#bad as me

[slithergaunt]

"I'm the one with a gun,

Most likely to run!

I'm the car in the weeds.

If you cut me,

I bleed.

You're the same kinda bad as me!"

Pretty sure Tom Waits' song Bad As Me was in my head when doodled these goofs. I still kinda like em.

Tom Waits is a master when it comes to conjuring up images (and novels, but that's not important right now) ;>

"Bad As Me" always kinda feels to me like the theme song that a Disney villain would sing to introduce themselves into the story. Whatever sings THIS would definitely be the most horrific villain in Disney history though.

[tilbageidanmark]

I'd sell your heart to the junk-man baby for a buck, for a buck If you're looking for someone To pull you out of that ditch You're out of luck, you're out of luck The ship is sinking, the ship is sinking, the ship is sinking There's a leak, there's a leak In the boiler room The poor, the lame, the blind Who are the ones left in charge? Killers, thieves and Lawyers God's away, God's away, God's away On Business, business

[kuiperoid]

Maybe things will be better in Chicago

[cinemajunkie70]

A very happy birthday to Tom Waits!

[hansoeii]

the honda odyssey, huh?

[chiimeramanticore]

compilation of this type of post

edit: idk how much this is gonna do but since making this post i got covid and need some help, please consider it

[inkskinned]

please i love you i'm begging you bring back suspension of disbelief bring back trusting the audience like. i cannot handle any more dialogue that sounds like a legal document. "hello, i am here to talk to you about the incident from a few minutes ago, because i feel you might be unwell, and i am invested in your personal wellbeing." "thank you, i am unwell because the incident was hurtful to me due to my childhood, which was bad." I CANT!!!!

do you know how many people are mad that authors use "growled" as a word for "said"? it's just poetics! they do not literally mean "growled," it's just a common replacement for "said with force but in a low tone." it's normal! do you hear me!! help me i love you please let me out of here!!!

[kochei0]

I turn to Ares.

Thanks to Tyler Miles Lockett who allowed me to draw inspiration from his ARES piece for page 2! Look at his etsy page it's SICK

⚔️ If you want to read some queer retelling of arturian legends have a look at my webtoon

[almondpiglet]

ppl were drawing mikus from all over so heres habesha miku and her lil twin sibs rin and len!!

[butchfalin]

the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again

[lgbtlunaverse]

The world exists in such a baffling state of simultaneous sex-aversion and sex-hegemony. Every social platform on the internet is trying to banish sex workers to the shadow realm but I can't post a tweet without at least two bots replying P U S S Y I N B I O. People are self-censoring sex to seggs and $3× but every other ad you see is still filled with half-naked women. Rightwingers want queer people arrested for so much as existing in the same postal code as a child and are also drumming up a moral panic about how teenage boys aren't getting laid enough. I feel like I'm losing my mind.

[charlikesalmon]

space oddity

[tilbageidanmark]

Step right up, step right up, step right up,

Everyone's a winner, bargains galore

That's right, you too can be the proud owner

Of the quality goes in before the name goes on

One-tenth of a dollar, one-tenth of a dollar, we got service after sales

You need perfume? we got perfume, how 'bout an engagement ring?

Something for the little lady, something for the little lady,

Something for the little lady, hmm

Three for a dollar

We got a year-end clearance, we got a white sale

And a smoke-damaged furniture, you can drive it away today

Act now, act now, and receive as our gift, our gift to you

They come in all colors, one size fits all

No muss, no fuss, no spills, you're tired of kitchen drudgery

Everything must go, going out of business, going out of business

Going out of business sale

Fifty percent off original retail price, skip the middle man

Don't settle for less

How do we do it? how do we do it? volume, volume, turn up the volume

Now you've heard it advertised, don't hesitate

Don't be caught with your drawers down,

Don't be caught with your drawers down

You can step right up, step right up

That's right, it filets, it chops, it dices, slices,

Never stops, lasts a lifetime, mows your lawn

And it mows your lawn and it picks up the kids from school

It gets rid of unwanted facial hair, it gets rid of embarrassing age spots,

It delivers a pizza, and it lengthens, and it strengthens

And it finds that slipper that's been at large

under the chaise lounge for several weeks

And it plays a mean Rhythm Master,

It makes excuses for unwanted lipstick on your collar

And it's only a dollar, step right up, it's only a dollar, step right up

'Cause it forges your signature

If not completely satisfied, mail back unused portion of product

For complete refund of price of purchase

Step right up

Please allow thirty days for delivery, don't be fooled by cheap imitations

You can live in it, live in it, laugh in it, love in it

Swim in it, sleep in it,

Live in it, swim in it, laugh in it, love in it

Removes embarrassing stains from contour sheets, that's right

And it entertains visiting relatives, it turns a sandwich into a banquet

Tired of being the life of the party?

Change your shorts, change your life, change your life

Change into a nine-year-old Hindu boy, get rid of your wife,

And it walks your dog, and it doubles on sax

Doubles on sax, you can jump back Jack, see you later alligator

See you later alligator

And it steals your car

It gets rid of your gambling debts, it quits smoking

It's a friend, and it's a companion,

And it's the only product you will ever need

Follow these easy assembly instructions it never needs ironing

Well it takes weights off hips, bust, thighs, chin, midriff,

Gives you dandruff, and it finds you a job, it is a job

And it strips the phone company free take ten for five exchange,

And it gives you denture breath

And you know it's a friend, and it's a companion

And it gets rid of your traveler's checks

It's new, it's improved, it's old-fashioned

Well it takes care of business, never needs winding,

Never needs winding, never needs winding

Gets rid of blackheads, the heartbreak of psoriasis,

Christ, you don't know the meaning of heartbreak, buddy,

C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon

'Cause it's effective, it's defective, it creates household odors,

It disinfects, it sanitizes for your protection

It gives you an erection, it wins the election

Why put up with painful corns any longer?

It's a redeemable coupon, no obligation, no salesman will visit your home

We got a jackpot, jackpot, jackpot, prizes, prizes, prizes, all work guaranteed

How do we do it, how do we do it, how do we do it, how do we do it

We need your business, we're going out of business

We'll give you the business

Get on the business end of our going-out-of-business sale

Receive our free brochure, free brochure

Read the easy-to-follow assembly instructions, batteries not included

Send before midnight tomorrow, terms available,

Step right up, step right up, step right up

You got it buddy: the large print giveth, and the small print taketh away

Step right up, you can step right up, you can step right up

C'mon step right up

(Get away from me kid, you bother me...)

Step right up, step right up, step right up, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon

Step right up, you can step right up, c'mon and step right up,

C'mon and step right up

[podcastwizard]

cashier: ok that'll be $20

me (visibly sweating): ah, yes, of course! a perfectly reasonable price for a grilled cheese and a small smoothie! that was exactly the price i expected you to say when i ordered a single grilled cheese and a smoothie and my vision is NOT getting blurry as we speak! i am a perfectly normal temperature and my speech patterns are natural and even because this is the countenance of an individual who expected to pay 20 american dollars for a single grilled cheese and a smoothie!

cashier: where's all that blood coming from