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medra-gonbites · 4 months ago

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The Contemplations and Conclusions of Minsc of Rashemen

A steam of consciousness wherein Minsc processes his arrival in the gang and reflects on his new (and old) companions and mission.

SFW - Stream of consciousness, Comedy

Word Count: 2173

Minsc let his eyes scurry around the room. They landed on Jaheira’s corner, next to his. The incense sticks were still fuming passively, fogging the area slightly with the musky scent of cedar.

“I am glad that Jaheira found us again. To think Minsc of Rashemen fell for the trick of a doppelganger! It should have been clear as soon as he saw none of Jaheira’s druidic wisdom behind the traitor’s eyes. Also the very much less wrinkles on the face… Minsc feels ashamed for having failed his Wychlaran!”

His furrowed brow scanned the rest of the room, before turning upside down.

“But, it is a relief that Jaheira met such a group of courageous companions too!”

Minsc pondered a moment. He had not been in their company for so long. In truth he did not know them at all yet, but he had already noticed a lot of things around camp, enough, he thought, to appreciate their respective characters.

Read the rest on AO3 or below the cut!

I have been writing relatively dark stuff recently and while it has been cathartic I wanted to try my hand at something a little bit happier!

Minsc is a hilarious and a very wise orator. He is extremely funny, and although he appears dumb because he uses the wrong words sometimes and fails to understand some nuances, his sentences all make perfect sense and his emotional intelligence is top notch, both when it comes to himself and when it comes to others.

I got inspired to do a stream of consciousness with Minsc (and Boo as a ghost conversationalist in a way), where he processes his arrival in the gang and reflects on his new (and old) companions.

image source: my screenshot

Minsc was sitting on the floor of the Elfsong Tavern, mindlessly tapping a rhythm on the stretched skin of the bongos pressed under his arm. After the madness of the last days the ranger was quite relieved to find himself alone; well, safe for Boo, tucked away in the collar of his shirt, napping against his collarbone.

His new companions knew of his need for respite and had gotten themselves busy today with errands and quests around the city. Shadowheart, Lae’zel, Gale and Astarion had gone to a mansion by the Upper City gate, investigating the paranormal activities reported there. Wyll, Karlach, Halsin and their leader Tav had gone to check a lead on the kidnapping of a little girl, suspecting the mischief of a hag. Jaheira had gone home to visit her children and tighten some loose ends with them, primarily to keep them safe and out of the city.

Minsc had remained at the Tavern, to reflect on his new entourage, his new mission and his new purpose. He was playing his bongo as he gathered his thoughts. The information was swirling in his head together with the illithid parasite. It was difficult to clear his mind, but he was not sure if this restlessness was caused by the intruder in his brain or simply the overload of news he had to compose with.

A sudden fatigue overtook him. He sighed deeply, resting his hand on the drums, halting the music. He felt Boo stirring by his neck. The rodent emerged with a squeal and climbed onto Minsc's shoulder.

“Ah Boo! I trust you had a good nap? Minsc is still very confused with everything that happened to us as of late. Care to join my contemplations. Maybe you can help make sense of all this?”

The small creature squeaked in response.

“Yes, it is a lot! Minsc cannot believe Minsc was the Stone Lord all along. If only somebody had told him.” Boo peeped in contestation, “You are right my friend; you did tell. Excuse Minsc for not listening.”

Minsc let his eyes scurry around the room. They landed on Jaheira’s corner, next to his. The incense sticks were still fuming passively, fogging the area slightly with the musky scent of cedar.

His furrowed brow scanned the rest of the room, before turning upside down.

“But, it is a relief that Jaheira met such a group of courageous companions too!”

His gaze went to Shadowheart’s bed, across from him. The sheets were neatly folded and the clothes on the duvet laid there, unwrinkled.

“What do you think of Shadowheart, Boo?”

The hamster creaked.

“I too wonder why her eyebrows are not the same colour as her hair… But nevermind her hairy condition, she seems a trustworthy cleric.” Boo scritched, “Ex-sharran, if I heard right.” Minsc corrected him, “I hope she takes care of Minsc when Minsc is injured. Kiss the booboos better”.

The rodent, displeased with the statement, nipped the shoulder of a blushing Minsc.

“Ouch! Not you, Boo!” Boo, squeaked in protestation, “No, no! Minsc wishes not to romance. Shadowheart is a fine lady, with very pretty eyes, but Minsc is betrothed to justice and the kicking of butts!”

Passing Shadowheart bed, Minsc caught sight of Wyll’s bunk. One of his rapier stood against the foot of the bed and his lounging outfit was emerging from under a pillow, shredded in place.

“The Blade of Frontiers! Brave man that Wyll, isn’t he Boo?” Boo gritted his teeth together in response, “That is true. I do not know why the flare for the theatrics and the naming. But people did call Minsc the Stone Lord for years it seems, so who is he to judge? I hope that Wyll can escape his patron’s wicked paperwork soon! Do you think his forehead would go back to normal?”

Minsc reached out to his own brow, touching the skin at the edge of his skull. As usual, it was smooth and hairless, keeping his head light and his vision unobstructed. Boosquawked at Minsc.

“Oh no, not at all! Minsc finds him dashing with the horns! Like a powerful ram, ready to charge into battle! But Minsc is concerned: It looks heavy on the boy’s head. Also a problem if he is ever in need of a hat… Maybe it is a problem Karlach has also.”

Minsc thought of the fiery tiefling barbarian for a moment and at the glowing red fire that swole in her chest when she felt anger rise within her.

“Fierce berserker, like us Boo! Karlach is one of the warmest warriors I have ever met and blessed with the biggest heart of them all.” Faced with his companions’ squeaking noise, Minsc clarifies, “Yes, Minsc knows she does not have a heart: I am doing a figure of the poetics: a superbole if you will. Let us hope that she finds a cure before it is all said and done. If she ever needs a heart, Minsc would gladly donate his”.

The giant lifted a hand and placed it to the right side of his chest. Boo raised his head towards the ranger, wiggling his nose at him.

“But you gave your liver to your dying cousin! Are you sure I cannot?” The nose wiggled once more, “Hm… Confusing how some organs you can give and some you cannot; Medicine is a strange science. Perhaps Gale could explain.”

Minsc winces at the idea, before waving it off dismissively. Last time he had attempted to have a conversation with the mage, he had found himself feeling simple and small, and neither feeling was representative of what Minsc was in reality.

“On second thoughts, Minsc is not keen on receiving another lecture. Do you know what he called Minsc yesterday, Boo?” The hamster let out an inquisitive screech, “A coverslut! Lies! Nobody is more virtuous than Minsc!” Boo squawked a reply, “Why, yes, Minsc was wearing a stained undershirt, but it’s no excuse to insult!”

Boo squealed louder, Minsc opened his eyes wide as if struck by an epiphany.

“Aaaah! Is that so! Well, I should apologize then… I made peace with the idea that the wizard and Minsc will always struggle to understand each other. Although his sadness is easy to get. He misses his goddess very much and cannot find his value without her. I too was once lost without Jaheira… Maybe we can convince one of your brothers to befriend Gale, so that he can find his value and trust in the eyes of a furry friend like Minsc did?”

Boo yipped in disagreement and Minsc raised a hand before him.

“Yes, he does already have a cat but… Alright, alright! I did not know you were in such quarrels with your family… The intricacies of hamster politics is lost on Minsc. But it reminds me of Lae’zel’s struggle with her people.” Boo let out a panicked screech, “Yes I compare; you two are more similar than you think! She is fierce, and bloodthirsty and eager for battle just like Boo is! Besides, she promised she would not eat you…”

Minsc hesitated a moment, wanting to ask something to his rodent companion but not daring to. He finally built up the courage to do so and with a cautionary tone he began.

“Say… Lae’zel also told that Boo did not look like any other giant space hamster she had seen and that… Maybe!.. You might be just a regular hamster. Is that true?”

Outraged by the question, Boo bit hard into the flesh of Minsc's neck.

��Aïyaaah!” the ranger screamed, bringing a hand to the bite to rub the pain away, “You have spent too much time with Astarion! I know you enjoy his panache, but Minsc can do without the teeth.”

As he massaged the area of the bite, Minsc was reminded of the puncture holes on the side of the vampire’s neck and of the scars he had seen on the vampire’s back when the latter had changed into his armor that very morning.

“To think of the horrors that he must have seen and borne. But he still smiles and laughs. Mostly when he is covered in bits and innards, but still. Minsc has respect for Astarion. Let’s pray he will make the right choice when he must… But I do not doubt that he will.”

Boo walked down Minsc's arm to lay in his open palm.

“Indeed my friend! I cannot wait to go kick this Cazador’s vampire butt!”

The Rachemi looks at his familiar with tenderness. Like most rangers, Minsc had a privileged relationship with his familiar, that went beyond those of a pet and his master. Boo was his friend, his mentor, his leader. He felt the same appreciation toward Tav, the alpha of this pack.

“Ah Boo! I think we can both agree that Tav is as mighty as their name is stupid! What great mind to be able to command fine heroes such as all of us.” Boo licked his paw which he wiped on his face, “Yes, that is true; they are a bit weird sometimes. Like when they stare in the void for hours. Or drop their gear on the floor. Or run in circles around camp - like the dog, hum.. Scratch?- to talk to everyone. That is odd. But aren’t we all?”

Minsc looked around him, to the cozy floor and comfortable bedding surrounding him.

“They sure do know how to talk their way into a soft bed. Not to forget the sting of their sword and the fly of their fist.”

What a heart-warming group of adventurers, Minsc thought. None braver, no one tougher, no one stronger than them. The ill-matched but mighty bunch they formed together in camaraderie and…

Boo let out a shrill shriek pulling Minsc back to reality.

“Who?” He asked, a puzzled expression bending the purple sphere on his forehead and eye.

Boo creaked.

“Halsin? Minsc does not recall anyone by this n…” Minsc trailed off, catching a glimpse of Halsin’s gear next to Jaheira’s, “Ah yes! The feeble elf who smells of mud.”

The ranger tried to shake the bitterness in his tone under the critical eye of Boo.

“Yes, well he is a druid. Of that we already have one, so that makes him rhododendron.” Boo’s glare was intense and Minsc felt urged to continue in a more praising manner, “But he seems like a gentle soul, and has been caring for the owlbear cub very well.”

Looking riveted at his hamster companion, Minsc could not help but feel hints of doubt and powerlessness tugged in his stomach. With fear in his eyes the gentle giant brought his hand to his face to level the creature with his eyes, and starring in the little black beads on the rodent’s face he inquired:

“Will you leave me for him, Boo?”

Boo jumped on Minsc's nose and climbed up to settle on top of his head. He squeaked triumphantly.

“Good! For a moment, Minsc was afraid you had found a stronger nature lover to adventure with!”

Boo flattened against the curve of Minsc’s skull. Laying on the smooth dome, the animal quickly dozed off into slumber. Reassured and relaxing, Minsc resumed his percussion on the drum. He found it easier to clear his head now, after organizing and voicing his thoughts.

The man was grateful to be allowed such times for introspection and meditation. It did him good to be able to form a bond with his new friends even without them present.

In the coming days they would descend into the Temple of Bhaal and face the horrors of Orin and her followers. It was not the first time he was confronted by a spawn of Bhaal. He hoped it would be his last though: but no matter the 3rd or 10th time. He would get rid of this evil one way or the other. He needed to trust his company. He needed to trust himself again.

After that it was the brain. After that it would be the Guild. After that there would be another evil to tame no doubt and innocent to protect once more. Regardless of when, Minsc was ready to be there.