#bc baby questions are less 'incriminating' or whatever

[orcelito]

The suckass thing about writing a fic with pregnancy in it is that I keep going to incognito browser anytime I have a research question bc I dont want fucking Google or whatever to see me googling shit like "pregnancy tests" or "early pregnancy signs" and assume I must be pregnant

The amount of constant surveillance around us to the point where I can't research things for my fic in peace..... it's so aggravating

[disgrays-on]

ever thine, ever mine

Word Count: 3.3k

Pairing: Jason Todd // Reader

A/N: After I finished writing a huge part of this royal AU and cut out a huge chunk of it out during editing, I realised nothing really happened in this fic, nothing was truly resolved, nothing makes sense and everything is rushed but this will have to do bc I’ve come so far to just scrap this whole thing. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 

The thing is you've always sort of known that there was something...not right about all of this, something that just didn't sit too well with you. Jason had been more than charming when you had first met him. He was attractive and he knew it, flaunted it around with a knowing gaze and a boyish grin. He was passionate - you couldn’t get him to shut up once he started talking about something that he was really into - and it made him all the more endearing, really.

It only took you about ten minutes into a conversation with him to realise that there was more to him than what met the eyes. For one, his confident facade and cocky attitude were flimsy, at best, under critical scrutiny. If you hadn’t been closely observing him that first time, you would have missed the shifting eyes and the constant calculating gaze that made you think that he was far less extroverted than he wanted people to think.

There was just something about him, something you couldn’t quite put your finger on even after knowing him for as long as you have. Him being a crazy axe murderer was out of the question or at least, you hoped so. (You had brought it up once and he had laughed so hard until he was red in the face, grinning up at you once he was finished and fondly patting you on the back.)

He had his bad days, definitely not the most mentally sound, but you didn’t think you could name anyone who was in this day and age. Add that to the fact that you had seen the formal garb and the medals that he had hastily shoved into a crumbling box when you burst into his room one day, unannounced. He pushed it carelessly to the very back of his wardrobe, remaining silent as he did, but you didn’t need to be a detective to figure out he had been some sort of soldier. That had been enough of an explanation for his fidgety self and the odd habits that he seemed to unconsciously have.

He was mysterious, if not secretive. Navigating through his past was like navigating through a minefield. It was difficult to know what would get him to open up, get that shy little happiness to creep up around his eyes or what would get him to shut down faster than you could blink, get him drawing back further into the hollow shell that he had been in once. He’d get wistful looks sometimes when he thought you weren’t looking and it was always over the most random things. You didn’t want to push the issue because you understood the need for space, because you needed it too sometimes.

He was incredibly brilliant too, maybe not in the most conventional of ways but so clever in the way that always made you stop and think. He had a thorough knowledge of the inner workings of politics but always seemed to curl his nose up whenever you brought up anything of that sort. He didn’t own a television, didn’t like the news too much either. His curtains were always pulled shut until one day when he would feel suffocated enough, at which point they would be drawn back and the windows would be thrown wide open.

You didn’t know what he did but he had money and quite a bit of it too. You were quite content not knowing, really. As long as it wasn’t hurting anyone and not hurting you, it was fine that he was so distant about his past. You had things you didn’t want to talk about too. You didn’t think anything he could hide would be too devastating anyways.

That particular morning had started out as it normally would have, nothing terribly remarkable at all. You had work so you had slipped out of bed pretty early on, had a quick breakfast and had gotten ready as you normally would have, not forgetting to drop a small kiss on a bleary Jason’s forehead before leaving.

The small yet still monstrous army of tiny children that you had for students was already dutifully waiting for you when school time began and everything proceeded as it should have. At least, it seemed so. It wasn’t until you had to dismiss the kids that everything seemed to move downhill at an alarmingly rapid pace.

“Is it true?” One of your students had asked, her eyes wide and shiny, “Are you really friends with a Prince?”

The question had confused you more than anything else, truly. She had whispered her question with the awe and wonder of a completely lovestruck child that you had simply assumed that she must have been confusing reality with the tales you’ve been regaling to the kids for the past few days.

“What do you mean?” You had asked then, foolishly unaware of what toils and troubles lied ahead of you.

“Well, are you?” She asked again, eyebrows furrowing and soft cheeks puffing up, “Mommy said you were!”

You definitely weren’t, that much you were sure of. It didn’t even seem like a possibility to you. The only royal family you knew of was the one from Gotham and they were thousands of miles away from where you were. They’ve just never been relevant to your life enough for you to have cared about them so you weren’t sure where she could have gotten that from.

You laughed nervously because denying young children anything would only unleash the seemingly never-ending barrage of questions that they had ready specifically for moments like this one. You shook your head, “No, definitely not, sweetheart.”

“Well, my mommy said so.” She huffed, crossing her arms, “She said she saw you on TV with a Prince on that show that she always watches, the one with all the people saying the mean words!” The bell had conveniently rung at that point, saving you from having to answer her, but it had also just thrown you into a different form of hell. Out of the frying pan into the fire. Except it wasn't just a small tiny baby fire, no, it was a huge wild uncontrollable forest fire. As if set off by the school bell, shit had promptly decided it was the right time to go down then. You didn't know if you were to feel thankful or disgruntled over the fact that everything had only begun to fall apart after the working day was over. You had been seeing some of your students off when you were stopped in your tracks by a frazzled coworker, panting and sweating as she ran up to you. “It’s crazy out there!” She had said, looking severely dishevelled and alarmed as she led you to a window overlooking the front yard of the school, “Apparently they’re all here looking for you!” The sight that you were greeted with was enough to send your heartbeat into overdrive, pounding hard against your ribcage. Your mouth had dried up, all words and thoughts suddenly lost to the abyss that was your confusion and fright. You had no idea what was happening and why it was happening but this didn't seem good. The entire front area of your workplace was covered with hundreds of people. Sprawled across the yard were the paparazzi and journalists and news reporters and people with their cameras and recording equipment.

The sheer number of people present was terrifying, and not to mention, dangerous. And they were here for you? It made no sense. You didn't think you had done anything incriminating lately but you could always be wrong. Maybe all those years that you’d spent illegally downloading music was catching up to you. But that didn't explain the amount of press outside, waiting for you.

A quick check of your phone that you had silenced for work revealed that almost everyone you knew had been trying to contact you for the last few hours. That definitely wasn’t good. A big portion of the missed phone calls and unanswered text messages you received had been from Jason. A burst of yearning coursed through you. Jason. If he were here, you would have long ago submitted yourself to the comfort and warmth and safety of his arms. He would make this all go away somehow, he’d take care of all this and make it all better. How badly you wished he was here. He’d sent quite a few but the one that stood out to you the most was the first one he sent.

I don't know how they found out. I’m so sorry.

You didn’t think it was possible but your heart screeched to a halt at that. Found out what? Could he have been anymore cryptic? Whatever it was, he seemed to be convinced that all of this was his fault. The sudden urge to open the news app was unbearable so you booted it up, scrolling through. It didn’t take long for you to find exactly what you were looking for. Any more surprises today and you were sure your heart would stop for real.

ROYAL RUMOUR: LOST GOTHAM PRINCE FOUND IN A SECRET LOVE AFFAIR?

LOVE STORY FOR THE AGES! PRINCE JASON OF GOTHAM AND COMMONER!

ROYAL HOUSE ISSUES FORMAL STATEMENT

Suddenly, crazy axe murderer didn’t sound so bad. You scrolled through a couple more, feeling more and more dazed after each one. There were so many pictures of you and Jason - all from the same night, it seemed - and there was no room to deny it either. It was so clearly you and so clearly Jason, holding hands and eating dinner and laughing together and kissing.

You remembered that night clearly, Jason had dragged you to one of his favourite fast food restaurants for some ‘real good food’ and the two of you had a blast. The amount of information that the press had already managed to gather on you was terrifying. Even with the short amount of time, they had found out who you were, where you worked, where you lived, even the cafe that you often frequented.

When your instincts had told you that something wasn’t entirely right, you had expected some kind of family issue. Maybe Jason’s parents were both dead or maybe his family was unaccepting and they didn't like him very much. Maybe he never had a family to begin with or maybe he was running away from something, someone. But this was absolutely not it. You couldn't have predicted this outcome.

Jason, your Jason, was a Prince. Second-in-line to the throne after his older brother, the same Jason who rarely ever appeared in public when he was younger but when he was, he was always so bright. The Jason who was reported to have literally disappeared off of the face of the Earth after he was kidnapped and tortured during his deployment.

His sudden reappearance would definitely explain all this attention and you just happened to have been caught in all of it. How could you have missed it? No wonder he had seemed so familiar to you. You mentally berated yourself for being careless enough to not have recognised him. But the royal family had always been a private bunch of people, understandably so, and you simply didn’t care enough about them to have updated yourself with everything they did over the years.

You knew the Gotham royal family were made of mostly the King’s wards, that was until a few years back when a blood son was introduced to the court. Everyone had talked about it for a couple of months, matters regarding claim over the throne being one of the more controversial topics, but everything settled down as rumours often do. You saw articles or heard news of them in passing but you’ve never really ever truly looked into them.

And despite the fact that this couldn’t have possibly changed a thing for you - because you adored the Jason that you had fallen for, the one who often made you delicious meals, who grumbled over bad movie adaptations of books, who had sulked for about a day because he couldn’t keep a dog in his apartment - it didn’t change the fact that Jason had lied to you for so long. That realisation had hurt more than anything else but it also pissed you off a bit. Why didn’t he just tell you? You wouldn’t have been too upset but at least, this wouldn’t have happened.

I’ll explain everything when you get back. Alfred will pick you up. Stay safe.

His latest message had been sent a few hours ago and then not another word from him. You’d always prided yourself as quite the eloquent person, even in your text messages, but it was seemingly unavoidable for your response to have only been a string of question marks. Left unread, of course. If it was this bad for you, it was probably even worse for him. You had so many questions that no one seemed to have the answers to and you were feeling so many emotions that you weren’t exactly sure which one you should be feeling. Anger seemed to be winning over though so maybe anger. 

Getting home was an extremely trying process in itself. Going outside had resulted in a lot of chaos, yelling and shoving and flashes of pictures, and that didn’t get you anywhere. This was something that you expected to only happen in the movies or to other people who were definitely more important and more influential. Certainly not to you. You didn’t think you did anything important enough to garner this much attention.

But you needed to get home, to get to Jason. You needed to hear him out, needed an explanation as to why he thought hiding this from you was such a brilliant idea. Your being foolishly naive and blind to it probably helped him out though. You still couldn’t get over the fact that you didn’t make the connection.

Alfred, the person that Jason said would pick you up, was an old gentleman who appeared to be way too unperturbed for this to have been the first time. He offered his services, along with a handful of burly guards in pristine suits, to escort you to Jason’s apartment. The journey was thankfully less hectic than the situation had been at your workplace, at least. Alfred’s sarcastic remarks was a very welcome distraction to your situation, you found your nerves settling slightly. For a while, you had room to breathe and to process everything that happened.

When you arrived, Jason had welcomed you with a tight embrace, muttering a quick apology against your temple before pulling away. He looked worse for wear, exhaustion rolling off of him in waves even though he was fine this morning. All your anger dissipated at once. You could wait to reprimand him, he was already bad enough as it was. You reached up to cup his face, brushing your thumb against his cheekbone. A small smile flittered at the corners of his lips. This was the side he only wore around you, the side that rarely ever came out save for when the both of you were alone in the safety and comfort of a bedroom.

He only had a moment to spare before a knock on the door sounded through the apartment. A young man, Jason’s older brother - annoyingly enough, your brain is quick to recognise this royal this time - stood at the door, a soft smile breaking on his face as soon as his eyes land on Jason.

Jason frowned, dismayed, “What are you doing here?”

Richard, who you had to admit was beautiful, had promptly pulled Jason into a big hug. Jason had sighed in return but let himself be hugged, though their sweet greeting is cut short by Alfred’s stern corralling. Though their meeting had been pleasant, the moments afterwards felt far from that. It didn’t take long for Richard to speak his mind out, anger and distress in his every word.

“Why didn’t you come home, Jay?” He asked after a few minutes of ranting, voice finally quieting down. He looked shaken, heartbroken as he turned to his younger brother.

It seemed as good a time as any to give them privacy so you joined Alfred who was bustling around in Jason’s kitchen. From the kitchen, you could hear the yelling and the rough grunts but it stopped as quickly as it started. Jason came out a bit shaky and red around the eyes but it seemed like a huge weight had been lifted off of his shoulders. The easygoing atmosphere returned easily after that, the silence of the apartment easily replaced by their light banter as if they hadn’t just seen each other for the first time in a long time a few minutes ago.

“I came as soon as I could.” Richard admitted sheepishly, letting out a sigh of relief as he sunk into one of the sofas in Jason’s sitting room, “B didn’t want us all overwhelming you but we couldn’t just stay away.”

“We?” Jason parroted, a frown on his face, more resigned than anything.  

He shrugged, not in the slightest bit apologetic as he replied, “We missed you, Jason.”

Jason didn’t seem all too pleased at the sound of more people coming but Richard had said that there was no stopping them, not when they’d finally found Jason and were determined to bring him back home. Their father, on the other hand, would be joining them the next, not at all because he wanted to but because he had to do things properly, more officially. After all, it wasn’t always that a prince thought missing showed up in a whole different city altogether, so far away from home.

Something told you he was more than thrilled that his family were coming around though. He didn’t need to say it, his despondency before all of this occurred told you much about how much he actually missed his family. Seeing him with his siblings was like seeing a new side of him - he was more relaxed, more content even if he didn’t see it for himself. Seeing him settling into the family dynamic without much effort made your heart flutter in your chest.

“It was nice meeting you,” His older brother had said before he left, smiling at you so earnestly b “Thanks for taking care of Jay for us.”

And that had been enough to jar you. Everything made sense but at the same time, nothing made sense like everything were pieces of puzzles but none of them fit together perfectly. Jason had taken the time to explain it all to you and you’d pieced enough through the conversation happening around you but it was still overwhelming and sitting around, listening to Jason and his family didn’t help at all. You’d been stewing in your anxiety, thinking of what this could possibly mean for you and for him and for everything. He was a real prince, an actual member of the royal family. What the hell.

“Why didn’t you just tell me?” You asked as soon as the door closed behind his family, the anger sneaking up on you and growing by the minute.

“I was going to.” He grumbled.

“But you didn’t!”

And maybe you had yelled a lot of things then that you didn’t mean now and things you regretted but honestly, you deserved it just a bit after all that you’d been through today. You didn’t have any doubts that you’d soon make up with him but for now, you were still ticked off and feeling a little petty. You wondered how much you could sell all the hoodies you've stolen from him for. Probably a lot. Maybe you'd go on eBay. Maybe you'd put one up tonight and see.

(The bids climbed faster than you could even comprehend, hundreds to thousands to a few hundred thousand. You might have yelled a bit. Jason, who had been sitting next to you at the time, had given you a confused look before peering over to look at your laptop. He had laughed so hard then and told you that his dad would definitely not be happy about this.)