sun wasn’t up yet, and if you had to guess you would say it wouldn’t be for a few hours. That was good, at least. But you’re curled up against him, way closer than you were planning on getting, legs tangled together and an arm thrown over his body.
You tense when you realize this. You’re not sure if he’s awake, but you still instinctively breathe out a quiet, broken sorry and move away, lifting off your arm as gently as you can. In the darkness, the movement feels bigger than it is, and for a second you feel like you’ve definitely crossed some line here, and you’re not sure what’s on the other side of it.
He breathes out a deep sigh, and you feel like time stands still.
“You don’t need to apologize.” He says quietly, his voice just a quiet rumble.
You commit that to memory, too. The way his voice sounds like this; quiet, rough, and close. It becomes one of those things you shouldn't think too much about, but your brain files it away automatically, without question, instantly labeled as important – save for later.
“I’m pretty sure there’s some rule about how I’m not supposed to touch you without permission.” You note, trying to retain some normalcy in the situation, and trying to keep your mind from spiraling too far. Trying to jump back over to the safer side of that metaphorical line you’d crossed.
He doesn’t answer. Not right away, anyway.
Instead, he shifts enough to see your face, and even in the darkness, his eyes seem to almost glow. He meets you at your eye level, on his side on the mattress, mirroring your position.
“You have my permission.” He says, the words quiet but crystal clear.
For a few seconds, you feel like you’re standing on the edge of something again. But this time the other side of it is a lot clearer – and you’re not sure if that makes it more or less scary.
He doesn’t seem offended. He seems calm, and somehow, it’s infectious, making the nerves that were stirring inside you settle.
“But that doesn’t mean I would necessarily recommend it.” He adds, with something sad laced just under the words.
“What do you mean?” You mutter, your mind still a little hazy from sleep.
Honestly, you weren’t totally sure you weren’t still asleep. The entire world felt hazy, like this, dark and quiet and warm, and the way he was looking at you didn’t help make it feel any more real. There was something deep in his eyes, and – sure, maybe that was just the darkness, and his eyes were always intense, so it made sense they would be even more so up close, but the way he looked at you now was piercing.
But the heavy beat of your heart feels real, the weight of the blankets solid around your body, and all the little traces of him around you seemed just a little bit too detailed to be just figments of your imagination.
Like the warmth of his body, the silky smoothness of the expensive sheets, his scent enveloping you – black tea, and old books, and something strange you couldn’t quite place – and, honestly, you weren’t sure your dreams would ever be able to get all these little details right.
And there was the fact that he hadn’t pulled away. He was still close to you, almost painfully close, just a breath short from touching, watching you patiently.
“I mean that no matter how much I might enjoy that, it’s not something I can ask of you.” He answers, the words slow and quiet. Like an unpleasant truth that he had accepted a long time ago.
You furrow your brows a bit on instinct.
It’s a short sentence, really, but there’s a lot of information in it. It’s right there, underneath the words, hanging in the air between you two as your brain tries to catch up to what it means.
“Okay,” You say slowly, “And what if I want to touch you?”
Each word feels like a step on thin ice, and waiting for his reaction feels like waiting for any cracks to appear.
He just looks at you, for a moment.
“Then you have my permission.” He repeats, the words simple and light. "But I think that you should think very hard about what you do next."
It almost sounds like a warning, the way he says the last part. With something heavy in his voice.
"Trust me, I already have."
It’s not a lie. You had been thinking about it. Way more than what felt appropriate, in fact.
He’s so close already that it doesn’t take much for you to lean your forehead against his. It’s a small movement, shifting closer, but it changes a lot; you can both hear and feel the small, shaky sigh he lets out, you can feel his warmth again, and it feels right, and your legs brush his under the blankets. You close your eyes, just drinking in the feeling.
“And you are sure you want to do this?” He asks, barely above a whisper.
“Yes.”
The word is light, simple. Honest.
He takes a deep breath and nods slightly, just a small barely-there movement. It makes his hair brush against your face.
There are a thousand little questions that hang in the air above you. But you ignore all of them, for now, just focusing on the moment. For now, it was enough that he was there. Sure, realistically, you knew that morning would come and all this peace would shatter into pieces, but that didn’t matter, not yet. You would take any happiness you could get before then.
“And that goes both ways, you know.” You add quietly, “You can touch me too, if you want to.”
For a few seconds, he stays still. And then, very carefully, he lifts a hand, running it along the side of your body before settling at your waist. His touch is gentle and slow, but it still feels intense. Way more so than what was logical – by all accounts, he was barely even touching you, and yet your entire body registered it like it was the most important thing that had happened in ages.
“Is this okay?”
“Yeah,” You answer, and it almost comes out as a sigh. “I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t.”
The only answer he gives is a quiet hum. He stays like that, for a moment – quiet, close, still.
“I just…don’t want you to feel like you have to do any of this.”
“Viktor.” You say, soft but pointed, hoping it would pull him away from whatever doubts he was stumbling into. “I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t want to be.”
He's quiet for a long moment again.
“Do you promise?”
“Yes. I promise.”
Time stands still again, and you settle into this new intentional closeness, curling a little bit closer to him.
You fall asleep like that, drifting away into the hazy weightlessness and listening to his steady breathing.
When morning comes around for real, waking up is weird. You almost don’t want to let go of the sticky-sweet world of dreams, but when you do, reality is almost as good. He is still close, his body pressed against yours, and for a moment, you just revel in that in-between world of not-yet-tomorrow.
Until he sighs deeply, and shifts, running a hand through his hair.
He doesn’t need to say anything out loud for you to know what it means. The sun was almost up, and it was time for you to go.
Your own clothes are still wet and cold from earlier, and you grimace a bit picking them up – they serve as a sharp reminder of the real world, outside this room.
You tuck them away, not wanting to wear them, and pick through the clothes he had gotten for you last night instead. They would do, a few more layers on top of what had worked as pajamas. It was good enough.
If you were lucky, no-one would even see you on the way to your room. You would need to hang up your old clothes to dry, and get the borrowed ones back to him at some point, but that could all wait.
For now, you just focus on the simple task of sneaking back out without being caught.
He watches from the bed silently as you gather yourself and prepare to slip out of the door. The sun isn’t fully up yet, but it's getting close – the sky was brighter, and the first rays of orange sunlight were already starting to paint the windows. It highlights some of the dust floating in the air, and somehow that makes the silence in the room feel just that much more tangible.
It feels like the rest of the world is still asleep. Like time itself was still a little bit drowsy, moving more slowly than normal, just dragging on, not having quite kicked life into full gear yet.
Realistically speaking, someone in the castle was awake. Someone always was. Night-shift guards, if no-one else. This close to morning someone would probably be in the kitchen too, getting the ovens hot and the coffee brewing. But somehow it still felt like you and him could have been the only people awake in the whole world, as long as you were inside this room.
Rio chirps quietly in her closure, and you feed her a flower before you go. Viktor just watches, quietly.
You stop before walking out the door, pausing in your movements, taking one last chance to linger in this moment a little bit longer.
"I'm assuming that this never happened?" You say quietly, not quite meeting his eyes and trying not to let the slowly-fermenting bitterness show in your voice. Considering the first night you two had shared in the kitchen, you already knew the answer you were going to get, but saying it out loud still felt a little bit harsh. Like speaking something into existence, making it real, solid.
"Right." He sighs, "Yes."
You nod, just a small barely-there movement, and you’re not sure if he even sees it. But it ends the conversation, and you slip out of the door quietly, and sneak back out to your own room, avoiding all the guards on your route.
The rest of the day almost feels like a dream, too, and you spend most of it inside your own head, deep in your thoughts.
And when you go to bed that night, it feels colder and emptier than ever before.
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