#barry keoghan and yn

[thefallennightmare]

Broken-eight

*credit to whoever credit the gif. found on google/pinterest*

Pairings: Barry Keoghan x Reader

Warnings: angst, swearing, fluff, implied smut, mentions of alcoholism and death.

Summary: A failed marriage wasn't in the cards for Reader, she thought she found her happily ever after with Barry. While trying to overcome the heartbreak, a tragic event brings them back together temporarily. Will the devastating loss bring them back together or be what pushes them apart for good?

Authors Note: I've noticed a bit more traction with this story since the last update. Makes me very happy!

The house was an eerie, unsettling quiet, as the only noise that echoed throughout the house was the dreaded grandfather clock. I always hated that thing, my mom did as well. It was my dad that brought it home one day, years ago. He used to love antiquing, and I could remember his exact words and the way he said it on that day. 

“Oi, quit your whining. It’s a beautiful clock, almost as beautiful as you.” My dad mused while kissing my mom on the lips. 

Their love was like any other, never fighting, always being by each other's side no matter what they went through. I had always strived to find a love like that, promised myself that I wouldn’t settle until I did and for a while, I thought it did with Barry. How wrong and naive I was. 

With a soft sigh, I pinched my eyes shut in hopes to stop the tears from falling. I had done enough crying for the day, hell maybe even the week, when I returned home from my therapy session. After Barry had walked out to answer his phone call, I gave an apologetic smile to Ms. Rogers before sauntering out past Barry. I decided not to get a ride back home with him, upset about the way he acted during our session, and got a taxi instead. Barry never even looked away from his phone as I stormed out of the therapy office. 

That was a few hours ago and I had been alone since then. No word from Barry on where he was or if he was coming back. There was a small ounce of hope that he was so upset and angry with the session that he decided I wasn’t worth it anymore and went back to his own place. 

“I can only wish,” I mumbled to myself as I kept myself busy by sorting through the stack of mail. 

Typical bills or letters, a few cards offering their condolences, and at the bottom of the stack was the dreaded manila envelope that I had yet to open. I was afraid to find out what my parents had left me in their will or if there was anything left to leave me. However, I knew I couldn’t put it off forever, whatever was in the envelope needed a final decision soon. 

My eyes glanced over to the empty bar cart and I silently wished there was even half a bottle left. Anything to give me the courage to open the envelope. 

The grandfather clock chimed loudly six times, indicating it was now six in the evening. With a check of my phone, I realized that Barry hadn’t called or texted me and came to the conclusion that he had in fact returned to his own home. 

I tapped my foot, weighing the decision between my shoulders almost as if there was an angel on one and a devil on the other. 

Stay home and waste another night in front of the television or go to the pub that was a short walk and enjoy one drink. 

It was only one drink, what could hurt? Barry was gone which meant that whatever deal we had was officially off of the table. 

Before I could second guess the decision I had made, I snatched my keys from the bowl next to the front door, my footsteps bounding down the concrete steps. 

“One drink,” I said out loud to myself. 

“Where ya headed?” 

My feet halted as I nearly ran into the body that stood in front of me with a suitcase in one hand and a brown bag in the other. 

“Barry?” I asked. 

His brow raised. “Again I ask, where ya headed?” 

My mouth ran dry as I tried to come up with an excuse. “I was running to the market quickly. We’re out of eggs.” 

Barry motioned to the paper bag in his left hand. “I already went. Try again.” 

“Why don’t you tell me where you’ve been all afternoon?” 

As much as I tried, I couldn’t hide the jealous tone from my voice. The thoughts of where he was or who he was with wouldn't stop the entire time he was gone. 

He merely shook his head before walking past me into the house. “Jealousy never looked good on ya, Y/N.” 

I scoffed, offended, and followed him back inside. 

“I am not jealous. I just wanted to know where you’ve been? I thought you went back home,” I said while tossing my keys back into the bowl. 

“Is that why you were headed to the pub?” He asked while putting away the groceries. 

My mouth pulled to a thin line, my silence being the answer he needed. 

“I thought we had a deal?” Barry sighed while looking directly at me. 

I bit down hard at the inside of my cheek to keep the snarky remark to myself. 

“Well, I thought the deal was off since you disappeared all afternoon,” I reiterated my words from earlier.

He sat down on the couch while I kept my hands sprawled on the back of it, looking down at him. There was a tiredness in his eyes and suddenly I felt a pang of guilt. 

“After my phone call with the promoter, I decided to head back to the gym for another quick spar. The guy I’m fighting in big time around here. I want to make sure I’m prepared,” Barry explained, him still looking up at me. 

I nodded, moving around the couch to sit, making sure there was still some space between us. 

“I also had to grab some more clothes,” he motioned to his suitcase next to the front door. “I’ve got five days left with ya but can’t keep wearing the same clothes.” 

“Oh,” I nodded again, eyes looking over to the other couch in the room that still had the blankets and pillows from his slumber last night. 

“Is the couch fine?” I asked. “I feel terrible knowing there’s another bed for you to sleep in. It’s my parents but.” 

My words trailed off, the strength to finish the sentence faltering at the mention of my parents. Barry immediately understood and placed a soft hand on my thigh. 

“I’m fine with the couch. It’s only for a few more days,” he said. 

The way my stomach fell made me realize that as much as we had been fighting lately, I was going to miss him when he did in fact leave. 

“So,” I adjusted myself on the couch, Barry’s hand falling away. “Can we talk about the therapy session?” 

He sighed and ran a hand over his face. “I don’t see how we got anywhere when all she cared about was our sex life?” 

“I mean, it was an honest question she asked us. You said it yourself, we got married young.” 

“What did you want me to say? That all I cared for during our marriage was sex?” Barry asked. 

I pointed between us. “We did start off as friends with benefits.” 

“I know,” he nodded while pursing his lips slightly. “But if I remember correctly, you were the one that said no strings attached.” 

“Yet, I was the one who fell the hardest,” I muttered while cracking my knuckles. 

With the way Barry sighed, I knew he had heard my voice even if I tried to keep it to myself. 

“Y/N,” he squeezed his eyes shut. “I don’t know what else you want from me.” 

Anger began to boil low in my stomach but refused to get upset with him just yet. There was something I wanted to know, something that Ms. Rogers asked him before our session ended.

“Do you still love me?”

The question wavered, my voice cracking on the word love.

Barry lifted his head from the back of the couch and stared at me, lips parting slightly. His pupils dilated before avoiding my own gaze, staring at his hands in his lap. 

“I do-.” 

He was cut off by the sudden loud ringing of his phone and I started to wonder if he had somehow rigged it to interrupt our important conversations as a way to get out of it. 

I was about to tell him not to answer when the flash image of a blonde appeared on the screen, my heart dropping low in my belly. 

Alyi. 

“I thought you two broke up,” I said. 

“I never said that,” Barry responded, his thumb ghosting between the answer and decline button. 

I hummed. “Then why won’t you answer it?” 

With a quick decision, Barry hit the red decline button before pocketing his phone. 

“I don’t feel like fighting with someone else right now,” he shrugged. 

I shook my head. “We’re not fighting.” 

He let out a low chuckle. “That’s all we ever do.” 

“Then why are you still here, Barry?” 

“For you,” he said. “To make sure you get sober again and stay sober.” 

My eyes rolled to the back of my head and I stood to my feet. “It’s been two days. I haven't had a drink since the night of my parents' funeral. Clearly, I’m doing fine and don’t need you here anymore.” 

There was some hostility to my voice, something Barry picked up on immediately. 

“Fine?” he stood to his own feet, his height towering over me a bit. “If you’re fine, then how come you haven’t read through their will yet?” 

I blinked, unsure how to answer. 

“It’s none of your business. I’m waiting until you leave to read it,” I crossed my arms over my chest. 

“Another excuse,” Barry shook his head before brushing past me, towards the bathroom. “I need to shower.” 

“Oh, fuck you!” I snapped, the anger I did my best to keep at bay exploding within me. “I tried to have a civil conversation with you but you're the one that always makes it into a fight.” 

“I’ll talk to ya once you’ve calmed down,” he called over his shoulder. 

Barry came to a quick halt right outside of the bathroom door when he felt a pillow crash into his back. I had another one in my hands ready to throw when he turned to face me, eyebrow raised to his hairline. 

“Did ya throw a pillow at me?” 

“I want to do a lot more,” I seethed. “I want to smack that smug smile off your face.” 

Barry took a few steps towards me, the smug smile he wore almost an invitation. Do it, it practically screamed. 

“You’re so fucking infuriating,” I yelled throwing the pillow at him. 

He smacked it away, it falling to the floor at his feet, but continued to close the distance between us. 

“Stop throwing pillows,” he said with an even tone. 

“I don’t need you here, Barry! You’re making everything worse!” 

He stopped about a foot away from me, eyes twinkling with a mischievous gleam as he caught another pillow I chucked at him. I groaned in annoyance, ready to throw something else, anything else at him in hopes he knew exactly how angry he was making me. 

I was doing fine without him. Yes, I relapsed but I could come back from it. I always did. It was only a moment of weakness, given everything I had gone through the last year I say it was justified. Barry being here did make everything worse. Seeing him every morning when I wake or being around him in general made all of the feelings I had to force myself to bury slowly creep back into my heart. 

“Tell me to leave,” Barry said nonchalantly. 

My bottom lip caught between my teeth, but I held my head high. “I don’t need you here anymore.” 

He clicked his tongue while leaning closer towards me, his warm breath fanning my mouth. “Not the same thing, grá .” 

That nickname. The same nickname he had called me so many times before caused my heart to soar into my throat and I shuddered at the lowness of his voice. 

My eyes bounced from his mouth up to his own eyes and when I moisten my dry lips, I let out a deep breath. 

“I’d be fine if I never saw you again.” 

Barry moved a strand of loose hair behind my ear, fingers grazing over the skin of my neck. My entire body shuddered with pure euphoric bliss when I felt his hand scratch at the hairs on my scalp, eyes fluttering shut with a hushed moan falling from my lips. 

“We both know that’s a lie,” he mused while his other hand traced down the skin of my arm. 

Damn him. Barry knew exactly where to touch me, all these years later, to make me a puddled mess in his hands. I was like a dog that was getting his ears scratched. It was pathetic. 

Seven chimes from the grandfather clock struck which caused me to jump in Barry’s light embrace and I stepped away from him, his hands falling to his side. 

“Is this a joke to you?” I blew out a shaky breath. 

The smugness faltered from his face. “What?” 

“My feelings,” I said, feeling the tears caught on my lashes. 

Barry quickly shook his head. “Of course not.” 

“Then why do you keep messing with my head? You say you don’t love me anymore but yet touch me the way you used to or call me the names I loved once before.” 

“I never said that.” he said, not missing a beat. 

It was my turn to look at him confused. “What?” 

With his hands stuffed deep into his pockets, he let out a deep sigh. “I never said I didn’t love you anymore.” 

As that was his parting words, Barry turned his back to me, retreating into the bathroom. 

[vroomvroommuppett]

i am looking for more people to talk to on here, and my ask box is open, so don’t be afraid to send any asks!

here are the guidelines

please be 18+

[eternallyfatedjadedspaded]

don't you dare put that thing back where it came from, or so help me! *Demonic seductress dance version of the monsters inc. musical number ensues*

i feel like i should be covering my eyes. put it away like my god save some for the rest of us t-boys *eyeroll*

[kindestofkings]

nepobaby² [pt.2]

elijah hewson x pop singer! reader

description: people hate to see a hot girl killing it, so much so that tmz starts rumours that spread like wildfire.

authors note: heyy this is a random part two to this ! so go enjoy and tell me what you think :))

tmz

liked by inhalerfan1 and others

tmz 🚨 Scandal Alert 🚨 TMZ exclusive: Shocking photos reveal yourusername caught in a steamy affair with a Saltburn's heartthrob Barry Keoghan, despite being in a relationship of over 3 years! 😱💔

Stay tuned as we uncover all the juicy details behind this explosive cheating scandal.

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inhalerfan1 omg what a slut! always knew she was no good for Eli

inhalerfan2 she's so fame hungry going after the most popular irish celeb, watch out paul mescal

ynfan1 nooooo girl nooooo

ynfanupdates

liked by ynfan1 and others

ynfanupdates ehhhh guys did you see all this?? yn and eli were spotted together like a week ago what the hell is going on??

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ynfan1 I refuse to believe this is true, she's not like that

inhalerfan2 oh and you know her so well do you? ynfan1 maybe not but I do know tmz have lied in the past! they have no journalistic integrity

ynfan2 she must of really REALLY enjoyed saltburn

inhalerfan1 I will never listen to her again disgusting behaviour

deuxmoi

liked by inhalerfan1 and others

deuxmoi just hours after the news broke that his girlfriend of 3 years is cheating on him, elijah hewson is the picture of heartbroken at his show and their interviews :(

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inhalerfan1 omg baby, #ynisoverparty

inhalerfan2 this is crazy, how could she do this to him while they're touring !

ynfan1 we don't even know if the rumours are true!! inhalerfan1 evidence is pretty stacked against your girl

inhalerfan3 can't wait for the single Eli era !!

yourusername just posted on their close friends!

this is hell there was 6 other people at that dinner and we got in separate cars home

replies:

bobbyskeetz yeah didn't think you fucked with barry like that

↳ ...... bobbyskeetz too soon? yeah just a bit man

taylorswift they are ruthless! please call me gorgeous, you're not alone in this xx

trumanblack are you in LA right now?

↳ I am yeah why does that matter rn matthew trumanblack just wanted to make sure I booked the flight to the right place. ↳ matttttt I'm gonna cry (even more)

ynfanupdates

liked by ynfan1 and others

ynfanupdates THIS IS NOT THE FACE OF A CHEATER. Also look how in love those two are !!! I dont not believe tmz on bit. ALSO people are being so mean to her. LEAVE HER ALONE!!!

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ynfan1 couldn’t said it better myself

ynfan2 people hate to see a hot girl slay.

tmz

liked by 1975fan1 and others

tmz big brother to the rescue ? looks like the Healy siblings are sticking together through thick and thin. our cameras caught the eldest Healy sibling rushing to the states to support his little sister amidst her massive cheating scandal! 👀

looks like getting cancelled runs in the family huh...

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1975fan1 oh he looks pissed

ynfan1 omg the poor girl she looks in bits 💔

inhalerfan1 consequences of her actions ynfan2 WE DONT EVEN KNOW IF ITS TRUE NONE OF THEM HAVE COME OUT AND SAID ANYTHING inhalerfan1 you are clearly unhinged babe xxx

inhalerfan1 great job playing the victim girl, what about eli x

elijahhewson

liked by yourusername and others

elijahhewson stop making shit up to sell you papers. this is the love of my life who was at a group dinner, leave her be.

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bobbyskeetz ready to go to war for my favourite couple

ryanmcmahon_15 me too !

inhalerfan1 holy shit eli's is off private oh my GOD

inhalerfan2 it’s happening! everyone stay calm

trumanblack fair play mate

denisewelch its all so silly, clearly haven't seen how in love you two are !!

taylorswift glad to see her smiling again <3

ynfan1 I KNEW IT my parents could never .

ynfanupdates hope she's okay people were so mean to her..

yourusername

liked by elijahhewson and others

yourusername please learn to be nicer while I disappear x

comments have been turned off.

ynfanupdates

liked by ynfan1 and others

ynfanupdates it’s officially been a year and a half since we’ve heard anything from or even seen yourusername 🥲 I really respect her taking some time after that crazy barry situation but this is HARD

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ynfan1 noo I’m the same, I do be missing her bops

ynfan2 fr feels like we’ve been put in the worlds longest time out

ynfanupdates especially with that last insta post 😔

yourusername posted to their close friends!

replies:

charli_xcx yessss queen the world is not readyyyy

↳ AHHH thank you C <33

rass75 AOTY pending?

↳ heheh idk ! genre change pending tho …

taylorswift cannot wait to hear what you're working on !

↳ and what if you hopped on a track?

yourusername

liked by elijahhewson and others

yourusername is there anyone out there?

come spend some time with me within the echoes of solitude, there might be some familiar faces x

// this is me trying  / the lakes / mad woman / my tears ricochet / mirrorball / slut! (feat. Taylor Swift) / let the light in (feat. Elijah Hewson) / both sides now (feat. Joni Mitchell) / coney island (feat. Matty Healy) //

out in TWO weeks !

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jackantonoff lets fuckin GO

trumanblack so moody, almost emo?

yourusername coming for your gig big bro x

gabriette woooo they are not ready !

charlixcx AHHHH so buzzed (for all the sadness)

ynfan2 ah a sad album?? yourusername im sorry to confirm its not very pop 💔 ynfan2 so heartbroken ! but can't wait to hear it all, welcome back <3

elijahhewson so proud of you beautiful

ynfan1 OMG SHE'S BACK

ynfan2 oh no she looks so sad :(( slut! is gonna break me

ynfanupdates okay queen is back to dominate a new genre !

vogue

liked by yourusername and others

vogue our next edition unveils an exclusive interview with our beloved pop sensation! emerging from a year of solitude, she opens up about her toughest career moment yet and her newfound carefree spirit, crediting the unwavering support of friends, family, and the love of her life! don't miss out on the latest scoop - grab your copy and dive into her inspiring journey!

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yourusername ahhhhh thanks for having me !!!

ynfan1 oh she slayss

ynfan2 bless her, the part where she talks about how nervous she is about not releasing a new pop album broke my heart

ynfan1 fr she doesn't get how much we love her ! yourusername AWH you guys !!!!

inhalerfan1 the love of her life .... her and eli are the cutest

yourusername

liked by trumanblack and others

yourusername HI again ! soooo I felt a tinnie bit bad that I'm abandoning my roots, espically so close to summer sooo....

espresso a certified bop* is out now xxxx

*certification is from my boyfriend so possible bias there ..

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ynfan1 holy shit I LOVE YOU

ynfan2 eli is so in love im OBSESSED

charlixcx so hot omfg

bobbyskeetz man is whipped

yourusername isnt it that sweet?! bobbyskeetz i guess so 🙄 elijahhewson espresso

finished

hehehe this is so dramatic and for WHAt?! but I love and had so much fun making it. ENJOY <33

ALSO requests are open aswell so it me up xx

[druigvoid]

Grapes

Pairing: Druig x reader

Summary: Grapes are one of Druig's favorite snacks, and of course he shares it with you.

Warning: fluff, fluff and more fluff.

Is this a bit cheesy? Yes. Did I eat grapes while writing this? Yes. This is honestly a really short drabble for Druig. Nothing special. Enjoy!!

Grapes, grapes, grapes. Druig loves them. You would see him just munching on some almost every day. He would casually walk up to you with a hand full of them and offer you some. It was a small gesture of love. He would always give you fruits and sweets to share with.

"Hello my love, what are you doing?" You could hear his voice behind you, slowly getting louder as he walks towards you. You could hear him munching on some food near your ear. Some would fine it gross, but you found it adorable.

"I'm helping Phastos with one of his new inventions." You placed your materials down and faced him. Arms crossed against your chest. "Well, what is it?" He asked you. "I don't know yet honestly."

He took his hand out of his pocket and offered you some grapes. You laughed before taking one and throwing it into your mouth. "Why are you laughing?" His face was confused but in a playful way with a smile on his face. "Nothing it's just I find it adorable how you always have grapes on you." You turned away from him, facing the table and getting back to work. He hummed and ate all his grapes before hugging you from behind, resting his head on your shoulder. He muttered a little I love you which made your heart melt. Like it always does.

[greenorangevioletgrass]

whoohoo! the new barry x actress!reader fic is OUT NOW! happy reading and lmk what you think 🥰

[thefallennightmare]

Broken-four

*credit to whoever created the gif. found on google/Pinterest*

Pairings: Barry Keoghan x Reader

Warnings: angst, swearing, fluff, implied smut, mentions of alcoholism and death.

Summary: A failed marriage wasn't in the cards for Reader, she thought she found her happily ever after with Barry. While trying to overcome the heartbreak, a tragic event brings them back together temporarily. Will the devastating loss bring them back together or be what pushes them apart for good?

Authors Note: Even if no one is reading this, I'm still continuing it because I like to read it back.

Birds chirping melded with the sounds of soft sobs as I stood broken, eyes boring into the large hole in the ground, the two caskets being lowered down slowly. There wasn’t anyone around me, opting to let me mourn my parents' solo, and I was thankful for that because I didn’t want them to see the way my body swayed or smelled the alcohol on my breath. 

Tears welled in my eyes as the caskets fell deeper into the ground and once it was out of sight, the wall I had built to protect me from the last couple days finally shattered. My shoulders shook as the sobs washed over me, small screams of my pain echoing through the large, open area of the cemetery. 

No one made a move, unsure what to do to console me, as my entire world crumbled six feet below. My knees buckled and as I prepared myself for hitting the ground, strong arms wrapped around me to hold me up. His large hand pressed circles on my back while his soft voice cooed in my ear. 

“I got ya. It’s a’right. I’m right here.” 

I buried my face into Barry’s chest, his familiar scent lingering in my senses, and my arms wrapped around him tight. 

“They can’t be gone,” I sobbed. “I have no one left.” Barry hushed me by placing a gentle kiss on my hairline. “I’m here, grá.”

Wet eyes stared up at him when I heard the all too familiar word utter from his lips. 

Grá.

Love. 

He used to call me that all the time when we first got together, the pet name faltering from Barry’s vocabulary so long ago. He knew the way it affected me, I could see it in the way his face softened, an apology spewing from his mouth. 

“Force of habit,” he sighed. 

I looked back to the ground, still in his embrace, and the two of us watched the dirt fill up the grave. Everyone else around me had slowly begun to leave, not wanting to get in between Barry and I. 

Soon, we were the only two left and that was when Barry gently squeezed my shoulder. 

“It’s time, Y/N.” 

I shook my head, weak, unable to say anything. 

“Come on, I’ll take ya back home,” he said. 

“I don’t have a home,” I murmured, broken. 

A sorrowful sigh fell from Barry’s lips before he began leading me away from the now buried grave and towards his car, not allowing me to fight against him. To be honest, I had no energy to do that. I was beyond mentally drained and the only thing I wanted to do was crawl away underneath a blanket and sleep away the rest of the day. 

“Oh, fuck,” I groaned turning over in bed. 

The setting sun was blasting its rays through the curtains of my childhood bedroom and it felt as if my brain was being squeezed tight, the hangover from the last few days raging to life. 

I ran my hands over my face, letting out a few deep breaths to give myself a sort of pep talk to rise from bed. The growling in my stomach reminded me that I hadn't eaten anything in a while but I wasn’t sure if the sickness I felt washing over me was because of that or the previous hangover. 

The rest of the day had been a blur, the only thing I really remember was Barry bringing me back to my parents house after the funeral and I fought against him as he tried to bring me inside. 

“You’re drunk, Y/N.” 

I pushed him away, stumbling up the concrete steps. “Fuck you, Barry. I’m fine.” 

He watched me with disappointment in his eyes and I nearly tripped over my feet while walking in the house, the door slamming behind me. 

I wasn’t sure how I made it safely in bed but didn’t dwell on it for long as I rolled out of bed, my feet dragging down the short hallway. I came to a sudden halt at the sight in front of me. Barry was in the kitchen, towel tossed over his shoulder, as he was finishing up cooking a rather large meal, my favorite meal. 

His eyes fell on me, a small smile pulling at his lips. “Oh, good. You’re awake. I was about to come check on ya.” 

I pointed to the two plates on the table, surrounded by the steaming food. “What’s this?” 

“Figured you’d need something in your stomach to fight that hangover,” Barry informed. 

“You didn’t leave?” I asked, unmoving. 

Barry nodded towards the table. “Sit.” 

“I’m not hungry,” I lied. 

Then the heavens above wanted to laugh at my expense because my stomach growled, loudly, and Barry simply raised a brow at me. 

“Sit, now.” 

With a sigh, I obeyed and sat at the far end of the table and watched as he placed food on my plate and pointed to it. 

“I want ya to eat half of that at least,” Barry ordered. 

“Yes, dad,” I grumbled while stuffing my face with the food. 

Oh, how I missed his cooking. 

He was always the chef in the relationship. 

Barry sat across from me and we ate in silence, the only sounds coming from the grandfather clock ticking away from its place in the living room and our forks scraping against the plates. 

He slid over a tall glass of water to me and I didn’t bother fighting him against it, knowing that he wouldn’t allow me to have even a sip of alcohol. 

“How’s the hangover?” Barry asked while grabbing our empty plates from the table. 

I shrugged. “I’ve had worse.” 

He hummed in response then began cleaning the kitchen as my eyes trained hard on his form, seeing the way his back muscles tensed underneath his shirt brought back so many memories. Most of them being us tangled together in the sheets. 

I shifted in my seat, hoping it would scratch the itch I felt burning low in my core. 

“Barry?” My voice came out quiet, the sudden question nagging inside my head. 

“Ya?”

He didn’t bother to look away from the sink full of dishes that he had been washing. 

“Why did you stay? I’m sure you’ve got a lot going on right now,” I asked. 

His actions halted briefly and finally locked eyes with me. “If I’m being honest, Y/N, I planned on leaving after the wake but when I realized that you were drinking again I knew that I couldn’t leave ya; not yet.” 

I cracked my knuckles under the table, a nervous habit, and sighed. “I relapsed, it’s fine. I can get sober again, I’ve done it before.” 

With the last few plates washed, Barry set them to the side and dried his hands, leaning against the counter. 

“Cause I was there for ya.” 

I scoffed. “Oh, and now you are? Let's be real, Barry. You’re only here because my parents died, you said it yourself.” 

“Y/N,” he started. 

The chair scraped against the hardwood floor as I stood, not wanting to get into this fight with him. 

“I’m not dealing with this right now,” I said. 

I tried to make a break for the front door, needing some fresh air but Barry knew me all too well, knowing where exactly I had planned on going. He stopped me in my path by standing in front of me. 

“Yer not going anywhere,” he said. 

“Move,” I demanded with hard eyes. 

Barry didn’t budge. 

“I’m not going to say it again, Barry. Fucking move,” I seethed. 

He shook his head. “You’ll have to fight me. I’m not letting you go to the pubs tonight.” 

“God, you’re so infuriating!” I yelled, pushing at his hard chest.

My push did nothing to move him. 

“Why did you come back?” I pushed him again. 

“Did you come back to rub it in my face that I’ve lost everyone?” 

This push was a bit harder but did nothing against him, as he sucked in a bottom lip, body swaying a bit. 

“Are you happy to see that I’m a fucking failing after our divorce? I have no home, no parents, no husband. Nothing!” 

He sucked in a bottom lip, body swaying a bit. 

This push did make him stumble a bit but he regained his composure rather quickly. Tears had begun to fester in my eyes but I did everything I could to keep them at bay, not allowing them to spill over my cheeks. 

“Why don’t you love me anymore?!” 

My voice echoed through the small home as I gave one last push on Barry’s chest, watching him fall onto the couch behind him. Tears fell to the ground at my feet and I licked up the saltiness from my lips, sobs wrecking my body. 

Barry looked up at me with sad eyes and went to reach for my hand. 

“Y/N, please-.” 

I smacked his hand away. “Don’t fucking touch me! Is this what you wanted? To completely break me? Well congratulations, you’ve succeeded. You can leave now.” 

I stormed away from him, fingers almost reaching for the bottle of vodka on the bar cart as I passed it. Once I was back in my bedroom, I let the door slam behind me, locking Barry out literally and figuratively.

[thefallennightmare]

Broken-five

*credit to whoever created the gif. found on google/Pinterest*

Pairings: Barry Keoghan x Reader

Warnings: angst, swearing, fluff, implied smut, mentions of alcoholism and death.

Summary: A failed marriage wasn't in the cards for Reader, she thought she found her happily ever after with Barry. While trying to overcome the heartbreak, a tragic event brings them back together temporarily. Will the devastating loss bring them back together or be what pushes them apart for good?

Authors Note: enjoy to whoever it is reading this!

Gone were the morning sun rays, now the afternoon blaze blasted into the windows of my bedroom, warming up my body. A loud groan echoed off of the walls as I slowly sat up in bed, glaring at the brightness of the sun, its happiness causing my stomach to rile with disgust. 

Didn’t it know that I was trying to mourn, my parents and a hangover?

The blankets were thrown off of me as I reluctantly got out of bed, for one thing. 

More alcohol. 

I silently prayed that I was alone, Barry leaving last night when I asked him too. The last thing I needed while I drowned in my sorrows were his judgment or disappointed eyes. 

My feet halted, almost screeching against the hardwood floors, as I took in the sight in front of me of the empty bar cart. Every single bottle of booze was gone and it was the same for the cabinets where I knew my parents hid the extras. 

“What the fuck,” I grumbled. 

Had I been in such a tired haze last night that I either drank them all or poured them out without remembering? 

Suddenly, a deep voice sounded from outside on the patio and by how fast he was speaking, I knew something wasn’t right. His back was to me, the muscles under his shirt tightened as he leaned farther over the railing, letting out an annoyed breath. 

“I'm sorry, but she needs me. I can't leave her. Christ, she just lost her parents. Can't you have some respect for that?....We were married, not anymore.” 

The way Barry stressed the word ‘were’ made my stomach drop, trying to prove a point to whoever he was on the phone with. 

“There's nothing between us, I was the one who asked for a divorce, Alyi…..No, I'm pretty sure she hates me, there's no more love there….I'm staying because I can't leave her, she needs help….

He stood straighter, back rigid, as he placed a hand on his hip and let out a breath. "I can't answer that because I'm afraid ya won't like the answer....Yeah, whatever Alyi.”

Barry spewed a few curses before pocketing his phone and as he turned to face me, he tried his best to give me a small smile. He failed, though, his anger being too much. 

“Who was that?” I asked while crossing my arms. 

He shook his head. “No one.” 

I hummed. “Well, it seems like this ‘no one’ is pretty upset about you staying here with me.” 

“Ya well, she’ll get over it,” Barry more so told himself.

“I don’t need your help, Barry. I’ve been doing fine on my own the past year,” I defended. 

“Right,” he nodded, running a hand over his chin. “That’s why you were just looking for a drink?”

My jaw went slack as I pointed a thumb over my shoulder. “Did you have something to do with the missing booze?” 

Barry scoffed while leaning his back against the railing now. “You’d really think I’d leave stacks on stacks of bottles here with you?” 

“This is fucking ridiculous,” I stormed back inside to get far away from him. 

It did nothing to deter him, Barry following me close behind. 

“Do you not see how bad of a problem you have, Y/N? It’s barely noon.” 

I spun on my heels, my hair flowing over my shoulder. “What I do is none of your business, Barry.” 

“Isn’t it?” He stretched his arms out wide. “I’m here with ya because I’m afraid of what might happen if I leave.” 

“Did you forget that you were the one that wanted the divorce?” I reminded him, voice raising a bit. 

“Oh for Christ sakes,” Barry ran a hand through his hair. “Your relapse has nothing to do with the divorce. 

I stared at him for a moment, completely dumbfounded that he was so naive to think that and a low scoff left my lips. 

“It has everything to do with it! You threw away everything for some girl you met at an after party? You knew her for all of two minutes and suddenly you decided to have an affair?!” 

Barry pointed a finger at me while shaking his head. “I was faithful to ya the entire relationship, Y/N. Don’t go saying stuff you have no idea about.” 

“Bullshit,” I spat. “It’s all over the internet, Barry! Pictures of you and her together. Did you even think about how I felt, seeing them so soon after we signed the papers?” 

His own anger faltered, only for a second, when he saw the lone tear that ran down my cheek. When I noticed him staring, I hastily wiped it away, refusing to let him get the satisfaction of hurting me once more. 

“This was a mistake,” I breathed. “Drunk texting you. If I kept my feelings to myself, you wouldn’t be here right now and I wouldn’t have to deal with this.” 

I pointed between us. 

“Please leave,” I begged.

Barry didn’t move, simply stood in front of me with his hands deep into the pockets of his pants. 

“I’m not leaving you.” 

His voice came out hushed and I had to strain my ears in order to hear him. 

“Please,” I begged once more, tears now falling from my eyes. 

Barry shook his head, biting his lower lip, as he closed the distance between us by placing a tender hand on my cheek. Fire spread all throughout my body, feeling his touch in so long that it brought back so many memories and I whimpered, eyes fluttered shut. 

“One week. Promise me you’ll stay sober for one week and then I’ll be gone,” Barry suggested.

Our eyes locked and I almost pulled away, told him to fuck off, not needing to make a promise for a problem I don’t have. But I realized that if I did agree to this, I could go the week with no drinking and then he’d be gone. I wouldn’t have to worry about him anymore or see his aggravating face. 

His beautiful, strong boned, aggravating face. 

“Okay,” I nodded, still in his embrace. 

We continued to stare at each other, his bright eyes piercing deep into me and my heart skipped a beat when the magnetic pull between us became too strong to ignore. I felt myself melting into him, like I did so many times before. He must have realized what was about to happen because Barry let out a low cough and stepped away from me, his hand dropping to his side. 

“I’ll stay on the couch. Do you parents still keep the extra blankets and pillows in the hall closet?” Barry rubbed the back of his neck. 

The corner of my lip pulled up in a small smile as he remembered that tiny detail from so many years ago. 

I nodded and shifted on my feet. “Yeah.” 

We stayed there for a few more seconds with Barry’s tongue wetting his bottom lip, before I pointed to the bathroom. “I think I’m going to take a shower.” 

There was a quick flash in his eyes as he hummed low, a deep rumble in his chest.  The tension around us shifted on the tether of angry conversation towards a very suggestive one. 

Before either of us did something we would regret, I scurried past him and decided to stay hidden in the bathroom until the burning itch faded from between my legs.

[thefallennightmare]

Broken-nine

*credit to me(the-fallen-nightmare) for creating the gif*

Pairings: Barry Keoghan x Reader

Warnings: angst, swearing, fluff, smut, mentions of alcoholism and death

Summary: A failed marriage wasn't in the cards for Reader, she thought she found her happily ever after with Barry. While trying to overcome the heartbreak, a tragic event brings them back together temporarily. Will the devastating loss bring them back together or be what pushes them apart for good?

Authors Note: hope everyone likes this update! Things are calming down between the reader and Barry, for now.

I stared through my open bedroom door, eyes not locking onto anything in particular. My mind was racing with so many thoughts I wasn’t sure which to think more. Barry’s soft features on his face as he looked at me with so much adoration in his blue pupils as the words fell from his plump lips. 

“I never said I didn’t love you anymore.” 

Those were his parting words for the night and after twelve hours, I hadn’t seen him since. While he was showering, I locked myself in my bedroom for the rest of the night, not wanting to see him afraid of what would happen. There were still so many unanswered questions that I did my best not to spew because as much as Barry irritated me while he was here, I still wasn't ready for him to leave. 

It’s baffling how things have changed between us recently. A week ago, I had despised him for how he ended our marriage, ready to move on from him to start anew. But with him being it, Barry made it harder to do that.

With a loud sigh, I turned in bed and brought the blanket closer to my chin. The window in my room was wide open, a lovely breezy cascade over the makeshift fort I had created and I forced my eyes shut trying to get a few more minutes of sleep. When I went to bed last night, I had a busy day to look forward to. This morning, however, my day was wide open because of the split last-minute decision. Today was Barry’s fight and as far as he knew, I was still coming with him. He would leave shortly for the gym and I knew I had to tell him I was staying home. I dreaded it, not wanting to see the look on his face.

All hope of having a bit more time faltered when there was a soft knock on the wood of the doorframe leading to my bedroom.

“Hm?”

I turned over in bed and saw Barry with a gym bag gripped in one hand, brows raised in confusion.

“Why aren’t ya ready?”

After I cleared my throat, I sat up in bed. “I’m going to stay home.”

He looked at me with even more confusion than his eyebrows showed.

“Why? Ya feel alright?”

“Yeah,” I nodded while wringing my hands together underneath the blanket, “With our fight last night I think I shouldn’t go.”

As much as he tried to hide it, I didn’t miss how his eyes fell ever so slightly along his shoulders.

“We fought?” Barry asked.

A low scoff left my lips. “That’s all we ever do, Barry. Tonight is important for you and the last thing I want to do is have another fight with you.”

He shook his head. “We won’t.”

No matter how hard he tried to beg me with his eyes, I would not change my mind.

My eyes shifted to the clock on the wall and motioned to the hallway behind him. “You should probably go. I don’t want to be the reason you’re late.”

“Y/N,” Barry sighed.

I showed him my back yet again and called over my shoulder. “Good luck.”

The soles of my feet pounded hard on the pavement as I neared the end of my one-mile run. It wasn’t much to some people’s standards, but it was what I could handle at the moment. I decided that running would be a way to curb the desire for alcohol. Any time I would feel the urge to take a sip, I would strap on my running shoes and go for a jog. It was the first day of this but so far; it seemed to work.

As my run became a slow walk to calm my heart rate down, I let out a few deep breaths while I checked my phone.

No new notifications.

I ignored the way my stomach dropped, hoping that Barry would have texted me one last time before his fight begging me to come. Secretly, I wanted to. So bad. But I needed to extend the space between us. We had spent almost every hour with each other the last few days, it would be good for us and our relationship if we spent the night away from each other.

I sighed and kept walking the last half mile back to my house, the green lands of the small town in Ireland being my sense of peace. I had grown up here, the familiarity of it all brought up the corners of my lips in a smile. The way the hill off in the distance cast a shadow over the houses on my left as the sun went down or how Mrs. Dohle had married, had kids, lost her husband, and now spends her days in her shuttered home all while I had grown up in my house. Everything about my neighborhood I had loved which is why it was so bittersweet to leave years ago. While I needed a new change in my life, Ireland always held a warm place in my heart and I always told myself that I would come back. Although, I was hoping it would have been under different circumstances.

When Barry and I first met in Los Angeles, we thought it baffling that we had grown up only twenty minutes away from each other. We always used to joke that’s what made us fall in love, that we came from the same place and could relate in so many ways.

“Oh gosh, Y/N is that you?”

My feet came to a halt when my eyes landed on the red-headed girl in front of me and with a strained smile, I nodded.

“Nora, hi,” I smiled.

She shook her head dumbfounded that I was here, standing in front of her. “I heard rumors you were back in town but didn’t believe them. There was no way you’d come back here.”

I bit down hard on the inside of my cheek, doing my best to keep my rising anger in check. Nora and I had grown up together and let’s just say, she was anything but my friend. There would be nights that I would come home crying after a long day at school with Nora bullying me about something. My parents were always there to soothe my cries, dry my tears, and pick me up while dusting off my shoulders.

“Hurtful words mean nothing against us. We rise above them.”

My mother's voice echoed in my ear; our family motto.

Blinking back the tears, I nodded. “I didn’t plan on it but with my parents-.”

The rest of my sentence trailed away, unable to finish the words.

Nora’s eyes filled with sorrow. “I’m so sorry about your parents.”

I stared at her astonished that for once in her life, Nora sounded genuinely sorry.

“Barry told me. How are you holding up?” She continued.

My teeth chewed at the inside of my lip at the jealousy bubbling deep within my gut. “You talked to Barry?”

Nora nodded, knowing that she was getting under my skin. “Yeah. We met up at the pub the other night. I asked where you were because I wanted to make sure you were doing alright. But Barry said you were back home in bed, still dealing with your parent’s death.”

I scoffed. There was no way in hell Nora was worried about me and how I was doing. She wanted to make sure that I was out of the way to make a move on Barry. When we married and moved back to Ireland, Nora started showing up a lot more in our mutual friend group and developed a crush on Barry.

But then I realized, Barry had made up a lie about why I didn’t go out with him the other night. No one knew about my alcoholism and relapse, Bary wanted to keep it that way.

“Oh,” was all I could say in response to Nora.

She flicked her red hair over her shoulders. “Are you going to his fight tonight?”

Immediately, I shook my head. “We’re divorced. Why would I?”

My face scrunched up at the way I sounded exactly like Barry had every time he said those exact words.

“So it is true then? I saw articles online about the divorce but you know you can’t believe what you read online,” Nora said with some sort of glint in her eye.

I motioned with my jaw over her shoulder. “I should get going. I’ve got some things I have to do.”

Nora's voice called from behind me as my feet sidestepped her, ready to end the conversation.

“Don’t worry, Y/N. I’ll be there tonight and I’ll give him your thoughts of good luck!”

The building was packed with bodies, back to back, as I squirmed my way through, giving apologies as I bumped a few shoulders here and there. Everyone in town was here tonight to give their support for the two fighters, no one wanted to miss this fight. Through an opening in the crowd, I stopped and caught my breath. The second I returned home from my run, I rushed to shower and get ready so I didn’t miss Barry’s fight. I quickly squeezed myself into a pair of tight leather pants, a low V-neck long sleeve that hugged my cleavage just right and slipped into my boots on the way out of the door a mere twenty minutes ago. I was so rushed that I hadn’t had a second to text Barry to let him know I changed my mind.

My eyes scanned the open space for him until they finally fell on a man walking in from a door in the back of the building, bag slung over his shoulder. He was in a conversation with his trainer so he didn’t see me at first. It wasn’t until his name fell from my lips that he looked towards me, his steps slowing down and lips parted in surprise.

“Hi,” I breathed.

I shifted, feeling self-conscious as Barry’s gaze drank in every inch of me, taking a few seconds longer on the exposed skin of the swell of my breast thanks to the low cut of my shirt.

“You came?”

Something inside me twitched at his words but I nodded. “Yeah, I changed my mind. Is that alright? If not, I can leave.”

I pointed behind me, ready to stick to my words, but Barry was quick to respond.

“No,” he said in a rushed tone. “I’m glad you’re here.”

My brow raised. “You are?”

Barry nodded before motioning for me to follow him to the row of chairs that surrounded the boxing ring and pointed to one that was in the middle of the front row. I raised my brow at the little sign that read reserved.

“I get a reserved seat, eh?” I let out a small giggle.

He shrugged. “Only the best for you.”

We stared at each other for what felt like minutes, neither of us saying a word because the surrounding air thickened while everything and everyone around us faded away. We were the only two in the room and with Barry’s burning gaze roaming every inch of me; I thought I would melt into a puddle right there.

“So,” I began, unsure what exactly to say.

“So,” he repeated.

I cracked my knuckles, a nervous habit, and with a soft groan, Barry’s one hand covered both of mine.

“I hate when you do that.”

The sheer warmth that spread through my veins when I felt his skin on mine caused a white light to flash in my eyes as memories of us came flooding back. Those same hands roamed every inch of my skin, his calloused fingers tracing the variety of beauty marks that littered my arm or the small scars that covered my knee thanks to a bike accident when I was younger.

“Sorry,” I muttered.

A quiet sigh fell from my lips when Barry pulled his hand away from mine and still in this weird tension bubble, I noticed a strand of his hair fall into his eyes and he cursed at it while running a hand through it.

“I should have cut it before the fight.”

“No,” I shook my head not thinking of my words before they came sputtering out. “I like it long like this.”

I hesitantly raised a hand and brushed his brown locks back as they fell into his face yet again. Barry didn’t make a move to push my hand away, only let me drag my fingers down the back of his neck and when the tips of my finger grazed his cheek, he sucked in a breath. My eyes jumped from his lips to his eyes before landing back on his lips; a silent way of asking something that I had been dying to know. Dying to feel, dying to taste.

The magnetic pull that appeared out of nowhere had been pulling us closer at a slow pace, neither of us wanting to rush whatever was about to happen. I wasn’t sure what exactly changed the dynamic between us. This was the longest we had gone without fighting. Maybe it was because, beneath our anger for each other, we had built up tension that needed to be released in a different way than yelling.

A more primal way.

“Barry!”

The surrounding bubble popped at the sound of his name and the both of us stepped away from each other, my hand dropping to my side.

Barry looked over his shoulder to his trainer to give him a nod then looked back at me. “I’ve got to go.”

I nodded, a red tint covering my cheeks at the realization of what I was about to do. “Sure.”

He turned on his feet and took a few steps before stopping to look back at me. “Wait for me afterward?”

My lips curled up into a bright smile. “Of course.”

With a quick wink, he was pushing his way through the crowd towards his trainer.

The energy was high and buzzing throughout the building as I stood there bouncing on my heels amid the dissipating crowd. The fight had ended with Barry getting the win; I knew he was ecstatic. I could see it in the way his eyes glinted with stars before leaving the ring. There was a crowd of people around him, congratulating him, but I made no move to go towards him. I let the others chat with him, knowing that he would come back to my place tonight. There was no need to push my way towards him. I could wait.

Plus, my mind was racing with what happened during the fight. I could get the image out of my head, no matter how hard I tried to downplay it.

First, before the fight began, I gaped at Barry’s bare chest and my tongue rolled over my lips slowly. The burning itch I felt between my legs was hot, and I had squeezed them to curb the desire. Barry had noticed how affected I was so he gave me a wink, which told me he knew exactly how I was feeling.

Throughout the fight, he would glance my way whenever he could but not much because he didn’t want to be distracted. I would cheer for every hit he landed and wince with every hit he received. It was the first time in a week since I was told of my parents' death that I felt as if everything was normal. Nothing was falling apart. My life was good, I was happy.

But what had me over-analyzing everything that happened after the fight. Once Barry was declared the winner, he rolled out of the ring to come stand a few inches in front of me. I sucked in a breath when he went to reach for me but froze when he realized what he was about to do. The heat of the moment had almost made him pull me in for a kiss, something he used to do after a fight.

I didn’t have the chance to ask him what he wanted to do because friends from the crowd had pulled Barry into their crowd to congratulate him. This is where we were now as I continued to stand in place, wondering if I should still wait for him.

It was almost a half hour post-fight and Barry had yet to retreat to the locker room to wash up and change. He wanted me to wait for him and I said I would but now; I thought that maybe it be best if I waited for him at home.

Just as I grabbed my things ready to leave, a high-pitched, over-happily voice, rang in my ears and my shoulders went rigid.

“Barry! You did so well tonight. I knew you would win!”

My gaze fell on Nora who was pulling away from a hug, Barry’s arm slinking away from her. They chatted but were too far for me to hear about what exactly.

“Fuck this,” I muttered, definitely not wanting to wait for him now.

I turned on my heels and made a few footsteps before my name echoed off the walls. Looking back, I saw Barry watching me with confusion clouding his eyes.

“You’re not leaving, are ya?” He asked over the somewhat loud, lingering crowd.

Seeing the disappointment on his face made my stomach drop, so I quickly shook my head. “No.”

“Good,” he smiled while waving me over finally.

I took the few strides that were all needed to close the distance between us and Nora, who kept rambling on about whatever piqued her interest. When I reached Barry, I stood to the left of him as gave me a warm smile and turned back to Nora.

“Y/N,” she smiled through gritted teeth. “Did Barry look amazing?”

I licked my lips, never taking my eyes off Barry. “Yeah, he did.”

Barry now licked his lips, burning his gaze into my own.

Whatever kind of moment that the two of us were having, Nora paid no mind to it and continue to talk. The entire time, Bary’s eyes were stuck to me like glue, to the skin of the tops of my breasts through my shirt. I didn’t think choosing this shirt would distract him as much as it had. It was as if he was remembering how I looked underneath the shirt.

Barry suddenly stiffened with Nora’s next words.

“There’s an after-party at the pub down the road. Why don’t you two come?

I looked at him and noticed he didn’t say a word. He didn’t have to. I knew exactly what he was thinking.

I relapsed, and trying to overcome alcoholism, in a pub with a crowd of hyped-up and rowdy Irishmen was not a good idea.

“It might be fun,” I suggested to Barry. “I could use a distraction.”

His eyes went dark as he grappled his bottom teeth between his lips. The look said it all; I can give you a distraction.

I swallowed a large lump in my throat while shifting to my feet to curb the burning desire in my core.

“We’re going to pass tonight, Nora. Thanks anyway,” Barry gave her a small smile before extending a hand past her.

I followed his hand and felt him close behind me as we walked toward the locker rooms. Barry’s warm breath fanned the back of my neck and I shivered at the feeling. When we reached the doorway to the locker rooms, Barry grasped my elbow.

“Did you have fun tonight?” He wondered.

I nodded with a smile. “I did. I’m glad I came. It helped me forget about everything for a while, thank you.”

Barry’s hand slide down my arm slowly before his fingers traced over the skin of my wrist, bringing our hands together. He then placed a few kisses on the inside of my palm and I sucked in a breath. The sexual tension between us was thick and we couldn’t deny it any longer. It had been building up for days now and if we didn’t do something about it soon, it would explode into something worse.

“Barry!” A voice called out. “You promised you would help tear down!”

Snapping away from our intense gaze, he looked over to the owner of the gym and nodded, a curse under his breath.

“Ya, give me a minute!” Barry called back before giving me his attention once more. “Will you be fine getting back home by yourself? I’ll probably be awhile and don’t want to have you wait around for me.”

I nodded. “Yeah.”

With another yell from the gym owner, Barry dropped my hand from his and began walking backward. “Wait up for me tonight?”

“For what?” I asked curiously.

Barry smirked. “Whatever you want, grá.”

[thefallennightmare]

Broken-six

*credit to whoever created the gif. found on google/Pinterest*

Pairings: Barry Keoghan x Reader

Warnings: angst, swearing, fluff, implied smut, mentions of alcoholism and death.

Summary: A failed marriage wasn't in the cards for Reader, she thought she found her happily ever after with Barry. While trying to overcome the heartbreak, a tragic event brings them back together temporarily. Will the devastating loss bring them back together or be what pushes them apart for good?

Authors Note: This story clearly isn't as popular as my others, but I still have a blast writing it.

The television played in the background, the noise falling on deaf ears because my mind was elsewhere, filled with thoughts of something else. 

Someone else. 

Barry had been gone for most of the morning and afternoon, needing to take care of some things on his end. He needed to stop by home to take Koda somewhere since Barry was going to be spending most of his free time with me. Before I even thought of the outcome of my words, they spewed from my mouth like vomit. 

“You could bring him here. I do miss him.” 

Barry tensed with hesitation. “I don’t think that’s a good idea. Don’t want to get his hopes up that we're back together.” 

At that point, I mentally smacked myself for even thinking that. 

He also wanted to head to the gym for a quick workout, not having much time to box lately. I couldn’t stop the smile that played on my lips when I remembered all the times I would show up to support him, be in his corner, for every single one of his fights before we got divorced. 

With an annoyed groan, I did my best to focus on whatever was on the television, not wanting to think about Barry any longer. It didn’t last long, however, because my phone buzzed next to me with his name popping up on the screen. 

How’s your day going?

My heart fluttered at his text but I tried not to think too much into it, Barry probably wanted to make sure that I wasn’t drunk. 

The thought did cross my mind a few times today but I knew that in order to have him out of my life, I had to keep up my end of our deal. As much as I still loved him, I couldn’t bear the thought of being around him dictating every part of my life or what I do. He lost that chance when we signed the divorce papers. 

“Just get through the next few days and I can have a much needed drink,” I muttered to myself before replying to Barry’s text. 

Good. Watching t.v. 

I didn’t have time to set my phone down before another text from him came through. 

Staying sober?

A tiny groan fell from my lips. 

Yes considering you threw out all of the alcohol in my parents house. 

Are we about to fight over text right now? 

“Don’t be a dick and we won’t,” I grumbled to myself. 

I don’t want to. I’m tired of fighting with you, Barry. 

The anger was festering inside of me and I knew that if we continued to talk, one of us would say something mean or hurtful; again. So with my phone now on silent, I set it on the table in front of me and decided to pass the time by eating lunch and it was when I stepped out the shower, wrapping a towel around me, that I finally decided to check my phone. 

Two unread messages from Barry. The first one came in right as I had set my phone down and the second one was from only a couple minutes ago.

I hate fighting with you, Y/N. I always have. I’m only checking in because I care about you, whether you want to believe it or not. 

My heart skipped a beat as I read the message a few more times then when I read the second one, it damn near bursted out of my chest. 

I’m about to head to the gym to spar for a bit. Maybe afterwards we can meet for lunch? Like old times?

I typed a response before I could even second guess my decision. 

You know I’d never turn that down. 

My erratic heart didn't calm as I rushed to get myself ready. 

Music was blasting in the small gym as I walked up, nerves wrecking my entire body so I wrung my hands together in hopes to hide it. While I was sitting at home waiting for him, I thought it would be better if I met Barry here before we head to lunch. My eyes scanned around the room to find Barry but it wasn’t until I heard his laugh coming from the opened garage door that led outside. 

Hearing that laugh breathed life into the butterflies that laid dormant in my stomach for the last year. 

As I walked outside, I saw Barry sparring with one of his trainers, the sun beating down on his bare back. The familiar itch burned between my legs while I carefully watched each and every muscle tense as Barry laid punch after punch to the trainer's pads. His breathing was fast and short, almost sounding like how we used to lay together between the sheets. 

The two stopped momentarily when his trainer noticed I had walked up and he nodded towards me. 

“Your wife is here.” 

Barry quickly turned on his feet, a small smile pulling at his lips. I was so engrossed in the way he looked that I didn’t catch what his trainer called me. But if Barry did, he made no effort to correct him. 

“What are you doing here?” He asked while taking off his boxing gloves and set them to the ground. 

I shrugged. “I thought it would be alright if I met you here. If not, I can leave.” 

Barry swiftly shook his head, stopping me as I began to walk away. “No, it’s alright. Give me a few more minutes then we can head out.” 

With a nod, I stepped to the side as he went back to sparring, the previous feeling returning in my veins. Every inch of his skin glinted underneath the sunlight and the metaphoric drool spilled between my lips. 

“Are ya staring?” Barry called over his shoulder, not even looking at me. 

I cleared my throat and adjusted my stance to a straighter position. “No.” 

He nodded a quick goodbye to the trainer before he gave me his full attention once more. 

“You’ve always been a terrible liar,” Barry gave me a cheeky smile. 

My cheeks burned with embarrassment so I crossed my arms over my chest, ready to fastley change the subject. 

“When’s your fight?”  

He took a large gulp of his water. “Saturday.” 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” I shook my head slightly dumbfounded. “I used to come to every one of your fights.” 

Barry would always tell me when he had a fight, excitement clear on his face. Besides acting, boxing was another passion of his. 

There was stiff hesitation from him. “When we were married, I didn’t think you’d want to come to this one.” 

All I could do was look at my feet while I shifted on them, the embarrassment scorching over my skin. Every time I thought that we were getting close again, one of us brought up the fact that we were not together anymore. It made the sting in my heart hurt that much more because unlike Barry, I never forgot about him or what we went through together. 

“Hey,” Barry’s soft voice and gentle touch on my hand as he squeezed it. “Ya alright?” 

My eyes darted from his hand in mind, the all too familiar feeling of his skin on mine made my body shiver with excitement; heart skipping a few beats. 

Our eyes now locked and I nodded. “Should we head to lunch?” 

He could see in the way I then shifted my gaze back to my feet that something was still bothering me but Barry didn’t want to press, worried that I would cause a scene in front of everyone here. 

“Course,” he smiled, leading me out of the gym.

[thefallennightmare]

Broken-Three

Pairings: Barry Keoghan x Reader

Warnings: angst, swearing, fluff, implied smut, mentions of alcoholism and death.

Summary: A failed marriage wasn't in the cards for Reader, she thought she found her happily ever after with Barry. While trying to overcome the heartbreak, a tragic event brings them back together temporarily. Will the devastating loss bring them back together or be what pushes them apart for good?

Authors Note: nothing to add!

The house I had grown up in that used to be filled with so much love and warmth now felt cold and empty. It wasn’t in my plans that once I finished packing up my apartment back in the states that I would have to jump across the ocean to now possibly pack up my parents house. 

I arrived back in my hometown late last night and decided to stay at a hotel once I arrived, not having the energy to walk through the home till after a full night's rest. Not only did I have to get my parents' affairs in order, I also had to plan their funeral. It wasn’t an easy task and I wished that I wasn’t alone in this. Being an only child, everything fell on my shoulders. 

The morning had been filled with various amounts of my parents' friends coming by to offer their condolences while dropping off a large casserole dish of some type of meal. Now the sun had begun to set, and I sat at the kitchen table with a large envelope in front of me that I was dreading to open; my parents will.

We never had a close relationship, my parents and I. I left for college right at eighteen and only came back home a few years later to tell them that I met someone while out in Los Angeles and was engaged. They were happy for me and promised to help with whatever I needed for the wedding; and they did. While I was living my own life, so were they, but we still managed to talk every couple of days. 

It was only until my divorce that we got really close. My parents allowed me to stay here for the first couple months to get on my feet before I flew back to the states to settle my own things there. 

My feet began to pace around the kitchen in hopes that I could gain the courage to open that envelope. I didn’t know what to expect to read, not knowing what my parents had. Tears pricked in the corners of my eyes, knowing that if I did open that envelope, it would become all too real.

I scanned over the bar cart in the corner of the kitchen, a wide variety of alcohol staring back at me, almost tempting me to have a taste; just a small taste. 

My sobriety had been on the right track for the last couple of years but the last year had been the hardest, dealing with the divorce and now the death of my parents. I was standing on the edge, ready to jump. The only person that was able to keep me from falling stopped being that person when he signed the papers.

“Fuck it,” I shrugged before snatching the bottle of vodka. 

My lips wrapped around it, downing it in seconds. The taste slightly burned my throat but nothing that I wasn’t used to. I tossed the empty bottle onto the ground, crashing to the ground with a loud echo, and reached for another bottle, it being gone just as quick. 

It wasn’t supposed to be like this. My parents had so much left to live for; retirement, having grandkids, and dying at old age. Not in the car by someone who couldn’t look away from their phone. 

“It’s not fair,” I slurred while crashing onto the couch. 

Another large swig finished off the bottle and it rolled out of my hand, clanking to the carpet below. I ran a very tired hand over my face and contemplated having another drink or head to bed to prepare for the next few days, alone. 

The viewing then the funeral. 

Of course there would be other members of my family and friends there but they’re not the ones that I wanted; needed. He was currently on the other side of the world in Los Angeles and there wasn’t a doubt in my mind that he would leave what he was doing to come here for me. 

Barry was over me and I needed to get over him. 

Right, like that’ll happen. 

My eyes burned a hole into my phone in my lap, knowing that drunk me didn’t care what I was about to do, however, in the morning, sober me would regret it. 

I cnt beleaf u lft me. I nED U. the died. Mis u looovee uuuu.

The alcohol consumed me faster than I thought it would, eyes falling heavy, and I was asleep before I could read the new text that buzzed my phone. 

There was a soft tune playing throughout the small funeral home as I stood broken, frozen, as people walked past me one at a time, offering me their condolences. It fell on deaf ears, the hangover blocking out the noise. It had been so long that I had to deal with one that I had to bite my tongue whenever my head would pound on the inside. 

Thankfully, no one could tell that not only was I dealing with a hangover, they couldn’t tell that I had something different in my water bottle. Whatever I needed to get through the next few days. 

“Y/N, sweetheart. Some of the guests are wondering if there are any bottles of water left?” 

My tired eyes looked up from the ground and noticed my moms aunt Lori. 

“Uh,” I looked around the room we were in. “I think so. Let me go check.” 

I excused myself and out into the hallway of the funeral home, hoping to find the person that was helping set this up. There was a large group of people crowding the hallway. My parents death brought out a lot of old friends, but my gaze fell on one person that stood out amongst all of them. 

A soft gasp fell from my lips when his eyes bore into me and he wore a sorrowful smile on his face. I felt the breath get knocked out of me and couldn’t stop the stumble over my own feet as I tried to steady myself. 

“Hi,” he breathed. 

I had to blink a few times to make sure he was actually standing in front of me. 

“Barry, wha-what are you doing here?” I asked, confused. 

It was his turn to be confused. “Your parents died. I had to make sure you’re alright.” 

“I’m fine,” I gave him a reassuring nod. 

“Right,” Barry scoffed. “Then what was with that text last night?” 

My cheeks burned red with embarrassment. When I woke up this morning, I remembered the text I sent him last night and with the wave of nausea from the hangover, I hadn’t had the chance to see Barry’s text in response. 

“It’s been a very long week and I’ve been exhausted. I must have sent it while I was falling asleep or something,” I lied. 

“What was it this time? Wine? Whiskey?” Barry questioned with his arms crossed. 

I shook my head, not wanting to have this conversation with him. Especially here and now. 

“If I would have known that all it would have taken for you to text me back was to get drunk, I would have done it a long time ago,” I muttered. 

Barry looked at me with disapproval; an all too familiar sight when I would fall off the cliff. His hazel eyes bored down at me and as I looked at him closer, I could see that there was a small amount of stubble grazing his chin. 

I had always loved the way he looked with hair covering his soft features. 

He ran a hand over his chin. “We got divorced, Y/N. Why would I text you back?” 

“Then why are you here?”

“For you,” he began. 

“I don’t need you, Barry!” I yelled. “You said it yourself, we’re divorced! 

After gaining the attention of others around us, Barry gently grabbed my elbow and pulled me towards a quiet corner. 

“Why can’t you just accept help when someone is giving it to you?” Barry questioned. 

“I’m doing fine. I don’t need your help anymore. I’ve been taking care of myself the last year and definitely can get by without you.” 

His nostrils flared slightly and with our new closeness, I knew exactly what he smelled. 

“Vodka? In your water bottle? Still doing that trick?” 

“Fuck you,” I seethed. “I don’t need this. I have to go bury my parents.” 

I ripped my arm out of his grasp and turned my back to him, hoping that it was the last time I would see him.

[thefallennightmare]

Broken-Two

Pairings: Barry Keoghan x Reader

Warnings: angst, swearing, fluff, implied smut

Summary: A failed marriage wasn't in the cards for Reader, she thought she found her happily ever after with Barry. While trying to overcome the heartbreak, a tragic event brings them back together temporarily. Will the devastating loss bring them back together or be what pushes them apart for good?

Authors Note: Nothing too big to add here. Same as always; hope you like it!

Ten and a half months later

I set down the last box by the front door before turning on my heels, eyes gazing around the now empty apartment. All of the memories that were shared here almost seemed non-existent, faded away when that pen touched those papers. Everything I fought so hard for vanished in front of me. 

The last few months had dragged on in a blur as I spent most of it held up in the bedroom down the hall. After Barry and I signed the divorce papers, I returned back to our once shared apartment in New York, the only thing I got in the divorce. At first it bothered me but I decided after much self pity that I would sell it and start over; fresh. 

Which was what I was doing right this moment. It took a couple of months but my apartment had sold and I was packing up the last few things before trekking to my new home; still in New York but it was a small ranch in the suburbs. I was ready to leave the city life behind. 

All of my things were at the new house, all but the one box by the front door that was labeled Barry. 

I had found some of his things while packing and after tossing the thought of burning them around for a while, I decided to pack them away until I knew what to do with them. It was that time but yet still didn’t know what to do with it. 

We hadn’t talked in almost a year, and he had done his best to stay off of social media, something he was always good with even when we were together, so I had no idea what he had been up to or who he had been with. 

Not that it mattered anymore, we weren’t together. 

The box had been in that spot for months, me clicking on his name in my phone to send him a message, wondering where I should send it or if he even wanted it. Everytime I clicked open a new message to him, nerves took over which caused me to click off my phone, forgetting it all together. 

It didn’t help that after all this time, I still couldn’t change the background of my phone. It was a picture I had taken of Barry on one of our many morning walks together. It was a bit chilly that morning, he was wearing his hood to cover him but the coldness didn;t bother him, he had the biggest smile on his face. 

It was one of my favorite pictures of him. 

“You’ve got to move on. He’s not coming back,” I grumbled to myself. 

Phone weighing heavy in my hand, I knew that I couldn’t put it off any longer. I needed to know where to send his things or if in fact he did not want them anymore. Letting out a deep breath, I let my fingers type before I could second guess myself once more. 

Hey, it’s me. Y/N. Not sure if you deleted my number or something. But I was cleaning out the apartment since I sold it and found some of your things. Clothes, shoes, and a few books. Let me know where to send it and I can overnight it. Or I could donate it if you don’t want it. Talk soon. 

“Oh god, that was terrible,” I cringed to myself when I read back the message. 

There wasn't an ounce of hope that Barry would respond, I guessed that he had been busy since the divorce. His acting career was starting to take off, something that I knew he was proud of. He would always talk about it when we would lay together tangled in the bedsheets. 

All I need is that one big role that will get my name out there.

A smile pulled at my lips when I remembered how sweet his words sounded with his Irish accent.

Barry and I had married young, both of us thinking we were in love and had big plans for our futures together. But as his career began to grow, I started to feel left behind, almost forgotten. We lived together in Ireland so when he needed to head to the states to film, oftentimes I would stay behind to work. We didn’t have much money then so we could never afford to have me take off. There were times I was able to fly out to see him or he would fly back home for the weekend but that was a rare occurrence. 

Which is why we got a divorce. 

Barry claimed that he didn’t have time to make a marriage work, and said that I deserved someone who could give me their full love and attention. He was starting to land these big roles he had always talked about, he didn’t need someone to get in the way of that. 

I believed him at first; until pictures of him and some women surfaced all over the internet. 

A sigh echoed through the now empty space as I tossed on my jacket and purse, ready to leave the box where it was when my phone went off. 

It was Barry’s text tone. 

My heart hammered hard in my chest as I quickly dug my phone out of my purse. 

I still have your number, don’t worry. I don’t need any of the things I left at the apartment, everything I need is here. 

I went to reply but stopped as another text came through. 

You sold the apartment? Where are you headed now?

I couldn’t help the warmth I felt spread through me, knowing that he was a tad bit interested in my life. 

I’m renting this place in the burbs. I didn’t want to be tied down to a place since I plan to travel for a while. 

Only a few seconds passed before Barry replied. 

You always talked about wanting to travel, good for you. 

I gnawed on my bottom lip, weighing the option of trying to keep the conversation going or to end it. This was the first solid conversation we had in almost a year, even if it was through texts. I had decided to leave it up to Barry.

Thanks. So I’ll just donate your old things then?

I knew the conversation had ceased when all he sent back was a thumbs up emoji so with a disappointed sigh, I lifted the box into my arms and gave one last look around before letting the door shut slowly behind me. 

Ringing from my back pocket caused me to stop halfway down the hallway. 

“Hey mom, can I call you from the car? I’m lugging the last few of my things from the apartment and it’s kind of hard to talk-.” 

“Hi, is this Y/N Keoghan?” 

I raised a brow at the unfamiliar voice coming through the phone. “Uh, yes to the first name but I go by my maiden's name now. Y/L/N. Who are you and why do you have my mom's phone?” 

“This is the Dublin police department. We’re calling about your parents.” 

Blood ran cold as I froze in place. “Are they alright?” 

“I’m sorry Ms. L/N. But your parents were in a terrible car accident the night before. They’re dead.” 

The next words that the office had spoken went unheard as my phone dropped to the hard ground, followed by my body that was wrecked with loud, broken sobs.

[vroomvroommuppett]

93) "It's okay, honey, you can pull my hair as hard as you want while I'm between your legs." with Oli & Barry x yn

prompt week

buy me a coffee!

ao3 link

NOTE: if you don’t like a pairing like this, skip it

#93 from the smut list

you, barry, and oliver had just gotten married and they surprised you with a trip to a private island in the bahamas for your honeymoon. the three of you can thank gavin and lia mchugh for setting you three up. long story short, you and oliver were already together, and you were already on a “9-1-1” spinoff as a fbi agent, and filmed on the same set as the mother show. gavin, who plays christopher, found out the two of you were fans of barry, so he called his sister, lia, who plays sprite in “eternals” to fly barry out to meet you and oliver. she agreed, as barry wouldn't stop talking about you and oliver. a few months later, you added barry into your relationship, he got a role on your show, and now you’re mrs stark-keoghan.

the first night you three were in your house in the bahamas, it was the sweetest sex ever. then after you mentioned wanting a baby, all the pleasantries went out the door.

“bar, look at our pretty wife, all laid out for us. isn’t she just begging to be filled?” “she really is. do you want us to fill you up and make you a mommy, baby?”

“yes. please. i want you both to make me a mommy, and i want to make you two daddies”

they had set you up so your back was supported by pillows, and barry was sucking and leaving marks on your boobs, while oliver was kissing your thighs. once he got to your pussy, he immediately started eating you out like a starved man. you had one hand in barry’s hair and one pulling on oliver’s hair to get him even closer. he stopped for a second and said

"it's okay, honey, you can pull my hair as hard as you want while i’m between your legs."

it didn't take long for the knot in your stomach to burst. barry kept sucking your boobs and oliver helped you through your third orgasm. he had also pinned your legs down. once you came down both detached and kissed each other tasting you. then they both kissed you.

the rest of the night consisted of them switching being in you, and that was actually how the whole week was.

and when you three revealed that you were pregnant? well gavin and lia were the smuggest because they got you three together and insisted you name the baby after them.

[vroomvroommuppett]

I posted 3,486 times in 2022

985 posts created (28%)

2,501 posts reblogged (72%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@jonathansonlysweetheart

@firetruckstuckley

@redheadspark

@a-lumos-in-the-nox

@stranger-nightmare

I tagged 1,814 of my posts in 2022

Only 48% of my posts had no tags

#andrew garfield - 559 posts

#barry keoghan - 465 posts

#ftrmrs barry keoghan!! - 219 posts

#ally!! - 213 posts

#aly!! - 173 posts

#charlie heatons whxre!! - 155 posts

#joe keery - 148 posts

#andrew x barry x yn - 130 posts

#social media - 122 posts

#andrew garfield social media - 120 posts

Longest Tag: 75 characters

#and they’re all masterlists i haven’t gotten around to posting or finishing

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Request 1: pregnancy prompt 7 with Peter

98 notes - Posted June 29, 2022

#4

SMUT REQUEST!!!!!!!!!

107 notes - Posted May 9, 2022

#3

What about a cute Druig getting baby fever?!?!?

🥺my heart

he’d see you play with the little kids in the village and something just bursts inside him. something primal.

he would slowly drop hints verbally

“you’d make such a great mommy” “you’re so good with the kids”

and hints non verbally by showing you baby clothes and cooing at babies

when you wouldn’t catch onto his hints, one night he tells you that he wants to make you a mommy and the whole night is spent making love

as you both were eternals, there was a chance you couldn’t get pregnant, but you did

with triplets

111 notes - Posted August 10, 2022

#2

Daddy?! Sir?!

262 notes - Posted October 16, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

garcia: if you got arrested, what would be the charges?

morgan: theft

reid: disturbing of the peace

hotch: aggravated assault

jj: arson

emily: all of the above. in that order, probably

737 notes - Posted September 16, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[vroomvroommuppett]

Oli x Yn x B honeymoon thoughts?

Do with that what you will

heheheheheheh-

ok so

they surprised you with a trip for your honeymoon to bora bora, and it was the place where you have your own house on the water. growing up you couldn’t afford to go on trips and so when you arrived to the house, you just started crying. when oli and barry asked what’s wrong you told them and they hugged you and simply said “we’ll take you around the world, ok?” you just nodded.

to announce your wedding, they’d post these pictures and caption it “introducing mrs stark-keoghan @/ynstarkeoghan” and the internet would blow up since they didnt know you were even a thing

now to the sexy times

while the sex had been amazing before, sex while being married was different. the first night being married, it was slow and sensual with “daddy” and “mommy” thrown in there. after the first night, the breeding kinks came out. now you knew about their breeding kinks beforehand, but being married just amplified them.

“you’re going to look so beautiful with our baby in you” “look at you taking us so well” “we can’t wait to see you all round with our baby” “we can’t wait to see these fill up with milk” “we can’t wait to see you be an amazing mommy”

OH AND THE ACCENTS

them saying something in their accent could make you cum immediately, and that’s one of their proudest moments.

you three would barely leave the bed and would barely answer the phone and when you got back, the casts teased you relentlessly.

only for two lines to show up a month later on 6 tests

don’t even get me started on pregnancy sex

feel free to add on

[thefallennightmare]

Broken-one

Parings: Barry Keoghan x Reader

Warnings: smut, swearing, angst, fluff. all the good stuff

Summary: A failed marriage wasn't in the cards for Reader, she thought she found her happily ever after with Barry. While trying to overcome the heartbreak, a tragic event brings them back together temporarily. Will the devastating loss bring them back together or be what pushes them apart for good?

Author's Note: I'M BACK BITCHES! TBH, I've been torn about whether to do a Barry Keoghan or Andy Barber fic that deals with this story line so I kind of have something for both written but unsure if I should do both. Let me know! I'm hoping to get updates out more often than I used to but no promises

The clock ticked away, the soft noise bouncing around the small office, as I stared at the man that sat on the other end of the long table. The shell of the man that I once knew all those months ago refused to meet my broken gaze. He knew that if he did, this meeting would maybe have a different outcome. 

Maybe. 

I didn’t want to be here, more so than him, but it was what he wanted. I was willing to put in the extra time and work, not wanting to waste the last five years. 

I can’t give ya what you want, love. I’m not home much anymore. It’s not fair. 

His words slammed around in my head which caused a quiet sniffle to sound in the room over the ticking of the clock but I did my best to mask it by clearing my throat, hoping he would ignore it; like he ignored many other things. 

“Ya alright?” 

My gaze lifted from my lap to the green eyes across the table and did my best to nod. 

“Yeah, just fighting off a cold,” I lied. 

If he saw past the lie, like he used to be able to, he made no mention of it. 

Lips parted to speak but no words fell because the door to the office opened, two bodies walking in. The once quiet room was filled with the hustle and bustle of bodies in the hallway, their conversations slipping inside before the door closed. 

“Sorry it took so long but I think the papers should be one hundred percent finalized this time,” Jake, his lawyer, said while sitting next to him. “How are you doing, Barry?” 

Barry nodded. “Alright.” 

I smiled sweetly to the woman who sat next to me, herself returning a smile. Only this one was a sorrowful smile, one that only meant one thing. 

“Oh no.” I muttered. 

“So,” Jake cleared his throat and pulled out some papers from his briefcase. “Lauren has a copy for you Y/N. If you want to look over everything to make sure there’s no mistakes this time.” 

The annoyed tone didn’t go unnoticed by me and I scoffed. 

“It’s not my fault.” 

“Y/N, why don’t we look it over and see if we can finally come to an agreement?” Laura suggested. 

With a reluctant nod, voices seized while both Barry and I looked over our own packets and everything was going fine until I got to the last two bullets of how our shared belongings would be divided. 

Mr. Keoghan will keep custody of Koda. 

Barry was already watching me with his own sorrowful expression, him biting at the inside of his cheeks. 

I merely shrugged, trying to keep my broken heart together. 

“You bought him, it’s only fair you keep him.” 

The next bullet point, however, is what really dug the knife deeper into my heart. 

Mr. Keoghan will keep the home in Ireland while Mrs. Keoghan, soon to be Miss. Y/L/N, will keep the penthouse in New York City.

“He gets to keep the dog AND the house?” I exasperated. 

The home that we built together, from the ground up. It held so many memories; good for the first few years and bad the last year. I thought he would at least let me have something good. I barely spent any time in New York anymore, we only stayed there when he was filming in the States, so it didn’t make sense for either of us to keep it. 

“Do we have an agreement?” Jake questioned. 

When Barry or I didn’t say anything, Jake handed us both pens, clearly ready to get this meeting over with. It had been dragged on for months, us never finding the perfect time to sit down and sign away our marriage. Barry had been busy filming and this was his only day off for the next two weeks. 

We can't keep putting this off, Y/N. It’s over. 

I blinked away tears at his old words  and with shaky fingers, I grasped the pen in my hand. Time felt frozen as my eyes burned a hole into the line where my signature was supposed to go. In a matter of seconds, our marriage would no longer exist, erased in the past. The vows we shared that day meant nothing as I gave Barry a teary look. 

“It didn’t have to come to this.” 

He pinched his eyes shut. “Y/N, don’t-.” 

I shook my head. “I was willing to work on everything, but you wanted to give it all up. Do you even love me anymore?” 

My sobs echoed throughout the room. 

Barry blinked, unsure how to answer my cries. 

I knew the answer, though. The rumors online told me everything. 

“Was she worth it?” 

Barry was silent, knuckles turning white from how hard he was gripping the pen. 

Without a second thought, I signed away our love on both copies, not bothering to look back at the man that I had given literally everything too.