#because i feel. so exhausted. just existing. jfjdjdjdhdjsjsakajid
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#* **** ** **. good night!!!!!!!!!!!#🤣🤣🤣😂........ ahfjcjfbf#omg it'll never ever get better i should really just kill myself. JYJYHYH#i hate it so much i hate that i have to work snd i feel my brain die. when i just wanna put my energy into growing as a person#ever since i have this job there's just this delay in everything and i need to genuinely quit to Move Forward.but yeah overall i'm just like#lol. like what. do i ido. ifeel stupud#my brain is soooo. fucked like i literally tjink i'll get like alzheimers at age 27 or something and i have no energy to even talk to people#it's . exhausting me and it worries me because i wnanan connect to people and i wanna BE SOMEONE WHO IS ACTUALLY LIKE . intelligent and good#at things and is not just Wasting Her Life Kxjxhdjdj#i know i'm just trying to survive and that's the best i can give . but what if it stays like this forever#i odn't wanna jsut survive and do nothing with my life because of it. i want to be alive. i haven't felt connected to myself since so long#aujfcjfhshs. Ajfjahajdjd#i really miss my ex too i miss him so much but i am so scared that i can't even talk to him bwcause i've gotten worse. he will just be like#i hope you can get better soon. god i just wanna be okay now. i'm tonna cry#i hate everything like everythings pissing me off i'm becoming so miserable#i know i shoudl be loved snd appreciated even at my worse but i don't think people can rven reach me anymore (?) even if i want them to#because i feel. so exhausted. just existing. jfjdjdjdhdjsjsakajid#Agghhiufdjj. okay sleeping now#verbalizing feelings is so exhausting too. but i need to try doing this#i'm actually so afraid of what is happening to my brain like it's not funny y djdhdhjdjdhd
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