#because he likes sewing things and fates together

[hauntingmiser]

Day 28 !

Here is a cosmic bird that is a lawyer

[mrsshabana]

𝐙𝐎𝐌𝐁𝐈𝐄!𝐆𝐘𝐔𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐎 ⛧ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐎𝐍𝐄

꒦꒷‧₊ Summary As a modern-day witch, you're used to encounters with the supernatural. But when your crush suddenly dies in an accident you act on a whim and bring him back to life, turning him into an undead monster. Will you be able to make him feel alive again? ꒦꒷‧₊ Content Gyutaro x female!reader, 18+ MDNI, witchcraft, gore, body horror, violence ꒦꒷‧₊ Note 1.3k words. This story was inspired by American Horror Story Coven.

༺ Art ༻

⇢ Chapter two ⇢ Chapter three ⇢ Kinktober Masterlist

Things were never supposed to happen this way.

You had good intentions, but you didn't think things through. God, you should have thought twice.

But you couldn't not do it. The only reason he died was because he fell for you. A cursed girl.

Gyutaro worked at the local plant nursery where you shopped weekly. He wasn't the type for customer service, but he liked seeing you. Always going out of his way to order rare plants and materials for you.

You are a witch after all, so his assistance was very helpful for you and your coven. Of course, Gyutaro didn't know you were a witch, he just thought you were a cute girl who liked the shop. He never thought much about why you came in so often.

Besides, he only worked there because they were chill and didn't care that he would come to work smelling like weed.

He was a strange guy, but you'd be lying if you said you didn't have a crush on him. Those pretty birthmarks and that crooked smile were too much for your heart to resist.

But everything changed when you found out about the accident. One night when he was driving home from work, his motorcycle was hit by a semitruck.

An accident like that doesn't happen every day. It was no coincidence, and you knew it.

Being a witch has its perks, but there are also cons as well. Every boy that's ever loved you has died a tragic death. If only you knew how much he liked you, you would have stopped coming around. But it's too late now.

That poor, sweet boy died because he fell in love with a witch. You couldn't let this be his fate. Maybe he was just some shop employee but he was so much more than that to you.

And that's what caused you to make the rash decision to perform a resurrection ritual. You've only ever resurrected small animals, so this was very new to you.

There was no turning back after you broke into the morgue. Reattaching his body parts and sewing them back together. The accident must have been horrific for his body to have been separated into so many pieces. At least piecing him back together wasn't too hard, the pieces were easy to identify since they had those pretty black spots on them.

At first, you thought the ritual didn't work. After blowing out your candles and double checking you did everything correctly, his body still lay there motionless and cold.

You didn't realize you had been there for so long until an employee came in to start their shift for the day. Quickly hiding behind a metal table, you tried to stay out of sight.

The poor guy wasn't ready for what he saw. In his eyes, it seemed like some kind of devil worshippers broke in and desecrated the body.

He shouldn't have gotten so close.

Maybe it was the smell of fresh flesh that awoke him, or maybe he sensed that his summoner was in danger. Who knows? But Gyutaro opened his eyes and attacked the man. Animalistic as he sunk his jagged teeth into the man's throat.

"Gyutaro, stop!!" You tried to pull him away but there was no use. The warm blood entering his cold dead body was too much to turn away from.

Eventually, you were able to pull him away and coerce him out of the building. And that leads you to where you are now. Desperately trying to lead him into your apartment without any of your neighbors noticing.

He moans and groans as he struggles to walk. Some parts of his body were more decomposed than others, so it'll take a while for them to work properly again.

Somehow you manage to get him inside, helping him onto the couch so he can rest.

Seeing him in this state, a bloodthirsty monster, barely able to control his body, and unable to speak. That's when the regret starts to set in. Maybe he's suffering more now that he's been resurrected. At least in death, he was at rest.

Tears prick at your eyes as you begin to clean the blood off of him.

"Gyutaro... do you remember me? Y/N? I was one of your customers."

He groans and stares at you, "...Y...Y..." He mumbles the beginning of your name but he isn't able to push the word out.

Feeling relieved that he seemingly remembers you, you go on to explain the situation to him. "I don't know how to say this... but Gyutaro, you died. You were in a terrible accident. Do you remember what happened?"

"..." He's silent as his mismatched eyes dart around. Then out of nowhere he begins to yell, banging his arms on the couch, grabbing things off the end table and throwing them across the room in a fit of frustrated rage.

"Hey, hey calm down!" You try to calm him down but to no avail.

He screams until his voice is raw. Unable to speak or properly control himself, his tantrum intensifies. There's nothing you can do as he's far too strong to restrain. So you just let him let it all out until he's left tired and full of so many emotions he isn't able to express in his new form.

Seeing him now, you aren't even sure if he's Gyutaro anymore. How much of him is left in there? Maybe you only created a monster in the shape of the boy you once loved. But either way, this monster is now your responsibility.

You try giving him time to adjust to his new life, but the tantrums keep coming. Bursts of anger ensue when he gets frustrated. He feels like he's trapped inside of a body that barely works. Deep down he knows how to function, but he just can't. Not to mention the nothingness he feels inside. He feels like a walking husk of who he used to be, completely hollow and empty.

Not only is he emotionally numb, but physically too. Whether his arm falls off because the stitches came undone, or he stabs himself because he gets curious about what would happen. He doesn't feel a thing.

You're the only exception. As soon as your fingers grace his cold discolored skin he feels a spark of warmth. A sensation so pleasant that he can't help but crave it. In a body full of nothingness, your touch is the only thing that makes him feel alive again. He just wishes that he could tell you.

Countless nights you've spent researching spells and remedies to help ease him. Some books say he needs human flesh. Others say you must give him some of your life force. Some suggest doing something to get his blood pumping again, something to kickstart his instincts. But nothing comes to mind.

Not until he limps his way into your bedroom one night as you're researching.

The thuds of the zombie boy's footsteps get louder as he walks towards you.

"What is it, Gyu? Are you hungry again?" You turn and give him a soft smile, "Remember, no eating people-"

He interrupts you with a low groan like he has something he wants to tell you.

"Y-Y/N..." he barely mumbles your name.

"Yes? Do you need me to do something?" You say as you get up from your desk to stand in front of him, ready to help him with whatever he needs.

He looks down at you, his undead eyes glossed over. With slow and jagged movements he grabs your wrist and places your hand on his chest. "F-Fe...eel... al-ive..."

Your eyes widen as you feel his heart weakly begin to beat under your touch, "Y-You feel alive when I touch you?"

He nods slowly, "Tou...ch... mo-more..."

[fuckyeahdindjarin]

IV ║ Notch

Joel Miller x F!Reader

{ Part III: Edgestitch | Behind the Seams: Part IV | Series Masterlist | Main Masterlist }

Rating: E, but not that explicit

Summary: While Ellie works her first shift at the Outfitters, Joel drops by yours to return the blouse you left behind at the baby shower. Turns out, there's plenty around the house to keep him occupied until the teenager clocks off.

Warnings: Sexual tension, body insecurity, some language, inaccurate descriptions of gardening, gratuitous descriptions of the male body, undervest supremacy, flirting, dry humping, shy!reader, reader has a nickname related to her job, soft!domestic!Joel, no use of Y/N

Word count: 8.9k

Notes: Once I started writing this chapter in earnest, it came together a bit more quickly than I expected! It's extremely self-indulgent, with plenty of white undervest and belly action because you guys deserve all of that goodness for being the most patient, loving readers a writer could hope for 🥹 Thank you, I love you all! ❤️

Notch – diamond shaped marks that stick out beyond the edge of the pattern to line up all the pieces when sewing the garment. They come in pairs to be matched up.

Joel is sleeping - which is not something that could be said until a couple of months ago.

After the outbreak, sleep as a concept ceased to exist. What took its place is literal ‘shuteye’, either engineered by pills knocked back with moonshine, or a preventative shutdown by his body to avoid total failure, having pushed his physical form to the living limit.

It’s the kind of sleep that is destitute and provides no relief. It keeps the cogs turning just enough that he doesn’t expire, standing in his boots - which, on most days, are not the only things held together by duct tape.

But after the hospital, even that turned out to be too much to ask for. Some nights, the itch for chemical-induced relief got so bad that Joel entertained the thought of asking Tommy for illicit pills, ready to crawl on all fours to his brother’s house two streets down because he was shaking so hard he couldn’t lock his knees. But he didn’t trust him not to tell Maria, and with Ellie in the picture, he wasn’t about to tempt fate.

So instead, he asked Maria to assign him to night patrols. She hmmm’d at his request like she knew something he didn’t, but she humoured him, letting him take the graveyard shift for a couple of weeks straight. She didn’t have to tell him that she could see the way he tripped over his own feet and hear the slur in his voice. She’s too sharp not to notice.

But she didn’t say anything.

What she did do though, was not so subtly wean him off the late-night patrols. It started with a couple of random, last-minute changes, and then the next thing he knew, he was working morning shifts exclusively. When he tried covertly swapping stints with another guy, he showed up at the guard tower at midnight to find his sister-in-law standing in the doorway, arms crossed over her pregnant belly. 

As he trudged home begrudgingly with his head down and her stern reprimand in his ears, he couldn’t help a chuckle. Gotta hand it to her. 

Banished back to his bed, Joel went back to staring owlishly at the ceiling, watching the moonlight slide across the plaster until he knew all the cracks in it with his eyes closed (metaphorically). He’d listen to Ellie snoring away two doors down and marvel at the fact that she somehow still slept like the dead, even after… all that.

And then, one night, it happened for him too.

Admittedly, he ate a bit too much at Tommy and Maria’s - on top of running the town like a well-oiled machine, she makes a mean chicken fried steak - and Ellie had not so subtly plonked a second helping on his plate without asking. He was lying in bed, steeling himself for another long night, when his eyes drooped. The motion was so alien that it jolted him wide awake, but he couldn’t shake the weight that clung to the seams of his lashes. The next time he opened his eyes, it was morning.

Turns out you can teach an old dog new tricks. 

It’s nowhere near consistent, and more often than not he wakes up in a cold sweat in the small hours, but in between, he’s sleeping. For once, he’s feeling rested. And it’s a nice fucking break from the relentless exhaustion that he’s convinced is fused into his bones.

He always wakes up earlier than Ellie though. She never stomps down the stairs until he’s already had breakfast, and hers has gone cold.

So on the Saturday morning following the baby shower, with his face plastered into the mattress, body curled around a pillow - old habits die hard - Joel nearly falls out of bed at the banging on his door.

‘Joel! Get the fuck up!’

For one disconcerting moment between sleep and wake, he’s in his bedroom back in Texas. He half expects to look up to see the posters on the wall and the perpetually overflowing laundry basket at the foot of his bed.

Blinking through the urge to close his eyes, the colours fade and he stares blearily at the digital clock on his bedside table. 

7:30.

What the fuck? More often than not he has to drag the teenager out of bed by the ankles, kicking and swearing, at 7:50 to get to school at 8:00.

His knees groan as he staggers onto his feet, grabbing yesterday’s jeans from the floor and pulling them on. He finds a passably clean shirt about five deep on a chair, which he shrugs on over his white undervest. With a grunt, he yanks open the door and heads downstairs on bare feet, frowning at unfamiliar sounds coming from the kitchen.

Joel pauses in the doorway, hands on hips. ‘What do you think you’re doin’?’

Deeming his question unworthy of a response, Ellie tosses him a roll of her eyes over her shoulder and resolutely ignores him.

Shuffling closer, he asks, ‘Are you - cookin’?’

Brandishing the spatula at him, she snarls, ‘What does it look like I’m doing?’

He goads her with a smirk. ‘To be honest, it looks like you threw up in the pan.’

Ellie elbows him hard in the stomach. ‘Fuck you, man!’

He grins. There’s nothing like winding her up first thing in the morning. Grabbing the pan, he bins the ruined eggs, scraping off the burnt bits stuck to the bottom. ‘Crack some more eggs, I’ll make ‘em.’

Ten minutes later, in their usual seats at the kitchen table, they tuck into scrambled eggs and buttered toast.

‘Slow down,’ warns Joel as Ellie wolfs down hers. ‘You’re gonna choke.’

‘You hurry up! Can’t be late for my first day,’ she garbles through a mouthful of food.

‘Why can’t you be like this about school?’ he grumbles, then he winces as his teeth catch something crunchy. Picking it out, he gives her a pointed look. ‘Eggshell.’

‘Calcium,’ she shoots back without even looking up, too busy shoving the rest of her breakfast into her mouth, stuffing her cheeks like a chipmunk.

That one word stops Joel in his tracks and hurls him twenty years back in time.

But then Ellie is jumping up and practically throwing her empty plate into the sink, sneakers squeaking on the tiled floor as she dashes out of the kitchen. ‘C’mon, old man!’

Joel smiles, the memory warm like sun on his face. 

He shakes his head, slowly finishing his breakfast - like he wishes he did that day.

They turn out to be fifteen minutes early. 

To his chagrin, Ellie admits freely that she lied about the time so they wouldn’t be late. He’s a punctual guy, thank you very much. He certainly doesn’t need to be schooled by the little brat. 

Joel sits on the stairs, while Ellie has her face squished up against the door, unabashedly leaving smudges on the glass panels as she keeps up an uninterrupted running commentary on every last piece of clothing she can see.

He tunes her out easily, shifting in his seat so that his right ear is to the door. In his hands is the blouse that you left behind at Tommy and Maria’s at the baby shower. He’s been meaning to return it to you, but the week got away from him, and there’s no time like the present.

Considering the state of his knees, he impresses himself with the speed at which he stands at the sound of footsteps on the otherwise quiet main street. Squaring his shoulders, he discreetly pulls on his shirt, suddenly seeing wrinkles everywhere in the fabric, and runs his fingers through his hair, wishing he’d taken another look in the mirror before he left the house -

But it’s Lucy who appears at the bottom of the stairs with her unfailingly sunny smile.

‘Hi, you must be Ellie,’ she chirps.

She eyes Lucy cautiously, lips pinched to one side. ‘Where’s Pin?’

Joel growls. ‘Manners.’

Ellie puts her hands up in surrender. ‘Sorry. I meant - nice to meet you, where’s Pin?’

Lucy beams good-naturedly and fiddles with the lock. ‘She’s off today, and it’s all my fault because I made her work three weekends in a row. You’ll be helping me in the front anyway, so I’ll show you the ropes.’ Stepping aside and swinging the door open, she prompts, ‘In you go now, hon.’

Ellie doesn’t even look back at him, rushing into the shop like a thoroughbred fresh out of the starting gates.

Pocketing the keys, Lucy smiles. ‘Hi Joel.’

‘Hey,’ he nods back. ‘Sorry about Ellie.’

‘Don’t be, I was exactly like her when I was younger. Still am sometimes,’ she jokes. Then with a sly side eye, she remarks, ‘And honestly, you look more disappointed that I showed up than she does.’

He splutters, ‘Dunno what you’re talkin’ about.’ 

She smirks knowingly, gesturing at the blouse clutched tightly in his left fist. ‘I can pass that to Pin for ya.’

Joel hesitates for just a second, and Lucy bursts into laughter, elbowing him teasingly. ‘The way your face fell! I’m joking, Miller. Relax.’

He shakes his head. ‘It’s fine, guess I’ll give it to her next time she’s ‘round.’

Just then, from the depths of the shop, Ellie gasps dramatically and yells at the top of her lungs, ‘I want thissssssss one!’ 

Meeting Lucy’s eyes, Joel asks, ‘Sure you gonna be ok left alone with her?’

She shrugs. ‘There’s only one way to find out.’

He flashes her a thumbs up. ‘I’ll pick her up at three then.’

He’s about to walk away from the Outfitters when Lucy’s voice stops him. ‘Hey, Joel!’

Looking up at the wraparound porch, he raises an eyebrow in a silent question.

‘She lives in the yellow cottage on the same street as the shoe shop. Keep going north, you can’t miss it,’ she says with a two-finger salute and a parting line that he’s heard before. ‘Say hi to Pin for me!’

You’ve always had a soft spot for the turn of the season, when late spring blooms graciously give way to summer buds. The grass smells greener, and the air is pregnant with pollen and nectar. It’s not overly warm yet, but you can feel the intensity in the sunlight, muted only by the early hour. Good thing you’re starting early.

It’s unseasonably warm for June, and the vegetable patch on the far end of your garden has suddenly burst into life. The cauliflower has finally come through after two failed crops in a row, and both the tomato vines and pepper plants are thriving. Closer to the ground, the onion and garlic shoots are patiently waiting to be pulled, and asparagus shoots spear through the earth in tidy lines one after another.

Pulling on a hat and gloves, you get to work.

You’re halfway through the second row of onions when there’s a faint knock on the front door. Even though you’ve only been in the sun for a little while, the coolness inside the house feels like a balm to your skin as you pad inside, peeling off your gloves before reaching for the door. 

Swinging it open, you’re stumped by the sight of Joel Miller on your doorstep.

You haven’t seen him since the party, where you’d agreed on a start date and time for Ellie’s first shift, and -

Since the kiss. 

You’ve felt his absence keenly. You’ve caught yourself loitering on street corners, hoping to catch a glimpse of him, knowing you’ll be able to spot him just by the way his shoulders swing with his long strides. You’ve kept an ear out for the southern lilt that has chased goosebumps across your skin, or any mention of his name, but all in vain.

Jackson has a habit of growing in size, usually in direct proportion to one’s desperation.

Now that he’s somehow here, you’re aware you’re gaping at him, so broad that his shoulders are blocking out the daylight. Too many years out of practice to count, you have no idea what the protocol is when you next see the man who literally made your knees buckle with just his lips and nothing else.

‘Mornin’, he finally says with a small smile. 

You stammer. ‘H-hello. What, um, I mean, how -’

‘I dropped off Ellie at the shop and Lucy told me where you live,’ he explains, shaking out the blouse in his hands. ‘Thought I’d come ‘round and return this.’

Your palm twitches with the urge to smack yourself on the forehead. Of course that’s why he’s here. 

Taking the top from him, you smile back gratefully. ‘Thank you. And of course, it’s Ellie’s first day. I’m sorry I can’t be there, but I’ve been subbing for Lucy on the weekends for a month straight and I needed a break.’

He waves away your apology. ‘Count yourself lucky. She was just ���bout bouncin’ off the walls.’

‘Bless her heart,’ you chuckle, breaking off when his eyes flicker over you, as if he’s just registered your very minimalist ensemble of a white cotton tank top and denim cut-offs. Your skin prickles under his scrutiny, flattery winning out against self-consciousness at the deliberate drag of his gaze over you, a thoughtful weight behind it. 

That is until something catches his attention, and you flinch when he peers under the brim of your hat. ‘What -’

Before you can even articulate your question, he’s taken one step towards you, his work boots heavy on your creaky wooden porch. His voice is low but rough around the edges, just the way you like it. 

‘You got some dirt -’ he swipes his index finger firmly on the end of your nose. ‘Right here.’

Your jaw hangs open, then clamps shut, in quick succession, the shell of your ears burning hot at his fleeting touch. Throat suddenly dry, you barely manage to squeak, ‘Thanks.’ 

One day, you will at least try and keep your cool around this man. But alas, it is not this day.

Rearranging himself, Joel leans on the doorframe with his arms crossed and remarks conversationally, ‘You look outdoorsy this mornin’.’

Flashing the soil-stained gloves at him, you try to keep your voice steady. ‘I’m just doing some gardening out back. The vegetable patch needs harvesting.’

He purses his lips at that. ‘Didn’t peg you as the gardenin’ type.’

You don’t know where the bravado comes from, but you swat him on the arm with the gloves and quip, ‘There’s a lot you don’t know about me.’

‘You got me there,’ he huffs a laugh and gestures towards the back of the house. ‘Anythin’ I can do to help?’

The refusal is on the tip of your tongue. You don’t say yes to a whole lot nowadays, other than when Lucy makes you. But then you hear yourself ask, a challenge in your voice that you didn’t know you had. ‘I don’t know. Are you any good with your hands, Joel Miller?’

At the boldness in your words, which you don’t take back, Joel’s eyebrows reach for his hairline. Biting your lip but standing your ground, you watch him grind his jaw as he considers his response. 

‘Why don’t you try me, sweetheart?’

‘Like this?’

‘Wait - slow down.’

A shuffle of hands. ‘How about now?’

‘That’s it. Yes, that’s good. Keep going.’

A raspy grunt. ‘I think I’m almost there.’

‘Yeah, that’s right, don’t stop -’

‘Alright, you ready?’

‘Come on, Joel -’

With one last flick, the knife slices clean through the base of the stalk, and Joel plucks the cauliflower head out of its leafy cradle with a triumphant grin.

‘How’s that for good hands, huh?’ he crows. 

‘I’ll get back to you in the fall when we see if the cauliflower grows back,’ you tease. 

He huffs, squinting up at you through the sun. ‘You’re hard to please, sweetheart.’

You preen at the playful turn of the conversation. If you were a little braver, you’d give him a mischievous wink - but for now, you gesture at the patch. ‘Can you handle the rest? I’ll get started on the peppers.’

He nods. ‘Leave ‘em with me.’

The pepper plants are having a great season, standing at four feet tall and heaving with fruits. You’ve left them alone on the vine for the last three weeks to sweeten, and they have dutifully ripened into a beautiful red. Settling onto your knees, you methodologically comb through the peppers from top to bottom, cutting off each one by the stalks.

It’s a big harvest, half of which you plan on giving away to your neighbours in exchange for their berries and lemons. Some you will cook. Lucy is due to come over for dinner, and she loves your stuffed pepper recipe. The rest you’ll have to find time to roast, skin, deseed and preserve in oil, which will last the rest of the year -

A shadow falls over you, stilling your hands and drawing your eyes upwards.

The sight is familiar - feet planted shoulder-wide by your knees, chin tucked in as he stares down at you, your nose level with the front of the jeans that you picked out for him - you’ve seen it all before, except for one small detail.

Joel is sweating. A lot.

His thin plaid shirt - you’re not sure if you’ve seen him in anything else yet - is sticking to him like a second skin, clinging to the solid outline of his biceps as he holds onto the basket full of cauliflower heads. The sunlight glances off the perspiration dotting his hairline, and the wispy grays that normally curl away from his face have wilted in the humidity. 

There’s a flush under his skin as he swipes at his forehead with his shirt sleeve, and your gaze follows a bead of sweat dripping down the prominent vein on the side of his neck, and into the deep V of his shirt - wait, is that the outline of an undervest that you can just make out underneath -

‘Should I take the cauliflower in?’

‘Um -’ you stammer to a halt, eyes still plastered to the front of his chest, just like his shirt.

He clearly mistakes your gawking for something else, flashing you an apologetic smile at his state. ‘Sorry, I work up a sweat real easy.’

Oh, come on. Now all you’re thinking about is how else he works up a sweat -

Seized by the sudden need to get out of the heat in more than one sense of the word, you rip the basket from his grasp and turn on your heels to sprint into the house with a choked, ‘I’ll be right back!’

You nearly trip over your own feet running into the kitchen, your heart thumping so loudly in its ribcage it feels like the whole house is shaking to the beat. 

And all that man has done is sweat in front of you.

‘Pull yourself together, Pin,’ you mutter to yourself as you tip the cauliflower heads onto the kitchen table. Grabbing a jug from the cupboard, you put it in the sink and turn on the faucet. Watching the trickle of water, you make yourself take three deep breaths. 

Joel’s kind enough to do you a favour, you could at least have the courtesy to not perv on him while he helps you out.

Nodding determinedly to yourself, you pluck two glasses from the drying rack, putting them inside the empty basket that you hook on your elbow, and march back outside -

Only to almost swallow your tongue and drop the full jug of water right at your feet.

Joel’s sweat-soaked shirt is now hanging on your washing line like a white flag, having surrendered to the heat. And just like that, the very image that has been inconveniently seared into the back of your eyes since the party is suddenly before you in all its glory, in the morning sun, out in the open air.

The white undervest stretches over the breadth of him, and if he didn’t look so good in it, you would’ve laughed at the comical way the flimsy straps are clinging onto his shoulders for dear life. Then he bends over to inspect the tomato vines, the bottom of his vest riding up with the movement, teasing a flash of skin above the waistline of the jeans pulled tight over his behind. One big hand reaches out, the outline of his arm flexing as he does, and he palms the bottom of one tomato, testing if it’s ripe for the picking. 

Except in your head, it’s something else he’s cupping with such rapturous attention. 

He doesn’t notice you until he stands up with a low grunt of effort. Pointing an apologetic finger at his shirt, he says, ‘I hope you don’t mind, I’m sweatin’ right through it like nobody’s business.’

You make a noise in your throat that you pass off as an answer, and with shaky hands, pour him a full glass of water which you shove in his direction.

‘Appreciate it, sweetheart.’ He salutes you and takes a long drag, tipping his head back. You watch, transfixed, as the sunlight bounces off the lines of sweat criss-crossing down the strong column of his neck, and the hard bob of his Adam’s apple as he swallows.

Suddenly, you’re parched. But you don’t trust yourself to stay upright, let alone pour yourself a drink.

‘It’s hot today,’ Joel breaks the loaded silence, though it’s possible that it’s unilaterally so on your side.

‘Uh-huh,’ you croak, still holding onto the water jug like a shield.

He peers at you with a touch of mischief. ‘You ain’t gonna swoon or anythin’ are you?’

Probably. And definitely not for the reason he has in mind. 

You attempt a weak smile that may have come off as a grimace. ‘I’ll try not to.’

Reassured, he nods towards the garlic patch. ‘C’mon. Let’s get our hands dirty, sweetheart.’

By the time the vegetable patch has been thoroughly picked and the baskets crammed full, the sun is high in the sky, the morning clouds burned off with the heat.

Joel isn’t the only one who’s sweating through his clothes - your light cotton top is now clinging uncomfortably to your skin, sweat dripping down your sternum and dampening the cups of your bra. You heave a sigh of relief when he helps you move the haul to a shaded corner near the porch where you have an outdoor sink and wheel hose installed.

Emptying the root vegetables into the sink, Joel steps back and casts a critical eye over the rain gutters that line the eaves of your house. Fingers spread over one jutting hip, he leans his weight on his right leg, the stance creating all kinds of angles that are completely unnecessary in this kind of heat.

He points at the leaves and branches that are clearly sticking out from the channels, but you’re only really interested in studying his large hands. The bumps and veins on the back of them, the watch with the broken face on his left wrist, the dirt coating his thick fingers, pushed under tidily trimmed nails. The logical thought that follows is how he would leave dark streaks on your white top when he pulls you in by the waist - 

‘Looks like the gutters need cleanin’,’ Joel declares. 

Well, the gutter your head is currently dunked in can certainly do with a good scrub.

‘Rainy season doesn’t start for another few months, they can wait.’

He uh-uh's sternly. ‘I’ve heard that before. Do you have a ladder?’

‘You really don’t have to -’ you protest, but he won’t hear it.

‘It’s no big deal, I’m sweaty anyway,’ he replies. ‘Besides, you’ll be doing me a favour keepin’ me occupied. I don’t pick Ellie up till three.’

You bite your lip. ‘But I feel bad working you so hard.’

Without skipping a beat, he winks. ‘Don’t worry your pretty head, sweetheart - I like workin’ for it.’

Jesus Christ. This man needs to be locked up and the key thrown to a colony of clickers.

The inner contractor in Joel comes out to play as he climbs deftly up the extension ladder propped up against the eaves, gloves on and a tarp bag tied to the top rung for collecting the debris. Discreetly, you shuffle around the freestanding sink so that you have a clear view of him as you turn on the water and start washing the dirt off the onions.

He’s starting close by, just a couple of feet away from you, patiently scooping out the dead leaves and twigs by the handful. Up on the ladder with his side to you, you’re eye level with the swell of his belly, which stretches the seams of the vest, and the underside of it peeks out every time he reaches up for the gutters. Your cheeks warm with the memory of how the soft folds felt against you, so warm and solid that you ache to reach out, push the flimsy vest up and nuzzle the tender skin with your nose -

It takes you a couple of minutes to realise that you’re not even pretending to be washing the onions anymore, the hose running in your idle grasp as you stare, head cocked to one side.

You don’t hear him when he turns to you. ‘Can pass me the hose?’

You stare dumbly back at him. ‘Huh?’

‘The hose, Pin,’ he repeats, a playful condescension in his smirk, like he knows exactly what you’ve been looking at. ‘That onion looks sparkly clean.’

You’re not sure what happened. One second you’re holding onto the hose with the intention of turning off the water before passing it to Joel, but your brain skips that crucial first step, and the next thing you know, you’re pointing it straight at him, spraying him in water from face to chest.

As he splutters, you shove the hose into the sink and screech, mortified. ‘Oh my god! I’m so sorry!’

You watch in horror as the water trickles from his hair, down his stubbled chin and onto his chest - okay, that’s a lie. It’s definitely not horror that’s twisting in your tummy and then much, much lower between your thighs.

And if you thought this man looked good sweaty, well - you’ve seen nothing yet.

He might as well put you out of your misery and take off his undervest right about now. It’s completely see-through, pebbled nipples and the firm ridges of his pecs showing through the wet fabric, rounded out by the endearing soft pouch of his belly. 

He wears the early summer tan so well, and for the first time since the outbreak, you think about the swim club in your old neighbourhood. Watching the water drip off his skin, it’s not a stretch to imagine this man pulling himself out of the pool after a quick dip to cool down, before stretching out on a sunlounger to dry in the sun - all in slow motion, set to the track of a corny sax riff.

‘I’m sorry,’ you say on reflex, but the apology rings hollow with the way your gaze lingers over his chest, and he notices.

He chuckles, carding one hand through his wet hair to slick it back, standing taller under your eyes. ‘As I said - never a dull moment with you, sweetheart.’ 

Joel takes his time, clearing out all the blockages and hosing the gutters clean so that you don’t have to worry about them for another six months. He dumps the leaves and sticks in the compost post, rinses the soiled gloves and his hands clean, before taking his shirt off the washing line and heading into the blessed shade.

He finds you in the kitchen, back to the door, putting away clean plates and cutlery from the drying rack, porcelain knocking together and metal clanging.

This is the most he’s seen of you, in a tank top and shorts, bathed in light spilling in from the large windows that open out into the backyard. He sees touches of your workshop right here in the kitchen - dried herbs and seasoning in mismatched but tidy boxes on the shelves, knives organised by size on a magnetic knife block, plates and bowls arranged in neat stacks behind glass cabinets.

Not wanting to alarm you, he deliberately scrapes his shoe on the tiled floor to make his presence known.

Whipping around - and just a touch startled - you smile with a quiet hey, and Joel’s not sure if he’ll ever get over how the sweet shyness still clings to the curve of your lips despite the fact that he’s kissed you right there.

He stays by the door for now and says, ‘I put the ladder back, and the gutters are all done, but I spotted some shingles missing on the roof while I was up there. I’ll come back to fix ‘em some other time.’

‘Thank you so much Joel, but really, don’t worry about the roof. You’ve done enough.’

‘You basically got Ellie outta my hair every Saturday for the next few months, so I’ll have plenty of time to kill,’ he half-jokes.

A comfortable lull sets in, and he looks up at the ticking clock, surprised that it’s almost noon. Shifting his feet, he opens his mouth and is about to excuse himself when you blurt out, ‘I’m sorry I soaked you.’

The jury's out on who's more taken aback by your phrasing. Exasperated, you groan, ‘I did not mean to say that.’

Joel’s kept a respectful distance since he arrived at the house, the pliant weight of you in his arms and your taste on his tongue kept firmly at bay in the back of his mind, not wanting to bring up anything that would make you uncomfortable in the light of day. But now, he pushes himself off the threshold of the door and crosses the cosy kitchen, pleased that you stay put when he plants himself in front of you, toe to toe.

Brushing a finger under your chin so that you’re staring up at him, he deliberately pitches his voice low and gruff, the double entendre almost crude in its delivery. ‘Just so we’re clear, you can soak me any time, sweetheart, in any way you want.’

Your lips part and your gaze darkens, and he feels his body instinctively react, invisible threads reeling him bodily into you. When you speak, your voice quivers, his name at once a single-worded reprimand and a needy whine that takes him right back to his brother’s spare bedroom. ‘Joel -’

‘Yes, Pin?’ he baits you playfully, just like he did that night, taking one last step so that you’re crowded against the countertop, bookending you with his palms planted on the wooden surface.

Finally shedding that last bit of shyness holding you back, you retort with no real bite, ‘You’re such a tease, Miller.’

‘Don’t pretend you don’t enjoy it,’ he quips easily, his attention on your mouth. He hears your shaky intake of air, the whole moment suspended on tenterhooks as you skirt each other on the brink -

Just then, a breeze drifts in from the open window above the sink, providing instant relief from the humidity that hangs heavy in the air. All of a sudden, he’s acutely aware of the fact that he’s sweaty all over, so much so that he might actually smell. 

Self-conscious, he clears his throat and murmurs ‘I should probably go, I need a shower and a change of clothes -’

‘You can shower here,’ you interrupt, stumbling over your words in your haste. ‘I have a spare shirt somewhere.’

You don’t need to ask him twice. 

He smiles. ‘Sounds good, sweetheart.’

Your ensuite bathroom, like what he has seen of your house, is clean and organised. There’s a neat stockpile of soap bars in the cupboard, and he spots the familiar bottles of regulation shampoo and toothpaste that the town mass produces.

The water is plenty hot as he efficiently lathers himself top to bottom and front to back, but the pressure is a bit weak for his liking and can be easily fixed. Something else to add to the list.

The towel you left on the rack is soft and smells like the sun. Patting himself dry and rubbing it through his hair, he wipes away the condensation off the mirror above the sink. He peers at his reflection, ruminating that it’s time for a shave, and pushes back his wet hair so the strands don’t get in his eyes.

Out of his clothes, only his jeans are passably dry, so he forgoes his boxers and pulls them on, carefully doing up the zipper. Using his shirt as a sling, he bundles up all the dirty clothes and opens the bathroom door.

He catches you coming into the bedroom as he steps out, and your jaw drops at the sight of him in just his jeans before you slap your palms dramatically over your eyes, the tshirt you’re holding onto covering your whole face and muffling your voice. ‘I’m so sorry! I should’ve knocked!’

Joel chuckles at your reaction. ‘Sweetheart, it's your house. And I’m not exactly naked.’

Lowering your hands sheepishly, you still clutch the tshirt to your chest like a security blanket, admitting, ‘Sorry, I just - I just realised I’ve never had a man in here before.’

Something wraps itself around his stomach and pulls, and it takes him a beat to put a name to it because it’s been so long. It’s possessiveness that rushes through his veins and goes straight to his head, and he has to bite the inside of his mouth to keep his voice from wavering. He demands, ‘Never?’

‘Never.’

He lets the word wash over him, appeasing the beast in him for now. With a slow nod, he takes three measured steps towards you, stopping just an arm’s length away. Gently coaxing you to let go of the purple tshirt, he snorts at the huge Lakers logo blazoned across the front. 

He quips, ‘I’m more of a Longhorns fan myself, actually.’

The tension cracks, and you grin back, ‘Well, not anymore.’

After your confession, it’s probably redundant, but he wants to hear you say it. Flashing the tshirt at you, he asks, ‘Old boyfriend’s?’

It’s the most personal question that’s been exchanged between you so far by a mile, and it’s probably none of his business, but you can’t explain why your pulse spikes at the way his normally warm gaze hardens with something unfamiliar.

‘No,’ you answer. ‘I keep some of the stock here when there’s not enough room at the shop, that’s all.’

Joel rasps, ‘Good.’

With that one syllable, his shoulders visibly relax, suddenly drawing your attention to his topless form, which you’ve been too mortified to actually look at. It’s a lot to take in, and even though you’ve seen most of him already, there is one conspicuous part that you haven’t yet -

But before your eyes can trail that low, Joel turns. ‘Thanks, I appreciate it. I’ll just -’

You’re slow to catch onto why he trails off in the middle of the sentence, still far too distracted by his general state of undress to notice until he’s already made his way to the top of your neatly made bed. And then you see it…

The flannel peeking out from underneath the duvet.

Oh. Fuck.

With an almost flippant flick of his wrist, Joel peels back the corner of the bedspread. Wordlessly, he stares down at the red plaid shirt he lent you at the baby shower, tucked snugly in your bed, buried half under your pillow. 

He stares at it for so long that you interrupt the silence for once.

‘I’ve been meaning to return it,’ you squeak, hands flailing awkwardly, desperately wanting something to hold onto. ‘I just - forgot.’

Joel half-turns to you, arching an eyebrow. ‘You’ve been keepin’ it in your bed?’

Backed into a corner - and you’re not proud of it - you lie. Outrageously. ‘I don’t know how it got in there.'

He picks up the shirt by the collar. It’s wrinkled all over and obviously worn in. He smirks, ‘I’m not so sure about that.’

You’re this close to swivelling around and making a break for it, but as soon as your axis of balance tilts backwards, Joel grabs you by the wrist and pulls you in, hauling you firmly into his bare chest.

‘You’ve been wearin’ it to sleep, haven’t you?’ he asks in a tone that brooks no argument. 

Your fingers curl into his chest, his skin blazing warm under your palms. There’s no point fibbing anymore, and you admit, ‘Yes.’

His voice is hoarse when he asks, ‘You wear anythin’ underneath it, sweetheart?’

You hold your breath for one long moment, the tension in the room swelling so quickly that your ears pop. Eventually, under his patient yet heated stare, you shake your head, lips sealed.

His pupils dilate and his nostrils flare, and you feel his grip on your hips tighten.

‘No bra?’ he prompts.

‘No bra,’ you parrot back.

His jaw clenches so tightly that you’re surprised he manages to articulate his next question. ‘No panties?’

‘No panties -’

You barely get the word out before Joel is kissing you, pushing the syllables right back into your mouth until you swallow them with a whimper.

And then he’s pulling back, growling against yours, ‘And what do you do naked in my shirt, hmm?’

You stutter, ‘I - I think about you -’

An undignified squeal escapes you when he suddenly spins you around, your back hitting the bed, denying you the chance to catch your breath. The ceiling fan turns directly above you, but it does nothing to quell the heat between your bodies as Joel clambers over you on his hands and knees, sliding his mouth over yours again in a hard kiss.

You always thought your bed was a decent size, but now, with the bulk of this man hovering over you, you’re not so sure anymore. His ridiculously wide shoulders fill your entire field of vision, and even though he’s holding himself up with his forearms by your ears, you can almost feel the full weight of him through sheer anticipation of his touch. 

His heated words brush by your ear, making you shudder. ‘Tell me what you think about, sweetheart.’

‘Your arms, your shoulders -’ you hesitate, dropping your voice shyly. ‘Your belly.’

Joel looks taken aback. ‘My belly?’

You duck your head almost guiltily. ‘Yes.’

His brows draw together in an endearingly confused frown. ‘Why?’

‘That time in the workshop, when we met, you were sucking it in so hard you could hardly breathe - but you don’t anymore.’

The dots connect, and his lips part in an oh. ‘I didn’t even realise.’

‘I know. That’s why it’s sexy,’ you point out.

He looks at you incredulously, as if you’ve lost your mind. ‘My belly is sexy?’

You grin. ‘Yes, and your confidence. You walk differently now, you know.’

He makes a noise at the back of his throat, a self-satisfied smirk tilting his lips upwards. ‘You been watchin’ me?’

‘Maybe,’ you tease.

You exhale long and heavy through your nose when he sucks delicately on your bottom lip, opening you up so that he can dip inside, stealing a taste of your tongue with his. 

‘Been thinkin’ about you all week, sweetheart,’ he whispers, trailing fire across your cheek and the hollow behind your ear. 

‘I haven’t seen you around at all,’ you whine, tipping your head back as he nudges the tip of his proud nose down your throat.

‘I know, it took three fuckin’ days to clean up after the party,’ he complains, his disgruntled tone prompting a giggle from you. ‘Never again.’

‘I’m not so sure about that. There will be plenty of birthday parties to look forward to, Uncle Joel -’

An open-mouthed kiss on the side of your neck catches you off guard, the unfamiliar texture of the wet suction and scrape of his teeth jolts you clean off the mattress, sending you body slamming into his ribcage.

Joel hums, pleased at your reaction. ‘So sensitive. I’ve barely touched you yet, sweetheart.’

It’s immediate, the shame that burns under your skin at his remark despite knowing he doesn’t mean anything by it, and Joel frowns at the way you stiffen under him. Regret colours his words as he cups your cheek. ‘Pin, I’m sorry, that came out wrong -’

‘No, that’s the thing. You’re not wrong,’ you interrupt with a shake of your head. There’s no point denying it - you’re a grown woman, and there’s something fundamentally embarrassing about losing touch with that part of yourself over the years. ‘I - it’s been so long, I don’t even know my own body anymore.’

His eyes dip downwards and slowly, over the curve of your breasts and the arch of your back. With an encouraging smile, he argues, ‘I’m not sure about that. Looks like your body’s reactin’ perfectly to me.’

Your lips twitch despite yourself. ‘You’re just saying that to get into my pants.’

He takes the unexpected turn in the conversation in stride and runs with it. ‘Trust me, sweetheart, if I were tryin’, I’d already be in them.’

‘You’re such an ass, Joel Miller.’

His roguish grin has you squirming and fisting the sheets underneath you. ‘I dunno. Somethin’ tells me you like it.’

Wrapping one palm on the back of his neck, you drag him into you again, relishing in the weight of him as he pins you to the bed with the broad frame of his shoulders. He moans into your mouth, claiming it with deep strokes of his tongue, while his calloused palms sneak under the hem of your shirt and pull you into him by the small of your back.

Even as your hips buck, begging for friction, Joel holds back, propping himself up on his knees to keep a tenuous grip on his self-control. Pulling back from your lips with a wet pop, he assures you through heavy breaths, ‘We can stop any time, sweetheart. Just say the word.’

Your response comes fast and sure, but he can read the hesitance between the lines, ‘I - I don’t want to stop.’

He presses a patient kiss to your lips, but backs away before you can deepen it. ‘How about this - we’ll flip you over so that you’re on top, and you decide what you want to do. Is that ok?’

You pause to consider his proposal, sliding your tongue over your bottom lip - he’s this close to kissing you right there and then. You ask shyly, ‘And it’s ok if we - you know, just make out?’

He smiles. ‘I can do with some good old-fashioned neckin’.’

‘Ok then -’

You yelp when Joel turns you over without warning, the sudden movement making your head spin. Sitting up against the headboard, he drags you in his lap and asks, ‘Alright?’

You nod with a nervous smile. It’s intimidating, being so close to him that there’s nowhere else to look but into his thoughtful eyes that are watching you for any signs of discomfort. Catching your breath, you settle into the moment and realise that you’re straddling him, hands clinging onto his shoulders, knees sinking into the mattress on either side of his hips. His belly is warm and soft where he’s pressed up against you, but lower, nudging insistently between your legs -

Joel is hard.

The revelation robs you of air, want and need rushing like blood to your head, and you stiffen, not knowing what to do.

Joel catches on - you’re beginning to think that nothing ever escapes him - and he reminds you, ‘Just kissin’, ok, sweetheart?’

Snapping out of your freeze frame, you nod, ‘Yes. Ok.’

Giving you somewhere to start, he prompts, ‘Where do you want my hands?’

Tugging on his wrists, you watch his jaw go slack when you place his palms squarely on your ass, where your denim shorts hardly cover the top of your thighs. He lets out a lewd moan at the way your soft curves fill his hands, fingers squeezing and kneading greedily, and you push your hips back into his contact. 

‘Not so shy after all, hmm?’ he rasps.

You preen at his praise, and riding the wave of boldness, you tip forward and press your lips to Joel’s before you could overthink it. Over the roar of blood in your ears, you hear him suck in a shaky breath, and you feel the deep groan in his throat taper into a whimper when you swipe your tongue into his mouth.

You’re completely unprepared for the power the sound unleashes in you.

Somewhere in your consciousness, a door is cracked open, and memory crackles at the edges of your mind. Each shuddered breath shared, every slide of skin on skin, brings to the surface what you thought you’d forgotten. 

Your fingers burrow into the still wet locks at his nape, earning a loud moan from Joel when you pull on the grays that have distracted you on more than one occasion. He nips his way sloppily down your neck, trailing spit and beard burn as he goes, while your palms skate over his chest and down, down, down until your fingernails drag over the pliant folds of his tummy, hanging over the waistband of his jeans.

‘Sweetheart,’ he groans brokenly at the contact, forehead knocking into yours.

Spreading your fingers over soft flesh, you choke on an inhale when he bodily rocks into your palms. Your thumb catches the hollow of his belly button, fingers tenderly squeezing the creases and dimples of his belly. His eyes crack open under tightly knitted eyebrows, vulnerability etched in every line on his face.

Something shifts - something that neither of you can take back. And suddenly, it’s not just kissing anymore.

Caught somewhere between writhing instinctively under his touch and a deliberate pursuit of friction, your hips find a rhythm that has the seat of your panties quickly twisting and dampening as you grind on the erection straining against the zipper of his jeans.

Blunt nails bite into your thighs as Joel growls, ‘Shit, sweetheart. That’s it.’

You want to bury your face in his neck, feeling too wanton in the way you’re panting in needy whimpers, but he preempts that on no uncertain terms. ‘I want to see everythin’. Look at me.’

You do just that - you can’t deny this man even if you tried - watching him watch you with his pupils blown wide and wild, wetting his bottom lip the same time his eyes drop to your tits, as if he can see right through the thin fabric. He doesn’t touch you anywhere else though, his hands staying where you put them. You can feel his grip dig harder and harder into the swell of your ass, but he doesn’t try to change your rhythm, giving you free rein to ride him any way you need.

When your peripheral vision starts to go, you know it’s not a coincidence that your thoroughly soaked panties shift and strain against your clit, pinching it just so that you cry out, hips faltering.

Joel bares his teeth, and you feel his hips rut upwards into you, his restraint slipping. ‘There you go. You’re close, aren’t you?’

You can only nod, frantically grinding into him now, your whole mind narrowing until the only thought that remains is chasing that high that you can almost taste. Everything swells, electricity fills the air, his name a sacred chant on your tongue as you claw at his back, teetering precariously on the brink of something that promises to devastate you.

‘Joel, Joel, Joel -’

He catches you when you break - you fling yourself at him, knocking into him so hard that the back of his head hits the wall, but he doesn’t even flinch. Tucked safely into the crook of his neck, you whine and wail as you thrash in his hold, and his nostrils flare at your scent. He can smell you, he can smell the slick leaking from your pussy, humid and heady in the air between you, making his mouth water as he aches to taste you - all of you. 

One day.

Right now, the hinge of his jaw almost cracks as you milk the last remnants of your orgasm with a needy swivel of your hips, rubbing against his cock at an angle that makes his vision swim, and he knows he’s too far gone. His control slips like shifting sands, and a primal instinct takes over as he bucks roughly into you, fingertips leaving imprints in your skin that you will feel for days after.

‘Oh fuck, sweetheart, wait, I’m - shit, I’m gonna -’

When it hits him, it’s fucking relentless - he cums and cums until his voice goes hoarse with your name, until it feels like his abdomen would cave in and collapse, spurting and spilling until it feels like he’s turned inside out. It goes everywhere, thick, milky strands filling the gaps in his jeans and sliding down his legs in a sticky mess, and he slumps bonelessly into the headboard, panting against your lips as he catches his breath.

Sweetly, gently, he tilts his chin up just enough to kiss you, his nose nudging your cheek intimately when he pulls away, his lungs too deprived of air to keep going. He winces when you shift above him, knowing that you can feel the wet spot pooling under your bare thighs.

Joel breaks the sluggish silence first, cracking a grin. ‘So much for just makin’ out.’

You clumsily climb off his lap and crash land sideways onto the mattress. ‘Is that a complaint, Joel Miller?’

He drapes a heavy arm over you and pulls back you flush into him. ‘Well, these jeans are fuckin’ ruined. I want a refund.’

‘I’m afraid we don’t accept cum-stained returns. Store policy.’

He pffts. ‘Damnit. Should’ve read the fine print.’

You grin. ‘Well, at least there's something deeply poetic about cumming in the jeans that I picked out for you.’

‘Touché, sweetheart,’ he grunts and presses a kiss to your forehead. Glancing down at the unmistakable wet patch on the denim, he asks hopefully, ‘Any chance you got some pants I can borrow?’

Ellie bounces her leg irritably, hunched over on the stairs exactly where Joel was sitting this morning. Where the fuck is he? He’s twenty minutes late, and he had the nerve to get all huffy when she lied about the start time today. Unbelievable.

Moodily looking left and right, there’s still no sign of him. She’s about to give up and wait for him at home when something conspicuously purple comes to a stop in front of her. 

Her jaw hits the floor.

‘Oh. My. God.’

She’s never been high before, but she’s pretty sure this is the stuff hallucinations are made of.

This being Joel Miller in a purple tshirt with a tacky logo she doesn’t recognise printed on the front and khaki cargo shorts that cut off at the knees, holding a basket of vegetables that she’s pretty sure he doesn’t eat.

With a roll of his eyes, he snaps, ‘Shut your mouth, you’re trappin’ flies.’

Pasting on the most obnoxious grin she can muster, Ellie croons, ‘Man, don’t you look pretty.’

Turning on his heel, Joel starts walking without looking back. ‘Shut up.’

Jogging to keep up, she cackles, ‘Hey, did you fall into a wormhole and went shopping at a farmer’s market in 1999?’

‘Shut up.’

‘You really should wear shorts more often, y’know, show off those knees. And purple really is your colour, Barney!’

Joel frowns, shooting her a sidelong glare. ‘How the hell do you know who Barney is?’

Ellie shrugs. ‘What do you think they teach us at school?’

He’s the one who starts it. The quake in his shoulders would have been imperceptible to anyone else, but nowadays, there’s not much that he can hide from her. As usual, she giggles first, which trails into a squeal when Joel gives her a shove on the back, sending her stumbling over her shoes.

‘Fuck you, man!’ she snickers and basically rugby tackles him, but he barely budges, lips pulling back into a toothy grin. 

Across the street, unbeknownst to the pair, Tommy smiles to himself as he watches his big brother laugh, really laugh - the kind that has him doubling over and gasping for air through watery eyes. For the first time since the world ended, he looks up at the sky with a reassuring nod, and he knows deep down - Joel will be just fine.

Notes: You guys continue to blow me away with your support - I cannot be more grateful for all the reblogs, asks and interaction with my silly Behind the Seams posts and random updates. Thank you so so much for reading, I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and I can't wait to hear what you think ❤️

I will be having a think over the next few weeks about where Seams will go from here. This chapter wraps up the first mini story arc, and I'll be dedicating August to wrapping up my Palomino series, so it will give me some time and distance to mull over what's next for Joel and Pin. I'm also a few followers away from a big milestone, so I might have something fun planned! 🥰

[yiiyiiwrites]

| If I must be your ruin |

Summary: before the buildings ruin, Cassian knew that your love would fall the same but he was willing to fight that fate with his mate. (Some dad Cassian and uncle Azriel/Rhys too)

Cassian x summer court reader (forbidden romance) [acotar masterlist]

Before under the mountain:

Sneaking Cassian into the summer court because you prefer your silk sheets and comfy bed.

Cassian loves waking up to you in his arms, the salty breeze filtering through the open window. Veiled curtains fluttering around the bed frame, dangling shells clinking together and creating a song he hopes he never forgets.

Takes a while for both of you to take the relationship serious as you’re both forbidden from stepping in each other’s courts.

Swimming together during the full moon, taking a small boat out into the summer sea and diving from the deck.

That one time Cassian got caught and you had to flirt with the guards so that he could escape. You never heard the end of it, but it did lead to great make up sex. He teases you for it all the time.

Your older brothers don’t like Cassian because of what he did.

“It was one building! It was ugly anyways, did us all a favour.”

You’re also part of the reason for the buildings ruin, but Cassian has never mentioned it.

“I would tear down buildings for you.”

Meeting on the boundary of summer and winter, Cassian can’t step over the invisible court line. (After being caught previously it’s too risky for him and you).

So you launch into his arms not caring at the abrupt temperature change. He opens his jacket and pulls you into a crushing hug to keep you warm.

Slipping a shell in his pocket, so that he’s reminded of a piece of you when he puts his hands in there to warm up in the cold. (He doesn’t tell you that he got a seamstress to sew a shell into the lining of his pocket so that you’re always with him).

Sending Cassian a blood ruby when he’s angered you. He ends up with a collection of different cut red gems, that you both laugh about now. You only get more angry if he forgets the reason of why you sent them.

You made him a necklace with discarded fishing netting and a shard of sea glass you found washed ashore.

“If I must be your ruin,” Cassian said, hooking his finger under your chin and raising your gaze to his. “Then I will also be your salvation.”

Secret wedding, where he creates you a ring out of the first blood ruby you sent him (the only reason you sent it was because it was the exact same shade as his siphons, he got in a lot of trouble with Rhys too).

Your mating ceremony is halfway between both of your courts in dawn. Only you and cassian with a priestess that is your closet friend.

Your dress pearlescent silk, fluttering layers in the morning breeze. Pearls weaved into the waves of your hair.

“In this life and the next, my love.”

After under the mountain:

You’ve never seen Cassian under the mountain and that you are glad of.

The only thing you have of Cassian’s is a dagger, blood ruby set in the scabbard. Your ring is hidden away in the Dawn court with your priestess friend.

You’re convinced that Rhysand can scent his friend merged with yours. He even studied the dagger, but did not push any further.

It wasn’t your mate that ended up being your ruin, it was the things you had to do in order to survive.

Fifty years of yearning and you meet him back in dawn. Granted it took you a couple of years of freedom till you reached out to him. Closed yourself up in summer to try and rid yourself of the trauma.

Cassian bought you a small estate that looks out to the sea in the dawn court. Your shells and rubies decorating the driftwood mantelpiece.

Your mate is hesitant the first few visits as if he’s worried about scaring a wild animal. As if you’re made of glass.

You seek refuge in the dawn court and wait for your mates visits. The first person he brings to your shared home is Feyre. He knows that she’ll be the most understanding and will treat you with kindness.

The nightmares are few and far between when Cassian is there to hold you.

The sound of the sea crashing along the shore soothes your mind and helps you stay grounded. Your mate knows you too well.

When you do eventually get invited to Velaris, you’re surprised to see the small shells scattered around his bedroom. The ribbon from your mating ceremony in the drawer beside his bed.

The different ornate chests full of rubies tucked away at the back of his wardrobe.

Your family:

When you have children they are named after precious stones. The first a daughter Ruby, as fiery as the threat of summer and has drawn blood from her father (accidentally).

Ruby is a forced to be reckoned with when she gets older. “Well it’s not that bad, dad totalled a whole building,” Ruby smirked, eyes sliding to Feyre who bit back a laugh. “Who told you that?!” It’s turns out Rhys was the one that let that slip.

Ruby has no interest in fighting in the mountains, thinks her father and Azriel are brutes (but loves them anyways). She does however want to join the Valkyries. Very fond of Nesta and loves romance books too. Debates with Cassian on how they can help Illyrian women.

Cassian teaching Ruby to fly, she’s reluctant to learn but he takes a more softer approach and asks feyre to help out too.

Obsessed with Pegasus in the day court that she begs you to take her there whenever you have diplomatic work.

Asks Rhys to put in a good word with Helion so that she can study in the day courts library. Ruby sends Cassian war books that she’s read and add sticky tabs for parts she thinks her dad will like. Sends you precious stones with a note. “Whatever you do, do not call any of my future siblings after this one.”

A son Jett, who is so protective of his siblings and his mother when you fall pregnant with a third one. He doesn’t give too much away, his stony face unmoving as if he’s spent too much time with uncle Azriel enjoying the quiet (which he doesn’t get at home thanks to ruby).

Jett’s the only one that wants to train in the Illyrian mountains like his father and uncles. Grew up playing with a wooden sword before he even learnt to fight.

Cassian doesn’t let Jett go to the Illyrian mountains till he’s trained to a high standard. Knows his son will be a target for people to prove they are better than him. So wants to give him a fighting chance before he’s left to his own devices.

Play fights with Rhys as a kid and gets in a good few swipes before you and Feyre are telling them both to calm down.

Jett asking Cassian to tell him of his adventures putting away monsters in the prison before bed.

Azriel is the one to teach Jett to fly, Cassian too nervous as he falls each time. Jett can’t do it with too many distractions, values silence and figuring it out himself instead of people telling him what to do. He ends up going out alone and mastering it himself…which earns him a scolding from you and Cassian.

Pearl, she loves the ocean that her first steps were paddling in the shallow waves at the beach. Free spirited and loves to fish with Feyre and Rhys. Whether it be looking for shells or sea glass or searching for a crab in the rock pools.

Pearl is the only one without wings, you tell her it’s so that she can swim and follow the mermaids in the ocean. She’s a spitting image of you as a child and it’s like you’re meeting yourself again for the first time.

Pearl has no spatial awareness when it comes to wings. She’s always getting swatted by her siblings wings and she likes to play a game where she hides behind Cassian’s wings, all that can be heard is her giggles.

Azriel took Pearl flying because he didn’t want her to miss out when her siblings were learning to fly (he may have dropped her few times as he mentioned how many times Jett fell whilst learning…he always caught her maybe even dropped her again just to hear her little giggles).

His girls braiding his hair and adding little shells and strands of string. Cassian definitely learns how to do their hair too. He even massages your hair before he braids yours too and the girls whine asking him to do that to them as they undo the ribbon holding their braids.

You live in Dawn during winter and spring, as you can’t handle the cold weather. Summer and autumn in Velaris, a top floor apartment in the art district overlooking a lake. It’s smaller than your home in dawn, but you spend more time outside on the rooftop patio than inside.

Your children visiting your brothers in Summer during the hottest time of the year so that they can see where you grew up.

Ruby rejects her mate, an Illyrian brute that doesn’t value her intellect or cares for her opinion. She falls in love with a scholar from the day court and lives out the rest of her life there. She doesn’t visit you and cassian for a few years thinking that you are not happy with the rejection as she knows that mates are sacred. But you make it known that her happiness is all that matters.

Jett’s mate, a peregryne in the aerial legion. They meet across the battle field during war and spend years trying to find each other. Nothing but letters going back and forth whilst they fulfil their respective duties.

Pearl meets her mate in the Summer court. A way finder, he was pulling a fishing net up in the middle of the sea when he saw Pearl swimming by.

Hope you liked….I thought about this way too much after thinking of it ages ago :)

[beloved-child-of-the-house]

@thehoneybeet tagged me to say what my various drarries do to celebrate Christmas/the holidays (tysm I rlly wanted to be tagged 🥹). Read their version here.

Queen of the Weeds - Harry loves to cook and bake and he’s trying to teach Draco to cook, so he probably comes up with some kind of cooking challenge where they have to make something different every day in December. Draco hears a snippet of the Nutcracker over the tannoy in some shop or other, and he is immediately Enchanted. Harry finds a local performance of the ballet to take him to and gives him a recording of the music for Christmas. And obviously they’re furiously recording mixtapes.

If the Fates Allow - I see them hosting! Harry sews them both a new outfit for the occasion, and they invite everyone they can think of. It’s So Loud even before Teddy starts pulling crackers with Victoire. Everybody gets tipsy and they sing wizarding carols together ans half the guests stay over because they’re having such a good time that they stay too late to travel home that night.

A Forgivable Fascination - Way too busy with their research (inventing new forms of magic and doing weird sex about it) to host. They go to Ron and Hermione’s Christmas party and 🫣 they leave early. They have a codeword between them that means they’re leaving to bone, and it’s transparently obvious to all their friends that they’re doing so.

Imperio - They go on like a skiing vacation and have boozy hot chocolate and noisy sex in some chalet.

The Tune Without the Words - If they haven’t gotten back together yet, Harry keeps startling and changing into a dove when Draco accidentally on purpose keeps coming to the same Christmas parties as him.

A Bottomless Well - They’re like stupid ridiculous rich because of Draco’s invention, so they give annoyingly extravagant presents to their friends’ kids AND they get the kids all overexcited by romping with them too hard.

A Gift of True Esteem - Since they’re both Hogwarts professors, they have 2 weeks off, so for the first week, they usually go stay at the Palace of Beauxbatons and go to Madame Maxime’s Christmas party and get drunk with Hagrid and dance like fools. For the second week, they hole up back at Hogwarts for the coziest activities they can think of and probably invite Ash Greengrass to visit (and he’s soooooo smug about them getting married too). Harry also really likes ghost stories for Christmas, so he combs the library for them, and they take turns reading them aloud for each other. At some point, they visit Ron and Hermione, because Harry is doing his best not to be a stranger. They give lavish gifts to Rosie, Hugo, and young Miss Fredericka Faline Weasley.

The Joy of Bleeding - Draco feels Some Type of Way about the holidays after losing his mom. They go to the Burrow and they spend time with Andromeda and Teddy. It’s hard for them, both being orphans. They keep things low key and try to be gentle with themselves and each other.

Homing - Draco’s family doesn’t speak to him anymore, so Harry likes to do the traditions Draco misses from his childhood. They go ice skating on Christmas morning. They sing the songs Draco remembers from his childhood. Harry bravely attempts peacock pie one year. They do have a new tradition of spending Christmas Eve at Fetê.

Names For a House - They like to make a big fuss over Theodore when he comes home from Hogwarts. They plan lots of activities to do together, and they try to make sure that Theo sees lots of Victoire, since she’s at Beauxbatons and they don’t get to spend much time together during the school year. Sometimes the full moon is close to Christmas, and Draco and Theo have to take it easy. Usually when that happens, everyone gets into the same bed (including Shadowfax) and they watch movies together all day. Often a Star Wars marathon bc they all love the original trilogy.

Propinquity - They always have a big party at the Grotto! Pansy sort of took over the planning while they were in Paris, so they barely even have to lift a finger anymore. Their house is simply filled with people. All they have to do is hide the honeymoon box and make sure nobody else makes the same mistake Harry made. Sometimes Draco will play the piano (mostly Britney Spears tbh).

Moonrise - After they leave Grimmauld Place, they don’t host so much because the cottage is too small for any group much larger than the classic gang. But they’ll get everyone to come down to the Three Broomsticks, and there’s always some lovely live entertainment around the holidays. Draco exchanges Christmas cards with his friends from the Citizens Committee for the Ethical Treatment of Lycanthropes. They usually wind up at the Burrow for the day of. Harry helps Molly cook the meal, and Draco sneaks off the get high with Ginny and Fleur. Toad gets underfoot and helpfully licks up any scraps that fall on the floor. If it’s not too cold for the little ones, they go caroling in the village.

ahhhh that was fun! Genuinely do not remember who has already gone and who hasn’t. I’ll tag @drarry (it’ll be Yule tho, right?) and @saintgarbanzo and @skeptiquewrites and @moonmanatee and whoever else wants to play!!

[ldysmfrst]

Was it Fate?

This is a reader request by @bethanysnow, who holds membership to my Patreon. Her request is as follows:

"I have a request~ what about San from Ateez getting paired up on a variety show with a designer that is getting popular in South Korea?? For plus size fashion? And I can totally see him just falling head over heels for her~ ^-^"

This is my first ever Reader Request, and I am more than happy to fulfill it as Bethany has been my main support for my story, American Mate!

Pairing: Idol!San x Plus-sized FemReader

Status: Reader Request, One-shot

Word Count: 11,194

Genre: Variety Show Fluff

Warnings: None

Thank you to @cyaspeedy and @animatedglittergraphics-n-more for this story's artwork and banners.

As a plus-sized woman, you intimately understood the challenges of finding stylish and comfortable clothing. The sleek jumpsuits, the simple evening gowns, and the flowy summer dresses that were supposedly one-size-fits-all never quite fit the bill for you. It was this personal struggle that sparked your realization that clothes were an art form, and you were ready to create your masterpiece.

Your decision to launch a clothing line exclusively for plus-sized women was a game-changer. It was a mission that resonated with many, and it took numerous visits with investors and hours of hand sewing before your line took off. The unexpected support from the long-standing House of Schiaparelli propelled your mission to new heights. While the House of Schiaparelli offers women the essence of bold style and timeless allure, your mission was clear–“Everybody deserves clothes they feel good in.”

Your brand's success was a whirlwind. In just 11 months, 17 days, and 18 styles later, you had a summer line ready to go. Your diligence and unique aesthetic caught the attention of some of the nation's top photographers and production directors. Once you pitched the idea to the producing director, it only took a few days to get the ball rolling. 

Like most advertisements, you were blessed to work with some of the top Idols. However, unlike most brands that stuck with just one Idol or one Idol group, you wanted some from different groups because it supported your ideals of inclusion. Your concept was a couple having a date at a cat cafe; your love of furry pets is never-ending, which is reflected not only in your design but also in the ads.

While you had been a fan of K-pop music for many years, you found it easy to work with the different Idols. BamBam from GOT7 ended up adopting a cat from the cafe. Lisa from BlackPink surprised many, but her love for cats and the group's support for the LGBTQ+ community perfectly fit your brand's mission to include everyone. However, it was shocking that your advertisement also included Lee Know of Stray Kids and Yoongi from BTS. 

Soon, your commercial played on screens nationwide, from Doota Mall to Starfield COEX Mall and even Lotte Department Store. 

“Alright, can we please stick together this time?” Hongjoong requests the other members. “We really don’t want to leave Wooyoung at the mall again.”

“Hey! That was a one-time thing, captain!” whines Wooyoung, making the others laugh. 

Shopping with the other members was always easier for San. Despite his onstage presence, he was, is, and will always be an introvert. San has often seen videos of the group with remarks about Ateez being out and about and San looking more like their manager rather than another member. 

This fact makes San proud because he is all about being comfortable and looking good. Yeah, he wears clothes onstage to showcase himself for Atiny, and he loves it. In his everyday life, though, he likes to be comfortable in baggy hoodies and pants, loose shirts, and things that make him feel good but not showy.

Mosing around the mall with the other members, having already bought what he came for, San sees a new ad with Lee Know. Having worked with Stray Kids during Kingdom: Legendary War, he became close with Minho and Felix. Now that he thinks about it, Minho mentioned a new job that he thought San would be perfect for, but he was out of the country at Coachella and couldn’t join. 

Stopping to watch the ad as it replays, the most angelic voice comes over, explaining this was the laugh of a new line called “Byeol” by Y/n, which is exclusively making a one-size-fits-all for plus-sized women. The clothing is eye-catching and flattering. The concept of the ad is charming, and at the end of the ad is you. 

Your hair and makeup are done simply while you are wearing a lovely pant jumper that showcases the curves of your hips, the thickness of your thighs, and the beauty of your bare shoulders. When you say the closing statement, “Byeol, a plus-sized clothing line to make any woman a star because everyone deserves clothes they feel good in,” a smile seals the deal for San.

The visual component of the ad showcasing his friend and a lovely plus-sized woman in a summer dress at a Cat Cafe is long forgotten. The only thing of importance is you, the one who has stolen his breath and heart.

What San also forgets is the rest of his group. It doesn’t take long before Wooyoung realizes the dance master is missing, “Where did San go?”

“Dude, its either you or him that always gets sidetracked by shiny things. Hwa, can you find him please?” Hongjoong asks.

“Fine, but I am taking Woo with me. I swear he has a built-in San finder.” Grabbing the member mentioned, the two go off to find San, “Meet you back at the van!”

Turning a few corners, the two find San staring at the ad as it replays. Wooyoung bumps into San, “Hey San, what's up why did you stop?”

Breaking the stupor he had fallen into, San looks at the two members with a huge blushing smile, “Oh sorry, I just… well, look.” He points to the ad, drawing the attention of his best friend/soulmate and Seonghwa. Once you appear on the screen, it clicks. Both of them snap their attention back to San to watch his face light up and blush color his cheeks. 

“Oh, I see what stopped you. The pretty designer has caught our Sannie’s attention, I see,” remarks Seonghwa teasingly. Wiggling his eyebrows at the younger member, he said, “Y/n, I haven’t heard of that name before.”

“She is new. This is her first line of clothes called ‘Byeol,’” San says while watching you on the ad, wanting to memorize everything he can. 

“She named her line the same name as your cat? Do you think she is an Atiny?” Wooyoung asks. 

“I don't know, but I wanna shoot myself for not pushing for that ad campaign that Minho tried to get me on. I think it was this one. I could have met her, spoken to her even.” San laments. 

“Maybe Minho has a way to contact her, ya know? We are able to get in touch with our brands. I am sure he has a way.” Hwa, always the mother, says with hope.

“That’s right! I have to call him!” San lights up.

“But first let’s get out of here before people start wondering why three guys are staring at women’s clothes and word gets out that we are pervy, okay?” Hwa pushes the other playfully.

Several days have passed, and San is no closer to finding you than he was standing in the mall. Calling Minho had been a bust because, unlike most brands, your brand didn’t want to have long-term ambassadors. Minho mentioned that you seemed to live simply and cared for everyone there like they were your family. Paying for everything, and even holding a party at the end for everyone where you gave everyone a red envelope. 

While he loved hearing how generous and caring you were, he did not love Minho’s affectionate tone whenever he talked about you. Was he interested in you, too, or was it just because of the great experience? Oh no, what if you had someone already?  What if you didn’t want an Idol? What if you wanted someone like Lisa? 

While it drove his bandmates up the wall, San pretty much had all of your advertisements running on replay, but now he was driving himself up the wall without being able to find a way to contact you. You had no social media accounts, your brand’s website was simplistic, and the contact number was for a messaging service. At this point, if it wasn’t for Minho seeing you, one might think you were AI.

Ring Ring

“Hello?” 

“Hey Sannie, it’s Felix.”

“Oh hey, Lix. I am not really in the mood to chat right now.”

“Yeah, I know. Minho and Woo mentioned you have been really down lately because you cannot find Y/n, right?”

“Seriously, they are telling other people?”

“We all care about you, Sannie. Especially Woo, and you should know that. But I think I may have good news for you. Woo said something about you guys taking a small break to get ready for your world tour right?”

“Yeah. Captain thought it would be a good idea. Be fresh and ready for Atiny in America. But what does that have to do with anything?”

“Would you be interested in doing something solo for half of that time? Say a variety show with me and Y/n?”

“No way! How? When?”

“The producers just booked me yesterday, and I happened to run into Y/n and found out she was going to join it as the ‘new up and comer.’ Something about trying to show the world that there are things worse in life than being chubby.”

“That is great! But Lix, how am I going to get on?”

“It turns out S. Coups from Seventeen was supposed to join, but his knee hasn’t healed enough, and now they are short an Idol. So, I may have dropped your name. They should be reaching out soon, and filming starts at the end of next week. Just a heads up.”

“LIXXIE! No way! I have to pack, I have to get a hold of my manager, I have to… I have to go!”

“Bye Sannie see you next week I guess.”

~One-on-one Interview with Y/n~

“Okay, sit there and face the camera. It will be a simple interview. You got this,” the MC, who you recently learned is Sung Hanbin from the new K-pop group ZeroBaseOne. 

Nodding, you sit down, the production team milling around while fixing things like hair, makeup, wardrobe, and who knows what else. “Sorry, this is my first time doing anything even close to this.”

“Not to worry. You were requested by almost everyone here because of your ad campaign and the high marks you got for your debut line. This is my first time hosting a variety show, so we can both have our first together. Let’s start. Fighting”

The lights around the set dim, leaving you and Hanbin in bright stage lights. 

“Hello and welcome to YouPlusMe, the newest variety show where up-and-comers take on challenges with some of the industry's most famous idols. Let us meet one of the “newbies.” She has taken the fashion world by storm with her bubbly personality, strong values, and unwavering determination. It’s time to be the powerhouse behind The house of Y/l/n and the mastermind of “Byeol”, Miss Y/l/n Y/N.”

“Hello! Everyone! I am excited and nervous to be here. I am Y/n. Thank you for all your upcoming support in my first variety show adventure.”

“Miss Y/n, it’s been only a week since your launch and you are already the talk of the town. What makes Byoel so interesting?”

“I think my mission statement and line challenges the conservative fashion views not only here but around the world. Being the talk of the town, as you put it, has brought both positive and negative conversations. I believe that you can be healthy and beautiful without being skinny and petite.”

“What a powerful statement. You are clearly a model for your work and have already stolen the hearts of many. You worked with some very powerful idols for your ad and I have a letter from one of the Idols you worked with, ‘Y/n-ah, Your beauty comes not only from your smile but from your heart as well. I cannot wait for the world to see the diamond that you truly are. I enjoyed working with you and cannot wait to see where you go. Always your supporter, Min Yoongi.’”

A blush creeps up your neck. “Oh my! Mr. Min was a pleasure to work with. Actually, all of the idols who worked on the campaign were professional and seemed to support my ideals.”

“Did you have a favorite idol?”

“Lee Know was the easiest to work with, which I thought was odd. As a card-carrying Stay, he really was down to earth, and once he warmed up, it was nice to see that he wasn’t always the stone-cold Lee Know persona that he is known for.”

“Oh you are a Stay? Did you know that Felix will be joining us?”

“Yes, I did, actually. We met by accident. I was coming and he was going.”

“The show will consist of three teams of two and compete in a series of games. One up and comer matched with one Idol for each team. Wonder if you will be teamed up with one of your Favorite Group Idols.”

“As much as I love Felix-ssi, I don’t know if we would make a good team.”

~One-on-one Interview with Felix~

“She said what? And admitted she is a Stay! Awh… Y/n you break my heart. I guess being an Idol doesn’t save you from that.”

“If you are not on her team, maybe you can use her Stay heart to fluster her into making mistakes.”

“Yeah, no. Lee Know said she gets very focused and didn’t even flutter when she met him. I mean the short meeting we had in the hall, all she did was say hello, introduce herself, and wish me luck in the show. I didn’t even realize she was a Stay.”

“It seems like Y/n is going to be a wild card.”

~One-on-one Interview with San~

“I cannot wait to meet the rest of the contestants for the show.”

“So, San, you were a last moment addition. What made you decide to join on such short notice?”

“Oh, easy, Y/n-shi. I love her clothing line, and once Felix-ah told me she was on this, I knew I had to be here too.”

“Oooo, so have you had a chance to meet Y/n yet?”

“No, I haven’t met anyone else. But hey, I get to work with Felix-ah again after Kingdom and I get to meet Y/n-shi. I say that I am already going to have a good time!”

“I think it’s going to be an interesting show to say the least. We have Felix from Stray Kids, the soloist Eunbi, and San from Ateez for our Idols. For our up and comers we have my ZeroBaseOne bandmate Kim Gyuvin, Ko Chanbin from Namoo Actors, and Y/n CEO of The house of Y/l/n. The teams have been picked by our viewers, so it’s time for them to meet for the first time.”

~Yellow Team Interview~

“Felix-hyung and Chanbin-ah, you were the first team to be chosen by the fans with a whopping 10.8 billion votes. How does that make you feel?” asked MC Hanbin. 

“Shocking, really!” Felix says while blushing.

“I wasn’t sure I was going to be picked at all but I guess there are more BL fans out there than I thought. Thank you, everyone for your support,” Chanbin bows humbly to the camera.

“Between Stays and Yaoi fandoms, I am pretty sure we will become a strong team with their love and support guiding us, right Chanbin-ah?” 

“That’s right Felix-hyung. We will fight for you!”

~Red Team Interview~

“Waaahh, talk about having the advantage. Both of you debuted with K-pop groups because you were able to survive the shows which created them,” comments MC Hanbin.

“Hanbin-ah, you survived with me too! You tell me if this is an advantage or not,” Gyuvin laughs as he points out his leader is the MC.

“Oh that’s right, you both are part of ZeroBaseOne! You are really new to the music industry Gyuvin-ah. Don’t worry. We survived one show, we can survive another,” Eunbi encourages.

It was almost time to meet your Idol partner. So many of the staff seemed to be giddy about your meeting. You could hear their whispers and giggles, but there were a few sneers and looks of hate. Who were you paired with that would cause this kind of reaction?

“Hey, Y/n-shi, are you ready to go? Oh, is that another one of your pieces?” your assigned manager asks. Today, you decided to wear one of the more classic items in your collection. Your shirt is a crop top that feels like you are wearing a cloud on your sleeves. It’s paired with a black pencil-like skirt with a white scallop edge that starts at your ankle and curves around the front to connect to the opposite hip.

“Yes, it’s from the professional line set to come out in early fall. I thought it would be good for the first meeting. Do you think it’s too much?” you question now, wondering if you are toeing the line of the rules and regulations. 

“No, it’s gorgeous. You said it would be available in the fall. I am going to have to watch out for it. I think it would be lovely for my sister,” she praises.

“Oh, before the end of the filming, let me get your number, and I will send you one directly. Thank you for taking care of me!”

“Really? You are so caring, Y/n-shi. Thank you. Now, let’s go before we get behind.”

You walk onto the set and take your seat. Noticing you were the last one, you bow with apologies for your delay, and the interview starts.

Meanwhile, San was the first to arrive on set, his nerves going everywhere. He had learned from Felix that there was now a 50/50 chance that he would be teamed up with you. He wore a simple black suit jacket with black dress slacks and shoes. No one could ever go wrong with black, right?

Next came MC Hanbin, taking his seat with a smile and simple greeting, “Hello San-hyung. Did you know that Gyuvin-ah was on the show too? You met recently right?”

“Oh, he's here too? I didn’t know. Waaa, he would be fun to team up with, but hopefully, he could concentrate. He was so shocked that I was Soft Tofu,” chuckled San.

“He wouldn’t stop talking about it the whole next week. For the sake of my members, I hope you two are not teamed up because he will never stop!”

“Don’t you know who everyone is teamed up with?” San questions.

Hanbin only smiles and nods his head, then follows it with mimicking, zipping his mouth shut.

It takes a few minutes before a slight commotion comes from the side, indicating that the other teammate has arrived. Taking an anxious breath, San looks to see who is coming, only to lose it once you walk around the corner and sit next to him. 

“Y/n-shi, glad you made it safely. Any problems?” Hanbin asks, his eyes shifting between you and San. 

“Oh no problems. Just wanted to make sure my outfit was approved by PD-nim.”

“You're perfect,” San finally says, his eyes never leaving you.

~Purple Team Interview~

“I think Fate might be playing a hand in matching this team up,” MC Hanbin says, which only confuses you.

“Why do you say that? I am sorry but I really don’t know anyone here but Felix-ssi,” you ask.

“I think it's because of what I said in my one-on-one interview. I mentioned that I knew of your work and joined because of you and Felix-ah.” San says with a slight blush dusting his cheeks.

“Oh, well, you know who I am. Can I know who you are?” you ask, wide-eyed and slightly embarrassed to ask the “famous Idol.”

“Sorry! Of course,” San stands and bows. “I am Choi San, a main dancer of Ateez. It is my honor to meet you, Y/n-shi.”

“Oh, sit down, sit down. I am the new one here, and I should bow to you. I have heard of Ateez, but I am unfamiliar with your work. Sorry.”

“Did you know that Y/n-shi is a card-carrying Stay? She has even gotten to work with Lee Know and met Felix,  two out of eight members. Lucky girl. How does it feel not to be recognized, San-hyung?” MC Hanbin asks with a gleam in his eye.

Looking Hanbin dead in the eye, San says, “Y/n-shi may have met and worked with others before me, and that is fine. What matters now is that she is mine.” San glances at you, noticing your tentative smile; he adds, “Go, team!”

~YouPlusMe: Challenge 1 Hunter Hunter~

“Welcome back to YouPlusMe. Today, all the teams are meeting us here at Buggy World in Chuncheon, Gangwon, to play ‘Hunter, Hunter.’ Our teams will not only hunt down other teams and their additional markers but also protect their own.” MC Hanbin walks around showing groups of balloons tied to various trees and ends with the teams wearing protective gear and holding Nerf-like airguns. 

Team Purple is San and Y/n, Team Red is Eunbi and Gyunvin, and Team Yellow is Felix and Chanbin.

Both you and San are dressed in similar outfits. He looks like G.I. Joe but in dark purple. You discovered the team colors before you left yesterday and made one of your workout creations meet the requirements. You are wearing black leggings with a few neon purple mesh cut-outs and pockets. Your top, however, was a mix of dark, light, neon, and sparkling purple straps built over a black sports bra and connected with the leggings.

The other teams were also dressed to represent their team colors. You noticed yours was the brightest, but you hadn’t realized that this was a paintball mission or that you would also be a target. Your manager had tried to talk you out of wearing it, but you made it clear that your entire point of joining this show was to showcase your designs and their functionality for the plus-sized fans. 

“Are the teams ready?” Mc Hanbin asks, followed by hoots and hollers from the different teams. “Good. Now go to your home bases, and when the horn sounds, it's time to play– Hunter, Hunter.”

Making your way to Team Purple’s home base, you take the chance to look around and notice that you can see Team Yellow’s base from here. “Hey, San-ssi. Yellow is right on the other side of the tree line.”

“Good eye! I think Red is on the other side of them. I have been to this park before, and we are on the edge, which can give us an edge. Oh, good. Our base is going to be relatively hidden from anyone trying to come in from below or from the right. We literally can only be attacked from the top.”

“That’s great. Which means we can focus on offense. Get Yellow out of the picture, and then maybe wait for Red to come find us?” you ask San. You looked him up last night and noticed that he is somewhat athletic. He is definitely the muscle-bound one of his group and has done well on other variety shows before. 

Horn blares

“I am down for that. Let's go,” San's smile drops, and you notice it's game time. 

It isn’t long before you come up on your first set of balloons, but you pass them by in an attempt to scout the Yellow base before letting them know you are here. However, that doesn’t seem to be San’s plan, as he starts shooting immediately. You turn sharply uphill to find the higher ground and watch as he plows through the balloon groupings.

Movement to the side catches your attention as you see Chanbin trying to sneak up on San. Quickly, you move and take a single shot to his back, the lights of his vest going off, indicating to him that he has been hit. Before he can turn around to see who hit him, you have already dropped back and are taking out the balloons he failed to protect. 

Once the field is clear of balloons, you move to find San again to regroup, popping the remaining balloons along the way. It isn’t long before you find him and Felix battling it out, hiding behind bushes. This means the Red hasn’t made it here yet and is either on defense only or has gone after your base. This needs to end quickly. 

Considering the terrain and their position compared to yours, you don’t have many options without being seen immediately. You could take the chance and believe that San would find a way to win against Felix so that you could go back and ensure your base was secure, but you also didn’t want to leave him to fend for himself. You made the quick decision to just meet up with San. 

Right before you reach him, something to San’s left catches his attention, and you see Felix step out to take his shot. Without thinking, you leap forward, knocking San to the ground and shielding him. All while shooting at Felix, nailing him in the chest and leg. While Felix’s gear lights up, indicating that he is out, a voice rings through the area, “Team Yellow has been hunted. Team Purple and Team Red, the hunt is still on.”

Looking down, you see San looking at you wide-eyed and blushing. You smile brightly at him as you stand up, brushing yourself off, and say, “Sorry, but you were in my way. Now we have two choices: check Homebase or go after Red. Which do you want to do?”

Shaking his head, he also gets up off the ground. His mind was reeling, not from hitting his head or anything, just from you protecting him and laying on top of him. Trying to think of what to do, he can only say, “Offensive, right?”

“Sure thing. Let's go this way. You kept looking this way, so it might be something,” you say as you crouch down and start to walk… no prowl ahead. San happily follows behind you, watching your back in more ways than one.

Taking out the Red team was simple as they stayed by their base and didn’t hide themselves well. Everyone returned to the lobby after having a once-over by the team to make sure no one was injured and gave a few touch-ups for the cameras. Each team sat together on smaller couches, and MC Hanbin was in his own chair.

“Wow, talk about total domination. Team Purple, you took out both teams and didn’t lose a single balloon. The MVP certainly goes to none other than Y/n-ssi. You not only took out three competitors but over 60% of the balloons. How do you feel?” MC Hanbin asks. The rest clap and San pats you on the shoulder.

“I am honored, really. I think there is a stigma that shooting is a man’s game and that because I am plus-sized, I cannot be sneaky,” you respond, a little timid from all the clapping.

“I don’t know how she did it. She was like a ghost or invisible, and I mean, it’s not like she is hard to miss!” Chanbin says, still irritated to be the first one out in the game. 

At his comment, San looks at him with fire in his eyes. How dare he imply anything negative about you? Felix tugs on Changbin’s shirt and glances at the now-present demon-like San. Trying to backpedal, he says, “I mean, with how brightly she is dressed, I figured she would shine and glint in the sunlight. Come on, neon and sparkles?”

“I guess this just shows us that you cannot underestimate her or her abilities, does it?” San sneers. 

Laughing to ease the tension, MC Hanbin says, “Looks like the competition is on fire! Well, it’s time to rest up because tomorrow you will take on ‘Kitchen Crimes.’ Team Purple, you have an advantage.”

~YouPlusMe: Challenge 2 Kitchen Crimes~

“It’s Day 2! It's time for our next challenge, Kitchen Crimes, based on the American reality show Crime Scene Kitchen and hosted by Joel McHale. Our three teams will have two minutes to search a kitchen where something has been made. Once their investigation time is over, they will have one hour to recreate what they thought was made. Afterward, they will present their dishes to our guest chef,” MC Hanbin informs the audience and viewers.

“Team Purple, you won the advantage for this round. You get to steal thirty seconds from a team’s investigation time and add it to your own. Which team do you pick?” 

“Yellow,” San calls out. His eyes pinned Chanbin in his place. You glance up at San with shock because he didn’t even consult you. 

“Y/n-shi, are you in agreement with your partner?” asks MC Hanbin.

“Umm, yeah. He is the idol and has played these games before,” you smile gently, not wanting to cause a scene. “Sorry, team Yellow.”

“It’s okay, Y/n-shi. We know Sannie is just playing the game. No harm done, right Chanbin-ah?” Felix smiles, trying to play everything off as part of the game. He knows it isn’t, and he is pretty sure his partner knows he put a target on their back with his offhand comment. Felix just hopes that there are no other chances for San to strike out at him and his partner. 

“Eunbi-shi and Gyuvin-ah, how do you feel about the challenge?” asks MC Hanbin, smirking at his ZB1 bandmate.

“Hanbinnie, you know I don’t cook but the world knows that Felix-hyung can make killer brownies. So I am very happy that San-hyung took away some of their time and I just hope that it isn’t a desert dish we have to cook,” Gyuvin says with a whine. 

“I am with my partner on this one. I cannot cook to save my soul. Trust me when I was with IZ*ONE, the members were constantly saving me whenever we had to make something. We pretty much are gonna lose this one,” laughs Eunbi.

“Well, there you have it. Team Purple stole 30 seconds from Team Yellow, and they have 2 minutes and 30 seconds. Team Red follows with 2 minutes, and last is Team Yellow with 90 seconds,” recaps MC Hanbin.

It was show time again, and while you knew cooking was involved, you wanted to showcase your line still. You decided to wear something from your comfort line, trying to show that the plus-size woman can be fashionable but comfortable without looking like a lump on a log. 

The shirt was a tank top made from breathable neon purple material with a built-in bra that had almost as much support as yesterday's sports bra but a bit more silky feeling. The pants resembled parachute pants, with white and neon purple artistically placed spray paint marks. Topping it off was a black trainer and a high-waisted, jeogori-inspired jacket that matched the pants. 

San asked you what you would wear last night at the end of filming. Today, he arrived dressed to match your style, wearing black parachute pants, a deep purple tank top, and a leather jacket. He also wore black trainers but playfully had his hairdresser find a matching neon purple to add as a streak in his hair. 

As before, each team continued to wear matching-colored outfits. However, none seemed to stand out as you were with San. It made your heart soar with the hope that the viewers liked what they saw. But right now, it was not time to concentrate on that; it was time to investigate.

It seems like seconds have passed, not anywhere near your extended time. You and San figured it was a cake with strawberries and a whipped cream topping. 

“What do you think it is?” San asked.

“I have an idea. We both agreed there were strawberries, cream, and really fine flour in it. So maybe we just make a very fluffy cake with strawberry filling and a whipped cream topping?” you responded, chewing on your lip as you reviewed your notes.

“Ah, yeah. That sounds good,” San agreed, focusing on your now red, puffy lips instead of the paper you showed him.

“Do you know how to make any of it? San-ssi? San!” you attempted to get his attention. Once his eyes snapped to meet you, you asked again, “You zoned out on me. Do you know how to make any of it?”

“Only if it comes in a box and Wooyoungie is with me. Even then, we end up ordering from the bakery,” San says shyly. Not only is he embarrassed that you caught him staring, but you also just learn he can’t cook for the life of him. 

“Well, I have tried a few times with a recipe, and I know how boxcakes are made. My mom used to make them with me every weekend, but the filling… I haven’t a clue.”

“That is better than nothing. Let me help get the ingredients,” San says, heading to the pantry. “Wait, what am I grabbing?”

“As you all saw, the investigations went smoothly, and the cooking was a mess. Team Yellow sounded very certain that the dish was Strawberry Shortcake, Team Purple thought it was Strawberry Cake, and Team Red followed their gut with a Strawberry Crepes Cake.”

Now it is time to introduce our Guest Chef,” MC Hanbin looks to the side of the stage. “After 50 years of cooking experience, losing his sense of smell due, and appearing on ‘Chef & My Fridge,’ our guest judge is none other than Chef Yeon Bok Lee!”

“Hello, everyone. It is an honor to be here. I am Chef Yeon Bok Lee, and as a Chef, it is my job to protect the kitchen, but today, it's my job to judge your cooking,” the Chef says with a smile and bowing slightly. 

“Welcome, Chef! It’s our honor to have you. You were the one to make the secret item in the kitchen, right?” MC Hanbin prompts, to which the Chef nods.

“I wanted to make something that always brought a smile to the faces of my guests. It is simple in nature, sweet but not too sweet, and a perfect dish to top off a summer picnic.” The Chef gestures to the table before him, where the lights all focus as a covered dish rises, “Today I made strawberry shortcake for you!”

Mixtures of yeses, noes, and other exclamations at things not being fair come from the competitors. “Oh my, that was a mix of reactions,” Chef muses.

“It sure was, first up we will have Team Red. Please come and present your dish to the Chef,” requests MC Hanbin.

Taking their dish up to the judging table, Eunbi and Gyuvin’s Strawberry Crepe Cake starts to look like the Leaning Tower of Pisa. Eunbi smiles gently, trying to use her cuteness as a distraction. She says, “Hello, Chef. It is an honor to be cooking for someone as esteemed as you are. We thought with the fine flour and the strawberries, you had created a Crepe cake with strawberry and whipped cream topping.”

“Thank you,” the Chef replies, laughing at the team's appearance. Both competitors are flour-covered, making them more Team White than Red. Your crepe cake has structural problems; half has now slid onto the floor. Shall we taste what we can before the rest follows?”

Gyuvin cuts slices of the remaining crepes and adds whatever strawberries and whipped cream he can find before serving a slice to the Chef and his bandmate MC. Giving them both a cringing smile, he says, “We used fine flour, eggs, cream, sugar, and yeah… it should be good. Umm… Enjoy.”

Both MC Hanbin and Chef cut pieces and inspect the creation before eating. Immediately, coughing and choking start. While the Chef spits out his piece, being a good bandmate, Hanbin swallows his and forces a smile, commenting, “Well, at least it isn’t crunchy or burnt this time.”

“Ah, Team Red, I think you may have mistaken salt for granulated sugar for the whipped cream and strawberry sauce. I will say that your crepes are well made, though, with a good consistency and not overly cooked,” the Chef says before he downs half a glass of water. 

“Sorry, Chef. We ran out of time to taste everything,” Eunbi says as she backs away, embarrassed. Gyuvin just avoids eye contact with either man, taking the disaster of a dish back to their kitchen.

“Next up we have Team Purple. Please bring your dish to the judging stand,” directs MC Hanbin.

You take the cake and walk carefully to the stand, hoping to keep it from dropping it like the other team. Meanwhile, San hovers around you, whispering when it's time to step and encouraging you with small praises of how well you are doing by walking gracefully. You are trying not to turn beet red the whole time because praises have always done something to you, and it's not what you want the world to see. 

After successfully placing the dish down, San and you bow to the Chef. With a large but sweet smile, you say, “Chef Yeon Bok Lee, it is a pleasure to see you again.”

“You know each other?” San askes, ignoring the side eye from MC Hanbin.

“Miss Y/n, it is you. It has been some time now, hasn’t it? How is your family? Does your father still run the little noodle stand back home?” inquires the Chef with a genuine smile. 

“Yes, Chef. It has been a long time and my dad still runs the stand but now he has my brother joining him. Logan-ah is already 13 now and has shown great interest in cooking and baking,” you reply.

“Cooking and baking, you say? I may have to visit your father and brother to see this myself. Maybe he could come and take lessons from me one day. But now, let's see if you have a talent for baking. Eh?” The chef smiles, looking at the well-presented cake.

“Well, Chef, we have presented you with a Vanilla sponge cake with macerated strawberry filling and a whipped cream frosting topped with candied whole strawberries,” San proudly announces.

After inspecting the cake, MC Hanbin says, “Well, it survived the trip here. Please serve us a bite to try out and see if it tastes as good as it looks, hyung.” This is followed by San cutting each piece and serving it to them, including a candied strawberry. 

Following the same procedure of cutting, inspecting, and eating as before, you and San hold your breath. Your hand grips San’s wrist as you await their reaction. San, however, has been watching you since you touched him. He brings his other hand, gently rubs your upper arm, and whispers, “It’s okay. We got this. You did amazing.”

You smile at his words, remembering having saved the poor idol from burning off his fingerprints when he tried to dip the strawberries in the hot sugar to coat them without using the dipping fork.

“Waaaahhh! Such a light a fluffy sponge on the cake. I really wish you had made a shortcake and not a victoria’s sponge cake. A minor change to your egg, sugar, and water ratio and you would have made a delightful version of my strawberry shortcake,” the Chef comments with a slight frown.

“Those strawberries done in two ways is amazing given the limited time you had. I suppose as a CEO and fashion designer, you understand time management well,” compliments MC Hanbin.

“Well, that is true, but I also have someone who was a good boy at following directions in the kitchen,” you say, smiling at San, who only dusts his cheeks a deep rose and stutters his breath. 

Stepping forward, you take your cake and retreat to your kitchen, with San in two, still reeling from you calling him a good boy. Looking at the closest camera, San says, “See, Captain and Seonghwa-hyung, I can be good! Y/n-shi said so!”

“Last up, will Team Yellow present their dish to the Chef and me?” asks MC Hanbin.

Team Yellow shines like the sun because they know they got the right cake. Not only that, but they were the only ones, which means they automatically won. Placing down the cake on the stand, both smiling so widely that their eyes turned into crescents. 

Felix wastes no time introducing himself: “Hello, Chef Yeon Bok Lee. Most know me as Felix, but my name is Lee Yong Bok. It is an honor to have you taste something I have baked with the help of my competition partner, Chanbin-ah.”

“Oh my! We have a significant similarity there, I see,” smiles the Chef.

MC Hanbin laughs, “Not only does he share your name, in a sense, but Felix-hyung is also known worldwide for his brownie recipe. Isn’t that right, hyung?”

“Yes, my mates love it when I make them. Though our trainers don’t like it so much,” Felix giggles.

“Well, I should love to try them another day then, Yongbok-ah. Make sure to reach out when this is all over, ya?” asks the Chef.

“I would be… Yes, Of course. It would be a great honor!” Felix replies, bouncing on his toes with happiness. 

“First, he should try out the cake, hyung,” Chanbin interrupts. We present you with a take on strawberry shortcake. It is made with classic shortcake soaked in a simple syrup made with strawberry juice and topped with fresh strawberries, mint leaves, and whipped cream.”

“I can see that you have a keen eye, Team Yellow. You are the only ones to get it right, Congratulations. Now please cut us a slice, “ praises the Chef. 

After receiving the pieces, inspecting them, and tasting them, MC Hanbin speaks first, saying, “Wow! Your shortcake is so moist with strawberry flavor, and the whipped cream is the smoothest we have tasted. No wonder you are known for your bakes, Felix-hyung.”

“Hanbin-ah is right. You both did a great job with this bake. I can tell you must have sifted the flour and the sugar before incorporating them in, and the idea to make the simple syrup flavored adds a different dimension. Well done. It is clear that you are the winners of this challenge,” announces the Chef.

With bows of thanks and high-pitched squeals of joy, Team Yellow makes it back to their kitchen. 

“I want us all to thank Chef Yeon Bok Lee for joining us today. It was a delight to hear your thoughts on our competitors' dishes—some good and some bad. Team Yellow, with this win, you are tied with Team Purple for first place. Both teams have a chance to win the show by winning the challenge tomorrow, or Team Red, you have a chance to make it a three-way tie,” recaps MC Hanbin.

Looking at Team Yellow, he continues, “As winners of today’s challenge, Team Yellow, you won the advantages for tomorrow’s game, which is– Dance Battle. Each of our Idols will have 24 hours to learn the choreography of their assigned K-pop hit. They then have the next 72 hours to teach their competition partner.”

“In the First game, Y/n is a ninja. In the second game, Felix is a baking master. Now, in the final game, we got this Noona because we are both Idols and are used to learning dances quickly,” remarks Gyuvin to his competition partner. 

“I wouldn't be so sure, Gyuvin-ah. San is one of the main dancers for Ateez and is known for his determination and competitiveness. Not to forget, his dad is a Taekwondo instructor, so I am pretty sure that he has picked up some teaching skills from him,” Eunbi replies. 

~Dance Battle Song Selection~

“Hello, Team Yellow, and congratulations again on your win in Kitchen Crimes!” exclaims MC Hanbin. Both Team members bow in thanks and show their excitement to the cameras.

“It is time for your advantage! As you know, the next challenge is a Dance Battle and your win today allows you to pick the K-pop songs for all three teams,” he announces.

“No way! That is awesome!” Chanbin says, “We can pick an easy song for us and harder ones for the others. I have two left feet so, yeah. Felix-hyung, you know more about these dance challenges than I do, you pick please?”

“I know the perfect songs, easy peasy lemon squeezy,” Felix says with a smirk. 

“Oh, you already know what songs to pick, Felix-hyung?” asks MC Hanbin.

“Yeah, for Eunbi-shi and Gyuvin-ah… we don’t want to give them something easy because they are both idols. I have seen both of them dance, and they are good. So, we pick– Black Swan by BTS,” Felix declares.

“OH! Gyuvin is going to hate that,” laughs MC Hanbin. “It's a perfect choice for them. I can’t wait to see him try to lift Eubin-shi.”

“I think we can handle– My Angel by B.O.Y. It’s already choreographed for two males, and while it’s intricate, it’s not hard. What do you think?” Felix says, looking at Chanbin questioningly.

“Oh! I know that one. Yeah, I can manage that… I think,” agrees Chanbin.

“Chanbin-ssi, you may know your song now but you have to play fair and not start learning it until your dance practice with Felix-hyung, okay?” MC Hanbin warns the competitor, to which he nods in understanding.

“What song are you thinking about picking for San-hyung and Y/n-shi?” questions Chanbin. A smirk plays along Felix’s face while he rubs his hands together.

“Sannie and I have known each other for a while, and I remember he used to struggle with learning dances. For the competition, though, I want to challenge his ability to teach someone else not only to dance but to dance with intense emotion and strength. I want them to dance to– Red Lights by my hyungs, Bang Chan and Hyunjin.

~Dance Battle Idol Practice Day: Eubin~

“How do you practice Black Swang alone?” asked Eubin as she watched the modeled dance practice video. “See that! It’s a lift, and that is a spin. Do you have someone for me to practice with today?”

Eunbin says, looking at the camera, “Apparently, all of the Idols have to learn what they can alone today and then figure out the rest with our partners tomorrow. I just hope my partner is a lot stronger than he looks.

~Dance Battle Idol Practice Day: Felix~

“Well, now I kind of feel bad. I didn’t know that we would be alone for the first part of this dance practice. I thought we were going to be taught by someone. Not teach ourselves.” Felix laments. 

“Lucky for me and Sannie, our dances don’t have a lot of paired movement but more of mirrored or synchronized movements. Sorry, Noona Eubin! If it helps, I know that Gyuvin picked up Work by Ateez really quick according to the members. Soooorrrry!”

~Dance Battle Idol Practice Day: San~

“He did what?” San stands frozen when the producer tells him what song Felix picked for his team. “He does realize what this song is about, who dances it, and the… ahh… maturity level of this dance, right?”

Shaking his head, he watched the video again, “There are minimal lifts, but there are accessories, and touching, and like… Can Y/n-shi dance? Does anyone know if she will be alright with this?” 

He spends most of the first few hours just pacing and watching different videos of the song his “friend” picked for him to dance to with his current crush. While he doesn’t mind learning it or dancing it, especially with you, he wants to make sure you are comfortable with the sensuality and emotions of the dance. 

San’s head just spins, trying to figure out how to remain stage-appropriate while having to run his hands on your body, wrap you in chains, and press against you. His heart is aching as it comes up with a million reasons why you would be able to feel like that with him. 

~YouPlusMe: Challenge 3 Dance Battle~

“Welcome back to YouPlusMe,” smiles MC Hanbin. “While you saw our Idols' reactions to learning what song Team Yellow chose, you also saw that we gave them a dance room, a boombox, and a practice video.”

“We want to surprise you with the reactions and the dance practices with their competition partners. To watch the team practices and additional behind the scenes videos, please check out our YouTube channel. Don’t forget to like and subscribe!”

“What kind of competition can we have without a judge? Lucky for us, we have someone who started as a backup dancer Jason Wang. Now, he is known for his choreography skills and has worked with Enyphen, TXT, BTS, and Super M. Let me introduce none other than Mr. Nick Joseph!” introduces MC Hanbin.

“Hello, everyone,” Nick walks about with killer pop and lock moves. “It is a pleasure to be here. I have always been the one competing in these and never judging. I cannot wait to see what the Idols have been able to teach the newbies.”

“Now it’s the time we have all been waiting for. It’s time for… Dance Battles! Team Red is up first with their dance cover of BTS’ Black Swan,” introduces MC Hanbin.

They were dressed in solid black body suits covered with sheer drapes. Their faces were donning black and silver feathered masks. Eubin and Gyuvin lost themselves in the song. They moved around the stage, decorated to resemble a dead forest with fog machines and hanging twinkling lights. They gracefully engaged each other and made the lifts look effortless. It was like they controlled everyone who witnessed it with every beat they hit.

“That was breathtaking,” comments Nick.

“Gyuvin-ah! I never knew you had that kind of strength and elegance! I cannot wait for the rest to see this episode; you killed it. Eubin, how do you think your newcomer did?” asks MC Hanbin.

“He did really well. It took him a bit to trust himself with the lifts, but in the end, he gave 110% and never once made me concerned that he was going to drop me,” smiles Eubin and her partner, just blushing at the praise. 

“Thank you, noona, for being patient with me and trusting me to have the skills not to embarrass you. And Felix-hyung, thank you for the challenge, your song choice showed me that I am capable of more than I realize,” bows Gyuvin.

“Next up, we have Team Yellow. Nick-ssi, this team won the advantage in assigning the songs for the battle today. They chose My Angel by B of You. Let’s watch,” prompts MC Hanbin.

The multicolored spotlights have cleared the stage of everything, allowing the shiny black floor and dark-colored walls to showcase the two dancers taking the stage. Felix and Chanbin are dressed in black-on-black pinstripe suits, soft yellow shirts, and no tie.  

Once the dancing started, it was clear how well the suits fit but allowed for ease of movement. The crisp movements and synchronization between the two were clean and well-timed. 

The newcomer's solo piece only had a minor timing mishap, which was quickly corrected when the idol joined back in. 

“I loved the simplicity and the teamwork between the two of you,” compliments MC Hanbin.

“Mr. Ko, are you a dancer?” the guest judge asks. Chanbin simply shakes his head and then looks at Felix with a frown. Felix simply pats him on the back to comfort him in the moment. “Mr. Ko, I am impressed. I am assuming that the solo went a little off track because it didn’t move with the beat. Am I correct?

Both Team Yellow members nod as a staff member hands Felix a microphone: “Ah, yes. There was a sequence that got thrown off beat in the solo, but Chanbin-ah claims to have two left feet, which is why I chose this song for us.”

“Wow. Great choice of song, Mr. Lee. Mr. Ko, if this is your first time really dancing like this, and you are this good after only a couple of days. Bravo! You have great skills as a student, never lose that in life,” advises Nick.

“So far, Felix-hyung has picked songs that fit the teams well. During the selection process, he was trying to challenge his competitors and give his team the edge,” MC Hanbin tells the guest judge. 

“Ah, I think he missed his mark because Team Red killed it. His team struggled slightly, but we still have one more team left. What was Mr. Lee’s goal for the last team?” inquires Nick.

“He was hoping to challenge San-hyung with a song that would require him to teach not only dance but also the emotional side of dancing. Team Purple has Y/n-shi, a fashion designer.” MC Hanbin answers Nick.

“Oooo, yes, emotional understanding and ability to convey that is key for most duet performances,” comments the long-time choreographer. 

“It’s time! The stage has been set, and our team is in place. Here is Team Purple and their performance of Red Lights by Bang Chan and Hyunjin of Stray Kids,” announces MC Hanbin.

The only light on the stage comes from the back wall, which pulses red. The viewers can see an outline of you kneeling on a four-post bed. Your elegant but staccato movements sync with the deep breathing in the room as the song starts.

A chain in your hands goes across the stage, bringing the focus to San lying on the ground. As the words start, you pull him across the floor as you climb off the bed. 

Meeting in the middle, you pull him to his knees before you, and just as another breath is heard, the stage floods with lights, revealing your costumes.

San is wearing skin-tight black leather pants. His black shirt resembles a leather leotard with strategic cut-outs, long sleeves, and fingerless gloves. The tightness of his outfit shows off his muscular figure and leaves nothing to the imagination. Everything is lined with red ribbons and smaller red chains.

Your outfit is a short-sleeved curve-hugging leather body con dress and booty shorts that match San’s. It is also littered with cut-outs lined in red ribbons. Your forearms are decorated with the red chains you used to drag San across the floor. 

Both of your makeup designers went gothic, using thick black eyeliner, red eye shadow, and deep red lips. San’s skin was flawless and tan, while they used skin lightener on you, trying to bring a bit of a vampire vibe into the mix.

The two of you honor the mirrored dance of the Red Lights music video. Your fluidity and the power of the interactions between the pair of you has everyone shifting in their seats. 

As the song progresses, you both dance back to the bed. You shove San to lay on as you take the focus towards the end. Moving around the bed, you seduce the viewers. Using the chains wrapped around Sans pants as bindings, you connect them to the bottom posts. 

The chains from your arms unwind and connect to the cuffs of Sans's shirt. Using the chains, you guide San in his movements as the bed slides to the center of the stage and starts tilting toward the judges.

The song is close to the end when you latch the chains over to the bed's headboard and raise San’s arms over his head. Using the bed's angle, you slide off the bed. Soon, the bed is standing on end. 

Chains rattle as San struggles against the restraints, hindering his movements. His face is filled with desires and yearning for your touch.

With a deep roll to your hips, you walk up to San and run your nails along his body from his legs up to his abs. 

When the song ends, you lean in, ghosting a kiss over his lips, and then walk away into the night.

San’s deep panting was the only sound heard. 

The lights in the studio come back on. The other competitors and the judges are stunned at what they just witnessed. San has been released from his chains and joins you at the front of the stage. 

The attention without reactions has you nervously nibbling on your lower lip as you look up at San, who smirks down at you with his eyes still dark and dreamy looking. These last three days have been hell for you. 

The first time you heard the song, you were so excited because you loved it. I mean, how could you not be thrilled? Bang Chan was your bias. You already know the dance from the trillions of times you have watched music videos and YouTube dance practices. 

After showing off your moves to San, you blushed as he and the camera crew were floored. San couldn’t wait to make it fit the two of you. He quickly decided that you would be one of the two of you in charge. 

After some discussion with the production staff, the whole thing came together. The hardest part was making the bed work into the dance more than a stationary prop. 

San knew he didn’t want to end it with you and him suggestively on the bed because he wasn’t sure he could stop. When you came up with the idea of taking a more Dominatrix video for the dance and wanting just to leave San locked at your mercy, everyone laughed, but San thought it would be perfect. 

Not only did he want to see that side of you, but he also knew it would keep him in check. Then, he also asked if you could help figure out what the two of you would be wearing. Your creative juices were flowing. 

You were excited to design something for both you and San. You had never made men’s clothing, but it was a challenge you were willing to take on. Everything came together quickly with the help of the show’s wardrobe, production, and props team.

All these thoughts ran through your head as your focus remained on San alone. It wasn’t until the room exploded in applause that you finally relaxed into San and allowed all the jitters to disappear. Everyone is yelling out variations of acclimations. 

“Ok ok okay… Felix-ssi,” MC Hanbin looks at the idol. “I don’t think they struggled with anything with this song.”  Felix is just standing there trying to collect his jaw off the floor. His eyes stare into San’s skull with shock and many questions he cannot ask on air. 

“Miss Y/n, you killed it,” comments Nick. “Do you have any dance experience?”

While still trying to catch your breath, you answer, “Actually, I do.” pant pant pant “In high school, I was in a show choir, did some musicals, and I was part of a hip/hop and stomp club.”

“Period! That is why you know how to work the stage like it’s yours,” Nick exclaimed. 

“You should see you dance the original choreography to this song,” San beamed next to you. “I didn’t have to teach her a thing with that. Our time was spent making the dance more of a duet than a mirrored dance.”

“San-hyung,” MC Hanbin asked,  “how did you feel having Y/n-shi do the killing part in the dance?” 

“Easy.” San looks down at you while wrapping his arms around your shoulders in a back hug. “The moment she walked into the practice room and showed me what she could do, I knew I had to show off what an amazing and sexy partner I had.”

This caused the room to ooh and ahh, to which you tried your best not to blush. You just hoped the heat on your face was attributed to the dancing, not the comments or the feel of San behind you.

“Well, there you have it. Now, Nick-ssi, as our teams all gather on the stage, you have the wonderful job of selecting the winners of today’s Dance Battle challenge. Who is it going to be?” MC Hanbin looks at the guest judge.

“You know, as a dancer and choreographer, I can see so much talent between everyone on the stage. Each team found ways to work the songs chosen by Mr. Lee to their best abilities.”

Nick’s eyes dance over the teams, “Red Team, you swept us up with your grace. Yellow Team, you showed us what rhythm and teamwork mean.  Purple team, you took us on a ride that was powerful.”

“So which team is it?” prompts MC Hanbin. 

“I am going to have to go with… Team Purple!” 

This caused you and San to jump up and down, hugging and congratulating each other. The other teams came over to pat you on the back and personally remark on how great the dance was. 

“Nick-ssi, what was the reason why you finally chose the Purple team?” asked MC Hanbin.

“If I hadn’t known that Miss Y/n wasn’t a trained dancer, I would have thought that this was M Countdown's special appearance. The quality of dance, the passion between the two, and the costume design are top-notch,” explains Nick.

“Want to know something? Y/n-shi not only designed her costume but San’s as well in less than 72 hours,” informs MC Hanbin. “She really is a force to be reckoned with.”

Looking at the camera, MC Hanbin says, “Well this has been an amazing week of challenges for our Idols and our newbies. After three challenges, the clear winner of YouPlusMe is San-hyung and Y/n-shi!”

Cannons go off at the announcement of your team’s win. The stage gets covered in purple confetti as Red Lights starts playing again.

Everyone just grabs random partners and starts dancing. Felix is the one you end up dancing with as he pulls you farther and farther away from San. He wanted to dance some of the music video moves with you to send to his bandmates. 

You do not see San's look of longing and desire as he, too, gets swept away by the others.

After the song ends, you find yourself back in your personal dressing room. You would think you would be euphoric after winning the show, but your mind is focused on something else. 

You came here to show your work. Use it to your advantage and get your line out there. Challenge the Korean beauty standards and start a fire with the Fashion Industry as a whole. Apparently, the universe had more for you in mind, but you weren’t sure what to do about it. 

This last challenge is what broke down your walls. You weren’t expecting to feel something during all of this. You had thought it was just the rush of the competition, the thrill of showing the world who you were and working with someone who was just as excited to be here as you.

You weren’t blind. 

You noticed San from day one; who couldn’t? 

It was easy to dismiss because you wanted to focus on the show. After the first meeting and exchange of numbers, you soon learned that he had a charming personality.  

You found yourself looking forward to filming with him and smiling when he sent a text, but now that it’s over, you feel tight in your chest at the thought of never seeing him again.

It wasn’t until the second day of dance practice that you realized it wasn’t the show that you were excited about but San. Though you weren’t a morning person, it was early for anyone.

Opening the door to the practice room, you froze at the sight. The Idol ran on a different schedule than you, and it was clear he had been there long enough to build up a sweat. 

His face was half covered by a baseball cap pulled low. He wore baggy sweatpants that rode low on his hips, showing the band of his boxers, and no shirt. He was lost in his own world, dancing to It’s You by him and his bandmates Yeosang and Wooyoung. 

His body was moving like water. The body rolls, the hip thrusts, and the floorwork caused such a primal reaction from you that you had to leave. Your mind had gone into San becoming your partner in unprofessional ways.

A knock on the door brings you out of your thoughts. Walking to the door, you finish putting on your jacket and pull open the door. As if conjured by your thoughts, there stands San. 

“San,” you breathe, trying to keep your thoughts from seconds ago to yourself.

“Y/n,” smiles San. He seems fidgety tonight. 

“Thank you for everything.”

“Oh, it was nothing. I had a blast. This was my first challenge with someone who was really good at pretty much everything. It made me feel like I was the newbie of the two of us.”

“Oh, never. You are way too talented to be considered a newbie.”

The two of you stand there in the doorway of your dressing room. San is still fidgeting, and you don’t want him to leave yet.

“Are you going to the after party? I think Felix said something about it being at a Noraebang nearby. I think everyone else is going and may have invited others too.”

“I was thinking about it. I am pretty sure he invited my bandmates and his. It would be a perfect chance for you to meet the rest of your favorite K-pop band. Maybe get Chan-hyung and Hyujinnie to sing Red Lights for you?”

You giggle at the thought but hesitate, looking down and saying, “I would only want them to sing it if you were there to dance with me.”

A shy smile blooms on San’s face. Taking a chance that you might see the hidden question, he asks, “Do you want to keep dancing with me?” 

“I would love to keep dancing with you, Sannie.” You look up, smiling, hoping he means more than what he says. 

“Then, will you be my date to the after-party, and then maybe we can go to dinner some other time, just the two of us?” he asks again, stepping forward. 

Resting your hand on his chest, you lean into his warmth, “I would love to go out with you tonight or any night.”

With a smile on both your faces, San leans in and gives you a chaste kiss—just enough to settle your minds from the roller coaster of emotions you both experienced this week and light up your hearts with the excitement of a future together.

The last thought in your head is that agreeing to this show was more than you expected. You never expected to grow as much as you did, to win, or to find what may be love, but…

Was it Fate?

[tokyo-tower-symbolism]

What does Karen mean when she says "I am Reborn"?

Revue Starlight takes place in a time loop. 

For over 60 years, eight students from Seisho’s acting class continue to audition to be the lead in the Starlight Gatherer, each hoping to use the brilliance awarded to the top star to fulfill their wish to perform on the Stage of Fate. And in each of those loops, very little changes. The same leads are chosen, the same wish is made, and Aijou Karen is at the bottom of the rankings every time. 

Nothing changes until one loop where Kagura Hikari transfers to their school from London and replaces Karen as one of the eight participants in the audition, and suddenly everything is changing.

Hikari’s return lights a spark in Karen. The childhood promise they made to perform on stage together is the closest it’s ever been to happening, and Karen refuses to waste this chance.

In the first episode, we don’t get a very flattering picture of Karen. Her roommate struggles to wake her up to get to morning practice, Karen is stiff as a board while stretching, she’s not taken seriously by her classmates at all, and she can’t even picture herself ever beating Maya or Claudine for the lead roles in the play. Don’t get me wrong, her classmates all like her and honestly she’s really funny to watch, but everyone is here because they want to be the star, not to fool around.

It comes to a head when the giraffe who runs the underground auditions points it out. She’s not desperate like the other girls so she has no chance of winning. He says that there is no place for someone like Karen to have a chance at that dream stage. 

But Karen doesn’t care. She ignores the giraffe entirely and jumps on stage to join Hikari. And as she falls, she undergoes a transformation, going from her school uniform to the revue outfit.

There’s a lot to be said about the transformation sequence, like how quick and mechanical and impersonal everything is. Machines sew the costumes and get everything ready and makeup is briefly applied. It’s all the work that would usually be given to the school’s Class B, which works on all the backstage stuff, like the props and the sets and the costumes. They’re out of focus a lot of the time and we only really focus on two characters from Class B, but they still exist! They’re friends with the main class A actors and in the movie it’s because of a speech the director of the play gives that the main characters decide to stand up on stage again. But they don’t matter to the audition. It only cares about the top star.

There’s also how the uniforms are mass manufactured and the very important star buttons, which signify victory or defeat so basically life or death, are unceremoniously tossed in a box, showing how disposable the rest of the stage girls are in creating the top star. Honestly the whole thing is kind of sinister in hindsight once you understand the true nature of the auditions.

But the part that’s all Karen is when she jumps and in the background it says: I am reborn.

Because Karen completely reinvents herself. She goes from getting sweeped in a low dip by Junna in their daily life to doing the same to her in the revue. In the following episodes, she starts waking up early, taking practice seriously, she changes her classmates' worldviews after defeating them, and she even beats Claudine and Maya to earn a lead role in the Starlight Gatherer. Nana specifically says that all the changes in this loop stemmed from Karen, despite Hikari’s appearance being the first major difference.

And in the climactic final revue of the show, Karen is only able to reach Hikari by stating that she will constantly be reborn if it means she can stand on stage with her. That Karen doesn’t mind getting her brilliance stolen or being trapped in the stage of fate or whatever terrible fate might befall her if she sticks with Hikari since each time she will get back on stage, born anew.

But what exactly does it mean to be reborn as a stage girl?

Well first, in order to be reborn you need to die, so let’s start there. And in the show, we see two dead stage girls.

The first is Hikari after she lost the audition in London and had her brilliance stolen. As a result, she loses all interest in the stage and can hardly remember why she bothered trying so hard to become the lead in her school’s play. But what snaps her out of this is remembering her promise to stand on stage with Karen, and how disgusted she is in herself that she almost forgot it. In a desperate attempt to reclaim what she lost, she goes to participate in the Tokyo audition since the winner will steal the brilliance of all the participants to make the stage of fate and become the untouchable top star. Unfortunately the one flaw in her plan is that Karen is also in the audition, so even if Hikari did win, she would also be stealing Karen’s brilliance, making it so their promise could never be kept regardless.

Hikari continues to be dead as a stage girl despite being a participant in the Tokyo Auditions. Although her technical skills are perfect, Maya in the first episode mentions that her heart’s not in it, which we later find out is because Hikari had lost her brilliance. This can be seen in her revue outfit in London compared to now. Over there, she had a sword and a red cape just like everyone else. But now her blade is shortened to a dagger’s length and her cloak is blue, the color of her promise which is her true desire here instead of the red of the top star that everyone else desires.

But Hikari is eventually reborn. By the time of her revue with Nana, Hikari has changed. She’s no longer pushing everyone away and has actually started to make friends with everyone and told Karen how dear their promise is to her as well. Even though Hikari only came here as a step on her path to become a top star and one day fulfill her promise with Karen, she’s instead inspired by Karen that the two of them could shine as top stars together here. Her entire worldview is completely changed, and in this Revue against someone who is in the audition not for a love of acting, but to instead use it as a stepping stone for her own ambitions, just like Hikari, her brilliance is reborn. Hikari’s weapon transforms, not back into the sword from before, but into a new dagger with a string that Hikari can use to maneuver herself and a star shaped hilt, similar to her hairpin, a symbol of her promise with Karen.

She’s not the same as she was before she died as a stage girl, but she’s reborn as someone new with a brand new outlook on life.

And the next dead stage girl we see in the show is Karen herself.

After Hikari wins the audition, she refuses to use the brilliance of the other participants to create the stage of fate, and instead offers to create it herself. This doesn’t really work and Hikari is trapped there for months in a Sisyphean effort where she attempts to build the Starlight Tower but it is destroyed over and over again because it’s impossible to put on a play alone.

But outside the Stage of Fate, no one knows what happened to her. Life goes on, but Karen is constantly searching for Hikari but has no luck. In the meantime Karen has lost the motivation she had back when Hikari transferred in. Even though she can say her lines perfectly during practice, there is something missing that everyone can tell. Her heart’s just not in it anymore. Karen even wonders why she’s been trying so hard all this time. It’s the spitting image of Hikari in London after she lost her brilliance. Even though no one stole it from her this time, without Hikari out there, Karen has no motivation to stand on stage.

But with no clues left to find where Hikari has gone, Karen instead has to understand Hikari. She reads Hikari’s Starlight Gatherer book in the original English like Hikari did. It’s hard and she needs a dictionary to translate it, but she puts in the effort to understand Hikari and why she left.

And on her way to confront Hikari once more with this new understanding, she is guided by her classmates. In the background the song “Knowledge of a Stage Girl” is played as each of them tells Karen what being on stage means to them.

Karen is reborn and ready to face Hikari after being dead as a stage girl, and it’s only because her worldview changed after understanding everyone else. Karen at the end of episode 10 couldn’t have convinced Hikari, she was absolutely blindsided then and had no idea what Hikari was doing. But now Karen was ready after having understood a variety of perspectives.

Because that’s what being reborn is, to change yourself. You will never be anyone other than yourself. But every time you understand someone, learn from someone, or get inspired by someone, you are reborn. You suddenly see a path someone else took that you hadn’t thought of before. You’re suddenly given a whole new way of life to live. You can be reborn as someone brand new. And even if you choose to stay exactly the same, you’ve still grown since you now know they exist.

When the stage is reborn in the final revue of the show, it’s only because Karen offered a new ending: that after falling, Flora ascended up the tower once more to meet the trapped Claire. Karen couldn’t change the past, she can’t make it so Flora and Claire never ascended the tower in the first place, she can’t make it so the two of them never took part in these auditions, but she can change what's gonna happen next.

This is also seen in the movie. Throughout the movie, Karen is wandering along a train track and reminiscing on how she became a stage girl. We see Hikari and Karen’s first meeting and the first play they saw with each other. We see how Karen had been the lead in her middle school plays and took dancing and singing lessons ever since elementary school. We see how she had to give up video games and hanging out with her friends so she could get into one of the best acting schools in the world. We see how scared she was that Hikari might have forgotten their promise. 

And once Karen arrived at the end of the tracks, she decides to give up on the stage, having realized that she had fulfilled her dream to shine as the lead with Hikari and now there is nothing left for her future on the stage. So Karen dies as a stage girl, for real this time. It’s still a metaphor but it’s real, her body goes limp in front of Hikari and there is tomato juice everywhere.

It’s real bad. Hikari starts crying and cradling Karen in her arms, which is a big departure from how stoic she usually is. But Hikari is finally truthful about why she left, having been symbolically reborn herself, and she tells Karen her true feelings, that she wants Karen to come back to the stage where she is waiting.

Karen falls again, and just like the first time she transformed, it even has the sign behind her that says I am reborn.

Her body rides down the tracks on a train, reliving the memories and burning up everything she already gave up before. But this time when she returns to the end, she is alive and reborn. The circumstances are all the same as before, she still fulfilled her dream and has nothing left. As she later says, she’s the emptiest she’s ever been. But she’s here now, all because Hikari said she was waiting for her, and that’s enough of a reason to stand on stage.

This is just like the first episode, where the only difference from all the other loops was that Hikari was there, and that’s all Karen needed to change and be reborn.

Because Karen can’t redo her whole life. Even within the time loop everything happened more or less the same each time. Karen already gave everything she had into acting and fulfilling her promise. Like the song playing in the background says, “I would be reborn as myself.” 

It’s not like she ever acted differently to try and become the top star, she doesn’t imitate Maya or Claudine or any other top star. She is unabashedly herself, always kind and energetic. The only difference is that she’s just more focused and motivated and understanding with each rebirth because the only thing she can change is what she is going to do right now, and that’s what it means to be reborn. 

Karen is transformed over the course of the revue, her sword snaps and her future is changed. She gains a better understanding of herself and why she stands on stage. And instead of desiring to stand beside Hikari on stage again, or longing for the stage that had already passed, she finds a new ambition, and chooses to stand against her as rivals who won’t lose to each other. And as established in a previous revue (that Karen wasn’t there for), the revue of rivals never ends, no matter how far apart their stages are. So instead of giving up on the stage like she said prior, we see the reborn Karen auditioning for a brand new role during the credits.

Revue Starlight is all about these little transformations. As the stage girls take part in each of the revues, they learn a little bit more about each other, which helps them learn more about themselves. They grow and change because they clash with each other, and become stronger for it. The giraffe changes from the proctor to becoming a bunch of fruits and vegetables, symbolically the fuel they need to ascend to the next stage instead of using each other’s brilliance. The revues themselves change from being part of an audition to being entirely for the girl’s satisfaction, with previous win conditions such as cutting the brooch or claiming position zero becoming worthless as they move on to bigger things.

And all of this was a choice. The first choice was that Hikari didn’t want to give up on her dream with Karen, so she got back on stage. The next choice was that Karen wanted to stand on stage with Hikari, even if she wasn’t part of the auditions. In the movie, everyone else gets the chance to see themselves as a dead stage girl. At first they are in shock, but then they hear a speech from the director about how they are all scared together. And after that, each of them chooses to get back on stage despite the risk, because they aren’t facing it alone.

In the final revue of the show, Karen said that every time she gets on stage, she is reborn. And we saw that! Before every revue, Karen had her “I am Reborn” transformation sequence. And it’s not just her, in the recap movie, the other stage girls didn’t get the full transformation sequence, but they did get an “I am Reborn” card before their revues. Because everytime a stage girl chooses to stand on stage, someone else is there. Someone else is going to be facing them in the revue. Someone else will be acting across from them, or will be supporting them off the stage. And even when they are apart, they are going to be thinking of each other.

Even from the very beginning, the reason that any of them chose to stand on stage was because of someone else. Maybe they were inspired like Karen, Hikari, or Junna. Maybe it was expected of them like Maya, Kaoruko, or Mahiru. Or maybe it was because someone else was already there, like with Futaba, Claudine, or Nana. And sometimes it’s a mix because people are complex and have so many different reasons for doing anything they do. 

But still, they chose to do it, to change and to take a risk and put it all out there and accept whatever comes with it.

And that is what it means to be reborn.

[gingermintpepper]

Day 1: Apollo

Interpretation notes and trivia under the cut!

His interpretation for my work is based very much around the concept of his manifestation as the Radiant God of the String. Because of this, quite like Hecate, he’s triple-fold and occupies three major spaces; the string of Fate and therefore prophecy, the bowstring and therefore distance and destruction and the lyrestring and therefore music and order. He’s a somewhat melancholy figure all things considered - Fate and following Fate’s tennants is something that he struggled a lot with as a child and even now as a more mature deity, the only solution he’s truly found is to take things one day at a time. Very diligent and fastidious, he’s a hard worker and tends to put his everything into completing any task set before him which also tends to work to his disadvantage since he’s prone to becoming tunnel-visioned until he’s finished what he said he would finish. His family orchestrated his winter breaks because he had the nasty habit of working himself sick when he was still very young.

Apollo is generally represented by circles in my work - priests of Apollo will be marked with at least three circles on their face and usually wear triangular jewellry (typically earrings or necklace charms) to reflect the triple-nature of their god. His favoured colour is a rich, deep blue and while he typically wears elaborate eye paint, he rarely uses face powders. Wears gem-toned blues for his lips unless in mourning where he will leave himself unadorned and unpainted out of respect.

Some quick trivia: 

Was born identical to Artemis even though they were born (years) apart. Had brown hair, wolf’s ears and fangs and horns when he was a child but never manifested those features again after his penance for slaying Python. If he’s very stressed or angry, sometimes his fangs will show. The brown of his hair grew out to blond naturally as he developed and matured as a god.

Proficient in all instruments but has always especially preferred stringed instruments. Truly unmatched with a kithara but only uses it for special occasions and official meetings. Generally prefers his lyre for every day usage

Really good at sewing and braiding strings together due to the exercises he had to do while under the tutelage of the Moirai sisters. Can’t weave since Athena banned him from touching a loom but he does like watching her spin. The one time she caught him trying to replicate her patterns with a needle and thread, she complained to Zeus that he had broken his oath. He teases her about that even now.

Was the last of the Twelve to learn how to read and write because he hates letter systems and finds it too arbitrary. Prior to the collaboration that resulted in written letter systems, everyone was perfectly fine with remembering the important stuff and encoding the rest in artistic format such as tapestries, pottery, furniture and jewellry. Apollo himself has a truly formidable memory since he’s been composing and immortalising the events and histories of the world in song since he was very young. He finds written books very dull but Clio’s very insistent about written histories being important and convenient so reluctantly, he’s given permission for his songs and poems to be -gags- transcribed and written down.

Is only called Apollo by his parents, Artemis and Dionysus. Hermes rarely calls him by name in general and the others, including other siblings like Ares and Athena, have always called him Phoebus. Interestingly, Zeus usually calls him Phoebus but will call him Apollo when they are alone or when he’s being especially serious. Apollo is completely comfortable with either name but he does see Phoebus as a bit more formal than Apollo. (Despite his best efforts, both Calliope and Clio also still stubbornly call him Phoebus though he’s fairly sure it’s mostly because they know it bothers him.)

[fancyfeathers]

I love your blog! Your darlings are so well written, you want to be mad at them for accepting their fates but their backstories are so complex that you actually cant get mad?!

And Eloise is my favorite of the kids.

In one of your posts you compared the noble boy she meets to a Young Vincent Phantomhive… but how messed up would it be for the Moriarty plan if she met O!Ciel Phantomhive and Sebastian instead… Eloise is very smart - O!Ciel is too, as well as very determined and a manipulative little shit (which we love).

Good luck Moriarthree dealing with this Queen’s Watchdog and his pet demon.

I know black butler is not in your possible requests but I found the idea pretty entertaining.

Keep up the gréât writing!

*Turns to Kitty*

“Wanna help?”

“Oh yes I do.”

Co-writers on this one baby!

Father Like Daughter (Yandere William James Moriarty and his darling having a genius daughter)

While this would definitely be an AU but it is definitely fun together, if they ever met it would be during the public school arc and I imagine even through it is a boy’s school that all the children in the Moriarty family would be sent due to them needing to be away and safe during a particularly dangerous mission that could take awhile, the girls’ enrollment is managed through Albert and William pulling a few strings with a few friends who work there, along with Eloise’s high IQ, Hyacinth’s high literacy level, and Madeline’s and Marguerite’s high physical performances.

Andrei would be placed in Red House at age seventeen, Hyacinth in Purple House at age fourteen, Marguerite and Madeline in Green House at ages fourteen, and Eloise in Blue House at age sixteen which would place her in along with Ciel.

Due to the the special circumstances I believe one of the members of the crime gang would be keeping an eye on the children, James Bonde and or Miss Moneypenny. Of course Eloise’s circumstances would draw attention especially because she is a lady, but not just a lady but a lady with an insanely high IQ, and any stupid welcome house traditions will be stopped immediately by James Bonde who is posing as the caretaker of the Moriarty children due to their special circumstances which is another curious thing about this family.

Both Sebastian and Ciel notice her lack of effort in her classes and personal studies but still having extremely high marks even in the most difficult of studies. When Sebastian checks up on her as housemaster during quiet time she is reading her own personal fiction literature, and Mr. Bonde has to explain to him that little Eloise had always excelled since she was a little girl, studying Shakespeare and advanced sciences when she was barely five years old, and her cousins and sister were just as talented but in different ways, her sister Madeline of Green House being a top tier fencer and mathematician, her cousin Marguerite of Green House being a skilled markswoman and equestrian, her cousin Hyacinth of Purple House being a talent in the theater along with having a deft hand in sewing and art, and then her eldest cousin Andrei of Red House being the heir to the title of Earl of the Moriarty family and being skilled in the psychological sciences.

When Ciel is late to tea, he spotted Eloise and and Andrei in the gazebo as well which quickly shows the quick favor the Moriarties had won from the prefects. That evening when Ciel is complaining to Sebastian, Eloise comes knocking with her little charming smile but when the door closes her little act fades away.

“You have no actual intentions as a student here do you? You are up to something and that is painfully obvious.”

“How did you-“

“Know? You have no idea what my family life is like, you learn a thing or two in the Moriarty Estate. I have a proposal for you, I can help you if you help me eventually, and need I remind you I have a relative in each of the houses. So do we have a deal?”

“…I-“

“I will let you sleep on it, it is the only fair since I am your senior. You can let me or Mr. Bonde know, or perhaps Miss Moneypenny… but she is looking after Hyacinth in Purple House.”

So the next day when Ciel goes to speak to her, he catches her at a time where Mr. Bonde is at her side, but speaking to her in a tone in much more of a scolding than his usual tone to her, showing that he is no servant of the Moriarty family that he was led to believe, much on how Sebastian is not an actual housemaster.

“Eloise, you cannot have others dragged into the affairs of your family, your father and uncle sent you lot here to keep you safe.”

“I am sorry alright, but something is not right about any of this, that Ciel boy is not hear for school, something is clearly wrong-“

“Stay out of it, or else I will alert your father, do I make myself clear?”

“…Very.”

When Bonde steps out, giving Ciel a smile as he walks off to check up on the other Moriarty children in the other houses. Ciel steps into her room and sees her in pure anger.

“Who is your father exactly-“

“And who is your butler? It seems we find ourselves in a stalemate of secrets.”

After the incident with Cole, I think Andrei would be the one to take his place due to his high level of manners and being the heir to the Moriarty name. Putting more Moriarties in Ciel’s radar, and honestly why he does not really need help from Eloise anymore, he is now curious about what she wants and who exactly her family is. So when speaking to Andrei one day and bringing the topic of Eloise.

“Number one, my cousin is far too old for you to court if that is what you are after, but then again she is already being courted by that gentleman at the university. Number two, if you are trying to find out about our family, we would be fools to tell the Queen’s guard dog, now wouldn’t we? Leave family affairs to the ones who bear the Moriarty name.”

Then he tries his luck with trying to talk to shy, little Hyacinth, but she just hides behind the other students or Purple House.

Then with Madeline and Marguerite in Green House but the two of them refuse to give him any of the answers he seeks.

Their family is so secretive is as if they were related to the Lord of Crime himself

(Both Kitty and I doubt Eloise and Ciel would be friends, rivals at best, enemies at worst since their personalities would clash rather easily)

(Kitty honestly had the idea of Ciel meeting Eloise’s lover and immediately remembering his father and also the idea that her lover could be the reincarnation of his father but that really wouldn’t work because of their ages)

(Also just imagine when the Moriarty kids are all at the gazebo and their father’s pay them a visit and the bunch all just are surprised and slightly yet clearly worried and distressed at the sudden visit, Eloise especially)

[welcomingdisaster]

Ok so I’m rotating ideas about elves and mythology and decided to drop some ramblings in your ask box because of all the wonderful theatre-related thoughts you’ve been sharing!! The thing is that the silm is a mythology right. Like it’s written in that style, and the heroes of LoTR and the later Ages in general are always explicitly looking back to the stories of the First Age (see: Aragorn wanting to cosplay Beren and Lúthien with Arwen). But what were the myths, the cultural stories, of the Elves of the First Age? In Tirion what were the stories that Maglor might write a play retelling or subverting, that Elemmírë might make a new song about, that Míriel might have woven into a tapestry? All cultures have ancient myths – but these characters are a) living at the very dawn of the world, and b) are all going to become mythological figures themselves! It makes me a bit insane. My thoughts are that they told a lot of stories about the war the Valar made on Melkor, and also about Cuivienen and the awakening of the elves, but honestly I don’t KNOW. What do you think? (No pressure to answer this is very random I realise) ❤️❤️

NO I love these thoughts!!! My thoughts generally go along the same vein as yours in terms of the general themes of elven myths. Here are some possibilities I imagine:

Whichever continent the elves in question are not seeing is often the center of the stories. The Sindar and Avari in middle-earth myth-make a lot about the lands in the west; the Eldar in Valinor myth-make about middle-earth. Since we're talking about Elemmírë, Míriel, and Maglor I'll stick to the latter.

I imagine there's aways the pervasive idea of secret Ainur no one has discovered yet. No matter how many times the Valar go "no we promise we're all here in Valinor, there's no other Valar left" there's 100% an elf somewhere going "have you heard about the Vala of bogs? yeah they live in middle earth and they're in charge of all the bogs there and if you aren't careful you'll be stuck serving in their bog court"

Not to mention elves who know Aulë and have heard that his people sleep under the earth, waiting for their time to awake. I'm sure for some elves tell it as simply that, but over time another pervasive myth develops -- stories of great dwarven kingdoms under the earth, kingdoms they're barred from seeing, stories of seven great dwarven kings, each much like Aule in face, each possessing a specific sort of magic.

Imin, Tata, Enel, etc! Not only do we canonically get them as a counting story, I imagine their fates are also something that ends up being talked about? They do not seem like they ever ended up in Valinor -- what happened to them? I feel like elven stories can tend to go along the lines of "and then he turned into a tree" or "he still dwells by the sea where he was born" or "he fell into the cracks of the mountains during the war and became one with the earth."

Myth as a way to explore cultural taboos! Elves coming to Valinor, a land with no pain or crime, with the shadows of war and suffering behind them -- I imagine they must explore taboo and pain through storytelling. What happens to an elf that leaves his wife for another? What happens to an elf who poisons her sister? I imagine there's some gruesome/creepy stories that come out there, but are told with a naïveté to the actual truth of what violence looks like. Something along the lines of "and then the servants of Melkor hacked the elven king into bits, so his wife had to go looking for each piece of him in every corner of the world and sew them back together"

The sea!! Must I say more. The elves emerged from the sea, and they long for it -- yet they cannot go too far into the waves without drowning, and they do not know what lurks under the waves. I imagine myths centering around sea-creatures, around the souls of the drowned, around elves (mer-elves?) who never left the sea and make their kingdoms underneath the waters, etc.

Just some ideas!! If anyone else wants to contribute headcanons for early elf myths to his post, please do!

[cosmerelists]

If Cosmere characters had mundane hobbies...

And by “mundane” I just mean “non-extreme” (aka, no base jumping, no paragliding); we’re talking, like, doing puzzles or going for a pleasant hike. If all these hobbies existed and Cosmere characters weren’t busy fending for their lives all the time, what might they get up to?

1. Szeth: Frisbee golf

We already know that Szeth is great at paintball; I just feel like he’d be weirdly good at frisbee golf as well.

2. Renarin: Speed Rubik’s Cube

Renarin likes to fiddle and have something for his hands to do--I think solving a Rubik’s Cube would be fun for him. And I threw in “speed” (aka, trying to do it as fast as possible) because Renarin loves to jump into things wholeheartedly.

3. Kaladin: Indoor Rock Climbing

Kaladin has already gone rock climbing in two books--he makes his own rock wall in the chasms in Book 1 and climbs down Urithiru in Book 4. He even knows that he should be using “rock dust” for his hands. I think some nice, non-extreme, indoor rock climbing would be good for Kaladin. Bonus: he’s not afraid of heights!

4. Shai: Stamp Collecting

(I’m sorry)

5. Eshonai: Hiking

Eshonai loves to go out into the woods and explore, see new places and people and things. I can see her getting into hiking.

6. Raoden: Coding

Before he even had powers, Raoden already liked to memorize Aons--and from what I understand, AonDor is basically coding. 

7. Tien: Rock Collecting

I mean, this is literally just canon. I have to imagine that he’d also enjoy whittling since that is again, simply canon. 

8. Shallan: Crochet

Okay, so Shallan does already have hobbies in canon: like drawing, for example. But I think she’d also enjoy crochet--all those patterns coming together, her Spren humming excitedly...

9. Adolin: Sewing

Even while trapped in Shadesmar, Adolin is able to sew himself a new outfit. If he had time and materials, he could definitely make some cool clothing. 

10. Mare: Gardening

I mean, she loves flowers. If she were alive when her planet could support flowers, I think she’d love to grow some.

11. Sixth of the Dusk: Birdwatching

If he wasn’t, you know, desperately trying to survive at all times, I feel like Sixth of the Dusk might enjoy some nice, relaxed birdwatching. 

12. Wax: Puzzling

Normally Wax is putting together the pieces of deadly mysteries that will impact the fate of his planet. Maybe he’d find it a nice change of pace to just put together colorful cardboard instead!

13. Rysn: Extreme Couponing

Listen, Rysn once leapt off of a cliff to talk to a god to make a deal. Clipping coupons would at least have the advantage of being safer than that, no matter how “extreme” she gets.

14. Rlain: Amateur Radio

Amateur radio tends to use morse code, which is a form of communication Rlain might find comfortingly rhythmic. Plus, amateur radio lets you connect with people, but no one can see you or judge you for being a crab person. 

15. Vin: Parkour

Even without powers, I can see Vin running across buildings and climbing things she’s not supposed to climb. I think she’d have a good time.

16. Jasnah: Crossword puzzles

Yes, I am basically calling Jasnah a nerd here, but also, I think she’d probably really like crossword puzzles--knowing things, understanding obscure trivia, solving puzzles that aren’t about the end of the world...

17. Dalinar: Tunnelling

I dunno if this is just a Reddit phenomenon, but apparently some people just really like to dig long tunnels underground? And Dalinar sure had a great time digging out that latrine that one time. Perhaps that was a sign that his true love is burrowing deep, deep underground.

18. Taravangian: Fantasy Football

I don’t know a whole lot about Fantasy Football, but I believe it involves creating your own imaginary team of players and then using their actual, real-life performance to get points. So you have to be good at predicting how people will act, skilled at long-term planning, and have a deep desire to win. It’s like Taravangian’s diagram, only nobody (hopefully) dies!

[ladykailitha]

If I Rescue You, Will You Rescue Me, Too? Part 7

Hello, hello! The pieces are being slotted together and Eddie gets informed.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3  Part 4 Part 5  Part 6

*

Not only were Eddie’s friends instrumental in getting the things Steve needed for Eddie, they were also accommodating in helping Steve find something to wear so that he didn’t stick out like a sore thumb at the concert.

It was still in Steve’s style, but it wouldn’t look out of place. He ended up buying them lunch as a thank you.

As they were leaving after dropping Steve back off at the video store and his car, Jeff stopped him.

“We know about Eddie,” he said softly.

Steve tilted his head and frowned for a moment before he realized what the other boy was talking about. “Oh. Um, yeah.” He scratched his cheek. “I’ve recently discovered I’m bisexual, so yeah.”

Jeff nodded. “Noted. Just be careful. Indy is more tolerant in some places and less tolerant in others. Just...be careful okay?”

Steve nodded. “Believe me, I have no desire to turn a fun night into a hate crime because I can’t keep my hands to myself. Can’t make any guarantees Eddie will do the same, though.”

Jeff laughed. “Yeah, yeah. Take care, man.”

*

Steve went over to Dustin’s, vest in hand. He bashfully held it out to Claudia.

“Do you really think you can get the stains out?” he asked, ducking his head to hide his blush.

She took it gently from him. “Dustin said you were hurt really bad when you were wearing this?”

Steve gulped, but nodded. “Road rash combined with a vicious animal bite.”

“Let’s see what we can do, shall we?” She led the way to the laundry room, Dustin and Steve following behind like ducklings.

Claudia laid it gently on the top of the dryer and spread it out. She ran her fingers over the dirt and grime embedded into the denim and rubbed the fabric between her thumb and forefinger. “The dirt will be easy enough to get out,” she said, mostly to herself.

She opened the sides to reveal the underside of the vest. The shoulders of the back were stained as was the front left near the pocket. “This will take some work, but thankfully the front isn’t near the patches and the back is completely covered.” She picked up the vest and held up. “That way if we aren’t as successful at least as far the back is concerned it can still be worn, because no will see it. The front will be harder because we don’t have that luxury. But we’ll see.”

Steve and Dustin nodded.

“How long do you think it’ll take?” Steve asked.

“Oh several hours at least, dearie,” Claudia murmured. “If you have other things to do, I’d recommend you do them and come back tomorrow. I’ll have a better idea of how salvageable this is going to be.”

Steve sighed, half relief and half frustration. Relief because it seemed like the stains were going to come out just fine without doing damage to the vest. Frustration because it was going to take time. Time he knew he had but it was still grating.

“Thank you, Mrs Henderson,” he said instead of...all that. “I appreciate you doing this for me.”

Claudia smiled. “Of course, dear. You’ve been so good to Dusty and that other boy, too. It’s the least I could for all of you.”

Steve did his goofy handshake with Dustin and bid him goodbye. After all, he had another vest to work on.

*

Steve got out all the things Jeff and them had helped him get. The first was a denim jacket. Brian had lent him some special scissors that wouldn’t shred the fabric and told him under pain of death to not let them near anything other than fabric.

Steve had gave him a jaunty salute and promised on his life not to ruin these special scissors.

He carefully cut off the sleeves and tossed them aside. Steve wasn’t good at sewing, but Gareth insisted he didn’t have to be, he just had to make sure that enough the badge was affixed to the vest so it didn’t fall off. The pins were easier.

Black Sabbath, Mercyful Fate, Iron Maiden, Metallica, Dio, and a bunch of others that Steve could only vaguely recognize. But Jeff had assured him that these were Eddie’s favorites and that there weren’t any on here that he didn’t like.

Steve was grateful for the reassurance that they weren’t going to sabotage him in this. He carefully laid out the t-shirt he was going to cut up for the back and marked it off with the white tailors’ chalk he found in the top drawer of his dad’s dresser.

He painstakingly cut the shirt and stitched it onto the back. Once he was satisfied he placed it in the box he had prepared just for this purpose. He wrapped in a single black ribbon.

He stretched and looked over at the clock. Shit!

It was already after visiting hours at the hospital. And he hadn’t eaten since lunch several hours ago. He sighed.

Steve made himself a sandwich and glumly munched away at it. He hadn’t meant to not to visit Eddie today. In fact the plan was to at least spend an hour or so with him. But he had gotten so excited about the vest he was making he had completely forgotten about the person he was making it for.

He ate about half of his sandwich before tossing away the rest. His stomach turned, an uneasy queasy feeling. He wished he could blame on the guilt. That would be easier and far less painful than the truth.

A migraine was coming on.

Steve turned off the lights and turned down the heater so the house was a cool sixty degrees. He got into comfy clothes and took the strongest painkillers he had available. He laid down on his bed and buried deep under the covers.

Shit.

Migraines.

He closed his eyes against the throbbing pain in his head. He was going to have to make sure he brought sunglasses and painkillers with him to this concert. The last thing he wanted to do is ruin this for Eddie because his head decided a metal concert was the place to implode.

*

Steve picked up the vest from Dustin’s. It was very clean and a little worn, but it was perfect.

He gave her a hug.

“Hey, you want to come with me to see Eddie?” Steve asked Dustin.

Dustin shook his head. “I promised Will I’d hang out with him today. Plus I saw Eddie yesterday.

Steve smiled. “Say hi to Will for me.”

“Always,” Dustin replied.

Steve bid them both goodbye and dashed off to his car, trying not to jump for joy. Everything was going to plan.

Now all he had to do is let the person all this was for know this was happening.

He dashed into Eddie’s hospital room and skidded to a stop. There was a girl talking to him.

“Steve!” Eddie said, peering around her.

“Oh, hi,” he mumbled. “I didn’t know you had company. I can come back later.”

The girl turned around and it was Vickie. “Hi, Steve. I was just dropping something off for Robin. She forgot to bring the cookies she made him when she was here yesterday.”

Steve smiled. “She told me. I offered to bring them but she said she had covered. I guess she meant you.”

Vickie grinned. “Yup!” She waved bye to them both and skipped out.

“What amazing and wonderful thing have you brought me today, Stevie?”

Steve stepped further into the room. “You aren’t mad I didn’t come yesterday?”

Eddie shook his head. “I knew you were working and volunteering so I figured you just didn’t have the time.”

“I got a migraine,” Steve murmured. “Otherwise I would have been here.”

Eddie blinked up at him and mouthed ‘Oh.’

“But I did have a surprise for you,” Steve continued.

Eddie looked around him but didn’t see any bags or anything with him. “Like what?”

“I spoke to Dr Hathaway and Eric your physical therapist and they have given me permission to take you out this weekend provided I bring you back on Monday to make sure everything still looks good.”

Eddie’s jaw dropped. “All weekend?”

Steve rocked back on his heels with a big grin on his face. “Yup. We’ll be leaving on Saturday and coming back Monday morning.”

“And where pray tell are you taking me?” Eddie asked, a small, shy smile on his face.

“Indy.”

Eddie’s eyes widen so much, Steve was afraid they were going to fall out. “And why is it going to be all weekend?”

“There are some things we need to pick up for the main event on Sunday and thought it would be great to just see the city, get the hell out of Hawkins for a bit.”

Eddie opened his mouth but Steve held up his hand. “I’m not going to tell you what the main event is. That’s the surprise. But I have it on very good authority that you are going to love it.”

Eddie eyed him suspiciously. “Whose?”

Steve started counting off on his fingers. “Wayne, and Jeff, and Gareth, and I would say Brian, too, but right now I don’t think he’d even give me the time of day if I asked.”

Eddie chuckled. “He’ll come around.”

“So how about it, Eds?” Steve asked. “You want to come with me to Indy for the weekend?”

Eddie tapped his lips thoughtfully. “Well, I mean since you put so much effort into this it would be a waste if I said no...so...”

Steve raised an eyebrow. “I could take Dustin instead, you know.”

Eddie waved his arms around. “No, no. I’ll go. I’ll be good I promise.”

Steve laughed. “Nah, I wouldn’t have taken Dustin. This is too good for even him.”

“But not too good for me?” Eddie asked.

Steve leaned over the guardrail and grinned. “Oh I think it’s just perfect for you.”

Eddie blushed. “So what are we going to do about lodgings? You Harringtons got some fancy hotel we’re going to be staying in or something?”

Steve laughed. “No. But I’ve spent very little of my own money on this weekend. So don’t you worry about that, either.”

Eddie frowned. “You are being really, really cryptic about all this, you know?”

“I don’t know what you mean,” Steve said all faux innocence.

“The hell you don’t, Stevie,” Eddie said.

Part 8  Part 9  Part 10  Part 11  Part 12 Part 13 Part 14  Part 15 Part 16 Part 17  Part 18  Part 19  Part 20

Tag List: @anaibis @spectrum-spectre @estrellami-1 @zerokrox-blog @artiststarme @swimmingbirdrunningrock @gregre369  @obliosworld @goodolefashionedloverboi @chaoticlovingdreamer @maya-custodios-dionach @messrs-weasley @val-from-lawrence @plyerice27 @thedragonsaunt @chaoticlovingdreamer @sapphirecobalt-1 @a-little-unsteddie @i-must-potato @danili666  @carlyv @rozzieroos @wonderland-girl143-blog @itsall-taken @justforthedead89 @whalesharksart @nburkhardt @snapshotmaestro @shrimply-a-menace @theotalksalot @child-of-cthulhu @bookbinderbitch @cr0w-culture @punctualhowell @eddiemunsonswife

[the-disaster-in-waiting]

The Seamstress & The Baker

(Peeta Mellark X Reader)

Peeta stood still as the woman circled him measuring, writing and looking over him gauging size predictions.

“I’m Peeta” He broke the silence, scared and alone from the only other person he’d known. Peeta tried to make nice with those Effie had called his ‘Style Team’ Portia had left him in what she’d called capable hands of (Y/N) to take the measurements and prepare him for Cinna and her grand entrance they’d planned.

“I know I saw the show Katniss put on. Seems like you will have to catch up” (Y/N) swaggered around the room filled with items used to create all the most incredible outfits for the tributes.

“Wha… What do you mean?”

“Katniss, she’s the caring heart that volunteered for her sister. What pray tell is your thing?” She’d sat in a chair at that point comfortably crossing one leg over another, writing more notes in her small notebook. As Peeta realized he was now free to step down from the podium and sit beside her in the accompanying chair he continued.

“I’m a baker”

“I do not think a cake will be enough to sway the watchers” She leant over, placing the notebook onto a coffee table leaning back and digging her back further into the chair comforting herself.

“What do you think then?” Peeta was leant over watching (Y/N) arms braced on his legs as his only support. (Y/N) sighed as she turned to the screen featuring Peeta and Katniss’ tribute selection in district 12.

“You are very sweet and the way you look at Katniss. Use that, use your love, don't hide it. Be the boy who loves a girl you will be fated to kill or be killed by”.

“I don’t know what you mean. I don't have a crush on Katniss. I just don’t wanna die”

“You are a very sweet boy Peeta. I wish I could be like you but unlike you living in the capitol shows you how bad this all is I mean look around-’ (Y/N) spread her arms pointing to the whole room ‘-this all just for some stupid blood hungry game, I was picked young because so many of the seamstress’ had to leave overwhelmed seeing so many die this isn't easy Peeta you need to make a choice do you play the game or let the game play you?”

-

Peeta gazed over all the viewers as Katniss and he were pulled by horse through a long lane waving to all he looked to Katniss her face stone, scared or maybe meek he couldn’t tell quite yet as he passed a row he could see (Y/N) she looked over Peeta clasping her hands together signaling something to him it took a minute to catch on.

“And then

What is that in the background?” The commentators reviewing the tributes' entrances stopped at a pair from district 12.

“Come on. They'll love it.” Peeta whispered to Katniss, grabbing her hand once again, hoisting them high above their heads for all to see as (Y/N) clapped her hands at Peeta’s gesture.

“Now see that! I love that.

Two young people, holding their hands up!

Saying; ‘I'm proud, I'm from District 12.

We will not be overlooked!’

I love that.

People are sure to be paying attention to them right now.”

-

“You did good Peeta” (Y/N) could tell when Peeta entered the room he carried himself lower than a capital citizen and not many of the other tributes walked around the seamstress quarters their stylists normally handled. (Y/N) wondered if some even knew where it was knowing that some of the higher districts would demand their measurements taken in their apartments not bothering to meander about a place they didn’t want to be.

“Thanks for the suggestion” He stood around awkwardly waiting for (Y/N) to turn and face him, her back all he could see as she bent over a sewing machine the sound of which had stopped the minute the door opened.

“What do you need, do any of the clothes not fit?” She turned to face him looking over his attire, a piece she’d made from Portia's suggestion designed to look as if lava had fallen onto him.

“No I’m all good” He moved to a chair near (Y/N) making himself comfortable before facing her again.

“The interviews are coming soon”

“Yes, do you know what you are saying yet? I’m sure Effie and Haymitch have prepared you?” She pulled up the suit she was making from Katniss’ measurements designed by the game stylists out of the sewing machine letting it fall in front of her giving a cursory check before putting it aside and putting all her focus on Peeta.

“No Haymitch said to just keep doing the loverboy act and Effie’s just happy I smile unlike Katniss.” (Y/N) giggled at Peeta’s comment.

“Katniss can be hard to read but like you she is scared and just coping with this how she can”

“So what do you think?” Peeta looked to (Y/N) as her head tilted.

“What do you mean?” She shook her head and started to read from her notebook on Peeta’s measurements and needs for his game suit. Peeta grabbed the book from her hands, putting it behind him where (Y/N) couldn't reach it.

“I mean the interviews the hand hold worked I thought maybe you’d have some more ideas” He held (Y/N) back from trying to grab her notebook from him. Exasperated by her failed attempts she slumped in the chair and sighed at Peetas annoying antics.

“Why should I help you if you will just steal my things?” She smirked at the game, a welcome distraction from the work she’d been put through by the other seamstress’ all had goals to complete their work even if it meant fighting each other to leave early.

“Because you care? Hopefully, you've helped so far?”

“Fine you are lucky I like you” She instead turned to clean her station making her mind up to come in early tomorrow instead of continuing now that the tribute was annoying her so.

“Drop the bomb”

“What bomb” noticing her cleaning her gave back the notebook. (Y/N) carefully packed it away in her bag as she shifted it onto her back.

“Tell them just who you are fighting in the arena, let them know the love story they can expect” She turned to stand and leave as Peeta followed her.

“Where are you going?” She turned to look at Peeta. He looked tired, scared but alone mostly. She could understand the feeling of displacement he must’ve felt she’d felt it so many times before.

“I have some things to finish for school. They cannot be left waiting but do not worry, I will be waiting for you after your interview”.

[generational-atrophy]

Привет! Я здесь впервые. Можно ли запросить какие-нибудь яндере хедканоны для Нидерландов, Швеции и Дании. Заранее спасибо!☆

hetalia netherlands, sweden, and denmark yandere headcanons

1.0k words ~ gender neutral headcanons

tw: typical yandere tws, violence, unhealthy relationships

a/n: Привет!!!! Спасибо за быдет здесь ! Я буду писать по-английски, потому что мой русский только разговорный, извини ): hopefully soon i will be better lol

Netherlands

Abel may not be a fatal Yandere, but that doesn’t make him any less dangerous.

It's unlikely that you would know him in the first place. Despite his striking appearance, he's never been the kind of person to socialize, much less make friends. You wouldn't remember how you met him, but he would remember how he met you.

You were walking across the street during a busy day, talking to whoever was on your phone. You blended easily into the crowd. The moment was anything but memorable, much less extraordinary. But it was just that for him.

You wouldn't even realize he had been following you until weeks later. You were returning from work when suddenly you felt large hands grabbing you from behind, and then everything went dark.

Your life after that was simple. Wake up in his countryside estate, do the housework, garden, sew, and cook until he returns. The home had to be completely spotless from top to bottom, or you would be punished.

Every single thing that you do from dawn to dusk must be perfect. Even the smallest speck of dusk, the tiniest malfeasance, was justification for him to drag you to the cellar by your hair.

There you would remain, naked and freezing, until he decided you truly understood the mistake you had made. To earn his respect, not only as a partner but as a person, you must be perfect.

Sometimes it's easy to believe that he doesn't love you.  Which is true, to an extent, as he's very forceful in his shaping of you. But... he does love you. Yes, he chose you because of your potential, but he still loves the things that make you...  you. Even if he never acts on that love.

Your relationship will be rather dry. He is not particularly violent, nor is he particularly attracted or affectionate towards you. Abel wants you to be his partner in life before he wants you to be a romantic partner.

Despite his unreasonably high standards for you, he'd be a pretty placid Yandere. He doesn't have a violent temper, and he does care for you genuinely. His ways of showing that are just... horrible.

Sweden

Berwald is a... surprising Yandere, to say the least. He's very hard to predict, and understanding him is a task fit for nobody

You two were friends, neither close nor distant, when he fell in love. There would've been no way for you to know this, of course, considering how he barely acted like he liked you in the first place.

The way you found out was no more comforting. You were awoken in the middle of the night to find a handcuff around your wrist, tying you to your bed frame. And when you looked over, you were met with the daunting and unreadable face of Berwald.

Then, he explained what was going to happen. You were going to marry him, and you two would begin living together. No questions, no consideration of your own feelings, only... a statement. Then, he released you.

You tried to go to the police, only to receive absolutely no help. Seems like he had known you'd do that, and had prepared beforehand accordingly. By the time you returned to your home, your things were already gone and shipped to his home.

But once you accept your fate, Berwald is not very controlling. Yes, he expects you to love him and live with him, but whatever you want to do outside of that is totally fine with him. He's not overly paranoid, and can't seem to get upset with you over anything.

You're a free person, as long as you don't try to break up with him. Then, he may begin locking you in the house more often.

He's not very affectionate, but he loves spending time with you. Your voice is like music to his ears, and he can't get enough of hearing you talk. He loves every single part of you. He loves you so much that sometimes you worry you're the one manipulating him!

But when you bring up that concern, he won't dissuade you. It's better for him to be the victim in your eyes anyway. Maybe then you won't even think of another man, wracked with guilt over your actions... yes, that'd be perfect.

Denmark

Mathias is a deceptive Yandere.

When you two are originally friends, you wonder if he could ever hurt anyone on purpose. But when he drags you kicking and screaming home after your latest escape attempt, you wonder if he could ever truly love anyone.

He's methodical about his Yandere tendencies. He isn't impatient or harsh, he makes you love him before he finally takes you home. By the time you're chained up in one of his spare rooms, he's made sure absolutely nobody would ever wonder where you went.

Your relationship is nothing more than a game to him. Yes, he loves you, but not as a boyfriend should. He loves your desperation, your weakness... there's nothing more fun to him than forcing you into more and more pathetic states.

He loves building you up just to tear you down. Somedays, he wakes you up with a kiss on your forehead and breakfast in bed. Other days, you're woken up by him picking you up out of bed and throwing you to the floor.

Mathias has quite a temper too. It doesn't come out quite often, but when it does, you're the target of all of his pent-up anger.

It's hard to tell if he's aware of his horrible thoughts. Sometimes, he acts like he doesn't realize he's hurting you. But other times, he's clearly torturing you on purpose.

Either way, you'll quickly learn it's better to just not cross him. Even when he's smiling, you never know when that facade could drop. Especially in front of his family, you've learned how to pretend everything's alright.

And if you truly escaped... you have no idea what he would do. That's almost a scarier thought than the reality of staying with Mathias.

[ryusuisloveinterest]

Hiiiii!! Hi enjoyed the domestic headcanon very much!! Could you write what would be a date with husband!Ryusui please ? I just love him so much he’s my n°1 anime crush🤭.

Welcome back girlypop! I understand i love love Ryusui❤️ i assumed you wanted a drabble so that’s what I wrote. It’s kinda long but I hope you like it 💕

A date with your husband, Ryusui

It’s a good thing you aren’t claustrophobic, because the amount of people surrounding you right now is absurd. Makeup artist grabbing your face, tailors finishing sewing the dress/suit you’re already wearing, and hair stylist yanking and putting up your hair. You were used to it at this point, after all you had been modeling for years now. I’m fact it’s exactly how you met your husband, Ryusui. Right before the petrification of everyone in the world, the Nanami Conglomerate wanted to venture out and produce things besides ships. They started producing jewelry, perfumes and colognes, even kitchen utensils. But when they starting making clothes, that’s when you were called in. Very soon, you were one of the Nanami Conglomerates top models. There was photo shoot where you had to showcase watches; you were told you’d get a partner to pose with, but you didn’t think it be the heir of the Nanami Conglomerate himself. Safe to say you both adored each other. Even after everyone was petrified, you two thought about each other, and when Ryusui was revived, he wouldn’t dare do a thing without you by his side. After all the work and finding out who the Medusa really was, he bent down on one knee and asked to you to be his forever and in return he would be yours. It’s been a few years since that fateful day, having been married for two of them. 

You take one final breath before stepping out on the runway, everyone clapping and cameras flashing. There’s one distinct voice that sticks out above the rest… “(Y/n)! Over here! You look so beautiful my amazing wife/husband/partner! “ You can see the people around him get annoyed (especially the photographers) but he could care less. Right now all he wants to do is support his partner

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After the runway, and the close up photos, AND the after party, you sit in the back seat of a limousine with Ryusui with socks and sandals, one of his sweaters, and some sweatpants. You lean onto his shoulder, exhausted from the hectic day. “You did amazing love! That’s no surprise though, you’ve been this good from the first time I met you.” You softly smile, his words never stopped making your heart flutter. “Thank you darling…” you whisper back. “Why don’t you get some rest for a while? We’ll be home shortly.” You nod and take a short nap, falling asleep to the sound of his breath. 

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A few minutes pass when Ryusui wakes you up. As your eyes flutter open you can tell you’re not at home, but you know exactly where you are. Ryusui opens the door for you helping you out of the limo. You follow him into the woods, leading to a small picnic on the edge of a cliff. It hasn’t changed since he proposed to you. There were small candles glowing, flowers placed on the ground, and a small speaker with your favorite music playing. “What’s all this for love?” You question to him. He laughs, “Do you not know the date today?” The date? It’s just November 17….oh shit. “Oh my gosh, Ryusui I’m so sorry it just slipped my mind!” How could you forget your anniversary?? Ryusui treats you like a queen every day and you didn’t even remember to get him a gift for your anniversary? “Please forgive me Ryusui! I can’t believe I forgot! With the rehearsals and the fittings and-“ Ryusui laughs even louder this time. “You think I’m upset? Dear I know how busy you’ve been this month, I see how tired you are when you get home. I haven’t even seen you draw I’m forever!” You smile at him, how were you so lucky? “Come love, let me spoil you.” He helps you sit down, opening the picnic basket with your favorite foods and treats. You sit together for what feels like hours and enjoying each other’s company. You shared kiss after kiss, on your lips, on your cheeks, your nose your neck. The wine bottle and grapes are finished along with the snacks sandwiches. As your laughter dies, you can hear one of your favorite songs, the first song you and Ryusui danced to when you were married. “Do you hear you the song darling?” You ask him. “How could I not? It’s the song that reminds me of you.” He stands, offering his hand. You take it as he lifts you gently. One hand holds your hand and his other on you waist; your hand on his shoulder. Your bodies touch as you two dance, your head leans on his chest, his heart acting as the best melody. “Happy anniversary Ryusui…” you whisper to him, kissing his chest. “Happy anniversary (y/n), I love you so much, more than you’ll ever know.”

[tangjiali-purpleyaohua]

The drama is a non-romance drama. But the relationship between Qiu Qingzhi and Li Bing is more romantic than mere hetero romance CP. Tbh, the back story of Qiu-Bing is really fits the childhood sweetheart CP. Li Bing was an obedient, rather quiet child before he met Qiu Qingzhi, but then Qiu Qingzhi bent him. Li Bing became more of a lively person and carefree. As they both grew up together, they were like an inseparable pair of a spoiled Young Lady (Young Master, LOL) from an aristocratic family and a reliable bodyguard who pampered him a lot. Maybe Qiu Qingzhi only did his duty as a servant in Li family. Maybe he did it to pay Li family's kindness as he didn't like to owe others. Or maybe it's because Li Bing's poor health. Or maybe, deep down in his heart, he secretly developed feelings for Li Bing. When he was with Li Bing, he looked happy. I wonder how many times he carried that spoiled Young Master on his back.

Note : unfortunately, they cut this sweet scene! So unfair! Kudos to Wei Zheming. He's so strong that he can piggy back Ding Yuxi so easily like he weighs nothing. Xiao-Ding is so slim. His waist is really small that even women might envy him. But xiao-Ding is a tall man! I don't really think that he really weighs nothing.😂

Qiu Qingzhi is a confident man. He studied & cultivated himself hard, not only for himself, but because he wanted to be a strong man who Li Bing could lean on. However, Li Bing is still the unreachable moon for him. The said Young Master is always out of his reach because of the huge gap between their social status. Even if he knew that the kind hearted Li Bing never treated him like a servant, but an equal of himself, Qiu Qingzhi still felt that he wasn't worth him. I believe that's the reason why he wanted to join the army. Li Bing half jokingly told him not to come back, if he wasn't a General yet.

Qiu Qingzhi gave his dagger to Li Bing. It's his precious item. At first, I thought that he left it, so that Li Bing could use it to protect himself when he was away. But there's no need to do so. Li Bing was safe in his mansion. His father and his men would do their best to protect him since he was the youngest child (sadly, he's also the weakest) in his family. Therefore, I wildly guessed that it was a love token from Qiu Qingzhi. In folktales, the husband/boyfriend would give a weapon to his wife/girlfriend before he went to join the battlefield as a token of love. Look at the way Li Bing touched the dagger so fondly. Li Bing also gave his pouch to Qiu Qingzhi. Somehow, I recalled that the wife/girlfriend would sew a pouch and insert a charm in it and then give it to her husband/boyfriend, wishing that her husband/boyfriend would return home safely.

Qiu Qingzhi did his best, turning himself to be a "monster" in the battlefield to prove himself and partly to make Li Bing's dream come true, so he could proudly come back to Li Bing. Sadly, that's when the cruel fate showed its fangs.

And the rest is history. Qiu Qingzhi only wanted the best for his precious person in his heart. He's a selfless who wished nothing, but Li Bing's happiness. Even if he needed to sacrifice himself.

The sad thing that I thought about their relationship was Qiu Qingzhi gave the medicine that could make Li Bing turn back into a normal human, but in the end, Li Bing didn't use it. In the Netherworld, Qiu Qingzhi would wait for his Li Bing to cross the Naihe bridge together, so that they couldn't be separated away when they reincarnate to the next life. However, his long time waiting would bear no fruit since Li Bing was immortal after he became a Demon Cat. It's kinda ironic. Back then he was going to die soon because of his incurable illness when he was young. But then after Yi Zihua transformed him into a Demon Cat like him, he became immortal. Yi Zihua managed to live a long life. Li Bing would do too, unless he stabbed himself with that dagger which Qiu Qingzhi gave him (as a love token, LOL). His time was endless.

Just how long for Qiu Qingzhi to finally realise that Li Bing would never come to the Netherworld? I wonder if Qiu Qingzhi would cross the bridge alone later once he realised the fact that Li Bing didn't eat the medicine? I bet that he would cross the Naihe bridge without drinking the Mengpo soup in order to keep his memory about Li Bing, so in the next life he could still find his Li Bing.

Ding Yuxi is naturally pretty. He cried beautifully, just like a pear blossom bathed in the rain; a weeping beauty. His snow-white hair made his appearance more outstanding. Ethereal beauty. His acting is really amazing in this scene. Wei Zheming did great too! They both are great actors.

Somehow I thought that this scene was like the bitter scene of a helpless ML and a weeping beauty FL in hetero romance drama. 😅 Argh! I read and watched too many BL!