#be mature or don't get involved
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trials-of-a-spirit-worker · 4 months ago
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Same for women as well. Cause I've seen it/heard it from women. Just anyone.
"That's another bitch's child." "Baby mama drama"
Maybe so but right now you're fucking the other parent so... Mature up and just be a godsdamned friend to the kid?!?!
If you're getting involved with someone who has children understand that if you want to be serious with them that child/those children are going to be involved.
Hell, they might actually love you like a parent anyway. Kids get attached fairly quickly and they're highly observant. If you're not even considering the possibility of nurturing that kid if you and this partner get married, don't bother getting involved in their lives. Point blank.
I think dudes who say shit like “I couldn’t love a child that wasn’t mine” shouldn’t have kids
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awkwardrocker · 3 days ago
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I need everyone upset about Liam's promotion to understand that it had nothing to do with him being better/worse than Yuki. Yuki outperformed him. Yuki deserved the chance. BUT Yuki is not a Redbull driver. He is a Honda driver. He has no loyalty to Redbull and that is why he did not get a chance next to Max. It's not that he didn't deserve it. It's pure business.
Redbull are ending their relationship with Honda. They are creating their own engines. It's likely seen as a big liability to Redbull to have Yuki actively involved in any tests or even near anything involving the 2026 engine.
This is not an attack on Yuki or his character or anything like that, so please do not take it that way. But, Yuki's loyalty to a different engine manufacturer is a major risk to any new manufacturer like the Ford/Redbull powertrain. You just never know. I'm not saying he doesn't deserve a good drive, but Yuki's loyalty will forever be to Honda (as it should) and that poses a lot of risks for Redbull.
Once again, I am not commenting on Yuki's character or making assumptions about him when I say this, but there are a lot of big concerns if he gets promoted. He could ditch them for Aston immediately because Honda asks, he could share information about the new engine to Honda, or he could give questionable feedback that negatively impacts the new powertrain. Maybe he wouldn't do these things. But if there's even the most miniscule potential that he could, it would make any team hesitant. F1 is rampant with cheating allegations and questionable tactics to win. The teams will want to protect themselves in any eventuality. And that is what's working against Yuki so greatly.
Yuki has proven to be a very competent driver over the past year, but let's not forget that he nearly lost his seat in 2023 and the rumored reason he stayed is due to Honda. He owes his career to Honda, not Redbull. And at the end of the day, that's his main flaw within this team. It's not his driving. It's not his temper. It's not anything else. It's purely who he is aligned to poltically in the racing world. Is that fair? No. Is that how racing works? Unfortunately, yes.
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cinamun · 1 year ago
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Even if you block me for very teeny tiny, itsy bitsy reasons (and subsequently follow me from a burner account because you like my story), if you make cute shit, I'm going to download it.
I don't know how anyone can block me anyway! I just call out anti-Blackness quarterly, geek out about old people music and am well versed in the brain development of 19 to 24 year olds.
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But its your blog, do you, I love you and happy new year!
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insert-funny-url-here · 7 months ago
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Hey random life pro tip but you can and should always examine your thoughts, opinions, beliefs, and assumptions because they all come from somewhere. ESPECIALLY the ones you take for granted. It can be super helpful to just get a little curious and ask yourself "hm. That's interesting. Where did I learn that?" (The answer is usually your parents/family or culture/society/religion).
For example, if you feel worthless because you don't have a job, take a moment to think about where you learned that you need a job to be a valuable member of humanity. That idea didn't come out of nowhere. It probably came from being raised in a capitalist society built on the Protestant work ethic. This also applies to ideas like "I'm boring" or "I'm ugly" or "nobody likes/loves me" or "nobody will like me if I x" or "I have to do x or else y" or "x people are y" or really any other thought/belief.
Importantly, you should not shame or judge yourself when you realize that some of your thoughts/beliefs may have come from somewhere you *really* disagree with. I think this happens a lot for folks who leave a religion or political party and keep some lingering values like purity, keeping up appearances, and needing to atone for "sin". There's nothing to be ashamed of during this process because it's our weird, squishy brains that hold onto values so tightly without us necessarily consciously knowing that it's happening. Our brains don't come ready-made with the ability to disentangle your more conscious beliefs that you may have fully abandoned from less conscious ones that you've perhaps never noticed without conscious effort. When you notice these things, simply acknowledge them, label them, and ask yourself questions about where they came from and if you truly do believe them and why.
This is a continuous process that can take someone's whole life, because we are constantly picking up messages from others around us about how we as human animals "MUST" live in this world. I'm not going to lie and say this is an easy process to go through because you will likely be tempted to feel guilty and ashamed about holding beliefs that don't like up with your actual values, but just remember that it ALWAYS makes sense why/how you got to this point. We are all products of our genetics, relationships, and life experiences, and if you work hard enough and have enough information, you can track down where all the different parts of you came from. I would also highly recommend getting yourself set up with a counselor who you like and trust because they can help you work through disentangling these things without shame.
REEXAMINE YOUR BELIEFS ALWAYS. YOUR THOUGHTS ARE NOT REALITY, THEY ARE JUST THOUGHTS MADE BY YOUR SQUISHY ELECTRIC MEAT.
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dirkxcaliborn · 6 months ago
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I love you media that doesn't romanticize forgiving abusive family
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coffehbeans · 1 year ago
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In regards to the post where you stated that you were getting a bit tired of gt, maybe its with the community? I've been in the gt community for a couple years now, and I've observed it to be... Not as great when I joined. For one, its become way too oversaturated with the same types of tropes and style of writing (fluff mostly), and two, its seemingly hostile towards anything that isn't what saturates the community. It also has a terrible relationship towards writers and I'm not pull out that particular drama (even though its pretty damning), its just that very few stories and creators get the attention and interaction they deserve. Whether it be because people can't be bothered to take a few minutes to read a story, or it goes against the fluff norm.
I especially felt you when you said you got annoyed by the posts where 'oh it would be so cool if I was tiny' like wow... Nobody's said that before (they have, over and over and over and over-). The g/t community is deceptive because initially you think it'll be great because its relatively small and you all like this odd genre of media that you'd think everyone would just get along. Because we're all weirdos. But nope, the community can be just as toxic, just as uninviting, and just as hostile as other fandoms.
Of course, take everything I say with a grain of salt. I've only been here for two years, and these are my observations which have come not only from my own eyes but others I've interacted. I could be completely right or completely wrong. Who knows. Just wanted to say you're not alone in being tired of g/t.
Thanks for such a long ask! I share a lot of the feelings you have here. Although for me I don't think the g/t community is toxic at all. Drama will continue to happen as humans will remain being humans. But with the other aspects I totally agree with you.
I'm in the g/t fandom for five years now. Back then, it peaked at deviantart. Stories and writing were the main g/t content, but I don't remember if there were interactions or not. But I still say the time g/t was brimming with good content was ack at deviantart, and the countless groups and content. It was so good.
It seems that over the years people stopped reading or something, because it's very difficult to get a lot of notes on your writing. And I say this not referring to me, but to the other writers I follow. I try to at least leave a nice comment in the tags or something, but usually I'm part of the few people that do this. I say that nowadays writing g/t stories is the same as talking to a brick wall.
And the take I most agree with you, is the oversaturation. Oh gosh. The same stuff being repeated over and over and over. And only fluff, and only wishing to be tiny, and I'm tired. Sorry if people are having fun, it's just that these aren't the reason I personally like g/t and seeing the same boring fluff stuff for the milionth time and getting 500 notes is, tiring. I enjoy fluff but gosh, is that really all that people can come up with? Where's the interesting stuff, you know?
Also over the years I really felt the age difference. I'm not part of the majority of the demographic that composes this fandom and gosh, I feel it. The stories I find, when they're not from my usual favorite authors, are immature and childish. The posts are the same stuff, written in a way that I can see is from a 14-16 year old. Again, nothing wrong with that, but I can't relate to these types of content like I used to when I was that age.
So for me, anon, it's not about toxicity (I think the g/t fandom is very healthy). For me is that I really started to feel the age difference between me and most of the community, since I don't find the content that tackles the subjects I'm interested in (which are usually kinda deep and definitely not the fluff and jokes we get everyday).
Thanks again for the ask!
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shivasdarknight · 1 year ago
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Hi, sorry for this but you are a writer, so umm.. I was hoping you could give me some tips/advice on how to write?
tbh the way I got into writing is a bit insane, but I do have some advice that can help. gonna put it under a cut just because it got kinda long
honest to god, one of the best pieces of advice is something you're already doing because reading can genuinely help you with becoming a better writer. stepping outside of your usual genres or authors can help expand your viewpoint and introduce you to more narrative styles so you can play around and see what works for you. eg. if you mostly read first person, give second person a shot. or if you're an omniscient third person, try limited third person. or even retrospective first person, because i often see people complain about first person pov when it's married with a present tense story. if you have a first person narrator talking about events in the past as if talking to you, or a journal it often takes an entirely different angle and it's something I've played with in Homestuck fics because that fandom tends to be more open to narrative experimentation. Writing is honestly a lot of looking at stuff you like (much like art) and smooshing it all together. Personally, I've gotten a lot of my writing style from stuff like The Locked Tomb, admittedly Lovecraft was foundational (but this is a great example of why to always remain critical considering his bullshit), so was Homestuck and Rick Riordan's stuff. I'm never trying to copy them wholesale, but I am looking at aspects I like - such as Riordan's humor intertwining with the narrative and narration, or the deeply unreliable narrators that Muir writes, or even how Homestuck balances purple prose with gut wrenching conciseness when it counts. A lot of modern day fast food fiction takes out a lot of the stuff that actually builds a story - pacing, playing with narration and technical writing - so you need to be conscious of what you're looking for in things. Often more established authors get to do weirder stuff than new authors, but don't discredit new ones because that would be leaving out folks like Xiran Jay Zhao and their phenomenal prose.
Another thing that helps greatly is reading writing critique. Video essays on books or even more critical thought pieces on writing, tropes, etc. can help you learn more about why something works. Lots of different channels on YouTube dedicated to dissecting media, absolutely recommend stuff like Hello Future Me, Overly Sarcastic Productions (real world ties + mythology, great basis to build things on), Zoe Bee (writer + commentary), Nerdwriter1 (media analysis + commentary), Just Write, and Tale Foundry. For adjacent suggestions that can help build up alternate perspectives that aren't directly about writing but are about critical thinking with stories (which is frankly an important skill to have), I definitely recommend Princess Weekes, Accented Cinema, Now You See It, Dominic Noble, The Storyteller, and Pop Culture Detective. A lot of this is discussing film (save Dominic Noble, who also talks about books a Lot), but the core essence of storytelling is helpful regardless of what angle it comes in - be it video game, movie, tv, or book reviews and analyses.
Actual writing. Varies on the person on if they do outlines or not and how, but I still recommend trying to do an outline when you're first starting out. One habit to immediately knock yourself out of is writing things chronologically. If you're working on a big piece and have more energy to write something in the middle? Put that in a new doc and leave a placeholder for where you're at. Legitimately, getting words on the paper is more important than those words being good. Because you can always come back and edit things to make sense.
Always edit what you write. I hate the "no beta we die like real men" attitude because people will dunk on editing but then praise stories for having "firm and satisfying" connections which can only really be built through editing. Your first draft is your rough idea. Your second one is when you read through and have it make sense. Three is making that make sense, and maybe 4 is more just grammar and spelling errors. Edit as many times necessary to make sure you like it.
Always work in broad strokes, then move in finer like with anything. Do a general idea for a story, then your main story beats, then how you connect them together, and then the nitty gritty of each. Keep lots of notes - do not rely on your head solely for everything - and just also be willing to let things go if they change.
What I tend to do when I write is I want a good flow. I often get that from reading my writing out loud to hear how it sounds, but I'm looking for a good beat to read along. Because even if the sentence is grammatically correct and structurally sound, it may not be very interesting to read. Like you could say someone feigned a polite expression to not let the other person know that they didn't feel comfortable with a topic, or you could go the angle I went with recently of "she painted herself an interested expression to wear as dread began to gnaw at her gut." Sometimes the more colorful or out there the language is, the better it sounds when you read it. Like instead of saying "that's just how things go for them" you could say, "but Fate had a funny way of making her disdain known for (X character)". And this is where reading other peoples' work comes in real handy because you can get a lot of examples of how people write things.
I also try and reflect themes of the story into the writing itself, like this section of a draft:
Still nothing.  Seemed he wasn’t going to bother with a glass, instead just ripping the top off of some bottle of gin and tipping it back with little regard for himself. Still that chronometer ticked on; still that taught tension like another arrow had been drawn.  A million and more things flooded Ysayle’s mind, itching to loose them at Estinien, yet found herself stuck in indecision as she stared daggers into him - ever her opposite as he just seemed despondent.  The gin bottle hit the extended shelf loudly; one hand a fist around the bottle, the other balled up on the surface - knuckles as white as bone. Still, Estinien said naught. Still, the chronometer ticked on. Still, Ysayle’s heart roared in her ears - poisonous words damming up her throat.
The theme of this story is avoiding the mistakes of the past. How things often can wind up cyclical, and the goal is to break from those cycles and repeats. So naturally, several points of the narration itself repeat itself. This isn't standard writing style, but it gets that point across by repeating "Still" as the scene crawls on. I also use a lot of alliteration in my writing because I personally find it fun? So "a maddening matter made most malign", for example.
It also helps to change up how you write or what descriptors you use based on the character whose head you're in, even if it's third person. Third person can have a voice and I often use it to speak aloud a character's thoughts instead of relying on italicized dialogue-thoughts. It makes the dialogue-thoughts appearing hit more when they do instead of just having to be subjected to internal ramblings constantly. Like in this fic I just published:
“...Can we talk about it on the morn?” “What for?” You don’t know what it is you ask of me. “Tired,” Estinien said with a shrug. “We’ve morning patrol, remember?”
Compared to this fic:
“Yes, confusingly.”  Her tone was flat as she leaned once again on Surkukteni’s shoulder, thankfully on the uninjured side.  “I fear I may have been wrong, though I truly doubt it.  To deny me twice, then throw a fit?  I wonder — why didn’t you go through with it?” Not even Surkukteni had that answer.  For the umpteenth time during that conversation, she refused to look at Her Darkness.  That desire — twisted and poisoned as it was — was one that still surfaced from time to time, yet like clockwork made her ill and was banished from her thoughts.  Why was that?  She felt scorned back then, wishing the universe would correct this error in sparing him but taking Ysayle — but was she not the one who helped save him?  Who helped tear those eyes from his armor?  She easily could — and had previously — bluffed that it was to destroy the eyes and be rid of the threat, but given her hesitancy now? Why?
All of Surkukteni's thoughts are condensed into the narration so that I can separate out her thought dialogue from idle musings since she - specifically - has a connection with something that can talk telepathically. This thing comments on the literal narration of the story, so when she's directly addressing this thing it's thought-dialogue. But her actual thoughts become narration to avoid spending too much time with that, as I find it's better used sparingly.
Motivation for writing is probably the hardest thing, and best I can advise is to get really into critiquing the stuff you like because you wind up finding a lot of material in fix-it stuff, or just wanting to see more of stuff like you. It's part of what drives my xiv stuff due to how they treat female characters, and I really just wanna see more sapphic bi4bi. So considering it's something I've been stuck in for a very long time now and really like the ambient lore and wish it would do better, it's fueling my desire to write. And from there, there are so many other angles to take - like building ocs, building lore. Finding a sandbox is genuinely one of the best ways to do it. Again, like. You'd be surprised at how much is there because of spite. LOTR has Eowyn because Tolkien didn't like that the "can be killed by no man" thing in Macbeth was resolved with a character born by c-section, so he instead wrote Eowyn, the woman who killed the Witch-King of Angmar. C.S. Lewis didn't like the fact that Tolkien believed that modern technology - or slightly less modern technology - didn't believe in fantasy and he explicitly cited lampposts. And this is why there's just a random light post in the middle of nowhere in the Narnia books.
Critique is good and healthy. I'm critical with the stuff I like and my own things so I can work on them and myself. It's fine to like something that you don't wholly agree with, especially if you're using it to inform how you build on it or build your own things. Like I dunno, I looked at Dante from Devil May Cry and went "what if he was trans" and now I've got Rhombi, a character who has stepped really far away from the OG Dante mould, but you can still see hints of it as I used what I wanted to see out of DMC to build this bisexual disaster of a guy. I was disappointed by Elsword not really committing to some of their character concepts, so I kinda just took Eve (and admittedly Add) and made them into Celes and Neilos and took them to their logical conclusions. All three of them were originally fantrolls at some point, so most of the heavy lifting was done when I was back in Homestuck and all I had to do was scrub the barcodes off of them to build them up in an original verse.
Chemistry is also crucial. If characters aren't vibing, move on. Do not force it. Good chemistry can save a bad story (eg. FFXV) and bad chemistry can ruin a good story. Often it's the characters that drive a story so you need to do a lot of plotting and planning. Most writing is honestly just planning before putting the words down.
And I'm very much so rambling by now but my main points are these (+ others I'm realizing while typing):
Plot a Lot and keep lots of notes, and also organize those notes. The contents don't have to be pretty, but you'll thank yourself in advance if you at least sort them by core idea
Getting words down is more important than getting them down correctly. You can always come back and edit it when you have an idea of how to make it work
You can always place a [insert scene here] tag so you can keep your flow and don't get caught on something.
You also don't have to write chronologically - you wanna write the big confession scene before the intro? do it! just jump right into it!
also don't be afraid to delete stuff or remove it from your draft. save things for later to see if they work elsewhere, because maybe it could be a better spinoff.
dont listen to the advice of "if it really matters, you'll remember it in the morning" that advice was given by neurotypicals who don't have memory issues. make notes of EVERYTHING and then delete the ones that don't work
sometimes writing by hand vs computer can really make a difference in how you think. handwriting is slower and makes you think about stuff, so you may want to keep journals for random snippets or ideas like how doodling is good for building up your habit of drawing
Outlines can help but how you outline is up to you. Try a few styles out and go with what works best.
I cannot stress enough that having something like a marker board to write out your broad stroke story ideas is really really nice
Broad strokes first, then narrow it further and further down. Don't get wrapped up in the nitty gritty details
Chemistry is crucial and can often save a piece you're not fully feeling.
Read your stuff out loud while editing because it can help point out stuff that's not jiving! I find it helps a lot with dialogue
Read a lot. Listen to critique. Be more critical. Also don't limit your idea of stories to just books - expand the media you consume and you'll find really interesting stories that can help with yours
Don't be afraid to use tropes, but also don't super rely on them to where you're just checking off boxes instead of coming up with natural scenarios built on chemistry (eg. having the nerdy goth girl is fine, but the way the trope ends in most media ("fixing" her or just having her be a quirky cynical critic) may not fit with your story and it may be better to see how the story plays out rather than forcing it into something it's not)
Iron Widow is a good example here: the relationship between Zetian and Yizhi is pre-established and comes off as sort of "boy next door" vibes, or at least the very dedicated childhood friend. It quickly becomes apparent that he's as much a co-conspirator in her plans as Shimin is. The guy can be ruthless when given the chance, and that's how Yizhi goes beyond the initial trope and defines himself outside of it. Same with the contextualization of Shimin's seeming "aggression" as the "bad boy" and figuring out where that problem/persona actually stems from, and then the shift of viewing it as less aggression and more retaliation and self preservation.
Find something you do really want to write about, like filling a void in a piece of media you like or doing a take on media that made you mad or disappointed. Jane Eyre is technically fanfiction because the author wanted to see more of Jane and didn't get that. The Divine Comedy is self insert fanfiction of Dante Alighieri as he does worldbuilding with Christian mythos regarding heaven and hell. The Riordan verse is his interest in mythology crossed with a desire to give his son a protag that was like him (specifically ADHD and dyslexic), which then became wanting to let kids see themselves in the different halfbloods in the series.
There's a lot of ways you can get started writing, but the best way is to just write goofy stuff for yourself. Get out stuff that may look bad at first, but you go back and read it and critique it. Just getting yourself into the habit of writing helps a lot, because again: it matters less about the quality, and more getting it on the page and actually having something. You can always fine-tune writing, after all.
My first FFXIV fic isn't actually even published. It was just me writing something rambly about my Warrior of Light when I was starting to figure her character out. It looks nothing like what I'm doing now in part because that fanfiction became a launching point for me to work on others. I've got a lot of drafts that will never see the light of day because these were proto-concepts that became the stuff I wound up publishing. It's fine to have drafts that remain drafts because you can take that as practice, and practice is good. Anything that you write has value because you can use it to let your technical writing skills mature.
Also, don't be afraid to look for help. There are beta services on tumblr (or at least used to be when I was a teenager), plenty of writing guides or places set up to ask questions, plenty of youtubers that give prompts for you to work with. The hardest part is always getting started. But once you get past the awkwardness of the start, everything just falls into place and gets easier the longer you go at it.
You definitely have the desire for it because I've seen your very deep love of literature through the Bi-Library, so you can definitely become a strong writer if you put your mind to it 🫶 Find something to fix or address, and that usually is what gets the ball rolling. Worldbuilding is fun and can lead to something, but you can't have a well built world without a story to explore it.
Characters drive story, story is how you explore themes and the world itself, and the world itself is built on your experiences and interests. Embrace the fact that this is coming from your lens and experiences, because no media is truly void of the author and its other creators. Embrace that fact and use it as an extension of yourself. But really, just write. Literally anything. Just get into the habit of writing, and it'll progress from there!
#original#asks#answered#bisexual-coala#writing tips#long post#this is very rambly but getting into writing isnt the most straightforward thing#a lot of the time it really is just finding something that clicks and not caring about what goes on the page for the first draft#ive been writing fanfiction for...over a decade now? + a lot of rp (also over a decade) and now some p serious original stuff#my fanfiction has also gotten way more involved than it used to be#genuinely i got started writing by keeping a lot of journals and writing every idea i had even if im now embarrassed by it#what matters is just getting into the habit first and then looking at your stuff more critically once the habit is formed#it's hard to build a habit if you're immediately critical#but it's hard to maintain a habit or hobby if you're not - especially if you feel you can build on something#if you do feel it you oughta pursue it and see where it takes you#perfectly fine to not be critical with hobbies but being Constructively critical is how you improve and mature#constructive is key here. because being down on your own writing or being self deprecating is how you lose a hobby#like let's say you don't like your dialogue#go read scripts or books of stuff you like the dialogue from. analyze why they work in contrast to why you feel like yours doesnt work#maybe someone else has a solution for why it feels off#sometimes it's just as simple as taking a step back and looking at it as a whole or even just sleeping on it and coming back w fresh eyes#always approach something you don't like about your work with the attitude of ''how can i improve so i do like it''#like ''i need to be better at fight scenes. ill be sure to include more in my next piece to focus on it and maybe read some action books''#lotta ways to do it!! theres no one right way just a way that fits best for you!!!#just absolutely ignore the ''if it's a good idea you'll remember it in the morning'' stuff.#it doesn't account for people w memory issues and will screw you over#you do not have to wait until you're good at writing to start working on something. you need something to work on to improve#you can always come back to an idea as many times as you need as you grow as a writer#so just write until you build a habit and base style then analyze and move from there#fanfic is honestly really good for practicing style and technique - the characters and world are already ther so why not use em?
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kaistrashbin · 10 months ago
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Now hol’up! Valentine Anon is taking all the fun- but they did miss one thing- all their talk about bites and lips on your shoulders and torso but… what about your thighs, hm gorgeous? With gentle nails stroking along your femoral artery, savouring the intimate trust to be so close to such a sensitive area. I’m sure you’re more of a thighs girlie anyways, right?
Oop right- a name! What’s a good one to hear your pretty voice say while I’m drawing circles with my finger along your inner thigh? Hmmmm do you want to decide?
WHO- DUDE THIS ASK- WHAT IS GOING. ON, HOW DO I EVEN TAG THIS
I'm out, bye
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makshu · 11 months ago
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I've sometimes seen people saying about AidaIro's favoritism over Tsukasa and how his character can be broken because he's too strong. To be very honest, using my rational side, I agree that this can be extremely annoying, especially when he's not on the list of characters you like, but on my emotional side... I just love it
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assmaster-8000 · 1 year ago
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Those were all hallucinations because if you're patient rook he'll be the best lover anyone could have he'd take you out to the sweetest dates they feel like you're living a fairy tale, as soon as 12 am hits on your anniversary he'll be awake, just to kiss your face and hold you tightly, it's important to him even if he knows you don't realize it's happening, and once you do wake up you wake up to the sweetest man to ever exist he won't leave your side at all in that day he couldn't bear to do so, that's why he makes sure to clear up everything in his schedule two weeks before. he'd want to travel the world by your side, take you to experiences he knows you'll never forget and cherish forever he wants you to be by his side at all times of his life he can't imagine how he'd be had you not stayed by his side despite his flaws
ur so sweet aster it'd almost be inconceivable if there were ever a situation else wise 😵
for realsies though i may be an easily irritated person, im very patient in dealing with people and emotionally tense situations so me and rook? we gang fr we tight like a booty hole in here 🤭 im a very heavy sleeper so unless rook shakes me by the neck to give me a kiss i would NAWT gaf 🔥🔥🔥
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tornadodyke · 2 years ago
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there is absolutely no age limit on fandom but if an incorrect quotes shipping blog reblogs a post i made about two characters (who i don't ship, though i haven't posted a single thing about the matter on my sideblog at all about it) and less than an hour later you are vagueposting about it with a post that literally starts out with "anti-shippers be like" and you are. thirty years old. i genuinely think you need to reevaluate what you're doing online/with your free time/with your life.
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genderfluid-druid · 2 years ago
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dropping thoughts like laundry into the aromanticism washing machine and watching them spin. taking little notes in a fancy journal titled "greyro??" and crossing them out, but then going back and scribbling an addendum. holding up an extravagant glass beaker full of a cool bubbling potion and peering at it through safety glasses that say "mind the amatonormativity!"
#i think there are two layers of questioning to deal with#the first layer is easier to see and that's the trauma-related layer#the second layer has been going stealth for years and is more intrinsic#the second layer *could* have been a contributing factor toward the first#so anyway the question is. as i work through the trauma and have the support of a therapist to deal with the first layer#does the second layer become an issue. or is there only the first and it's just worked itself deep enough that it now feels intrinsic#the thing is i do get crushes and i do yearn and i can't remember a time when i didn't crave the idea of a relationship#so that should be that right? not aro. at least not intrinsically.#but why did i always end up losing interest in the relationship once i had it#was it really just because i wasn't dating people i actively chose#honestly maybe. there *was* B. i don't know how much longer that might've continued if logistics hadn't put an end to it#and M....... M is a tricky one. because even though i left that relationship by my own choice. i kind of had to in order to not want to die#the thruple vibes with K were just so utterly rancid and M was just so incapable of doing anything to make it better#so yeah. maybe that one could've continued indefinitely IF two to three of the people involved had been#a leeeeetle more mature and well adjusted. maybe. but desire for a relationship was not the issue.#so okay. maybe im NOT aro. maybe i just have shitty taste in men. you know? that's a distinct possibility.#okay. so now on the other hand. let's look at how happy and enlightened I've felt since starting to *use* the aro label#cuz it actually is fantastic. the freedom to just feel love and affection for anyone I'm close to and not have to worry about#it being taken in a way i don't intend. that's great i love that#and not feeling any pressure to find The One? rocks. good shit. i can just let whatever relationships be what they're gonna be#and not have to fret over assigning a label and structures and expectations. hot shit.#(honestly it's helping me understand where M was coming from in a way that would've been. you know. pretty useful six years ago.)#i don't wanna lock myself in a relationship with friend E but it's great hanging out with her on a regular basis#cuz that's the amount of affection i feel for her. enough to chill and watch Owl House. not enough to be in each others' space all the time#(god idk if I'll ever want to be around anyone all the time ever again. that is a LOT for my limited batteries)#idk how physical affection fits into this yet. that area is still under development#but like. if my friends were cool with it and i knew they wouldn't take it too seriously then YES i would probably kiss almost any of them#and i THINK that's true and not me telling myself something i think I'm supposed to believe? i THINK.#'s always the possibility that i just very badly want to be kissed and my brain is looking to make that happen in a way that isn't scary#ah shit that’s 30 tags. i’ve done it again.
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theseimmortalsouls · 22 days ago
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last year, i was surrounded by people who constantly cut me down. it was exhausting. now i have people who excitedly contact me and actively engage in my life and interests
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I feel like it's important to remember not to fall into the "kids these days" mindset. If what you're saying boils down to "kids these days don't know anything" or "kids these days are spoiled" or other classics, that's a good time to remember that people have been saying those things about every single generation for millennia and try to examine those thoughts more critically and approach the kids with more compassion.
ok flaming hot take from ur local transfag here but i think yall take your judgement of young queers like... way too far. yes there are alot of annoying young queers who speak authoritavely on what other queers should/shouldnt call themselves and policing gay behavior and thats bad. thats terrible and no one should do that. but i see it extending to judging young gays and trans kids who just like certain music or shows or aesthetics and the like. and i think that's bad too. i think us adult queers should be kinder to these kids who grew up on the internet for not knowing any community outside of the internet. take it from an adult queer who was raised on the internet and who lives in one of the most conservative states in the us. community in general is being stripped away from young people faster than you can blink, and finding "true and authentic" queer spaces is even harder for young people. partially, i think, is because older queers refuse to relate to the young ones. i dont think we can blame the new generation of queers for being inside their own bubble that they dont know about certain kinks (come on man theyre 14) or certain events or lingo or shit that's happened in the lgbtq community. maybe im taking this all in bad faith, i think im definitely missing alot of context, but i beg adult and older queers to just be kind to the young ones. it's terrifying to be a young trans person right now as much as it's terrifying to be an older one. just be kind.
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pinguuu-ni · 1 year ago
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yeah u remember the fwb situation? 1 month later this really ain't feeling like an fwb at all
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i-am-church-the-cat · 1 year ago
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