#because a part of me feels like I’m never going to feel that undiluted childlike joy ever again
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like I’ve been generally fine in my teenage years (no more unhappier than from the average dose of teen angst) but man do I miss the excitement I’d get from those fantasy Geronimo Stilton books
#like my worldview on life was so different then#Obv it was Pri school so it was more chill (I was arguably too chill and messed up my psle)#But you know what I’m actually so fine w that! I’m happy that at least in some point in my life studies weren’t hanging over my head#Like a guillotine#And I would find so much joy in the little things like hell yeah new book!!!#because a part of me feels like I’m never going to feel that undiluted childlike joy ever again#And I’ve killed myself so much on every exam since#baby me deserved to have a little happiness in her life#I still think 12 is way too young for the first major board exam#Esp one so heavily surrounded by stigmas/reputation/prestige of the school you get into#like you’re setting a child up for the rest of their life and they’re not even a teen yet#thankfully it’s gotten a lot better (in terms of tangible change in sg societys mindset)#but god was it brutal for me in 2018/2019#anyways trip down memory lane over heheh
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