#bananaman rambles about childcare again

[bananonbinary]

seriously maybe its just my own trauma but actually genuinely FUCK “discipline.” even if ur talking “discipline, not punishment.” FUCK “tough love” and “building character” and “hard on you because i’m worried” and any other excuse parents use to be dicks to vulnerable children. im not even just talking about spanking, but taking away dinner, or a comfort item, or cutting them off from friends, or any other way to resolve the problem that isnt centered around “let’s talk/think about why this was a problem and how to do better next time, and why we acted this way this time” is a fucking bad way to treat another human being.

i have never in my life encountered a situation that would be improved by making a child feel like shit because it would “make them a better person.” it won’t. it’ll make them not do the thing again maybe, but only out of fear, not because they have a better understanding. and once that fear is taken away, ie, once they move out into the world, they have no basis at all for how to be a functional human. you have failed them as a parent.

also children aren’t fucking dogs??? (not that this shit works on dogs anyway lmao) you can’t “train” them out of “problem behaviours,” you can only abuse them into being people pleasers.