#bc everyone around is mentally ill too but they somehow manage school adn work and relationships and hobbies | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

szczylpierdolony · 2 years ago

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wish i had the type of depression where you party and do drugs and look sad in cinematic settings rather than the one where i never leave the house barely shower and lose any remnants of a personality ive left

#also thinking abt that post about how you live your life the way you spend your time #and all i do is be in bed and think abt how much i hate myself #and ig i just wish i were anyone else huh #either someone who smart or interesting or at least desirable #and instead im just really anoying and pathetic and not in a way thatd make ppl think im cool if i were a character #just weird and sad and too depressed to do anything #but at the same time it just feels like an excuse #bc everyone around is mentally ill too but they somehow manage school adn work and relationships and hobbies #and all i do is cry and have my best friend tell me she doesnt have the time to see me #which ik is true but at some point it just feels pathetic to ask again knowing she'll say shes busy #so its being surrounded by ppl who constantly talk abt mental illness and trauma and still feeling like the odd one out like ig i dont have #a good reason to be like this #im just lazy and i dont have much to offer #and im off of any social media except this and ig youtube but i just watch sims and jacob geller there #so i minimized ppl to compare myself to #but it still hurts that im at this age when i should be going out and partying and dating and being incapable of it #sorry if youre reading this btw

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