#bUT theres not as much insight into them in gtn and htn as there is in ntn

[scalierpepper]

God, I can't stop thinking about what Camilla's internal dialogue must be like after GtN

She's such a quiet character and really seems to try to keep up a stoic appearance but like, man she really has a lot of shit going on and her development between GtN and NtN is so insane but still seemingly subtle.

I can't even begin to imagine what the final day on Canaan House must have felt like to her because in many ways she's kind of a weird mirror to harrow right?? Her Necromancer has just sacrificed himself to save her life, tragically failed at doing so, and now she's all alone trying her best to collect the bone fragment of the person closest to her? Clinging on to a plan b that, as far as she knows, could have already failed! The fact she even let Palamedes consider a plan b like this would be unthinkable for the Camilla of NtN! She's just incredibly out of her depth the entire time, probably trying her best not just to break down

Do you ever think she resents Palamedes for that day? Whenever she was looking at his bone fragments, or even when he was back and now in his mind it's like. The fact that he acts like she's the reckless one, that he keeps getting mad at her to take better care of herself, do you ever think she hears that and just. remembers picking up pieces of his skull?

Maybe that's why she's relieved when they get to perform grand lysis, she doesn't need to be scared that he'll risk his life for her again and he doesn't need to be scared she'll do the same, they both choose to die together and make something new, someone new that risks their life only for themselves?

Idk, I just think their whole story is so scary and beautiful, they really did go loud.