#bc that song goes so hard lowkey LMFAOO
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THE BEST MOVIE OF ALLL A MASTERPIECE OF ART CALLED
#ren & stimpy#ren and stimpy#the ren and stimpy show#ren hoek#itās intended to be rempy but#itās whatever LOL#inspired by red flags by tom cardy#bc that song goes so hard lowkey LMFAOO#erick doesnāt use green in his art for ONCE????#ricās art
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My boyfriend pt 1
Wow, how do I want to start? I want to really get into it so I can have fresh vivid images and feelings and true thoughts and re-encounter how amazing it really was. Oh my gosh I canāt even fully describe whatās going on. I love this kid, I really do have love for him already. Iām going to do my best. Okay do Iāll come back in pt 2 with actual dates and stuff but Iāll jump right into the beginning. I had recently cut off this crazy ass guy that I met on Tinder and Iām like ok fuck it letās try this again. I was getting so bored I swear tinder was soo ugly I couldnāt even hold conversations with half of those guys. And then I came across Charlie, ugh he was just so adorable. The obvious caught my eye, nice cars, nice eyes, nice hair, nice clothes. And WEED. And he was 21? How could I ask for more? And I had literally fallen for him by the time we matched, I think I waited maybe a day or less before I just shot my shot. I saidĀ āsheeeeshā with a few heart eye emojis and he said something likeĀ āLook at youā, and I just died. Was it too good to be true already? What was the catch? Fake acc??? Dude I donāt even know, but I was quick to gtfo of Tinder and asked for his snapchat, which went well. He sent me a selfie at one point when talking and all was fine, I really wanted to hang out with him because I suck at replying and I didnāt want to lose this chance and fuck it up by having out convo go dead. I had already told so many people about him too it was so crazy I was really getting my hope up for this guy. I mentioned him to my coworker Christiane, my siblings, Dora! And here I am, dating him??? Heās my man, my boyfriend, heās mine. But it was a little challenging at first, I wanted to meet up on the weekend but heās 21 so he was out doing 21 things w his friends of course. He went to ugly ass Darna and the MGM both places I canāt go to smh. Anyways, heās definitely flirting with me as weāre talking, and I just kept mentioning that we should hang out. I asked him to come over and he actually said yes ?? oh bruh, he pulled up and was v cute. He was wearing a black shirt and jeans, I was wearing a long sleeve t shirt and shorts since we were just cooling it at my house I didnāt want to look like I was trying too hard. I was actually so shook like omg, I went and told my mom that I was having a friend over and then yeah ((((: She was iffy of course, and one of the first things he said was that my room wasĀ ācomfyā and itās funny just last night he mentioned that he was relieved that I didnāt smell like basic bitch. Which is basically like VS but Iām on the other boat of basic at Bath and Body works lmaooo, heāll find out later though. Itās funny because I do want to get into nicer perfumes anyways, so itās good timing. Continuing, we were drinking Patron as our first drink omg. Only a few shots and they were half shots because he was driving far back home and he had gone to a bar beforehand. Itās crazy because we totally vibed together and I knew we both felt it, like we were feeling each other but at the same time I we couldāve been cool ass friends. And Iām glad that we have a bff feeling relationship, like thatās my mf boyfriend but that my mf mans too. He literally gives me diarrhea of the mouth, and as someone that can never stop talking itās crazy to think that I could talk anymore than I already do without not being able to breath between words. At the same time my mind gets jumbled up and I lose my train of thought and I donāt know what to say. Some things just jump out and others just take so long to formulate and I second guess it but even when I cross reference stories and get lost Charlie always reminds me what the whole point of the conversation was. Charlie. Charlie. Charlie. Good luck Charlie, Charlie and Lola? Charlie is literally so gorgeous, even though he might be wearing colored contacts lmfaoo. And itās funny bc this other hoe ik wears them so I subtweeted and I wonder if he thinks itās about him. I love him for appreciating my little butt and my little boobs. See how I keep getting distracted, I canāt even tell our story bc heās so great and all his little details excite me a lot. Ok so we hung out and he didnāt even kiss me or try to do much but he did flirt with me I think? I couldnāt even tell if he was being friendly or not.Ā The next time we hung out we drank again, and same thing. It was nice we cooled it but nothing big. As soon as he asked for my number though, I KNEW he was fucking w me. And then I think that it was the 3rd time I copped us coke, and it honestly sucks that my memory is so hazy. Especially with someone that I care about so much and such significant moments, I wish I could remember everything. I wish I could relive it and remember. Thatās why this blog is so important to me, I need to remember the good because it seems that only bad and traumatic moments stick to me and cling to my mind. I remember being on my couch and just leaned over and he kissed me and I just exploded. I wish I could remember what I was wearing, what show was on the TV, what time and day it was. Iāll investigate but thereās only so much information I can gather. I donāt want him to know that my mind is burnt as much as it is, I donāt want Charlie to think that somethingās wrong with me. And looking back at out 1 month of talking and me falling for him, all I do is talk and talk and I probably seem mildly crazy and self centered. This is not my world, and these people arenāt just living in it. I donāt even know much about him, heās gonna come over today and Iām going to just ask him everything and stfu. I wish I wasnāt so me, me, me all the fucking time. Itās probably so noticeable and ugly. My fucking baby. I am SO happy he is mine like wow I want him to feel appreciated. I want him to feel good, and I want him to be so happy to be with me and say Iām his girlfriend too. UGH I just missed a good writing opportunity just now while Kukuwa went to lunch. I have a new motivation and yeah itās to look good for myself but itās also to look good for my boyfriend, I can only wear so much make up and jewelry. My true looks, frizzy hair, fat stomach, and flat ass will always peek out no matter how I dress it up. I need to work on it, I canāt be out with a cute ass guy like him and not look like a bad ass bitch. So far weāve been to the movies together, and the fair. But those are separate stories, and this will literally go on forever and ever. I wanted to write every detail I could possibly remember, and I canāt wait to add things to our scrapbook, itās going to be so lit. Heās motivated me to stay more financially stable so that I can sustain us both, so we can have fun and can continuously have a nice time. I want to go everywhere, I want to go on trips and go see the world and have real adventures with my love. Fall is coming up and weāre going to do the whole sha-bang, I want to go to the pumpkin patch, horror fest at Kings Dominion, I want to dress up as something doesnāt have to match or anything. I want to take corny ass photos, and I REALLY want to carve pumpkins. I want to be able to get naked and let you love me, to embrace me and to kiss me everywhere. I want to be able to feel good and confident in front of my boyfriend. I recently got some new products hopefully they can help with the new scars bumps and the old scars, I feel like itās going to take forever but I hope itāll go quick. I need to start taking my vitamins and just take care of myself in general. Going back to Charlie instead of going on and on about my pointless and selfish insecurities, as soon as we kissed I felt myself melt into my underwear. I Felt myself wanting more and more, wanting to just grab him and love him everywhere. Literally the night that I discovered the songĀ āSleepwalkā by Santo and Johnny was right after we just had our first kiss and the riff at the first 7 seconds of the song just climaxes the same slow and tender way that these feelings hug my insides and gently squeezes my heart with small pools and waves of care and affection. Iām sure thereās a better way to organize those thoughts and feelings but I want it to be true and raw. He is just so pretty, Charlie is soo pretty to me I donāt know what to do. We had an unspoken trust where we gave each other everything. Sometimes I want to rip his face off because hes just so mesmerizing to me. It would super duper suck if he has brown eyes heād look fine of course but the bragging rights that I have a boo w hazel eyes is veryyy high for me. He told me that heād be having a oc for a whole week and that Iām invited of course, weāll see how that goes. Iām not going to lie but the fact that I havenāt met his mom makes me nervous and hurt. What if she doesnāt like me or doesnāt approve of me, and weāre already dating as boyfriend and girlfriend? I really do think that it matters and I almost jokingly met her last night but I didnāt like my outfit enough for a first impression and I honestly do think it matter so much dude. This is the first and last image sheāll see of me until the next time Iād see her and who knows how long thatāll be. Not only that im trying to get hit from the back soooo bad omg I miss back shots so bad but I feel like we canāt catch the same rhythm. It sucks because the one time we did it was the first time we had sex in his little side room in his basement. And DUDE Iām lowkey embarrassed I did this weak ass little roll on his dick. I think our sex is really good, but it could be better. I havenāt cheated on him and I can feel that my pussy is tight and I can tell that he feels it too.Ā Ā Ā
8/28/2019
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