#because colin just wants to live his life

[gottagobackintime]

I've seen some people say: “Trent shouldn’t have been gay, he should have just supported Colin anyway.” And it's such a weird (and bad) take.

Had Trent been straight we wouldn’t have gotten the scenes we did. Colin could have opened up and told Trent how he felt, but Trent wouldn’t have understood, he could have been supportive. But he wouldn’t understand where Colin is coming from. But because Trent is also gay he knows what it’s like being in the closet, living with fear and dread. Living with thoughts like “if I tell the people I love about my sexuality, will they hate me?”. You can’t get that from a straight ally, no matter how supportive and well meaning they are. Because they don't know what it's like. We need straight allies, we need all the straight allies we can get. But what Colin needs RIGHT NOW is someone who, while not a professional athlete, is involved in the world of football. Knows about homophobic fans, knows that there are a culture of toxic masculinity and homophobia in the clubs. That is why it’s important that Trent himself is gay.

Colin almost got runover by a cyclist in his desperate attempt to run away from Trent at the gay bar. But the relief when he understands what Trent is saying "I must have a good reason for that, mustn't I?" is so clear. Trent is also queer, Trent is safe, I can let Trent in.

And I think some people might read that line as "I haven't outed you because I'm gay too, but if I had been straight I would have" which isn't what Trent means, Trent is using that phrase to be subtle, to let Colin come to his own conclusion, because Colin is stressed out, he's scared. By letting Colin think for himself it gives Colin an opportunity to calm down (which is also why Trent holds his hands out as if calming a frightened animal, he also makes himself slightly smaller by bending his knees and leaning forward slightly). And he does, he realises what Trent is saying and he calms down. It's also an added layer of security it's not just, "I haven't outed you" it's "I haven't outed you because I am also queer". A straight person saying that they haven't outed you doesn't hold as much weight as a queer person saying it. Because you know that the queer person knows how important it is to be safe and to come out on your own terms wheras a straight person, especially an eager well meaning ally might try and encourage you to come out because "hey, it's gonna be fine", even when that's not the support you need at the moment (there are ofc exceptions, both when it comes to straight people and queer people).

But because Trent is also gay, Colin now has someone in his corner at work, who knows him, knows his secret. Who also carried that secret himself once. We’ll most likely get straight allies in the other players and the leaders at Richmond.

So no, Trent shouldn’t have been straight. Because that is not the support Colin needed at that moment. He needed queer solidarity.

[dollypopup]

hm. idk, maybe the reason Luke Newton isn't announcing new projects or posting any Bridgerton content is because some of you demons treated him like hot trash instead of a creative that you wanted more work from and he decided fuck it, this isn't worth the stress. you know, like a lot of creatives who get mistreated do?

like this is a man who went from couch surfing in a friend's house and bartending to make ends meet, deciding that the Bridgerton audition was the last one he'd do before he quit, to suddenly being recognized on the street because that last audition propelled him to star in a global show where fans who have zero media comprehension blamed him for his character's actions and literally stalked him at any hotel he happens to stay at. he went from being a dude doing musical theatre and shopping at thrift stores and recording random songs with friends and posting silly memes on Twitter to being harassed on his only social media page and his friends insulted and his partners bullied by his supposed 'fans' and anything he posts being so microanalyzed that he can't do a damn thing without someone coming out the woodwork screaming about how he's the WORST and won't he think of the FANS!?

like damn he can't have a girlfriend without being harassed, he can't travel without being harassed, he can't like or not like social media posts without being harassed, he can't post a fucking MEME without being harassed, he can't take a vacation or cut his hair or hold someone's hand or just live his life without being blamed for some bullshit or another. but yeah, okay, 'when will Luke Newton come back?' as if it isn't your fault he's AWOL now

[ladyofthelake]

Just got cameos from basically everyone in my fave band The Struts and just received the lead singer Luke (its like 4am hfsfbshdfbs) AND HE WAS SO SWEET AND GRACIOUS AND IM SO

[becky5203]

“Colin didn’t suffer enough.” Yes, he did.

He suffered in season 1 when his family mocked and belittled him for being so open to love and the woman he gave his heart to lied to and manipulated him because of it. He suffered in season 2 when he tried to distract himself and find out who he was in his time of heartbreak and no one in his family cared that he had returned or wanted to hear about his adventures and thought of him as annoying or a bore for talking about them. He suffered in between seasons 2 and 3 when no one in his family answered his letters and the only person who truly cared about and appreciated him just for who he was had seemingly grown tired of him as well. He suffered when he abandoned the person he was and took on a new persona to fit in with the rest of the ton and have people finally take him seriously. He suffered when he realized that he hurt the one person who truly understood him and would do anything to make it up to her. He suffered after his best friend kissed him and changed his life along with the axis on which the earth moved and he thought it meant nothing to her. He suffered when he finally realized that what he had been searching for was right in front of him all along only to realize that he had become the architect of his own nightmare and might lose her to someone else because of the very same advice he gave her. He suffered when he couldn’t live up to his father’s memory and find the courage to ask the love of his life if his feelings were reciprocated. He suffered when he thought she would marry a man who didn’t truly love or appreciate her like she deserved. And when he finally got the chance to tell the woman he loved how he felt he refused to suffer anymore. He finally accepted who he was and what he needed and literally chased after what he wanted more than anything in this world just for the chance to make his true feelings known.

[inthelittlewood]

im here to provide you with things you have said before

"honestly at this point, how can we describe who owns a horse"

"what is comfort? i'm not entirely sure i know what comfort is"

"you're coming in, and this is exactly what you think it is. i'm making myself as a maid, as a rat. no explanations."

"you don't become a donut and live. i just have to point that out. that doesn't happen."

"even after a world shaking, life threatening situation, i still end up with TWO HERONS ON MY BOAT"

"that was weird, stood on food and ate it. pirate martyn canonically chews through his toes"

"i'm not a jerk after all, i'm just a beta tester"

"cherri's definitely the kind who would just tie me up to a electrified chain fence, let's be honest"

"i like the ass song because it says ass and ass is funny"

"i've got ptfd, post traumatic farm disorder"

"any child left in the small intestine has to stay there"

"those're some big boots to fill, but don't you worry, i've got half a thousand rats to put in em"

"you ever thought to yourself: "man, i'm really hungry for a lilypad right now." i have."

"that's a kaleidoscope of colins, it's a coleidoscope"

enjoy the knowledge that these things have come out of your mouth at some point

Who let's me just livestream whenever I want? It seems very unwise

[natti-ice]

Can I PLEASE have some Colin bridgerton smut? My man deserves it he's so overlooked by Anthony and Benedict that no one barely writes for him and it makes me sadd :(

Imagine you and Colin are on travel(or a honeymoon even) and he just ruins you on a balcony ofc you scold him for it but it's not like he would listen to you

Pairing: Colin Bridegerton x fem!reader

Warnings: 18+mdni, groping, teasing, clit play, semi public sex, p in v, creampie. (1.3k words)

Reblogs and comments are greatly appreciated<3

⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡

You're standing outside on the small terrace right outside your bedroom of the chateau you've been staying at for the past few days, the warm summer air blows gently across your skin as you watch the sun set in the distance. Your week has been quite hectic with all the traveling you and your now husband Colin have been doing, he always promised you that once you were wed he would show you the world and he's done very well at keeping his word. The day after your wedding the two of you set off into adventure, stopping off in many cities in England before working your way through Europe.

You were amazed at just how grand everything was outside of your city, you had grown so accustomed to the high social life you were brought up in, it never crossed your mind that others did not live the way you did, and when you found out, it was life changing. In such a short amount of time you had learned so much from the people you and Colin came across, he's quite the tour guide, he shows you to all of the best places for food and always seems to find the most unique forms of entertainment. You were so grateful to have such a special husband, most of the other suitors were bland and didn't care for culture but Colin was different, he had a thirst for exploration and he wanted you to come along.

Though he loved to travel around and see the sights, he also loved to spend time with you. More importantly, time alone... that man hasn't been able to keep his hands to himself since you both said "I do", his hands mindlessly wander around your body at any given moment, the feeling of his rough callused hands sent a rush through your body and he knew exactly what you were feeling. It was almost if he got off on making you shiver, seeing you try to pretend you don't feel anything when his fingers graze the back of your neck while talking to some local about the price of fish in his small town really gets him going.

You were lost in thought and didn't hear the footsteps creeping up behind you until suddenly long, toned, muscular arms wrapped around your frame causing you to jump. You hear his soft chuckle and immediately realize it was your husband, "my apologies dear, I didn't mean to startle you" your heart was already racing because of his sneak up but it pounded a little harder when his hands started to caress your sides so lovingly.

You let out a soft chuckle and lean against his chest "it's alright my love, my mind was in another word" you say, then you feel his hands starting to make their way up to your chest, his large calloused hands cup your breasts through the thin fabric of the nightie that clung to your body. A gasp gets caught in your throat as you feel yourself becoming more aroused, "Colin, we mustn't do this out here, the staff will see."

Colin's warm breath fanned on the nape of your neck leaving goosebumps in its wake as he whispers "we'll give them a good show, lord knows this place lacks entertainment." Despite your protests he continues to indulge in your body, you look over the balcony to see maids hanging up laundry to dry in the distance, surely if the looked up they could see you but in this moment you stopped caring. Your love and lust for Colin was much too strong to fight.

He moved one hand slowly down your front and lifted the hem of your dress to expose your undergarments that were now damp with your arousal, Colin runs his middle and ring fingers teasingly over your clothed slit sending a shiver down your spine. "Mmm, you're already so wet for me. Just how I like you." His dirty words make you feel like the only woman in the world, the pleasure he gives you is unlike anything you have ever experienced and you know you'll never find anything that will compare. His fingers found their way into your panties and he begun teasing your swollen clit with the pads of his fingers, you fought back moans, you didn't want him to know the effects he had on you but he was already well versed in your pleasure.

The hand that was still on your breast made its way you your neck, he held it gently but firm enough that you knew you weren't going anywhere.

"Tell me what you want, dear. Tell me what you crave." He whispers huskily into your ear, his desire for you strong in each of his words. His fingers slowly circled around your entrance, giving you a teasing taste of what's to come if you just ask.

"You," you let out breathlessly, "I want you." He hums as he is delighted by your response and pulls his hand from your clit making you whimper softly with need, he takes his hand off of your throat to quickly pull down his sleeping pants. You feel his hardened cock against your ass as he pulls up the fabric of your nightgown, his fingers hook into the waistband of your underwear and pull them down to your ankles. He spreads your legs with his knee and pushes your back forward slowly, your chest presses against the cool metal of the railing in front of you. He takes your hands and makes you grip the rail as he teasingly says "you might want to hold on, dear."

He lines himself up behind you and slowly runs his tip between your folds before pushing his length into your dripping pussy, your body shakes slightly as your senses are taken over by pleasure. He starts slow, rocking his hips against yours as he holds onto your waist firmly to keep you in place, his cock stretches you out deliciously making you moan softly. Your sounds encourage him to go harder, it's taking everything in him to not completely ruin you right now, he wants to prolong the experience to make sure you feel everything. Once he sets a good pace, that's when he starts to have fun with you. He snakes one hand under your bunched up dress and palms your bare tit, he groans into your ear as he pinches your hard nipple, "you feel so fucking good, fit so perfectly around my cock." You can't fight it anymore, you let your moans fly freely for the world to hear, you'll probably regret it later but you don't care right now.

You were certain everyone in the whole estate knew exactly what was taking place, your loud moans bounced off the walls as you came all over his cock, Colin was in complete ecstasy and couldn't care less about any onlookers. Let them watch. Let them see who owns you.

A few more pumps into your tight channel was all it took to send Colin over the edge, he groaned loudly as his hips bucked against you whilst his seed flooded your womb. He panted heavily as he slowly pulled out of you, both of your fluids covered his length in a beautifully raunchy mess. You slowly stood up straight and turned around to face him, the smile on his face matched yours as you both began to giggle softly. You feel so relaxed but you were still a bit embarrassed about allowing him to take you so publicly. "Colin Bridgerton, you are a very scandalous man" you say teasingly and lightly hit his left peck, he laughs heartily at your comment and takes your hand,  bringing it to his mouth and placing a soft, loving kiss to it. "My apologies, dear. You are too irresistible, I cannot contain my desire for you." He says with a smile and helps you straighten out your clothing before leading you back into your bedroom where he will most likely repeat the events that just transpired.

⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡ ⟡

Tag list: @let-love-bleeds-red @lovelyy-moonlight @themadhattersqueen @artzygurl

Join a tag list!

[nostalgicmiscellaneous]

If we think about it, Colin was quite brave for confessing his feelings to Penelope. When she asked him to kiss her, she said it wouldn't mean anything, he wouldn't need to worry because she wouldn't want nor expect anything from him. But it meant everything to Colin, it was a confirmation that yes, he already 'felt something' and that just unleashed all of his desires for her, it meant everything to him. However, when they talk about it at that wonderful willow tree scene, and he's there, all hopes and nerves, wondering if it was as magical for her as it was for him, she shuts him down. Hard. She apologizes for asking, which shows him she regrets it, and she states that they will never do that again. In fact, she says, it'd be even better if they kept a certain distance. That's rejection and Colin has issues with self-worth. We all know that Colin is oblivious to Pen's feelings, so he's operating on hope and maybe, just maybe that their bond means something, since she cares about his friendship. That's why he seeks out his mother's words and reassurance. He knows he feels the way he feels about Pen, but even if she doesn't, his mother tells him that friendship can become love. We tend to think that this is Colin trying to make sense of his feelings, and perhaps a bit it is, but i take that as him also grasping at the hope that she can learn how to love him because they have friendship. Thus, with that boost from his mother's words, the encouragement he needs, he goes after her...but looking at her eyes, he freezes, because he's not sure if that will make him actually lose everything, even her friendship, and it's all he has now. The rejection is fresh on his mind, she doesn't want him that way, he thinks. She said she wouldn't want to repeat their kiss, that i was a mistake. And Lord Debling shows up, a titled Lord ( and here we can think again about Colin's own insecurities about his life and purposes, his occupation) with confidence and she seems to enjoy him, he seems to be all she was hoping for and she told him she enjoys his character and his looks. He's unable to say it. He's too scared to say it. Yes, we all know Colin is oblivious to Penelope's feelings. He doesn't know. People sometimes forgets how he only ever hears Pen say she loves him back on episode 6. Before, he was pouring his heart out and telling her how much he loves, desires and admires her, so when Colin decided to risk it all, it's so brave of him, it's a willing vulnerability that it's honestly the most beautiful of this show. When Colin goes after her, tells her how he feels, afraid of rejection, of losing her even as a friend, he battles his own self issues, his deep insecurity, without any certain she loves him back. And that's so beautiful. That's true romance, true love right there. Because it had to be said, he couldn't live with the thought he didn't try, with her with someone else without trying, he had to give his heart to her even if it meant she would destroy it, if she refused. So, everytime you watch the show now, remember that Colin Bridgerton was the bravest. When he feared the most, when he had the most to lose and risk it, he truly gathered the courage to ask. For Penelope, he tried. He did it and it's thanks to that they started to live the love of their lives.

[neutron-stars-collision]

It's incredible how much everything changes when you rewatch p1, after seeing the whole thing at least twice. Especially episodes 1-2. The context of Colin's feelings, his confounding feelings, makes everything even better.

Because imagine this: he's on the tour of the continent, living the life, only no one responds to his letter or seems interested in his whereabouts. And if it were only the family? He'd probably be fine. Salty, but fine. Except it's Pen, his dearest friend who doesn't respond to his letter. Not once.

So, Colin spirals, decides to change his personality, become the man he thinks society expects him to be, starts documenting things in his journal where usually he'd write about them to Pen. Perhaps with time he stops writing letters to her completely, but he still misses her so much.

He comes back, a changed man, everyone's attention on him and his newly acquired swagger. Debutantes swoon over him and his new look. It's everything he wanted, except... Pen gives him the cold shoulder. Twice. Doesn't seem at all interested in his new persona. The flirting, which he has tried out on many unimportant women in the Ton doesn't work on the one woman who actually matters. He's confused and lost.

Once he realises what he has done to garner Penelope's anger, he instantly makes amends. Sheds the newly acquired armour to tell her just how much she means to him. Or at least as much as he's allowing himself to notice by that point. The confusion is still there, and it gets worse after the handshake because you cannot tell me he didn't feel a spark right then? He definitely did. And it was bewildering.

But, still, being the oblivious man he is, Colin pushes on with the mad and spontaneous plan to help Pen find a husband. Mostly because it gives him a chance to spend time with her. And suddenly this is all he wants to do. The only thing that provides genuine joy. Only in those brief moments with her he can be himself. He can be accepted.

And episode 2 showcases all of that perfectly. It shows Colin in a permanent state of confusion because not only are those moments with Penelope the only times he feels like his old self, but also now there's more. The constant desire to be alone with her, to trample over any left rules of propriety to steal just a moment of her attention. To help her because this is the only thing he's good at. To be useful. Then jealousy begins to brew because he has to watch Pen be her charming self with men that are not him. Slowly he begins to realise that perhaps he wants more than to be her friend. That perhaps she's never been just a friend.

By the time Pen asks for that kiss, Colin is terrified because he wants to kiss her. He wants to kiss her while knowing that it will mean something. It will mean something to him. Because Pen is home. Pen is everything he was looking for. And now that he has realised it there is no chance he can forget. The kiss only signs off that which was inevitable.

[rose-edith]

Being a plus size Bridgerton sister would include:

•All your life you’d felt like an imposter, bigger than your sisters- sturdier- curvier. You felt less than, despite being physically more than. And you felt that no one ever really understood that.

•Your mother and Lady Danbury saw no flaws in you, thought you were absolutely beautiful, and kind and clever- but they believed you were simply crippling shy. So naturally, they went out of their way to help ‘bring you out of your shell’. Which yes, was as utterly hellish as it sounds! It meant rounds of introductions to eligible men, being pushed to the centre stage at all family functions, dressed in more jewels than anyone else. They really wanted to make you sparkle, because to them, you were already a diamond. You had been the apple of your Father’s eye before his death, and everytime Violet looked at you, it was Edmund she could see.

•as for the Queen? You may well not exist. She wasn’t even the slightest bit perplexed or excited by you. Which suited you fine!

•Anthony is SO protective of you, and following his marriage to Kate, she becomes protective of you too. Kate and Anthony stare at any members of the ton who even dream of thinking anything unkind.

•On his travels, Colin makes sure to collect for you the most beautiful jewellery or paintings or fabrics. Colin is tender with all his siblings, but he’s the one who listens to you most when you’re upset- he’s the one who sees it, and does his best to support you and build your confidence. Whether it’s fashionable or not to dance with your own sister, Colin will always take you for at least one turn about the floor; he can’t bare for you to be overlooked or be left ‘on the shelf’.

•Benedict is also your number one fan, at balls and social events he’ll often help you to escape- whether he takes you for a turn about the room, to get a drink, or to help you leave early if you’re just not feeling it.

•Growing up, you couldn’t help but be envious of Daphne, of her looks, her success on the marriage mart, her beautiful life with Simon. But as you grew, she showed you that real beauty comes from within anyway. Simon loves you too, finding you to be amusing, clever and witty. As for their children- well, you’re their favourite Aunt!

•Eloise was aloof as ever, she understood rationally and practically why you were somewhat on the outskirts of society. But she enjoyed not being the only one on the outside looking in; and sometimes when she needed an out you would cause a diversion, and vice versa; Eloise was an ally!

•and hand in hand with Eloise came a friendship with Penelope. You realised almost immediately that Pen was Lady Whistledown, but you never told a soul. Not Pen, not Eloise, not anyone. You were proud of Pen for using the harsh reality of a lonely life to create something meaningful; to carve her own career. Penelope was your friend, though she was Eloise’s best friend. She was at your side when Cressida cut across your heart with her barbs and remarks, and when Cressida “accidentally” cut Penelope up, spilt her drink or split her dress, you would retaliate in kind- most notably resulting in her perfectly smoothed down hair getting dislodged when she “tripped” over your out-stretched foot at the drinks table. ‘Poor Cressida!’ You had cried with devilish delight. ‘What an awful spectacle to befall you!’ The music stopped and everyone turned to look as the mighty Cressida crumbled. What an elated victory indeed.

•Francesca was in and out of your lives, going to Bath and escaping the misery of a lonely life in London. But she would send you music; and suddenly the world wasn’t so blue.

•Your favourite people of all to be around though? Hyacinth and Gregory. They were young, brains like sponges ready to learn and laugh and they love you without reservation. You spend afternoons drilling them with dances, playing archery, games, stealing cakes from the kitchens.

•but like all your family, there’s only one thing you ever wanted really: to find love. You just weren’t foolish enough to believe you’d find it yet, but maybe, just maybe, you’d be surprised when love fell directly into your lap.

[lukolabrainrot]

London Thoughts and The Events Since

Alright, y'all have been requesting it, so here we go...

First, let's take a step into a little story shall we:

26 y/o boy living on his friend's couch trying to make it as an on-screen actor (but a sweet theater nerd at heart). Starts a new relationship with someone also into theater. It's homey and nice and going well. Boy is about to give up on breaking out of theater when BOOM now introducing Colin Bridgerton. Boy meets girl playing his romantic counterpart in the show and BOOM what is all this warmth he feels for her. Boy is in awe and just mesmerized by this girl. The boy loves this girl. But wait, the boy is a little bit younger than the girl, and the boy has a girlfriend. The boy wants to make things work with his girlfriend. He loves her. So the boy pushes those feelings down and becomes good friends with the girl, but they flirt with each other constantly, and others start picking up on an energy between them. The boy's girlfriend also starts picking up on the energy between her boyfriend and the girl. She knows what her boyfriend looks like when he is in love. The boy and the girl are going to finally be the leads in the show. It is a very exciting time, and the boy and girl get a lot closer. Things with the boy and his girlfriend start to sour for various reasons, and the girlfriend starts to get a little insecure and jealous of the girl. The boy tries to distance himself from the girl, but then has to redirect all his attention on the girl when they start filming their season. This is the breaking point with the boy and his girlfriend, and they part ways. The boy and the girl channel all of their pent up sexual chemistry and feelings into their characters, and they are having an amazing time. The dials on the flirting turn to 11, and they start toying with the idea of acting on their feelings in private. Eventually, they do. Their season wraps up, and they are having a great time with each other in private. Things are going well for a while, and they are playing sneaky little SM games with the fans to tease that they might be a little more than friends. However, the girl is pretty jaded about love, and has not prioritized that part of her life in a long time. The girl also really likes the boy, and doesn't want to mess anything up between them. The boy is ALL IN though, and wants something more than casual. The girl puts the breaks on the relationship, but there are a lot of deep feelings for each other that both of them have still not shared. The boy then goes on a HBS and casually dates people who seem totally different from the girl because the boy is a little heartbroken, and does not want to be reminded of the girl. The boy is also not emotionally available, because the boy and the girl never established firm boundaries on what their relationship will be moving forward. Eventually, the boy meets someone that he has fun with, and she gets along with his friends. However, the boy and the girl come back together to finish filming for their season, and ALL of the feelings come flooding back. But the boy is again (kind of) in a relationship, but BOOM the boy and the girl then have to spend the next 6 months promoting their season all over the world with all of these unresolved feelings...

Alright, I have to say, I had a lot of fun writing that 😂 Soooo, these are my theories on where L/N were at when the PR tour started in January. And then I already talked about my theories on what happened between them on the PR tour. Which leads us to London...

London

I will say this, I personally didn't observe any MAJOR changes in the nonverbal cues in how L/N were interacting with each other in London. Also, which was particularly telling to me, N still had the total heart eyes for L (you can tell because L has this habit of losing track of what he is saying when she is looking at him like that, which he did at least twice from what I remember during the various interviews they did in London). She also just had this happy glow about her like she was really at ease and content (which I also thought was interesting because they both must have been SOO tired by this point 🤔). HOWEVER, I did notice that L seemed a little more anxious than normal, and started using more distancing language and just in general seemed way less on-board with the shipping around L/N. And by the London red carpet, I realized something big was going on internally for L based on the body language and behavior. SOME of that I think is because red carpet events are just challenging for him in general (might have something to do with his anxiety and ADHD). I also think though that there was a lot more going on BTS during this period than we were privy to at the time. Here are my thoughts on what was going on during London (based off everything we know now):

Let's first remember the goldmine that was Ireland (which was JUST a few days prior). And I choose to believe N that L/N stayed the weekend with her family (which is still WILD to me that she admitted that on a public interview, because people are obviously going to read into that 🙃). And also WHYYY would she lie about that, when it's such a personal thing and had nothing to do with the show. I mean yes, maybeee she was lying, but it just doesn't really make sense to me that she would lie about THAT.

I started noticing near the last leg of the tour (by Toronto), N started to be a LOT more obvious about her feelings for L, and was making some pretty big slip-ups (and personally I observed that it seemed L was the one who was noticing and trying to correct for that and not let the WHOLE cat out of the bag). Now why was N being so obvious? SHE WAS REALLY HAPPY WITH HIM. And I think this is a lot newer for N because she has been so jaded about love and romance for such a long time. Even though I firmly believe L fell first, I think this was a lot more of a big deal for N because she hasn't had something like this in a long time (imo). So she was just really excited and giddy and having a hard time hiding it.

I think L/N had some conversations while they were in Ireland about how they were going to handle their public narrative moving forward, because like I mentioned in my A theories here, L was always going to have to start publicly distancing himself from N (REGARDLESS of what was actually going on with L/N BTS). And personally, I think that started by the promo in London, which I think was kind of jarring for the public that was following along considering L/N's behavior just a few days before in Ireland.

Therefore, I think a lot of this change in body language and responses from L was coming from the feelings he was having around this, as well as knowing that soon he would have to go public with A. I'm sure this was incredibly stressful, and as we know, L is not very subtle or good at lying/hiding his true feelings. However, I don't think this shift in L was coming from any type of shift in feelings between L/N. I think by London, L had become super self-conscious and in his head about everything, and I think he was just ready to be done with the promo because it was giving him a lot of anxiety. I think a lot of those feelings though were coming from wanting to protect NICOLA. I think L/N had a plan on how they were going to handle distancing in their public narrative after the London premiere, BUT I personally believe A hijacked that narrative...

To Papgate and Beyond

So, I think we all know the events of everything that has happened since the London premiere between L/N/A, and I still stand by my thoughts on the situation here. This is what I will add (again, these are just theories though based on the information we have now and what I have observed):

I am fairly certain that A was responsible for tipping the paps off for the hotel pics because she was upset and trying to reclaim some control on the situation. It was obvious that DM's objective was to sell a certain narrative, and they weren't really able to get that because I don't think L had any plan to publicly acknowledge her that night (mainly based on the damage control he had to do right after, and how L/N were interacting on SM following the event). The only person who benefited from those pics was A, and all the roads lead back to her being involved with DM in some type of way if you look at all the information we have now. Now was L's team involved with the first set of pap pics after the after party? Maybe, I just don't have enough information to say yes or no. I could see though that this may have been planned in advance on his side to start to publicly distance/seperate himself some form N. However, I don't really have any information to prove that, more just a feeling.

I think part of the understanding that L came to with A after Brazil was allowing her to get attention by publicly linking herself to him, regardless of the negative impact it may have on his career in the short-run. I think the reason it seems like he is just passively letting things happen around him related to SM and the press is because HE IS. After Papgate 2.0 and all the information that came out around that, it became clear to me that A has a larger goal to get her name out there THROUGH HIM, regardless of how it makes him look. And I think there is an understanding between L/A that he's just not going to ask questions and let her do what she wants and let the cards fall where they may for right now.

Now you might say, that doesn't make a lot of sense, why would he do that, it seems like kind of a poor choice career wise? Yes, I agree, this was not a great career move (and I think he underestimated HOW MUCH of an impact this was going to have). However, like I have said, it is my belief that L decided he was going to take the bullet for what (MAY) have occurred between him and N on the tour because he's trying to protect NICOLA's public image. I think he had a different plan though on how he was going to introduce A to the public, but once A hijacked that, I think he was kind of just stuck in a situation where he had to let A do what she wants because again, HE DOESN'T WANT A TO LEAK INFORMATION ABOUT HIM AND N.

If ANY of my theories around A that I have mentioned so far are true (and I am almost certain that SOME of them are), there is NO way L/A are doing great on an emotional level. Which is why the public optics around them have looked so strange starting from when she was publicly introduced at Papgate. I think it is also PARTICULARLY telling that even though the cat is out of the bag regarding A, his team will still not publicly confirm she is his girlfriend. Personally, I think that is intentional because it makes it easier to untangle himself more quietly from her in like 3-4 months (which I think is the plan). I could be wrong though of course, but something in my gut, based on everything I have seen, tells me that they aren't all happy and boo'd up like A the press wants us to think. There are just too many weird and shady things going on BTS.

Lastly, I think it was ALWAYS the plan for L/N to publicly disconnect after the London premiere. However, that doesn't really have anything to do with their private relationship. We only see a small sliver of their lives, and we have no way of knowing the full story BTS because we don't know them. I also think a lot of people are struggling with the fact that there was SO MUCH content of them for MONTHS, and now we have been cut off cold turkey. I don't personally find though the lack of content or SM interactions with each other currently as a direct indicator of the status of their relationship (ex: I don't think it's a direct indicator that they have ill feelings towards each other). Let's assume my theory is correct that the PR tour forced the two of them to address some deep feelings for each other that they had been having for a while, and those feelings were reciprocated. And then this newfound evolution in their relationship played out on a very public stage while L was publicly connected to someone else. That is a lot of pressure and incredibly stressful. I could not even imagine. Therefore, I think L/N are navigating some complicated things in private, but I don't think that it negates the positive emotional shift they had during the tour. I think they need to take this time out of the public eye to explore these complex, newfound feelings and developments in their relationship. I still don't think though that we would have seen what we did between L/N during the tour by Toronto if they weren't on the same page about seriously exploring their romantic feelings at some point in the near future. But those are just my thoughts...

Anywhooo, that concludes my L/N timeline theories 😊 Thanks for coming to my TedTalk! 😂

[anders-hawke]

a lot of the frustration with part 2 seems to be coming from the fact that people are unwilling to view it as only a part of a whole story. Colin's sensitivity and self-worth issues didn't magically disappear once he admitted his feelings to Pen in the carriage. being with Pen is a dream come true and he's holding her up on this pedestal just as Pen had Colin on a pedestal until the end of season 2. finding out that she's Whistledown knocked her off that pedestal and allowed him to have the necessary character growth to realize that his worth as a person is not dependent on other people. he literally tells Pen that he thought he was the problem when really she has been the problem. and he is so blinded by his heartbreak that he can't understand that Pen being Whistledown is not her "true self" and the Pen he fell in love with and slept with and could be having a child with is not her "fake self" but that they are two halves of her whole self. he's put his entire being into this relationship in the hopes that taking care of Pen and ensuring her safety and happiness and impressing her and all of these unnecessary things would prove to be his purpose. and then he feels that all the things he's just committed himself to have been for a lie.

but Colin's anger isn't a stagnant thing, it evolves throughout the episodes. they argue outside Genevieve's and Colin learns that their relationship is not a lie. Pen loves him. she knows him better than anyone else. he still can't accept that Whistledown is part of her but he is assured that their love is real and that is why he's willing to have sex with her in that scene. because his need to be assured of her feelings has been fulfilled. people mistakenly think of that scene has being angry sex but it's not. Colin is not a man who fucks his way through his feelings. when he was having meaningless sex, that was pushing his feelings away, but he is not willing to do that with Pen. and he is also not willing to have sex with her when he is so conflicted over his role within their marriage. their wedding goes so well because Colin has been assured of Pen's love for him, so even though he's frustrated with her still, he sets that aside as he did the night before to just love her. and she hasn't been writing Whistledown so he feels that he can set it aside for now, and they can enter this marriage and he can convince her to leave the column behind. but then Pen tells him that she is not ashamed that Whistledown is part of her and he says he can't accept that and then, once again, he's unsure how to process his role in their relationship.

and because of that insecurity in his sense of self, he is not willing to have sex with her. he wants to, and he wants to kiss her, and love her, and laugh with her, etc. but he doesn't let himself do any of that because though giving in sounds nice, he is terrified of having no purpose in life, and he isn't willing to be with Pen unless he knows what his purpose is. and then he realizes that he's truly losing her, and he rereads her letters to realize that he always knew the whole of her, and she tells him again that he doesn't need to do anything to be worthy of love, and he realizes that even if his only purpose is simply to love Pen, then that is a fulfilling life to live. (it's not his only purpose, but that's besides the point.) just loving each other for who they are is enough.

[dollypopup]

I truly cannot overstate just how much I adore Colin Bridgerton as a male love lead, and how important his story is, in particular in a current, modern reading. We live in a time of alpha male machismo that in many ways mirrors the sexism of the historical time period Colin is in, and we have a hero who explicitly rejects it. More than that, we have a hero who first tries on the persona, first tries to fit in, and then determines, with no outside influence and all on his own, that it's wrong. That he doesn't want to be like the men of his society, that he doesn't like the expectation of sex without love and commitment and connection, that he doesn't want to be 'one of the boys', even if it comes at their derision.

Because when Violet says he has always been her most sensitive child, when he has always considered others before himself, when he has always offered a joke or a moment of levity- for so long, he felt he had to. That there was no other choice.

Colin Bridgerton, The Great Pretender, is finally coming into the light.

Take my hand. Come walk with me.

Colin's arc is incredibly clear, and incredibly dear to me. We can track his progress throughout the seasons he has been in, but if we consider his backstory, it comes even more in clarity.

Piecing together a timeline with some influence from the books and loose historical accuracy, Colin loses his father at 12 and then is sent off to Eton. And he is a tiny thing when his father passes, shorter even than his 9 year old sister, Eloise.

(Yes, I checked!! He's half a head shorter than Eloise, and an entire head shorter than Daphne. This boy is SMALL)

So it makes a lot of sense to me that this is the start of his fake-it-to-make-it personality. He cannot grieve with his family in these circumstances, he's been sent off to school with other boys who are bigger and stronger than him, and he must realize relatively quickly that weakness in their eyes will never be tolerated. In fact, Eton was well known for corporal punishment and bullying during this time. Older boys were well known to mistreat the younger once, and considering just how small and soft-hearted Colin is, and just how vulnerable he is having lost his father-

Of course Colin would become a target of such.

And despite that, we meet him in Season 1 with an endearing earnestness and hopefulness in the world. Something inside him, something sweet and gentle and warm, thrives to live. And fights against grief to do so. How easy it would have been for him to lose his father and be bitter. How easy for him to see his father die from the steps of Aubrey Hall, to be sent to a boarding school away, and withdraw in on himself.

And yet, he doesn't.

At least, not in the way one would suspect. Instead, Colin becomes a chronic people pleaser. If the people around him are happy, then he will be safe. Will not be hurt. And they have no space for his own hurt, regardless. There's hardly even any space for his mirth, as most people didn't even reply to his letters on his travels the previous season.

In Colin's confession in Season 3, he says 'I have spent so long trying to feel less', and this numbing begins early in his life. He's a consummate gentleman in Season 1. He does everything by the book, everything as he should. He wants to be accepted in his society, wants to be taken seriously, wants to belong. So he sees a pretty woman, and he gets along with her well enough, and he courts her. Openly, honestly, in full view. It isn't a heart-stopping love, but he has numbed himself for years at this point, so affection will do, and if proper men of his society are married, well, maybe he'd finally be taken seriously.

And yet, no one notices him, even still. No one except Penelope. His own mother doesn't recognize his behavior, and worries for him after she does. How long has it been since she's actually seen him? We know from the show that he's incredibly close to his mother, and loves her dearly, but we also know that after Edmund's passing, Violet was mired in grief and post-partum depression. Colin misses much of this as a firsthand witness since he's at school, but that doesn't mean he wouldn't be able to tell, wouldn't be affected by losing his mother and father in one fell swoop. In fact, Colin loses his connection to the majority of his family in being sent to school so soon after the tragedy. So of course he comes back and he tries not to make waves. Tries to do things correctly.

His friction with Anthony proves time and time again that nothing he does is entirely ever able to fully please him, and this causes contention in their brotherly bond. Of all the siblings, Anthony is arguably the most harsh with Colin. And he is also the model for who a man should be in the family, as the head of the family.

So when Anthony sees Colin earnestly try to marry, he scoffs him off. Accuses Colin of only wanting to marry to have sex, and then claiming "It is my fault. I should have taken you to brothels." This is the first on-screen shaming of Colin looking for connection before sex, and Colin doubles down. He wants to marry for love.

But he doesn't actually love Marina. Neither of them truly know each other, and so when it all blows up, and he is humiliated to the entirety of his community, Colin gets his first taste of romantic failure. He tried to do it right, and it ended more wrong than he could have ever imagined. So, maybe Anthony was right. Maybe he is just a foolish, green boy, who has no idea how to go about things. The fallout of his failed engagement echoes in the persona he puts on in Season 3, and the choices he undergoes during them. Is it any wonder he ends up going to brothels to have unfulfilling sex if even his own BROTHER, the head of his family, tells him to do so?

It doesn't happen right away, though. Despite the fact that no one truly checks on him or sees how this breakup effects him (Eloise dismisses the hurt he must feel in light of such events with an honestly rather accurate wave-away "Men are always less affected", and that is true), it is evident that he is NOT okay.

We leave Colin in Season 1 putting on a mask, a happy face to his family, a 'you inspired me' to Penelope, and then spends his travels sad. Depressed. Taking drugs to try to ease his mind, occupying himself with writing to Penelope. In Season 2, he spends the entirety of it trying to be useful. And he does this with Penelope. He feels deeply for her, he cares so much for her, and he even says it to her aloud 'You are special to me' and 'I will always look after you' and how he could never give her up. Season 2 is a season of healing for Colin- he closes his chapter with Marina with a relationship post-mortum conversation after he does a wellness check to make sure she's alive (let's be real here, no one else was going to reach out to her. She made it clear to him that even her own father didn't want her), makes amends with Will, proves himself useful to Penelope, and departs on a high: he thinks he threaded the needle. He thinks he was successful sending Jack off, that he made Penelope happy, and that he's in with The Boys.

But whilst the person he is around Penelope is genuine, the person he is around these men are not. We know from Season 3 that they don't actually like him. They make snide, underhanded comments toward him, and laugh at him. I stand by the idea that end of season 2 is Fife and Co. laughing at Penelope AND laughing at Colin. They don't care about their friendship, they're teasing him for caring about her so openly, and Colin is protective of the relationship he has with Penelope. So he makes a comment for the boys, and puts on his mask. 'I would never court Penelope Featherington' (look, I'm just like you. I walk like you, talk like you, speak like you) 'Not in your wildest fantasies, Fife' (I am one of you one of you one of you- so why does it feel so hollow?)

He gets, now, his first taste of acceptance from them. They come to him to Mondrich's bar, he repays his slight against him, and he feels he is one of them. (Does he truly *want* to be one of them?) And so when we open Season 3, it's a smooth progression.

Colin is walking the walk and talking the talk, and yet his heart isn't in it. He's not one of these smarmy men, but he mimics them. Their behavior. In part, at least. Whilst Fife is out preying on 18 year old women in coat closets, Colin is telling gaggles of girls how pretty they are and how with such nice dresses, they're sure to find a husband. He makes it clear he's not an option, but that he doesn't mind being a fantasy. And Luke Newton does an amazing job making that clear: there are three sides of Colin. The Colin portrayed to his society in the light in good company (1) and the Colin portrayed to his society in the dark, in. . .less savory circles (aka: The Lads)(2), his 'armor' as his mum calls it. And finally, the most important but the one kept closest to the chest: the Colin of truth. The Colin who cries alone in his room after a breakup, the Colin who doesn't burden others with his feelings, the Colin who writes to Penelope, the Colin who loves deeply and feels deeply.

But his society has no use for a man like the real Colin, they do not *want* a man like real Colin, so he puts it under lock and key. And so much of this is centered around his feelings about sex, so here comes my 'Colin is Queer' soapbox. Colin does not experience sexual attraction like the rest of the men of the ton. He is expected to find it casual and be cavalier about it. To just want to fuck for the sake of fucking. But Colin needs love and romance and connection to actually enjoy sexual interactions. Nowadays, we recognize this as being on the asexual spectrum, of being demisexual, but he didn't have words for that in the time period he's in, so he has to forge ahead to figure himself out without a community identity to find solidarity with. That's what makes the brothel scenes so interesting as a narrative device: in the first, he's masking even in the midst of it, and in the second, he can't. After kissing Penelope, he finally, for the first time in his life, has a sexual interaction that means something to him.

It's the first one he truly enjoys, and the first one that feels right to him. It clicks for him that oh, that's what it's meant to be like. And the strain of that realization whilst still having to be what his society expects of him puts immense stress on his shoulders. You see how he grows more and more uncomfortable about the conversations, until finally he rejects it outright.

Even when it's very much not encouraged for him to do so. He's even told "You are much more fun this season." That's why he hides himself. From near everyone, even his family, even his brothers. It's telling how Anthony's positive interaction with Colin is when they're at the club, and Anthony praises him for his most recent attention. Have we seen much of Anthony being proud of Colin, otherwise? Not really. So he's reinforced in his persona. Doesn't boast of his travels because it didn't have anyone liking him for it, before. Doesn't even say how many cities he's gone to. Except with Penelope.

In the books, there's a line about their kiss, referencing how his world will never be the same. And it won't be. Because when Colin says that she helps him see the world in new ways, it's in a multitude of meanings.

Penelope refuses to let him wear the mask, because in truth, Penelope is the only one who doesn't like it. Not only does she see the real Colin, but she enjoys the real Colin. Whilst everyone else is simpering over Colin's new look and attitude, rejects who he is in reality, Penelope dismisses it, wants the person she knows him to be instead. It's only when he strips down the facades that Penelope allows him into her life again. And her Whistledown article was harsh, but it was also true. He *is* masking. He *is* putting on a persona and a role. But she was wrong when she asked if Colin even knows which is real: Colin knows very well which is real. And he also knows the realities of him haven't been accepted.

When Colin tells Penelope charm can be taught, he speaks from experience. When he says 'living for the expectations of others is a trap' it is because he has already fallen into it, and if he can't dig himself out, maybe he can keep her from it. Colin tells her 'you do not need lessons' and that she is fine exactly as she is, because just as she sees the real him and loves him, he sees the real her, and loves her, too. But they both live in the constraints of their society, and so they both put on the masquerade. Even sometimes to hide from each other.

The current climax of his arc is when he's out with the lads, after they all go off to the brothel again, and he disassociates from the experience. Playing cards and insisting on sharing sexual exploits, to which he does not want to take part, and makes a lighthearted dig at them. 'There is no gentleman at this table'. He includes himself in that, and then clarifies. He speaks aloud for the first time to them the truth of his heart- 'Do you not ever tire of the expectation to remain cavalier about the one thing in life that holds genuine meaning? Do you not find it lonely?' Can it really only just be him?

And it is. Or, maybe it isn't, but the rest of them aren't brave enough to admit it, so they're okay in making him feel like it is, in outcasting him for being a romantic, for caring about a woman beyond what she can provide for him sexually. Colin professes he doesn't like who he's become, doesn't like the expectations for him to behave the way he has, and they laugh at him. Again. He is made fun of, again.

He goes home and he falls in his bed and he feels like he lost it all. Lost Penelope to his own advice, and lost his newfound shine in his community. But when he's faced with which one matters more to him, he chooses Penelope. Unhesitatingly.

Colin chooses to be sensitive. He chooses to be a warm-hearted, gentle man in a society that prefers sexist machismo. Act one way in the light and another in the shadows. Colin wants to live authentically, as a man he doesn't really have a role model for. He is brave and he is tender, he sees the sexism of his society and he rejects it. He sees the importance Penelope has in his life, the way she makes him feel, and he embraces her wholeheartedly. He wants love and romance, he wants connection and meaning.

Colin, The Great Pretender, sick of pretending. Colin, walking into that ballroom and giving Fife the cut direct when he invites him out. Colin, cutting into a dance in the middle of a ball between Penelope and a man the entire city knows is about to propose. Colin staring deeply into her eyes with such unfiltered longing even *Cressida* can't help but notice what's going on. Colin running off after Penelope in full view of his society, outrunning a *carriage* to see her. Begging her to let him in. Colin on his knees, all but flaying his chest open for Penelope to see his heart. Colin made a choice when that candle flickered out, and his choice was Penelope. His choice was himself. And his choice was to flip off societal expectation and to live for love, damn the consequences.

I think our own world would be a better place if modern men took his example, too. Colin Bridgerton as male love lead in Bridgerton, a global show, is such a refreshing, wonderful example. A man who tried to be like what the world wanted, and who decided to go against the gender norms of his time. A man who prioritizes the woman he loves, who risks ridicule in doing so and comes to realize that he doesn't care. He doesn't care anymore about being one of the boys, one of the lads, one of the guys. Fuck his society if his society can't recognize the beauty of what he feels with Pen. He cares about being the best self he can be. And that best self is around Penelope, inspired by Penelope.

Because how he is with Penelope? God, I could swoon. At every turn, he prioritizes her comfort and personhood. He validates her, he sees her in beautiful, positive light and he helps her see herself that way, too. He encourages her to be brave because he already feels she is, he refuses to let her call herself stupid or a laughingstock, he apologizes without excuses, he checks in on her every step of the way. He's so passionate in that carriage, he's burning for her, he's yearning, but he doesn't do anything until she agrees for him to. He confesses his feelings and when she says they're friends, he backs off. He listens, he cares. He apologizes for overstepping her boundaries, and then when she gives him her consent, the only thing on his mind is showing how much he wants and appreciates her by providing her pleasure. Colin, the people pleaser, dedicated only to pleasing two people in that moment: Penelope, and himself. Because he wants to do that, to give her an orgasm that exists just for her. He's a witness to it, and that's pleasure for him, too. He waits for her nod of consent, he revels in seeing her enjoying herself. And the aftercare- I could cry.

Colin is a man who had every single reason not to be a kind, sensitive soul, and still he chose it. Chose to share it because the headline, even a wallflower can bloom, that's not just for Penelope.

It's for Colin, too.

[vocallywritten]

The only thing I want out of season 4 is to see a Colin that is secure about Penelope’s love. We got a tiny bit in the epilogue but I just want to see him care free and living his best life because he knows his wife loves him.

[vethbrenatto]

This was far and away my favorite episode of The Ravening War so far, and I wanted to figure out why breaking down emotional beats by character. Apologies, this might get long.

Bishop Raphaniel breaks, falling into madness. He sees through the trees of the organization he's been representing with a mindset all along that he was the one who knew something the others didn't, only to realize he had been hoodwinked all along. He looks back on the life he's lived, the things he's done, and the things he's been through/plagued by and turns to the fungi going: It has to have been meant for something, please make it all worth it- don't let this be meaningless.

Lady Amangeaux trades her title and her notoriety in for the safety of her child, accepting that she may not even be much in that life (as she turns her life to service), but knowing that the child will be protected. After the death of Pamela Rocks, the woman who in Episode 1 was so fervently clinging to her title, has finally realized there are far safer things you can be than a queen.

Delissandro Katzon loses Colin and falls desperately into individualism. With his anchor to friendship and community gone, his worst instincts of self kick in. What matters is his name, his legacy, his power. Not that of Basha Myaso, no matter how he may support him. Certainly not that of his mother. While he does swap Colin for Karna, she only encourages these instinct in him, having similar values about the importance of his power.

Karna Solara is offered the opportunity for family and turns it down. She wears armor showing that she has been everywhere, she is from every place... yet her conversation at the start of the episode with Amangeaux betrays that she's been everywhere, yet has no one. She is no daughter; she is and always has been an orphan. Yet her connection to Deli betrays one last spark of humanity (humanity in food? you know what I mean) in the form of a crush that began as a sixteen year-old girl. She may have grown up rotting, but there is some heart in there, for him.

Colin Provolone is finally revealed to be just some guy. He is some guy's son who was some other guy's son and he's been running his whole life because of it. So, when he sees Pamela Rocks killed not for anything she did, but because she is of House Rocks, he can't sit idly by anymore. He trades the most he's ever had in life; a position, a title, a true friend- for his morals. He goes from supporting a person he liked to protecting someone he doesn't for his morals. He gives away a life he could have loved for one he can feel okay living.

Woof, guys. It's a lot.

[polin-erospsyche]

I’d just like to take a moment today before the drop of part 2 to point out a few things about how unserious their bedroom is.

Let’s start with the obvious, there’s a gigantic mirror in front of the bed which has a great view on the bed 👀 like did Colin just place a mirror in every room???

Second the poor settee by the foot of the bed. You will soon join the fate of that lounge chair in the living room. When that day arrives may you rest in peace. Honestly Polin is really that couple who’s going to buy furniture just to be horny and break it.

Lastly, baby girl has been running away from yellow all her life, stating « I never wish to see another citrus colour » and you know what chaotic baby does? Move her out of the Featherington house just to bring her into an apartment full of yellow. Like it wasn’t enough for baby boy to sleep in the same bed as his wife he also needed to bring his emotional comfort YELLOW sheets with him. Like the boy has been surrounded by yellow his whole life and it’s not because he got the girl that he’ll stop now and honestly fair, but also poor Pen.

I can just imagine Colin being so blissfully happy and designing their whole apartment to meet their horny needs and Pen just being on the side « yes my love, yes whatever you want, yes let’s bring in yellow » 🙂‍↕️

I swear it will never get old but Colin Bridgerton is the most down bad, unserious man of the ton

[somedayillbepeterpan]

I made a post about a side by side of Pen and Colin's first and last dance (so far) from S1 and S3 and now I'm drowning in the feels of it.

LOOK AT THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THESE TWO LAST SHOTS

S1E1 - Vauxhall ball dance

Them being such babies. Them jumping around, utterly caught by the energy of the dance. This is the first dance that Pen ever has after she's come out in society and I want to say that this is the first time that she's actually seen Colin as a man after he "rescued her". This is when the rose-coloured tinted glasses are shining brightly on her face as she looks at this boy she grew up with dancing with her in public, laughing and holding her in his arms. This is the first time she was held by another man in her life (I don't think her dad was ever affectionate towards her). Her first physical encounter with a man and it's with Colin no less (Colin really is first in everything where Penelope is concerned).

Even though there is a closeness between her and Colin already at this time, there is always Eloise in the middle. We think that Eloise being away in S3 gave them a chance to be alone together but Pen's 1st season out in society actually also gave the first chance of being alone with Colin (and then Marina came and ruined it all).

I also want to note that Pen is utterly cute in this scene. Ladies aren't supposed to wear their hair out the way Pen has it here. This alone should have told us that she is a rebel but also of how invisible she is.

Last thing to note (and this maybe just because of editing or this very beautiful but challenging height difference these two have blocking wise) is that we don't really see their faces clearly (I checked the actual video and it really is shot like that). We're only meant to feel the amusement these two have over this brief dance and I'm sure Pen went home on Cloud 9, thinking about this dance over and over.

It was her first romantic core memory.

Now we go to this scene:

S3E8 - Dankworth - Finch ball dance (Butterfly dance)

I have so many feelings about this dance. Firstly, their hand size difference!

Their smiles! Them overcoming such a huge obstacle! Colin just blasting every other love confession I've seen on this show! Them accepting each other fully, finally seeing each other for who they are. Them now ready to fully embrace their married life. I could go on and on and I will.

Both looking so ridiculously happy in this slow, intimate dance. Both looking so sexy and powerful, showing their acceptance of their maturity. It took them a while and a whole angsty journey but watching them take each step towards each other spoke to my heart and soul deeply. Their smiles in this dance was such a treat after being subjected to heartbreak.

In comparison with the shot in S1E1, we see both from their heads to their body (heart) but behind other dancers. I'm just thinking that this is the director saying this now will be your POV of Pen and Colin-- at the start of living their lives openly.

(I'm feeling sleepy now but I want to finish this)

It is so rewarding to see the journey that Pen and Colin goes through. I've been rewatching all 3 seasons and catching the growth between these two is so fascinating. The parallels, the clues, the subtle performances that Nic and Luke have been presenting on the table since S1. All so overwhelming at times at how privileged I feel to see their story laid out so beautifully.

What a gift Pen and Colin's love story is. I love their love and I'll stay here just for a little bit.