#bc its my return to being myself. i need to shout it from the rooftops

[werewolfoffeverswamp]

REMEMBER WHO YOU ARE!

[emsvegetables]

“Okay, here it goes. Fem!SO HCs who's Suga, Noya, Akaashi, Bokuto and Kenma's gf getting mocked by her own family that she's worthless, useless and ugly (since she's short and chubby) and that no one will love her. She distances herself from the boys. How the boys find out and approach + comfort/reassure her will be up to you. I've been struggling with this for years (except the fact that it's an internal struggle with myself, my family doesn't hurt me like that) and it really sucks. - 🐳 anon”

oh shit, anon, i’m so, so sorry that you’re going through something like this. I cant say that i’m dealing with an exact situation like yours but i’ve gone through something like that before!!!! It’s never nice to go through this alone, and just remember my PMs are always open if you need a chat!!!!!

also, i’m so sorry, but i don’t want to portray the incident wrongly, so i’ll leave the words your family says to you very vague.

Sugawara:

* He’s a really dutiful boyfriend, so he pays a lot of attention to you.

* He doesn’t find out quickly, but it’s something he slowly picks up upon after dating you.

* Sometimes, when he comes over, it’s really obvious that you try your best to not bump into your family members when he’s there, and even if you do bump into them, you mutter out a quick apology and hurry back to the room with him.

* He’s barely exchanged seven sentences with your parents ever since he started to date you, so of course he’s a little curious about that.

* But one day he’s calling you, and you tell him that you need to go abruptly when door to your room opens.

* You press the wrong button and stop video sharing instead of ending the call, and shock sets into Sugawara when he hears the words that your father spews at you.

* He knows that you don’t want him to listen to this, but he can’t help but continue to hear the words your father throws at you.

* Unknowingly, a tear slides down his cheek.

* You of course find out that Sugawara heard the entire thing when you look back at your phone after your father left your room to see that the call was still ongoing.

* The next day, when you see each other in school, it’s obvious that you’re avoiding him, what with you texting him that you won’t meet up with him to walk to school together, and coming into class just a few seconds before the teacher walks in, so he has no chance to talk to you.

* The moment a break comes, you’re running out of the classroom and by the time he hears out, you’re nowhere to be seen.

* Then lunch time comes, and before you speed off, Suga’s grabbing your wrists softly and telling you that the both of you need to talk.

* He brings you to the gym, who has no one during the lunch time, and asks you quietly if what he overheard yesterday was a regular occurrence.

* When you nod timidly, he’s feeling this ache in his heart, because why were you being treated that way??????????

* He’s hugging you and telling you that you aren’t worthless, nor are you ugly, and that you’re perfect to him.

* He’s also telling you that you can come over to his house any time you like, and to call him whenever something like that happens again, because he’ll find a way to get you out of it.

* He loves you so much, and he thinks you’re absolutely beautiful!!!!!!!!!!!! Nobody can tell you otherwise and he won’t let them.

Nishinoya:

* Tbh Nishinoya is VERY attentive to his surroundings, bc that’s what a libero is supposed to be!!!!

* So he finds it very, very weird whenever he goes over to your house, and finds out that you’re super quiet in front of your family.

* He’s like: something doesn’t add up here. ):(

* He doesn’t find out until one day, he leaves his phone in your house and he only realised it a few minutes after he left, so he’s running back to your house.

* But then before he knocks on the door, he’s suddenly hearing words that nobody should even hear, and he hears your name, and he realises its being directed to you.

* HES GOING ROLLING THUNDER AND rolling to your garden, and peering through the kitchen window.

* When he sees that he isn’t hearing wrongly, or imagining things, he rolling back to the front door and knocking heavily on the door.

* The shouts immediately cease, and your father opens the door with a smile on his face, and Nishinoya has never wanted to punch a face so badly before.

* You can tell from the way he’s forcing out a smile that he’s heard everything, and you quickly pass him the phone and get him to leave.

* When he tries to corner you the next day at school, it’s plain obvious to anyone, especially him, that you’re avoiding him.

* You’re turning the other way when you see him at the end of the corridor, you’re ignoring him in class, and he’s feeling so sad.

* So he’s instantly running after you the moment school ends, and he’s dragging you to the rooftop to talk to you.

* He’s straightforward, and asks you right away whether whatever he heard your dad say to you happened all the time.

* When you flinch, and nod, he’s instantly clenching his fist, and he’s punching the wall, because why the HELL was anyone treating you that way?????

* He’s telling you that the next time it happens, you should call him because he’s coming over to get you out of that family, and he’s telling you that whatever your family said to you isn’t true, and that you’re bloody gorgeous and if anyone tells you otherwise he’s breaking their face with his fists.

* He makes good on that promise when he comes to visit you in your house a few days later, and accidentally tripping forward and punching your dad in the gut.

Akaashi:

* He’s very, very perceptive, so any moment where something’s wrong his (Y/N) radar is going off and he needs to know if you’re okay.

* He notices how quiet you become whenever you’re around your family, and how you mutter out soft apologies to every thing you do, almost as if it’s been ingrained in your mind.

* He doesn’t find out until one day, he goes to the bathroom while you continue chilling in your room, and suddenly he’s hearing the most degrading words being said, and they’re being directed at you.

* It dawns on him that your father thinks that he left, and it pisses him off to hear how your dad thinks of you.

* For goodness’ sake, he’s your family.

* Family isn’t supposed to act like that.

* He knows he isn’t supposed to be hearing any of those words, but he doesn’t care because all he’s thinking about at that moment is how he was going to cut in.

* So he opens the toilet door as loudly as he cans, and tries to keep his steps soft, and he knocks on the door with a loud cough.

* The voices instantly cease, and when your father comes face to face with Akaashi, you swear, if looks could kill, your father would have dropped dead.

* Akaashi’s staying silent, but he’s grabbing onto your arms and pulling you out of the door.

* “I’m sorry, sir,” his voice is cold,” i would like to take (Y/N) for a walk.”

* When you guys reach a safe distance away from your house, he’s instantly checking to see if you’re okay, and he’s softly asking if that’s happened before.

* When he sees your head nod slightly, he feels this pain in his heart, because why would anyone treat you this way? What the hell was wrong with your family????

* He’s telling you that whenever you feel like you need to leave, you can always come over to his house, and he’ll have a spare bedroom ready for you should you ever want to stay over, and asks you to promise to call him whenever something like that happens again, because he’s running over as fast as he can to remove you from that toxic environment.

* He’s also pressing kisses to your forehead, and telling you that you’re beautiful, and absolutely gorgeous to him, and that you aren’t worthless, and that he loves you so much.

Bokuto:

* Okay, Bokuto’s not the most observant, but what he lacks in intelligence he makes up with emotions!!!!

* He can tell when you’re upset, and for some mysterious reason (that he’s trying his best to find out), you’re upset most of the time.

* It doesn’t really click to him until he’s chilling with you one day in your room and your father returns from work, yelling at you to come out.

* He obviously doesn’t know that Bokuto’s here, because your father has never ever raised his voice in front of Bokuto.

* When you tell Bokuto to stay in the room, he watches you head out, and realises how you sink just a little bit, and suddenly he’s hearing a endless amount of insults streaming at you.

* Bokuto doesn’t get angry easily.

* Sure, he has mini tantrums, but it’s all him feeling sad at himself, he’s never angry.

* But when he hears the words getting thrown at you, he’s storming out of your room, and trust me, an angry Bokuto is someone no one wants to mess with.

* He’s glaring at your dad, but he knows that he has to be respectful.

* “Sir, i’d appreciate if you don’t speak to (Y/N) that way.”

* Your father obviously stops immediately, because he didn’t know Bokuto was here, and he keeps silent for a while, and walks into his own room, slamming the door.

* Bokuto’s instantly carrying you out of the house, bringing you to the nearby playground and placing you on the swing.

* “Does he speak to you like that all the time??????”

* He’s so confused because how can someone treat you that way? How can someone treat ANYONE that way??

* He’d be so angry, too, when you nod your head, because why were you getting hurt like that?????

* He’s instantly peppering kisses everywhere onto your face, and he’s telling you that you’re really pretty to him and that you aren’t worthless to him, and that you’re worth more than a bazillion good spikes to him, and that you mean the world to him.

* He loves you so much, and if he hears your dad treat you like that again, he’s going for the kneecaps, no warnings given.

Kenma:

* Kenma’s very analytical and very observant, so he obviously picks up on something being wrong after he spends some time with you.

* One thing he quickly picks up on is that you’re really reserved whenever he comes to visit you.

* Then he finds out why.

* He’s playing video games on your bed while you do your homework, and that’s when he hears the front door unlock.

* He hears your father call your name in an angry tone, and he instantly stiffens.

* “It’s okay, Kenma,” you shoot a wan smile at him,” i’ll go check what’s wrong.”

* It doesn’t escape his notice that you’re visibly dragging your feet downstairs.

* Then he’s hearing the way your dad speaks to you, harsh, biting words that should never, ever be spoken to anyone.

* He’s really shocked, because your dad has never appeared to him as anything as a doting father, so hearing those words make him so shocked, and at the same time, an ache appears in his chest.

* Then he hears you tell your dad that he’s here, and the house becomes silent again.

* You come back to the room after a while, and he knows better than to prod you, but he really, really wants to know if that happened regularly.

* “Are you okay?” he’s putting down his switch and asking you quietly.

* When you nod your head, he knows your lying, but he continues on.

* “Does this happen all the time?”

* He needs to know.

* When you nod your head slightly, he feels his heart break, because what did you do to deserve being treated like that?????

* He’s pulling you into a hug, and he’s telling you that you’re beautiful and amazing, and that you’re not worthless.

* And from then onwards, he’s trying his best to always get you out of the house, and if he hears your dad speak to you like that again, he’s going to make sure there’s hell to pay.

[corkcitylibraries]

Book Review: Andy Lee and Niall Kelly’s Fighter

by Dr. Sorcha Fogarty

Boxing has been around since at least 688 BC, when the ancient Greeks made it into an Olympic game, but its modern history has often been controversial. To quote Joe Frazier, the first boxer to beat Muhammad Ali, “Boxing is the only sport you can get your brain shook, your money took and your name in the undertaker book.” Many deem the sport barbaric, but it is not for this blog post to decry or defend boxing, especially having read the extraordinary story of Andy Lee.

Far from an expert on Boxing, I came across this book completely by accident, and I’m glad I did. The book was shortlisted for the An Post Irish Book Awards Bord Gáis Energy Sports Book of the Year Award upon its publication in 2018, and it also made the long list for the William Hill sports book prize. The idiom “Don’t judge a book by its cover” doesn’t apply here. Almost everything you need to know about Fighter, and about Andy Lee, can be discerned from the cover of this book. Lee is, by all accounts, victorious, as the photo clearly shows. However, there is no triumphant swagger, no showy display of supremacy. Moreover, looking closely at the cover, we see that the face of the opponent has been obscured, as Lee himself states,

 “I went out of my way to have the face changed because I didn’t want him to have to see it,” he says. “He doesn’t deserve that, it wouldn’t be right. It could easily be me lying on the floor. And this could be him writing a book about the career he went on to have. And if somebody did that to me, if someone put me on the cover like that, I’d be going mad.”

So the idea is that it’s a boxer, just a fighter who took a punch. It’s not him. That’s not that point of it. We went over the cover a lot of times. It’s a great photograph and it tells the story.

Regarding Lee’s personality, nothing could be more revealing: “If you look at me walking away, I’m not celebrating wildly or anything. I’ve been in a battle and that one punch could have finished me for the night just as it finished him. I’m just as hurt as he is – the difference is that he is on the ground.” You would be hard-pressed to find a negative description of Andy Lee. From the press to the public, he has consistently been described as a gentleman, a true role model, with the Irish sports website Pundit Arena summing him up best, 'Lee was a good fighter but he’s an even better human being.' In a business where showmen and blowhards prevail, Lee, as one critic has noted, was always the most decent guy in the room. In his case, he disproves Nietzsche who said, “He who fights too long against dragons becomes a dragon himself.”

A former Irish Olympian boxer, former world champion, freshly retired in early 2018 with a record of 35 wins from 39 pro fights, Andy Lee’s Fighter is the quintessential story of a young boy on the margins of society who made it to the top. Lee competed from 2006 to 2017, held the WBO middleweight title from 2014 to 2015, and in doing so became the first member of the travelling community to win a major world title. Lee was born in London to Irish Traveller parents in 1984 who returned to Limerick in 1998. The book shows how he had to deal with bullying when he was in school, where the other kids would sing at him, “We all live in a yellow caravan, a yellow caravan, a yellow caravan...” He left school at 13, even though he was bright enough to get into the top class when he started secondary school. His determination to stay true to himself, despite the suffocating “rules” of the Travelling Community which, among them, forbids relationships between people from the settled and travelling communities, saw him bring a settled girl home to meet his father, who had forbidden Lee to do so. Lee, however, was a formidable judge of character, and knew that his father and the settled girl, now his wife, the musician, writer and actor Maud Lee, would hit it off, and he was right.  Fighter is not just an account of a boxer’s career. It is also a love story. Lee spends much time on his relationship with Maud in the book, and it is obvious that the two share an incredibly close bond. He recalls the early days of meeting Maud,

“I know we’re from different worlds, that this isn’t how it works. I know that bright, brilliant, educated young women from South County Dublin who have the world at their feet don’t end up with a gypsy boxer from Limerick via London who left school at 13. She must know it too, but she doesn’t care. I tell her everything honestly, about my life, my heritage, my family, anything that she would want to know.”

As regards his Gypsy heritage, Lee neither defines himself by it, nor does he eschew it. As he says, “It’s not something I’ve ever really shouted about but it’s not something I ever shied away from either. I am who I am – I don’t have to be singing from the rooftops. I’m not a campaigner in any sense. I could be. But I only represent myself. Maybe I could have some impact.” Generally, Traveller kids leave education after primary school in order to learn ‘traditional skills’ at home. For boys, this means trades such as bricklaying or tree-cutting, as well as learning to do odd jobs. Meanwhile, the girls must learn how to clean to impeccable standards, as well as how to cook and to care for younger siblings. Once the eldest daughter has left school, Traveller mums take a step back and leave her in charge. Lee’s journey shows that an alternate route is possible, and this is something he did hope his book might be able to achieve, as he states in an interview,

 “And maybe it’ll be some way for a young Traveller or Gypsy to change how they think as well if they read it. Maybe they will get a sense that they have more options than they think they do in life. Because it is a very restricted life. I say it in the book – you are brought up in a world where you have two choices, you have a world of crime or a world of work from a young age. That’s basically it when you’re a kid in that world. You don’t know much beyond it.”

 Although things are changing, with more children in the Travelling community staying in school, and going on to earn degrees at University, the customs and traditions of the Travelling community are difficult to overcome, and many stay within the rigid confines of these customs.

For Lee, boxing was the route to a different life, and his family stayed firmly by his side throughout. The book describes his first workout in the Kronk Gym in Detroit, when he steps into the ring to the call of “fresh meat, fresh meat” and, respect earned, steps out to the comment that “This white boy can box”. Under the tutelage of Emanuel Steward, who trained 41 world champions throughout his career, in 2014, following 18 straight unanswered punches, Lee defeated Korobov to claim the world title, the first time since 1934 that an Irish fighter earned such a victor on US soil. The book chronicles the relationship between Lee and Steward, the years that Lee lived in the Steward family house, how the two drifted apart and then, finally, the poignant deathbed reconciliation as Steward passed away in 2012. The book gives captivating insights into the relationship between the two men. Lee learned a great deal from Steward; as Lee recounts, it seems that Steward’s mastery was in the little details. He instructed Lee how to put sellotape on his laces and protective cup so they didn’t come loose or fall down during a fight. Instead of putting Vaseline on his face, Steward told Lee to apply cocoa butter, “Everyone laughs at me when they hear that,” says Lee, “but I don’t get cut anymore.”

The book contains a host of fascinating anecdotes, glimpses into Lee’s private world, as he describes the Christmas Eve in Dublin after just signing his pro contract, with himself and Maud on George’s Street where they “stop at the ATM as the crowds rush on around us. I enter my pin code and the two of us stand, staring at the balance on the screen.” Also, when preparing for that redemptive night in Las Vegas in the ring with Korobov, Lee tells us how he constantly wrote in his notebook – law of attraction style - “I will become world champion.” His descriptions of his time in the ring are also captivating. As Lee acknowledges himself, in boxing, defeats are often much more interesting than victories. Unsurprisingly, the story of his first two defeats and the shattering impact they have on his career progression are fascinating. He showcases his resilience as he twice rebuilt his career, losing his 15th��pro-fight and then the title fight against Julio Cesar Chavez Junior in El Paso. It is his win over John Jackson that forced me onto YouTube, amazed at how Lee, seemingly on course for defeat, at the mercy of Jackson, up against the ropes, comes back to deliver one of the greatest knockouts in boxing history.

Lee’s story is a compelling insight into the thoughts of a boxer who made it to the top without the need to exude brash arrogance. On 20 February 2018, Lee confirmed his retirement from boxing on Irish radio station Newstalk, on the Off The Ball sports programme, citing responsibilities as a father for why he had chosen to retire, “I got out having achieved what I wanted and having secured my future to a certain extent – not that I’m set for life or anything but I can go out for a Chinese on a Saturday and not worry about it.”

Ultimately, Fighter is intense, emotional and funny, and Lee’s humility and honesty make the book an engrossing and inspirational read. The universally acknowledged “lovely guy” most definitely refutes the common aphorism, based on a quote from 1946 by another famous sportsman, American baseball player, manager and coach Leo Durocher, “Nice guys finish last”.

 Available now on Borrowbox

Sources

https://www.irishtimes.com/culture/books/roles-with-the-punches-andy-lee-uncovered-1.3680689

https://www.paveepoint.ie/traveller-culture-and-identity/

https://www.irishexaminer.com/sport/arid-20320916.html