#because he said you could get married in it
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F1 GRID | proposals
୨ৎ : featuring : max verstappen, lewis hamilton, george russell, carlos sainz, charles leclerc, lando norris, oscar piastri ୨ৎ : synopsis (requested) : he surprises you... with a ring.
୨ৎ : genre : romance & fluff ୨ৎ : tws : suggestive themes ୨ৎ : word count : 4586
୨ৎ masterlist ୨ৎ
ᡣ𐭩 a/n : a plead for more fluff, your prayer has been answered!
ʚ・max verstappen
“is it just me, or has max been acting weird lately?” you asked your friend as you absently fiddled with the hem of your jacket in the paddock. max was preparing for qualifying, and despite your effort to focus on the hum of activity around you, your thoughts kept circling back to him.
your friend shot you a curious look. “weird how? do you think he’s hiding something?”
you shrugged, letting out a small laugh to downplay your growing suspicion. “i don’t know… it’s not like he’s being distant or anything. he’s just been—antsy. like he’s waiting for something. it’s weird.”
your friend raised an eyebrow, clearly amused by your overthinking. “maybe he is hiding something,” they teased. “or maybe you’re just overanalyzing.”
you huffed out a laugh, but the thought lingered.
later that evening, you met max for dinner at a cozy restaurant tucked away from the usual chaos of race weekends. the two of you had managed to carve out this little slice of normalcy amidst the whirlwind of his career, and you always treasured it.
but tonight, something felt different.
max was his usual self—sweet, attentive, and playful—but there was an edge to him, like he was holding his breath. you’d caught him glancing at you more than usual, his leg bouncing slightly under the table.
you set your glass down and decided to just ask. “alright, max, what’s going on? you’ve been acting—”
before you could finish, the lights in the restaurant suddenly dimmed.
“what the—?” you muttered, looking around in confusion as candles flickered to life on the table.
and then, from the shadows, a few familiar faces emerged—your closest friends, your family, all smiling warmly at you.
your breath caught. “what is happening?” you asked, your voice barely above a whisper as you turned back to max.
but when your eyes met his, he was no longer sitting. he was kneeling.
“max…” you started, your heart pounding as he smiled up at you, his blue eyes shimmering with emotion.
“let me talk before you say anything,” he said with a soft laugh, his voice slightly shaky but full of warmth. “i know i’ve been weird lately—sorry about that. i’ve just been planning this day over and over in my head. i wanted it to be perfect because…”
he took a deep breath, and you saw the slightest tremor in his hands as he held out a small velvet box. “because i love you more than i can put into words. you’ve changed my life in ways i never thought possible, and i can’t imagine spending another moment without you by my side. so…”
he opened the box to reveal a stunning ring, and your eyes blurred with tears. “will you marry me?”
for a moment, all you could do was stare, your hand covering your mouth as you tried to process everything. and then, in true fashion, you couldn’t help but joke through the overwhelming emotion.
“max, get up. you’re embarrassing me!” you said, laughing through your tears.
he laughed too, his cheeks flushing. “let me finish my speech, will you?”
you nodded, still grinning as he continued.
“i’ve been waiting for this moment for so long. you’re my everything. my partner, my best friend, my world. i don’t care if this is embarrassing because i’d embarrass myself a thousand times over if it meant i could call you mine forever.”
his words hit you right in the heart, and by the time he asked again, “so, will you marry me?” you could barely get the words out through your tears.
“yes,” you whispered, then louder, “yes! of course!”
the room erupted into cheers as max stood, slipping the ring onto your finger before pulling you into his arms. he kissed you, softly at first, then with all the love and relief he’d been holding back.
as your friends and family gathered around to congratulate you, max leaned close to whisper in your ear, “i told you i wasn’t being weird for no reason.”
you laughed, leaning your forehead against his. “you’re still a little weird, but i love you anyway.”
and from the way he smiled at you, you knew this was just the beginning of forever.
ʚ・lewis hamilton
“let me take you to italy early,” lewis said, his warm brown eyes fixed on you as he tried to convince you. “we can explore the city together before i have to make my debut with ferrari. just us.”
you hesitated, glancing out the window at the familiar, cozy gray skies of home. “but my home is here, baby,” you murmured, your voice soft. “here in the uk.”
lewis reached for your hand, lacing his fingers with yours. “i know,” he said, giving you that boyish smile that always made your heart melt. “but this’ll be different. just one week, before the madness starts again. come on, let me steal you away.”
you sighed, knowing full well that he’d already won you over. “alright,” you relented, a small smile tugging at your lips. “but only because it’s you.”
the trip was nothing short of magical.
lewis took you through the heart of italy, weaving through cobblestone streets and picturesque piazzas, his excitement contagious. he made you try every local delicacy, promising it was “for the full experience,” and insisted on taking candid photos of you when you weren’t looking.
midweek, he brought you to the ferrari factory. his face lit up as he showed you around, the glint in his eyes a mix of pride and anticipation. watching him interact with the team, you couldn’t help but feel a swell of admiration for him, knowing how much this new chapter meant to him.
and then came the last night.
lewis had insisted you get your nails done that morning, though he was unusually cryptic about why. “just trust me,” he said with a wink before leaving you to pamper yourself. when you got back to the hotel, you found a stunning dress laid out on the bed, a handwritten note from him resting on top.
“wear this tonight. no questions. xx lewis”
dressed and ready, you stepped into the car he’d arranged, and after a short drive, you arrived at the most breathtaking spot. the sun was setting, casting a golden glow over a lush hillside. string lights twinkled softly above a blanket spread out on the grass, surrounded by candles. a picnic was perfectly arranged, and standing in the middle of it all was lewis, holding your favorite flowers.
“you look stunning,” he said, his voice low and full of admiration as you approached. he kissed your cheek before leading you to sit.
the evening was perfect—good food, laughter, and stories shared as the world seemed to fade away around you. but as the night settled into a quiet calm, lewis stood and gently pulled you to your feet.
your brows furrowed as you looked at him, but before you could say anything, he was already lowering himself onto one knee.
“lewis…” you whispered, your hand flying to your mouth as he pulled a small box from his pocket.
“i’ve been thinking about how to say this for weeks,” he began, his voice steady but full of emotion. “you’ve been my rock, my partner, my everything. through all the highs and lows, you’ve been there, and i don’t know how i ever got this lucky.
“joining ferrari, starting this new chapter—it’s exciting, but none of it matters without you by my side. you make me better in every way, and all i want is to spend the rest of my life with you, sharing every moment, every adventure, every quiet night.”
tears welled in your eyes as he opened the box, revealing a stunning ring that caught the flicker of the candlelight.
“so,” he said, his smile soft and nervous all at once, “will you marry me?”
for a moment, all you could do was stare at him, overwhelmed with love and disbelief. finally, you managed to nod, a tear slipping down your cheek.
“yes,” you whispered, your voice breaking before you said it again, louder this time. “yes, lewis. of course.”
he slipped the ring onto your finger, standing to pull you into his arms as you laughed through your tears. “i love you,” he murmured, pressing a kiss to your forehead.
and as you looked out over the beautiful italian countryside, wrapped in his arms, you knew this was the start of something even more incredible than you could’ve ever imagined.
ʚ・george russell
“you know,” you said, laughing as you took another bite of your lunch, “my friends keep saying the craziest thing lately.”
george glanced up from his plate, his blue eyes twinkling with curiosity. “oh? what have they been saying?”
“they keep telling me you’re going to propose to me,” you said, laughing even harder at the thought. “isn’t that wild?”
the laughter caught in your throat when george, mid-bite, choked on his food. his eyes widened slightly as he reached for his water, and you watched him with a raised brow.
“are you okay?” you asked, stifling a laugh.
once he recovered, he looked at you, a little too intently. “i mean… if i were going to propose, would you be mad?”
you tilted your head, smiling softly. “of course not, my love. but you’ve been so busy lately. i know you wouldn’t be planning something like that right now.”
george nodded, his expression unreadable. “right… of course.”
but something in his tone made you pause.
over the next few days, the idea seemed to follow you everywhere. your friends weren’t letting up, either.
“why would he ask you to get your nails done?” one of them asked pointedly.
“and your hair,” another chimed in. “he’s definitely planning something.”
you shook your head, laughing off their theories, though you couldn’t deny the tiniest flicker of curiosity. still, george had been acting a little… shady. subtle, but shady. you chalked it up to his usual busy schedule, brushing off the idea of anything more.
at least, until a few days later.
the beach was stunning, a secluded stretch of soft sand meeting endless waves that shimmered under the setting sun. you’d been surprised when george suggested a quiet getaway, just the two of you. he said it was to relax before the season picked up again, but something about the way he kept fidgeting had your nerves on edge.
as you walked along the shore, the golden light casting an ethereal glow, george suddenly stopped.
“wait,” he said, reaching for your hand.
you turned to him, your brows furrowing slightly. “what’s up?”
he smiled, a nervous but endearing smile, and before you could ask again, he was down on one knee.
your heart stopped.
“george,” you breathed, your voice barely audible over the sound of the waves.
“alright,” he began, grinning up at you. “first off, i have to say, i cannot believe you didn’t catch on. you’re usually much more observant, love.”
your jaw dropped, half in shock and half in amusement. “you’re making fun of me now?”
he laughed, but his expression quickly softened. “i’m serious, though. i’ve been thinking about this moment for a long time. you’re my everything—my partner, my best friend, the person i want to spend every moment with. i love you more than i can put into words, and i can’t imagine life without you.”
tears welled in your eyes as he pulled out a small velvet box, revealing a sparkling ring.
“so,” he said, his voice steady and full of emotion, “will you marry me?”
for a moment, you just stared at him, overwhelmed by the weight of the moment. finally, you nodded, tears streaming down your face. “yes, george. of course, yes!”
he slipped the ring onto your finger before standing and wrapping you in his arms. you laughed, still in disbelief, as he pressed his lips to yours.
“i can’t believe you,” you said between laughs, your head resting against his chest. “you really planned all of this?”
“i did,” he said, smiling down at you. “and i’d do it a hundred times over just to see that look on your face.”
ʚ・carlos sainz
“hermosa, would you like to go out for dinner on friday?” carlos asked, his voice soft as you stood by the mirror, finishing up your nightly routine.
“dinner? on friday?” you repeated, slipping into bed beside him, a smile tugging at your lips. “i’d love to, amor.”
carlos leaned over, pressing a warm kiss to your forehead. “perfecto. the season starts soon, and i want to spend as much time as i can with you before it all gets busy again.”
you smiled, feeling your heart melt a little more—like it always did with him.
the days passed quickly, and soon friday arrived.
carlos, as always, had everything meticulously planned. he’d picked out your outfit—a stunning dress in your favorite color—and, true to his usual thoughtful self, made sure his suit coordinated perfectly. if you wore a red dress, carlos would find a way to incorporate red into his look, whether it was his tie, pocket square, or even the lining of his jacket. it was one of those little things that made him so uniquely him.
“you look breathtaking,” he said as he helped you into the car, his eyes filled with nothing but admiration.
“and you match,” you teased, running your hand along his lapel. “as always.”
he grinned, leaning in to kiss your cheek. “siempre,” he murmured.
dinner was perfect—an intimate table for two at a beautiful restaurant with warm candlelight and soft music in the background. carlos, ever the gentleman, kept his focus entirely on you, listening intently as you talked and making you laugh with his playful jokes.
but as the evening came to an end, something about his energy shifted. he seemed more nervous than usual, though he tried to play it off.
“let’s take a walk,” he suggested as you both stepped outside.
the air was cool, the streetlights casting a golden glow over the cobblestone street. you didn’t think much of it until carlos suddenly stopped in front of the restaurant, turning to face you.
“carlos?” you asked, confused as he reached for your hands.
his dark eyes met yours, filled with an emotion so raw it took your breath away. “hermosa,” he started, his voice a little unsteady. “there’s something i’ve been wanting to say for a long time now.”
before you could process what was happening, he was down on one knee, pulling a small velvet box from his pocket.
gasps and murmurs rose from the small crowd of onlookers nearby, but all you could focus on was him.
“i love you,” carlos said, his voice stronger now, filled with certainty. “i love everything about you—your laugh, your quirks, the way you care so deeply for the people around you. i love how you notice the little things, how you make every day feel special just by being in it. and i want to spend the rest of my life making you as happy as you make me.”
tears welled in your eyes as he opened the box, revealing a ring that sparkled even in the dim light.
“will you marry me?” he asked, his gaze never leaving yours.
for a moment, the world seemed to stand still. and then, with a tearful laugh, you nodded.
“yes, carlos,” you whispered, your voice shaky but sure. “of course, yes!”
cheers erupted around you as he slid the ring onto your finger and stood, pulling you into his arms. he kissed you deeply, his smile pressed against your lips.
“you had one choice,” he teased quietly, a playful glint in his eyes.
“and it was the right one,” you replied, grinning through your tears.
as he held you close, you couldn’t help but think about how every little detail he cared about, every thoughtful gesture, every look, and every word all came together to make this moment so perfectly, beautifully carlos.
ʚ・charles leclerc
“ma chérie, you look beautiful,” charles said with a soft smile as he grabbed your hand and spun you gently, making your dress twirl. he leaned in close, his lips brushing your ear before planting a playful kiss on your neck. “but you’d look better with it off,” he teased, his voice low and flirtatious.
your jaw dropped in mock offense as you lightly smacked his chest. “charles!” you laughed, shaking your head. “keep it in your pants, baby.”
he laughed, his green eyes sparkling with mischief as he pulled you into his arms. “are you ready to be on the yacht for the first time since we’ve been back in monaco?”
you nodded eagerly, your smile wide. “of course i am. there’s nothing better than being with you on the sea.”
charles smiled, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead. “je t’aime.”
“i love you too, amore,” you replied softly, leaning into him.
the two of you headed to the yacht, the sun casting a golden glow over the sparkling water. when you arrived, the crew greeted you warmly, and the yacht began to drift away from the dock, leaving monaco’s skyline behind.
charles took your hand, leading you up to the second level. as you stepped onto the deck, you gasped. a beautifully set candlelit table awaited, complete with a chilled bottle of wine and a server standing by. the soft glow of the candles reflected off the water, creating a magical ambiance.
“charles,” you breathed, looking around in awe. “what is this?”
he smiled, his gaze full of adoration. “i thought you deserved to be spoiled, ma chérie. it’s been too long since we’ve had time like this together.”
he pulled out your chair, helping you settle in before taking his own seat across from you.
“charles, this is really beautiful,” you said, your voice full of gratitude.
“anything for you, cherie,” he replied, his accent making the words sound even sweeter.
dinner was perfect, the two of you sharing laughs, stories, and heartfelt conversation. charles seemed especially thoughtful, his gaze lingering on you more than usual.
after the last course, he shifted in his chair, his demeanor becoming more serious yet still soft. “you know,” he began, his tone quieter, “being with you has been the best part of my life. i know i’ve been busy, and sometimes i’m not always there as much as i should be.”
you tilted your head, confused by the sudden shift in conversation. “charles, what’s going on?”
he stood up slowly, reaching into his pocket. your heart began to race as he pulled out a small velvet box, his fingers trembling slightly.
“mon amour,” he said, dropping to one knee in front of you.
your hand flew to your mouth as tears welled in your eyes.
“i’ve thought about this moment every day,” he continued, his voice steady but filled with emotion. “i love everything about you—your quirks, the little things you do when you think no one is watching, the way you make me feel like the luckiest man alive just by being by my side. i love your flaws, your strengths, all of it. it’s everything i’ve ever wanted in my life, forever.”
your tears spilled over as he opened the box, revealing a dazzling diamond ring that sparkled even in the candlelight.
“i want to spend the rest of my life with you, cherie. will you marry me?”
for a moment, you were too overwhelmed to speak, your emotions taking over. finally, you nodded, laughing through your tears. “yes, charles. yes, of course!”
the smile that broke across his face was brighter than the stars above as he slipped the ring onto your finger. he stood, pulling you into his arms and kissing you deeply, your tears mixing with his own.
“i love you,” he whispered, holding you close as the yacht gently swayed with the waves.
“i love you too,” you replied, your heart full to bursting.
and as you stood there together, the sea stretching endlessly around you, you knew you were exactly where you were meant to be—with charles, forever.
ʚ・lando norris
“lando, you’re being so distant. like, what is your issue?” you asked, crossing your arms as you sat in the passenger seat, watching him grip the wheel a little tighter than usual.
“it’s nothing, i promise,” he replied quickly, his eyes fixed on the road ahead.
but you couldn’t help the way your mind spiraled. “are you cheating on me?” you blurted out, your voice sharp and accusing.
lando slammed on the brakes, pulling the car over abruptly. he turned to you, his wide eyes filled with disbelief. “cheating on you? are you serious right now?”
“well, then why are you acting so weird!” you fired back, feeling frustration bubble over.
“i’m not cheating on you,” he said firmly. “and stop saying such irrational things before i crash the car!”
you huffed, crossing your arms tighter as he merged back onto the road. the tension hung thick in the air, but there was something about his tone that made you pause—he wasn’t just annoyed; he seemed… nervous.
after a few more silent minutes, the car pulled up to a secluded garden bathed in golden afternoon light. you frowned, glancing around.
“where are we?” you asked, the irritation in your voice softening as you took in the beauty of the place.
lando parked and stepped out, rushing around to open your door. he offered you his hand, and though you hesitated, you took it.
as you stepped into the garden, the feeling in your chest shifted. it was just the two of you—no other people, no distractions. the air was fragrant with blooming flowers, and butterflies flitted lazily in the sunlight.
your stomach fluttered as you glanced at lando, who was unusually quiet. he scratched the back of his neck, his signature nervous tell. that’s when it hit you—this wasn’t just a random outing.
“lando…” you started, your voice softer now.
but before you could finish, he turned to you, his cheeks flushed. “look, i know i’ve been acting weird,” he admitted, running a hand through his messy hair. “and i’m sorry. it’s just… i’ve been planning this for weeks, and i was so nervous i’d mess it up.”
you blinked, your heart pounding as he dropped to one knee, pulling a small box from his jacket pocket.
your hand flew to your mouth as your suspicions were confirmed, and a wave of emotions hit you all at once.
“i love you,” lando began, his voice steady but filled with emotion. “more than anything. you’ve been with me through everything—the ups, the downs, the crazy schedules, the late-night arguments about absolutely nothing.” he let out a nervous laugh, and you felt tears well up in your eyes.
“you’ve seen the best and the worst of me, and somehow, you still choose to love me. i don’t want to imagine my life without you in it. so, here i am, asking you to make it official.”
he opened the box, revealing a ring that sparkled brilliantly in the sunlight.
“will you marry me?” he asked, his voice soft, almost vulnerable.
you couldn’t stop the tears from spilling as you nodded. “yes, of course, yes!”
lando let out a breath he’d clearly been holding, slipping the ring onto your finger before standing and pulling you into a tight hug.
“i can’t believe you thought i was cheating on you,” he teased, his playful smirk returning as he kissed your temple.
“well, you were acting suspicious!” you shot back, laughing through your tears.
he chuckled, holding you close. “yeah, because i was scared out of my mind. do you know how hard it is to hide something this big from you? you’re nosy.”
you swatted at him lightly, grinning. “i’m observant.”
“sure you are,” he teased, leaning down to kiss you again.
and in that quiet, magical garden, with the sunlight casting a golden glow around you, everything felt absolutely perfect.
ʚ・oscar piastri
the great barrier reef had always been a dream of yours—a place you’d talked about endlessly. and, being the proud australian that he was, oscar had promised to take you the moment the season ended. true to his word, here you were, surrounded by vibrant coral and schools of colorful fish, the water shimmering like a painting brought to life.
oscar had gone all out, arranging a private guide and setting up everything to ensure the trip was perfect for just the two of you. it felt special, even more magical than you’d imagined.
after a long snorkeling session with the guide, you emerged from the water, still adjusting your snorkel mask as droplets streamed down your face. you caught sight of oscar standing on the sand, waiting for you.
but something was different.
your heart skipped a beat as you noticed him—barefoot, dressed in a loose white button-up and tailored shorts that made him look effortlessly handsome, his usual chill vibe intact. the sun cast a golden glow over the scene, and your breath caught when you realized he wasn’t just standing there.
he was on one knee.
your hands instinctively went to your snorkel mask as if to tear it off, realizing you were standing there in a dripping swimsuit, goggles pushed awkwardly onto your forehead, and hair probably a complete mess.
“wait… what are you doing?” you stammered, feeling your cheeks burn despite the cool ocean breeze.
oscar grinned, his calm demeanor never faltering. “what does it look like i’m doing?” he teased lightly. “just wait—don’t touch the mask. you look perfect.”
“perfect?” you let out a half-hysterical laugh, glancing down at yourself. “oscar, i look ridiculous!”
but he shook his head, his eyes soft and full of adoration. “no, you don’t. you look like you. authentic. beautiful.” he took a deep breath, his fingers curling tightly around a small box in his hand.
“being with you has made my life so much better,” he began, his voice steady but laced with emotion. “you’ve made even the craziest, busiest days feel worth it. and i knew this was where i wanted to do this because it’s so… us. a little chaotic, but amazing.”
tears stung your eyes as the reality of the moment hit you.
“i want to spend my life with you,” oscar continued, his usual calm exterior cracking just enough for you to see the emotion behind his words. “snorkel masks, messy hair, and all. so… will you marry me?”
you couldn’t help but laugh through your tears, nodding fervently. “yes! of course, yes!”
oscar slipped the ring onto your finger before standing and pulling you into his arms, the warmth of his embrace grounding you as you tried to process the whirlwind of emotions.
“you know,” you sniffled, “i can’t believe you proposed to me when i looked like this.”
oscar chuckled, brushing a strand of wet hair from your face. “i wanted it to be real. and let’s be honest, you’d never let me live it down if i’d done something boring or predictable.”
“well, you’re right about that,” you teased, your grin wide as you leaned in to kiss him.
“besides,” he added, his tone playful now, “even with a snorkel mask on, you’re still the most beautiful person i’ve ever seen.”
you rolled your eyes, laughing, but you couldn’t deny that this moment, messy and perfectly imperfect, was so perfectly you two.
2021-2025 © jungwnies | All rights reserved. Do not repost, plagiarize, or translate
#f1 fanfic#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#formula 1#f1 instagram au#fanfiction#carlos sainz x reader#f1 fic#max verstappen x reader#lando norris x reader#formula one#f1 smau#f1 fluff#carlos sainz fluff#crack texts#f1#max verstappen#lewis hamilton#carlos sainz#charles leclerc#lando norris#oscar piastri#george russell#charles leclerc x reader#oscar piastri x reader#max verstappen fluff#smau#𐐪♡︎₊˚ ― jungwnies#jungwnies
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It’s Always Been You
🍎F!reader, pet names: (pip/squeak, my girl, sweetheart,) suggestive but not smut, fluff, hurt/comfort, brief miscommunication and lots of groveling but it works out.🍎
Notes: I struggle with editing. This is totally separate from canon bc I’m heartbroken. It’s also my first lads fic, I’ll ALWAYS be a Sylus girlie but Caleb broke my brain for a minute 😭
Caleb joining the DAA wasn’t the problem at hand…No, it was the fact that you were going to be separated. Spending his last night before he leaves wrapped around each other like you always did when things were tough was the best comfort you could get.
“I’m gonna miss you so much, do you really have to go?” This was going to be the longest you’ve ever been apart since you were kids, and even worse, he wasn’t allowed to have his phone.
This wasn’t any easier on him but he couldn’t just back out. “I’ll be home before you know it, don’t worry too much.” Caleb brushed the hair from your eyes and held you closer, “plus, you get to have six months free of my constant nagging.”
That was absolutely the wrong thing to say, the tears you were holding back finally fell. Your hands that were originally wrapped around his waist were now at his chest, between your bodies and fisted tightly in his shirt. “But I love you and your nagging!” You inhaled like you were suffocating. Perhaps you were, under the weight of his impending absence.
“Shh I know, I love you and being a pain in your ass.” That earned him a wet chuckle. “I swear, as soon as I’m home I’ll fulfill my promise and I won’t leave your side. You’ll never have to worry again, about anything.” A soft kiss to your temple solidified his vow.
It took you a few long moments before you were able to get in a proper breath and process what he said. “You made a promise?”
“Don’t remember? Hm that won’t do. Think back to when you were 18, and that boy you had a crush on rejected you and broke your heart.”
“I’d prefer not to remember that, actually.”
“But remember after? When you still hadn’t come home by dinner and I found you alone at the park?” Large hands ran down the length of your back to help soothe you while he spoke.
You’re still lost but it’s coming back to you. Confessing to your crush in the park was supposed to be perfect— except he not only rejected you, but he made fun of you. You could respect rejection, but the way he humiliated you and made a scene wasn’t something you wanted to think about. “That day was awful.”
“You were so upset. I wanted to beat him to a pulp but you didn’t want to be alone. Remember what I told you? The pinky promise we made? It’s only been four years you know, I’d hope your memory isn’t that bad yet.”
The moment flooded you then with a gasp, ‘You’ll never be alone as long as I live sweetheart, and when it’s time, when I finally graduate and become a pilot, I swear I’ll marry you myself to prove it.’ And at the time it made you giggle, because surely he was just joking to cheer you up, right? “You meant it?”
Caleb chuckled and lifted your chin to look at you directly, “of course I did, it’s always been you and me. Don’t you know that?”
A fresh wave of tears formed as you surged forward to meet his lips with yours- and stopped out of embarrassment before you could make contact. “Sorry, I didn’t- I think I’m just being emotional—”
But the space between you closed once again and before you could overthink it, Caleb was kissing you the way he’s wanted to for years. His lips were all consuming and tender. His palm cupped your face like it was glass and you couldn’t resist running your fingers through his hair. Kissing Caleb felt like home, like everything was right.
He tried to break away to bring you both air but you refused to let him, instead pulling him closer and closer until he was on top of you, spreading your legs to accommodate his size. “Slow- slow down, you still need oxygen.” You shook when he started dragging his kisses down your throat, letting out soft moans when gentle sucks were left behind.
“C-Caleb…”
He pulled back and grew tense as if he was afraid he scared you away, “what’s wrong, you tired?” He was trying to give you an out if you wanted it.
You were certain your cheeks were flushed, you shook your head. “I want… more…”
Caleb groaned and buried his face in your neck “you’re killing me, Pip.”
Had you said something wrong? “Sorry- I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable… I’ll just-” you loosened your arms from around him, thinking you somehow embarrassed yourself yet again.
He stopped you. “You’re not going anywhere, sweetheart. You’re killing me because you have no idea how badly I want you; how long I’ve wanted you.”
“Really?” Having someone like Caleb love you was the best feeling, but him being attracted to you left you wanting him even more.
Deciding to just show you, he ground his hips into yours. And god, it felt good against you. Just that little bit of contact felt better than anything you ever achieved on your own. “You’re-” hard went unsaid. He grunted when you spread your legs wider for him. “Yeah, I am. And if you want me, then you have me. But you can’t take it back, so if you’re not ready for that commitment…”
“Can I tell you a secret?”
“This really isn’t the time for that—”
“Shut up, it’s important.” He sighed and let you continue. Your arms dropped from his neck to hold his face in your hands, brushing the stray hairs from his face. “That guy I had a crush on? I only liked him so much because he reminded me of you. So I’m yours, too. If you want me, then you can take me.”
Words were lost on him so actions took hold, “are you sure?” His kisses resumed their path after meeting your lips, the room grew hotter with each new brush against your skin.
“I trust you, Caleb,” you had no idea your neck was so sensitive, your gasps talking for you. “but I should let you know I’ve never done this before.”
“I’d kill anyone who ever touched you if you had”
“Isn’t that hypocritical? Should I hunt down your past lovers?” You worked his shirt over his head, the dog tag necklace you gave him mere hours ago dangled in front of your face.
He chuckled and discarded your top, your sleep shorts were next. “It’s funny how you think I’d ever want someone that isn’t you.” His revelation hit you full force: he loves you so deeply, there’s truly no doubt to have. “I’d never do this with anyone else.”
Two things happened that night: your bond was solidified, and unbeknownst to you, a life was created
The goodbye was brutal the next day, already missing him terribly before night fell again.
You managed to fall into a routine, though. You would go to work, occasionally spend time with friends— Tara spent the night with you at least once a week to keep your mind off of things; and the days she didn’t you laid in bed desperately wishing he would be by your side.
Your routine was solid, until a month into your separation when you were sick almost every single day. You were fed up by the time a week passed and the day after that you made your way to visit Zayne- who congratulated you because in his words, ‘he and his wife were expecting as well, perhaps they’ll be friends, too.’ Finding out you were pregnant without Caleb with you was difficult, there wasn’t a way to reach him and share the news.
But you weren’t alone anymore. You spent the time you felt lonely talking to your baby now, who definitely couldn’t hear you yet but that didn’t matter. You were kept company with a perfect blend of you and your Caleb.
According to the official statement released last week Caleb would be home any time today, any minute, any second.
The anticipation left butterflies in your tummy, your baby moving with your nerves. It didn’t occur to you that he might not be happy to be a father, that you might’ve been presumptuous that he’d be ready to care for another life so soon.
And when the door flew open, as much as you wanted to jump into his arms (carefully, of course,) you held your breath and waited for him to notice. And of course, because he was your Caleb, it was right away. His happiness and relief fell away to shock and— was that anger? You didn’t expect anger…
“Welcome home, I—”
“Who else has been here?”
“What? I mean Tara has been keeping me company a few times a week but that’s it.”
“What man has been in our home, pipsqueak.” He didn’t phrase it as a question, just a demand. He’s never been so terse with you…
His tone made you anxious, “No one, other than Zayne and his wife for dinner occasionally— Caleb what are you talking about?”
Caleb dropped his bag on the floor with a thud, still not moving from his spot. “I’m talking about the fact that I came home after six months and you didn’t seem to miss me at all, nothing like the way I missed you. How else would you be pregnant? So who is he? Someone from the Hunters Association?”
Oh… he thought… “Oh my god how could you think- I’d never cheat on you Caleb— EVER how could you even think—”
“Well, I certainly couldn’t have knocked you up in the time I’ve been away.”
A knife cut through you at his words, the accusation, the betrayal of thinking you’d ever be with anyone else. And how vulgar it was… Did your first time mean so little? Was it something he just wanted to get out of the way before he left? A sob escaped you, tears spilled over. “You’re an asshole, Caleb.”
His eyes went wide, “I’m the asshole here?”
“Yes! You’re a fucking asshole! I expected you to be shocked but accusing me of cheating on you? Thinking that night was nothing? That’s low. I can’t believe you!”
“That night means everything to me!”
“Ask me how far along I am! Go on, fucking ask!”
That stopped him short, “you mean?”
“SIX MONTHS!” Standing there while he dropped to his knees was barely satisfying. “God I can’t stand you right now! You must’ve lost your damn mind and all your common sense!”
His silence was angering you further, stomping off to the kitchen for a drink of water and trying to calm down was a better use of your time; crying from this much stress wasn’t good for you.
Once he gathered himself he followed you, “Sweetheart… you’re telling me that night…”
“Finally used your brain, did you?”
“I’m so, god I’m so sorry. I don’t know what came over me.” His hand reached out to bring you in for a hug but you denied him.
“Do. Not. Touch me.” His audacity made you seethe. No way were you going to give in so easily no matter how much you desired to be in his embrace and reassured.
“Sweetheart—”
“You’re sleeping on the couch. We can decide what to do later.”
His emotions began to overflow, the guilt crushing him; the ring in his pocket practically burning into his flesh. “Decide what?”
“Decide if I should even let you stay.” Your throat felt tight but you continued to hold your sobs back. “Your dinner is in the oven by the way, it’s your favorite so I suggest you don’t let it burn.”
A few hours rolled around before he couldn’t hold himself back anymore hearing your sniffles. You hadn’t eaten dinner, who knows if you had any water, and no matter how (rightfully) mad you were, you still needed to eat.
Grabbing a few of your favorite snacks with a glass of juice instead of the untouched dinner he put in the fridge was his safest option, unsure if seeing the meal would upset you further.
“Pip squeak? I know you’re awake.” Crouching by your side of the bed and setting the snacks on the nightstand, “please talk to me?”
“Go away.”
“You know I can’t do that, you have to eat something.”
You poked your head from the blanket, “oh so you care now that you know it’s yours?”
The jab was deserved but it still earned a wince. “I’d still care even if they weren’t.”
“How noble of you. Sticking around to raise a kid that’s not yours before I even have a ring.”
“Who said I didn’t have a ring?” This time you accepted the comfort of his hand brushing your hair behind your ear and gently cupping your cheek.
Curiosity was a bitch, but you weren’t ready to forgive him yet. “You were really mean.”
“I know, I’m so sorry, sweetheart. So sorry. I can’t imagine you being with anyone else but I didn’t expect to come home to a family either— and I’m beyond happy to be a dad. It’s not an excuse though, never okay to talk to you like that.”
A few leftover sniffles came before he pulled a tissue from the box on your nightstand, opting to dry your tears himself. “Blow,” He said, holding the tissue to help you blow your nose; then offering you the straw of the juice so you could hydrate.
“I missed you so much, I thought you’d still be happy to see me.”
“I’m over the moon, actually. But I hurt my girl, gotta make things right. Think you can forgive me? I’ll earn it forever.”
“Caleb if you ever, I mean ever, speak to me like that again I won’t hesitate to let you talk to the front door. You’ll be out.”
“I’ll cut my tongue out myself.”
“So dramatic as always.” You rolled your eyes, “you mentioned a ring?”
A smile lifted the corner of his mouth, “there’s my girl. You sure you still want it? Or should I earn it first?” He dug into his pants pocket to show you anyway.
“It wouldn’t hurt your efforts.”
He couldn’t help but chuckle fully before presenting the velvet box to you, “I’m pretty close to the ground but if you sit up for me I’ll get on one knee.”
Sitting up to stretch was good for your back anyway, “I think I’ve waited long enough.”
The velvet box opened and your jaw dropped, “picked it out in Skyhaven. Gideon and I helped the elderly owner of a small shop with some boxes he was struggling with in front of his door. Knew it was perfect right away, gorgeous and one of a kind like you.”
“You’re ridiculous, but I love it.” He slid it on your finger and sealed it with a kiss, and you fell into his arms like you’ve wanted to for the last six months.
Pulling away after many minutes of hugs, ‘I love you’s’ and kisses wasn’t welcomed by you. “Now, how ‘bout some dinner? I don’t think snacks are enough, they were backup. Gotta keep you healthy.”
“Did you like it?”
You were pulled to your feet and carried out of the room. “Didn’t eat without you, sweetheart. Having dinner without you and the baby felt empty.”
“Good. You can reheat it then.” You waited for the perfect moment to drop your bombshell, which happened to be when he was carrying a full glass pitcher of water for the table. “We’re having a daughter, by the way.”
The pitcher fell so fast his evol barely managed to catch it before glass hit the ground. It left you feeling smug.
You couldn’t help but cackle at his shocked spluttering, “A WHAT?”
I’m so flattered, I’ve never had so many people interested or had a taglist this long: @pixelcafe-network @kentochronicles @sashisuslover @lunia-likes-pomegranet @elli4ever @mysssticc @kaemaybae @kamisatoaiko @midiplier @jamseashell @llamabois @boba14 @crimsonspring @angrychinchillanoises @ali-shiii @kazbae95 @ifistoptherain @c-I-stinnett @nephelesthoughts @etherealzi @jjoppees @keithkoganeirl
All divider credits to me @thecutestgrotto
#caleb x reader#lads caleb x you#caleb x mc#lads caleb#love and deepspace caleb#caleb smut#caleb fluff#lads x reader#lnds caleb#lads mc#love and deepspace#love and deepspace fic
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Being Price’s lil wife
-Task force 141 knew Price was married. Man wore his ring religiously, always putting it back on the second they were in the helicopter/plane/whatever after each mission
-He’d come to work with a lunch packed with a cute lil heart note
-To be honest they all assumed you were the same age as Price (old) He always said he’d been “married for years” (3)
-They never knew your name, Price only ever referred to you as The Missus
-Gaz swore Price had a photo of you in his wallet (he did) but they never knew what you looked like untilllllllll
-You called your husband simply to complain. The AC had gone out and the repair man wouldn't be able to get there for a couple days. No no this simply would not do, his perfect lil lady could not be uncomfortable in her own home he wouldn’t have it but fuck he’s out of the country for a few more days. His team however is not and while stupid, they do know how to do maintenance work (why? Just because.)
-He called his team for a very important mission. Gave them the address, accompanied with “I don’t want to hear a fucking thing about you causing any trouble or being disrespectful to the Missus you hear?” The boys were absolutely giddy to finally see the ever so important Missus.
-The second you opened the door Soap was apologizing for having the wrong house and oh so politely asked if you knew where the Price household was. This had to be the wrong one because there you stood, pretty young thing, big doe eyes. Standing in just a big shirt ending at the very tops of your thighs, lashes batting at the three soldiers standing at your door.
-“You’ve got the right place. John told me you were coming, please come in.” You had to hold in a giggle, watching all of their eyes go wide. Gaz immediately looking at the sky, the floor, anywhere but the wife of his captain that he was just undressing with his eyes.
-When you turned to guide them into the house they all saw PRICE printed on the back of the large tshirt just barely covering your ass (this is your own home pants are never required and its hot as hell without the ac). Now it was Ghost’s turn to look anywhere but at you.
-As they worked you’d bring them water or snacks. They now understood why Price kept you hidden from them. The perfect lil housewife. The woman of all of their dreams already taken.
-When they were finished they went to the kitchen to inform you they were done only to find a full meal set on the table waiting for them but worst of all? There you were reaching up to the top cabinet. On your tippy toes, your shirt (Price’s shirt) riding up enough to expose the bottom of your ass and lacey pink panties. Soap had to bite his knuckle to keep from groaning. Ghost grabbing the tops of his teammates heads, turning them away from the incredible sight in front of them.
-Price was right to keep you hidden from them
-They might just have to sneak in and break something every time Price was out of town if it meant this is what they got to see.
#john price#captain price#price x reader#task force 141#tf 141#john soap mactavish#simon ghost riley#ghost#cod x reader#blurb#cod modern warfare#kyle gaz garrick#gaz
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lucky to have you
summary - you and harry raise a glass on an italian beach to celebrate his birthday
word count - >1k
pairing - harry styles x wife!reader
“To 31!”
You cheered your plastic cup, filled with beer, with Harry’s.
“And to many more.” Harry added, before you both swung back your beers.
Both of you were on the little beach you’d discovered in the years you had been coming back to Italy. It was a small beach, more like an alcove, but it felt like yours. No one had ever turned up when you’d visited and that’s what made it feel private.
You were sat cross legged on your beach towel and Harry was laid on his side, propped up by his arm, on his.
He looked a dream at 31.
You wrapped his cardigan around you a bit tighter as another breeze came across you both.
Harry put down his cup of beer and reached for another piece of cheese from the picnic.
It was only a small spread, but you’d wanted to create something fun and intimate to celebrate his birthday and a picnic was the perfect idea for it. There was cheese cubes, salami for you, a loaf of fresh bread and a selection of fruits for dessert.
Harry popped the slice of cheese in his mouth and you watched him whilst drinking more of your beer.
“What?” He asked whilst chewing.
“Ew. Eat with your mouth closed.” You giggled.
Harry rolled his eyes but he did have better manners than that, so he waited until he was finished before asking again.
“What are you looking at?”
“You.” You smiled.
“Me?”
You laughed at his ignorance. He really had no clue how good he looked it was infuriating. It was often a losing battle when you were out because everyone looked at him. Yet, he only ever looked at you.
You nodded with a dazed smile.
“You’re too handsome.”
Harry chuckled, tilting his head down to hide his blush. Even after all these years you could still cause him to flush over a silly comment.
“You’re so annoying.” He chuckled.
“Why?”
“You always know what to say to make me blush. Makes me feel like a high school teenager with a crush all over again.” He admitted, looking back at you so you could see the sincerity in his eyes.
“You know? My high school crush ditched me on valentine’s day.”
“What?”
“Yeah. Supposedly was going to meet him at this local cafe for a coffee and then we were going to watch a movie, but he ditched last minute. He said something had come up.” You shook your head.
Harry tutted, glad that guys like that didn’t get to mistreat you anymore. He would never even question doing something like that to you.
He loved you too much.
“Well I don’t plan on ditching you this valentine’s day.”
“And that’s why I married you.” You made a pleased noise to yourself.
You had definitely married the right guy. There was no question about that. It wasn’t even a case of Harry being perfect, because he wasn’t always, but it’s just that he was perfect for you.
The way your similarities, dislikes and general personalities mesh together was just perfect. That’s why there was constantly so much love and affection between you too. There was so much of you within each other and it felt so natural to be together as a result of that.
“What should we do this year?” You asked, wiggling your toes into the sand.
“For valentines day?”
“Mhm.”
“What do you want to do? I’ll take you anywhere but that horrible restaurant we went to last year.” Harry laughed, taking a sip of his beer.
“Please. Never again.” You chuckled with him.
Both of you went quiet as you thought through various options.
“What if we stayed here?” You asked, bringing your knees up to your chest so you could rest a cheek on one of them. You looked at him hopefully.
“Exactly here? Or somewhere else in Italy?” Harry asked as he sat up.
“Right here. I like it here.”
“I know you do.” He smiled.
He knew you were thinking back to when he proposed to you right here on this very beach - hence why you had such a strong attachment to it. That’s why you pretended it was your private beach.
“So… Can we?”
“‘Course.” He nodded. “C’mere.”
You didn’t need to be told twice before you raced to sit on top of him straddling his waist as both of you sat up straight.
Harry’s hands tucked neatly around your back and held you tight against him, whilst yours winded up around his neck and messed with the growing hair there.
“Love you.” You whispered.
“Love you too.” He smiled a little, small, smile. One that you craved too much to leave alone which is why you leant in to kiss him.
His lips were soft from the warm weather. You pressed yourself into him as he took control of the kiss, leaning forwards when he leant back a bit. Neither of you minded how messy and awkward the kiss was, it was nice to just be like this in the open.
You tugged on his hair as he bit your lip, making you gasp and rock your body forwards slightly. His hands gripped your hips to keep you steady.
Harry broke away from you first, kissing you a couple times extra before moving his head a distance away from yours.
You pouted as he left you.
“Don’t give me that.” He chuckled at your pout, eyes not being able to choose between looking at your lips or eyes.
“But…”
“It’s my birthday.” He argued.
You rolled your eyes with a smile, feeling ridiculously lucky to be loved by him.
#harry styles#harry styles x reader#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles x y/n#harry styles fanfic#ask finelinevogue#harry blurb#finelinevogue#harry styles concept#harry oneshot#harry styles blurbs#harry styles birthday fic
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Hush
Fem!Reader x Hwang In-Ho
Warnings: MDNI18+, Oral (F receiving), Fingering, Pussy Eating, Overstimulation, SoftDom! In-Ho, Secretive In-Ho, Mentions of Gunshot wound, Light Alcohol consumption, No usage of Y/N (but readers getting called as "Sweetheart" and "Darling"), Not proofread, Let me know if I missed anything! 🖤
Word Count: 1,686
Author's Note: I was so sleepy and I zoned out with this idea, I had the urge to write it because I'm afraid if I sleep it'll be gone by the time I wake up, so I apologize if there's spelling and grammar mistakes!
© Pictures are from: I come by the rain (2009)
You've been married to In-Ho for 3 years. You've known him since you were kids, he's a dominant man but he would worship the ground you walk on, give you expensive things, treat you romantically without you noticing it. That's probably the main reason why you married him.
For over 3 years of marriage, you still don't know what's his work, he always tell you that he's just going out for a ‘business trip’ that he'll be gone for 7 days, you begged for him to tell you what's his work about—but he's just changing the subject quickly, avoiding the question about his work. You let it pass every time though, maybe it's something that you don't need to know, something that it's private—but you're worried, what if something bad happens to him during that ‘business trip'? Though, when he's away he always call you and send you messages when he can, one time you told him you missed him and you need him that you cried on the phone while begging for him to come home, In-Ho's heart ache at the sound on your voice breaking through the line on the phone, sometimes he hates himself from not telling you the truth about what he do, on who he really is…but for the sake of your safety—he choose not to.
He went straight home and cuddled up with you on your shared bed, whispering sweet nothings to your ear as you lay your head on his chest, his breathing calms you down—the way his chest would slowly rise up and down, matching the pace of your breathing, you relaxed at the soft hum of his voice as he tells you that he's sorry for leaving you for almost 3 days, that he'll take you out tomorrow to go and shopping and eat at one of your favorite restaurants in Italy.
But sometimes, you just can't help but ask In-Ho about it, even though you know he'll avoid the question, you wanted to know the truth.
“Sweetheart, I wish I could tell you in detail, but even if I did…you won't understand.” He said, sitting on the leather sofa, a whiskey in his left hand while looking up at you, “It's just…I'm worried,” you sat down beside him, “Last time you went home…you had a wound on your shoulder,” In-Ho clenched his jaw tightly, recalling the incident between him and his brother Jun-Ho, he sighed softly, eyeing you, “I know sweetheart, but I promise I'm ok, nothing to worry about.” he sets down the glass of whiskey on the coffee table as He assured you, he gave you a kiss on top of your forehead, You smiled up at him, “I love you, In-Ho.” You said kissing him, the kiss was gentle and delicate, you liked it when he kiss you like this—taking his time with you, making you take control of him if you want to, his hands travelled up to your waist as he picks you up to sit on his lap, he pulls away slowly, “I love you too, Sweetheart.” He said as he trails down kisses on your jaw all the way down to your neck, you whimper, “In-Ho…” you start to feel a familiar sensation between your thighs, “I know, sweetheart…let me take care of you, hmm?” you nodded eagerly, In-Ho chuckled at your response. He hooked his finger on the strap of your shirt, pulling it down slowly revealing your bare chest to him, “You look so beautiful like this, sweetheart,” he said as he plants kisses on your chest, sucking the exposed skin—leaving reddish marks on it, you whined, “In-Ho…please–” you begged as you looked down on him, still sucking your skin, he looked up, dark brown eyes turned up at you, he trails his warm tongue on your nipple, you moaned as he started sucking it gently. In-Ho can feel himself getting hard, he wants to fuck you right here, right now, but he wants to push you first, to make you feel good.
He released his mouth on your nipple with a loud pop, his saliva glistened on your nipple, “Tell me what you want sweetheart.” He said gripping your neck lightly, not too much to hurt you, “Please.. In-Ho,” you begged, tears started to prickle on the corner of your eye, “Please what, sweetheart?” He said reaching through your cheek to wipe your eyes using his thumb, “Fuck me, please, In-Ho…” you once again begged as In-Ho chuckled, “Want me to fuck you, huh, sweetheart?” He said cupping your chin to look down at him, you didn't say anything and just gave him a whinny look, “Need your words sweetheart,” he said giving you a smirk, “Want you to fuck me, Please In-Ho…” “As you wish, sweetheart.” He said as he lays you down softly on the sofa, he motioned you to lift your hips as he pulls down your shorts, revealing you in your undies, he leans down and trails kisses on your thighs, licking your skin, you whimper as In-Ho chuckled, the vibration of his chuckle sends shivers down on your spine, “Please…” you cried out, “Patience is a virtue, Darling.” He whispered on your skin, his breath feels hot on your skin, you want him to touch you, to fuck you to put you on your place, He hooked his index fingers on the waist band of your undies—exposing your bare cunt Infront of his face, “So wet for me, Sweetheart.” He said as he traced his middle finger on the slit of your pussy—earning a whimper from you, He leaner in as you felt his warm breath on your aching cunt, “In-Ho…please–want you,” your hips jerked up as he looks at you, he glared at you, your breath hitched as he stick his tongue out slightly licking your clit, teasing you as he smirk, “Mmm–” you mumbled, lips pressed together, “Wanna hear your voice, sweetheart, let me hear them.” He said in between kisses on your pussy, You moaned, When In-Ho heard your pornographic moans he eats your pussy like a starved man—slurping every juices that your pussy could offer him, sucking the bundle of nerves, biting the soft skin as your eyes rolled back from the back of your head, you arch your back—gripping your hands on the leather couch as you moaned his name like a broken record, He continues to eat you while looking at you, he reached for your hand that's grabbing the leather couch, softly putting it on his hair, your grabbed his hair tightly—pushing him down on your cunt—you want more, you want more of him, He flicks his tongue faster as he slides his index finger inside your pussy, “Fuck–In-Ho!” You moaned as he curled his fingers inside you, he smirked at the sound of you, priding himself that he could make a mess out of you by just doing this, making you beg for more till you break—of course he will keep giving you more till you can't cum anymore, he'll make you writhe against his touch, make you feel sore, he'll make you unable to walk for days as he pride himself for eating you out and making you cum and squirt all over his face. You started to feel a familiar sensation in your stomach as In-Ho continuously flicked his tongue on your aching clit, you're so gonna be sore for days you'll be staying in bed and call In-Ho for help to stand up, he hasn't fucked you yet and you feel worned out, what more if he rammed his thick cock inside your pussy? He'll rip you apart, not that you don't mind though, you're going to take it like a good girl. His good girl.
“In-Ho…” you cried out, In-Ho felt your pussy clenched around his index finger, he knows you're about to cum and he'll give it to you no matter what. “I know sweetheart, cum for me, Be a good girl and cum on my face,” he said in between a flick of his tongue as his husky voice sent shivers down your spine “ruin my face with your sweet juices, squirt on my face like a damn fountain.”
his voice soft but demanding, you whimpered at his words as you felt him go crazy on your clit, he added a second finger inside you, making you feel full of him already, he pumped his thick fingers inside and out of you, shoving it harshly—hitting every spot inside of you as you shivered and moan his name, “In-Ho!” Is the last thing you screamed as you squirt your juices on In-Ho's face, he hurriedly opened his mouth and slurped everything he could get, not wasting a drop as he repeatedly fuck's you with his tongue, you felt so overstimulated, it's all too much, but you need In-Ho inside of you, you want him badly.
“Stop–I can't! Too much!” you breathe out, “Want you.. inside ah!” You heard him chuckled darkly, “Sweetheart,” he said as he brought up his face a little, his chin and cheeks glistened with your juices, he licked his lips before opening his mouth to talk to you, “Let me make it up to you for those days that I'm gone.” He said as he sat up, unbuckling his belt—not breaking an eye contact with you, you moaned at the sight of him; it always excite you when he does this, it's simple yet so fucking hot and sexy, “I'll make sure you'll forget to ask that damn question,” he said as he threw his pants on the floor revealing his cock, he lined it up on your entrance, gathering some of your juices to use it as a lube for his cock, pre-cum beaded on his tip as he slapped the tip of his cock on your now swollen clit, “The only thing you'll remember is this moment, while I fuck you senselessly with my cock, I'll pump you full with my cum that you'll be leaking for days that I'm gone, You'll only remember how I fuck this pretty cunt of yours.”
Author's Note: I hope you like this one, Its longer than what i've imagined. Anyways, Let me know if you want a part 2 of this one, Thank you for the support!
< Squid Game Masterlist I Main MasterList >
#lee byung hun#squid game#hwang in ho#player 001#the front man#oh young il#squid game netflix#001#hwang inho#hwang in ho x reader#inho x you#inho x reader#in ho x reader#in ho#001 x you#001 x reader#player 001 x reader#frontman x you#frontman x reader#lee byung hun x reader#Hwang inho smut#Lee Byung Hun smut#Oh young il smut#Frontman smut#frontman smut#squid game smut#001 squid game#frontman#front man x reader#the frontman
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Could you do a Dae ho fic? Maybe the reader being stuck with thanos' group and isn't treated with much respect (either treated as weak or just eye candy) but dae ho comes in and helps her + shows her care and respect. Thank you <3
Safe with me
Dae-ho x Reader
Summary: As above.
A/N: I want to marry this man right NOW. I'm begging on my knees.
☆☆☆
You had never felt like you belonged anywhere. You had barely any friends and for the few friends you did have, you were only the spare friend.
You knew that you were beautiful. Guys had been flirting with you dozens of times but you knew they only wanted to get into your pants. They only cared about your looks and wouldn't care to get to know you for who you really were. You had gotten used to the fact that nobody truly wanted you, they only wanted to use you for a while and then toss aside.
It was all the same now here, in this game. You always had a hard time to approach new people, complete strangers to you, and waited for someone to speak to you, to take you in. Nobody did on the first day.
When the second game started, the players needed to form a group of five. You were starting to panic. Most of the players already had atleast one partner who they could start finding more players with.
You had nobody. What if you were left alone when everyone had formed their groups and you'd end up in the weakest one who nobody else wanted to have either?
"Señorita, excuse me," a man said behind you, startling you from your thoughts. "Want to join our group?"
Your heart started hammering harder against your chest, a new sprinkle of hope rising. You weren't chosen the last this time after all.
The man speaking had purple hair and was supposedly the 'famous rapper' Thanos who many players had been thirsting over before the first game. Personally, you didn't get the hype. The man next to him was player 124, you didn't know his name, but you could see him looking at you from head to toe, hunger in his eyes and a smirk spreading on his lips.
"Yeah, you'd make a great addition to our team," player 124 said and winked, creeping you out instantly.
What choice did you have anyway? If the game was about strength, atleast you wouldn't have to worry about it as much because you had men in your group.
"Sure, i'll join you," you agreed and followed them.
Before the game started, all the players' legs were linked to each other with chains and you were squeezed between Thanos and player 124, who had introduced himself as Nam-gyu. You felt uncomfortable having both men around you, especially having their arms around your waist. You could tell that it was all intentional and they could have easily kept their hands higher and not so low.
When it was your turn to play, you were so nervous that you failed your attempt three times and was becoming frustrated and soon panicking, the time seemed to be running down faster the more times you failed.
"Focus, sweetheart," Thanos breathed right into your ear. "You can do it."
"Don't you dare to make us die today," Nam-gyu spat which was the complete opposite of helpful. Thanos gave him a look to shut it and let you concentrate but you didn't notice it.
Finally, you succeeded and your group eventually ended up passing the challenge and was let to live for one more day.
☆☆☆
It was time to vote and you gathered into the crowd to wait for your turn like everyone else.
"And you're going to press 'O' now, right?" Nam-Gyu asked. "Because if you don't, there will be consequences."
You were relieved when it was his turn to vote. He left you alone with Thanos, he wasn't much better option, but atleast now there was only one of them eyeing you down. There was still many players before it would be your turn. You took a deep breath in and tried to calm your nerves down.
"Relax," Thanos said and put his arm around your waist, pulling you tightly against him. Almost too tightly. "As long as you keep your blue patch," he pressed the patch with his tattooed finger, a little too deep into your breast, "you have nothing to worry about. Okay, señorita?"
"Yeah, of course," you mumbled and tried to avoid eye contact with him, but he put his free hand on your cheek, making you to look at him in the eyes.
"You're not gonna betray us, you hear me?" Thanos said with a low and threatening voice.
"I'll press 'O'," you promised, trying to sound convincing.
"Good girl," Thanos said and smiled. He turned away from you to look at the scores, the blue was winning but the red wasn't far behind, but didn't let go of you, his hand still gripping your waist a little too low.
When his number was announced, he immediately rushed to the front and didn't hesitate even a second to press the blue button.
"You okay?" a man next to you asked. You turned your head to look at him and saw his concerned look. You had no idea if he had stood there the entire time or just appeared there a second ago.
"Yeah, i'm fine," you mumbled but you knew you didn't sound very convincing.
"I'm going to press 'X'," he admitted.
You furrowed your brows, looking at the blue 'O' on his jacket. "You're going to change your vote?"
"Yep, i'm done with this place and i'd rather go home, no matter how much money i would be able to earn here if i stayed," he explained. "It's not worth putting everyone else's lives in danger."
A small smile found its way on your face but it was gone too soon that he would have noticed.
"If you change your vote too, you're welcome to join my team over there," he said and smiled. "I've seen you with those guys and i don't like them, not one bit."
You did want to get out of there as soon as possible, but Nam-gyu's threats were still lingering hot in your ear.
"I'll think about it," you said quietly.
He would welcome you to his group? You had seen him with a few guys, all older than him, and one small girl who seemed to be pregnant, atleast by the looks of it. Oh, how much you wished to have another girl by your side.
Player 390.
It was now your turn and you walk to the front to stand in front of the two large buttons. In your mind, instead of red X and blue O, you saw two faces instead - player 388 and player 124.
You took a deep, shaky breath in, and pressed the red button. The pink guard offered you a red 'X' patch to attach on your jacket to replace the blue one.
You walked to the red side where all the other people wanting to go home were. You glanced at Thanos and Nam-gyu who were looking at you with a cold stare. You wouldn't feel safe tonight if you wanted to fall asleep. You wouldn't doubt a moment that they wouldn't do anything to you in your sleep.
You found the same guy who had talked with you just a moment before, trusting him to take you in with open arms. He smiled and put his hand on your shoulder, leading you to his friends, the ones who had already voted.
"My name is Dae-ho," the man introduced himself.
"I'm Gi-hun and this is Young-il," an older guy said. You had heard of him being here for the second time and how he had won all his games a few years ago. It was possible to eventually get back home.
"Hi, i'm Y/N," you said. "Thank you for letting me join you."
"Of course," Gi-hun said and smiled.
That night, you weren't able to sleep and only feared that one of your former group members were going to come after you because you had voted to leave and changed sides, even though the 'O' was a clear winner and would have won anyway, no matter which color you pressed. Now there was no going back to them even if you wanted to – and you didn't.
You sat up and hugged your legs, bringing them close to you and tried to comfort yourself when there was nobody else to do that.
"Not able to sleep, hm?" a whisper came behind you and someone tapped your shoulder to get your attention. You hadn't heard anyone approaching your bed and was terrified to turn around and look at this person. You knew it was Nam-gyu.
"Not really," you said, trying to keep your cool and not seem weak.
"You did a big mistake for voting 'X'. I told you there would be consequences."
He grabbed your face with his hand, pressing on your cheeks so hard it started to hurt.
"Oi, leave her alone," another voice came nearby.
"Or what?" Nam-gyu scoffed. "You'll fight me over this bitch?"
"If i have to, i will," Dae-ho challenged Nam-gyu and stood now right in front of him. Nam-gyu had let go off you. "I'd prefer we'd do it elsewhere though, i wouldn't want to wake up all the people here and have guards shoot us both."
Nam-gyu narrowed his eyes and looked for any signs of bluffing on Dae-ho's face, not finding any. He only stood there like a stone statue, the expression on his face not faltering for even a second.
"Whatever, keep that bitch for yourself. She's not worth it," Nam-gyu mumbled and left, intentionally pushing Dae-ho's shoulder with his when he walked by.
Dae-ho ignored it with a mere roll of his eyes until he looked at you.
"You okay?" he said and cupped your face with his hand, brushing your cheek with his finger on the spot where Nam-gyu's fingers had just been, but Dae-ho's touch felt like a feather.
You only nodded your head.
"Good. You don't have to worry about them anymore, you deserve to be respected and treated like a woman is supposed to be treated," Dae-ho said and his words made your stomach to be filled with butterflies.
Men had never treated you very well, you were used to getting treated poorly, and now having someone show you some respect felt strange. Almost too good to be true. You would have thought you were dreaming if it weren't for his touch on your cheek.
"Try to get some sleep," he said and was about to get up, until he sat down again. "Do you want me to stay?"
You raised your eyebrows, not expecting to hear that. Did he want to have a go with you after all? Now?
"I mean, i can sleep on the floor," he hurried to say. "If it would make you feel safer and sleep better. I don't mind to take the floor."
"Would you really do that for me?"
"Of course. I'll go grab my pillow, be back in a second."
☆☆☆
You slept well all the way to the morning when they woke you up to a new day. You would have gladly slept an hour or two more but you forced yourself to get up. You looked over your bed and saw Dae-ho hugging his pillow on the floor, opening his eyes.
How much sleep did he really get? You felt bad for him but you were thankful that he stayed with you.
"Good morning," Dae-ho said with a tired smile.
"Morning," you replied with a yawn.
"Did you sleep well?" he asked.
"I did, yes," you answered. "Thank you, Dae-ho. I hope it wasn't too uncomfortable for you."
"Oh, it's all fine," he said, standing up, stretching his back and legs a little bit. "I've slept in worse places. Now, let's start to get ready for the next game."
☆☆☆
During the Mingle game, you were felt much safer with Dae-ho to protect you than what you would have felt with Nam-gyu. You were sure that if they had to kick someone out, it would have definitely been you.
Dae-ho made sure to hold your hand every round so you wouldn't accidentally get lost and separated from him, seeing how brutally people were pulling and pushing each other to get into rooms first with enough people.
When it came down to two people, Dae-ho immediately ran with you to a free room and when you were inside, he leaned on the door so nobody would come there and kick you out and claim the room for themselves.
When the time ran out and the door was locked, Dae-ho fell down to sit on the floor, his back sliding agains the door until he hit the ground. He was panting loudly, as were you too.
"Tell me that was the last round," you breathed loudly and leaned your head on the wall.
"It must be," he wished.
"I hope the rest of our group found a partner too," you said, worried that some of them were left alone and were shot.
"I'm sure they're fine," Dae-ho said and came to sit next to you, putting his arm around your shoulder and pulling you closer to him.
"What if they didn't find a room? There wasn't room for everyone," you pointed out.
"We'll see them alive on the other side, okay?" Dae-ho assured you, his hand on your cheek, making you to look at him. You hesitantly nodded, taking his word for it. "Right now, let's just be relieved that we found a room too."
"I know, i know," you said and leaned your head on Dae-ho's shoulder, not even thinking about how the act made Dae-ho's heart skip a beat. You just found his presence around you comforting and how safe you felt with him.
"You know, i saw you before the second game started and we were supposed to form groups," he said. "We needed to find more person into ours and i saw you standing in the middle of the room alone."
You furrowed your eyebrows, pulling your head back now to look at him.
"I was about to walk towards you, but those other guys managed to get to you first," he explained.
"Oh," you let out a breath. Dae-ho was quiet for a moment and you didn't know what to say to that.
"I'm sorry i didn't get to you sooner," he apologized. "I hated to see how they treated you."
"It's okay, i'm used to it," you mumbled and gave him a sad smile. He furrowed his eyebrows and lifted your chin with his fingers. His heart broke for your words.
"Listen. No woman should be used to that," Dae-ho said seriously. "Don't ever let a guy treat you like that, okay?"
You looked at him for a moment until nodded, a little unconvinced but the look in his eyes was so sincere it made you feel much calmer than before.
"Thank you, Dae-ho," you said with a shy smile. "You're a really great man."
Then, the doors were unlocked and you were allowed to leave.
Walking out and scanning the area to see who had survived the game, you let out a breath of relief, seeing Gi-hun and the rest of them safe.
You had all survived through one more game.
☆☆☆
"You know, i think Dae-ho really likes you," Jun-hee said to you quietly when you were in the bathroom.
"Oh, he's just being nice to me," you chuckled nervously and turned off the faucet, starting to dry your hands with paper towels.
"Nice?" she chuckled. "If we get out of here alive, he's definitely going to ask you for a date. He looks at you like a lost puppy."
You felt your cheeks warming up and tried to fight the smile appearing on your lips.
"For real?" you asked and felt butterflies in your stomach.
"For real."
☆☆☆
You were sitting with Jun-Hee and chatting together, laughing about something she said to you. You covered your mouth with your hand. Dae-ho wished you would have kept your hand on your lap, so he would have seen your beautiful smile.
He would have wanted to ask you if you'd go out with him when this would all be over, but he was afraid he was moving too fast and scare you away. You had seemed to be uncomfortable around men, even though you had relaxed in his arms during the Mingle game, when it was just the two of us, and let him hold your hand the entire time you were standing on the carousel.
He missed your touch and wanted to take you into his arms again, but he had to respect your space and get closer to you when you seemed comfortable enough around him.
You having fun and looking happy made Dae-ho smile. Suddenly, you looked towards him, and Dae-ho hadn't even realized that he had kept staring at you for such a long time. He quickly turned his head away to look at Gi-hun, who wasn't sitting far from him, starting a short conversation to seem busy.
"Hello," you said, startling Dae-ho. You walked so quietly that he hadn't heard you arriving near him. You sat right next to him.
"Hello," he greeted.
"We'll have to go sleep again soon," you said. Dae-ho hadn't even realised there was only 10 minutes until the lights were going down.
"Oh, it's that late huh," Dae-ho said.
"I don't want to be weird, but..."
"Yes?" he encouraged, when you didn't finish your sentence. You bit your lip, and Dae-ho saw your cheeks turn slightly red.
"Would you mind to sleep with me again tonight?" you asked nervously. "I get it if you don't want to, it's okay but i just-"
"Yes, of course," Dae-ho interrupted you. "I mean, if you want to and feel safer, i'd be happy to." Dae-ho's heart was beating faster and a smile spread on his face. "I'll just grab my pillow and-"
"No," you said and grabbed his wrist, looking at him in the eyes. "I meant, in the bed with me."
Dae-ho's eyes widened.
"Oh," he quietly gasped. "Sure, yeah."
You could see his cheeks turn red and a smile on his lips.
You went towards your bed and both of you laid on it, your head resting on his chest.
"Your heart is beating very fast," you pointed out and turned your head upwards to look at him. "Am i making you uncomfortable?"
"It's the opposite of uncomfortable," he reassured you and brushed his fingers through your hair.
Right then, the lights went out and you were fully clinging on Dae-ho's body, your left leg over his.
"Goodnight, Y/N."
"Goodnight, Dae-ho
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Could you please give headcanons on how LAD men would react if MC is non-jealous? Like they got hit on but MC isn't bothered or phased just stand there n watch the whole thing unfold (you can say Mc is amused at the attempt or smug about it cuz it shows that she had good taste in men) sry if my english is bad
im assuming that this is what youre referring too so ive put them both into one request lol
Zayne doesn't really mind it. He likes that you aren't jealous because he wants to be with someone who's secure in his relationship considering how late his hours are and how he can't be around as often as he would like to be. Knowing that you're more than fine with him focusing on work those days where he really has to focus and can't see you.
He doesn't get hit on too often because of the slightly chilly demeanor he has. People tend to leave him alone, especially with how obvious he makes it that you're dating him by the way he holds you. However, whenever people do try it he's glad that you don't mind it. He doesn't want you to think that he has eyes for anybody but you, even if a very very small part of him his curious to see what your protective side might be like when it comes to him.
When someone starts to insult you is when he starts shutting things down. He's telling them to stop saying things like that because there's no way he'd fall for their weak attempts at manipulation and will honestly start trying to walk away. If you stop minding your own business and start paying attention to him he'll try to guide you away to prevent you from hearing something nasty being said about you.
You gently shush him, smiling to yourself as you listen to the person rant at you. You know that Zayne doesn't want you to draw attention to the two of you so you let them complain before asking them if they think behaving like a child is really how you find a man that's as accomplished and sophisticated as Zayne. You don't really need to say much anyway because they can see how Zayne looks at them with a mild irritation for how they've interrupted your day before simply bidding them a goodbye. They're stuck trying to figure out how to reply to your words, forced to confront their childish actions.
If they decide to continue, following you around and shouting obscenities at you then you simply tell them that they look pathetic begging for him like this and that everybody around you is laughing at them. Public shame is a strong deterrent and they're forced to leave you alone. Zayne doesn't say anything but he does press a soft kiss to your cheek, not wanting to be too affectionate in public with how many eyes are on you but he's also very proud of how you can easily stand your ground.
Xavier likes knowing that he's yours but he also doesn't care too much for giant overt displays. He likes the subtle ways you show your his and he can show others that he's yours. It shows in the subtle way the two of you speak of how intertwined your lives are, just how casual the two of you are with each other. There's this implicit understanding that's shared between the two of you that just makes it seem like you two have been married for thirty years.
He doesn't mind that you aren't jealous over him but he also sometimes wants to see you being possessive over him. He likes seeing how your eyes flash and how you slide yourself next to him. You'll kiss his cheek and smile at him before asking who his new friend is. He typically doesn't entertain conversations with people who aren't you but he's much more subtle about it. People don't notice that he's not checked into the conversation until they suddenly realise he's quiet not because he's listening, but because he's fully just on his phone or started to leave when they looked away from him.
He doesn't get hit on often but when he does it's because people see him as an easy target. They think that he's chill and would be receptive to getting their number when it's totally the opposite. He doesn't even look at people who try to flirt with him, immediately pulling out his phone to text you to come find him faster because people are trying to get his number.
You show up quickly as soon as you hear them telling him how clearly, you don't care about him if you've just abandoned him like that. They're claiming that if you really loved him as much as he says he does then you wouldn't have left him alone like that. They start going on and on as you approach, tapping their shoulder as you gently push them aside to perch yourself on Xavier's lap. He doesn't expect it but he welcomes in anyway, happily returning the soft kiss you give him.
You totally ignore the person flirting with him, rolling your eyes as you tell them that Xavier hates it when people just prattle on and on about nothing like the way they're doing right now. You don't even let them get another word in as you tell him that you're tired and wanna go home now - your day was ruined by them and you didn't feel like staying out anymore.
He likes how you basically just totally shut them down without a second though, standing up with him and taking his hand. The two of you just fully ignore them, heading home as Xavier tells you he likes it when you do things like that.
Rafayel loves being obvious about how much he loves you. He's constantly hit on at parties and generally when he's in an okay mood he won't be as openly hostile about rejecting advances if Thomas begs him not to. He feels bad for the guy sometimes, knowing how difficult he can be to work with but not bad enough to actually be fully nice to everyone at events.
He wishes you were more openly jealous around him, recounting some stories specifically in hopes of getting a rise out of you. He doesn't want to like, actually hurt your feelings but he does want to see you pout and get a little clingy if possible. You know that that's his goal whenever he tells you about another socialite hitting on him and you entertain him by being dramatic in response, Rafayel lightly pouting at how you aren't taking him seriously but he also knows you're doing that because you love him.
When someone is genuinely trying to flirt with him and tells him that you aren't even rich or famous enough to be around him your first response is to just let him deal with it. He's very good at rejecting people but you feel bad when he meets your gaze from across the room, a pleading look on his face as he tries to convince you to come and rescue him. You decide to take pity on him and head over, trying to tell the socialite to back off. They just start to get in your face, telling you that you have no business acting the way you do, going off on you.
You just sigh and tell them that it doesn't matter how much they beg Rafayel doesn't like them and has personally told you himself how much he can't stand these parties because of people like them. You make it quite pointed that Rafayel hates these events and that if it were up to him, he wouldn't be here especially with them. Rafayel doesn't even need to say anything as he just stands behind you, arms around your waist as he just nods in agreement with your words, giving you a kiss as the other person finally gives up and fully leaves the party, embarrassed as everybody started staring at the argument that the two of you were having. The confident demeanor you have while Rafayel drapes himself off of you has everyone chuckling to themselves at how shameless the other party is, unfortunately staining their reputation as someone desperate to climb the social ladder.
Rafayel basks in the attention you showered him in and how hot he thinks it is that you made it so obvious you're his. You never left his side for the rest of the evening and he had fun introducing you to literally everyone. He'll ask you to do it more often if you can, totally obsessed with how you handled the situation so easily.
Sylus is pretty okay about the fact that you don't show any jealousy when he's flirted with. People are usually too scared of him to flirt with him anyway. Internally though, he also does want to see how you'd react when jealous. He doesn't do anything to trigger it but clearly, he doesn't really have to. Sometimes, he might make light jokes about how you don't get jealous because you know he has nothing on his mind but you. You don't have the heart to admit the fact that you know he's obsessed with you, but you also love knowing that he is. He makes it so obvious but he isn't even aware of how obvious he is about loving you, constantly spoiling you in every way.
He doesn't often attend events but he had to this one time, leading to people falling all over themselves to try and get his attention. You know that he can take care of himself but you also can't help the possessive streak that you feel at someone trying to take away something that's yours. He was having the time of his life /s avoiding everyone or making snide remarks as people try to steal his attention from you. You were trying to socialise with some people on his behalf, wanting to be friendly when you saw just how crowded he was with people trying to flirt with him.
His eyes follow you as you come to him, beginning to tell people off for acting so desperate around him. You remind them that Sylus chooses only the best and unfortunately for them, that so happens to be you. He doesn't say anything to you as you continue to tell people off, watching you with amusement in his eyes. You don't even feel his gaze as people weakly try to retaliate against your points, leading to you proving how wrapped around your finger you have him. He barely registers what's happening until he's delivering a plate of food to you, gazing at you with a soft expression that nobody's ever seen on him before. It makes it pretty clear that he won't ever see anybody that isn't you and shuts them up - if their egos aren't already decimated by how crude you were in calling out the desperate behaviour.
He'll tell you later as the two of you are getting ready for bed how flattered he was to have all of your attention on reminding people how much you love him. That overt display of affection is one he wants, obsessed with being shown in definitive ways just how much you love him.
#love and deepspace x reader#lads x reader#l&ds x reader#zayne x reader#lads zayne x reader#l&ds zayne x reader#xavier x reader#lads xavier x reader#l&ds xavier x reader#rafayel x reader#l&ds rafayel x reader#lads rafayel x reader#sylus x reader#lads sylus x reader#l&ds sylus x reader
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ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈┈ wait for your love
nanami kento x fem!reader
exhusband!nanami who was your best friend since high school. you met during your 2nd year when he was getting teased for being a loser and you defended him. he stayed close to you after and has been close to you ever since.
exhusband!nanami who was forced to come with you to all the parties that you were too shy to go to. he never minded being your DD, as long as he knew you were safe then he didn't care about not being able to drink.
exhusband!nanami's parents had always nagged him to find someone after he graduated university. he took over his dad's company and as happy as his parents were, they wanted a daughter in law! he hated all the set ups his mom made him go to so he came to you with a proposition — get married to him for a few years to make his parents happy and he'll give you however much money you wanted. you needed the money he was offering so you accepted. the wedding was small and intimate with only your close friends and some family members.
exhusband!nanami worked his ass off ever since you accepted his proposal. even if it was just a marriage of convenience, he wanted to make sure you lived happily with him.
exhusband!nanami was the perfect husband. he was attentive, loving, and always spoiled you with everything you could ever want. the ladies in your neighbourhood loved him, wishing that their husbands were a fragment of what nanami is.
exhusband!nanami spent almost 5 years of marriage in bliss with you until you started pulling away. he never pushed you to talk though because he knew you were going through something. so he waited until you were ready to talk to him.
exhusband!nanami who felt in the dark when he was served with divorce papers. he was busy with paperwork, not bothering to look up at whoever was knocking on his office door. it wasn't until the manila envelope was placed on top of his desk that he looked up to see whoever served him.
exhusband!nanami wanted at least an answer before he signs the papers. you just told him the most vague answers. "I feel like we've grown apart" "we want different things in life" "I just can't do this anymore" he was confused with every reason that you gave.
exhusband!nanami couldn't wrap his head around the separation. he thought everything was going well but once he signed the papers to finalize the divorce, he felt the weight of losing you come all at once.
exhusband!nanami who hated being with anyone else but you. even if it did start out as a loveless marriage, he fell for you hard throughout the years. every "I love you" he's ever said, he's meant it. every kiss, every hug, nanami was surprisingly a good actor but he could never fake the affection he felt for you.
exhusband!nanami despises coming home. it was eerily empty and quiet, the sound of his footsteps were the only thing he could hear. he frequently thinks about moving away to get his mind away from you but he can't. he stays at the same place you've always know where he's been just in case you ever come back.
exhusband!nanami started drinking and smoking to waste his time. he rarely drank during college and he only did during parties with you. now that you're gone, he's turned to his vices. he knows that you hate the smell of cigarettes and you hate people who couldn't handle their alcohol but why does it matter if you're not with him anymore?
exhusband!nanami still remembers every little detail about you. no matter how hard he tried, he could never forget you and everything about you. you're the love of his life even if you don't feel the same about him.
exhusband!nanami felt like everything stopped when he saw you again on the street. you're still as beautiful as ever. your hair's longer and you've changed your style, but other than that you're still his pretty ex wife.
exhusband!nanami breathlessly greeted you back when you came up and said hi to him first. he thought you would've ignored him and just went along your way, but you stayed. your eyes stare up at him as you watch him fumble over his words. his heart skips faster as he sees you grin over his flustered state.
exhusband!nanami watches you leave after catching up. he wishes that it lasted a minute longer because for the first time in what feels like forever, he feels like he can breathe properly again.
exhusband!nanami starts sobering up and taking care of himself. he threw away the bottles of alcohol and cigarettes packs so that he can get away from feeling sorry for himself. if he ever sees you again, he wants to impress you (and make you regret your decision).
exhusband!nanami is shocked when he sees your face on the doorbell camera. the weather was relentless and he sees you shivering in the cold so he opens his door immediately. he hands you a change of warm clothes and turns up the thermometer of the house. 
while he's making hot tea for the both of you, he notices the bathroom door open and out you step, his clothes basically engulfing your body. nanami looks away, trying and failing to get rid of his lewd thoughts.
"sorry those are the only clothes I have that could fit you." nanami apologizes but you shook your head. "no don't be! if anything I should apologize for inconveniencing you."
nonsense, nanami thinks, you could never bother me.
nanami disregards his thoughts, "don't worry about that, I'm just glad to get you out of that snowstorm."
he hands you a cup of tea and you take notice of the mug he has in his hand. you think out loud, "you kept that mug?"
"hmm?" nanami glances up at you then to the cup, "oh yeah. how could I throw it away? you made it for me."
"but that was back in high school."
"and? I've kept everything you've ever given me." nanami cooly responded.
you kept quiet as you take sips of the tea he made for you. the taste is familiar until you remember — he made your favourite tea, just the way you like it. you dart your eyes between the tea and the blond man.
why is he like this? why is he still making your heart flutter after all this time? you wanted to get away but you couldn't, not until the storm calms down. the news reported that it'll continue until early in the morning meaning you'll have to stay inside — with him. knowing nanami, he would never let you out because he still worries for your safety.
sleepiness was creeping up on you as you both sat in the living room. nanami sees your head bobbling through his peripheral and offers you the guest room that you promptly accepted. he leaves you be, letting you explore the home that is exactly the same as when you used to live in it.
nanami laid in his bed, moving constantly to find a comfortable position enough to fall asleep. but he couldn't.
the only thing in his mind was you who was only a few doors down away from him. were you sleeping soundly or do you feel as insomnolent as him? he wants to get up and check on you but he restrains himself. with the wind blowing, all he can hear is the rage of the snowstorm hitting the windows of the house.
nanami directs his attention from the windows to the knocking of the door. "nanami? are you awake?"
he instructs for you to come in, the light from the hallway seeps into the darkness of his bedroom. he sits up and taps the space in front of him on his bed to tell you to come sit there. "why are you still awake?"
"couldn't sleep after I got into bed. you?" you wonder as you go to sit on his bed. he chuckles, "same. do you wanna talk? I remember you used to fall asleep to me talking."
"you remember?"
"how could I forget?"
you lift your legs to place them onto the bed and cross them, wrapping your arms and pulling your knees onto your chest. "why do you still remember everything about me?"
"I was your best friend before I was your husband. even if I wanted to forget, everything about you is engrained in me." his hand moves up to tuck a piece of your hair behind your ear. "you were my first and my last, it'll be that way till I die."
"you're so dumb," you mumble into your arms, "I divorced you and you still treat me so well."
nanami grasps your wrist and brings you to his lap, his arms wrapped loosely around you. he kisses your temple softly. "does that bother you?"
"I don't know," you confess. nanami exhales before he changes the topic. "if we're being honest, can you finally tell me now why you wanted a divorce?"
you shook your head. "not really, you might hate me."
"I won't." nanami reassures, "just be honest with me dear."
you sigh.
"the marriage was feeling too real."
nanami's expression twists into confusion.
"it was an agreement between us that if one day one of us wanted to stop, we will," you continue, "and one day, I thought about it. there's going to be a day you come up to me and maybe you'll tell me that you found someone else. I don't want to go through that, I don't want to lose you but we've already gone so far. I figured it was best for me to leave before that day does come.
"you'll never have to worry about that," nanami tightens his arms around you, "it's always been you."
you hugged him back, the scent of his cologne intensifies as you nuzzle your face into the crook of his neck. "can we start over? but for real this time."
"we don't need to start over," nanami places a kiss on the top of your head, "we can just pick up where we left off."
as soon as the storm stopped, husband!nanami takes you to city hall to sign a new marriage certificate.
husband!nanami makes sure to treat you right this time. if you think that the act he was putting up was good, then nanami not having to hide his feelings is better. he's not one to shy away from physical affection in public as he always wants to hold your hand or stay very close to you.
husband!nanami who will always reassure you that he'll never leave. you are the light of his life, the reason he wants up everyday. he'll never take a day with you granted.
husband!nanami finds it adorable when you watch over the neighbour's daughter. he'll wait until her parents pick her up and then he'll bring up the thoughts that's been plaguing his mind for a while now.
"honey, what do you think about starting a family?"
ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈┈
as per usual, not proofread!! ◡̈
#nanami kento fluff#nanami kento x reader#jjk fluff#jjk x reader#jjk headcanons#jujutsu kaisen fluff#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen headcanons#jjk fic#jjk drabbles#jujutsu kaisen fic#jujutsu kaisen drabble#jjk angst#jujutsu kaisen angst#nanami kento angst
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if you fall, i will catch you
for @steddielovemonth day 2 using Time After Time by Cyndi Lauper
rated t | 855 words | no cw | tags: high school, prom, slow dance, flirting, open ending but assumed getting together
🪩🕺💃🪩🕺💃🪩🕺💃🪩💃🕺🪩
Prom is stupid.
Steve didn’t even want to come. He didn’t have a date and nothing is more embarrassing than showing up to prom alone. Even the nerds come as a group, dancing and laughing together.
His mom made an appointment for his suit fitting and he couldn’t really explain to her that there was no need. She still thinks he and Nancy are on track to be married when Nancy graduates high school. He doesn’t know how to tell her that he’ll probably die alone.
Okay, that’s a little dramatic. He’s probably not gonna die alone.
But he may die unhappy, and that’s worse.
Most of the music hasn’t been terrible so far, at least. Only one slow song played and no one seemed interested in dancing to it.
Steve’s a fucking wallflower at his own prom. He never saw this coming.
He figures he could probably escape within the next few songs, no one would even notice his absence. He makes a mental plan to wait until one of the parent chaperones walks back to the other side of the room.
Then he’s off.
He manages to escape to the hall behind the gym, the one that leads to the auditorium and drama class, not the main building of the school. No one should be back here. It’s the perfect escape route.
“Never thought I’d see the day when King Steve is trying to escape prom,” a voice says from the end of the hall. The music from the gym is echoing in here, but the voice is much louder. It’s familiar, too. “Miss Wheeler too busy with Byers to dance?”
It’s Munson. Steve sighs.
“Why are you even here?”
“It’s my senior prom, too! Or should those of us not graduating not be allowed?” Eddie walks closer and Steve sees that he’s actually dressed up. It’s not a designer suit like he’s been forced into, but it’s nice. Eddie looks…nice.
“Wait,” Steve registers what he actually said. “Not graduating?”
“Yep. Apparently quadratic formulas are crucial to my development and I cannot enter society until I understand them.” Eddie kicks his foot across the tile, leaving a scuff mark from shoes that have probably been waxed beyond necessity. “And I guess dissecting a frog and turning in homework may have helped.”
“But aren’t you pretty smart?” Steve thought he was one of those dungeon dweebs like Dustin. Dustin’s the smartest person he knows, without a doubt, kid or not. He thought all the nerds who play that game were like that.
“Sure, I’m smart enough,” Eddie scoffs. “But I don’t play by their rules. I forget to do homework. I argue.”
“But if you know the stuff, they can’t fail you.”
“Ah, but they can. I don’t have the Harrington name to convince them to change a D to a C. It’s all good. Everyone expected it.”
Steve’s brows furrow, forehead creasing as he thinks about how many things people expected of him that won’t happen.
“Just because people expect it doesn’t mean you have to give it to them,” he says.
Eddie’s eyes widen and he seems shocked by Steve’s words. But the shock wears off quickly. Steve wonders if he imagined it.
“Right you are! Very wise words from the king,” Eddie bows dramatically.
Steve laughs.
Eddie glances up, tense until he realizes Steve’s not laughing at him, just at the entertainment. He stands straight and holds out his hand.
“I do believe such wise words should be repaid with a dance,” Eddie puts on a fake British accent, nose pointed to the sky, smirk playing on his lips.
Steve thinks this must be what it’s like to be charmed by someone.
“A dance?” Steve asks. “Here? With me?”
“It would be my honor,” Eddie loses the accent and turns his head back down so he’s looking right at Steve’s eyes. “Miss Lauper wrote this song just for us, after all.”
Steve’s confusion grows until he hears the song coming from the gym. He can only imagine how awkward it must be in the gym while some couples slow dance with chaperones watching their every breath. He reaches out and takes Eddie’s hand.
“The honor is mine, sir Munson,” Steve tries for an accent like Eddie had previously, but it falls flat.
Eddie pulls him close, but hesitates before he puts an arm around his waist. Steve feels breathless all of a sudden, like they’ve rocketed into space and he forgot one of those astronaut suits. He nods, giving permission for Eddie to take the lead.
When Eddie pulls him closer, they’re almost flush against each other.
Steve’s heart is racing.
“I didn’t know you were weird,” Eddie admits quietly. It sounds a lot like admiration. He’s swaying them back and forth gently, and Steve finds it’s easy to lose track of everything but the way Eddie’s hands rest on his body. “It’s nice to see you, Steve.”
It’s a lot more than what it sounds like.
As Cyndi Lauper plays, Steve wonders if this is how his prom was always meant to be spent: in Eddie Munson’s arms, falling.
#steddie#steve harrington#eddie munson#stranger things#steddie events#steddielovemonth#steve harrington x eddie munson#prom#slow dancing#flirting#high school
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State of the Ship Address: Where we stand after the Hard Launch
Well, this has certainly been an interesting week, hasn’t it?
Last Saturday, I was the happiest of shippers, sharing why I’m so sure it’s Luke. By Wednesday, I was sharing my thoughts on why Nicola’s “just a friend” comment was nothing to worry about. Yes, truly, Nicola’s comment was a hit to the ship. A very palpable hit. Yet, we sailed on. Then on Thursday, well, the ship very nearly sunk with Luke’s Hugo Boss “hard launch” of Antonia. Nearly.
There’s one thing I’ll say I know for sure. Nicola knew she was getting that question about fans wanting her to marry Luke and she had her answer prepared. I have no doubt about that. In all likelihood, her people asked him to ask that question. Otherwise, it’s out of the box for that kind of industry/awards promotion interview. It’s not an interview for the fans, it’s for the voters. She WANTED to dispel the idea that she and Luke might have fallen in love on set because that perception would hurt her chances at the SAG Awards.
There’s no question that Nic and Luke decided together that the time had come to send an armed nuclear torpedo into the ship for once and for all. And so, they did. Indeed, it’s only thanks to our wits, grit, and some very skillful maneuvering that we managed to keep the ship from sinking to the bottom of the ocean. We may be taking on water, but we’re bailing it faster, and we’re still afloat, if only just.
This does not, however, mean that I’m ignoring what they’ve said this week. On the contrary, I’m paying very, very close attention. I’m paying attention not only to their words (or in Luke’s case, the story he’s telling with that hard launch), but also to the subtext, the backstory, the character histories, and the outtakes. I’m paying close attention both to what they’ve told us and to what they haven’t.
I’m thinking about every bit of it. I am, by nature, very analytical. In the Lukola intelligence community, I’d say I’m more of an analyst than a detective. I don’t go out there gathering information (tracking every tag, monitoring friends, family, adjacents, finding old, hidden content, etc.). I don’t even know how to get metadata from Instagram. I’d be grateful if someone could tell me.
But when the detectives bring me evidence, I analyze the hell out of it. There are great detectives out there, but that’s not my skillset. I’m great at sitting at my desk and studying the evidence presented to identify patterns, interpret clues, and assemble those clues into a watertight case.
I thought that’s what I had, a watertight case. And you need your case to be watertight when you’re sailing these rough seas, right?
Then this week, Nicola and Luke decided to tell me my case had fallen apart, and to be honest, I’m not sure how I feel. I’m not as devastated as I thought I might be. I think that’s because I’m still not sure I believe them. They’ve both told us the same thing this week, that they are absolutely, positively not together. They’ve told us in no uncertain terms. And I always thought I would believe them if that time came. And yet, there’s something just a little too suspicious and convenient about the timing for me to trust it entirely. It doesn’t quite pass the smell test.
To be clear, I’m not saying I definitely don’t believe them. I think it’s very possible they’ve told us the truth this week and we simply have to live with it. We have to shift our ship back to “endgame” mode, and out of “happening now” mode.
In some ways, this would be a relief. If I actually accepted that they are not together at all at this point, I could begin to let them go. If I don’t see their launch coming, why hang around? The wait for endgame could be eons. I love them together, but I could do a hell of a lot of other things with my time in the meantime. Why do I need to follow and discuss their every move if it’s not headed to the only result I care about? I could check out completely and let them do their thing.
I’ll watch Bridgerton, and their other work when it looks interesting, and otherwise peace out. I don’t have to be “a fan” to enjoy their work. I have loads of favorite actors whose work I love, and I follow very few of them on socials. I could simply shift NicLuke into that category and move on.
I don’t actually have to care so much about them. All this parasocial bs takes a lot of time and energy, and while that investment of time and energy is good for them because we keep them in the public discourse, it’s not necessarily the highest, best use of our time for ourselves, is it? I could just let it go. We could all just let it go. Wouldn’t that be a relief?
The problem is that I do care about them. They got us hooked during that World Tour and now we’re invested. I’m invested. I’ve put a lot into them and I’d like a return on my investment, thanks. I want to see them happy. Together. I want to see them happy together. Many of us do. So, what if we don’t get that?
Well, I’ll come back to that question. But right now, I’m more interested in the question of WHY. Why did they decide now was the time to torpedo the ship? After all these months of weird, yet skillful combination of utter silence and semi-explicit hints and breadcrumbs. Why now, after a year of active shipping, seven full months after the WT ended, long after Bridgerton 3-month ratings were locked, why spontaneously this week? And why did they do it in such a coordinated way? The SAG nomination, yes, but is there more to it?
I have more theories and variations on theories than I can count. But here are the four key interpretations I want to explore.
It’s exactly what I said this week with Nicola’s interview and my quick post on Thursday. They are still together, with major life changes ahead, and Nicola is up for a SAG. They need more privacy than ever AND Nicola needs to distance herself from the “they fell in love on-set” narrative so that she can be taken seriously as the terrific actor she is, who acted her ass off in Season 3. She doesn’t want to be seen as someone who was only that good because she was “really falling in love.”
They’re genuinely not together, Luke is actually with Antonia (whether on-and-off or all along) and they decided to shut down the shipping now purely because it was impacting Nic’s SAG nomination (see 1 for details). Or maybe L also decided it was time to launch to take the invasive scrutiny off his family.
They’re not together, L is with A, and Nic knew he was going to take her to the HB event, so she prepared fans and pre-empted any “poor, rejected Nicola” perception by saying what she did during her interview.
They were together, and now it’s over (not mutually exclusive with 2 or 3).
You’ll notice none of these theories turn on Nicola’s hypothetical romantic relationship with Jake. This is largely because I have always said that simply isn’t a romantic relationship. And regardless, it’s not relevant to this week’s developments as the state of her relationship with Jake is unchanged from the past few months. That’s not a new factor in this week’s decision.
Obviously, number 1 above is my preferred explanation. It still continues to be the only explanation that makes sense of absolutely everything we’ve seen. INCLUDING Nicola’s words in that interview, and even Luke taking A to that event if you follow the logic of protecting themselves at a critical time both personally and professionally. It’s easy to forget all the extensive evidence pointing to this, but a review of my recent posts will refresh you. There is much to this saga that literally only makes sense if Lukola is real and the other apparent relationships are PR fakery/fuckery to keep our eyes off the truth.
However, this week, they have actively told us that is not the case. So, we owe it to ourselves to be emotionally and intellectually honest and to be open to the other possibilities as well.
Okay, so let’s talk about options 2 and 3. Both posit that Luke and Antonia are really together. Or at least casually dating. It is certainly possible that Luke simply wanted or needed a date to this event and Antonia is a casual date. Certainly, their body language is not particularly close or affectionate in most of the photos or videos. And A clearly does not calm Luke’s anxiety and event nerves like Nic always could and did. And they didn’t seem to hold hands naturally, nor did their arms around each other seem particularly close or natural in most of the photos and videos we saw. And yet, they did walk and pose arm-in-arm as a couple. No arguments there.
It has been widely noted that the Daily Mail story featuring Luke attending this event with his “girlfriend Antonia” was published mere minutes after the first event photos were published. And the story talked way more about A and her vague resume/background than about Luke. For all the world, it sure looks like this appearance was designed to give Ant a PR boost with a story pre-planted and ready to roll. But that doesn’t necessarily mean they aren’t together.
There is one video recorded inside that shows them in a different light. They seem to be enjoying themselves together, laughing, smiling, and talking close. However, there was loud music, it seems, so all talking needed to be close. We saw this when Luke talked to David Beckham as well. David was leaning in and Luke was talking directly in his ear, so clearly, volume was an issue. But he did have his hand on her back and she even copped a feel of his celebrated lukey newts butt. Yes, that video looked very couply indeed. Again, no arguments.
Did I like it? Of course not. Obviously, I hated it. I loathed it even. Do I wish the whole evening would crawl away and sink itself into the bottom of the ocean in lieu of our very leaky ship? Yes. But that video still exists, as does the other photographic and videographic evidence. So, it’s irrefutable, right?
Almost. There is one thing that rankles a bit in that video. And indeed, about all the Luke & A stuff that came out so quickly. Literally, it all dropped faster than even the Beckham stuff, and Beckham was the host of this event. Why did it all hit so fast? Okay, sure, we already established it was at least partly planned PR for A. But why was that video so exclusively focused on the two of them specifically? What was the videographer doing shooting them from behind, ostensibly “in secret and candid,” for so long? Why so much footage (edited from pieces, therefore taken over time) of the two of them specifically, including that saucy, little butt grab?
If indeed this evening were intended to launch A with the explicit intentions of 1) blowing up the ship and 2) promoting A as the official girlfriend, then it’s not hard to imagine Luke’s PR handler/escort for the evening whispering a little encouragement in his ear. Something like, “It’s not really playing yet, you need to give it more. You two need to get cozy, amp it up, and we’ll get it on video.” Of course, it’s also entirely possible that this “canoodling inside” video was always planned as the final blow to seal the deal after the red carpet content hit.
And, to be fair, it’s also possible that they simply relaxed once they got inside and started having fun. If theirs is a real relationship, whether long-term, serious or a casual dating one, then that would make sense. But why were they so tense on the red carpet to begin with if they’re so close? Why did they look so uncomfortable? Either way, it seems someone had a very clear intention to capture “proof” of the relationship.
Now let’s shift gears and talk about Nicola briefly. Let’s start with this. Nicola is a terrific, gifted, hard-working actor. She deserves all the accolades. She’s worked hard to achieve the success she’s now enjoying and she sure as hell deserves her SAG Award nomination for her beautiful, delicate performance that was by turns moving, heartbreaking, heartwarming, and hilarious. She’s the real deal. And she’s unbelievably, ridiculously beautiful. To my eyes, many times more beautiful and sexier than the other woman who appears in this saga, for what it’s worth. That’s perhaps beside the point, but I wanted to throw it in anyway because what can I say? I’m feeling a little petty and in the mood to spit truths.
She’s also a woman with a right to privacy. And a woman with a career to maintain and grow. And an award nominee who’s campaigning for a win, knowing even if she doesn’t win, the nomination will open doors for her as long as she is taken seriously. And maybe, just maybe, a woman with big life changes coming up fast. I fully support her in doing what she needs to take care of herself and those she loves. And knowing what I know, having seen what I’ve seen, believing what I believe about her, I still believe she would absolutely do what she needs to do in this critical moment.
So, I’m just going to be honest and say I simply don’t know what to think at this point. I still believe number 1 above makes the most sense, both logically and emotionally. But… but… sigh.
There’s also another very real possibility, which is that Lukola has indeed been just as real as we all believe – and now, sadly, it’s over. I actually believe this could be a very real possibility, though this possibility breaks my heart most of all. But I think it’s distinctly possible that they tried and it just didn’t work out for any of the millions of reasons couples don’t make it all the time. Plus, as I’ve written about before, all the reasons they have extra challenges because of their lives and jobs. So maybe the shipping was sweet to them while the relationship lasted, but is painful now that it’s over.
I wish this didn’t feel so valid as a possibility, but it does. And this, too, would make sense of just about everything, unlike the alternate versions where the adjacents (or at least one of them) have been real partners all along. But who knows? As ever, none of us (and none of the Jakolas) knows them, so none of us will ever know anything for sure. Unless they one day decide to come clean.
I’m a big fan of the show Castle. Castle and Beckett, or “Caskett,” is one of a small handful of fictional couples that I have shipped with devotion. I LOVED Caskett and could not wait until they finally got together. The delicious tension, the longing, the near misses, the banter, the micro expressions that broke your heart. They were perfect together. Unfortunately, in reality, they grew to hate each other by the end, but onscreen, they were fire. I will never not love Caskett.
Lukola is my one and only real-world ship, and I will never not love them. Unless they really blow it with too much BTS fuckery. I feel as if they are continually jerking me around and playing games, and I’ve been A-OK with that as long as I knew where it was headed. I was willing to ride the waves of the choppy seas because I knew where the ship was sailing and I loved the destination. I didn’t begrudge them hiding behind PR fakery (or fuckery) because I had faith it was in the best interest of their careers, privacy, and more recently (once I settled into my personal opinion regarding the delicate matter), their family.
That may yet be the case. And if it is, I am 100% there for it.
But if it’s not, if Antonia ends up being a real relationship, that’s going to be very, very hard for me to accept. I’ll do my best to stay the course for Luke as an actor, but the side I see of him as someone dating her is not the same good guy he sold us on the tour. Not the same sweet Colin-alike that the cast has told us he is. Not the same perfect man Nic has told us he is. Because the choice to be with her – based on what I know of her (as well as her youth) — reflects poorly on him, in my opinion. I’m not sure about his “treatment” of her because there’s so much we don’t see and a lot of assumptions are made on that front. But simply based on who she has shown herself to be through her posts and the jobs she’s taken, I can’t respect the choice. I would accept him with many people who aren’t Nicola, but not her.
And my feelings about Nicola would also be dented because she’s posted so many of the crumbs that have (intentionally) kept me hanging on. And if, by some strange twist, she is dating Jake, well… I have a higher opinion of Jake than Antonia. I have no real issue with Jake. From what little I’ve seen of him speaking, he seems like a good kid, earnest about his work, maybe even sweet. But like Antonia, he’s so young. Setting aside aside all the other reasons I don’t believe they’re dating, he’s still 13-14 years younger than her, and just starting out while she’s sailing the heights. I have to be honest and say that the age difference and the power differential do make me uncomfortable.
Her relationships are still not my business. Nor are Luke’s. But as a consumer of media, I do get to have feelings about the people I stan and where I choose to devote my energies. As I said, Lukola has been my one and only ship. I’ve loved them individually as well, but if I’ve been played for a prolonged time, if they’ve been stringing me along with a fake ship, how can that not sour me on them as individuals?
So, yes, if these particular, adjacent relationships are real, my respect for each of them will take a hit. But they can date other people. I’ll get over it. I’ll be disappointed. I’ll think they’ve missed out because they clearly have something truly unique and special, maybe more unique than either of them realizes yet. I still believe they’ve gotten together at some point, but if they’ve now moved on, I’ll sigh and move on as well. And hope that one day, they find their way back to each other where they belong. That’s what endgame means, after all.
However, I will say again that I am not yet entirely convinced that the adjacents are anything more than I’ve long thought they were, decoys and distractions. Or that these latest hits to the ship (the mom comment, Nicola’s interview, and the “hard launch”) are anything more than ramped up efforts to camouflage the truth at a crucial time.
But the one thing that is crystal clear is that they want us to back the fuck off. Whether it’s out of a time-sensitive need for greater professional separation for career reasons (awards consideration chief among them) and greater privacy for family reasons… or because it’s actually true that they are not together at this time… either way, they’ve clearly decided to shut down the shipping this past week.
And this brings me back to Castle. If you know Castle, then you know there was a long-running throughline story about who murdered Kate’s (aka Beckett’s) mother. For years, Kate was obsessed with finding who was responsible and what happened, and more than once, that fierce dedication led her to go too far on the job. She’d stay on cases when she had a clear conflict, she’d hide things from her superiors, she’d go rushing into danger in a ruthless pursuit of the truth. Needless to say, this behavior eventually led to a suspension even though she was the best detective in the precinct. But instead of accepting the suspension, Kate tossed down her badge and quit, because OBVIOUSLY, she was going to go right on investigating privately.
So, am I going to pull a Kate Beckett and charge forward, despite every warning, to investigate every lead until I get the truth? No matter what it costs to me or those I love (namely, Lukola)? Or will I sadly accept my suspension, hang my head, and take some time at home to catch up on my Netflix until the clock runs out? Hmm… Maybe, a little of both?
Here’s what I’m going to do. Keep watching. Keep collecting information, analyzing, and seeing how I think the picture most clearly takes shape. And I will keep sharing my thoughts with all of you.
But since they want us to back off, I will slow roll those observations. For my part (NPC that I am), I will politely take a step back and give them the time that I believe they need for certain very specific reasons. If they need folks like me to back off, then I will. At least for now. And I’ll see what the next couple of months bring.
At some point down the line, depending on how things shake out, I may feel comfortable going full force again with my thoughts and opinions. But right now, it’s my belief that there are things important enough that I’m willing to take a step back to support them, because my intention has only ever been to share my thoughts and bolster the spirits of my fellow shippers. Never to harm Lukola.
In the meantime, I won’t disappear entirely. I may blog a little less, and maybe shift a bit to lovely Polin. Or maybe I’ll end up blogging more with short, fun stuff in lieu of the analysis. Who knows? Got to keep busy somehow, at least unless or until I decide to step off the ship entirely.
Actually, now that I think about it, it may be time to rewatch Castle. At least I know Caskett will never let me down.
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A Pair of Plushies
Pairing: Sylus x Fem|Reader
Summary: I got this cute interaction playing the claw machine and it just screamed Sylus wanting to make two of MC. AKA, Sylus wants to be a girl dad.
Content warnings: Adult language. Breeding kink. P in v. Porn with feelings. Pregnancy fic. Tooth rotting fluff!
Length: 9500
It is strange how such profound changes in your life can come from the most mundane of instances. You were having a pretty normal day, you had just gotten off of work and were relaxing with your boyfriend at the arcade. Sylus was braving the afternoon to come out and see you. Your schedules were pretty different since he was awake almost exclusively during the night and you worked during the day.
But you were together today and were at one of the claw machines trying to get even more plushies. You had accumulated an impressive collection but there were always more that you wanted. Today you were at the machine giving Sylus directions to help him get the hearty hearts plushie.
The plushie fell into the bin and you clapped happily as he retrieved it and handed it to you.
“Two little cuties together are definitely twice as adorable!” you said, holding the little heart plushie to your chest.
Sylus shook his head. “Aren’t you tired of seeing something that looks exactly the same?”
“Never! That’s what makes it cute. Just imagine waking up to two little plushies right beside you--” You paused, noticing the way Sylus’s gaze focused. “Why are you suddenly staring at me?”
He smirked. “I’m looking at the mirror behind you. Having two of you wouldn’t be too bad, actually.”
You rolled your eyes, thinking that he had meant that in some salacious way and turned back to the machine. The rest of your afternoon passed, after you left the arcade you stopped by a cafe for drinks and you noticed Sylus was still staring at you much in the same way he was back at the arcade.
You were used to Sylus staring at you but there was something off about it. Usually when he stared it was because he had something dirty on his mind. It usually meant the second you were alone he would be crowding you against the nearest flat surface. But you didn’t get that from him today. He looked almost wistful, a small serene smile on his face.
You gave his leg a tap under the table. “What are you so smiley about?” you asked. “Do I have something on my face?”
“No. Just thinking about something.” he leaned back in his chair, giving you one more complete glance over and nodded. “Yes. I think that will do very well.”
“What are you talking about? Do I get to know?”
He only smiled. “Remember when you told me to imagine waking up to two of the same plushies every morning?”
“Yeah…I think I see where this is going.” Either this was going to be a sex in front of a mirror request or possibly a desire for more plushies. You had a feeling you knew which one he was referring to though. “And I will say I am open to it.”
His eyes widened slightly. “Really? I only just decided to ask and you’re already on board?”
“It’s not like it’s that big a request. I feel like I’ve done far stranger things, especially with you.” you shrugged.
“Not a big request? And what exactly have you done that is stranger?”
“Well I’m not going to talk about that in a cafe.” you said. “Isn’t this something that should wait to be discussed at home?”
“We can, of course. If that would make you most comfortable.” he was grinning even wider, “There is a lot more to discuss about it that we are going to need to get into.”
“How much more could there possibly be?” He was being very intense about a mirror kink.
“A lot more. Like when you want to start trying, what kind of doctor do you want to go to, how is living arrangements going to work? Are you moving in or were you going to be adamant about keeping your own apartment? Do you want us to get married first--”
“Whoa! Whoa! WHOA!” you held up your hands. “What in the world are you talking about? What does any of that have to do with this?”
Sylus paused, his brow furrowing. “Sweetie, what do you think I’m talking about?”
“I mean, I thought you were talking about--you know--” you leaned in closer, your voice a whisper so not to be overheard by anyone else “having sex in front of a mirror? Two of me. That kind of thing.”
Sylus snorted, his shoulders shaking slightly as he held in a laugh. “What? What’s so funny? What were you actually talking about?”
“Oh my beloved,” he sighed, taking your hand over the table. “When I said two of you I meant a mini-you.”
“A mini-me? Like a doll? Why would you--” it finally dawned on you what he meant. Your face heated as embarrassment flooded in. “Oh. I see. A mini-me.”
“Finally get there, did you?” he cocked his head at you. “So, what do you think?”
“I mean…” you didn’t know how to respond. “Just to make sure I’m not misinterpreting again. You are talking about…”
“Getting you pregnant and starting a family. Yes.” Sylus nodded.
“Got it.”
“Now that you know what I was asking you don’t seemed at all enthused about it.”
“I mean, I don’t know how to respond to that out of the blue. It came on so suddenly and while I would like to be a mother one day I guess I didn’t expect it to get brought up quite like this. Usually when people decide to have kids it’s something they do after they get married. We’ve only been dating for a little over a year now. Are you sure you want to have a kid with me? God forbid we break up one day we’re still going to have an entire person connecting us.”
“Bold of you to assume I’d ever let us break up.” Sylus said. “I’m afraid you are stuck with me, sweetie.”
“And bold of you to say we’re stuck together when you haven’t put a ring on it.”
“Do you want me to? I will. We can go down to the jewelry store and buy a ring right now. Depending on how big of a ceremony you want we can be married by the end of the day. Then again, if we do get married I’d like to make a spectacle out of it complete with you in a pretty white dress I get to tear off after the reception.”
“Sylus!” you hissed, hiding your face behind your hands. He always talked so brazenly with you about his desires. It flustered you to no end when they were just carnal desires but this sudden need of his to marry and impregnate you was a thousand times worse. You could barely look at him. Everything he said was too open. Too honest. It made you self conscious thinking about how sincere and direct he was being.
“What? Is it embarrassing to love you? Is it embarrassing to let you know exactly what I picture for us? Since meeting you, this has been what I’ve dreamt of one day having. And today, when you mentioned two of something I realized I didn’t want to wait any longer. I want that life with you. Say you want that life with me too.”
“I…I…” everything screamed in you that this was moving too fast. You did love him but marriage? A child? You didn’t even live together and he was proposing things with a much bigger commitment right now!
Sylus could see you fumbling for an answer and sighed, the light in his eyes dimming a bit. “It’s a lot to ask all at once. I see that. Take all the time you need to respond.”
Wow. Okay.
You finished at the cafe and you started making your way back to your apartment with Sylus. The ride back was quiet. You were thinking about a lot. You knew that you definitely loved Sylus and the idea of marrying him and having a family with him one day was something you wanted. His offer didn’t scare you for that reason. You were in this relationship for the long haul. It was the fact that it all just got put out there so quickly.
Usually when girls get proposed to they can sometimes see it coming. Their partner tells them to go get their nails done, they plan a really romantic date out of nowhere, you get to dress up in something super pretty and nice. All of it to make sure the moment is a picturesque as possible. Sylus dropping that he wants to get you pregnant and then basically proposing in the middle of a cafe after you confused his wants for mirror sex was not how you would have ever imagined this happening!
It was a lot to take in. And maybe you should have been more scared by the idea. But the longer you sat with the question you realized you already knew the answer. You wanted to spend your life with Sylus. You wanted to create a life with him, both metaphorically and literally. It was daunting to think about but it didn’t scare you.
You pulled up to your apartment and you invited Sylus up. Once you got inside you kicked off your shoes and pulled Sylus closer, pushing yourself to your toes to loop your arms around his neck and kiss him. He didn’t miss a beat and kissed you back softly.
“Yes.” you said when you pulled back.
“Yes?” he repeated. Eyes searching your face, “Tell me what you are saying yes to, sweetie.” his grip on you got a little tighter.
“I want to marry you.” you smiled brightly, “And I want to start a family with you.”
A small breath of relief left him and he rested his forehead against yours. “You had better mean that.”
“I do.”
“Perfect.” he closed the distance to kiss you. You melted into his embrace as he kissed you over and over. The moment you ran out of breath and pulled back to breathe he was pulling you in again. Your knees were losing their ability to keep you standing and Sylus placed his hands on your ass and hauled you off the ground, wrapping your legs around his waist.
“Care to start trying now?” he asked. You were still standing in the living room but he was waiting to point you towards the bedroom.
“You want to start right now?” you asked, breathless.
“Why not?”
Maybe it was the emotion of the afternoon or maybe you were hormonal but you ended up nodding. “Okay.”
He started turning towards the bedroom. “Say it, sweetie. What do you want?”
Your face heated again. “I want to start a family with you. I want you to put a baby in me, Sylus. And I want to do it now.”
He carried you back to the bedroom and laid you down on the bed. Considering everything you knew about Sylus and past experience in the bedroom you expected something hard and feral. You had just told him to put a baby in you. You thought that he was going to tear your clothes off and bend you into a mating press for the rest of the night. You were surprised when he stepped back and slowly started peeling out of his clothes.
You started to take off your own clothes but Sylus stopped you. “Let me do that, sweetie.” he pulled the shirt off over your head. You watched as he carefully helped strip you out of your clothes, pressing small kisses to each new inch of skin that was revealed.
“You’re so beautiful.” he whispered, staring at your naked form. “I can’t wait to see you pregnant. Can’t wait to see you swell up with our kid.” he ran a hand along your stomach. “You have no idea how happy you’ve made me today, sweetie. Happiest I’ve ever been in my life.”
“Sylus…” you reached out to cup his face. “I love you. I love you so much.”
He bent closer to kiss you again. “I love you too.”
While maintaining the kiss his hand slid between your legs and started playing with your pussy. He teased your clit, rubbing it in slow circles. He swallowed your moans the moment they left your lips. Instinctually your hips moved up into his touch. He used the heel of his hand to hold your hips down.
“Stay slow, kitten. I want to savor this.” he murmured against your lips.
He pushed a finger into your heat, drawing more sweet moans out of you as he began to help stretch and prepare your body.
Knowing that you were currently having sex with the intention of getting pregnant was surreal. It felt like any other encounter you had but pleasure was not the only goal. You were going to create a life together. A whole new person, one made up of a little of you and a little of him was going to be in the world. And then you just had that new person for the rest of your lives. You’d be parents. You were going to be in charge of raising a kid.
How was raising a kid even going to work with your lives? Sylus was the leader of Onychinus and lived in the N109 zone. He wasn’t going to leave but you also didn’t want your kid to be deprived of Linkon blue skies and a normal life. There was so much more for you to think about that you hadn’t considered.
“I would love to know where your mind has gone when I have a hand between your legs, kitten.” Sylus said, breaking you out of your thoughts.
“Sorry. I was just thinking about how we are going to raise this kid once they’re born.” you said.
“We haven’t even attempted to get you pregnant and you’re worrying about that already?” Sylus scoffed. “At least I know you’re not thinking of backing out if you’re thinking about all of that.”
“I can’t help it. I want our kid to have the best life but also a normal one. Do you think they can have that in the N109 zone?” you asked.
“For our child, I’ll make anything possible.” he cupped your cheek. “Now, do you want to start?”
You nodded. “Yes. Please.”
Sylus smiled and kissed you again. He withdrew his hand and lined himself up with your pussy before slowly pushing in. Twin breaths of satisfaction left you as he sunk in. He stayed close to you, his body pressed on top of yours as his hips rolled against yours. It was such an even and steady unhurried pace. You couldn’t believe it took you till now to realize that he wasn’t just having sex with the intention of getting you pregnant, he was making love to you.
He wanted this first act of you two coming together to make a baby to be done with love, not just lust. No matter what interaction past this got you pregnant, this was your first honest attempt and it was done with nothing short of unending love and adoration.
“Can’t wait to get you pregnant,” Sylus panted as he steadily drove into you. “I’m going to lock us away and fuck you every day until I know you’re knocked up. Fuck, I want to put a baby in you. I want to knock you up so damn bad, kitten.” his pace got a little faster as the need for release drew closer.
“Sylus! Please!” your nails scratched into his back. “I want you to. I want you to knock me up. Please!”
“Fuck kitten!” he groaned, biting into your shoulder. “You’re gonna be so damn pretty all big with my kid. Gonna fuck a baby into you and then I’m gonna put another one in you and another. I want to have as many babies with you as I can get!”
Good god above. How many kids did this man expect you to pop out?
“You’re gonna be such a good mom to our kids.” he lathered hot wet kisses along your throat. “And I’m gonna make you my wife. Our whole lives are ahead of us, and we’re gonna spend them together just like this. Happy, in love, and fucking each other senseless.”
“Yes! Please Sylus! I want it! I want it all!” your legs were locked tight around his hips, wanting to keep him as close to you as humanly possible.
“Come for me, sweetie. I want you to come when I get you pregnant.” he pressed a finger to your clit, rubbing it furiously to help get you there.
“Sylus!” you moaned, nails digging into his back as you came. Blinding little white dots danced before your vision as you came. A buzzing warmth vibrated from the tips of your toes to the ends of your hair. Sylus gave one final thrust into you and stilled as he came inside you, breathing heavily and moaning your name.
You loosened your grip on him and rubbed your hands along his back. “Sylus…” your head was foggy in the aftermath.
“Right here, sweetie.” he pressed a kiss to your temple. “How do you feel?”
You smiled, pulling him down for a proper kiss. “Amazing. I think we actually made a baby today.”
“I hope so.” he touched your stomach. “But, it can never hurt to be thorough.”
“You are insatiable.” you rolled your eyes.
“Only because it is you, beloved.” He pulled out and laid down next to you, one of his hands still resting on your stomach. “I already can’t wait to meet our little one.”
~~~
The next month was filled with nothing but you and Sylus having sex so you could get pregnant. It didn’t really matter that you were sure you had gotten pregnant that first day you started trying, Sylus wanted to make sure your pregnancy was a certainty. He also loved the excuse of locking you up all for himself.
You hadn’t told anyone about your plans yet. No one outside of you and Sylus even knew that you were trying to have a kid. Except maybe Luke and Keiran but that was because Sylus had already set them on the task of baby proofing the mansion. He never said baby proof but suddenly telling the twins to do stuff like sand down table edges to not be sharp and put covers on unused electric outlets was a bit of a tip off.
After a month of constant sex though you decided to go out and buy a pregnancy test. You weren’t feeling any symptoms yet but you were too impatient to find out if it had happened yet or not. You had bought an assortment and took them home. After a long time in the bathroom and what felt like an even longer wait you had the results.
Positive. All of the tests in their own way said the same thing. You were pregnant.
You were pregnant!
Oh god you were pregnant. It was actually happening. It wasn’t just a fun little roleplay in the bedroom. It was real. There was an actual life growing inside of you.
You immediately grabbed your phone to tell Sylus then put it away. This was an in-person announcement. You sped over to the N109 zone as fast as you could and pulled up to the mansion. You knew at this early an hour Sylus would still be asleep but you couldn’t wait.
Luke and Kieran were in the living room moving a bunch of breakable objects to higher shelves. “Hey there, what are you doing here so early? Boss man is still asleep.” they said.
“I know but I have something important to tell him.”
“Oh thank god,” Luke sighed, “Does this mean we can hang out here when you both are here again? We don’t have to keep ourselves busy outside while you’re going at it?”
“I knew you two knew what was going on.”
“It was fairly obvious. Do you think boss man would be having us redecorate like this just for the fun of it?” Kieran said. “Congratulations though.”
“Thanks. But remember, if Sylus asks you two don’t know a damn thing. I told him first, got it?”
“Yes ma’am.” they gave little salutes and you skipped down the hall to Sylus’s room.
You opened his door and found him asleep as the twins had said. There was too much excitement in your body. You closed the door behind you and sprinted for the bed, throwing yourself across Sylus’s lap. He woke with a start, automatically grabbing you before realizing that it was you and not any kind of threat. He let out a sigh and rested his head back against the headboard.
“Sweetie, I was sleeping.”
“I know. But I figured you would want to know that I was pregnant as soon as possible.”
His eyes snapped open again, staring at you. “Repeat that for me.”
“I’m pregnant. I took a bunch of tests and they all came up positive.” you took his hand and placed it over your stomach. “We’re having a baby.”
He rolled you under him and kissed you then pulled up your shirt and kissed your stomach. “Sylus!” you laughed, his kiss tickling you slightly.
“It’s actually happening,” he murmured, resting his head on your stomach. “We’re actually going to have a child in a few months.”
“Yep.” you ran your hands through his hair. “I’m a little scared but mostly excited.”
“I cannot wait to meet you, little one.” he spoke to your stomach. “Don’t worry, you have a wonderful mama who’s going to make sure you grow into a healthy baby and daddy is going to be here to make sure she has anything she wants.”
“Anything I want? Really?”
“You’re doing something incredible. Of course I would do anything for you.” he looked up at you. “I just have one favor to ask in return.”
“A bigger favor than grow an entire human?”
“Move in.” he said. “I don’t want to miss a moment of this. Move in with me, please.”
“But what about all my stuff and my apartment? I can’t just break my lease.”
“I’ll take care of your apartment and we have more than enough room for all of your stuff.” Sylus assured you. “What do you say?”
“I mean, it had to happen sometime.” you shrugged with a smile.
And so you moved in with Sylus. He sent the twins to your house to pack up and move your things out. It was strange to just pick up and move but it was also strange to just in an instant decide you were going to become a wife and mother with the leader of Onychinus as your husband and father of your child.
Moving in when you did turned out to be a good move because soon after everything had been moved over the pregnancy symptoms started up in earnest. You were tired, your boobs hurt, you learned morning sickness was something that hit at every hour of the damn day and not just mornings as the name suggested. In a word, it was miserable.
Thankfully Sylus was very attentive to your needs, rubbing your back and making sure you had water to drink after you threw up, making sure you wouldn’t be disturbed whenever you needed a nap, and massaging the aches out of your body. He had told you to go on maternity leave but considering you were only in the first trimester of your pregnancy you didn’t see the need to take off of work just yet. However, you did need to let them know that you were now expecting.
That brought on a lot of questions from your co-workers as to how far along you were and who the father was. At this point everyone kind of knew that you had something going on with Sylus, or they knew him as “Skye” the fruit seller. Some were shocked but others were excited and looked forward to being able to throw you a baby shower.
It was a lot going on. Your body was changing, you moved, everyone at work was looking at you differently now, it felt like a lot to navigate and the stress was tarting to get to you. One day you had called off of work because you were just too damn tired to do anything. Your body ached all over, you woke up crying because you missed hearing birds in the morning, Sylus’s shampoo smell was making you gag, and you had a sudden craving for the most artery clogging cheesy corn dogs you could find.
You were lying in bed, curled in a tight ball quietly sniffling. Sylus had tried to comfort you but you snapped at him and now he was gone. You missed him even if he smelled bad. You wanted him back. You rolled to your other side and stared at the bedroom door. “Sylus?” you called out. “Are you out there?”
The door opened but you were disappointed to see the twins and not Sylus. “Hi, boss man stepped out a while ago to pick something up. He’ll be back soon.”
“He didn’t tell me he was leaving.” you muttered, fresh tears brimming in your eyes. “Why didn’t he tell me? He always tells me when he needs to go.”
“Uh…” the twins looked at each other, not knowing what to do. “Can we get you anything? Boss man told us to get you anything you needed.”
“I want Sylus.” you shimmied under the covers, hiding yourself from view so they couldn’t see you break down.
You could still hear the twins outside talking. “You have to call him.”
“Me? Why do I have to be the one to call him and tell him his baby mama is having an emotional breakdown cause he left?”
“You think I want to do that?”
“Rock paper scissors for it.”
“No. Just call him.”
“You call him!”
“Both of you get the fuck out!” you snapped from under the covers.
“Sorry!” they shut the door and disappeared. You felt a little peck at your head and groaned, rolling away from Mephisto. You had forgotten that damn bird was still here. He landed on your shoulder and pecked you again.
“Go away! Leave me alone!” you tried to swat him away.
“He’s just trying to get your attention, sweetie.” You heard Sylus’s voice. You bolted upright, scaring Mephisto off of you. You looked around but saw no sign of Sylus. That’s when you realized his voice was coming out of Mephisto.
“Mephisto can take calls now?”
“Think of him more like a baby monitor.” Sylus said. “He alerted me that you weren’t doing well and wanted me home. Don’t worry, I’m pulling back up to the house now.”
“Where did you go?”
“I went to pick up some food for my tired and hungry girlfriend.” he said. “Be with you in a second.”
You waited a minute and sure enough Sylus walked in with a large take out bag in his hands. It smelled heavenly. “Miss me?”
You nodded, holding out your arms. He set the food down and collected you in a hug. “Sorry I didn’t mention I was leaving. You didn’t seem keen to see me and I thought I’d be back before you wanted me again.”
“I was fine…” you muttered, embarrassed by how needy you were being.
“It’s fine that you weren’t. I like that you want me around.” he kissed the top of your head. “Do you still want cheesy corn dogs? I bought a lot from that one food truck you love.”
“Oh my god, yes!” you were salivating already.
Sylus handed you the bag full of hot and fresh cheesy corn dogs. You scarfed down three in record time, the cheese and carbs hitting in a way that made you moan as you ate. “Can I eat just these for the rest of my life?”
“Oh, I think you may end up craving something new in a week so we’ll see how long it lasts. But for now you can have whatever it is you want.”
You wiped some of the grease from your mouth. “I’m sorry for snapping at you earlier.”
“It’s alright.” he bent his head closer. “Is this a better shampoo? I showered again to wash it out.”
“You didn’t need to do that.”
“You didn’t like the smell of the last one so I got unscented shampoo and used that instead. I also put in an order for some birds that we can keep nearby so you can hear them sing in the mornings like you’re used to.”
“Oh my god, Sylus.” you rolled your eyes. “You didn’t need to buy an entire aviary of birds. You could have just put bird songs as an alarm or something. Buying actual birds to keep in the house is crazy.”
“I like to think they can also keep Mephisto company.” Sylus shrugged. “The house could use some more cheer anyway.”
“My collection of plushies didn’t already do that?”
“This is your home now as well as mine. Whatever you want it to be, we will have it made. Gut the entire house and remake it as your own if you wish. I’ll only ask that I keep the vault as it is now.”
“I’m not gonna gut the entire house.” you leaned against him. “Well, maybe one room. We still need to figure out where we’re going to put the nursery.”
“Ah, I’ve actually already thought of that.” he stood up. “Care to come take a look?”
You took his hand and he led you a little bit down the hall. One of the rooms that you knew had just been a guest room had been cleared out of everything and the walls repainted to a blank white. “I was waiting for you to mention the nursery so you could pick out whatever furniture you wanted to decorate it with. I also didn’t know if you wanted to wait until we knew the gender to go shopping so I’ve been putting it off. But we have this room and it’s not too far from us so we’ll always be close by when they need tending.”
You looked around the blank room, “It’s perfect.”
Soon enough it was time for your first ultrasound. You were excited and a little nervous. This was the first time you were going to actually see your baby. And despite Sylus saying that the doctor’s in the N109 zone were just as good as any Linkon doctor you insisted on going to Linkon for your appointments.
You laid back on the exam bed and rolled up your shirt to expose your stomach. At this point in your pregnancy they said you’d be able to see the baby, hear their heartbeat, but gender would still be a few weeks away. The cold jelly was applied and the technician moved the wand around for a moment before finding the baby.
“And there they are.” the technician turned the screen to you to see. On the screen was a blurry little blob in the shape of a bean. Your baby.
You gripped Sylus’s hand tighter, tears gathering in your eyes. “That’s our baby.” you said breathlessly. “Oh wow, there really is a baby in there.”
“Yes there is.” the technician laughed. “Feels a lot more real now, huh?”
“Yeah.” you let Sylus wipe the tears from your eyes. “Oh wow. I didn’t think I’d get this emotional.”
“It’s perfectly normal, especially for first time moms.” the technician said. “How are we feeling, dad?”
“They’re perfect.” Sylus said.
“About as perfectly healthy as an eight week old bean could be--oh.” the technician paused and moved the wand around some more. “Well then, hello to you too.”
“What? What is it?” you asked.
“Your baby has a roommate in there.” the technician pointed out on the screen. “Baby one, and just over here, baby two.”
“Baby two?” your mouth dropped open. “I’m having twins?”
“Looks like it. Congratulations! Since you are carrying twins there are some more details to go over for multiple fetus pregnancies.”
“Uh huh…” you turned to Sylus. “Twins. We’re having twins.”
Sylus’s smile threatened to split his face in half. “This is amazing.”
“Of course you’re excited, you don’t have to push out two babies at once.” you continued to stare at the screen. “Oh my god.”
After the initial shock wore off the technician found the heartbeat for you and that was when the emotions of the day started to bubble over. You started sobbing hearing those steady little thumps over the monitor. Two strong healthy heartbeats for two tiny little beans. When you looked over at Sylus you saw that he was crying too. You hadn’t expected him to get so emotional over this as well but it was comforting in a way. He was just as excited for this as you, probably more excited honestly.
You got your due date from the doctor and your follow up appointment made and a copy of the ultrasound picture before leaving. In about seven more months you were going to have not one but two babies. Sylus was over the moon. The second you returned home he had put the pictures in a scrapbook he had bought to catalog your pregnancy and happily announced to the twins that they were not going to be the only twins in your life anymore. Luke and Keiran were ecstatic hearing the news that you were having twins and gave you huge hugs.
Time kept moving ever forward and you were growing larger and larger as the babies grew with you. You were officially into the second trimester and you looked it. Carrying twins made what would have already been a big pregnancy belly even bigger. It was also at this time that you learned what exactly you were carrying. You had debated keeping the gender of the babies a surprise but knew you were too impatient for that.
Girls. You were carrying twin baby girls.
“Guess you really are getting a mini-me, huh?” you said when the doctor announced the gender to you.
“Not just a mini-you. A pair of mini-yous.” Sylus said, his smile brighter than the sun as he stared at the screen. “What was it you had said a couple months ago at the arcade? ‘Two little cuties together are definitely twice as adorable.’ I believe it was.”
“Yeah, I think that was it.” you sighed. “I didn’t think when I said that it would lead to us actually having two little cuties though.”
“Winning that plushie was the best thing that could have happened that day. It led to all this.” he kissed you soundly. “
Sylus had already been a little over protective of you when you were just carrying one baby but now that he knew you were growing twins he was getting to be a little overbearing. He wanted you to rest as much as you could and to just focus on growing the twins but you were getting bored just sitting around all day.
Eventually you were able to convince Sylus to let you go out shopping for furniture for the nursery. He was more than happy to take you to the most expensive baby store in the city and told you to ignore price on everything and just get whatever you wanted. You rolled your eyes but didn’t try to fight him on it. You wanted the best for your babies after all. You certainly weren’t going to say no to a very nice but stupidly expensive recliner to put in the nursery either. You had a feeling you were going to be in it a lot and you wanted it to be as comfy as possible.
It was as you were looking at cradles, debating whether to get connecting ones for the twins or not that you felt something in your stomach. It was strange and you weren’t sure what you felt until it happened again. It was little and fluttery and you realized with a start that the babies were moving! You could feel them moving!
You paused, a hand over your swollen stomach as you let yourself focus on the fluttering inside.
Sylus noticed you stop and immediately concern etched into his face. “Something wrong? Are you feeling sick? Do we need to go home?”
“No. Nothing’s wrong.” you assured him with an easy smile. “I just felt the babies move for the first time and it caught me off guard.”
“They’re moving?” Sylus gasped, touching a hand to your stomach.
“I don’t know if you can feel them from the outside yet.” you told him. “But they are definitely kicking around a lot in there from what I can feel. It feels really fluttery, like I have actual butterflies in my tummy.”
“Our little butterflies growing in their cocoon.” he said, rubbing your stomach affectionately. “Make sure you grow even stronger girls, daddy wants to be able to feel you kick too.”
“Not too strong, I don’t want them bruising my insides or each other.”
“A little sibling rivalry is good but yes, keep in mind not to hurt your mother when you move around my little butterflies.” he said.
You smiled, your eye catching a spinning mobile. The charms on the mobile were colorful butterflies that spun around while a soft lullaby played. “I think I have an idea on what kind of theme to make the nursery now.”
By the end of the week Sylus had the nursery walls painted to resemble a beautiful flowering garden. The furniture you had picked out was being assembled by the twins and arranged around the room per your instructions. You had even gotten the ceiling painted to resemble a brilliant blue sky with fluffy white clouds in various fun shapes. It didn’t matter if the N109 zone wasn’t like Linkon, your kids could have a beautiful blue sky and garden from the comfort of their room.
It was all coming together so perfectly. With each passing day the house was looking more like a home safe for babies to crawl around in and you were one day closer to being parents.
You were lying in beed one evening as you entered your third trimester. Sylus was next to you talking to the twins since they decided to stay awake all evening and not let you get any sleep. Seems they were taking after their father’s nocturnal habits.
“And remember girls, your mother is going to say that I can’t sing but you need to know that she is wrong. I am a perfectly capable singer and she’s just jealous, that’s why she doesn’t take me out to karaoke anymore.”
“Don’t listen to him girls, he is actually tone deaf.”
“Stop contradicting me in front of the children.”
“Stop lying to them then.”
“I’m not lying.”
“You are tone deaf though. It’s actually kind of amazing.”
Sylus frowned, whisper conspiratorially with your stomach. “I’m going to let her think she’s won but in truth you two know the truth. Daddy can sing.”
You gave Sylus a nudge with your foot. “Be glad it takes too much energy to sit up so I can’t properly chastise you.”
“If it keeps you here in bed where I know I can keep an eye on you and the kids then I will plenty glad of it.” Sylus scooted back up the bed next to you. “Getting close now, how are you feeling?”
“I’m feeling like I’m about ready to pop. I think if I plug my nose and you blow into my mouth the girls will just pop out of me. Can we test it?”
“I think it’s best to let them pass organically but I can accommodate part of your request.” he leaned forward and kissed you.
“Sylus, can I ask you something?”
“Anything?”
“If my body doesn’t snap back to what it was like from before the twins, will you still think I’m beautiful?”
His brow furrowed. “How dare you think I would think you were less beautiful for anything. I don’t care what your body looks like, kitten. Right now you are the most beautiful I have ever seen you. Your body is swollen with our children. You practically glow from the inside out. And after you have the kids you will still be the most gorgeous woman in all of creation. Never doubt that. In fact,” he whistled to Mephisto and the mechanical bird flew off to grab something out of a drawer and came back to deposit it in Sylus’s hand. “I think now is the perfect time to give you this.”
He held out a small velvet box to you. You opened it to find the most beautiful ring you had ever seen inside. “Is this…?”
“I meant what I said, beloved. You are the most beautiful and amazing woman that has ever been. You fill every day of my life with joy and light and music. From the moment I met you I knew that I wanted you to not only be my wife but the mother of my children. Now that our kids are nearly born I think it is about time I make this official as well.” he took the ring out, “Will you marry me and be my wife?”
“Yes. Of course I will!” you nodded, tears in your eyes.
He slipped the ring on your finger and kissed you again. “You make me the happiest I have ever been every single day.” he murmured against your lips. “After the girls are born we can start wedding planning?”
“You don’t want to get married before they come?” you asked.
“We can, but I’d like it if we could have them in the wedding pictures. Not that I wouldn’t love to see you as a pregnant bride but I think having them dressed as little flower girls would be far cuter. What do you think?”
“I think I like that idea.” you looked down at your stomach. “Hear that girls? After you’re born you get to be flower girls in mommy and daddy’s wedding.”
The girls had finally stopped kicking around for the night so you didn’t get any kind of answer back. But at least you could go to bed now. You looked at the ring on your finger and looked back at Sylus. “I love you, my fiance.”
“Fiance,” he tested the word on his tongue, “I like the sound of that. And in a couple months after the girls are born and we’ve had time to settle into parent life I’ll be able to call you wife.”
“Fiance. Wife. Mother. I’m collecting a lot of new names.”
“That reminds me,” Sylus said, “We still haven’t talked about what we are going to name the twins.”
“Oh fucking hell…”
~~~
Sylus was away. He had a business deal that he needed to go see and no matter how much he tried to get them to do it remotely the seller refused adamantly that it could only be done in person. This was a problem for Sylus in many ways, the first and biggest being that you were now three days past your due date and he was very anxious about being apart from you.
He was about to cancel the whole thing but you had assured him that if the twins hadn’t popped out already the chances they were going to come during the twenty four hours he wasn’t home wasn’t going to happen. So with much nagging from your part, and a little honesty about needing some time alone to relax without his hovering, he left.
That was the first mistake. The second mistake was deciding to take a trip over to Linkon without anyone there to assist you. You were in the supermarket looking at snacks when you felt a powerful and painful cramp that made you drop the bag of chips you were holding.
“Oh no. Oh no no no no no no no no no!” Was that a contraction? Please no! You couldn’t go into labor while Sylus was gone!
Maybe it was just Braxton Hicks contractions. There was no way the babies were coming right after you assured Sylus that there was no way it was going to happen while he was gone. No way!
You tried to bend over and pick up the chips but your belly wouldn’t let you so you just kinda left them there on the ground and grabbed a fresh bag from the shelf. You were standing in the checkout line when another contraction hit, just as intense as the last. Shit!
“Ma’am, are you alright?” the friendly cashier asked.
“Oh, I’m fine. I think.” you breathed through the pain. “But I may be having contractions.”
“Oh dear, do you need us to call an ambulance?”
“No. No, I’m sure it’s fine. Thank you though.” you grabbed your groceries and took them out to the car.
You sat down inside the car and cursed. These were not Braxton Hicks. They were too powerful to be fake. You were actually going into labor. You were going to give birth today. And Sylus wasn’t fucking here!
“Oh he is going to kill me.” you started the car. You were only a short distance from the hospital so it didn’t make sense to call for an ambulance or anything like that.
As you were driving over you got another contraction. The time between them felt like they got a lot shorter. You cursed and hit the call button on the car. “Call Sylus.” you said.
There was a single ring before Sylus picked up. “Hello sweetie, what are--”
“The babies are coming.” you cut him off.
“Are you serious?” his light tone immediately sobered up.
“Yes. I started having contractions and I’m on my way to the hospital now.”
“Okay. I’m leaving now I’ll be there as soon as possible.” you heard someone in the background say something followed by a single gun shot. “Tell Luke and Kieran to get you there safely and--”
“Actually I’m driving myself. I left Luke and Keiran back at the mansion.” you winced.
“You--” he sighed. “Right. Fine. Be careful. I’ll be there soon. Try not to give birth until I get there.”
“I’ll do my best. Sorry for making you leave. If I hadn’t insisted--”
“You thought you had more time before the babies were coming. It’s alright, kitten. I’ll see you soon, I love you.”
“Love you too.” you hung up as you pulled into the hospital.
You were immediately taken back to a room and changed into a hospital gown. Thankfully the doctor said that you were still a ways off from being ready to deliver so Sylus had time to get over but it didn’t make the experience any less frustrating. You were in pain, you were alone, and you were also really hungry but the doctor said you couldn’t have anything other than like ice chips since you were birthing twins.
You were laid up in bed, your water had broken an hour ago and your body was getting steadily closer to being ready to deliver. The doctor had just checked how far you were dilated and you were still not at the ten centimeters you needed to be but you were getting close.
“Girls, you gotta listen to mommy.” you told your stomach, “You have to wait until your dad gets here to come out, alright? Please just hold on until your dad gets here. Please. He’ll be heartbroken if he misses this.”
Just as you were saying that the door to your room burst open and Sylus scanned the room before his eyes landed on you. “It hasn’t happened yet, has it? I didn’t miss it.” he asked.
“No. You’re just in time.” relieved tears started streaming down your face. Sylus came up and kissed you.
“Sorry for taking so long, I got here as fast as I could. Are you alright?”
“Outside of the fact that my body is preparing to push two babies out of my vagina, I’m doing pretty good now that you’re here.” you pressed your sweaty face to his arm. “Can you clean up first though? You’re kinda covered in blood.”
“Shit.” he cursed and went to the bathroom to wash the spatter of blood off of him.
The labor was long and painful but with Sylus by your side it made the pain bearable. You were glad he was so strong considering anyone lesser may have had their hand broken by how hard you were squeezing. It was the greatest joy and relief when the screams of babies filled the air in the delivery room.
“And there they are, two perfectly healthy baby girls.” the doctor and nurses wiped them off and Sylus cut the umbilical cords. Once the babies were clean they handed them off to you. Their cries quieted down in your arms.
“Hi babies,” you sniffed, trying to catch your breath. “You are the most precious things in all of creation.”
“They are absolutely perfect.” Sylus stroked one of their downy heads. Tears were falling from his eyes. You rarely ever saw Sylus cry but the birth of your daughters was a more than worthwhile excuse to let go. You yourself had been crying since you started pushing.
“The new little loves of my life,” Sylus said, bending closer to kiss the babies and you on top of your heads. “You will want for nothing.”
“Don’t go spoiling them rotten already, they literally just came out of me.”
“I can’t help it. They are my little princesses, they deserve to be treated as such.” he turned to you, “And you did such a good job, sweetie. How are you feeling?”
“Exhausted, but happy.” you nuzzled your face against one of the twin’s heads. “We’re parents now.”
“That we are. Now we can plan the wedding and get started on having even more kids.”
“For goodness sake, the babies aren’t even an hour old yet and you’re already talking about pumping me full of more? Give me some time to breathe at least.”
“Right. I know.” he sighed, taking one of the twins into his arms. “This has been the best day of my life and all I want is for it to keep going on forever.”
“But now the best part comes, taking them home.”
~~~
The first couple of weeks were the most chaotic with the new babies in the house. The day you brought them home you introduced them to Luke and Kieran who started bawling over them. It was actually really sweet. Sylus had even introduced Mephisto to the babies.
“These two are your number one priority from now on, Mephisto.” he had told the bird. “Watch them like a hawk.”
Mephisto squawked indignantly at being compared to another bird but followed diligently when you took the twins back to the nursery.
One evening you woke up in the middle of the night. Ever since the twins had been born your sleep schedule had been messed up and getting through the entire night in one go was hard. You sat up and noticed that Sylus wasn’t in bed. That wasn’t so strange since he did a lot of business at night but he had said he was refraining from deals and auctions until the babies were a bit older.
So where was he?
You got up and shuffled down the hall. Sure enough, he was in the nursery laid back in the recliner, both the babies fast asleep on his chest.
You waved at him and he gave a small nod of his head to show he saw you. You crept closer, careful not to make any noise. “Were they fussing?” you whispered as quietly as you could, not wanting to wake the girls.
“A little.” he whispered back. “But I sang them a lullaby and they went right back to sleep.”
The fact that Sylus’s tone deaf lullabies actually worked to soothe the girls back to sleep was baffling and infuriating. “You need some help getting them back in the crib?”
“No. They’re fine just like this. I’ll move them back to the crib when I’m sure they’re not going to wake up again.” he said.
“Meaning you just want to stay cuddling with them.”
“Also yes.”
“Well, I’m going to go abc to bed. Don’t stay in here all night, okay?”
“I won’t.” he said but you knew it was a lie. He’d move in here just to be that much closer to them every hour of the day.
~~~
As time passed and the twins grew life evened out. There were many late nights soothing their cries and days spent changing dirty diapers and teaching them how to sit up and crawl. Sylus spent as much time with them as he possibly could. It almost made you jealous seeing how absolutely obsessed he was with your daughters. But seeing him taking care of and playing with them only made your heart swell with affection. He was such a good dad.
Right now Sylus wasn’t around though. Right now, the girls sat with you in your bridal suite, dressed in their little flower girl dresses while you got dressed in your wedding gown.
“So, girls, how do I look?” you turned to the twins who burbled and tugged on their little tulle skirts. “Lyra, Opal, please. Can you look at mommy?” Typical of six month old babies, they continued to ignore you.
“Alright, time for first look with daddy. You girls ready?” you asked the twins. They kinda just looked around, not really understanding anything you were saying but they weren’t fussing or crying so you took it as a win. “Great! Let’s go show him how pretty we all look.”
You placed the twins in the little wagon that had been decorated to match the wedding decor and pulled them behind you out of the suite.
The photographer was going to do your first look first and then bring in the girls. You saw Sylus at the end of the hallway, haloed by afternoon light and wearing a crisp handsome suit. His hands were behind his back, fidgeting slightly as he waited. You could see him tense up when he heard you approaching.
You deliberately slowed your steps just to tease him a little more before tapping his shoulder. He turned around, tears already misting his eyes as he took you in. “You look…breathtaking. I actually get to marry this angelic woman?”
“You look very handsome as well. The suit is crisp.” you smoothed out his tie.
“Can I kiss you or would that ruin your makeup?”
“If it smudges I’ll fix it.” you wrapped your arms around him as he kissed you passionately. You pulled back with wide matching smiles. “You want to see the girls?”
“Yes. Where are our little princesses?” his eyes lighted even more.
You turned around and motioned for the staff to wheel your babies over. “Oh there are the rest of my girls.” Sylus said, stooping down and hoisting either child on his hips. “You look so pretty in your little dresses. My precious little flowers.”
“Look at the little booties they have on. Isn’t that the most precious thing you’ve ever seen?” you wiggled one of their feet to their tiny sparkly shoes.
“They look every bit as beautiful and perfect as their mother.” he kissed both their heads. “To think, that after today I not only get to wake up to these two every morning but next to my wife as well.”
You stood there, watching your soon to be husband coo and fawn over your daughters as they giggled and tugged on their father’s expensive new suit. This was everything you had ever dreamt of having. It wasn’t a dream though. It was real. This beautiful life you were living was all yours. You glanced down in the wagon and saw a pair of hearts plushie that you had won at a claw machine over a year ago nestled inside. It had been wore down by the twins in recent months but seeing it, even with its stains and slightly misshapen stuffing filled you with joy.
You looked back at Sylus and the girls. Even all this time later you could remember what brought on this beautiful life. Two little cuties together are definitely twice as adorable. And you knew it was true.
“Ready to go get married?” you asked Sylus, taking one of the girls from him.
He smiled, taking your free hand. “As ready as I have ever been.”
#love and deepspace#lads sylus#lads mc#sylus x reader#sylus x mc#this is my most self indulgent fic ever!#I literally had to force myself to write an ending and not just let it continue on forever
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Random se-mi hcs (no game au)
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﹒ ૮꒰◞ ◟ ꒱ა ⸝ new upload! ❜
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⸝⸝ ◦ tags: regular gay se-mi glaze, facial piercings, smutty parts, hair pulling, mentions of smoking, fictional death, reader and se-mi are switches during freaky time, female reader intended, brat tamer
⸝⸝ ◦ a/n: hey chat i don’t really know what people out here uhhhhh im gay ok yeah let’s get start
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SFW
she likes listening to chase alantic to give her a ego boost after something really embarrassing happens or she breaks up with someone
she owns over 30 hoodies and justifies it as “i just run cold…! why are you judging me?”
she owns a nintendo and plays animal crossing (her favorite character is coco or wolfgang) i feel like she has a toxic relationship with fortnite (im NOT projecting..) like she hates it but she just continues to go back. “one more game”
if she’d ever play stardew valley, she would marry abigail (IFYKYK)
she likes plants and flowers and her favorite flower is a hyacinth
whenever some makes her mad secretly, in the middle of the night will boot up sims, make a sim that looks like the person and kill them. (she prefers drowning BUT lighting fires is also a good choice)
she HATES the people who uses the strawberry poundcake body mist excessively. it makes her get a headache and her nose gets all tingly
she likes cooking but she’s impatient and bluntly sucks at it. if she’s cooking at someone’s house they would probably say “what is burning?”
romantic but sucks at being romantic, please help this girl :(
gets her nails painted, or she does them herself. she really likes burgundy and black so she would do those colors :-)
she owns over 10 chokers that look the same but are for different occasions
ok the time you FREAKS have been waiting for
smokes, but only when she’s stressed
NSFW
definitely talks you through it, but more degrading words than anything.
remember that tongue piercing that i said he has in my last blog? yeah, she uses that to arouse you even more whine she’s EATING you out.
slurps ever single drop of cum after she’s done
adores your tits, and also convinced you to get pierced, now they are even more sensitive for her to play and fondle with while you’re fucking her brains out, or the opposite, while she has her strap on, she loves to see them bounce around, usually letting you get on top of her.
when she’s doming, she is mostly gentle, but she will continue to get rougher and rougher. if she hasn’t made you a crying, whimpering, and shaking mess than she hasn’t done her job correctly.
her favorite position is definitely doggystyle or missionary while she’s doming you
she LOVES shower sex. like completely adores it.
she definitely owns a 8 inch black strap and dicks you DOWNNNNN with it. can’t prove me other wise…
now while your doming HER, she could be a blushing, squirming mess,
you’re even more of a brat while your doming her and it pisses her off SO much…
you grab her choker while your rubbing your clit against hers
while you’re eating your DELICIOUS meal (her punani) you occasionally stick a few fingers in, 4 max and it makes her go INSANE. makes her cum instantly all over your face
when she’s giving you the MEANEST most DEEP backshots, she likes to pull your hair and smack your ass. a little too much but it’s ok because it’s se-mi :-)
#se mi x reader#squid game 2#se mi squid game#squid game smut#squid game x y/n#se mi smut#lesbian#lgbtqia#player 380#se mi
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Better Half
“Hey- the Colonel’s hungry. Get him a sandwich or something. Better yet, make it a steak dinner. Actually, make it two.”
You barked orders to a passerby and the confused but obedient soldier threw out a quick salute in response before scurrying away to do your bidding. By now, he knew better than to question you (they all did); it was common knowledge that any command you gave, no matter how bizarre or seemingly random, was to be followed immediately if one wanted to avoid risking your wrath. Even Caleb was only half immune to this rule.
Once, you advised him to flank the left side of the enemy and he’d flanked the right instead. Besides the ground sliding out from beneath him because the right sight of the field had softened significantly more than the left due to recent weather conditions, he also had to suffer the consequences of your cold shoulder for the next week. Now he only disregarded you when he wanted to tease you; he’d never risk doing it out on the field again. You were many things, but you were almost never wrong when it came to battle strategy and that made you invaluable to him. At least, that’s what made you invaluable to him at first. As time went by, you became so much more to him than just sound advice.
You turned to face your superior only to see him attempting to stifle his snickers with a gloved hand. “Did I say something funny, Colonel?”
He attempted to clear his throat but it was to no avail. The slight shake in his shoulders gave him away. “It’s nothing- at ease, soldier.”
You stared at him, unamused.
Realizing it was futile, he finally let himself laugh aloud. “The Colonel is hungry, huh? Last time I checked, I was the Colonel. And I’m not hungry.”
You crossed your arms stubbornly. “You’ll be hungry soon; you always eat around this time anyway. And besides, I’m hungry.”
He smirked. “Are you telling me you’re throwing my name around just to get yourself a free dinner? Tell me, my oh-so-lovely-adjutant, does that sound like abuse of power to you?”
“Nope. Like I said, you’re going to get hungry here soon anyway.”
“Am not.”
“Are too.”
His stomach growled right on cue.
You raised a brow at him as if to say “I told you so.”
He laughed again, holding his hands up in surrender. “Fine, fine. Who knew you had my eating schedule all memorized?” He nudged you playfully with his elbow and you couldn’t help but relax slightly at his familiar touch, biting back a smile.
You knew he was supposed to be your boss, but he’d always made you feel more like equals than anything else. You were always the first person he greeted when he walked into work, and you were the only person he bid farewell to when he left. He kept you at his side almost constantly, seeking advice when he needed it, or simply company when he wanted it. This line of work could be gruesome at times, but somehow he felt that life was a little less gray when you were there to make him laugh.
Sometimes you’d pretend you were the only one who could make him open up like this. If anyone had seen the two of you at work, they would’ve agreed. To anyone else in the Farspace Fleet, he was the Colonel- calm, cool, collected. To you, he was Caleb- silly, stubborn, sensitive. Sometimes you’d even pretend he was your Caleb. But then you’d see that damn necklace around his neck and that familiar pain would trickle back into your chest like a poison seeping into your veins.
He wasn’t yours. He was never yours. He was… hers.
Every time he left for Linkon, every time he gave you that mock salute before grinning widely and telling you to “hold down the fort” until his return, every time he waved at you as he boarded the train, you felt your heart sink more and more. You wondered if maybe one of these days, he just wouldn’t come back. If maybe he’d run off with her, marry her. And then he’d forget all about you.
It wasn’t until he bounded off the train with a souvenir in hand for you ( he got you one every single time, without fail, whether he was gone for a day or a week), that you felt you could breathe again. It wasn’t until he was in the passenger seat of your car, letting you drive him home, listening to an album you’d both discovered together, that you felt you could relax again. It wasn’t until he was making you dinner in his home, the way he always did as thanks for picking him up, that you felt you could finally forget about her for a moment.
But it didn’t help that he always wore that damn thing everywhere he went. Even now, as you waited for the soldier to bring you and Caleb dinner, you couldn’t help but glare at the stupid hunk of metal. What an ugly design- she couldn’t have picked something more classy? It was the most unrefined thing he owned; you were sure you would’ve picked something more suited to him had you been given the chance. But you knew he’d never give you the chance.
Without meaning to, you let out a small sigh as you sank into your desk beside him.
“I don’t plan to return to Linkon anytime soon.”
You froze in your chair. Had he really caught on that quickly? You must not have been as subtle as you’d thought. “What do you mean?” You asked nonchalantly.
“That sigh. You always sigh like that whenever I say I’m going to Linkon. Well, I have no intention of making any visits in the near future.”
You had only meant to glance over at him briefly but when your eyes met his, you found it impossible to look away. You reminded yourself to breathe. “You’re not? How come?”
“No reason to.” He shrugged.
Bullshit. He had a reason. He had a good fucking reason and you hated it. You hated her. Without ever knowing her personally, without ever meaning to, you’d begun to hate her for the simple act of having him. “Oh really? No one to visit?” You asked innocently.
He chuckled. “Just say it if you’re gonna think it.”
“Think what?”
He raised a brow at you. “Really? We’re gonna play that game? Fine, I’m good at games. What should we play, 21 questions? Shall I guess what’s bothering you?” He moved to pinch your cheek and laughed when you swatted him away.
You could tell he was about to press the issue so you were grateful when the soldier finally returned with your meals. “Eat.” You commanded Caleb.
He saluted you. “Yes, ma’am.”
You ate in silence, but you could feel him sneaking glances at you. You didn’t dare reciprocate the eye contact for fear you’d never be able to look away.
“Hey.” The sudden solemnity in his voice surprised you.
“What is it?” You picked at your food some more as you waited for him to speak.
“Would you say I’m… needed?” His voice cracked slightly.
Well now you had to look at him. Just what on earth was going on in his head? You were just talking about Linkon, and now he was breaking out some existential philosophy? “Needed as in what?”
He winced. “Never mind.”
“No, I’m serious. As in what? As in the Farspace Fleet’s Colonel? Or as in Caleb?”
He picked at the edge of his desk. “I dunno. Both, I guess.”
“Honestly?”
He hesitated and then nodded slowly.
“The Farspace Fleet has never been more impressive in its entire history than it’s been under your command. But does it need you? No. So if you wanted to do something else, be something else, you could. You could do anything you wanted.”
“And… Caleb?”
You smiled warmly. “I’ll always need Caleb. He owes me a date, by the way; if you see him, tell him he’s not allowed to bail on me like he did last time; concert tickets are nonrefundable and expensive, and his oh-so-lovely-adjutant doesn’t make as much money as he does.”
He cracked a smile. “Caleb doesn’t get a break even when he’s sick, huh? Alright, I’ll be sure to tell him. No one messes with the Colonel’s adjutant, after all.”
And just like that, you were back to normal.
“He really did bring us steak dinners,” Caleb laughed as he cut up his food.
“I said steak, didn’t I? You should know better than anyone there’s consequences when you don’t listen to me.” You wagged your finger at him in warning and it only made him laugh harder.
“When I brought you on as my adjutant, I didn’t think I’d be hiring a comedian as well. Tell me- do you play venues or am I the sole viewer of your comedy act?” He teased.
“Neither. Both would imply I’m getting paid to be funny and unfortunately I am not. Unless you’d like to add my humor to your bill.” You winked at him.
He shook his head, grinning. “Unfortunately, my dear, I don’t think the Farspace Fleet can afford such quality humor. Will you accept payment in Caleb’s homemade dinners instead?”
Your eyes lit up. “Absolutely! Tastes better than this shit anyway.” You gestured to the food before you.
He chuckled. “You’re the one who made a big deal out of requesting it and now you don’t like it? So hard to please.”
“This steak is so well done, you’d think a crematory cooked it. I like Caleb’s medium rare steak much better.” You made a point out of chomping aggressively on the chewy hunk of meat.
He shook his head, grinning. Then he glanced down and began to poke the food around his plate, and you knew it was time to ask.
“So why wouldn’t you be needed?”
He choked on his water. “Wh-what?”
“You asked if you were needed and it was right after we were talking about your visits to Linkon. Did something happen?” You knew this was a sensitive topic, but you also knew him. He’d beat around the bush until the day he died. He’d tell you a million things, but never how he felt. He’d allude to it, dance around it, but never outright say it. Not unless you dragged it out of him.
“Not… not really.” He cleared his throat and continued to jab at his food with his fork. There it was. The famous Caleb avoidance tactic.
“You get into a fight with her or something?”
He bit his lip. “Nothing gets by you, huh? Yeah… something like that.”
“Nuh-uh. You’re not doing that shit with me, Caleb. She might let you get away with it, but I won’t. You know damn well I won’t. Come on- spill.” You demanded.
He gave you a sheepish look. “I’m fine, really.”
“You start getting all existential on me about if you’re needed and then you tell me you’re fine? You think I don’t know you any better?” You were starting to get annoyed, but you took a deep breath, trying to be patient with him. You knew this was hard for him. “It’s me, silly. I won’t tell anyone. Hell, I didn’t even tell anyone you cried during that dog movie.”
He snorted. “It died! It’s not my fault I cried. They make those movies specifically so you cry.”
You laughed and nudged him with your elbow. “So, if I can keep a secret about the all powerful Colonel of the Farspace Fleet blubbering like a baby, I can surely listen to you rant about your girl for one minute. C’mon. Let loose.”
He hesitated but then he gave in the way he always did when you persisted like this. “She… she said she didn’t need me anymore. She said she could take care of herself. She didn’t like the way I’ve been ‘acting’ now that I’m Colonel. I was just… I was just trying to protect her the… the only way I know how.” His fork clattered onto the plate as pain flashed across his eyes. “Anyway, point is, she doesn’t want me around anymore. So I’m… I’m here.”
Your brow twitched. “I’m sorry- the fuck does she mean she doesn’t need you? What, she thinks she’s all grown now and doesn’t need anybody? Even adults need to lean on each other sometimes, getting older doesn’t mean you stop relying on others. She’s too immature; only immature people go around claiming that they’ve ‘matured’ and don’t need help anymore. I’m telling you Caleb, I’ve been telling you, you seriously need someone older.” You paused to see how he was taking your ranting. He only listened in silence.
You set a hand on top of his and very gently said, “I could blow up her house if you wanted.”
That made him smile a little. “You know that’s not what I want. But I appreciate the offer.”
“I know, I know. You’re too good to people sometimes, Caleb. I think between the two of us, I’m the meaner one. I’d march right up to her -if you’d let me- and tell her exactly what I thought of her bullshit.”
He shook his head. “I don’t think that’s entirely accurate. You’re definitely the better one out of the two of us. You don’t… you don’t know the things that I’ve…”
“What- the things that you’ve done? Honey, I’m your partner in crime. The things you’ve done, I’ve done them with you.”
“But you don’t know what I… what I tried to do to her.” He admitted weakly.
“So lay it on me. What’s so scary that you think you can’t tell me?”
“I told her-” He swallowed, eyes darting away from yours. “That I’d lock her up to keep her safe. That it’d be safer for her by my side.”
“And?”
His eyes flicked back up to yours, wondering if he misheard you. “What do you mean, and?”
“And what else? Was that it?”
He huffed slightly, but there was no annoyance in his voice. “Of course you would think that’s fine.”
“But you’re right though. There is no safer place in the world than by your side. Besides the fact that you’ve got the coolest superpower in the world (seriously- it’s such a cheat), and that you’re a great fighter, you also just have the sway that comes with being the Colonel. She’d be an idiot to not realize that. Yeah, sure, you could’ve maybe worded the whole ‘lock you up’ thing better, but it’s like you said; you were only doing the best you could in the only way you knew how. I wouldn’t fault you for that.”
He stared at you for a moment. “You’re crazy, you know that?”
You gave him a wink. “Absolutely batshit, thank you.”
He laughed. “How is it that you always know how to make me feel better?”
“Umm, maybe because I’m the best adjutant in the world and you should pay me more?” You teased, nudging him again.
He snorted. “You wish. But seriously. Thanks. I needed that.”
You nodded. “Now, let’s go get drunk and talk about how much women suck. I’ll buy.”
He raised an eyebrow, amused. “But… you’re a woman. And you don’t drink. And you’re broke.”
You shrugged. “But my best friend drinks and he looks like he could use a drink and a good, old ranting session. And again, if you just paid me more, I wouldn’t be so broke.” You grinned unabashedly.
He took in the sight of your grin and couldn’t help but smile himself. You always had the brightest of smiles. It was damn near impossible to be upset around you.
The two of you soon found your way to a bar; Caleb specifically picked one near his house because he was sure he’d have to carry you home drunk. You insisted that you weren’t that much of a lightweight and even proposed a drinking competition but by the time you’d gotten one and a half drinks in, you were already dozing off in his arms. He chuckled as he gazed down at you fondly. Signaling to the bartender to close out his tab, he scooped you up in his arms and walked you to his house.
When he got inside, he laid you on his bed and simply watched you for a moment. He was tempted to crawl up beside you, as he was sure you wouldn’t mind, but then he thought better of it. He’d sleep on the couch instead. He turned to leave, but then decided instead to bend down and kiss the top of your head before whispering, “Thanks again for tonight. I had fun.”
He began to pull away, but before he could get too far, you latched onto him in your sleep and yanked him into bed beside you. He tensed up, unsure of what to do in this situation, but the sound of your even, happy breathing made his heart lurch in his chest. He could listen to it all night. He probably would be listening to it all night, because he wasn’t sure he could sleep with how tightly you were clinging to him. Did you even know what you were doing?
“Caleb…” You murmured in your sleep, nuzzling even closer to him.
He covered his mouth to stifle his chuckle. Yeah, you totally knew what you were doing. What was he going to do with you?
He brushed your hair to the side gently, wanting to get a better look at your slumbering face. You were adorable, there was no other way to put it. He wasn’t sure why he was thinking these things, as he was sure he would never dare to in broad daylight, but somehow, as you dozed off beside him, your perfume soaking into his shirt, he couldn’t help but enjoy it. Enjoy you.
He wondered if things could’ve been different, if you would’ve been the only one in his heart and in his bed like this, had he grown up in Skyhaven like you had. Would you have gone to school together? Would you have sat beside him? Would you have had lunch with him? Would he have had the nerve to ask you to the prom? He shook his head, laughing softly to himself. Probably not. He was plenty outgoing, but a pretty girl like you? He’d choke over his own words. It seemed he never had enough nerve when it came to matters of the heart. All he ever did was hold back how he was feeling and what he was thinking. But not… not with you.
His brows furrowed suddenly at the realization. Did he have a single secret from you? He swore he only had the one, and you’d just coaxed it out of him only hours ago. Now that he thought about it, you were the only person who truly knew him. The only one he shared everything with. Of course, he had someone he loved, someone he’d loved his whole life, but even she didn’t know all of his secrets. You were the only one he told them to. You were the… the only one he wanted to tell them to.
He tensed up again. How could he let this happen? This couldn’t happen. Besides the fact that he was already in love with someone, he shouldn’t have been sharing so much with one person anyway. You could betray him, you could leave him, or even worse, you could hate him. One day, he could share too much, and you would never look at him the same way again. And he couldn’t stand that.
Carefully, he pulled your arms off of him and made his way to the living room. He stared at the ceiling until sleep eventually took him.
In the morning, he woke up with a blanket around him. He blinked, still groggy from sleep. He hadn’t remembered to grab himself a blanket, where did it…
Suddenly he heard the soft sound of an inhale and an exhale, then another inhale and exhale. He quickly turned on his side. There you were, sleeping on the floor. You’d given him the blanket he’d had on his bed. He pinched the bridge of his nose, frustrated. What the hell were you doing? Why were you on the floor? Didn’t he leave you in the bedroom? How long had you been here? He hoped to god you hadn’t been here long, otherwise you might get a cold from the lack of a blanket. He quickly scooped you up in his arms, attempting to settle you on the couch where he had previously been laying, so that he could wrap you up in the blanket, but you slowly began to stir.
“C-Caleb? What’re you-” You rubbed your eyes. “What’re you doin?”
He sighed. “What am I doing? What are you doing, why were you sleeping on the floor when I clearly put you on the bed, huh?”
You gave him a sleepy smile. “That’s an easy one. Cuz it’s your house. You should get the bed, silly. I tried to wake you up to get you to come to bed, but you were knocked out. Was like talking to a pile of bricks. So I brought you the blanket and slept on the floor.” You said it as though it were the simplest thing in the world.
He groaned. “You dork, I put you on the bed on purpose. How long have you been sleeping out here with no blanket on?”
“I dunno… couple hours?” You sat up slowly.
He rested his hand on your forehead, brow creased with concern.
“Watcha doin?”
“Making sure you’re not sick or something, cuz you slept in the cold like a dumbass.”
You grinned. “And? What’s my diagnosis, doc?”
“You’re not sick; you’re just stupid.” He flicked you in the forehead.
You laughed. “Good morning to you too, Cap’n Cranky.”
“Morning, goofball. I said I owe you one of Caleb’s homemade meals, right? How ‘bout I make you breakfast? I’ll make it nice and warm to make up for you sleepin in the cold.”
You straightened in excitement, nodding your head enthusiastically.
He cracked a smile and then got to work cooking.
No matter how many times you’d watched Caleb cook, you never got tired of it. You loved the way he expertly diced his vegetables, the way every cube was the same size. You loved the way he flicked his wrist out and flipped the pan. You loved the way he’d dip a pinky into the sauce to taste its flavor. You loved the way he hummed to himself when he got really into it. You loved everything about him.
“You know, I think I just might be your biggest fan, Chef Caleb.” You called out.
He grinned. “Only cuz I bribe you with my food. You wouldn’t like me so much if I didn’t feed you.”
“Hey- that’s not true. I’d like you no matter what.” You declared.
You might’ve imagined it, but you swore you saw him hesitate for a moment.
“Caleb?”
He blinked and his smile returned. “Sorry, spaced out.”
You stared at him carefully.
He sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck, avoiding your gaze. “What? Why’re you staring?”
“Caleb, it’s too early to be doing this.”
“Doing what?” He asked innocently as he stirred the pot.
“To be hiding things. You know you can’t hide things from me, you have a terrible poker face.”
“Hey- I have a great poker face, I’ll have you know.” He said, putting a hand over his chest in mock offense.
“Says the guy who is trying to avoid the topic by continuing to talk about poker faces.” You retorted.
He sighed and turned the stove off. “Fine, fine. I should know better by now, nothing gets past you. I was just… I was just thinking last night about some things.”
You sighed. “Caleb. You’re going to have to elaborate on ‘some things.””
“I know, I’m getting there. It’s just… do you think… there would ever be a day when you don’t like me anymore?” He asked quietly.
You snorted. “Nope. Never.”
“But what if… what if I did something really bad? What if I hurt you?”
“I’d forgive you.”
“But what if I hurt someone you care about?”
“You’re the only person I care about.”
“But what if-”
“Caleb, where is this all coming from? What’s going on? Don’t you trust me?” You cut him off suddenly. You could tell he was starting to spiral.
He winced. “I do… it’s just… sometimes I think I’m not cut out to have any sort of close relationship with anyone. My… my hands are far too stained with blood and I-”
“Well, if I stain my hands right beside you, who’s to say whose blood it is?”
His eyes widened. “Wh-what?”
“I’m saying, I’ll hold your hand no matter what. I’ll stand by you no matter what. I don’t care what you do, I don’t care what you’ve done, I don’t care what you’re going to do. You’re stuck with me. If you’re in it, I’m in it too.”
He let out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding.
You walked over to him and wrapped your arms around him, enveloping him in a tight hug. “You dork, is this why you left the bed last night?”
He tensed up. “You… you knew I was lying with you?”
“Yeah and you were warm and then you left and it was cold. So it’s your fault if I get sick.”
“I just said you weren’t sick,” He grumbled, but a smile tugged at the corners of his lips.
“Don’t bottle your feelings up again, okay? Just tell me if you’re feeling down. I don’t care if I’m asleep, I don’t care if I’m mid-shit, I will drop anything and everything for you.”
“Well I definitely wouldn’t interrupt you if you were mid-shit,” He laughed. “But I will keep that in mind… thanks. I really do appreciate it. You… you have no idea what it means to me to know that you’re there for me.”
“I’ll always be here for you. And my offer still stands; I will totally blow up her house if you ever want me to. I never liked her anyway.”
He shook his head, chuckling. “What’s with you and explosions? I really will have to keep you in line, won’t I?”
“Keep me in line? Who’s the one who flanked right when I said left and went down the hill in a landslide?” You raised a brow at him.
He groaned, palming his face with a hand. “I said I was sorry, how many times you gonna keep bringing that up?”
“As many times as it takes for you to know that I’m always right.”
“Yeah, yeah- you’re always right, eat your damn breakfast.” He laughed as he shoved a bowl of food at you and directed you to his dining room. Then he slid into a chair beside you, nudging you gently with his arm.
The two of you ate in silence but it was a comfortable silence. The kind you can relax in when you know the other person is waiting for you on the other side of that silence. The kind you can only enjoy when you truly cherish the company you have.
“This is nice; I should bother you for breakfast more.”
He let out a breathy laugh. “Is that right? What should I charge you for in return?”
“Is my undying attention not enough?”
“Undying attention is pretty good. But my home cooked meals are a hefty price. How about your undying attention and no more secrets between the two of us?”
You stared at him curiously. “We already have no secrets.”
“I think we have a grand total of one.”
“One? That’s one I’ve never heard of.”
“You still haven’t told me why you get upset every time I go to Linkon.”
You choked on your porridge. “Upset? I don’t get upset. The weather is just terrible there and I don’t want you to get sick.”
He raised a brow at you. “Now who’s got a bad poker face?”
“I think we should have no secrets except for my one. It’ll be the only exception. And then no secrets after that.” You mumbled in between bites. You were now feeling the need to stuff your cheeks so full that it was physically impossible to answer him. God, your behavior was ridiculous, and you knew it was, but you couldn’t help yourself. How was it that you could control an entire fleet and yet you couldn’t control your own feelings? You weren’t even sure you could control your face right now. You were sure your cheeks were as red as the sunrise.
“What’s so big a deal about your one secret? I told you I was willing to lock someone up for the rest of their life, and your secret is worse than that?”
You nodded quickly. “Oh my god, so much worse.”
He crossed his arms, unconvinced.
“You’ll honestly never look at me the same way again, I think it’s probably for the best if we keep this one under wraps.” You said weakly. You didn’t dare to look him in the eye.
“You said you’d like me no matter what. Well, I’m the same way with you. I’ll like you no matter what.”
“That’s-” You cleared your throat. “Kinda the issue.” You mumbled under your breath.
He tilted his head towards you, straining to hear your last words. “What did you say?”
“I said I need a tissue. Too much porridge. Messy stuff.” For good measure, you let some of it drip down your lip, shrugging your shoulders as if to say “What can you do?”
He rolled his eyes before grabbing a napkin. You thought he’d just hand it to you but instead he gently wiped the porridge from your face. His fingers brushed against your lips once. Then twice. Then again.
“Um… I think you got it.” You blushed.
“How long are we going to keep doing this?” He murmured, eyes fixed on the fingers that were still caressing your lips.
You swallowed. “Doing what?”
“Pretending.”
Your eyes widened and you pulled away suddenly, standing up straight instead. “Anyway-I-think-everything-is-going-to-work-out-great-your-girl-will-be-over-herself-in-no-time-at-all-and-you’ll-be-back-in-Linkon-before-you-know-it-okay-great-talk-I’m-gonna-go-wash-my-dishes-now-thank-you-so-much-for-the-meal.” You blurted out hurriedly before escaping to the kitchen.
“This is my house, you know. You can’t run and hide from me!” He called from the dining room, his voice getting louder as he made his way towards you.
“Not hiding!” You called back.
“Bullshit.” His arms wrapped around your waist, turning you to face him. He backed you against the kitchen counter. “Tell me the truth.”
You flinched. “I can’t.”
“You can, you just won’t. But if you’re gonna go and bottle up your feelings, then I can too, right?” His voice dropped to a low tone, almost like he was threatening you with his own feelings.
You sighed. “Fine. Fine, no secrets. But just… could you turn around and look the other way? I can’t say it when you’re looking at me like that.”
“No- you made me spill my guts to your face yesterday. It’s only fair you do the same.”
“Caleb!” You whined.
“No. Come on. Just tell me. I promise that whatever it is, it won’t make me think any less of you.”
You pinched the bridge of your nose in frustration. “Alright. Okay. Fine. I’m in love with you. There. Happy?”
“Immensely.”
Without another word, he kissed you.
Your whole body froze. What? What was going on? Oh. You had to still be sleeping. That had to be it. There was no way he was actually kissing you. He was still in love with what's-her-face. There was no way he was-
His tongue slid into your mouth.
Your eyes squeezed shut as a whimper tumbled past your lips. Oh god, he was actually kissing you. And he tasted good. Kinda like porridge. But good. Oh god, why was he kissing you? Did you even care? Wait, yes, you very much did care. You very much did not want to be a rebound. No way in hell. You’d rather be in the friend zone than the rebound zone. God no.
You quickly pulled away from him, gasping for breath.
“Did you not like it?” He asked, eyes looking slightly hurt as they skimmed over you, trying to find an answer.
“Ha… did I like it? Of course I liked it.” You grumbled under your breath, still looking away from him.
“So then why-”
“Because I’m not her. I’m not sure if you realize that.” You’d snapped and you hadn’t meant to snap. Oh fuck, you really hadn’t meant to snap.
You heard him exhale a shaky breath.
Oh no. No, you really weren’t trying to hurt him. You immediately turned to reach for him.
“Ha. Got you to look at me.” He smirked.
Oh, you bastard. You scoffed and flicked him in the forehead. “Jackass. Why are you acting all hurt?”
He leaned in towards you, grinning. “Why are you acting all sensitive? Aren’t you in love with me? Usually, people wanna kiss the person they’re in love with; I mean, I get that you’re new at this love thing-” He teased.
You pinched his cheeks, interrupting his speech. “Yeah, yeah. You’re being a pain in my ass right now, you know that? And besides, I refuse to be your rebound, so maybe you should be careful who you go around kissing.”
His grin faded. “What do you mean? It’s not like I’m going around town kissing people. Just you. You’re the only one I want to kiss.”
You raised a brow at him, unconvinced. “You were just in love with someone else, only moments ago.”
“Hey, that was yesterday. I’m a whole new me today.” He attempted to joke lightheartedly but he couldn’t help the feeling of heaviness that had begun to settle in his chest. You didn’t believe him. Of course you didn’t believe him. He didn’t blame you, but it still hurt.
“Caleb- you were in love with her for years. That doesn’t just go away. I’m not gonna be the bandaid on a gaping wound.”
His expression grew serious and he straightened. “I know. I don’t expect you to be. But I think… I think we’ve been done for a while now. I just didn’t want to accept it. I was always… changing myself to be whatever I thought she’d like. When I finally got comfortable enough to show her who I really was… well, you know how that went. But you…you’re the only person who sees me and loves me anyway.”
“So what? Doesn’t mean you love me back.” It killed you to say the words, but it was true nonetheless. As badly as you wanted to be his, as badly as you wanted him to kiss you nonsensically until you forgot all rationale, until you forgot your own name, until you forgot what day it was, as badly as you wanted him to cuddle you to sleep, to be there when you woke in the morning, you didn’t want it if he didn’t want it. He’d had enough of pretending in his life; he didn’t need to pretend to love you back just to appease you. It’s not like you would quit your job if he rejected you. You’d already stayed by his side regardless of your feelings and his lack of return on them. You didn’t want to be just one more person he had to change for.
“No, you’re right. It doesn’t mean that. But I do love you, regardless. Love is a choice; I choose you.” He said it so simply. Like he was reciting a book, like he was just stating a fact.
“But what if I don’t want you to choose me just because I’m the only one who understands you? If someone else comes along who understands you just as well as I do, will you want them instead?”
He shook his head. “I’m not choosing you because you’re the only one who understands me. I’m choosing you because you’re the only one I want to understand me. You’re the only one who makes me laugh every damn day, the only one I want to laugh with every damn day. You’re the only person who tells me when I’m being stupid, and the only person I listen to when I’m being stupid. Hell, you’re the only person I can’t live without. I’ve already been living without her this entire time, between the long distance and the long missions, but from the moment I met you, I knew I’d need you. So let me need you. Let me love you.” He held his breath as he waited for your response. “It’s also a no charge on Caleb’s homemade meals for his girlfriend,” He added on lightheartedly, hoping you’d laugh.
You bit your lip in attempts not to.
But he knew you better than that. He grinned. “There she is. Hi, baby.”
Your cheeks flushed. “Caleb! You can’t just call me that- I’ve not even said yes yet!”
He smirked. “Yeah, but your cheeks already did.” He kissed each side of your blushing face.
“No charge on meals and you’re paying for concert tickets.” You grumbled, attempting to remain serious.
He laughed heartily. “Only you would attempt to put a price on a relationship. Fine. Sounds like a deal to me. I still think I got the better end of the bargain anyway.” He wrapped his arms around you, pulling you towards him before beaming down at you and peppering you with light kisses here and there. “I get a woman who’s both generous and gorgeous. She just gets Caleb.”
“Well, Caleb is more than enough for her. She loves Caleb exactly the way he is.”
“He’s starting to love Caleb the way he is too. All because of her.”
Taglist: @tbaluver @pixelcafe-network @ouiouimochi @inkytypewriter @minasfwoopyponytail
#l&ds caleb#caleb lads#love and deepspace caleb#caleb love and deepspace#lads caleb#caleb x you#caleb x reader#lnds caleb#han's library#love and deep space#lads#lnds#l&ds
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luigi x wife!reader headcanons. can be set before or after he went mia
right right right. married lu. throws myself on the floor
for the sake of length ill keep this to before he dropped off the face of the earth but ive written a memo to write about the after in a separate post soon
my personal biases might get in the way of this because i am unwell and genuinely think he is in desperate need of someone whos up at 3 am fighting a manifestation of their own hubris in their bed. he needs someone that experiences romantic delirium and is convinced her dreams tell her stories of the two of them from thousands of years ago. a girl thats considered showing up to a convent and who has a favorite saint. a rotten girl who wants to eat a piece of his birth certificate. this is so crucial to me unfortunately
that being said. its my belief that lu is saccharine, something he didnt know until you came along and peeled the wallpaper off his psyche. the way his customary sweetness unravels itself is sickly and all enveloping. hes the neediest boy in the world, forever coming to you with quiet infirmity. he drapes himself over you whenever he can, always saying how you were made to hold him. his incessant appetite for affection didnt ease with marriage. he plays with your ringed finger absentmindedly. presses his lips against it, not registering the habit
he would think of marriage early on in the relationship, unreachable to the anxious expressions of others when he'd say hes going to marry you weeks into dating. when he decided this, he paced back and forth in his bedroom, hardly able to focus long enough to tell the time before seeking his mom out to tell her. it all came out in one big prosaic wave. she thought he sounded like a child but his cheeks were flushed and his heart is so painfully stitched onto his sleeve in regards to you. he doesnt press the idea of the union but he likes to tell you how hes going to make you his wife during random moments. when youre eating. when you make him laugh. when hes fucking you
i can see lu trying and failing to preserve going all the way when you mess around once youve accepted his proposal. the engagement would be long. he is so busy and so wanted by everyone around him, but the novelty of you being his fiancé would wear off after the first couple of months. he wants to fuck his wife, not his girlfriend. he wants the sanctimony of marriage to wrap around the two of you when hes inside. the vow acts as a spectator in the bedroom, and he needs it. needs you to be his and only his under a holy decree. he calls you his bride and his little wife
in my heart of hearts....... i know lu would want to propose in the most cheesy way ever. his sister behind foliage, filming the whole thing. balloons. one knee. the rest of your family nearby. the video would be uploaded onto instagram, people you havent ever met commenting with what a beautiful couple the two of you make. but i think the right girl could pavlov him into asking in a whisper under the soft cotton of a bedsheet. face kisses and crying and pleading for the rest of your life to belong to him in some capacity. he cant live without this
the ring would be beautiful and heavy with weight and the diamond would be absurdly large. he'll never let onto the price, just like hes been doing with the checks at each restaurant youve been to together since your first date. bastard. whats next? steak tartare at the reception? he starts biting you each time you deny being able to accept such an insane piece of jewelry
#let lu have a mentally ill heap of a girl!!!!!!!!!!#this is my hill and im happy to die on it. just me and my acrylic keychains of us that i smash together to make kiss#💌#luigi thoughts#luigi mangione#luigi mangione x reader#luigi mangione imagine
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Hi, I hope all is well. I was wondering if you could do a Jacob x reader imprint with Paul?
Reader is Jacob's imprint, but so is Renesmee. Since Jacob has also loved Bella and he ended up imprinting on Renesmee, he loves being with them. He has an imprint his age and also happens to be Paul's best friend. The reader makes plans and invites Jacob, but he always picks Renesmee over the reader because he doesn't actually like the reader. Paul finds out from Rachel that Jacob has been bulling reader and telling her she's not good enough and wishes he never imprinted on her and how Nessie is so much better and he can't wait to marry her when she's older. Paul gets pissed when he finds this out, and he also confronts Ranchel, saying that he's heard her say rude stuff about the reader to the other imprints and has gotten into a physical fight with her. Paul goes to the beach to find the reader and sees her jump from where he and the guys do . He freaks out, and his wolf tells him to save his imprint. Can it be long and have smut?
heyy everything is great hope all is well for you !😸 sure i would love to do this hope you enjoy :)
delete forever - jacob x reader ft. paul
The wise man looked between you both as you sat still, soaking in every word.
Imprinting.
It sounded foreign but yet so familiar in your ears. Jacob takes a look at you, it’s hard to read his expression which was new. You were used to being able to have a guess at what he was thinking.
“Are you alright, son?” Billy Black asked when he was finished.
Jacob stuck his lips out a bit nonchalantly before nodding, “Yeah. I’m good.”
Silence surrounds the small table. The scoot of the chair moves backwards as Jacob then tells his dad that he’s leaving.
“Where are you going, son?”
“Just going over Paul’s.”
“Y/N, why don’t you go? Rachel’s there.” Billy suggests with a smile. Jacob freezes at the door.
“S-sure.” you say.
You and Jacob ride in his car in silence. You were too afraid to ask questions. He didn’t care too much to get them out of you.
“Wassup, man.” Jacob says and goes in with the handshake, Paul hits his back once and waves to you. You wave back.
“Yup. She’s my imprint.” he says. There’s no feeling for you to detect. Rachel looks at you as you sat meekly on the couch.
“She is?” she asks her brother. He nods in confirmation.
“Congrats to you both. Now Jake can stop getting on me and Rach’s nerves.” Paul chuckles. Jacob laughs sarcastically.
You smile a bit and Rachel doesn’t offer you a kind look as she continues to stare at you.
You look down.
“Rachel’s party is this weekend. Y/N are you coming?” Paul offers.
“Is she?” Rachel asks.
“She should.” Paul says to her before looking back to you.
“Sure..Will you be there, Jake?” you ask quietly.
“I’ll probably show my face. I should bring Bella.” he says.
“Yeah! Bring Bella.” Rachel says with more enthusiasm. Jacob grinned.
“I thought you didn’t like her?” Paul asks.
“Well..She’s a good gift giver.” Rachel defended with. Paul shakes his head with a slight roll of his eyes.
Billy Black calling you surprised you the next day, early in the morning.
“You…Imprinted on Renesmee too?” you ask him carefully. You watch the grin on his face grow as you both sat on his living room couch.
“Yeah.”
“But…She’s…She’s young.”
“I’m going to be her protector. I am her protector.” Jacob says in total defense mode, it caught you off guard. He’s never sounded that way when speaking about you.
“Why two imprints?” you ask Billy.
“We are thinking it’s to reward Jacob for stepping up to be the Alpha. He gets to actually choose.” Billy says.
Ever since that day, it felt like you had to fight for his attention.
“Want to go to the movies?” you ask as you knew for a fact he loved action movies.
“Nah…I’m going with Nessie.”
“To see a Disney movie? Come on, Jake.” you say through the phone.
“You asked and I said no. Okay?” he says and hang up. You stare at the phone in total disbelief.
You sat by yourself as you watched Rachel greet guests and dance. You came by yourself because when you asked Jacob for a ride, he said the car was full from him picking Bella and Renesmee up.
Bullshit.
You tell this to Paul when he gives you something to drink while asking where Jacob was and why you both didn’t come together.
“I thought Bella couldn’t be here because of the treaty?”
“You know Jacob. He made an exception for her. Now that…Nessie….Is his imprint, it’s allowed by the elders.” Paul whispered.
He sits next to you to keep you company. It wasn’t long before Rachel shimmied over to him and grab his hands, “Dance with me!”
Paul chuckled, “You’re drunk already?”
“I’m just tipsy.” she slurred.
“Sure.” he replied dripping in sarcasm.
You watch as Paul danced with Rachel. You kind of wish it was like that with you and Jacob. They weren’t imprinted but yet, they were defining the odds.
Paul joked all the time that he did so much that even his ancestors believed he shouldn’t be tied with someone. His bloodline would end with him. He still hasn’t found his imprint. Just to be safe, he didn’t mind getting cozy with Rachel because she was apart of his tribe.
“Bella! Nessie!” You hear and there they are, standing with gifts for Rachel. Renesmee gives a shy hug to Rachel and you watched a rare sight. Rachel hugged Bella. Jacob smiled at the moment until he looked over at you watching them.
After Paul mingled about, Paul tells you that he’s only grabbing Rachel’s cake and he will be right back.
“The girls are in the backyard. I’m sure you’re bored of the guys.” he says while grinning.
The sports game was playing as the pack make deep conversation about the plays.
You slowly get up and go to the backyard.
Renesmee sits on Bella’s lap as the girls sit at a table while laughing loudly and talking.
Every eye goes to you once you come out.
“Hey.”
“Hey.” they all say off key and awkwardly.
They watch you take a chair and sit in total silence. They blink at you for a moment before one speaks out, “Why do you do that?”
You look up to Jared’s imprint, Kim.
“Do…What?”
“Just sit there.”
“Because she’s a little slow. Leave her alone.” Rachel says. They burst into a laughing fit.
You look down as you felt angry at such low blow of an insult.
“Don’t be rude.” Bella says low.
“What? Well, she acts like it. No wonder Jacob would rather hang with an extroverted child than someone his own age.”
You get up and make your way to the door, leaving the backyard. You didn’t want to hear them talk, they continued to talk and laugh even with you out of the room.
You were silent as everyone else happily sing happy birthday to Rachel. You blink as she blew out her candles.
You sit again by yourself after she opens gifts.
“Can you give me a ride to Port Angeles? Please!” Quil asks Paul once the night was late.
“Dude, seriously?”
“Please. I will give you gas money and everything. I’m linking up with this girl and she’s...” he then whistles a bit as he thinks about what she looks like.
Paul sighs loudly before he grits, “Get in the car.”
Paul smooched Rachel before telling her he will be back.
He then tells you, “Go ahead and take some cake home. It’s going to do nothing but sit there anyways.”
You quietly tell him thank you and he leaves out.
You walk through the home and Jacob kneels as he helped Renesmee with her jacket.
“You’re leaving?” you ask.
“Yeah.” Jacob says quietly.
“Oh.”
“Yeah, I’ll see you later.” he says quickly and grabs the child’s hand as his tone changed, “Come on, Ness.”
You enter the kitchen and the giggling stopped once again.
“What do you think you’re doing?” Rachel demanded from the table.
You held up the knife, “I’m just getting some cake.”
“Who said?”
“Um…Paul said I could take some home.”
“Answer me this. Is it Paul’s birthday? Or is it my birthday?”
Giggles started to form and you eye the clock. It was after twelve.
“Neither. It’s past 12AM. Your day is officially over.”
Rachel stomped to you, “You’re trying to be funny?”
You stare blankly at her.
“Well, I got jokes.” she says and shoved you. Hard.
The knife was still in your hand as you stumbled back and you heard one of the imprints say, “Girl. She has a knife.”
Rachel grabs it out of your hand with no fear.
“You were gonna stab me with this?”
“N-no. I would never.” you stammer out. She sets it down on the counter with a clatter and takes your paper plate away with a snatch.
“I said…You’re not getting cake.”
“But-“
“What did I say?”
“Don’t be a bitch about it Rachel.” you say.
Gasps and ooh’s erupt the room as they instigate.
A hard slap hits your face. You tearfully hit her back before Rachel grabs a fist full of your hair and you both punch at each other before people get Rachel off of you.
“I’m gonna be a bitch if I want to. It’s my birthday. Mine.” she says.
You bounce your leg when you prayed Jacob would pick up the phone as you sat on the beach. The party was a week ago and you haven’t seen him since.
“Speak.” he says after the second time you call. Impatience was the last thing that he suppressed.
“Um..Hi.”
“What do you want, Y/N. I’m kind of busy right now.”
“I just wanted to hang out.” you say and let him know that you’re at the beach.
He sighs on the other side of the call, “Did you seriously call me just to come hang out with you a beach. Like, are you seriously forreal right now?”
“Yeah..I just..”
“Look. I get that you’re my imprint and all but we can be…Acquaintances.”
“Acquaintances.” you repeat back like a parrot.
“Yeah…”
You watched when you would go over Billy’s house how the little girl had Jacob in the palm of her hand. She was innocent. Him, not so much. He was babysitting her and he ordered you around like you were staff.
“Get her a cup.” he ordered you.
You set the cup down and he poured her juice as he cooed to her.
“Do you play dolls?” Renesmee asks you as she innocently stands while you watch television.
You smile and before you could open your mouth, Jacob enters, “I can play with you, Nessie.”
“Can Y/N join?” She says with excitement.
“No. Come on, Ness.”
Footsteps retreat as you soon heard the bin of Rachel’s old dolls be poured on the floor.
That’s what you did when you had to hear the time that they were spending together. It was hard to just leave because the pain in your chest was only soothed when you were around him.
You began to think you were in hell.
It was a sunny day on the beach and Paul sort of invited you last minute when he noticed that everyone except you were there.
“Want to make a sandcastle?” you heard Jacob ask Renesmee. She nods happily and grabs her bucket.
You slowly walk over as they were building. Jacob’s face drips with annoyance.
“Can I help?” you ask.
Renesmee smiles and gives you a shovel and you sit on your knees in the sand.
“We’re good, Y/N.”
“What’s wrong with trying to help?” you mutter.
“You messed up what we were building.”
Resnesmee leaves off to refill her bucket.
“It’s fine. I’ll just fix it.”
“Would you quit it?” he hissed.
You freeze.
“Damn! You….” he huffed angrily, “Why the hell did I even imprint on you, huh?” he says to you only you could hear.
“Why are you talking like that?”
“Because I’m frustrated! I choose Nessie. Not you. So, you don’t have to keep inserting yourself because you don’t soothe me or my wolf. She does. You’re not good enough for us. Nessie is. When she grows up, she will be able to see our bond and we can get married and I can’t wait. Until then, butt out.”
You drop the shovel as your sight began to be blurry. Your heart broke in a clean split. Resnesmee watched in confusion as she tries to return to the sandcastle with a bucket full of fresh wet sand.
“Are you leaving?” she asks in a small voice. You nod sadly not wanting to let a child see you cry.
“Have fun, okay?” you say with a smile that you tried your best to muster up and walk off.
You look over before leaving and Jacob is immersed in the time he’s spending with Renesmee. He looked up once and the look gave you a shiver down your spine. Almost like disgust.
You accept this. Jacob didn’t want you. You definitely didn’t want him. As you went home, you felt like you were leaving the bond right at the beach.
That night, Paul sat on the edge of the bed with his hands clasped together.
“He said all of that?” Paul asks quietly with furrowed eyebrows.
Rachel chuckled a bit, “Yeah. That’s why she left.”
Paul sighed in disbelief.
“He stays bullying her. He must really hate the imprint bond they have.” she says as she laughs.
“The fuck are you laughing for?” Paul speaks darkly.
She pauses as she looks at Paul’s dark demeanor. He turns to her and expects her to answer so he asks her another question, “What? You think that shit is funny?”
She’s silent as she looks at him.
He rolls his eyes and turns back forward.
“You’re acting like I’m the one who said that.” she tells him.
“I’m not dumb Rachel and you’re pretending like I am and that’s pissing me off.”
“How? Did I call you dumb?” she quizzed him.
“No, but I know what you did at your party.”
Silence dropped like a dead weight.
“Forgot to get my keys when it was time to drop Quil off. I heard you talking shit with all of the imprints. Why did you feel the need to put your hands on her?”
“She had a knife! She embarrassed me on my birthday!”
“She’s better than me. Blood would’ve shed.”
Rachel scoffs, “You’re such a weirdo.”
“Takes one to know one. Isn’t that right?”
Rachel rolls her eyes and grabs your belongings, “I’m out.”
Paul didn’t care. The door slammed and he lay back in bed as he made plans to apologize to you on behalf of both Rachel and Jacob.
He blinked awake as he made his way to your house. You weren’t there. He knew your next favorite place was the beach.
He scanned the shore but didn’t see you either. He puts two hands on his hips as he knew for a fact you wouldn’t go to Jacob’s, especially not after what happened.
He saw a figure, high up on a cliff. He called your name but you couldn’t hear him. He called it again with two hands around his mouth to echo it. No use.
He ran to where he would have to get to the top of the cliffs.
The wind whipped on your skin as you stare down at the moving water.
You close your eyes. You blindly jump and Paul screamed your name louder as he was almost there to the top and seen your body jump off.
“Mine.”
“Imprint.”
“Save her.”
He listened to the determined voice of his wolf.
He dived right behind you.
You weren’t moving, you let the current of the water drag you down, pulling you into the darkness. The darkness that matched your damaged heart.
Paul’s strong hand pulled you out and he pressed and pressed on your chest on the shore until you gasped for air. Water couched out of your mouth as he sat you up. He rubbed your back as he patted it to make sure you coughed all of the water up.
You blink at him and it was like you saw an angel. The angel was Paul looking down at you in worry. It hit you both like whiplash as Jacob was forgotten. Rachel was forgotten. It was just you and him. You and him against the world. He saw a bright future. You saw a shimmer of hope.
He hugged your wet body then.
“Fuck…What the hell were you thinking, Y/N?” he whispered emotionally.
You couldn’t speak. He didn’t pressure you to.
You peel off your clothes in the bathroom and set them outside of the bathroom door like Paul instructed. He threw them in the dryer while you stood in the shower. You don’t rush.
Your mind racked with wonders and fear but your heart reminded you that you were right where you belonged. As you scrubbed your skin, you felt yourself being able to call his house, your home. You shake your head.
You clutched the towel as you sat on the toilet lid. You didn’t want to leave and face Paul.
A knock at the door startled you a bit.
“Yes?” you answer with a small voice.
“Are you alright? You’ve been in there for a while. Your clothes are dry.”
You were shocked that you were in the bathroom for that long.
You twist open the door but you sit back down on the toilet lid.
“Y/N? What’s going on?” he asks carefully. You clutched your towel tighter.
You opened your mouth but the words wouldn’t fall from the tip of your tongue.
He kneels in front of you.
“I heard what happened yesterday. It was fucked up.” he whispered. You look down.
“I don’t know if…I dont know if it’s me just completely heartbroken…But, when you saved me…It felt like it did when I looked at Jacob for the first time.”
“Y/N, I imprinted on you. That’s why you felt what you felt.”
Your bottom lip wobbled, “Just reject it. Reject it please. Delete forever.” you say and shake your head.
“No. No way in hell I’m doing that.”
“My old imprint threw me away like garbage. Don’t toy with me. Just let me know where my clothes are.” you say as you get up but the towel fell from your distress. Paul bit back on his lip before a shaky hand picked up your towel. You leave out the bathroom as you glanced about in the hallway.
He gently takes your arm.
“I’m not toying with you….Jacob is an idiot.” he says quietly.
You don’t say anything still not believing him but you couldn’t detect the lie you were looking for.
“Look at me.” he says encouragingly soft.
You look up.
He then slowly smiled, “Are you listening?”
You slowly nod.
“I feel on top of the world right now…Being around you brings me peace…Do I bring you peace?”
You think for a moment before you eventually nod. He rubbed your arms. His touch made you melt like ice cream on a hot summer day.
“You don’t ever have to worry about them, alright?” he says. You nod again.
“Do you…Accept the imprint with me?” he asks nervously. You never seen him nervous before. You nod again.
“No, I want to hear you say it.”
You crack open your mouth and whisper out a very sure yes. The smile he gave you made your heart pound in your ears.
Slowly, the gap between you two were closed as he placed a sweet kiss on your lips. You blink as you pull back. His thumb brushed your bottom lip to keep them slightly open. He leans in again. It was addicting just to do. You raise your hands to touch his face while he titled his head into the kiss.
You gasp as you realized that the towel had dropped again.
“Don’t worry about it.” he says in your ear, he pulled you to him and you felt the delicious heat from his skin.
His hands make your body respond in ways you never knew it could. The kiss was more sensual and passionate. You’ve never been kissed like that before and you found out very quickly that you liked it.
He takes your hand and let you feel the hardness in his shorts. He groaned in your mouth as you break out a breathy but soft moan.
He lifts you in his arms as if you were the most delicate china dish known to man.
Laying back, you pant slightly as you look at him. He shoved his shorts down and takes your hand again to feel him. He was so heavy and so veiny.
Breaths were heavy as you watch him groan and move his hips while you held him in your hand.
He goes in for another kiss which makes you feel achy and horny. You’ve been excited before but this was something different.
A set of warm hands caressed your body as you lay back on his comfortable bed.
Lips and tongue circled the nipples the your breast before he sleeked his fingers in your wet center. You sigh out.
He relaxed your thighs as he whispered for you to keep them open for him. You stutter out your breaths as he licked and ate at the moist center that was in his face.
His hands never stopped feeling your skin and you felt like you were in flames.
You didn’t know what was what. All you knew was that it was daylight when you arrived to it now being dark.
You breathe in and out when you pushed him away from not being able to take it anymore. You crawl away from him but he follows you.
On your hands and knees, you moan out shakily as he kept gliding himself in between you as his hands were firm on your waist and hips. He picked up the pace and you wished he was inside of you as he did so because it felt so good that you were crumbling all over again. He held you against him with your back to his chest as you fell apart once again.
He kissed your neck and felt the front of you. His hand caressed the center that was dripping wet.
Circling and dipping his fingers, you gripped his strong arms as you whined his name. Your hips moved to the sunken fingers that were inside of you as he traced his tongue with your ear. Your body gives out as you saw the same stars once again.
He lays you on your back as he slowly entered into you. He makes sure to keep your nub stimulated with his thumb as he does so.
You felt so full as you blinked at the darkness.
He moved and you felt like you were melting inside and out. He felt like he was in a wet dream. Both of you were so in the zone of each other, that you both forgot how to breathe at times.
Sitting hand in hand at Billy’s table, he smiled to you.
“When a door closes, a window will open.” he tells you both.
You look at each other with a smile that each other displayed to show that you both were happy. The feelings were mutual.
#jacob black#jacob black x reader#paul lahote#paul lahote x reader#paul lahote smut#wolf pack#wolfpack#y/n#y/n imagines#x y/n#x reader#x reader angst#paul lahote x you#paul lahote fluff#fanfic#twilight saga
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Marriage Problems Chapter 2
Summary: They’ve been married for 19 years, their 20th anniversary coming up soon. Older, busier, and stuck on the repeat of their daily lives, Y/N and Bucky are struggling. Their marriage is good, but feeling rocky the last few years as they’ve settled into this stage of their lives. Can they get their spark back? Or is it better to do the unthinkable, and move on without each other?
Warnings: language, forced kiss, eventual smut
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Bucky rushed home after work that day. The presentation had gone well, securing his bonus, but had run over the time he’d originally planned. He had texted Y/N, but never got a response. He got home as fast as he could, walking into the kitchen to find it empty. Fuck, missed dinner, he thought, chastising himself as he unloaded his things and cleaned them. He walked toward the sound of the kids’ voices in the front room. They were all spread out on the floor doing homework, spouting off endless questions to Y/N, who was trying her best to help them while also mediating between Winnie and Becca, which seemed like a constant these days.
“Mama she won’t stop brushing her eraser shavings on my paper!” Winnie whined, trying to shove the eraser bits back toward Becca.
“Oh my god, you’re so annoying,” Becca whined back. “Not everything I do is to spite you. Maybe if you wouldn’t sit so close to me they wouldn’t land on your stuff!”
“Guys, please,” Y/N sighed, rubbing her eyes.
“Hello my loves,” Bucky called out, trying to distract them.
The kids all looked up at him with smiles on their faces, quickly getting up and giving him hugs and greetings before sitting back down. Bucky moved over and around them to Y/N, kneeling down next to her. She gave him a small smile in greeting. “How did your presentation go?” she asked quietly.
“We got it,” he replied, smiling at her.
“Congratulations,” Y/N’s smile widened.
It was one of the few real smiles he’d gotten from her in a while, and it made his heart soar. Before he could say anything else the girls were bickering again, and James started firing off questions.
“Quit with the eraser! Geez, do you just not get it so you keep having to restart? How stupid can you be?”
“Mama, did you sign that form for the field trip yet?”
“I’m not the stupid one, you are!”
“Nuh-uh!”
“And I have that bake sale coming up, did you sign up for cupcakes? Or muffins? Your cookies last year were good. Oh and my soccer uniform is all grassy, did you wash it yet?”
Y/N shut her eyes tight, trying to breath through the mounting noise.
“Guys,” Bucky said in a warning tone.
“Dad she’s being so annoying. Why can’t you just leave me alone? This is why you don’t have any friends.”
“I have plenty of friends. You wouldn’t know anything about that because all the friends you have are just guys trying to date you. How does it feel knowing that they don’t actually care about you, just what they can get from you?”
“At least I can get a date.”
“Mama, what does she mean what they can get from her?”
“OH MY GOD SHUT UP!” Y/N screamed, standing up fast and pushing away from them all, covering her ears. “SHUT UP! ALL OF YOU! JESUS CHRIST!” They all froze, staring at her in shock. “No, James, I haven’t done any of that yet. It will get done eventually. As for you two,” she pointed at the girls. “I know you’re both in a very weird stage of teen years right now, but if I hear one more mean thing said between the two of you I will ground you both for the rest of the school year, do you hear me?” They both nodded quickly. “I cannot stand this anymore. This constant bickering, the noise, the incessant leaning on me for every little thing. I’m so sick of the same thing day in and day out! I’m done!”
Bucky stared at her in shock. She had yelled at the kids before during rough moments, but this was different. Y/N looked at them all with a deep look of disgust. “I love you all very much. But this is absolutely ridiculous, and I will not put up with it anymore. I deserve better than this endless, repetitive, tedious bullshit! Don’t I?” Bucky stood up and walked over to her. She had started crying as she spoke, and as he cupped her face in his hands she looked up at him, her eyes pleading and exhausted. “Don’t I?” she cried.
“Yes, you do,” Bucky whispered, nodding as he leaned down and pressed his forehead against her forehead. “Just breathe, pretty mama. Breathe.”
Y/N sputtered, her hands in fists at her sides as she closed her eyes. She let herself relax against him for a moment, but just as suddenly as it started she shook her head again and pulled out of his grasp, sniffing hard. “I…I’m fine, I just–” she glanced at them all, her face twisting into a look of horror. “I’m sorry,” she gasped, then turned and ran up the stairs.
Bucky watched her run, sighing when he heard their bedroom door shut loudly. He turned to look at the kids, each of them with a look of shock and sadness on their faces. “It’s gonna be okay, guys,” he said quietly, sitting down on the floor with them again. “Mama just needs some time. But she’s right,” he said, looking down at his hands then at Becca. “Becca, if what Winnie’s saying is true, you need to find better friends. Boys, especially at this age, aren’t worth it.” She frowned and looked down. “Winnie, you need to let Becca have her time away from you. Just because you’re both close in age and go to the same school doesn’t mean you’re both the same. She is her own person, and you are your own person. Does that make sense?” Winnie’s lips tightened, but she nodded. “James, I know you mean well, but asking a lot of questions all at once is very overwhelming for Mama, and as much as she is willing to help you, she needs a breather just like everyone else. Got it?” James nodded sadly. “As for all three of you, you’re old enough now, and your mom and I have taught you enough by now, to be able to handle yourselves more. That means from now on you’re responsible for knowing your schedules, taking care of yourselves with your personal hygiene, cleaning up after yourselves, and as of now you’ll be responsible for getting your lunches for school ready, preparing your own breakfasts, and making sure you’re out the door on time for the bus. Also, laundry,” he said, glancing at James for emphasis. “Your clothes, your problem. Do you all understand?”
They all nodded solemnly. “Good. We are going to have to work together to take the brunt of the work off of Mama. She’s done too much for all of us for too long. Which makes her an amazing mother and wife–” he stopped, nearly getting choked up on his words, before quickly clearing his throat. “But it’s too much for just one person to handle. We are a family, and family loves and supports each other, right?” They all nodded again. “Okay. Are you all done with your homework enough for tomorrow?”
“Yes,” they all said in unison.
“Great. Then go get ready for bed,” Bucky said. “Good night, my spawn.”
They all giggled and gave him goodnight farewells and hugs, gathering their things and putting them away before trudging up the stairs to get ready for bed. Bucky sighed as he stood up again, stretching before looking around the main floor of the house. It was mostly pretty clean, so he got to work cleaning up the last few little messes and things he could see that needed to be done, then ate the leftovers from dinner.
When he was finished the kids had all settled down in bed, and he tucked them each in before heading to his bedroom. Bucky hesitated at the door, unsure of how to broach what had happened. He knocked lightly, waiting to hear anything, but after a moment of silence he slowly opened the door. He peered in and found Y/N already in bed, her soft snores the only sound in the room. Bucky walked in and closed the door quietly, walking over to her side of the bed and kneeling down. She was already in her pajamas, and judging from her makeup free face and the puffiness of her eyes, she had cried as she got ready for bed and up until she fell asleep. Bucky’s heart broke for her. He and the kids had been leaning on her for everything for so long. They had taken advantage of her. She had been suffering silently because she felt like she could only depend on herself to get things done. He reached up and gently wiped away the last bits of tears that were still wet on her face, then leaned forward and kissed her nose. “I’m so sorry, pretty mama,” he whispered, nuzzling her cheek with his nose. “We’ll talk about it tomorrow. I love you.”
Y/N squirmed a little in her sleep at his touch, but didn’t wake, letting out a short hum as she readjusted herself. Bucky smiled at her, fixing the blanket around her and tucking her in before getting ready for bed.
@cjand10 @sebastians-love @sherwoodforesttales @shanksstrawhat
#marvel#bucky barnes#smut#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes fanfic#series fanfic#chapter 2#mother!reader#father!bucky barnes#married couple#bucky x reader
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