#because female-directed content always hits different ngl

[fyeahfandomtrash]

Things I loved about twenty twenty:

female directed and written!! hello!!! more of this please!! i love how much a female director can change how characters are portrayed.

osts were lit. the pentagon title track instrumental is now in an eternal loop in my brain.

dahee’s growth! loved how she was always the one that took initiative to break out of her shell and it wasn’t because someone else was influencing her. such a refreshing female lead.

i love how her shyness and her social awkwardness gave her a tsundere feel on the outside. i was surprised by how prickly she was, and i loved it. it was so cute seeing her opening up to hyunjin and yeeun throughout the show

skam is one of my favorite shows of all time and i’ve watched a few of the international remakes. twenty twenty fits incredibly well in terms of vibe, the types of stories they focus on, and the age of the characters. both hyunjin and dahee have such skam-esque storylines that i really felt the full nostalgia watching these two grow and falling for each other

yeeun is amazing and i want her as a friend. she’s basically that extrovert that adopted the introvert dahee and those kind of friendships are the sweetest

hyunjin’s feelings for dahee were so heart-fluttering and i loved how much he supported her in making her own decisions and never got posessive when they started dating. his frustration over that whole coming of age day fiasco was justified. dahee needed that push from him to realize that she needs to stop getting treaded over hajoon.

speaking of hyunjin that confession scene was so so cute. just the casual “i like you. how about you?” summed up his personality so well. he’s a comforting presence for her, he’s clear about his feelings and intentions with dahee, and he’s considerate and wants to hear what she thinks immediately after confessing. that lighting in the studio room was just *sigh* so romantic. it added to the surrealist/dream-like nature of that whole scene

honestly, just hyunjin in general lol. he was also very shy/introverted and his lack of expressions give him the tsundere vibe as well, but he never made the 01z group and dahee feel like he didn’t care about them. he’s just genuinely a nice person and his personality suited dahee so well.

the relationship between dahee and hyunjin was so so lovely. i have absolutely nothing but nice, positive things to say about these two. they really just vibed so well together. it was never explicitly said why she kissed him in the first place in epsiode 3, but you could tell that she liked him back in high school and was feeling reckless in the moment and just went for it (also hyunjin’s casual “just make the decision. it’s not that big of a deal once you make it” probably emboldened her). both of them falling for each other and finding comfort in each other was so sweet, and the way they quietly care for each other was so adorable. they also knew from the start to respect each other’s boundaries and both liked their independence in the other person. just a super healthy relationship where they started off as friends and seamlessly realized their feelings for each other. 

hyunjin, bohyun, and yeeun’s fashion. i love how much you could understand their personality by how they dressed.

ACE’s chan was absolutely amazing in this. he really went all-out with the comedic relief character and had amazing chemistry with literally everyone in the show.

[princesscatherinemiddleton]

My thoughts and feelings on the Great British Divorce, as written on January 18th (and updated on February 19th)

I wrote a very long and detailed essay on my feelings when the Sussexes stood down and it was super cathartic. I’ve not reread it since (although I have added one final paragraph) but I am going to make you all read it...

Prince Harry announces he is dating Meghan Markle

I had Meghan Markle down with Ellie Goulding, Mollie from The Saturdays, Caroline Flack, and Jenna Coleman as famous women Harry has “dated” that would never come to anything. Then, on a completely normal day when I was at work, Harry released his statement. It was completely unprecedented. Everyone in the staffroom was talking about it, saying things like “I didn’t even know he was dating/Diana would want to see him happy/Who is she?”. And I knew they would be for keeps. This one would become Mrs Harry.

Engagement announcement

Do you want to know what my initial reaction was when the engagement was announced? Fear and worry. I was so so scared that Harry’s fiancé would be put through the same awful treatment Kate had gone through. I was also worried that Meghan would be pitted against Kate and vice versa – I hadn’t spent all those years watching people drag Kate against Diana/Sophie/Camilla/[insert female royal here] to live it again with Harry’s fiancé. But, despite my fears and the initial sinking feeling of dread, I was still excited. Apart from George’s first day at school, Harry and Meghan’s engagement announcement remains the only event with no Kate appearance that has a tag on my blog. I fell in love with the brilliant, charismatic, intelligent woman in the engagement interview. I was excited for the future.

Pre-wedding engagements

My main memory of how I felt at the time was disappointment at Meghan’s outfits. Where had my stylish young professional gone? Why was she wearing these wide-legged trousers that dragged on the floor with long coats? But I genuinely thought they both did really well. Meghan came across as personable and warm and intelligent. They were clearly in sync. They were a modern young couple and the perfect counterpart to the stability of the Cambridges.

Wedding

I was at uni when the wedding happened. I took the day off work and travelled home for one day to surprise my mum and watch the wedding with her. My auntie called me minutes before Meghan appeared to talk to me because she was watching it and she “knew” I was on my own in Bournemouth. When Meghan appeared, I literally crawled in front of the TV and sat inches from the screen so I could see her emerge in her dress in all its glory (I was disappointed, ngl). I cried during her wedding. I’d spent the morning spotting celebrities and Kate was there and the bridal party was fantastic. Meghan’s tiara shone like the jewel she was. Charles, Camilla, and Doria were literally angelic. After the wedding I went to my auntie’s house to watch the FA Cup final (as a family, we always do that and have a BBQ) and I spent all my time on my phone waiting for photos of their evening outfits. I cried again when I saw Meghan’s Stella dress. It’s one of my favourite wedding outfits of all time. I’m a super fussy bitch and I had plenty of complaints with the wedding and I have aired them before but it was a truly happy and wonderful day and I was happy and content.

Post-wedding engagements

I know I’m literally only talking about Meghan but I don’t pay attention to Harry so I barely know if he’s there or not. I think Meghan hit the ground running. She did some brilliant engagements during the time post-wedding and pre-Archie. Her patronage choices were inspired and the work she did with her patronages is some of my favourite Meghan work. Obviously, she also created the Together Cookbook, which doesn’t need going into. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, Meghan would have been the Anne of this generation of royals, quietly getting the numbers and doing fantastic work. Meghan was connecting with people no one else could in a way no one had since Harry himself. She quite literally made the role her own.

Faux Pas

Meghan had teething problems but, most of the time, I put them down to cultural differences. Things like talking about abortion in Ireland – any British person knows not to do that. More importantly, it was a political statement, which is, essentially, “against the rules”. I think Meghan would have grown out of these, as she was making far less of them already, in the same way Kate, Camilla, Sophie, and Diana grew out of them. I also think the general public opinion wasn’t as positive as social media has people believe. I was talking to Cece about this but the Africa documentary went down badly. If it wasn’t for Andy’s well-timed interview, I think it would have been a much bigger deal but, as it was, it was swept under the carpet. Don’t get me wrong, I think Meghan made some incredible points in the documentary that deserved being aired BUT I never heard anyone in the real world say anything positive about those decisions. I think, during their time together, both Harry and Meghan made mistakes that warranted criticism and I don’t think they ever received that criticism because…

Press treatment of Meghan

Has every royal woman received incredibly negative headlines? Yes. Has Kate and her family been treated awfully by the press? Yes. Do I find it funny when people make comments like “look, Meghan touched her baby bump and people hate her and they loved it when Kate did it” when I had to sit through people talking about what trailer trash Kate was for touching her bump in her first two pregnancies? Yes. Was Meghan compared to Kate in the same way Kate was compared to Sophie and Sarah compared to Diana? Yes. Was Meghan’s coverage actually that different from the coverage Kate got? No. Did Meghan receive worse coverage than any other British royal? Yes. Without a doubt.

I’ve stayed away from talking about race too much. I am a white woman. I look like a “stereotypically” Jewish woman as my family is Jewish. A large proportion of my family is either from the Republic of Ireland or the Irish travelling community. I’ve seen my family be subject to abuse because of their ethnicity. My mum has scars because her house was set on fire as a child because her dad was Irish. Despite that, I have no idea what it is like to experience racism. I’ve had the most closeted white woman life when it comes to matters of race. None of the things I described was racism in the way Meghan experienced it and none of it means I am in a position where I can join in on this conversation. I have spent years learning about racism and every day I find myself coming across something that I hadn’t considered, like the idea that Meghan is a good mum for going back to work so quickly is a form of positive discrimination and we should tackle that. I genuinely don’t know how much I should get involved in these conversations but I also don’t want to add to emotional labour by continuously directing these conversations towards people of colour.

Coming from my position of privilege, Meghan received some truly awful and horrific treatment at the hands of the press and the public. She was humiliated, her family history and private life was raked over, she was blamed for war because she ate an avocado one time? I can only assume Harry is really good in bed because there is no way I would have stayed with him if I had to go through what Meghan went through. Announcing they were suing the press was still the dumbest thing I’ve ever seen though.

BRF & Meghan

The BRF could have – and should have – done more to protect Meghan from the press. However, I think it was naïve to ever assume they would. I could talk until I’m blue in the face about how it would have helped Meghan’s confidence (and the BRF’s PR) to make a statement like “The Queen and the royal family are greatly distressed at the treatment of the Duchess of Sussex…”. I could talk about how the BRF uses symbolism rather than statements and I watched you all talk about how the Queen loves Meghan because she went on the royal train and had a solo engagement with the Queen so don’t pretend for one minute that you all don’t know that. I could talk about William releasing a statement (which everyone glosses over but go off, I guess). I could talk about how, if the Queen did not release a statement, Kate couldn’t very well have gone off and released one on her own (also, how come it’s always The Queen, Charles, Will, and Kate, where is Camilla?). But there’s no point. They should have done more. It was a massive oversight not to consider how being a woman of colour would affect Meghan’s treatment after becoming a member of the firm and they had a duty to help protect her. But no one should ever have thought it would have happened. The BRF look after number 1 and that, right now, is the Queen. That’s how it has always been. They treated Meghan the same way they treat everyone who isn’t in the direct line (also Andrew but that’s Andrew). As Katie says, anything else would have blown up in Meghan’s face. If I was in charge of the BRF’s PR, I would not have advised them to say anything.

Archie

Archie is a precious angel and I refuse to hear otherwise.

Archie’s birth was poorly handled by Sara but I don’t care. It was cute. Archie’s christening was foolishly handled by the Sussexes. I also don’t massively care. It’s miniscule in comparison to the bigger fish at play. Despite that, the only people who would have cared who Archie’s godparents were, are on this site. By refusing to allow the small bit of access the public get to christenings, it annoyed people who barely even know who Archie is. And we’re still talking about it today. I said to a friend recently that most British people only care about royals when it comes to weddings, babies, and money. With a wedding in Windsor, not London, and on a Saturday (meaning no bank holiday), coupled with a messy birth announcement, no “Lindo Wing” appearance, and the godparent faux pas, they missed golden opportunities to help the public fall in love with them and their family. There’s a reason the Cambridge kids are always seen after a PR disaster.

Sussex Statement

My opinion on the statement? Massively poorly handled. I think the BRF knew the Sussexes wanted out but did not know the statement would be released. This doesn’t contradict anything anyone has said. Harry and Meghan are right to leave. Mentally, and also for their family. They will flourish outside of the confines of the BRF. I also think Harry messed up by releasing the statement when he did. By forcing the hand, the public was calling for them to lose their funding before a decision had to be made (and lo and behold, they lost their funding), rather than being able to release a full statement confirming how much money they would keep. TLDR; good idea, hope it all works out, awfully handled.

Sussex/BRF Resolution

I think it was the best possible solution. I’m a little shocked they are completely stepping down but, as time goes on, I’m not surprised. I think the Sussexes clearly expected to be more half in/half out because their website had a whole section dedicated to royal work and supporting the Queen and taxpayer funding. The website used their titles. There are still things to work out (Duchy funding? How will they repay the taxpayers? Will they go to Trooping? Will they answer letters? SussexRoyal) but I think it’s a good middle ground.

Overall thoughts

The Sussexes are right to leave. The way they left was messy af and I blame Harry for that. I don’t think Meghan was innocent in how they left but I blame Harry for being so trigger happy. They made some bad PR moves in the last few months: announcing they were suing the press (do it quietly or they’ll just come after you more), the documentary, the statement. I think the press will be after them even more now and I think it’s interesting looking at how many times we’ve seen Meghan papped in Canada this year compared to the times we saw her papped in the UK since 2017. I also think, long term, they will lose their star power and become Reese Witherspoon levels of famous. Everyone knows who she is, most people like her, she does some good philanthropic work, she gets freebies, that’s pretty much it. Meghan and Harry’s appeal (and this goes for every single royal) is in the fact they are royal. Without the connection to the BRF, they’re just rich people preaching.

I’m also very sad. I thought Meghan would come back, post maternity leave, with a new project and put everyone else to shame. I thought she would take on new patronages, do a solo overseas visit, and generally flourish as a young working mum. We will see far less of her than we thought we would. I doubt we’ll see little Archie much at all. As for Harry, I can officially say that the most amusing and upsetting thing to come out of this has been seeing good, kind, left-wing people brown nose a rich, privileged, racist, quite frankly dangerous white man because he married a good woman. I think he will struggle more out of the royal bubble than in it because he’s lost the little structure he had.

Harry was always going to leave the royal family. Meghan might have been a catalyst, but she is not the cause. There is nothing the BRF could have done – no statement – that would have stopped him. He did a whole interview about how much he hates being a royal and then said the public need royals. In his new life as a whatever he is now, my biggest worry is that he will spend more time talking publicly about issues like mental health, without understanding what he is saying. I hope I’m wrong and that he flourishes and becomes a force to be reckoned with. But, while I know Meghan will do brilliantly, I have no idea what he’ll do.

Meghan, Archie, I hope you flourish. I can’t wait to see what you do next. Harry. Sayonara, biatch.

A final update

I thought I should give my thoughts on this now – mid-February – after the dust has settled. I genuinely miss a lot of the people the Sussexes brought to the fandom. I miss planning outfits for Meg to wear to events, I miss predicting what Meghan’s next patronages might be. I miss seeing Meghan interacting with the public, because that was where she shone. We now know the Sussexes will formally split on March 31st, after a final set of engagements. I’m super looking forward to these engagements and judging the vibe from everyone there. We also know it’s likely they will have to rebrand (my bet is Sussex Foundation) and I’m assuming this rebrand will happen in April/May time, possibly around their anniversary. Honestly, I was expecting to see more of them. I was expecting more posts on their Instagram about private visits to charities. I was definitely not expecting them to jump straight to JP Morgan and start attending exclusive events. Rich people going to rich people, I guess. Despite that, Meghan and Harry could start a business selling rubber ducks and, quite frankly, it’s none of my business. If we never see them again, that’s their choice as private citizens and I have to respect that. I’m still fascinated to see how this will all turn out but they are now free to live their own lives and, because of that, I’m going to live and let live.