#bcs he makes me want to chug cement

[cursed-rat-of-homosexuality]

they... they call him the nightcrawler bcs mah boy is CRAWLIN all night long haha- *coughs up blood*

[sanguineterrain]

Hi I’m back because couples who aren’t together just yet are EVERYTHING

And the new theme?? The icon?? Sanne 😍

May I request “you matter so much to me” with Dick? A little angsty if you’re feeling it?

hey there!!! thank you hehe i felt it was time for a theme change bc fall ❤️ hope you like it! thanks for sending a request 🥰

dick grayson x gn!reader. tw: reader is injured but not much description of the injury, mention of bombing, dick being a protective sweetheart, love confession.

****

You're probably being paranoid.

You probably don't need to call Dick. He'll definitely be busy right now. And you call him way too much as it is.

Wally had asked last month if you two were dating, which had been a humiliating conversation, so you've been vigilant about not clinging to Dick so much. You're just friends. That's all you'll ever be.

These two guys at the train station are really freaking you out, though. What do all the posters say? See something, say something?

You take a deep breath and dial.

"Hello?"

"Hi, Dick," you say tentatively.

"Hey!" Dick says, sounding slightly breathless. "Hey, how are you? I've missed you, what have you been up to?"

The smile in his voice makes you ache. Fuck. You should've just called an Uber.

"Hey. I'm okay. Sorry for not calling, I've been, uh, swamped at work."

"That's okay. It's nice to hear from you."

You melt. "It's nice to hear from you, too."

One of the guys across the station tosses a duffel bag inside of a storage closet and closes the door, then locks it. Right. Back to why you called.

"Dick, I think these two guys at the train station might be up to something. I could be wrong! I-I'm probably wrong, but—"

"What are they doing?" he asks, and you can hear him shifting to Nightwing Mode.

"They threw a duffel bag into a closet, but they don't look like workers. And—"

One of them lifts his coat, and you see a holstered gun. Shit.

"Oh my God," you whisper. "One of them has a gun."

"Get out of there," Dick orders. "I'm on my way. I'll pick you up. Meet me on the corner of Mason and Jewel."

"Okay," you say, heartbeat rabbiting. "Okay, um, Mason and Jewel. Got it."

"It'll be okay," he says, a little gentler this time. "I won't let anything happen to you, alright? Go somewhere where there's a lot of people, and stay on the line."

You take a deep breath. "O-okay. I trust you."

You head for the stairs when the ground rumbles under your feet. People begin to shout and you run faster, trying to make it out of the station.

"What's happening, honey? Talk to me," Dick urges.

You hardly register the honey in your panic.

"The ground's shaking. Dick—"

Something knocks into your back and you crumple to the floor, phone falling from your hand. Everything goes black.

****

You open your eyes to blackness, and for a moment, you're afraid you've lost your sight. But then the shadows become clearer, and you can make out distinct, albeit dimly lit, shapes.

You try to form a word but the air has been sucked out of your lungs and it sounds more like a wheeze.

The surface beneath you is soft and firm. There's a blanket over your shoulders.

You rasp out a sound that's an attempt at 'hello.' Your lips are cracked, and your throat feels like you chugged cement.

A hand rests on your forehead. You try to sit up.

"Easy, easy. Don't try moving just yet."

Dick is in his Nightwing suit, but the mask is off. You blink at him slowly. You'd almost forgotten how blue his eyes are.

"Can you tell me your birthday?" he asks, continuing to stroke your face.

You tell him your birthday. Your throat feels like sandpaper, and a straw is pushed to your lips. You drink the water greedily.

"Wha' happ'd?" you ask.

"There was a small bomb. Half the station collapsed." Dick sucks in a deep breath and seems to steel himself. "You, um, you hit your head pretty hard. I found you and brought you back to the Batcave. I want to monitor you overnight just in case."

Your eyes widen. "Batcave?"

Dick smiles. "The one and only. I'll give you a tour later."

You frown. "Shouldn't you be out there?"

"Oh." Dick rubs his neck. "Well, uh, the others have got it pretty much covered. But I can give you space, if-if you're tired or something. Uh, Alfred's upstairs if you need anyth—"

You shake your head. "Not kicking you out, Dickie. Just don't wanna keep you from important stuff."

Dick leans in, looking at you intently.

"You're important."

You smile and look away, belly swooping at his seriousness.

"Oh. Thank you, Dick."

"I mean it," he says fiercely, then swallows. "You are... you're one of the most important people in my life. You matter so much to me. I should've said so earlier, and I guess today was the kick in the pants I needed."

You turn to him, eyes wide. "What are you saying?"

Dick slips his hand into yours, rubbing your knuckles with his thumb.

"Every day, I see how fragile life is," Dick says. "Witnessed it for myself, too. I can't—I don't want to pretend that I don't care about you as much as I do. That I don't wish we were more. And if you don't feel the same way, then that's okay, but I needed to say something before—"

"Dick," you murmur.

He stops. "Yeah?"

"Kiss me."

He blinks once, twice, then wastes no more time. Dick cups your jaw with both hands. It's almost overwhelming, the way Dick Grayson kisses you like you're the only person in the universe.

His hair is just as soft as you imagined, and you tangle your other hand in it, massaging the base of his neck. Dick makes a quiet whine in the back of his throat, and you hungrily swallow the sound.

"Ahem."

You flinch apart, and Dick covers his mouth. He glances at you through his lashes, and the look promises that he's not finished with you.

All excitement about said promise self-destructs when you see Batman standing ten feet away. Even under the cowl, he looks unimpressed.

"Nightwing," he says. "Taking care of our patient?"

Oh God. You're never setting foot in Gotham again.

"Excellent care," Dick says, apparently used to Batman's cheek.

"Hn. I expect a report of the station incident tomorrow."

"Of course. Do you need me out there?"

"No. It's handled." Batman looks at you. "You are welcome to join us for dinner."

He swooshes away with a truly unnecessary jump into the Batmobile. You wait until he's gone before groaning and putting your face in your hands.

"Oh my God, I just made out with you in front of Batman. I can never face him."

Dick pulls you into his arms, kissing your temple.

"Are you kidding? He basically just welcomed you into the family. I knew he'd like you."

[bonebrokebuddy]

Once again, response by @stealingyourbones but typed by me bc the nerd has to focus on driving us back home.

——

In all honesty. I make so many prompts that everything I’ve made sorta bleeds together and nearly doesn’t make sense anymore.

But I would love to be in a world where ghosts truly existed. And superheroes existed and just live my normal life.

And try desperately not to become a casualty under 300 tons of cement and rebar in the imminent villain attack that would happen.

[tangent starts here]

I want to sit down and Hot Ones style interview a superhero. Imagine the justice league doing a Hot Ones interview.

Batman being completely stoic and not even flinching at any of the sauces.

Clark being literally unable to taste the difference.

The Flash just having his water seemingly evaporate from his glass in front of him as he chugs it faster than the frame rate can even register him moving. They have to use a slo mo camera on The Flash and it still barely picks his movements up.

…Hey, could you repost this maybe so people can react to it separately? (will do, twin:) )

——-

Oh look this dude came up with another prompt ig, here y’all go. More food for the bone stripping pirranas.

Hopefully this answered your question, my dude, even if it got a little off track!

Fuck it. Q&A time. Ask me a question and I shall answer.

[obtusemedia]

The best songs of the 2010s: #75-51

#75: “The Only Thing” by Sufjan Stevens (2015)

It was tough to pick a single song from Sufjan Stevens’ masterpiece, Carrie and Lowell, for this list. The album, about his dead mother, is consistently beautiful and tragic throughout.

But “The Only Thing” has the most devastating line of the whole album, and possibly the whole decade, delivered in a wobbly falsetto: “Should I tear my eyes out now?/Everything I see returns to you somehow.” Case closed. Now please excuse me while I cry for the rest of the day.

#74: “Best Song Ever” by One Direction (2013)

If you can’t appreciate this slice of pop-rock perfection that shamelessly rips off The Who, I’m not sure we can be friends.

“Best Song Ever” still sounds as the pinnacle of One Direction’s career, with its fizzy arena-rock chorus and adorable lyrics about that one special night with a mysterious woman, never to be seen again. The Millennial Whoops are plentiful, and they are irresistible.

Yes, “Best Song Ever” is a corny boy band song. But A) it’s the best possible version of a corny boy band song. And B) boy bands are wonderful. Just embrace the cheese.

(Also, One Direction was the greatest boy band of all time. Don’t fight me on this.)

#73: “Pray For Rain” by Pure Bathing Culture (2015)

Portland shoegaze duo Pure Bathing Culture delivered the closest approximation to a prime Cocteau Twins single since the early ‘90s.

It’s got the icy synths and shoegaze guitars to throw any listener into a hypnotic groove. The secret ingredient that makes “Pray For Rain” stand out, however, is the thumping, snare-heavy beat that invokes both military drum lines and trip-hop. It adds a propulsion to the otherwise dreamy track, creating a dissonant yet incredible experience.

#72: “Not” by Big Thief (2019)

Unlike the hushed folksy whispers of Big Thief’s first 2019 album, “Not” is a furious, noisy firebomb of an indie rock jam. Lead singer Adrianne Lenker’s warble is pushed to its limits, as her vocals crack and strain while the song’s tension (and noise level) slowly ratchets up in the song’s first half. 

Then, the pent-up energy is finally released for an explosive, discordant two-and-a-half minute guitar solo. It’s pure chaos and anger distilled into one instrument, and the greatest moment so far of Big Thief’s promising career.

#71: “Dog Years” by Maggie Rogers (2016)

The strength of Maryland indie-pop prodigy Maggie Rogers’ first few singles is how in tune with nature she sounded. I’ve dubbed it “REI-pop.”

And none of her songs are more reminiscent of a high-end outdoors store than “Dog Years” — and yes, that’s a compliment. “Dog Years” incorporates noises like wind chimes and owl hoots to its soulful synthpop production for a unique flavor. Rogers delivers on the vocal end with a stunning performance reminiscent of blue-eyed soul greats like Daryl Hall.

It’s a bummer that mainstream indie pop nowadays is going to mostly sound like Jeep ads. But “Dog Years” proves great art can still be created in that avenue.

#70: “The House That Heaven Built” by Japandroids (2012)

With “The House That Heaven Built,” Vancouver, BC indie rockers Japandroids made a perfect road trip anthem. The chugging guitars shoot to the sky, the drumming is furious, and the fist-pumping “OH OH OHs” are plentiful.

“House” is like a Bruce Springsteen collaboration with The Replacements: righteous fury backed by raucous, bar-friendly punk-rock. When lead singer/guitarist Brian King informs the listener that if “Anything try to slow you down/Tell em all to go to hell,” it’s something anyone can feel in their bones.

#69: “Adorn” by Miguel (2012)

“Adorn” is dangerously smooth. The chillwave-meets-80s-R&B production gets you halfway there, but Miguel’s buttery vocals are the main attraction here. From his endearing ad-libs (“whoap!”) to his effortless vocal runs on the gorgeous melody, he sounds like a seasoned pro.

I’m going to give y’all a hot take — “Adorn” is the Millennial “Sexual Healing.” It strikes that same nocturnal, sexy flair, and Miguel is working it just as hard as Marvin Gaye did. It’s too bad Miguel never was quite able to make something quite as impressive as “Adorn” again, but that single (and its accompanying, phenomenal Kaleidoscope Dream record) will cement him as a ‘10s R&B icon.

#68: “The World’s Best American Band” by White Reaper (2017)

White Reaper never claimed to be the world’s best band. Nope — they want to be the world’s best American band. So it’s only fitting that Louisville’s finest dirtbags cooked up a warm slice of some of the greasiest, sleaziest and most proudly stupid capital-R RAWK in years.

This is the kind of music Van Halen would’ve made if they were a low-rent Millennial indie band. This is the kind of music Gardner Minshew probably listens to. And it’s glorious.

#67: “I Just Had Sex” by The Lonely Island feat. Akon (2010)

This list isn’t really trying to measure importance or anything like that. It’s basically just the songs that made me the happiest this decade. And there are few songs that make me smile as much as The Lonely Island’s pathetically hilarious “I Just Had Sex.”

There’s so many golden moments here, from “I called my parents right after I was done!” to “The best 30 seconds of my life!” and “I think she might have been a racist?” The comedy trio was really on their A-game.

But what makes “I Just Had Sex” more than just a goof is that it’s also catchy as hell. That Akon chorus is legitimately one of the best pop hooks of the decade. What made The Lonely Island so brilliant in their turn-of-the-decade peak is their ability to make songs that often surpassed the actual pop hits they emulated, while not sacrificing hilarious lyrics.

(Also, shoutout to “Jack Sparrow” and the legitimately impressive baseball-themed “Let’s Bash,” both of which could’ve also snuck onto this list.)

#66: “Oh My Darling Don’t Cry” by Run The Jewels (2014)

Sometimes, you turn to hip-hop for inspiring messages and thoughtful, provocative lyrics (something Run The Jewels has certainly delivered on with tracks like “Early”).

But sometimes you just want an aggro banger that makes you want to smash through a brick wall like the Kool-Aid Man. That’s what “Oh My Darling Don’t Cry” brings to the table, thanks to its heavy helping of fuck-everyone defiance and El-P’s trademark apocalyptic, frantic production.

#65: “Your Best American Girl” by Mitski (2016)

In her signature song, “Your Best American Girl,” Mitski took the thrashing ‘90s guitars and epic chorus of Smashing Pumpkins’ “Today” and turned it into a conversation about race, insecurity and love.

Mitski, who is Japanese-American, vividly describes the angst of trying to fit the lily-white image of the “American Girl” for a boy. The song begins with insecurity — “Your mother wouldn’t approve of how my mother raised me/But I do, I think I do” — and then flips that statement into a proud stand for her roots: “But I do, I finally do.” It’s a powerful declaration, fitting of one of the decade’s most powerful rock anthems.

#64: “A Real Hero” by College and Electric Youth (2010)

Consider this spot a placeholder for all the best songs from the 2010′s best soundtrack: “Drive.”

Out of that soundtrack’s three stand-out singles, “A Real Hero” is the best by a hair. College’s slick, pulsing production is a perfect contrast to Bronwyn Griffin’s whispered, ghostly vocals. It’s the perfect love theme for an aggressively hipster-y movie where Ryan Gosling plays a dude in a gold satin jacket, drives around L.A. silently, and crushes a guy’s head in an elevator.

But shout out to the other two classics on Drive, “Nightcall” and “Under Your Spell,” which are also musts while driving around at night feeling moody.

#63: “Birthday Song” by 2 Chainz feat. Kanye West (2012)

“Birthday Song” is gloriously stupid. It’s the kind of song you laugh at the first time you hear it, but after a few more listens, you’re rapping along with 2 Chainz and Kanye.

And it’s hard not to rap along when there’s this many quotable lines: “SHE GOT A BIG BOOTY SO I CALL HER BIG BOOTY.” “I’M IN THE KITCHEN. YAMS EVERYWHERE!!” “Last birthday, she got you a new sweater/Put it on, give her a kiss, and tell her, ‘DO BETTER.’” And of course, the most iconic line of them all: “All I want for my birthday is a big booty hoe.”

“Birthday Song” is so ridiculous that it’s only a couple jokes removed from a Lonely Island single. And that’s what makes it so fun.

#62: “Every Day’s the Weekend” by Alex Lahey (2017)

Aussie indie rocker Alex Lahey made the best Blink-182 song of the decade with “Every Day’s the Weekend.” It’s got a soaring chorus with the all-important “WHOA OHs,” a chugging guitar riff, and it’s catchy as hell.

Just toss in a lackadaisical attitude and a “I Gotta Feeling”-style days-of-the-week chant and you’ve got a pop-punk classic.

#61: “Take a Walk” by Passion Pit (2012)

While MGMT burned their cultural capital by making zoinked-out psych rock (which was pretty solid!), their peers Passion Pit doubled down on their signature synthpop sound in the early ‘10s. Their 2012 album, Gossamer, is one of the all-time great albums with a happy, bouncy sound but crushingly dark lyrics. So naturally, its first single is a perky pop tune about financial struggles!

“Take a Walk” is so catchy and uplifting musically — just try getting that iconic synth riff out of your head — that Michael Angelakos’ lyrics about the Great Recession seem out of place at first. But it gels anyways. The uplifting music just emphasizes the dire situation Angelakos and his then-wife found themselves in, and it makes the soaring synth riff read as more melancholy than optimistic.

#60: “Gretel” by (Sandy) Alex G (2019)

"Gretel” is like an indie-folk song that went to the Upside Down. All the requisite parts are there — gently strummed guitar, lyrics with a man-of-the-people feel, humbly Middle American vocals — but it feels warped and twisted.

The easiest way to describe it is like if a typical folk-pop song CD was left in the sun for a solid week or so, allowing it to melt. And then you tried listening to it. It would sound positively spooky. Yet through the oddball production and eerie vibe, Alex G’s defiant chorus still shines through. A statement like “Good people gotta fight to exist” somehow sounds more powerful in a bizzaro song like this.

#59: “Downtown” by Macklemore & Ryan Lewis feat. Eric Nally, Grandmaster Kaz, Melle Mel and Kool Moe Dee (2015)

Macklemore might have been the 2010′s most unfairly hated artist. Yes, he’s corny. Yes, Kendrick should’ve won those Grammys instead. But the dude was fun, inventive and a unique voice in hip-hop at the time.

“Downtown” is a prime example of Mack’s talent. Or at least, his knack for assembling a fantastic supporting crew. Old-school rappers Grandmaster Kaz, Melle Mel and Kool Moe Dee deliver some forceful interludes, and Eric Nally and his wildman vocals give “Downtown” a killer, Queen-esque chorus. And of course, producer Ryan Lewis helps sell the song, with a constantly-switching beat that ranges from ‘70s funk to bombastic arena rock. Even Seattle legend Ken Griffey Jr. makes a cameo in the Spokane-filmed video!

In a late-’10s hip-hop scene filled with mopey sad white boys like Post Malone and NF, Macklemore’s goofy vibe and dad jokes are sorely missed.

#58: “Flesh Without Blood” by Grimes (2015)

In a decade filled with wonderful alt-pop weirdos, Grimes might have been the weirdest. One of her standout songs, “Kill v. Maim,” is about Michael Corleone from The Godfather Pt. II, but if he was a time-traveling, gender-switching vampire (yes, really).

“Flesh Without Blood” is comparatively normcore, but it’s still Grimes’ best slice of bonkers pop magic. Written from the perspective of a fan angry that she sold out, the track rides a surf-rock guitar groove into the oblivion. Grimes’ squeaky vocals are almost taunting in tone, but the hooks are so massive and the production is so fresh that I doubt listeners mind.

#57: “Slide” by Calvin Harris feat. Frank Ocean and Migos (2017)

Arguably the biggest name in cheeseball EDM took a shockingly sharp pivot into silky-smooth funk with “Slide.” And it worked! It worked weirdly well!

Of course, it helps that Calvin Harris has always had impeccable taste in guest vocalists, from Florence Welch to Haim. And by snagging once-in-a-generation talent Frank Ocean (and the fun, if not legendary, Migos) for “Slide,” he possibly pulled his greatest coup yet.

...well actually, no. His best song will always be the gloriously trashy and very British “Dance Wiv Me” with grime legend Dizzee Rascal. But the slick tropical grooves of “Slide” are a worthy contender.

#56: “I Belong in Your Arms” by Chairlift (2012)

I could’ve sworn this was in an old John Hughes movie. The wintry synths and retro-chic vibe of “I Belong in Your Arms” certainly would’ve fit snugly into the Pretty In Pink soundtrack, but no — Chairlift’s best single came out this decade.

“I Belong in Your Arms” is stunning in its atmospheric beauty. Singer Caroline Polachek’s vocals are almost Elizabeth Fraser-esque, drifting over the waves of keyboards while still packing a heavy punch on the chorus. And the song’s burst of energy doesn’t feel like a temporary sugar rush — it feels like the real thing.

#55: “Make Me Feel” by Janelle Monaé (2018)

“Make Me Feel” is unabashedly a Prince homage. And if anyone in modern music could successfully replicate the Purple One, it’s Janelle Monaé.

The genre-blurring, impossibly funky “Make Me Feel” immediately grabbed me upon release, with its sharp guitar edges, soft-loud-soft production and sticky hook. But Monaé’s vocal performance is what truly makes the track pop. She clearly had the time of her life here, switching on a dime from smooth and sultry to giddy yelps. If there’s a perfect Janelle Monaé song cooked up in a lab somewhere, it’s probably nearly identical to this.

#54: “Some Nights” by fun. (2012)

Jack Antonoff has always excelled as the second-fiddle. Whether that’s in being the less-famous person in his former relationship with Lena Dunham or being the behind-the-scenes production wizard for megastars like Taylor Swift and Lorde, he works best in the shadows (despite his solo side band, Bleachers, being pretty damn good).

And of course, the project that first brought Antonoff into the mainstream was his band fun., in which he was the lead guitarist and a songwriter. At the time when the band hit their brief apex in 2012, it seemed like frontman Nate Ruess, with his vocal acrobatics and theatrical style, would be most primed for solo fame, but that fizzled.

Eight years later, “Some Nights” stands as a testament that Antonoff (and the other two guys in fun.) can write an incredible arena rock anthem just as easily as a synthpop banger. The song turns a quarter-life crisis into a soaring epic that sounds like a glorious U2-Queen hybrid, with a drumline added on top. Despite cribbing its chorus from Simon and Garfunkel, “Some Nights” still holds its power.

#53: “The Less I Know The Better” by Tame Impala (2015)

There’s one thing that instantly hooks you into Tame Impala’s Instagram-filtered indie pop masterpiece: that bassline. It carries the whole song on its back.

Not to say the rest of “The Less I Know The Better” isn’t good — Kevin Parker’s jealousy-tinged lyrics are fairly relatable, the twinkling synths are nice, the melody is appropriately yearning. But that slap bass ropes all those elements together into a legitimately funky rock tune. If Tame Impala’s mediocre new singles had that bass, maybe they’d be less forgettable.

#52: “Shake It Out” by Florence + The Machine (2011)

Florence Welch might be the decade’s most underrated vocalist. Her voice has the power of a Mack truck, yet she can still convey subtlety when needed.

“Shake It Out” is not one of those subtle moments. It is arena-pop filtered through gospel; a song that sounds like it was meant for a cathedral. Welch describes battling her personal demons like they were literal demons. Couple her wailing with layers upon layers of organs and massive drums imported from the “In The Air Tonight” solo, and you’ve got a song too big to fail.

#51: “Young Blood” by The Naked and Famous (2010)

I really, really wanted to include more tunes from the golden era of radio-friendly indie pop, circa 2008-2012. But a lot of the best stuff — MGMT, Yeah Yeah Yeahs, Phoenix — fell in the previous decade. And others are more nostalgic faves for me than actually great songs (sorry, Grouplove and Matt & Kim).

But The Naked and Famous absolutely still hold up. “Young Blood” still has the insanely high-pitched vocals and twinkly synths of that era, but the New Zealanders throw some distorted ‘90s guitars to create a unique sound. It’s like the Weezer writing a Passion Pit song (but way better than that would imply). Lead singer Alisa Xayalith’s piercing voice is an instrument all of its own, soaring across the synthesizers and guitars like a bolt of neon light.

“Young Blood” might be an early ‘10s time-capsule, but it has hooks for days and a somehow-still-fresh groove.