#because at least I'll be at peace
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I recently made a poll asking others if they think Transformers One will get a sequel. These were the results.

On the one hand, most of us who have seen this movie definitely feel an air of uncertainty regarding the future of the TF One continuity.
On the other hand, many voters still chose Maybe Yes/No over flat-out No. And the Yes option (even if it got second) got a good chunk of votes, so there's still that sense of hope until we get confirmation otherwise. We're not sure, but we’re optimistic.
If the sequel happens, we’ll rejoice and speculate with excitement about what could come next.
If the sequel never happens, I know the fans will continue to make art & write fics to make up for it. I've already seen so much great material from the fans and hope to see more in the future!
No matter what happens, we’ll continue to support & praise this movie in the years to come.
#transformers#transformers one#tf one#they really need to confirm if that sequel is happening or not#I’m prepared for both outcomes but like…#i need to know#because at least I'll be at peace
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THIRTY-ONE DAYS OF GHOST ⛧ DAY TWO
the song that made you a fan — Spillways
“This is an elegy for the darkness that most people have inside. When you have a dam, spillways are the run-offs so the dam won’t overflow. That darkness inside us needs to find its way out,” — Tobias Forge
Job 10:1 "I loathe my own life; I will give full vent to my complaint; I will speak in the bitterness of my soul."
#ghost31#user copia gfx#papa emeritus iv#user copia edits#the band ghost#user copia all tag#spillways#flashing gif#what is the footage so blurry for smh. supposed to be hd#this was the first song from ghost i listened to in full and what a fitting beginning#if i start to talk about how much it means to me i'll be here all day#it's with me for life this one#i feel like everyone in some way can get something from it#regardless of how serious or deep their personal situation is#there's always an opportunity for a bit of self acceptance#damn i said i wouldnt start doing this skdhbkjhds#i'll stop now but sending hugs to anyone who has ever found something in these lyrics or even just the word 'spillways'#extra love to those who have hated themselves because of the spillways of your soul#i hope you've found at least the beginning of peace with it#i have and this song was my beginning#..... even more love to autistic people lmao#ANYWAY. BYE.
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you would think that the scariest part of peaceful property would be the ghosts but no, actually it's the emotional damage. and also that bit in episode 6 when they forget which bowl has the real chickpeas in it and they just sort of guess even though peach has already put that guy in a coma because of his food allergy once because oh my god what the fuck
#this is a show with many ghosts in it and it's about peach's fear so i'll take this scene as more of a metaphor and that's okay#but peach. peach my darling.#in a literal way you can't be doing that (serving 25% chance of chickpea death because you want to trust home)!! you really cannot#*#peaceful property#a headcanon way to fix this would be. when peach tastes from the two bowls he CAN tell which is the right one.#and he just wants home to tell him. which would explain why peach is the only one So Sure it'll be fine and why he's THAT set#on serving this dish that could kill or at least very seriously hospitalize a man.#but you know. that really is just inserting something into canon that's not there at all. in canon they're just gambling with chai-un
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Well, I let little things happen to me and then I think they are tremendous
#moomin#moominvalley#muumilaakson tarinoita#snufkin#nuuskamuikkunen#snusmumriken#kala art#this is rather rough but to be honest I'm happy with it anyway because I painted a proper backround!!#All it takes is one random YouTube recommendation and boom I'm 10 years old and watching Moomins on the TV again#I'm planning on rewatching the whole 90s series (at least what i can find) and then I'll watch the 2019 series for the first time#Moomins is one of those things that always makes me feel peaceful because it was so integral to my childhood
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interview
Bonus: the genuine reaction in question
#yes because I'm THAT masochistic#juan carlos ferrero#carlos alcaraz#i'll go down with this ship#carlitos & juanki#them ❤️#tennis#gifs#neck kisses 😘❤️#I kinda miss those peaceful (at least tennis-wise) times
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Blanche's grandma's place is the only place she felt consistently loved in... no I'm fine. I'm fine
#the IMPLICATIONS#i completely forgot about that line#room 7 makes me lose my mind in general but ohhh my god#OH my god#i'm#yeah no i'm fine#i have so many feelings about this i can't even put them into words#idk but she speaks about that place with so so much nostalgia#we see blanche in a way we've never seen her with anyone from her past#she didn't look even remotely as happy or peaceful (or nostalgic!) when she visited her childhood home#but when she's in her grandma's old home? she calls it her family home#she talks about it like *that's* the place she grew up in#because apparently it was the only place she was always sure she could be loved#so i guess it might not have been the only place she grew up in#but it sure sounds like it was the one place she was allowed to be herself in and still be loved unconditionally#without competing for anyone's attention#ohh blanche ;-;#i teared up when she held that windchime and smiled right before finally leaving that house#that was *such* a powerful moment ;-;#anyway#uh#i guess i'll just go and stare at a wall or something now#the golden girls#blanche devereaux#adding on to this to say that maybe it really was the only place she grew up in#because to grow up i'd say you need an environment where you can at least somewhat freely explore your identity#without feeling a constant need to be the best/cutest/prettiest sister to get your parents' love and approval#it sounds like blanche grew older in her childhood home#and she got the chance to *grow up* with her grandma#(i knoooow i'm reading too much into this but i can't stop thinking about this episode)
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I was going to have rye maaaybe start to buy into solas' whole johnny silverhand deal a little bit more in the post-weisshaupt talk -- to Progress the Arc tm/set up the beginning softening in that relationship and heighten the effect when it eventually goes. quite another way entirely -- but the sheer spectacular cruelty in hindsight of 'at least you still have varric to talk to' is such that considering where I'm intending to end up with this narratively, the stoic 'not here to make friends you fucker gimme your intel' option is simply irresistible. gotta have that echo rattling around rye's head forever when he decides that you know what? I have had enough of being nice, actually. I do want to go ape shit. someone hold my coat for me please I have some work to do and I don't want to stain it. guess for now the ol' watcher training & instincts are still kicking in enough for them to treat solas like a tricky spirit you should treat with respect and good intentions, but also shouldn't be out there offering little fingers to unless you have a whole arm lying around to spare haha
#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age spoilers#I LOVED weisshaupt as a mission tho. I've seen it through multiple times and still my heart was going so fucking fast haha#also bringing lucanis with you is SO funny and weirdly sweet even tho you miss the 'you call that nice and quiet??' part#(you get neve just swearing instead! a very good substitute hfdskjah sorry neve...)#it really feels like he and rook keep turning to each other as everything escalates exponentially with like...#helpless and numb but deeply companionable shrugs. we are both equally near-existentially baffled by this. but at least#we are near-existentially baffled by this *together*. thanks man. yeah I mean. she IS a cloud. i don't know what else to say here#all we can do is give it a shot right. yeah. yup. good talk dude check in with you in a minute we gotta kill some ghouls#and then the Arcs both lucanis and rye are on with davrin too especially when they're all making peace in the library...#*steeples fingers with narrative glee and excitement* yes yeeess it's all coming together#oc: Ellaryen Ingellvar#I love solas so much. but that comment is straight up so awful. he says it sooo... *smugly*. it's because he's frustrated#at his powerlessness and being denied access to rook's interior life and getting his hooks into them psychologically I realize#which is his best and only path back to agency at this point#but it's such an ugly instinct to drop something like that in there because it makes YOU feel better#that was not just a 'oh better remind rook they can always talk to their old pal varric for tactical reasons!' there was feeling in that#tho you know the reason I love solas is primarily the multiple other comments he has through that convo#that are laugh out loud hilarious to me. he's such a little SHIT!!! always and forever <3#listen man... in another life I'll come back for you and we'll be kinder to each other that time in the end huh
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Merry Christmas!
And an early happy new year, since I'll be traveling at that time and won't be able to post anything. Sorry for the long disappearance. I wish I had some exciting excuse like being abducted by the fae or becoming a spy, but really I've just been going through a lot and haven't been drawing much. Here are a couple of fantasy style Klausen (or maybe the more widely recognized Krampi) by way of apology. I hope you all have been good this year.
#my trash#/end classification tags#also for everyone who was wishing me well after toothless died: i've had a chance to adjust#i'm not happy but i've adjusted#i got a new kitten to keep the calico company and so he's helping to distract me and i've been keeping busy training him#i've pretty much finished moving in to the new place but i don't know when i'll be leaving again so it's an uneasy period of peace#not unpacking much yet until i have an idea of where i'll be in the spring/summer because otherwise it could be a lot of unnecessary bother#but yeah#again sorry for the long absence#i've missed you guys#i meant to pop in at least a LITTLE bit more frequently during my hiatus but real life has no regards for my plans
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I guess some days you're just fated to stand in a field for two hours watching a tractor sink into the mud. Never thought it would be my field, mind.
#i just wanted some sand to line my pond!#instead i lost my afernoon to....tractors.#had to beg the farmer across the way for help again.#at least the bloke who got stuck was from the same tiny village as my parents lololol#and the morning started with the builder being like 'soz my dog's better but i had a wee heart attack so can't come this week'#ok. fine. it's just like that. nothing in this house is simple.#one day i'll move in and i'll never know peace because it won't feel real.#adventures in home ownership take 2
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I fucking hate being traumatized because why am I bawling the hardest I've bawled in god-knows-how-long because someone I didn't even like that much berated Me. gasping wailing trembling and snotting over this for several minutes.
#personal#sanism#abuse mention#child abuse mention#I'm still not entirely done crying really. I'm just trying to stop and calm Myself. not doing well at the moment#because someone on the discord server mentioned trump's inauguration and I basically said 'I don't like trump either#but it's still important to keep pushing for change. who's in office doesn't change that' and he just. immediately escalated the situation#accused Me of not caring about oppression. I explained Myself further but he told Me to go fuck Myself and capped it off with#'you already admitted to being a fucking narcissist so why would i want to be around you' (exact quote BTW)#and I just can't stop sobbing. I don't know if I've cried this much since I was 13. I keep having to pause My typing because I start crying#I didn't hate him but I wasn't attached to him either. it's just that I have so much fucking trauma along these lines#so many instances of My mom putting words in My mouth. getting short-tempered with Me over benign remarks that I didn't understand#because I'm autistic. dismissing My opinions. making Me hide My feelings and issues from her#because she's made it clear that she doesn't trust people like Me#it's made Me have so much trouble handling even friendly social interaction. I've only just learned how to do that#I just can't handle having that same mistreatment forced onto Me by anyone else. especially with so little warning or build-up#and what makes Me break down even worse is the fact that I know I'll have to deal with him again#he wasn't even punished while this was happening. despite the server owner and other mod being online. the owner just said 'stressful day'#and the other mod started talking with a regular user about how it was uncalled for once he had already left the conversation#nobody even checked in on Me. even though I stayed online for a good half-an-hour afterwards. I only just logged off a few minutes ago#because the notifications from unrelated conversations started overstimulating Me#regardless. I don't even want to see him again. I don't want to be in the same server as him I don't want to talk to him I don't want to#but it's not a real formal server. it's a 'friend group.' and they've shown before that they prioritize keeping the peace#over actually punishing hostility. just a week or so ago I told them I wasn't comfortable with them using the R-slur#and someone freaked out over My complaint being 'politically correct' and left. he was brought back just a few days later. and before that#he had already derailed a previous discussion I tried to have about the word by sending gifs featuring it and redirecting the conversation#that sucked but at least it wasn't outright triggering. but I just can't stand the thought of having to be around someone#who treated Me so much like how My abuser has. that's the most I've ever had to relive My trauma because of someone else#that's the most anyone has ever mirrored it to Me. I just can't stand it but I know I'll have to be around him#I don't even know if he's gonna apologize. he's made it clear how little he thinks of Me as a human being. PLUS
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All the stock images of the 10th Doctor are. Silly. Like geniune white-backdrop, doing some random pose or expression stock images. Like not "this is the picture png stock image that gets slapped on his wiki and other places" but like the if you Google "stock images of people" it's just that. Except him.
#carry me through these trying times.#sorry i. Am trying not to talk about it a ton but i wanted to mention it at least here and on discord once but.#Im having a bit of a MomentTM. Particularly what im praying(knock on wood) is a hypocondriact one.#It probably wont effect here as much and most my discord but. If i seem a little extra inactive then that is why.#Dont worry I'll make an update post when I am rejoicing in “I was right!! I was just massively overthinking it all and nothing is wrong!!!”#Again. knocking on wood. Only fates I want to jinx are the ones where I say i wont catch feelings for a character and then i do.#anywho. on a lighter note.#I teasered this a little bit in my last post I was wondering if anyone would notice I put Doctor Who in that pile of fixations.#Though I think someone. cough. Mightve had an extra pre-teaser to it due to. me suddenly mentioning it while in a mutual server. cough.#but I think someone else in the server is a double so im just going to. this blog is going to be getting my blunt force of it.#truthfully I normally leave servers that have doubles but considering theyve never talked about them then.#As long as that continues. Im. Will be fine. SOULY JUDT BECAUSE hes new to me and they never spoke of him.#If this was an F/O i already had then even if they never mentioned them I'd still probably go.#this is why i. get a bit bummed whenever someone doesnt list their F/Os. especially because for some reason-#-I've been on a streak of getting into increasingly more and more popular fandoms.#Im beginning to think im just using this as a coping mechanism at this point by overwhelming myself-#-with huge amounts of new big strong feelings that clog and clutter my mind.#wow Kane. selfshipping? to cope? what a new and unique idea /j/j/j/sarcasm#these tags were supposed to end after the first couple of sentences. hello everyone.#If you read all this here's 25$ to go spend on something nice. Get whatever you'd like.#i wouldnt put it past me to fall for different iterations of the Doctor as well but that is purposely exactly why I am-#-skipping ones and doing only this particular iteration one. Thank you wiki page that listed out what episodes are what doctors.#I mean they're all technically the same one. but also not. but also I dont entirely know what im talking about.#okay OKAY clamming up now. Good morning everyone. sending you all peace and tranquility
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#i just need to lose 4 more kg and I'll be okay#even 3 kg would be okay 🥲#I'm stuck at work looking at frozen loading screen and this is all i can think about#and I'm scared that I let myself ago again but it was hard because I couldn't control my calorie intake and burn#but i think that i can do it#i just don't want to gain any more weight#otherwise I'm completely sane 🙂#also I don't mean to brag but I want to brag...i can run now at least 5km#and it feels so good because few years ago I couldn't run for 30 seconds without stopping#it's one of those things you just suddenly realise and it instantly makes you so happy#like i even forgot it's something I wanted so bad long time ago#and now I don't even know how it's real#all i need is to lose those few kgs and I'll reach inner peace and nirvana and clarity#anyways... thank you for listening to my nonsense#i promise that one day I'll shut up about issues about my weight#i hope that you all are doing great ❤️
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hate that i'm back to blasting my fucking ear drums out, just so i don't hear the fucking dogs
#🔪.text#sorry i am. very tired.#the ear muffs were great initially. but now they aren't enough.#because the dogs barking stresses me the fuck out now#and they alone can't completely block them all out.#so now i have to wear them and start blasting my ear drums out again.#i hate this. it hurts. but it's better than having to hear the fucking dogs#i'm trying to not do it unless they're barking but. god.#they just bark all the fucking time.#i am so tired.#at least tomorrow i go to a petsitting job for two weeks.#so i'll finally have some fucking peace without dogs.
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I NEEED to go back to making art that makes it ABUNDANTLY clear that theres something wrong with my brain BUT NOT in a cool or stylishly interesting way. i need to do it in a way that makes people say "hm." and walk away
#sowwy ive been kinda going through it in my fine arts major rn can u tell HJKSDHKFd#ive been feeling like. scared. and paralyzed by marketability and branding.#i cant stop thinking about how other people will see my art. but not like in a good way#when i was younger i thought about it in a good way. like hee hee hoo hoo the act of looking connected us hee hee#but rn i keep thinking about it in like this wretched like consumer product mindset? ouhhghhhhh el problema es el capitalismo#and like maybe this works for some people. to think like this. to make art like this. its what my professors push me towards#not intentionally. they dont say it out loud at least. im not sure if they know or not some of the irony#my professors are nice and pretty smart and talented and i like em. but sometimes i wonder like. the push for us as students to make like#marketable 'avant garde'? stuff thats safe but pretending to be weird and out there#i dont mean to sound pretentious. in general i play it too safe myself (spent too much time as an edgy 10 year old with my#parents freaking out over my shoulder because they think the fact that i drew an anime character frowning means something serious LOL)#but i dunno man. my least interesting art with the least amount of care thought or effort always gets so much more attention in school#nowhere else oddly. online? people like my more passionate but seemingly frivolous art (oc art etc. not frivolous to me but yknow how it is#same with irl artists and other industry people outside my school. whats going on in my school LOL#i know from experience i cant push myself into a supposedly marketable brand. if i try to make something sell it will not.#i dont know why. maybe theres an invisible essence buyers can tell when i didnt care jkfsldjdfrds#but my teachers LOOOOVE the stuff i put no passion in its so bizarre orz but i gotta relearn how to ignore half of their advice#i used to be better at it. but i also only used to ignore like a quarter of their advice. maybe i need to amp up how much im ignoring#that sounds mean. they have plenty of good advice. but also plenty of advice thats clouded by their own biases#and i gotta relearn how to sort out this stuff again. i forget every few months for some reason#you know i always think ouuhhhhh i act so neurotypical ouhhhhhhhhh im outgoing i talk to strangers all the time i seem confident#im so masked IM SO MASKED but then i go a couple weeks where every conversation i have has people looking at me like#i have two heads and neither of them are speaking their language. and then i descend into madness like this HJKLDSHJDS#i'll be fine i'll figure it out. i need to stop trying to get a good grade in being a 'cutting edge' conventional artist <3#i need to just. draw my cartoon characters in peace 😔😔😔
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- How’s Kusanagi?
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- He’s grateful to his best friend.
#tantei galileo#chinmoku no parade#utsumi kaoru#yukawa manabu#i could write so much meta off of these two microexpressions#especially yukawa's little twitch there; like he's not quite sure if what he should be feeling is happiness#like his first impulse is to question utsumi's statement#like he's thinking:#'i did it for you utsumi because once again you pushed me out of my comfortable place and reminded me of what's important'#they are still two people speaking in icebergs#is kusanagi grateful? most likely#is utsumi also taking it on herself to forge peace for kusanagi? that's one read#she's also quite content that yukawa seems to care enough that he asked#is she also saying she herself is grateful that yukawa listened to her? oh definitely#at least that's how i see it#at some point i'll be trying to close-read utsumi and yukawa's responses to each other in silent parade#but thinking about it right now is bittersweet#tg: mine: gif
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saw a take with over a thousand notes that was so fucking rancid i spent perhaps an hour typing a longass catty response that i edited into something methodical and not novel length, decided not to publish out of fear of freaks in my inbox, blocked the user, went through the five stages of grief in the shower wrt the mutual who put that shit on my dash, questioned my own morality because of how adamant and matter-of-fact OP was while drying off, decided i WASN'T the one who was out of touch, softblocked the mutual, went and smoked my second to last cigarette, then hardblocked the mutual.
#len speaks#decided i'd just be disgusted with myself if i saw that mutual on the dash ever again no matter how fun their posts are tbh#thought i'd be able to get by with two cigarettes tomorrow and walk to the corner store on monday. alas!#guess i'll have to ask my dad to drive me for more cigarettes tomorrow afternoon. probably fitting considered i smoked through at LEAST#a pack and a half because it was either that or start a screaming match with the fucker and stop referring to him as my dad to his face#anyways. i'm coping. i'm undoubtedly overreacting to stupid tumblr shit bc of personal issues but hey i've a therapy appt scheduled already#and i at least feel more at peace rn. thank god for cigarettes
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