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basketballandtextbooks · 4 years

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how does fandom ruin tweek????

eh, my wording may have been a bit strong

I don’t mean to say that fandom has destroyed him. There are... remnants of his actual personality that appear in popular fanon and frankly, even if someone rewrites his personality entirely, that doesn’t ‘destroy’ his character. It’s just someone enjoying themselves.

What I meant is that the popular fanon depiction of Tweek nearly destroyed his character for me. Upon watching the show, I loved Tweek and he became one of my favorite side characters. I enjoyed his disinterest in getting into a death match for the boys entertainment, his annoyance at making a million fucking hats, his frustration over no one believing him about the goddamn underpants gnomes, his ability to point a fucking grenade launcher at someone who took his friends (and cartman) hostage.

He’s honestly a great character and he’s always been hugely likeable.

But when I went to the fandom and looked up Tweek... I was so disappointed with what I found. I tried to enjoy the overly feminine troped Tweek, I really did. I tried to find his hairclips cute (despite the fact that most boys would use hair gel to get their hair out of their face and bad hair gel use honestly EXPLAINS Tweek’s super saiyan hair). I really tried to enjoy pictures that made him tiny and weak and cutely hiding behind Craig. Shaking in fear because the world is so scary and he’s so anxious.

I tried. And I think trying is why it nearly ruined him for me.

Because the more I tried to enjoy that character, the more I found him boring. Stupid. Vapid. Idiotic. Tropey. Cliche. I began to associate the fanon version of Tweek with the canon version of Tweek and it made me actually roll my eyes when he’d appear in episodes. “here’s the little bitch baby again, gonna cry and hide? ugh...”

To be fair, I have liked and enjoyed cowardly and/or anxious characters before and since (like Courage the cowardly dog lol), but the way all of his traits had been simplified into just being... so 2-dimensional and worthless. It really made him annoying to me. Like Courage at least saves the day despite being scared, the fanon Tweek I’d become familiar with just shakes and screams and stutters until his Big Strong Boyfriend saves the day.

Stealing Tweek’s personality, justifying dressing him like a girl because he’s SO CUTE (after all, he dressed like a girl in the metrosexual ep... you know... like every other character in sp... and yet.... we don’t see craig in a skirt that often...), and turning him into a stereotypical trope of a damsel in distress.

It was insulting. It was insulting to myself as a person who suffers from an anxiety disorder. That the entire fandom had equated anxiety to ‘weakness’ and ‘cowardice’ despite the fact that Tweek had never been weak or cowardly, only freaked out. It was insulting that parts of his personality that I really loved had to be ignored and changed to make room for noncanon character traits that only served to make him a ‘cute little twink for Craig’.

I constantly reference his connection to Craig as well because Tweek also didn’t seem to exist outside of Creek. He was THERE to be Craig’s cute bottom. No personality. No ideology. He ONLY existed to be the object of Craig’s affections. Or to be head over heels in love with Craig. His entire personality was being scared and in love with Craig. Even when people would ship him with other characters, it was normally an extension to Creek (oh, craig used to have a crush on thomas... what if tweek and thomas get together! oh wow, crenny is really popular, lets make twenny instead!). And even moreso, this hyper feminized ooc cowardly little bitch version of a character I love would go on to be that same bitch in every ship connected to Creek.

AND THE MOST FRUSTRATING PART of his character being boiled down to ‘weak’, ‘fem’, and ‘in love with Craig’ is that Craig has only RECENTLY become a huge part of his life. Yes, he was an on-again off-again member of CATG but so was Jimmy and Jason, yet neither of them are defined solely by their connection to Craig. He had multiple episodes focusing on him, only ONE of them that even related to Craig (which was against his will) and yet he was defined entirely by his connection to a character he’s hardly had interactions with. Yes, NOW Creek are hardly ever seen apart in canon. But Tweek x Craig happened in like season 18 or someshit. There were SEVENTEEN SEASONS of Craig and Tweek NOT interacting much AT ALL. And yet, even prior to the Creek episode, Tweek was defined ENTIRELY by his love to Craig.

I love a good crack ship, for example I’ve recently gotten into clymien, but I wouldn’t define Damien or Clyde’s ENTIRE personality by their feelings for one another. That’s just... ick. I like them together BECAUSE I think their personalities would clash in interesting ways. Creek was an interesting crackship that became canon but god has the fandom for it always been so freaking ooc that its actually painful.

I also bring up Creek bc im ngl, the fandom has practically ruined that ship for me. I’ve been able to regain my love of Tweek but my love of Creek has become... shaky. The constant nonstop seme/uke trope dynamics super-imposed onto what would otherwise be extremely interesting characters within an adorable ship has just poisoned the well for me. I’m still working on regaining my love for Creek, but it’s been very slow.

It’s not fair to say the fandom ruined Tweek. They didn’t. Plenty of people love him, enjoy him, and there’s plenty of fandom that doesn’t completely bastardize his personality... but for me? Every time I see a remnant of that strange fanon Tweek that I’ve grown to hate, I just cringe.

#honestly i mean no hate to people who like that version of tweek #if you do im happy for you #i tried to and i couldnt #i've honestly started to exclusively enjoy fanart of tweek that specifically draws him with masculine traits #give him a strong jaw #or maybe some muscles #or how about you make him a gangly gross rat boy #but twink tweek is a huge no for me #and fem tweek of any kind is so hard for me to swallow #Anonymous #i'll never stop being frustrated that they essentially just copy and pasted butters' fashion sense #butters is objectively the type to like hairclips and tutus and shit #so they decided 'we'll just give tweek and kyle that same fashion sense!'#because all bottoms dress alike dont you know #and they purposefully ignore any and all of craig's more feminine traits #because craig is a 'top' so that means he has to be hyper masculine #honestly its rlly homophobic and gross to stereotype gay men like that #'bottoms' are all feminine little twinks and 'tops' are all super butch masculine men #nevermind the fact that most actual relationships cant be divided into 'top bottom' shit #and that shit is so heteronormative #but fine i'll accept its fiction and not reality so its fine #what i wont accept is that its interesting #watching the same stereotyped heteronormative relationship is one of the most boring things ever to me

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sleepy-exe · 3 years

Text

Shapeshifter AU - 9

Iwaizumi x f!reader

<< Part 8 | Part 10 >>

Summary: The morning after Iwaizumi found out about shapeshifters. Y/n tries to play it cool. Iwaizumi gets to see into part of her world.

Word count: 3k

Warnings: none, fluff

Genre: sfw (18+ regardless), shapeshifter au, strangers to lovers

a/n: Ahhhh this is so late. The next two parts are almost ready at least. Haha..

Part 9: Walls Will Fall

Y/n woke up in her bed at home, alone as usual. Not long after her and Iwaizumi’s shapeshifter discussion, she had to head home to get ready for work later that morning. She had today off though, so she could clear her head from yesterday’s events, and she hoped to hear from Iwaizumi. He had texted her once that evening after he got home from his own job, not that he’d planned to come over. He still didn’t know exactly where she lived anyway. Regardless, he normally says more even if he doesn’t seem to text much. She hoped he wasn’t scared off.

>> To ‘zumi’: “good morning~”

She immediately cursed herself realizing she majorly slept in. It’s far from morning now. She stretched while sitting in bed for a moment before heading to her master bathroom. Her phone chimed as she stepped foot on the tiled floor, so she ran back to grab the phone she had left behind before heading to do her morning routine. She checked her notifications while grabbing an elastic to push any baby hairs out of her face. He texted back already. She sighed in relief; having wondered if he’d answer at all.

>> From ‘zumi’: “morning? Dont tell me you just woke up”

>> From ‘zumi’: “y/n it’s 1pm”

She smiled to herself. At least she didn’t get a one word reply. He can’t be completely avoiding her then, right?

>> To ‘zumi’: “course not i meant afternoon lol”

>> From ‘zumi’: “you totally just woke up”

She admitted defeat in silence and headed for the shower. During her shower and the rest of her morning ritual, she heard several dings from her phone but ignored them.

Exiting the en suite, she tossed her phone onto the bed before walking to the kitchen completely naked. The joys of living alone. She grabbed a water bottle from her fridge and checked the cat’s bowls before returning to her bed, water in hand.

She swapped the bottle for her phone, plopping down on the foot of the bed with a light bounce. There were various app notifications that she ignored and texts from a few friends, which she also ignored. For now. She’s not a bad friend for that, right?

But below her friends’ texts was another text from Iwaizumi, and she clicked it. She’s definitely going to reply to her other two friends very soon.

>> From ‘zumi’: “no reply makes it sound like I was right”

>> To ‘zumi’: “maybe I was busy all morning”

>> From ‘zumi’: “I thought you had the day off”

>> To ‘zumi’: “Nope was definitely busy and I’m definitely being productive”

>> From ‘zumi’: “prove it”

She paused. She’s pretty sure he’s expecting a pic. At least if she was texting Mizuki or another friend that would be more or less a demand for a selfie to prove what she’s actually doing. But not only would that prove she lied, she still hadn’t picked out clothes to wear.

Her cat suddenly jumped onto her bed and started head butting her. “Yeah yeah, breakfast. I saw you had some left in your bowl, kitty cat.”

>> To ‘zumi’: “well i can’t send a pic not dressed”

After several minutes of giving the cat much needed attention, she moved her to the side so she could get to her wardrobe. While she decided on an outfit, she heard her phone chime again, but decided maybe she should go ahead and get dressed.

Now fully clothed she grabbed her phone and headed over to do some minimal makeup. Fill in her brows, cover her dark circles, the usual.

>> From ‘zumi’: “Not dressed this late in the afternoon? At work?”

>> From ‘zumi’: “I dont believe that’s normally acceptable in an office setting”

>> From ‘zumi’: “I’m guessing that means one of those things was a lie. you’re not supposed to lie to your friends”

She clicked her tongue. “Okay.. Oh wait!”

Friends!

She quickly checked her other messages. Sakusa and another friend had texted her earlier. Sakusa just sent a reminder about plans they had made for later in the week, so she confirmed the plans were still on. Her best friend surprisingly didn’t blow up her phone for ignoring him; not that he had anything important to say. She typed out a quick message to him, then got back to Iwaizumi.

>> To ‘zumi’: “fine I did sleep in”

>> To ‘zumi’: “sorry for lying how can I ever make it up to you”

Mochi was on her heels as she left the bedroom. “Okay! Okay!”

>> From ‘zumi’: “depends”

>> From ‘zumi’: “are you planning on getting dressed today”

She chuckled, and quickly gave Mochi food and fresh water.

>> To ‘zumi’: “yeah. Done. Mochi got her breakfast and now I’m getting mine”

As she stepped into her kitchen, Iwa was already calling her. What did she expect? She sighed and answered the call.

“You haven’t eaten yet?!” Did she expect him to say anything else? No.

“Hello to you, too.”

“Y/n.”

“Don’t dad me.”

“Wha-“

“Don’t ya have work today?”

“No, I have today off.”

“Oh. Fun fun.” She sent a request to switch to video chat before working on her brunch.

“..You’re dressed, right?”

She snorted. “I generally don’t cook naked.”

“Generally?” He accepted the switch to video call and she propped her phone up on the countertop. She could see he was indoors, but did not recognize where.

“I’m making something to eat now, but we can talk. Don’t worry, I’m fully clothed.” She snickered.

“Oh, so you do live somewhere,” he said with a coy smile. She winced at the nod to her secrecy. “What are you making?”

She paused staring down at her phone, then looked around and left the phone’s frame.

“You haven’t even figured out that much? I can’t believe you haven’t had anything to eat yet! It’s after 3pm!”

“It’s not-“ She caught sight of the time on the microwave and winced again. Whoops. She popped her head back in the camera frame long enough for a, “Nah.. Totally know what I’m cooking, yup!”

But she still caught his less than pleased expression before she turned away. She heard a sigh then, “Why don’t we just have lunch together?”

“Oh? You wanna have lunch with me, Iwaizumi?” She said, digging through the refrigerator for something she could make a meal out of.

“Do you want to cook or do you want to join me?” He cocked an eyebrow.

“Boo.” She picked the phone up and held it in front of her as she abandoned what food and cookware she already laid out. “Yeah, I’d love to go get somethin’. Anything.” She glanced around the room. “I apparently need to grocery shop.”

He shook his head. “Any preference?”

“Nah. I’m literally wilting away. I’ll eat anything.” She threw an arm over her face dramatically as she walked from the kitchen.

He laughed. “Okay. I’m already out. Want to meet me somewhere?“

“Well, if yer out already,” she smirked and fell back onto the loveseat, “Why don’t you get whatever and come to my place. We can eat here.”

“Uh huh. I don’t know where you live, you little shit,” he grumbled.

“Ah, well, I could text you my address.. Are you anywhere near Kita ward?” His eyes were fixed on her through the screen, but he gave no response, verbally or otherwise. Her cheerful expression dropped and she spoke with an apologetic tone, “Look, I’m sorry about not sharing this stuff. I only didn’t want you to know where I live to be careful. Because the whole.. y’know..”

“Because you were afraid that I knew. And now you know that I do. How is that better?” The screen adjusted as he stepped outdoors from wherever he was.

She flicked stray hair out of her face. “Well.. because of your reaction. That’s what I was afraid of. But it was fi-“

“I’m still mad about it,” he commented without looking at the screen as he walked. Wherever he is isn’t too busy.

“Yeah, well.. ya have the right to be.”

“Please, just.. don’t lie to me anymore.” He stared at her through the screen with furrowed brows.

She nodded. “I won’t. I promise.” Mochi jumped over her face and onto the arm of the loveseat behind her head. “Also, sorry for lying this morning too.”

“What- Was that a cat?”

“Huh? Yeah.”

He just stared for a second before shaking his head. “And I don’t care about the thing earlier. Playing around and teasing is different than hiding a part of yourself and your life.”

“Yeah..” Mochi flipped her tail in Y/n’s face and she quickly slid it away. She then tilted her phone up so the cat was now in front of the phone and the shifter’s head was peeking from the bottom of the screen. “This is Mochi by the way. Umm, are ya allergic to cats?”

“So that’s who that is, huh. And no, I was just surprised you had a cat. You never talk about it.”

Around you, comment best left to herself.

“Good ‘cause her fur is everywhere.”

Y/n ran across the apartment when she heard knocking at the front door. Unlocking it, she opened the door to Iwaizumi with takeout. “Hey! Did ya have any trouble getting here?”

The smell of food suddenly hit her and she moaned, “I am so hungry. Oh my gosh, thank you.”

He stepped into her apartment and kicked off his shoes. “I didn’t think you’d live in the city.”

He looked around the apartment. It appeared to be not much bigger than his, but the floor-to-ceiling windows along the entire wall to the right made it feel much larger.

Y/n grabbed the bags of takeout from him and ran off to the kitchen which sat to the left, dining table sitting in the area between the entryway and kitchen.

The floors were a grey wood and the walls were painted a darker grey. The white and black in the kitchen along with her mostly black furniture definitely gave the space a monochrome feel.

“What, thought I lived in the woods?” She laughed. “I just run there. And, like, chill there. I love nature and the city alike, and this is closer to work so..”

He walked toward the living room, walking past a sofa to reach the wall of windows. Mochi jumped onto a small end table next to him to request a greeting. He ran a hand along Mochi’s back after letting her sniff him. “What do you do again? It’s close by?”

“Uhh,” he could hear her shuffling around in the kitchen, “Best summary would be really boring business stuff. For other businesses. Around Chuo Ward.”

“How creative,” he said dryly.

“Logistics,” the kitchen noises stopped, “Making calls, boring desk work.”

She walked up behind Iwaizumi so quietly he didn't notice she had left the kitchen. “I mean, other stuff too, but ya know.”

He jumped a little when her voice came from his right where she suddenly appeared.

She stifled a giggle. “Sorry. Do ya wanna eat over here?”

He gave a wary look.

“Believe me it’s fine,” she shooed the cat from the end table, “This little brat makes a bigger mess than you ever could.”

She paused before adding, “Ah.. Actually, I might make more messes.”

He snorted. “Wherever is fine.”

The two of them shared the larger of the two sofas. She placed her mostly empty noodle bowl on the coffee table, then leaned back and maneuvered so that her legs were draped over the arm of the sofa and her head resting against one of his thighs. “Excellent choice. You are definitely allowed to pick where we eat in the future,” she said staring at the ceiling, totally content.

Iwaizumi’s legs were stretched out in front of him, one hand holding a drink and the other now moved to the back of the sofa after Y/n claimed where the arm once was. “Oh yeah?”

She hummed in agreement, eyes now gazing across the room.

He looked towards the windows again, sipping at his drink. “I bet sunrise is pretty from here.”

She hummed again, but this time in disagreement. “Nah, wrong way. But I never wake up early enough anyway.”

He looked down at her resting face. She was wearing much less makeup than usual. It’s the first time he noticed the faint details of her face. “You wake up early enough when you stay with me,” voice low.

“Yeah.. But that’s the only time. I don’t sleep much there.” She opened her eyes just barely to look at him.

His eyebrows raised, he wasn’t aware of that. He thought she just woke up early. “Why’s that?”

She turned her head so she faced away from him now and spoke softly, “..Anxious maybe?” She turned back to him. “You make it sound like I stay with you a lot. I’ve only stayed twice.”

“I think it was three times.”

“Nah,” she sat up this time, kicking her legs around to face forward, just missing Mochi, “Maybe four times.”

“Definitely not four times.” He looked around the room again, taking in her home.

“Eh. Next time,” she reached down to swipe at Mochi under the coffee table.

He chuckled as Mochi took off to climb a cat tree against the wall behind them.

“So other animals..” He trailed off, not sure if he should finish that sentence.

“Cats don’t mind at all,” she met his gaze, “You’re talking about Mochi living with me, right? Dogs and some other animals do seem to notice, but she doesn’t. I could shapeshift in here and she wouldn’t care less.”

“And you can ask me whatever, I won’t get offended. Not really anyway.” She turned in her seat to fully face him, leaning her head against the arm he had along the back of the sofa. “Well, I mean, if you did ask something I didn’t want to answer, I just wouldn’t answer,” she playfully crinkled her nose at him to which he rolled his eyes.

He sat his drink to the side. “You do that in here?”

“What, shapeshift? Not usually.” She moved her attention to the windows. It was well into the evening now and sunset had started, shades of yellow and orange filling the sky around the city. “Hmm.. I might not get to see sunrise here, but sunset always gets me.”

He looked over this shoulder then shifted to face the windows to watch the sunset as well. “What’s better, sunset or sunrise?”

She shifted again, this time to sit on her legs. She hadn’t had the chance to go for a run lately, and it’s starting to catch up with her, making her fidget. She leaned forward, letting her chest press against his back and head rest on his shoulder. She hums. “They’re two different things that can’t be compared. I pick both.”

They stayed there in silence watching the sun set behind the tall buildings of Kita. At least until Mochi saw her chance and jumped onto the coffee table just to nosedive into takeout leftovers. Y/n jumped up, chasing the cat away. “Mochi!”

Iwaizumi shook his head, watching her remove a food container from Mochi’s head. “How about I help you clean this up?”

She exhaled, starting to already stack some of the takeout containers. “Sure. I’d appreciate it.”

He reached over to grab anything she missed and followed to dispose of everything. She made a second trip to carry glasses to the sink. He met her back in the kitchen just for her to grab his wrist and drag him back to the living room.

Sunset was almost over, the sky fading to darker shades, deep pinks and purples painting the sky. “Watching the sunset from here is beautiful,” she whispered.

They returned to their spot on the sofa, this time she leaned into his side. “But watching the sunrise from your living room.. feels warm.”

“Is that so?”

They stayed like that while the sun disappeared, lights of the city illuminating the dark blue sky. Iwaizumi caught her starting to doze off as she leaned heavier into him. One arm around her side, he shook her lightly. “Hey, go to bed.”

She stirred and grumbled a response, “Fine. Stay?”

“Yeah, if that’s what you want. I’ll stay out here. You go to bed.”

She sat up and stretched. “Nah. My bed‘s huge. It’s like a.. I don’t know.. There’s plenty of room.”

“No, that’s okay.” He watched her stand and shuffle towards the front door, checking the locks.

“Look, I can’t make ya,” her voice filled with exhaustion. She walked behind the sofa and reached over to wrap her arms around his shoulders in a lazy hug from where he sat. “But if ya change yer mind.”

“I’ll get blankets.” She released him and moved around the living room towards the back of the apartment. She walked through her bedroom to one of the closets and pulled out a huge fluffy blanket and headed for the living room.

Iwaizumi was outside the bedroom door by the time she reached it. “What’s up with you and sleepovers?”

“I get lonely.” She handed him the oversized blanket. “Here.”

Taking the blanket, he said, “We don't even sleep in the same room.”

“Yeah. Well.” Her unfocused eyes looking past him. “My other friends do, but that’s fine. Just bein’ here matters.” She yawned again before continuing, “I have extra pillows too.”

He waited outside the doorway as she went back to the closet to retrieve pillows. Unlike the rest of the apartment, her bedroom was colorful from what he could see, and also messy. Compared to the monochrome, nice and neat main areas, this room could have belonged to an entirely different unit.

She returned to the doorway with two pillows and they walked back to the living room. “If you need anything, ya know, make yerself at home,” she said sleepily followed by a yawn, “I’ll leave the door open. And if Mochi bugs you, you can close her in my room. She’s a cuddler.”

He smiled before chasing the tired shifter off to bed, exchanging goodnights.

Parts 10 >>

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purple-nana · 4 years

Text

Barriers

Part 9 - angst (maybe? oof)

1.5k words ( Part of the Dorm of us Series)

Warnings: Noneeeee

A/N: okie, first of all. IM SO SORRY FOR NOT POSTING AN FREAKIN UPDATE. Cuz my pc is kinda busted rn so i hate it so much and i dont like using the mobile version to update :/. But anyways i'll try to updatee more often oncee my pc is back on track achu. Okie you may read now ehe, tysm for waiting! <3

You stared mindlessly at your plain, white and boring ceiling. The endless whoosing noises of the air conditioning continued to be the only source of sound as you lay in your bed.

Maybe, a screw went off in your head that staring into thin air now intrigues you so much.

Well, who wouldn't though? With all the events that happened this month, you were sure that anyone would also lose their mind when they finally get to rest.

It was still hard to believe for you. A month has already passed since—you and Jaemin became a thing.

You smiled to yourself. Jaemin was a really great boyfriend even if—you don't what a great boyfriend is really like since, you've never had one.

But nonetheless you still think that Jaemin is a great one—or so you thought.

The first day was rather interesting if you were being honest. The both of you agreed to meet up at an 'fancy' restaurant.

However, when the both of you were actually there—Jaemin didn't know what to do as well as you who was also completely clueless.

Ditching the fancy restaurant plan, the two of you end up in the park—again. It was nice though, you get to talk with him and play with him, overall it was a fun night.

That's when you thought that Jaemin indeed was a great guy and maybe choosing to be with him was the right choice.

But—things went downhill after that.

The next couple of dates were rushed and was unplanned. It happened almost everywhere. The park, the campus. Most times, it happened at Mcdonald's.

You would wait there for at least an hour before Jaemin arrives, the both of you will just catch up and talk but after that—Jaemin would immediately leave.

It was that time where things were crazy busy cause midterms were coming and your schedule and his were not-so alike to each other.

Due to that, you can't really complain. You expected him to give more time to you at the dorms since it was the only place that the two of you could hang out without interruptions.

But instead—he kept on locking himself inside of his room.

Haechan actually cleaned his room the first two weeks into the month so Jaemin got to move in to his room in a swift.

You don't want to overthink about it, but you can't help it.

But it was somehow—you were being treated differently.

If you were to compare yourself to his ex, which was Oh Miri. He used to be out frequently with the reason of he was going to see Miri.

You wanted to believe that it was because of the midterms that was causing you this overthinking but at the same time—it also makes sense.

There was this part of you that was screaming that this was wrong, and another is telling you that Jaemin was really at fault.

It's giving you a headache.

You just want to get over with this and talk to him, the more you kept your mouth shut, the more you get these thoughts.

You just—want it to stop.

A knock on the door caused you to stop floating in your thoughts. And speaking of the devil, there was Jaemin, peeking his head through the small gap of the door.

You raised your eyebrow at him giving him the look of 'what?'.

He completely understood and went inside of your room. You were confused as to why the heck was he dressed?

"Want to go out?" He asks, placing his palms in his pockets.

You furrowed your eyebrows, surprised that he wasn't 'busy' nor locking himself. "Aren't you busy?" You answered with a question.

He shrugs. "Nah, I have two hours, come on." He said pulling your arm as usual.

You panicked, would this guy really want to go out when he was fully dressed and you aren't? You were wearing a tank top and shorts for pete's sake.

You pulled you arm from him and he looked at you surprised. "You prick! You really want me to go out in this?" You widened your eyes at him, pointing at your clothing which was embarrassing.

He straightened his posture and looks at you from top to bottom, as if he was evaluating you.

"It looks fine to me." He says in confusion.

You face-palmed yourself. Was this guy really dumb or what. Whatever it is you aren't going out in this state.

"Uh-uh, I ain't going out like this," You pushed him out of the room, "now sir please kindly leave the room, I need to change." You sarcastically said in a sing-song voice.

"I could just stay there you know." Jaemin smirks at you, raising his eyebrows in an up and down motion.

You glared at him.

"Okay okay! But make it quick!"

"Whatever!" You slammed the door in his face, quickly making your way to your closet.

Exactly as what you thought, everything still hasn't changed except for the fact that you two are together now.

You pulled out an t-shirt in frustration. Leaning against the closet you thought of ways to tell Jaemin.

Cause you weren't staying silent anymore, you were done.

This overthinking has to end.

"What do you mean?" Jaemin asks you, his eyebrows shot towards the ceiling.

You can't believe him.

"What do you mean you don't know Jaemin? Are you that oblivious to not see how frustrated am I?," you rage at him, jaws clenching, " Or or—you're pretending to not know anything?" You can't help but raise your voice at him.

Not caring about the people who had their eyes on the both of you.

Jaemin slightly bows his head as a way to apologize to the other customers who were also inside the establishment, hoping that they would start to mind their own business before he talks to you.

He looks at you in frustration, he was clearly holding himself from erupting like an volcano. It wouldn't be good if he as well would throw his anger.

"Y/n look, we can talk about this just please—" he looks around the people close to your table, "not here."

You massaged your temples, calming yourself cause you might not be able to the next time around.

You sighed. "I'm so fed up with this Jaemin. I don't want to think about it this way hence the reason why I stayed silent but—I can't take it anymore." You respond to him.

Jaemin remained silent, as if he was asking you the other for more details.

"I-i just don't know what to do about this anymore, I know you're busy and all that but at least—at least make time for me, please make me feel that i'm now your girlfriend Jaemin." You closed as you feel tears form around them.

Jaemin's face softened, he was guilty that he didn't know you were feeling this way. "Y-yn...you are my girlfriend." He mumbles.

"Well yeah?" You raised your eyebrow at him, "I don't feel like it. I still feel like im the y/n who was your bestfriend, not y/n as your girlfriend." You confessed to him.

He was shock at the very least. Jaemin was completely clueless, he might've gotten himself a bit too engrossed with the fact that the exams were coming and—set aside your relationship.

"Y/n I swear, that's not what it is—"

"But it is Jaemin," you cut him off, "I want to be treated as your girlfriend. I want to go to amazing dates, be gifted with flowers you know?"

"I-i thought you didn't like those?" Jaemin questions.

Must be because you were uncomfortable during that first date. But you doesn't mean that you didn't like it!

"I do Jaemin! I just to experience that I'm now your girlfriend, because from the looks and feels of it—it isn't." you repeat.

The both of you stayed silent for a while, not having any more to say.

You decided, it must be good for the both of you to breath out some air before talking about this once again.

You stood up, ready to leave that damned Mcdonald's when Jaemin grabbed your wrist.

"Where are you going?"

You showed him the time. "2 hours is up, you're busy right?" You grinned sarcastically at him, your smile immediately fading as you packed your things.

Jaemin was flustered, he didn't know what else to say but he was sure that the both of you need to talk this out.

"We need to talk about this Y/n." His grip on your wrist, insisting that you should stay.

You pulled your wrist from him, grabbing your purse.

"We'll talk when you finally realize that I'm now your girlfriend, not your best friend who you can treat like shit." You remarked, immediately leaving the place with fast steps.

Leaving Jaemin dumbfounded in his seat.

Previous Masterlist

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qyu-inactive · 4 years

Text

MY THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS ABOUT OUTTAKES 16-18.5 BECAUSE I HAVE SO MANY

We have been blessed with 3.5 glorious new parts to the wonderful Losty Aone/ Mountain Man Series by the wonderful, amazing, awe-inspiring @shhhlikeme and i am emotional and have many many feelings about it all.

Outtake 16

I love that we got to see this from the reeader’s point of view, it was nice to see our losty y/n and see how their feeling. It was a nice break from feeling sad about Aone’s broken heart.

This part made me laugh ahaha

After dating and breaking up with him, Aone had females constantly approaching him. A/N: Not constantly but it felt that way for you ofc lol

the jealously😂, the Author’s note too like “it wasnt like that at all” 😂 this emotional person (y/n) is just blowing up the situation.

and then this:

In other words: They want what you had.

i mean of course they would, Aone is the sweetest boy but only to someone he loves. Aone’s heart is too strong to let waver to someone knew so quick

This whole outtake all i could think about was that Y/n really needs to get back with her mountain man, first they want to break up so Aone finds someone new but then doesnt want him to find someone new. Like cleary y/n is not being honest with herself or Aone.

When they went to the library, ahhh y/n really just imagining the worst scnenarios in their head😂

“Oh,” your stomach flipped. “He looks so cute.” You put on a 🥺 face when you noticed how utterly adorable a standing Takanobu looked

🥺🥺🥺 Aone is always such a cutie, and y/n really broke this man’s heart😭 I know it was insecurites but still. These two are so in love but just wont get back together.

The outfit y/n is wearing😍 you always pick these really cute and sexy outfits and I appreciate y/ns confidence and style but it is not me 😂😂 but Aone thirsting over his girl tho, i would dress up like that if it meant getting looked by Aone like that 😂

I love Aone’s plan, like he is such a sweetheart and he’s making me all soft at all his effort to win his girl back🥺🥺

This outtake really gave up all the feels y/n is feeling with breaking up with Aone and I am enjoing it 😂. At the same time though I just want these to love birds to get back together ahhhhh.

One of the things I really love about this story is how strong the friendship is and how we see the outside characters really show how much they care. A lot of stories (like shojou, oh man you dont know how much shoujo manga ive read haha) just sideline their friends after the start talking to their love interest or they dont even have friends at all in the whole story. I really enjoyed seeing Katana be a voice of reason in our losty’s life. And of course the K_nji’s being our boy Aone’s best friends.

Outtake 17

okay we starting with the real friends the K_nji’s warning our boy Aone about the situation. I love them and how much they care 😂. They can be dumbasses but still, I appreciate their effort.

The University—our University— sent her a uniform that’s a size or two too small.

Does this mean they’re going to the same university? or am I reading too much into it? It might have been mentioned before but I cant remember off the top of my head. Also Aone really living his best life and his worst life rn 😂😂 like he gets to see his girl in a super tight cheer leading uniform and spend one on one time with her but he cant do anything about his desires. His confidence tho haha “I’ve seen Y/N in a cheerleading uniform before” not like this you havent😏

Aone Takanobu can truly say—if he could speak—that he will never even question Futakuchi again.

Again I just really love their friendship, parts like this really get me 😂😂😂

When y/n took out Aone’s jacket automatically🥺🥺 my hearttttt, and how long Aone’s jacket is on them🥺🥺 this whole part made me so softtt. Like imagine wearing his jacket🥺🥺 it would be so comfy and warm.

There are so many golden lines I loved from this part, but Aone’s spank bank is just a phrase I wasnt expectng to read but it is gold. Im sure his bank is full and loaded😂

Then some random gross guy comes up to y/n, like the audacity of this guy.

He had such a disgusting grin on his face

🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮 this guy can back offfff.

I really love when Aone comes in to protect the reader🥺🥺 he’s not the iron wall for nothing too.

Your knight has arrived. Your ex-knight. ☹️

and then you go and hurt me again😭😭

I really wanted Aone to just kick a dude in the chest, like step the fuck off 😂😂.

“Take one more step toward her.” Aone growled in the smoothest voice.

“I dare you.” Aone added, for good measure.

Im absolutely swooning, Aoneeeeee🥺🥺🥺. And the fact that he wanted the reader to come with him so she wouldnt get anyone bothering her😭😭 he’s such a gentlemen. No one bothers Aone’s girl whose not his girl at the moment, especially guys who arent wanted

now onto the fun part of this outtake😏 I wasn’t expecting to see texts but it was definitely a nice addtion!! Our poor Aone soo horny and sweet, I dont know if the dead squirrels worked hahaha.

but he couldn’t help but wonder how he was going to edit all of this together in the time frame he promised he would with only one hand.

this went over my head when i read it the first time omg😂😂😂 Im sure Aone can do it, he’s a very capable man. This whole section had me laughing but also feeling slightly bad for Aone, again his poor horny heart right now is conflicted but very much fed. Im glad he was able to get a break, I dont think his length could wait (im not used to using subtle language hahaha) anyway this whole part was fun to read.

Aone bit his juicy bottom lip,

I legit bit my lip just before reading this part😂

Outtake 18 & 18.5

Now we’re hitting the climax!! (after Aone just hit his climax and is about to hit again😗)

—who imo really should return to their own homes now but would rather not—

I mean do these two even have their own homes anymore😂, theyre basically apart of the Aone family now. Family who also understand when to leave their horny pal alone for time being.

OKAY ONTO THE IMPORTANT PART!!! AHHHHHHHH.

“Aone-senpai, do you even have snapchat?!”

“Obviously not.” Kenji answered for his friend, being snappy.

“WELL HE SHOULD GET IT BECAUSE I SAW—“

Did Kanji see Y/N and Takeru?????? I also cant believe I learnt Takeru was a third year from this series, I always thought he was a second year for some reason. I think cos he was ennoshita’s rival. not important rn lmao

“—because Aone-senpai is jacking off again. It makes you feel lighter, and happier—so that’s why,”

this boy, there are some things you just shouldnt say out loud. Some things can be left unsaid (not like im blunt with my friends sometimes haha but still)

When Kenji had found out about why y/n dumped Aone😭😭😭😭 I’m glad he found out earlier then Aone, I wouldnt have wanted him to yell at the reader again.

Anyone that can do that, be so selfless—is good enough for his best friend.

🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

“I can tell its her because that’s your sweater she’s wearing. Right? It says Takanobu on the back, and I remember seeing Y/N steal it out of your bag after practice once.”

🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺these parts really just made me soft. like the fact that y/n still had the jacket and wanted to wear it out. and the absolute coincedence that they were in the same cinema as Aone.

“Y/N.—Sh-She-She is wearing my attire. What does that mean?”

Yeah, big guy.

Yeah, you have a chance.

Y/N still has a little….tiny bit of feelings for you

YES YES YES FINALLY , I wanted to cry here😭😭 AND THEN KENJI CONFIRMED IT ALL AND AONE THE MAN WENT AND TRIED TO GET HIS GIRL. THIS REALLY IS THE DRAMATIC PART IN THE MOVIE. AND THEN THIS [redacted] TAKERU CAME AND AHHHHH

(Aone would know that face, he only saw it everyday he’s looked in the mirror for the past 3 years)

Absolutely dead. All hope—gone.

You make me happy and then just rip out my heart like 2 minutes later. I was going from crying happy tears to sad tears in like a heartbeat.

ALSO YOU DONT KNOW HOW UPSET I WAS WHEN I GOT TO THE END OF PART 18 I DIDNT REALISE THERE WAS 18.5 AND WAS AFRAID THAT THIS WAS IT AHHHHHH. I THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO PLAY WITH MY FEELINGS THEN JUST LEAVE.

“I’m worried about you.” She finished, looking more serious than you’ve ever seen her.

y/n really has some good friends with her🥺

uhhh then Takeru comes in, I dont really hate him but no one stands in between our losties love, they deserve each other and no one can stand between them.

“But, tonight, if you need a shoulder to cry on, I’m just one theatre over… Okay? I have a pretty comfortable shoulder, so just text me.”

Okay this was pretty nice of Takeru, like cheesy but at least he cares and isnt staring at y/n like a peace of meat he wants to devour...

You sent it. Received a response within seconds saying he was on his way.

This boy, hes got a good heart but this isn’t your story bud, im sorry.

There! Kenji-san and Koganagewa-san, two males who were looking at you and Takeru as if you two were the villains in the movie that just popped out of the screen.

if this doesnt go well these two seem like they’re going to fight y/n outside the cinema😭😂 I couldnt imagine getting death stares from the K_njis especially after hurting Aone basically twice now.

Finding HIM was all that mattered.

OKAY THIS WHOLE PART, LIKE YES GO GET YOUR MAN PLEASE. LIKE Y/N CANT JUST LEAVE THIS RIGHT HERE LIKE THIS.

white hair visible only because his head was down, forehead kissing the steering wheel, his shoulders vibrating slightly because he is crying. It’s him.

I cant take anymore sad Aone😭😭 He needs the biggest hug and his girl to be his girl again. He has gone through so much.

“Kenji-san, please leave me—““Not Justin Bieber look-alike!”

I cant with the Justin Bieber look-alike. 😂😂

Im just going to talk about my feelings for this part, but the whole confesson. I felt like crying, i feel like crying now reading it😭 it was just so beautiful. Like y/n explaing everything and saying Aone is the only man she’ll ever love. Throughout the series we really go to understand Aone’s feelings so deeply and how passionate he is but we didnt really get to see how y/n felt as much so reading this made me happy for Aone for the fact that his girl loves him as much as he loves her. They really were lost for each other, lost with out each other, but together they were

Found.

okay maybe im tearing up now😭😭

One more marathon to go and our happy couple can live happily. The fact that this story is nearly over is a little sad but I’m happy our losties found each other. Im thinking since the next parts will be the last I’ll talk about overall themes I liked and my favourite moments as well.

#shhhlikeme #Losty Aone #Losty mountain man series #this took longer then i expected but i can finally post it!!!!

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jungkookiebus · 5 years

Text

Chemistry | knj

This is part of the BSC 1st Anniversary Drabble Request Exchange!!

Scenario: hybrid au + Namjoon + hybrid him and hybrid reader go to a school for hybrids, they’re vice president and president and maybe they both have a crush on the other but dont know about the other’s crush (some jealousy would be cool 🥰 thanksss 💜) Word count: 3.6k Pairing: hybrid!Namjoon x hybrid!reader Warnings: unprotected sex (stay safe!), little bit of ol’ dirty talk

You pulled the poster down angrily as your tail twitched furiously behind you. Ears laid flat, you stood, fuming, in the middle of the hallway.

“____?” Haeun asked, nervously. “Everything okay?”

“Absolutely not.”

Haeun, being a bunny hybrid, was timid in comparison to your feline attitude. You were the only panther hybrid in your school, and everyone was afraid of you. You weren’t sure why, but that was just how the gavel fell. Haeun had been your friend since childhood, enduring the hardships of being hybrids together. Even now, hybrids were segregated to their own schools.

You were currently in the running for senior class president with your arch enemy, Namjoon, a wolf hybrid. You had been at odds for years, vying to be on top of your class and each time he seemed to get the best of you, even though you were equally matched.

“Why does he feel the need to try for everything I want?!” You crumpled the paper in your hands and threw it into the nearest trashcan.

“I think he knows it gets to you,” Haeun interjected.

“Of course, he knows it gets to me. Smug jerk.”

You spotted him across the cafeteria laughing amongst the rest of the baseball team and sneered at his stupid, boyish smile. For someone so cute, he was the most annoying.

“I’m getting this.”

The next week called for a student council meeting of the current board and to establish rules and school functions promoting the election. You crossed the mostly vacant room and planted yourself in a desk closest to the windows, hoping to avoid talking to anyone. You were staring out of the window waiting for the others to arrive when you felt the downy swish of a tail brush against your arm. Before you even turned your head, you were painfully aware of who had just sat next to you.

“_______,” his smooth voice swept across your mind like rain.

Twisting in your seat and narrowing your eyes, you flattened your ears and looked at him through pierced eyes.

“Namjoon,” you said with a snarl.

“You’re cute when you’re pissed.” You knew he was messing with you, egging you on and trying to get a rise from you.

Your ears perked back up and your tail wrapped around your midriff as you turned back towards the windows.

“Hey, come on, it was just a joke. How about we try getting along for once?”

He reached out to touch your arm and you immediately withdrew and snarled at him.

“Not likely, Namjoon.”

His eyebrows rose in curiosity, but he didn’t seem deterred by your behavior.

“You don’t scare me.”

“What?”

“Everyone is afraid of you. You keep up this façade,” he said gesturing towards you, “but you’re not as scary as you look or Haeun wouldn’t be friends with you.”

“What do you know?”

“I’ve known Haeun for years and she’s not friends with just anyone.”

“You don’t know me.”

“I’d like to.”

“No thanks.”

“Suit yourself,” he said as he settled back into his seat, tail swishing lazily across the floor.

The rest of the weeks were pure torture as the election went on. Polls were not in your favor and you were trying your hardest to at least win something over Namjoon for once. No matter how much you smiled, talked to people, or tried your best to win them over, your numbers were not going up. Wholesome, all-around Namjoon was stealing your votes and you couldn’t understand how.

One day, you decided to approach him as he walked to his car.

“Hey, Namjoon!”

He turned in surprise at the sound of your voice and smiled widely.

“Is the pretty panther talking to me for once?”

“Cut the shit. How are you doing it?”

“Doing what?”

“Getting all of the votes.”

“Uh, well, same as you, talking to people and working events.”

“But you’re winning.”

“Look, ______,” he said with a sigh, “I’m going to break it to you, you’re not the nicest person.”

You looked at him, affronted.

“Okay, fuck you.” You turned to walk away, but he quickly grabbed your wrist and you felt the goosebumps rise on your skin.

Turning back, he was looking at you seriously.

“I’m trying to help you.”

“Forget I asked,” you said walking away. Namjoon didn’t call out, nor did he follow you.

Your forehead hit your desk with a thud as the results were announced over the intercom. Namjoon had gotten president and you had gotten vice. Yet again, Namjoon had beaten you. Haeun chewed on her bottom lip but didn’t say a word because she knew better than to try to comfort you. You were short-tempered and your feline instincts were to act in disdain and anger.

“This isn’t going to affect me,” you said as you rose from your desk.

“Wait, you’re not mad?” Haeun was quickly following behind as you made your way to first period.

“I’m fuming.”

Haeun stopped in her tracks and didn’t follow you further as you walked to chem. What sucked about all of this was that you had first period with him, and he was your lab partner. The universe was a cruel mistress when it came to your fate. You slid onto your stool next to him without a sideways glance as you dropped your bag on the floor.

“Congratulations.” His deep voice resounded in your ears.

“Same to you,” you said still looking ahead to the front of the class.

“Going to the dance this weekend?”

You shrugged, not really wanting to have casual conversation with him right now.

“Maybe I’ll see you there?”

“Maybe.”

“Absolutely not,” you said as Haeun held the black dress out to you.

“It’s hot.”

“It’s egregious.”

“You’ll make Namjoon look twice.”

You did a double take as you stared at her with wide eyes.

“Excuse me?”

“Oh, come on, _______,” she said flopping down on your bed, “I’ve seen the way you look at him.”

You sputtered as you tried to quickly defend yourself, not making it look better.

“I do not like him. We hate each other, why would you say that?” You were pacing around your room, flailing your arms and all Haeun could do was smirk and lie back on the bed, watching you flounder.

“Look at yourself, you’re so flustered you can barely talk.”

“Okay, he’s cute, but that’s it.”

“Suit yourself, but you should really wear that dress.”

Haeun gave you a smug look as you resigned and walked to the bathroom, dress slung over your shoulder.

“I feel ridiculous,” you said as you walked into the crowded gym. You pulled at the hem of the dress, willing it to magically become longer as you slouched.

“Stand up straight, you look like a sick giraffe.” Haeun wore a cute pink dress that accented her equally cute personality. Her soft, furry ears glistened in the low lights of the gym and her nose twitched excitedly.

You stood to full height, a good foot over Haeun, and glanced around the gym. You spotted Namjoon right away with a pretty junior you recognized but couldn’t bother to remember her name. You felt a flush course through you that felt oddly like jealously, but you quickly dampened it.

“Let’s get a drink,” you said pulling Haeun along behind you.

The crowd parted as you made your way through, receiving ogling looks from both boys and girls alike.

“Told you that dress was a good idea,” you heard behind you.

“Shut up, Haeun.”

You heard her laugh as you reached the table, grabbing two cups and handing one to her.

“Prince charming is coming this way.”

Before you could turn around you heard his low voice behind you.

“Well, hello, Miss Vice President.”

His eyes raked from the tips of your toes to the tips of your ears.

“Can we help you?”

“I was just coming to say hi.” The small cat hybrid beside looked at you with disgust, but he wasn’t looking at her.

“Hello and goodbye. Looks like your date is pissed.”

Namjoon looked at the girl beside him like he had just remembered she was there. “Ah, well, enjoy your evening ladies.” Haeun nodded and raised her cup as he walked away.

“He just eye fucked you hard.”

Your drink almost came out of your nose. “God you’re crude.”

She shrugged before continuing to drink and scanned the dance floor.

“I’m gonna go see if Yoongi wants to dance,” she said setting her cup down.

“The fox hybrid? That’s, like, a natural enemy to you.”

“Oh my God, I can’t with you, bye.” And she was off before you could protest, basically hopping as he sidled up next to Yoongi.

This night couldn’t get any worse for you. You quickly dipped into the shadows of the perimeter of the gym and snuck out the doors leading to the empty corridors of your school. Why you had agreed to come to this stupid dance was beyond you, but it was expected of the class vice president after all. You ducked into the all too familiar chemistry classroom you had every first period. Sighing, you walked to your normal table, sitting down to breathe. That was when you heard the door click shut softly behind you. Hair raised, you turned in the direct of the sound only to find Namjoon looking at you curiously.

“Are you following my every move now?” you asked him, annoyance evident in your voice.

He held his hands out defensively as his ears laid back.

“Whoa, no, I was coming to check on you.”

“I don’t need saving.”

“I’m not saving you.”

You both stared each other down for a few seconds too long.

“Why are you here then?”

He rubbed the back of his neck nervously. “Like I said, I was checking on you.”

“Thanks, now you can go,” you said turning back around in the stool.

A few seconds later and you felt the ghost of his breath against your neck, causing every hair on your body to stand on end.

“You look really good in that dress,” he whispered.

You gulped audibly as his fingers ghosted up your arm and came to rest on your shoulder. You couldn’t help the shiver that ran through your body and he noticed right away.

“Am I reading the signs wrong or are just as into me as I am into you?”

Your mouth felt parched, as if you hadn’t had water in years. Was this really happening right now? You were supposed to hate Namjoon. Your hands gripped the edge of the table nervously as you laughed; the sound coming from your mouth very unconvincing.

“I-I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you stammered. Your tail flicked nervously behind you, brushing against his legs.

His hand came around to cup your jaw so that he could turn your face towards him.

“I think you know exactly what I’m talking about,” he said as he placed a small kiss to the corner of your mouth.

Involuntarily, your mouth fell open and he turned his head to fully envelop yours with his, tongue immediately moving against yours. He moaned as he got the first taste and he was not disappointed; the sweet, tangy flavor of the punch was still on your tongue as he flicked against it. You turned in the stool and grasped the lapels of his blazer as you pulled him closer to you, spreading your legs as much as you could in the dress and pressing him against you.

“Feisty, huh?” he laughed against your lips.

“Just shut up,” you said kissing him once more. His hand traveled the length of your thigh but stopped at the hem of your dress. Throwing all caution to the wind you spread your legs further, causing the dress to ride up as well. He squeezed your inner thigh as his lips moved to your neck, your head moved to the side to give him more area. Brushing his fingers lightly against the fabric of your panties, he sucked and bit into the skin below your ear.

“God, I want to fuck you,” he moaned.

“Then do it.”

He seemed surprised as he pulled back to look at you.

“Don’t act like there hasn’t been sexual tension between us.”

He looked at you as if to say you weren’t wrong. Maintaining eye contact and quicker than you were able to notice, he had two fingers shoved into the side of your panties and into your awaiting cunt. You had already started to get wet, but this sealed the deal as he pushed his fingers in further, watching your reaction as you gripped the table with one hand while the other was still buried in the fabric of his blazer.

“Fuck, Namjoon, warn a girl.”

“I wanted to see your face.”

“What…w-what about y-your date?” You were finding it hard to form words as he pumped his fingers in you as he lazily brushed his thumb over your clit.

“Oh, her? She’ll be okay.”

Only the after hour emergency lights lit the room and Namjoon loved the way he could see your face half-shrouded in darkness, almost as if he were watching a noir film play out in front of him. Your eyelashes fluttered against your cheeks and casted soft shadows.

“God, you’re beautiful,” he said as his lips brushed along your cheekbone.

Your ears twitched in embarrassment as your tail came up to wrap around your waist. His other hand grabbed it softly and pushed it away as you relaxed.

“Don’t be so tense.”

You sighed as his lips came to yours, fingers still working you open slowly. His lips were gentle, soft against yours and you wanted to fall into the feeling forever. In the back of your mind you wondered why you hadn’t given in to this type of pleasure sooner.

“How do you want me to fuck you?” he whispered.

Your eyes rolled back, and your cunt clenched down around his fingers as he asked you the question.

“I don’t care,” you said breathlessly.

“Oh, come on,” he tutted, “use your words.”

He curled his fingers upwards against your g-spot and you gasped loudly; the sound seemed to echo in the empty room. Your palms began to sweat as you grasped at the slick surface of the lab table, thighs quivering, and your feet slipped off the rung of the stool.

“I want you to bend me over this table so that every time we have class, I think about it.”

Namjoon groaned and you felt his cock, hard in his pants, brush past your knee.

“Fuck, if I knew you had such a dirty mouth on you, I would have tried to fuck you sooner.”

He pulled his fingers out of you, grabbed your wrist, and jerked you upwards into a standing position. His lips were on yours once more as he pulled your tight dress up past your hips as you shimmied your underwear off yourself. You fumbled with his belt for a few seconds before you were pushing his pants down.

“Wow, no underwear?” you asked as his cock sprung free immediately.

“Didn’t feel the need,” he purred.

You grabbed his cock in your hand and reveled in the growl burning at the back of his throat. Just as languid as he, you worked your hand over his cock until he pushed into you. His hand came up to your throat as kissed you in a rush, tongue exploring as he pushed you against the lab table.

“Turn around,” he demanded while grabbing your hips, helping you along.

He pushed, hard, into the middle of your back, forcing your upper half onto the table as he spread your legs for a wider stance. Holding the base of his cock, he rubbed it between your folds, gathering the wetness that was now threatening to drip down your thighs. You moaned at the feeling of him rubbing against you and you wiggled your ass to hurry him up.

“I can’t wait to be inside of this pretty pussy,” he said bending over you, hand on the table beside your head, and slowly thrusting against you. “You know how many times I’ve thought of taking you in various places around school?”

Every inch of your skin was aflame as if a fire had been lit from within. A mix of embarrassment and arousal rushed through you like a wave; he was being so open with you and you weren’t sure how to respond.

“Dogs aren’t supposed to like cats,” you said looking at him through your peripheral.

He laughed as he bent down some more, nose in your hair, sniffing lightly before rubbing his face against yours.

“Well, I like this particular kitten.”

You both groaned in unison as he entered you. The stretch was far from uncomfortable; this was the best you had felt in ages. His hand was still planted firmly on the table as he began to fuck you with purpose. You felt his tail twitch and brush against your calves at each thrust. His face was in your hair once more, inhaling deeply as he moaned.

“You smell so fucking good. I’ve always wanted to be this close to you. Did you know you give off the most intoxicating pheromones?” His thrusts slowed but hit deep. Your eyes rolled back as he brushed against your g-spot.

Your hands slid across the smooth tabletop as you tried to hold yourself; your palms leaving sweaty prints in their wake. Namjoon lifted your right leg up behind your knee to deepen his already dangerous thrusts; it was almost like he had known your body forever.

“I need you to fuck me harder,” you begged.

Namjoon looked around him and to one of the lower tables that was wheelchair accessible.

“Move,” he demanded as he slipped out of you and pushed you towards the table. He guided you to lay flat on your back, legs hanging from the table. He positioned himself between your legs, grabbed your ankles and pushed until the heels of your feet were on the edge. He wasted no time before he was sliding back inside of you once more, hands back on your ankles as he pulled your legs to his shoulders. You cried out as he thrust faster, balls slapping against you.

“Is this what you wanted?” he asked through gritted teeth.

You tried to grab onto something, anything, but all you were hitting was a discarded textbook and the knobs of the built-in sink.

“Fuck.” You felt as if you were gasping for air, your body trying desperately to keep up with what was happening.

“Touch yourself.”

You popped three fingers into your mouth before bringing them down to your clit and rubbed fast circles. Your back arched off the cool tabletop as he gripped tighter to your legs and buried his cock as far as it could go.

“I’m gonna come.” You were practically in tears. Namjoon was watching you in such sharp focus that everything else around him seemed to fall away. In that moment, neither of you were enemies nor being two different species of hybrid mattered. Your ears were flat against your dark hair and you were the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. You clenched down hard around him as you came, mouth falling open and then closed again as you ground your teeth together to stay quiet. He fucked you through your orgasm and slowly pulled out of you.

“Look at that, you creamed all over my cock, baby,” he said as he started to pump himself, using your cum as lube.

You sat up on your elbows to witness the mess you had made before looking at Namjoon who was completely fucked out and fucking himself into this own hand. You reached forward, grabbed him behind his head and brought his mouth down to yours in a hard kiss that was less methodical and more chaos. Your post orgasm high had you moaning into the kiss as Namjoon’s hand worked over himself faster and faster. Images of you coming around him spurred his orgasm to a quick peak as he came, hot, on your cunt and thighs. His moans came out almost as a deep growl as his cum leaked down your skin and he backed up; steps almost faltering.

“Fuck,” he laughed. “I never thought this would happen.”

You sat up, reaching into a drawer on the table that you knew held paper towels. “Yea, well, neither did I.”

Namjoon grabbed the roll from you, pulling several off before wiping you down.

“So where do we go from here?” he asked.

“Back to the gym?”

He laughed once more as he gathered your belongings. “You know what I mean.”

“Oh, back to being mortal enemies I guess.” You pulled your underwear back on as he did up his belt.

“_______,” he said, exasperated, “I’m being serious.”

“I like you, okay? As much as I hate to fucking admit it, I like you.” A triumphant grin spread across his face at your admission. “But I’m not jumping into this.”

“Uh…I don’t know what you call this,” he said gesturing between the both of you, “but I think we already did.”

“Relationship wise, you goose.”

“You know, I’ve never met a goose hybrid.”

You slapped his shoulder as you pushed your way past him and to the door. You pulled it open and turned to look at him, hand grasping the wood. You made direct eye contact with him and then looked over towards the table before looking at him once more.

“See you in chemistry on Monday?” you asked rhetorically as you walked out, leaving a smiling Namjoon behind.

#BSCproject #btssmutclub #BTS smut #bts au #bts scenarios #bts imagines #hybrid!namjoon #namjoon x reader #nonidol!au #namjoon #bts #drabble exchange #BSC 1st anniversary drabble request exhange #hybrid!au #bts hybrid

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she-wolf-of-highgarden · 6 years

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I dont get all of this Arya-doesn’t-care-about-sansa-stuff. Arya thinks about Sansa more than any other Stark family member and on top of that she thinks that most highly of her. Ned mentions Sansa 40 times, Cat mentions her 40 times, Bran thinks of her 9 times, Jon mentions her 12 times, and Arya mentions Sansa 65 times. And you know what? Not all 65 times is an insult to Sansa.

“Sansa had everything. Sansa was two years older; maybe by the time Arya had been born, there had been nothing left. Often it felt that way. Sansa could sew and dance and sing. She wrote poetry. She knew how to dress. She played the high harp and the bells. Worse, she was beautiful. Sansa had gotten their mother's fine high cheekbones and the thick auburn hair of the Tullys.” - Arya I, AGoT

“So the singer played for her, so soft and sad that Arya only heard snatches of the words, though the tune was half-familiar. Sansa would know it, I bet. Her sister had known all the songs, and she could even play a little, and sing so sweetly. All I could ever do was shout the words.” - Arya IV, ASoS

“No one ransomed the northmen, though. One fat lordling haunted the kitchens, Hot Pie told her, always looking for a morsel. His mustache was so bushy that it covered his mouth, and the clasp that held his cloak was a silver-and-sapphire trident. He belonged to Lord Tywin, but the fierce, bearded young man who liked to walk the battlements alone in a black cloak patterned with white suns had been taken by some hedge knight who meant to get rich off him. Sansa would have known who he was, and the fat one too, but Arya had never taken much interest in titles and sigils. Whenever Septa Mordane had gone on about the history of this house and that house, she was inclined to drift and dream and wonder when the lesson would be done.” - Arya VII, ACoK

If Arya cared about none of that, why would she think about it? Why wouldn’t she just blow it off and say it was stupid. Who cared that Sansa could do all that? Arya does, Arya cares a lot. She is jealous.

And if she dislikes and looks down on Sansa so much, why miss her?

“Leaving King's Landing was easy, just like he'd said. The Lannister guardsmen on the gate were stopping everyone, but Yoren called one by name and their wagons were waved through. No one spared Arya a glance. They were looking for a highborn girl, daughter of the King's Hand, not for a skinny boy with his hair chopped off. Arya never looked back. She wished the Rush would rise and wash the whole city away, Flea Bottom and the Red Keep and the Great Sept and everything, and everyone too, especially Prince Joffrey and his mother. But she knew it wouldn't, and anyhow Sansa was still in the city and would wash away too. When she remembered that, Arya decided to wish for Winterfell instead.” - Arya I, ACoK

“Arya sipped at her tankard cautiously, between spoonfuls of pie still warm from the oven. Her father sometimes let them have a cup of beer, she remembered. Sansa used to make a face at the taste and say that wine was ever so much finer, but Arya had liked it well enough. It made her sad to think of Sansa and her father.” - Arya II, ACoK

“Arya had not known her brother was so near. Riverrun was much closer than Winterfell, though she was not certain where it lay in relation to Harrenhal. I could find out somehow, I know I could, if only I could get away. When she thought of seeing Robb's face again Arya had to bite her lip. And I want to see Jon too, and Bran and Rickon, and Mother. Even Sansa . . . I'll kiss her and beg her pardons like a proper lady, she'll like that.” - Arya VII, ACoK

“Needle was Robb and Bran and Rickon, her mother and her father, even Sansa. Needle was Winterfell's grey walls, and the laughter of its people. Needle was the summer snows, Old Nan's stories, the heart tree with its red leaves and scary face, the warm earthy smell of the glass gardens, the sound of the north wind rattling the shutters of her room. Needle was Jon Snow's smile. He used to mess my hair and call me "little sister," she remembered, and suddenly there were tears in her eyes.” - Arya II, AFfC

Also we know from Sansa’s TWoW chapter that pre-asoiaf Arya, at some point, tried to follow she and Jeyne around. Again, why? Why follow someone around you dislike so much? Why not follow around one of the boys?

“They made a race of it, dashing headlong across the yard and past the stables, skirts flapping, whilst knights and serving men alike looked on, and pigs and chickens scattered before them. It was most unladylike, but Alayne sound found herself laughing. For just a little while, as she ran, she forget who she was, and where, and found herself remembering bright cold days at Winterfell, when she would race through Winterfell with her friend Jeyne Poole, with Arya running after them trying to keep up.” - Alayne, TWoW

Arya’s big issue is that she cannot separate what her mother and septa thought of her and what Sansa thought of her. Sansa is not always kind, but it is still clear from the argument about whether or not to go to the Queen’s carriage she wants to connect with her sister. Sansa tells Arya that she should have gone to the tourney instead of dance lessons. Sansa is the one who tells Arya about Gregor Clegane, which sticks out because she uses the word “confide”. These girls have their issues, but Arya’s is not that she really thinks Sansa is lesser than. Arya thinks that she, herself, is lesser than and needs to take time to find out how Sansa actually feels instead of going straight to “she is looking down on me” and getting defensive.

#Arya Stark #Sansa Stark #A Song of Ice and Fire #asoiaf #dont even mention the show to me

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jungblue · 7 years

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So I’m trying to lose my virginity with my boyfriend, but every time he tries to enter me it really hurts. We’ve tried to use lube, finger, and try comfortable positions but it’s still painful. WHAT SHOULD I DO I STILL WANT THE DIc™️ BUT I DONT WANT THE PAIN YA FEEL

THE LAST SENTENCE JXXJASDL LOL. but yes i feel, and hmm even with lots of lube and everything? the only other thing that i could think of would be that you aren’t as aroused as you could be. add some more foreplay and it might relax you some more down there. though for your first time while it definitely shouldn’t hurt, it might feel uncomfortable. my first time didn’t hurt but it was sort of a weird feeling

Anonymous said: That’s probably not inappropriate, but it’s bad/wrong if I have no sex drive? Like, I’m horny just when I’m on my period, but not THAT horny to do something about it, lmao. And I don’t enjoy masturbating/having sex/watching porn either. I don’t judge anyone for that, but it doesn’t feel like my thing. Like, once or twice in a few months would work, but I’d have to force myself in order to do it regulary.

it’s alright if that’s the case! even if you never had the desire to have sex that’s still perfectly alright. you just have to do whatever you’re comfortable with and whatever is the the most enjoyable for you!

Anonymous said: Whats something that can make u buss a nut in like 10 seconds

absolutely nothing except for my trusty vibrator lmao

Anonymous said: I’ve tried to masturbate before, literally earlier oops maybe too tmi but like I can’t actually finish? I get too sensitive or worn out I think I’m just inexperienced really badly but yeah it sucks man it happens every time

it takes some experimentation to figure out what works best for you. i’ve read like excerpts from various women about how their clitoris is too sensitive to be touched so they sort of have to feel around it? i personally don’t have that issue so i’m not highly knowledgeable on an alternative to that. but don’t get discouraged, it really just takes some playing around to find out what feels the best for you personally bc everyone is different

Anonymous said: Have you ever seen any bts look alike porn videos??

they’ve appeared on the dash over the years lol

Anonymous said: I’m the anon about the solo masturbation thing, I literally don’t know why but there is just something so amazing about it? And am I the only one that like honestly like I like it when they try to overstimulate themselves and their thighs are shaking and they like cry out??? AHHHHH I FEEL SO WEIRD YET I FEEL LIKE I FIT IN SO WELL HERE Hahahaha

Anonymous said: GUYS MOANING IS MY TURN ON HOLY HELLL!!! And he doesn’t even have to be loud you know what I mean? Just those barely audible sounds and when he’s trying to keep his mouth clamped shut he can’t help but have some response because it just feels so good, ESPECIALLY IF HE’s RIGHT NEXT TO YOUR EAR BITCH HOLY HELL

JXXSAHDJ NO YOU’RE NOT ALONE, MY FRIENDS :’))

Anonymous said: How about getting turned on watching a girl masturbate?

yess :’)) i think the bottom line is that i just enjoy the pleasure of others lmao

Anonymous said: So I’ve been hearing a lot of Kpop idols moans that sound like them but it’s not. I can’t seem to find any? Like where is this hidden treasure buried? Because I need it for my math project and it’s due like pretty soon. (A bitch is allowed to be thirsty)

Anonymous said: Is watching a guy jack off really that much of a turn on? I’ve never watched it since I didn’t think it was my kind of link but maybe I should start? Any recs?

lololol i mean i don’t have an recs to give bc they sort of just randomly appear on my dash from time to time. though i know there are tumblr blogs specifically geared towards gathering audio that sounds like the members in a sexual sense

Anonymous said:If ur still doing the tmi then great if not just ignore but anywho… i feel like its not supposed to be weird but im making it weird by thinking too much about it… is it ok to masturbate more than 5x a week? Or am i considered addicted to it? Idek anymore???🙈

no you’re good lol. things are really only considered an addiction if it interferes with your daily life. so as long as you aren’t like skipping class to go to the bathroom bc you physically can’t contain yourself i’d say you’re fine

Anonymous said: Is it bad that I want to see Yoongi in a pink little dress blushing, looking so cute? That’s not bad, right? I’m a good person (Kinda).

i wouldn’t say it’s bad. i mean didn’t we all fall for yoonji :’))

Anonymous said: Does anyone know how to get rid of stretch marks on your ass?

i believe that there are various lotions that can lighten or darken the areas depending on your skin tone

Anonymous said: you can switch the filters on pornhub to only show amateur/homemade stuff and it’s great 👌

uphold amateur porn!!!! it’s superior!!

#thank you all for participating in my tmi tuesday yesterday lol #blue blabs

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bxcketbarnes · 7 years

Text

Dance With Me

Pairing: Stiles Stilinski x Reader

Author: @ninja-stiles

Words: 3631

Request: Hello! Idk if u do requests based on songs but 'It won't Kill ya' by the chainsmokers is amazing and I just pictured this scene like it's that Party at Derek's house with the neon lights, and all that y/n can think about is dancing with Stiles but cant bc they're best friends and that'd weird, she has a huge crush on him, kinda angsty in the middle but fluff af in the end bc obvsly Stiles likes her back?? It's ok if u dont do it tho, ily anyways ♡♡ keep doing awesome writing by anonomoose!

Author’s Note: I thought this was cute. I hope you think so as well! Thanks to my amazing friend @mf-despair-queen for proofreading this for me!!

Word going around is that Danny’s throwing a party over at Derek’s loft, which I’m assuming he doesn’t know about, and I really want to go, especially with Stiles. Unfortunately, Stiles is having a bit of a rough patch right now, along with Scott and Allison. The three of them were kind of like surrogate sacrifices to find out where their parents had be taken to, and since then, they all have been having nightmares, sleep paralysis, and hallucinations. I’ve been debating with myself all day long to see if I should ask Stiles to come to this party, maybe it’ll help him relax a little bit. I saw Lydia at her locker, checking her makeup in the little mirror that’s on the back of the locker door. Stiles didn’t notice that I had stopped walking, so I walked over to Lydia, feeling a little nervous about asking for her opinion.

“Hi, Lydia,” I smiled and she looked at me through the tiny mirror, giving me a small smile. She finished applying her lipstick, closing her locker softly before turning around to face me.

“Hey, Y/N. Whatcha need?” She questioned and my eyes widened, surprised that she knew I wanted something. Lydia chuckled, closing my mouth that I didn’t realize had opened. “Yes, I knew you wanted to ask me something.”

“U-Um, I wanted your opinion on something,” I started, looking behind me, seeing Stiles talking to Scott, his eyes glancing towards me for a split second before looking away. “You heard about Danny’s party, right?” I asked and she nodded her head, twirling a piece of her hair. “Well, I wanted to ask Stiles if he wanted to go, to get him to relax a bit, but I don’t know if it’s a good idea or not,” I muttered, blushing a bit as she smirked, laying a hand on my shoulder.

“Aw sweetie, you have a crush on him,” Lydia squealed and my cheeks darkened, looking to the floor as I nodded. “I think you should totally ask him, it’ll be a nice way to get close to each other, just don’t drink too much, because you’ll probably end up doing something you’ll regret,” She smiled and I nodded my head, a smile on my lips.

“O-Okay, I’m gonna do it. Right now,” I boldly stated, pushing some of my hair out of my face, turning around, facing them. I bit my lip, looking back at Lydia. “How does my makeup look?” I questioned and she gave me a thumbs up, pushing me in their direction. I let out a breath, shaking off the nerves as I sauntered towards them, feeling my heartbeat faster. I glanced at Scott, seeing the same smirk on his face as he told Stiles he was heading to lunch, leaving him alone and I became a little more nervous.

“H-Hey, Y/N,” Stiles stuttered, giving me a small wave before pulling me into a hug. “Why didn’t you tell me you were going to talk to Lydia? I would’ve went with you,” I bit my lip, shrugging as I played with the tips of my fingers, not actually speaking a word yet. “You okay?” He asked, laying a hand on my arm.

“Y-Yeah, sorry. I was lost in my thoughts. Um, I wanted to ask you something though,” I paused as he nodded his head for me to continue, a grin on his beautiful lips. “I-I was wondering if maybe, you wanted to go to Danny’s party? A-As friends, of course,” I muttered, mentally facepalming, taking my lip between my teeth. Stupid. Stupid. His cheeks turned pink as he scratched the back of his neck and I begin to frown, thinking he’s gonna say no.

“I-I mean, I usually don’t go to parties, because I’m never invited, but yeah. I definitely want to go,” He smiled down at me and my frown turned into a smile, wrapping my arms around his neck, hugging him tightly. Stiles chuckled, wrapping his arms around my waist, resting his large hands on my lower back.

“T-This is great, oh my god. I can’t believe you said yes. Now, I have to go to the mall and find a cute outfit because I don’t have any cute party outfits and I need to do something with my hair an-,” I get cut off by Stiles placing his hand over my mouth, my eyes widened as I realized I was rambling. “Sohhfrryf,” I apologized against his hand as it muffled, not sounding like a word at all.

“It’s okay. God, I forget how much we’re alike in some ways,” He chuckles as we walked towards the cafeteria. I giggled, tucking a piece of hair behind my ear, biting my lip again. I’m in too deep.

I had texted Lydia and Allison, asking them if they would want to come with me to help find an outfit. I also wanted their fashion opinion, since I’m not exactly a fashion guru. The both agreed and Lydia offered to drive us, so here I am, sitting on my front step waiting for her and Allison to pull into my driveway. My phone begin to ring, snapping me from my thoughts and I dig through my purse, seeing Stiles calling me. I slide to the answer the call, pressing the phone to my ear. “Stiles? Hey, what’s up?”

“H-Hey, Y/N! Um, this is a bit hard to explain, but I-I can’t go to the party,” I frowned, my heart dropping into my stomach. I clear my throat, my vision becoming blurry as the tears pooled.

“O-Oh, okay. Um, okay,” I noticed Lydia’s car pulling into the driveway, wiping the tears from my cheeks. I noticed the frowns on their faces as they get out of the car. “I-It’s fine, Stiles. U-Um, I have to go though,” I whispered, my voice cracking a bit.

“A-Are you okay?” Stiles asked and I covered my mouth with my hand, trying not to let out a sob. So much for working up the courage to ask him… “Y/N?” He questioned, worry laced in his voice.

“I have to go, Stiles,” I muttered, hanging up the phone before he can say anything else. I put my phone back in my purse, running a hand through my hair as I let out a shaky breath. Why go to this party now? The girls sat down next to me, Allison rubbing my back as a few sobs escaped from my throat. “I feel so pathetic,” I whispered glancing at the two of them.

“You’re not pathetic, sweetie. You’re hurt because you like him, probably even love him,” Lydia mentioned, pushing the hair out of my face. “I’m going to assume he said he couldn’t go to the party?” She asked and I nodded my head.

“I thought, I really thought that he’d be excited to go, but I guess I misread everything. I know that he’s dealing with a lot of shit. I just wanted him to relax a bit,” I whispered, sniffling a bit.

“C’mon, maybe shopping can distract you for a bit,” Allison murmured, pulling me off the step, heading towards the car.

Stiles looked down at his phone, frowning as Scott walked into his room. He didn’t notice him walk in as he continued to be in thought, wondering why I had been so upset about him not going to this party.

“Dude? You okay?” Scott asked, Stiles’ head shooting up, looking at him. Stiles nodded his head, placing the phone on his bed as he rubbed his eyes, feeling tired. He hadn’t been getting much sleep lately since he can never figure out when he actually wakes up or is still dreaming, more like a nightmare though.

“Y-Yeah, I just got off the phone with Y/N and I think I made her upset,” He muttered, looking to the ground. Scott sat on the chair by Stiles’ desk, furrowing his eyebrows.

“Why do you think that?” Scott asked and Stiles looked up at him, tugging on his bottom lip with his teeth, letting out a sigh.

“Danny’s party is tomorrow night and I told you I’d help you guys with getting Kira’s phone, so I called her and told her that I couldn’t make it to the party,” Stiles looked back to the floor, tapping his foot as Scott got up, patting him on the back lightly.

“Kira and I could possibly do this without you, if you want to go with her,” Scott mentioned and Stiles shook his head before letting out a groan, rubbing his face with his massive hands.

“I have no idea what to do,” He sighed, looking down at his phone, seeing a picture of the two of us. Allison saw us outside where we go sometimes for lunch, by ourselves and Stiles had placed me on his lap, his arms wrapped around my waist as we were laughing about something. She sent me the photo to me that night and I awed at it, immediately sending it to Stiles.

“Just follow your heart, man,” Scott smiled.

Allison, Lydia, and I have been strolling through the mall going from store to store, trying to find something that I would like. My thoughts were still on Stiles, though. Did he not want to go with me anymore? Is he going with someone else? I let out a sigh, getting the girls’ attention as they turned around, giving me a look. I mutter an apology, walking in between them as we walked into Forever 21.

“I’m sorry guys. I promise, no more Stiles,” I smiled, linking my arms with the both of them as we made our way to the clothes racks. I took my bottom lip between my teeth, sifting through some of the clothes on the rack, no really liking any of them. I heard from someone at school saying that there’s going to be body painting, so I want something that’ll show a bit of skin. Lydia came up to me, holding a white lace bralette crop top and a pair of short shorts that are ripped under the pockets, handing them to me.

“This, this is gonna be perfect on you,” She beamed, leading me towards the dressing room, looking at the clothes in my hand. I walked into one of the dressing rooms, closing the door behind me, locking it. I undress, looking at myself in the mirror for a hot minute before putting on the shorts and top. Wow, I actually look good. I smiled at myself, looking at my ass in the shorts, approving. I heard Allison walk into the dressing room area, telling Lydia’s there’s a minor problem.

“What is it?” Lydia asked as I pressed my ear against the door, listening closely.

“Scott and Stiles are here,” Allison whispered and my eyes widened, opening the door, facing the two girls.

“They’re here? Right now?” I asked and Allison nodded her head as Lydia squealed, admiring the outfit I have on.

“Babe, you look so good!” Lydia mentioned, bringing me into a hug as Scott and Stiles showed up just outside the archway of the dressing room and Scott cleared his throat, the three of us glancing towards them. My breath hitched in my throat, seeing what Stiles was wearing, plaid shirt with a white undershirt and denim jeans, and he looks so, so good. I looked to the ground, tucking a piece of hair behind my ear, feeling his eyes on me.

“I-I’m gonna go change,” I whispered, walking back into the dressing room, hearing small talk from my friends on the other side of the door, before hearing nothing. They must’ve went back out. I took off the crop top, just as the door opened, Stiles walking in and closing the door behind him. I turned around, letting out a small gasp, covering chest with the top. “S-Stiles!”

“O-Oh god, I’m so sorry. I thought you would’ve been dressed by now,” He stuttered, closing his eyes, letting out a sigh. “Um, I wanted to apologize,” Stiles muttered as I slipped on my t-shirt, looking at him like he’s crazy.

“And you couldn’t wait until I was done getting dressed?” I questioned, narrowing my eyes at him as he peeked, seeing I was dressed, my arms crossed over my chest.

“I-I was being spontaneous?” He sounded unsure, blushing a bit, rubbing the back of his neck. “Like I said, I wanted to apologize for canceling on you,” He sat on the small bench as I sat down next to him, our legs touching slightly.

“I-It’s fine, Stiles. I told you it was fine,” I whispered, looking up at him and he glanced at me, frowning.

“It’s not though. I’m pretty sure I made you cry and I didn’t want that to happen. I hate when you cry and for me to be the person who did it, made me feel even worse.” He looked to the ground and I frowned, taking one of his hands in mine, playing with the tips of his fingers.

“I just wanted you to relax, Stiles. You’ve been under a lot of stress lately and I just wanted to help.” I smiled at him, leaning my head against his shoulder.

“That’s why, after I help Scott and Kira, I’m going straight to that party. Okay?” Stiles asked and I looked up at him, grinning. I nodded my head, leaning up, pressing my lips to his cheek before leaving the dressing room, looking back at him before leaving.

“I’ll see you there.” I bit my lip, walking out of the dressing room, a smile on my lips. I walked towards Lydia. “I’m gonna go buy these,” I mentioned, smiling as she nodded her head, a grin on her lips.

I had called Lydia in dire need of help with my hair. I had no idea what to do with it as I paced my bedroom, all dressed up in my outfit, makeup applied and everything.

“Alright, in the chair!” Lydia told me as she barged into the room and I scurried to the chair in front of my vanity. She stood behind me, brushing my hair as she thought what she could do to it and she ended up french braiding my hair into two tails. “There!” She grinned and I stood up, standing in front of her.

“How do I look?” I asked, twirling around while biting my lip. “D-Do you think Stiles will like it?” She smiled, nodding her head.

“He’ll love it. I promise you,” She said, linking my arm with hers as we head towards her car, driving to Danny’s party. I became more nervous the closer we got towards the loft, since I’ve never actually been to a party before. We pulled up to Derek’s building, getting out of the car as I look up, seeing all the lights going off in his loft, my heartbeat speeding up. “C’mon, you got this.”

We walked into the loft, seeing the mass of people dancing to pop music, most of them grinding on each other and I was about to walk out when Lydia stopped me. She gave me a look and I sighed, turning around, walking into the loft as she brings me towards the body painting area. The girl running it smiled at me, which I returned and asked me what I had wanted. “Uh, surprise me,” I chuckled and she nodded her head as she began to paint lines on my body, noticing how nervous I am.

“How come you’re nervous? Meeting a guy here?” She asked and I glanced at her, swallowing visibly as I nodded my head.

“Y-Yeah. My best friend, who I have an unhealthy crush on,” I muttered, looking down at the glowing paint. She grinned as I blushed, thankful that it was dark in here, continuing her painting.

“That’s adorable. Are you going to tell him tonight?” She looked up at me as she finished the paint job on my body. “Do you want lipstick?” She questioned and I nodded my head, pointing at the orange one. She picked it up, placing the color on my lips. I rubbed my lips together and she gave me a thumbs up, telling me it was perfect.

“To answer your question, I might. I’m not actually sure yet. I need to muster up the courage first,” I chuckled, giving her a tip. She takes the five dollar bill, smiling at me as she patted my back.

“You got this!” She grinned, pushing me towards the crowd. I bumped into a few people, muttering apologies as I try to find Lydia. I heard the loft’s door slide open, glancing over to it as I see Stiles, Scott and Kira walk into the place. I made my way over to them, smiling when Stiles noticed me, his eyes widening a bit.

“Stiles!” I yelled, bringing him into a hug, feeling his arms wrap around my waist. I pulled away from him, waving at Scott and Kira. “How does my body paint look?” I questioned and Stiles’ eyes raked over my body, licking his lips a bit, nodding his head.

“I-It… You looks great,” He breathed out and the song changed, the familiar beat of my favorite song came on: It Won’t Kill Ya by The Chainsmokers. I really wanted to ask him to dance, but chickened out. His hand wrapped around my wrist, leading me towards the spiral staircase as we sat down on the steps.

Oh, dance with me, it won't kill ya

And one for the road

I tapped my foot to the beat, watching people dance, seeing Allison and Isaac dance together, along with Kira and Scott. I let out a sigh, glancing to my left, looking at Stiles, his eyes on the dance floor.

Dance with me, it won't kill ya

And one before you go

“Um, Stiles?” I asked and he glanced down at me, letting out a hm. I can feel my heart pounding against my chest. “D-Do you wanna dance?” I looked towards the dance floor then back at him as his lips parted, doing the same.

Dance with me, it won't kill ya

And one for the road

So why won't you stay a little longer?

“O-Oh, I don’t know,” He started and I bit the inside of my cheek, nodding my head. “I’m not a great dancer,” Stiles muttered, his eyes still on me as I looked away from him. He’s killing my confidence here.

“E-Excuse me,” I whispered, standing up about to walk away when his fingers gripped onto mine, making me turn around. He stood up, intertwining our fingers, leading me towards the dancing people. I bit my lip, looking at the back of his head and he stopped in the middle of everyone, facing me a small smile on his lips.

“Even though I’m not a great dancer, I’ll gladly dance with you. Especially to your favorite song.” He took a few steps back and I furrowed my eyebrows, wondering what he’s going to do. He began doing the sprinkler in a weird, hyper way and I busted out laughing, covering my mouth with my hand as I joined him, dancing like fools together.

You're putting your jacket on

Oh no, is the moment gone?

Don't wanna regret this one

Ooh, I wanna know ya

He pulled me closer to him, grinning as he finally looked relax. I laid my hands on his biceps, smiling up at him as our foreheads touched, my cheeks heating up, not realizing how close we were. Both of us moved to the beat, his hands on my hips as I shake them side to side. We continued to dance for about a half an hour, my feet ending up getting tired as I took his hand in mine, pulling him back towards the spiral staircase. Stiles sat behind me, his arms wrapped around my waist as I laid against his chest.

“I’m really glad you invited me, Y/N,” He whispered into my ear, feeling his lips on the side of it. I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath as my heart skipped a beat.

“I’m glad I did too,” I muttered, looking back at him. His eyes connected with mine and started to lean in, our noses brushing together as my eyes fluttered shut, waiting for his lips to connect with mine. Our friends watched from a distance as Stiles closed the gap between us, moving our lips against each others. I rested a hand on his cheek as his hands grip my waist, pulling me closer to him, sitting on one of his legs. He pulled away, his lips parted as I opened my eyes, smiling down at him, running my fingers through his hair. Some of my orange paint was on his lips and I giggled, rubbing my thumb along his bottom lip as his tongue came out, licking his lips a few times.

“Wanna get out of here?” He asked and I nodded my head, getting off of his lap. Stiles intertwined our fingers as he lead me out of the loft. “If you didn’t get the hint from that kiss, um, I really really like you, Y/N,” Stiles muttered, looking down at me as he leaned onto the back of the jeep. I stood in between his legs, taking both his hands in mine as I smiled.

“I really like you too, Stiles.” I bit my lip before leaning up, pressing a chaste kiss to his lips as he had the biggest grin on his lips. He leaned down again, meshing our lips together in a sloppy kiss before we got into the jeep, driving to his house.

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princess-soa · 7 years

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The Italian Bartender Ch.2

Intro

Chapter 1

Themes: Swearing, Violence, Sadness(?), SMUT

Pairing: Tig X OC, Chibs X OC-Eventual

Juice was a huge help in the coming weeks; he helped me get over Tig and we became very close friends. I continued to bar-tend at the parties as well as bar-tend at the club in Stockton and whenever I had to go to classes, Jax made sure a Son came with me so Tig couldn't bother me while I studied. Opie and Chibs also became super close with me, seeing as they were the ones to often accompany me at the bar or to school. I figured that Tig wouldn't mess with those two as much as he would with the prospects or older members so that is why they were often with me. I didn't see Tig much; most likely because of a warning he was given or because he didn't want to see me at all. However, I was soon told differently from Juice who claims the man is a wreck and he missed me greatly.

“His loss.” I sighed with a small smile, high-fiving Juice even though my heart broke a little for my old love.

Tig and I soon became inseparable; he always made some sort of appearance whenever I bar-tended at the club and always stayed close to me when I bar-tended at the clubhouse for the MC parties. He sent a prospect with me whenever I went to college and made sure I got all of my work done on time and he even made sure I had enough time to do it.

“You spoil me, you know.” I told him one evening as he rubbed my feet and calves while I worked on a paper for a few hours before we called it a night. We were both sitting on the couch, my legs were in his lap and he was watching a common car repair show. He looked and me and smiled fondly, replying with, “It’s not so much spoiling as it is treating my girl right.”

“Is that so?” a light blush tinted my cheeks pink and I smiled back.

“Yes, doll.” He winked at me before turning his attention back to the television.

I smiled happily and saved my work before setting my laptop off to the side and climbing up onto Tig’s lap. He looked at me a bit surprised but didn't complain, instead he wrapped his arms around my waist and made sure I wouldn't fall off his lap.

“Well hi there.” He grinned up at me and I grinned back.

“Hi.” I replied before leaning down to press a fond kiss to his lips, my hair falling to offer a sort of shield as we made out like teenagers.

Two months had passed since I left Tig and life was starting to look up again. Chibs tagged along a lot more than Juice did now but I didn’t mind. The Scotsman was fun to be around and he gave off a sort of calming effect that kept my hectic mind at bay. He let me ride around on his bike with him but he wouldn't let me pay for gas. Instead, he said he would take proper, home-cooked food as payment and he had a special fondness for my Tortilla Espanolas, unlike Juice who couldn’t appreciate good food when he got it. He accompanied me when I went to change my hair style and color and was even teaching me some Gaelic as long as I taught him some Italian and Spanish in return, which I couldn’t turn down for the life of me.

“You are a god-send.” I told him one afternoon as we sat at the bar in the clubhouse.

The boys had just gotten out of church and I was serving some light beers for them and the hang-arounds alike. Tig stayed on the other side of the room but I could feel his eyes on me constantly.

“Na, darlin’. I’m jus’ trea’in’ a lady righ’.” He told me honestly and I grinned at him, leaning over the bar to press a soft kiss to his scarred cheek.

“Thank you, Filip.” I shot him a wink and he tipped his beer bottle towards me in acknowledgement before taking a long swig.

“Who else needs a refill?” I announced and the guys who did held up their bottles as a reply for a new one.

At our six-month anniversary, Tig came to my apartment with a bouquet of flowers and a gold key attached to the stems.

“What’s this?” I asked in shock as I took the flowers from him and let him inside, taking them to the kitchen to pour water into a vase before setting them in and then on the dinner table.

“A key to our apartment, should you want to move in with me.” He replied and this was the first time I had ever seen him nervous around me. He wasn't nervous when we slept together or when he kissed me or whenever we went on dates. So this was definitely a shock in itself.

“Don't think it’s too soon?” I asked him as I stood up and faced him, twirling the string around my finger on its string as I walked up so there was only about four inches between our bodies.

“Do you?” he countered and I shook my head.

“I think you’ll get tired of me.” I replied honestly, sliding my arms around his shoulders and moving in close.

“Never.” he grinned back, wrapping his arms around my hips and resting his hands on my dress-covered bottom.

“Then yes, I would love to live with you.” His eyes widened and a gigantic smile lit up his face before he picked up and spun me around.

“This weekend. You’re moving in this weekend. I don’t want to wait any longer.” he told me once he set me back down on my feet.

“I suppose it’s settled then.” he plopped a big kiss onto my mouth before pulling me towards the door.

“Charlie, darlin’, I need to speak with you for a minute.” Jax said from the other end of the bar once I had gotten all the refills.

“Whatcha need, president?” I asked curiously as I made my way towards him, pouring us both a shot of tequila as an opener. He smirked at me and we clinked glasses before downing the shots and getting to business.

“You speak Italian, right?” he replied, eyes locked on mine.

“Yes, sir, I do. Why?” my head tilted to the side as I waited patiently for him to explain.

“The club is need of your services for a deal we’re trying to lock down. You’ll be safe, but seeing as none of us speak the language, we are kinda in a bind.” he was going to continue babbling on but I held up a hand to stop him.

“Where do I sign?” his signature smirk lit up his face and his hands cupped my face.

“Thank you, darlin’. I appreciate this.” I smiled back and patted his hand before heading back over to Chibs who was watching the exchange intently.

“It looks like I’ll be tagging along on a meet, Filip. But only if I get to ride with you.” a smile lit up his face too and he nodded.

“Wouldna let you ri’e wit’ anyone else.” he told me truthfully.

I moved in with Tig that weekend just like he had promised and it was an experience for sure. The other guys helped with the move and would only take pizza and beer as payment, which I was happy to oblige. It was about midnight when everyone left and it was just Tig and I. We proceeded to christen every room in the apartment- a couple times- before finally collapsing in bed for a weekend of sleep. We didn’t leave the apartment at all until Monday, content to relax and enjoy the quiet that Jax had agreed to without much of a fight on our part. Tig had earned a weekend off and club life was quiet so everyone got to experience life at home for once.

“This is nice, Tiggy.” I whispered one evening as we relaxed on the couch, sleepy from vigorous sex that morning. We both just fell onto the cushions and he pulled a blanket over us so our naked skin wouldn't get cold as we dozed.

“I agree.” Tig yawned, his fingers lazily trailing along my spine.

“I love you.” I moved my head up so he could see me smile.

“I love you too, baby girl. So much.” he smiled back and pressed a kiss to my nose before laying his head back into the pillow and closing his eyes for a nap.

We set out about nine the next morning from the clubhouse, after they attended church. The first one I got to attend too, which surprised me quite a bit.

“It’s not like I could let you go into this meeting without some idea as to what is going on. Although, you know everything spoken at this table remains confidential, right?” Jax spoke from the head of the table, gavel twirling around his fingers.

“I’m a lot of things, Jackson, but a rat isn’t one of them.” This caused everyone to laugh but Tig, though that was not surprising in the slightest.

“That’s what I like to hear. Now, about this meet with the Italians…”

The next six months coasted by in a comfortable yet happy bliss: I continued with my schooling and bar-tending and Tig and I were going great. He was more focused while he worked in Teller-Morrow and the boys were telling me that he was more lax and controlled while they went on jobs and did meets and they couldn't thank me enough for that aspect. I got along well with the other women in the life and had even made some friends in the local crows and even Lyla, who let me help out at the studio on my free days. She enjoyed my ideas on projects she couldn't seem to get off the planning phases and the boys liked watching what we would come up with. Life was good.

We set out at nine, just like what was planned, and I rode on the back of Chib’s motorcycle, much to the amusement of everyone else. I could hear Tig huff angrily as I climbed up behind the Scot and clung to him tightly. He was laughing quietly as everyone began to kick their stands up and he patted my hand fondly before rolling out behind Jax.

“I dont think he likes this arrangement.” I said to him as we pulled out of the lot and onto the main road, the breeze whipping through my hair and creating a comfortable chill in my bones.

“I donna’ care.” Chibs replied with a big grin before speeding up, causing me to laugh and cling to him tighter.

We got interesting looks from Bobby and Piney as we all made our way to the meeting site; it made sense seeing as my face was resting against Chib’s back and I had a tight grip on his waist so I wouldn't fall as he navigated us smoothly along the pavement. My eyes had fallen closed as the ride continued on- a paternal fault of becoming sleepy on car rides, no matter the length.

“Wake up, love.” Chibs said softly, his lips pressing a soft kiss to my cheek as everyone slowed to a stop and rolled their bikes back into a neat row across from the restaurant we were meeting the Italians at.

“Sorry, Chibs.” I smiled sheepishly at him as I sat up and took his offered hand to help me off the bike before he slid his hands under my chin and undid the buckle for me.

“Is alright.” He lifted the helmet off my head and set it on the seat before offering me his arm which I took without thought.

“Alright, Charlie, here’s the deal. You’re with Chibby here, you’ve been together for awhile now and you’re here to help us with the gun distributing business. Chibs can't speak Italian, obviously, and you were our first option.” I nodded and I saw out of the corner of my eye that Tig did not like the situation but he knew he couldn't speak up since he had to right to me anymore.

“Sounds good, lead the way.” I smiled up at Jax from behind my sunglasses and he smiled back, pressing a kiss to my forehead.

“Aye, Jackie-boy, thas ma woman.” Chibs joked and my heart fluttered in my chest at the comment, but I wasn't sure why.

“Alright, alright.” Jax grinned and shot me a wink before we all headed up to the front door of the restaurant. Chibs held the door open for me and let me walk in first with all of the guys following in behind. The prospects were posted by the door to keep watch and the rest of us went deep into the building to the meet. I was greeted by rich Italian food-dishes and soft music playing somewhere in the background.

“Buongiorno gentiluomini e signora!(Good afternoon gentlemen and lady)” A more robust gentleman yelled out with a gigantic grin, greeting us halfway and holding his hand out for me in particular. I obliged and let him take it, smiling politely as he pressed a kiss to my knuckles.

“buon pomeriggio signore, il mio nome è Charlie(good afternoon sir, my name is Charlie),” I replied back easily, my smile genuine as I saw his face light up at the aspect that I could chat with him in his native language.

“Mi chiamo mario lupio, mio zio si scusa per non essere in grado di partecipare a se stesso. questi ragazzi non parlano italiano(My name is mario lupio, my uncle apologizes for not being able to attend himself. do these boys not speak italian)?” he asked me as he ushered all of us to a large, round table and motioned for all of us to take a seat. Chibs sat next to me with Jax on the other side and everyone else took their respective places.

“è giusto, capiamo. no, ma questo fa parlare gaelico(it’s alright, we understand. no, but this one does speak Gaelic).” I replied, patting Chibs’s hand as he gave me a confused yet pleased smile in return.

“sì, un uomo scozzese. Ho sempre fatto la scozia(yes, a Scottish man. I always did like scotland).” the man replied before making a hand motion and suddenly there were drinks being poured and appetizers being served all around us.

“Can we start on the real reason we are here?” Jax asked somewhat irritated, not used to his meets being so carefree and informal. Especially when it was in a language he couldn't understand.

“scusandolo, non ha avuto molto sonno. Vuole discutere la ragione della riunione(excuse him, he didn't get much sleep. He wants to discuss the reason of the meet.)” The man nodded in understanding and suddenly everything took on a serious tone.

“sì, le armi. mio zio sa delle offerte che la SOA fa e vuole. È disposto a pagare 300 mila in anticipo per una spedizione e poi continuare i dividendi se tutto va bene(yes, the guns. my uncle knows of the deals the SOA make and he wants in. He's willing to pay 300 thousand upfront for a shipment and then continuing dividends if everything goes well).” I relayed this information back to Jackson and the table and he looked to Chibs for his input.

“We can do 350 thousand upfront for the first shipment and then 325 thousand for every continuing shipment thereafter.” The guys came up with a common census and I told the gentleman what they had counter-offered.

“sono disposti a fare 350 mila in anticipo e poi 325 mila per ogni ulteriore spedizioni(they are willing to do 350 thousand upfront and then 325 thousand for any further shipments).” He thought it over for a moment before nodding with a smile back on his face.

“Accetta questa offerta e attende una telefonata con informazioni per la prima riunione(He accepts that offer and is looking forward to a phone call with information for the first meet).” I smiled back and we clinked our glasses in a toast before I told Jax what he had said.

“Expect a call within the next two days with a date and time. We look forward to working with you guys for a long while.” Jax wanted me to relay that back to him as he stood, causing everyone else to stand as well.

“Aspetta una chiamata entro i prossimi due giorni con una data e l'ora. Non vediamo l'ora di lavorare con te ragazzi per un lungo periodo(Expect a call within the next two days with a date and time. We look forward to working with you guys for a long while).” They shook hands and he showed us to the door politely, pulling me off to the side for a brief comment which had Chibs stopping too, even if he couldn't understand what the man told me.

“Mio zio è disposto a farlo anche se sei lì. Per ogni incontro(My uncle is only willing to do this if you are there as well. For every meet).” I nodded in understanding and told him that I would be and that is when he let all of us back outside to head to the bikes.

“What did he tell you, Charlie?” Jax asked me as we all climbed onto the motorcycles.

“I have to be present at every meet or else his uncle was out of the deal. Me being there was the only way that he would meet with you at all.” everyone halted in their actions and I heard Tig and Piney curse under their breath.

“I don’t like it.” Jax finally said, a cigarette between his lips as he thought it over.

“I’m the only one who can understand anything they say, Jackson. It’s a smart move for me to be there, for both you and his uncle.” I replied, settling back in my seat and braiding my hair before tucking it under my helmet.

“We’ll discuss it further tonight at Church.” I nodded and slid my sunglasses on, glad that didn't spiral out as easy as it could have.

*Yes, I used google translate, but that is because I am in the process of slowly learning Italian. By any means, this is still a rough draft and I would greatly appreciate any input as the language and comments about the work in general! :) Let me know if you want to be added to a tag list; this will be updated as I get a few chapter written each time.

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viralhottopics · 8 years

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‘Rugrats’ Characters Ranked By Betchiness

For this weeks TBT, were going to take a look into the lives of the most influential baby friend group of the ’90s. Im talking, of course, about the Rugrats and, most importantly, how betchy or not betchy each Rugrat is. Is it polite to rank toddlers who have not yet learned to speak based on arbitrary social categories? Probs not. Is it fun? Fucking duh.

1. Cynthia

Heres what we know about Cynthia: 1) Shes a really cool dancer, 2) Shes got cool moves (as long as you move her arms and legs), 3) Shes movin out on the floor, 4) Shes ready to break some eggs (make an omelette Cynthia!) How do we know all this? We know it from her workout tape, which I am shocked has not been sampled by Avicii or Kanye or someone yet (dont listen unless you want this song stuck in your head all day).

youtube

Cynthias resting bitch face is on point, and she manages to look great in her belted orange dress despite the fact that she is missing of her hair. Cynthia didnt say or do shit for all 9 seasons of, yet she is still one of the shows most memorable characters, and it is her ability to do no work and remain popular that has earned her the number one slot.

2. Susie Carmichael

Susie Carmichael is cool AF. Did Susie need to appear in every episode? No. Susie had other shit to do. Shell check in every once in awhile to see what the babies are up to, teach them about Kwanzaa and generally let them know whats good, before going back next door to hang with her real friends. Whenever she does come over, the babies flip out because theyre like, obsessed with her (everyone is). Shes also the only person who has absolutely no time for Angelicas bullshit, probably because Susie has better hair, a better outfit, and wears a cool red bangle, which is more than Angelica could ever hope to have. Susie is three, which makes her older and wiser than most of the babies and probably accounts for the sheer lack of fucks she has to give. Did Susie get her ass lost in the woods when Dil was born? Fuck no, she was chilling in Paris getting turnt up with her older sister! Did Susie almost die with the Rugrats in EuroReptarland? No bitch, I just told you shes already been to Paris! Susie Carmichael always comes correct, and thats what earned her the number two spot.

3. Tommy Pickles

Tommy Pickles is the star of the show, which virtually guarantees him betchiness. Tommy also has the whole dressing like a slut thing down and spends all nine seasons of wearing nothing but a crop top and booty shorts. His outfit never stops him from leading his friend group on adventures, and you know once he can talk and operate a phone hed be the person managing the group chat, suggesting what clubs and parties to go to, making sure everyone is getting the free shots they deserve, and seeing you into your Uber at the end of the night. The thing holding Tommy back from the top spot is that hes too fucking nice. Hell let any baby with shit in their diaper come hang with him (cough CHUCKIE cough), and that means his friend group is riddled with duds (HI CHUCKIE). Be a little more discerning about your friend group, Thomas, and maybe well see you up at the top with Cynthia.

4. Angelica Pickles

We cant talk about Cynthia without getting to her BFF and designated Rugrat BSCB, Angelica Pickles. Angelica spent most of torturing the dumb babies (who were really only like a year younger than her) and making them miserable, yet still somehow being invited to all the group hangs, play dates, and brunches. Angelica spends a lot of time telling everyoneincluding the adultshow beautiful she is and is absolutely desperate for attention, probably because her rich AF parents never pay attention to her. Shes your friend who cries and starts shit at the club anytime she feels like shes not the hottest girl there (and she frequently is notthanks Cynthia!) Also girl, lay off the cookies.

5. Charlotte Pickles

Charlotte Pickles is Angelicas mom who is literally always on her phone. Like, always. Even in a time before cellphones could fit in your pocket, Charlotte is always on the phone with her assistant Jonathan (Cheban? We dont know) and ignores basically every member of her family to do so. When phones dont work, Charlotte straight up makes her husbands brother carry a fax machine around so she doesnt miss any important texts. Charlotte alternates between a power suit and workout gear, always accompanied by an Ariana Grande level high ponytail. In , Charlotte displays clear signs of some seriously botched cosmetic surgery, which is what has dropped her down to slot #5. Never try to cut corners on botox, Charlotte! Itll always go wrong. Honestly, Jonathan should have told you that.

6. Grandpa Lou

Grandpa Lou is another character who gives absolutely zero fucks and is down to hang. Much like Corinne, Lou loves naps and often falls asleep halfway through finishing his stories. Despite his old age, Lou is still a fuckboy, and is often seen hitting on women and generally trying to find ways to get laid. If had taken place in 2017, Lou would have definitely had a Tinder and that Tinder definitely would have had a picture of him from 20+ years earlier. Lou is eventually successful in finding a new wife, Lulu, who he moves in with pretty fast after they start hooking up (risky choice, Lou!) Outside of his strangely active love life, Lou also has many frenemies, including his own cousin Miriam; his bowling rival, Billy Strike Maxwell; and some other wrestling guy named Conan McNulty. This proves that when push comes to shove, Lou is just not very popular and kind of an old perv. Sixth place for you, Lou.

7. Phil And Lil Deville

Okay Im sorry, but Phil and Lil are fucking gross. Their diet is a mess, always eating fucking worms and mud and shit. Do you know how many calories are in a ball of worms, kids? Do you? Seriously. There is a episode where Phil and Lil drink straight-up toilet water. What the fuck is that? Is that something babies do? Phil and Lil also have no creativity when it comes to fashion, and instead just dress alike every damn day in greena color that is flattering on exactly 0 people. Their mom is a hardcore feminist, which is cool, but maybe the twins have been empowered to do a little bit too much. Like sure, Lil can do whatever she wants with her life, but maybe eating a giant pile of shit should not be one of those things? Idk. Seventh place.

8. Stu Pickles

Good Lord is Stu Pickles a sad man. Seriously. You have a beautiful house, two healthy babies, a cool Jewish wife who has managed to maintain her pre-baby body, and youre still fucking complaining! Look around, asshole! You have all this shit despite the fact that your dumb ass hasnt invented one successful toy. In fact, you havent even invented one toy that didnt explode and almost kill your entire family. You are literally #blessed but youre too blind to see it! The only thing keeping you from the bottom slot is this meme which, in the current political climate, is legit all of our lives right now:

9. Chuckie Finster

No. Just no. Im sorry, but again, its gonna be a hard pass on Chuckie. Here are all the things Chuckie would have to improve if he ever even wanted to hope to be betchy. 1) His voice, which is terrible. Do you have a cold, Chuckie? Go to the damn doctor. Its the ’90s. Hillary Clinton has passed the State Childrens Health Insurance Plan. You can go to the doctor. Go. 2) Grow. A. Pair. Dude. You know when Chuckie gets older hes gonna be your friend who calls the cops on his own party for getting out of hand. Hes gonna be that guy who side eyes you for doing molly at Coachella, making weird comments under his breath about how you never know whats in that stuff and generally bringing bad vibes despite the fact that Beyonc is literally pregnant and dancing in front of you. 3) The hair is a problem. Comb it. Dye it. Do something. Its a problem. 4) Tie your fucking shoes, dude. 9th place.

10. Chas Finster

There was no character on television from 1991-2004 that was less betchy than Chas Finster. He has all of Chuckies problems, but he is a fucking adult which means he has literally no excuse for being such a narc. Chas seems to be suffering from whatever health problems are affecting his son, and despite being a bureaucrat, apparently has no ability to get his ass to a doctor either. Like many sad old nerds, Chas must travel to a foreign country to find a wife, eventually convincing a way-too-hot-for-him Japanese woman to fly to America and be his Melania. Chas also has a double-Hitler mustache, which is 100% unacceptable, no matter what decade you live in. Sorry, Chas. Last place.

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from ‘Rugrats’ Characters Ranked By Betchiness

#‘Rugrats’ Characters Ranked By Betchiness

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rohitkkumar · 3 years

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Give me half of what you did' Raina on Sehwag’s 122 against CSK in IPL 2014

John just knew that there had to be a way to capitalize on the fact that he knew his twin sister Kelly had lost her virginity and was regularly getting laid. Even though they were only 18 years of age, John had enough of his father in him to always try to find a way to capitalize on a situation. That's what comes from having a stockbroker for a father. The fact that he was totally in love with his sister and always had been just made it a little harder. He had constantly heard his father espousing the philosophy that business was business and friendship was friendship and you couldn't let the two get in the way of each other if they were both to succeed. And since his father had made millions of dollars in the market, John knew he knew what he was talking about.

But then there was Kelly. John didn't just love his sister, he was in love with her. To him there was no more beautiful girl in the world, with maybe the exception of their mother, Karin. Kelly was 5'6" tall and 120 pounds. She had long curly red hair that hung halfway down her back and bright green eyes. Her figure had really filled out in the last year, and he knew from going through her clothes that she wore a 36C bra. Sometimes he could see her nipples sticking out from her t-shirt when she didn't wear a bra, like around the house.

He himself was just topping 6' in height and weighed an even 170 pounds. He loved sports and was constantly looking at his muscles in the mirror in disbelief as his body became more and more defined. He couldn't wait until he was fully grown like his father.

Jason Redson was the perfect picture of success; 6'4" tall, dark hair with blue eyes. John always thought his father should have been a movie star, not a stockbroker. With his mother and Kelly almost look-alike twins, he knew that he had been born into a blessed family and was determined to take advantage of it. That's what assets were for, his father constantly told him; if you don't utilize them, what good are they.

Well, he was bound and determined to utilize them, he thought as he massaged his cock in his hand while thinking of his lovely sister. He smiled as he looked down at the 8" of hard cock in his hand, wondering if either of the 3 boys that he knew Kelly was fucking had cocks as big as his. She didn't even have a boyfriend. He felt his frustrations peak as his balls scrunched up and cum shot from the end of his cock, splashing all over the floor in front of his bed. When he finished cumming, he stood up, determined to figure a way out of his dilemma before he went crazy.

While John got dressed in his room, Kelly was just waking up in her room next door. She kicked the covers off and enjoyed a luxuriant stretch as she thought of the previous night and smiled. Biff Wilson had fucked her and sucked her to so many orgasms that she had thought she would explode from pleasure. Instead, when he had finally collapsed, too drained for any more, she had felt like she only wanted more and more and more.

She felt her nipples getting hard and her pussy getting wet as she lay there and thought about it. God, she loved sex. It had only been a couple of months since she had lost her cherry, but she found herself thinking of sex almost all of the time. Her hands went to her breasts, cupping them, her fingers automatically finding her hard, erect nipples and pinching and pulling on them. One hand slid down between her legs to feel the warm moistness there, a finger finding her huge, erect clit and gently rubbing it. She forced herself to stop, knowing that if she didn't, that she'd lay there the whole day and play with herself. It was Saturday and she had the whole weekend to look forward to.

https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/dont-stung-be-latest-pyramid-22693957

I wonder what John's doing today, she thought, a smile crossing her face when she thought of her big gorgeous twin brother. She knew all the girls at school got wet whenever they saw him. And he didn't even have a clue, she thought, shaking her head in amazement. He could be getting more pussy than anyone she knew if he'd just try. She knew that he noticed girls, she had seen the looks she had gotten when she sometimes wore a tight t-shirt without a bra around the house. She was sure she had seen him with a lump in his pants on more than one occasion.

Maybe I'll hang with John today, tease him a little bit and find out what he's been up to, she thought, reaching for a cut-off t-shirt and pulling it over her head. It barely came down enough to cover her breasts, and her nipples pressed out against the material, making it very obvious that she had no bra on. She then reached for a pair of cut-offs, slipping into them without any underwear. She loved the feeling of the thick seam rubbing her clit as she moved her legs. She knew if she wasn't careful, she'd wet the entire crotch.

Poor John, she thought as she brushed her hair. She had really been ignoring him for the last few months while her hormones had raged for the first time in her life and she had become quickly addicted to sex. They had always been real close, just like twins, always talking and sharing their secrets with each other. He was the first person she had told that she had lost her cherry when it had happened and it had seemed to her that their relationship had sort of changed from that point on. She opened the door to her room and waltzed down the hallway to the kitchen where she found both her parents and John sitting down to breakfast.

"Good morning, everyone," she said, sliding into a seat. "I'm starved."

"Well, good morning to you, too," Karin said. "Don't you think you could have found a bit more of a shirt to wear?" she asked.

"Oh, mom, it's Saturday and I'm having breakfast in my own home," Kelly replied. "I'm not going out like this."

"Jason," Karin said. "Please say something."

"Well, she's certainly growing up, isn't she?" Jason said, shaking his head.

"How would you like it if I dressed like that around the house?" Karin asked. "You think you'd be so relaxed about it?"

"No, I don't," he replied, a big smile on his face. "Why don't you try it and find out."

"Yeah, mom, what's wrong with the way I'm dressed, anyway?" Kelly asked, laughing at her mother's look of surprise. "I'm covered. You can see more when I wear a bathing suit and you don't tell me not to wear one in public."

"I'm sorry I ever said anything," Karin said, sitting back down. "You look wonderful, dear. It's nice that you're so comfortable with yourself and your family."

"What's the big deal anyway?" John suddenly said. "It's not like it's not obvious that she's got breasts now. She'd still have them even if she wore a sack."

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"Just forget it," Karin said, laughing now herself. "I must be getting old."

"What are you two going to do today?" Jason asked as they ate breakfast.

"I don't know," Kelly answered. "I thought I'd see what John's up to and hang out with him."

"I don't really have any plans," John said, inwardly pleased to hear what his sister had said, and also happy to see what she was wearing. "Maybe I'll go down to the river for a while."

"That sounds like fun," Kelly said. "I haven't been down there in a while."

"Well, I'm off to play golf," Jason said, getting to his feet. "I'll see all of you later."

"You two help me clean up first," Karin said. "I assume you have a date tonight?" she asked Kelly.

"Yup," Kelly said, nodding her head. "Jimmy Hastings."

"Well, don't forget your curfew," Karin said.

"I won't, mom," Kelly assured her. "I promise."

"I'm going to change, then we'll go," John said as they finished cleaning up from breakfast.

"Okay, I'll wait here," Kelly said, noticing that his eyes strayed to her chest yet again.

It was less than a mile to the river along a trail through the forest that bordered their house. They walked in silence, savoring the smells and sounds of the forest until they got to the river. Then a little further along the bank they came to a small grassy clearing under a big oak tree that overhung the river.

"God, I love this place," Kelly said, flopping down on the ground on her back, her arms flung wide.

"It's the best," John agreed, noticing that her shirt had pulled up, exposing the undersides of her breasts.

"John, why don't you ever go out with any of the girls?" Kelly suddenly asked, pushing up so that she was propped on her elbows.

"I don't know," John mumbled, glancing at her and seeing that the bottom of her breasts were now almost completely exposed up to the edge of her nipples.

"I know so may girls who would give anything to go out with you," she said. "I mean, you're the best-looking guy in the whole school."

"Right. Who says?" John asked, snorting in contempt.

"Well, I do," Kelly said, smiling at him. "And I'd know."

"Oh, how's that?" John asked, unable to avoid smiling.

"Because I'm dating all the best-looking boys and none of them even come close to you," she replied.

"How come you always go out with someone different?" John asked.

"Why not!" Kelly said. "I'm not looking to only go out with one guy. I'm young. I want to see what different guys are like."

"Are they really all that different?" John asked.

"Oh, yes, they sure are," Kelly laughed. "No two alike."

"Not at all?" John asked.

"Well, they all want to fuck," Kelly said. "That's for sure. But then they're different there, too."

"What!" John exclaimed, staring at her.

"Oh, you know," Kelly said, laying back down, her hands behind her head.

Now her shirt pulled up so that her nipples were exposed and John watched as they crinkled and screwed themselves into hard knots. Her feet were flat on the ground about shoulder width apart and John could see where the material bunched into her crotch. He wasn't certain, but he thought that maybe she wasn't wearing any panties.

"What do you mean by that?" John asked again.

"Well," Kelly began, sitting up cross-legged in front of him, "some guys are bigger and some are more tender and some are faster."

"Are you talking about...."

"Sex," Kelly said emphatically, seeing him blush.

"Uh, are you, you know, doing it with lots of different guys?" John asked, now absolutely certain that she wasn't wearing any panties.

"If I go out with them, I make sure they fuck me," Kelly said, watching his face.

"Kelly!" John said, his face turning crimson and his cock twitching in his shorts.

"That's why I want you to go out with some of my friends," Kelly said plaintively. "They'd fuck you in a heartbeat and then we could talk about it."

"Talk about it!" John exclaimed. "What do you mean?"

"I don't have anyone to talk to about it," Kelly said. "You know, like how do you do this or do you like that, those kind of things. If you were fucking my girlfriends, we could compare notes."

"Jesus, Kelly," John said, shaking his head.

"Or if I knew some older guys that had more experience, they could probably tell me how to do things that they like," Kelly went on.

"Why is it so important?" John asked, staring at the red hairs that were sticking out on either side of her shorts at the crotch.

"Oh, John, I love sex so much that I can hardly think of anything else. Just thinking about it or talking about it gets me so excited," she said, bringing her hands up to cover her breasts, squeezing them firmly. "I know you've noticed."

"It's impossible not to," John said, now openly looking at her breasts when she lowered her hands.

"Let's go swimming," Kelly suddenly said, jumping to her feet.

"We didn't bring suits," John observed.

"So what?" Kelly said. "You afraid to skinny-dip with me?" she asked, smiling at him.

"I don't know if we should," John said, shocked at the suggestion being voiced that was foremost in his mind.

"Well, I'm going in then," Kelly said. "You join me if you want to," she said, stepping down to the edge of the bank and pulling her shirt off over her head, her back to John. Dropping it next to her, she quickly skinned out of her shorts and dove into the river, leaving a gape-mouthed John standing on the bank.

"Come on, silly," Kelly said as she broke the surface and turned to look at him. "The water's great. Don't be embarrassed."

"Well, I am," John said, truly embarrassed and feeling his cock growing in his shorts to prove it.

"I'm your sister," Kelly said with a laugh, floating on her back, her breasts sticking up out of the water, and her fiery-red pubic hair just visible below the surface. "Besides, nobody's here, is there?"

"No, I guess not," John agreed, staring at her.

"And nobody's likely to come here, are they?" Kelly asked, her eyes on his growing bulge.

"Not likely," John agreed.

"Then come in the water with me," she said, "or I'll come out there and drag you in, clothes and all."

"You couldn't even if you tried," John laughed.

"But I'd try, and that's the thing, isn't it?" Kelly laughed, seeing the truth of what she said register on his face. "If you're not in the water by the count of three, I'm coming out to get you," she warned. "One. Two. Three. Then here I come," Kelly said, swimming towards the bank.

John just stood there watching her, not believing for a minute that she would actually come out of the water with him standing there like that. He figured she just wanted to see if she could get him to undress in front of her. But to his surprise, Kelly didn't stop when she got to the bank of the river, she just stood up and began walking up the bank towards him, water running off her hard nipples, her breasts swaying as she climbed up. And he could see the moisture sparkling in her sparse red pubic hair. He could even make out the outline of her pussy lips as she scrambled up towards him.

"Now you're asking for it," she said, reaching for him.

John put his hands out to stop her but she just kept coming at him, not even stopping when his hands filled with her breasts as she grabbed at the waist of his shorts. When he tried to pull his hands back from her breasts, she pulled herself even closer, her hands entangled in his shorts and her breasts pressing up against his t-shirt. He felt his cock growing even harder as suddenly Kelly succeeded in opening his shorts and pulling them down around his knees, his cock bulging in his underwear.

"Ooohh, so that's why you didn't want to undress and come in the water," Kelly said, staring at his cock bulging in his underwear. "But I don't mind," she said. "I'll just take it as a compliment," suddenly grabbing his underwear and pulling them down to the ground along with his shorts. As she did so, his cock sprang out, hitting her in the face before she could get out of the way. "Now you can come in the water," she said, standing up, her face flushed with the excitement of her brother's huge cock slapping her in the face. Turning, she ran back down the embankment and dove into the river. As she rose to the surface, she heard John hitting the water behind her, and then he surfaced a few feet away.

"That's better, you silly," she said, laughing. "Isn't the water great?"

"It is nice," John agreed, floating.

"You have such a beautiful cock, John," Kelly said, staring at his cock laying up on his stomach.

"Jesus, Kelly, are you nuts?" John asked, rolling over in the water and hiding himself from her.

"Well, what's wrong with telling your brother that you think he's a hunk?" Kelly asked. "You are. Don't you think I'm nice to look at?" she asked, pirouetting in front of him.

"I think you're the most beautiful girl I've ever seen," John said.

"And I make your cock hard, don't I?" she asked, smiling at him.

"Yes, you do, most definitely," John agreed, grinning at her.

"Well, at least you can admit it," Kelly said, splashing him and then swimming for the bank.

She scrambled up the embankment and John was treated to the sight of her ass and pussy from behind. His cock got even harder so he stayed in the water for several more minutes, willing himself to relax before starting for the embankment and scrambling to the top. When he got there, he realized that he would have been as well off just leaving the water with Kelly, as she was laying on her back in the grass with her knees up and spread apart, one hand between her legs rubbing her pussy. He watched for a second as she would dip a finger into her hole, then rub it around on her clit. He could clearly see her big puffy outer lips with her inner lips protruding and flowering open, revealing her huge clit standing out almost an inch.

"God, Kelly," John exclaimed, his cock instantly rocketing to its full size.

"I thought you were still swimming," Kelly said, slamming her knees together and withdrawing her hand from her pussy, sitting up at the same time. "Oh, my god," she said when she saw John's full 8" sticking straight out at her. "You're incredible," she said, unconsciously bringing her fingers to her mouth and sucking on them. "I've never seen a cock that big before."

"Really?" John asked, flopping down on his stomach to hide his erection.

"Yeah, really," Kelly said, smiling at him. "You're huge."

"I wish you wouldn't talk like this," John said. "It's hard enough."

"I'll say," Kelly said with a laugh at his unintended pun. "You could make money with that thing."

"What do you mean?" John asked, always interested in anything that involved making money.

"I'd pay to be fucked by a cock like that," Kelly said, shaking her head wistfully.

"And I could have people standing in line to fuck you," John said, throwing it back at her. "How do you like the sound of that?"

"Actually, it makes me horny thinking of men standing in line to fuck me," Kelly said with a laugh.

"It would be like printing money," John said, his mind churning.

"Really! What do you mean?" Kelly asked.

"I'm sure men would pay through the nose to fuck you," John said.

"Do you really think so?" Kelly asked. "I mean, you think I'm that nice looking?"

"I told you, I think you're the most beautiful girl I've ever seen," John said.

"I thought you were just teasing me," Kelly said, staring at him. "You really mean that, though?"

"Yup," John said.

They rested in silence for a while, enjoying the sun, before Kelly spoke up again.

"John, do you masturbate a lot?" she asked suddenly.

"Jesus, Kelly," John exclaimed, staring at her. "What kind of a question is that?"

"Well, do you?" she persisted.

"I don't know, what's a lot?" John asked.

"But you do masturbate then?" Kelly asked, staring at him.

"Well, yeah, I guess," John admitted, realizing how she had trapped him again. "Do you?"

"Oh, all the time," Kelly said. "I love the way it feels when I cum."

John said nothing as he stared at her. Kelly fidgeted, feeling her pussy tingle as she thought of playing with herself. She felt her nipples getting hard and could see by the expression on John's face that he noticed it also.

"See, all I have to do is think about it and I get excited," Kelly said, cupping her breasts and gently rolling her nipples briefly between her fingers. "So, you think men would pay to fuck me?" she asked, dropping her hands.

"Absolutely," John said nodding. "I bet I could get $5,000."

"For what?" Kelly asked, staring at him, her mouth hanging open.

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fashiontrendin-blog · 6 years

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How To Dress With Sprezzatura

http://fashion-trendin.com/how-to-dress-with-sprezzatura/

How To Dress With Sprezzatura

What on earth is that man doing with his tie? Has he dressed in a huge hurry? What’s with the collar sticking out? Hold fire with your assumption that the subject of your disdain just doesn’t know how to dress well. Those points you critique may, in fact, be expressions of ‘sprezzatura’, the art of dressing artlessly. At least seemingly so…

But why would anyone seek to do this? For one, in a world – and in the culture that is clothing – that loves a rule, sprezzatura brings a touch of rebellion, it’s a style hack without going full on punkish revolution. It’s also a means to signal your individuality, even though you’re still perhaps wearing conventional clothing. Most of all, those who can carry off sprezzatura – and in attempting so it’s a fine line between style king and style clown – win the prize of being cool.

Like ‘cool’, you know a touch of sprezzatura when you see it. Like ‘cool’ too, it can be overdone, at which point it’s not cool any more. But, and here’s the good news, it can also be attained – acted out until it’s natural. And, as the writer Thom Gunn said in in his poem on the young Elvis Presley, “whether he poses or is real, no cat bothers to say…”

What Is Sprezzatura?

Sprezzatura is a way of getting dressed that undermines the accepted way of dressing, while still adhering to its typical garments.

If a tie is usually worn so the narrow side of the blade is behind the wider part, it’s sprezzatura to wear it the other way round; if the end of a belt is usually tucked into a belt loop, it’s sprezzatura to leave it dangling; if fastening a tailored jacket is what counts for good dress etiquette, it’s sprezzatura to leave it undone. Of course, to now do these things is not sprezzatura – you need to find your own touch of distinction.

Street Style, Pitti Uomo 94

Yes, it all looks a bit convoluted, especially for a way of style that is meant to convey the complete opposite: a lack of caring. But then sprezzatura, right back to its 16th century beginnings, was always something of a performance: a performance of personal panache.

The History Of Sprezzatura

‘Sprezzatura’ is one of those Italian words which, like ‘focaccia’ or ‘linguini’ seems alien at first, and then just becomes a natural part of your vocabulary. Unlike ‘focaccia’ or ‘linguini’, however, defining the word is akin to the trouble with defining ‘cool’ (in the non-temperature sense). Everyone knows what it is, but that’s not enough to say what it is; and if you think you have it, you haven’t.

The idea of sprezzatura, however, predates the commonplace use of ‘cool’ by about 400 years. It was in 1528 that writer and royal hanger-on Baldassare Castiglione coined the word in his book The Book of the Courtier – effectively a self-help tome for those wanting to climb the greasy pole of life ruled by the whims of aristocracy.

The book was a best-seller, a blockbuster, in its day. It proposed or, more accurately, repurposed ancient ideas of the ideal, Renaissance Man – he would be shaped by the best ideas; he’d be the ‘strong and silent’ but he would also have this thing called ‘sprezzatura’, which also referred to his appearance.

Marcello Mastroianni, 1960

In terms of style, sprezzatura suggested the kind of man who looked effortlessly elegant – though never stuffy or overly formal. The key word was ‘effortless’: it all looked easy and unforced, as though the man in question just happened to look simultaneously together and laid back, as if by accident. Sprezzatura was, if you like, faking it to make it. As Castiglione suggested, the more we work at practicing the principles of urbanity, the more they become part of you.

Whilst the Brits tried it as early as the 19th century, it was the Italians who made the most of it. “Historically it’s central to the idea of style in Italy,” notes Alessandro Sartori, the artistic director for Ermenegildo Zegna. “You see that in, say, the readiness to blend formal dressing with sportswear, in the play with textures – matt next to shiny. There’s always a way of dressing too Italian that slips into stereotype – that very polished look – but sprezzatura is much more organic.”

What Sprezzatura Means Today

Dress codes continue to break down; the lines between formal and casual dress are ever more blurred; we wear sneakers to work and a suit to go out. If ever there was less need for sprezzatura – a means of standing out without, you know, standing out – now might seem to be it. But, in fact, with the tendency to look ever more alike all the time, arguably there’s a greater need for a personal style to shine through in the details. Add with today’s greater accessibility of menswear – in terms of fashions, variety, pricing, ideas – it becomes a matter less of what you’re wearing as the way you wear it.

Marcello Mastrioanni, the actor, claimed, as he once said, “to hate fashion. Fashion and designer labels… It’s all so stupid for people to pay all these high prices just to have the designer’s name in a coat”; and yet he ordered 12 bespoke suits from Vittorio Zenobi, his tailor in Rome, every year. Capturing some essence of sprezzatura of cutting against the grain, he once noted that “the day when everyone is very, very elegant, I will start to go around dressed like a tramp.”

Giovanni Agnelli

Fellow Italian Gianni Agnelli, of the family behind the Fiat car-making dynasty, similarly embodied sprezzatura for the 20th century. He would wear his button-down collar unbuttoned; he wore his watch over his shirt cuff; he always wore his tie just a little off-centre and a little undone; he’d wear his double-breasted suits undone (a sartorial faux pas); he’d leave a couple of his suit’s cuff buttons undone; he’d sometimes wear slippers or hiking boots with his tailoring, creased though it was, albeit perfectly creased. He broke the usual sartorial expectations and didn’t worry about it.

Street Style, Pitti Uomo 92

Certainly, listed like that, the quirks of sprezzatura dressing may seem somewhat contrived, as though the individual in question was trying to be willfully different. And there is an element of truth to that. “But give an Italian man the same clothes to wear as one from Germany or the UK, for example, and he will still find a touch of difference,” reckons Naples shoemaker Paolo Scafora. “It’s why you can go anywhere in the world and spot an Italian man a long way off. He is expressing his self-respect and his respect for others.”

Express Yourself, Sprezzatura-Style

Commitment

Lapo Elkann in Milan

Sprezzatura is a look or an attitude you have to embrace; it can’t be done just a bit, without conviction, because then the effect is to look unfinished, or scruffitura, as the Italians never called it. The overall look is a bit ‘just got out of bed’ – albeit a bed in a five star hotel in the Amalfi Coast with nothing to do but soak up the admiring glances.

Rough And Ready

Street Style, Pitti Uomo

Think semi-formal – unstructured jackets, textured fabrics, knitted rather than silk ties – and the almost distressed. Foxing – the wear around a shirt collar – the scuff of a shoe, the patina on a belt, can all add to sprezzatura’s key lack of stiffness.

Let It All Hang Out

Street Style, Pitti Uomo 94

If it can be undone, consider undoing it – except your shoelaces and trouser fly. But a top shirt button (with tie), and a shirt or suit cuff, are all fair game. Leave tailored jackets open. And avoid ironing – at least nothing more than a light press.

It’s Not Just About Tailoring

James Dean, 1955

It’s harder to do because there are fewer elements to play with, but sprezzatura can apply as much to casual dress as more tailored dress. Take James Dean in Rebel Without A Cause for example: he’s in jeans, white T-shirt and a bomber jacket, but the jacket is worn just so, fastened only at the bottom and with collar turned up. Sprezzatura can see the smart and casual happily intermingled.

Discover Your Signature

Street Style, Pitti Uomo 94

Find a way of wearing that you like – the way Agnelli wore his watch or his shirt collars – and stick with it so that, over time, it becomes a signature. But just one or maybe two such signatures will do it. Don’t do all that you could. Then, to the unknowing eye, sprezzatura just looks messy. It needs, in an ideal world, to be your signature too – not, ahem, something you read about somewhere… But this is easier said than done.

Sprezzatura Dos and Dont’s

Do…

Understand there’s a time and place for sprezzatura – it works perfectly in a creative setting, less so in those in which tradition dictates a high degree of formality. Sprezzatura is not for the wedding – especially if you’re the groom – or for the boardroom, ever.

Avoid slipping into the stereotype of Italian dressing: very fitted jackets, ankle-skimming trousers, highly polished shoes and so on. Sprezzatura may come from Italian culture (technically before Italy existed) but it is not about looking Italian.

Be prepared for some not to get it. It might only take a few random comments from people reminding you that you’ve forgotten to fasten the buttons on your Oxford shirt collar, or that your tie isn’t straight, for the fun to wear off really fast. Still lost? Take your cues from the masters below and you’ll be on the right track.

Don’t…

Overdo it. The 21st century Italian peacock – of the kind documented in street style shots from the likes of the Italian menswear fair Pitti Uomo – does not have sprezzatura, for he lacks restraint, subtlety and, often, taste. Sprezzatura is, in contrast, all about little details, and less is more with those.

Think too hard about it. If it doesn’t come naturally, arguably it’s best just not to go there and to stick with the tried and tested, socially accepted notions of dressing well. Make too much of it and there’s a risk of being called out; and self-conscious sprezzatura is not sprezzatura at all.

Key Sprezzatura Figures

Alessandro Squarzi

The Italian fashion entrepreneur – he oversees the marketing and distribution of a number of brands – is well-placed to dip into various styles. And yet his year-round trademark is a pair of white trousers, which has never been easy to pull off, but which – in true sprezzatura mode – he stays loyal to regardless.

But his overarching skill is to make basic, comfortable clothing look incredibly stylish. He’s well into T-shirts and sweaters, slippers and sneakers, with some vintage bits thrown in – the likes of some old Levi’s or a throwback jacket.

Brunello Cucinelli

The founder of the Italian luxury lifestyle brand that goes by the same name, Cucinelli at first appears to rock standard Italian peacockery: the ankle-skimming trousers, the pocket square, the silky scarf. But he has an in-built scruffy edge that makes his look just a little off, and so much cooler for it – a jacket is crumpled, or worn over a crew-neck sweatshirt; a sharp double-breasted blazer is teamed with ripped jeans and a long belt; or a jacket and trousers that should be parts of a suit, but are actually ever so gently mis-matched.

He still looks very Italian, of course. But it’s his take on Italian. And that’s not easy in Italy.

Johannes Huebl

Is the German model an example of sprezzatura? His characteristic style is about as simple, as classic, as conservative as it comes, which leaves little room for individuality. He’s big on wearing one dark shade head to foot.

But then, on occasion, he surprises: a white – white! – double-breasted blazer that somehow he can wear without looking like the maitre’d; a shirt untucked; a hefty scarf tucked into his sweater; and some little touches – a brightly-coloured tassel on some dark loafers.

Joe Ottaway

The menswear consultant and style advisor to David Gandy gets top marks simply for being frequently seen alongside the model – and we mean seen; he doesn’t disappear into the shadow of those cheekbones. That’s because he’s doing his own thing (and he’s remarkably tall).

That thing is essentially rather olde English: three-piece suits, watch chains and nice monk-strap shoes. But he’s playful with colour – albeit within the classic menswear palette – and isn’t afraid to look just a little bit poncey. A suit, T-shirt and broad-brimmed hat combo? A belted pin-stripe safari jacket, worn with sleeves rolled? It’s not for everyone. But he wears it well.

Key Sprezzatura Pieces

Unstructured Blazer

A tailored jacket with all the padding and lining taken out perfectly embodies the notion of sprezzatura. It’s comfortable, non-restrictive and allows the wearer to give off a sense of nonchalance that’s hard to achieve with a sharp, structured garment.

Whether double- or single-breasted, wear yours open and undo a couple of the cuff buttons on each sleeve for a touch of sprezz.

Knitted Tie

The most casual type of tie, if there is such a thing. Although not suitable for the boardroom, knitted ties are ideal for smart casual attire and, as they lack stuffiness, give the potential to be worn with plenty of sprezzatura.

When tying it go for a simple four-in-hand knot, but don’t fuss around in the mirror for ten minutes adjusting and re-tying multiple times. Instead, just tie it once into a tight knot and roll with it – if the rear blade hangs longer than the front then so be it.

Pleated Trousers

Comfortable, smart and far less common than their flat fronted cousins, pleated trousers are here, and they’re here to stay. Usually designed to sit higher on the waist, they have the potential to elongate your legs and can look extremely elegant when worn well.

Slightly more formal than regular trousers, try rolling the cuffs to offset this and wear with suede loafers, or, contrast the look completely with white sneakers. Sprezzatura is all about mixing the formal with the casual, after all.

Button-Down Shirt (Worn Unbuttoned)

This is one of those things that can look contrived but, nevertheless, is a key sprezzatura detail.

First pulled off by Agnelli in the ‘60s – and by countless Italian followers since – leaving a button-down collar unbuttoned only works if it looks as though you were too busy, or just didn’t care enough to button it when you threw it on in the morning. If the rest of your outfit is too polished, you’ll just look affected.

Pocket Square

Fewer men are finding a need for pocket squares nowadays – they’re often an unnecessary fad in a menswear world of tracksuits and limited-run sneakers.

But, for a sprezzatura-inspired look, they can add wonders to a suit. The pop of colour from your chest pocket can be your point of difference; just remember not to match your tie and just throw it in there and go.

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viralhottopics · 8 years

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Whats next for the womens movement?

After the success of the Womens March, its International Womens Day on Wednesday 8 March. Here, 15 influential women, from Lena Dunham and Nicola Sturgeon to Susie Orbach, nominate a crucial next step towards equality

Lena Dunham: keep on protesting

I think the activism and organisation thats happening now is showing protest matters, calling your representatives matters, becoming involved in community organisations matters, sending your donations every month matters. It has never mattered more to show up with your money, with your body, with your time and with your voice than it does right now. Lots of people had valid criticisms of the Womens March, but it was the largest global protest weve seen and thats because every single person made the choice to take time off work, to give of themselves, to give their bodies and fill space and show they wanted to say no. That scares people and even if right now were not seeing the result we want, the government has been warned. They understand they are not supported. They are fighting an uphill battle against women and allies of equality in all of its forms. Lena Dunham is an actor, writer, producer and director

Nicola Sturgeon: great childcare is where it starts

Its a source of frustration that, decades on from legislation that was supposed to pave the way for equality of the sexes, too many gaps remain. I have made equality a key feature of my government, with a gender-balanced cabinet, one of very few in the developed world.

However, if there is one specific policy area which can permanently advance the cause of gender equality, I believe the answer lies not in the workplace itself, but in the early years. Delivering high quality childcare as widely as possible is, I believe, fundamental to achieving the kind of equal society that empowers women.

It is a simple fact that, for many women, the barrier to career advancement comes when they are faced with juggling the competing demands of a job and raising a family. And in too many cases, the lack of adequate childcare becomes a decisive factor in preventing women from continuing their careers.

Improving access and affordability in childcare is not an easy challenge and of itself will not solve all gender equality issues. But it is a challenge which must be met if we are to deliver a society which truly has equality of opportunity for men and women. Nicola Sturgeon MSP is First Minister of Scotland

Signs of the times: protesters on the Womens March in London take a breather. Photograph: Dan Kitwood/Getty Images

Naheed Farid: introduce bottom to top economic development

I represent women in the Afghanistan parliament, in a country that is one of the worst places to live as a woman. We suffer from violence, insecurity and lack of access to basic rights, such as education and health. We tried many things, such as investing in civil society organisations, education and democratic processes, but still Afghanistan stays the same. My analysis is that in order to ensure womens rights and equality in Afghanistan, and generally all around the world, we need to involve women in the production process, empowering women economically. We also need policies to make sure that the process of development is bottom to top, completely the opposite of what is practised right now. Womens inclusion in political, economic and social aspects of development can stabilise society by consistently empowering women and involving them in high-level decision-making processes. Naheed Farid was elected MP in 2010 at the age of 27

Nomboniso Gasa: civil action to defend our freedom from misogynistic world leaders

As I watched Donald Trumps inauguration, I noticed something familiar in the body language between him and Melania. My mind flipped back to President Jacob Zumas inauguration in 2009. He didnt even look back to see whether his wife was comfortable. She trotted behind, with shoes that were too big for her. She could have tripped and he would not have noticed.

People have written about Trump and Zumas disdain for the judiciary, the constitution, media and civil liberties. But they are similar in other ways, including their public devaluing of women. Trumps tape about women throwing themselves at you, if you are famous, reminded me of Zumas statement when accused of rape. I am not afraid of women. They are attracted to me. Why would I rape? Zuma must be envying Trump, though. He is unable to reverse the Constitutional Court decision enabling women to make choices about reproductive rights, bodily integrity and freedom of choice. His ANC is unlikely to garner enough votes to change the Bill of Rights.

Contesting these men requires a careful unmasking of their devious narratives, combined with civic action in defence of our freedoms. This must be a well-planned and sustained struggle against misogynistic bullies. Nomboniso Gasa is a South African researcher, writer and analyst on land, politics, gender and cultural issues

Laura Bates: sex and relationships education for all schoolchildren

There is a single, clear action that experts agree could make a substantial difference. For the past decade, campaigners, teachers, parents and pupils alike have urged successive governments to implement compulsory sex and relationships education (SRE) for all young people, including topics such as consent, healthy relationships, pornography, gender stereotypes and LGBT rights and relationships. Schools are currently only obliged to teach the biological basics of reproduction by the age of 15, with no compulsory coverage of issues, such as consent.

This would help protect vulnerable children who may already be experiencing sexual abuse. It would create change for the many girls who report unwanted sexual touching a form of sexual assault. And, by educating young people about their rights and responsibilities, it could have an impact on the broader problem of sexual violence. With 85,000 women raped annually and two women per week killed by a current or former partner in England and Wales, this is an urgent priority.

We know that young people today face a bombardment of influences, from sexting to pornography. If we teach children how to read maps so they can find their way, and how to do maths so they can work out their change in a shop, why do we leave them shockingly ill-equipped to navigate sexual relationships, a similarly universal life experience? With 43% of young people reporting they dont receive any SRE at all, we are failing them and letting wider society down as well. Laura Bates is founder of the Everyday Sexism Project

Join the gang: women hold hands and share personal stories during the Dress Like A Woman rally and march, held to support womens rights and to protest against Donald Trump, in Seattle. Photograph: David Ryder/Reuters

Anne-Marie Imafidon: more women in science and tech jobs reflected in TV soaps

Ive always watched a lot of TV and when I was younger watched EastEnders. As an east Londoner it felt close enough to reality that I would get excited when they filmed on location trying to point out landmarks and guess the road. Soaps dont fully reflect reality, but they do try to stay current. These days most characters have a mobile phone and technology sometimes features in storylines.

In the battle for gender equality Id like to see the soaps embrace some new careers for their characters particularly the female ones.

Wheres Dot?

Oh, shes just taking air quality measurements in the square for her PhD thesis, shell meet us at the Queen Vic.

Normalising science and tech-related careers can start with a female character or two deciding to leave work at the chippy for a job at a digital start-up. Someone in Hollyoaks might strike up an affair with someone theyve met on an evening coding course (affairs happen all the time on soaps). Seeing these characters have breakfast, and fight with family while enjoying science, technology, engineering and mathematics (Stem) careers will work against the one-sided portrayals of Stem characters that we see in films and on TV. The small screen can do what Hollywood is beginning to do with films, like Hidden Figures the story of African-American women who helped Nasa. Anne-Marie Imafidon MBE campaigns to get women into science, technology, engineering and maths

Li Maizi: create an international force against the censoring of womens voices

The answer for me is chasing gender equality in China. It has become my daily life, making noises against all the discrimination. And when we meet the backlash, we have to stand together and fight back. As a woman, I have no country: my country is the whole world. So I will also criticise Donald Trump, who is a straight man cancer.

In China, the space for civil movement is becoming more narrow. One of the most powerful Weibo [Chinas Twitter] accounts, Feminism Voice, has been blocked for publishing an article about the planned womens strike against Trump in the US. Thus, no single issue belongs to one country, we must fight together against the censoring of womens voices. Li Maizi is one of Chinas feminist five, detained for more than a month in 2015 for organising a protest against sexual harassment on buses and subways

Catherine Mayer: champion more shared parenting

Theres no single fix because the mechanisms keeping women down are intertwined. However, one of the seven core objectives of the Womens Equality Party equal parenting and caregiving is capable on its own of creating huge change. If we can shake the idea that childcare is primarily a mothers responsibility, if we learn to value the unpaid labour now primarily undertaken by women, then we also unpick some of the causes of the gender pay gap. There are also ways to speed the process. In 1975, when 90% of Icelandic women left jobs and homes for the day, their male compatriots learned just how much women do. Iceland now ranks as the worlds most gender-equal country. Im helping to organise a Womens Day Off in the UK next year. Catherine Mayer is the co-founder of the Womens Equality Party and author of Attack of the Fifty Foot Women: How Gender Equality Can Save the World!

Magic circle: protesters chant against gender-based violence at their camp on La Puerta del Sol square in Madrid, Spain. Photograph: EPA

Stella Creasy: dont be a click-avist, get stuck in

The change we need to make is mobilisation. We have to sound the alarm. The worst thing we can do is despair. My message is, dont stand aside, get stuck in. Dont be a click-avist. Keep asking: What next? If you go on a march and think: Thats the job done, they win. A backlash is a reaction, so we have to keep taking action. I keep saying to people, I adore Martin Luther King, but he was wrong when he said: The arc of the moral universe is long, but it bends towards progress. It doesnt, unless you fight for it. Stella Creasy is MP for Walthamstow. Join her Feminist Action Network ([email protected])

Liv Little: economic autonomy for women of colour

The face of feminism Im surrounded by is young and fresh. Feminism has the potential to be a bright, vibrant movement. But its difficult. There are so many pressing issues for women. Whats really important is economic empowerment. I think as a woman of colour its important that we are running our own businesses, able to support each other and generating our own income to support other young women of colour who are coming up in the world. As a black female graduate youre likely to earn a lot less than your white male counterparts. Youre increasingly seeing women of colour in positions of power, but there are still not enough of us in prominent positions. Liv Little is editor-in-chief at gal-dem

Caitlin Moran: embrace our weakness and silliness

You know what make us strong? All the things you think are a hindrance. Our strength is our weakness. Our love of silly things to wear. Our love of jokes. On the Womens March, there were millions of weak women with buggies, with elderly relatives women who are disabled, or from minority groups wearing pink hats and holding placards. And our strength is, you cant send armed police into a crowd like that. Theres no way to spin that footage. You cant pretend its violent, radical extremists. Theres no excuse to break it up. The weaker, sillier and funnier we are, the more impossible it is to demonise us, or stop us, as so many protests have been stopped and demonised before. As things go backwards, we think: We cant fight this, and the answer is we mustnt fight it.

Fighting is how its always been done before. They know how to stop fighters. But these old, white, straight, angry men? They dont know how to stop joy, humour, knitted pink hats and buggies. We are the force theyve never seen before. They have nothing in their box to counter this. This is our strength. And we have it in endless amounts. We are the 52%. And we can knit and joke the fuck out of the revolution. Caitlin Moran is an author and columnist

Stepping up: women on the march in Montevideo, Uruguay. Photograph: Raul Martinez/EPA

Susie Orbach: defeat the merchants of body hatred

In a time of threat, the places we might be able to call home, our bodies, are being ripped apart by commercial pressures. They bear down on labias (too messy), faces (too tired), lips (too small), eyes (too hooded), breasts (too small, droopy or large) For each of these crazy designations, there are surgeries sold as empowering, sold as safe, sold as solutions. But whats the problem and who is generating it? Control girls and womens bodies whether by the purveyors of beauty, the cultural enforcers of female genital cutting, the anti-choice gang in the White House and insecurity is induced. Give girls as young as three cosmetic surgery games that divert their dreaming and imaginative energy into pursuits that hurt what it means to be a girl, and you ensure big profits and big body preoccupations for a lifetime. Its time to dare to feel OK in our bodies as they age and change. Susie Orbach is a psychotherapist, analyst and writer

Paris Lees: real feminism excludes nobody

If your push for social justice excludes women of colour or disabled women, trans women, sex workers, Muslims, Jews, poor people you dont want equality, you want privilege. Promoting women of the same class and colour while ignoring and speaking over women less privileged than yourself isnt feminism. Its supremacism. I come from a mixed-race family. I like to think I know a little bit about racism. But Im not black. So I listen. I follow feminists from minority backgrounds on social media: Reni Eddo-Lodge, Nesrine Malik, Janet Mock, Phyll Opoku-Gyimah, Fatima Manji, Roxane Gay. Most women voted for Hillary in the US election, but a significant proportion white women without a college degree voted for Trump. In the end, their votes swung it. This is what can happen when women dont pull together. So lets pull together. Fascism is back. Women are leading the resistance, but if we really want decency to prevail, its time to revive another idea from the mists of time: solidarity. Paris Lees is a journalist and transgender rights activist

Getting the message: a wall of signs outside the White House in Washington. Photograph: John Minchillo/AP

Mariella Frostrup: include boys in the conversation

Ive been a feminist since my lungs first filled with air, but Im weary of war and eager for a coalition. In my small corner of the western world its hard to find a man who doesnt believe his daughter, his wife, his sister, his mother or his colleagues to be his equal, yet we continue to mark out our battle lines on a gendered basis. No social revolution in the history of mankind has succeeded without the participation of both sexes so its time to invite the guys aboard. Instead of car ads that accept a woman can control a vehicle (doh!) Im more hopeful for one that entices a man to try a vacuum cleaner. Our ability to participate in a mans world is beyond dispute, but the jurys still out on our success in enticing men into what was once our domain. The proportion of women doing the worlds unpaid work has barely changed. The only difference is that most women today are holding down two jobs. It is stress levels, not our incomes, that are rising. Expectations of both sexes have changed beyond measure and the conversation needs to stop being so one-sided, which is why weve set up Great Men, opening conversations with boys in secondary schools exploring masculinity and gender issues. If we want to eradicate misogyny, we need to make sure boys are given the support and emotional investment they need. Mariella Frostrup is a broadcaster, columnist and co-founder of the Great Initiative

Lisa Randall: end the fear women feel

An issue for women throughout the world that is implicitly played down by lack of adequate attention is fear. The topic is broad and the specifics are difficult to address through existing systems, but whether it is physical violence, online stalking, harassment, or unwanted encounters at work or in schools, women are prevented from living their best possible lives and from contributing in the most significant ways. Current systems address only very explicit danger. Even when the attacks are merely upsetting, the resultant loss of diverse voices online and elsewhere because of womens reluctance to be subject to insults or insinuations, is a loss to us all. Lisa Randall is professor of science at Harvard University